#monty python won’t save us

[corrodedghosts]

i have been working nonstop on my gallavich apocalypse au and i just wanted to share a snippet of one of my favorite scenes

~~~

“Think we could have a life here?” Ian asked, sitting down next to Mickey, his legs hanging off the roof of the house the two had claimed as their own. In his hand, he held a bottle of beer, the sides of his middle and ring finger on its neck.

“Maybe,” Mickey said, taking the beer from Ian and chuckling when the redhead began to pout. He took a swig before sighing and leaning his head on Ian’s shoulder, the boy instantly wrapping an arm around his waist. “Depends if the dead stop walking.”

Ian let out a sigh. “If I’m honest, I don’t think they will,” he admitted, leaning his head against Mickey’s. “I believe in Lip. I believe in those fuckers down in Atlanta, but it’s been what, almost a year now? If they had something, I’m sure word would have gotten to us somehow.”

“Yeah. Somehow,” Mickey said, taking another swig of the beer before carelessly throwing it down on the ground below. He watched as it fell and shattered, a small flame of satisfaction rising in his belly at the noise when it reached his ears. “I don’t think we can ever truly be safe,” he said, his chest tightening as he finally spoke the words he had wanted to say for days. The words that started playing in his head over and over again the moment Mandy turned. “As much as I want to believe in a cure, I don’t think there will be one.”

“What makes you say that?” Ian inquired.

“From a scientific standpoint, the fuckers need to be fresh, right? As you said before, the virus has been affecting the world for almost a year. It’s probably been evolving rapidly, and there’s no way to pinpoint the original strain. How are the assholes in the lab able to tell the difference between the new strains and the old ones? Hell, are any of the dead from the beginning of the outbreak still walking?”

~~

please be aware that this is still a work in progress. i’m working on getting it all completed by july at the latest :-)

[i-got-bad-knees]

Some notable moments from the show (an evening with Bob Odenkirk, guest hosted by David Baddiel) on Monday:

Mike was created because Bob couldn’t shoot a fourth ep due to HIMYM conflicting, he commented that it ended up making a lot more sense because “Saul would never move a body”

Said Saul’s only real “human” (Jimmy) moments in BrBa in his opinion were 1. When he tries to encourage Jesse to go talk to Andrea and Brock rather than waiting in the car, he said “there’s no incentive or benefit for Saul, he won’t make any money and it’s a risk for Jesse to be seen” (imo Jimmy more than Saul speaks to Brock and Andrea anyway) and 2. When he’s telling Walt to just quit while he’s ahead, because “Saul doesn’t care, he doesn’t care if this guy dies or if he’s family dies, why should he?”

Said the Saul hair (“combover on top, mullet in the back”) was his idea after reading the script

His agent apparently told him “please do not say no” to breaking bad and his response was “well I’m gonna” and he turned to us and continued “because that’s how I am, I’m difficult”

The first scene he shot was the Walt and Jesse in the desert scene, he said it was during a sandstorm which didn’t pick up on camera but every time they opened their mouths they were full of sand.

The desert scene with Mike took 14 “gruelling” days to shoot, out in the ABQ desert.

They had a snake wrangler on to clear any areas they were filming in (and obtain a snake if one was needed) but during the desert trek they didn’t come across a single snake in the entire 14 days and the wrangler said it was because it was too hot. For the desert snakes.

His heart attack occurred during the Lalo/mcwexler confrontation scene in the final season, and parts of it are from after his recovery months later. It’s been said a lot, but hearing Bob personally say out loud that he was “out” for 15 minutes and that his training for Nobody saved his life (which he explained how and why in detail) was Wild. I lost my dad due to heart complications, I’m really glad he was able to pull through.

David didn’t know about the heart attack, he was taken aback and stated Bob looked “damn good” and we all applauded

He essentially confirmed that Kim likes Jimmy because she’s also insane. He said it in a very roundabout way (“they’re both damaged, weird loners” and “she hides it better but she was more into it than him at times” lmao) but that was the gist.

Credits Giancarlo Esposito as perhaps the best actor he’s ever worked with and spoke about the wine bar scene for a good 5 minutes. The women behind me whispered “Gus is gay” during this.

Said the first time he met David Cross the man turned up to his home holding a basketball (at around 27 years old) asking if Bob wanted to play. He replied that he’d just made a sandwich.

He’s a huge Monty Python nerd and kept speaking about it at lengths during random intervals. Someone in the audience shouted that he was saying “Python” wrong (because he’s, ya know, American and says it with an American accent) and he attempted to say it “properly”. He could say Python, he could not say Monty. He thought Python was spelt Pythun, though.

He then did the same when David said Ree-ah instead of Ray for Rhea’s name lmao

He said “I might be slow but I’m not stupid” and briefly chanted “slow is not stupid!”

Apparently hates parody comedy (doesn’t care enough about popular culture. Relatable)

Didn’t expand on it much (because Baddiel hadn’t finished the series before literally interviewing the main actor) but said one of his favourite scenes is the breakup scene, and that he loved when Saul was thrown in the trash, saying “he deserves it”

Told Vince to “beat the shit out of this guy” (JimmySaul) in bcs

Enjoys shooting in difficult locations or circumstances (man likes to suffer for his art ig lmao)

When asked about the piss drinking scene, stated “I refused to drink my own piss, I’m fed up of the taste, so I had the whole crew mix a little of their piss into the bottle so it was a complete mystery” did not explain what was actually in the piss jugs

His wife was just offstage the whole time which was very sweet

Called the Trumps the worst family in America

Didn’t think we have Marmite in the UK. It’s literally British aksjdhekdjf

David Baddiel doesn’t know about Dr Suess. Not relevant to Bob but wth.

Bob said he’s nothing like Saul/Jimmy many times and the central reason he said so is because “Saul needs everybody to like him, Jimmy just wants the respect and admiration of his brother, and I don’t care, I just wanna make myself happy”

His favourite show is BBCs Royle Family

We could submit questions during interval and he answered a couple, one was “do you eat at Cinnabon” to which he replied “no, I had a heart attack” lmao. Baddiel was surprised Cinnabon was a real place.

We all got a free copy of his book (tho apparently he didn’t know?) with our tickets so that’s cool. Will be reading in the next 5-60 months

He got 3 people up on stage to read him questions he’d written and one woman, Claire, was absolutely amazing and actually successfully matched Bob’s stage presence and energy when reading this (hilarious) script he gave her. The others did great too but Claire is the MVP of the evening

Right near the start he said the word cunt. I was thrilled.

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

About the background lore/world building, I cant help but wonder about twisted wonderland's media/pop culture or artistic movements and the like. Like are morally grey characters and antiheroes really a facet of their popular media and if so why doesn't Vil try to lean more towards those roles? If they arent really a part of their media and storytelling then what happened or didnt happen to cause them to be absent?

They have magicam which is pretty much magical Instagram so do they have other sites like tumblr or facebook or ao3? Or even specific nonconsensual parts of pop culture, like is there a twisted wonderland equivalent to the muppets? A magical adjacent Monty Python? Unsolved mysteries with Robert Stack? Or if they had an equivalent to Forensic Files would it focus on the same aspect of our Forensic Files or would it tend to follow the magical sector of their police forces and criminal investigations?

I just think it would be interesting to see how their media develops differently from ours considering various factors, like the proven existence of ghosts and monsters, or the elongated life spans of the fae, not to mention the elephant in the room of the undeniable presence of magic. Like without a doubt they wouldn't have all those true haunting and ghost hunting shows because they would most likely be considered rude and invasive, and there probably isnt going to be any equivalent to the Lord of the Rings, but what would they have, ya know?

cbksdbjebew I’m sorry 😅 I live under a rock like Patrick Star, so I’m not familiar with most of the specific pop culture examples you named 💦 I won’t be speaking on those, since I have little to no context for what they are. But!! I do wonder how Twisted Wonderland’s media and pop culture scene is similar to and/or different from ours!

In the real world, there are definitely instances of people writing a certain genre (for example, Battle Royale), but the genre not really “blowing up” until a popular modern rendition (ie Hunger Games) of it is done, thus thrusting pop culture into an era of oversaturation of that genre (ie more teenage/young adult dystopia novels). It could be that Twisted Wonderland has not yet hit that “popular modern rendition” for morally grey characters/antiheroes yet? A lot of the media and public opinion actually referenced in the main story seems to imply that the current media being offered paints its characters in absolutes (good/evil).

The other possibility is that Vil has too much pride in his profession to take morally grey/antihero roles. He’s been painted as a wicked villain for the entirety of his childhood; it wouldn’t surprise me if his personal ambition, desire to prove his nay-sayers wrong, and rivalry with Neige (the epitome of pure and good) spurred Vil to want to be perceived as the other extreme (the same insane "pure and good” image that Neige has). Vil would want to go “all the way”, not go only “halfway there” or take the role of something far more ambiguous. I would actually argue that Vil only gets around to embracing ambiguous and morally grey roles in episode 6 (whereas he was very black-and-white about it in episode 5). Overblot Idia taunts Vil by calling him a “hero” come to save the day, but Vil rebuts him by saying, “there are no heroes or villains”.

If Twisted Wonderland has Magicam, then I don’t see why they wouldn’t have other social media platforms and sites too! I think in episode 5 Cater shows a video on an unnamed site which required them to watch an ad before they could view the actual video…? So that might be Youtube or another video sharing platform? Azul mentions streaming in episode 6, so there must be some equivalent to a streaming site like Twitch??? There might be other examples that I’m not thinking of off the top of my head.

I think that having magic on set would actually be super useful! For productions like hand-drawn cartoons and films, it could help animators (at least the ones that can use magic) minimize physical strain (since they use their hands so much). For live action productions, magic or potions can be used for special effects instead of like... I don’t know, fog machines, stunt doubles, or whatever else is normally used. I believe this is even mentioned in Vil’s Labwear vignettes 😂 And since different races and species exist (fairies, ghosts, merfolk, beastment, etc), maybe there would be more of a push to educate the public about the different races and species? Like more documentaries and resources so that the general public is more culturally competent!

[spacewizardtrek]

WARNING: This post will ruin you. Like Medusa; look at your peril.

But here is is. It’s the one you’ve all been waiting for.

Kirk bod appreciation #7: The RIDICULOUSLY BEAUTIFUL FACE. A highly technical and academic review.

This is a rather nebulous one. And not, on the face of it (pardon the pun) very philosophical, as it’s essentially about Kirk being stupidly pretty. This post probably will (it will) descend into just screaming and sobbing, but there will be, I promise, *some* meaningful insight into the meaning of ‘beauty’ and textual analysis of its role herein.

Beauty is subjective. But look at him. It’s not just being aesthetic, but it’s the *way* he’s aesthetic. Here I might repeat myself a bit, but stay with me. I may have mentioned before once hearing him described as ‘beautiful in the way women are often described as beautiful’. He is PRETTY. He is indeed often conveyed in the way the women stereotypically (not necessarily rightly) are on screen: perfect, smooth skin; soft, big eyes; luscious lips (his body is sensually curvaceous and furthermore it’s emphasised). He’s not androgynous though. He’s masculine. And yet I still sense what was meant in describing him as ‘beautiful in the way women are often described as beautiful’. He is a rather uncommon form of gender fuckery. He is a form of stereotype-subversion not commonly acknowledged. He seems to be everything at once, ALL THE GENDER; combines whichever traits he desires from those categories, and yet is undeniably a man and masculine whatever the ingredients. HOW IS THIS POSSIBLE, one might wonder. The fact of the matter is, that it IS. And it teaches us something.

The FUCK. nO. You are not allowed to be that pretty, and you are NOT allowed to look at her like that. We’re trying to have a SENSIBLE DISCUSSION here.

Sorry, that was a non-sequitur / nothing to do with what we learn by Kirk’s embodiment; I was just ambushed by my own gif. Only the control of a Vulcan. ONLY that could possibly withstand this onslaught. And even that won’t hold up forever AS WE WELL KNOW

God.

This is going well, as you can tell.

OK. So, it’s claimed he has Eyes and Stupidly Long Weakness-Inducing Eyelashes. You know, from all that fanfic that goes on about ‘big, sparkling eyes’ and him fanning his ‘long, copper eyelashes’. I mean, yeah right, tropey mc tropeface -

IT’S TRUE. HE IS LITERALLY AN ANIME PRINCESS.

There are some moments where he just BLINKS and, how to describe it...how does a BLINK have that effect. It’s NOT ALLOWED.

...I’m sorry. It IS allowed. All of it. I am not shaming you your beauty. Never change, Jim. Never.

OK. I’m ok. 3 pics down, we can get through this -

Oh you are joking. Stop.

I don’t understand how anyone can be so beautiful. Life is a lie. Reality is fake -

- you did NOT just turn your big anime eyes on Spock. You do know this is why he ran away to PURGE ALL HIS EMOTIONS?

And for that matter, you know when Kirk looks his most beautiful? Literally WHEN HE’S LOOKING AT SPOCK. Spock talks some bollocks and Kirk just sparkles like a fucking angel:

Unbelievable. But utterly undeniable.

Sigh. Moving on.

Oh - someone once suggested I talk about The Lips. Lips are so wonderful aren’t they. So many wonderful things they can do.

And Kirk’s. They’re there in every picture: perfect, rosy, soft and madness-inducing. My advice is just...don’t think about them. But since I’ve been asked to draw attention to them, well, you’ve just sealed your fate. Scroll down at your peril.

I WARNED YOU.

I am pulling NO punches.

I’ve seen this great meme going around:

Excuse me though....CUTE?

That’s the understatement of the 23rd century.

Try impossibly beautiful, mind and body: heart of solid gold, soul deep in love with you. Those eyes and all their passion burned into your memories a thousand times over, along with - maybe, suggestibly, idk I’m extrapolating from all the goddamn tension - even the one unforgettable time he laid between lily-white sheets and gave himself to you; every gift of the mind, body and soul - and your ostensibly-forced Vulcan conditioning, that completely ignored how incompatible one part of you was with it, caused so much dissonance that you thought the only possible course of action for you both to survive was to BREAK UP, tear yourself from this beauty and love and sweetness to PURGE ALL EMOTIONS because nothing, nothing equipped you for this; you were set up specifically to fail, and fail hard in the face of transcendental love and beauty by those who rejected such things and didn’t understand you and could never imagine this for you and who instead of helping your beautiful neurodivergent brain flourish taught you to repress and caused you pain and shame and Gol was so hard and Kirk was so sad, so very sad and depressed and hurt and yet he couldn’t stop loving you with a bond so strong he called to you across the stars and Gol was all for naught yet you still didn’t know how to live like this, it was torture, torture until the mind meld with the living machine flashed your BIOS and you knew, love.exe was suddenly running with no errors and he came after you and held you and you held hands and, and -

.

*sobbing*

.

just...give me a moment

.

YOU WONDER WHAT THE SUBTEXT (FRIKKIN’ MAIN TEXT) OF STAR TREK: THE MOTION PICTURE WAS ALL ABOUT???

The pain?? The angst?? The two logical entities seeking contact, love, THIS SIMPLE FEELING? That fucking moment when spock walks on the bridge and the only way he can control himself is to be SUPER Vulcan, while his love gazes at him with those EYES, fucking huge and glittering and hurt and loving?? Is it so much a mystery what memories these two are carrying, what’s behind the searing tension???????

Love him. Love him Spock. Take him in your arms and love him. He’s for you. All for you. Fucking hell guys. The fuck. This movie.

.

ok.

ok I can do this

CAN U NOT

those damn eyes I swear

It’s obviously not all just superficial physical beauty. What IS beauty? Narratively we do sometimes find this ‘prettiness’ enhanced and emphasized like the old vaseline lens to set the tone of a scene (he’s vulnerable and delicate, or someone’s indeed in love with him so we see their ‘lens’ on him); but it is somewhat intangible and nebulous and changeable. I don’t think aesthetic beauty, if one deems it so, on its own, would be enough for the likes of Spock (indeed, no woman could charm him thusly); it's about something deeper. It’s about who he is. Who he is inside: the beautiful AND the imperfect. How his good and bad - how his ‘all’ -  chimes with Spock’s 'all’. The Enemy Within deals with this, and shows how Spock loves all of Kirk, wants him complete, with both his light and shadow. The beauty of all of us is this totality and variance, not one intangible quality.

I’ll bet Spock’s parents knew immediately. Can you imagine Sarek trying to be a total bitch over Kirk, having heard the rumours and just wanting to have one more thing to reject Spock over, immediately projecting onto Kirk as some blow-up pretty-boy and how Incredibly More Disappointing My Son Is for being Obviously In Love With Stupid Illogical Human Doll Face Bubble Butt Bimbo Captain, and Amanda’s like, stfu, let me remind you Kirk is actually a Fucking Amazing Highly Decorated Starship Captain who Saves Your Life and don’t you DARE resent him just because he’s got tits/ass/tum/lips that won’t quit and is obviously the freakin’ sun Spock orbits. Mr ‘I married a human but that was special because it was logical’ or some bullshit. How is Kirk an illogical choice? I mean literally, Spock is a Science Genius™ on the federation’s FLAGSHIP whose well-matched Genius Captain™ understands him, accepts him, brings the best out of him, helps him fulfil his whole potential and is in love with him in the deepest and purest way and will be his bonded soulmate for ALL OF TIME and that fucking sour-faced bih at the start of that ep, ffs.

Of course Amanda stays in touch with Kirk, adores the fuck out of him, sends him old Vulcan lit on t’hy’la bonds (yes sarek, a T’HY’LA bond, so revered freakin’ poets write about it) etc because frankly her son could do FAR FUCKING WORSE.

FAR. FUCKING. WORSE.

Don’t...just don’t slip the bod into the equation, the face is enough for one post. We’re all in therapy for this already, let’s not relapse.

Oh, what’s the use. I’m gonna die. This is it. This is like the Monty Python joke that is so funny it kills you. This man is lethal. I need to stop this thread and purge all my emotions

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

That’s it. I’m dead. You’re dead. We’re all dead.

I hope, however, seeing this post was worth it. See you at Gol everyone.

.

.

The Forbidden Texts, DO NOT READ:

Kirk bod appreciation #6: The Curves. The Front. The...chest. AND THE AMAZING GREEN WRAP

Kirk bod appreciation #5: The Paws

Kirk bod appreciation #4: The Curves. The Back. Poetry in motion.  

Kirk bod appreciation #3: Season 3 (Part 1)

Kirk bod appreciation #2b: The Gluteus Maximus

Kirk bod appreciation #2a: The Gluteus Maximus

Kirk bod appreciation #1: The Tum

[steve0discusses]

Yugioh Ep33 S4 pt 1: Deus Ex US Military

Been a little distracted but was reminded--yo--I gotta finish S4 of Yugioh this year. I think I can do it. There’s like...what...two episodes left? Three? Like I don’t want to tempt 2020, but like...I think I can finish this thing.

That and a bunch of my Photoshop files corrupted, I don’t know why, I’m very scared for my hard drive, and I need to do a big ol defrag and hope that’s enough. Really hoping this is my bad and not my computer’s bad. I’m pretty hard on this computer when I paint digitally.

and I was immediately gifted by the anime gods because yo, it’s my favorite storyboarder! They're back to carry me through my election burn out, every episode they touch has so much style and no matter how freakin weird or confusing the plot is, this storyboarder/animation team doesn’t seem to care. They will this kids show about cards with this attention to detail. They just have a lot of enthusiasm and that’s a thing about anime that I really like to see. No matter how weird it is, you gotta go 150% without any shame. Love it. Love to see em back.

First off, that earthquake from last episode?

Just a little bigger of an earthquake than I originally thought, coincidentally, this is when Roland shows up, only to realize that he’s like...10 minutes to late.

Well, maybe a little longer than 10 minutes when you consider that Mai freakin died and Yugi almost died, and Joey is absolutely dead and being carried across Tristan’s back.

Anyway, Roland just walked into a whole lot and is just trying to process his life. Roland is all of us in October/November of 2020.

If Roland only knew how many times Seto and Mokuba have totally biffed it when he wasn’t looking.

Like for reals...how is Roland still alive? Like...I don’t think the guy has ever died. Not even once. Maybe that’s Roland’s superpower as the secret FourthKaiba, by just being the only one to stay very far away from the constant BS strewn at this family.

Roland is just...too inept to die. He’s always too far away, he comes after the big bad has already murdered a few people, he’s just...too bad at his job to ever be a target. Live long, Roland. The Kaiba who was the smartest of all by actually being the dumbest.

Also, look at him parking far enough away on the actual helicopter landing pad. He is the only ‘Kaiba’ that follows the law. This could also be the other reason for his secret to longevity.

(read more under the cut)

Faced with a stairwell between their freedom and this weird earthquake chasm that just opened on the top story of this building, Yami decides it’s his job to carry...................

...................Raphael.

(Never forget that we know the exactly weight of Yugi Muto.)

And like Yami is weirdly strong because of magic powers but like...maybe Yami should take Joey and then Tristan should pick up Raphael? I’d say Tea could also pick up Raphael, but I feel like she just wouldn’t want to.

TBQH maybe the reason that Yami is carrying Raphael is because literally no one else feels like it? Like no one likes this guy?

Just kinda feels like Yami is holding onto Raphael out of a sunk-cost fallacy. He’s already done so much work to this guy, can’t lose him now. Gotta save Raphael to make up for killing Gurimo, Weevil, and Yugi. Can’t fail a fourth time.

Anyway, you know what else this storyboarder is good at?

How did they even get reference for drawing this? They didn’t, right? They’re just so good at art that they were like “I can draw ANY person in ANY outfit straight up the crotch, I dare you.”

Seto decides to...not help out, much like virtually all of Yami’s other friends, who also just kinda...yelled and cried at this situation instead of...helping.

Which is fine, because the stairwell gave out and then Raphael decided to uhhhh throw this directly at me.

Just one more yeet for the road. Youknow this guy has yeeted the Pharaoh not once but twice in one season, and both times he just chucked him like he was made out of foam core. (Also, please admire the millennium puzzle in this shot going out at like a 90 degree angle. Just...A+, this storyboarder is hilarious)

At first, I really thought Yami was dabbing his way over that ledge.

In a moody shot with his hair and his jacket swaying in the breeze, almost designed for you to lift and stick into your Youtube AMVs, Seto looked onward and seemed...kind of bored because no one’s throwing any cards. And like who can blame him, he has been on the top of so many ledges and so many buildings that he’s seen Yami make this same speech of “DON’T DO THIS DAMN LEDGE THING I SWEAR TO GODS” like...so many times.

He just immediately accepts Yugi died and is like “Well I guess that makes me king of games.”

And Raphael, after like several minutes of begging Yami to just let him die, decides to let go of that ledge on his own, because this is Yugioh, and you gotta fit in that suicide within the first 10 minutes of the episode. Which, PS, is not the weirdest thing that happened this episode.

And because Roland is freakin late to everything, he showed he could have done this the entire time. Honestly I think Roland just didn’t want to deal with Raphael. We can blame this on Roland, right?

PS we never see this building again in this episode.

I don’t know........why they bothered showing this. If anything it makes the next plot twist more weird because it’s like...what was the point of the random ass earthquake and the random ass concept art building if we, in fact, aren’t coming back here???

I mean I guess it’s a nice shot for your Artstation portfolio, good on you, Yugioh background artist.

Unfortunately this chip contains Seto Kaiba’s greatest weakness. (SanDisk card? Jump drive? Which PS--if they had jump drives this whole time, why was Seto using floppies earlier in the season? Like what happened there?)

And then, with the hatch of their helicopter just wide open, no one in a seat belt, and walking away from the destruction of one of the largest buildings in San Fransisco, finally the cops showed up. Real cops this time, not possessed cops. Also, it’s the Marines.

Am I going to get my Monty Python ending? I mean...if cops can recognize these kids in this universe...I might get my Monty Python ending. :) :) :)

For some reason, back on the mean streets of San Fransisco with no people left alive in it, Rebecca just kinda started losing her mind. Maybe this was to make up for the 2 seasons I had to watch Duke Devlin flirt with a 12 yo? That now we have to suffer Duke saddled with this small crazy person?

This small crazy person who is painted as this intolerable person next to Duke Devlin, but is also a love interest for the main character? Like Yugi’s into some weird ass angry girls.

PS the orcs were no longer needed for the plot so they have turned into streams of light in order to join with the Leviathan mass. So now Rebecca and Duke Devlin will just have literally nothing to do for the rest of the season. I guess they can go to Ghiradelli square...someone’s gotta eat that ice cream before it melts.

Also this happened.

In case you were like “Wow Rach, you didn’t update the Death Count, how dare you”--it’s because I uh...completely forgot that the Oricalchos crew is immune to fall damage. Raphael’s just fine now. He fell down 50 stories...and then 50 stories fell on him...but don’t think about it.

Meanwhile, on the back of some aircraft carrier, far into international waters, the kids get recruited into the military of a foreign country and it’s just as weird as you think it is.

Hey guys.

So, Bandit Keith was weirdly in Hell this season for no reason, right? What if he died offscreen because, earlier in the season, the US military threw him at Dartz because they couldn’t get a hold of Yugi or Kaiba? What about that headcanon? What if that’s why his angry ghost wanted revenge?

Anyway, they join the ranks of Shadow T. Hedgehog, which makes sense because...these guys look like human OC’s of Shadow the hedgehog already.

Sorry I just had a moment because Shadow uses guns a lot despite not needing them at all so “people won’t get uncomfortable with how powerful he is” while in Yugioh they can’t even...show a gun. That really is...you ever think about how weird that is? That Shadow the Hedgehog, a strange remix of a 90′s sega mascot, has a million giant guns but Kaiba’s actual gun (which, apparently he does have in the Japanese version of this show) got edited out completely?

Sometimes it just dawns on me and I have a moment.

Now the US Military just hand delivering them to Dartz is so wild because their reason for the USA not doing anything on their own with their fleets and fleets of ships is:

Have you MET the US? I live here, and if we were like given the choice to shoot the ocean...or just die...we’d be like “wait...for reals? So no one gets hurt, we just shoot guns at the water? You mean we finally found our true calling? For REALS? I just shoot this water bucket!??? FOR REALS????” and it would become a national holiday. All pop songs would be devoted to it. Our ancestors would make movies about it.

I mean, our dumbass president considered nuking a hurricane in 2019...in case you forgot because damn, it’s been a STUPID 4 YEARS. (And you better have voted already because for reals do not make me go through 4 more years of this. I do not think this blog would survive it...or the hurricanes that will keep getting nuked.)

Also....the show actually threw the word “proof” out there. Seriously show? You OK?

I figured the mind control situation would be a better reason not to arrest Dartz other than “Dartz is just so good at covering up his tracks” when the TRACKS have a broken down Caltrain on one side of them, and the other side of the tracks have the rest of that same Caltrain at the bottom of a river.

Seto is not amused but he never is. He will take this Nobel Peace Prize and step up to the microphone at the UN and be like “I WANTED IT TO BE A CARDS PRIZE.”

PS--we HAVE a map already, right? Raphael died to give us this map--and then didn’t die, but it’s not like anyone else here knows that. So like...why did we need the US Military to show up at all? Why is this scene important? Other than to look cool, I guess? Like...

...why is the US military here we already have a Deus Ex Machina delivered by Raphael? At least that one was deserved--the whole point of that duel was to get this MAP.

A map that we are never going to use.

...There’s a good chance that two writers wrote this episode in two different buildings and just...glued the two halves together. Animation is wild. Weird ‘Cinema sins’ things like this happen...all the time. This one though, this one is kind of funny because it’s a ton of wasted effort on the very best storyboarder.

Anyway I broke this up into two segments because I’m tired, and also, while a lot of people like long posts, the smaller posts are kinda easier to read. More will be upcoming in like...I dunno it really depends on a lot of things right, now, I’ve been having a time, but at least Yugioh is always there to enjoy. Maybe I’ll need so much distraction you’ll get an update tomorrow? Good things can happen, and it’s not like I get to do anything else for Halloween.

Happy Halloween Y’all! Lets make the most of it!

(here’s a link to read these in chrono order)

https://steve0discusses.tumblr.com/tagged/yugioh/chrono

[frostedroyaltea]

a general synopsis of movies i have seen. i recommend these movies. they are good movies.

the 3 amigos: these three actor bros play the western version of the 3 musketeers in this movie series. they go to this one town where people think the movies are real and they are kind of worshipped there. they have to save the town.

little shop of horrors: there's this baby alien plant. it eats people. there is singing.

bill and ted excellent adventure: they time travel so they won't fail their oral history report

bill and ted bogus journey: evil bill and ted robots kill bill and ted. bill and ted meet Death, God, and famous dead people. there are these weird angel creatures who help them kill their evil robot versions.

the lost boys: there are four "teenage" vampires, two amateur vampire hunters, a grandpa who may or may not be a vampire (they never did make the 2nd one) who is dating someone who may be a vampire (again idk for sure). the grandpa is a Professional vampire hunter. there is a mastermind plan to get the boss vampire in with this one lady

monty python holy grail: king arthur's knights have to find the holy grail. they meet a troll. I think the castle flies I don't really remember.

cone heads: I don't even know how to explain this one. they are aliens. their heads are shaped like cones. they try to act like human beings.

the cat from outer space: it's a cat. from outer space. it has a fancy collar.

That Darn Cat!: there's this cat and the fbi use it to track down these people that Rob banks and take the workers hostage

batteries not included: there are these alien ufo robot things that are a family. they move into this apartment complex and the people living there like them so they let them stay

I might add more if I remember them and what they're called.

[fromthewifecage]

Nursing the Kombatants/Kombatants with injuries or illness

Including Erron Black, Johnny Cage (both younger & older), Raiden, Bi-Han, Mileena and Kano.This is written with affection and there is angst amongst the comedy. I’ve put the Kano bit at the bottom so if you don’t like him you can ignore it. Erron Black: You’ve seen Monty Python and the Holy Grail? Erron is worse than the Black Knight. He’s taken you into the jungle near Kotal’s palaces. The lush foliage is full of exotic birds, flowers with delicate and alluring perfume that only stoke your desire to get to know Erron that bit better. It’s also full of terrifying beasts with too many teeth and claws, and whilst Erron manages to take down that… thing…. he doesn't come out unscathed. He’s spilling blood at an alarming rate, and he’s swaying on his feet, but “tis but a scratch” and “I’ve had worse”. You only manage to get him to sit his (magnificent) arse down and to let you tend to his (horrifying) wounds with the threat of taking away his hip flask. Luckily you’d packed your travel medikit and through sitting on his chest to stop him moving and several phials of superglue and all your steristrips, his leg is attached once again. Sort of. He insists on you kissing it better “but it’s your leg not your mouth” and then stupid idiot faints from shock (from the injury, your technique isn't that bad). Luckily Ermac has sensed something is wrong and appears with a small pack of servants and a litter to carry Erron back to the palace. 3 days after Erron has recovered he invites you back into the jungle.                                          More kombatants after the cut!

Johnny Cage: Younger!Johnny is enough to make you (almost) walk out and never come back. The man is a BABY. He’s admittedly a very cute baby when he’s pouting and shiny eyed and holding out his hand to show you the tiny bruise. One day he’ll tell you he behaves like this to try to get some attention from his parents, they’d loved him when he was small, but as he grew older they gave him less and less attention so acting like a younger child was the only way he knew how to get attention and care. He’s taken you picnicking and you’re both rolling down the hill, laughing like hyenas. At the bottom he twists his ankle. It swells up immediately and starts to turn purple. He’s really trying not to cry, and you actually feel sorry for him because a twisted ankle hurts like a bitch. Whilst you go searching for a branch to use as a crutch, he has a little sniffle, and the red eyes are testament to this when you return. But he really does try not to yelp too much and too loudly when you’re slowly walking (hobbling) back to the car. After you’ve got him back to the medi-centre and he’s got the attention of all the staff, you make your way back to your quarters. The next morning you’re awoken by flower deliveries, chocolate deliveries and tweet after tweet devoted to your ‘bravery upon saving him’. Older!Johnny soon stopped with the baby routine when he actually had a baby. Sonya wasn't going to tend to him and Cassie, so he soon bucked up his ideas. He can deal with minor injuries no problem, but if you’re with him he’s still going to pull the pout and “kiss it better” routine. He’s learnt to love his scars (older action stars need a few scars, right?) He’s taken you to an intimate restaurant for dinner, and you’re walking back to the car when a bunch of drunk idiots start yelling that he’s a washed-up fraud. Johnny ignores them, holding your hand a little tighter when he sees you upset and scared. Then the idiots attack him, and he puts them down, hard, but gets caught across the arm with crowbar. He tries laughing through the pain but you know it’s bad when the jokes stop. He lets you cradle him gently whilst you wait for the Police and Ambulance, and once the morphine has kicked in (administered by the star struck paramedic), he admits you’re his beautiful bunny and he loves you. Raiden: Pain and injury are nothing when the fate of the realms it at stake! Or so Raiden claimed. The man is SUCH a baby. Gods get colds too (when they’re run down after severe exertion such as fighting Shinnok). He makes SO much fuss you’d think it was the end of times. He must have tea and he must have it now. He must have softer tissues, and he must have them now. You’ve run out of lemons and there is no more ginger tea left, and Sainsbury’s can’t deliver until tomorrow. You are so fucked. Fujin has disappeared because he KNOWS how Raiden gets when he’s sick and he’s not going through that again. Raiden is in bed for 5 days. 5 LONG days. The floor of his bedroom is covered in more tissues than a 14 year old boy’s. It’s only when you pointedly mutter loud enough for Raiden to hear that “Shinnok would be a better patient than you” that Raiden bucks his ideas up and stops whinging quite so much. He apologises for being such a bad patient, and his puppy-dog eyes (who taught him that? That’s not fair!) are impressively moving enough that you sigh and let him hug you tightly. You also make sure to keep a secret supply of tea and tissues just in case you have to go through that again. Mileena: Being cared for is an alien concept to Mileena. If she injured herself, Shang Tsung would punish her with a cruel spell and his sharp tongue, and she’d be left to treat her wounds by herself. After she left his ‘care’, Mileena didn’t expect to find someone to treat her with kindness, to be tender and hold her hand when it all got too much. Yet again, Kotal tries to strike at Mileena. She strikes down his forces with blinding ferocity but pays little heed to her own safety, so when she returns to you, battered, bruised and bloody, she’s puzzled at your concern. At first she tries to brush you aside, but you won’t take no for an answer. You take your time to clean and bind her wounds, kissing the bandage gently each time, your touch as gentle as you can be. When you bind her final wound, she looks at you with tears in her eyes. All of a sudden she knows what she’s missed, and she files away the anger the flares at Shang Tsung and Shao Kahn, she will use that against them when the time comes. For now, she’s going to demand more sweet words and gentle kisses from you. Bi-Han: Growing up in the Lin-Kuei is hard. There are no comforting hugs or someone to “kiss it better”, no-one to wipe away those tears and tell you how brave you are. Unless you’re dying, you can deal with it yourself and you’d better be quiet about it. Bi-Han learnt to be quiet after he was punished for crying when he broke his wrist. Kuai watching open-mouthed as Bi-Han got higher and higher up the snow covered tree until he missed his footing and fell, landing with a scream. Grandmaster told Bi-Han that the break was punishment for disobeying the rules. Bi-Han staggers home 2 days late and you’ve been so worried about him. His skin is white as chalk and clammy to the touch. He’s burning up, but shrugs away your concerns. He slumps against the bathroom wall during the shower he insisted he needed, and thank the Gods you hear the sound of the curtain rail breaking. You stroke his head whilst you wait for the ambulance, talking all the time to reassure him you’re there, and he’ll be ok. He doesn’t want you visiting him in the hospital, but you ignore him and stay every day well beyond official visiting hours. He’s been home 3 days when he takes your hand and presses a kiss to your forehead, whispering his love to you. No-one ever stayed with him or cared for him like you. He really does love you. Kano: He’s been a bad boy for a long time, so he’s had more than his fair share of injuries. He’s got a very high pain threshold, and he uses it to his advantage in a fight. When his opponent sees Kano shrug off injuries only to roar and jump back into the fray, they literally shit themselves. You’re partying in the Fight Club when SF burst through the front doors. Most of the patrons scream and run blindly through smoke bombs thrown to try to disguise that SF have likely too few bodies to take Kano down. Kano smiles and carries on downing his pint.

He takes down soldiers with knives, fists and feet, but gets caught by a baton to the side of his head. Luckily his cybernetic eye takes much of the blow, but his vision goes strange and his head is ringing. It’s him versus the last soldier. Kano staggers to his feet whilst you hide under the table, and with every thud of fist against flesh you jump, preying it’s not Kano. The soldier falls and Kano calls to you, staggering back onto his seat, grabbing a beer on the way. He hands you his phone and asks you to call his ‘doctor’, pauses long enough to kiss you, down the beer, then passes out on your shoulder. The doctor patches him up, no long-term harm done. And whilst still in the hospital bed, Kano has you steal a white coat and perform several medicals on him. After all, it wasn’t his dick that got hurt, was it?

[noforkingclue]

hello!! I hope your doing well, your fics are amazing and the only thing keeping me from boredom and insanity :) i was hoping to request a tenth doctor x reader where they are running from some aliens that want to kill them or something similar to that. Can you use the prompts "its a hobby of mine to prove you wrong" and "because i love you, you asshole!" and make it angsty but have a fluffy ending?? you can do whatever you like with the rest of it. Thank you!! 😁😁

Hi anon! Yeah I well thank you. I’m glad that you are enjoying these fics and that they are keeping you from boredom and insanity. Writing these are the only thing that’s keeping me from falling into that state!

Thank you for sending in the prompts and if anyone else wants to send prompts in please feel free to! :)

Title: Bullet

“We’re going to die aren’t we?”

“No we’re not. Have we ever died before?”

“There’s a first time for everything.”

“You see, that’s the one thing I like about you y/n- you always look on the bright side of life.”

You looked at the Doctor in disbelief while he grinned at you.

“I really don’t think that now if the time to quote Monty Python films.”

“If not while running away from Daleks than when y/n? Tell me that.”

You rolled your eyes at the timelord as the two of you sprinted along the winding corridors.

“Aha!” cried the Doctor when the familiar blue shape of the TARDIS appeared before you. “See I told you we weren’t going to die.”

“You never get tired of being right do you?”

“Nope because it’s a hobby of mine to prove you wrong.”

The Doctor opened the door and dramatically bowed, allowing you to enter the TARDIS first.

“Stop right there.”

The Two of you turned around. It was the human was had released the Daleks. They were pointing a gun at you and the Doctor.

“They won’t save you.” Said the Doctor

“Shut up!”

“You’re human, not a Dalek. Once you’ve stopped being useful they’ll kill you. Come with us, we can save you.”

“No! No, once I’ve handed you to them they’ll see how useful I am.”

“That won’t-“

“I said shut up!”

“And I-“

The Doctor was cut off by a bang and a cry of pain. The Doctor collapsed into the TARDIS, grasping his shoulder. Blood leaked out from between his fingers.

“Doctor!” you cried

You looked down at the Doctor and then back out the TARDIS door. The Dalek which had been chasing you appeared round the corner. You made a decision and hoped that the Doctor wouldn’t yell at you too much for taking it. You grabbed the Doctor’s shoulders and pulled him into the TARDIS, ignoring his grunts of pain. You then slammed the doors shut just in time to hear the Daleks shooting at the other human and their screams of pain.

The Doctor had managed to stand and get to the TARDIS console. You ran to his side and helped him fly the TARDIS to safety. When the two of you were away and Doctor sighed and practically collapsed onto you.

“We need to get the bullet out.” You said, leading him towards the med bay.

“I can do it myself.”

“No you can’t. You need my help.”

The Doctor didn’t say anything for the rest of the walk. When you got to the med bay you gently laid him on a bad and went to get some antiseptic.

“I can heal myself.” Called the Doctor

“I know.”

“Then why are you helping me? I can get rid of the bullet myself, I’ve done it before. The bullet hole will heal and then-“

“You want to know why I’m helping you?” you snapped spinning around to face the Doctor.

The Doctor blinked at you in shock.

“Well, yes.”

“Because I love you, you asshole!”

Neither of you spoke. You let out a bitter laugh and wiped the tears from your eyes. Of course you knew that the Doctor wouldn’t love you. He still loved Rose. You made to move away but the Doctor’s hand shot out a grabbed yours. You looked down in shock but the Doctor pulled you towards him. You yelped as you landed in his lap. You barely had time to think before the Doctor tilted your head back and claimed your lips. When he pulled away you were gazing up at him, wide eyed.

“I love you too,” the Doctor said quietly, “I want you to stay. I want you.”

You relaxed into the Doctor’s arms.

“I’ll stay,” you said, “But I’m still going to get that bullet out.”

The Doctor pressed a kiss on top of your head.

“If you say so,” he said smiling, “I’m positive that I’d had healed by then.”

“Are you sure?”

“Positive, I wouldn’t have said so otherwise. I do love proving you wrong don’t I?”

[reachexceedinggrasp]

Fated to Love You here reaffirming my long held conviction that no pure romance drama should be 20+ episodes.

This show is... really something. It is, in the fullest possible sense, A Lot. It starts out as an all-out screwball comedy wrapped around a troperiffic romance fluff plot. Wall to wall clichés, but not in a bad way; in a meta, self-aware, peak performance, finest Velveeta way. And if you’re not familiar with screwball comedy, think ‘light-hearted crack fic with slapstick and farce’. There is nothing believable or grounded about any aspect of it, it starts at Bonkers Level: Platinum and it only climbs higher as it goes on.

(On a side note, this results in the leading man being possibly the most memorable love interest in romcom history. His introduction scene is nothing short of batshit insane and you can't reliably predict how he will respond to anything. I have never seen a main character like this, he is all over the shop and utterly singular. Your first reaction to him is ‘wtf?’, your second and third reactions are ‘really?! this guy??’, your fourth reaction is ‘okay he do be mad hot tho’, your fifth and final reaction is ‘I cannot believe this performance exists, I have no idea what he is doing, but it is amazing.’

Appropriately(?) the actor who plays him is an uncanny Korean doppelgänger of Johnny Depp and- between the resemblance, the mannerisms, and the fearless total commitment to a bold as fuck acting choice with the very serious chops to back it up- I’m not convinced they aren’t half brothers separated at birth.

They do sabotage my happiness several times by starting to randomly style his (long, beautiful) hair very weird, fixing it right when the plot is rapidly circling the drain so he looks his hottest just as the show becomes briefly unwatchable, and then ruining him for the entire second half of the series by shearing it all off. WHY, my anguished cry goes up. Why do you do this?! Why does he have like seven hairstyles over the course of the show? Much later they even briefly give him that ubiquitous Kdrama Second Lead haircut with weirdly forward combed fringe in a solid straight line across the brow all the way back from the crown. It looks terrible on everyone and I hate it so much. This version was less bad than most but it is still bad. Anyway.)

So it’s an incredibly fun time to start but there are some problems with the tone and plot even in the first 9 episodes, including when the lovers start getting along really well right away and they’re both thoroughly decent people so there’s nothing keeping them from having a lovely time together making the best of the circumstances (forced/fake marriage). And, instead of introducing new conflict or advancing one of the dozen conflicts previously established and actually moving forward, there is a painfully contrived rehash of something they already dealt with which is then just never resolved. They make the hero leap to a conclusion his wife is nefarious after he’d already decided once that she isn’t (though it was completely reasonable for him to think she was- the fact that he decided to trust her so quickly just speaks to what kind of person he is), never try to find out more or talk to anyone about it, start pushing her away because of it, and have all this come to absolutely nothing. It only exists so he’ll stop being so incredibly nice to her and they won’t fall in love too fast.

You’d think they would have to eventually clear the air before the romance advances right? No. It wasn’t a real plot point, it was just a reset button to get them estranged and hostile again after they connect over their kindred spirits and we’ve spent a bunch of time showing how profoundly supportive and honourable our hero is. He’s being beautifully mature and selfless because he’s a really good dude (unusual for a romcom drama, right? for the main guy to be nice and considerate? to accept responsibility even if he doesn’t have to? Gun’s weird but he’s wonderful), but the writers need him to be cold and standoffish, so they just make him act like an unreasonable idiot for a while. He’s been thus far hugely proactive and direct and honest about everything, it’s one of his most prominent character traits, but suddenly he’s going to avoid confrontation in favour of being super passive aggressive?? Then the writers never solve it. Never! It just goes away. He got over it, I guess? He decided he doesn’t care if she’s a gold digger who deliberately trapped him? God forbid we have motivations that make sense and organic character drama, right? It's not like he didn't have totally valid reasons to be suspicious that could have led to legitimate conflict our heroine would struggle to vindicate herself from.

But anyway, apart from that kind of lazy bullshit, it’s a fine romance plot with extremely endearing characters who have great chemistry. They are fun and well-rounded and incredibly human despite all the silliness and OTT antics. Their relationship is hugely, hugely engaging and the dynamic is perfect, they really complement each other as characters and organically drive each other's arcs. There's the genuine depth and warmth and quiet pathos so often lacking from this kind of show. Things progress at a semi-reasonable pace. They work up to confessing their mutual feelings and get into some cute shenanigans before making out. It happens soon enough that you are not frustrated, but there's still plenty of build-up. Then- uh oh! We’re only 9 eps in and we have another 11 hours to fill with this fluffy plot!

Time for a bunch of absolute fucking nonsense. Time for our show, which has been so goofy and removed from reality it occasionally resembles a Monty Python skit, which has been so light it asks you to ignore the frankly incredibly fucked up implications of its premise for the sake of comedy (they were both drugged and proxy raped resulting in a pregnancy- the FL was a virgin prior to this and Gun had a girlfriend he wanted to propose to- and it was the FL’s family who did this to them: SUPER FUCKED UP), so farcical that it makes Some Like it Hot look like a gritty crime drama, that show to cover a bunch of serious heavy shit.

First, the rankest of melodrama. The families and the world all turn on our couple, but their love is true and will conquer all- UNTIL, he randomly collapses and gets convenient Soap Opera Amnesia. He’s forgotten their entire relationship and a series of coincidental pieces of misconstrued evidence, the machinations of his scheming ex girlfriend, the Soap Opera Doctor’s advice, and his closest confidants all going along with this conspire to make him believe (AGAIN) that his wife just wants his money.

This whole terrible episode is mercifully brief, but it just gets worse after his memory returns. This is where we get into the Noble Idiocy. The ‘pretend you don’t love them to “save them” from getting hurt by hurting them and making their important life decisions for them as if they don’t have a basic fucking right to decide that themselves’ kind. Which goes on for three FUCK years in the show. He wastes three years of their lives they could have spent together because he’s worried he might die young (in a terrible way) and doesn’t want to put her through that. And, of course, they inevitably get together later, so all he did was make it infinitely worse for her either way. To say nothing of how he thus couldn’t be there for her through the loss of their child. Possibly my most hated fucking trope of all time when done this way.

And, yep, you read that right. This show that has the single most batshit bonkers over the top slapstick I have ever seen in a kdrama, this show has a storyline where the fluffy romcom trope accidental pregnancy ends in massive trauma. Because she was standing around in the street after realising he does remember her (he continued to pretend he had amnesia after his memories came back, it’s all part of the stupid noble idiocy so I glossed over it) and gets hit by a car in the middle of their angst staring.

It is nearly Meet Joe Black levels of hilariously abrupt and incongruous.

so, blah blah, they lose their baby (there’s a very stupid whole thing about her telling everyone to save the baby instead of her- the baby is not far enough along for this to have been remotely viable. She is like 3 months pregnant. They all act like there’s a choice to be made between them and she’s mad at her husband for choosing to save her, but there was NO CHOICE. Either she lives or they both die! ffs I’m so irritated about this) and then he dumps her ~for her own good~~ because he loves her too much to make her go through losing him? So she loses him sooner?? right after their baby died???

Why do people in these stories always think being betrayed and abandoned for no reason and being incredibly angry at someone you love while also not getting to be with them is somehow less painful than making the best of your life together and then losing them against their will? ‘I will make her hate me and then she won’t be sad we broke up/I died!!!!’ is such a fucking galaxy brain take and I despise it with the heat of ten thousand suns. Fuck you, Spider-Man. You aren’t protecting anyone, the villains still know you love MJ and will still use her against you, you clod. Emotionally torturing the person you love is not going to make them not a target because the villains are not as fucking stupid as you two. Anyway.

Amnesia was right where I started fast-forwarding and skipping around (because I couldn’t bear it), but it only goes downhill from there. Maybe I would have toughed out more of the wretched middle part plot twist if they hadn’t cut all the hot guy’s hair off. If I’m going to watch total nonsense tedious melodrama, I need it to at least be pretty. I understand it was a Symbolic Haircut but damnit! Let me have this!

And it ultimately does the thing that kdramas seem obsessed with and which makes me want to claw out my own eyeballs with frustration. There’s a giant time skip, the female lead gets a personality transplant, all narrative momentum is lost, and the characters who eventually (at ENORMOUS length) get together permanently are essentially completely different characters with a completely different dynamic than the couple you were shipping for 90% of the story. It is so FUCKING unsatisfying and it is EVERYWHERE.

Not so much with this one because this one still had a lot of very romantic scenes late in the game, but most that do this, it’s also like all the romance is sucked out of the post-time skip episodes and the ending is a consolation prize instead of a triumphant culmination. Inevitably, the heroine abruptly cools off and is suddenly wary of the hero and wants this Important New Career she never mentioned until the penultimate episode but is now her one true life’s dream. What the apparently irresistible appeal is of these contrived separations and demure conclusions is I CANNOT FATHOM. I’m here for the fucking romance guys, you have not made Citizen Kane, please just indulge me with a big schmoopy finale.

And if not that, it’s frequently that there’s been so many random mood swings and so much shitty behaviour by the end that the relationship doesn’t make sense and you don’t know why they even bother to get back together.

I’m not inherently against all misunderstandings (they are the bread and butter of low stakes romance let’s be real) or attempts at noble idiocy from misguided characters, but the duration and seriousness of the drama these generate needs to be in proportion to how ridiculous they are. If your entire plot can be solved by a thirty second conversation there is NO REASON not to have and the continuation of the misunderstanding is a result of someone just NOT SPEAKING UP when any functional human being would have spoken up seven times by now IT’S BAD.

Do little cliff-hangers, whatever, but don’t draaaaagg out silly misconceptions into Shakespearean tragedy, it’s just wearying. It makes me hate the characters for acting like emotionally constipated toddlers with terminal stupidity. If there is so little trust, so little understanding, and so little basic patience between these people, they probably shouldn’t be dating, so try fucking harder, writers. And noble idiocy that is more than an impulse they fairly quickly see the error of is just insulting. You are not helping the other person, you are being domineering and selfish. I have a whole complex about wasting time and seeing endless parades of characters flushing years down the toilet for literally no reason gives me hives. Especially when the whole issue is about time!

(And, btw, so much of the plot is about how desperately the family needs an heir and everyone still wanting them to have kids the second time they get together- while the ~dilemma used to keep them apart is a GENETIC DISEASE which could STRIKE AT ANY TIME. Do you SEE THE PROBLEM WITH THIS WRITERS????? NO, I KNOW YOU DON’T. ommmmmmmmggggg that’s awful! So they’re just dooming more kids to Soap Opera Brain Disease? And maybe growing up without a father just as Gun did? And no one even considers suggesting adoption??? He never considers that he shouldn’t have biological children despite thinking he shouldn’t have a wife?)

ANYWAY. Please do watch the first nine episodes and the last three, it’s bananas. They are cute as fuck, Gun is The Best, and the tropey romance scenes are top quality. You don't get those things executed so well, it doesn't happen, so you need this in your life. The acting is of a calibre you never usually see in modern romcoms; these are people at the top of their game committing utterly and taking these characters completely seriously. In that way it is pure wish fulfilment for me as someone who loves romance and is almost always disappointed by popular romance media, and thus the show is incalculably special. But skip the middle. Just skip it. It's not worth the suffering. I find the tone whiplash honestly just this side of crass.

I’ve been thinking about it for over a week and I truly love the main characters so it did plenty right, but I just cannot with wedding the two things this show is trying to be together, especially when it goes so hard in two mutually exclusive directions. but also the Meet Joe Black sudden car accident device is not redeemable under any circumstances. Can we never do that again, please.

[titusmoody]

It’s the end of the first quarter of 2021. Here’s a brief review of the things I watched/played/read.

Games

Donut County- pretty charming, very easy, fairly satisfying to play. I’d recommend Untitled Goose Game over this, though.

Heaven’s Vault- If you only have room in your life for one space archaeology game, play Outer Wilds instead. However, you get to translate alien writings yourself (in a simplified game way) in this one, so I’d recommend both. 

Donkey Kong Country 3 103%- so many fun level mechanics in this one. The difficulty of finding and completing everything in the game was spot-on for me.

Donkey Kong Country 2 102%- Each level mechanic in this one is explored and used in far more interesting ways than DKC3, though I honestly had more fun with 3 this time around. This one is the “dark, edgy” one aesthetically which is extremely dumb. Also, there was a lot of guesswork involved in finding some of the hidden stuff, which I didn’t enjoy.

The Room 4- I like escape room games. This one was good. It continued 3′s trend of trying to shake up the format a little, which is fine (better here than in 3, I think) but I wouldn’t have minded if all 4 stayed exactly the same, just with new puzzles.

Spider-Man: Miles Morales- Everything about it was competent. Not only was each gameplay activity fine-tuned to feel good, but the structure of the game also kept kept you experiencing a good variety of each activity. PS5 graphics are good, too. Nothing about it really got me excited to play it, it was just a good after work unwinding thing.

Cyberpunk 2077- Exactly the opposite of Spider-Man in terms of quality consistency. There are aspects of this game that are amazing, horrible, and every step in between. However, I’ve thought about it quite a bit and will probably continue to think about it for both good and bad reasons.

Yooka-Laylee and the Impossible Lair- Donkey Kong Country has better level design and controls. Well, the best levels of this were every bit as good as the best DKC levels, and maybe I’m just so familiar with DKC levels that I zone out a little during the boring bits, but had to pay attention to every moment of this game. Still, I didn’t have as much of an overall good time as the DKC games I played earlier.

Hue- Good 2D puzzle-platformer. I’m no longer surprised by these, but I still appreciate them, much in the same way as I like playing escape room games. I was under the impression for a few years that because I understood the potential of puzzle platformers, it meant I wouldn’t want to play any more of them, but that’s simply not true. I had a good time with Hue.

Shows

Gravity Falls- It’s fine. Pretty entertaining. I wish there were more low-stakes kinds of episodes, just to get more familiar with different sides of the characters. It would have made the characters and setting feel more rounded.

Cowboy Bepop- I didn’t get the hype for this show when I first watched it at 21, and now I can say that it’s simply not my kind of show. I have much more appreciation for it now than I did the first time, but it doesn’t hit me emotionally the same way that it seems to hit so many people. 

Seinfeld- It’s Seinfeld. There was precisely one episode that I had never seen before, plus confirmation that I didn’t dream the episode that’s told in backwards chunks like Memento and is set in India.

Paranoia Agent- While it was disappointing that this ended up being a more simple morality tale than every Satoshi Kon movie I’ve seen, I still enjoyed watching this a lot.

Aggretsuko- I liked the mundane, every-day storylines like a modern, more empathetic Seinfeld. Unfortunately as the show went on, there were more and more wacky situations that no one actually gets into. I might watch the upcoming season if I hear that it’s less ridiculous.

Over the Garden Wall- This was really cool and I’m glad it exists. It’s ten episodes long, which is perfect for it. I thought it was at its weakest during the more lighthearted or humorous moments--precisely the opposite of Gravity Falls. The word “classy” comes to mind to describe this show. 

Beastars- Really good when it isn’t falling into anime plot and dialog cliches. A lot of this first season is dedicated to introducing characters and the setting, which I thought was very well done. I’m curious to see what Season 2 is like.

Movies

Scott Pilgrim vs the World- It’s a fun movie to watch. It definitely makes many of the characters’ flaws seem like more fun than it probably should, but I’m more bothered by the criticism I hear that boils down to “it’s a bad movie because the characters are bad people” which I suspect is an impression you only get if you lack both empathy and media comprehension.

Big- Kinda bad. It has iconic moments that are only possible with its weird premise, but it’s just not a premise that supports an entire good movie. 

Phantom of the Opera- Way better and way worse than I remember. Has the precise right amount of horses.

Knives Out- Not really a movie I needed to watch a second time, but it sure is good.

District 9- I didn’t remember most of this movie and unfortunately I zoned out for most of this rewatch, so I still feel like I don’t know what it’s about.

From up on Poppy Hill- Not one of the top tier Ghibli movies, but still really good in a down-to-earth way that I like from Ghibli. 

Enter the Dragon- I knew to expect everything to be turned up to 11, which is good because it really is a lot. I liked it, though.

Shutter Island- I have never actually liked this kind of twist-reliant movie. I thought I would for many years, but I was always disappointed. At least now I am aware that it’s not what I’m into.

Soul- The premise is much too convoluted, but it does have an excellent moment near the end.

Onward- I liked this one a lot. Why don’t more people talk about this one? It’s definitely better than Coco, which itself was really good.

A Silent Voice- The kind of movie that reminds me that sometimes Japanese storytelling is more to my taste than Hollywood style, in that scenes can be more emotionally ambiguous. 

Tangled- Good in exactly the same way as Frozen and Moana. I can’t really complain, but this isn’t the same situation as puzzle platformers or escape rooms. In this case, I do get a little sick of being completely unsurprised. This movie was made first, so it’s only by chance that this is the one that I saw last.

Monsters University- A good movie, but it really doesn’t have to be about the same characters as Monsters Inc. 

Monty Python and the Holy Grail- Still funny

The Departed- Good if you want an enjoyable crime thriller to watch, bad if you want a Scorcese movie.

Titanic- Getting very drunk and watching this with Brittany might be the best time I had in the past three months. Maybe I won’t think too hard about why a movie about the overdue, violent death of a social order resonates with me right now.

Prince of Egypt- Impressive and grand, but I didn’t really care about the characters or story.

Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan- A good but not great (by TNG standards) concept for an episode that was made extremely enjoyable by the added budget and longer runtime of a movie.

Star Trek III: The Search for Spock- Not as good, but still watchable.

Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home- The kind of ridiculous concept you’d only make when you’ve already had three successful movies and are confident that you’ll be able to make at least another couple. The gang go back to the 1980s (present day to the original audience) and save the whales. It’s apparently exactly the right movie to watch if this is the third consecutive Star Trek movie you’re watching.

Mamma Mia- A lot of fun, but has weird problems that seem like they would’ve been easy to solve at the script level. Maybe if the conflicts had been introduced early on instead of dragging the whole pace of the movie down for much of the last 20 minutes, I would’ve enjoyed the whole thing.

Books

The Well of Ascension- The second book of a trilogy. Very competent. Introduces a whole lot of minor conflicts that really keep the momentum going and give the characters short-term goals that contribute to the overall plot and their arcs. 

The Hero of Ages- The final book in the same trilogy. Equally competent. I wish there had been more long-term payoffs, which is the trade-off you make by stuffing the books full of those short-term conflicts. Spoilers ahead, but not ones that I think ruin the experience of reading. It’s very odd that of three of the central characters, one dies, one becomes a god and then dies, and one becomes God. 

Check Please- About as pleasant as it gets. Full of the type of minor character that sitcoms end up running into the ground because they’re too one-note (Creed from The Office, for instance) but in a series with a pre-planned length, there’s no chance for it to get stale. Plus, I really liked both of the lead characters.

Milkman- Good book about “The Troubles” in Ireland. Very odd collection of characters, but the narrator had an extremely enjoyable voice to read. 

And Then There Were None- Classic mystery story for a reason. Feels more like a Hitchcock movie than Sherlock Holmes. I read it in one day both because the prose was easy and I wanted to know what happened next. Not much substance to it, unfortunately.

Homegoing- Extremely ambitous book where each chapter is narrated by the descendant of a previous chapter, alternating between two branches of the same family. I liked it quite a bit, though because I only finished it yesterday I don’t have much reflection done yet so my opinion has yet to solidify.

[fruitbur]

(bursts into inbox) thAT ASK MEME WITH ALL THE OCS U TAGGED (or just pick and choose but i genuinely would love to know all of them if u want afhdsgjsdhdjd) - darkwarfy

i'm going to start with the easy ones and end with the ones i haven't even talked about to you.

Red-

Full Name: Aaron Cupid Williams

Gender and Sexauilty: Male (trans) and Demisexual

Pronouns: He/Him

Ethnicity/Species: Tribrid of Fae, WARLOCK, and Demon.

Birthplace and Birthdate: His birthplace is unknown to HIM so therefore it won't be stated. he was born on Halloween but the year is also unknown.

Guilty Pleasures: Dancing and Singing. his mother never allowed him to do anything fun when he lived with her (besides reading) so he hides that side of him.

Phobias: Spiders, water, and the dark.

What They Would Be Famous For: besides being the only one of his kind? his singing, there is just something about it.. i wonder what?

What They Would They Be Arrested For: destroying prisons and freeing wrongly captured supernaturals.

OC You Ship Them With: No one, Red is too young to date throughout most of the stories he is in.

OC Most Likely To Murder Them: Iris (his mom) or Icarus

Favorite Movie/Book Genre: Favorite movie would be Shark Boy and Lava Girl, he loves kids movies. Book genre is sci-fi or adventure stories.

Least Favorite Movie/Book Cliche: For movies it has to Coraline and book cliche is the hero or hero's lover/bestfriend dying for the greater good.

Talents and/or Powers: Talents would be as i said before his dancing and singing. his powers? jesus Red has a LOT. He can do basic magic, he can light himself on fire in a blue magic flame before it spreads around himself. telepathy, teleportation, and "invisibility" (that's more lore stuff) not really a power but he can control his appearance (his was born with baby blue skin and light purple hair but his mother taught him to hide that side to blend in with humans) he has a ribbon spell that he can call them to wrap his wrists and his controls them (i.e pulling and wrapping up his targets) he has another spell that does the same thing called flower power (this with rose vines) that he uses to hurt someone if need be. okay this is getting too long but he has more.

Why Someone Might Love Them: He is such a sweet kid and lights up the rooms he is in. you can't help but love him.

Why Someone Might Hate Them: Red can be a little troublemaker and cause chaos for fun. which gets annoying when shit goes down.

How They Change: Red always thought he was just a weapon, a tool for a war that was never coming. as he grows up and lives on his own with Angel, he changes to be someone full of love for not just others, but himself.

Why You Love Them: Red was my first ever OC. He has been through so much changes and growth and i think i finally love him as he is now.

Angel - (i'm gonna shorten the questions so this doesn't get too long)

Full Name: Nope- that's lore and i wanna tell you that Later.

Gender: Female (Trans), Lesbian.

Pronouns: she/her

Ethnicity/Species: loosely based on the mayans, a necromancer, and a clockwork angel necklace.

Birthplace: Her village in that universe's Tulum. Birthdate... she's existed for over 2000 years, who knows how old she is truly.

Guilty Pleasures: Gardening and painiting.

Phobias: the water. just- the water.

Famous For: bringing the dead back to life with ease.

Arrested For: Killing witches who mess with Red.

OC Shipped: I ship her with Niko, two crazy girls who just want bodies.

OC Murder: Iris again, or Lexi (not doing her, she isn't too important rn)

Favorite Movie/Book Genre: she doesn't watch movies that often because she is ya know.. trapped. but when Red can watch something other than kids movies, Angel finds herself loving romance movies, hasn't picked a favorite yet. Books though? cook books! she enjoys learning about food even though she can't eat.

Least Favorite: Horror, just like Red. or anything with water. nothing against mermaids or wildlife, but she's seen enough of the sea for 10 lifetimes at least. Cliche would be evil necromancers, screw that.

Talents: Her painting are to die for. powers??? now this is going to be fun. Angel can bring back the dead, use her magic to move things and grab people. over the course of her time trapped, she has learned how to possess whomever wears her, which leads to some fun beat downs with both Red and Angel working as a single unit. oh did i mention Angel really loves to mess around with blood magic? she was the only one who was able to master it before the witches attacked.

Love Them: Someone would love her becauss how passionate and nurturing she is. also because she enjoys cracking jokes in the safety of the clockwork during the WORST of times.

Hate Them: the witches hated her for her powers and that she was "sick" in the head for enjoying blood magic.

How They Change: Angel had to learn to live as a soul for so long, slowly forgetting what it means to be a living person, that has to be bad for her mental health.

Love Them 2: Angel has become one of my favorites because of how much i've put thought into who she is.

Niko -

Name: she still hasn't came up with a last name, might just take Angel's :)

Gender and Sexuality: Nonbinary and pansexul

Pronouns: she/her

Ethnicity/Species: Biracial, Japanse and Guyanese, a life sized Drawing Mannequin.

Birthplace: a black market factory that makes life sized objects to be used by witches. Birthdate, before 2016, at least.

Guilty Pleasures: ripping the skin off of witches for shit and giggles. oh and grooming dogs!

Phobias: none, nothing phases her.

Famous for: her spine chilling laugh.

Arrested for: all the murders she's done, that is, if she was ever caught.

OC Shipped: Angel of course.

OC Murder: any and all witches, Lexi, Syd.

Favorite Movie/Book: nope and nope! too busy living in the moment to sit down in one place, besides not have real hands. so the next question is useless.

Talents: is flawlessly ripping skin off of a living person a talent? Niko would say so. besides just living, Niko can change her shape into any type of doll/mannequin drawing or otherwise to hide in stores.

Love Them: she is a funny gal! creepy as shit but loyal once you've gained her trust.

Hate Them: "she. skins. people." -Syd at least 20 times.

How They Change: goes from a manic doll to a somewhat a stable person with the power of lOvE.

Love Them 2: She is perfect for Angel and that's enough for me.

Trinity -

Name: Trinity Wither Lakes

Gender: Female, Bisexual.

Pronouns: she/her.

Eithnicity/Species: Biracial, Polynesian, and African American. Werewolf and Siren.

Birthplace: Kaneohe, Hawaii. 3/17/1999.

Guilty Pleasures: Running in the woods in the middle of the night.

Phobias: being half wolf, she fears anything with silver, oh and blood.

Famous for: her speed.

Arrested for: graffiti and other forms of vandalism.

OC Shipped: Abigail. (not doing her either, sorry!)

OC Murder: Lexi, Raph, her grandparents.

Favorite Movie: Twilight and The Twilight Saga. she loves quoting the movies and books to piss everyone off, making it her favorites. Cliche would enimes to lovers.

Least Favorite: The Princess Bride, she just doesn't Get It. Cliche would be anything with angry werewolves or evil sirens. "we aren't your tropes, humans" -Trinity everytime she reads or watches something with a sexy but evil siren.

Talents: all the perks of being wolf and siren, nothing to add really.

Love Them: she is headstrong and makes for a good leader for a rebellion.

Hate Them: too loud, doesn't back down from a fight. will not shut up if someone is wronging her in public.

Change: she goes from the sheltered girl from her family's home in California to the loud rebel in Texas.

Love Them 2: Trin is like me, i don't know when to quit. if someone wrongs me i will scream it from the roof tops before i let them get away with it.

Syd -

Name: Syd Brimstone Lockwood

Gender: Female, Bisexual.

Pronouns: she/her

Ethnicity/Species: Caucasian, human.

Birthplace: Boston, Massachuestts. 4/20/1999

Guilty Pleasures: shitty reality tv, she lives for the drama. also magic, she has always been skeptical of the existence of magic so she spends much of her time researching and tracking down sightings of magic usage.

Phobias: None that i can think of.

Famous for: her deadpan delivery and humor/her resting bitch face.

Arrested for: stalking "known" supernaturals.

OC Shipped: Ainsel.

OC Murder: anyone who she follows would kill her, mainly Lexi or Raph though.

Favorite Movie: IT (2017) or a Purge movie. favorite cliche would be any boring, human trope. so like a coffee shop au.

Least Favorite: Harry Potter (okay she really enjoys the third one but she'd never admit it), cliche, would be magic. (she doesn't hate it, just that she doesn't believe.)

Talents: breaking and entering. "that's a fucking talent and you know it, Ains! i've never been caught in my life." -Syd. she is human so no powers.

Love Them: over protective of the ones she loves. would fight anyone to save Ainsel and she'd win.

Hate Them: her skepticism makes it hard for her to make friends and tears groups apart.

Change: after she meets a certain someone, she finally lets go of her overbearing skepticism and borderline hatred.

Love Them 2: i just love her character.

Ainsel -

Name: Ainsel Raven James

Gender: Female (Trans), Asexaul.

Pronouns: she/her.

Ethnicity/Species: African American (she has albinism), human.

Birthplace: Middletown, New York. 5/18/2002.

Guilty Pleasures: painting on herself, walking in the rain with no umbrella.

Phobias: fire. "You can't control it Sy-Sy!!! what if you drop that match huh?! we could go up in flames! i don't want to burn away!"

Famous For: her looks, or her happy go lucky nature.

Arrested For: Jay walking to get away from a monster or someone chasing her and Syd.

OC Shipped: Syd.

OC Murder: Lexi or Raph.

Favorite Movie: Tangled. Cliche, a happy ending.

Least Favorite: Monty Python and The Holy Grail. Cliche, a dog dying.

Talents: Her impeccable timing, always seeming to get Syd out of trouble before she is caught. "Nuh uh! none of that miss "breaking and entering!"" -Ainsel. Again a human so no powers.

Love Them: her optimism and acceptance of magic and the supernatural. how she loves everyone so fiercely and stands for what is right.

Hate Them: how happy and full of light she seems to be.

Change: She starts to stick up for herself more and learns how to fight back.

Love Them 2: i love how happy she is, i want to be that comfortable in my own skin like her.

Sebastain -

Name: Sebastain A. Montague

Gender: Male, Aromantic, Asexaul.

Pronouns: he/him.

Ethnicity/Species: Caucasian, Vampire and Sorcerer.

Birthplace: Venice, Italy. 7/25/1462

Guilty Pleasures: Ballroom Dancing. Drinking straight from the pulse.

Phobias: the sun, even if he can walk in the daylight.

Famous For: his charm and "naturally" good looks.

Arrested For: a string of murders in the east coast of the US.

OC shipped: no one, the only thing close to a relationship he has is his friendship with Red long into the future.

OC Murder: Syd tries, but she finds it's hard to kill something already dead.

Favorite Movie: he has lived for so long, he finds his memories are better than what you'll find in those picture shows. he does enjoy reading poems by Edgar Allan Poe or any of Dickinson's works. (skipping the next question)

Talents: Dancing and cooking. Powers, compulsion (vampire mind control), and the basic skillsets a sorcerer has.

Love Them: his charm, though their love is misplaced, is appreciated.

Hate Them: he is a world class bastard who knows how to use his charms to get what he wants, you.

Change: He learns to be nicer to people and not view them as just a food source.

Love Them 2: he is one cocky bastard but i wouldn't trade him for any other bitch out there.

Irri -

Name: Iradeseca the Faithful

Gender: Genderfluid, pansexual. (in a poly relationship).

Pronouns: any, but mainly goes by she/her.

Ethnicity/Species: she's.. she's an alien boss. (oqjsgsyisha) anyways she is from a race called The Marked Ones. i'll tell you all about them soon. Irri is of the Shifter classification, and is the last pure blood shifter left.

Birthplace: their (the girlfriends/partners) home planet, in the palace of the shifters. (no date because lore reasons, this will be the same for her girlfriends.)

Guilty Pleasures: her partners 😏

Phobias (more like fears): explosions, drowning, losing her girlfriends.

Famous For: her shifting ability.

Arrested For: well... L O R E

OC Shipped: Betrix, Calenni, and Desa.

OC Murder: lore

They are aliens, so i'm skipping these questions.

Talents: her speed. she is a shifter, so she can shape shift into her true form (a ice fox) and into her more humanesque form. (having two arms and two legs)

Love Them: her mysterious but gentle presence

Hate Them: her special skill and the fact she is dating Calenni and Desa in particular.

Change: Irri changes from being controlled by an oppressive regime.

Love Them 2: She is my second oldest oc, she will always have a special place in my heart.

Betrix -

Name: The Stoic Betrix

Gender: Genderfluid, pansexaul. (in a poly relationship)

Pronouns: she/her or he/him.

Ethnicity/Species: The Marked Ones, Bender classification.

Birthplace: on their home planet, in a abandoned temple of the benders.

Guilty Pleasures: smiling and being happy.

Phobias: being alone and losing his girlfriends.

Famous For: her calm, unphased demeanor.

Arrested For: same reason as Irri and Desa.

OC Shipped: Irri, Calenni, and Desa.

OC Murder: WOAH WOULD YOU LOOK AT THAT, LORE!!!

Talents: being able to take everything thrown at him without saying a word (punches, kicks, fire, etc etc). bending people in half without moving a muscle. being a bender means she can bend spaces and minds with no difficulty, leading him to control the person's mind.

Love Them: No matter what happens to her, Betrix always gets back up with twice the amount of power and the same amount of complaints, zero. a man of little words unless he is with his partners.

Hate Them: WHY WON'T SHE STAY DOWN? STOP FIGHTING ALREADY!!! dating Calenni and Desa

Change: Betrix learns how to open up more and use her words because she is allowed to speak.

Love Them 2: She is a badass. who needs to speak when you can just knock the asshole over with one push.

Calenni -

Name: Calenni the Creative

Gender: Genderfluid and pansexual. (in a poly relationship)

Pronouns: she/her and sometimes called they/them by Betrix.

Ethnicity/Species: The Marked Ones, Creator classification.

Birthplace: On their home planet, on her family's estate.

Guilty Pleasures: being taken care of, not always the one leading things.

Phobias: bugs, filith, losing her partners.

Famous For: looking like a flower or a tiny pixie creature.

Arrested for: nothing because of lore reeasons

OC Shipped: Irri, Betrix, and Desa.

OC Murder: lore.

Talents: everything she creates is one of a kind and priceless. She is a creator so she is able to make whatever comes to mind with just a tap of her fingers. and is always changing how she appearance due to creating new shapes and forms.

Love Them: she speaks out against what was happening with the creators and risked her lives for her partners, nearly dying for them.

Hate Them: didn't sit back and be the little princess she was supposed to.

Change: learned how to be independent while being able to depend on her loves.

Love Them 2: Calenni said eat the rich even if that means eat me too.

Desa -

Name: Desa the Kind

Gender: Genderfluid and pansexual (in a poly relationship)

Pronouns: any but mainly she/her.

Ethnicity/Species: The Marked Ones, Destroyer classification.

Birthplace: on their home planet, in the woods far away from civilization.

Guilty Pleasures: creating stuff!!! being able to just live and feel love and acceptance.

Phobias: destroying the ones she loves. being alone, losing her partners.

Famous For: being understanding and not judgmental.

Arrested for: lore- but also just for being caught with Calenni.

OC Shipped: Irri, Betrix, Calenni.

OC Murder: lore, but anyone but her partners.

Talents: Her forgiveness. Being able to destroy whole planets by just being on them. Detroyers can eliminate anything in their paths with little to no struggle.

Love Them: ??? what is not to love??? she is such a friggin sweetheart who wants to spend all eternity with her sweethearts.

Hate Them: being born.

Change: girl has it ROUGH let me tell you. but in the end it'll all work out and a much happier, healthier Desa will make it out on the other side.

Love Them 2: "all i want is to love what i can not destroy with a single touch, then and only then, i'll be at peace" -Desa.

BONUS!!!! BONUS ROUND!!!!

Iris -

Name: Iris the Lurer

Gender: Female and Straight (😔)

Pronouns: she/her

Ethnicity/Species: Greater Demon (dark gray/light purple complexion)

Birthplace: in the demon realm, before mankind was created.

Guilty Pleasures: using her kids as weapons to orchestrate a war. oh and 90 Day Fiance on TLC.

Phobias: love and weakness from her children.

Famous For: her natural rainbow hair.

Arrested For: mass genocide.

OC Shipped: Icarus (two slimey bastards)

OC Murder: ANGEL AND RED LIKE THE BAD BITCHES THEY ARE 😤💯

Favorite Movie: The Birdcage. Cliche would be main villainess destroying the land.

Least Favorite: The Hunger Games. "so over rated and boring CGI, why do humans enjoy this?" -Iris

Talents: being the worst mother alive, making your child into a monstrosity to benefit your delusions. her powers are mostly mental manipulation and normal demon theatrics.

Love Them: being confident, commanding, and full of herself.

Hate Them: everything she has ever done after breaking free from the demon realm with Icarus.

Change: maybe if she gets murdered she'll finally change.

Love Them 2: i like working with a villain, morally gray character like her.

THIS TOOK ALL DAY WOANSGEUOWMSB I HAVEN'T LEFT THIS TAB ALL DAY.

[bluesunsdusk]

✏️ Any particular reason for the names you used for your ocs?

✏️ Any particular reason for the names you used for your ocs?

–// I have a lot of ocs, so I will pick some. It’s going to be long either way… ))

Overwatch

Najma (Najma Daher)

When Naj was first made, they had Prima as placeholder name and their kit was based around light, but I struggled to really place them in the universe. They were still based in Oasis, with sumerian aesthetic, and they were an AU for a fandomless oc. I was still trying to pick where the heck they were from. I added Najma as possible name because it means star and is Arabic. As they finally developed to suit the universe more and be an own character, the name stuck, because I like it and they are a warm person and the sun keeps us alive, and Naj was made to help keep someone alive. Dunia, their owner, was named to reflect her meaning in Naj’s life. Dunia was their whole reason for existing, their world, their life. 

Najma coincidentally also works for…other reasons.

Najma’s code name, Nazar, comes from that their abilities are most effective when looking into their lights and optics, which flare up when they use their ult as well. Their optics are also blue.The evil eye, which causes harm upon those who have been struck by it.

I think Daher meant clear. Najma does’t actually have a surname, as they are not a member of the family rather than just property of said family. However, I still wanted the surname to be something with a tiny bit of a fitting meaning. Rather than doing it by naming conventions used with Mamun, I went with them just having just a family name, much in Europe and the US. I also kept it to just two names this time.

Mamun Wasif Said

Mamun had a long list of names on his hero sheet. See, the given name is an aspiratory trait, the second the father’s name, and the third the grandfather’s name or family name. In Mamun’s case, Said is his grandfather’s name. So, that means Mamun’s dad is called Wasif. Gien names he could have been Majdi (commendable, praiseworthy), Marwan, Naseer, etc. His surname could have been Assaf, Kassar, Al-Mansur (the victorious), or Nasrallah (god’s victory). Now, I am not at all close to being an expert on arabic naming conventions, so I was like let’s keep it simple. 

Now, Mamun is supposed to be a tank hero and his character design was made to emphasise that he is a soft and huggable man who deserves the whole world. He needed to look sweet,warm, trustworthy, and dependable. Mamun is a name that feels like it has soft edges. It’s gentle. There’s no hard tones in it. Mamun means dependable, which is something he wants to be and his parents would have wanted him to be as well. A good son, brother, and eventually (if he so wished) husband. 

I forgot what Wasif meant… I think I just liked how it sounded with Mamun compared to the other names listed along with it. I matched several names that were listed on his hero sheet behind Mamun and they didn’t sound nearly as good with it as Wasif did. It means ‘one who praises’.

Said was just a good name to follow Mamun Wasif with. It just wraps it up nicely when I wanted three names in there. It means happy. 

Spigel

Spigel’s name is explained in his bio, I think. The name is given because he’s able to copy the appearance of a person and uses this after eliminating them to blend into a faction he’s trying to infiltrate or wipe out. It takes observation of mannerisms, appearance, speech patterns, etc. to do a convincing guise, and once that is done, it will be like looking into a mirror for the target.

He was always called Spigel because that’s Luxembourgish for mirror. Sure, it’s not smart for the assassin to take a nickname from his own personal origin, but…it’s fine if a guy from Luxembourg gave him that nickname rather than him giving himself said nickname.

Roland Marie Schroeder 

Roland is a pretty common name in Luxembourg, and Marie is a common middle name. I liked Roland as a name, because is seems warm and strong, and Roland is a quiet dude at times, but even though he’s pretty small as well, he can take up a lot of social space just by being a little… dramatic. He would have liked the name because it is, as Monty Python would say, woody. At least, I think it was Monty Python, I’m not sure anymore and can’t find it.

Michael Abatangelo 

Michael was the general of the archangels, and putting Michael together with Abatangelo makes it sound close to Michelangelo. Though, the latter was on accident and I was like yep that’s his name now. I went through several names I don’t really remember. Michael was a strong name that also sounded pleasant.

Fable

Aidan Fawkes

Aidan is an Irish name that means fire. I didn’t know quite what to call him. I didn’t want a name that was just big strong man large energy. It needed to sound not too thick, in a way, maybe a little light to suit his personality. He also had a lot of energy growing up and was a sweet guy. 

His father’s name is actually Mac Lochlainn. That’s a reference and not chosen for the meaning because it’s not used on Aidan. Also, it’s just really nice sounding surname. His grandma on his father’s side’s surname was Kelly. A very common surname where they were from. Anyway, Aidan’s dad didn’t want his kids to have the disadvantage of having a foreign surname. The given names, however, weren’t too odd, and both of his parents did want to give him a link with his father’s heritage in their names. Furthermore, he was born with red hair. 

As such, Aidan was given as his name, and he was bestowed with the surname of his mother, Fawkes. I picked Fawkes because 1) It sounds good with Aidan 2) it means falcon, making his name fire falcon 3) Guy Fawkes. 

Duncan Reynold 

I know the hero in Fable 2 is called Sparrow. However, that is a title/nickname, not a legit name. Surely, his parents, whom Sparrow canonically knew, gave him a real name. I wanted him to have a legit name. I wanted him to be of scottish-type origin. Now, Duncan has tanned skin from being out and stuff and dark hair. He’s also a brawny guy. He would have picked himself a pretty awesome name that feels strong, also… it has can in it, because he can do it. I jest. 

Duncan is a mix of two parts. Together, these parts form a name meaning dark-haired warrior or dark warrior. Of course, he doesn’t know that. He just thinks it’s an awesome name. 

Reynold is a carry over from trying to give king Logan a surname. It’s also a mix or two elements, advice and rule. English meaning is wise/powerful ruler (or something like that. It can also be advice from a ruler or king’s advisor, but let’s ignore that). While Duncan was that, Logan eventually proved not be.

Mass Effect

Medesa Adrestis

It’s actually from Medusa, because she’s a bit of a protector who gets spun into a villain because of the methods she uses to protect herself and others, which is often violent and rather fatal, since slave traders deserve no rights. I think there was something else, but I forgot… Oh, right! Her surname, Adrestis. I saved it in my drafts and idk if it’s still there…

I looked it up to jog my mind!

It’s from Adrestia and Adrasteia, and I didn’t want to name her exactly after that despite Asari names looking painfully ancient Greek inspired and very feminine. 

Adrestia is a figure from Greek mythology, she who cannot be escaped, venerated as a goddess of revolt and just retribution. Adrasteia, “inescapable”, was a nymph charged with taking care of a child Zeus. Medesa was charged with taking care of Toreg. 

Vicarius Hzzek and Lictor Kgrln

So, I won’t explain their names, because I assume Kett names are either just ID codes or can’t be easily changed into a more human tongue. I will go for their titles, though I believe I have explained it in a hc post before. Kett ranks seem based on Roman Empire influences, as is a part of their culture in general. They have Cardinals, Archons, Anointed, Ascendants. These seem religious. A Vicarius is a word that means substitute or deputy. It’s the root of the English word “vicar” as well and is used in things like vice-president. Anyway, Hzzek is a secondary to a Cardinal, making her vice-cardinal of an exaltation facility. 

As for Lictor, this comes from another Latin thing. A Lictor is a type of bodyguard to a magistrate. Kgrln is one of Hzzek’s Destined, who is also assigned with escorting and guarding her. He does this together with other Destined who would also be of the Lictor role/title. 

Dragon Age

Kata

Kata used to be an arvaarad and he considered himself the death of many a saarebas. That, and he is an assassin type, like a katari. He brings death to those who try to oppose him with violence, so basically he’s still death, just to other people now that he’s no longer in the qun. It’s sort of a method of intimidation. If a qunari is told they’re about to meet death, they might reconsider their current course. 

Kost

Kost had another name, aban, which probably means sea, when going by “Meraad astaarit, meraad itwasit, aban aqun.” Which means “The tide rises, the tide falls, the sea is unchanged.” He chose it, because the sea is unchanging and also clam. He was the same after leaving the qun as he was when he left. 

Eventually, however, he changed his name to Kost, after staying with a group of Tal-Vashoth who helped him become less stuck in his qun ways and more able to see himself as a person. He came to be at peace with himself and took on the task of assisting some other new Tal-Vashoth in the process. As such, he took on the name Kost, “peace”, to reflect this. 

[leighlikesthing]

“Boy was Spielberg ever wrong. Close Encounters my ass.”

Farscape is on Amazon Prime.

I repeat:

Farscape

Is on

Amazon Prime.

It’s also 20 years old this year.

If you’re not familiar the Sci-Fi Channel’s first scripted show that aired from 1999-2002, let me introduce you to a floating prison filled with pansexual idiots.

Our premise: John Crichton, American astronaut, takes his tiny little ship out for a spin to test some theories that he and his partner in science and best friend DK have been working on. While doing so, John encounters a wormhole, and gets pulled through to a completely different galaxy, dropped into the middle of a firefight between a living ship full of prisoners, and their captors who are trying to take them down in space fighter jets (like X-Wings but called Prowlers). John winds up on the prison ship and escapes with the now freed prisoners, and four years of wild, sexy, puke-filled shenanigans ensue.

Or, as a friend put it when he caught it on Netflix a few years ago: “Drunk Man Yells at Muppets.”

It is the strangest thing in the best possible way, mostly due to the fact that the show’s hero winds up on the prison ship instead of with the uniformed, bureaucratic Peacekeepers (Think the United Federation of Planets- but with more murder, world-conquering and a “we were just following orders” attitude).

What this means is that there is room to tell more stories. When you’re a fugitive on the run, you can go anywhere. There’s nobody to tell you where to go or what to do. There’s no captain, or hierarchy, or sense of uniformed duty. You’re just a bunch of fuck-wits on the run.

And they were.

Possibly the best thing about Farscape is that it wasn’t ever afraid of anything. Very early on, it played with whatever style of storytelling it felt like. It played with every trope in science fiction it could get its hands on. We had alternate universes, clones, sex pollen, body swapping, galactic wars, flammable bodily fluids, space madness, the whole nine yards. It played with other genres like horror and comedy and romance as well and it used a concoction of CGI and practical effects which was probably expensive, but incredibly effective.

It made no qualms about paying homage to other shows. From lines about Buffy the Vampire Slayer, to Monty Python and Max Headroom being sent up in the same damn episode, Farscape loved to drop all sorts of references. It didn’t shy away from uncomfortable camera tricks and made an entire episode that plays on aggressive lights and sounds to represent different dimensions. It even went animated for an hour!

Farscape is also the first show to ever be saved by an aggressive internet fan campaign. The show ran on Sci-Fi Channel (back when it was still Sci-Fi Channel) for four years before the plug was pulled, and in response, fans paid for an ad in the Hollywood reporter to champion bringing it back.

And it worked. We got a 2 hour mini-series that wrapped things up satisfyingly and sweetly.

If you’ve never watched before, give it a go. Season One can feel slow, but power through those growing pains and you won’t regret it.

[superchartisland]

Discworld (Perfect 10/Psygnosis, PC, 1995)

The worlds of computer games and fantasy/sci-fi books have long been close together. Early British gaming milestone Elite was one of many, many games to have taken some inspiration from Douglas Adams’s sharp and funny science fiction parody The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy. In the other direction, let’s look at Terry Pratchett, Douglas Adams fan and the UK’s best-selling author of the 1990s thanks to his Discworld series roughly doing for fantasy what Hitchhiker’s did for sci-fi, but many times more prolifically. Pratchett drew on his lasting interest in computer games in his writing. Small Gods (1992) is a spin on the central mechanic of Populous that gods get more powers the more believers they have, with the twist of considering what really counts as belief. Racist mis-step Interesting Times (1994) ends with its main character controlling a Terracotta Army stand-in via what is obviously the interface from Lemmings. Outside of his Discworld series, Pratchett wrote a whole book about a computer game, Only You Can Save Mankind (1992) in which the main characters are drawn into a game that’s somewhere between Space Invaders and Elite. He takes the side of the aliens.

Meanwhile, alongside Adams and Pratchett’s witty, knowing parodies of genre fiction, in the world of gaming LucasArts were making a big success of point’n’click graphic adventures which served as witty, knowing parodies of genre fiction. There’s no coincidence there: Douglas Adams worked together with LucasFilm Games (as was) on their first adventure game, Labyrinth, a logical extension to Adams’s own interest in computers and his role writing the text adventure version of Hitchhiker’s. Across the Atlantic from LucasArts, the biggest British success in the world of graphic adventures in the early ’90s was Simon the Sorcerer by AdventureSoft, who had originally wanted to make a Discworld game but couldn’t get the rights. Instead they made something in much the same spirit. Title character Simon is essentially an amalgam of Pratchett’s early Discworld protagonist (and useless wannabe wizard) Rincewind and LucasArts’ Monkey Island protagonist (and useless wannabe pirate) Guybrush Threepwood.

By 1995, a Discworld graphic adventure wasn’t just a good idea, but practically an inevitability. Beyond the intertwined background, the format is perfectly suited. The slow, detail-focused gameplay is a perfect delivery vehicle for comedy. There’s a reason why Rincewind and Guybrush Threepwood, self-aware and sarcastic commentators on the world around them, were so compatible, and indeed you play as Rincewind in the Discworld game. The meta tendencies of the genre line up with one of the key repeated themes of Discworld, the idea defined on occasion as ‘narrativium’: narrative is one of the key building blocks of the world and able to exact a powerful force upon events. Things happen because they are expected to happen, and because they make for the best story. At one point Discworld the game plays on one of Pratchett’s best straightforward manifestations of this — “one-in-a-million chances happen nine times out of ten” — getting the player to work out the exact series of accessories that will add up to the hero’s chances being 1,000,000–1.

Lots of games make you work out what their developers want you do as a solution, but few tie that puzzle-solving as directly in to the narrative as graphic (and text) adventures. The actions in question tend more to the detailed mechanics than the grand sweep, but at best progress is a kind of collaborative narrative process between creator and player, tuned to the same wavelength. You progress the story by working out what the story is going to be. Or what the story should be. The player enacts the force of narrativium.

And so in Discworld the game, Rincewind is not just aware, as in the books, that he is the unwilling hero in a fantasy story, and what the rules of that story are. He is aware that he is the hero of a fantasy point’n’click adventure. His ambulant suitcase companion of infinite and terrifying capacity, the Luggage, may not have been written as a parody of game inventories, but it certainly reads like one.

After watching the game’s intro the player knows that it’s a story about a dragon on the rampage in the city of Ankh-Morpork, but Rincewind doesn’t yet. Look out the window at the distant figure of the dragon, labelled as ‘shape’ and he comments that it’s obviously a plot element, or it would have a better label. In that kind of moment the game extends in a worthwhile way from both Discworld and point’n’click games. In others, its puzzles are far too obtuse to give the feeling of figuring out the story, going a long way beyond the standard of the genre in difficulty. That makes for a lot of time going around trying out everything possible, which means that the world and its characters being enjoyable to spend time with is even more important.

Rincewind’s turn as sarky, put-upon man, dealing with a world around him which is obviously mad, is enhanced by being voiced by Eric Idle. I won’t go into the further links between Monty Python and Douglas Adams, because my history bit at the start was already long enough and because Elizabeth Sandifer already did it excellently, but there is a positive kind of obviousness to that casting too. Likewise, given the comedy fantasy-historic setting of Ankh-Morpork, the presence in the cast of Tony Robinson (throw Blackadder into that web of British humour fiction somewhere too). As a fan of the Discworld books, one of the best parts of the game is hearing familiar characters given voice. Tony Robinson’s take on amoral street peddler Cut-Me-Own-Throat Dibbler, unflappable in the face of having his cons pointed out, played like Baldrick if his obliviousness was a cunning front, is particularly delightful. As a representation of the daft, inventive, funny world of Discworld, the game is a happy success. It fills its inevitable role very well.

However, as a series, Discworld isn’t just daft and inventive and funny. Well it pretty much was to begin with, and remained that way in much popular perception for a long while afterwards. There was a reason Pratchett kept bringing Rincewind back for lazy romps in new places. Discworld would not be as well-loved as it remains if that was all it was, though.

The plot of Discworld the game draws heavily on the eighth novel in the series, Guards! Guards! (1989), which was a distinct turning point in the tone and range of the series and its satire. In it, a dragon is set loose in the city and is eventually stopped with help from the efforts of the under-funded, under-respected, under-the-influence guards of the City Watch, who gain some self-respect in the process. The book turns away from the typical special one born-into-the-role hero of the previous books, giving starring roles to characters in positions that would previously have made them cannon fodder or comic relief alone. The importance of the life and story of every single person is a strong theme throughout the series. Keeping the Watch as leads would have made for a different and less obvious game, but replacing them with Rincewind — a wizard from the parody of privileged academia that is Unseen University — loses that strand of the message.

The other thing that Guards! Guards! brings through strongly is anger at how society is run, and to whose benefit. In its story a manipulative palace insider uses the petty grievances of a bunch of working men to incite them to summon a dragon. He plans to stage a vanquishing and install a puppet ruler, but loses control and instead himself ends up as puppet to the monster he conjured. Pratchett returns repeatedly to the fickle will of the crowd, influenced via the forces of narrative. When the dragon winds up in charge of the city, the most cutting satire is how easily treasure-hoarding and virgin-sacrificing are accepted as the new normal. The people in power in a position to do something quickly fall to collective self-interest, content as long as they believe they’re not supporting the burning of their faces. That kind of seething argument for greater justice became more prominent as the Discworld books went on.

This whole theme, though, gets minimised by the game’s changes to the plot and its wider insistence on prioritising knockabout comedy. No chance is missed for cartoon logic, and even where aspects of the plot like the dragon’s desire for revenge on its summoners are kept, they’re played for laughs There is parody but nothing like the sharp satire of the source material, and it puts humour above anything, including sometimes fidelity to its characters. Across the series Pratchett has a running joke of the university’s orangutan librarian reacting violently to being called a monkey, but the many times the game has slapstick scenes of Rincewind doing that (or similar to other characters) and being bashed on the head doesn’t ring true. He’s the Librarian’s assistant from pretty early on in the series and regardless, if nothing else, his defining cowardice would make him more cautious than that. The game’s humour goes broad again and again. It may well include more jokes about men wearing dresses than it does women, in dresses or otherwise. That doesn’t come out of nowhere — Pratchett never quite got past the temptation to bite on easy jokes even if they sat uneasily with his moral messages — but the game feels closer to his worst early instincts.

To get completely anachronistic, I like to imagine a Discworld point’n’click based instead on much later books in the series. Tiffany Aching, analytical teenager training to be a witch (a position portrayed as being social worker and midwife more than it is magician) would fulfil a need for a level of unawareness and observation as player stand-in really well, and would allow for a game with a very different tone. That could be more than a cartoon romp in a familiar funny world. As it is, Discworld the game is a well-realised vision of Discworld, but it’s a vision of Discworld which was already old hat by the time of its inevitable creation.

Gallup Compact Disc chart, Computer Trade Weekly 3 April 1995 (chart for week to 25 March 1995)

[kehideni]

Here we gooooooooo~

welp,... not gonna miss that guy

ok, so ah.... what’s the point of phase 2?

“they might not be our friends anymore” “i won’t hurt Gar” wellllllll you won’t hurt him but you hardly wanted to help him so far so... good for him i guess atleast you don’t view him as an enemy

WOOP NONSENSE ALERT! The gun that blew up your car with the first shot now can’t pierce the very same object

hmmmmm Kory’s like “I’ll deal with him” *gets her arm scratches* “welp... nope”

Dick apparently has super hearing now~ and so do the gurls

atleast the fight looks good.... when they are not obviously cutting scenes together so the viewer wouldn’t see that there was no actual acrobatics involved

yeah that’s... nope, you just fried your own brain

he’s got super healing, why would a stab wound kill him?

ooooohhh so THAT’S phase 2

poor Gar, not only is the game rigged againts him, he doesn’t stand a chance againts Superboy when the game is not rigged

Tigerboy knows how to land on his feet

that animation looked so good until he bit Superboy....

no way that didn’t kill him

Donna’s face ever looking like she just stepped in dog poo

why did brainwashed tigerboy answer to his name?

“are you ok?” binch he just slammed into an iron pipe with the speed of Mach 1, you tell me

“i know they did something to you” ... how’d you guess? “but we need you Gar” sure as hell didn’t seem like it for a whole damn season

yesssss scratch that snotty kid up

honest to god the tiger’s face looks hella good, but when they need to move him the faults come out

“ok Gar, that was not cool!” xD that cracked me up

“i think he has no idea who we are” hmmmmmmmm i wonder why that is HMMMMMMM JUST A GUESS BUT MAYBE BECAUSE YOU ALL HIGHTAILED OUTTA THE TOWER BEFORE HE WOKE UP??? HMMMMMMMM?????? WHEN DID YOU THINK HE’D LEARN OF YOU?

Logically you send Donna, not like Kory could actually speak in his language, you know... like a few episodes back?

huhh... sure just stand there and watch them brawl it out... don’t try to voice your worry or... dunno... try and help

so now you remember you speak kryptonian... also this is a great time to join the fight 1 person at a time... cuz you know... LOGIC

hey Hawk, so great of you to teleport here for no previously established reason

HAHH Dove only held up a broken glass and was more useful than you lot

OOOOHHH GREAT TIMING FOR B PLOT ARGUMENT

nice of you Batman to do something

oh come OOOOOONNN, smiley face???? from Batman???????? someone go and double check the comics if he ever used smileys

Dick, this is not the time to heroicly stand your back to the brainwashed nakama-enemy

good thing we all DON’T know that kryptonite is his weakness

pppsssssssstt.... kinda obvious that the focus point for Ratchel was on the concrete, try having a plush tiger head in the place of the will-be-cgi-tiger-head and maybe MAYBE they will look like they are looking at each other

you couldn’t have said “when you called out for me” or... “when you held my hand” you HAD to say “when you touched me”... writers... i thought you knew that the internet pays attention to goofy lines like these....

thank GOD you didn’t make her say “so i’m gonna touch you” just like that... i can already hear my alternate-reality-self laughing.

thank you for clarifying that you meant his hand, but maybe you could be more specific and say frontal limb

“imma touch your frontal limb cuz i kno you be me nakama” paraphrasing but this be the jist

all these smiling faces.... i don’t remember them, gj writers~ i have no idea why these smiling faces would be relevant to Gar when they spent together- like - maybe a week

When will we get Gar an outfit that won’t tear up when he transforms? Poor kid gonna catch a cold like that

HAHAHAHAHAH that policecar-prop was obviously on a rail x’D

oh noooo... the rope got his shoulders restricted... it’d be a shame if he decided to just... move his arms up and remove it from himself

WHEN did you guys have the time to tell Ratchel that you want her to voodoo Connor to submission?

Poor Connor... he went through the same cruelty Gar did

“concentrate your fire power at subject 13″ hmm one would have thought they would wanna hightail it out of there or like... be precautious and get a kryptonite bullet ready

Anna... you know i love you as Kory but you gotta practice the airpunch... you don’t punch with a straight arm like that

yeah right... they clap for the murderers who just stopped murdering them hmmm, it’s good that everyone in this city has 4th wall-vision

tf did that thing fall over for NOW?

sheeple... always running lenght-wise not sideways when shit start falling down

this. was. HELLA. stupid

x’’’D THIS WAS SUCH A HELLA STUPID DEATH I ACTUALLY LAUGHED OUT LOUD

EVERY REACTION AFTER A STUPID DEATH LIKE THIS BECOMES COMICAL!!! THAT’S NOT HOW YOU DRAMA!!!! OH MY GAWD XDDDDD

I’M DYING FROM LAUGHTEEEER

she’s sleepin’ :’D atLEAST put some burn marks on her or something if you wanna kill her in such a BS way

She’s so pale for all i know she could have died from hypothermia xD

Nightwing, are your clothes made out of plastic that you managed to get her down from the electric post or was this some supervillain electricity that choose to kill Donna but not you

siiiiighhhhh such a stupid scene...

(i haven’t told many people this before but i had to move a dead body once, and eventhough she was a person i could easily lift,i couldn’t manage to get her dead body out of a CHAIR to the BED that was right next to it

you know why? Because they don’t hold their weight for you! Comically enough, a dead body behaves very liquid like, the way Hank holds Donna’s dead body - no matter how strong he is - if he doesn’t have a good enough grip on her(which he doesn’t, the actress helps him a great deal with shifting the weight of her booty, also forcing her own body to roll TOWARDS Hank’s body) the body rolls away from your body

But i put this in parenthesis because it’s not a jab at the show just something interesting i thought i’d tell you... also before you all freak out. It was an old lady that died in my shift from a stroke back when i still worked in a nursing home. She sat in her chair eating her dinner, and the next moment i went to check on her and tell her it’s time for bed, she was dead. And as human dignity after death dictates, i and my colleague had to put her body in the bed, dressed in her best clothes and then separated from outside view with a screen)

I didn’t need Batman’s monologue

what you here for Jason... lol bye i guess

gasp IS THAT A GARFIELD LOGAN SCENE I SEE BEFORE ME?

THANK. FKIN. YOU. GRAYSON! Finally owning up for the BIGGEST mistake he made this season

“all i can do is promise that will never happen again” Gar’s face when he said “thanks”. THAT is what i feel... like... ok, that’s good that you promised but it won’t right the wrongs that happened so far, it’s rain after the fire has died down

oh... Heman and Shera... still boring af

“she died saving my life”.... well if only you’d ran sideways~

does ANYONE have a wet towel? I wanna watch it dry...

“what about Hawk and Dove?” bitch imma borrow the headline of Miraculous Ladybug and say: YOU’RE THE SAME FKIN PERSON, NO MATTER WHAT CLOTHES ARE ON YOU

of course everything is thanks to Batman

monologue time no. 2 ... i would not be this bitchy about this if Donna’s death wasn’t a scene ripped from Monty Python

I’m sure those two kids will be alright 8)

[gobydana]

Batsis Gets Poisoned

A/N: This was the result of my five mile run today. Literally came up with then. Got carried away so it is a little long. 

Warning: angst

Y/N woke up not feeling any better then the night before. Her body ached worse then sparring with Cass. Add in her stomach that won’t hold anything down and it made for a bad morning start. Of course she was hoping it was just the flu. No use worrying her family. 

Due to her family all being viliagents, she would need to avoid them in order to not worry them. Maybe there was a Arkham break out that would keep them busy. If not, she could always call Aunt Harley. Her mother, Catwoman did have the woman’s number. It wouldn’t be approved by her father, the big Batman himself, but if it kept her over cautious family off her back, it works. 

She decided to spend the day in an old room that use to be empty. She had turned it into her play room as a kid and later a hideout with pillows and books. Currently she need to study for a test. After all, she was not the top student at Gotham University for nothing. 

Throughout the day, her headache got worse. She kept some crackers nearby to munch on. They seemed to be no help. By the graces of the gods above, none of her overbearing siblings came looking for her. To have a whole day alone in the manor was unusual. Her father must be busy on League items. Hopefully he took Damian with him. 

Around dinner time, she fell asleep. She was so out of it that she missed when her family came barging in the house towards the cave. By the time she woke up, it was already 10pm and she was feeling even worse. In fact, her stomach felt like it was going to vomit. She quickly ran towards her bathroom. 

As she vomited into the toilet, her body started to shake. Cold sweat dripped down underneath her shirt. The sky outside grew darker as she felt worse and worse. Among the haze that was now covering her mind, she could only think that she needed to call someone. Her mom no doubt had no phone on her. 

Luckily, she had a number saved to us in case of emergencies. It rang once before a voice answered.

“Who are you, and how did you get this number.”

“Oracle it’s me Y/N. Dad gave me this number in case of an emergency.” She said. Unknown to her, as her hearing was getting fuzzy, most of it came out soft but thankfully Oracle understood it. 

“Hold on, I am going to put you through.” 

“Batman, I have Little Sparrow on the comns, through that number you gave her.” 

“Patch her through.” Batman said quickly. Oracle didn’t miss the hint of fear though that was present in his voice. A voice that was more Bruce Wayne than Batman at the moment. 

“Little Sparrow, what is wrong.” Bruce said softly, using the nickname her siblings gave her when she was little.

“Dad something isn’t right. I went from feeling bad this morning to barley staying awake. My whole body hurts and everything is fuzzy.” 

“It’ll be okay. Oracle gave me your location, stay put okay? I am coming.” He said before hanging up to talk to Oracle and get ahold of Catwoman. 

In his rush to hang up, he had missed Y/N softly say, “Please don’t hang up, I am scared.” 

One detail that Y/N left out was the blood in her puke and the black spots she was seeing. Her training kicked in and she knew it wasn’t good. She thought maybe if she could just get to the cave where Alfred was. Afterall, it was cold down there and that would feel good. 

Bruce raced through the manor with Catman hot on his heels. She had gotten there as soon as he had. All he had to say was something was wrong with Y/N and she was racing back towards the manor. Both climbed up the stairs towards her room. 

The sight that greeted them was Y/N passed out on the floor. Her skin pale, sweat still dripping down her face. Once Bruce put his hand on her, he felt how warm she had gotten. It wasn’t good. He picked her up and ran towards the cave. 

By the time they got down there, every bat in the city and beyond were in there. Oracle might have let it slip through the comns something was wrong. They were greeted by the sight of worried Selina and Bruce holding Y/N close to him. 

Alfred was on the phone with Dr. Leslie and the rest of the family were gathering medical supplies. Quickly Bruce got her hooked up to an IV and got blood samples. He gave them to Duke to run through the batcomputer. Tim was looking through manor cameras tracking her last 48 hours. 

The whole family went to work. Selina stayed near her talking, hoping maybe their daughter could hear her. Telling her she would be okay, if not for Y/N sake, then for her’s. She couldn’t lose her. 

“Ummm we got issues.” Duke said as the computer popped up the cause of the illness. 

The whole family including Dr. Lesile, who just arrived, gathered around to see the results. Slow acting poison had gotten into her blood stream. Immediately Lesile went to Y/N to see what more she could do for the girl. Bruce stood there staring for a moment till jumping into action. 

The boys went to identifying who would make it. Cass was helping Selina come up with a list of who would have given Y/N Kyle-Wayne poison. Oracle was tracking her whereabouts through the whole city. 

“Bad news B.” Jason said. “This is poison we have linked before to Falcone.

“I have video of one of Falcone’s guys slipping something into her drink last night when she was out.” Oracle chimed in. 

“How would Falcone know Y/N is Batman’s daughter?” Stephanie asked. 

“He wouldn’t.” Selina said as she entered the room. “He knew she was my daughter. I am part of the reason a few of his men went away. Important men.” Selina said with a sad look on her face. He got back at her through her daughter. 

“Find Falcone.” Bruce ordered as he stared at his other children. “But no killing.” 

“What.” Jason and Damian chimed in. 

“Don’t worry, there are fates worse then death.” Nightwing said while getting into the batmobile. 

“Fun reminder that Dick is scary when someone hurts his loved ones. Like really scary.” Tim said as he hoped into the batmobile last. 

“Lesile!” Bruce hollered. 

“Alfred and I are already on the anti-dote. Thankfully or well unthankfully, depending how you look at it. We have dealt with it before at the hospital.”

As she headed towards the medical room, where Y/N laid, Bruce turned to Selina. He took her into his arms as she finally let out the tears that she had been holding, not wanting anyone to see them. 

“She is going to hate me.”

“You know she won’t. She is not that type of person.” He said while his batsuite got wet from the tears. 

“I wish she would.” Selina sniffed. “The last month she has been asking to go to this new brunch place. Instead I have been too busy dealing with the Falcone guys and animal abuse. Now she is hurt because of it.” 

“We can take her there once she is better. She has asked me too, we both have been too busy. Once she is awake, we will make it up to her.” He said while softly kissing her head. 

After Lesile gave her the shot with anti-dote, they moved her into her bedroom. An IV and heart monitor were hooked up to her while she slept. The rest of the family slowly piled in. While they were showered, bruises and cuts littered their bodies. For once, Bruce didn’t ask for a report. Nightwing just nodded in silent confirmation that Falcone’s men were taken care of. 

The whole family waited for her to wake up. Her bedroom was filled with people on the couch, on her dresser. Jason was reading a book she left on a nightstand while leaning against her bed. 

As the noon sun shined through the window, Y/N started to stir in her sleep. As she opened her eyes, she saw her mom and dad next to her. The rest of the family seemed to fill up every inch of her room that once seemed big. All of them started talking at once, it started to overwhelm Y/N. 

“Everyone quite.” Selina said. “You okay Y/N.” 

“Yeah. I also seemed to get a small jest of what happened.” She replied softly. 

“Please don’t scare us like that again.” Barbara said. 

Batsis weakly laughed at the remark. For being the only non-cape wearing person in there, she seemed to be in the most danger. 

“I’ll try my best.” 

“Good.” Stephanie said. “Now I heard a movie marathon helps.” 

“Can I pick it?” Y/N said.

“Being poison does qualify you to pick the movies.” Tim replied. 

“Great Monty Python and the Holy Grail quote along and more geeky movies.” Damian replied. 

“Hell yes.” Duke shouted. 

“That’s it, you two are sitting next to each other. I don’t need to hear you guys scream the quotes.” Stephanie said. 

The family started making their way to the movie room as Dick gave Y/N a piggy back ride. They got settled in. Y/N under a lot of blankets with Bruce and Selina near him. Tim put the movie in. 

“Once you are better sweetie, why don’t you, your dad, and I go to that new brunch place.” Selina said. 

“I would love that.” She said as she nestled under the blankets. 

As the movie played, Bruce and Selina couldn’t help but smile as she was safe and happy once again. 

Tagging: @superwhoteen @the-shadow-of-atlantis