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( @audrasmythe )
Malachi is not a plumber - and there's no reason for him to be fixing showers. He has a full-fledged business to attend to. And yet, when Audra mentions that she can't use her own apartment to bathe, Malachi has already figured out the closest hardware store and where to buy the replacement hose thread, drain snake, and rubber washers.
His old jean shirt (Mik's from the 80s, but he's undergone a style change and Malachi has stayed True Denim Strong) has the sleeves rolled up, long hair tied back. The man had shown up with a very concentrated and serious expression on his face. He stays quiet as he works, until he sits on the covered toilet with a grimace, and looks back at Audra. "Your landlord should be taken out back and shot." He states simply, hands on his knees.
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Bruce: I know it’s hard, but you must remain forgiving and merciful, Jason.
Tim, who had to watch Bruce skin a man alive like a piece of salmon with a batarang for saying something rude about his then deceased son, throw him in the back of the Batmobile, and drive him to the hospital just to beat him up again:
#Tim didn’t get violent Batman. he got cop batman.#I love when Bruce is dark and violent and merciless as batman in Tim’s run truly a source of nourishment#bruce wayne#tim drake#incorrect quotes#dc#dc comics#batman
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He's using the batarang as a spoon to eat ice cream
#legends only#for context he bought said ice cream immediately after beating the shit out of some roided out cops in a grocery store#nightwing 1996#Nightwing 1996 issue 79#nightwing#dick grayson#batman#batman comics#batfam#batfamily#dc#dc comics#dcu#dc universe#liveblogging
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If you saw me agreeing with being annoyed about wasted helium in a fictional context and were like "I bet she has some more helium based anger in her life" good news LAPD fucked up a raid on a medical facility they thought was a pot farm and flat out ruined thousands of gallons of the stuff.
#Back in the day the lab I worked in went through the stuff at a hell of a rate#But that was to actually do something at least#It's also fucking humiliating that a SF paper gets to write up our cops being dipshits#I am so fucking mad about both these aspects the wasted helium and that SF gets to laugh at us#I wrote a very very angry email to my city councilor but I do that like twice a week and I don't think he reads them or anything#So I suspect this one will also not move much
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as far as one piece antagonists go Crocodile truly gets absolutely scooby-doo’d at unmatched levels
He immediately falls for a phone scam and from basically little garden to rainbase he doesn’t even know the strawhats are alive (and clowning towards him at incredible speed). As soon as he does, they’re in his house tearing at his walls and bringing marines into his villain lair.
He uses a literal floor trap door over a gator pit to catch them, gets phone scammed again, full scooby-doo chase scenes after Chopper through the streets while still missing him, and suddenly his prisoners have escaped his impossible cage, and his giant bananagators are dead. and Nico Robin saw it all happen.
He then spends rest of the arc complaining about those meddling kids and their dog “strawhat pirates and their weird pet” and at no point does he even know how many strawhats there are.
Like yeah he keeps having plans on top of plans to stop everything Vivi can do but also she keeps coming up with a new thing to do (Tom and Jerry ass dynamic).
Part of it is that he’s underestimating them and keeps grandstanding villain monologuing but also teens keep killing hundreds of his grand line bounty hunters and he straight up does not know what is happening.
Cause he IS trying to kill them he’s sending top assassins after them and ripping out luffy’s organs, the whole time he’s yelling HOW ARE YOU ALIVE?? DIE. as whack-a-mole Luffy keeps inventing new ways to hit him.
#who would win: an untouchable warlord w 1000 plans and a million agents or 1 bouncy boy and his 4-10 (croco has NO idea how many) companion#he literally says like go kill all 4 strawhats and their pet thing verbatim#p sure he thinks there’s like at least a dozen strawhats by the end and more then one mr prince#sanji and chopper are basically shaggy and scooby throughout rainbase like if they had stopped for snacks instead then came & freed evryone#honestly the plans on plans is the only reason he made it as far as he did cause they were knocking through them mach 10#he was in mob boss spy thiller mode and the strawhats are NOT matching his energy#he’s getting conned he’s getting clowned on his mouth is punched off mid line and now someone has called the cops (marines)#sir crocodile#monkey d luffy#nefertari vivi#tony tony chopper#black leg sanji#roronoa zoro#nami#usopp#straw hat pirates#one piece#alabasta arc
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he’s so silly
#rereading SoN is such a blast#percy is terrifying frank and hazel#giving them heart attacks#like that’s the entire book#this boy got released in the wild and the first thing he did was steal a cop car#percy jackson#pjo#hoo#son of neptune#my art
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What FNAF movie Vanessa’s REAL job is..
#myart#chloesimagination#comic#fnaf#five nights at freddy's#fnaf fanart#fnaf movie#vanessa afton#vanessa shelly#fnaf vanessa#mike schmidt#william afton#springtrap#listen I didn’t think much about Vanessa being a cop#UNTIL it’s revealed William is her dad in the movie#AND it clicked there thr only reason she is a cop#is to hide her fathers crimes#which is super 9n brand for William ngl#he would use his kids as tools to get himself outta hot water#curious to see if in the next movie if Vanessa is still a cop#or more so moves away from the occupation#now being detached from her fathers grasps#it’ll be interesting to see!!#William winning that worst father award no matter what 😤
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The Biblically Accurate Trio in TLT
#it’s not that they don’t have the other two it’s that they all had their smarts privileges revoked#Annabeth lost her street smarts and common sense privileges when she tried to buy all that candy with only $200#Percy lost his common sense and book smarts privileges when he couldn’t figure out he was a son of Poseidon after using literal water powers#grover lost his book smarts and street smarts privileges after trying to reason with Medusa and a cop respectively#they’re all my children tho#don’t worry they’ll get their privileges back#eventually#percy jackson#pjo#percy jackon and the olympians#percy jackson and the olympians#pjo tv show#percy jackson tv show#pjo spoilers#percy jackson the lightning thief#pjo series#annabeth chase#grover underwood
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Listen, you should never film strangers in public without their consent, but I swear there need to be fines or something for people who do that shit in some spaces. For example: I had to go to the ER last night, and some jerk filmed a woman who just came in and was clearly having an asthma attack. She immediately got to go back, and he was unhappy about that. Believe me, I get that it sucks having to wait when you're in pain, but you don't get to pick who deserves care when. The medical system in the US is a nightmare, and the ER could be the worst moment of someone's life. No one deserves to be recorded because some jack ass believes someone doesn't look like they need care.
This is fine to reblog. People who film strangers should be shamed if nothing else.
#ccyy talks#sorry for posting this here but I'm pissed and this shit really needs to stop#For all I know he recorded me too cause I'm young and look healthy but got to go back next#Sorry about your cough buddy but the way things work I was a more immediate emergency#1k#5k#10k#30k#this post clearly has a life of its own now#and in case someone wants to know some clarifications for common points#people in a position of authority/actively hurting someone with the intent to protect/help the person is fine#so cops doctors nurses mental health workers and educators (to name a few) who actively are abusing their power and authority? free game#this post was filming random ass people for Content(tm)#random ass people more so those in distress aren't your content and you do not know the harm you can do to someone by posting that shit#50k
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Always Favors You
Another Sibling Danny and Jason idea!!
"Are you Jason Peter Todd?!" demanded a deep and commanding tone from the strange glowing being in front of them.
All the Bats stiffened and tensed, no doubt gearing up for a fight against the being that somehow knew Red Hood's full name.
Jason, Red Hood, decided to put on a brave front despite no doubt cursing in his head and wondering how the heck did this thing know his full freaking name.
"Whose asking." he snarled out, his hands twitching for his gun when the huge glowing knight with purple flames coming out of his helmet and cape, who was riding on a nightmare looking horse while they all had been in the cave going over tonight's patrol.
The Knight didn't seemed bothered by his response nor did he even seem to care or flinch when Batman made his own demand on 'Why was he there and who was he' or when Damian unsheathed his sword and pointed it towards him. Instead the strange glowing Knight reached to it side and pulled out... A glowing scroll? Huh. (Also he completely unnerved everyone in the room when the Knight didn't even react when Batman had tossed a Baterang when he reached for his side)
The Knight opened the scroll and spoke clearly with purpose.
"Jason Peter Todd,
You are hereby invited as a special guest of honor to the crowning of our future King of the Infinite Realms.
Daniel Phantom, once Daniel Jackson Fenton, and once Daniel Austen Todd.
Prince of the Infinite Realms, the Keeper of Balance, The Peacekeeping Halfa, the Defeater of the Tyrant King Pariah Dark, The Great One, Youngest of the Ancients, Ancient of Space, The Bridge between Life and Death.
You, the half-brother of our King, have been given the highest of honors for your past actions and will be given housing and food in the Realms and Phantom's Keep, for the week long event. Personal servants and attendants will be at your disposal and a seamstress will be on hand to tailor make your attire for the Coronation.
Signed: Clockwork. Ancient of Time. Watcher of the Infinite Timeline. Kronos. Mentor and Adviser.
PS: I shall have Fright Knight ("Me" the Knight bluntly said for a second) leave this scroll along with a personal one for you from Daniel to read over and once you make up your mind sign the bottom of the scroll.
I do hope in time you will pick the right choice Jason Todd, we of the Infinite Realms would like to reward you for your actions. After all, if you hadn't gotten young Daniel away from your father that night all those years ago, we would never had gained our Prince nor be free from our once Tyrant King.
Ah, one more thing.
The Infinite Realms will always favor you Jason."
Jason felt like he couldn't breath as Fright Knight? Rolled up the scroll, pulled a letter from his side, and held out the two items for him to take.
#danny phantom#danny fenton#crossover#dp x dc#blue rambles#danny phantom dc#writing ideas#random idea#dpxdc#Danny and Jason are half brothers#Fright Knight#Clockwork mention#Jason saved baby Danny when Willis came home drunk one night and their mom was out of her mind at the moment#Danny had been crying for food and Willis was getting annoyed#Jason managed to run off with baby Danny to a few towns over and put him in a baby box before getting caught a few other towns over by cops#and was shipped back to Gotham#kept his mouth shut about where he put his brother and took any punishment that came afterwords#It set up the timeline where Danny is going to become the Infinite Realms new King#Hence why the kinda sentient Realms 'rewarded' Jason later on when he died aka bringing him back to life#I love the idea of a kinda sentient Realms tbh#it loves Danny because he's been helping rebuild and mend the Realms#Danny is its fav King thus favors those related to him#well everyone but Willis#he's in Walkers prison btw#I want Jason to go tbh and see how every ghost is getting everything ready for the coronation#its chaotic yet organized somehow#I want more Danny's coronation stories#Like I love already King or just finding out Prince Danny but we need more coronation ones tbh
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Bruce coming home one day to find Robin Jason clinging onto a chandelier with Dick below him cheering him on.
Bruce: Jason what are you doing?
Jason: Dick said that you missed his antics after he moved out and so he’s teaching me how to be a better son
Dick: After this we’re going to drive the Batmobile into the bay :D
Jason: We’re going to what? I mean yeah! Right into the water.
Jason trying to whisper to Dick: Dick I can’t swim though
This just further fuels the chaotic dynamic of Dick and Jason during a time where Dick was still going through his teenage angst and was absolutely not a benevolent role model LMAO
I mentioned it in this post, but it's just so funny to me to imagine a Jason who grew up with an absolutely WILD Dick Grayson as an older brother, while the younger batkids grew up with a more mellowed out and mature (arguable but when measured against the other kids, he wins by a landslide) Dick Grayson.
Robin!Jason era:
Dick: You wanna go out and get high?
Jason: I can't, I have homework.
Dick, sputtering: HOMEWORK?
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Dick, about to do an elaborate (and totally not dangerous) acrobatic move in the manor: Watch this, littlewing
Jason: You shouldn't do that, it'll make Bruce upset.
Dick, on the brink of angry tears: Why are you like this.
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Jason, dejected: Listen, I know you don't approve of me because you think I'm not good enough as Robin, but-
Dick: Not good enough as Robin? I don't care about that, I just think you're a little bitch
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Dick taking Jason out on a hangout for the first time: OK, looks like I got my work cut out for me. Take out a notepad and write everything down. I will NOT have my successor embarrass me like this. So what you wanna do to piss off Bruce-
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[Years later, Jason returning to Gotham with the fury of a thousand suns and the chaos to match it]: I'm gonna make your life a living HELL, Bruce
Dick, older and relatively more chilled out: Okayyyyy, maybe let's just– calm down a lil, haha, no need for the theatrics
Jason, betrayed, observing a Dick Grayson who is teaching his new younger siblings to behave and be mature: Dick, what the FUCK
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Present!Dick, mentoring Tim: Make sure not to be too impulsive, don't wanna raise Bruce's blood pressure
Red Hood!Jason spying on them from afar: Who even ARE you??
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Jason: So you teach me ALL of that, only to turn into the ONE thing you despised so greatly all those years ago
Dick, sweating: Well-
Jason: I'm ASHAMED. How can you be worthy of being called my PREDECESSOR?
#Jason (disappointedly): you either die a villain or live long enough to see yourself become a hero#Dick: we have so much to catch up on! anyways so Tim became Robin and I'm a cop in Bludha-#Jason (incredibly distraught): YOURE A COP??!?#Jason to tim: Alright looks like I have to be the one to pass on Dick's legacy now LISTEN HERE-#ok but seriously Tim is already insane on his own. kid didn't need dick's guidance at all. he's just like that#imagine the chaotic older brother u grew up with turned out to be a cop id literally throw up#jason todd#red hood#dick grayson#nightwing#tim drake#red robin#robin!jason#batfam#batfamily#batkids#batbros#bruce wayne#batman#dc#incorrect quotes#crack#fanatical asks#fanatical posting
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gorgug should autocrit on all future popularity rolls for his time at augefort because you can not tell me this school filled with teenage anarchists would see that video of him oinking at a cop and not think he's the coolest guy alive
#like imagine the punk rock drummer on your schools football team who is also part of the popular group oinks at a cop#he's immediately a local legend#d20#dimension 20#fantasy high#fhjy spoilers#fantasy high junior year#fhjy#fantasy high junior year spoilers#gorgug thistlespring
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Paulina was walking home from her little self-care date~ when she noticed a familiar figure, she slowed, double checked to make sure it wasn't some random civilian, grinned and-
threw her knife!
Wes caught it, because of course he did cautious bastard. And yes she realises this now that fighting on the street was not the smartest move but it was a long time since she saw her friends from Amity and they got along fairly well with Weston.
So they had a good time, she managed to nip him on the cheek with her knife (after taking it back) he left her with a new bruise (it will be gone by tomorrow noon) and then they were both taken in by the police...
And now she has to explain why she did what she did to the GCPD and Ancients help probably Batman as soon as she gets back to her apartment. Who could've guessed that having a friendly brawl would be so taboo in Gotham? (who is she kidding of course it's suspicious it looked like they were trying to kill each other to any normal person!)
and she's not sure how much she should say!
#dpxdc#liminal amity park#amity parkers in gotham#Wes is laughing but he knows he's fucked too#Ghosts bond by fighting#liminals too#damn i want to read that#feel free to use#Wes is gonna call Danny to bail him out#Danny is somehow amused and not surprised#Paulina was having a good time until she didn't#because cops#paulina sanchez#wes weston#Wes figured bats's identities but keeps to himself#bats be bats#paulina has very pretty ornate knife#paulina does knife throwing
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Wayne is picking up some groceries from Melvald’s when he sees a kid slumped in the passenger seat of the chief’s truck. He’s got a black eye and a sour look on his face, and he’s parked right next to him.
Wayne puts his groceries in his truck and then taps on the window, “What’ya in for?”
“Living my life.”
Wayne laughs to himself at that before asking, “Didn’t get that black eye putting someone in the hospital?”
The kid snorts, “Hardly. Dickhead sucker punched me when I told him to stop messing with a bunch of kids. Didn’t have the chance to even hit back before Hopper’s on my ass.”
Wayne takes that into consideration and looks back at the store where Hopper is leaned over the check out counter, talking to Joyce Byers. He tilts his head back and decides, “Wanna get out of here?”
“What?”
“Prison break?” Wayne suggests, tilts his head towards his truck. “I’ll be the getaway driver.”
“Seriously?”
He gets a real smile out of a kid and his eyes light up the way Eddie’s does when he thinks he’s getting away with something. Wayne ends up taking the kid back to his house to hide out since he has a friend in Forest Hills, meets Max Mayfield, and has the best breakfast for dinner he’s ever experienced.
When Eddie finally exits his bedroom into this apparent alternate universe, he asks, “…why is Steve Harrington in our kitchen?”
#Wayne ‘fuck the police’ Munson#Wayne knows a good kid when he sees one and doesn’t care about the law so…#also it’s very funny to picture this from Hopper’s POV#he sees Steve get punched a month out from a concussion#stops by to ask Joyce to keep an eye on El until he gets back from take Steve to get checked out at the hospital#walks out to an empty truck#hopper is a good enough cop to find out where he is and does come knocking#steve harrington#Wayne Munson#eddie munson
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Harry works on his resume
#disco elysium#fanart#Harry du bois#disco Elysium skills#rhetoric#I think about Harry trying to apply for jobs so he can quit being a cop a lot#can you IMAGINE this man interviewing for some grocery job#halfway through the interviewer realizes Harry’s been the one asking the questions for the last 10 minutes#logic check to explain why he’s the best candidate for the job but it fails
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i think dan should get to be a little weird too. as a treat
#my art#re animator#herbert west#daniel cain#dan cain#danbert#no but srsly guys i get that hes the normal guy but you forget ... HES ALSO WEIRD !!! HES SO STRANGE !!!#if he was normal he would have called the cops on herbert ages ago#but guess what babey he ... well technically he did call the cops but he waited like 20 years to do it so .. !!#bro was an enabler dont forget that#sorry im like rlly crazy about dan...#which is unfortuante bc i feel kind of alone in that like YES herberts a baddie YES hes litterally me#but dan....... DAAAAAAAAAAAN (eagle screeching)#what the fuck am i saying!#edit hey guys its actually lucid dog that rant you see above you was written at likes 6am after an all nighter#we all know dan is weird i mainly meant i think he should get to be PORTRAYED as weird more#really im just weird about him (<3) and i need him to reflect that
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