#contradictory labels discourse

[bisexualsafespace]

exclus: the sam is homophobic because you are claiming to be oppressed while being heterosexual

sexual and romantic identity is more than just being oppressed, its experience, its identity, its emotion, its love, its sex, if you think its only about oppression, you're wrong, not denying that people saph/achi on both sides have much more discrimination than hetbi's or hetgays, but again someone else's experiences aren't "claiming oppression" they began their journey with the same question "what am I" "am I a lesbian" they all asked those questions.

[rjtbot]

Btw every queer identity is "problematic" because queerphobia is still a thing. Even the "normal" ones are considered problematic by somebody. Bring the community together instead of fighting over contradictory, problematic, etc. labels. Casting out one "problematic" queer will only cause another group to be targeted next because that's the goal of queerphobia.

[afabtransfemserver]

AFAB Transfems : Want a community?

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You've probably felt imposing or unwelcome in transfeminine spaces, maybe you even feel isolated.

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This is not an education server. For safety of our members, only the people described will be permitted to join. We are not here to convince you “why AFAB Transfems are valid”, we hear enough discourse about our existence. We deserve a space to exist within our genders and to relate to others like us free from outside influence. If you personally don't agree with the concept of AFAB transfeminine people, you can ignore this post in its entirety. As important as allies can be to trans communities, we specifically are controversial to the point that allowing outsiders can quickly become hazardous. Even those who state their support will not be allowed unless they consider themselves a potential member of the community. Please do not join to try to learn about us.

We hope to see you there! https://discord.gg/4AJCNQ6gzF

[that-satireguy]

idk weird as hell that people are framing trans male lesbians as like 'men who desperately want to fuck lesbians', but largely speaking cis lesbians are the ones raping or coercing trans men.

There is no pattern of trans male sexual assault on lesbians but there is sure as hell a pattern of lesbians assaulting trans men who they view as a kind of woman, akin to a sex object. (Similarly to how butches are treated in certain dynamics but worse).

(Inspired by recent reminicisng that made me realise I got sa'd and didn't really notice lol)

[chaos-in-one]

It's so funny to me when people yell & make entire posts about how xyz identity isn't valid

Like, okay? You saying that doesn't stop anyone who labels that way from existing, or continuing to use that label. Your opinion on the "validity" of someone else's identity means very little- at the most it'll just make someone who labels that way feel like shit for a bit.

But generally? Our identities don't rely on your validation. You saying that my, or anyone else's identity "isn't valid" doesn't make it go away. I'm still going to be exactly who I was before you said that. That identity is still going to be a part of me. It doesn't just disappear the second someone doesn't believe in it.

[transmasc-lesboy-ramblings]

Can we talk about how absolutly crazy it is to just..decide what people can and cannot identify as??? Especially when said person is a stranger and you do not know the full complexity of this person's identity??? And having a meltdown about the stranger's identity??? And arguing with them about THEIR identify??? And sending those people death threats because the person's identity is more complex than you can understand or/and they use a certain label but don't fit perfectly into your definition??? And claming it's for the ''well-being'' of the community??? Can we talk about how fucking insane exclusionists are???

[contradictoryidentitysurvey]

Contradictory Identity Survey 2025

The contradictory identity survey is a new yearly survey surrounding contradictory identities, including those considered contradictory by their users. If you identify with at least one at least one identity that is considered contradictory by either yourself or others, and are 13 or over, you can participate. You absolutely do not have to do this if you do not want.

link under cut

[xoxo-ren-xoxo]

exclus love to be like 'theres no reason to identify as a bi lesbian (etc)!' and then when you give them your reasons they block you

[imoga-pride]

Just because some identity is contradictory to you doesn't mean it can't make sense. Actually, nuanced identities are often contradictory when you know the basics of it, ignoring all details and complexity a multilabeled or combined identity can be.

If you think cisgender nonbinary people can't have a definition bc then it would describe someone who is not cis, then you're in the wrong bc just cause something describes you it doesn't mean it applies or include you bc the identity requires self-identification as well.

Same goes for bi lesbian, demisexual, or lesboy, you 'are technically lesboy' (/demi/lunian) but refuses to label yourself as such? Cool then you're not/don't experience that identity 🤯 and that's okay. But to imply anyone with such identity are not that thing bc it can't exist, then you're being a reality denier, bc ppl with such identities exist regardless if you recognize them or not. For instance, just bc someone uses ungrammatical conlangs doesn't mean that language can't exist. In fact, it's written already and it's on you if you're gonna cry or ignore.

Also transhet people are allowed to be nonbinary; binaryn't transfems/transmascs are allowed to be hetero due to their alignment, presentation, AGAB, or any other typical reason.

[dlnorampage]

you have a great blog and i appreciate the reblogs just now a ton just thought you should know

thank you so much & i hope you have a really good day!

i was kind of spiralling over the toxicity of queer discourse and how it affects us as a community. we are infighting in what's meant to be a safespace for everyone. we shouldn't squabble over labels and flags and all that. in the end we're all queer and there are much more important problems to focus like how theres places that neglect trans healthcare.

trans youth are in need. children are dying. and yet we focus on such minuscule gripes because some random person is identifying as this instead of that.

i recently realized how ive always been ostracized back and forth in the majority of my 'safe'spaces. being told i'm not valid because i identify a certain way. what counts as "valid" in the first place? what are the criteria for being "valid", when does it stop being "valid"? is it when their identity is "too complex" for you?

we are all tired of being ridiculed by queerphobes. we don't need to bring all that hate to our own community.

no one should ever feel ashamed of how they identify as. no one should ever feel ashamed over preferring certain labels over others. what defines your experience is yourself, after all. not others.

the shunning hurts the progress of self-discovery, because you are constantly told that simply being a certain is wrong. you are told that being yourself is wrong.

from the bottom of my heart, to all people that need to hear this. love to all queer people with identities that are commonly frowned upon. love to all queer people with "contradictory" labels. please keep strong.

i am no longer afraid to admit who i am, and you shouldnt be either. i dont need to hide my true self to fit the standards of other people, and you dont need to do so either.

to the exclusionists, unfollow me if you havent already; i really dont need you here. and to all queer people: you are all inherently beautiful.

[sepiamestus]

"I love weird queers 🥰" you guys can't even handle bi lesbians

[thescaryhyperfem]

anti contradictory label mfs will make fun of the most drop dead gorgeous, pleasing to the eye flag ever made

[mogaiminty]

its honestly really frustrating and kinda hurts when people say they support lesboys/turigirls but also say "cis men cant be lesboys" or "cis women cant be turigirls" as if genderqueer , cistrans, adgender, and overall gender diverse cis people dont exist

[icannotgetoverbirds]

just to nip this in the bud

unfriendly fucking reminder that the rules of gender and sexuality are made up and arbitrary and literally do not matter. transmasc lesbians, bi lesbians, etc all belong in the queer community. if a label seems contradictory to you, congratulations! it's none of your goddamned business.

and as a side note referencing That One Person: if you are brave enough to be a fucking giraffe even though you're human-shaped, then who on god's green earth is within their rights to stop you? as long as you're not hurting anyone, congratulations! It's Not Any Of Their Gotdam Business!!!!!

[chaos-in-one]

The way that people on tik tok in particular will get so incredibly MAD if you don't explicitly hate whatever niche group of people 90% of people irl have never even heard of will forever be wild to me

Like it happens on most socials to some extent, but I see it a lot more often on tik tok where people will get angry if you even just don't give a fuck, literally any opinion other than explicitly hating them

[transmasc-lesboy-ramblings]

I sometime wish the online queer community will realize that throwing members of your own community under the bus will do nothing for queer liberation and it is frankly extremely fucking pathetic to do so,especially for the tiniest bit of ''acceptance'' from bigots.

Queer people are not responsible for their own oppression. A queer person having an ''odd'',complex or/and contradictory identity is not the reason that queerphobia exist. Throwing these people under the bus will not solve queerphobia. Bigots do not give a singular shit if you are a ''weird queer'' or a ''normal queer''. Most of the time, these people do not even know anything about these more ''odd'',complex or/and contradictory identities. They will hate you regardless if you have a ''normal'' queer identity or a ''weird'' one.

We,especially in time like these where queer people are loosing their rights all over the world,must stay united. Making these unneccessary discourses will do nothing but make the job of bigots easier. We must focus on staying together to fight against bigots.