#new tablet who dis

[cardhamine]

POV 4 years after nearly dying in a family fun complex, the kid you adopted wants you to hurry up and open your birthday presents because he got you a co-op game that definitely isn't the one he's been asking for himself the last 3 months

[luck-of-the-drawings]

IM SO IN LOVE WITH VAMPIRES!! and boy do i love THE SUCKENING!! VERY excited to see the misadventures of sad wet cat, sharp angry cat, and the COOLEST cat i ever did see

[inusmasha]

Pride & Prejudice (2005): Edo Period AU ft. SessKik & InuKag

Hi guys! Sorry for being MIA! Has it really been 9 months!?

Life has calmed down a little so I have time to work on AU projects again c: buuut I changed a few things !

I'll be illustrating key parts of the Pride and Prejudice (2005) movie in hopes of opening the fandom's eyes to SessKik romance... but it's going to take place during The Tokugawa era (also known as the Edo Period). I love historical fiction and have been reading up a ton about feudal society.

Originally, in the manga, Inuyasha is set in the Sengoku Period (The Warring States Era) where feudal warlords dropped like flies due to the constant political warfare. Later on, Samurai tried to establish "order" by assigning people into a strict hierarchy of social classes.. Which reminded me of P&P.

On top you have the Emperor, who didn't really wield any political power at this point and was more of a 'figurehead'.

Then there was the Shogun. These military men were the supreme commanders and head of government. I think it makes sense to have the Great Dog Demon be a shogun.

Beneath them were the Daimyo. They were the regional warlords and noble families that ruled over the lowly foot-soldier/samurai. They made up the upper-class but only those with close familial ties to the Shogun would be able to wield political power. Shogun gave land to daimyos to rule in exchange for loyalty. Also! There were "outer" Daimyo who barely hung on to what little perks they had since they had few real allies. Reminds me of the Bennet Fam.

...Everyone else (farmers, merchants, & peasants) weren't respected until the turn of the century brought about that dank rapid economic prosperity.

TBH there was no Japanese 'middle class' like there was in Europe during the time of Pride and Prejudice so I take a lot of creative license.. I'm taking elements I loved from the movie and combining them with the Ukiyo-e art that was so popular during the Edo period. I can't freaking wait to glam everyone up in kimonos, ribbons and pearls.

I hope that made sense! I love overcomplicating things ;p

Dedicated to my dearest friend @magical-campanula who inspired all this with her beautiful mind and HCs!

[thisdarlingluna]

The beastie has arrived. Won't be able to crack it open until Xmas Eve but I'm gonna need the time to clear my desk.

[charliemwrites]

Oooooh I finally did it!! Mafia au part 6! A little bit of that sweet angst/comfort.

Content: Violence, Previous Injury (mentioned), Panic Attack (non-descriptive)

Let it be said: Johnny’s no snitch.

Outgoing (“loud” Simon would grumble) as he is, he doesn’t run his mouth about anything important. Doesn’t talk business over a pint or boast his connections in bar disagreements. Doesn’t drop names, flash heat, throw around the weight of his employer. Has never spilled a single fucking secret, not for knives, acid, a fucking gun to his head.

Oh, and please don’t tell the boss.

Let it also be said: Johnny is loyal.

He would happily lay down his life for any of his comrades, lives and dies for SpecGru – for Price. And even though you’re new, you’re one of them now. You’ve quickly found and secured your place in Price’s inner circle, different as you may be. Johnny would go to war for you, and your silly pink sticky notes.

Still, keeping something – anything from the boss. Even a private matter like this…

It happened on SpecGru property, that makes it SpecGru business. And it happened to you, which makes it Price’s business.

That you don’t already know that is… well, that’s between you and the boss. Johnny’s already too involved as it is. (Not that he regrets helping you. Not a bit. If he had his way, that little prick would have left with his teeth in his pocket and a new appreciation for his remaining thumb).

So now Johnny is stuck. He likes you; he really does. That you trust him with something so personal isn’t lost on him, especially in this line of work. He also has a healthy fear of your wrath. (You may not carry any weapons he’s seen, but you’ve got Price grimacing when you narrow your eyes just so. Johnny knows where his cupcakes are made, and he likes them without arsenic, thank you). So, personally, he wants to be able to honor your request to keep the matter private.

But then there’s Price, and whatever he’ll do to Johnny if – when – he finds out about all this.

Johnny’s solution?

“Christ, Gaz, ya shoulda seen it. Never seen the little miss tell someone off like that. Graves woulda been shakin’ in his boots. Will have to ask security for a recording of it.”

Gaz, unimpressed with Johnny’s volume, rolls his eyes and walks away, muttering about tea for his sudden headache. And Price, sitting at his desk, twitches and reaches for his phone.

Mission: accomplished.

Not the most elegant, but he’s a mafia lieutenant, not a fuckin’ spy. Now, to get those pastries you like before Price sees the footage.

“Luv?”

You glance up from the expense reports you’ve been working through for the better part of an hour. Mr. Price is leaning in the doorway to his office, shoulder to the jamb. There’s… an odd look on his face. You’ve never seen it before, don’t have it categorized in your mental files.

“Yes, boss?” you ask, straightening up.

“A word?”

You blink. That’s… different. You don’t like it.

Price is a steady sort of man. Not predictable, but consistent. That this is new, unusual, unfamiliar, makes you uneasy. Reminds you of your last boss, who could call you into his office with an affable grin, only to spend thirty minutes berating you for anything and everything he could think of.

Price has never done that, nothing even close… but you can’t suppress the slight shake in your hands as you smooth your skirt down. Hide it with a little flick of your wrists before grabbing for your ever-trusty tablet. Hell, you probably don’t even need it, but at this point it’s practically a comfort item. Maybe you should name it, put some googly eyes on it.

“Sweetheart?”

You startle a bit. Realize your feet have already carried you into his office and followed him right to his desk. Except instead of standing at his elbow as usual, you’re facing him across his desk. Like you did during your interview with him, when you were still strangers. Like you used to do for your previous boss.

“Oh, sorry, sir,” you chirp, forcing your usual brightness, “those expense reports, ya know? What did you need me for?”

Without a word, he spins his computer monitor around. Your brow furrows as you process the video playing on the screen. You. Soap. Brandon. Your stomach sinks.

There’s no sound, but there doesn’t really need to be. Even in profile, the expressions are crisp – high end cameras. You feel numb as the scene plays out all over again. You and Brandon snipping at each other back and forth. Your rigid spine, stiff shoulders. Brandon’s sleezy confidence. Soap, getting visibly aggravated as the seconds pass.

And there it is, the moment you spun on your heel, done with the conversation, and Brandon reached for you.

When you see Soap’s hand snap out – just a blur on the screen – you have to sit. Muscle memory collects your tablet in your lap, sweaty hands stacking neatly on top of it. Your heart is beating either too fast or too slow.

Your eyes stay locked on the screen until you and Soap disappear into the elevator, and the video stops.

“Should I play the elevator footage as well?” Price asks, voice low and quiet. “That comes with sound.”

It takes all your years of learned discipline and cultivated poise to resist shrinking in on yourself. It does not, however, stop your eyes from burning.

“Sir,” you say, struggling to keep your voice even, “I am so sorry.”

There’s a beat of tense silence as you gather yourself, throat getting tighter and tighter. Your head is spinning with fear and anxiety. What he’ll say, what he’ll do. How you could possibly damage control this.

“I-I don’t even know how he found out where I work,” you say, “and Soap w-was just trying to help. If I’d known that would happen, I would have taken it outside.”

You can barely look at Price as your voice break midway through, the panic leaking into your tone even as you stay frozen in place.

“Did we – is he suing? Is – is that why—?”

The tears escape despite your efforts, dripping fast and down your cheeks as you shudder in a breath. You can’t pay for a lawsuit, especially not if you’re fired over this. And you don’t want to lose this job. You love this job, you love—

“Oh, darling, what a mess you’ve made of yourself.”

You sniffle as Price rounds his desk and kneels in front of you, plucking his handkerchief from his breast pocket. He tuts at you when you open your mouth to protest, already blotting at your cheeks with a surprisingly gentle touch.

“There now, no need to cry,” he soothes, thumbing away another tear before it can fall. “I know it takes you ages to get your eyeliner right. This is nothing to ruin it over.”

“But…”

“I’m not angry, luv,” he continues, voice still low and quiet. This time, it doesn’t make your shoulders tense. “Wasn’t before and definitely not now. Chin up, there’s a dear.”

“Y-you’re not?” you warble.

“Not a bit,” he answers. “Not at you, at least.”

“Then why…?” You gesture weakly at the computer screen.

He sighs, something almost fond passing over his face. “Darling, you could have been hurt. Imagine if Soap hadn’t been there. All of us on the top floor, waiting for you to get back, not knowing something was wrong.”

He shakes his head, cradling your cheek with the same hand that brushed away your tears.

“You’re one of mine, you understand? Anything that happens to you is my responsibility,” he explains. “And I didn’t… enjoy that you want to keep something like this from me.”

You drop your eyes in shame. Of course. An employee assaulted on company ground, his personal assistant no less. Price would never stand for that sort of thing. He looks out for his own, looks out for you.

“Hey, look at me, luv. None of that now,” he coaxes. “I just want to get to the bottom of why you didn’t want to tell me.”

It occurs to you that that tone you heard earlier might have just been genuine worry and maybe… a bit of hurt. You twist your hands in your lap as you gather your words.

“I didn’t… it wasn’t because of you,” you murmur. “I just… was so embarrassed. And I didn’t want to make it your problem. I’m supposed to make your life easier, not harder.”

He huffs, but you’re relieved to see wry amusement on his face now.

“No more of that,” he orders, as softly as he when he wiped your face. “Am I understood?”

“Yes, sir.”

“There’s a love.” He gently pinches your cheek, then stands. “Stay here, I’ll get you a cup of water. Take a moment, yeah?”

You nod, sniffling again. He squeezes your shoulder as he passes, and you finally let yourself breathe. Not getting fired, not getting sued. And Price isn’t mad at you. Christ, he needs to work on his approach.

“Kyle.”

“Yeah, boss?”

“Look into that knob from the lobby. And the little miss’s last boss.”

“You’ve got it.”

First | Previous | Next

Masterlist

[help-itrappedmyself]

Dead On Main part 7

Masterpost

dedicated to @cervinebotanist and @leafyeyes417 for responding so quickly and with such enthusiasm to part 6. Thank you for the encouragement and support.

Danny takes a deep breath. He can hear scrambling from somewhere else in the car, but he can’t pay attention to what’s happening as he focuses inward. He closes his eyes, and reaches inside himself.

Jason has a tiny baby core! Danny almost coos at it, but it’s so underdeveloped that he’s sad instead. Danny can feel ectoplasm in himself, in Jason’s body. But it isn’t enough. This ectoplasm has been reused, reduced, recycled one too many times. It’s got barely enough to stay alive left in it. Jason is mostly being sustained by his human half right now. It feels like play-doh that turns to dust where it should stretch, dried-out and old. It makes him even more sad. And slightly ill. But the sadness makes the rioting ectoplasm calm back down inside him.

Danny opens his eyes. He’s slightly disoriented, but calm now, eyes no longer glowing. They had stopped the car. He looks at Tim, who is leaning against his door and braced against it and Dick’s chair, giving Danny as much space as possible. His hand is almost on the door handle and his tablet on the floor. Dick and Bruce are exchanging panicked looks in the front seat, both now unbuckled for some reason and completely turned to face the backseat.

“Hey, speaking of ectoplasm, this body really needs some.” Danny informs them. “If it doesn’t get some new ectoplasm soon his core is going to cease functioning, and that would be really bad, and possibly irreversible.” 

“Uhhh.” Dick’s panicked look is turning straight to confusion, as is everyone else’s. “What?” 

“I didn’t realize that Jason was, I mean he had mentioned he died, but he- well, I guess I didn’t want to talk about it over the phone either. Does make it easier to talk about since we’re the same, but of course we couldn’t have known yet. But his core needs some help, do you not have access to ectoplasm back home?” Danny is rambling, brain spinning at the thought of how much he and Jason have in common. This big thing that no one else would truly understand by each other. And Vlad, sort of, but nobody likes Vlad. “It’s amazing that we ended up soulmates. He’s only the third person in the world I’ve even heard about with this condition. How long has he been without ectoplasm? Is he having trouble finding any, or does he not know he needs it? Either way, I’m giving him some as soon as possible.” Danny doesn’t know whether he should freak out over that fact that his soulmate is as dead as he is, that he’s currently dying from lack of ecto, or that his soulmate’s entire family is probably going to end up learning about him and ghosts, or the fact that he is currently taking another body that the GIW is going to want to study straight to them. All of these things seem like great reasons to freak out on their own, so all together he is just panicking.

Danny doesn’t seem to be able to breathe. 

“Hey, come on, that’s fine, you can totally give Jason some… ectoplasm.” Dick says.

“Danny, you have to breathe, okay.” Tim is much calmer than Dick, so Danny focuses on him as Bruce and Dick whisper in the front. “Danny, match my breathing.” Danny stares at Tim, who is making very exaggerated breathing movements, and tries to time his breathing to match. “We’ll figure everything out, but we don’t need to do it right now.” Tim is still helping Danny, talking calmly, but he says this with enough force to distract the two in the front seat enough for them to shut up for a second. Danny appreciates the bit of silence.

“You need to start driving.” Danny, tells Bruce. “Right now, his human half is sustaining the rest of him almost entirely. If Jason doesn’t get more ecto soon, his other half will die, and I’m not sure what will happen to his human side if that happens. He may die again completely.”

There’s a beat of silence in the car. Bruce stares right into Danny’s eyes.

“You are saying there is an active threat to my son’s life, ” Bruce asks, voice hard. 

Danny nods. Then everyone is buckled back in and Bruce is pulling them back onto the road. 

“You know what’s happening and how to help him?” Bruce asks, voice steady but Danny can sense all the emotion underneath. Bruce is really worried right now, he looks around the car and realizes that Dick and Tim are as well. They both have phones out, but are tense, tuned into his conversation with Bruce.

“Yeah, It’s a simple enough fix, I’m just worried because he’s really…” Danny takes a moment to think of the right word. “Ecto deficient? His core is definitely malnourished, and his body and mind definitely need it. They are being sustained with human stuff for now, but eventually that won’t be enough.” 

“How urgent is this?”

Danny feels for Jason’s core, feeling like he’s invading his privacy, but without other options to check. It’s not cracked, but it’s not fully formed either. Half starved baby core, not even strong enough to present. Its link to an obsession is strong, but frayed enough that Danny can’t tell what it is. The core is not strong enough to produce it’s own ecto, even in response to the obsession being fulfilled. Everything is stable, but strained.

“I’m not an expert, but he’s sustained himself this long. And we’re already on the way. We should be fine, but I’ll keep an eye on it just in case.”

[simp-ly-writes]

Crush

─────── · ·

Pairing: Spencer Agnew x Shy!Reader

─ · · SUMMARY: You try and hide your crush on your co-worker.

─ · · TAGS: mutual pining, gender-neutral pronouns, fluff, hurt/comfort, meet-cute, cheesiness, confessions.

─ · · MASTERLIST | TAGLIST REQUEST | WORDCOUNT: 1,765

─ · · A/N: I told myself I would never write about IRL people nor ever post this or even go back to my smosh phase but somethings in the water today I guess!

─────── · ·

↳ You had originally worked for Good Mythical Morning as one of the leads of the marketing team before you switched over to Smosh as they re-bought the company. You would miss your team, your friends for the past several years dearly. But you were invested in the new challenge of getting these channels back to their glory days with new content and ideas to work on.

↳ You kept to yourself as best as you could as your new co-workers came up to you and introduced themselves by your desk side. Spencer was not the first to come up and say hi to you, in actuality- it was you who rather abruptly walked into him at the end of your first week. The distinct smell Mountain Dew Kickstarter spreader across every fiber, drenching your shirt as it spilled equally over his hoodie.

You remember placing your hands to your mouth in horror, a string of apologies set upon heated cheeks before rushing in to the nearby staff room and back out with a wad of paper towels as you started to dab at his chest before throwing them in his face once remember you did not know your co-workers good enough yet.

Spencer laughed, taking none of it to heart as he dried himself off as best as he could while not making any eye-contact towards you. You apologized once more, extending your hand awkwardly to greet your new acquaintance.

"name," you stated softly in seeing the growing number of people exit the room that he just exited from, it appears the filming just finished for lunch.

"Spencer," he shook you hand, offering a polite smile before looking down the hall. Various cast members you remember meeting slapped him on the shoulder and gave you a wave before continuing down the hall.

"You're not going to report this to HR for anything, right?" you asked, half-joking half not as you looked down to see that your undershirt was indeed visible.

His laugh caught your own as you it died down to chuckles before you rushed towards your car for spare clothes.

─────── · ·

↳ In the next coming weeks, you found your footing once more. Standing behind camera as you recorded little teaser snippets. Quickly edited some pictures for the instagram team and sent off your reports all on your tablet.

↳ You enjoyed sitting towards the back, far away from any possible cameras in a dark corner with your water bottle by your feet. Texting the members of your small team through the group chat as you became lost in your own little bubble before the lights were coming back on.

↳ Looking at the time on your device, you quickly stood up and rushed out the room ahead of everyone else. Your social battery was already low from the mornings meetings and made your way back to your desk

↳ A sudden clearing of someones throat had you jumping out of your chair as Spencer stood at your side water bottle in hand. "You forgot this at set earlier." And placed it on your desk.

"Thank you, Spencer," you said with a smile, doing your best to ignore the way your palms were beginning to sweat and praying that you could go back to your hermit corner.

He offered you a smile in return before exiting the space and back towards his own desk as you slumped in relief. "Tough day?" Courtney asked in a light tone before forcing you towards the lunch table.

─────── · ·

↳ You were growing closer to everyone, making friends with people from other departments and still keeping up with your old co-workers on the weekends. Yet you were still to embarrassed from your first few interactions with Spencer to move your relationship from sharing files or the dreaded small talk.

↳ The audience seemed to be growing to you as well. Somehow your little murmurs to yourself had gotten picked up on the microphone and used in the final edit. When watching with Courtney the most recent episode of TNTL, you were surprised to find that it was you who made Olivia laugh that hard. You were really rooting yourself to this company.

↳ A few cast members and producers had tried to get you to move closer to the cameras for more of your comments or even get you on set as you shook your head violently and turned down every offer- still preferring to stay in the shadows.

↳ Yet even when doing your best to hide away, Spencer would sneak his way over with a snack or offer to review what clips you decided on for the reel later that day. You felt childish in many ways on how afraid you were to speak with him, using short sentences or nods of your head but he never took them as rude and was in a way, way too understanding that lead you to feel how you do currently.

─────── · ·

↳ You hated everything to do with Spencer. You hated how much he would always check in on everyone and somehow find all your little hiding spots in the office and on set. Hated the way his smile and laugh would make your heart race. Hated the videos he would attach to his emails that he thought you would like, and you did.

↳ You despised how he wouldn't force you to talk, yet he would just sit there with you at lunch or offer to walk you to your car after work. Your heat couldn't say no nor did your co-workers allow you to as Courtney was practically shoving you both out the door without another word.

↳ A few of them even asked if you did in fact have a crush on the Director and by the look on your face and the shake in your hands, they knew the answer all to well.

─────── · ·

↳ You stated to feel indebted for your shyness as you offered Spencer a fresh can of Mountain Dew during lunch or even provided morning pasteries for the both of you. The whole office took note of his smile that day while filming and how you both started to work at one another's desks.

↳ The more time you spent together, the more confident you grew and you thought to be getting over your crush now. You would have your chair closer to the front of the set, Spencer would often stand or sit beside you between breaks- resting his arm on the back of your chair as he would peer over to see whatever was on your tablet.

↳ Rumours spread, you could practically feel the eyes for sure on your back as you walked around the office together. HR had even sent you a few hinting emails that had you flashing back to your first week working at Smosh.

↳ Cameras were picking up on it too. The attention was growing all too much, your feels were growing all too much before you were taking a step back and allowing more opportunities for your team as you took a step back.

↳ Of course, Spencer took notice of this as well. Asking around, and even once during filming where you had gone only to find you put other people to film the clips and take the photos.

─────── · ·

↳ "Are you okay," Spencer asks, bursting into your new office space as you stood up straight from your desk, a smile a bit to wide as you stiffly welcomed him into the space.

↳ He rounded your desk, sitting upon it, concern written in his features with the slightest tilt to his head. You fumbled with your fingers, struggling to come up with words, "Im okay, just taking a break is all- working on other things."

"I'm just worried for you my friend, never mind work. Are YOU, doing okay?" Spencer pressed, knowing that the answer you gave wasn't entirely truthful.

↳ Friend. The word wounded you as you blinked away tears, suddenly feeling ridiculous. You were an adult and yet this stupid crush you had was coming in the way of everything you worked so hard towards.

"Yes. I am doing okay, thank you for checking up on me."

─────── · ·

↳ You hoped that the time apart would help you, only finding yourself hurting more. You fell right back into the schedule you and Spencer developed together and you hated to admit to yourself but you had never felt better.

↳ They were filming who meme'd it? And yours had yet to come up until now. It would be your first seconds fully on camera as everyone cheered you on before hand. The comments from earlier in the week were excited to finally see who you were, that night you had even found a compilation of every time Spencer mentioned you, to your suprise it was over 5 minutes long- or maybe you just watched it a few dozen times.

↳ Nonetheless, your meme was instantly guessed by the man. His eyes immediately found your own from behind the camera as you started to shrink away, slipping down the couch and onto the floor was a blush as he calmly wrote your name. Shayne seeing this laughed, it echoed the room as he and everyone else also knew the answer from your combined reaction.

↳ Everyone else in the office was loving it. You meme'd your first time meeting with poorly drawn MS-Paint visuals and a simple caption and as your name and picture flashed up on the screen. Cheers rung throughout the room as one of your team members gently rubbed your back in reassurance

↳ After gaining back your will to live, you were suprised to find a pair of arms bringing you into a hug. "I am so proud of you, first time on camera!" Spencer spoke into your hair, you could feel his smile as you stood there still in shock before retuning the action.

↳ Not knowing if it was the adrenaline still running after the showing, the physical comfort, or what you thought to be hearing his heart beating as fast as you own, you blurted out to the shock of many others still cleaning up after the shoot- "I like you a lot."

Spencer chuckled, bringing you back into a hug as you hide your face in his neck from the cheers, "I like you a lot too. But please now finish your turn on game pigeon 8-ball."

─────── · ·

[driaswrld]

cash in, cash out — gojo satoru and geto suguru.

wc : 1.7k

summary : the one where the boys pick the kids up, satoru loses his wallet, megumi almost throws up, the twins argue color theory, tsumiki gets the aux and suguru has a coupon.

part of : the star paradox collection.

notes : this had me cackling a bit as i wrote it i love the family dynamics esp since this is when the trio is new to the kid thing (around 2009) ALSO yes, suguru has a love for y2k girl groups : pussycat dolls being one of em don't @ me gege told me it's canon.

other : fem!reader, rs label undefined so can be read as platonic or poly (they're lowk dating w/o knowing) mentions of unsafe (?) driving?? mentions of bribery and also tomfoolery and shenanigans

current casette : father stretch my hands pt.1 - kanye west

“—now we do headcount.” Suguru turns in his seat as Satoru slows the car and shifts the gear stick to neutral. “If you’re hungry, say I!” Satoru raises a hand up, his knuckles smacking against the roof of the interior, and Suguru internally dies.

“You’re hopeless.” Tsumiki laughs to herself, rolling the window beside her down, leaning against the frame, spring breeze warming her cheeks.

“I…” Mimiko raises her tiny fist upwards, mimicking Satoru, all while Nanako unclicks their joint seatbelt and breathes a puff of air, exasperated and hair a mess.

Megumi grunts, giving a weak thumbs up. He almost looks like he’s about to throw up.

The car ride was… something to say the least—

“—buckle the seatbelt already, brat!”

“—swallow your spit before you talk, you pig.”

“Steer the car for me, Suguru.”

A click reverberates through the car as Satoru unclicks his seatbelt and turns, ready to dive out of the driver's seat and into the backseat of the car, with arms outstretched to grab ahold of six year old Megumi’s neck.

Suguru’s arm flails to the side as he steadies the abandoned steering wheel from the passenger seat.

“Why didn’t name pick us up?” Mimiko mumbles, clutching onto her strawberry colored doll to her chest.

Ignoring the repeated smacks of Megumi’s foot to the side of Satoru’s cheek, Tsumiki shrugs, gaze fixed outside the window at other cars passing by. “She had work, I think—”

“So we’re stuck with the idiots.” Megumi grunts, and Suguru’s head whips around, lips morphed into a thin line.

Pride, oh sweet pride. Nanako, busy typing away at some cute game on her tablet, looks up for a second and locks eyes with Suguru, who withers a little under her gaze.

“He called you an idiot, Geto-san.” She says, ever the little instigator.

“Take the wheel, Satoru.”

But anyways.

Satoru huffs, almost pouting as the car in front of them stalks forward into the KFC drive thru. “It wasn’t even that bad,” he murmurs as he shifts the gear stick once more, moving the car forward.

Suguru can only chuckle nervously. “Yeah, not too bad…”

Behind Satoru’s back, he gives the kids a funny look, and they all snicker quietly. Well, save for Megumi who’s bordering on car sickness from that messy car ride.

“Alright,” Satoru mumbles to himself before he pushes his sunglasses up to rest in his hair, one arm hanging out the window, looking over his shoulder for a brief moment to check everyone over. “What does everyone want off the menu?”

Honestly, he’s a little proud of himself and Suguru.

Usually, you’re the one who handles picking all the brats up after school, but somehow, the boys managed to do it.

Although, it did take a bit of crisscrossing with seatbelts shared in pairs of two— hey, at least they’re all in one piece, right!

“Twister!” Nanako exclaims with a grin and Mimiko nods along with her twin sister, setting her doll down in her lap with a smile that Suguru mirrors, something so small making him feel so… soft inside. “I want the one with the sweet flavored chicken inside—”

“I want the spicy one.” Nanako nods along, turning her attention back to her tablet, clicking away.

Satoru hums, turning his head a little to the side, and Tsumiki mumbles, “Maybe just a chicken sandwich… with some coleslaw too.” He looks to Megumi, who still has his mouth twisted into something between a frown and a pout, so cute—

“And what do you want, Megs?” Suguru asks before Satoru can, as the car treks forward in the drive thru line, drawing closer to the order speaker.

“Whatever Tsumiki gets, I’ll get that too.” Megumi shrugs a little and a smile stretches on Satoru’s face — though he hides it well, straining his head forward.

(Mimiko can see him through the side mirror but he doesn’t even remember that.)

After ordering and making it halfway down the length of the drive thru, there’s only two cars ahead until the pay window.

Suguru is helping Tsumiki plug the aux cord into her ipod touch — a birthday gift from Satoru.

“I don’t think the cord’ll fit,” Tsumiki mumbles, peering over his shoulder, head leaning against the headrest. “It’s probably too big or something.”

All while Mimiko and Nanako are arguing over a dress up game on their tablet.

“She looks better in purple—”

“But I like the yellow better—”

Megumi narrowly dodges Satoru’s elbow as he bends his arm to rummage through the storage compartment of the armrest.

“Don’t worry too much, Tsumiki—” He mumbles, haphazardly searching for another aux cable, and his wallet, because for some reason he didn’t feel it in his pocket just now. “Suguru’s good at making all kinds of things fit—”

A smack to the side of his head sends his sunglasses flying off his head into Nanako’s lap, and the twins share a look with each other. “We should try sunglasses on her—”

“I don’t want her to look like Gojo-san—”

Megumi snickers just as Suguru snatches the shorter aux cable from Satoru’s hand.

Tsumiki tilts her head to the side, a grin reaching her lips once Suguru finally gets the aux connected. “Hold on,” Satoru whispers to himself, shifting back in the driver’s seat and moving forward to take the place of the car that was just in front. “Suguru, I can’t find—”

“Check under your seat or something.” Suguru cuts him off, scrolling through the sheer ridiculous list of songs on Tsumiki’s ipod touch — most of which are Taylor Swift and a few J-Pop groups. “It’s not there.” Satoru huffs in defiance.

From where Megumi’s sitting slumped in the backseat, he can see the shadow of Satoru’s billfold laying under his seat.

Naturally, Megumi wants to watch him squirm a little. Afterall, Suguru told him to look there and he was too proud to, so…

Satoru’s phone vibrates from inside the open glove compartment where it’s charging.

“I’m sure I had it in my side pocket…” He mumbles to himself, and Suguru gives him a look of absolute defeat with a hint of nonchalance.

“Well I don’t have any money on me—” The timing couldn’t be worse really. “Of course you don’t. Because all of you freeload off me—”

Megumi rolls his eyes, “As if you don’t make six figures.”

The phone vibrates again, and it’s the least of Satoru’s problems, really.

“Is that all I am to you? Some bank?”

Because here he is, next in line to pay and he doesn’t have his card in his hand, Suguru is still flat broke as always, you aren’t here and it’s not like the brats in the back have a steady flow of income coming in.

Why didn’t he just set up his damn online accounts when you told him to?

“Maybe you should answer that,” Suguru shrugs, damn near unable to hide his little smile when he comes across a song by the Pussycat Dolls. He has half a mind to say out loud that he’s raising Tsumiki right.

The phone vibrates again.

“Satoru—”

“Jeez, fine, damn.” Satoru is shifting around in his seat like he’s possessed, patting down his pockets, all while the phone keeps vibrating.

He reaches over with a frown, yanking the charger out and answering the phone with a single tap and a curt, “I’m busy right now, what is it?" Putting it on speaker as he leans over in his seat again to search his pants.

“Hello to you too, sunshine.” Your voice echoes through the phone and Satoru winces, pink tinging the tip of his ears. “Sorry name, I just—”

“He lost his wallet and we’re going to starve.”

Megumi leans forward, sticking his head out and leaning against the passenger seat.

Tsumiki and Suguru stifle a laugh, and Mimiko lifts her head with a pout. “But— I don’t wanna starve!”

“Oh, Mimi…” You sigh, damn near ready to punt Satoru into the sun. “That’s not going to happen, Megs is just making fun—”

“I have a coupon for a biscuit from that magazine yesterday,” Suguru says and he locks eyes with Satoru who glares straight at him. “Hey, I’m just suggesting solutions!”

Shoko, who’s sitting beside you in the vacant classroom looks up from the mission report she’s signing up for the both of you and bellows a huge laugh. It really doesn’t help Satoru’s pride at all, and he grabs the phone, clicking it off speaker and hugging it against his ear.

Suguru watches as Satoru slumps in his seat, one arm hanging over the steering wheel and another out the window. A grown man, twirling the side of his hair and pouting.

He doesn’t even think twice before snapping the photo — he ends it off to the twins’ tablet, and they exit their game to open it, giggling into their tiny fists.

“name…”

“I’m not sending you money, Satoru—”

“Please! I promise I just misplaced my wallet,”

The twins pass the tablet over to Megumi who folds his lips to hide his laugh, nudging Tsumiki who leans over to giggle at the picture too.

“Pleaaasee! C’mon, I promise I’ll even set up my account like you told me to—”

Suguru sends a sneaky wink to the kids and they all burst out laughing, to which Satoru whips his head around, only to find everyone ducked down in their seats, suspiciously minding their own business.

Suguru’s even gazing out the car window, a guilty whistle leaving his lips.

“I let you two pick them up one time and—”

Satoru cranes his head out the window, his voice lowering to a whisper. “name, I’m begging you. This is a man’s pride we’re talking about here—”

“You can always use Suguru’s coupon—” You murmur.

“I’ll get a chocopie with your order.”

"I'm literally paying— hey, what do you take me for? I have some semblance of self respect—”

“Two chocopies and a twister.” He looks around before ducking his head again in a whisper, “I’ll even pay for all your meals this month— matter of fact, you can just take my card—”

“Two months, including takeout.” You grumble. “And add an egg tart, I’m sending the money to Suguru right now.”

[unadulteratedsoulsweets]

A DC X DP #19 Our Pharaoh, Your Duke

Imagine dis…

I kept reading about Tucker as a reincarnation of a powerful Pharoh from the Ancient civilization of Egypt and he wouldn’t stop reincarnating as long as people kept making and improving tablets. I don’t know if that is part of the canon or if that episode in DP is just another Sam and Undergrowth situation.

Anyway, just a thought is passing by…

….

Tucker was enjoying his afterlife with his spouses, Danny Phantom the High Ghost King in the Infinite Realm, and Sam Manson the heir and apprentice to the Ancient of Nature Undergrowth. All three of them were enjoying a rare day off that over-laps each other’s schedules. Tucker became the high leader also known as The Pharaoh in the Egyptian section of the Infinite Realms when the old ruler wished to pass on and when he was able to prove himself to be powerful enough to protect his section in the Realms as well as wise enough to lead them to prosperity. Add the fact that he is married to the High King and bump up other ghosts’ attitudes toward him as he is one of the official consorts of the new King.

The trio was just in a middle of a picnic when Tucker started to feel dizzy accompanied by a headache. Both of Tucker’s partners look at him with worry and concern in their eyes, as Tucker is about to reassure them that he was fine when darkness suddenly invaded his eyes.

…

Tucker is so sure that he has his reincarnation in control but the fact that he suddenly had clarity after months in the standard of his new body. Tucker felt panic fill him, A powerful entity or not every time he reincarnates, he forgets his life before and during his time in the Infinite Realms to not disrupt the normal flow of events, he only recovers his original memories when he was in the brink of death or something is need to change.

He also is worried about whatever his spouse would do as he remembered being in their presence when he was forcibly reincarnated. But by the looks of it, whoever did target him knew nothing about the complexity of the cycle thus having his memories with him along with some abilities that were muted to something more discreet. Tucker was just glad that it was him instead of his spouse.

…

As a child, Tucker no wait his new name is Duke Thomas, took it upon himself to explore this new world as it is taking his spouses a while to find him, which led him to believe that this universe may be part of a small sector of which Clockwork cannot interfere due to the delicate relationship between time and its citizens. Tucker was ecstatic when he had seen the futuristic appeal around him but felt disappointed when he had a need that only the rich and those who have connections can own them. He felt his eyes widen at the mention of aliens and other world beings and people around seemingly saving the world daily, not because of the heroes his lovely husband is an interdimensional/universal Hero and King, but because it has aliens which made him think about the opportunities of bragging rights to his husband the moment, they reunited.

When Tucker/Duke took notice of the city that his parents decided to call home, he was already thinking about his wife’s reactions will be, it seems she will either fall in love with the architecture that screams everything goth and the amount of gargoyle around each building or joins a rogue named poisoned Ivy to her crusade towards nature. It also seems that some of his powers mutated that seems to focus on his eyes, to accommodate this new universe or is it to accommodate this new body, he wondered.

As he was growing up, he began to have doubts about his so-called ordinary family as Danny’s luck rubbed them off the moment they all said I do at the altar. He just hopes that it is something he can handle future he could handle. There have been rules and laws about protecting people with power that were later named as Meta humans, he breath a sigh of relief when he saw no mention of the Infinite Realms from all data base.

…

When Bruce took him into his ward it took everything in Tucker/Duke to not scream fruit loop at the billionaire much more when he discovered a hidden base below his mansion’s basement, he doesn’t know that if Bruce is an upgrade is a degrade at the fury persona. It just never occurred to him that one day he will be a daytime vigilante like the origins of his husband. Honestly, he can’t help but have a new profound respect for his husband when he was just starting, he may be in the daytime schedule but it still took time to adjust. He also had a family of an experienced team from the start yet Danny has only him, Sam, and his sister as safety nets, he is so going to spoil Danny the moment they all saw each other.

The moment he laid eyes on Jason he can’t help but hiss quietly at his state. A liminal at the verge of hunger, no wonder his random outburst of anger kept getting worse each time he lost himself. With little to no materials that can handle the contaminated ectoplasm as well to turn it into a pure ectoplasm he was able to make a filter, yet it takes too much time to purify a liter of it yet reveals a small vial of a pure version. Yet it was better than nothing, whenever he was tasked to get them treats and coffee, he would always put the small vial of pre-ectoplasm into his drink which greatly improved his mood but unfortunately, he was the one who kept doing errands as Jason won’t drink anything else without his secret ingredient. Cass had already noticed him doing something to Jason’s drink but shrugged it off seeing that it was improving his mood, but he can’t help but feel that there is another shoe about to drop.

…

He was right, there was another shoe waiting to drop. You know, with his experience with Danny Tucker should have already known not to jinx things.

A group of archeologists found a new hidden tomb deep within Egypt and decided to go exploring yet the new guy on the job seemed to have done something and unleashed an endless number of Egyptian soldiers that seem to attack everything in sight. Though they are not killing anyone anyone who was sliced with their weapons is immediately teleported to a prison deep below the surface and forced to live a life of hard manual labor like a slave.

Tucker/Duke was shaken awake by Stephanie as the news of the Egyptian soldiers made their way to the mainland and the soil of the US. Much worse is that these soldiers found themselves at Gotham harbor and Batman is calling in every vigilante in Gotham to hold off the army while the JLD finds a way to undo the mess, every member of the magical side of the JL has already interrogated the new archeologist whether he had stolen something or he had disrespected someone in the site. Duke was pretty sure he heard Constantine grumble at the fact that this would be much easier if mind control magic is present but no, it just had to be neither of the common reason when an army of the dead raises themselves from the dead.

Now when Tucker/ Duke was wakened up after he had just gone and stayed awake for the past 14 hours straight due to an exam that his dumb professor insisted on having despite having no to little effect on one’s final grades as well as a case that needed his vigilante self his full attention, much to say he is not happy.

…

At the battleground, other members of the JL have already gone into Gotham to aid Batman and his associates while others were able to evacuate the civilians and now joining in the fight. Every person fighting is starting to feel hopeless as this Egyptian army kept coming back at them while their fighters are getting wary and tired at each wave they faced. As some of the people of the JL were about to succumb to what looked like their inevitable fate there come Signal in his yellow-clad suit and looked like he just crawled out of bed, climbed the Wayne tower with a megaphone in one hand, and proceeded to… scold the army?

Some of them blinked at the ridiculousness while some seem to pinch themselves at the absurdity of the situation. How Signal kept screaming at the undead army how his GPA and sleep is much more important than their so-called invasion to return the Ancient civilization of Egypt to its former glory. As jaws began to drop as all undead Egyptian soldiers seems to lower their heads in shame as they listen to Signal scold them for what looked like a half hour scolding before he heaved a deep breath and ordered the soldiers to go back where they came from and return the prisoners to the living world.

Just moments before each JL and JLD members try to reboot their respective minds at what had just transpired a crack was heard seemingly echoing throughout the ruins and a green portal began to form. There, two beings came through a black-haired woman with plants crawling up to her arms and legs with a wreath on top of her head and a white hair man with a crown floating above his head and a cape that looked like made out of stars dragged Signal by the arm and dragged him back to the portal. Now all heroes are scrambling to make sense of what had happened in a matter of minutes as well as trying to get back their youngest brother back, Duke may be older than Damian but he was the latest one to be adopted thus making him the youngest by their standards.

…

Back in the Infinite Realms Duke is quietly sleeping sandwiched and snuggled between the loves of his life while wearing his Pharaoh regalia he just can’t help but feel like he had just forgotten something.

Meh, he’ll tackle that after he had his full rest with both Sam and Danny’s arms and presence beside him.

…

PS: If someone out there wanted to continue or make a fic about this you are free to do so, don’t forget to tag me though.

[elaemae]

The premium version of human is here to wreck house, mfs.

[Twst x Obey Me!AFAB!reader]

CHP. 4

PREVIOUS CHP.: PROLOGUE 3

Thank you guys for the likes, reblogs and comments.

Also, to the people who became my followers, I'll be forever grateful for that😊

CW: When MC gets mistaken as a guy, they get referred to as he/him, but the problem is that there's too many males around the MC.

So, I've decided to color the pronouns blue when it's MC that's being addressed. Just to avoid confusion.

CLARIFICATION: The headmaster, and MC knows that Yuu is from another world, so MC decided to play along and pretend that they're from the same world as Yuu. (The human world where MC came from is mostly similar to the human world that Yuu describes. i.e. landmarks, cultural, knowledge, current trends, anime and manga are all mostly the same.)

REMEMBER: Read this before the chapter.

Experience changes people.

If you see MC doing something you think you won't do and you decide to complain about it, remember this:

• You act the way you do because of the things that you've gone through in your life.

• MC is the same.

• They experienced a lot of traumatic events and almost lost their lives a fuck-ton of times.

• Because of that, they've changed. They've diverged from being you into the MC that they are now.

• The life you're living now shall be treated as the MC's canonical past.

• Also, because The Obey Me!cast feels bad from all the times you suffered and almost died because of them, they tend to overcompensate you.

• You get dressed in the finest of fabrics, most luxurious jewels, as well as housed and fed with the best things that the three realms have to offer.

• You don't take them for granted, but years of living with that lifestyle had raised your standards to new heights and changed the way that you act towards certain things.

• You're free to make up your own head canons if you don't like mine, also y'all can give me feedback if you want so I can improve my work.

• This story will be set a few years after the canon of the Obey Me games.

• • • • •

Who would've thought that it would be a bad idea to try to trick someone who literally reeks of luxury to live in an old, bout-to-fall-apart dormitory?

Well, certainly not Crowley.

That fact became known when 'The shady looking dorm leader™' and also, the tablet decided to tag along with you, Yuu and Crowley, but then had to help Yuu in holding you back so that you wouldn't beat the ever living crap out of the headmaster the moment he dared to bring y'all in front of this rustic establishment and say "It had charm". (Too many You's)

Oh really? really?? Oh you'll see real charm when I beat you straight into the afterlife you greasy son of a bitc–

*Ehem*

It did not end well.

So instead of that, the headmaster had to temporarily put you and your fellow stranded-in-dis-school-human into the infirmary as your temporary abode and promised to fix the shoddy dorm so that it can safely house people in it. (Grim will appear in the future, dw)

*Que Azul tryna make you stay in Octavinelle and you vehemently declining that offer.*

Also, you're starting to get creeped-out by the floating tablet that keeps following you around and won't stop with taking pictures. there's also the small maniacal giggles coming out of the device.

• • • • • •

So there you two are, two people that've been kidnapped by this school's fuckin carriage are now bonding in the infirmary and distracting each other by venting about problems back home. (You two are too wary to be able to sleep properly.)

Like, yes Yuu, I'm in a polyamorous with more than a dozen problematic individuals.

Yes, it works out. somehow

Damn, three assignments due tomorrow all from the same subject? Have you ever tried cheating off of your classmates?

Oh— wait what?! a classmate from biology was caught fucking with a professor in a classroom!? Seriously??

No, I unfortunately no longer have a grasp on the concept of private space and poverty.

Yes, maintaining a relationship with a lot of people at the same time can be hard.

A lot of them are rich.

Wait, a seatmate of yours really gave two free expensive sketch pads just because you asked?? Where can I find that person??

Yes they all act like my sugar daddies and my man-children in one way or another.

No, don't you dare pimp yourself out, okay? There may be a lot of people in my life but the important thing is that we all love each other.

We support, comfort, protect, and guide each other to the best we can.

No— that didn't happen in a day, I had to bend over backwards and almost die a shit-ton of times before I managed to wiggle myself firmly into the hearts of those fuckers.

...Q- Questions about our sex life will be automatically ignored.

Just.. be nice to others, even if it's seemingly stupid.

Unless they are absolute scum then just maintain distance.

You just gotta eyeball it to figure out when to stop being nice to someone.

Never and I mean NEVER treat anyone badly unless they did something unforgivable to you.

Don't call me kind. It's easier to have a grasp on other people if you're nice.

Pft— You once saw a book called "How to be a sugar baby 101" in the school library?! And you saw your principal reading it?!

Sure-sure, I'll help you with your math homework— wait a second.. Seriously?? We've been kidnapped, I ain't allowing you to do math. Where the hell did you even hide that thick-as-fuck test sheet anyways?? Up your ass?!

• • • •

You sigh for the third time this hour, looking at Yuu who's making a "Mom.. I threw up in the carpet... I'm sowwy🥺" expression as they stand beside your bed.

"What happened?"

Yuu winced, feeling embarrassed as they hear you talk to them like a disappointed parent, they had failed to appeal to Crowley about becoming a temporary student of this school and now had to be a janitor/errand kid.

"The headmaster said that I'll be the handy-man of the campus while he searches for a way to get us home..."

You feel a vein in your head throb and your eye start to twitch by of the sheer audacity being shown in front of your face.

You are now feeling the immense urge to hex that bird-bitch.

Satan sat straight in his seat, speaking out to the others in the meeting table.

"I can feel irritation and the urge to curse someone again." He said.

It would've been funny if this was another situation.

"That's definitely from MC, isn't it? You mentioned being half-asleep and feeling MC get agitated through your pact mark, right?" Diavolo asked.

"Yes, at least our pacts are still intact..." Satan nodded.

"Great, we can use this to monitor MC even if they're far away." Lucifer stated.

Countless search-parties and interrogations have already been conducted, but they're still clueless on where you can be or who could've taken you.

Even Barbatos couldn't see what had happened.

They're starting to get agitated, MC..

• • • • •

Jade watched as Azul frantically drafts and redrafts a new plan of his.

It seems that something caught the eye of their housewarden in the ceremony today.

"What could be so eye-catching that you're in such a hurry to obtain it, Azul?" Jade couldn't contain his curiosity and asked.

"It's a new student, Jade." Azul started.

"He possesses such a large amount of magical artifacts in his hands, It's unbelievable! They were all high quality too!"

Jade blinks.

"Don't you have enough magical artifacts around?"

Jade is confusion.

"You don't know it because you weren't there." Azul narrowed his eyes at Jade.

"I first thought those jewelry of his were similar to the ones that you can buy with enough money in annual auctions, but then I realized that it's very likely that those jewelry are customized."

"...How so?"

"So I decided to try and take a closer look, but when I actually got closer and almost touched one of them, I felt a strong thrum of magic that I haven't felt before!"

Oh?

Now that got Jade's attention.

Azul has been exposed to a lot of strong, powerful people and magical artifacts over the years that he and his twin were following this dormleader of theirs and yet there was actually an artifact so strong that he can feel strong waves of magic by just almost touching it?

How curious..... If the magic of the artifact was so strong, why didn't Azul sense it up until he literally almost held it in his hands?

Seems like this year won't be boring, after all..

• • • • •

BONUS: Someone has a crush.

"Brother, Your package has arrived— What are you... Are you making fan art of Mr. [L/n]...?"

Idia screams like a dumb girl in a horror movie as he tries to block the screen with his body.

"O-ORTHO?! WH-WHAT DID I SAY ABOUT KNOCKING FIRST??!"

"And... what's with the pose?"

Ortho tilts head innocently, confused on why his brother is drawing a new student in a pose that can often be seen on videos that are called "Thirst traps". he's still confused about why they're called that way.

Idia: "O- ORTHO THIS ISN'T ANYTHING BAD I SWEARAHGJSI—"

*Starts to fuckin steam*

"brOTHER YOU'RE BURNING THE CHAIR!"

"AH CRAP!"

← Pr.3 | Chapter List | Pr. 5 →

Don't forget to like, comment and reblog guys, It's a big help :3

What do y'all think of the chapter? pls respond, I need feedback🥺

I woke up today and decided to kick canon's ass.

Elae: Thanks for reading this far.☺️

See y'all next time~

Next chapter: Prologue 5

@f0urleafedcl0ver

@a-traveling-void-human

@speckle-meow-meow

@leviathans-tail-scales

@citrus-cinnamon

@prefesro

[shewhowas39]

some very important Mystra context

all right, i'm back on my forgotten realms lore bullshit again. this time about Mystra, because i see a lot of misunderstanding around her (and for good reason, there have been MULTIPLE Mystras.) but also because there's a narrative that Gale was groomed that i'd like to gently push back against.

so, very condensed history here, but the first goddess of magic was Mystryl. she was replaced by the first Mystra in like the -300s DR (BG3 takes place in 1492DR, this will come up later.) the new Mystra was goddess of magic until the Time of troubles (1358 DR, i believe), when Ao (big powerful god) got real pissy because the Dead Three stole the Tablets of Fate in order to try and take on more power. as a result, Ao forced all the gods to walk among mortals in their avatar forms. this was a huge event in forgotten realms history.

so Mystra was like "this is bullshit" and tried to go back to the heavens. Helm, serving Ao, ended up killing her to stop her from doing this.

meanwhile, there's a human mortal who calls herself Midnight who is essentially an adventurer. Midnight ended up killing Myrkul, and Ao was like "nice work, you're the new Mystra" and Midnight ascended to godhood.

when she ascended, Midnight also inherited the essences of the old Mystra AND Mystryl. (if this sounds confusing, that's because it is. forgotten realms lore gets wild.)

so Midnight, now also called Mystra, is the new goddess of magic. but in 1385DR, not even 30 years after ascending, Shar gets pissed becasue she wants to control the weave, so she tasks Cyric, another recently ascended god who used to be mortal, to go kill New Mystra. he does so, and this causes the spellplague, a 10 year long event in which a bunch of awful shit happened with magic and tons of wizards died.

but New Mystra wasn't entirely dead. her faint essence still existed. so in like 1479 DR (13 years before BG3 takes place) Elminster senses her presence. she's possessing a bear, it's all she's capable of at this time. she tasks Elminster with finding mages to be her Chosen, so that they can help her get stronger again. this is probably when Elminster was like "so i know this guy named Gale." at this point int ime, Gale would have been an adult most likely, because i think we can all agree he's in his 30s in BG3.

still, even with Elminster's help and her new Chosen, New Mystra didn't become a fully revived goddess until 1487 DR (5 years before BG3 takes place.)

and this is why the "Gale was groomed" narrative doesn't quite work for me. now, let me be clear, i'm not saying their relationship was healthy. there was an obvious power dynamic problem, and her telling him to blow himself up is objectively shitty. however, Gale would have been an adult when they met, even if he met her when she was still too weak toeven have a body beyond that of a bear.

i know there's a letter from Elminster to god Gale that says soemthing about fidning Gale as a child, but Mystra would have been essentially a wisp on the wind at this time. Elminster may have already been looking for talented wizards to help bring her back, but he dind't even have the ability to connect with her until he sensed her as a bear in 1479 DR, at which point - again - Gale was an adult.

but, moving away from that narrative, i also wanted to bring this up becuse it makes Gale's possible outcome of ascending VERY interesting, becuse the current Mystra, formerly Midnight, was also a human who ascended. however, in her case, this was bestowed on her by a very powerful god as a "reward" for killing Myrkul. (i say "reward" in quotes because it also put a target on her back with Shar and got her killed not too long after so you know....ascension ain't all that pretty.)

anyway, i thought this might be of interest to some of y'all, because reading up on Mystra lore can be confusing as hell since there have been multiple Mystras, but that context does really make her relationship with Gale way more complicated and (to me) way more interesting.

tl;dr - the Mystra that is Gale's ex is not the same Mystra who has been a god for thousands of years. she has her essence and the essence of Mystryl, the first goddess of magic, but was originally a human woman who ascended and then got murdered real bad and then came back only VERY recently thanks to Elminister.

[octuscle]

From Penthouse to Trailer Park

"And now you want to tell me what my future should look like?" Matthew rolled his eyes and looked up from his new expensive iPhone for a moment. The visit to the careers advisor was obligatory, but he thought it was completely unnecessary. His parents had sold his great-grandparents' company to a German corporation a few years ago and now devoted themselves to managing their assets and looking after their bodies. Matthew was the only son, he would inherit everything and he had no intention of ever taking up a profession. He was interested in art, maybe he would study art history in Tuscany, but that was just a hobby. And a way to hook himself a hot Italian stallion…

He continued to play with his cell phone while the man across from him asked him questions, handed him brochures and swiped on a tablet computer. Matthew was annoyed. And he didn't even think the man was hot. Someone boringly normal to die for. Someone who had to work for a living. Someone who didn't go for manicures. Boring and repulsive. "Can we cut this short and end it now? I have an appointment with my personal trainer and then I have to go to the beauty salon. Why don't you fill out your form however you like? Do I have to sign anything? To document that you've done your pathetic job? Did your career counselor actually advise you to do this? Matthew chuckled arrogantly. Chris hated narrow-minded assholes like that. But there were plenty of them here at the school. So he quickly drew up a report and handed it to Matthew so he could sign it on the display.

Matthew breathed a sigh of relief, took his sports bag, neatly packed by Consuela, and left Chris's office without a word. He was looking forward to being properly tortured by Aaron, his hot trainer, at the gym. But he had rejoiced too soon. No one was available at his gym reception and Aaron already had another client. So he would have to train alone. This day was a disaster. And it got worse. Because he had obviously got the wrong gym bag. The clothes were neither clean, nor were they his. It was probably the bag belonging to Manolo, Consuela's son. Disgusted, Matthew took the clothes out of the bag. Should he just leave now? On the other hand… It might have been quite funny. He put Manolo's clothes on. Everything was a bit big, Manolo was 20 years old. Two years older and considerably more muscular. Without a private trainer… Manolo's sweat smelled so good! This was going to be a good workout.

It was a good workout too. Even if the other members looked at him a little disparagingly. With his cheap and dirty clothes, he didn't fit in here. But that didn't matter. Matthew was here to work out. Not to put on a fashion show. After an hour and a half of hard training, Matthew remembered that he still had an appointment. Shit! No showering now. He couldn't keep his tattoo artist waiting. Matthew stroked his pumped-up upper arm. Today the lines would be joined by the shading. It was going to look hot. As he left the gym, the employee at the counter called after him that his membership fees had still not been paid. Shit, it was the end of the month. Money was tight. Everyone was like that…

So, I'm Matt, dis here’s Junior, Pete, Chuck, an’ mah lil' princess Soraya. Shit, I wuz hopin' I could only father boys. I want at least five. An’ mah ol' lady already got a new baby in her belly. Keep yer fingers crossed it’s another boy. Shit, I'm lookin' fer a job right now. But it's just like the guy at the job center said: Once ya’re 18, don’t got no high school diploma an’ no education, yer prospects suck. I mean, I can sometimes help out in Hank's garage or drive a few routes at the truckin' company. But that don't help permanent. Mah own tattoo parlor would be cool. But who’s gonna pay fer that? An’ I mean, if someone wants their name or somethin’. An’ I’m makin' a mistake. I mean, spellin' or whatever it’s called wuz never mah thing. Guys, I can only advise ya to do yer thing. Mah life is awesome! An’ look at me! I’m the hottest guy in the whole trailer park. Ya can ask any slut here.

Chris shut down his computer with satisfaction. He had had a series of successful conversations. He believed he had really helped some of the students. And with the arrogant idiots who were born with the golden spoon in their mouths, he had simply recorded what he thought they deserved. It was just a dream. But he could jerk off to the idea afterwards.

[trashcanlore]

My Chemical Marriage

The chemical wedding is an allegory used in alchemical writings to refer to the union of opposites, particularly a union that produces a new and improved product, the Rebis. 

One popular version of the allegorical wedding takes place between the Red King, the active principle (sulfur) that shapes the material and passive principle of the White Queen (mercury). However, this allegory can refer to the union of sun and moon, silver and gold, or even body and spirit. 

The Rebis refers to the end product of the magnum opus, and is typically depicted as a hermaphrodite.

The child of the chemical marriage is sometimes called the philosopher’s child and fun fact, is associated with the myth of Orion and his three fathers (Jupiter, Mercury, and Neptune). The myth is very different but I can’t help but think of the Simurgh. 

Though the chemical marriage allegory is very much referring to marriage and procreation, etc, in the context of Genshin, it’s used more to refer to a union of opposites, or a collaboration between two types of being, which will be elaborated on later. Of the four examples I will be going through, only two of these relationships have any kind of (canon) romantic associations attached to them. Basically what i’m trying to say is that this is definitely not about ships please don’t eat me.

It’s a well established trend in the history of Teyvat that there have been many god-king-like beings associated with gold or the sun, who had some kind of relationship with a knowledgeable and moon-associated woman, who then dies tragically during the god-king’s quest to Change The World. 

And now, in thematic order, I present the doomed pairings: 

Imunlaukr and the princess of Sal Vindagnyr

Imunlaukr is an outlander, destined to wield the Snow Tombed Starsilver sword to “shatter ice and snow.” The wiki cites a stanza where this name is used as a kenning for a sword. Imunlaukr tried to save Sal Vind from the catastrophic ice and snow caused by the Skyfrost Nail hitting an Irminsul tree, but he failed. Sal Vind had a princess who was also the daughter of the priestess of Vindagnyr, and was “born beneath this white tree” (Frostbearer). She is described as being “bright as the moonlight,” and had the gift of prophecy, painting her visions as frescos on the walls of the city - you can see them in the room where you find the Starsilver sword.  

Guizhong and Zhongli

According to the Stone Tablet Compilations: Vol. I, Rex Lapis descended to Liyue. This isn’t the same descending as Descenders, and it has been argued that a better translation would be ‘demoted,’ but this has similarities to the way Deshret and Remus are described as founding their kingdoms. Rex Lapis is also called Deus Auri, the Golden God, and in the Dialogue of the Desert Sages description, it says that “transformation into gold and Mora is the sole province of Deus Auri.” Guizhong’s moon connection is on the weaker end, but she is strongly associated with glaze lilies, a flower that only blooms at night, like the Nilotpala, or Lunar, lotuses. She gave Zhongli a stone dumbbell, the Memory of Dust, which contains her “wisdom.” Zhongli is still unable to unlock it, and before Guizhong’s death, she told him to forget about its contents.  On a more superficial note, Zhongli and Guizhong have a color scheme that will also be part of the pattern discussed here- black and gold and blue and white.

Remus and Sybilla

Sybilla was the former “envoy that protected the silver tree,” but she had lost her “mind and form.” However, she still retained her gift of prophecy, and told Remus about his destiny to found Remuria (and its inevitable downfall). Sybila’s loss of her physical form and mind is reminiscent of the Aranara stories about how Seelies were cursed to lose their body and intelligence if they fell in love with a human.

After making an arrangement with Remus, the silver tree that Sybilla was protecting transformed into a golden ship, which according to The History of the Decline and Fall of Remuria , was called Fortuna, and with it, Remus “descended” onto Meropis.  Together with Sybilla, Remus created Phobos, the Great/Golden Symphony. Phobos is the name of one of the moons of Mars, the red planet. Combined with the Primordial Sea-derived ichor, it would allow his people to shed their physical forms and transcend their prophesied doom. Sybilla even sacrificed her life to make the symphony possible, but she wasn’t completely dead in the end, and her lack of “persona” led to the Symphony going awry. 

And MOST IMPORTANTLY, the Golden Troupe of Remuria used a magical technique Rene called the “seal of chymical marriage,” and which I think was used to seal the Primordial Sea. Rene would later attempt to reverse its power to Evangelion-ify the people of Fontaine.

We don’t know what Remus or Sybilla actually looked like, but the color scheme of both the Remuria based artifact sets are white/blue/gold and black/blue/gold. 

Decarabian and Amos

Decarabian was the god-king and founder of Mondstadt approximately 2600 years ago. He created a wind barrier to protect his people from the storms outside (and from Andrius), and in an effort to keep his people safe, micromanaged their lives, even banning certain kinds of music that could incite rebellion (Song of Broken Pines). Interestingly, his goal to protect his people is described as a ‘dream’ multiple times in item descriptions.  The Scattered Piece of Decarabian's Dream: He tried so hard to make his dream come true, and so the fragments of that dream are still mighty.

Fragment of Decarabian’s Epic: If it were not for the song of freedom that shattered the city in an instant, Decarabian's dream would have gone on forever.  I wonder if this is meant to be another incidence of the literal power of music, like Remus’s symphony, or the Source Song.  |Decarabian had a human lover named Amos, although from her perspective, he did not understand her or her mortal love, or even the (lack of) devotion of his people. This reminds me of Scylla telling Remus that as a Usurper, he is cursed to love humanity. But maybe not understand them, which would be both of these god-kings’ downfalls.  Though Amos was human, she also seems to have had prophetic dreams: "I dreamt of ocean waves and sand, of lush forests and land." "I dreamt of boars playing in berry bushes, of a towering spire." These words she spoke to the God King in a soft tone, but they were left unheard. (Amos’ Bow) Eventually, she would join the rebellion against him, and attempt to assassinate him. Amos also fits into the blue and white color scheme, and has a feather ornament similar to Lumine in her hair: 

And we come to the piece de resistance. The ultimate example. One of the weirdest things in genshin lore (in a good way). I present:

Whatever TF is Going on With Deshret and the Goddess of Flowers

In The Lay of Al-Ahmar, Deshret is described as a “son of the sky,” with abilities that earned him the reverence of the tribes in the desert. One of his titles, Al-Ahmar, is Arabic for “the red one.” Deshret dreamed of creating a utopia for humans, and the final manifestation of that dream was the (failed) Golden Slumber, where like Remus, he attempted to separate his mind from his body. God-kings and their hiveminds…. Deshret received assistance in the form of access to forbidden knowledge from the Goddess of Flowers, also known as Nabu Malikata. The title Nabu refers to the Babylonian god of wisdom, who is associated with the planet Mercury in Babylonian astronomy. The title ‘Nabu’ has the same linguistic root as the Arabic ‘nabiyy’ (نبي) and Hebrew ‘navi’ (נביא), meaning prophet.  According to Arama, the Goddess of Flowers was a survivor of the Seelie race. After her exile, she wandered the desert, where her blood turned into streams of water that allowed gardens of water lilies to grow, which in turn birthed the Jinn. Additionally, wherever she stepped, purple flowers called Padisarahs, described as “bearing semblance to the moon,” bloomed (Flower of Paradise Lost). Together with Deshret, she founded Ay-Khanoum, meaning "[City of the] Moon Maiden.”  In addition to being known as “the red one,” Deshret is also known as the “Lord of Sand.” Combined with the Goddess of Flowers association with both water and mercury, I consider their respective titles to be a reference to Ibn Umayl’s Silvery Water and Starry Earth, a 10th century alchemical text. The ‘silvery water’ refers to mercury, or quicksilver, and the ‘starry earth’ is sulfur. This text is also referenced in the refinement materials for Dialogue of the Desert Sages, where this time the mercury-looking material is called “exalted earth.” The mercury-sulfur theory of metals was popular in medieval Islamic alchemy, and it refers to the idea that all metals are formed in the earth out of a combination of these two elements.   Like Sybilla, it’s implied the Goddess of Flowers sacrificed her life to help Deshret fulfill his goals.  Secret Keeper’s Magic Bottle: "I shall fashion you a bridge to allow you to slake your deepest wants. But you must fear not the crystalline sapphire nail..." "I will deliver you unto higher knowledge. But as I have warned, you are fated to lose much in this exchange..." "Nevertheless, hide my lesson in your heart. Remember the punishment that once was inflicted on the fallen envoys of heaven." "Know this: if there is to be hope in this world, it will be found kindling within mortals most ordinary." Wreathed in darkness, she guided her dearest friend toward the path to understanding all there was to know about the skies and the abyss. Using her body as a conduit and offering the oasis in trade, she let the dazzling radiance consume her to see his deepest desires be made manifest… It’s not clear exactly when she died, as other sources of in-game info attribute her death to the “malice of the burning sun and yellow sand,” as well as imply her death was part of a larger plan she had (Oasis Garden weapon mats). That being said, the Flower of Paradise Lost description states that after she performed this exchange, she was never seen again. As for the color scheme mentioned earlier, we don’t know what Deshret or the Goddess of Flowers looked like. Our only hints as to their human forms are the Gilded Dreams TCG card/artifact design, and a throwaway line in the Sumeru Archon Quest where Nilou says her stage costume is inspired by legends about how the Goddess of Flowers dressed.

As of 4.7, we also have the Flower of Paradise Lost TCG card, which may depicted the Goddess of Flowers. The color scheme is purple and white, but the woman in the art is wearing a dress that looks similar to Guizhongs (delulu). The crown on this card has little wings, which are reminiscent of the winged helmet Mercury is sometimes depicted as wearing. 

The defining feature of the chemical marriage is that the metaphorical union produces something greater than the sum of its parts. Sybilla and the Goddess of Flower’s sacrifices allowed the fulfillment of plans that were intended to create new worlds, something I would consider greater than the combination of god and Seelie minds. Another common thread in these transactions is wisdom, or lack thereof, with both Goddess of Flowers and Guizhong offering wisdom, and Sybilla saying that she no longer has hers - although that didn’t stop her from becoming part of Phobos. This theme of wisdom also has alchemical significance, since the philosopher’s stone is the lapis philosophorum; the 'stone of wisdom'. I’ve written a theory about the philosopher’s stone and Descenders and alchemy, including the chemical wedding motif, in the Narzissekreuz Ordo questions: you can check it out here. Two points that I want to carry over to this theory is that a) there is evidence to suggest that the philosopher’s stone and a Descender are the same in Teyvat and b) the ability to successfully change Fortuna (fate) is directly linked with Descender status.  I’m not saying that Deshret and Remus were trying to become Descenders, but there are clear thematic parallels with their goals, and Rene’s goals. Additionally, these four examples are not the only time a union resulted in world changing consequences. Records of Jueyun recounts the story of the traveler from afar and the seelie: At a far-flung moment in the distant past, the ancestor of the seelie met a traveler from afar, with whom they swore an oath of union witnessed by the three sisters of the Lunar Palace. Just thirty days later, a sudden disaster struck. The seelie and their lover fled into exile as the world collapsed around them, fleeing until the terrible calamity caught up with and seized them. Their cruel punishment was to be separated from each other for eternity and to have their memories wiped without a trace. The book goes on to directly connect this union with the curse of the Seelies that Arama mentions: The graceful but heartbroken seelie and the sisters grew more sullen and withdrawn with each passing day, to the point where their wondrous forms withered away, leaving fragments of their former selves scattered in the mountains and ruins, where they turned into tiny little life forms. They had forgotten so much, lost so much, and been stripped of their voices and wisdom, yet they continued to sing the same songs of grief. Because of this, still harboring a shred of the deep love they once had for their long-lost lover, they will act as guides to travelers who stop in the mountain mist, seeking to retrace their memories of an ancient story in long-abandoned ruins, disused makeup cabinets, and now-undecipherable poetry. Moonlight Bamboo forest has another version of the story, where the three moon sisters loved the “stars of daybreak,” and after some kind of cataclysmic event, only one (dead) moon remained in the sky. Mitternacht’s Waltz also described a sword shattering one of the moons: Two of the three bright moons that caused the perfumed sea of the primordial universe to shine and stirred up the beasts of the Arianrhod Realm were shredded by a sword that tore the horizon asunder, left in smithereens too small even for the mystical sight of the Prinzessin. Ever since the Narzissenkreuz quests, I am very suspicious of all swords mentioned in lore.  If we put all these themes and narratives together, another possible metaphorical union emerges:

Since the dawn of Genshin lore, there have been various theories regarding the duality in the designs of the twins, with some also suggesting that they are two separate halves of one being. However, I’d like to propose the opposite: if the twins follow the path of their fellow black/gold and blue/white predecessors, then it seems likely a fusion that is also a sacrifice is in the future for our protagonist.  There are other similarities between the twins and the god-king/seelie pairs. The twins have sun and moon symbolism on their clothes, constellations, and swords: Aether’s has a star (sun) shaped hilt  and Lumine’s a moon. The Traveler is frequently described as being ‘golden’ (ex. Golden Nara), and Liloupar says that they remind her of Deshret.   The Traveler is already a Descender, but they definitely don’t seem to have the strength or knowledge to exercise their world-equivalent Will yet - and maybe their sibling who has been spending time in the Abyss and has learned the “truth of this world” can help. In that case, the knowledge of the Abyss-aligned twin would fulfill the role of the Seelie knowledge in this pair, helping the Traveler complete their power-up. But what about Paimon, the emergency food? She's the dove, representing the spirit and- [is dragged offstage]. 

P.S. I didn’t know where to fit this in, but I think Before Sun and Moon is also referring to a chemical wedding. Sun -> sulfur and gold, Moon -> mercury and silver. The title could be an incomplete phrase, and actually be something like “Before Sun and Moon joined.”

[itsyagurlchip]

Slides in

Heyyy poookieeeee

I have a request for you

I receive/request: a Vox x GN!Reader who died and is in hell and got magic thing because they were into the occult when alive. Vox is “mildly” intrigued because they’re making a splash in the pride ring. (I love the magic x tech dynamic, very silly)

You receive: Likes, reblogs, shit ton of support and me blogging tf out of the request. Me going insane over the request.

☀︎⋆.ೃ࿔*:･Aw, Poor You, Go Suck It☀︎⋆.ೃ࿔*:･

ᯓᡣ𐭩warnings: 16+(!) suggestive stuff(!) valentino(!) cussing(!) badass reader(!) lots of words(!)

ᯓᡣ𐭩Ace...Ace my dear. THANK YOU SO MUCH!! AUGHH IM GONNA HAVE SO MUCH FUN WRITING THISSS AUGHHHHH-AJDKNJDEHWJDBIWXDNEHIDIWEHNDXZIM ok ok ok, since they'e only meeting there won't be too much fluff or anything really, just a simple scenario. The reader's gender wasn't specified, so go nuts! I LOVE YOU ACE/p <333

ᯓᡣ𐭩 You know how Vox acts up over people he likes? Ermm... yea, wellllll- Turns out, you're currently overselling his business AND you're hot. wait what?

Typing out documents at your desk, you sighed at the amount of paper work you had. 'Magic could do cool things, but not files' you guessed. Things around your office float around you in green magic, carrying out various tasks, like organizing said papers. 'But atleast I don't have to organize this shit.'

Suddenly, your double doors busted open, revealing a robot man? You pushed up your glasses a bit with a grimace. He marched in, electricity crackling around him as he stood up to your desk. He pounded a gloved fist onto your papers, making a brown to black singe appear on them.

You growled deeply, you just finished those!

"Did you schedule a meeting?" You said with a leveled voice. Sure you were pissed right now, but you didn't want to deal with much else this afternoon, nonetheless a petty fight with a bitch.

"No?" He said, the sparks going away in his bout of confusion. "You little- You're overselling my-" You cut him off.

"Then get. Out. Now." You flicked your wrist, with all the magic in the room dropping what it was holding, before speeding to the TV head who yelled in surprise.

"What? Fu- No!" He growled, the green magic tightening him into a stiff line, shooting him out to the room back to the elevator. He cursed profanities, the basic ones like whore and and bitch, as you rolled your eyes and shut your doors again. 'At least be creative and add the insults with flavor.'

Finally, quiet from a whining glorified crack ipad kid tablet.

"Jeez, the intolerable ass crouton." You sigh deeply, getting your anger together before getting back to work, typing and printing those papers.

ᯓᡣ𐭩

It was a week later, and nothing about the incident stayed on your mind. Infact, you were in your potion factory figuring out ways to outsell this new "love potion". Oh how you loved pissing corporate businesses off. No one even knew that you were running a "monopoly" by definition, as the CEO's of your multibusiness ran under many names.

'And those who know say nothing'. Those who were binded in contracts couldn't say anything, as they owe you from previous deals.

Your motto was; "Get the magic of a Sin, for the price of the poor". It may have been a bit deprecating, but it sells. Greatly.

Its always nice to see big man faces fall when they see that magic is often more superior in certain aspects of life. It's cheaper, more effective, and best of all; it sells more. That thought made a grin spread throughout your face. Maybe that's why you were cast into Hell; for greed. Either that or the demonic occult group you often participated in on the surface.

No matter, you were richer in this life so the past didn't concern you too much. You came into Hell not too long ago, so it became a surprise for many when you built your business in just a few weeks! You became an Overlord quickly.

With your business, and souls in your hands, you began to grow bigger in popularity! Which sparked interest in some unwanted people. It turns out, and you caught this one on the news, that the person who barged into your office was named Vox; The Innovation Overlord. And despite the "innovation" impact he's made, you still had way more clients than him by thousands.

Just as you were about to sprinkle some glitter into a bottle for a little decoration, one of your assistants rushed in with a rushed appearance, clearly shaken.

"Um, excuse me Mx. Alchemist Overlord? U-um, there's a message for you by a fellow competitor." She stuttered out, with her tail wrapping around her leg for stability. An envelope with a bright blue V was stamped with red wax. Interesting.

"From who?" You asked.

"...VoxTek Enterprises.." She cowered, as if you had something to worry about. Your smile grew, the afterlife just kept getting better!

"Thank you. You may go back to your desk now." You said with a smirk, patting her head as she walked away. You walked out of the room and into the hallway, walking towards the elevator. Strutting to your office, you closed your doors and sat down.

'Why didn't I just teleport?' You thought absentmindedly, leaning back in your chair and opening the letter. The entry read;

"Dear Alchemist..... I have a deal for you"

ᯓᡣ𐭩

You looked up at the VoxTek building. On the outside, you remained calm and leveled, with a small tinge of cockiness peeking out. On the inside, you were highly amused, and quite frankly, embarrassed for this guy. He has 2 other overlords on his side, and yet he still begs for power?

You huffed out part of a laugh, before skating your head and walking in. The place looked tacky to you. Really? The "V Tower"? This guy has to be stuck in his teenage years! It was too laughable really.

Sauntering over to the secretary, you were able to get the floor number as well as the meeting room location. Thanking her, you walked over to the elevator and pressed the highest floor.

'It seems he took my advice and scheduled a meeting.' You thought, looking up towards the camera in the corner. Oh, so the flatcreen flatass wanted to spy on you? You'll give him a show then.

You raised your head higher at the camera, lidding your eyes as slowly as you could. Taking your finger, you opened your mouth to drag it across your tongue. Pulling it away from your mouth, you let the saliva drip down onto the floor. The camera fizzled and powered down, with steam flowing from the top.

'Pathetic', you thought. And the elevator doors opened as a fluffy person in a pink robe walked in, looking tired out. A taller moth guy walked in right behind them. He was bald.

"Hello cariñe~ And what's a sexy tesoro like you doing here?" He said lowly, leaning towards you in interest. You simply ignored him as the doors closed once more.

"No answer? Ai, the feisty one aren't they Angel?" He said threateningly, talking to the other person who complied and agreed. You weren't phased. The door opened to the highest floor, signaling your leave.

"Puta." You heard him mumble, before the doors closed once I more. At least you know who Valentino is now. You scoffed before walking towards a door, with a gold label titled "Vox". This is the one for sure. Weren't one of the overlords a fashion designer? Surely they could've designed the building with more creativity.

You didn't want to touch the knob, not if that moth touched it, so you flicked your wrist as your green magic opened it for you.

Walking in, you realized you hated this building so much. The guy had sharks in tanks! In an electronic filled building. You sneered as you walked into the room rationally, not needing to make too much of a scene yet.

In front of you was the one you came here for; Vox. He had a bluescreen as his head rested on his shoulder. You snapped, and he jerked up- his face showing a loading screen.

'Oh for the love of-'

He was finally "online" with his face scrunching in confusion, before looking to you and smirking. You gestured for him to start, as you time was valuable.

"Right! So, the deal-"

"No"

"If we come toge- Wait what?"

"I said no, you glass backboard."

"Why?"

"You aren't worth my time, nor my product. Thank you for already wasting one of those." You turned to walk away before he teleported in front of you.

"B-But we can go so perfect together! Both of our businesses collaborating together!" He said, stepping towards you as he spoke. His tone was getting desperate and angry.

"So?" You said keeping your voice bold, his tone was pissing you off. It screamed "weak" and "dependent". You bet his whole enterprise could fall over if one of the "Heathers" went out of commission for a while.

"So- Partner with me! Not only would we look good together- I mean- You could have so much more sells! Imagine the cash that would flow in if the people saw magic and technology working together!" He grabbed your hands and put them together. He pushed you against the wall. "I know that magic doesn't fix all problems. Why not use technology to fill in the rest?" he was now in your face, one of his eyes swirling and enlarging. Looking at both eyes, you tched.

'Ha. Enlarging'

"You know what doesn't fix all problems? The setbacks you and your machines have." You snatched your hands back, wiping them on your coat. Flipping him on the wall, you poked his chest. "Sure, they make life easier. Whoopdy doo! But the moment the wifi turns off, it's lights out for you."

You could only hear his labored breathing. Was this motherfucker horny? You rolled your eyes and kept going.

"So who would look better? Me and my stable industry? Or you and your Lego built one?" You ran a finger down from his chest to his stomach. "All I need to do is pull. One. Piece. Out." You stepped away, walking towards the door once more. "Aw..Poor you." You frowned mockingly and looked him up and down, before laughing maliciously.

He was against the wall breathing heavily, with animated sweats rolling down his screen. Disgusting, couldn't even stay professional.

"Your business means nothing to me Vox." You said, walking through and going back to the tower entrance.

Vox was pretty sure he was hard right now.

I know you said mildly interested- but I couldn't help it! While I did want to relate Vox's dynamic with Alastor with reader's, it didn't feel too right so I took another approach!

I feel like this version of the reader has a sick love for power imbalance, and people wanting to reach the level that they're at. Despite that, they don't really care for people more powerful than them, they just mind their business on that part. Even more, reader is sex repulsed, so when they see others in their feel, they can't help but tease <3

I usually don't do time skips, so this also felt kinda odd- but I still loved writing this so much! I might actually write a fic about this. Thank you again for the request Ace <333 I hope you liked it!!

૮₍˶• .•⑅₎ა tags: @kittykittyanon @bonefanatic @oleander-nin @towomatos @thealphagirl

૮₍˶• .•⑅₎ა@ziipzeepzop-eez @wheezdostuff @spongejuice @cyb3r-st4r @matteo-hamato

@clown-froggi

if you would like to be added, check my blog. if you would like to be added, check my blog. SEE? I SAID IT TWICE!!

[brucewaynehater101]

I had a rather angst idea for a Good Dad Bruce au. One where he actually loves his kids and Jason never died (they still took Tim in because they found him taking pictures of them on patrol) and everyone is a lot healthier. The family spends time together and while they do squabble, like all families, they don't fight like they do in canon.

Then one day, they get an alert that the cave has been broken into and when they rush to check it out, they find.... Tim? Which shouldn't be possible as Tim is following behind Bruce and was literally at breakfast with everyone else. The new Tim's head snaps up when they enter and he just sighs, "Damn it, I was hoping to avoid you guys. Well, Multiversal Code Lima Omega Sigma Tango. Is that still the code here?" Which is the Bat code for "someone fucked up and sent me through a multiverse portal and now I gotta get home". Before anyone can fully comprehend what's going on with New Tim, he turns back to the Batcomputer, where he's currently pulling up information on Zatanna and Constantine.

Bruce walks over to the computer, worried about this version of his son being lost so far from home and says, "well help you get home. Do you know what world you're from?" And Tim simply raises an eyebrow and says, "oh. Is this one of *those* dimensions? How annoying. You can help by getting me some coffee, keeping Bat Brat and Hood away from me, and I'll be out of your hair soon enough. I won't even be here long enough to make your paranoia to bad if things go right."

All that is. Rather concerning. Especially because none if them have Hood in their names. Of course these Healthy Bats insist on helping New Tim out for as much as he will let them. It can be noted that he only accepts food from Alfred, Steph, and Cass and only drink from them and Dick. Anything Jason, Bruce, or Damian tries to give him is completely ignored, Tim acting like it isn't even there. He also is isn't refusing to interact with Damian and Jason but unlike the others, he won't say anything to them until they say something first.

Eventually Damian snaps and says, "Drake, why are you ignoring myself and Jason?!" Tim simply slowly places the tablet he was typing on down and turns to Damian and Jason who are a little pissed and also worried about Tim and why he's acting the way he is. After a deep breath, Tim says, "simply by observing I can tell that our families are extremely different. For example, both of you get along very well with your Tim. It is not so on my world. I will not go into details for all of our sakes, but both of you have made *multiple* attempts on my life. I don't blame either of you and things have been almost peaceful recently. I don't blame either of them, it's simply instinct for them. But that doesn't erase the fact that someone with each of your faces has nearly killed me at least 5 times *each*. I understand that it wasn't you two who did it, but I would still rather not become complacent around any version of either of you to avoid becoming complacent around them. So just. Stay away from me." Tim then turns back to what he was doing and resumes research on how to get back to his own world.

Jason is shocked and horrified that any version of himself would make any attempt on Tim's life, let alone almost half a dozen! He snarls, "what do you mean it's *instinct* for them? What, is only one person allowed to be in the family at a time or some bullshit?!"

Tim and Jason go back and forth a few times with Tim refusing to explain fully, simply calling it Instincts and everyone calling bullshit on that until Tim snaps, scales spreading across his hands and face as his pupils become slits and a hood flares out of his neck that was previously hidden. In a blink, Tim has become some kind of human animal hybrid as he hisses, "because I'm a Viper, Jason is a Hawk, and Damian is a Mongoose!! They naturally hunt my kind, I don't blame them for not trusting me or attacking me if I don't warn them that I'm there! I don't blame either of them for trying to kill me on sight the first two times each of them met because I'm a Cobra!" Once Tim settles down he pinches the bridge of his nose and deshifts back to fully human as he grumbles, "I apologize. I shouldn't have snapped like that just. Just leave it."

Jason and Damian attacking him on instinct is all a lie. They just don't want to accept Tim into the family and this is an easy way to excuse any murder attempts. If Bruce or Dick catches them, they just lie through their teeth that Thr Pit makes it harder to control the more instinct driven side of them, or its lingering effects from whatever Rouge they got Poisoned by last, or Tim was shifted and didn't warn them when he walked up. Sure it's fine for everyone else in the family, hell in 99% of the world its considered perfectly OK to be shifted at all times, or at least it is for animal hybrids like mice and birds and dogs, but not as much for Spiders, Snakes, and Pathners.

As for what the rest of Snake Tim's family is, Bruce is some kind of Fancy Dog (as was his mother) and when he's Batman he fluffy up and puts temporary dye in his fur to look like a Rottweiler or Doberman, Dick is a Swan who used basically spray on hair dye that Bruce made special for his feathers so people thought he was a Robin Shifter, Jason is a Hawk who's wings got the same treatment, Tim is a King Cobra like his mom but when on patrol he keeps the hood hidden and chews black gum so the inside of his mouth looks black like a Mamba's, and Damian is a Mongoose like Ras and Talia but the public thinks he's a ferret. Steph is either a Possum or a Raccoon and makes jokes about having switched animals with Tim as birth. Cass is a black panther who loves the groom her family.

Shifter AU!!!!!!

I was not expecting that, so I was pleasantly surprised ^^

Snake comparisons for Tim are underutilized and beloved. I'd be down to see way more of them. As for this AU, I'm curious about what seems to be Shifter-ism (not sure if there's a better word for that), their instincts, and how often Jason and Damian get away with attacking Tim. Are they at least doing better now? It seems that Tim is weary of them, that they attacked him even with full control of their actions, but that he doesn't blame them.

Also, is one of Tim's instincts to take naps in sunny spots? Is he slower when he's cold?

For the cover-up that Tim did, it was brilliant. He crafted a perfectly logical reason for why they would attack him (especially for Bats who are presumably unfamiliar with shifter instincts and thus unable to call him out).

[nebulablakemurphy]

Moves & Countermoves (Part 3)

Summary: No one ever wins the games, even fourteen years later, Y/N is still playing.

Prologue | Part 1 | Part 2

Katniss and Peeta have it out during dinner. Bickering over who has a better chance of winning. Asking to be trained separately after that. It is an odd thing to get heated about and Haymitch is intrigued.

“We’ll explore that later,” he decides as the kids leave the table.

Effie tries her hand at small talk. “Tomorrow the tributes will be assessed. How are you feeling about that? I, for one, am hopeful that we might see a victor!”

“I feel like I need a refill.” Haymitch grunts, leaning up from his seat to reach the bottle, “and I feel like you,” he looks to his wife, “need a little bit of the good stuff to take the edge off.” He dumps the contents of her glass onto the floor, replacing it with the malt liquor of his choice.

“I’m going to bed.” Y/N pushes away from the table.

“Don’t be like that, angel.” Haymitch reaches out, catching her around the waist and pulling her against his side.

Y/N smooths a hand over his hair. “It’s been a long day, I’m tired.”

Haymitch begrudgingly releases his hold. “Go.”

“Night, Effie.” The woman waves in parting.

Effie clears her throat, “goodnight.” These people are awfully temperamental.

Y/N returns to her room, making for the tablet on the nightstand. Clicking open her files for Katniss and Peeta in turn. Adding archery and strength to their lists of abilities, then moving onto weaknesses, scribbling in at the top ‘uncontrolled rage and each other?’

Y/N opens that file last; the one where she jots down kind words for the tribute’s families. How they touched her life, how they made a difference in this world and will continue to do so. With the promise that they will live on in their hearts and hers, forever.

When she was reaped, a lifetime ago, Haymitch hadn’t been warm and fuzzy. Though he’d gone to the quarter quell with her maternal aunt. Allied with her to get to the top five, even held her hand as she died, Haymitch can’t bring himself to do much more than drink himself into a stupor.

“What exactly do you want me to do, girl?”

“I want you to help us!”

He’d left Y/N and her district partner, high and dry.

“Help you?” Haymitch laughs, “I can’t help you.” He couldn’t save Maysilee then, he can’t save Y/N now. He wonders if this is still part of his punishment for the force field, cruel and unusual in it’s crafting.

Even after she wins, set up in the house beside his in victor’s village, Haymitch still won’t speak more than a few words to her. That is until the next reaping rolls around.

“Aren’t you coming with me?” Y/N asks.

Back to the Capitol, back to hell.

“Think I’m gonna sit this one out. You’re due to take one for the team, right? I was a shit mentor anyhow. Not you though, you’ll be good.”

She isn’t good. All of sixteen marching a couple of thirteen year olds to their final resting place. Y/N is inconsolable upon her return, mailing letters to the families of the fallen tributes from twelve and shutting out the world.

Her mother, who’s struggled with a morphling addiction most of Y/N’s life, is worse now. Her father, the mayor, makes his best efforts to shield his daughters from it. They do what they can to support Y/N through her victory and the transition to her new life, all to no avail.

In the end there is only one person Y/N wants to comfort her, the only one who understands. She has a new respect for Haymitch after that. There is no pain in the world like this.

It takes three years, three years before she marches up to his door on reaping day and pounds against it, hard. “You’re coming with me.” Gone is the child she was, a woman standing in her place.

“And why would I do that?” Haymitch smirks, leaning heavily against the door frame.

“Because I need you.”

Slowly, they became friends. Haymitch was happy to be whatever, whatever she needed him to be.

She folds the tablet back in it’s case, feeling tears prickle at the back of her eyes. Crying is useless, she learned that sometime ago. Not a single outcome changed or a life saved with tears. Only knowledge and fact driven perseverance can do that. Yet she is more man than machine and sometimes sadness wins.

The door of their suite hums to life. Y/N tries, in vain, to hide the evidence; her moment of weakness.

“You know, you,” Haymitch stumbles in, pointing a finger at her, “have become highly predictable.” Going to bed with him or after him is the norm. Means she’s fine, maybe not great, but she’ll tough it out. Going to bed before him is nothing short of a cry for help. She’s reached her limit. Haymitch knew she was getting there, that’s why he offered the drink.

Y/N heaves in a breath, “don’t say I told you so.”

“Fine, but I did tell you so,” he frowns. For all his flaws, Haymitch does love her and hates that she’s in pain.

She opens her hand to accept the little blue pill in his palm, it’ll put her out for a few hours of much needed sleep. Y/N swallows it dry, forcing it down her throat.

“Lie down,” Haymitch jerks his chin toward the pillows. Pulling back the covers to tuck her in, his wife’s eyelids already heavy.

She babbles out a bit of nonsense, her tongue like lead. Not heeding her command.

“We can argue all day tomorrow.” He promises, soothing her to sleep with her hand in his. Peppering kisses to her knuckles as she loosens her grip. “Sweet dreams.”

————————————————————————

“So besides the bow, what else can you do?” Y/N asks Katniss, prepared to take notes.

“Might help if you look at me.”

“Hmm?” The woman snaps her head up.

“If you’re analyzing me for the next kids, it might help to look up every now and again.”

“I wasn’t-”

“You were.” Katniss cuts her off, with finality. “We’re all numbers to you anyway.”

Y/N offers a smile as she sets the tablet down. “You want my attention, you have it.”

“Don’t talk to me that way.”

“What way?”

“Like I’m a child,” Katniss furrows her brow.

“You are a child,” Y/N retorts. “I know you don’t want to be here and all that anger has to go somewhere.” She pushes off the training room bench and onto the mats. “Show me what you can do.”

The brunette charges her mentor, prepared to tackle her to the ground; only Y/N moves at the last second. Leaving Katniss face down on the ground. This only fuels her fire, she grabs Y/N’s ankle, tugging her off balance.

They carry on like this for a long while, ending with the pair covered in sweat, sprawled out on the mats.

“How can you do this?” Send kids off every year to fight and die. “You’re a mother.”

“I do this because I’m a mother,” Y/N whispers. “You’re not numbers to me, Katniss. You’re people. Who deserve to be treated with love and compassion, given access to every shred of useful information I have. That’s why I document everything. So I never forget.”

Katniss sees her then, as if for the first time.

Peeta finds them. “It’s time to switch,” he says.

Haymitch is waiting to help Katniss prep for the interviews and Peeta will now be…doing whatever this is.

Katniss musters the strength to drag herself away, glancing back at Y/N from the door. “Put that in my notes. Tell my sister I fought.”

————————————————————————

“As you know, the tributes are rated on a scale of one to twelve, after three days of careful evaluation.” Caesar narrates from the television.

Effie, Portia, Cinna, Peeta and Katniss have all joined the victors on the pristine white settee. Y/N slides forward to the edge, while Haymitch sinks back into the cushions. Feeling the familiar squeeze and release of her fingers against his knee as the results are displayed.

District twelve is last, the anticipation rises like bile in Y/N’s throat. The careers score nines and tens, the others a mix of fives through eights. Thresh, of district eleven pulled a nine, his partner Rue follows with a seven. Best of luck, sweet girl.

“From district twelve, Peeta Mellark; with a score of…eight.”

Portia gasps in delight, “Peeta!”

“Excellent.”

“An eight.” Y/N bumps his shoulder.

“We can work with that.”

“Bravo.”

Peeta smiles, relaxing marginally at the news.

“And finally, from district twelve, Katniss Everdeen; with a score of…eleven.”

“Eleven?!”

“I thought they hated me.” After she shot at their pig and all.

“They must have liked your guts.”

Cinna raises a toast. “To Katniss Everdeen, the girl on fire!”

Part 4

Series Taglist: @praline357 @flowercrowns-goodvibes @justheretoparty420 @avocadotoastwithegg @officialjellydoughnut @whoreforfictionalpeople @treehouse-mouse @emo-markie @spilled-mi1k