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prlssprfctn · 5 months ago

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Give me Bruce and Jason, who are not on the war path anymore, but they are still awkward and absolutely clueless on how to make things up, so they pretend that they need something from each other in order to spend some time together. Even if these things are absolutely simple, and both of them could handle it themselves, if they wanted to.

Bruce, calling Jason in the random Friday night: So, Alfred left for a week. And I promised kids to do a homemade cake for them. And you know how useless I am in the kitchen. So.

Jason, who knows that Bruce is, in fact, not useless in the kitchen, but low-key misses cooking with him, because the last time they did it, it was Alfred's birthday before his death, and they did the cake together: Theoretically, I agree.

Bruce, sighing in relief: Theoretically, I will need you in Manor tomorrow in the morning. And I theoretically will pay for that.

Jason: Theoretically, see you tomorrow.

Bruce: Theoretically, thank you.

Jason, dealing Bruce in the middle of the night: Old man. Bail me out of the prison. I am in CGDP's building.

Bruce, knowing well that Jason wouldn't be caught in the first place, if he didn't want all of this to happen, and even if he did, he would easily escape without him, getting involved, but also knowing that today is anniversary of the day Bruce adopted Jason, and it is his way to spend time together: ...Okay. May I ask what did you do?

Jason: ...Stole Gordon's tires.

Bruce, stifling his laughter: I see. I will be here in a few minutes.

#Tim: don't you just love when your dad&bro can't communicate so you help your father to break the Batmobile so he could call Jason for help #Dick: yeah also a big fan of that one thing when you literally witness your lil bro feigning an injury to come home for a checkup #Damian: ...we were suppoused to pretend that he is truly injured? i just stabbed him the last time so he could come home #jason todd #red hood #dcu comics #dc universe #dcu #batman #batfamily #bruce wayne #batfam

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blaqcats-fics · 5 months ago

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been thinking about jason being petty towards bruce. like, oh, you spend time with your other kids, but not me? tire privileges revoked! it would be over stupid shit too.

like there’s one time bruce decides to take damien to the movies, and jason is just beside himself.

like the conversation would be like:

JASON: So, let me get this straight—you took Damian to a movie.

BRUCE: He asked.

JASON: Oh, and I wouldn’t have wanted to see Kung Fu Panda 4 with you?!

BRUCE: You were busy.

JASON: Busy taking down a cartel. Which, by the way, I learned from you. I deserve quality time!

BRUCE: Jason—

JASON: No. No excuses. You’ll learn.

Jason storms off. Five minutes later, an alert pops up on the Batcomputer.

BATCOMPUTER: Warning: Batmobile rear tires have been removed.

BRUCE: …Jason.

Cut to Jason outside, rolling two Batmobile tires away, cackling.

#this isn’t the last time jason steals the tires #bruce keeps doing stuff with the other batkids #and Jason is like look at this opportunity #like imagining if tim gets arrested for something bc i mean come on tims a menace #then bruce just bails tim out and just the week before jason was arrested and bruce let him sit in jail for like two days #jason blew up something so like bad jason #either way jason is like i warned you batbitch and he steals the tires from the batmobile again and then who knows what happens to the tires #unfortunately it gets worse #bc bruce then takes dick to a fancy ass dinner #and it’s to one of Jason’s favorite stakehouses #Like it was the only fancy food place he could stand #good steak is good steak #and jason’s like this is crossing a line #so instead of stealing the tires again #he just takes the entire batmobile #how? no one knows #no one sees the batmobile again or the tires #at least until Batman gets a call from various members of the JL asking him why pieces of the batmobile have been popping up in the city #however it’s about the car itself #no one knows where the tires are still #jason calling Oliver up and saying like i don’t like you man but like we both don’t like batman want his tires?#jason todd #bruce wayne #dick grayson #tim drake #dc universe #batman #batfamily #batfam #damian wayne

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occudo · 14 days ago

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A fish out of water...

Did you know that in every story, even if they marry, the selkie is still longing to go back to the sea?

But at least he has a siren husband who can sing for him.

more of them

#occudo's art #tma fanart #martin blackwood #jonathan sims #selkie!martin #siren!jon #not me making the funny fairy-tale au sad for myself #btw the sea isn't singing a creepy way!#I just think Martin would miss #the calling voice of the place #where he first felt at home #and the feeling that maybe one day #he could understand how his mother felt #even if he knows it's not the same #and jon is all don't go where I can't follow we just got here #but I don't think he could ever put his feelings into worlds #so he sings

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egophiliac · 9 months ago

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still ruminating over Lost In the Book With Spooky Skeletons Part 1, so here's a selection of some of my favorite little bits! (...some more loosely paraphrased than others) (I just feel like Idia has no room to criticize in general, okay)

anyway, I'm sure we're just going to have a fun time celebrating Halloween and nothing bad is going to happen whatsoever! :)

#art #twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland spoilers #lost in the book with nightmare before christmas #hajimari no halloween #calling dibs on skeleton kisses as the name of my band #man scully is just a delightful little weirdo and i'm enjoying him immensely #(i'm going with scully until we get something official just because it makes me think of x-files)#(スカリー is also how the agent's name is transliterated and i don't know if it was intentional but i love it as a bonus reference)#(i want to believe™)#gosh though #'no one at school likes me because i won't shut up about halloween and jack skellington' i'm feeling VERY attacked right now twst #look scully your people are out there #just get on the forums and -- oh wait you're probably from like the 1800s or something #(my theory is that he's from the past and there's just some Book Magic going on to bring us together)#(LOOK they made a point of saying that the book fair has been held annually for a super long time)#a hot topic goth born before hot topic was invented...so sad 😔#i dunno i could be wrong but that feels like a good working theory for now #if it wasn't for mal sensing twsty ~magic~ on him i would think he's like. a christmas elf who's going to kidnap jack in a reverse-nmbc #(not ruling that out though because it would be amazing)#god all the sprites in this event look AMAZING. loving the desaturated colors and the extra drawn-on lines 😍#i'm genuinely kinda sad that we aren't gonna get to see every character like this #who knows...maybe halloweentown will be imperiled again next year...#come back and destroy my keys again please #(that said i'm doing weirdly well so far?)#(i promised i'd save for sebek and just do cursory pulls to get the SRs and not hope for the SSRs)#(...but then leona jumpscared me four coffins in anyway. halloween magic is REAL)

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elbiotipo · 5 months ago

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I honestly cannot phantom what could make a man hear "we need to bomb civilians" and call it a "legitimate argument".

#cosas mias #because he doesn't see them as people #only a US president could hear 'well you used a nuclear bomb' and say 'you're right we did it wasn't that bad'#todos los días me despierto leo las noticias entre que laburo y Biden dice algo así #he also called Netanyahu his 'dear friend'

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clumsypuppy · 1 year ago

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thanks @chipper-smol for getting me ISAT i will be so irresponsible with the looping

#the real reason why you arent allowed to do this in game is because the dev knew we'd be nowhere close to finish it if we could #too much power and not enough responsibility etc etc. i dont even know if siffrin would want to stop looping once he figures out he can #do this. “stardust do you want to get out of the fucking loop or not stop smothering yourself on the fighters jugs” LMAOOO #i havent played it yet bc im gonna go in blind and stream it on call so 3 other ppl can watch me cry like a weenie in real time #my art #myart #in stars and time #isat #isat isabeau #isat siffrin #isabeau #siffrin #in stars and time fanart #isat fanart #isafrin #shitpost #i am. so fucking sorry

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nedlittle · 7 months ago

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#ice ice baby #polls #pls rb i want a good sample size #we can't ALL die of scurvy it's not mathematically possible! someone has to succumb to exposure!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#also i could have included sooooo many more medical ailments i am being restrained #it could be its own separate poll #anyway so many of these are me and i would love to die of some horrible disease but i would fall into a crevasse #i do not look where i walk and there have been multiple occasions in my life where i have unintentionally climbed into a ravine & got stuck #one of which i had to us tree roots to climb up a rock face and i should have fallen and died #the other option was getting washed away by the tide lmao #and i was too embarrassed to call my boss for help #hi andrea can you send a boat to come get me i'm stuck at the bottom of hole in the wall and can't get back up #greatest (s)hits

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octagava · 4 months ago

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Scarabia-kun couldn't help but fall in love.

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composeregg · 9 months ago

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edit (10/23/2024) now that the poll is over: Original version, with 10 questions, from April 2023 here

And, given that the original is from April 2023, that means I can very easily say:

No, this was not an ISAT reference!

Just because I use parentheses and 2nd person pov and love the same concepts of what a time loop can do to a person doesn't mean it's ISAT

(Yes, I like ISAT, the original poll is why I was recommended the game! But if you look at the original, you can see all the origins of the options to choose from, including what spurred me on with the moss option from the replies)

If I were going to make something for ISAT, I would never be so vague, you can simply look at my ao3 for proof of that

#egg speaks #writing #polls #my writing #egg writes #my polls #poetry #time loops #listen I want to run this again #time loop poll #<- check that tag on my blog for the original 10 option version lmao #unreality #you know I didn't think I'd get fed up with people making isat jokes about this #I thought it'd be like oh hey neat same hat #we both like the same game #but people keep going “oh this is JUST an ISAT reference”#as if it's not a genuine work of creativity I did myself. it feels a bit devaluing #“op you played isat” yes but that came after the original!!!!!#I KNOW it's not meant like that but I want people to engage in my work as its own thing. you can make jokes about similar media!!!#but this is it's own thing!!!!#I want people to like it for what it is. I want people to enjoy it outside of other media. I want it to stand on its own #I'm flattered someone said it was good enough that they think it could be narration from the game and read just as well!!!!#but like. idk. all the other medias popping up (pmmm. orv. higurashi. etc) aren't people calling it a /reference/#if I wanted it to be an ISAT reference I would have tagged it originally. I would have targeted it toward ISAT fans more intentionally.#I love fanworks but this was an ode to time loops alone. I wanted people to think. to have to CHOOSE. I wanted PARTICIPATION #time loops as a narrative and as horror and as a group activity via polls on tumblr. also s/o to the person who said 40 hr work week so tru

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prlssprfctn · 1 month ago

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I will forgive DC for not using All-Blades stuff on Jason, only if they give me a comedy little run, where the family finds out that he is a fucking chosen one, because the half of the world tries to reach for his help in magic stuff, which he ignores — so they are forced to beg Bruce to affect his son, somehow.

Bruce: Hey, John. Long time no see. What happened?

John Constantine, tired as fuck: I need you to ask Jason to pick the goddamn phone.

Dick: Is he wanted in LA, too?

John Constantine: Wanted? Guy is having a fucking blast. Do you know how many people need the Chosen One's assistance?

Damian — who actually knows it, so he is not surprised — scoffing: Todd? Assistance?

Tim, who knows as much as Bruce and Dick, which means nothing: Jason? THE CHOSEN ONE?

Bruce, catching Jason near the fridge in three in the morning: Jason? When were you going to tell us that you were chosen to... restore the balance between good and bad, and had magical swords?

Jason, chewing on dry cereals while skimming through the book: Like what, was it hard?

#Roy: man wtf who is calling you so often atp i could shove your phone down my ass and use it as a you-know-what #Jason: oh. there is a magical crisis lmaoooo they want help #Roy: WHY ARE YOU SITTING HERE THEN #Jason: are you dumb? we are in the middle of the movie geez #Roy: ???#jason todd #red hood #batman #dcu #dcu comics #dc universe #batfamily #bruce wayne #batfam #dick grayson #tim drake #damian wayne #john constantine

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fantastic-nonsense · 9 months ago

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insane how Red Robin is "the loner Tim Drake book" when he had friends and family just popping out of the woodwork like daisies asking him to come home and enjoy hugs like he used to 😭

#tim drake #red robin #batman #batfam #dc comics #steph cassie dick kon that whole screen of phone calls he ignored....#Tam literally RUNNING INTO THE DESERT after him because Lucius was worried #the way YJ and ALL the active Gotham heroes came out to foil Ra's' plan #M'gann randomly showing up JUST to help Tim fake his attempted assassination to Vicki Vale #the regular Dick-Tim-Damian teamups. The Tim-Steph teamups #Bruce popping in just so we could get that Bruce-Tim hug splash page #the way the book brought Lonnie back specifically to team him up with Tim #insane levels of 'COME HOME WE MISS YOU!!!' happening in that comic

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meowmeowriley · 8 months ago

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Soap comes back to base after having teeth pulled and is not expecting Ghost to pounce the second he gets through the gate.

Ghost: "So where are they? I wanna see."

Soap: "What?"

Ghost: "The teeth. Gimme"

Soap: "I didn't... keep them?"

Ghost, upset: "They didn't let you?"

Soap, growing more confused by the second: "I didn't ask?"

Ghost: "You didn't- Johnny what the fuck?" 😟