#idk what the context behind him coming back from war is -

[1dklikesthings]

FANDROID IS FUCKIGN BACK LETS GOOOO !!!!!!!

[httpsghostie]

ok this is the video i mentioned, like imagine könig in this, i want to tie his hands and feet and make a mess out of him :((( imagine him crying out of frustration that he can't touch you (and he makes a mental note to punish you as soon as he gets released), so overwhelmed and trying to scape the entire time, so cute :(( you make the context, my brain isn't creative enough to think of how we end up in this situation. sorry if i misspelled something and again i love your blog it's amazing !!*:! also i'm sorry if this make you unconfortable somehow idk?

Enemy pt 1

pt 2

TW: porn

and I strike again with another questionable scenario

this is just... I... uhm... well...

there's no such thing as crossing the limits with me I'm a fucking whore

Summary: you interrogate an enemy soldier in a different approach.

Word Count: 1,5k

Warnings: smut, König x female!reader, they're both a bit crazy, male overstimulation, edging, knife play (if you squint), glove kink, no use of y/n

masterlist

Recently, your team had brought an enemy for interrogation, and you were the one assigned to get the job done.

"Make him talk, we don't care how." They said.

You got in the cell, hands sweating nervously as you saw the man you were dealing with. You've met before, a long while ago, and he didn't change a thing. He's still arrogant, like he wasn't far within a hostile environment, his hands and feet in chains, in a cell that has never seen daylight. The only thing in the room being the chair he was sitting on and a fucked up mattress.

You crossed your arms as you entered the room, not knowing if he was able to recognize you from the mask you wore. But your voice, he could never forget the sweet melody of your voice moaning his name a few years ago when he fucked you senseless at an abandoned house, in the middle of war.

It happened fast, you were sweeping the place and he was there. You missed your shot when he pushed your gun upwards and tried to strangle you, but soon backed down when saw you were a defenseless damsel in distress.

And you found yourself pressed against a wall being fucked by an enemy soldier, just because he felt like it.

You try to shake off the thoughts that creep on your dirty brain, and as soon as the door gets locked behind you, his body relaxes on the chair. 

"So, we meet again." He cleared his throat. Pretentious prick. 

"König." You start, raising your eyebrows. "I guess you won't be using your free will to tell me what the code is, will you?" You walked towards him, he was still tall, even when he was sunk on the chair with his legs spreaded.

"My free will has better things to do than to hand out codes like candy at a parade. I prefer keeping my secret to myself. Yours too." You could feel the creepy smile that lit up his face. How could you ever do that to yourself?

"They won't believe you." You shrug, slowly walking from side to side on the cell, arms behind your back, your heavy boots hitting the concrete floor. "They're too busy torturing your general for info." His eyes widened and he straightened himself on the chair, tensing up. "So, what are you hiding, pretty boy?"

He flexed his muscles in response, trying to get rid of the chains that kept him restrained. But the praise, coming from your lips, it was impossible for him to contain an enormous wave of heat that destroyed any ounce of self respect he had. He lowered his head, but looked at you through his eyebrows.

"I assume we'll have to do this the hard way then." You took the knife from your belt and stood in front of him, running it along his collarbone and stopping at his chin, lifting it up. "Such a beautiful pair of eyes you got, 'wonder what you hide behind that hood." You say, lifting the fabric of his mask.

"Gonna use flirting as your way to get around this?" He chuckles, looking away.

"I'm offended." You fake a gasp and hold a hand to your chest. "Wasn't that what you did to me?" You're just able to get a laugh from him.

"You wanted that to happen." He looked at your eyes again.

"And you're wanting, too." You stick the knife in the wooden chair between his legs and he jolts in panic.

"Fuck, are you insane?" He looks down and at you again, and you laugh. 

You crouch in front of him, spreading his legs further, and laying your elbow on his thigh. The tip of your finger touches the end of your knife and plays with it, watching how his thighs tense.

"I might be." You say, looking at him. "But I always get what I want."

"You're fucking crazy." He chuckles and looks to the sides, trying to contain his embarrassment as a bulge slowly shows up on his pants.

You take the knife from the chair and put it on your belt again, moving your gloved hands towards his belt and pulling him up. He's heavy as fuck, it was almost impossible to do it if he didn't stand up, towering over you.

You pushed him back, and because of his feet tangled in chains, he fell back on the mattress, bucking his hips up as you eagerly unfastened his belt.

"You weren't this straightforward when we first met." He chuckled and looked up.

"What can I say? 'Guess your taste is addictive." You remembered the bitter taste of his release when he ruthlessly fucked your throat back in that house.

You pulled his hard member out, lifting your mask just below your nose to spit on it, and he whines as you wrap your gloved hand around it, jerking it up and down slowly. He pleads, trying to fuck your hand, but you pull away chuckling and he sighs.

"Let's make a deal, shall we?" You ran your finger along his length, stopping at his tip.

"I won't talk." He gritted his teeth.

"Then you won't cum." You give him a sly smile as you pull the mask down again.

Your hand grabs his dick, jerking it roughly, and he can't help but whine as he tries to get away from your touch. He's so desperate it's pathetic, and he moans as you set the pace.

He tries to move, to get away from the chains, he thinks about how bad he wants to be free and pin you down on the mattress and fuck you until you're begging him to stop, knowing he wouldn't stop until he was satisfied.

Your touch becomes too much on him, almost too harsh to bear, and he cries as he feels his cock throbbing as hard as it could, knowing that he wouldn't last long if you kept going this way.

And suddenly, as he's about to cum, you pull away again, leaving him whimpering at the sudden loss of contact.

"Fuck, why did you do this?" He whines desperately.

"It's simple, you give me what I want and I'll give you what you want." You shrug, grabbing his member once again and going fast on it. He cries, feeling his high approaching once again.

"I'm not talking." He shakes uncontrollably.

"Aww, stubbornness only turns me on." You say. He's too overwhelmed to think about an answer, trying to get away from your grip.

You feel his body tensing up again, his hips bucking up, chasing his so wanted release. Your hand keeps its pace, but your other one blocks his tip just as he's about to cum, watching his vein twitch. He's crying and cursing at you in german, his heavy balls filled with cum as he was being denied once again.

"Come on, I'm not gonna let go until you tell me, and it's only gonna hurt more." You say, letting his dick fall back to his stomach, and one of your hands grabs his balls. He's still shaking, completely overstimulated, and you use your thighs to make him stay put.

"I only know part of it, alright?" It comes out high pitched as his voice cracks, you could feel the pain in his eyes. "The general too, and your team is going to need more than just us for the full code if you want to stop that damn operation." It's almost impossible to understand his german accent at how fast he speaks, his chest rising up and down.

His cock twitches, his tip was red and leaking, and you decide that's probably all that he's going to say, and plus you needed him for his part of the code. 

"That's it, please, maus, it's hurting." He cries. Maybe he deserved to get his award now.

"Such a good boy you are, huh, see? It wasn't hard." You stroke his dick, the praise enough to make him see stars. 

As you increase your movements, he becomes a whimpering mess once again, and deep in his brain he's thinking of how pretty you would look with his cock buried in your pussy, and how bad he will ruin you once he has his hands on you.

It's too much to take, he's trembling, making it hard for you to keep him still. And he can't hold back any longer, his thick cum spouting on your gloves and his shirt.

"Maus, please, stop." He pleads, his body giving in. You clean your gloves on his clothed thighs and get up, leaving him there, covered in white. You stand there, looking down at him and his softening length, and slowly walk towards the door. "Where are you going? Don't leave me like this."

You knock two times on the door and one of your men unlocks it. You open it, looking back at König, still there, still messy, still panting and angry, spitting out as you leave.

"You're gonna pay for this."

[mourningliliesmorningglories]

"It’s haunting to know that you still cry for something today that you also cried for 15 years ago."

Umm idk if this is too personal but would you break down why you gave each marauder the line that you did?

For some reason, Sirius' really stuck with. Literally I can't stop thinking about it.

If there was an award for best ask anon, I think you would win!!! I love when people ask about the intricacies of my writing because I just feel like everything that I write is so deeply personal to me!

This will be quite long as I think the best way to tackle this is to address each one with its context and then how I relate it to each marauder. So buckle in!!!

Anything underlined is referencing my other writing and will be linked!

See the original post here!

James: Two lives cannot overlap - one must be forgiven to forge the other. 

So I wrote this about the rivers of the Underworld in Greek mythology, in a wider piece of writing on coping with grief. It refers specifically to the river Lethe, the river of forgetting, where souls drink from it to forget their life before being reincarnated. I have mixed feeling about James as a character - on one hand as a young boy he's incredibly privileged to the point of almost ignorance but then is forced into a war he cannot fight and reasonably win. In a way this line can be applied to James in two ways: 1) he had to grow up to cope with the rapidly changing world he'd been basically thrown into and 2) harry could never defeat Voldemort if his parents were still alive. James and lily had to die so harry would have nothing to lose.

Sirius:  It’s haunting to know that you still cry for something today that you also cried for 15 years ago.

Okay so this was written in the same piece as above, in reference to a childhood memory. I cried for comfort but no one could come to me. No one chose to comfort me in that moment. I think we all have moments where we think 'I need my mum' or something similar but at it's core, its a plea for comfort - you want to be held, cradled, for the burden to be taken away. Sirius Black was denied affection as a child, denied love as an adult and then denied his life when he fell through The Veil. He had his friends as support but he also had to stare at James and Effie, Remus and Hope. He had moments where he needed parental love, where he felt like he would die without it. He was denied the chance to make sure Harry never experienced that, and when he did get the chance, it was ripped away almost immediately.

Remus: It is strange to cling onto remnants of someone who is no longer there.

This was written about losing someone and still having to live amongst their things. Everything is normal except the person is gone. It's describing that moment when you walk into a room and you feel their presence, like you're in the living room and it's so easy to convince yourself they're in the kitchen, but they aren't. The space they left behind is empty. I think with Remus, again it can apply in two ways: 1) himself - his whole identity is basically fed to him through the label of 'werewolf', the Order use him as a monster to tame a bigger beast. He is constantly mourning. In Hogwarts, he mourns his younger self. In the Order, he mourns the teenage, full of life, naive version of him. As an adult he mourns every version of himself - they trail behind him like a ball and chain. 2) everyone he loses - Remus outlives his best friends, and even the one he gets back, oh god he got him back but at what cost? Remus is a walking graveyard.

Peter: In every story, someone has to leave. This is not a burden taken lightly, nor is it one that can be shared.

I wrote this about Caesar and Brutus. When Caesar died, so did Brutus. As Brutus lives, so does Caesar. Today when one is mentioned, the other rarely goes unnamed. Brutus orchestrates the murder of Caesar because he fears his ambition and the ruin it will bring to Rome. Peter is both Caesar and Brutus. He fears Voldemort enough to do his bidding only because he's never had such power before. We see exactly how Peter's loyalty is manipulated - he felt more important to Voldemort then he did to his friends and so his loyalty changed accordingly.

Lily: The sunflowers turn to the light, but the sun will never recognise their presence.

Growth is difficult to justify in a non-physical sense. This was inherently about being an observer in my own life. We do things that have unremarkable impacts until one day the fallout of our actions are so grand we cannot outrun them. In terms of Lily, I do think in hindsight this may be more relevant to her characterisation moreso than her character. She is often represented as just a vessel to carry Harry and is overlooked as a complex character and a key member of the Order. James forgot his wand on the sofa - she protected Harry. She was an incredibly smart witch - she was, is, more than just her offspring. Treat her accordingly.

Regulus: One day we all realise that the first thing we lose is ourselves.

My earliest memory is a hospital visit and a funeral. We do not realise that the process of growth is intertwined with the ritual of loss. You are allowed to mourn the person you used to be. Death isn’t exclusive to those burned or bombed or buried. Regulus loses his brother then he loses himself. He has a role to play as the prodigal son. He is actively cutting himself open and stitching himself back up to fit seamlessly into the mould his parents have created for him. He watched Sirius fail, so he couldn't. Maybe he did believe in blood supremacy at first or maybe the whole thing was a ploy to try and grasp at the power and autonomy he'd grievously been denied his entire life. Regulus knew himself so well he'd buried the body undetectably.

Pandora: Nobody talks of death lightly. Nobody talks of what it tends to leave behind.

We obsess over death - how to prevent it, how to cope with it, how to be clinical about it. Yes a person dies and we are left with the aftermath - clothes, shoes, pictures, their tea in the cupboard, hair still in the brush. But obviously, a person dies. People are complexes - the most inherent part of death to me is how a person can just end. With Pandora, this sits within the realm of the HC that she is a seer. She must standby and watch the people she loves die twice - once in her head and once in real life. She must watch over her friends and loved ones and grieve them as she lives alongside them. To her, a heart is just a stopwatch.

Evan: He carried on with his journey but made time to be part of mine.

I met an old man who told me that at the end of the day, you do wish you could it all over again. That we are often ungrateful until we lose the thing, then all we want is to get it back. Evan Rosier cherished everything; his sister, his friends, his childhood. But this made him so weary of loss. He was possessive and sometimes cruel. He would do anything to keep what was important to him, even join a blood supremacy cult to keep his best friends and sister safe. When you die, they say you get seven minutes to rewatch the happiest moments. When Evan Rosier dies, he sees Barty and Reg and Pandora.

Barty: You can love something that does not exist anymore. Something that has never existed cannot be loved.

This one is slightly harder to explain. I believe it to be human nature to chase the things that we have only had a taste of. You cannot want something you do not know. Though I do wonder if this is more an act of conditioning than something inherently of nature. To cognise something is to give it a reality, whether this be a thought, an idea or a notion.  Barty Crouch Jr was a waste of potential. 12 OWLs. 4 languages. He could've been whatever he wanted. You can assume he was unsuccessful in fulfilling his potential - unless he wanted to be dead. And who can blame him with a father like that. Barty had to fabricate everything - would lick up his father's approval like a dog until the day he realised none of it actually mattered.

Dorcas: All prior things are made of shards, of tatters. All prior things look different in the daylight.

Past lives are just that. Past, nonexistent. Windows are walls. Shields are not always protective. Dorcas Meadows was hunted and slaughtered by Voldemort himself. She, obviously, was a threat. A smart, cunning, powerful witch who made the Dark Lord himself worry just how successful he'd be if she remained alive. But none of this mattered from the second she hit the floor, heart slowing down, eyes closing. She was not the priest's favorite sacrificial lamb. She wasn't even a sacrifice.

Marlene: One day I will sit in an urn, and I too will be smaller than the day I arrived.

I wrote this about not rushing through life. It was about savoring moments and people and the ephemeral. Marlene was the casanova - wanted by all but touched by few. Her bloodline dies when she dies next to her brother. Filled with potential and life, even the brightest stars will fade away. Sacrifice is often forgotten, drawn over, especially if it isn't grand. Not quite the brightest witch of her generation, nor pretty enough to get the one person she truly wanted.

Mary: I wonder if forgetting is betrayal or if it’s a favour, a privilege of rest.

I was wondering whether remembering people disturbed the process of dying. We don't know of an afterlife or what happens after you die. Does reminiscing drag a soul away from rest? I hold the HC that Mary obliviated herself near and dear. In this way, it's just another person coping with loss. I think because it's so deeply personal, it's very difficult to express in words.

Andromeda: We learn that just because one person escapes the inevitable, the other does not.

I wrote this about Orpheus and Eurydice. It's a story I adore and it's also often misunderstood. This is why it’s a tragedy, and why love often is a tragedy - loss is inevitable. In the case of Orpheus and Eurydice, he loved her enough to try and save her. He loved her so much that he couldn’t. Andromeda is the survivor - survives her upbringing, survives a war, outlives her family. She takes in Teddy even though he's a glaring reminder of her daughter and every moment of a past she tried to outrun.

Narcissa: Love is always a choice, even when we make the wrong one.

Again, this is from me writing about Orpheus and Eurydice. Their story was never about retrieval or righting a wrong. Even if Eurydice had been returned, she was a ghost. This was always a story about saying goodbye. Oh I could lament about Narcissa for days. She is her own greatest tragedy. She was the model child out of her sisters. She lived the ideal trajectory and suffered for it. Obedience and cunning were bred into her. She couldn't save her husband, her house, her sisters or her son. Narcissa lived her life always saying goodbye, wishing she could instead say 'stay'.

Bellatrix: Sometimes, it feels like I have been exiled from my life and no one has thought to tell me.

This was written about nostalgia, and living like a stranger in your own life. It's about the means and ways and things we do to gain some semblance of control back into our lives. Bellatrix has always been a very interesting character to me. She upholds her pure blood upbringing, marries a pure blood and yet she strives for more. She becomes a deatheater and makes herself so valuable to Voldemort, she becomes an intrinsic part of his inner circle. She outshines her husband and sisters - she is the patriarch.

Anon. I hope this answers your question! If you'd like further details on any of these please send me another ask or DM! I'd love to hear your thoughts instead of scribing mine!

[identityflawed]

palpatine drabble

context: a little drabble from my oc fic, repurposed. this takes place shortly after the lawless episode in the clone wars.

cw: implied drug use, implied death... idk what to tag

characters: palpatine, reader

---

The doors to the Chancellor’s public office opened with a well-oiled whir, and you were quickly greeted by deep crimson and all-encompassing gold.

The sun was setting on Coruscant, and weather control had artfully painted clouds across the sky, not obscuring the path of the sun, but burning the edges of the clouds in deep indigos and fleshy pinks. A single, blackened silhouette marred the expanse of vibrant color, sleeves flaring at the shoulders, and ice-white hair lined with aurulence like some sort of halo.

The man before you was as far removed from the angels of Iego as one could be, not that you were aware of it.

“Welcome back, Commander,” the Chancellor said as you crossed the threshold from jutting shadows into sharpened light. “I must offer congratulations on your reinstatement into the Jedi Order. Your hard work has paid off.”

“Dividends for the both of us,” you replied, polite as ever. You sat down in one of two chairs in front of his curving steel desk. 

The Chancellor stood motionless, as if considering the implications of your statement.

“And to think a lone Jedi Padawan could bring us to the brink of ending the war.” The man finally turned, his blue eyes catching the fading sunlight as he returned to his wide-backed chair. “Your Master must be proud.”

You laced your fingers in your lap, examining one of the angular decorations on Palpatine’s otherwise empty desk. “The war isn’t over, Chancellor. Grievous’ capture is…” You gestured loosely with your gloved hands. “A boost in morale, at best. Dooku would’ve been more valuable, but even then…”

The Chancellor studied your impassive expression as you trailed off into silence. His own hands steepled over the desk. He waited for you to finish your train of thought, but you made no motions to. 

Perhaps to any other person, it would seem like you were reserving your thoughts to avoid wasting the Chancellor’s valuable time, or musing openly and had come to the end of your considerations. Palpatine knew better. You was baiting him into asking a question, to permit discussion of a topic that the Council had shut down many moons ago: the implication that Dooku was not the leader of the Separatists, but the second-in-command. The presence of a Master. The name Darth Sidious.

“Grievous will be tried and prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law, I assure you,” Palpatine said, smoothly guiding the conversation in another direction. “There is no denying the horrors that… abomination has wrought upon our Republic.”

“Of that, I have faith,” you murmured, playing with the hem of your robe as you gazed out in the distance. “But he is not the issue. Even the staunchest of Separatists recoil at the tactics he has used to ensure victory. His trial and subsequent execution will bring relief to both sides of the war.”

“A necessary sentiment.”

“From an unnecessary source,” you countered, almost absent-mindedly, as if you weren’t calculating your every word and micro-expression with a professional finesse. “I was hoping for Dooku.”

“As were we all, but I would be hard-pressed to find a single person in the Republic willing to calumniate you over such a point.” The Chancellor smiled in your periphery. “You are the hero of the hour, and perhaps more than that.”

You let the silence stretch before speaking once more. “Perhaps I misunderstood your summons, Chancellor. I thought you gave sufficient commendations at the ceremony earlier today.”

The Chancellor looked somewhere behind you, and a service droid wheeled into the room, a tray of tea balanced over its skeletal fingers. “I wanted to speak to you privately. Eventually, the luster of your successes will fade, and some will begin to question the legitimacy of the cover story that the Jedi Council has conjured for you.” The tray was set on the desk between them. “With particular respect to the Council of Neutral Systems, whose leader you…” He rolled his hand negligently.

“Allegedly murdered, yes."

As the droid poured two cups of tea, the Chancellor eyed you expectantly. “There is video evidence. We managed to lock it down, but…”

Now he trailed off and let the implications speak for themselves. To his well-hidden surprise, you didn’t seem even mildly concerned. Instead, you reached for a small cup of tea and held it close to your chest, appreciating the warmth in the chilly room.

“You're a politician, sir. You should know the truth is often subjective,” you said vaguely. “The Council knows the truth.”

Palpatine took the first sip of the drink, closing his eyes to savor it for a moment. When he opened them again, you had shifted slightly, the hilt of your lightsaber glinting in the crepuscular light. “They have yet to share it with this office, I’m afraid.”

You stared down at the tea – a bloodred liquid, extracted from the pale pink blossoms of Naboo. “Give them time.” You took a tentative sip, your tongue swilling around your mouth. “The real story is not an easy one to process.”

Palpatine thinned his lips. “I will have to determine that for myself.”

You finally met his gaze, your eyes dark as event horizons. “You want me to tell you.” You set down your cup and leaned back in the seat. 

“It would be preferable to get the information from a firsthand source,” the Chancellor responded. “I am all too often ensconced in lies and hyperbole, and for once, it would be more than beneficial for the future of the Republic for me to know what exactly is going on in the galaxy.”

“I don’t believe for a second that you don’t know what’s going on, Your Excellency.” Your voice had no edge, but for the words. You parted your lips to say something else, but the notion seemed to slip from your mind.

Just as quickly, you shook your head, trying to clear the sudden fog that had befallen your senses. The Force seemed to draw away from you, even as you reached for it, clawed at it, seeking an explanation for the sudden shift and recoil. Palpatine stayed silent, statuesque, observing as you blinked rapidly, trying to push to your feet but realizing all too late that something was wrong.

Your vision was swimming, but you managed to lock onto the watery blue eyes of the Chancellor, realization drawing your face tight as they glinted pale gold.

“You.”

[marvelousmagicalaura]

Thoughts on Secret History Part 2

I got too thoughts on Part 2. I'm loving this story too much.

Kelsier is now a Cognitive Shadow, a being who's had his spirit held together. He's been severed from the Physical Realm who can't go back or pass to the Beyond. But he has no real clothes, hair, bodily fluids or senses. Pain comes from Kelsier’s thoughts on what he should be experiencing. It seems that he's more akin to Preservation’s holograms or Ruin’s illusions, than a real human. Does being a Cognitive Shadow mean Kelsier's soul is intermixed with his Cognitive aspect - his thoughts?

If the Cognitive Realm is the Realm of thoughts, what are the dead Scadrians supposed to be when they arrive? Do their souls show up in the Cognitive, a humanoid embodiment of their thoughts, or both?

No wonder Fuzz claimed Ruin has "deep plans." Rust and Ruin. This is far deeper than what the trilogy presented. Ruin wasn’t just using Vin or Sazed’s rubbing. He was manipulating and altering the texts and copperminds of many Terrismen (not just Sazed), whispering to madmen, whispering to Zane. He’s got influence on the Drifter and Elend. I think it’s implied he has influence or interest in the whole crew. Ruin masqueraded as the mist spirit to nudge Vin into distrusting it!

So apparently Ruin isn't death or destruction, he's the god of entropy and slow decay. I guess that makes sense, looking back to his plans. Though with his existence being of winds and storms and waves slowly stopping, of the sun and planet slowly cooling to nothing… you’d think Ruin would have futuresight on Preservation’s level. Plus if he did have futuresight on Preservation's level, I think it would strengthen Ruin and Preservation's arc of opposites engaged in a war of balance. Granted, now I know futuresight is of possibilities and Fuzz couldn’t foresee Kelsier’s method of death as a guaranteed possibility. So idk what’s going on with that lmao.

I wish Sanderson leaned more into the *chaotic* angle of Ruin, or gave us a more nuanced interpretation of chaos. Entropy is disorder or unpredictability, but idk why fantasy writers don't acknowledge that chaos "makes things go." Entropy is replication and metabolism. Entropy is why hot things cool down and cool things heat up, or why gas fills up a chamber and comes out. Entropy makes suns, planets, or the weather slowly build up. Chaos makes humans invent technology and achieve ambitions.

Kelsier's peeks into Ruin and Preservation's essence are so magnificent and add so much context. The reflection of Vin's brief Ascension is beautiful. The Cognitive images of Ruin’s whispers and freedom are really terrifying.

Kelsier became Gollum for sometime 😭

All Men have limits, even the Survivor 😭😭 😭

Drifter is angry Kelsier destroyed the means of interplanetary trade. Okay, understandable. But Drifer is such a dick omg. Kelsier saved the skaa and Terris people! What did you do??? 🤬

I’m guessing the Pits held Ruin’s pool - the liquid that manifested cuz of Scadrial’s creation. But how would Kelsier’s destruction of the atium destroy the pool? It’s not like he destroyed the layout of the Pits.

If the perpendicularities are supposed to be portals between the Physical and Cognitive, and between other worlds, then this means Preservation programmed his perpendicularity into being Ruin’s prison and granting unfathomable Investiture every 1024 years.

Drifter says anything physical falls through the misty floor, so I guess Cognitive Shadows like Spanky must be used to travel through.

It sounds like Drifter needed Kelsier to kill the Lord Ruler or inspire someone to kill him, so he can enter Kredik Shaw and steal a lerasium bead left behind by the Lord Ruler. I’m gonna speculate Rashek left two lerasium beads due to futuresight experienced during his Ascension - during his glimpse of Preservation’s Plan. I think he foresaw that two beads ***might*** be needed for others in the future, while he needed to take nine beads.

Harmony is a liar. He lied about the number of lerasium beads.

Man, the passage about Kel and Marsh’s brotherhood hurts. The Final Empire REALLY screwed up the crew’s chances of having happy childhoods. Or close sibling. Or romances with happy endings 💔

My interpretation is that Fuzz - the mist spirit - the Cognitive holograms - is not Leras. Fuzz is basically a fragile artificial intelligence that remembers the personality of his creator, and is just riding along Leras’ plan. It knows that Leras made a plan, or plans, but lacks the ability to remember them. It also seems to be a small fragment of Leras’ mind that’s mostly driven by the Shard of Preservation’s Investiture. While the Shard wants a new host. He's perceiving and working on the world pretty well, all things considered.

I FEEL VINDICATED! I RUSTING CALLED IT! PRESERVATION MANUEVERED RASHEK INTO BEING THE ASCENDANT! RASHEK WAS RIGHT! ALENDI WAS THE FALSE HERO!

Oh right! Harmony said that Preservation hears the thoughts of those who wear Hemalurgic spikes! Buuuut he's partly a liar cuz Harmony also listened to Wax's thoughts before he put on the earring.

Harmony definitely hears the thoughts of people who don’t wear Hemalurgic spikes, so Preservation would’ve known Rashek’s true thoughts - the heart of a Man - on a level the readers or Alendi aren’t aware of. This would explain why Preservation's futuresight seems so much better than Ruin. But *why* did he maneuver Rashek into becoming the Ascendant? And what does this mean for the implications surrounding Alendi and Kwaan? I think he did this to create the circumstances for the Hero of Ages.

Ruin falls way too short in the chess game. Secret History amps him up a bit but damn Ruin needs some Bene Gesserit tier planning.

Apparently, an Ascendant needs to be Connected to the Well's power. What does that mean?

I know the clues to Vin were the mist spirit. Wasn’t Sazed the “someone else Fuzz tried to get to stop her?” When the mist spirit was messing around in Luthadel.

Now I know Kelsier didn't whisper to Sazed's mind, telling him that Marsh launched rings into his body. My guess is Preservation did *something* to communicate to Sazed.

It turns out Kelsier was the one to stab Elend, guiding Fuzz’s knife! Fuzz could manifest the knife but couldn’t harm Elend because he protects. And yet Leras put the Allomancer plan into motion, which meant making people sick. He put Vin and Rashek into place, who both kill to protect or maintain stability. I don't think Fuzz is a complete representation of Preservation's morality or willingness to kill.

[mxtxfanatic]

tbh, the whole ~~its easy to be kind when youre rich!!!!~~ take makes me feel like some people watched parasite and didnt really understand what it was saying when one of the characters said that same thing about the family they were working for (and idk, maybe theyve never seen that movie and arent thinking about it, but its what immediately comes to my mind when people say that phrase). The rich family wasnt actually nice!! they just didnt place the same emotional weight on certain things because they had so much of them, and therefore thought less about them, etc. But that wasnt supposed to be a line meaning that all rich people are nice because they dont have to worry about surviving, which is how some people seem to feel about class and which drives me nuts!!! its such a lukewarm, incorrect take imo!

(I’ve never seen Parasite, don’t judge 🫣) but I think you’re right, anon, people do mistake niceness for kindness and genuineness. Rich people irl doing things to launder their money and reputations in the eyes of the public is not a sincere display of generosity meant to materially change the conditions of the lower classes. Also, being a celebrity =\= being a hero. On the flip side, if poverty was a condition that made humans more inclined to forsake their morals and hospitality, the human race would have died out a long time ago. You have no further to look for examples of this than when disaster strikes in the world or extreme human rights abuses occur. “Poor people have less opportunities to be heroes,” say that to the people who dive into rip tides to save drowning swimmers or the people digging through the rubble of destroyed buildings to pull out survivors or the people jumping onto subway tracks to save strangers who’ve fallen in. Say that to people who open their homes to hide whole groups of people against state persecution, whether in secret or in plain view of the world. Say that to the history of colonial resistance (of which China has centuries of examples) or slave rebellions. Where were the rich people and their “privilege of kindness” then?

Now let’s put this in context of tgcf. Which institutionally powerful characters, who are not Xie Lian, use their status, money, and power to materially change the conditions of the common people? Xie Lian was out there carrying rain from different parts of the world to relieve Yong’an’s drought while he fought with his father, THE EMPEROR, to provide aid for the refugees. Xie Lian, alone, talked to the refugees about what was happening and walked amongst the people to see what they were suffering through. The only god who helps him is The Rain Master; everyone else focuses on stealing his worshipers behind his back or telling him that human life is not valuable enough to want to save from suffering.

Most of the martial gods ascend from war or prowess, and many of these achievements are covered in blood such that revealing them could (and does for some!) strip them of their godhood. I can’t say much about how the civil gods ascend, though in Ling Wen’s case it also seems based on skill and not so much how they actively help the people. Feng Xin and Mu Qing are the only characters I can think of who don’t follow this pattern, but even they are willing to forsake the common people and lower castes if it means staying within the status quo (all the moments they try to persuade Xie Lian against fighting the Xianle nobility on behalf of the Yong’an refugees or how they try to persecute the ghosts as easy solutions to the story’s mysteries without looking into the abnormalities of each case because “gods can’t be bad so it must be the ghosts!”). And again, the climax of the story has the capital city saved from utter destruction by the power of the community and camaraderie amongst the city’s homeless population (whereas the heavens are saved by the power of unconditional love and Hua Cheng’s complete faith in Xie Lian), all at the cost of… sharing a meal together at the end of the day.

Real life doesn’t adhere to the logic that goodness is a class privilege, and this book doesn’t reproduce that logic either. So once again people are using their biases to interpret messages in the text that simply do not exist.

[slasher-male-wife]

May I please request HCs for Severen what he was like prior to turning? Thanks💜💜💜

Ok so sorry for taking literally forever to get to this. I was working on it then my drafts got really clogged up and I forgot about it. I haven't seen Near Dark for awhile so I'm sorry if this is out of character for him or something. These are kind of short because I haven't seen the movie in awhile so again I'm sorry.

What Severen was like before he turned

Warnings: Talk of neglectful parents, war related trauma briefly, his childhood just really sucked, (maybe underage) drinking (it's the early 1900's so idk anything about their drinking laws), mention of slaughtering animals in a farming context

I like to think he turned after Jessie, so probably around the 1920's. I also like to think that he grew up on a farm like Caleb. But unlike Caleb his parents didn't care where he went. So I'd say he was born around 1900.

He grew up with a lot of siblings because he was born on a farm. I imagine him being one of the older children out of five or six. He had to grow up really fast and help his dad with the farm. He helped slaughter animals at an early age so gore never really bothered him.

His parents were pretty cold and absent to him. They never really showed affection or gave him attention because they had five other children to watch over. I can see him being that really cocky, kind of jackass self with friends while he was going up but not really around other people.

He was shy for most of his childhood, but he grew out of it in his late teen years and started to act how he does in the movie but less intense. I can still see him getting into fights when he was younger. He used to get beat up on a lot until he hit puberty and started to fight back and win.

Because he was alive and around the age for being drafted for WW1 he was super anxious about being drafted. He himself didn't get drafted but friends of his did and seeing them come home with trauma related disorders really messed him up.

He spent as much time away from home as he could. The police probably brought him home on more than one occasion because he was out so late. But his parents never really noticed.

His parents weren't abusive per say, they were more neglectful and just ignored him most of the time. He was sort of close with his siblings but he just spent a lot of time with friends.

He sneaked into bars a lot too. I don't think there were super strict drinking ages at the time but he went from town to town drinking alone or with friends.

His liver is so fucked up because of how much he drank when he was a teenager and in his early 20's. But since he's a vampire now he doesn't have to worry as much about that. But if he wasn't a vampire he would probably have liver failure at like 35.

He got kicked out of the house for coming home drunk too. He'd miss doing chores or sleep in super late so his parents would kick him out for a few days.

He met Jessie at a bar and started to hang out with him more. Eventually Jessie mentioned turning Severen and he agreed so fast. He packed a few things and said goodbye to his siblings before he left. He probably cried but decided leaving this life behind was better for him anyway.

[sleeby-anon]

So I don’t know if what I feel is actual attraction. I may find someone, objectively, attractive, and think about it, but I don’t feel any of the telltale signs of a crush: no sweating, nervousness, elation, idk idk whatever they say a crush is supposed to be. It’s like I get the beginnings of a crush, but it never goes deeper than that. (I mean, I do stutter and get nervous, but that’s the social anxiety I do it with everyone). I can’t imagine myself doing anything romantic with any real people I meet. I do simp for fictional characters, though. heavily.

I remember having “crushes” as a child but I can no longer remember if it was actual attraction. My parents used to say that NO child has crushes, that it’s all a platonic fascination. Can’t have crushes before puberty, that was their idea.

I feel like there’s no real way of answering this without a professional I just wanted to know if this situation feels familiar.

the constant struggle of is it aspec????????? Or is it social anxiety???????

Hmmm, that is a tricky one. I can describe my experience with all of that and see if that helps anon.

When I was like 6/7 years old and people were discovering their crushes, I worried I was falling behind the curve. So I examined my first grade classroom and picked out a boy who was smart, funny, and not too bad on the eyes. (I claimed he was my one and only crush for 6 years without ever acting on it. If you don’t act on it—that probs a sign)

And yeah he was fun to hang around, we talked about Star Wars and minecraft and he showed me his world on pocket edition (back when nether reactors were still a thing)

But at the same time, if I really thought about it—being romantic with him—in real life—the answer was always like: “…I’ll pass actually.”

And while younger kids might say they have crushes —it might be because it’s them trying to figure out feelings and shit—but I can’t tell you if little kids actually get crushes or not.

When I was older I found people that were aesthetically pleasing to look at but their personalities were always kinda “meh.” So I wrote it off as “bland personality”

When I tried going out with a cute and sweet girl I had met—any time I thought about being romantic with her my stomach was nauseous and the inside of my skin felt like sandpaper rubbing against the rest of me. The only thing that seemed to soothe me was that we could be friends first—that’s normal for relationships right?

And I have anxiety—I know what that is like. And it took me a bit to recognize that my anxiety was coming from my identity as aroace—not because it was an irrational fear of getting close to people. (which I also have) it takes a bit of digging to uncover the source of why you are uncomfortable in that situation. Some questions that helped me get to the source were stuff like:

Is it moving too fast? Why does it feel like it’s moving too fast?

We have been talking for months now—why does thinking about them in that context make me uncomfortable?

What would be a reasonable timeline before I would feel comfortable dating? (For most normal circumstances If the answer is any longer then like 6 months is a sign)

And I simp for fictional characters too—(literally look at the amount of shit I write for characters based on one specific content creator I like) but I know that if I were ever actually in the positions with the situations I write about and fantasize in front of me? The way I would be uncomfortable is insane.

If you can’t imagine doing romantic stuff with people then I think that is a pretty good sign you may be on the spectrum.

Take life as it comes anon, and if you still don’t feel sure, I’d recommend finding other aroace a and learning from their experiences.

The sources I can recommend to you are Jaiden Animations (on YouTube) she has a whole video going in-depth about being aroace

I also would recommend getting your hands on Loveless by Alice Oseman (the creator of heartstopper) I cried while reading it it’s such a good explanation and experience of Aromanticsm.

Hope this helps lovely. Wishing you all the support and not-love your way 💚💚

[doyelikehaggis]

"I just feel like there’s a few missed opportunities within their dynamic, and it probably does come down to how Damon was written in that season as well"exactly, idk the big part of damon's character was appreciating even the smallest bits of care and love someone gave him, that's why it's so weird to see him pushing Enzo away every time Enzo did everything for him. (ofc we can twist it, and say that's because Damon was in love with Enzo and it was scaring him, and that's what I chose to do)

You know what, you're totally on point. I just remembered how... surprised? Damon was in season 1 and 2 when Elena was showing him genuine friendship and kindness, but even as cold as he still was back then, he appreciated it and took it very seriously to the point where he felt betrayed when he realized Elena wasn't completely sincere and was "plotting" with Stefan behind his back (I actually feel that's where his own "feelings" for Elena came from partially as well, because she was someone who was brutally honest with him while still showing him kindness and tenderness where he maybe didn't deserve it.) The same with his feelings towards Stefan in early seasons. He came in expecting hostility and hatred, and for the most part he was right, but when Stefan started trying to "mend" their bond, he was surprised and wary but also accepted it quite quickly because he appreciated the extended olive branch. He sometimes disliked Alaric, but he also came back to him every time when he felt lost because he knew he would be there for him.

Actually, people showing Damon even a slight bit of sincere kindness seems to be a huge thing for him as he then proceeds to hold onto those people. I'd never noticed that before but it makes a lot of sense when you take into consideration how all he wanted in his childhood and young adolescence was his father's approval. He joined a war to please him for crying out loud. And I imagine his mother was a... somewhat gentle, soft person in his life who probably showed him a great amount of love before she "died", thus leaving him with a hole that he continuously searched for something to fill it. It makes perfect sense then that he would grasp onto anyone who showed him some sliver of affection and kindness.

So, Damon pushing Enzo away when he showed him unshakeable loyalty and kindness and genuinely wanted to be in his life isn't consistent with his character. Not unless, as you said, we put it into the context that he was scared. Scared that he would lose Enzo again like he once did before. Scared because he cared deeply about Enzo, as he once did for his mother, for Stefan, for Katherine, for Henry even! All people who gave him attention and love and who ended up losing in some way, whether because of himself or because of them choosing to leave. He spent 50 years not feeling anything, and by season 5, he was just getting used to feeling loved and appreciated again, so of course he was scared to get close once again to the person he chose to turn it all off for out of fear that he would do it again. He would be forced to make a decision again between a person he cared deeply for or to not feel anything at all, so he chose to act like he didn't care for him and push him away as a sort of compromise.

That's just my thoughts on it, of course! It's entirely up for interpretation and I'm sure others have different views on Damon's feelings, his character, and his dynamic with Enzo, not to mention how it was affected by his past relationships with the people closest to him..

But it would've been nice to have that softer version of Damon who Enzo got to know in the cells. The one that believed Elena and Stefan even though he probably should've known better simply because they were kind to him. The one who would never have let Enzo out of his sight, never mind pushed him away after getting him back because he wasn't going to lose another person and he truly hadn't experienced such persistent affection, loyalty and kindness from someone in a while.

[straighttohellbuddy]

lost my mind in a wedding gown {Dream}

Summary: Now everyone knows. Now everyone has an opinion. Sometimes you just want to make impulsive decisions with the one you love because you love them, without worrying what the world will think.

A/N: 5431 words. sickeningly fluffy. seriously, it gets so sweet its kind of gross. i love this universe, and yes there will be a part 4, which will be the final part. please let me know what you think. idk how i feel abt this fic, please gimme feedback if u have any :)

Warnings: heavily implied nsfw.

{ Idiots-To-Lovers 'verse } | { 3 / 4 }

How did you get here? In the grand scheme of your life, what moments lead to here, to standing in Dream and Sapnap's kitchen at three in the morning in your pyjamas, frozen where you'd been looking through the cupboards for something to snack on. Sapnap stood in his doorway, also dead still, gaze locked with yours, his monitors alight behind him where he was still streaming.

"Do you actually live here?" He asks, finally breaking the silence, bewildered by the whole situation with exhausted amusement heavy in his voice, "why are you in my cupboard?"

"There's no labels," you pointed out, slowly closing the cupboard again, "what are you playing?"

And while you'd only come out to grab a snack because you couldn't sleep, you end up joining Sapnap for the end of his stream, chattering away with him as he played Valorant.

"I'm not gonna say some gross, cutesy shit on Sapnap's stream-" you said around a yawn while chat was asking why you were up at this hour.

"Glad to hear you've learned some self control," he smirked, focused on the game in front of him as you leaned on the arm of his chair, your head on his shoulder.

"I was refraining for their sake, not yours," you sniped back with a grin of your own, which had him laughing, "I was too tired to be a menace about thirty seconds ago but I feel a burst of energy coming on."

"Hey, don't be all cute and gross and torture my chat just to get back at me," he warned, "that's violates the Geneva Conventions you know." A long pause follows, and for the barest moment he's worried that he's genuinely upset you in your tired state, and he casts a glance at you, trying to gauge your reaction, only to see your face all scrunched up in thought.

"You okay there?"

"I don't wanna get cancelled because people clip that out of context and think I commit war crimes," you huffed after a moment, realising too late that since you'd spoken it into existence, people were almost definitely going to start jokingly cancelling you for war crimes. Sapnap, on the other hand, who hadn't been expected anything like that response, barks a laugh, grinning from ear to ear.

"Anyway," you say loudly, "Dream's been editing for the past few hours and I didn't want to distract him while he was in the zone, but I..." you made a hesitant hum in the back of your throat, turning to press your forehead against Sapnap's shoulder, even if he didn't have a facecam on, you felt as though you needed to hide your embarrassment, "I was having trouble sleeping alone, okay?"

"So you try and steal my food and decided to bother me?" He says, tone holding nothing but affection for you, thankfully deciding not to tease you for your sappier admission.

"Naturally," you grin, faint embarrassment alleviated, moving your head back to rest on his shoulder as you watched him play.

"You're more of a cat than Patches sometimes."

As if to prove his point, you reach out and swipe at the empty water bottle at the edge of his desk, knocking it to the ground, grinning from ear to ear.

With the stream, however, there's confusion online over the next few days, casual observers coming out of the woodworks wondering when you'd moved in with the boys. Many of your followers corrected them kindly, but it had still sparked something in your mind, an idea, a concept you were hesitant to bring up.

You haven't been keeping count, persay, but you and Dream had been together for more than a few months now, had been close friends for years before that, and as like Sapnap liked to point out whenever he was in a petty mood, you did practically live with them already.

Still nervous when you finally bring it up, you're met with a grin, with a laugh from your boyfriend as he points out that you've been paying rent on a place you're pretty much using as storage, which was dumb when it's not like their house is small, it's not like there's not room for you. Heart beating in your throat, you realise he's agreeing, something in his eyes saying we should have done this sooner.

And you're quiet about it online until it's all said and done. Going radio silent for the week in which you're moving, you still don't quite believe it's really happening. There's a moment where you're standing in your kitchen, taping up one of the final boxes full of your belongings, while you can hear Dream and Sapnap trying to logistically work out how they were going to get your sofa through your door and into the elevator, when you find yourself overwhelmed with love and appreciation for them. This was really happening, your life was moving forward; you're actually moving in with your best friends, one of whom happens to be your boyfriend. Part of you had never expected to get here.

"I think I had a dream like this once," you tell them with a slight frown, "weird," and you leave it at that. You don't tell them that they'd broken your sofa trying to fit it through the door in your dream. It didn't matter now. Perhaps you'd been afraid that moving meant changing who you were to fit in with them, though now you see that couldn't be further from the truth.

"Now it's your turn, Gogy," you can't help the contented little sigh that escapes you as you flop back onto your sofa, gazing up at the roof of your new-but-familiar bedroom you now officially shared with Dream. George, giving you a fond smile through the screen of your phone, jokingly asks if there's even room for him, "a whole spare room is waiting for you," you assured. There's something fond in his smile, thinking aloud about how long it would be until he's properly able to come over and join the three of you. Soon, is the only conclusion he can come to, soon, but even so, it doesn't feel soon enough.

However, until George does arrive, you'd been able to commandeer the spare room, that had originally just been for storage, for your gaming set up while you looked into nearby cheap office spaces.

"Yeah, I moved some thing in my background," you gave a little chuckle at the start of your first stream after your move, to which the chat was up in arms with confusion.

[THE WHOLE BATHROOM DOOR? YOU MOVED THE WHOLE BATHROOM DOOR???????] one donated, which had you cackling with laughter, not able to keep up the ruse for the first five minutes of being live. As if on cue, however, before you can even answer them, the door opens.

"How the tables turn; now I can bother you when I'm bored and you're streaming," Sapnap told you, and you don't even have to look at your screen to know that chat is already connecting the dots.

"Hey, that's my job," Dream shouts from the living room.

"You do that anyways," Sapnap rolls his eyes with a good-natured amusement, "but now they've got a facecam, you guys can't be gross on their streams anymore." There's a beat of silence, before both yourself and Dream point out that you'd just turn off or cover your camera for him.

"You guys are the worst," he tells you both, matter-of-factly as he strides into the spare room and rests his chin on the top of your head, looking at your set up and giving a wave to your camera. Chat spams his name, excited, while all you can do is roll your eyes, trying to fight back your own grin.

"You know my menacing of you and your streams is just gonna get worse now that I officially live here, right?"

"I'm aware, I've made my peace with it," his grin is all teeth and he gives you a firm pet on the head before he leaves, citing that there's a grace period of one stream after moving in before he starts to bother you properly in return.

It's not as if much changes, you'd practically already been living there after all, now your knicknacks were scattered about the house, and your clothes joined Dream's in his wardrobe, and there was something about the sense of home that filled you whenever you would wake up to light streaming through the window above you, and Dream's arm curled around you.

"You live here now," is what he says, voice a raspy whisper, still half asleep, the first time he catches sight of you smiling, almost disbelievingly, at him in the morning light. His eyes are barely cracked open, face half-pressed into the pillow, but there's a grin on his lips that is both sleepy and happy, and you curl up close to him, kissing him gently on the nose.

"I live here now," you murmur back, and tuck yourself close to him, closing your eyes but unable to stop smiling as you let yourself drift back off.

Our room. Our apartment. The phrases make you giddy every time you think of them, every time you say them, even on stream, which just endears you further to your audience, if that was even possible. Unfortunately, on the other hand -

"It's not- can you guys not speculate about what is and isn't too fast in my personal relationships?" Dream huffed an irate breath through his nose as he tried to focus on what he had be building in Minecraft, "I don't know how long you've been here, but here's a short timeline; we've been together for months, and have been super fucking close for years before that -" his phone buzzes, interrupting him.

[you okay babe?] You've messaged from the other room. Taking a moment, he takes a deep breath to try and placate his irritation at chat being weird and invasive. There is something that grows warm in his chest, however, that you're still watching him stream but not wanting to interrupt despite your proximity.

[can you come in here?] he replies quickly, and in moments, you're quietly opening the door, crossing to him without a word, pressing a warm kiss to his cheek. Even that is enough to ease the tense set of his shoulders; you stay quiet, don't make your presence known, but you remain in the room, sitting cross-legged by his chair with your forehead braced against his knee as you scrolled through your social media feeds. Occasionally he'd gently place his hand on your head, a silent moment of contact and thanks, and in turn you'd give the faintest hum of acknowledgement, and press a quick kiss to his knee.

Of course you're also getting similar comments, though your fans are surprised at the restraint you'd been showing. Dream's outburst on stream seemed out of character for someone who usually puts far more thought into how he responds to his audience; you, however, are a well documented creature of impulse.

"You should really pay me to be your PR team," Sapnap jokes when the topic comes up during an impromptu Discord Podcast; Dream and George's laughter fills the call for a few moments, but none of you seem inclined to disagree.

"You're my impulse control, there's a difference," you snort a laugh of your own, tucked up in your gaming chair on the other side of the apartment, "and only when it comes to Twitter."

"Should I be offended that you run your potentially controversial tweets past Sap before you run them past me?" Dream jokes, to which Sapnap himself was quick to shut him down.

"No, because you would have absolutely okayed 'just say you wish you were me and move on' they almost tweeted last week -"

"Yeah because it's true," Dream fired back, and you felt a warm and vaguely selfish pride bloom in your chest.

"What was it in regards to?" George asks, still half-laughing.

"Does it matter?" Both you and Dream and answer at the same time, much to your collective delight, while the other two groaned.

"You guys make sense together but that is not a compliment," George cackles, and you very kindly tell him to fuck off, "love you too, Y/N," he coos.

"The minute you land in the US it is on sight, Goggy," you warn him, though the fondness in your voice betrays your aggressive intent; you feel his absence in the moments you feel the most affection for him. There's no doubt in your mind that he'd fit easily into your life, and into this home, just as you had.

Living with Dream and Sapnap, for the record, is actually easy. You'd been worried, considering your sometimes scatter-brained nature, but if there's something that requires a reminder, or some sort of problem, they talk about it. Actually talk. It's... refreshing. It's somehow better than you'd been expecting. Communicating, huh, who would have guessed. To be fair, as everyone liked to point out, you'd practically been living there before it had become official anyways, so it really shouldn't have been a surprise that you'd fit so seamlessly into life in the spacious apartment.

Though your impulsive nature still sometimes got the better of you.

"Wanna go somewhere."

"Are you asking me or telling me?" Dream looks away from his monitor for a moment to where you're laying on the floor of his office, eyes closed and arms flopped out to the sides.

"Both?"

You're bored, an itch between your shoulder blades that isn't really there. It's a discomfort you can't shift, like you're going stir crazy. It's been a month, and it's been great, but sometimes you just need a change of scenery.

"People have been asking me to visit them and I keep thinking about it, but I kind of just want to... go somewhere. Without having to make content, you know?" Then, cracking your eyes open for a moment, you look to where he's gazing down at you with slight confusion, "you don't have to come, I just wanted to keep you up to date with where my head's at," you tell him, "in case I do just take off. Run to California for a few days."

"Run?" He gives a faint smile.

"It's only a bit further than my old apartment," your lips stretch into an amused smile, and he huffs a faint, disbelieving laugh.

"Don't run to LA."

"Only because you asked nicely," you snorted, though there was something genuine and fond in your eyes. A question, an invitation; Dream's smile grows wider.

"Road trip?"

Something in your heart lights up at the suggestion. You've never been more quick to agree.

The morning you leave for LA, Sapnap tweets out a video he had taken as he was seeing you and Dream off, with the caption [roseduo decidedly not taking the braincell on their vacation. good luck.].

The video itself is of Sapnap's face as he tells Dream specifically to not do anything stupid while you were gone.

"Too late, my dude," comes your instinctual response, and there's a moment in which his entire expression reads exasperation, right before he flips the camera to catch you using both thumbs to point at yourself in the passenger seat, while the driver's side is empty. Then after a beat, as the boot of the car slams and Dream's laughter can be heard, you deflate with faint embarrassment, as if your brain has caught up with what you've said without thinking, and you bury your face in your hands with a groan. The camera flips back around, but now Sapnap is trying to hold in laughter of his own.

"That tracks, have a good one, guys," and the video ends.

You'd announced your vacation as more of a two-week hiatus from Twitch and YouTube, but hadn't given much more information beyond that, if only to preserve some form of privacy. The first two days of your trip, you even keep yourself off of Twitter, only going on Discord to message close friends; it's the freest you've felt in a very long time.

The tail-end of Summer is a glorious time for a road-trip, you decide, windows down and warm air whipping past; all that matters is this single moment, the way you look over to see Dream singing along to the radio beside you.

You'd spent so long adoring him from afar, only to find out just how close he really was; when you think too hard about it, it all starts to overwhelm you. How had you made it here? How was this your life?

He glances over to you; you've gone quiet, he's asking if you're okay. You look back out the window, soaking in the moment as best you can.

"I had a dream like this once;" you tell him over the radio, the noise of the wind whistling past, "pretty sunset and everything," right before the car crashed; you leave that last part out. Perhaps it had been you worrying about moving too fast. Perhaps you were terrified that this good thing would end suddenly, and go up in flames. But Dream rests his hand on your thigh and gives it a faint squeeze; he tells you he loves you, easy and genuine, and you tell him you love him too, wearing a bright smile as excited butterflies fluttered around in your stomach. You turn up the music.

But still, you can't shake the thought that everyone else seems to be voicing, focused on it in a way you hadn't anticipated. Chancing a look at Twitter, you find yourself frowning as you sit cross-legged on your hotel bed for the night.

"I'm tired of being told I'm insufferable," it's the most serious you've been in a long while. Dream, stretched out on his side beside you, looks up from his own phone, propping his head up with his hand, assuring you that he doesn't think you're insufferable. Huffing with frustration, you lay back beside him, looking up at the ceiling. Turning to his, your expression is forlorn, "I wanna be nice to you online without being called gross; everyone else is weird about us now, and I miss..." scrunching up your expression, you look away, even now as a faint embarrassment hums through you, "I miss being gross and cute with you and not being treated like a fucking criminal for it."

"We're adults," you huffed, right as Dream curled an arm around your middle, pulling you closer, "we're allowed to be in love," though as you say this, you remember reading through the comments of the video Sapnap had posted several days earlier, "we're allowed to fuck, you know?"

"I am very aware," you can hear that he's holding back laughter, which, upon reflecting on the words that you'd spat with such vitriol, you can't help but laugh yourself.

"I'm tired of everyone else thinking they know better than us," his voice, as he agrees, is quiet and warm. Carefully, he shifts until he's looking down at you, an arm braced either side of you. Just the sight of him like this has your anger fading fast. You reach up to gently take hold of his cheek, "I knew you'd be part of the rest of my life one way or another from about," he considered for a moment, crease appearing above his brow as he remembered, "the third time I spoke to you? Maybe?"

"The rest of your life?" Voice softly awed, you're surprised when a blush begins to creep up his cheeks beneath your hand.

"Something like that," he mumbled, "I can't remember why, but I was talking about how I was waiting to hear back about these tryouts I'd been at, football back when we were all in high school, and you didn't even know me, but you called me a man of many talents, and then did the single most impressive burp I'd heard to that day, before you said that they'd be stupid to not put me on the team," his face scrunches up as he appears to be recalling your exact wording, still amused by the details even now.

"You remember that?" You asked, voice and smile both full of affection as you leaned up to meet him, kissing him gently as a warmth, a fondness spreads throughout your chest.

"Of course I remember that," Dream exhales a little breathlessly, laying back out beside you; when you look at him, there's that crease in his brow again, that faint irritation that you know is never directed at you, "it's what pisses me off about people saying we're moving too fast; I've loved you either platonically or romantically for years, at this point I'm pretty sure I'm making up for lost time." With that, you press your face into his shoulder, love and adoration blossoming so bright within you you're not sure how you're managing to contain it all.

"You romantic motherfucker," you mumbled, all kinds of abashed as the tension broke, and his fond laughter lit up the room, "I felt like the biggest dork in the world, and there you were, a potential footballer, getting roasted by George and Sap in Minecraft on an almost daily basis. I could not get a read on you, I just thought you..." pressing your lips together for a moment, you lifted your face to rest your chin on his shoulder; like this, when he turns to you, you're almost nose to nose. It's clear that he's intrigued by your early impression of him, "I was a weird teenager, Dream."

"I know, I was there," he smirked in an attempt to subdue his laughter.

"And you were still so fucking cool and nice; I had such a crush on you, man."

"And how'd that work out for you?" He teased, however your own words had triggered a realisation in the back of your mind, and your whole expression lights up with shock as you sit bolt upright.

"How have I been deadass in love with you for years without realising?!"

The abruptness has Dream bursting out into laughter, endeared with how thoroughly you're cursing your past self, though as he sits up properly, gently holding your cheek with one hand, his amusement softens to a gentle fondness at the sight of apology in your eyes.

"Probably the same as what happened with me; became kind of a constant truth that you ended up forgetting about it; we were kids, it's not like we knew how to properly deal with feelings like that, they just... were. And we're friends, so a lot of that love was platonic too, the same way we love George or Sap, you know?" And it's strange to hear him so concisely put into words the indescribable things you're feeling.

"Sounds like you've thought about this a lot," you muse, and to your surprise, his smile turns a little sharper, a little self deprecating even.

"Yeah, well I saw one of the stops on our trip and had a stupid, impulsive thought," he shrugged.

"You know I love stupid, impulsive thoughts," you raised your eyebrows, already invested.

"It's possibly too stupid. Possibly. It seems like a terrible idea, maybe even a little spiteful," he warned, though he's already pulling out his phone. You sit a little straighter, every word he's saying only serving to entice you further, "you know where we're staying on Friday?"

"Nevada?" You frown for a moment, and he waits for it to hit you. A moment passes, then - oh!

"Do you wanna get married in Vegas?!" You hissed with barely concealed glee at the suggestion, clutching tightly at his free hand. It was absolutely an impulsive, stupid, terrible, and spiteful idea; of course you're already in.

"I'm not saying we should get married in Vegas, but also..." he too was trying and failing to contain his excitement at the suggestion, though he did attempt to school his expression into something more serious, "one, and most importantly, I love you and I have for... you know, as we've just talked about, a very long time, but two, I do think it would be very funny to get married in Vegas." He's actively giggling; you've pretty sure you've never been more in love than in this moment.

"One, yes, obviously I love you so fucking much, but also, two, you're right, it would be hilarious," you're nodding emphatically, beaming from ear to ear. Your lips on his are enthusiastic and messy, full of joy and delight, and you find yourself babbling about how perhaps one of you should officially -

"Marry me? I mean, will you -" he's stumbling over his words but can't stop grinning, and you're pushing him back against the bed, kissing yes across his jaw, down the column of his throat, though he's quick to join you back in the moment, pulling your shirt over your head.

There's a giddiness that accompanies the next few days of the trip, a smile that doesn't leave either of your faces. As the days pass and you put more thought into it, you realise your list of reasons as to why this is actually a bad idea grows shorter and shorter. The initial exhilaration of the idea, of the proposal, has worn off, but you're still excited rather than at all hesitant. His words play on your mind more than the thousands of other comments you've received before; you've been in love with him in one way or another for almost as long as you've known him. This isn't too fast, if anything this is making up for lost time.

Somehow you manage to keep quiet about it, even to close friends. For all that they care, you know they don't understand, don't see everything leading up to this moment, they'd try to talk you out of it. Your reputation as a creature of impulse had given you the reputation of being rather thoughtless, enough so that even those close to you forgot that that wasn't the whole truth. Except you never felt like that around Dream. Impulsive, yes; genuinely stupid? No, despite what many liked to believe.

"You still down for this?" The day of the wedding, you find yourselves in a jewellery store, perusing their selection of wedding rings. When he asks this, sincerity in his voice, you turn to him without hesitation, leaning in and kissing him softly.

"I've put a lot of serious thought into it, and though teenage me might be surprised that we're getting married in Vegas, I think somehow they always knew that you'd be in..." you swallowed hard as you looked him in the eyes, overwhelmed at your own sappiness, voice going soft as you correct yourself, "that you'd be my future." The salesman very kindly gives the pair of you space as Dream pulls you close to him.

The ceremony is exactly as cheesy as Hollywood had lead you to believe, much to your delight, though somehow that doesn't detract from the moment you both say 'I do'.

The bed in your hotel is heart-shaped, covered in rose petals, the two of you had spared no expense or trope. At least you make good use of it. And the sofa. And shower. And several other spots in the expensive and beautiful and aptly named Honeymoon Suite. You get your money's worth.

"I think this means LA is our honeymoon," Dream muses over a delicious room-service breakfast the following morning. With a faint huff of laughter, you realise he's right. You've still got over a week left of your vacation, though since you were self employed, you could always take a few more days, if you'd really like to luxuriate in LA.

"Dude, we're married," you mutter with a faint grin from where you're lazing back on the bed with only the sheets for modesty, gazing at him in the morning light.

"We're so married," he agrees, leaning back, away from his tray of food, to kiss you sweetly.

"I kind of don't want to tell anyone," voice soft, you can't help but give a contented little sigh, "not even any of our friends, not until we get back to Florida."

"Just us," he agreed faintly, grinning against your lips as his hands find your bare skin beneath the sheets.

As far as anyone else is concerned, you and Dream took a vacation. He takes photos of you lit by sunset for you to post online - "Wait could you see the ring in that shot? I don't wanna take it off, I'll just put my hand behind my back or something." - and the two of you continue to bully each other on Twitter, and interact with your friends and fans like nothing of real note has happened.

There was paperwork you'd have to fill out, red tape and legalities that come with marriage, but as you're speeding down the highway, you look over and see his hands on the wheel, his ring understated and perfect on his finger.

The world could call you insufferable for being in love, you are the happiest you've ever been. The world could say anything they liked about you, you wouldn't care. Through sheer, dumb luck you'd finally acted on your feelings for each other all those months ago, and you don't think things could have worked out better.

At home, Sapnap hugs you both tightly the minute you step through the door, asking how the trip went. You and Dream had spent so much time theorizing how to break the news, but all of that seemed to have left your heads at his questions. Looking at your now-husband, you raise your eyebrows, while your housemate looks between the two of you with mounting apprehension. Dream nods for you to take the lead. There's that giddiness again, starting in your chest, every time you think about your reality -

"We got married," you're trying not to actively show how overjoyed the single sentence makes you feel, especially not when Sapnap looks like he doesn't quite believe you, blinking rapidly as he looks sharply to Dream for some sort of clarification.

"Legally and everything," and Dream holds up his left hand, an action which you mirror. It takes several seconds before Sapnap's eyes seem to bug out of his head.

"For real?!" And thankfully, he sounds delighted, pulling you both in for another, tighter hug this time when you confirm, again. "Of course- driving through Vegas, of course -" he's rambling, stepping back with a wide, proud smile, "guys," he enthuses. Something about his reaction had you breathing a sigh of relief; you'd been so worried that he'd reprimand you, not trust either of you to have thought this through. But you find yourself remember that he has known you both as long as you'd known each other, he and George had known the two of you had feelings for each other before either you or Dream did, part of him must have known this was coming.

He's a little smug to know that he's the first person either of you had told, though as soon as you get to your room, you and Dream call George to give him the news. His reaction, just as Sapnap's was, was full of pride and joy for you both.

Tomorrow, the paperwork would begin, and you would get back to creating content, but this afternoon, you unpack and unwind from somehow the biggest two weeks of your life, kicking the door closed when you're finally done.

Sitting on his bed by the window you can't help but grin out at the sunrise, soaking up the moment you find yourself in. Dream sprawls out beside you, on his side with his head propped up, something adoring in his gaze.

"I had a dream like this once," you tell him faintly, stretching out, flopping on your back on his bed, the afternoon golden where it pours through the window from the outside world. Reaching up, the gold wedding band glints in the sunlight from it's place on your finger. Beside you, Dream reaches out into the sunlight, his hand by yours, his gold ring being your perfect match; he makes a noise of interest in the back of his throat, and you lower your hand to your chest as you turn to look at him, your smirk sharp, "yeah, we were wearing less clothes."

{finale: don't think i'll ever get enough}

[lunaastoir]

fluff/relationships w the liyue crew

characters included: xiao, childe, beidou, and zhongli

ik i forgot ningguang i promise i’ll include her in part 2, i just didn’t have time :(

all x a gn! reader 

my liyue babies :,) ft. ningguang in spirit

an: i was listening to my soft playlist (more like listening to cupid’s chokehold on repeat, no i am not basic 🔪) and i thought some fluff headcanons would be cute w these sweet people

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

xiao

ok so no surprise that he hates liyue harbor

he hates anything w a lot of people in it so he prefers to stay at wangshu inn tyvm

but by contrast, you love liyue harbor sm (it’s gorgeous i mean c’mON)

you go there often to retrieve your commissions in order to stay closer to xiao (liyue harbor is closer than mondstadt he argues but you’re well aware that they’re both equally far away)

so if anyone asked, xiao would absolutely refuse to go to the harbor like i hate people??? why would you even ask???

but,,,he’s so sOFT for you

if you asked??? he would agree in a heartbeat

but since he’s >:( angsty boy, he makes you think that he won’t go even when he’s already decided that he’s coming w you

he puts up the “if you so require, then i guess i will assist you with your travels in liyue harbor” but in reality he would definitely have said yes even without the almond tofu

while he hates the harbor, he thinks that with you anything is bearable :,) simp

you take him to see xinyan to vibe w her music and you can tell he really enjoys it

even tho he’s like 🕴 the entire time, you see the softer look on his face and the very slight smile on his lips as he listens to the music and watches the crowd

so so so cute very soft for him

i do see him as a subtly touchy person in public like brushing the hair off your face, swiping his thumb across your cheek, or gently pulling your hair back when you have a plate of food in your hands 

the type to link your pinkies together - he claims it’s so you don’t get lost but yk better 

after the concert is done you take him to that one waypoint near mt. tianheng and the both of you just watch the city lights and the way they reflect beautifully on the water surrounding the harbor 

personal headcanon that xiao absolutely loves stargazing since he believes the stars are the one true constant in his life especially since he’s experienced so much loss (basically they’ll never leave him god i hate myself why do i make everything SAD)

mini headcanon off of that - he doesn’t stargaze with people,,, like ever 

it’s something he loves to do alone so the fact that he lets you stargaze w him and even allows you to shift your head onto his lap while you watch the sky is a huge deal 

he loves it when you softly whisper abt how your day was or something you saw that made you laugh 

he just loves hearing your voice, it automatically calms the voices in his head 

you absolutely ADORE when he has flowers in his hair especially cecilias (cecillias? ceccillias? idfk) and you make a point whenever you go to mondstadt to pick a fresh batch of cecilias just for xiao while enlisting the help of your favorite bard  

these soft moments on the mountain are usually when you’ll sweetly tuck in a flower or two in his hair while laughing 

he’ll blush fiercely while looking away but will tuck the cecilias in securely as you’re unable to do so due to the position you’re in on his lap

all in all - this was not meant to come out as a date idea but we’re going w it 

this is so cute xiao pls let me put flowers in your hair sweet boy <3

childe

god, loml, my favorite war criminal after eren yeager 

there’s never a dull moment w this man - if you wanted peace and quiet, why the hell are you dating him bestie???

is the type of person to yell out “Y/N, i can’t believe i ran into you here!” if he sees you somewhere even tho you explicitly told him you were going to be here in the morning (ik you have a good memory ajax don’t lie to me 😐)

i don’t see him as being obnoxious w pda unlike someone else kaeya but he would definitely participate (think: handholding, cheek kisses, an arm around your shoulders)

loves it when he comes home and sees you in an apron cooking 

domesticity just makes his heart melt so you can be sure that your face will be peppered w a lot of kisses afterwards <3 

absolutely ADORES it when you trace his scars absentmindedly when you’re lying down or even when you’re having dinner in public  

he’s been far from his family for so long that small acts of mindless affection like this really make his heart happy 

you have him drunk on your love luv haha see what i did there 

he will let you put makeup on him. no i do not take criticism ⛄️

he already has on lowkey thick eyeliner,,, don’t be shy put some more bestie 

he will shamelessly go out in public w whatever you made him wear - doesn’t really give a shit even tho he has a reputation to maintain 

speaking of reputation,,, yk his mask? yeah that one - the red hair accessory that he has on his head

well on the mask, he attached a little charm the both of you got together on your first date during lantern rite 

it’s this adorable fox that we all shamelessly kill for meat and he placed it so it anchored to the side of his mask so when he fights it isn’t a nuisance or anything (does that make sense??? i hope it does) 

his subordinates notice and while they’re stoic around childe, behind closed doors they do whisper abt the mysterious person who’s captured his heart 

not so mysterious anymore when they literally see him cling onto you during his daily patrol around the harbor 💀

it’s ok tho he’s lucky he’s cute 

bestie,,, pls give him a neck massage 

i just KNOW he’s tense there idk something abt the way he carries himself just screams “my neck hurts so bad someone pls help me i would ask but my pride literally will not let me”

so give him a neck massage :) don’t worry tho he’ll definitely return the favor and then some

LOVES TICKLE FIGHTS 

he’s obsessed w them,,, it’s just the faces you make??? he can’t get enough 

he loves seeing the pure joy and the brief fear (he’s kind of a sadist) in your eyes before he attacks you w those damned hands 

it reminds him a lot of simpler times w his siblings and he’s happy he brings you joy and makes you forget your worries - at least for a little while 

all in all, he’s a good boy and no i will not tolerate childe slander 🔪 kaeya slander tho 😏

beidou

you pulled beidou??? wow everyone’s jealous (pulled as in literally from the banner and in this context but no i do not have beidou and no i definitely do not want to talk abt it)

god made beidou and zhongli just so all of us could have a sexuality crisis 

anyways, being w her is hard i will not lie 

not bc she isn’t a capable lover - no, quite the contrary 

she’s an amazing partner but the problem here lies in the fact that she’s almost never on land 

it’s hard working a long distance relationship but y’all love each other so it works out :,) 

when she is physically present however, expect to never be bored 

she’ll quietly fix the wrinkles on your shirt or fiddle with your fingers in her hands while she recounts her adventures out on sea 

she sometimes gets worried she bores you, however the way your eyes light up every time she tells a tale always reassures her otherwise

definitely the type to let you use her claymore if you want to learn 

she’ll provide useful tips as she tucks her hands into your sides gently, positioning you correctly so you don’t hurt yourself 

miss girl is an AMAZING cook 

i just know she cooks the best meals - i mean she’s friends w xiangling after all 

whenever she comes home from a voyage she’ll always insist on making something for you even if she’s abt to pass out 

pls tuck her into bed and promise her that she can make you something in the morning <3 the poor woman needs rest 

brings you back trinkets but they’re actually very practical 

she knows you won’t have much use for a simple charm (not that there’s anything wrong w that) but she believes you’ll like something practical more so she might get you a new engraved knife from the most recent place she’s been to 

definitely the type to surprise you when she docks 

i can imagine her anchoring her ship out a little ways from liyue harbor and rowing to the dock in order to make sure you aren’t alerted of her presence (i’m sorry the mental picture this made in my mind is SENDING ME INTO ORBIT but she means well i love you)

will take you to remote spots she’s found in her travels through liyue 

for example - the little heart shaped island and the island quest (?) that you had to use kaeya the bridge maker for in order to get to im sorry i’ll stop w the kaeya slander

she’ll get you seashell bracelets or necklaces idk why but she gives me those vIBES 

they’re super nice ones too, only the highest quality for you 

yes she’s a bruh girl but i also see her as someone who would enjoy intimate moments like watching the sunset or something 

“yo wanna catch the sunset, i heard it looks sick from the jade chamber” said before ahem it yk fell from the sky

kasdjksfashfjsahf yes ofc i would love to catch the sunset w you pls come home luv

anyways, she is a woman i would give the world for 

zhongli

ok gimme a sec i need to get my gentleman mode on 

this man,,, THIS MAN 

everything w him is so soft like your entire eXISTENCE w him could go in a museum it’s that beautiful 

in the morning when he visits you, he always brings you a cup of your favorite tea and a bouquet of glaze lilies he got from madame ping

holds the door for you, pushes the chair out for you, uses a napkin and brushes sauce off your lips when you’re eating - you name something sweet, he’s done it

secretly loves it when you fuss over him 

he doesn’t like to fight but say he encountered a group of hillichurls he couldn’t avoid and promptly defeated them but ended up tearing a part of his tux(?) (is it a tux? i could not tell you)

not that big of a deal, i mean it’s a scratch, he’s a 6,000 year old god, he’s dealt w much worse 

but seeing the worried crease in your brows as you usher him to sit at the table while quickly grabbing antiseptic to clean his wound

“it’s just a scratch, my dear. do not worry i’ve dealt with much worse.”

you quietly protest abt how “yes zhongli, i understand you’re an archon and have gotten worse injuries but i’m worried about infection just please let me take care of you ok? <3″ 

when you say that he feels weird emotions,,, wdym take care of him? 

he’s always taken care of himself or been expected to take care of others as the former ruling deity of liyue so having someone else genuinely worry abt his wellbeing creates a warm feeling in his chest 

he strikes me as the type to knit you something??? idk maybe it’s the grandpa vibes but i headcanon that he would knit you a scarf for the colder weather, it’s cute 

in the privacy of your home, he really likes picking you up

he loves it when you wrap your legs around his middle while he gets up to go do the dishes or smthg 

domesticity go brrrr

if you’re into making flower crowns, he would totally have you on his lap and wordlessly hand you a glaze lily whenever you expectantly hold your hand out while weaving the flowers together 

he expects you to make the crown for yourself but when you place the crown on his head and it fits perfectly while simultaneously tucking a glaze lily behind your ear, he looks at you dumbstruck 

his mouth parts open in awe and it’s quite literally the cutest thing

you’ve broken him 

thinks it’s the sweetest thing - will keep it on his head for the whole day 

he’ll even put it in water before he sleeps so it won’t wilt and he can wear it the next day <3 

scenic picnics!! scenic picnics!! 

the type to take you to the nicest spots in liyue to chat abt the history of the land w you over a cup of tea and your favorite food (whatever you like, he doesn’t mind)

recounts the people he’s met in his long life before finishing off by saying you’re by far the best person he’s met 

zhongli strangles lovingly come home soon 

thanks for reading! if you have any requests don’t hesitate to send them in <3 

[makeste]

BnHA Chapter 311: Hand Gun

Previously on BnHA: Horikoshi was all “thinkin’ about dropping in some woke analogies of the very real and very presently relevant issue of racial profiling idk what do you guys think” and then shrugged and did it without waiting for an answer, and ngl it was a bit sudden, but I’m here for it. All Might was all “DEKU YOU NEED TO EAT” and Deku was all “OKAY” and took his hero bento and went to go stand dramatically on a tower in the rain whilst having some highly anticipated Vestige flashbacks. OFA II was all, “sup, I guess I’m not Kacchan... OR AM I,” and ngl I think he is?? Alternate universes anybody?? Hello??? But anyway, so OFA the First a.k.a. Yoichi was all “remember that time you guys rescued me from my evil brother and Two took my hand and we Had A Moment?”, and Two and Three were all “ahh yeah good times”, and it was very nice and very, very gay. The chapter ended with it being very unclear if Two and Three have actually lent their power to Deku yet or not lmao. Y’all need to get your shit together dudes.

Today on BnHA: Horikoshi is all “what if I gave a random bad guy a fucking tommy gun that shoots nails” and jesus christ calm down son. The Hawksquad, a.k.a. SQUAWK as per @hotchocolatier​, are all “time to drive aimlessly around town acting like Deku has a restraining order on us because that’s literally the best plan to combat the League we could come up with,” and I have no further comment. Hawks is all “idk about you guys but I want to know more about AFO and Tomura’s whole deal” and I can’t remember the last time I identified so strongly with one of these characters. All Might is all, “[EXPLODES???]”, and the chapter ends with that mysterious hot girl from the Tartarus breakout being all “HELLO I CAN TURN INTO A GUN AND I LITERALLY DON’T GIVE A FUCK” and (1) WOW, and (2) IT’S TRUE, SHE CAN, AND SHE REALLY DOESN’T. GODDAMN.

(ETA: so this wholly escaped my notice on the first go, and also has nothing to do with the chapter itself, but I only just realized that this chapter was scanlated by a new group, TCB Scans. they actually did a very good job, and I’m curious if they’ve found a new RAW provider, because the quality this week is actually crazy good in comparison to what we’ve been dealing with for the past few months. I’m gonna have to get caught up on what exactly happened here lol.)

so what will it be this week? more Vestige antics? more of Sad Nomad Deku standing on buildings and pretending like he’s some cool aloof antihero, as if he could fool us when we all know his hero backpack is secretly stuffed full with his nerd diaries and the remnants of all the hero bentos that All Might keeps giving him?? or, just putting it out there, just a crazy thought, but you don’t suppose we might actually cut back to U.A.? mmm. side-eyes emoji

maaaaaan I’m starting to get tired of this trend of beginning chapters by dropping in on random power-tripping civilians and/or Shindou lol. just once can we get a chapter that opens with someone I actually give a fuck about

oh at least Endeavor is here

A WHAT SUPPORT ITEM!??! HOLY SHIT DDLKJSLFKJL

lol somehow that’s more terrifying than bullets for me?? like I’m fully aware that bullets will fuck you up way worse and that in real life nail guns probably don’t work like this AT ALL and only have a range of like... hold up let me just google... up to 100 to 150 m/s and distances of up to 500m wait WHAT

okay wait. hold up. like I was expecting google to tell me nail guns only shoot a few feet at most, and instead the first search result is some CDC blog article that’s “dispelling” the “””myth””” -- please note my repeated sarcastic quotation marks -- that nail guns can fire 1400 feet per second, by explaining that actually they can fire anywhere from 315 ft/sec to 1,295 ft/sec, and that “it is in the pneumatic nail gun user’s best interest to handle these tools as if they were a firearm despite having a lower velocity” dlkjdslkjflkl

SO THAT SCENE IN IRON MAN 3 WHERE TONY RAIDS A HOME DEPOT AND BUYS A BUNCH OF RANDOM TOOLS AND SHIT AND GOES ON TO STAGE A ONE-MAN INVASION OF AN INTERNATIONAL TERRORIST’S FLORIDA MANSION HQ IS ACTUALLY TRUE. YOU’RE TELLING ME THAT THE FILM “HOME ALONE” IS ACTUALLY A DOCUMENTARY. “the Discovery Channel television program “Mythbusters” compared the penetration capacity of an airborne projectile shot from a pneumatic framing nail gun to that of a 9mm hand gun” HELLO YES AND A MERRY “WHAT THE FUCK” TO YOU AS WELL

anyway, so. there’s apparently a reason why the Number One hero, who can burn people with the intensity of a sun going supernova, is hiding here behind this concrete support column making frowny faces. nope. nuh uh. he ain’t about that. I don’t blame you buddy

so now he’s barrel rolling out of his hiding place and setting this dude THE FUCK ON FIRE because HELL NO. BAD ENOUGH I HAD TO WATCH THAT FUCKING MUSHROOM EPISODE LAST WEEK! YOU TAKE THAT SHIT SOMEWHERE ELSE

LOL look at his face

I know the context is actually him being all “I know I’m responsible for basically everything that happened and so that’s why I’m so grim and serious about this mission to set things right piece by piece,” but in my mind this pissed-off face is 100% all because this dude tried to shoot his eye out with a nail gun. look at that. you made him go full flame face again. beard and all. protecting his face so that it can hopefully melt any stray nails that get too close. nope nope nope

good lord. so what’s up next. let me guess the guy fighting Best Jeanist has like an atomic chainsaw or some shit

lol nope we’re just cutting back to Hawks and Jeanist chilling in the Jesla after they’ve wrapped things up

Jeanist has got some serious Groot energy you guys jesus christ he’s like 12 feet tall

oh snap someone threw a pipe at him now

today is just the chapter of Endeavor being assaulted by random DIY tools I guess

I mean, I get why they’re pissed at him obviously; I would be too lol. but tbh I also don’t really understand the “get out of here we don’t want your help” attitude that all of these people suddenly seem to have?? like it if were me, I would be fucking DEMANDING for him and the other heroes to be working round the clock to fix their stupid mess. I mean who else is gonna do it?? it’s their mess, I sure don’t want to be the one to clean it up instead. anyways but whatever lol

oh shit?

so they haven’t dropped the whole “OFA secret potentially gets revealed to the world” thing yet after all. that makes sense I suppose, it did seem like that whole thing wound up playing out a bit too easily

anyway so yeah

the locals are definitely none too happy. well at least Dabi’s got something to be cheerful about I guess

so now we’re cutting to the interior of the Jesla and they’re chitchatting about the current investigation

oh wow this actually makes a bit of sense now. so there was a reason they were keeping their distance from Deku

please note that even in this abstract Endeavor’s-Mental-Image-Of-Him panel, Deku’s eyes still don’t have the light in them anymore :( my poor son

also ftr I still think using Deku as bait in this particular sense is the shittiest idea ever ngl. like sure, let’s let the sixteen-year-old run around battling miscellaneous escaped prison convicts while we stay several kilometers away ON PURPOSE despite the fact that you’re using him as bait to draw out the Big Bad, who just a reminder can destroy anything with a mere touch and who you were all basically helpless against. what exactly are you all planning to do if Tomura or one of the other League VIPs actually shows up to retrieve him?? are you even keeping tabs on him at all in real time?? jesus

(ETA: well that escalated quickly lol.)

Horikoshi is all of a sudden dropping whole pages of exposition here and I can’t be bothered to summarize this lol so just,

a big fat YES to what Jeanist said, though. that’s why imo they would have been better off laying a trap at U.A. rather than just wandering around out in the open. I assume they’re trying to cut their potential losses because U.A. is full of students (and civilians), but those students also happen to be more capable than pretty much anyone else in the manga at this point. and tbh they’re already in life-threatening danger regardless of how things play out from here on, so they might as well at least try to use the few advantages they have right now. U.A. is almost certainly going to come under siege at some point anyway, so they might as well prepare for it

lol I don’t think I’m explaining this very well because I don’t have the patience right now to break it down point by point like it really ought to be, so for now I’ll just say that imo “U.A. siege” stands a good chance of being the eventual endgame even now, and so this whole “Deku runs around being bait” arc is really just killing time until then lol. like and subscribe for more rambling nonsensical takes such as this. maybe next time I’ll even put it all into one single sentence for maximum meandering senior citizen rant value

well it’s nice that they’re finally talking about all of this I guess

we readers have known all of this for months now but this confirms the heroes are finally caught up. ALSO, Hawks is so fucking smart, as always. kinda wonder if things would have played out differently if All Might had let him in on the secret a bit earlier. probably that’s why Horikoshi made damn sure they didn’t find out until after the War arc lol

OH MY GOD YOOOOOO HAWKS OUT HERE ASKING THE REAL QUESTIONS

“anyone else wondering why AFO bothered to raise Tomura as his fake heir for fifteen years when he was secretly planning on taking over his body the whole time” YES, [raises hand] lmao Hawks where the hell were you when I was debating this “AFO is the final villain and Tomura is just his pawn” thing on multiple occasions over the past several years lol

lmao seeing them debate the metaphysics of OFA and all of its mystical bullshit is seriously surreal you guys

JEANIST HAVE YOU CHECKED OUT MY META TAG I HAVE WRITTEN SO MANY ESSAYS. I ACTUALLY WAS PLANNING ON WRITING ANOTHER ESSAY ABOUT THE THING THAT I’M PRETTY SURE HAWKS IS ABOUT TO BRING UP, BUT I NEVER GOT AROUND TO IT WHOOPS, BUT MAYBE I WILL NOW LOL LET’S SEE HOW IT GOES

yes!!

WHICH AFO FUCKING ENSURED HE WOULD BE BY LITERALLY PLANNING OUT EVERY LAST DETAIL OF HIS FAMILY TRAGEDY, FROM SECRETLY GIVING TENKO THE QUIRK TO MAKING SURE NO CIVILIANS OR HEROES WOULD HELP HIM UNTIL AFO FINALLY STEPPED IN. I’M 1000% CONVINCED THIS IS THE CASE YOU GUYS. NOT JUST BECAUSE I’M NOT A FAN OF “THE WORLD IS A FUNDAMENTALLY SHITTY PLACE, ACTUALLY” TAKES BECAUSE MISTER ROGERS TOLD ME TO ALWAYS LOOK FOR THE HELPERS, BUT ALSO BECAUSE IT LITERALLY JUST DOESN’T MAKE A LICK OF SENSE OTHERWISE. THEIR ENTIRE HOUSE CAVED IN FFS, YOU’RE TELLING ME NONE OF THE NEIGHBORS FUCKING OVERHEARD THAT SHIT AND WENT “UMMMMMMMMM” AND WENT TO SEE WHAT WAS GOING ON?? “DIDN’T THERE USED TO BE A HOUSE HERE, AND LIKE A WHOLE FAMILY, AND SHIT?”

LIKE I’M SORRY, BUT IT’S ONE THING TO SAY IT’S REALISTIC THAT NOT A SINGLE PERSON WOULD ATTEMPT TO HELP THE WANDERING TRAUMATIZED CHILD AFTERWARDS (WHICH I DISAGREE WITH AS WELL BUT AT LEAST THAT’S MORE SUBJECTIVE), AND IT’S A WHOLE OTHER THING TO ARGUE THAT IT’S REALISTIC THAT NO ONE WOULD BE FUCKING NOSY. LIKE THAT’S A WHOLE DIFFERENT LEVEL OF “THAT’S NOT HOW ANY OF THIS WORKS” ENTIRELY LOL. anyway tl;dr AFO is a piece of shit and Tomura’s entire worldview is based on a magnificently intricate and savagely cruel lie more at 11

anyway so after all that ranting it looks like that wasn’t even what Hawks was talking about after all lol. I just went off for absolutely no reason lol oh well. instead it seems that Hawks is suggesting that Tomura’s carefully cultivated hatred might not yet have actually reached “can defeat OFA” levels even after all of that trauma. interesting!

don’t mind me, I’m just sitting here while my brain furiously scrambles to put together all the parallels between Hawks and Tomura that it never noticed before until exactly this second. like I’m not even sure that was the intent here at all (I need to check out another translation or two lol), but regardless my mind decided that now would be the perfect time to make the connection between these two twenty-somethings who both had horrific childhoods and spent years being molded by their respective manipulative guardians, and developed eerily similar “laugh at everything because what else can you do” coping mechanisms to deal with it all hmmmmm

anyway so they were talking more about their strategy, but now all of a sudden Jeanist’s phone is beeping??

AND NOW WE’RE CUTTING AWAY TO ALL MIGHT AND HIS MIGHTMOBILE DAMMIT so that means the call to Jeanist was actually something important then!! WAS IT BAKUGOU OMG. DOES YOUR INTERN WANT A WORD FFFKLFSJK please it’s been so long I just need a little crumb or two to tide me over lmao have mercy

anyway so All Might’s following the GPS tracking device he’s apparently got planted on Deku (which in my conspiracy headcanons he’s actually had for a long time now, like since before DvK2 lol because HOW ELSE WOULD HAVE HAVE KNOWN THAT THEY WERE FIGHTING EACH OTHER IN GROUND BETA, PEOPLE) and thinking angsty thoughts about Deku’s sucky life

AND NOW ALL MIGHT’S PHONE IS RINGING TOO?? BAKUGOU HOW MANY PEOPLE ARE YOU CALLING. “WHERE ARE YOU HIDING THE NERD GODDAMMIT”

OMG

lol is he under attack or is he just finally giving All Might the slip like we all know he SECRETLY PLANNED TO ALL ALONG oh my poor dumb angstmuffin

OMG AHHHHHHH WHAT

DID ALL MIGHT JUST FUCKING DIE LMAO NO OF COURSE NOT, BUT WHAT

WHAT IS HAPPENING OMG

THE FUCK IS THAT. AT LEAST IT’S NOT A NAIL

OH IT’S A SPEAKER!! OMG DID THEY TAKE ALL MIGHT HOSTAGE

“THEY’RE HERE” WELP, TIME TO SEE JUST HOW SHITTY THIS SHITTY PLAN REALLY IS LOL

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

SHE!!!!

omg. AND OVERHAUL JUST CHILLING THERE IN THE BACKGROUND ALL “WHAT DO YOU EVEN WANT ME TO DO I’VE GOT NO FUCKING ARMS” YEAH GOOD RIDDANCE LOL

DOES THIS GIRL HAVE ONE GIANT LEG OR WHAT, LIKE WHAT’S THE DEAL HERE

-- HOLD UP WAIT, THE GUN IS HER ARM, HOLY SHIT SHE CAN TURN INTO A GUN -- OKAY HOLD UP BECAUSE I NEED TO SAY THAT IN BIGGER TEXT BECAUSE !!!!

YOU GUYS, THE COOL TARTARUS GIRL IS BACK AND HER QUIRK IS “CAN TURN INTO A FUCKING GUN.” THIS IS NOT A DRILL!! MY BEST GIRL MT. GUN IS FINALLY BACK ON THE SCENE WITH HER QUIRK “CAN DO ANYTHING A GUN CAN DO.” “I HEARD Y’ALL WENT AND NAMED ONE OF YOUR HEROES ‘GUNHEAD’ EVEN THOUGH HIS HEAD ISN’T EVEN A GUN, LIKE WTF IS UP WITH THAT LET ME SHOW YOU HOW IT’S DONE” DANG OKAY

lmao only fifteen pages this week, and STILL NO KACCHAN (THEN WHO WAS PHONE!!!), but man I don’t even care because finally we’ve got a cliffhanger that’s actually deserving of being a cliffhanger! hot dog. okay then

[infinitewarden]

Osiris isn’t Savathun.

Great! Now that I have your attention:

Man you guys tire me out about Osiris. If you truly believe this is Osiris I don’t mean to sound like That Guy that’s like “you don’t know what you’re talking about” but... You don’t know what you’re talking about.

So.

Let’s talk about how much Osiris cares about the City and humanity and why the Osiris in Epilogue is not actually Osiris.

Alright. Let’s start off with context. I think it’s super important to see what we do know as Osiris’s views. From my heavy analyses of him since 2020 I can confidently say these are what he views as the most important things a person can do:

Keep promises

Speak their truths

Protect the City & Humanity

Know that the Vex are true Evil.

Now, I won’t be doing a breakdown of each one individually but I will be talking a great deal of how important honesty is to Osiris, the City, and his views of the Vex.

Speaking honestly and bluntly.

I don’t know how many of you were into Destiny before Beyond Light, so if you were unaware of this it’s not your fault. However I’ve seen a very strange change in tone when it comes to how people view Osiris. Before Season of Hunt people hated - and I mean hated - Osiris. Why? Because he was blunt. They viewed his bluntness as rudeness.

To see a sudden switch to him being secretive and scheming is... alarming, to say the least. (And to see people think that this is the norm is also alarming but in other ways.)

The Osiris before Hunt was not secretive and scheming. He sought knowledge openly. He sought, specifically, the truth. I must stress just how open he was about his plans. First I’ll give you a few in lore examples:

I admit, I found your questions divisive and disloyal, and I feared you might be capable of breaking our unity when the City's position had grown so tenuous. Why divert attention away from the Traveler, our only hope? And then it got worse, dabbling in thanatonautics, Ahamkara-lore, chasing after Xur and the tricks of the Nine. Launching expeditions into the Reef and beyond at a time when ships were irreplaceable. Your quest split Guardians along ideological lines. This was your greatest crime: Hunters chose to pursue your visions instead of protecting refugees, Titans assembled teams to chase the legendary Vault of Glass instead of striking the Fallen, and Warlocks turned away from the study of the Traveler in favor of  your  ultimate obsession... learning the exact nature of the Darkness. ... Perhaps what drives a Warlock to madness is truth.

Osiris.

"Do not romanticize this burden. We wield a weapon." The Speaker shakes his head. "The Light wields you, Osiris. You are what you make of it. A glorious extension of its majesty, in many directions." Osiris paces at cadence with his words. "Then it would do well to speak clearly. To better direct me." The Speaker cocks his head. "Without will? Then it would be no better than the Darkness." "I am asking only for guidance; it is a delicate game we are playing." Osiris's voice, distressed. Regal again, the Speaker motions to the stone garden. "Will you sit with me?"

13: Margins Part II.

And, while I don’t particularly like using the Fall of Osiris comic as a source, it does have very important lines on his viewpoints that I find relevant yet.

Fall of Osiris #1.

Hell he was open about his plans to fuck with time itself to bring Saint back.

Sagira narrowed her eye at the rogue Lightbearer and lowered herself to Osiris’s shoulder. “Why’s he here?” she asked quietly. “I asked him to consult on the engineering work,” Osiris replied, crossing his arms. “You sicko,” the other man declared, walking a circle around the Warlock, his eyes darting along every surface of the Sundial around them. ... “Just one more question, then. Why all the fuss?” “I owe him.” “I owe a lotta people, Warlock. You’re opening the gates of hell with a Vex key.” “When the Traveler brought me back, I had no friends. No family—” “No one had anything in the Dark Age.” “But Saint was always there. And I saw him grow from neophyte to demigod.”

The Sundial.

"You haven't left the Forest in years," Ikora said to Osiris, the only one to address him directly. "I need help," Osiris replied. "I know," Ikora responded, hands clasped behind her back. She stared intently at her former mentor. Back in her Crucible days, that uncompromising gaze was often the last thing her opponents saw. Aunor glanced sidelong at her superior. Harper coughed and looked down at his datapad. "Two years ago, Guardians entered the Infinite Forest," Osiris continued. "They aided me in defeating the Axis Mind Panoptes, preventing a Vex apocalypse from befalling this system. "In the process," he looked between each of them in turn, "Some Guardians reported a body they found in the Forest depths." Ikora sighed. "Saint-14 never came back from that last mission to Mercury. We finally knew why. I reacted to it the only way I knew how."

Desperate Times.

“I do not understand all of this code. This is Geppetto’s specialty,” Saint-14 says while standing bent over a wide desk covered in data tablets. Holographic images of the Lighthouse shimmer in the Hangar lights. “We could use the Crucible right now. Your trials. This will be very helpful. You mean to stay, yes?” “I will. Long enough to show you how to implement the simulation; but tonight, I must disembark,” Osiris says. “So soon?” Osiris tenses his jaw in forced silence. He twiddles with code. “I’m worried about what Vance found.” Saint places a heavy hand on Osiris’s chest. “Let go of your obsession. Do not leave chasing phantoms again.” “Phantoms… You think the Darkness is satisfied? This is just the first move. I need to know the next before it’s made.” “If there is something you fear, let me help you. We face this together.” Osiris’s mind drifts to the Dark anomalies. Saint doesn’t need another burden. “The safest place for you is the Tower, Saint. Time... tends to renege on its gifts.” “So, your mission is dangerous?” Osiris considers lying. “Potentially.”

Immolant I.

There are many more sources I could list on his bluntness and honesty but there’s honestly too much. What is important to extrapolate from all of it is this:

OSIRIS SPOKE THE TRUTH NO MATTER IF IT GOT HIM IN TROUBLE. IT IS ONE OF THE MAIN REASONS HE GOT EXILED.

Protecting the City & Humanity

Idk where people get the idea that he’s abandoned the City and humanity. And I don’t understand where people think it’s “typical Osiris behavior” to choose to put the City in danger.

I want to make something very clear here:

Osiris was exiled. He did not abandon the City. And though others view him as abandoning it, that wasn’t his intention. He never intentionally abandoned it. Everything he did was in pursuit of a brighter future for humanity. Let’s look at one of his lines from the Sundial activity during Dawn.

“By the time I left the City, many believed my practices to be sacrilege. But my methods have prevented countless futures not unlike the one you walk now. When it is laid out before you, would you not sacrifice anything to see this future shut?”

The Sundial.

He left because he weighed his options and he saw that humanity would have better use of him if he left. He cares A great deal about the City. He cares almost too much about it. He would never give Lakshmi the technology to cause it harm, especially knowing that she’s unstable. And I’ve seen some people think he’s playing 5D chess? In what world would he ever choose to bring harm upon humanity for some sort of... agenda; which I’ve already cleared up earlier, he’s open about his plans.

Let’s look at more known lore about Osiris’s feelings of the City & humanity.

"You've wrapped your mind around an idea of your own making. I have always tolerated this fawning 'movement' of yours, but this is a step too far." Osiris seethed. Brother Vance was awestruck. He stared blankly at Osiris, unsure of what he could say to quell his anger and dissolve his frustration. "What I have discovered…" "…is dangerous enough to destroy every man, woman, and child in existence. You're meddling with forces outside your grasp," Osiris reprimanded. "I warn you here and now, remove yourself from this Lighthouse. Find a simple life. Start a family. Write music. Leave Mercury and this fool's errand behind."

Chapter 8: Idolatry.

Osiris was furious to find out Vance was experimenting in his name by endangering people for his goals. And he was especially mad that he would dive into such dangerous areas so much so that it had the potential to destroy humanity.

"It's truth." Osiris considers this. "Truth seems subjective these days," Osiris says, finally observing his entourage for the first time. Among them, a small group of men and women, stand two wayward Guardians—Warlocks, it appears—and a child. Their forlorn faces resonate with him. Castaways and believers. The weeks since his departure from the Last City have worn on him. He was used to working alone, knowing he could fall back to the City's resources should he need them. Now, adrift in the expanse of purpose, he finds himself longing for a place he could return to. A sanctuary.

Chapter 2: Postexilic.

Here’s a few lines from Season of Dawn:

“The Traveler, mutilated. Mercury, a desolate warzone. This is the bleak future the Cabal wants for us all. We do not know what has become of humanity here. I hope we will not find out.”

.

“There are many terrible futures, but I have not grown numb to seeing them. The future the Cabal wish for is a nightmare for humanity.”

.

“If the Traveler fled the system, there is a chance that the Darkness would ignore our region of the galaxy entirely. It would sacrifice our second awakening, our ability to wield the Light, but potentially continue our Golden Age. There are too many variables at risk, but it's a variant path worth investigating in the Infinite Forest.”

.

“This battered Mercury is a blueprint for our system. Lightless, bowed, and nothing more than fuel for an endless war. It must never come to pass.”

The Sundial.

There are many. Many. More lines I could put here about how much Osiris doesn’t want to see humanity suffering. And especially how he doesn’t want the City to be at risk. But I think you get the picture.

Know that the Vex are true Evil.

So. We all know Osiris as “the Vex guy.” His whole thing is on fighting the Vex. However it seems people think that he’d be okay with using them for grounds of a higher purpose? Or something? I don’t know, everyone I see rebuffing Osiris’s actions with Lakshmi don’t seem to be interested in explaining this one.

So anyways. Let’s talk about how Osiris views the Vex as true evil compared to other species.

“The Fallen are not so different from us. How hard would you fight if the Light were taken from you?” “Those stories ring false to me,” said Saint. “They are not a noble people. I’ve fought them, and so have you.” “I have not fought them all,” the Warlock replied, pulling his hands apart to create an intricate web of hovering cubes and points of light. “They are nothing, no threat—not like the Vex. Not like the Darkness.”

Vanguard Commander.

[u.2:06] Have you spoken to the House of Light, like I asked? [u.1:07] I would rather not speak with Fallen. [u.2:07] They may need our help. Their cause is just. [u.1:08] What happened to “trust no one?” [u.2:08] What happened to your sense of right and wrong, hero?

Maintenance Operations Log 30037.

The unenlightened wonder at my so-called "fixation" upon the Vex. They believe our gravest existential threat is the Hive, for those beings have made a pact with the Darkness itself via the medium of the Worm Gods (according to Toland, at least, and I see no reason to doubt him in this). But Darkness is not merely absence of Light. Darkness is an entity unto itself. Put simply, Darkness is not Nothing. But the Vex? The Vex seek neither Light nor Darkness. They seek Convergence, the reduction of all life to its simplest, most meaningless form. An entelechy of zeros and ones. "Evil" is a word for sentimentalists and fools. But, in the ontology of the sentimental, the Vex are more deserving of the term than the Hive. Given a choice between Darkness and Convergence, I would choose Darkness. It is a logical choice. Yet for this they banish me.

Kairos Function (Hunter).

This one is important because Osiris doesn’t subscribe to the idea of “good” and “evil”, and that he would go so far to say that the Vex are Evil shows just how much of a threat he views them as.

It’s just. Mind boggling to me that people think that Osiris would be okay with a Vex invasion. That Osiris would encourage Lakshmi to open up a rift to “send the Fallen away” (Despite being one of the earliest sympathizers!) Osiris isn’t ineffable, he’s just a man trying to do his best to help humanity. His actions aren’t difficult to understand, they have been written to be very clear and with understanding his motives.

Saying that it’s natural for him to be secretive and have contradicting opinions and actions is just. Wrong. It’s not him. It’s not how he’s supposed to be understood. Even in Curse of Osiris I don’t think his actions didn’t make any sense.

This is going to sound very mean but I want to be 100% clear: If you think that Osiris would actively choose to put the City in danger of the Vex, if you think that he would actively choose to stand calmly and watch as his lover was about to die to the very things he spent millions of lives to save... You don’t understand Osiris. Go back and reread his lore.

I leave you with this:

The Vanguard is dubious of our intent and ability, fearing corruption and displacement. They do not trust me. You were held in similar contempt for speaking your truth and empowering free thought. You know what it feels like to be chastised and labeled a traitor. We are mere steps away from a disintegration of our institutions, and they cannot see destruction staring them in the face. ... For so long, we have clung to the Light, denying the strength offered by the Dark. By using Stasis, we will end this war. We see this contest for what it truly is: a game, played by our adversaries. And we have been the pawns. We are pawns no more. This is not a battle I want to wage without you, although we may not have a choice in the matter. Wherever you may be, please come back to us.

To Osiris.

[probably-haven]

Hello!! After seeing what you wrote about xiaoven fics I went to see what things you usually write and omg, your archon Venti headcanons????? I am absolutely in love. So if it isn't annoying, could you talk about xiaoven or Venti or Xiao or whatever ship or character you like? I don't care what you are going to say, I just want to know more about your thoughts ^^

I- is this... bestie, this is essentially a free ramble pass- kerujsgheskdfug. Trust me when I say that in no way is this, and in no way will it ever be annoying in the slightest- i literally- lets just say rambling off thoughts is kind of my specialty, especially when provided a topic to branch off of because otherwise I'm just- really indecisive about it so- iujskdh yeah- 100% definitely down to talk about Venti, Xiao, and/or Xiaoven XD. Also, yes- it may have been awhile since i last posted one(cuz again, indecisive about which direction to take part 5), but the Archon War Era Venti headcanons are still without a doubt my favorite posts I've made. It's just such an interesting topic with such endless potential that so few people actually think about or consider or even realize is there, so i always just get really psyched whenever i see someone interact with them lol.

.... this ended up being a bit of a mess: warning in advance

Anyway! onto the actual content!

- You see the thing about Xiaoven is that there's a lot of different ways that it could end up working out, and just personally my favorite way of portraying Xiaoven in my mind is as an unlabeled relationship because if anyone in genshin would give off that vibe its these two. And a number of other reasons.

- Firstly, I heavily headcanon Venti as being an aroace polyplatonic or perhaps heavily demiromantic. However, regardless of this I just don't think that Venti is really the kind of person to worry about how he should label his feelings, thinking it's silly to try to put them in one box or the other, especially with feelings and emotions being as fluid as they are in general. Plus it fits his whole God of Freedom vibe. I just- dont think he's the biggest fan of labels or social categorization in general.

- And secondly on the hand of Xiao... his defense mechanisms are very much ingrained in his personality. It's probably hard enough for him to not go into fight or flight(the answer is fight) at the slightest affection at first, at the slightest feeling of vulnerability. Even further down the line, with his fierce dedication to Liyue, I cant help but get the vibe that the moment he recognized that he was falling for Venti he would begin avoiding him, not only to avoid distraction from his duty, but to avoid corrupting him or losing him in general like he has with like basically every other person he gets close with(even believing that the cycle had repeated once more when he first heard of Morax's death)... now imagine Venti tryna slap a label on their relationship and tell me Xiao would have a positive reaction.

- The thing with Xiaoven.... honestly, i feel like theres more ways that it can go wrong than it can go right, but if they do manage to make their relationship work out, it's just simply beautiful in all terms of the word.

- Lets talk about killing. - During the Archon War, both were forced to kill a large number of people and gods alike- Venti out of a need to remain alive to protect Mondstadt, it's freedom, and the nameless bard's legacy by extent- and Xiao out of servitude to the god that was once his master

..... actually- break here- ive talked a lot about Venti on this blog but I havent actually spoken about Xiao all that much- so i should probably do that a bit first... do note though that my characterization of Xiao is pretty flexible actually- this is just- the possible characterization of him that i tend to favor as being the most- uh- "realistically complex"

-

Theres a line I saw this one time in a certain story: "He is a trained weapon. That's what he is, was, and always will be. You cannot change that so stop trying." And i just- think its a really interesting concept- that applies pretty well to Xiao now that i actually think about it. - the concept behind it is this: After spending more than a vast majority of his life killing or otherwise in battle, it's become a part of who he is, a normalcy that after centuries and centuries would be near impossible to get rid of or reverse, and even if it was possible, with his karmic debt constantly eating away at him its unlikely he has enough time left for that to happen. - it sounds like a cruel thing to say about him- but in context it's actually pretty layered and i think about it a lot. It's not as much a "he's a killer lol, that his whole personality" its more of a "The centuries of trauma he experienced have conditioned him into a constantly alert and battle ready mindset while also shaping his dehumanizing inferior-in-worth-but-superior-in-capability view of himself that would have likely been necessary to get through those time, and at this point he's been under that conditioning for long enough that it's essentially ingrained itself in his personality."

- the main idea is- it's a part of who he is, that needs to be accepted as who he is because its not something that he can just up and change. It's not all he is of course but his constant battle mode, as though always waiting to be ambushed or to be granted a new target to eradicate.

a couple character story quotes:

-"His past of service under the evil god had rid Xiao of his innocence and gentleness. All that remained within him was the means to kill and the weight of his sins. The only way he could be of service to mortals was in combat." -"Xiao does not feel any hatred. Having lived for over two thousand years, no single karmic debt constitutes anything more than a fleeting memory. No grudge can last a thousand years; nor is any debt so great that it cannot be paid off in this time. Xiao has spent many long years alone. But his battles have never been in vain." -"where did Xiao have to return to? He was merely leaving the battlefield." -"since Xiao wages a constant war against dark forces powerful enough to devour Liyue in its entirety, any bystanders who witness him in the heat of battle are likely to end up as collateral damage." -"The war he fights can never be won, and will never come to an end." -"Because ultimately, the one with whom Xiao wrestles is himself."

i feel like at some point this very nearly did consume his whole personality, almost turning him into nothing more than a being of slaughter under Morax's control, devoid of any "humanity" at all, consumed and corrupted by his karmic debt like his fellow yakshas before him. - until he experienced a moment of clarity- a song in the wind, the peaceful melody of a dihua flute. - and pulled back from the border of something he wouldnt have been able to return from, there a was a shift in his mind- a concept grown unfamiliar enough with time that it took him a great time to identify what it was; a curiosity. Something that there was no place for on the battlefield, something that by all means should have been completely useless to Xiao, and yet he held onto that curiosity, slowly regaining over time, a sense of who he was and who he could choose to be with each song that the wind chose to carry towards him every once in a blue moon.

and eventually that curiousity turned to longing. Longing "for a day to come when he will wear the mask and dance — not to conquer demons, but to the tune of that flute amid a sea of flowers"

...... uh- heh- if you couldn’t tell already i have a tendency to make my characterizations/analyses of characters more serious that i probably should. 

to summarize: Xiao is constantly toeing the line between his ingrained nature and his humanity- almost as though still trying to decide how much of that humanity he deserves to have, how much he is allowed to have, and how much is safe to have.

^looking back after writing this, i think the best way to explain it is that this is the view that i keep in mind/the lense that i tend to most enjoy looking through and refering back to while examining and/or analyzing his character, actions, story, lines, and overall personality.

idk- i kinda got off track but i just think its a really interesting interpretation to think about because it has some really interesting implications ig- it’s not the full extent of how i view him of course, but i kinda got ahead of myself and its long enough as is so ill just elaborate as i go- Lol i actually have in progress playlists for both him and venti and just- vibes- i could ramble about the playlists alone for hours explaining everything... It’s probably a problem- uh- ill keep going now lol.

anyways! stepping off the angst path for a brief break! Brought to you by their lines in the snow: both waiting for it to get thick enough, Venti for the purpose of a snowball fight and Xiao for the purpose of a tasty and nutritious breakfast.

but its actually something of note that Xiao doesnt actually need to eat so anything he does eat is usually out of obligation or enjoyment- so like.... snow.... like i dont blame him, but of all things- an adeptus who refuses to eat basically anything but almond tofu looks at the freezing-cold-floor-water that yeeted itself from above and decided at some point- damn- that seems more edible than basically ever single actually edible thing ever.... im gonna eat it- like- im glad if eating snow makes him happy but- at the same time...

He probably convinces Venti to eat snow too though and Venti wouldnt even resist I mean he’s wind and has probably consumed worse things in his time so- 2 anemo cryptids with glowing tattoos sitting in Dragonspine monching snow in the dead of night is an amusing thought to me.

- kay, now back to more serious-toned thoughts

One of the things about the ship that i really like is the different contradicting parallels between them:

A lot of how i view Xiao’s character is someone formed largely by the things he cant control and who was forced to accept that accepted that and learned to thrive in it as much as he can.  Venti on the other hand is surrounded by things he cant control and is ever adapting to control as much as he can while embracing whatever he cant as being part of the unpredictability of the world, seeing beauty in it. 

both of them have lost people and do what they do to honor their memory: Xiao continues to do what the Yakshas once did And Venti chooses to do what his friend couldn’t

Xiao’s power coming from himself  and Venti’s from others And both seem to appear to use their power for their own gain while truly helping others behind the scenes

both have killed a lot of people during the archon war Xiao views it as another necessary event out of his control and Venti would likely view it as a tragedy he chose to enact himself

and this is where we meet out balance

Xiao- contrary to how i think a lot of people view him as thinking of himself as a monster- seems canonically to have accepted this as part of his duty, as long as those he killed are not mortals. I dont think he enjoys it no- but someone has to do it and he’s just accepted that its a part of his duty Venti on the other hand-

See the beauty of the ship- as someone with an angst-centric mind- is this- these are two of the most traumatized mfers in the game 

Xiao is by far the one who needs the most help and who can serve to benefit most from the ship- but he is nowhere near self aware enough to recognize that there’s anything wrong or unhealthy about his mindset in the slightest-

whereas you have the contrast with Venti who sorted through most of his trauma with the nameless bard alone during the archon war and while the result appears more healthy- is still really not- but he’s not self aware of that either because i mean- who’s going to tell him? nobody even knows. 

however- venti is aware enough to notice flaws in Xiao’s mindset and “Venti” enough to want to help them through it-

Xiao- while not aware enough to recognize the flaws in Venti’s mindset, can recognize where it contrasts with his own, and is blunt enough to point it out- and then it’s out there to be mulled over- 

they’re so similar and yet so different and a feel just conversing between the two of them, being in each others precense, just being exposed to two mindsets that are so very different could do both of them a whole lot of good.

GEEE THAT BIT OF RAMBLING HAD LITTLE TO NO DIRECTION AT ALL- LET ME-- LET ME MAKE THIS START MAKING SENSE- WITH... DYNAMICS OR SOMETHING

I don’t think Xiao needs to sleep really- and i dont think that sleeping would do anything except make him uneasy at first- he’d probably just get nightmares after all he’s been through- but with Venti he would soon learn that it doesn’t have to be that way, lulled into the first peaceful sleep he’s had in... as long as he can remember.

anywho back to not making sense cuz im fickle and i think most questions about ships are best displayed through character interactions so like- a possible exchange thats cliche but cliches exist for a reason

Xiao: Why do you try so hard to help me, it isn’t easy. I know that much Venti, with the most adoring expression: Because you’re worth it, obviously Xiao: But surely there are others more deserving of- Venti: No Xiao, everyone is just as deserving as the next person, you included Xiao: Then why me above others? Venti: ehe, cuz ur my warrior of course [O//////O oh shit, hes right] Xiao: My contract is with Morax alone [gay panic but in broody yaksha]

it’s kinda difficult cuz neither of them really address their feelings.  I mean Venti does but he does it very indirectly and its rare that he ever does it with like- genuine directness- even spilling his backstory was in the form of a song- and told in the third person- so a lot of their interactions would often have some deeper meaning, especially with Venti being the bard he is. 

I come up with a lot of- errant thoughts about Xiaoven- but this is making me realize that a true analysis of their ship is rather difficult because it just encompasses so many dynamics so its hard to settle on just one and not go rambling about who knows what bouncing from one end of the ship to the other-  Because you truly can and thats the beauty of it

within one moment you can be having a heartfelt conversation about the archon war the impact of lost friends and times past, and the next moment Venti is trying to forcefeed Xiao an apple while Xiao screams about disrespecting the adepti and its just- so lovely

so while they have picnics with nothing but apples, dandelion wine, and almond tofu they can sit down and talk about the dreams Xiao once devoured, and the dandelion wine and apple cider that the first Ragnvindir invented from the plants that never could have grown in Old Mond. The foods that tasted of familiarity, or of the grilled ticker fish Pervases always used to eat, foods that tasted of friends and frankly family that had since passed, glaze lilies and cecilias and qingxin flowers scattered in the surroundings and woven into Xiao’s neat braids and Venti’s now messy ones, rebraided by the steady and inexperienced hands of one unused to gentle action. 

and then of course Venti steals Xiao’s tofu once the mood becomes too grim and replaces it with a bottle of wine that Xiao refers to as “vile poison,” a remark that fatally wounds Venti as he collapses on the floor, proclaiming how he can only be healed by a Yaksha’s kiss. Xiao ignores this of course and simply takes back his tofu with a slight smile on his face, but as Venti persists he soundlessly places a kiss on his own palm before intertwining their fingers and pulling him back up from where he was dramatically sprawled on the floor, grumbling about how such action was “unbecoming of an archon.” A sign of affection only Xiao would ever know about. But Venti is literally wind and I hc his senses work differently anyways so he definitely knows- plus Xiao’s face is red as the blood of his enemies and the way he is pointedly not looking at Venti at all really speaks volumes anyways. 

 -Venti playing epic battle music whenever Xiao goes into fights in what looks like a ridiculously extra performance to anyone else but is actually doing wonders to keep Xiao’s karma at bay

-Venti preaches the practice of “kissing wounds better” and Xiao is unfamiliar with this medical treatment but views it as unnecessary regardless because adepti have accelerated healing, doesn’t mean he’s going to stop him though. 

-Messages whispered on the wind

-Venti’s 1000 year sleep- an accident, not a fun time for the yaksha, and not a fun time for Venti once he woke up. Venti is actually more afraid of restful sleep than Xiao is, hence the sleeping in trees thing, but when Xiao is there, he can sleep restfully with faith that Xiao wont let another millennia slip through his fingertips. 

- Xiao tends to make excuses when doing things that aren’t necessary to his duty, like in his birthday voice line “Have this, it’s a butterfly i made from leaves... Okay. Take it. It’s an adepti amulet -- it staves off evil” because at the current point in his progress it helps him to feel like he’s allowed to do these things. Not wanting to put him off from progress, Venti never comments on his excuse but never fails to whisper a quick reminder of how proud he is of how far Xiao had come.

- Xiao’s karma saddens Venti greatly- not only because of how it effects Xiao but also because its a reminder that as much as Venti tries to honor the memory of those he’s killed, there will always be those who resent him for it, and when he took the option of living away from them, he truly can’t blame them. - And when he gets too wrapped up in thoughts, whether around this topic or similar ones or otherwise, eventually, he’ll hear the sound of a flute on the wind. It’s not divine by any means, but as his own wind connects him to the source, he gets the sentiment all the same. “What impact does one individual’s remaining wrath have on the present. You have done much to help the living in the present” the unspoken idea that Xiao has included himself in that statement, because now, with Venti’s help he’s beginning to learn just how to experience living for himself. 

- Venti’s form and Xiao’s mask are off limit topics though because if either mentions it the other will counter with the opposite and the mood will turn immediately bitter at the idea that both know that what they’re doing is destructive but neither are willing to change

- Venti who has different tells for negative feelings than most people because as much as he likes to pretend it is- this form isnt his, and Xiao who is able to identify those

- many fanfics and headcanons have Venti recognizing when Xiao is uncomfortable and getting him out of those situations. I see that and I love it but i raise you: - Venti taking Xiao to Mondstadt, careful that he doesn’t get to the point that he’s uncomfortable. And nothing goes wrong exactly, but Xiao notices the the way Venti’s cape is blowing in the wind, the way he’s holding his weight, barely on his feet so much as floating on the wind, connected with the ground only for the sake of appearance, all the while he looks just as happy go lucky as ever. And without a word, he grabs his hand and teleports them both out of Mondstadt.  - turns out it was just a slight thing that reminded him of the archon war (cuz i will die on the hill of him having more tragic backstory than just Decarabian), and he of course gives a sincere if not flustered thanks to Xiao, because he’s really not used to people noticing. 

- Venti trying to vent sneakily through fictional stories and Xiao is just like “Didn’t that basically happen to you” and Venti is just like “<_< shit”

- Venti once said affectionally that he wished he had met Xiao sooner and Xiao immediately and seriously shot it down by saying “If you had, I would have been forced to kill you” and both of them now stay up at night wondering who would have won that fight, not sure which result would have hurt more. (because honestly I have no idea who would win in that fight and that terrifies me- I like to think it would have been one of those legends that end with “and the fight persists to this day” or something along those lines)

- “How long have you been together?” “Adepti have no need for-” “1000+ years T^T how dare you deny our love” “O///O our...? ...useless”

- its disney- let me explain- i have this- i have this headcanon inspired by watching too many animatics- - so venti has a human form that isnt his- which he would have had to get used to moving in- and he’s a bard- - uh- anyway- as a third degree black belt in mixed martial arts, i can speak as an authority on this(not really an authority since i havent gone since quarantine but lets pretend). We have a thing referred to as the big three(most things do), and those things are martial arts, gymnastics, and dance. The idea is that they reflect really well off of each other and the best in any one category are good in all three. Timing, balance, form, discipline, technique, hand-eye coordination, grace, ease of motion, they all play a part- anyway-

- Venti taking Xiao’s prowess in martial arts and acrobatics and teaching him how to dance, and as someone who’s extremely skilled in the first two, the third comes easy to him, almost naturally. And it’s delicate and beautiful and lovely and it isn’t hurting anyone. And Venti points all these things out and more and despite how much Xiao insists that he feels ridiculous he truly does enjoy it and it goes a long way towards helping him form more healthy views of himself and his worth.  - Verr Goldett walked in on him once and made a joke about performing at the inn. unfortunately Venti was there and agreed on Xiao’s behalf before he could protest and- and it wasn’t as bad as Xiao thought it would be... he still wouldn’t do it again though without reason, but with good enough reasoning he could probably be convinced. 

- anyways point is he likes dancing to Venti’s songs and i just think that’s really cute - just picture the idea that all the animatics you see actually have the potential to be canon- ugh

- venti tries holding something out of Xiao’s reach since he’s taller and Xiao just fucking teleports 

- both need their space but when they dont, all they have to do is speak the other’s name and they’ll be there.

- and because i just had to.... love languages

- lets start with Xiao- i don’t think he’d view acts of service or quailty time as a love language tbh, and he blunt but really bad with words so affirmation is out, leaving gift giving and physical touch. However, he seems to view most material things as meaningless so- - Xiao who’s love language is in his fleeting touches, something he’s only recently grown comfortable with because of Venti, and now is giving back, which he knows he doesn’t have to do, but that he want’s to, though he’ll still continue to make excuses for each one. “you were shivering” “The inn is high up, you could have fallen..... I said what I said, you’d question an adeptus?”

- and as easy as it is to say words of affirmation for Venti- he does that for everyone- i want to say his is actually acts of service - its the acts of service that let him see just how much Xiao has progressed afterall, from teaching him to dance, to playing another song on the flute, to supplying him with the almond tofu he seems to enjoy so much. Every little thing he does helps Xiao to grow and he couldn’t be happier about that. 

-

- of course most of my headcanons for the ship do take place latter into the relationship because- y’know the less serious unhealthy vibes allow for greater range of thought, but i do still love to think about the serious implications so i kinda hopped back and forth. So sorry about how messy it is btw, i kinda- got carried away- it kinda got some kind of structure near the end tho so- maybe it’s okay. anyway- back to... lol something, we’ll see where thought forests lead. 

[quibblesandscribbles]

Centaurworld Rewrite: A Serious Adventure AU - S1E1 Outline

I’m doing rewrite outlines, prepare for some AU. That being said, I still like several parts of Centaurworld a lot, namely Rider, Horse, Wammawink, and whatever the hell is going on with the Nowhere King, and hope there’s a second season to watch (which I will if Netflix doesn’t ruin our hopes and dreams).

Anyways, here’s like, a rewrite or whatever. I will probably post the outlines as I go, episode by episode. Will I get to them all? ADHD-willing, we’ll see. Also feel free to use these ideas/outlines? I don’t mind. 

Also assume there are songs in this even if I don’t specifically mention all of them. Also I guess this rewrite kinda chains the 1st and 2nd episodes together as a two parter? Maybe, idk.

Also I’ll preface this with this too: I ship Wammahorse, yes I SHIPSHIP it. Moving on.

Some headcanons before we start:

Warworld (*the world Rider and Horse are from) is a Low Fantasy Setting, there IS magic, but it comes in two variations, either very subtle low-powered but relatively uncommon, or Terrifyingly Powerful and so extremely rare to the point that it’s not very well known and “just myths” (usually for Big Baddies)

Ideas for Horse’s Degree of Sapience Prior to Worldhopping:

A: Horse was just a regular, non-magical horse, and their exposure to the Artifact and Centaurworld has essentially made them a Fully Uplifted Animal. - This is interesting, but ultimately a difficult idea to convey because it would require a lot more setup and wouldn’t exactly fit Horse’s characterization without some rework. This is an amazing idea, but I won’t be using it because it would slow things down too much.

B: Horse is a low-fantasy magic steed raised as warhorse/war asset, who is much smarter than your average animal steed/companion similar to a DND Ranger’s pets, or Mabari from Dragon Age, or a Ranger Horse from John Flanagan’s ‘Ranger’s Apprentice.’ The combined exposure to the Artifact and Centaurworld could account for her gaining speech and her body expressing limited physical adaptation to Centaurworld’s different physics (her body’s new extended range of motion for example) but of course I’ll be limiting this because having stakes make it more fun imho. This is my favorite, I’m using this.

Horse would’ve been considered a very valuable war asset (trained warhorses are like, historical ferraris, expensive as hell, i can only imagine what low-magical smart warhorses would be valued at), though still ultimately expendable for the war effort like anything else

Let Horse have horse behaviors (*can you tell I haven’t really left my horse phase behind lol)! Nipping and grooming behaviors as affection or warnings, ear positions to indicate mood, grazing to eat, laying down only when truly relaxed, sleeping standing up. COME ON.

Centaurworld is a High Fantasy world with an Absurdist bent but with darker undertones, similar to how Adventure Time is, with an extremely high saturation of magic, maybe you could even theorize that due to the Splitting of the Two Worlds that all the magic is being Dammed up in Centaurworld like a river or reservoir, this could be a future plot thread that could be picked up in a later season.

Basic Changes: 

Durpleton, Glendale, Ched and Zulius are supporting cast, not main

Durpleton is less stupid and more of a Kronk-expy: a little dim but ultimately kind/means well, has at least 1 life skill he’s good at buried in there though for the life of me I can’t think of one right now.

Glendale’s Narrative Framing: Glendale is amazing, but the kleptomania will be allotted ONE (or two) joke mentions but narratively isn’t treated like one after, somehow establish that her kleptomania is directly intertwined with her anxiety levels. Are there other denizens of the Valley that know the Herd? Are they mad at Glendale for stealing things? Does Wammawink have to constantly run interference to cover for Glendale? Probably.

Make Ched look like less of a pointless asshole: Have him show concern for his friends’ safety and his suspicion of outsiders, AKA Horse. If he’s going to be a jerk, at least let it serve a purpose.

Zulius can stay roughly the same - Zulius is great okay, just don’t tell me there’s backstory and then NOT TELL OR SHOW US ANY CLUES about what said backstory/history IS! (other than forcing us infer/project the headcanon[?] that him and Splendib might’ve been exes, from how they act around each other without any other context/visual/or confirming exposition we literally know nothing other than Splendib and him split/had a nasty falling out and Splendib took the glittercats and the career in the divorce.)

S1E1: Hello Rainbow Road

Opening scene in Warworld

If these episodes were allowed to be longer (shuddup it’s my AU), have the scene open with Horse sees Rider comes running out of some underground castle ruin catacombs and ominous roaring and clanging behind her as she deliberately sets off a dungeon booby trap (arrows or fire) she must’ve avoided while dungeon crawling earlier, and Horse runs towards her and circles at a canter and then Rider does a Running Mount (mounting a horse while the horse is in motion) and shoots an arrow at that flies offscreen

Smash cut to the DRAWBRIDGE door falling and Rider and Horse come galloping out while dodging some javelins and arrows and 1.5 seconds later 1-4 armored minotaurs (the lizardmen?) riding some coursers (swift horses or horselike creatures idk have fun) gallop behind in hot pursuit.

WARWORLD CHASE/FIGHT SCENE

Rider and Horse take out 2 of the pursuers on the run have Rider stay on horseback, dodge and make 1 pursuer shoot/javelin another 1 into a nasty-looking fall, and then Rider nails another 1 right through the helmet visor with an arrow. Have Rider throw a smoke bomb or something at the 2 remaining ones trying to catch up.

2 Enemies left but Horse is forced to skid to a stop as the suspension bridge approaches, then a tense moment forced to walk in order to escape safely across the suspension bridge which Rider cuts once they’re across. Maybe have 1 of the minotaur pursuers having been on the bridge somewhat behind them before Rider had to cut the line, sending the enemy hurtling down below. The remaining minotaur scout stares at them ominously from the other side before leaving.

Have Rider breath a sigh of relief

Smash cut to Horse and Rider traveling across a wartorn landscape, start Horse’s internal monologue narrative until they finally get to the hill and see the ruins of their village

Everything from this point to Horse getting transported to Centaurworld is the same as canon

Not Actually a DREAMVISION SEQUENCE: 

Shot/Animated from Horse’s 1st Person POV: Darkness, the sound of whooshing Horse falls, shimmering flash colors [if this were an actual show pls put a Epilepsy warning at the beginning of the ep], then a loud Splash as Horse falls into Dark Water. POV looks down and we see Horse’s front legs and a bottomless abyss below and a then flash of green and off-white from deep below, then look up to see blue light, see the swimming motions of Horse’s front legs and getting closer to the Blue Light

Horse wakes up, blinking, alone (no Durpleton)

Horse gets up looks around, doesn’t see Rider anywhere and starts makes Whinnying sounds (specifically, Whinnying is a social horse call, like specifically going, “Rider where are you!?” in IRL horse)

“And what are you supposed to be?” the “camera” wheels around to see Ched who has landed on Horse just within reach of her tail so Horse lets out a startled squeal (the Horse noise, not the human one) and does that thing where horses use their tails to swat away insects which sends Ched FLYING as Horse’s squealing morphs into her Talking/Yelling “what the heck is going on?!”

Horse does what panicked horses do, she runs

Horse stumbles into meeting Durpleton, who freaks her out more

Meeting kinda the same as canon but with less constant emphasis on reminding the audience that the writer’s can’t write comedy

Wammawink and Horse meet, Ched flies in and goes “hey that asshole kicked my a-I mean attacked me, but I totally beat ‘em.”

Horse tries to leave, discovers the Barrier, tries to get through, fails multiple times, but only 3-4 attempts shown with time passage show by the time of day changing, have Horse’ talking to herself a bit about how utterly weird the talking words thing is, that this is a “human” thing why is this HAPPENING she needs to get back

Waste less time on the visual gags of the Barrier repelling Horse, also get rid of the Tree Catapult scene because it doesn’t jive with Horse being a horse, why do they know how to make a catapult? Also because I hate how it basically shows us that Horse has no physical danger or chance of injury from being FLUNG around like Pokemon’s Team Rocket.

Have the rest of the centaur Herd come up to and talk to Horse while Horse is trying to get through the Barrier, and Horse talks about the outside and her world and doing things, squeeze in some convo about how there’s no (current) war in Centaurworld and how Horse thinks that that “freedom must be nice.” Anyways these conversations are what has Glendale, Zulius and Durpleton at least considering the ups of leaving.

Durpleton: Durpleton approaches Horse alone and asks about where she’s from, what’s home like, expositiony bits for Warworld and how much Horse needs to get herself and the Artifact back to Rider; Horse should say something offhand, like how she dreamed about exploring the world with Rider after the War seeing new things together, to which we’d cut to a shot of Durpleton looking thoughtful, before asking a completely unrelated question before Horse asks to be left alone. He doesn’t go originally, but gets distracted by something (butterfly?) and trots off.

Wammawink, Ched & Glendale: Atop a hill, Wammawink looks up to see stormclouds gathering off in the distance and comments that they’re going to be in for some rough weather, then goes over to offer Horse food, but gets distracted by some other Valley Denizens who are mad suspicious that Glendale is responsible for something of theirs that’s missing. Leaving Wammawink to go off and have to run interference leaving Glendale to approach Horse alone. Horse will learn that there’s no (current) war in Centaurworld but there was one historically, and Glendale will offhandedly mention that they’ve stolen everything from everyone in the Valley at least 4 times and with the unspoken implication of boredom. Ched will butt in and heckle Horse like, “could you leave any quieter?” and Horse sniping back, ears pinned back and animated horse stress behaviors. And Horse’s last failed attempt at passing the Barrier has them drop the Artifact, and we get a shot of Glendale spotting and eyes widening at seeing the Artifact unattended on the ground, then we get a smash cut of Glendale getting herded away by Ched.

Zulius: Goes over to ask about Horse’s avante garde accessories (her bridle, saddle & armor[barding]), makes comments on her style/aesthetic and asks where he could find some. Horse loses her patience, and says that she Needs to concentrate on getting back to someone they care a lot about and could you please just go away? 

Horse: (voiced as a rhetorical question) “Haven’t you ever wanted to go back to someone you loved before?”

Zulius gets a Look on his face, then he’d puff up, cover up the Armor Piercing Question’s effect on him with more bluster and then turn away as it gets later

Around sunset, Horse finally gives in to go ask Wammawink what’s up, and how can they leave.

Wammawink tries to feed them and convince them to stay, but Horse waves her off and moves away while muttering something about coming up with a plan

Speaking of plans, the Herd excluding Wammawink (& Ched) start talking about being bored, and mention Horse saying stuff about exploring the world (taken out of context, deliberately)

Wammawink, smelling the ugly head of discontent, sighs in defeat at not being able to recruit this new outcast in the Herd and approaches a grazing Horse and says she’ll help her through it with her magic(not admitting that the Barrier is her magic working in the first place because it’s not relevant right now okay) but then we get the “What’s magic?” bit from Horse and the rest of the Herd butts in with the Song. They wander off to go to bed afterwards, and Horse wants to go Now but Wammawink says that she’ll help Horse leave the Barrier but only in the morning because “you look tired”

Horse: “That doesn’t matter.” *awkward silence*

Wammawink, sadly: “Of course it does.” *Horse has already walked away*

The sun finishes setting as the wind blows the plants and through Wammawink’s fur (ominously) and she shivers, going back to the campfire

DREAM SEQUENCE: It’s dark, then we get a flashback dream of a younger Rider and Horse, idk a memory of something to showcase them either while in training or really show their Bond okay? End with them sitting around a campfire with other young soldiers and horses, someone is humming something (the first few bars of the Nowhere King’s Lullaby, no actual words yet). Then Dream!Rider turns to face Horse and asks, “how could you?”

Horse: “How could I what?”

Dream!Rider: “How could you leave me behind?” (The humming grows louder, there’s a lute being played, growing discordant)

Then Horse starts calling into the darkness/void, “I’m coming back for you, Rider! Just hang on, alright?!”

Rider: “Oh Horse, it’s already too late for me.”

“Rider!” Horse yells as they jolt awake, standing, because horses typically sleep standing up.

It’s dawn but the wind and stormy weather signs are picking up but not here yet, Wammawink walks Horse to the edge of the Valley barrier and tries to convince Horse to stay here where it’s safe, but Horse refuses to be deterred

Brief shot of Glendale hiding a bunch of things from her Tummy Hammerspace in order to simulate the feeling of stealing things again later, including the Artifact which falls on the ground

A shot of Durpleton seeing and picking up the Artifact and spotting Wammawink and Horse some distance away going toward the barrier’s edge

Wammawink hangs back on a hill, glowy hands and the magic wall flickers and disappears, and Horse immediately breaks into a gallop and disappears into the forest, Wammawink sighs and turns away

Indeterminate amount of time later, Wammawink recasts the Barrier, and Durpleton misses breakfast so Wammawink enlists Ched to help her look for him because Ched can fly

Cut to a shot of Horse dropping from a canter to a trot on the Rainbow Road, it’s grown darker and the stormclouds are in the sky. Distant thunder booms overhead, and a few scattered raindrops start to fall

“Heyyyy! You forgot your necklaceeee!” a shout from behind

Horse looks back and sees a running Durpleton holding the Artifact, and stops, he catches up to Horse and is gasping, “Wow, you run fast, hoooo, *deep breaths* you’re really *another gasp* athletic! Anyways you forgot your Necklace.”

Durpleton ties the broken string into a necklace around Horse’s neck and Horse thanks them and wishes them a safe journey back to the Valley, but as this happens the rain gradually falls harder. Then the sounds of the Rest of the Herd finally catching up happen, and Wammawink mother hens Durpleton and wants take everyone back home but then a loud BOOM of thunder and lightning overhead, and then it starts to Pour down rain, forcing Horse and co to find shelter until it lets up. Maybe have someone mention something about landslides being a possibility? Durpleton asks how they found them so fast, dim remember, then brief flashback.

FLASHBACK: Wammawink and co searching and calling out for Durpleton everywhere in the Valley, and realize that he must’ve followed Horse for some reason when Zulius FINALLY shows up and mentions that he remembers Durpleton saying he was gonna give Horse back her necklace. The recast Barrier is brought down and they leave the Valley to bring back their friend.

Back to the present where the group has taken shelter as the storm picks up more, and thunder booms overhead, Horse has some nervous horse body language going on, then we get to hear her mutter-singing or humming the “I never fear the drums of war” to calm herself down, but with more stanzas please, when asked she says it’s a battle hymn that Rider sang.

If Horse was humming, Wammawink could ask why she doesn’t sing, she’s sure that Horse has a lovely voice

Horse goes “I’m a horse, I don’t sing.”

Wammawink tries to be encouraging, Horse is resistant

Wammawink invites her to eat (AGAIN) but Horse still turns her (love and affection) down (AGAIN!) and says she’s fine with grazing and Glendale pipes in excitedly that they have decided that they want to travel with Horse (Ched pipes up that he didn’t agree to this) but pls help us convince Wammawink and Horse protests but someone points out to ask “do you even know where you’re going” and they have a point

Horse acknowledges this and relents, states some stuff about how she’s not going to slow down much however. Then Glendale, Zulius and Durpleton rejoice, Ched acts tsundere, but Wammawink looks nervous and wrings her hands together and relents that “they’ll go with Horse as far as the nearest Shaman” and Ched will go, “hey don’t you know he-” and Wammawink shushes him quickly with a gigglecake

Wammawink doubles down on the mother henning behavior

Horse doesn’t eat Wammawink’s gigglecakes but grazes by herself nearby, occasionally answering a question or two when engaged by the others (not Wammawink) and Wammawink mentions how the weather probably won’t let up for very long and they should take it slow and that Horse should bundle up

Horse disagrees but its bedtime and a bedtime song occurs in the backdrop as a restless Horse struggles to stay alert and awake but eventually falls asleep

VISION SEQUENCE: A shimmer of soft blue light, then shots of Rider ducking and weaving, her sword flashing as she tries to weave her way through a horde of enemy soldiers, blood spatters, then an enemy archer takes aim at a fleeing Rider, and Horse calls out a warning. 

Rider turns her head with a surprised look on her face suddenly just enough that the arrow buries itself into her shoulder instead the middle of her back and then she stumbles, one of her arms going limp, but everything goes dark before we can see if she fell

Everything goes dark and the din of war fades away, we get a shot of Horse’s hooves splashing and making ripples into dark water but the camera doesn’t follow her, we hear Horse’s cries for Rider fade, growing further and further away

Still dark, but in the silence we hear distant sound, drip, drip, drip, drip.

Then the episode ends and the credits roll.

[bigskydreaming]

William Cobb is a total asshat and I hate him, thanks, BUT I will admit there’s a particular AU that’s been dancing around my Brain Cave for a few years that’s like.....hmmm.

Okay, so he’s a full on douchebag, but imagine if he was a full on douchebag who in this AU did still have an actual soft spot for family instead of drinking the Kool-Aid and thinking like ‘being the 1%’s elite murder moppet is actually the greatest honor I could ever hope for myself or any descendant of mine’ he’s like.....not awful about the subject of family and is like ‘well I’M a terrible person, but I will fight for my family’s right to choose to not be a terrible person, because like, they’re family, and its their life to fuck up if they want to be all weird about it or whatever.’

So BASICALLY, what I’m getting at is like, so, the Court was all into nabbing the Gray Son after Dick’s parents died, and William Cobb for once in his miserable existence experienced like, actual Internal Conflict about this because he’s like oh nooooo, but my great grandson is so cute actually and I can speak with some authority to the fact that if the Court gets their hands or requisite-Talons-pun on him, that like.....will not last long.

But then he breathes an undead sigh of relief or whatever the equivalent for him is when Bruce Wayne, one of the most powerful figures in the city, powerful enough for the Court to be wary about picking a fight with him, like, randomly swoops in and makes with the adopting of said great grandson.

And the Court’s like, ugh, what is this feeling of being denied something we want simply because we think we should have it? Do Not Like, 10/10 would absolutely NOT recommend, except to mortal enemies we hate. But whatever. I GUESS Bruce Wayne can keep the brat, but only because we simply don’t care enough to make a big deal about it and definitely not because we’re intimidated by his own power and family prestige. Cuz we’re totally not. We’re not! Shut up.

BUT.

THEN.

YEARS LATER.

The Court is engaged in active conflict with the Batfamily, and his Internal Conflict appeased and years behind him, Cobb’s like, all into the fight and giving it his all, until Something Plot Contrivey happens to unmask Nightwing and Cobb’s like. Oh shit. That’s my great grandson. CURSE YOU, SUDDEN BUT INEVITABLE RESURGENCE OF INTERNAL CONFLICT! NOBODY FUCKING ASKED, JEEZ.

And Dick’s just like.....uh, what’s happening right now? I feel like I’m missing context. Can a bitch get an MLA citation here or something?

All of this culminating in Cobb maybe not HELPING the Batfam demolish the Court but perhaps at least oh so conveniently not NOT helping when the Batfam delivers a metaphorical death blow to the Court O’Assholes. Like, the Grandmaster dipshit calls him on his celly to be like COBB! THE COURT HAS BEEN BREACHED! COME DEFEND YOUR MASTERS and Cobb’s like bzzrt....click....whrrrr....sorry going through a tunnel can’t hear you oh no dropped my phone in the sewers, signal lost, much regret.

And he just happens to arrive to the fight too late to change the outcome and he’s like oh dang, did I miss it? Shucks, I KNEW I shouldn’t have taken the freeway. My bad, guys. This one’s on me.

Because of Plot Contrivancey then, by this point the Batfam knows who this dude is and they let him go with a shovel talk like we still know about all the murder, FYI, and we’re doing this for Dick’s sake not yours, so you better not do ANY murder from here on out or its on sight.

And Cobb’s like okay first off, you’re not the fucking boss of me, but secondly, like, eh, whatever. I’m fucking old. I can retire. Its fine.

BUT because being a lying liar who lies about just kicking back and taking it easy and having hobbies is literally encoded into the Grayson DNA, he fucking lies like a lying liar who lies, and after trying to pick up fly fishing for like, two whole hours before calling it quits, he decides to devote his undead golden years to stalking his great-grandson like the creepiest guardian angel that literally nobody ever asked for. Dick included.

Dick keeps trying to like, Old Yeller this situation and is like GO HOME! You GO home now! Go on! But Cobb’s just not having it and he accidentally kills another up-and-coming Rogue who sets his sights on Nightwing. Great-Grandson and Great-Grandpa engage in heated stare-off, Battle of The Wills. Batman arrives and clears his throat menacingly. Cobb’s like oh no I’m so scared, I would totally be sweating right now if I weren’t physiologically incapable of sweating and oh yeah DYING.

And then its Cobb and Bruce engaging in the Battle of the Wills: Grudge Match edition, because they’re both glaring each other down while thinking the identical thoughts of “ugh the literal worst person in the world made one point and one point only and that’s that we must protect this mutually loved person at all costs and taking each other down would ultimately only deprive said loved one of a protector who could like, be key in protecting him from some future Murder Demise or whatnot” which segues neatly into both Bruce and Cobb shaking their fists at the sky and being all CURSE YOU, SUDDEN BUT INEVITABLE RESURGENCE OF INTERNAL CONFLICT! NOBODY FUCKING ASKED, JEEZ.

And Dick’s like, okay I can see you’re both very busy right now and this is no longer about me really so I’m just gonna leave you to it and go get ice cream with Damian. I’ll check back in a couple of hours to see if either of you has blinked yet, I guess? Idk. Whatever. You guys do you.

“My family is so fucking weird,” he grumbles under his breath as he walks off into the sunset. His siblings apparate into his presence, mouths open and ready to argue the comparative greater weirdness of their grafted branch of the Wayne family tree and he’s just like first person to bust out a flow-chart isn’t getting any ice cream, FYI, but because they’re all the kids of a billionaire who can be counted on to give them some spending money of a few hundred or so with just a puppy eyes look and a “why yes, Bruce, a hundred dollars IS the price of one banana,” like, they are not actually phased by this threat and it all swiftly devolves into ‘Whose Relatives Are Like, The WORST Worst’ competition that nobody will ever win, not that that actually matters.  

Its like, the Wayne Family Forever War. Just family tradition at this point. You get it.