#okay did i freaking forget anyone else

[pomefioredove]

Hi! I love your writing style, especially how you portrait Rook, it's just how I imagine him💜

Could I request for Rook, Vil, Floyd and Azul reacting to reader calling them "love" or something affectionate for the first time? Maybe with reader realising and imploding on the inside?

Of course no pressure, I eat anything you write anyway!

-🔥

GUYS THESE PROMPTS. and thank you so much <3 I like thinking I do a good job 😭

summary: accidentally calling them "love" type of post: headcanons characters: floyd, azul, rook, vil additional info: romantic, reader is gender neutral, reader is not specified to be yuu, fluff!

𝐅𝐥𝐨𝐲𝐝 𝐋𝐞𝐞𝐜𝐡

it's a quick slip of the tongue, one he might not have even noticed if he was distracted by anything else

unfortunately, today it's you that's caught his attention, and so he hears and processes every honeyed word with startling accuracy

"Could you pass me that pencil, love?"

wait. that's not what you'd said in your mind

the embarrassment is immediate, and you would have apologized if not for the big grin on his face

he goes on to brag about it to everyone for the rest of the day

...or week

however long it takes for that fuzzy feeling to wear off him

of course, at that point, he'll find you and pester you until you say it again for him

you never did get that pencil.

𝐀𝐳𝐮𝐥 𝐀𝐬𝐡𝐞𝐧𝐠𝐫𝐨𝐭𝐭𝐨

perhaps your unfortunate habit of verbalizing your subconscious thoughts has finally come around to punish you

you're in Azul's office at the lounge, and he's explaining something about budgeting

you don't... quite understand, but he seems pretty pleased with himself, so you're happy for him

"I'm so proud of you, love,"

congratulations, you broke him

he forgets everything he said and everything he was about to say

and he just stares

his face burns a bright shade of red, and for a moment he looks around the room as if he's searching for somewhere to hide

you feel bad right away, and make an attempt to explain and apologize, though your own embarrassment makes everything you say unintelligible and even more embarrassing

after a moment of watching you stammer he just shushes you

"I appreciate the compliment. Just give me a warning next time... there will be a next time, won't there?"

𝐑𝐨𝐨𝐤 𝐇𝐮𝐧𝐭

intentional or not, he's been waiting for this moment

it's late, you're tired; Rook had been dragging you around campus all day, showing you his favorite "people-watching" spots

by the time he walks you back to Ramshackle, you're happy, but completely drained

(being around Rook tends to do that)

you're too sleepy to even realize the words coming out of your mouth until it's too late

"Thank you again. Good night, love,"

his reaction is immediate

he launches into a very long soliloquy about his feelings towards you, what a wonderful day it was, and how he treasures your relationship no matter how you define it

already has some petnames of his own for you ready to go

amour, chou chou, chéri, miel, cœur...

prepare to never hear the end of this

𝐕𝐢𝐥 𝐒𝐜𝐡𝐨𝐞𝐧𝐡𝐞𝐢𝐭

Vil is actually quite used to being called all sorts of lovely things

...albeit, mostly by his fans

and if it were anyone else calling him their love, he wouldn't have even noticed

but hearing it in your voice immediately catches his attention

the sentence is so simple, of course you would've missed it. he'd simply been giving you some advice, and...

"Okay. Thank you, love,"

he would have teased you for it (lovingly, of course) if not for the fact that it made him feel flustered

him. flustered!

he stares at you until you realize what exactly you'd just said to him, and then, understandably, you freak out

trying to backtrack won't help, neither does trying to explain, or apologizing

after a moment of letting you struggle, Vil just laughs

"My, my. Don't worry yourself, I take it as a compliment. But we'll have to work on your confidence some more, won't we?"

[ddejavvu]

can i request spencer reid w bau!reader and their married but reader forgets to put her wedding ring back on and derek’s asking spencer about what happened/if theyre having marital problems and spencer starts panciking but she just forgot about it in her pocket😭

Derek's brow is knitted in real, authentic concern when he corners Spencer in the BAU's kitchenette, and it turns Spencer's stomach. Usually, Derek has a teasing glimmer in his eyes, but it's scarily absent today, and he braces a large hand on Spencer's lanky bicep.

"Pretty boy," Derek starts, and his tone is soft, soothing, kind, "Anything you wanna talk about? I'm here if you need me, y'know."

Spencer tries feigning calm, which is terribly hard to do as someone who's fraught with nerves constantly, but he keeps an even tone when he speaks.

"I don't think so. Should I want to talk about something?"

Derek smiles sympathetically, almost a grimace, and Spencer feels a flash of fear run through him. Has Derek heard something about his mom?

"I don't think anyone else has noticed yet," Derek assures Spencer, "But I saw Y/N's not wearing her ring."

It's not what he'd been expecting, dreading, but it's not pleasant either. Spencer's eyes dart hurriedly to your hunched form, shoulders bent and crowding your desk as you devote yourself entirely to your paperwork. Sure enough, your wedding ring is absent from your finger, leaving an uncomfortably blank space on your skin, and Spencer's brows knit together.

"I didn't know," Spencer admits, keeping his voice to a low murmur, "I- But- we aren't having any problems. I don't think."

Derek shoots that awful pitying grimace his way again, and Spencer shakes his head, his stringy hair flying.

"No, no- we're not- we're not having problems," He asserts, but he's not sure if he's trying to convince himself or Derek more, "I mean, we bickered about coffee this morning, but not- not marriage problems bad. She just forgot it."

Spencer knows what expression will be on Derek's face if he looks, so he doesn't. He busies himself with stirring the rest of the sugar into his coffee, excusing himself before Derek can press the issue even further.

On his way out of the kitchenette he snags a donut from an open box on the counter, slipping a napkin beneath it and trying not to rush to your desk. He doesn't want to seem obvious, but he's a flaming bundle of nerves.

"Angel," He gets right to the point, placing the donut beside your hand on the desk and leaning over the back of your chair. He nestles his cheek to yours, pressing his lips against the curve of your jaw and blocking your conversation from view of the bullpen with the way he shrouds you from behind.

"Spence," You begin, alarmed at the sudden ambush of sugar, both literally and figuratively, "What-?"

"Are you mad at me?" He asks, sounding rather like a child worrying to their parents. You're only more confused after his question, and you tentatively shake your head.

"No? Should I be?"

"I don't think so," Spencer hums, "But you're not wearing your ring."

You blink, glancing at your bare ring finger.

"Oh!" You gush, your shoulders pressing back against his own as you maneuver your hand into your pocket. It's difficult sitting down, but you retrieve the ring and jam it back onto your finger, "I took it off earlier because I was taking the trash out. I didn't want it to get all goopy, and I guess I just forgot it was in there." You let your explanation hang in the air for a moment, but your eyes flash with sympathy, remembering Spencer's initial question, "Oh, Spence, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to freak you out."

"It's okay," He breathes out a shaky sigh of relief, reluctant to straighten up from where he's hugging you from behind, "You didn't even freak me out. Morgan did."

You laugh, and the sound soothes those frayed nerves in his chest, the ones that had lit with sparks of panic at Morgan's pity, "Well, don't listen to Morgan from now on. However," You reach for the donut, tearing it in half and holding one end out to Spencer while you catch the other between your teeth, "If it means I get donuts in apology, maybe I'll forget my wedding ring in my pocket more often."

[moonstruckme]

hiii! congrats on 7k and thank you for all sharing all of your lovely work with the world!

Could i request apple pie 🥧 for remus and prompt #13 please!

and happy birthday hun!!! 💛

Thank you angel <3

¹³⁾ frozen peas pressed against a fresh bruise

cw: modern au, jokes about violence

Remus Lupin x fem!reader ♡ 521 words

You work hard not to make a sound as Remus presses the bag of frozen peas to your face, but the pain makes itself known in the purse of your lips. 

“Sorry, darling,” he murmurs, frowning. 

“It’s okay.” You try to smile at him. You’d shed a few tears right when it happened, more borne from panic than anything else, and your poor boyfriend had looked so distraught. You’re trying to make up for it now. “It doesn’t really hurt anymore.” 

Remus huffs like he knows you’re lying. “I’m going to kill James.” 

“It was an accident,” you remind him.

“I heard my name,” James calls from the living room. “Y/n, what’s he saying about me? Should I go?” 

“Probably, if you want your moneymaker intact,” you hear Sirius reply at the same time as you call back, “No. Stay, James, it’s fine.” 

“It is not fine,” Remus mutters. He lifts the peas just a bit to see underneath, as if the injury might not still be there. When it is, he harrumphs (some would say rather dramatically). 

Really, you should have known better than to get out Just Dance while James was around. It’s fine when he wants to play at his house, but you and Remus’ apartment is too small for the excess of movement James Potter produces whilst in the zone. You’d been stepping behind him to bring Remus a drink when James’ elbow had come back hard, catching you just underneath your eye. 

James has apologized a dozen times, even offered to go to the store to get you some fancy bruise cream he likes, but none of that is good enough for your boyfriend. You doubt Remus will be satisfied until you agree to sock James in the jaw as recompense. 

Unfortunately, everyone besides you is on board with this plan. 

“Look, dollface, I’ve got him all ready for you.” When you come back into the living room, frozen peas still covering your eye, Sirius has his arms looped through James’ and is holding his best friend in front of him like your own personal dummy. 

James puffs his chest out. “I know I need to atone.” He shuts his eyes, turning his face to the side. “You can hit me in the same spot if you want to, just try not to break anything, please.” 

You laugh, but Remus replies before you can. “She can break whatever she likes,” he says drily. 

“Seems only fair,” Sirius agrees. “You did hit the girl in the eye.” 

“Hold on,” you say, forgetting for a moment about freeing James, “what does me being a girl have to do with anything?” 

“Yeah,” seconds James, “I can hit her just as much as I can hit a man.”

“Well, we’re not advocating for hitting anyone.” 

“Right, yeah. I just mean it’d be equal.” 

“You want to hit people?” Sirius pretends to be aghast. “Y/n, punch this sick freak before I do it myself.” 

“I mean,” Remus shrugs, stepping forward, “if anyone can do it…” 

You grab your boyfriend around the waist before he can do any real damage.

[steddieas-shegoes]

He’s not sure why he even comes to these parties anymore. He used to sell at the frat houses, made his rounds until he was out of product, made more money than any minimum wage job he could find near campus.

But he hasn’t in a while. Months, at this point.

It’s just that every time he came to one of these idiotic showing of riches and popularity, the most beautiful man he’d ever seen was sitting in the corner of the kitchen watching with a faraway look in his eyes. Sometimes he stood in a group of people in the living room, but never contributed to the conversation. Once, Eddie saw him swinging his feet back and forth in the water of the hot tub on the back patio with three different couples making out inside it, completely zoned out.

Eddie needs to keep an eye on him. Hence, he attends the stupid parties.

And it’s stupid, to go through so much trouble for a guy he doesn’t even know, who probably doesn’t even notice him back. It’s stupid, but Eddie’s never claimed to be very bright.

Which is probably why he walks up to the guy when he’s about two seconds from punching Tommy Hagan, grabs his wrists, and tugs.

“The fuck are you?” He asks Eddie, reasonably confused and angry at being interrupted by a stranger.

Eddie could feel his pulse against his fingers, swore he could feel a spark of electricity flow between them.

“Eddie. Just leave him. Whatever he did isn’t worth it,” he said through clenched teeth.

His fingers tightened around Steve’s wrists as he considered trying to pick him up, throw him over his shoulder, and walk out of this party entirely.

“How the hell do you know?” Steve wasn’t trying to pull away.

Eddie didn’t let himself think about that too much.

“I just know nothing Hagan does is ever worth trouble for you. C’mon,” Eddie tugged on his wrists again, and this time, it seemed to catch the guy off guard.

“Didn’t know you were into freaks, Harrington,” Tommy said as they took a few steps away from him. “If you’re gonna be gay, you could at least have taste.”

Eddie froze.

The guy, Harrington, tried to pull his wrists loose, but Eddie didn’t let him.

He turned to Tommy, the guy who almost got him arrested for selling at his party only a few months ago, and smirked.

If he was gonna out someone to a stranger, Eddie had no problem doing the same right now.

“And you just sucked my dick because you wanted to add it to your résumé?” Eddie grinned at Tommy, who quickly looked around to make sure no one else heard.

“As if I would-“ he tried to say, but Harrington cut him off.

“You forget you say shit when you’re high. You told me about it already. I think your exact words were, ‘he had the best dick I’ve ever seen, Steve.’ Or am I mixing that up with another dick?” Steve pulled one arm loose from Eddie’s grip, brushed hair from his face, and let it relax at his side.

Eddie could let go now, he was sure if anyone would start something at this point it would be Tommy. But Steve wasn’t trying to pull his other wrist loose and Eddie liked the warmth of him in his hand.

“Whatever man, just go. You don’t even wanna be here,” Tommy turned and left before Steve could respond.

Eddie finally let go, but he didn’t like the immediate sense of loss that filled his chest.

“You always interrupt strangers before they fight?” Steve asked him, hands shoved into his pockets.

Eddie really looked at him, inspected him. He only ever saw him at these parties, so the lighting was shit, but he’d noticed the dark shadows under his eyes a while ago. He noticed that he held himself in a way that showed he was always ready for a fight. Steve’s hair had gone flat over the last month or so, not nearly as voluminous or shiny as it had been at the start of the year.

“Are you okay?” He asked instead of answering the question.

“I’m fine, dude.”

Eddie shook his head. “You don’t seem okay.”

“Then why did you ask?”

“Just seems like something is bothering you,” Eddie wouldn’t push more, not if Steve was actually gonna get mad. But something told him that nobody pushed Steve to talk enough.

Eddie had Wayne back home, and his friends in his band here, and a couple coworkers at the bar he worked at twice a week now that he could joke around with. Steve didn’t even seem to have the people he hung around with.

“Why does it matter to you if something is bothering me?”

That’s a fair question. Why does it matter to him?

“Maybe because I just wanted to help. That’s what people do, right?”

“Not for me, usually.”

Eddie stepped closer, barely leaving space between them. “Well, I am.”

Steve stared back at him, shoulders dropping and eyes losing that angry fire.

“Why?”

Eddie was an idiot sometimes, but he was able to read people pretty well. It’s what kept him safe for most of middle and high school, and made him friends in college.

He knew what it looked like to be lonely and depressed, and Steve had check marks next to both of those.

“You wanna get out of here?” Eddie asked, once again avoiding his question.

“And go where?”

“I’ll show you my favorite getting high spot.”

“I don’t really smoke with strangers,” Steve seemed nervous.

“You don’t have to smoke. I’m just gonna show you the place.”

He watched Steve think about it, noting the way his brows scrunched together, how he bit his bottom lip, how he looked at the ground instead of at Eddie.

“Fine. But if you murder me in the woods, my mom will have you hanged,” Steve finally said.

“Hanged? Do they even do that anymore?”

Steve giggled. “Probably not. But she’d find a way.”

“Well, I’ve got no interest in murdering you, big boy.”

The blush that filled Steve’s cheeks was stunning. A perfect pink dusting his skin, giving him a healthier glow than what he’d had for a while.

“What do you have interest in?”

Eddie could say any number of things to flirt, make his true intentions clear, maybe even go straight back to his single dorm instead of showing Steve anywhere.

But Eddie figured that’s all Steve was used to, or maybe he was always the one who had to put an effort into things.

Maybe he wasn’t used to getting treated like a human being.

“I’d like to get to know you. Parties like this aren’t really a good place to learn about someone’s favorite song or what they snack on when they wake up in the middle of the night.”

Steve seemed shocked by this answer, but his features quickly melted into a soft smile, one Eddie would want to see every single day.

“Fine. But it’s not a date,” Steve held out his hand, ready to be led.

Instead of lacing his fingers with Steve’s, or even just grabbing his hand in his palm, he wrapped his fingers around Steve’s wrist again.

“We’ll see.”

———

On graduation day, Steve and Eddie found their way back to their spot, one they’d probably never visit again.

Eddie’s fingers were curled around Steve’s wrist as they stood facing each other, close enough to feel each other’s breaths against their lips.

Nearly two years together, nearly 300 trips to this spot, and more than 500 dates that they never called dates.

And it was just the beginning.

Eddie leaned in to press his lips to Steve’s gently, keeping it soft so they wouldn’t get carried away.

They had to meet Wayne at the Italian restaurant in less than an hour and then Steve’s mom expected them back at Steve’s apartment for a wine and dessert celebration.

They wouldn’t be properly alone like this again for at least a couple days, but they didn’t have time to do much about it right now.

“I love you,” Eddie whispered as he rested his forehead against Steve’s.

“I love you, too,” Steve said back.

He didn’t have dark shadows under his eyes anymore, spending more nights sleeping in bed with Eddie than awake at parties he didn’t want to be at. His hair had most of its shine back. He’d put on a few pounds after joining the gym again, using it as an outlet for stress instead of hiding in corners at parties where he would drink just enough to get buzzed four times a week.

He made friends with Eddie’s friends, plus some of his own when he got a part time job at the coffee shop on campus.

Steve never spoke to Tommy again, at least as far as Eddie knew. He didn’t seem interested in being his friend again, and once he told Eddie more about their “friendship”, he couldn’t really blame him.

“You ready to go see Wayne?” Steve asked him, probably more excited than even Eddie was.

Wayne and Steve bonded quickly and they’d probably spend most of the lunch talking about sports and where they would go fishing this summer.

Eddie nodded, but he pulled something from his pocket before Steve could pull away and start walking back to the car they now shared.

“What’s that?” Steve asked, pointing towards the envelope in Eddie’s hand.

“It’s a gift from me to you. Well, I guess both of us, but I really got it for you.”

He handed it to Steve, who opened it quickly.

He pulled out the paper inside and Eddie watched his eyes fly across the words written there.

“Eddie.”

“Stevie.”

“You got us a trip to Italy? How the fuck did you get us a trip to Italy?” Steve was looking at him, eyes wet with tears.

“Doesn’t matter how. Wayne gave us some money for it, so did your mom. I’ve been saving for a year. Want us to have something special before we have to start working.” Eddie kissed his forehead. “Plus I want any excuse to see you in some of those see-through linen shorts.”

Steve’s lips were on his, his arms wrapped around Eddie’s neck. Eddie wrapped his arms around his waist to hold him there.

“I’ll wear them every day,” he gasped as he leaned in for another kiss.

Eddie laughed. “You won’t hear any complaints from me, sugar.”

“I can’t believe you did this. All I got you was a t-shirt.”

“You know I love t-shirts. I know you love Italy. It’s a win-win for both of us.”

Steve rolled his eyes, but kissed him again.

His eyes widened. “Oh my god. Are you gonna propose in Italy?”

Eddie snorted. “Why would I answer that question?”

“Because! I have to know!”

“Why?”

“So I can make sure I have a nice outfit for pictures, dumbass.”

“You’ll just have to wait and see. You look good in everything,” Eddie kissed the top of his head before he wrapped his fingers around Steve’s wrist and tugged on it once. “Let’s get to Wayne before he sends a search party.”

Eddie smiled to himself as they walked to the car, Steve’s rambling about what he wanted to do in Italy keeping his mind from wandering too far. He couldn’t help thinking about the ring he had stashed away in his guitar case, though.

Italy was the perfect place to propose.

[thevoidstaredback]

Tim was curious. Maybe a little addicted to whatever the hell was in that coffee, he's still standing by the point that no other coffee will ever be enough, but that's not the point.

He wants answers. The Justice League want answers. No one has been able to get them. Because Phantom stays in the House of Mysteries, no one but the JLD can actually get time him. The Supers have tried listening out for him, but magic is something they're weak against and therefore can't hear through. Batman has tried to get into the House, but he's been sent everywhere else for his attempts. They would track him down as a civilian, but no one actually knows if he has a civilian disguise. It's very hard to hide hair that starkly white and skin pale enough to be blue.

Regardless, everyone wanted answers and Tim was determined to be the one to get them. Why does Phantom claim to be thirty-eight, fourteen, and eighteen all at the same time? Where did he come from? When did he die? How did he die? What the hell is in his coffee because damn was it good!

Off topic.

Tim had the rest of the Titans return to the tower while he stayed out. It'd be easier to track if he was the only one doing it. Besides, these guys work with Raven, they won't hurt him. Probably.

The fact that Phantom apparently smelled like death was another concern Tim had. Was it because he was dead? And what did Constantine mean that 'the smell lingers'?

More questions kept popping up like goddamn daisies, and there was no answers to clip them down. Tim was getting frustrated, to say the least.

***

Danny made an effort to at least try and help Constantine with the demon problem the building was having. Honestly, it wasn't even that bad, in Danny's humble opinion. The demon was just messing with people, not hurting anyone or stealing anything! He was, at most, planting minor inconveniences everywhere.

That's not technically his monkey, though, and it was most definitely not his circus. He figured he'd offer to be helpful, though, if only so that Constantine would owe him a favor. A favor he already knows how he's going to cash in.

"Why'd you really want to tag along?" Constantine asked Danny while they searched for the demon.

"What do you mean? You offered to bring me along."

"Yeah, but that's because you need to get out of the House more."

"Funny, coming from you."

"I spend more time outside of the House than I do inside." the Brit scoffed, "Now tell me why you agreed to come along. This is demon hunting. You only ever go ghost hunting."

Danny sighed and ran his left hand through his hair. Not that he could feel it, stupid nerve damage. "Deadman's been on my ass about my first trip to Gotham. I would've left to go find some place to crash, but the entire Justice League is also on my ass for some reason! I'd honestly rather not have to face any of them."

"You've been to Gotham?" Constantine asked, "When?"

Danny groaned, "Not you, too!"

"Whoa, okay, okay. You don't need to share with the class."

"Sorry."

"You better be."

"Hey!"

"Now tell my why the JL proper are after you?"

A sigh. "You remember at that meeting when Red Robin mistook my drink for his?"

"Yeah. Hard to forget. You freaked everyone out a little bit."

"Yeah. Turns out they all have questions that I don't want to answer. Avoiding them all has been the best way to not answer."

"You know you can't dodge them all forever."

"I know, but I really don't want to have to explain anything!" he whined, "The questions that they'll end up asking are gonna be really painful to answer."

A raised eyebrow. "How do you know what they'll ask?"

"Because everyone always asks the same things. Worded differently, but still that same."

"Then refuse to answer."

Danny met Constantine's eyes with a deadpan glare. "You're gonna look me in the eye and tell me that the Justice League and their sidekicks will leave me alone if I tell them 'no'?" He shook his head. "Lying's a bad habit, old man."

Constantine rolled his eyes as he went for his lighter, remembering they were were in a no smoke zone and retracting his hand. "Don't sass me, brat. Wonder Woman and Superman, at the very least, would back off. They'd get everyone else to, too."

"What about Batman and his brood?"

"Touche." the man said, "But you can't hide from them forever."

"I can try,"

"But you'll fail."

Another groan. "Can we just get this thing over with? I want to lock myself in the basement and wallow."

Part 5 Part 7

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[scarrletmoon]

okay i know the Discourse™️ has been going on for way too long at this point, but

i think some people outside of the OFMD fandom don’t actually get why we’re particularly annoying about this show

OFMD is not the first queer show to ever exist. if anything, it's a late entry in decades of queer media. over a year and a half since the first few episodes aired, everyone knows that OFMD is queer. that doesn't make it particularly special

but back in March? this is the trailer that dropped in February of 2022, 2 weeks before the premier. if you're used to seeing queer chemistry in shows that aren't intended to be queer, you might see the hints between Ed and Stede here. but to most people? it's just a silly little pirate comedy. just guys being dudes. the trailer doesn't even hint at the other 2 canonical queer relationships in the show -- the closest it gets suggesting romance is the music and the pink in the poster

so when people watched this show in March 2022, they went into it expecting subtext and nothing else. to them, it was like watching Sherlock or Supernatural or Merlin in the 2010s. if you were in any of those fandoms -- especially Sherlock and Supernatural -- you know what it was like; constant jokes at our expense, being mocked for creating explicit fanwork, made fun of by the creators and within the show itself. if we saw queer subtext, that was our problem. this was a time when you pretended NOT to be in fandom, for fear of ridicule. we kept our fanwork to ourselves, we DID NOT share it with the cast, and we accepted that our favourite ships would probably never be canon. maybe one day, if we were lucky, we'd have a show where the subtext wasn't mockery as much as deliberate foreshadowing -- but that had to be YEARS away

right?

OFMD was never billed as a queer show, not in the beginning. there was no LGBTQ+ tag on (HBO) Max, it wasn't on anyone's list of upcoming queer shows in 2022, it flew under the radar through most of its first season. this was a show about pirates, and sure, some of them were queer. but not the LEADS. if you think they're romantically involved, that's must be fandom brain poisoning

except the 9th episode aired, and they kissed. and the show said "you're not crazy for thinking they have chemistry because they really do. it's been a romance this whole time". and in the 10th episode, Stede realizes that he's in love

(not mandating you watch this clip if you don't care for the show, but there's something that feels particularly earth shattering about no one saying the word gay but knowing that Stede's realizing he is, that it's completely unambiguous and explicit in a way that only straight romances are usually allowed to be)

this is why people freaked out about this show. no one knew. even the creator, David Jenkins, was surprised when WE were surprised that it was gay for real -- he set out to write a love story, using all the tried and true beats of a rom com. he'd never even heard of the term queerbaiting. he looked at historical Blackbeard and Stede Bonnet and thought "oh, there's something here" and just...wrote that, with very little fanfare, like it was inevitable. like it was obvious. of course Jim and Pam end up together. of course Buttercup and Westley end up together. what kind of disappointing ending would it be if You've Got Mail ended with the main characters just going their separate ways?

so of course Ed and Stede are in love

look, i get it. we're annoying and won't shut the fuck up about this show that seems mediocre at best. i watched the whole thing back in march, thought "huh, that was cool" and was sure that i'd forget about it in a few days

an hour after looking at fanart on twitter, i was lost in the fucking sauce

there's just so much to unpack from a mere 10 episodes. it covers racism, toxic masculinity, gender expression, sexuality, trauma and abuse. and i don't think we should overlook the fact that the non-white characters in this show get to be fully human in a way i haven't seen in my favourite shows in recent memory

additionally, most OFMD are 25 or older. we're not people who've been spoiled by queer rep, who don't get how hard it used to be, how you'd have to grovel for scraps, how shipping and fanfiction was a way to find queer rep where we thought there never would be. we've been here. we're annoying about this show because for a lot of us, it's the first time we've been treated like our queerness isn't an anomaly that needs to be relegated to its own section, that needs to be praised for the bare minimum of acknowledging that we exist. it's not pulling punches to avoid scaring away a straight audience. it just is.

OFMD for me is like when i watched Black Panther for the first time and realized that this is what white people felt all the time. have there been other black superhero movies? of course! does Disney fucking suck? BOY does it. but that was the first time i got to sit in a movie theater and watch a mainstream film that looked at Africa and said "look at how beautiful you are, exactly as you are"

and idk. i think that's really cool

[celeste444spacey]

Why be private and why celebrities chose to be private

thanks to kpop anon for the beautiful post rec

Hello loves, i know we are here and we are manifesting that fame and all that shit. The fame and noticeability is certain. Is the way you can handle it certain too?

We all know branding is so freaking important, not just as a person but as a celebrity??? You HIRE people for it. It's undeniable at this point that socials are practically key promoter of brand for famous people. But in the era of oversharing and overposting, even the most A-list of celebrities can quickly lose their allure. Plus, it's not cute if your whole life is on show just for everyone to know.

I will be the first to say (don't quote me), the statement "if it's not on social media, it didn't happen" is not true.

WHY?

Literally each and every thought of a person lately is somewhere on social media. And it's kind of bad. Cause like where's the mystery of an individual now??? And people are forgetting about digital footprint (god knows some of y'all need to remember it exists).

WHY WOULD A CELEBRITY CHOSE TO BE PRIVATE

Simple. It's not anyone else's business.

Why the fuck would Beyonce want the world to know that she had eggs for breakfast? Or that Blue Ivy did something funny? It's not the public's business.

That adds to the allure of Beyonce as well. Why do you think she's the celebrity for celebrities??? Let me explain with the word

UNATTAINABILITY

That woman is not available to just anyone. She doesn't go to every party there is, isn't posting all the freaking time, not letting us know every move she makes; just the ones we need to know.

And that adds to her charm. Humans like unattainability. Mystery draws people in. Proof? Why do you get excited when someone is telling you a secret? Nobody else knows it, so you feel exclusive. The exclusivity makes you feel connected and stuff, and humans crave connection.

And where do you get that connection with Bey? Through her music. That's where relatability comes in. Her feelings, her raw emotions, her struggles and her vulnerability.

WHY RELATABILITY AFTER A CERTAIN POINT LOSES ITS CHARM

Fans love relatable celebrities. But there should also be a line to that. Why? after a certain point, it's pretentious

Yes okay you binge watched that show and reacted the same way to the plot twists like other people. But you don't have to constantly remind us that you do embarassing things like normal people. YES WE GET IT YOU'RE HUMAN AND JUST LIKE US- wait but you're NOT JUST LIKE US!

At the end of the day you are still famous. You're wealthy and privileged to a certain extent. You're living a better life in many ways than the general population.

Do not confuse being humble with downplaying your pedestal.

Being humble is recognizing where you come from and being grounded and grateful for your oppurtunities and platform and still acknowledging your success. Not reminding your 11 million followers that you have chips everyday.

AND YOU SHOULD BE PRIVATE TOO

It's fucking alluring. that's why we love Alexa Demie. Do you know anything about her??? Exactly. And it's hot.

Don't make your life so available to people, it's exclusive xx

LOVES AGAIN TO KPOP ANON

i could make a part 2 or "spin off" of this post, it was so fun

[artssslut2]

Unexpected: Part Two

Art Donaldson x Pregnant!Reader

Summary: You and Art figure out a plan after telling him you’re pregnant.

It had been about three weeks since you found out you were pregnant with your best friends baby. You hadn’t told anyone other than Art. You and Art really hadn’t even talked about it with each other, you stayed in his room almost every night since you found out but you refused to talk about it. Art had tried a few times but you shut it down right away. It was the last week of college before summer break, you decided you would talk about it and figure things out once break started, so you could get through finals. Tonight was the night before your last final of the year, you were quietly going over a textbook in Arts bed, Art sat next to you,

“Y/n.” You could tell by his tone what he was going to say. He wanted to talk about the baby.

“Not right now Art.” You spoke not looking away from the textbook. Art sighed. Guilt ran over you, this was his life too

“Tomorrow. After my final I promise.”

“Okay. Thank you.” He spoke softly, he kissed your cheek then rolled over to go to bed.

You didn’t sleep much that night, not because you were nervous for the test, but because you had to face reality with Art tomorrow. The final went well, you were sure you did great on it you always aced tests. You came back to Arts dorm and found him in it on the couch re gripping his racquet.

“Hey.” He looked at you

“Hi… can we talk?” You asked shyly barely looking at him.

“Of course come here, d-do you need anything?” He asked moving his tennis bag so you could sit.

“No im okay thank you.” It was weird, you were making this so formal and didn’t know why. You felt like you didn’t even know him.

“Y/n what’s going on. You’ve barely talked to me since you told me. Your acting weird, you can talk to me” he said from the heart, you didn’t think before speaking

“You don’t have to do this Art. You can leave. I’m not going to be mad. I won’t say anything I-“

“Stop. I’m not going anywhere, you know I would never do that” he came closer to you, you still wouldn’t look at him

“You should forget all of this art, you have a career ahead of you, you could be amazing. Don’t let this hold you back-

“Y/n. This isn’t holding me back. You are my -my… my family now. This is mine and I’m not leaving I’m here and I’m going to be here forever. I want this.” He stopped talking and turned around he grabbed a piece of paper from his bag and handed to you hesitating. You looked at it and your mouth dropped

“I withdrew from school today.” Art said quietly staring at the floor.

“What? Art why would you do that.” You felt frustration grow, how could he do this, let this change his life you were ruining his life. Tears came to your eyes,

“Before you freak out, this wasn’t because of the baby. I mean it was but… I don’t need to be here. I’m wasting time. I can go pro now, everyone says I can my coaches have been telling me all year. But I was scared I didn’t want to because I was terrified. This is helping me, I gotta do this, I can. I’ll have a real career-“

“Art! Stop. I’m ruining your life right now why don’t you see that?” You said your voice cracking

“I don’t think you are. I think this is one of the greatest things that could happen. I’ve never taken a risk in my entire life. But I am now… it is what it is and I’m making the best of it.” He said taking a deep breath.

“So this is great for you. What about me? How can I- what am I supposed to do.” You said giving into him. Art was quiet for a moment

“You do whatever you need. You’re not alone, if you need me to stay home I will. You come first here y/n” he grabbed your face. In this moment you knew why you secretly loved him.

“What are people gonna think?” You asked a tear falling down your cheek

“It doesn’t matter. We are gonna make this work. Who cares about anyone else” he pulled you into a hug. You felt your body relax. You knew it would be okay. You had Art, you felt safe again. You stayed wrapped in his arms for a minute breathing in the smell of his mint soap. Art pulled away,

“You’re gonna be mad at me for this but it’s good news.” Art said quietly pulling your face up. You looked confused,

“I told my parents.” He told you, your eyes went wide with fear, but before you could speak he continued

“They were- well they weren’t thrilled but they understood. They said we can stay in the beach house this summer and for however long we need.” He tucked your hair behind your ear. Then you remembered you weren’t even dating

“You don’t have to live with me art, we aren’t together.” You spoke

“Would you just shut up. I’m gonna live with you and you’re gonna like it. Were a family now.” He laughed. You smiled, maybe this wasn’t as bad as you thought.

“Thank you Art.” You said teary eyed. He smiled at you. He felt his heart swell at the thought of you happy.

You both had moved to Arts bed tangled in each other’s arms talking about the future, making a plan.

“I’m staying in school you know. I have too.” You told him he smiled at you,

“Of course you’re staying in school y/n” Art agreed kissing the top of your head. You felt his hand drop to your stomach hesitantly, he looked at you for reassurance, you gave a soft smile and he relaxed. He rubbed his thumb over the non existent bump. You didn’t mind, it calmed your nerves. Just then you had the realization that you were actually pregnant, not just having a baby you were going to be carrying a baby for nine months.

“Oh my god” you said thinking out loud

“What? Whats wrong?” He asked you fear coming over him

“I’m gonna get huge. Like there’s actually another person that’s going to explode inside of me.” You said with a terrified expression. Arts face softened and he smiled “what?!” You said hitting his chest.

“I think you will look beautiful.” You grinned pulling you back in. You huffed putting your head down on the pillow and art chuckled. What would he really think you thought to yourself. It’s not like you were dating or in love. He wouldn’t have to love you anyways. That’s a thought for tomorrow though.

[tiredfox64]

I saw someone do a similar thing where reader is dating johnny and uses bi han to make him jealous but there's was online can u do a bi han x fem reader where she tries to make johnny jealous with bi-han at johnnys OWN party and bi han basically kicks Johnny's ass

Pathetic

Prior notes: We can never give this man a break.

Pairing: Bi-Han x Afab reader

Warning‼️: A little bit of violence

Your relationship with Johnny is…well…it sure is a relationship by definition.

He never has time for you. It’s either obsessing over getting a role in the newest movie, staying relevant on Twitter, or stalking his ex-wife on social media. You don’t know why you still bother being with him at this point. You’re not mad that he still cares about his ex but blatantly ignoring you just to make sure he still has a high follower count is plain rude.

No amount of gifts or luxurious vacations can make you forget how shitty this relationship is. Forget about communicating with him. You told him a number of times how you just want to go on a simple date or spend the night together, but it always turns into this elaborate date night that would be a great post for Instagram. It’s tiring. It’s draining. It’s not what you want. You want better.

That does it! You did every healthy option that you were told and knew. You’re gonna have to manipulate the situation a little. Johnny is having a party at his mansion tomorrow, work with that. You might find yourself a better bachelor to enjoy.

══💤══╡°˖✧🦊✧˖°╞══💤══

Bi-Han was not keen on coming to Johnny’s party but Tomas so badly wanted to go. Kuai Liang did not want his younger brother to get into any trouble at the party so he dragged Bi-Han to come with them. Plus, it was probably a good time to make Bi-Han apologize for breaking Johnny’s Hichuli. It was one of a kind after all.

The place was blaring with music and reeked of vodka with a hint of boxed wine. This was definitely not his scene. He just stepped into the mansion and he already wanted to go home. He told Tomas they would only stay for an hour or two so he better make the most of it. Oh and don’t even try to touch the alcohol because it’s not the best quality. Not even the vodka. It’s not Tito’s so it’s shit.

Bi-Han walked over to a secluded corner of the mansion where he plopped down on the couch. He sat there, scowling at everyone with his arms crossed. Kuai Liang told him to fix his face since he was freaking people out. That’s exactly the point. He doesn’t want anyone around him or even try to bother him.

But you? Oh, you’re trying to poke the bear. Trying to poke two bears with the shit you’re about to pull.

You eyed Bi-Han from a distance. Ever since he first walked in you knew he would be your target. His strong facial features, that stance that radiated superiority and dominance, those muscles…good heavens…you were missing out. You had no idea how Johnny knew him but it didn’t matter. You were just happy that you had the chance to lay your eyes upon him. The way he sat enticed you. Legs that were slightly spread as his arms were folded, giving you another opportunity to see just how large his muscles are.

You totally forgot your objective. You’re trying to make Johnny jealous, not find yourself another boyfriend. You just want Johnny to pay attention to you again. Well, if it doesn’t work out, you at least know you have your eyes on someone else.

You walked over to Bi-Han, ignoring his aggressive stare. He was hoping you would turn away soon and not approach him but that clearly wouldn’t happen. You sat down beside him. Damn, he was even more handsome up close.

“You don’t seem to be enjoying yourself, stranger. What’s with that grumpy face?” You teased

He groaned while turning his head away from you. First try didn’t hit the mark. It’s okay, try again.

“Aww don’t be shy. I’m not trying to upset you. I’m only trying to be nice. You seemed lonely over here.” You started poking his bicep to tease him more.

“I prefer to be alone. There is no reason you should be here. Go back to drinking with the other imbeciles.”

“Do you see a cup in my hand? I don’t want to drink. I don’t even wanna be at this party.” You sighed in annoyance.

Bi-Han cocked his eyebrow up in interest. He was unsure if you were lying or not. Seeing your expression, however, told him that you were telling the truth. You seem bothered. He doesn’t want to care but he’s curious. Why would a pretty girl like you be so turned off by a party?

“Why are you here then?” He asked.

“My stupid boyfriend keeps throwing parties just to keep his social status up. Or maybe to make his ex jealous. I don’t even know anymore.”

Well, at least he knows who you are now. Johnny never said a word about you to anyone which let him know how you must be feeling. Poor thing, you must be deprived of many things. Bi-Han already had a grudge against Johnny from their first encounter. But getting an idea of how he was treating you just by what you said made him hate the guy even more.

You were surprised to feel Bi-Han’s arm slowly wrap around your shoulders and pull you in closer. Your plan seems to be going well. Except you forgot your goal again. You were more focused on how your body was pressed up against his. He wasn’t looking at you since he was somewhat embarrassed that he was caring at all. But you seem like a nice girl so he can take some time to give you what Johnny couldn’t. He can give you attention.

Maybe he’ll extend their visit to three hours.

══💤══╡°˖✧🦊✧˖°╞══💤══

Things happen, that’s all I gotta say.

You somehow ended up on Bi-Han’s lap with your arms wrapped around his neck and your legs draped over his legs. One of his arms was wrapped around your waist while the other held onto your thighs.

You went on and on about your lackluster relationship with Johnny. Of course, you would switch topics occasionally, talking about your hobbies which Johnny would never pay any mind to. Bi-Han sat there and listened to what you were saying. Though he did get distracted occasionally by your thighs that he would occasionally squeeze or how close your chest was to his face.

Johnny was going around, asking people if they had seen you. He walked through the crowd while calling your name. Finally he spotted you…on Bi-Han’s lap. He was shocked. This anger inside Johnny started rising up inside him. First Bi-Han comes to his mansion and destroys his Hichuli. Now he is trying to steal his girl! Fuck that!

Johnny came stomping over, yelling at you to get off his lap. It’s been five hours and only now Johnny thought about checking up on you. You two start arguing loudly. You told him you’ll get off when you feel like it. He told you to get off right this moment. The arguing was bringing the party to a halt, causing everyone to turn their heads towards you. Shit, they didn’t even know he was dating you. Bi-Han was not happy about the attention that was being turned towards this direction.

Johnny yanked you off Bi-Han’s lap while quickly pissed him off. He stood up quickly while glaring at Johnny for putting his hands on you. Johnny turned his attention to Bi-Han.

“You come into my mansion, break my stuff, then try to steal my girl? You know what, fuck yo—”

BAM! Bi-Han punched Johnny right in the face. It disoriented him immediately which allowed Bi-Han to kick him right in the face, sending him sliding across the floor. Straight to sleep, man was knocked out. You stood there in shock yet you were also impressed. It only took two hits and Johnny was down. He was sober as well so this wasn’t a drunk blackout.

“I expected better from you, Cage. I see it was foolish of me to set the bar so high,” Bi-Han berated him, “Kuai Liang! Grab Tomas, we are leaving.”

Kuai Liang quickly grabbed Tomas who was stumbling a bit. He was slurring his words while saying “I’m so happy you are my brothers” and “I’m sorry I drank that. It tasted like juice.” Before they left Bi-Han turned towards you and motioned for you to come. You pointed at yourself in confusion.

“Do you wish to stay with him?” He asked.

You glanced at Johnny who was still on the ground. Nah, you’ll go. You could go for a stronger man. Good riddance Johnny, hellooooooo Bi-Han.

After notes: This is the first time I’ve actually written on my laptop and then transferred it over here. I was using Notes before and imma be honest I think my notes app is ready to die. It’s just a bunch of fanfic in there and lists of analog horror series and kaijus. I hope i understood what you meant because I had to reread it multiple times to get it. I think it’s a me problem. Adiós!

[howi99]

Forever fall accident

Nora: *looking at the sap from the tree slowly filling her jar* Soon, soon you will be mine~

Ren: *sigh* Nora, the sap is not for you. It's for the professors. Please don't drink another jar... Again.

Nora: *cheekily* I can't promise~

Pyrrha: *looking around* Did anyone see Jaune?

Nora: *looking up to Pyrrha* Maybe the call of nature got the best of him?

Ren: *sigh even louder* Nora, i don't think Jaune would just leave without saying a word just to go to the bathroom.

Pyrrha: He probably was lost in his own head. He does that a lot, we should try finding him.

______________

Jaune: *looking at team CRDL* Now that i helped you with getting more sap, do you need anything else?

Cardin: *smiling* Jauney boy, you've been such a good help today. So much so that me and my team decided to finally move on from you.

Jaune: ... What do you mean?

Cardin: *taking one of the jar* See, whatever we do to you, you seem to not mind. And frankly, it's booooriiiiing. So, instead of trying to get a reaction from you, we thought "what if we tried on someone else?"

Jaune: ...

Cardin: Now, we both know how much of a pushover you are, soooo *put the jar back in Jaune's hand* We want YOU to throw that bottle at Pyrrha.

Jaune: ... Excuse me?

Sky: *with a box in his hands* We got a rapier wasp nest, and they love sap!

Cardin: *spitting on the ground* She keeps beating us up because we are a bit rowdy with you. And we want to teach her a lesson. And you *poke Jaune chest* will help us.

Jaune: ... *Sigh* Cardin, i give you 10 seconds after I finish speaking to reconsider your actions.

Cardin: *laugh* You think you can threaten me? We all saw how bad you were during practice.

The jar breaks in Jaune's hand

Jaune: *coldly staring at cardin* The only reason i don't do well in class is because if i actually tried, i might kill people. Now, i will ask you again to rethink your decision, Cardin.

Cardin: *a bit less sure* You might be good at bluffing, but i still know that you wouldn't be able to fight the 4 of us by yourself! I- *get punch in the guts. Then, while trying to catch his breath, Jaune caught him by the throat* Ack!

Dove, Sky and Russel: *ready their weapons*

Jaune: 10 seconds. *Sigh* i let you walk all over me, pushed me and sent me into dangerous situations but i didn't care because you weren't trying to hurt anyone that was important, just me. *Bringing Cardin to eye level, not even flinching when Cardin desperately tried to punch him to get released* But you had to try going for the ones that matter. Now this is your last warning Cardin; Forget your plan, and i won't break your neck like a twig. *Jaune's grip tightens even more, breaking Cardin aura*

Sky: *screaming* URSA! WE GOT URSA!

Jaune: *finally look around him, seeing the Ursa's encircling the group* Hm... *Release Cardin* Get out. All of you.

Dove: H-how!? There's no exit!

Jaune: *smiling* You make yourself a path. *Goes in front of one of the Ursa* Like this! *Use his spear to behead the ursa in one swing*

Sky and Russel: *help Cardin getting back up*

Dove: *looking at Jaune smiling after killing the grimm* You freak...

Jaune: *turning to Dove* Yes, i am.

___________

Pyrrha: Jaune! Where are you!

Nora: Fearless leader, we got sap for your dessert! We know you love making them!

Ren: ... Nora, i highly doubt he will-

Jaune: *coming out from the trees* More sap? Nice, my jars are broken!

Pyrrha: Jaune! *Goes to him* Thanks the gods you are okay and- *look at the broken lance* What happened!?

Jaune: Oh, you know, a little grimm ambush. *Smile* Nothing to worry about.

Ren: We were supposed to tell Glynda for any sighting of grimm.

Jaune: Don't worry, their's none left. *Turning to Nora* And you won't need to break Cardin's legs, i don't think he will try anything else against us.

Nora: Ohoh!~ You kicked his ass?

Jaune: *scratching the back of his head* Not necessarily. But i don't think he will want to try anything else.

________

Team RWBY is walking back to the bullhead

Yang: ... He was laughing.

Blake: ... Yeah.

Weiss: he dismembered those grimm like if they were made out of paper.

Ruby: *sigh* and the way he talked to Cardin...

Blake: Can't say he hadn't it coming.

Yang: ...

Ruby: *looking at Yang* Hey, i know what it looks like, but i'm sure we can talk with him about it, right?

Yang: *sigh* Yeah... Probably.

[tangents-within-tangents]

The Bad Batch as Penguins of Madagascar Quotes

Bc I’ve seen a few posts making this magnificent comparison and both of these squads are near and dear to my heart and bc I need a distraction from the s3 premiere ahhh

Tech: *mission relevant info* Hunter: Tell me something I don’t know! Tech: Without mucus your stomach would digest itself Hunter: … Hunter: Tell me something else I don’t know…something less disturbing

Hunter: (to Caleb) It's okay, kid. We're not going to hurt you Crosshair: *cocks his gun* Not true, Hunter, they did authorize lethal force

Wrecker: *absolutely decking his bros* You pillow fight like a bunch of little girls!

Crosshair: What part of "zip it" eludes you?! The "zip" or the "it"?!

Echo: I don't mind saying it, that guy vexes me. *narrows eyes* He's a vexer.

Hunter: Boys, no training tonight. It's game night! Tech: Trivia! Let's play trivia! I dominate trivia! Omega: Oh! Can we play Simon Says this week? Tech: Yes, Simon says we play TRIVIA!!

Crosshair: I find reason tedious and boring. We'll use force.

Echo: I'm sorry, boys. I sometimes resort to sarcasm when facing the unknown Tech: No doubt

Hunter: Oh I’ve seen accident prone, try Wrecker and Crosshair! With a Chandrilan lantern! And SIX BOTTLES of rocket fuel!! Tech: Worst talent show ever

Hunter: There's no such thing as too paranoid, Omega. Remember that, and forget you ever heard it!

Tech: SCIENCE! WHY HAVE YOU FORSAKEN ME?!?

Omega: I have an idea! But I'm not sure how safe it is Wrecker: I like it already!

Crosshair: *while fighting* You cannot win, Hunter! I am fueled with a boiling hate! A raging fury! Hunter: And a babbling mouth! *slaps him*

Omega: No! I swore I’d never use my adorability as a weapon again, and I meant it!

Echo: Wrecker, cover Omega’s ears, I intend to use my angry words

Tech: This red line shows the frustration level of a really smart person forced to take orders from some dunder-brained boob. As you can see the frustration just keeps rising and rising and rising. I mean, why don't they put the smart guy in charge, huh? IT DOESN’T MAKE ANY SENSE! SOMETHING HAS GOT TO GIVE, PEOPLE! AM I THE ONLY ONE SEEING THIS?!

Wrecker and Omega: *run in making incomprehensible panicked noises* Hunter: Anyone catch that? Echo: *nonchalantly interprets it exactly* The Batch: … Echo: What? I’m fluent in panic

Tech: Cool cars go faster. That's a scientific fact.

Cody, in his one episode: I believe now I know why “volunteers” ends in “tears”

Hunter: No batcher gets left behind, that’s why! Wrecker: What about Crosshair? Hunter: Okay, one batcher gets left behind Omega: and Echo? Hunter: Maybe two batchers get left behind Tech: Um… Hunter: *groan* Comparatively few batchers get left behind, okay?!

Omega: I thought you agreed this was a dangerous weapon! Wrecker: Which is the best kind! What good is a safe weapon?! Tech: He has a point

Hunter: Avert your eyes, young Omega, you’ll never be able to unsee this! Tech, recording bc that’s his freaking hobby: Don’t worry about it I’ll burn you a dvd!

Crosshair: *standing outside the Marauder* Hunter! I have brought you a hand drawn greeting card! It says “Roses are red. Posies are green. Sorry about Bracca, I was too mean. Your pal, Crosshair” :) Hunter: *walks out and shreds the card*

Hunter: Get up here. That’s an order! Tech: *salutes* Permission to defy order? Hunter: Permission denied! Tech: Then I deny your denial (sorry)

Echo: *watching Hunter and Wrecker, captured and surrounded by stormtroopers* Well this hardly seems fair Echo: *jumps in a walker and defeats them easily* Told you it wasn't fair

*Phee and Tech kiss* Omega: *eyes being covered by Hunter* awww Wrecker: Finally!

[slutforln4]

worship — joel miller.

summary. to believe in god is to commit to his rules. joel miller managed to make you break one of them.

pairing. dbf!joel & christian!fem!reader

warnings. your dad's best friend? more like your controversially old sex buddy! 😂 (reader is in their early 20s, joel is in his mid 40s), jesus freak sucks dick!! (m receiving oral), smut, edging, dirty talk, fingering, lots of religious references, joel is compared to god and reader sorta worships him idk

this goes without saying, 18+ MDNI, i'm not responsible for what media you consume, beware for your own good

word count. 3k

author's note. hellooo everyone :) i hope this fic doesnt offend the hearts of anyone christian who shall read this (... are you really christian if you read this filth...) but i hope you enjoy! completely unrelated note— the happy trail makes me go crazy.

taglist. @cordeliapaugou

“Hey, kiddo.”

The last thing you expected to wake up to was your father and Joel Miller drinking coffee at the dining table. If you had known you’d be waking up to guests, you would’ve at least put your PJ pants back on— instead, you’re just in your pink underwear.

“Uh,” you tiredly rub your eye, “hey, Joel.” Your father looks at you with narrow eyes, so you correct yourself. "Mr.Miller.”

Joel shakes his head, “no need for the formality, honey, it’s just Joel.”

You give your dad a look, a small and proud smile on your face. You’re not fourteen anymore and Mr. Miller is Joel to your twenty year old self. Your dad just sometimes forgets that you’re no longer his little girl.

“What’re ya talkin’ about?” You ask, setting on the kettle to make some tea for yourself.

“Just stuff,” Joel shrugs. “Since when did ya get a texan accent?”

You can see your father’s shoulders slightly shake with a chuckle. “She’s been spending too much time with her mom down south, picking up her accent and all.”

“It ain’t as bad as ya make it out to be, dad.” You roll your eyes. “Besides, it only comes out when speaking to someone else who’s a Texan, like Joel.”

You make yourself the tea, turning your attention to making sure not to spill meanwhile your father’s talking about going to a city a few days away and how he can't just leave you at home.

You can't help but look at Joel from the corner of your eye as you blow your tea, him staring right back at you. His arms are large and you can see the outline of toned muscles underneath that flannel he’s wearing, and God the way his hair is naturally messy, but it suits him so perfectly, it makes your knees buckle just at the thought of your fingers tangled in it.

Was this weird? He’s been your dad’s best friend since you were like eleven, you only met him when you were fourteen and even then, he showed you love as if you were his own daughter.

You wondered what went through that mind of his when he traced his eyes down your body, gaze lingering on your pink panties for a little too long. Did he think this was weird, too? The way he licked his lips when you sat down on the island in your kitchen, slightly spreading your knees apart, made you think differently.

“You okay with that, hon?” Your father's voice pulls you back into reality.

“Hm?”

Your dad walked over to you, leaving Joel to sit alone at the dining table. “I’ve got a work trip for the next week, you think Joel could keep an eye out for you?”

“I don't need a babysitter, dad.” You roll your eyes, taking a small sip of your tea. It’s a smidge too sweet, but there's not much to change now.

“I know, I know,” he sighs. “But you know how there's these girls on TV? The one’s going missing?” You nod, hesitantly. “I don't want to see you on TV, honey. Joel was gonna stay with us anyway, since he’s visiting.”

You think it over, silencing the butterflies in your tummy. “Okay, fine. Just promise he ain't a big ol’ grump like Sarah said he was.” You laugh and he pinches your cheek. “Good luck at work, dad.”

“Be a good girl, alright?”

You watch your dad’s car pull out of the driveway, waving goodbye to him. He goes on trips like these often, but they take place conveniently when you’re visiting your mother, so it's weird being home alone.

Except, you’re not home alone. Joel’s here.

The same Joel who was sitting in your dining room a few hours prior and watching you in your underwear like a predator hunting its prey. Much like the hunting nonsense Joel is watching, as he’s sprawled out on the couch.

You walk past him and up into your room, leaving a slight gap between the door and doorframe. You have college stuff to catch up on, so you open up your computer and open up your assignments.

About twenty minutes in, halfway through an essay about human evolution and what difference it made to their psychology, you hear a knock on your door.

You turn around and see Joel’s head peeking into your room, eyes scanning it as if he won't be checking up on you for the next week. “Hey, kid. I ordered pizza, should be delivered in half an hour.”

“Oh,” you swallow dryly. “Alright, I’ll be down then.”

“Ya alright?”

“Mhm, just doin’ some college work.” You smile softly. “I’ll be done until the pizza’s here.”

Joel nods, and you get the feeling that there's something more he wants to say, but he’s holding back. Before you can ask, he’s halfway down the stairs.

Another twenty minutes pass and you’re done with the essay. You jog down the stairs, your loose shorts bouncing along with you. Joel’s in the kitchen, pulling out a couple plates when you walk in. “Hey, I was just boutta call ya.”

“What kinda pizza did you get?” You ask, watching as he opens the box to reveal a cheesy, pepperoni pizza. “Nice,” you smile up at him.

He hands you a plate with a slice in the middle of it. “So, how’s college?”

You shrug, taking a bite of the pizza. “It's fine. Not much is fun ‘bout it.”

Joel chuckles. “Yeah, I remember my college days. I was rowdy back then. Unlike you. Goody two shoes, eh?” He raises a brow in your direction and you feel the butterflies blooming in your stomach again.

“I guess so.” You smile, softly. “I got a naughty side to me, ya know.” You notice the way Joel’s lip quirks up at the side, as if he’s satisfied with your answer.

“Yeah?” He locks his eyes with yours, the gaze alone making your knees buckle. Good thing you’re sitting on the kitchen island or else you’d be a melted puddle by his feet. “I guess all good girls are bad girls, in some ways.”

“Mhm, exactly that.” you set your plate down and bite your bottom lip, palms resting on the surface you’re sitting on. “I’m a good girl for the most part.”

“I know ya are,” he smiles at you and follows you to the dining room, where you sit and eat together, catching up since the last time he saw you. He tells you about his daughter and how she’s getting married soon. You tell him about your college major and plans after you graduate, which intrigues him more than anything.

The strong gaze from a much older man is more than enough to make a girl like you flustered.

Joel noticed the red rush to your cheeks, the way your eyes didn't meet his for the rest of the meal, and the way your fingers fiddled with each other.

Joel asks if you still go to church, and you nod. You know that he asks this to know if you still worship the Lord enough to not give into the sin. “Do you?”

Joel shakes his head. “Haven’t been to church in years. Don’t trust God no more.”

“I’m sure there's still a part of you that loves God, no?” You ask. “The good Lord wants us to worship him, and that’s what we should be doing.”

When Joel doesn't answer, instead looking at you with a crease between his brows, you get up with your plate and go wash it in the sink. Washing dishes has gotta be your least favourite chore, so you’ve learnt to adapt and get over it, and that is by occupying the rest of your body as your hands work on the dish.

Meaning that you hum some sorta song while swaying your hips along to it.

You can’t hear Joel coming into the kitchen, so you continue swaying your hips in those shorts of yours, as you mumble the lyrics to whatever song you’re thinking about.

It’s only when you feel a hand on your waist and his face close to your ear, that you realise Joel is there. He leans into your ear, pressing himself against you. You can feel his erection against the thin material of your shorts, causing a damp spot form in your underwear.

“You enjoyin’ yourself, sugar?” He whispers, his hand sliding down from your waist and pressing on your belly. “You enjoy teasin’ me, hm?”

“Teasing? I wasn't- I-”

Joel chuckles. “Don’t think I didn't see ya starin’ at me this mornin’. Spreadin’ your pretty little legs for me, hm?” You feel his fingers slide down under the waistband of your shorts, getting dangerously close.

Joel’s fingers ghost over your clothed clit and you jolt back at the feeling, accidentally rubbing yourself up against his erection again. His pointer finger trails down from your clothed clit and to the dampness in your underwear.

“You said you’re a saint, hm? Gettin’ so wet for me,” he kisses on your neck. “Ain’t that a sin, sweetheart?”

You shake your head. “It’s just… Fuck,” his fingers pull the waistband of your underwear up, making way for them so slide between it. His pointer finger teases your clit, earning more whimpers from you.

“It’s just what, honey?”

“It’s just human nature.” You stifle a gasp when his finger pushes into your core, gathering some of your wetness before dragging up to your clit. He starts rubbing slow circles on your clit, kissing on your neck and grinding his dick against your ass. A moan leaves your lips and you feel him smirk against your neck.

“Human nature, hm?” He mumbles. “Will it be human nature when I bend ya over the sink and fuck you like the little slut ya are?”

You whimper at his words, his finger applying pressure to your clit as he twirls it. “No, Joel, we should-... We should stop.” You contradict your own statement by arching your back and rubbing up against his hard cock, when his middle finger teases your hole.

“If ya want me to stop, why are ya grinding on my cock, hm?” His other hand grabs your jaw and turns your face to him, tears already threatening to spill at the feeling of his fingers thrusting in and out of you. Joel gets so close to your lips that he might just kiss you, and his fingers thrust in and out of you at a pace that’ll for sure make you cum, and when you think he’ll let you spill all over his fingers… He pulls away.

His hand is no longer on your soaked pussy and his lips are no longer mere inches away from your lips. You’re left dumbfounded, standing there by the sink.

You follow him to the living room. “What was that?”

Joel shrugs. “Ya wanted to stop, so I stopped.”

“Yes, but-” you groan, annoyed. He sits down on the couch, immediately manspreading and doing nothing about his erect cock as he turns on the TV and crosses his arms behind his head. You look down at his lap, at his thighs and the way his arms look in that tight t-shirt of his. Fuck, how badly you want that cock twitching inside of you.

But it goes against your religion and you’re not willing to sacrifice it for him, or his masculine bliss that would surely turn a girl like you into a woman.

Your feet work faster than your mind and all of a sudden you’re standing between his legs, tugging off your shorts and panties. Joel’s eyes widen when you sit down, hands propped up against his chest, and begin rubbing yourself against his thigh. After a few moments, your waist is embraced by his large hands and he’s guiding you.

There’s already a wet spot on his jeans, and Joel smirks at the sight. “Ain’t you a lil’ sinner, hm?”

“N-No.” You say, firmly, as his hands guide you to continue riding his thigh.

“The Good Lord wants us to worship in a different way, sometimes.” Joel says, his lips on your jaw, sending a trail of kisses down to your neck. He gently bites the skin and sucks on it, leaving his mark on you.

“Fuck,” you moan as you near your orgasm. You feel your clit throb against the material of his jeans and he feels it, too. His hands find your clit and rub it as you continue riding his thigh, his eyes not leaving your face. He watches as your face contorts into a look of pleasure, tears threatening to spill from your eyes.

“Let go, baby,” he praises. “Let go.”

You feel yourself grip onto his arm, nails digging into his skin as you cum all over his jeans, a loud moan erupting when you do.

“Naughty, naughty girl you are, hm?” He smirks when you gladly take his soaked finger into your mouth, sucking it off. Joel’s eyes are half-lidded and lustful, making you feel butterflies. “Be a good girl and go clean yourself up.”

“But what about…” You point to the bulge in his jeans. You’re such a sweetheart, Joel thinks, as his fingers pry open your mouth. He puts his thumb into your mouth and you suck on it, as he undoes his belt with one hand. Joel’s finger pushes back the waistband of his boxers and your eyes widen at his dick as it springs up and hits Joel’s belly.

He pulls his thumb out of your mouth, a string of saliva connecting it to your lips. He spreads it on his tip, mixing in with the pre-cum, before he taps it against your lips.

You open your mouth and he pushes the tip past your lips, going slightly deeper into your throat with every second. You feel his hand come up to caress your cheek as he continues guiding his cock down your throat. When he hits the back of it, you gag and he pulls it out immediately. “We don't gotta do anythin’ you don't want to, darlin’.”

“I want to do this for you,” you mumble, licking your lips. The taste of his precum enters your mouth and you feel yourself slipping into the sinful path of lust.

When Joel’s eyes meet yours, and the change from a soft gaze to something lustful made his dick twitch in his hand.

“Alright, then open up, sweetheart,” he puts his dick up to your lips again.

You part your lips, he slips inside, every prayer and holy word dissolves on the tip of your tongue. He tastes like sin and clandestine pleasure, such God would not approve of. But you don't care. With every inch he enters your mouth, you feel yourself fluttering and all those butterflies in your stomach blooming into some new release.

The sounds Joel makes are enough for you to consider this a new type of worship, just like Joel said. His moans could easily suffice the worship of God and you wouldn't mind.

When you feel him twitch, a moan erupts from your throat and rumbles through your mouth. Joel moans your name, thrusting himself deeper into your mouth, hitting the back of your throat and making you gag, all while you’re whimpering and tears are rolling down your cheeks.

“I’m ‘bout to come, baby,” he warns you, but you surprise him by keeping his dick in your mouth. Your hand comes up to stroke the base of his cock, adding that last bit of pleasure before you feel his hotness release down your throat. He pulls it out, a few strings of cum landing on your lips. He brings his thumb up to clean it, but you lick your lips clean with a devilish smile on your face.

The salty sweetness he released slides down your throat like it's holy water. When Joel’s fingertips wipe away the tears from your eyes, you’re kissing on his palms and mumbling sweet nothings.

Joel sits you in his lap after he stuffs it back into his pants, his hands on your thighs as you straddle him. His gaze is on your face, memorising every detail of it as if he were to forget it as soon as he closed his eyes.

The fiery touch of his makes shockwaves erupt on your skin, making their way to your brain and multiplying that fuzzy feeling in it.

“Go clean up,” he says, his lips placing tender kisses on your neck. In all honesty, you’re content right then and there. You nuzzle your head in the crook of his neck, drawing circles on his revealed collarbone with your finger. “Ya want to cuddle?”

“Mhm,” you hum against his neck. “All this worship’s made me tired.”

Joel laughs at your little joke. “‘M sure it has, baby.” He kisses the top of your head and caresses your back, as gentle as you felt God’s word. You could get used to this— the slow and gentle worship, one that you don't have to be forced into.

You could stop going to church and instead kneel in front of Joel, the hardwood floor imprinting on your knees as you two’s moans replace every prayer.

Joel’s strong arms pick you up and he carries you upstairs, opening the door to your bedroom. When he sets you down, you tug on his bicep. “Lay with me.”

“Anythin’ ya want, baby,” he hums, pulling the covers over the both of you as he lays down next to you. His arms hug your waist and you put your face in his chest, inhaling his scent. This is as close as you'll ever get to heaven— the strong smell of Joel’s cologne, his arms warming your body and heartbeat lulling you to sleep.

You wrap your arms around his torso, pulling him tighter to yourself as sleep overruns your body. “Goodnight, Joel.”

Joel’s lips press to your forehead and he caresses your hair. You both know how wrong this is, but God, you can't stop. Joel is so gentle with you, in his touch, in his words, you feel like he’s actually treating you like you deserve to be treated. And he doesn't regret it one bit. He would do it all over again.

He doesn't reject the words that come out of his lips, because he knows they’re true.

“I worship you, princess. Sleep tight.”

[greensagephase]

a random thought/imagine because I NEED to run into a Miguel at a Mexican party and falling in love with him! @fairlyang 's post got me going, I was going to reblog my crazy scenario through their post, and then this turned TOO LONG (I'm delusional, so that's why this is so detailed)!!

If you're not Latina/Mexican - just hear a delusional woman out plsssss (me hoping to manifest by writing this fr fr)

Going to a Mexican party, sitting at a table with my family because soy una muchacha seria y callada (I'm a serious and quiet girl), so I'm not on the dance floor, but I see Miguel in the crowd with the other men talking, dressed with a sombrero and botas (cowboy hat and boots), wearing gold jewelry (he's Mexican he has to wear gold jewelry, sorry not sorry).

I'm trying very hard not to stare and make it obvious because my fam is there and I'm a good family girl, a proper señorita, who hasn't been with anyone nor has done anything with anyone (this is my version guys, so don't mind the personal touches here) but !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'M ALREADY IMAGINING WHAT HIS VOICE SOUNDS LIKE, HOW MUCH TALLER HE'D BE IF I WERE STANDING IN FRONT OF EACH OTHER!! I'm subtly -oh so subtly- admiring his large broad shoulders and BACKKK (having some serious thoughts about this part; hint: my long nails, anywayyyy), the way he stands, his thick thighs, the way he lifts a cup to his mouth, his laugh, his smile - yall, I'm planning a whole wedding, even though I know I'm not making a damn move because your girl IS SHY IRL (a moment for the shy girls ✊🏼😔), but a girl can daydream behind the centros de mesa (table centerpieces) my mom and grandma are taking home by the end of the night!!

I keep watching him, subtly, telling myself it's silly but I keep daydreaming anyway. IT'S FREE!!!!!!

He ends up spotting me from across the room while some love song is playing in the background because you know, Latinos and our love songs!! It's probably something like "Háblame de Ti" by Banda MS or some song by Grupo Frontera like "Bebe Dame" 😍 (iykyk) anyway, the music is not helping your delusional girl (me, you, us, everyone).

Imagine imagine imagine - MAKING EYE CONTACT WITH HIM AS HE BRINGS THE CUP TO HIS MOUTH WITH A LITTLE SMIRKKK-(why did I just get goosebumps?) YALL YAL YALL

Freezing up and going through all stages of grief because I was caught staring !!!!!!!!!!!! I look away, trying to play it off even though my cheeks are the color of the red flowers adorning the room!!! I'm drinking some water, trying to C H I L L because I can feel his gaze on me.

Thinking it's safe, I look again AND - HE'S STARING

Then for idk how long it's just a lot of ignoring/pretending that's not happening because once again, I'M SHYYYY (once I get to know you I open up but like, it takes a hot week) but I'm just thinking, "este hombre" (this man; also wondering what his name is and why I've never seen this man before???) because I'm literally dying pretending I'm okay and fighting the inappropriate thoughts while sitting next to my grandma because Miguel keeps staring, going along with his conversation with the men (who have noticed him staring and probably tease him about making a move, or telling him to forget it because "esa muchacha/morra no baila con nadie" (that girl doesn't dance with anyone). So he just watches from a distance, trying to gather some info and noticing little things like how I'm avoiding his gaze, the nervous smile, trying to pretend that side of the building doesn't exist-

and thennnnnnnnnnnnnnn

at some point he leaves his side of the room, steps determined. I once again *subtly* notice this and then freak out when he's coming my way but I'm like "no way, right? right?" *hearts racing abnormally*

IMAGINE HIM APPROACHING THE TABLE AND INTRODUCING HIMSELF TO YOUR PARENTS AND GRANDMA, OR WHOEVER ELSE IS THERE?? And then looking at you, giving you a gentle, soft smile WITH SOME MISCHIEF BEHIND THE MOST BEAUTIFUL BROWN EYES YOU'VE EVER HAD THE PRIVILIGE LAYING EYES ON AND MAKING YOU FEEL THINGS - or like a commenter said the other day in one of my posts "senti cosas de mujer" (I felt women things)!! YOU'RE FEELING THINGS THINGS !!!

AND HE ASKS YOUR PARENTS IF HE CAN ASK YOU TO DANCE WITH HIM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! BECAUSE HE REALIZES YOU'RE A FAMILY GIRL, AND THAT'S HOW HE'S GOING TO WIN YOUR FAMILY SO HE CAN HAVE YOU BECAUSE MANS HAS ALSO ALREADY PLANNED THE WEDDING RECEPTION'S MENU !!!!!!!!!!!

ok bye, thank you for listening to my unhinged scenario but in all seriousness - God - I've seen what you've done for others !!!!! Send a Miguel O'Hara lookalike my way with sombrero y botas, chest hair, and gold jewelry, and who knows how to fix the light that turned on in my vehicle, which I've been ignoring for months, and who helps with the masa for the tamales para Navidad (helps with the tamales dough for Christmas) because he has large, warm hands 🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼

[vampyrixdarling]

Shadow SH comfort

TW: heavily implied SH. That’s obvious.

Not gonna decorate this like my other works. I wrote this for me, and anyone else who needed it.

Word count: 900

Shadow sighed as he held up your arm, noticing how you winced in pain at the sudden contact. His sigh, however, was not one of anger. It was more so disappointment. Your arm was still sore, the stinging pain never once leaving as Shadow poured some disinfectant onto a rag, holding it above the wound.

He paused for a moment but began to speak. “This might hurt,” he said. “Are you ready?” You nodded, looking away and biting the inside of your cheek. He hummed, placing the rag onto the cuts as you hissed in pain. His eyes widened, taking into account how your breathing became more fast.

“Shh.. it’s okay.” Shadow spoke. His voice was deep and soothing as he attempted to comfort you. “I’m not mad. I promise. But you’re going to be okay. I’ll make sure of it.”

You nodded, closing your eyes tight as you tried to think of something else— anything else than the substance cleaning your wounds. You felt ashamed. You felt horrible for scaring Shadow like that. You’d never forget the face he made when he saw you with the instrument above your soft skin. It wasn’t fair to him, having him waste all his time and emotions on you.

“…Why did you do this?”

You didn’t have an answer for him. You wanted to come up with one so badly, really you did, but you couldn’t. And the more you thought of it, the more your face heated up and you felt like sobbing all over again.

He looked at you again, removing the cloth as he grabbed bandages from the first aid kit beside you two. He wasn’t pleased with the lack of an answer, but he didn’t press further.

“Shadow.. I…” you began. You couldn’t finish your sentence no matter how hard you tried. It was like something was stuck in your throat, preventing you from saying anything you wanted to. “It’s okay,” he reassured you. “Don’t worry.”

You looked at him again, tears threatening to spill from your eyes. He looked like he wanted to say something. If you were to guess, he was probably trying to decide how to word it. As he wrapped part of the bandage around your arm, you winced in pain again.

“I’m sorry.”

That was all he said. He continued bandaging your arm, trying to be as gentle with you as possible. “…for what?” You asked. He didn’t answer for a moment. Instead he looked up at you, his red eyes making contact with yours. Was he mad at you? Fuck. He was totally mad. This was a mistake. It was a mistake coming to him. He probably thinks you’re a freak, he probably wants to break up with you. Why would he want to be with you when you—

“[Name].”

His voice brought you into reality once again as he repeated it. Your name rolled off his tongue perfectly. You blinked at him, and he took your silence as one of confusion. So he repeated himself.

“I’m sorry for not being here for you. I-.. I didn’t know. It must have been really bad, feeling as if I wasn’t here for you. But I am. Really, and I want to be. You’re amazing. Stunning. The most gorgeous person I’ve ever laid eyes on. I care about you a lot, you know. And.. I know I don’t fully understand this, but I want to. I want to understand how and why you’re hurting so I can help you. I love you.” He confessed.

…that was it. His eyes widened as you began to cry. He quickly finished wrapping your arm and looked back to you, putting a hand on your cheek. You couldn’t help but apologize through sobs. Again, and again, and again.

“[Name].. Don’t be sorry. Don’t apologize. There’s nothing you need to apologize for.” He said. You didn’t stop though. It wasn’t long before he extended his arms, silently offering you a hug. And you took it. You hugged him, pulling him close as you buried your face into his neck, still sobbing. He hugged back, rubbing circled along his back as he did his best to comfort you, whispering reassurances and comforting words.

“There are other alternatives.” He said. “Like a rubber band. Or drawing, whether that’s on your arm with a marker, or a pen.. you don’t need to hurt yourself. You’re good enough, [Name]. There’s other options than punishing your body with permanent scars.”

You nodded. It wasn’t long before he sighed. He wanted to help you in any way he could. So he’d try his best.

“…I’m scared of losing you.” He admitted. “You’re the best thing to ever happen to me. Every day I wake up and think to myself.. ‘how did I get so lucky?’.. you deserve so much more. So much more than what you have. Life isn’t fair, I know that. But.. but you’re not alone. Not when I’m here. And I won’t let you believe that you are. I love you. I love you so much..”

This was rare for Shadow. For him to truly get all emotional like this. But his words made you feel better. He hugged you tighter.

“…So when you’re ready… I’ll be ready. You can tell me what you’re going through. And we can talk about it. Together.”

You nodded, and it wasn’t long before you spoke.

[crimeronan]

“Okay, so you were my guard,” Luz says.

"Yeah. Among other things."

“But I don’t, um – I don’t actually need that here. Guarding, I mean. I’m not royalty anymore. And the people here are okay, mostly, except when they suck, and then Vee goes after them anyway. I don't… I’m not sure I can…”

She trails off, less because she’s trying to formulate sentences and more because she can see Hunter’s heart shatter. Even as she does, she checks herself – what does she know about his feelings, really? His face barely crumples. He just closes his eyes for a second, and presses his mouth flat, and swallows. Then he takes a breath and faces her with the exact same calm as before.

She doesn’t know why she’s so certain that’s heartbreak. In anyone else, she’d read it as tiredness or annoyance.

“I’m coming on too strong,” he says, and his voice is just as steady as it always is, no outward signs of distress. “I'm sorry.”

“You don’t need to apologize,” Luz says, and means it. “I can tell you’ve had, just, the worst time. And I know this isn't what you hoped for. I just – I don't know what you want with the human world, besides me. Won’t you miss home?”

“You're forgetting I’m not allowed to go home either way right now,” Hunter says, “on account of the atrocities.”

Luz rolls her eyes. “Don’t be a smartass.”

His mouth twitches. He might be trying not to smile.

“I’m just saying,” she continues, “you found me. You did find me. Like you wanted to. And I’m safe here, like you want me to be. So you don't have to… I mean, you did your duty. You did what you were supposed to do. I hereby release you from any further contractual obligations. Okay?”

It’s meant as a reprieve, but Luz immediately knows that she’s chosen the wrong thing to say. Hunter isn’t quite as good at masking this new heartbreak. His fingers spasm, curling around the edge of the couch cushion, gripping like a lifeline. He lets out the kind of breath that someone might if they’d just been shot. His ears flatten, pointing toward the floor, an unconscious reflex that makes him look like a kicked puppy.

When he speaks, his voice cracks. “You don’t want me?”

Luz feels her own expression crumble. Confusion and guilt war for dominance inside her, a stitch between the ribs.

“Here,” Hunter adds, unconvincingly. “You don’t want me here?”

“I don’t want you guarding me here,” Luz says. “All of this stuff, you being so hung up on Vee and my mom… it’s freaking me out. I don't want them to get hurt.”

“I won’t hurt them,” Hunter says immediately. “I wouldn’t hurt them, not if they’re treating you well – I wouldn’t ever do anything you didn’t want me to do, Luz. I swear.”

“See, that. That's freaking me out.”

His brows draw together.

“You’re sitting here locked in a basement on my behalf,” Luz says, “because you volunteered to be locked in a basement.”

“Okay, well. In my defense. There are some very specific extenuating circumstances right now.”

She waves this aside. “You said you’ve been trying to track me down for months.”

“Of course I have. Anyone with sense would have. Belos was-"

“Yeah, I know. But my mama isn’t Belos.”

Hunter stays quiet and still for a solid minute. Luz actually counts the seconds. His only movement is to press a hand to his eyes, like he’s pushing back a headache, or maybe trying not to cry.

“I’m not trying to be mean,” Luz adds. “I promise you, I'm really, really trying not to hurt your feelings. But you get it, right? It's just… a lot to process.”

“I get it,” he says, with what might be an attempt at a smile. He folds his hands in his lap, surveying her politely and deferentially, like a corporate executive might respond to a CEO. “I'm sorry I've made things harder for you. I didn’t mean to do that.”

“I know,” she says. “It’s okay. I’m really sorry I don't remember.”

“Could be that it's for the best,” Hunter says lightly. “I won't cause your family any trouble, Luz. Promise. It’ll probably be a while until they actually believe that, but in the meantime – you don't need to come down here anymore. I won't pick a fight.”

She has a sudden, overwhelming impulse to fling herself into his arms. Just one more nonsensical reaction, extra proof that something's missing inside her.

“Do you want me to stay away?” she asks.

Once again, Hunter lapses into silence. It's hard to tell whether he’s thinking or just refusing to answer, at least until he counters, “Do you want to remember me?”

“Yes,” Luz says immediately. She doesn't even have to think about it. Without meaning to, she touches her chest, the place that aches every time she reaches out for someone who isn't there. It's been aching since way, way before Hunter stepped onto the Nocedas' porch.

“I want to know,” she explains, “why I miss you so much.”

This, finally, is what makes Hunter break. He buries his face in his hands and lets out a ragged little sob, his shoulders shaking, his breath choked.

Something in Luz wants to wrap her arms around him and snuggle up on the couch and let him cry into her neck. Something in Luz wants to curl up with him under all the blankets in the house and ask him to tell her stories. Something in Luz is suffering physical pain with every elapsed moment in which she doesn’t do that. The desire to hold him edges past want, into need. It hurts.

The rest of her is still loosely gripping a steak knife. And so afraid of sending mixed messages.

“I’ll come back tomorrow, okay?” she says, backing toward the stairs before her instincts can turn traitor. “After I’ve slept. After we’ve both slept. I want – I need you to get some rest tonight. You'll feel better once you do. Okay?”

Hunter grunts in vague acknowledgement. He doesn’t seem interested in discussing his continuing sobs, and Luz is fighting back tears herself, and she doesn't have the strength not to go to him if she cries. So she just climbs the stairs, shutting the door carefully behind her, and she flips the lock closed.

[agentjazzy]

The Evil Dead Dashboard Simulator

🧍‍♂️ groovyhousewares Follow

YES I got my girlfriend a pretty pretty necklace from a gumball machine and when she sees it she's going to give me so so many kisses :)

(411 Notes)

🐟 fishwantmemenwanttokillme Follow

man, fuck tourists, I was heading to my spot when a car came up and honked at us, all friendly like, so me and buddy waved bc there wasn't anyone else there, but then they YELLED at us???? we were just walking?? wtf did we even DO

#i hope the bridge collapses i hope they all DIE #vent

(4,079 Notes)

🎲 kingofstupidbitches Follow

unethical life pro tip: if you overhear your professor talking about their family cabin that they have, and they have open office hours posted, it's your RIGHT to go check that shit out

they're not gonna be there!! they have papers to grade and other shit to deal with!!! free cabin!!!

🌋 thehillsalsohaveanniceass 📛 Follow

op what are you going to do when you roll up and they're just sitting there

🎲 kingofstupidbitches Follow

lmao his ass is NOT going to be in that cabin 😂 he just got back from a vacation with his family or something (dipshit couldn't wait until break) he's supposed to be at his office and he does NOT have the vacation days to be leaving so soon

(151 Notes)

🌹 pressedflowerpetals Follow

fml my older brother asked if I wanted to tag along on a trip to a cabin and I said sure bc it beats staying at home w/ dad

BUT IT'S A COUPLE TRIP

HE'S BRINGING HIS COWORKER/GIRLFRIEND THAT HE DOESN'T SHUT UP ABOUT, HIS FRIEND IS BRINGING HIS GIRLFRIEND, WHYYYY DID THEY INVITE ME

#if i knew i would've said no 😭 #he didn't even invite his Actual best friend #which SUCKS bc then we could've fooled around when no one was paying attention #huh who said that 😳 #cheryl posting

(4 Notes)

📜 anthroapologist 🦀 Follow

haters will hear you scurrying underneath the bowels of your home and freak out like HELLO where else am I supposed to scurry????

(1,288 Notes)

🔮 shessellingseashells Follow

you ever feel like people Immediately forget your name upon meeting you :(

#i might be too high but i don't think any of these people know my full name #i mean I'm Definitely high #and tried moonshine for the first time #but like. really feeling like an outsider rn

(0 Notes)

🎲 kingofstupidbitches Follow

it's so hard being the only chad amongst nerds, like, I GET IT, you're too much of a pussy to investigate the creepy fucking cellar, the LEAST you can do is let me listen to the tapes I found down there, they're cool as fuck

🎲 kingofstupidbitches Follow

okay and now they're all yelling at me bc a stupid tree broke a window right when the tape got good 😑

🎲 kingofstupidbitches Follow

fuck it, here's a recording of the tape, I hope none of you guys are cowards like all my friends apparently are, have fun bc I can't

(206,089 Notes)

💀 theevilacrosstheland Follow

when someone plays your song you can feel that shit in your SOUL catch me coming towards you at 15mph awoken from my eternal slumber if I hear that first note fr

(6,282 Notes)

🔍 peachycraftsection Follow

my boyfriend spent $14 in quarters attempting to get a magnifying glass necklace from one of those gumball machine toy capsules at work bc he knows I LOVE mysteries and detective stories and I need to [redacted] him in the [redacted] right NOW 💖💖💖

(432 Notes)

🌹 pressedflowerpetals Follow

everyone's making out rn which is REAL inconvenient bc there is Absolutely Something Outside

🌹 pressedflowerpetals Follow

should I check it out

🌹 pressedflowerpetals Follow

there's no one online to tell me no so.....

📝 charcoalfingertips Follow

op you haven't posted in an hour are you okay???

🌹 pressedflowerpetals Follow

I'm Irrevocably Changed Now 👍

(104 Notes)

🌹 deadite420 Follow

I'm just a silly goofy guy if I happened to have killed and maimed and bite and stab that's just who I am and how I show love ^_^

(5,724 Notes)

🔮 deadite68 Follow

coyotes are SO right, if youre trapped somewhere or someone grabs ya, just bite your limb off, no hesitation, show superiority, it's not like THEY'RE gonna do it

(2,051 Notes)

🧍‍♂️ groovyhousewares Follow

whhy is there so muchh blood everywhere........

#help #i accidentally kept my mouthh open and blood got in it :((((( #my head hurts sso bad bookcases kept falling on me

(5 Notes)

🔩 deadite883 Follow

heehee i love crawling through pipes and electrical outlets

(207 Notes)

🎶 8tracksarebetterthancassettes Follow

I logged onto Tumblr and wtf why am I following so many people with deadite in their username? is it a reference? did I miss a meme? are we mishapocolypse-ing again?

🌿 dirtissoyummy Follow

I think it might be a virus transmitted by bots but idk I'm too scared to interact

🤡 thespareshemp Follow

okay I investigated to see if it was a bot swarm or people having fun SO

for the first cluster of blogs, all their IPs are logging from the same location, which usually means a lazy bot swarm BUT I went through all their archives and most of them, before changing urls, interacted with one another naturally and stuff, @-ing one another and junk, and they seem to know each other irl

so it's just friends having fun!! and then people joining in on the fun!! feel free to reblog without fear!

#they're all still posting original content so that's kinda a giveaway #even though it's all 'deadite'fied and all #i wonder if theyre doing an arg thing

(1,004 Notes)

🔍 deadite81 Follow

when men are SOAKED with blood 👌😍🥰😘💖🥰🥰💖😍👌😘😘😘💖💖😍

(20,983 Notes)

🤡 deadite6091 Follow

JOIN US JOIN US JOIN US JOIN US JOHN US JOIN US JOIN US JOIN US JOIN US JOIN US

🛏 honkshoomimi Follow

🤡 deadite6091 Follow

You Will Be Dead By Dawn

(5,732 Notes)

🐟 fishwantmemenwanttokillme Follow

man, fuck tourists, I was heading to my spot when a car came up and honked at us, all friendly like, so me and buddy waved bc there wasn't anyone else there, but then they YELLED at us???? we were just walking?? wtf did we even DO

🥐 evilpillsburydoughboy Follow

hey you live near the state line right? can you check the news real quick

🐟 fishwantmemenwanttokillme Follow

uhhhhhhhhh

🐟 fishwantmemenwanttokillme Follow

WHAT DO YOU MEAN THE BRIDGE IS GONE

🐟 fishwantmemenwanttokillme Follow

fml if any of you need me i'm going to lay down in the cold and let the forest take me

(4,079 Notes)

🛏 deadite7390 Follow

if you were to break me down to my pure essence you would be left with pure, unfiltered evil

also grits

mmmmmm grits

(2,561 Notes)

🎥 deadite3023 Follow

falling down the stairs is the most efficient way to go down them :)

(941 Notes)

🎲 deadite69 Follow

y'all ever open the window and AUGH OUGH UGH UGH UGH AAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAA THE AGONIES and then you adjust to the sunlight and you're fine

(8,091 Notes)

🧍‍♂️ groovyhousewares Follow

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA FOR THE LOVE OF GOD SOMEONE HELP ME

(3 Notes)