#too borderline to function

[chronicsymptomsyndrome]

Cannot fucking stand “support needs” labels. They were intended to replace functioning labels but—explain as people might—I still cannot see the true functional difference. I would not rather be called “low support needs” than “high functioning” because one is not more correct than the other. Both are wildly incorrect.

Don’t even get me started on “mild” autism. Unless I hear it from the mouth of an autistic person, I will never believe that a single autistic is having a “mild” experience trying to navigate this world.

[kittykatinabag]

The good news: my blood draw today didn't make me dizzy or make me pass out once I got home like the one I did back in early 2022 did.

The bad news: I feel obligated to go to work tomorrow since I'm feeling about the same amount of tiredness as I usually do.

We'll see if it all hits like a truck when I wake up and don't have energy from food in my body.

[blood-smiles]

𝐇𝐔𝐌𝐀𝐍 𝐆𝐄𝐄𝐊!

𝐘𝐀𝐍𝐃𝐄𝐑𝐄 𝐌𝐀𝐋𝐄 𝐄𝐋𝐅 𝐗 𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐃𝐄𝐑 MDNI - yandere content . yandere is such a human otaku it’s actually pathetic . general creepy content . DEAD DOVE DO NOT EAT.

── .✦ You bit back sobs as you ran through the green forest, calves burning as if fire was licking at your heels. But you couldn’t stop, it would cost you your life.

Bullets zipped past you, impacting against the thick tree bark and leaving deep bullet holes, an angry man shouting behind you.

You dropped the rabbit in your hands long ago, the angry huntsman chasing behind you as if it was the last thing he would do. Only god would know what he would do to you if he caught you.

Your lungs struggled keeping up with the rest of your body as you sprinted away like a wild deer, a bullet implanted deep in your thigh. The adrenaline wouldn’t allow you to feel pain however, as you were focused on survival.

Your brain tingled with warmth, blood clogging up your head. Your body was beginning to lose strength and the pain would begin to tenfold in moments.

Thorns, your barreled into a bush with thorns, you heard the man stop shouting, but the stinging pain in your skin blocked him out completely as you somehow made it through the bush and landed on a patch of pavement.

Pavement? Why would there be pavement in the middle of the forest. You heard the soft gasps of being around you.

You let out a choked sob as your vision began to go black, the last thing you could remember was the patch of blood beneath you and the large warm hands of someone.

“—man…Hu—…an..Human.” Deep.. Why was his voice so deep? So warm and soothing like the hands on your arms.. What? Why are there hands touching you?

You inhaled sharply, snapping your eyes open. Had the hunter caught you? Where were you? 

Your vision blurred as you looked around, body too weak to function correctly, your mind screaming at your body to move—To do something, but your limbs stayed glued to the oddly soft and cushioned.

You took in a large inside of a house with wooden walls, curling into the shape of a tree. The insides lined with books on dated anthropology and various human graphs and.. were those human drawings on the walls?

You saw a male above you, too tall to be a human. And.. Were those pointed ears? Body markings?

What kind of fever induced dream was this?

Was this guy some kind of a human enthusiast? This teetered on borderline creepy and obsessive..

You must have made a funny face because the.. human but not so human shaped male let out an amused exhale through his nose.

“It seems that you are awake.” He paused “Now, little human, do not strain too much, your energy reserve is low.” The deep voice spoke again, bringing a hand close to your face and touching one of your cheeks carefully, with his finger making little swirls on your skin.

“You see, I have used a healing spell of elven origin on you. I found you in a state most dire, I must confess— I was by no means certain that my magicks would be efficacious upon your being. Human organisms are scarce in these lands, and your constitution, complex and delicate as it is, had me fearing I might harm thee furt—“

You couldn’t keep up with his rambling, you could tell he was quite intelligent but.. He really was a chatter box.

Your eyes drifted elsewhere, was this an elf..? You had understood that he was definitely not human, based on his physique and strange knowledge.

“How splendid, I have a human in my possession. A remarkable one too. Those beautiful eyes.. I wonder if most humans have those.. I’m going to note—.”

He looked around your age but his way of speaking and his mannerisms seemed more than a little old fashioned.

His clothing was something else too, it was modest on the top half, well, apart from the boob window, but most his torso was covered, but as you drifted lower, there was only a semi transparent loin cloth covering his genitals. His thighs were strong and his skin was dark and smooth, thigh highs reaching the middle of his thighs. You were pretty sure he was barefoot.

You tried blinking, probably looking like a confused turtle. His hair was very long and a pretty shade of pastel green, part of it covering his left eye, in a thick braid that ran all the way down his back and stopped at his tail bone.

His ears were elongated and droopy, pointing downwards, twitching once in a while, alike to the occasional ear twitches of a fawn.

You couldn’t help but reach a hand upwards towards his head, shaky but steady. Your palm wrapped around his ear, gently tugging at the cartilage.

He paused, eyes widening a little at the sudden intrusion of personal space. You felt his ear twitching under your fingers.

“Little human. What.. is thou doing?” He flushed, abnormally large hands hovering over your hand.

“Humans have natural curiosity, will need to write that down..”

You were sure he could snap your wrist as if it was nothing but a toothpick. You were pleasantly surprised to see that he handled you with extreme care and gentleness.

His slightly calloused hands ghosted over your skin as if the slightest breeze would scuff you. As if you were an antique doll and just the smallest touch of a feather would crack your fragile exterior.

“Ah. I comprehend now. You must be inquiring for sustenance, you must be famished.. Humans must have meals in a timely manner, noted.” He acknowledged, gently picking you up out of the bed and holding you on his hip.

He slung his braid over his shoulder as he carefully took you to what seemed like a kitchen. His chest was very full and comfortable, so you just put your face on it. 

Your hands absentmindedly played with his soft hair, you wondered to yourself when you even got the confidence to touch a stranger so familiarly when he had kidnapped you.

But.. It wasn’t all that bad, he healed you. Only light scars lingered on your skin, and you were sure they would disappear in no time. 

Plus he was very easy on the eyes— AND he was about to feed you! Were you in heaven?

He hummed softly, placing you on the very tall counter (?) made of some wood, the material felt smooth under your skin like a bamboo board. 

He steadied you against a wall, keeping a watchful eye on you just in case you would tilt over and fall off the counter.

You were still so drowsy, blinking slowly and trying to keep the sleep out of your eyes. Were you hallucinating? Because you watched in a daze as ingredients floated around the tall human shaped male in a circle.

He raised a hand once in a while, the needed ingredient drifting to his hand. What you assumed to be a cook book levitated in front of him on a page you couldn’t quite see the contents of.

He glanced at you out of his uncovered eye once in a while checking you were okay. 

You couldn’t keep your head up anymore, your head bobbed in fatigue. Your hands folding over your stomach as your eyes began to shut.

“Dearest specimen, wake up. Food is ready.” A soft voice and the gentle feeling of a hand smoothing your hair roused you.

You blinked the sleep away, you had regained the control over your limbs.

“Fortunately I scavenged a human cook book in the library, now I have vaster knowledge on your human custom—“

You let out a small scream, to which he jumped at. Staring at you as if you had grown a second head then turning his head to the sides as if looking for some invisible threat.

“W-Who— What are you?” You slightly raised your voice, hands shooting up to grab his wrist to hold it over your head, halting the soft patting of your head.

“Susano, Human researcher.” He smiled a little bit, finding that you needed both your hands to lift his one wrist obscenely cute. he could see your forearms shaking under the weight of his arm.

“I’m an elf, and you a human. Pray tell, what is your name, human?” He tilted his head down at you, letting you get a closer look at his face and the white markings on his face, the small white dots and star like details.

“..(Y/N).” You caved in, hands sweating as you release his wrist. It wouldn’t be that bad telling him your name since he healed you and.. did he save you?

“..Did you pick me up from that.. Bazaar?” He nodded, stirring the warm plate of soup in his hand with a wooden spoon.

“I believe that someone was chasing you, isn’t that right?.. A human male with a strange metal rod with a leather handle?” Wow, you had thought you lost the hunter but it’s seems not.

“He landed in the same spot you had, you needn’t worry your pretty little head, (Y/N).” He paused as he caught a glimpse of your worried expression.

Gently blowing a little of the soup with his mouth to cool it down, he gently guided the spoon towards your lips.

“Say ‘aah~’..” The soup smelled so good, you reluctantly opened your mouth, really.. What had gotten into you! Letting a..an elf feed you? A stranger no less!!

Flavors exploded in your mouth, your eyebrows raising in surprise, tasting the food in your mouth a second before swallowing.

“So good..” you mumbled, wiping the corner of your mouth before Susano could get to it first.

He smiled appreciatively before continuing his explanation as he spoon fed you. “That.. Hunter, threatened us with his.. strange weapon. I believe humans call them ‘guns’. He tried to pry you out of my arms but I fear I may have swatted him in the head too hard.”

You paused eating, staring at the elf with something unnameable.

“Ah! No no. Don’t look at me like that.. I only did it for your well being. Humans like him.. truly repulse me.” He grimaced at nothing, bringing up the spoon towards his lips to polish the bowl off.

You watched as his tongue stuck out and slowly licked your drool off. Was it intended to be so erotic? You flushed at little under his watchful gaze.

“Tell me, how old are you?” He asked, flicking his wrist and sending the bowl away.

“..I’m 22.” You shyly answered, scratching an itch on your shoulder. You had read in an old library book that elf’s could be pretty old, the fact not showing very much on their appearances.

“You must be a growing human then!! Ah, how thrilling! Your bones are to age aren’t they?” What a strange question, you nodded with a strange look on your face.

“You look different from the infant humans in books though.. Do you need breast feeding still? Did you lose your mother? You poor thing.. All lost and on your own..” he cooed, coming closer to you and opening his arms to embrace you in a soul crushing hug.

He grabbed your arms while you were restrained by his biceps, a notebook floating into view with a levitating pen.

what seemed to be a measuring device began flying everywhere and measuring all details about you.

“Hm. How interesting, humans heal at an extremely slow rate. How have you managed to survive this long? Your immune system is naught but absolutely easy to trespass and get you ill.” He noted, your ears registering the soft scribbling of a pen on pages.

“Humans are very intelligent beings but.. still so fragile, I could snap your bones with a squeeze of my hand. Are all of you this small? You barely reach my mid section, truly amusing.” He muttered under his breath

“H-Hold on! I do not need breast feeding! I’m not a child! I’m an adult! A full grown adult with an almost fully developed frontal lobe!” You tried to resist his hug, putting your arms in front of you as if your feeble attempt would stop you from being smothered between his chests.

“Hm? Is that so..? Well, surely you still want to be taken care of don’t you? Even if you are an adult, surely you won’t mind more smothering.. Humans are truly such interesting creatures.” He lifted you into the air as if you were lighter than an underweight kitten.

“I have made my mind.” He lifted you to meet his eyes, which was pretty high up, if you guessed he was somewhere around seven feet.

His expression was serious and ice cold. As if he was a drill sergeant about to reprimand you. His hold was gentle but his eyes said something else.

“I am going to keep you here with me, in the village. From now on you are under my care as a defenseless human, adult or not. I took you in and now you are my responsibility.” He announced proudly, before hugging you as close as possible to him, rubbing his cheek against your own face.

“—And you are going to aid me in my human studies, you are one remarkable specimen and too precious to let prance out in the wild. Goddesses, how did you even survive out there? Do you know how dangerous elven forests are?”

You tried grabbing at the long green braid of hair to make him peel himself from you, the body warmth was all consuming and becoming unbearable.

You tried to pull at his hair but he didn’t budge, only smiling and ‘aww’ing at your attempt to make space.

“We shall have a most wonderful time together. ♥”

[flowersforbucky]

oil & water

bucky barnes x reader

word count: 5.8k

prompt - "If you wanted to take your pants off for me so badly, you could have just said so."

shout out to @ellemj for her encouragement with this ♡

warnings/tags: SMUT, vaginal penetration, oral sex (female receving), face sitting, mentions of violence, description of blood & wounds, no use of y/n, reader is afab, hurt/comfort trope, bickering & banter, friends to lovers, forced close proximity trope. 18 plus only!

“Roll your window up,” Bucky snaps at you as he turns down the music you had just put on moments ago. “The last thing we need is someone noticing the blood caked all over the entire right side of your body.” 

As if the lack of functioning AC in the twenty-something year old getaway car (an early 2000’s model Chevy Aveo is inconspicuous, according to Sam) wasn’t stifling enough in the south Georgia summer, the annoyance radiating from the brooding super soldier sitting next to you adds an extra ten degrees. 

Sure, Sam. Inconspicuous is the right word to describe a six foot, two hundred plus pound man with a metal arm cramped behind the driver’s seat of the equivalent to a clown car. Bright fucking cherry red and all. 

“It’s 103 degrees outside.” You glare at him from the passenger seat, where you’re using a tattered handkerchief found in the glove compartment to put pressure on the knife wound on your shoulder. “I’m going to have a heatstroke.” 

“You’re not going to have a heatstroke,” he rolls his eyes at you. “That happening would indicate that I have any amount of good luck.” 

“Ha-ha-ha,” you say under your breath, reluctantly rolling up the manual window with your still bleeding arm. “I got the fucking intel, did I not?” 

You remove the USB drive from its secure location in the cup of your bra and flash it at Bucky. “Though we’ll be lucky if this thing still works after being drowned in boob sweat, since you won’t let me keep the window rolled down.” 

“And nearly got yourself killed in the process.” He grabs the flashdrive from you and grimaces. “We’ll be at the safehouse in less than five minutes, if you can please just refrain from stroking out or bleeding out in the meantime.” 

You glance down at the once white handkerchief clutched in your hand. “I’m not making you any guarantees.” 

You're welcome for saving your ass, by the way, you resist adding. 

Jokes aside, the energy exerted in bringing down over a dozen HYDRA agents in combination with the July heat and the substantial blood loss from your shoulder wound has you feeling woozier by the minute. Factor in a few potentially fractured ribs and a dislocated knee and you're in pretty rough shape. 

As promised, just under five minutes later Bucky parks in front of a small trailer just outside the city limits of Valdosta. It's seen better days, but you don't mind as long as it has semi-functioning air conditioning. 

Bucky is opening your car door and offering you a hand up before you can take in your surroundings. You force yourself out of your seat, ignoring his outstretched hand and attempting to stand on your own, doing your best to ignore the borderline blinding pain radiating from your right knee. 

“Thanks, but I think I can–” 

Your vision goes fuzzy as you stumble forward, right into Bucky's chest. Your hand instinctively clutches the fabric of his shirt as you attempt to regain your balance.

“Let me guess. You're capable of stitching up your own shoulder, too?” 

He gently loops his arm around your waist, slowly walking the two of you to the front door of the trailer. You try to focus on keeping pressure on the gash on your shoulder and not the feeling of his toned body pressed against you. How does he smell so good after hand to hand combat and sitting in that sauna of a car? You're sure you probably smell like a wet diaper that's been left in the sun for–

Bucky opens the door and guides you inside. The interior of the safehouse is surprisingly homey and clean. It's still uncomfortably warm, but offers a nice reprieve from the violent mid-day sun. 

Bucky leads you into the small living space before maneuvering you out of his hold, where you all but collapse onto a suede sofa.

“I guess you do have some amount of good luck, after all,” you mumble, wiping sweat from your forehead with the back of your hand. 

“What are you talking about?” Bucky glances at you from over his shoulder as he flicks on the AC. 

“That happening would indicate that I have any amount of good luck,” you quote his sarcastic comment from the car ride. 

“Ha-ha-ha,” he fake laughs just as you did. He rummages through a few cabinets and drawers of the small kitchen before finding everything he’s searching for, then makes his way back to where you are on the couch. 

“Drink this.” He hands you a bottle of water that you hadn't even noticed him grab. For once you don't object to his instructions, uncapping the bottle and gulping down the contents as quickly as you can. 

“You're not having a heatstroke,” he assures you. “But you are going to have to let me stitch up this crater on your shoulder and pop your knee back into place.” 

You sit forward, removing the now fully soaked cloth that you've been holding to your shoulder for the last half hour. 

Bucky winces at the sight of it, handing you a dishrag before opening a bottle of rubbing alcohol. “You might want to bite down on–” 

“I know the drill.” You sigh before putting the rag between your teeth. 

He hesitates for a moment before pouring the clear liquid over the wound. You groan against the rag, your eyes squint shut in pain. You've had your fair share of broken bones and black eyes working in this field, but you don't think you'll ever get used to the pain of getting stitches without the comforts of saline solution and anesthesia.

“I'm sorry, sweetheart,” he murmurs, dabbing the cut dry with a paper towel. 

Your heart skips a beat at the nickname. “It's part of the job. I've come out of missions worse than this before,” you shrug, squeezing the dish rag he gave you until your knuckles go white as he makes the first incision. 

“Never because of me.” 

You glance at him, taken aback by the sudden shift in his tone. His gaze doesn't leave the thread and needle that he's using to close up the gash on your arm - his normally plump pout set into a hard line. 

“You know this isn't your fault, right?” You keep your eyes locked on him. “I saw that guy coming at you out of nowhere and I panicked. I wasn't watching my own back. That's my fault, not yours,” you say earnestly. 

“If you say so.” He glances up for a split second, giving you a tight-lipped smile that doesn't reach his eyes. 

“Is that why you've been such a grouch? You're blaming yourself for me not being careful enough?” 

“Maybe,” he admits quietly. “Or maybe I just hate seeing you covered in blood for any reason.” 

You freeze at the bluntness of his words. You and Bucky have been partners on more missions than you could count at this point - you know that he would have done the same for you if the situation had been reversed; in fact, there had been times where he had taken the brunt of the fight in order to protect you. 

All of those instances suddenly flash through your mind. 

The time he used himself as a human shield when there was a bomb set off during a recon mission at a warehouse in Tokyo. Or when he football tackled you out of the direct line of an incoming dagger during an operation in Portland. Not to mention the time he left a job all the way in Prague unfinished because he merely suspected you had a concussion. 

You had always chalked it up to “that’s what partners do,” but the pained expression on his face as he refuses to meet your eyes has you questioning if there could possibly be more to it. 

No. You’re his partner. He’d do the same for anyone else. He wouldn’t want to see anyone on his team covered in blood if he could prevent it. 

The two of you sit in a thick silence while he finishes stitching you up. 

“There,” he says at last, clipping the excess suture thread with scissors. “Not quite as good as your stitch work, but I think it’ll hold you together.” His voice isn’t as strained as it was moments ago, though you can't help but notice it sounds forced. 

“Thank you,” you tell him, ignoring the way your cheeks warmed the tiniest bit at his compliment. “Now for the really fun part,” you add, staring at your throbbing knee. 

“You’re in luck,” he says, perking up a bit. “I’ve popped my own knees back into place an embarrassing amount of times, so this should be a breeze.” He repositions himself to have better access to your leg, moving off the couch to perch on the edge of the coffee table in front of you. You attempt to pull the tight fabric of your tactical pants up enough to give him unhindered access to your knee, but it’s too restrictive, immediately causing you to wince in pain. 

“Fuck,” you huff. “I’m going to have to take these off.” You pop the button at the top of your pants and begin to push them down your thighs before insecurity can get the better of you. You try not to think about the fact that Bucky's never seen you in such little clothing - pants now pushed down to your calves, only your underwear and the bra and thin tank top you wore underneath the tactical vest that you took off as soon as you were in the safety of the getaway car left to cover you. 

Hesitation flashes across Bucky’s face for a brief moment before he scoots over slightly, moving directly in front of you so that he can position his hands on either side of your kneecap. You’re painfully aware of the polar opposite feeling of his right and left hand - his flesh hand is warm and so much softer than you’d expect, his metal one icy and smooth. You aren’t sure which causes the visible goosebumps that now litter your skin.

Maybe it’s not his touch at all. Maybe it’s the way his eyes haven’t left your thighs since you exposed them.

Maybe it’s the fact that if you parted your legs just a few inches, he’d be nestled between them. 

Chill out, you berate yourself. He's just relocating your knee for Christ's sake. 

“On the count of three,” he starts and you brace yourself. “One, two–” 

“MOTHERFUCKER.” You yell out at the same moment your knee creates a loud cracking noise that echoes off the walls of the small trailer. “You said count of three!” 

“Would that really have made it less painful?” He shrugs, but doesn't move from where his knees brush against yours. “I think what you mean to say is “thank you, Bucky, you're a lifesaver and I'm now in your debt.” 

“In your fuckin’ dreams,” you scoff. “I'm going to wash all of this blood and sweat off of me.” You move to push yourself off of the couch, tugging your pants back up as you stand. You can feel his eyes trail up your body as you do, making you feel woozy all over again. You turn away from him, heading towards the hallway that the bathroom is likely located down. 

“I could have done that through your pants, by the way.” 

You freeze mid-step, glancing back at him over your shoulder. “What do you mean?” You snap at him. 

“Your knee,” he clarifies, a hint of undeniable mischief in his expression. “I could have popped your knee back into place through your pants. If you wanted to take your pants off for me so badly, you could have just said so.” 

Just when you thought the safehouse was starting to cool down, your entire body heats up a thousand degrees. You're racking your brain trying to think of a retort when Bucky's ringtone starts blaring from the kitchen countertop. He ignores it, his eyes not leaving yours for what feels like an eternity. 

You finally break the silence. “That's most likely Sam wanting to make sure we're not dead. Should probably answer it.” 

“Probably should,” he smirks, and at last gets up from the coffee table to answer the phone.

You scurry the rest of the way to the bathroom before he can look back at you again, ignoring the sharp pains that radiate from your ribcage and the now dull ache that spreads from your knee. 

You turn the water to cold, and don't get out until you've started to shiver. 

— — — — — 

When you exit the bathroom and step back into the connected bedroom in only a towel, you see that Bucky has done you the kindness of bringing in the bags that had been stored in the backseat of the getaway car. 

You dig through your backpack, pulling out a fresh t-shirt and pair of leggings. From the next room, you can smell the aroma of whatever non-perishable food that Bucky has scrounged together. Despite your growing hunger pains, you take your sweet time combing through your freshly rinsed hair. The thought of looking Bucky in the eye after your last interaction nearly makes you lose your appetite. 

What was I thinking? Oh right, I wasn't thinking at all, otherwise I wouldn't have just pushed my fucking pants down right in front of–

“Your five course dinner is getting cold.” Bucky raps his fingers against the bedroom door, startling you from your thoughts. 

“Be right there,” you call back to him, swiping some deodorant under your arms. You take a glance at yourself in the bedroom’s small vanity mirror and immediately wish that you hadn't – you're cleaner than you were by miles, at least no longer covered in your own blood as well as the blood of HYDRA agents – but your cheekbone is lightly bruised, there's a slit on your bottom lip, and the bags under your eyes make it look like you haven't had a decent night's sleep in a month. 

You take a deep breath and then walk back to the one room that makes up the kitchen, dining area and living room. 

“Beef or shrimp ramen?” Bucky asks as you climb onto one of the barstools on the opposite side of the counter from where he's standing. 

“Hm,” you contemplate, not meeting his stare and instead occupying yourself with another bottle of water that he's placed where you now sit. 

Fucker probably wouldn't fluster me so bad if he wasn't being so damn thoughtful.

“I'll go with shrimp,” you answer, remembering that beef is his favorite.

He slides the bowl across the counter and then hands you a fork. You finally get the nerve to look up and meet his stare that feels as if it weighs two tons. 

“So, what did Sam say?” You try to go for light conversation, twisting the fork around your noodles. “Are we free to get out of here once it's dark out?” 

“Not…quite,” he hesitates, now seeming particularly interested in his own food. “The car battery kind of died.” 

“What do you mean the car battery kind of died?” 

“While you were in the shower, I tried to move the car behind the house so that anyone driving by wouldn't immediately know that someone's here. It started fine, but as I was driving it around back it just.. stopped. Had to push it the rest of the way.” 

You let out a dramatic groan as he continues. 

“I called Sam again and he said the earliest they can send someone to get us is in the morning.” 

“Well,” you exhale, blowing a raspberry with your lips. “We can flip a coin to see who gets the bed?” You ask lightheartedly. This isn’t the first time that you and Bucky have had an overnight mission together, but it is the first overnight mission where the two of you haven’t had your own motel rooms or at least a safehouse with two beds.

He looks at you quizzically, furrowing his eyebrows. “You really think there’s a chance of me making you sleep on the couch? In your condition?” 

“My condition?” you laugh. “I’ve got a few stitches, I’m not dying of cancer.” 

“You don’t think I’ve noticed the way it’s uncomfortable for you to inhale and exhale? You’ve probably got a couple fractured ribs with the way you landed on that cement. If not fractured, then at least heavily bruised. You’re not sleeping on the couch.” 

Between his tone and the look on his face, you know it isn’t up for debate. You throw your hands up in faux surrender. 

“Serving me instant ramen and letting me take the king sized bed?” you say teasingly. “Keep it up and I'm going to think that you're soft on me.” 

His gaze on you is heavy as he takes a long sip of water from his own bottle. “Wouldn't that be a shame?” 

— — — — — 

The rest of the afternoon is spent with you lounging in bed, resting your injuries and reading some cheesy western romance novel that you found in the drawer of the bedside table. 

Bucky keeps to the living room, where you hear a violent sounding movie playing from a TV that has to be as old as you are. 

You tell yourself that you're staying in the bedroom because you need to take it easy and relax, but truthfully you feel suffocated by the tension that has been escalating between you and Bucky since you arrived here. 

A certain level of tension had always been there, you knew deep down. From the first time the two of you met almost two years ago. 

Bucky had been formally introduced to the team just a few weeks prior, and it was his first official mission. An undercover mission - just the two of you. 

Posing as an engaged couple at a party thrown at the estate of a notorious crime boss in order to obtain intel. Pretty straight forward - it was far from your first undercover mission. And then it was sprung on you at the last minute that the man who you'd only met once, less than a month ago, was to be your fiancé for the evening. 

The bastard even went as far as to slip the fake engagement ring on your finger himself. 

“Natasha picked this out. She said it needed to be a princess cut, because that's what you like.” 

You chuckled as he went to slide the rock onto your ring finger. “What? You're not going to get down on one knee?” 

The mission went shockingly smooth, you and Bucky were in and out with the needed intel in just a few hours. But those few hours replayed in the back of your mind more often than you care to admit. 

The way his arm stayed wrapped securely around your shoulder or waist the entire hour that you mingled as guests. How he pulled you into a slow dance to discuss the plan for sneaking into the study on an off-limits floor. The musky smell of his aftershave and the spearmint on his breath. 

And especially the way he referred to you as his “bride” when introducing yourselves to people, on more than one occasion throughout the night. 

“And who is this absolutely beautiful young woman on your arm?” an elderly man with eye boogers and booze on his breath asks Bucky. 

“This is my bride,” Bucky introduces you, giving him your undercover name. “She is beautiful, isn’t she? Most beautiful woman here, if I do say so myself.” 

Saying that Bucky played his part well that night would have been an understatement. Saying that he played his part scarily well would be a more accurate assertion. 

After grabbing the intel and fleeing the scene, neither of you ever mentioned that mission again. Not the lingering touches, smoldering stares - not even the way he shoved you up against the wall of a corridor, cupped your face in his large hands, and kissed you senseless for half a minute when you came close to getting caught sneaking into the private office by security at the very end of the evening. 

“Do you think that was believable?” he asks nervously, his hands still clutching your face as he looks around the hallway for any lingering guards. 

“Ye-yeah,” you stutter breathily. “As believable as it possibly could be.” 

There’s a light knock on the partially open bedroom door that draws you back to the reality of the safehouse. You realize that you’ve been staring at the same paragraph in your book for the last half hour. 

"Yeah?” you answer, bringing yourself to a sitting position. 

Bucky peaks his head around the door, opening it further so that you can see what he is carrying. 

“I’m tired of watching old James Bond movies,” he sighs, glancing between you and the stack of board games in his arms. “I found these in the TV stand.” 

“I kicked your ass in Battleship last time we played,” you remind him. “Do you really want a rematch of that?” 

“How about we make a bet?”

— — — — — 

Half an hour later, you've eaten your own words, now owing Bucky a large meat lovers pizza from his favorite parlor in Brooklyn and two weeks worth of laundry duty when you return to the compound. 

“How'd you get so good?” you demand as he makes the winning attack. “You were so lame at this last time.” 

“Maybe I just let you win last time,” he shrugs with a shit-eating grin. 

You just shake your head in defeat, wincing as you stand up from where you had been playing on the shag area rug in the living room. 

“No,” you declare firmly. “No, I don't believe that. There's no way you'd willingly let me win anything. I've learned that the hard way during hand to hand combat training way too many times.”  

Bucky belly laughs from where he still sits on the floor, his gaze trailing after you. 

You walk over to where he has piled the board games on the coffee table, trying to find something you were confident you could win. 

Monopoly isn't fun with only two players, Risk takes too long — 

Your eyes lock onto a card game peeking out from underneath the Sorry! box. 

You pick it up, turning back to face him with a growing smile on your face.

“Absolutely not,” he says firmly. “I'm over a hundred years old–” 

“What does age have to do with truth or dare?!” You exclaim, sitting back down on the floor once more. 

“I haven't been roped into a game of truth or dare since the 1930's,” he groans. 

“Scared of what you might have to do?” You tease, unboxing the cards. “Or what you might have to admit?” 

He stares at you for a long moment, pursing his lips. The disapproval doesn't quite reach his eyes - you can tell by the way they gleam that he's going to cave. 

“Maybe a bit of both,” he admits. He tousles his fingers through his hair and moves to cross his legs at the ankles. “Fine,” he relents. “One game.” 

You squeal like a kid in a candy store as you shuffle the deck of cards and lay them in a stack between you. 

“Elders first,” you motion to the pile. 

He rolls his eyes, drawing one from the top – dare. 

“Smell another player's armpit,” he deadpans. You're instantly thankful that you remembered to cram a stick of deodorant into your backpack when packing for the mission. 

“Well?” You lift up your arm. “I'm the only other player here and it's not going to sniff itself.” 

Bucky sighs, leaning across the game to put his nose directly next to the opening of your t-shirt sleeve. “Lavender,” he observes after inhaling, giving you an approving nod. “As far as dares go, I got lucky.” 

“Lucky that I showered earlier,” you mumble as you draw your turn, your cheeks warming slightly. 

Truth. 

“Who was your last kiss with and what was it like?” 

Your heart plummets to your stomach as you read the words aloud. Bucky waits impatiently as you fiddle with the piece of paper in your hands. 

“Might I remind you, you are the one who wanted to play this game so desp–” 

You hold up a finger and make a shushing sound, silencing him as he grins menacingly. 

“My last kiss was almost two years ago,” you answer honestly, looking back down at the card to avoid his stare. He can always tell when you're lying, why even try? 

“With a man I barely knew,” you continue. “We had to pretend to be in love for the evening. It was a shockingly easy thing to do. When he pushed me up against a wall and kissed me as a distraction to security guards, I had to remind myself that it was an act. We never spoke about it again. But now two years later, I'm telling him that I think of that kiss often.” 

When you finally look up, you can't decipher the look on his face. Long gone is the mischievous grin from just moments ago, in its place is.. shock? Perplexity? 

“And why exactly have you not kissed anyone else since then?” He asks quietly. 

“Nope,” you say, popping your lips on the p. “That's not how the game works, you don't get to add sub-questions.” 

His eyes don't leave yours as he draws his next card.

His turn for truth. He glances down to read his question.

“Have you ever wanted to have sex with any of the players?” 

Forget your cheeks feeling warm - your entire body feels like it's on fire as you wait for him to answer. 

He chuckles, tossing the card on top of the other two that had already been picked. 

“Every goddamn day since I kissed her almost two years ago.” 

You aren't sure which one of you snaps first. You lunge forward at the same moment that he's leaning across the splay of cards to grasp your face in his hands just like he did in that corridor two years ago. The same hint of spearmint on his breath, a bit more stubble on his jaw, and a sense of desperation that wasn't there before. 

He moves his hands to your lower back, pulling you flush against him as you both sit on your knees. Your own hands find the hem of his shirt, your fingers dancing across the skin of his waistline. 

“I asked you why you haven't kissed anyone since we last kissed,” he murmurs against your lips when he pulls away, both of you breathless. “You don't have to answer, but that..” his mouth moves to the side of your throat where he trails open-mouth kisses across the sensitive flesh of your pulse point. 

“That's why I haven't kissed anyone else, either.” 

A pathetic, small moan escapes past your lips at his admission. In a split second decision, you take control. You place your hands across his chest, pushing him down onto the shag rug that you'd been playing games on just moments ago. He lets himself fall back, pulling you with him. 

You straddle him, positioning yourself directly on his already evident erection. You drag yourself forwards, and then backwards, desperate for friction - he groans beneath you, jutting upwards. 

The fabric of your pants between you feels like a prison. 

You scoot back a few inches - just far enough to give yourself enough room to unbutton his jeans. 

“Wait, wait,” he stops you as you're about to begin pulling down his pants and underwear. You freeze, petrified that you've crossed a line– 

“I haven't stopped thinking about having your thighs wrapped around my head since I saw them earlier,” he says as he hooks his hands around them and hauls you up to his chest. “Take these off and sit on my face.” He tugs on the waistline of your leggings. 

“If you wanted me to take my pants off for you so badly, you could have just said so,” you echo his earlier teasing. 

“I'm asking you now, sweetheart,” his voice has a strained edge to it. “Don't make me beg.” 

Though the notion of him begging has wetness pooling down your thighs, you're too eager to entertain it. 

You stand up, directly above him as he keeps his position on the floor. You shimmy your leggings down your thighs, this time completely removing them and tossing them somewhere behind you. He tugs his t-shirt over his head and throws it in the general direction of your discarded pants. 

With you still standing above him, he leans forward so that his face brushes against the inside of your thighs. He brings his hands to the band of your underwear, hooking his fingers and slowly pulling them down until they're at your ankles. 

You slip them off as he lays back down on the floor. A bit apprehensively, you sit so that your bare pussy is against his hard chest. 

“Just stop me if it's too uncomfortable or if you can't breathe or any–” 

He cuts you off by all but picking you up and hauling you up to his face.

“I wouldn't worry about that,” his voice vibrates against the flesh of your innermost thighs. He tugs you down just one more inch so that his mouth makes contact with your center. 

You gasp out in pleasure as his tongue begins exploring your folds. There's no restraint about it - he sets a brutal pace, alternating between fucking his tongue into your cunt and sucking on your clit. 

You're writhing above him, grinding your pussy against his mouth. You go to squeeze your breasts, pulling your t-shirt off when you realize it's the one clothing article you've yet to shed. 

When he realizes that you're now completely naked above him, he lets out an animalistic groan as he laps a thick lick up your center. 

The vibration, in addition to him now squeezing your ass with enough pressure that he's bound to leave behind fingertip shaped bruises, is enough to send you spiraling to your climax. 

You involuntarily squeeze your thighs around his cheeks, riding out your orgasm as he continues to wrap his lips around your throbbing clitoris. 

You go still for a moment, aside from your heaving chest, as you come back down to earth. 

You climb off of him, your jellified legs nearly causing you to collapse onto the floor next to him. 

He props himself up with one arm, looking down at you. His face is thoroughly glistening with your juices. 

You can't help but think he's never looked hotter. 

A proud grin begins to form across his features as you pull him down to you by the back of his neck. 

You kiss him with as much feverency as you can muster in your post orgasm haze, tasting the semi-sweet tang of your come on his lips and tongue. 

“It's your turn to get these off,” you demand, drawing back from the kiss to pull at the waistband of his pants. 

“Can I at least take you to the comfy bed before this goes any further?” he bargains. “You are still recovering from multiple injuries, you know.” 

“I can assure you that I've never felt better.” But you let him have his way. He stands before picking you up, lifting you so that you can wrap your legs securely around his midsection. His large hands planted firmly on your ass, he walks the short distance to the bedroom. Your nipples pebble as they press against his bare chest. 

He gently places you on top of the comforter before standing back, at last removing his jeans and boxers. His cock springs forward, slapping against his lower belly. 

Your mouth goes dry at the sight. If it had been a long time since you had been kissed, it had been even longer since you had been fucked. 

He crawls onto the bed, hovering above where you lay. You automatically open your legs to allow him between them. 

His eyes rake up and down your body, pausing on your breasts. 

"You're goddamn stunning.” 

Before you can respond, he's leaning down to capture one of your nipples in his mouth. Rolling it between his teeth, the sensation has you arching your back into his touch. You can feel the tip of his cock jutting against your core - teasing but not yet entering. 

He starts to line himself up at your hole, his eyes locking onto yours as he pumps himself in his hand. He brings his lips down to yours, his tongue slipping into your mouth at the same moment he nudges his tip past your entrance. 

There's a blissful burn as he cautiously buries himself inside you - you're simultaneously thankful that he's going slow and needing him balls deep. He pushes in, inch by inch, until you're filled to the hilt. When he can't get any deeper, he pulls back - and slams back into you all at once. 

You swear you can feel him in your stomach. You look down at where your bodies connect, the sight of him sliding in and out of you enough to have you on the edge of climaxing again already. 

He brings his metal hand to knead your breast. 

"Do you have any idea how many times I've pictured having you under me like this?” He coos. You gyrate your hips to meet his thrusts, causing his eyes to roll back into his head. 

“How many times I've thought about what your little moans would sound like?” 

Your only answer is a gutteral moan of his name as you wrap your arms around him and dig your nails into the flesh of his back. 

“Your pussy feels even more like heaven than I imagined it would.” 

His praises send you over the edge - you're coming for a second time, clenching around him as his thrusts grow messy. He fucks you through your orgasm before he loses control himself, burying his face in the curve of your neck as he spills into you. 

With you still panting and limp beneath him,  his movements gradually come to a stop but he doesn't pull out - instead he flips you to your side and maneuvers himself into a spooning position behind you. 

He peppers soft kisses along the skin of your shoulder, being careful to avoid your stitches, and relaxes beside you. 

“Remind me to dislocate my knee more often,” you joke, processing everything that just happened. 

He snorts, then tilts your head up to meet his gaze. “Remind me to play truth or dare with you more often.” He captures your lips in his, this kiss slower than any of the ones before. 

“I guess it would be weird to make you do my laundry for two weeks now, huh?” He teases, earning a laugh from you.

“You do still owe me a pizza, but I'll be happy to share it with you.” 

♡♡♡♡♡

my masterlist

[mariasont]

Casualties Of Control - A.H

caught in a moment of panic, you freeze, but hotch guides your next moves, revealing just how comforting surrendering control can be

pairings: aaron hotchner x sweetheart!reader warnings: age gap, power imbalance, sexual tension, anxiety/self-doubt galore, gun violence, near-death experience, hurt/comfort, depictions of trauma responses, authority kink, themes of submission and control, brief mention of parental emotional neglect wc: 3k request: here

You were starting to think someone should stage an intervention, maybe Garcia or JJ, because this is getting borderline pathetic. More specifically, you, are getting borderline pathetic.

The second Hotch speaks, reality melts into background noise, and you’re zeroed in on the column of his throat, the subtle movement of muscle beneath perfectly pressed shirt collars.

You’re standing in the middle of a crime scene, dirt kicking up around your sensible shoes, yet all you can think about is the shift of tension in his jaw. Tighten, loosen, swallow — rinse and repeat. It’s mortifying, really, this fixation.

You wonder why it happens or if he even realizes he’s doing it. Maybe it’s an unconscious reflex, his overwhelming need for control compressed into a single, visible place. Authority, responsibility, and his entire leadership style condensed into that twitch. It’d be poetic if it wasn’t so distracting.

And really, truly, genuinely, you need to pull yourself together because Morgan is giving you a side-eye that suggests he’s not only noticed your gawking, but worse, has developed several theories about it.

Hotch’s instructions spill out rapid fire, and you’re halfway to zoning out, catching snippets — Morgan, perimeter. Reid, coordinate with local PD. 

You force yourself to tune in just in time to realize you’ve missed most of what he’s saying, something vaguely alarming about the missing witness slipping past your ears. When Hotch says your name, you flinch, probably visibly, and snap upright, trying (likely failing spectacularly) to look alert.

“You’re with me.”

And then he’s turning, moving, and naturally, instinctively, you fall into step beside him.

It’s fine, you reason, it’s not that you mind. You really don’t. Still, there’s a small part of you, buried beneath layers of admiration and self-doubt, that’s starting to twitch with impatience. You’ve been here for five cases now and you assumed by this point you’d graduate from perpetual trainee shadow to, well, anything else.

You remember Reid telling you he earned independence fairly quickly, and Morgan practically started the job fully formed. But you’re still following dutifully in Hotch’s shadow, like a duckling too nervous to swim on its own. Is it him? Is it you? Is there some glaring flaw he sees, something that screams liability, too-green-to-function-alone? You bite the inside of your cheek, silencing your insecurities before they start screaming louder.

You’re practically speed-walking at this point, struggling to match Hotch’s long strides as the sun cooks your brain into a scrambled mush.

Your fingertips shield your eyes, squinting hard against the glare, cursing your impulsiveness — rushing out this morning after the team like a lovesick intern, leaving behind basic necessities like water. Rookie mistake. You’ll be dehydrated and delirious by noon, hallucinating your own incompetence in vivid detail.

Hotch doesn't even spare you a sidelong glance your way when he thrusts a water bottle toward you, eyes still scanning the horizon, speaking into his radio.

You stare dumbly at it for a second, and he must sense your confusion, because he tacks on, “You always forget to grab one. Drink.”

It sounds more gentle chiding than reprimand, but your face warms all the same.

The moment the bottle touches your lips, your body moves on autopilot, obeying Hotch’s casual command like it’s ingrained in your DNA. You’re pretty sure that’s concerning, how effortlessly you bend to his wishes, but introspection on that front can wait, especially since you’re burning alive under more than just the summer heat.

Without conscious thought, you offer the bottle back to him. 

Hotch pauses mid-sentence, the radio chatter fading momentarily as he eyes the bottle in mild confusion. 

But he takes it, pressing his mouth exactly where yours had been just seconds ago.

The simple action triggers a cascade of horribly inappropriate thoughts — mostly involving other, much less professional ways you’d rather be sharing space with his lips. Your imagination provides a cinematic experience of saliva exchange methods that have absolutely nothing to do with staying hydrated.

Wonderful. 

Your brain officially needs adult supervision.

Hotch, unfortunately observant, asks immediately, “You okay?”

“Fine!” Your voice pitches too high. Words tumble recklessly from your lips, an avalanche of rational-sounding nonsense designed solely to bury the fact that you’ve gone and made this weird. “Actually, if the unsub abducted the witness from the parking lot instead of her home, doesn’t that significantly change the risk factor? Public place, daylight — it would require confidence. That implies either past experiences or familiarity with the location —,”

You’re practically tripping over your own tongue, but your reasoning sounds airtight, thankfully. Because while your mouth may be spewing perfectly acceptable analysis, your brain is still utterly fixated on Hotch’s lips and their newly established indirect intimacy. 

Please let him not notice that.

Hotch considers your point, oblivious to your internal meltdown — or mercifully pretending to be. “That’s a good point.”

You’re in said parking lot before you realize it, baking on the blacktop, the car ride here an absolute blank.

It’s so hot your shoes practically fuse with the pavement, sticking with every step. Hastily shoving sunglasses onto your nose provides some mercy, but it does little to shield you from the full-body assault of sunlight, droplets of sweat quickly making trails down your collarbones. 

Reid would undoubtedly be rattling off something about albedo, thermal something-or-other, or some complicated explanation he pulled from a random academic paper. You simply classify it as outrageously, freakishly hot.

Hotch stands near the SUV, jacket discarded in favor of rolled-up sleeves. 

You discreetly pop open two buttons at your collar, self-consciousness momentarily forgotten in your bid for self-preservation, fingers grazing sweaty skin. 

Hotch’s mild, pointed throat-clear pulls your attention sharply, and your hands fall innocently back to your sides. 

He returns his gaze to the lot, brow furrowed in thought as he begins, “So, our unsub takes a woman from a busy parking lot in broad daylight, and nobody notices. What’s your read on that?”

You swallow painfully.

“Either he’s invisible, or everyone else is oblivious. Maybe both. More realistically, he’s non-threatening — at least initially. Approachable, trustworthy enough to not raise any red flags.”

His eyes flicker to the security cameras. “The unsub knew enough to pick a blind spot and a busy hour. Probably wasn’t his first time.”

“Right,” you agree. “Plus, no personal items were left behind, her keys, phone, everything gone with her. She went willingly at first.”

“Or he was convincing enough to make it appear that way,” Hotch adds.

Sweat trickles annoyingly down your spine, pooling uncomfortably between your shoulder blades. You glance sideways at Hotch, baffled by how unfazed he seems, looking like he’s casually waiting in a nice, breezy room rather than cooking alive in this inferno masquerading as a parking lot.

“I want you to check the eastern side, see if local PD missed anything.”

There’s a flash of doubt, a brief impulse to argue that maybe your efforts would be better spent elsewhere. A tiny voice in the back of your mind suggests hesitantly that maybe you’d earn his respect if, just once, you challenged his orders instead of quietly complying. But that impulse quickly wilts under the addictive rush you feel in gaining his approval.

It’s uncomfortable to admit, even privately, that you like the certainty of following his lead. You trust his judgment implicitly, which is a dangerous revelation you haven’t been able to shake. But even as the realization unsettles you, you’re already heading toward the eastern side, willingly and undeniably eager to please.

You’ve built your whole identity around color-coded calendars, neatly ordered lists, and near-pathological insistence on control. Yet, somehow, here you are, feeling embarrassingly grateful, borderline euphoric, simply because Aaron Hotchner told you exactly where to stand. You’ve either hit rock bottom or stumbled onto a whole new level of pathetic, jury’s still out. Deep down, you suspect you should be significantly more concerned about your state of mind than you actually are.

After a fruitless couple of hours spent cooking yourself alive on the asphalt, Hotch finally takes mercy on you, shepherding you back into the blessed relief of the artificially cooled paradise of the station.

You have a complicated relationship with local police stations. Sure, they’re usually air-conditioned, blessedly cool havens compared to the heat simmering outside. But then again, they’re always saturated with that same smell of charred coffee and day-old donuts. This station, particularly, is no exception. 

You push aside your petty complaints, focusing instead on Hotch’s directive to pair up with Prentiss and sift through alibis the local PD has halfheartedly checked.

You had gotten straight to work, ostensibly because it was necessary but mostly to distract yourself from the soul-crushing awareness Emily’s presence always inspired. She’d always been calm, collected, entirely too put-together, a combination that paradoxically eased your mind while also amplifying every self-conscious insecurity you owned.

You vividly recall your first few interactions with her, particularly the time she’d gently pointed out you’d been reading the map upside-down for five solid minutes.

The memory makes you cringe even now, but Emily had laughed with you, not at you, instantly easing your embarrassment. From the start, she’d balanced teasing and patience, correcting your mistakes without ever making you feel incompetent. It only deepened your appreciation, and, if you were being honest, your mild hero-worship of her.

Your nostalgic reverie about Emily implodes instantly, ruthlessly obliterated by the sudden deafening crack of gunfire. 

The room seems to tumble sideways, your equilibrium evaporation, replaced by sickening vertigo. 

The bullet glimmers so close to your temple that it nudges your hair, a grotesque mockery of intimacy. 

Your mind barely has time to piece together what’s happened before the shouting starts, voices exploding around you. In a dizzy blur, uniforms flood the space, tackling the unsub to the ground.

You stare forward, dazed, your senses dialed down to a murmur as if you’ve sunken underwater without realizing it. Emily materializes in front of you, blurred at first, then rapidly sharpening into focus, her lips moving quickly, shaping syllables you can’t fully grasp. Her face reflects fierce urgency, her stance instinctively protective, something that vaguely registers, but your thoughts stay stubbornly cloudly, lost somewhere between numb disbelief and fragmented comprehension.

Reality rushes back in as Emily’s voice finally floods your ears, her gaze anxiously probing yours for confirmation that you’re alright.

“I’m fine,” you reassure quickly, the words steady enough that they almost convince even you. “What do you need me to do?”

How could you freeze like that?

Breathe in. Count to three. Exhale slowly. You push the panic bubbling up into a box neatly stored behind well-worn barriers of composure. Control slides gracefully back into position, a transparent illusion spun from willpower alone. 

Your mother had been your first and relentless instructor, composure valued above tenderness, flawlessness demanded before comfort was ever considered. Beneath perfectly pinned-up hair and practiced smiles, she’d etched these lessons deeply. You’ve always been made from shards, a careful mosaic of concealed fractures, sewn together by unsaid apologies and quiet disappointments.

You learned early on that the safest place was behind a perfected facade.

She places a hand on your arm. “Maybe you should sit down for a minute.”

“Really, Em, I’m okay,” you assure her quickly. It fits perfectly, even if it feels painfully dishonest now. “Just tell me what you need next.”

You feel your reassurance wobbling like a well-used record, repetitive and empty, but you don’t trust yourself to say anything else. If you speak too openly, you risk Emily seeing the brittleness beneath your words, the terrifying image branded behind your eyes — your body lying cold, lifeless on the station floor, if you had just been one inch to the left. Your father would’ve gotten that call, your desk would’ve been quietly emptied, and your entire life would’ve ended mid-sentence. 

Hotch moves purposefully into your line of sight.

Your attention snags on the empty space where Emily had just stood. You hadn’t noticed her leaving, but that’s typical — Hotch tends to clear the space around you, intentional or not, whenever he addresses you directly. You wonder briefly if it’s because he senses your tendency to falter under scrutiny, or perhaps because he expects you to embarrass yourself again.

How long has he been standing there, waiting patiently for your response?

“Sorry,” you say quickly, refocusing on his face. “Could you repeat that?”

His voice is steady as he repeats, more gently this time, “I asked if you’re hurt.”

“No.”

You glance down quickly immediately afterward. You’re not even sure that’s true — had you actually checked, or had the adrenaline blocked out any injuries? You scan yourself quickly, a little unsure, a lot overwhelmed. Nothing seems wrong, at least nothing visible, but then your attention flits anxiously around the room, eyes instinctively looking for the unsub.

They tackled him, right? So where did they take him afterward — was he cuffed, detained, secured? More importantly, did they figure out why he barged in and opened fire? 

Hotch’s gaze sweeps quickly over you before his hands are gently tipping your head, his fingertips lightly exploring the place where the bullet almost found its mark. Warm fingers carefully part your hair, brushing just above your ear, and suddenly, you’re painfully aware of how tender he’s being, despite everything.

“Just to be safe, the EMTs will check you out,” he says, confident you’re unharmed but cautious nonetheless.

You nod, but you know exactly what he’s thinking, exactly what he must have seen. You were careless, oblivious — frozen solid at the worst possible moment. You’d slipped, and it almost cost everything. Your incompetence nearly ended your life, it could’ve endangered Emily, Hotch, the team. 

How could he trust you after this? Shame blooms hotly, choking your breath, because you know better.

This job doesn’t allow second chances, and you nearly used yours up.

“I’ll just — let me find Emily, then we can —,”

“You’re not doing anything right now.” Hotch’s interruption is firm, an immovable wall you know you can’t scale. “You’re staying exactly here until I say otherwise.”

You feel the sting of his words, immediately interpreting them as proof he no longer trusts you. 

“I’m not restricting you because of anything you did or didn’t do,” he says firmly, understanding clear in his eyes. “You’ve just experienced severe trauma. The EMTs will check you out first, then I’ll bring you up to speed. You’re not being sidelined. I’m going to handle the scene, and once everything is secure, we will regroup and go from there. Do you understand?”

You nod, but your trust feels tissue-thin, easily shredded by self-doubt. Hotch studies you carefully, eyes narrowing just enough to communicate clearly that he knows exactly how hollow your assurance really is.

Still, he nods back gently, pulling out a chair. You sit.

Hotch effortlessly stepped into the space your panic had left open. You watched as he moved calmly through the room, issuing commands. He spoke briefly with the EMTs first, outlining precisely what they needed to check, sparing you the uncomfortable necessity of trying to articulate your confusion.

Moments later, another water bottle appeared in your grapes, placed decisively by Hotch, who barely broke stride in his quiet management of everything around you.

He anticipated your questions and worries before you could voice them, confirming that the unsub was secure and that no one else was injured. 

Each directive he gave on your behalf made you aware of just how badly you needed this — someone stronger, steadier, more certain than yourself, carefully taking control away.

Discovering that surrendering control could feel like finally breathing after holding your breath for far too long was unsettling yet profoundly comforting.

The EMT now moves cautiously around you, examining the side of your head, brushing your hair aside to search for injuries you know aren’t there. Still, you remain perfectly still.

You find Hotch standing nearby, arms loosely crossed, fixed on the EMT’s every movement. He occasionally interrupts with instructions, and the micromanagement that should feel excessive but instead makes you feel grateful.

“I’m sorry,” you finally blurt out. “I completely blanked today. I didn’t respond when I should’ve, and it put everyone in danger. I should’ve been more alert, and…” 

You swallow thickly, shame edging painfully into your words, gaze fixed stubbornly downward.

“You didn’t blank,” Hotch interrupts. “You experienced something called perceptual narrowing. It’s common under severe stress, especially when you’re caught completely off-guard. Your brain was trying to process too much at once, it’s an instinctive reaction, not a failure.” 

You nod hesitantly, biting your lip as you struggle to voice your lingering frustration. “I know that makes sense, but it’s more than just freezing. It’s afterward when I realized how little I actually contributed.”

“You weren’t supposed to contribute right then,” Hotch reminds you. “You were under strict instructions to stay exactly here and let me handle the rest. Trust me, I can manage just fine.” His eyes glimmer briefly with amusement. “Unless you’re saying you don’t trust me to take control?”

You quickly shake your head, cheeks burning hotter now that the EMT has moved away, leaving no buffer between you and Hotch.

“No — no, that’s not what I meant,” you stammer. “Of course I trust you. Probably more than —” You catch yourself abruptly, clearing your throat awkwardly. “I mean, I trust your judgment completely.”

Hotch regards you for a moment, a faint, knowing smile ghosting briefly across his lips before he masks it again.

“I know what you meant,” he says evenly, though the warmth in his voice suggests he heard far more than your careful correction. “I appreciate your trust.” He pauses briefly. “I’ll try not to abuse it.”

Abuse it. That is such a potent phrase. Could he? Would he? The rational answer is no, but another voice counters with maybe. The potential hangs there, tantalizing and terrifying in equal measure. You’ve handed him someone precious, breakable, and yet the risk of abuse feels softer, sweeter, when it’s him.

“You wouldn’t,” you whisper after a moment. “But I think even if you did, I might forgive you.”

💌 masterlist taglist has been disbanned! if you want to get updates about my writings follow and turn notifications on for my account strictly for reblogging my works! @mariasreblogs

[internetdaddy98]

Dr. Michael Robinavitch

Previous | Next [Series Masterlist] Pairing: Dr. Michael “Robby” Robinavitch x F!SeniorResident!Reader Summary: Dr. Robby explores his growing, conflicted feelings for Dr. Sheridan, his former intern and now a fourth-year resident. At fifty, Robby wrestles with the physical and emotional weight of his age, haunted by the ghosts of his past and bound by professional boundaries. 

Word Count: 1.3 K

Content Warning: Mentions of child death, medical procedures, panic attacks, PTSD, unresolved tension, will most likely be medically inaccurate at times. 

Fifty was a strange place to be. His body still functioned, mostly. The knees popped more than they used to, and his shoulder gave him hell on cold mornings, but he could still crack a chest open and suture an artery with steady hands. He hadn’t yet lost the sharpness that had once earned him his reputation, brilliant, relentless, borderline unapproachable.

But fifty came with shadows.

The kind that crept in during slow long hours, sat with him on empty benches in the locker room, or haunted him on the rooftop after a trauma that went sideways. Fifty came with ghosts. Names he remembered. Ones he wished he could forget.

And fifty came with rules. Lines he wasn’t supposed to cross.

Which made his growing thoughts about her a problem.

A stupid, persistent, aching problem.

He remembered her first day clearly. Not because she was particularly loud or impressive. Quite the opposite.

She was quiet. Mouse-quiet. Delicate in a way that didn’t belong in trauma. She was barely five feet tall and looked more like a med student lost in the wrong department than someone who'd willingly chosen emergency medicine.

He barely registered her until Dana leaned over the counter, coffee in hand, and said under her breath, “You’re gonna eat her alive.”

“What?” he muttered, not looking up from the chart in his hand.

“The new one. Dr. Sheridan. She’s yours.”

He glanced up, and there she was, badge twisted sideways, notepad hugged to her chest like armor, eyes wide and solemn beneath long lashes. He expected nerves. Instead, she said in the softest voice he’d ever heard.

“Dr. Y/N Sheridan. Intern. I’m assigned to your team.”

Polite. Precise. Unapologetically earnest.

He gave her two weeks.

She stayed three years.

She shouldn’t have survived the ER.

The first year, she barely spoke. When she did, it was always to ask a question she’d clearly thought about for hours. She was methodical, careful, and maddeningly meticulous. She checked charts twice, cleaned her own suture trays, followed up with patients who’d long since been discharged.

She didn’t belong here. He thought that often.

Too gentle. Too good.

But she never cracked.

She watched everything. Soaked it all in like a sponge. And by the end of the year, she had a reputation for being the intern who noticed things no one else did. The intern who never left early, never made excuses, never complained. Even when she was clearly drowning.

Some part of him respected that. Another part, the older, more protective part, hated it.

She reminded him of himself at her age. Before everything went to hell. She was too polite. Too gentle. Too kind. A med student who believed in checking on patients after shift ended, in explaining every step of a procedure, in treating addicts with the same tone of voice she used on elderly grandmothers.

In his experience, kindness like that either hardened or burned out.

But she stayed.

And it turned out her softness wasn’t fragility. It was endurance. Quiet, stubborn, impossible endurance. She never raised her voice, but she didn’t back down either. When she believed in something, she held the line, with insurance reps, with consultants, with Robby himself. By the end of her second year, she’d called him out three times. Always in private, always respectfully, but still. No one else did that.

No one else could.

He wasn’t sure when he started noticing the other things. The way her brown eyes, large and observant, looked at him as if he was offering the secret to life. The way her hair escaped its bun when she got too focused. The way she walked like she was trying to take up as little space as possible. The curve of her lips when she bit back a sarcastic comment.

The way her laugh, when she let herself laugh, hit him in the chest like an elbow.

At first, he chalked it up to proximity. He spent more time with her than anyone else. She shadowed him on trauma calls, peppered him with questions, challenged him in that quietly infuriating way he’d come to admire.

But then came that one night.

The panic attack.

He'd found her in the lockers, curled in on herself like she was trying to disappear into the ground. They’d just lost a kid. A drowning that had ended in a mother screaming into her child’s chest. She had led the code, her hands steady on the compressions, sweat darkening her scrubs.

And then, silence. Time of death. Everyone moved on.

But not her.

She'd vanished after the code. And Robby, who told himself he was just checking on her as a responsible attending, found her twenty minutes later, hyperventilating and pale.

He crouched beside her before he even thought about what he was doing.

“Sheri,” he said, a nickname he had said a hundred times but now tasted strange on his tongue.

She didn’t respond. Her fingers were clenched tight in her lap, nails digging crescents into her skin.

He should’ve stepped away. Should’ve called Dana, or Langdon, or someone less compromised.

But he stayed. Held her until her breathing slowed, until they were eye to eye and could feel her breath on his lips. His eyes flicked there, just for a second, just long enough to spark something new.

Something deep. Something old and buried and dangerous.

Something male.

Later, he would tell himself it was just a moment. Nothing more. Doctors comfort residents all the time. Panic attacks happen. It was a stressful case. She needed support.

But it wasn’t that. Not really.

It was something else.

Something dangerous.

After that, she started haunting him.

Not in the loud, obvious way. She didn’t flirt. She didn’t linger unnecessarily. She was still polite, still punctual, still relentlessly professional.

But he felt the shift.

The pause when their eyes met across the floor. The subtle angle of her body when she stood beside him, too close. The way her hand sometimes brushed his when she passed him a chart.

It was nothing. And it was everything.

The others noticed too. Dana gave him looks. Langdon smirked more than usual. Jack, on one of his rare crossovers, raised an eyebrow and said, “You’re playing with matches, Robby.”

He didn’t deny it.

But he didn’t stop either.

He saw her differently. And worse, he suspected she saw him differently, too.

There were too many moments. Too many looks. Times she lingered at his side just a little too long. Times he found himself waiting for her laugh. Times he caught himself watching the curve of her neck when she bent over a chart.

She made him feel young. And old. And hungry.

And then came the guilt.

Because he wasn’t twenty-nine.

He wasn’t even thirty-nine.

He was fifty.

And she was brilliant. Kind. Still whole in ways he hadn’t been for years.

He should’ve protected her from this. From him.

Instead, some dark part of him wanted to ruin her. To crack that composure. To drag her into the quiet, dim corners of the ER and see how much of that gentleness he could steal with just a kiss.

To hear that soft voice say his name in a way that had nothing to do with medicine.

He wanted to corrupt her.

God help him, he wanted to.

But he didn’t.

Because she was still his resident.

Because he was still her attending.

Because Dana would gut him, and Langdon would give him that look, and Jack—oh, Jack would know.

Because he told himself it was just tension. Nothing real. Nothing lasting.

But every time she walked into a room, tiny, deliberate, always two steps ahead of everyone around her, he felt something in his chest pull. Something deep and primitive and absolutely unforgivable.

And now it was her fourth year.

She wasn’t the intern anymore. She was steady. Capable. Respected.

She’d grown into herself — and out of the shadow of his mentorship.

And Robby was no longer sure if he was supposed to let her go. Or if she’d been quietly pulling him in all along. -------------------------------- For @unorris Happy Birthday <3

[hatussy]

fatal attraction | r.r [dark]

pairing: robert reynolds [sentry] x f!reader word count: 3650 warnings: smut, nsfw [18+ only], sex pollen, dark themes, violence/abuse, non con/dub-con, forced penetration, degradation, multiple orgasms/orgasm denial, biting, choking, knife play/blood, spanking/slapping,

summary: sex pollen, sex pollen, sex pollen. aka: in which you've been dosed

oneshot | masterlist

The scraping of metal against concrete alerts you to a new presence. Your strength has been zapped, barely able to lift your head off the small cot you’ve been lying in for days, weeks even. You lost track of how long you’ve been held captive. The minimal light you did see was from the overhead fluorescents as guards came by to check on you.

Food was scarce. They fed you minimally, knowing if you were well fed and hydrated the chance of you fighting back would increase. So they’d kept you borderline starved, dehydrated to the point your lips were cracked and your head throbbed. Any time they brought down water, it was only a small plastic cupful, never enough to satiate. Never enough to keep you going, but enough that it kept your body functioning.

Even when you asked for more, begged and pleaded with whoever had the job of giving you more water, they never followed through. Agreeing just to shut you up, the disappearing for god knows how long. 

The guard spoke lowly in a language you couldn’t translate. Whether it was because it was a language you didn’t understand, or because you were too tired to put in the effort to try harder, you weren’t sure. Judging by the harsh tone exchanged by the men stationed outside your room, it wasn’t good.

You were desperately holding out hope that the team would find you. That they’d bust through the compound wrecking all kinds of havoc. Every loud bang had you hoping that it was them, that they’d been able to track your location to its last known point.

The thick concrete walls stopped you from being able to use your powers. If you had more energy, more water, you knew you’d be able to reach out to someone. Bucky hated whenever you communicated with your powers, years of mind control was triggering whenever you spoke inside his head. He was out. Yelena also didn’t like it, the slightly older woman finding it creepy. Though you knew if it really came down to it, she’d get over it. She was a maybe. 

Alexei found it thrilling, often more intrigued by your voice being in his head. He got too distracted by the trick, going off on a tangent about how cool and different your abilities were. He was also out.

Ava was your best bet, but that was if you could penetrate the fortress you were held in. You knew it was more than concrete, something stronger that stopped your abilities from working at a distance or even up close.

You’d tried your first day in the cell. Trying to manipulate one of your guards into leading you outside, but he’d just grinned and slammed the door of your cell. Your cage. It had thrown you for a loop that he hadn’t been able to fall for your tricks. The one thing you could always count on was your ability to convince people to do something you wanted them to. Your mind was a weapon, and your captors knew exactly how to weaken you. Knew exactly how to make you doubt your abilities.

You hadn’t been part of the Thunderbolts for long, but the time you had spent with them had been interesting. This mission, the one where you’d been incapacitated and taken hostage, was up there as one of the worst missions. Most of them were decent, where you actually had enough intel and could subdue the intended culprits. Gone are the fucking days, though. 

You wished this mission had been like those – quick and easy, and a hell of a lot cleaner. 

There’s a whirring overhead, the small fan on the roof or your cell humming to life. You watch it spin, your eyes used to the darkness by now. The smell hits you first, a scent unfamiliar to you but you’re too tired to care. Too tired to do anything but continue to breathe in whatever the fuck they’re feeding into your cell. Too tired to try and hold your breath for fear of what’s to come.

At this point in time, whatever they had planned was only going to make you wish you were dead. For now, all you could do was breathe and hope for the easy way out.

It starts as a warmth to your skin. A low and slow heat that tickles your cheeks before bursting to life in your chest. The warmth coursed throughout your entirety, blossoming further down in your abdomen. 

The ache felt never ending.

The deep seated desire was lodged inside you and growing fervently. Bubbling just below the surface, desperate to be released.

You’d never felt like this before. Whatever you’d been dosed with coursed through your veins, causing you to writhe on the bed trying to placate the feeling. Urging it to subside, to give you any kind of reprieve. 

Every time you rubbed your thighs together the sensation amplified, sending you into a frenzy. It felt so good, but it wasn’t helping. It was only amplifying the sensation. You felt like your body was in overdrive and nothing was helping.

Your pulse raced, pounding in your ears. You panted, hands fisting the thin mattress on the cot as you forced your legs apart, fighting against whatever was in your system.

“Fighting only makes it worse.”

The voice was eerie, distant. You couldn’t tell if the person it belonged to was in your cell with you, or if it had come through the speakers on the wall. 

You’re gasping for breath as desire flows throughout your body. The voice is right, though. Fighting it only makes it worse, but attempting to soothe the ache just heightens everything you feel. You’re in a bind and not in a good way. 

Your eyes fly open as you feel a hand against your face, fingers stroking down your skin before they wrap around your neck. Your own hands fly to their wrist, trying to pry the fingers free. All it makes them do is squeeze tighter as their other hand forces your legs apart.

You gasp, unable to speak as your oxygen is slowly cut off. The person cups your sex over your tactical gear, roughly groping you, but the whole body ache you’re experiencing lessens slightly. Instead of a protest, your body reacts graciously, hips bucking against the person’s hand.

“I knew that was what you needed,” the voice taunts and lessens their grip on your neck. You gasp heavily, drawing breath into your lungs as the dizziness dissipates from your mind.

 It allows you a moment of clarity. The person is a man, he’s real, and he’s touching you. You want him to stop, want him to leave. You don’t know him, you don’t want him. But it feels so good. The ache is still there with a vengeance, but now you know how to soothe it. You can take care of yourself, right?

Wrong. 

The hand that was around your neck connects with your cheek, a loud slap echoing around the concreted cell.

“Fuck you,” you spit vehemently, launching yourself to your feet and taking a fighting stance. 

If you were in your right mind, you’d have seen his hand reach out. Feel it wrap around your ankle. You’re shoved up against the wall, the cot creaking as he climbs up onto it and uses his body weight to keep you pinned.

A whimper falls past your lips, his hand roughly gripping your face. You swear you can see a smirk on his face as he presses his body against yours, rolling his hips so you can feel just how aroused he is. You spit at him, disgusted, but your hands are useless. Your body is betraying your mind, so desperate for a release you refuse to give to this man. 

You force yourself to fight, to spit in his face and throw a punch. It takes all of your strength, but you do it. You fail to see the punch he throws back, connecting with your jaw. 

“Stupid whore,” he spits and you swear you can hear a smile in his voice. “It’s going to be fun breaking you in.”

You stagger along the wall, knowing this is the fight of your life, but your limbs are heavy and desire is calling to you like a traitorous bitch. You feel him grab your hair, slamming you into the concrete with a force that has you reeling. 

You feel sluggish, like you’re moving in slow motion. You know that’s not the case. You know it’s whatever is coursing through your veins, some kind of virus. If you had more of your wits about you, you’d know it wasn’t a virus. No virus makes you wildly, insatiably horny. 

Your fingers scrape against concrete desperately, trying to grab a hold of something. Anything. A scream is caught in your throat as he drags your face along the wall, skin catching against the raised, jagged pieces that overhang the otherwise smooth wall. 

He laughs as you flail, tripping over your own feet as he throws you back down onto the cot. You barely have time to recover as he smacks you once more, this time on the other cheek. He tsk’s, gripping your hands in one of his and pinning them above your head. 

“I promise you’re going to enjoy this, kitten.” 

His lips brush over your ear and you pull it back before headbutting him as hard as you can, his legs either side of yours, keeping them pinned. 

He chuckles, your head having only connected with his jaw with nowhere near enough force to injure. At this point, you’re only hurting yourself. 

You feel the cold sting of metal pierce your stomach, the sharp point likely drawing blood as it slices through your shirt. The material is tight against your skin and you scream as it continues to dig into your stomach. It doesn’t feel deep enough to disembowel you, but it’s still not pleasant. The knife pierces and drags through your skin, moving higher, the blade slicing through your bra, nipping at your neck as the last of your shirt is sliced open.

You whimper as he bites the handle of the knife, his hand roughly groping your breasts as he hums, his hand gliding through the blood slickening your skin. It makes your stomach churn, but as he tweaks your nipples, you fail to care. Arching into his touch despite desperately not wanting to.

A pleased gasp falls past your lips and he chuckles once again, gripping the knife and shuffling back so he can cut your pants off you. He pins your knees to the cot, the blade pressing into the flesh over your pubic bone. You hiss as it pierces the skin and he drags it down, cutting away your tactical pants while narrowly missing your sex. 

Still, your body is on fire, aroused by even the possibility of that happening. Of his blade knicking your most delicate flesh. You moan loudly, unabashedly. It only seems to spur him on even more.

He groans appreciatively, maneuvering you so he can pull your clothes off. Leaving your pants bunched at your ankles, but ridding you of your shirt completely. As he either forgets to pin your hands down, or skips over it completely, you take the chance to claw at him. Raking your nails down his face.

His fist connects with your face again. “Get me some handcuffs for this slut,” he growls as you cradle your face, continuing to fight him off as best as you can. It’s clear he has you at a disadvantage, your body continuing to crave a release it seems will be by his hand. Or his cock.

Metal clangs as he catches the restraints, cuffing one hand to the metal frame of the cot before forcing your other into it as well. You buck your hips, desperate to try and continue to fight. Desperate, desperate, desperate.

You’re dripping with arousal. Blood and sweat and grime coat your skin. The ache flowing through your body is crippling. You feel exhausted, beaten and bruised. You know this is only going to get worse, but you’re not in any position to do anything about it. You can’t fight anymore, so you submit.

He drags his fingers through your slickened folds, spreading your lips and robbing his fingers over your swollen clit. You whimper and buck your hips, a desperate “no, please,” falling past your lips.

“I’m only trying to help,” he says condescendingly. “You want me to help, I know you do. I can smell your arousal.”

“Fuck you,” you spit, your whimper betraying you as you feel the knife pressed against the underside of your breast.

He tuts disapprovingly. “You know you want this. Be a good girl and take it.”

He moves the knife to rest against the base of your throat, your pulse spiking and body stilling in response. He seems to like that, you think. Your stomach churns as his hand returns between your legs.

“Stop,” you plead but it’s futile.

He ignores you, slipping two fingers into your soaked cunt. You moan lowly in response, trying to fight the pleasure that relieves the painful ache. Not wanting to give him the satisfaction, but you know it’s pointless. You know he’s going to take what he wants, and you try to find a happy place to disappear to. You try to steel your mind to block out the assault that’s taking place, but your mind isn’t the weapon it usually is. The pleasure coursing through you renders you powerless to his ministrations. The way his fingers fuck into you, grazing over that spot inside you that has you writhing and gasping. 

“You can cum, kitten,” he goads you. Your body is convulsing in response, pleasure bursting through you and relieving the pain you'd been feeling. 

You moan heartily, feeling it rip through your chest and burst from your lips. 

The ache is still there, still heavy on your soul. A constant reminder that he did this to you, that he’s the one bringing you pleasure despite the hell you’re in.

He adds a third finger, continuing to fuck into you. Stretching you, bringing you over the edge a second time with no chance of protest before your moans were tearing their way from your throat yet again.

You panted heavily, nipples painfully hard. With each breath the tip of the knife dug into your skin a little bit more, but you felt wild. Overwhelmed. Your body was on fire and he was the extinguisher. He was also the ignition source, the reason you were even in this predicament at all. 

“There she is, my complacent little whore,” he praises, stroking your face appreciatively. “Shame what happened to your face.” He tuts disapprovingly, gripping your jaw as he turns your head from side to side. 

You grit your teeth, anger flaring that quickly subsides as he readjusts his hold on the knife. The blade pierced your neck a little more, a little deeper. It’s close to your windpipe, any deeper and you know it’s game over. You know it’s a slow, painful death as you choke on your own blood.

It’s smarter not to fight. 

It’s smarter to just take whatever he gives you next.

“Please,” you whimper. “It hurts so much.”

He’s slowly rubbing your clit, alternating between rolling his fingers over your sensitive, swollen bundle of nerves and slipping his fingers back inside your needy little cunt.

The pleasure starts to build again, the ache turning into something more. Something feral. Primal. 

You whimper as he withdraws his fingers, the blade no longer pressed against your neck. You’re about to complain, about to beg, but you hear the sound of his zipper being tugged down. You feel the bed jostle as you assume he’s removing his pants. His weight no longer pins your legs to the bed and you take the chance to pull your knees to your chest before kicking out at him, hearing him grunt as he lands heavily on his back on the cold concrete floor. The knife clinks as it falls from his hand, disappearing into the darkness.

“I’ll fuck the fight right out of you, whore,” he snarls, his hands gripping your ankles before he straddles your legs again. “You start to cum, I stop. Let the pollen drive you fucking insane. You’re just a little toy for me to play with. I tried to help you, I did. You won’t submit to me and let me take it? I’ll force my way into your needy little cunt. I’ll fuck you with my knife and gut you from the inside out. Is that what you want, hm?”

You shudder, swallowing hard as arousal pools between your legs again. The ache is back with a vengeance, but his words start to sink in.

Pollen. That’s what you’ve been dosed with. That’s what came in through the vents. No wonder you’re wild with desire. Feral with it.

He slides his hand up your torso, spearing your blood around your body. Dipping his fingers into the wounds he’s caused you, making you cry out. His laughter is wicked, fingers sliding around your neck and squeezing as you clamp your legs shut, refusing to give him access. He grunts, wedging his knee between your thighs. Spanking your pussy as he forces your legs open. 

“You’re going to take my cock,” he growls and you feel your head spinning once again. His grip on your neck tight, making it harder to draw breath. Your heart is hammering away in your chest, hips bucking as you feel him pinch your clit harshly.

“Please don’t, please don’t.”

It’s useless. You don’t even know why you tried. You’d only wasted valuable breath. 

You pull at the handcuffs, trying to twist your body away from him, but he’s everywhere. The tip of his cock spreads you open and he’s seated inside you with one harsh thrust. You’re seeing stars, whimpering and struggling and gasping for breath. Praying to whatever God might be listening that someone will come and save you, because it’s obvious you can’t save yourself.

He’s thick and heavy and stretching your needy cunt more than his fingers ever could. Reaching places inside you that have you trying to blink spots from your vision. And he takes you with force, without a care for how you’re feeling. You deserve it, after all. You’re just a warm, wet hole for him to use, just like he told you.

You feel yourself fading, feel yourself struggling to hold onto reality, but it seems as though he wants you conscious. Wants you aware of everything he’s doing to you, because his hand is gone from your throat and your breathing is jagged. It hurts with each inhale, unable to find solace. Unable to find any good with this situation.

Until your body starts to betray you again. Your hips buck as your walls clamp down around his thick cock.

“You greedy little bitch,” he tuts, slipping from your sopping cunt with a sickening squelch. You hear his hand moving against his cock, leaning back in his knees as he keeps your legs open. “You lost the right to cum when you kicked me in the chest.”

You whimper despite your best efforts. Hips bucking up into nothing, desperate for release.

“Please, please,” you beg. “I’ll be good. I can be good. Please, oh fuck. Please.”

You sound desperate. You don’t recognise yourself. You almost cry in frustration, the pleasure subsiding and turning into that god awful ache that won’t go away.

“That’s it, beg like the greedy little cockslut I know you are,” he says. Praises. “Tell me how badly you need my cock. How badly you need to cum. How good I make you feel.”

You cry out in frustration, a broken sob falling past your lips. “I need your cock so badly. Please, please let me cum on your cock. You make me feel so good. Fuck, make  it stop hurting please. Please, fuck, oh please.”

You feel him at your entrance once again, thrusting into you without warning. Your arms strain as you pull against the handcuffs, metal biting into your wrists. His thrusts are fast and rough, grunting as he seeks his own high. His fingers digging into the flesh of your hips, using you for leverage.

You gasp and moan, body floating. Mind wandering. It feels so good– he feels so good. Taking and taking and taking without a care for you and your own needs. He’s giving you what you asked for. What your body craves, but he’s not going out of his way to make you cum again. That’s all on you.

You feel it building, your toes curling in your boots. Your legs hiking higher up his back, trying to angle him where you need him. Feeling his cock press against your cervix has you seeing stars, has your body reacting before you even realise what’s happening. Your orgasm crashing into you so violently, so desperately. You don’t even feel his thrusts grow sloppy. You don’t hear him telling you he’s “gonna flood this greedy little cunt.” You don’t feel him biting down on your neck, but you feel him push your head to the side. His fingers hooked into your mouth, hand pressed against your cheek as he pins you in place. As he cums without a care in the world for you or how he forced his way into your pussy.

He doesn’t even bother to uncuff you as he slides out of you. Doesn’t care to do anything except leave without so much as a look behind him. He does, however, stop to pick up his knife. 

God forbid he leave you with a fighting chance to escape. 

[ivysangel]

expanding on this post except it's where dick, roy, jason, and wally fall in the frat ranking and why (this is just for fun, don't take it too seriously)

DICK

is ranked number one every year until he graduates (duh) because he's a borderline nympho and can't go a single night without getting his dick wet

pledges aspire to be him but he's seriously contemplated attending a sex addicts anonymous meeting because he skipped half his classes last semester to fuck girls on greek row and his grades suffered

has a collection of underwear he steals from girls to keep as trophies and had to change the spot where he keeps them because one of his frat brothers found them and went around the house telling everyone that dick wore women's panties

fucked that guys ex to spite him and got away with it because he's super hot and also the frat president (defintely a legacy pledge too)

has told girls "i love you" and "you're the only one for me" to get in their pants and has either ghosted or messaged them "it's not you, it's me" immediately after leaving their dorm

there are multiple hate posts about him in the gotham university subreddit and all of the upvotes are from girls he’s fucked

ROY

ranked in the lower half of the top 10 but is on a mission to break top 5

gets a lot of play just from being hot but also keeps a list of girls dick rejects so he can be the first to console them and subsequently get in their pants, has "i can make you feel better"ed his way into many hook ups

has a thing for girls with dark hair who play hard to get and has unironically sent to the frat group chat "i need a goth bitch in my life"

scared away multiple girls by wanting to fuck them in the ass and always follows it up with "aw come on??? it was a joke!" even though it's not a joke

came too fast once as a freshman and got nicknamed speedy

is still bitter about it and sometimes sends to the gc "lasted 2 hours, who's speedy now?" and everyone's like "still you."

JASON

isn't ranked at all and not because he doesn't get any play, just because he doesn't kiss and tell

fully thinks the ranking is corny but also takes pride in knowing that if his bodycount was made public he wouldn't be at the absolute bottom

hasn't slept with that many girls but has had so many blowjobs that he's sometimes wondered if his dick will start pruning like wet fingers

felt dumb wondering that so he doubled up on his bio classes the next semester and then hooked up with his ta because she was hot and smart

is like the only guy in the frat that cares about safe sex and has had to let his brothers know on multiple occasions that their junk isn't supposed to be red or itchy, and has had the pleasure of accompanying more than a few of them on trips to the std clinic

never tells anyone that he's dick's adoptive brother, so every time they go home together over break and he decides to text a girl, she always responds with, "you're not gay?"

WALLY

would be ranked low because he's a loser and has zero game/cannot function normally around hot girls and will make a fool of himself 97% of the time but his oral skills cancel it out so he's somewhere in the middle

is one of the first places girls go after breaking up with their shitty bf's because he's sweet and will go down on them for hours without expecting anything in return

once had a conversation with jason where he reffered to his girls as clients and jason said he "made it sound like prostitution"

once had a conversation with jason where he said his jaw was getting tired and he was thinking about charging for his “service” and jason said, "that would be actual prostitution"

has cum too quick on multiple occasions but didn't get a nickname because nobody was surprised

once hooked up with another ginger, and roy had to sit him down to tell him that it was fundamentally wrong and that he was never allowed to do it again or else he'd be kicked out of the frat

[fear-is-truth]

𝓝𝐒𝐅𝐖 𝓐𝐋𝐏𝐇𝐀𝐁𝐄𝐓 ── ft. 𝐍𝐀𝐌-𝐆𝐘𝐔 ┊남규

warnings — MDNI 18+・ fem!reader ・english is not my first language so bear with me・not proofread

❥ a/n: think i might’ve gone a lil carried away. oh well

𝓐 = 𝐀𝐅𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐂𝐀𝐑𝐄 . . . what he’s like after sex

nam-gyu is not particularly soft or sentimental about it. he’s not the type to whisper sweet nothings or linger too long in the moment unless it suits him. aftercare for him is minimal, functional—if it happens at all.

he might roll over or light a cigarette, letting the smoke curl lazily into the air as he decompresses. but he’s not completely thoughtless; he’d notice if you looked uncomfortable or out of sorts. “you good?” might be all he says, his tone almost indifferent, but the way his eyes flicker toward you gives him away—he’s serious.

if you ask for something—water, a towel, or cuddles—nam-gyu would sigh like it’s an inconvenience, but he’d still do it. begrudgingly, but he���d do it. he’s not used to giving, so gestures like helping clean up or asking if you’re okay feel foreign to him. he’ll grumble about it, but deep down, there’s a satisfaction in being needed.

his movements are kinda clumsy when he bothers to help. he’ll shove a glass of water into your hand or awkwardly brush your hair away from your face. physical closeness is rare unless you initiate it. if you nuzzle against him, he’ll freeze for a second before relaxing, letting you rest against his chest.

𝓑 = 𝐁𝐎𝐃𝐘 𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐓 . . . his favorite body part of his & yours

nam-gyu is obsessed with his hands—long, slender fingers that are both capable and calculating. he knows how to use them, and he likes to watch the way they move, whether he’s lighting a cigarette, adjusting his rings or gliding them over your skin.

after fights, he secretly enjoys when you tend to his scraped or bruised knuckles, even though he’ll complain about the sting of antiseptic. the way you fuss over him feels intimate, and he secretly enjoys it.

there’s a lewd fascination with how his hands look around your neck or slipping past your lips for you to suck on. not just sexual (though it is very much sexual); it’s also the thrill of control and trust, how you let him push boundaries.

has a not-so-subtle fixation on your breasts, and it’s written all over him whenever you wear something that accentuates it. tube tops, low necklines—they might as well be his weakness. his eyes linger too long, dark with something both appreciative and borderline lascivious, and he doesn’t even bother hiding it. likes to encircle his arms around you from behind under the guise of a hug, but uses that as an opportunity to grope and squeeze at your tits.

𝓒 = 𝐂𝐔𝐌 . . . anything to do with cum, basically

nam-gyu is not reckless when it comes to stuff like this; he uses condoms most of the time—even though he would prefer to fuck you raw, the two of you aren’t ready to deal with the consequences or extra effort. not in this economy…

he generally hates mess. not because he’s a clean freak, but because he’s practical to a fault. the thought of having to change the sheets annoys him enough to avoid it altogether. if things get messy, he’ll grumble about it, probably throw the blanket over the spot, and deal with it later—or make you deal with it.

sure, the sight of you on your knees—lips swollen, eyes watering—gulping down his load does something to him, but what he loves more is making a mess on you, your body is his favourite canvas. he’s not subtle about it either. the lazy smirk on his face when he sees the sticky aftermath on your chest, abdomen or ass? pure satisfaction. “guess we need a shower now,” he’ll say, acting like it’s the most natural solution. the shower is just another excuse to keep his hands on you.

𝓓 = 𝐃𝐈𝐑𝐓𝐘 𝐒𝐄𝐂𝐑𝐄𝐓 . . . pretty self explanatory

pansexual or bisexual but would rather choke than admit it, even to himself.

and yeah, he’s totally a panty thief. likes to jerk off with your lace panties wrapped around his cock.

𝓔 = 𝐄𝐗𝐏𝐄𝐑𝐈𝐄𝐍𝐂𝐄 . . . how experienced is he? does he know what he’s doing?

yes, he knows exactly what he’s doing, and he’s not shy about letting you know. his confidence is almost obnoxious, but it’s earned—he’s had enough practice to back it up.

his body count isn’t as high as he brags it to be, but working as a club promoter has its perks. his looks, charm, and the nightlife scene give him a lot of opportunities.

𝓕 = 𝐅𝐀𝐕𝐎𝐔𝐑𝐈𝐓𝐄 𝐏𝐎𝐒𝐈𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍 . . . this goes without saying

definitely missionary or any position that lets him see your face. it’s not necessarily about the intimacy—he just likes watching your reactions, like he’s trying to gauge how much control he has.

he’s also into standing positions in small or semi-public spaces, like bathrooms or closets. the risk factor gives him a thrill, and he loves the idea of being impulsive and spontaneous with you.

when he’s sleepy but still wanting to fuck, he defaults to cowgirl. he’s too tired to put in much effort, so he’ll let you take the reins while he lounges back, half-lidded but still enjoying the view of your bouncing tits. his hands won’t stay idle, though—he’ll grab your hips, guiding you just enough to stay in control without actually moving much himself.

𝓖 = 𝐆𝐎𝐎𝐅𝐘 . . . is he more serious in the moment? or is he humorous? etc.

he’s playful and teasing during foreplay—loves getting a rise out of you. but the second things escalate, he flips a switch and gets super serious. no laughing or joking in the middle of it—it’s like he’s hyper-focused, almost like he has something to prove.

𝓗 = 𝐇𝐀𝐈𝐑 . . . how well groomed is he? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.

the carpet matches the drapes, though he doesn’t think about it much. also, he’s naturally sparse down there, but still keeps it trimmed. not obsessive about grooming, but he knows the bare minimum is necessary.

𝓘 = 𝐈𝐍𝐓𝐈𝐌𝐀𝐂𝐘 . . . how is he during the moment? the romantic aspect

during sex, nam-gyu isn’t traditionally romantic, but he’s deeply physical and expressive in his own way. he doesn’t rely on words or overt displays of affection; instead, he shows his emotions through the way he fucks you, like he’s trying to prove something to himself—or maybe to you. he thrives on control and the feeling of being desired, so he focuses on what gets the strongest reactions out of you.

emotionally, he struggles with vulnerability. if he feels too exposed or like things are getting too intimate, he’ll mask it by being rougher or redirecting the focus back onto you. for him, sex is both an outlet for his insecurities and a way to feel closer (in the spiritual sense and literal sense) to you without actually having to open up.

𝓙 = 𝐉𝐀𝐂𝐊 𝐎𝐅𝐅 . . . masturbation headcanon

he’s pretty average about it—not an excessive masturbator, not abstinent; it’s just another part of his routine. usually to porno magazines, or even just your instagram beach photos. if you guys have made sex tapes, then he’d jerk off to that.

if you ever walked in on him, he’d play it off with a smirk and a sarcastic comment like, “oh, hey, you’re just in time.”

𝓚 = 𝐊𝐈𝐍𝐊𝐒 . . . one or more of his kinks

asphyxiation: there’s something strangely erotic to him about having his hand around your neck, feeling your pulse beneath his fingers. the power dynamic in that moment is a huge turn-on for him.

praise kink: he’ll never in a million years admit it, but hearing you tell him how good he is or how much you need him in that breathy way fuels his ego like nothing else. one of the rare things that makes him feel genuinely confident rather than overcompensating.

light bondage: he’s into improvising—using things like neckties or scarves to tie your wrists.

𝓛 = 𝐋𝐎𝐂𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍 . . . favourite places to do the deed

your place or his are his favorites. while nam-gyu enjoys the occasional quickie in the club’s bathroom or a blowjob in his car, he’s not big on real risks—he likes the privacy and control that comes with familiar settings. the bedroom is his domain, where he feels most comfortable. to have the freedom to let loose without worrying about interruptions or consequences.

𝓜 = 𝐌𝐎𝐓𝐈𝐕𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍 . . . what turns him on

revealing outfits drive him crazy. whether it’s a short skirt, a crop top, or something sheer, he won’t bother hiding how much he’s staring. if anyone else is looking too? it flips a switch in him, equal parts possessive and turned on.

you being a little wild, rebellious, or feisty absolutely does it for him. that lana del rey lyric, “i heard that you like the bad girls, honey is that true?” yup. very true. might as well be written about him. he loves seeing you do rebellious, crazy shit—flipping off a guy who’s being a creep, starting a catfight—makes his blood rush south.

𝓝 = 𝐍𝐎 . . . something he wouldn’t do, turn offs

overtly public sex is a hard no for him. he likes the idea of risk but not the actual consequences, so anything too exposed or risky is off the table. he’s not into watersports either.

𝓞 = 𝐎𝐑𝐀𝐋 . . . preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.

definitely more of a receiver. he’s selfish about it and won’t hesitate to ask for a blowjob outright, expecting you to comply like it’s second nature.

however, nam-gyu knows when to step up—like when you’re mad at him or during your time of the month. in those moments, he’ll willingly switch roles and be a giver, partly to make amends and partly because it’s one of the few ways he knows how to take care of you.

𝓟 = 𝐏𝐀𝐂𝐄 . . . is he fast and rough? slow and sensual?

most of the time, he fucks you fast and rough, driven by his impatience and desire to be in control. he doesn’t like drawing things out unless he’s teasing you to get a reaction—then, he’ll slow down just enough to keep you frustrated.

when he’s drunk or sleepy, though, he’s slower, almost a sensual edge to it, like he’s savouring the moment because he’s too tired to rush. it feels more intimate than usual, even if he doesn’t realise it.

if he’s half-asleep but still horny, he’ll put in the effort despite his exhaustion. it’s less about performance and more about fulfilling that need, but his thrusts are deeper and in a more rhythmic, relaxed tempo. he’d probably crash right after.

𝓠 = 𝐐𝐔𝐈𝐂𝐊𝐈𝐄 . . . his opinions on quickies

quickies are practically his bread and butter, especially when he’s at work or in a time crunch. he often initiates one in random places around club pentagon if he thinks you can get away with it. it’s part of the thrill for him—he loves the challenge of making you cum in a tight timeframe.

𝓡 = 𝐑𝐈𝐒𝐊 . . . is he game to experimenting? does he take risks? etc.

he’s open to experimenting as long as it doesn’t cross into his hard “no” zones.

𝓢 = 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐌𝐈𝐍𝐀 . . . how many rounds can he go for? how long does he last?

if he’s sober, he can usually manage one solid rounds, maybe two if he’s really into it. he tends to push himself, but he doesn’t have endless energy—he says it’s “more about quality over quantity.”

if he’s high, it’s hit or miss. sometimes drugs make him last longer, but other times, he burns out quickly, cummin’ too early and getting embarrassed about it.

𝓣 = 𝐓𝐎𝐘𝐒 . . . does he own toys? does he use them? on you or himself?

nam-gyu doesn’t spend money on toys, but he has a friend who runs a sex shop, and he’s shameless about “borrowing” or pressuring them to hand over new stuff.

he’s not really dependent on them but enjoys using them for variety, especially if it’s something you’re curious about. his main focus is on impressing you, so if toys can help, sure he’s all in.

𝓤 = 𝐔𝐍𝐅𝐀𝐈𝐑 . . . how much he likes to tease

“unfair” is his middle name…and he’s so mean about it. he’ll pretend to ignore you, act aloof, or be completely indifferent just to get under your skin. loves it when you get flustered and whiny, feeding off your reactions like it’s his favourite pastime.

he’s got zero sportsmanship, though. if you flip the script and start teasing him, he’ll immediately get defensive or annoyed, like, “can you stop? it’s not funny.” he can dish it out but can’t take it.

𝓥 = 𝐕𝐎𝐋𝐔𝐌𝐄 . . . how loud he is, what sounds he makes

not super loud, definitely on the quieter side. more of a grunter and groaner. dirty talk happens, but it’s not a constant thing—he saves it for when he wants to rile you up. most of the time, his focus is on showing rather than talking.

𝓦 = 𝐖𝐈𝐋𝐃 𝐂𝐀𝐑𝐃 . . . a random headcanon

okay, hear me out: ever since he met the famous rapper in club pentagon he has some weird fantasy involving you, him, and thanos (his threesome dream team). it started as a passing thought—but the more he thought about it, the more it spiraled into something oddly specific.

𝓧 = 𝐗-𝐑𝐀𝐘 . . . what’s going on under those clothes

namgyu’s body is lean and deceptively strong. he’s not overly bulky, but his frame has a wiry, muscular quality to it. he was built for stealth and speed rather than brute force. his abs aren’t overly defined, but a v-line runs down to his waist.

okay okay i know y’all are waiting for this… approximately 6 inches erect and slightly curved to the right. rosy pink tip. definitely veiny, has a vein that starts on the side and breaks off into two and one goes all the way to the tip.

𝓨 = 𝐘𝐄𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆 . . . how high is his sex drive?

working at a club means being constantly surrounded by temptation and indulgence, which naturally keeps his desire elevated. despite this, nam-gyu’s self-control is remarkable—largely because of the demands of his environment. he’s learned how to compartmentalise and maintain razor-sharp focus, even in high-stakes or chaotic situations. but when the moment presents itself, when there’s no pressing business to handle or distractions to fend off, all that restraint slips away, and his libido skyrockets.

𝓩 = 𝐙𝐙𝐙 . . . how quickly he falls asleep afterwards

when he’s had a particularly intense time or pushed himself physically and mentally, he’ll crash immediately. on nights where he’s less physically exerted, it’s more of a slow burn—he lays in bed, smoke some fags to decompress, getting lost in the post-coital haze as his mind wanders.

 fear-is-truth 2025 — all rights reserved. do not modify, repost, translate, or plagiarise my content.

[fligniuz]

sex for homework

luigi mangione x reader

｡𖦹°‧ you ask your cute tutor to help you study for your math final.

word count: 5.5k • part of my study buddies series (read here!) • nsfw • read on ao3

warnings : f! reader; EXPLICIT; dumbification if U squint; praise; oral (m! receiving); pre calc lol

notes : crossposting my shit to tumblr and starting with arguably one of my greatest uses of free will in history. title frommm:

You have a bit of a dilemma.

Well, it would be more accurate to say that you had a dilemma, have had one for quite a while now—your current grievances are merely extensions of a constant, one raging, blood-thirsty, borderline psychopathic problem of a class. MTH121, Concepts & Applications, is the only remaining mathematics credit required for your degree, and, coincidentally, absolutely no one told you that that’s really just a fancy name for pre-calculus. Because the universe hates you.

Your final is tomorrow. Yes, tomorrow. If that wasn’t bad enough, your brain has utterly fucked you; months spent poring over formulas and right triangles amounts to nothing in the moment, every relevant fragment of knowledge completely foreign to your burnt out, sleep deprived, caffeine ridden psyche. So here you sit, “studying”, armed with just your textbook and Khan Academy tutorials.

Is it too late to switch majors? Yes, you decide, massaging your temples as you take another glance at your notes. A mass of numbers, variables, and scribbled matrices clogs the pages, complete with your near ineligible annotations, details added in the heat of a lecture. You never knew there could be so many different types of numbers. Solve for x. 5 + 2x to the 2nd power = 8x. Factor x3 - 3x to the 2nd power - 4x + 12. Find the vertex of the function f(x) = x to the 2nd power + 4x + 3. Determine the value of x if the sum of the following sequence converges to 5. How any of this is relevant to your future non-mathematics degree is beyond you.

What the hell is a vertex again? And what does it matter? You’d rather be sleeping, or drunk. Whatever.

You have one saving grace. Since your freshman year you’ve been employing a little cheat-sheet, your one-way ticket to having math explained to you in a language understood by plebeians like yourself: one Luigi Mangione, a friend of a friend of a friend, possibly the smartest guy you know (and you’re far from the only person to voice that opinion). Your self-appointed tutor—and unfortunately for you, probably the most appetizing of any of the frat guys you’ve met in college, to put it chastely. The actual knowledge is just a bonus, really, because unlike other tutors you’ve worked with Luigi seems to actually care; he wants you to walk away from him with a solid understanding of the material, rather than a temporary knowledge that gets your homework done but is absent from your memory by the time of your exams. And it’s hard to write off the fact that he’s easy on the eyes.

…Pretty damn hard, actually. Because—in all honesty—you’re really into Luigi. Another thing that’s hard to do is get your math homework done when you’re busy fucking yourself with your fingers, like you tend to do after your time with him, thinking about his cock, his hands, the way he would fill you, pin you down underneath him, smirk at you and tell you dirty things like that’s my girl, that’s my good fucking girl, that’s it, give it to me, show me how pretty you look when you come all over me like this…

Great. At this pace, you’ll never get anything done.

Your phone buzzes.

About an hour ago, you sent him a photo of your current predicament: your laptop and notebook open, and you sitting criss-crossed in front of it, an exaggerated pout on your lips. A few moments later, you sent another, this time of your middle finger pointed directly at your professor’s official portrait. Now, he responds:

Academic Weapon (Luigi) : Smh

Who studies the night before their final?? Dummy

You smile, replying:

i do :(

help pls :((

Academic Weapon (Luigi) : You poor thing

And then:

Academic Weapon (Luigi) : Come over. In like 15

We’ll work it out together

Score. He adds:

Academic Weapon (Luigi) : And I better not hear any complaining when I make you actually do the math

Your crush feels elementary, like you’ve got the hots for the nerdy jock on the playground that’s miles out of your league and that every girl on planet Earth is fighting tooth and nail for. You respond:

no promises :P

You pray to your lucky stars that you can study as nonchalantly as humanly possible.

You told him you wouldn’t complain, and you’ve tried, you really have. But dividing radicals is fucking stupid and useless and the more you look at your paper the more these numbers and symbols really start to look all the same to you, just scribbles, meaningless scribbles of made-up concepts that have nothing to do with your career prospects whatsoever. Who gives a flying fuck about solving equations with these weird ass numbers that normal people don’t even use?

You must be thinking out loud, because Luigi laughs next to you on the couch. He is laughing at your frustration. What an emotionally supportive tutor. You groan and thread your fingers through your hair, massaging your temples.

Still smiling just slightly, he starts to gather up your things. “Alright, look, how about we take a break?” He glances over at you, still holding your head in your hands. “Yeah, let’s take a break for a minute.”

He gets up from the couch, disappears into the kitchen for just a moment. Comes back with a glass of orange juice. For you. You try not to think about how pathetic it is that the most romantic gesture a man has done for you in the past three years is bring you juice. Instead you watch him, sipping slowly—no pulp, he knows you so well—and peeking through your eyelashes as he scuttles around his dorm, just the two of you alone together, while he throws some laundry into a basket and absentmindedly closes doors of unoccupied rooms. You have never noticed how defined his calves are before, nor how his curls bounce just slightly when he walks fast or how his shorts sag on his hips just right, just enough for you to get a peek of his V-line and the waistband of his boxers when he raises his arms to stretch—

Nonchalant. Demure. Mindful. You are failing so hard at the one thing you’ve forbidden yourself from doing: staring at him until your eyes are practically burning holes in his clothes and he’s melting into the floor. Not entirely your fault. He should’ve known to dress modestly around you. Around anybody, for that matter.

Luigi comes to sit by you now. As you tuck your hair behind your ears you can feel his arm move to rest along the back of the couch, almost around you, but not quite.

“Hi,” you say, propping your head up on your arm.

He smiles at you. You can’t even look him in the eye. “Did you think more about your radicals?”

“Don’t remind me,” you groan, rolling your eyes. “No. I didn’t.”

“Well, what were you thinking about?”

You swallow the conspiratorial intuition that he has to be fucking with you. Maybe he sees it on your face. Can smell it on you. Something.

“I was trying to think of some things I’d rather be doing,” you offer. “Instead of math.”

Your heart feels three beats faster all of a sudden, and when did he get so close to you? Your thighs are touching, his knee brushing against yours. “And what did you come up with?” he asks.

Oh, fuck. He’s definitely fucking with you. Right? He has that goddamn smirk on his face, that one that makes your insides twist with a feeling reserved only for boys who look at you just like this, like you’re busted, like he knows exactly what you’ve been thinking about every second you’ve spent sitting next to him doing algebra. You want to kiss it right off of him.

“Nothing,” you lie, sitting up straight and trying to pretend like you really are interested in your studies. “Here, will you show me how to do it again?”

He calls your name. He doesn’t even have to ask for you to look at him; the tone of his voice and the tilt of his head makes his intentions entirely clear. When your eyes meet his he inches closer, and all you can manage to do is stare at his lips.

“Tell me what you want,” he demands, stern and warm enough to boil.

If he truly knew what he was asking for he wouldn’t be asking at all, you think. Not unless he was prepared for whatever your fervent need has in store for him. Embarrassment feels bright red and prickly on your skin. “I shouldn’t say.”

”But I think you should,” he whispers.

Oh. Oh. All bets are off, now. This has officially progressed from studying to “studying”.

Luigi lets you lead, his hand settling on the small of your back as you come a little closer to kiss him, properly. You hear him giggle before your lips meet; the curve of his smile against you is unmistakable, casting sparks through your body and down your thighs. He tastes like spearmint. You learn quickly that he is a fantastic kisser, and his tongue finds yours with curious excitement when your breathing starts to pick up. Without question, he claims the expanse of you, drinking in your essence, licking, biting. Those irresistible curls demand attention, and so you thread your fingers through his hair, your hand sweeping from behind his ear to the nape of his neck. Luigi shivers under your touch, exhaling softly against you.

When the fingers of his left hand raise to grasp your leg, you stop kissing him only to swing your body over his lap so that you’re straddling him. Luigi breathes in deep then, like his nervous system collectively seizes at the feeling of you so close. To give him room to breathe you stop short of settling all your weight onto him. Lips meeting once more, his hands greet your hips; his touch is warm, and timid, like you’re made of sand, like you might collapse and dissolve into immeasurable particles between his fingers.

He groans into your mouth. Murmurs your name. “This isn’t very productive,” he quips.

“Intellectually, no,” you agree, nails brushing the back of his neck. He has goosebumps. A ghost of a smile dancing on your lips, you slowly lower yourself down onto his lap; there are two layers of clothes between your bare skin but he is impossibly warm against you. “But what about physically?”

Luigi smiles, and fuck, he is too fucking beautiful. “I guess I can’t argue with that.”

And so you kiss him again and again and again, your heart doing backflips inside your chest when his big hands glide lower, and lower, thumb toying with the waistband of your skirt, and lower still, until he’s gripping your ass. You can’t help but nuzzle against the growing stiffness underneath you, poking between your thighs—and you definitely can’t help but love the way he grinds back, hips meeting yours with just as much enthusiasm. Fuck. About an hour ago you were working through polynomials and linear equations, and now the dreamiest guy you’ve ever met is hard for you, holding you in his lap. You might as well thank your professor.

When Luigi sucks at your bottom lip for a few euphoric moments, you make the most pathetic sound into his mouth, and he growls, his hands suddenly coming up to grasp your hips and hold them steady. “Was this your plan all along?” he rasps, his lips moving swiftly to the side of your face, your jaw, the junction between your neck and shoulder.

Sharp teeth graze skin and you whimper. “What do you mean?”

“What, now you’re playing coy?” Luigi finds the pulse point in your throat and bites, softly at first, then harder when your fingers curl into the hair at the back of his head. “You didn’t want to study. You called me because you wanted to get fucked, because you knew I’d want to touch you just like this, didn’t you?”

This boy is out of his mind. First he practically eye-fucks you while schooling you about imaginary numbers, and then he “scolds” you like he’s disappointed in your lack of interest in algebra, like he’s mad that you can’t resist him for being so damn gorgeous. That half-hearted meanness in his tone leaves butterflies in your stomach, in no way helped by the feeling of his tongue sliding over your collarbone.

“No,” you mutter. It’s not completely a lie. You really did need his help with the math, which he is really good at…but you can’t deny that you were really hoping you two would end up like this, with him kissing your neck all over until you’re speckled with purple and pink. You don’t even care about the obvious evidence of him on your skin—you want his entire dorm hall to know just how well-acquainted the two of you are by the time he’s done with you. The thought of everyone knowing you’re his makes you weak.

Luigi is kissing you again, slowly and deeply, one hand coming up to cup your breast through your shirt. His touch is too much and not enough simultaneously, your need overwhelming, and your hips are searching desperately for friction, rolling against him eagerly. So much for nonchalance.

He grasps your chin, firm but not at all painful, and flashes you that pretty smile, tutting, “I don’t believe you.”

Your mind is far too preoccupied with thoughts of his touch in other places to try to formulate a witty rebut. You opt instead to kiss him harder and sneak a hand between your bodies, tracing over his chest, down his carefully crafted abdomen, and then over the front of his shorts, groping his hard cock through polyester. Luigi groans into your mouth. He is big, almost intimidating, and imagining him inside of you has your body feeling hot all over.

As you palm the outline of his length through his trousers, his hands make their way underneath your sweater, the sudden warmth of him jolting through your torso. You look up at him through your lashes and he smirks.

“Do you want to sit on it?” he asks you, entirely stoic despite the weight of his words.

You kiss him, still squeezing his cock. “Can I put it in my mouth first?”

Fuck. You have him wrapped around your finger. How could he possibly say no when you ask so sweetly? Luigi is instantly pulling down his shorts for you, the rustle of fabric making your head spin. He’s left in just his boxers and a sweater that you quickly help him shrug off, too. Once you have him undressed, he takes a moment to survey you, your cheeks flushed, eyes lidded, hair tousled from his hands. You feel a surge of confidence now that you have his full attention and so you pull your top up and over your head, smiling when he reaches behind you to help you with your bra. He has it and your skirt off in just a few seconds, leaving your combined clothes to pile up next to the couch.

You shift so that you’re kneeling on the floor in front of him, wearing only your panties, watching him watching you. He is grinning, his cock standing proud, and you know you must be blushing by the way his teeth flash from under the curve of his lips. You feel gooey and hot in the pit of your stomach. Swallowing your shyness, you reach forward to take him in your hand. He’s already sticky at the tip, precum glistening on his slit, and so you begin to stroke him, starting at the head of his dick and spreading slick down his shaft. His cock is probably the most gorgeous thing you’ve ever seen, at the very least a runner-up for his face: tan and thick, his girth evenly distributed, and big enough to have you feeling your heartbeat between your legs. There is a prominent vein along the underside of him, ending at his frenulum. He pulses with each movement of your hand.

Once he’s as wet as you like, you come closer to tease him with your tongue, licking up the base, tracing his vein, passing over his slit. Luigi groans—“fuuuuuck, baby,”—and threads his fingers into your hair, tugging hard.

“Don’t be a fucking tease,” he rasps. “You asked for this. Show me what that mouth can do.”

Your lips are halfway wrapped around the head of him and when you moan at his words it vibrates through him, his abs flexing deliciously. You move further down, then, mouth closed around his length, applying light pressure on your way back up. He’s too big to take all of him at once and so your left hand grasps the length you can’t reach, pumping gently. You start a subtle, easy rhythm, evenly paced and obviously satisfying enough to have Luigi panting and swearing above you: your mouth starts at his tip, sucking gently, then gliding lower, until you can feel him in the back of your throat and you’re nearly gagging on him—and then you move upward again, cheeks hollowing around him, finally reaching the head of him once more. Rinse and repeat. It is organized. Formulaic. Your process leaves you practically drooling on his cock, spit collecting at the base where you are stroking him. Fuck. You haven’t pleased a guy like this in quite a while, and under any other circumstances you’d probably feel a bit insecure about your work; but it’s difficult to justify any doubts you might have, what with the noises coming from above you:

“Oh, fuck, yes, baby, yes, just like that, fuck yes,” Luigi moans, fingers knotted tightly in your hair. “Oh my god, your mouth…”

You slip your free hand into your panties, middle and ring finger rubbing your clit.

As your ministrations intensify, his reactions do, too. You can feel his thighs and hips tensing in an effort not to fuck into your throat. But you made a promise to yourself; you want to take the entirety of his length in your mouth before all of this is over, and so you move your left hand down to his balls, kneading him and carefully lowering your face until your nose is pressed into the curly hairs of his groin, his cock as deep as it can reach. And Luigi keens, head thrown back against the couch, one hand in your hair and the other gripping the armrest tight. You can feel him twitching in your throat.

There are a few blissful moments of you sucking him just like this, sinking him deep into your throat and pinching your lips around his tip, and you almost wish the two of you were recording because the sounds he makes are top tier jerk material for at least the next few months. He’d be a natural on camera. You want to commit every second of this to your memory.

When he goes quiet for a moment you open your eyes to look at him. You find him staring down at you, mouth agape. “Are you touching yourself?” he asks.

It’s difficult to answer with his dick in your mouth, so you settle for moaning around him again, eyes fluttering shut.

“Holy fuck,” he grunts, his voice sweeter than sugar.

You could sit here sucking him off for the rest of your life—you could die with his dick in your mouth—but you regrettably begin to feel your jaw aching, knowing full well that keeping this up will have you hurting. Not that you really mind. When you begin to sputter and tear up around him, he grabs both sides of your face and pulls your mouth off of his cock. You are crying, just a little, crocodile tears streaming down your cheeks, your throat raw.

Luigi looks down at you sweetly. “Oh, baby,” he coos, wiping your wet face dry with his thumbs. “That’s my perfect girl. So good to me. Come here.”

He welcomes you back onto his lap with open arms and a smile. He is warm, so warm and soft against you, you could fall asleep just like this. But he is kissing you now, so slowly that you feel dizzy, and so you ground yourself, fingers embracing his curls. His hands move to your hips, grasping the waistband of your panties, teasing you, rubbing the fabric against your heat. When he finally has them off his fingers are instantly examining you, collecting your slick, slipping through your folds.

“Let’s see about a little reward for you, hm?” he whispers, capturing your lips with his.

You kiss him eagerly and arch your back so that your thighs spread wide enough for his fingers to enter you with ease—not that it would be difficult without, considering that you’re so wet you can hear him touching you, even over the sound of your blood rushing in your ears. Two long digits move inside of you, stretching you, massaging that spot that makes your knees buckle and your eyes cross, plus a few more that you never knew existed. His touch feels so good, just how you imagined, and you have to lean forward into the crook of his neck to keep yourself upright, your teeth sinking into a firm shoulder. Luigi makes a gruff sound, almost a chuckle, and his cock jumps at your whiny, choked noises when he adds a third finger into your pussy.

“So needy, aren’t you?” he teases. “Have you been thinking about this, gorgeous? About sucking my cock and taking my fingers like this?”

You nod, because of course you have. In that exact order. Who wouldn’t?

Luigi smiles at you, soft and adoring. You make a curious sound and his fingers depart from you, lingering at your entrance until you grind down into his lap. Your cunt brushes against him, raw, hungry, slathering his cock with your slick.

“I want you,” you whine, grabbing his face and kissing him again. “I want all of you.”

“Yeah, baby?” His hands are guiding your hips, moving you slowly against him. “Tell me about it.”

Well, you would, if your brain weren’t short-circuiting at the moment. His fault. You mumble into his ear, something about infinity, something about the way you hug your pillow at night and all the times you’ve fucked yourself stupid thinking about this very image of you and him together like this. But there are countless words for your endless feelings, words you would preach to him from high places if your body had the agency to; your attraction to him is primal, but neatly arranged, layered, wrapped up with variables galore and multiplying with each moment you spend in his presence. A mess, no doubt about it, but one you can control, a tangle to unravel, an equation to solve. Nothing less. You aren’t sure of how this ends but you know that you need him, bad, more than you knew was possible before.

You crash into him, mouths colliding, everything that you left unsaid spilling into your embrace. Words are hard. Kissing Luigi and grinding your warm, throbbing cunt against him takes much less brainpower.

He is speaking to you when you pull away: “Baby, just a second, wait right here, let me get something.” Gently you are pushed from his lap and he disappears into his room momentarily, leaving you waiting, alone, aching for him, until he rounds the corner again with a familiar foil packet, finding his way back to the couch and sweeping you on top of him once more.

“Hi. Sorry.” And now he is fully yours.

You whine and wiggle against him the second the condom is on.

“Shh,” Luigi whispers, “I got you, ‘s okay, gorgeous. Gonna take good care of you, yeah? Don’t you worry. Gonna give you just what you need, baby.”

The tip of his cock is pressing into you, then, slowly easing himself inside, and fuck, he fits just right, fills you up perfectly, has you seeing stars already. The sound you make when he bottoms out is a hop, skip, and a jump away from pornographic. Luigi purrs underneath you.

“Oh, I know, baby, I know.” His hand slides down to grip your ass, spreading you, and from this angle you can feel just how much he stretches you out. And then, as he begins to roll his hips: “My sweet girl, working so hard, can’t even think for yourself, can you, beautiful? That’s okay, baby. I can do all the thinking for you, you just sit back and let me work it out for you, yeah? Don’t think. Just let me please this pussy.”

It’s like he’s trying to kill you. Every single word he says into your ear shoots straight to your cunt, the mere sound of his voice so near you electrifying. He’s deep, and with your thighs spread wide like this you just have to take advantage of the perfect angle to rub your clit against him. You can’t help but squeal into the crook of his neck each time his hips ram up into you, thighs clapping against your ass; by the way his muscles tense you assume it must take much of his energy, and yet he pounds you like you weigh nothing in his lap, exerting himself like it’s a cakewalk so long as he can watch your face shrivel up with overwhelming delectation. You can tell that he loves it when you tug his hair or bite him, and so you do it every chance you get, just in case your hushed utterances in his ear fail to make your message clear enough:

“Luigi, fuckfuckfuck, oh my god, oh, fuck…”

As he paces himself Luigi wraps his strong arms around you, one caging your waist and the other pulling tight at your hair. Your neck is arched and exposed, leaving him free to smother his love all over you in sharp, uneven hickeys. You needed this, so, so bad, and you tell him exactly that, chanting thank you, thank you, thank you and holding him tight.

“Whatever you want,” he whispers. “You can have whatever you want with me. Anything.” His lips meet yours, fleeting, and then, with the slightest hint of a grin: “You earned this, baby.”

You groan directly into his ear. It’s straight from your dreams, you think, like you’ve been swept from your bed in the midst of the night and dropped right here, in the lap of the sweetest, smartest, most handsome boy you’ve ever so much as looked at, bouncing on his cock while he kisses you like you’ll float away if he lets go. The two of you work together to heighten each other’s inevitable undoing, like a function of sorts; Luigi pushes and you push back, meeting his hips every time, your clit brushing against him just right, and him breaching unknown depths of you, hands roaming, learning you inside and out.

“My sweet girl,” he grabs your face and rests his forehead against yours, driving into you with precision. “This is all yours, baby.”

Sweat starts to gather at his hairline and you can feel him shuddering in your arms. Kissing him, you press down on his toned chest, pinning him against the couch, and Luigi is practically singing for you, little grunts and babys and murmurs of your name traveling through your ears and echoing in your mind. You want this to last forever. His hips slow to a stop when you begin to move on your own; you raise yourself up, resting all your weight on your knees, with him sliding out of your cunt until just the tip is still inside—and then you drop down, letting him sink back into you quickly, slick and smooth, his cock so deep you can nearly feel it in your stomach.

Fuck. You love this. You love the way his hands grip your ass, your thighs, rubbing your back, moaning your name and kissing behind your ear. You love the way he looks at you. The pupils of those dark eyes are blown wide, watching you move, worshipping how your tits bounce, the gyration of your hips, the blush of arousal all over you, your bottom lip wedged between your teeth. The sounds of sex and the shameless way he takes in every feature of your body have you feeling hot and ready to burst. You moan his name, drawn out and raspy.

“Yes,” Luigi groans. “You’re so pretty on top of me.”

Even through the haze of your pleasure you smile at his praise. He is telling you everything, every single thought that passes by in his mind, as if there will be no proof of how good he fucked you once you leave his dorm, as if every word will dissipate into thin air and leave you waiting, unsatisfied, hanging on the edge: “You take it so well, baby, my sweet girl, so perfect, so perfect just for me.”

His big hands are all over you. One cups your breast, sucking your nipple into his mouth, with the other splayed over your hip. You start to feel dizzy, anxious for his attention, a little bit crazy. Close. Luigi must notice the way your eyes screw shut and your pussy squeezes him tight, because his hand moves down your chest, over your stomach, and then to your clit, circling his fingers with purpose. He wishes—almost—that you were beneath him, so that he could replace his hand with his mouth, trace down your body with his lips and bring you to your very edge with his tongue, over and over again, until you’re begging him to stop.

He settles instead for kissing you, hard, slowly, lingering. “You have no fucking idea how bad I’ve been wanting this, baby.”

You nod, moaning, “yes, yes, me too,” your noises pained and rough in your throat.

The way his cock slams into you with each movement of your hips is ruthless, bruising; he’s kissing you so sweetly and you can feel your climax churning in your abdomen, rippling through you. It knocks the air from your lungs. Sex with him hurts so good. It’s like nothing you’ve ever felt before.

“Gonna come,” you huff. There are fingernail-sized dents in his skin. “Gonna come for you.”

Luigi nods, whispers, “good girl, such a good girl,” and circles his fingers over your clit as fast as he can manage.

You tense around him at that. You can’t even count how many times you’ve come imagining those very words whispered in your ear by the very man that you’re riding right now.

“Fuck,” he hisses. “Yeah? You like that? You like being a good girl for me?”

You nod wildly, and everything feels so real all of a sudden, like you’ve been floating mindlessly in space and you are crashing down into reality. His teeth dig into the sensitive skin of your neck and his hips start to pump again and by the time he’s meeting your thrusts you’ve had enough, thighs shaking, and he starts moaning into your ear so that you know he’s right there with you, and fuck, he’s really trying to kill you—

Your orgasm hits you like a truck. A 5’11, dark haired and brown eyed muscle truck that looks at you like you are the only good thing left in the world.

For a moment there is only your deep panting and his equally spent breaths as the both of you rest, his hand tracing gentle patterns on your back, yours combing through his sweat-soaked curls. The dorm is quiet, calm, almost with an air of innocence, completely unswayed by the heady aftermath of what the two of you just did right there on the couch. You lean back and look into his eyes, brooding and trained entirely on you. And he has that stupid grin on his face, the one that gives both of you away for good, the one that screams we’re not the only ones who know what we’ve been up to.

You want to kiss it right off of his beautiful, beautiful face. But right now you just sigh, lean into his shoulder, and let him hold you tight. Tonight you will walk back to your dorm, all the way on the other side of campus, where your roommates will be waiting for you, likely getting ready for bed. You will walk inside and they will watch you without a clue as to whose hands have been on you, whose name has been on your lips, whose cock has been buried to the hilt inside of you for the past hour. Your legs will be aching—you are sure of it.

Your roommates will ask you, “how’d it go?”, completely unaware of what your wobbly smile really means, how you really spent your time with your cute tutor.

And you will respond, “oh, great,” with a barely masked giggle. “I’m gonna ace my test tomorrow.”

^ dividers by cafekitsune

[evilminji]

Okay, so maybe it's just me? Projecting my new Tea Phase?

Cause for med reasons, no more energy drinks, only Teeeeeeaaaaa~☆

But honestly? Now that I am an adult and ACTUALLY KNOW HOW TO MAKE IT? Really digging it! Am enjoying the Teas. Mmmmmmm~ leaf broth. I like the fruity ones.

So! IMAGINE~☆ If you will:

Danny. 14 and his parents are LOUD AS FUCK (CRASH BANG SMASH BANG WHIIII-) dispite it being, once again, a school night. This has been going one For Years. That STUPID fucking machine. All God damned hours. Crashes and bangs and powertools. Explosions.

When will it ever end!

He's... he's honestly used it.

Unknowingly? This is is a skill that will come in handy later. Living and functioning while sleep deprived. Healthy? Fuck no. But it's USEFUL. He IS the ten year old downing Monster drinks in the parking lot before school.

It makes him a jittery weirdo. Twitchy. Too much caffeine, not enough sleep, his parents either blew up or TOOK APART the washing machine AGAIN. He... he never stood a chance. It's a miracle the indoor plumbing hasn't been compromised yet... AGAIN.

His blood is more sugar, caffeine, and guarana or whatever those other things in the can are, then actual human blood. He doesn't CARE. He just needs too get decent grades, graduate, and become an astronaut. It's... it's FINE. This is normal. They're FINE.

(If they weren't... someone would have noticed, right? Would have DONE something. Cared. So it HAS to be fine. His family's just weird. It's FINE.)

But THEN...

The Accident.

And his biology CHANGES. Green goo, wrapped vicious and loving, around his very DNA. Like Kintsugi of the body and soul. In green, Green, GREEN. It... it's a lot. Everything changing all at once. Maybe that's why it takes him so long to notice.

Why he thinks "oh, I'm just tired cause I'm running more then usual. Fighting and flying. Doing ghost stuff."

When... when honestly? Some part of him always kinda KNEW. From the very moment he stumbled out of the portal. The aftershocks. The pain. Sam and Tucker crying, scrambling to help him up the stairs. Sam tearing her bag apart looking for her cramps medicine. Because... because pain medication is pain medication.

"It's gonna be okay, Danny. Please. Please god, just take it! I promise it's gonna be okay!"

How do you look your panicked, crying, strongest-person-you-know best friend in the eyes and tell her... you can FEEL it dissolving in your throat. Like the pills were dumped in a human shaped pot of acid. That... that the pain isn't changing... and you... you don't think it's going too.

When you're scared. Might be dying. And you can already tell they think it's their fault. W... when you're all just KIDS. And all you can think is... you can let them know how bad... how bad it hurts...

They'd never be able to live with that knowledge.

Yeah. Yeah, Sam. Thanks. T... The pills helped a lot. He feels better. You really saved the day. He lo... loves you guys so much.

...

.....

He thinks about that moment A LOT. About how much he realized and knew, before the denial kicked in. Before he got so... Tired. Fresh of all that energy. And? You'd think he realize. The mood swings. The irritability. The headaches that disappear the SECOND he goes ghost. That he's in caffeine withdrawal. But? Nope.

He kinda blames the constant ghost attacks for distracting him.

But see... Sam? Doesn't drink tea. Goes against her diet. Tucker was where he GOT his illicit borderline illegal energy drinks. And his sister? Big on flavored sparkling waters. Which are gross to him.

His PARENTS drink a thick tar they insist is coffee. It might be liquid fudge. Zone knows its nearly the same consistency. It's horrifying. No thanks, he wants to LIVE.

It's? Ironically? Mr. Lancer and his constant detentions, that help Danny realize somethings up. Because Mr. Lancer shares. If he makes a cup for himself, he'll make one for you. It's how he was raised. And, yeah, the after school detentions? Those were herbal blends. No caffeine.

But...

But they tasted nice. Were warm. The classroom was quiet and as frustrating as it was? The tea itself? Was always... the one exception to how shit the situation was. So Danny finally broke down and asked about it. Learned Mr. Lancer knew a? Surprisingly LOT about tea. Huh.

Then one day he gets SATURDAY detention. Oh joy!

Bright and early. One of the few times he could be trying, desperately, to be sleeping through his parents cacophony. Catching up on his desperately needed Zzz's. Here he is... getting a handed a new cup of different tea?

Breakfast blend? And a bagel..

N...none hostile breakfast? A quiet space to catch up on his homework? No Dash? Just... just a quiet classroom, some tea, and the sounds on a peaceful morning outside?

......oh.

It's the best time he's had in school in... God, in YEARS. He gets so MUCH done. For once can concentrate. And? Actually, now that he thinks about it? Feels... awake? Or at the very least, not as sleepy. And being a Fenton, whom to the LAST are a genius if eccentric family, it's pretty damn easy to put two and two together.

Tea.

He felt more awake after having Lancer's breakfast blend tea.

He obviously asks about it. Then, after detention is done. Calm packs up. Goes home. Drops his back in his room. Goes ghost. And SHOOTS for the Far Frozen with his phone and an energy drink. Because clearly he's missing something and it's time to ask.

The good doctors of the Frozen are... gently horrified. Clawed hands steeples infront of their mouths as they try to tactfully figure out how to word "Great One, WHAT THE FUCK!?!? Why would you DO THIS TO YOURSELF!?" Because that... is not professional. Breathe. In, out, in, out. We can do this.

They get the most patient and restrained of their elders to... CALMLY, very VERY Calmly, ask some medical questions. Listen. Without judgements! Because they are medical professionals. Who do NOT want to scream, forever, into the void. Certainly not. So Calm! (They are going to BURN THAT CAN IN-)

Which! Huh. Yeah, that explains the constant exhaustion. He was poisoning himself. Kinda. Not so much the GHOST but the human half. Putting to much strain and too much trace chemicals, minerals, and buckets of sugar. General "mmmm :/ Don't Like THAT ™" energy from the Goo causing it too try and constantly burning it all out of existence. Endlessly.

The more he put in, the more there was to burn. The more there was to burn, the more tired he became. The more tired he became... well, the more he put in. It was a slowly lethal starvation cycle. Big Yikes.

The TEA on the other hand? Those are leaves. The good recognizes leaves and water. Other various plants, dried or otherwise. It ignores them as "fine" until they reach a "problematic" threshold, apparently? So... *blank look at the doctor*

*sighs in medical professional*

Tea? Good. Satan Can of Halfa Poison? Bad. Please drink tea.

👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻

And it's like MAGIC. He's suddenly BACK, baby! Ha ha ha! Skulker you fuckin THOUGHT?! Oh it's 2am? Well SUPRISE bitch! He's bright eyed and bushy tailed! His grades are up AND he's beating you like a drum! He has ice breakers for old people discussions now!! The local Tea Shops have NEVER been so well protected.

He actually manages to graduate with not just decent grades? But GOOD ones.

And the second. The INSTANT. He is legally his own man? Has his important paperwork squirrelled away and the go bags safely WELL outside of Amity. It's time. He meets OUTSIDE the house, because he's not an idiot. He's been practicing his Clones and has them ready to grab his parents so he can get out of there alive. Jazz is on video call from Star city.

His parents... suspected. Not at first, but as goofy as they are? They aren't ACTUALLY idiots. They've been watching, going over old research. Trying, failing, to get in touch with the League to have THEIR team test their research. Peer review is critical after all. They... they had been so certain. Are still somewhat certain.

But their research doesn't exactly ACCOUNT for this "halfa" phenomenon. So, there is a very real chance they are missing something. The one thing the DO know? Danny is their son. Stuck in some eternal mortally wounded state or not, he is a hero. And they weren't there for him.

They can't change their beliefs on a dime. But they've clearly missed a great deal. And refuse to fall to academic bias. The very thing that got them LAUGHED AT for decades. Mocked and belittled. This is their life's work. By God they WILL find out the truth.

It's? Better then he could have hoped. Not perfect. But better.

He helps set up safeties and a security check point at the portal. Both sides. He's kinda a big deal these days, mom, dad. Ghost scientists eager to work with them. A whole TEAM under their command. It certain endears ghosts to them a whole lot more. Then?

Copy of the blue prints, go bag turned into normal bags, Danny's off to college.

Bounces from major to major. Nothing really capturing his interest. As he aged, he's need less sleep. Gotten stronger. Grown into his father's height and grandfathers build. Tucker keeps calling him a dorito. Danny retaliates with Ancient Egyptian Cyber/Pharoah Twink allegations. According to SAM they are both dumbasses.

She's not WRONG... but hey D:<

Eventually? A really niche botany seminar run by Pamela Isely catches the attention of Tucker, who forwards it to him n Sam. Nice ™. It's being held in her Murder Park! Cool! Obviously they have to go. So off to Gotham they go. And? When they get there? Sam is APPALLED.

She may HATE landlords as much as the next activist.... but LOOK at all these run down, foreclosed, rotting buildings! Beautiful gothic infrastructure! Those could be businesses or homes! Danny, busy with signing them up, makes the mistake of tuning her out as she rants in fury. She does this some times. Needs to vent. Uh huh, you're very right. You should contact somebody. I agree. Mmmhmmm.

Hey, Sam, Ms. Isely needs your-....

Sam?

Oh FUCK ™.

By the time the Seminar come around? Sam has violently kicked in the door of more then a feel reality offices. Owns QUITE a few buildings. Danny is sweating. She... she's doing the THING again. The "gimme your Ghost Crew, I KNOW you have a highly specific Ghost Crew, don't you DARE lie to me or I take your knee caps, Danny" stare.

>.> Sam you can't keep doin- *stare intensifies* Yes Ma'am. *Pulls out Fenton phone* and so? Here come the renovation crew. The ONLY honest building Crew in all of Gotham. They cut no corners. Can't be threatened. Gangs, villians, and even local government office try to arrange... accidents on the build sites.

Nothing. Nada. In fact, it turns out more dangerous for THEM then this crew of outsiders!

Wtf!

Then? After these two College age weirdos finish Poison Fuckin Ivys HIGHLY SUSPECT biology seminar? Manson fucks off to who knows where! Leaving what HAS to be "the muscle" behind. Cause I mean? Look, at the guy! He's huge! And what does he do?

Goes building to building. Rents them out to low income families. Honest, hard working shop keepers. And? Eventually decides to settle smack dab in the middle of Gotham, in the shadow of Wayne fuckin tower, spitting distance from the Space museum..... and open? A tea shop? The FUCK?

"The Zone".

In a weird shade of green. With little ghosts, wearing crowns, because and I quote "it's funny"? Certainly crazy enough for Gotham. But like, it's loud as FUCK here. Crowded. There are gas attacks and shit. It'll never las-....

It stays untouched for MONTHS.

Sometimes being the ONLY building near it to be untouched. Gas NEVER getting in. The damn place a BUNKER. And? Despite looking like it's two floors? It's three. You enter and your actually on the second floor. No one's even sure where the fuck the guy LIVES, since he never seems to leave.

Not only THAT. But it... it's like one of those old school apothecaries. Big ol bank of drawers. Guy'll mix up your blend for you right as you watch. Tea nuts are actually risking COMING to Gotham to try his stuff. Writing articles. Apparently he has some pretty rare shit in those drawers.

Some UNKNOWN shit, according to one guy on ViewTube.

There's this whole debate on if it's Ultra Super Rare or that means it's just super cheap knock off crap. Some of them he won't make for people, even if they ask. There's a rumor it's for Meta's with specific diets. Or alien blends. But no one can verify that. Cause like?

Anyone who tries to cause trouble?

Can't fucking FIND the place. And if you're already inside? You just... drop. Stone cold unconscious. It's definitely magic but no one knows if it's HIS or Manson's? You know? He won't talk. Gets annoyed when harrased.

Which off course!

Leaves Only ONE gentleman for the job. An elite special forces trained expert. Polite, dignified, enjoyer of fine Teas. Alfred "Why do you chucklefucks keep forgetting I was in the Queens Service and a Registered Badass" Pennyworth.

After all! He DOES have the days shopping to do.

@babbling-babull @the-witchhunter @hdgnj @legitimatesatanspawn @lolottes

[maybanksprincess]

I think about Jj with a borderline sex addict girlfriend a lot…too much. She is always tugging at his arm to pull him away or whispering in his ear as she plays with his shorts. And even tho he pretends to be annoyed while tugging her to the twinkie or even just the most closed off spot they can find to put her in her place, he actually loves it and lives for the thrill she brings him.

THIS IS LITERALLY ME.

sex addict!reader always makes jj stay home from functions, or bonfires because shes horny, and cant be away from him for even a few hours.

sex addict!reader always watching jj get ready to go out with the pogues, just to rip it back off him when hes finished getting dressed, cause he just looks so good.

sex addict!reader tugging him away at the beach to a secluded area when she sees the way the sun illuminates his toned abs and biceps.

sex addict!reader pinching jjs arm when shes horny, to let him know to wrap up whatever conversation they're having at the moment.

[destinygoldenstar]

”Gangle is a sociopath in Episode 4. She’s the reason things went wrong and everyone hated their experience and her.”

And to that I say…

YES. YOU ARE CORRECT.

She does do a lot of messed up stuff in the episode. Being bossy, disregarding her workers health and feelings, outright enslaving Jax and attempting to brainwash him… yeah it’s not good.

Even if you hate Jax and think he deserves it, you gotta admit Gangle didn’t have to be this cruel about it.

”…and that makes Gangle a villain.”

THAT is the part I have to respectfully disagree with.

Gangle is very sympathetic. She is treated terribly by everyone throughout the show, and when she finds someone that does treat her well, she questions how genuine it is.

There’s also her clear mental disorders, bipolar, borderline personality, autism (that one technically isn’t a disorder), depression, whichever one you see and view it as.

She came from an environment that not only crushed her, but told her she had to wear a mask to function. She’s tried to fix it so she can function in the circus too, but nothing has worked. Because sometimes it’s not that simple. Sometimes treatments don’t work for a person. And it’s extremely hard to find something that works.

So I, as well as others, sympathize with Gangle, and her behavior is very well explained.

BUT, THERE’S STILL NO EXCUSE.

Yes she’s sympathetic, but that shouldn’t excuse her actions at all.

That’s why there’s ONE LITTLE THING that prevents me from saying Gangle is a bad person.

It’s NOT because she’s sympathetic.

It’s because SHE TAKES ACCOUNTABILITY.

She was given the opportunity to pin the blame on someone else. But she chose not to.

She took accountability that she was responsible, messed up, and confessed that she broke.

And she gets consequences for it by having her score docked.

It really PROVES that she is capable of acknowledging when she’s in the wrong.

And she says this AGAIN by confessing she messed up and hurt the people around her.

And the story doesn’t excuse her, either. It’s not brushing off what she did as a joke and nothing else.

Zooble and Pomni both consider what she’s going through and offer help.

But neither of them ever excuse what Gangle does or coddle her.

Both of them just offer help when they see she needs it. (Gangle just shows more appreciation to Zooble cause she knew Zooble longer)

Regardless if Jax and Ragatha forgive Gangle or not, there’s people that do.

They don’t help because it’s ‘not as bad as you think it is’. They help because they sympathize and understand.

That’s a major difference. I would look back at the scenes I screenshot here to understand what I’m talking about.

[littlelovelunette]

hihi! bit of a self indulgent comfort rq,, (tw for self harm)

could you do ambessa x reader, with r being addicted to sh? as in they dont function well if they haven’t sh’d in too long, even getting borderline hostile to anyone trying to stop them. i totally get that this is a pretty heavy rq so there’s pressure if you’re uncomfy with it! either way, thanks so much :)

Addicted

—Ambessa Medarda x Self harm Addicted!Reader

Self harm. Comfort. Low-key ass, forgive me...

The marks that covered your arms were a far cry from how you were really feeling at the moment— terrible. The self-loathe that filled your chest refused to leave no matter how many cuts you dug into your wrists.

Now, the white marbled floors were stained with your crimson blood, and you hated this. You needed to clean up before Ambessa got back from her little meeting she'd called last moment with the soldiers.

The door opened and closed somewhere in the bed chambers and your heart was in your throat. You scrambled to lock the bathroom door, locking yourself inside. You looked back at the little puddle of blood, drops of red following where you'd made for the desperate little sprint.

You sighed.

When had things gotten so bad? Well, it had started slow and now all you could focus on was the stinging of the knife cuts on your arms, the blade laid on the floor as if mocking your self destructive behaviour.

Ambessa deserves better than you. Why are you taking up space in her life? You think she yearns to wake up everyday and see your face? Your tired, crusty face? Why? Why? Ambessa Medarda. She deserves so much better.

You took a deep breath and walked upto the wash basin, opening up the cabinet overhead and taking out some antiseptic and gauge. You could hear Ambessa's heavy feet padding about the room outside. “Where are you, dollface?”

Hell, I hope.

You hissed in pain, silent and soft. “I'm in here!” You called out and quickly got some cotton swabs to clean your wounds.

“Open the door, dearest,” Ambessa said, voice holding a patient undertone.

“In a bit, baby!” you grabbed some paper napkins, trying to clean the blood off the floor.

“No, open it now.” Ambessa said, voice stern.

She's so tired of dealing with you.

Ambessa's knocking calmed down and for a second, there was no knocking. Your confused eyes gazed at the door, “Bessa—” the door slammed open, the lock breaking off it's place. You yelped softly, landing on your butt. You stared at the doorway where Ambessa now stood, tall and mighty.

Ambessa walked upto you, “What's this, babygirl?”

“I’m sorry, I just can't… not do this,” you answered, sniffling and looking away.

“No,” Ambessa sunk to her knees, bringing you closer to herself.

You scooted back, trying to get away from her as you held your bleeding wrists. You stared at her with a sort of fear she hadn't seen before. Ambessa's mouth opened, a whisper lingering at the tip of her tongue— words of comfort really.

Ambessa tried to come closed, “Don't touch those—”

You squeezed your wrists further, yelling at her, “STAY AWAY!” You sobbed, throat sore from screaming as loud as you did.

“Sweet girl, just come,” she said, muscular arms opening, a warm hug awaiting you a few feet away.

“I…” your breath came out in small cold puffs, goosebumps rising on your skin.

You wanted to badly hit Ambessa. You didn't want her comfort. You just wanted to continue cutting. Your fingers curled around the plastic handle of the knife.

“Please…”

“Baby…” Ambessa swallowed, hands dropping by her sides.

Ambessa watched as you recoiled from her. Blood dripped from your deep cuts, staining your clothes and the floor further.

“I'm sorry, I'm sorry—” you shook from the pressure of your sobs.

Ambessa's arms closed around you, bringing you in a warm, sweet hug. You could smell the gentle perfume on her, it's soothing in a strange way, “I want you…” you whispered, bleeding arms wrapping around you.

“I'm right here,” Ambessa said softly, “I'm not leaving ever.”

[moralityandmusings]

Peter in Gotham: Nice Try, Though.

Listen, Peter knows he's being kind of an asshole. Maybe blame the Trauma or the fighting literal middle aged homicidal maniacs at 15 years old or, most likely in this specific case, the fact that he somehow got transported to a city that smells worse than the Hulk's armpit on a bad day. But you cannot blame a guy for seeking out the one thing that brings a modicum of joy to his life in the middle of what are honestly some of the worst few months he's ever had. So when Signal, for the second time this patrol, tries to inch his way onto the rooftop about five feet behind Peter, well... Peter does what brings him joy.

"Hood tried that same tactic last week. Didn't work then either." Peter would never admit out loud that he's smirking under his mask. Behind him, he hears Signal groan then shuffle forward to sit on the rooftop beside him, all attempts at stealth out the window.

"How do you do that!? Seriously!? It was funny the first few times you did it to B and Robin, but Every. Single. Time? From all of us?" Peter lets out a brief chuckle. "Maybe you guys should train harder."

An affronted gasp is ripped out of the other hero. "Trai- Train harder?! How dare you? Our training was the actual best, some of us were even trained by literal assassins. It's not our fault you seem to have some... some sixth sense for when we're nearby!" Peter let out a full laugh at that.

When he'd landed in Gotham initially, he'd been shocked and confused. It didn't take long for Karen to connect him to the internet and for him to realize he was not in Kansas anymore. Kansas being New York, or... Oscorp? Depends on how you want to look at it. New York if the city, the Oscorp 16th floor laboratories if you want to get the picture. You know what, this is too much info, you get the picture.

When he realized Gotham had heroes already, he looked into the politics of it all. He knew powered people were not always welcome (he'd dealt with enough rants from Wade about the X-Men mutant rights campaign to get a clue), so he dug deeper into this universe/dimension/whatever you want to call this Not New York and Not Oscorp place. What he found was contradictory and borderline laughable. The Batman, cryptid protector of Gotham, had seemingly instigated a No-Meta's rule for the city, but one of his affiliated heroes within Gotham was a person with powers. Also, he regularly teamed up with powered individuals when working alongside the Justice League, which he'd co-founded. So, Peter felt pretty confident that if he let himself get introduced to the Bats early on he would be safe here. And he was right. He hopped back into the friendly-neighborhood habits in the rougher parts of town (seriously, who has a whole section of a city called "Crime Alley"), and within a few days he found himself in the presence of not one, not two, but three Bats, including the big Bat himself. He had been debating pretty regularly with himself about how much to reveal and. the mechanics of dimension travel and not wanting to break or alter any timelines, blah, blah, blah. But when it came down to it, there had been no alerts or ringing from his Spidey-Sense other than a buzz to let him know they were closeby. As soon as he turned around to greet them, the buzz died down entirely.

So he told them everything except his name. He was honest. He even told the Bat that they were welcome to take a blood sample to see he wasn't lying about not having a Meta gene and that he was just a regular old lab experiment gone wrong. He was entirely unsurprised when they did take one, but he was sort of surprised that when they asked for his name and he told them that he wouldn't give them one, they only asked "why?" instead of immediately attacking him. And Peter was honest again. He was a functional adult, he had the means to create himself a fake ID and documents, and he wanted to establish himself in Gotham for whatever amount of time he was stuck there. Where he came from, identities were earned and he had been burned before because of it. He was in a new place with new dangers and the last thing he needed while trying to get his feet under him were outside forces (AKA Bats) meddling in his personal life and making it harder for him, even if unintentional. They'd get his name in time, but they'd have to earn his trust, just like he would be working to earn theirs.

The Bats hadn't loved that answer (shockingly), but they only asked for his name a few more times before dropping it entirely when he refused to budge. The constant questions had quickly moved to his powers after that though. Peter hadn't minded sharing, as his potential teammates would be better equipped to work with him in the field if they knew what he was capable of. He did however, by genuine accident, leave out his Spidey-Sense when listing them. And rather than add it on later, he quickly realized that it was a small source of entertainment that didn't cause any true harm.

And within about a week after those power-related questions started, a bet was made between the Bats. In all the times they had met with Peter, not a single one could sneak up on him. Not Dick, not Jason, not even Damien or Cass! So, as siblings do, they made a bet. Whoever could sneak up on Peter and tap him on the shoulder without being spotted or acknowledged first would get a whole batch of Alfred's cookies to themselves. Peter knew the prize, and he sure as hell wasn't going to make it easy on them.

"Yeah, it's a sixth sense alright." He chuckles. "I told you guys I had heightened senses. I can hear you coming from several blocks away, even further if I'm actually listening out for you. You guys will just have to be stealthier." Peter shrugged jovially.

Signal grumbled to himself over that. "Stealthier, he says. Well, how do you suggest we do that?" Signal leans forward on the edge of the roof to try and catch Peter's line of sight. "Well, you can start by telling Red Robin that changing his patrol times just to pair up with you in an attempt to use you to distract me would work a lot better if I couldn't hear his cape scraping against the railings on the fire escape steps just now." Signal reeled back in shock as a plethora of curses rang out from the fire escape behind their backs, prompting Peter to chuckle again. "Nice try, though."

[ssa-dado]

Breaking down Hotch's apartment layout until someone from Criminal Minds slides into my DMs with the damn floorplans

- CASE BRIEFING: HOW HOTCH'S APARTMENT GASLIT US ALL

As an architecture student, I have a very strong (borderline obsessive) interest in analyzing spaces and locations... especially when they don’t quite add up. And one that has always messed with my brain (sometimes in a good way, but mostly in a frustrating way) is Hotch’s apartment from seasons 4–11.

The transformation from the bare, depressing space in s5 to the warm, cozy atmosphere with antique furniture and clever spatial tricks later on… it’s fascinating.

But also confusing as hell.

Because one question has always haunted me:

Is the apartment we see in Season 4/5 (where Hotch was stabbed and possibly SA’d) the same one he’s living in by Season 10?

(And since I’m a visual learner, here are the pics, because this mystery needs solving... I'll try my best)

(05x01 ; 10x05 don't zoom in, you freaks)

Seems easy to solve, right? The civil number is the same! Great.

121

...But hold on - what’s this?

(07x23)

...Damn, Aaron, your mailman must be going through it - 121? 123? Pick a struggle.

So… is it the same apartment or not? Because at this point, I’m losing my mind.

- VICTIMOLOGY (TYPOLOGY)

As you all know, the starting point is always victimology—but in architecture, my go-to is typology.

So, what kind of apartment building does Hotch live in?

Because once we figure that out, we can finally make sense of all the architectural crimes committed in his apartment.

We get a glimpse of his building in 5x02, and - without dragging you through a full historical deep dive (unless you want me to, in which case, buckle up) - here’s what we do know: it looks like this...

The building looks pre-WWII, likely built in the late 1920s–1930s, or designed more recently to mimic that era.

My guess is primarily based on the architectural detailing of the ground floor - the stonework, arches, and classical elements that give it a grander, more “expensive” look - and the distinct visual separation from the upper levels.

Spencer Reid moment - you can skip it if you'd like -> This actually follows a common design principle (partly influenced by Louis Sullivan’s theories) where different sections of a building reflect their function. The ground floor, being more public-facing, is more decorative and inviting, while the upper floors (where the apartments are) are plainer, emphasizing privacy.

However, the upper levels look stripped down, almost too plain, like they went through a more recent renovation that removed some of the og character. While it was normal in the 1920s/30s to emphasize the lower level, the upper floors would still have had some kind of textured finish brick, terracotta, or even decorative stone accents. Instead, here, it looks like someone just painted over everything... a bit sad, honestly… much like the man living in one of these apartments. Sorry Hotch but it is the truth.

That said, based on the photos, I hypothesized a possible volumetry diagram and main floor plan of the apartment building, including its functions and layout.

Knowing that Hotch lives in 121 (or 123… whatever it is today), he could very well be on the first floor. Old man isn’t about to risk climbing seven flights of stairs, understandable.

(Or, if we lean into the conspiracy theory that he has childhood trauma related to fire, it’s very telling that he chose a first-floor unit, making for an easier escape in case of danger…)

Our lovely Emily Prentiss gave us a sneak peek at the ground floor interior in 5x01, which - combined with a study of the window placement on the facade - helped me piece together a small section of the central layout.

From what we see, I feel even more confident about the building’s era - especially because of the beautiful wooden decorated elevators (yes, those are elevators, not doors... check the buttons on the side)

And now, for another Spencer Reid moment, part two -> In the early 1900s, when elevators were first being introduced in residential buildings, they didn’t look like the modern ones we see today.

Why?

Because men fear change.

Just like with any new technology, people were hesitant, so architects and designers made elevators blend in by disguising them as something more familiar - often looking like grand wooden doors or classic entryways rather than the industrial metal boxes we think of today.

This same pattern happened with building structures - steel (and concrete too!) was widely adopted in the early 1900s because of its strength, allowing for taller buildings, but architects still hid the steel frame behind stone or brick facades to maintain the look of traditional palaces. Even early cars looked like carriages because people weren’t ready to embrace a completely new form.

So, Hotch’s apartment building? It’s yet another classic case of early 20th-century architectural reluctance to embrace modernity - which, honestly, fits him a little too well. The man bottles up his emotions behind the calmest face just like his home hides its innovations behind classic detailing.

I see you, Aaron. You’re not fooling me.

Now, you may be asking - "Phi, weren’t you supposed to expose all the inconsistencies in Hotch’s apartment and finally solve whether it’s the same place or if they changed it?"

To that, I say… we’re getting there.

Because before we dive into the madness, there’s something that really messes with my brain - the window placement in Hotch’s apartment.

But to even begin analyzing that, we first need to understand how a typical floor plan in a building like this would be structured. And once again, our queen Emily Prentiss in 5x01 unknowingly led us straight to the answer.

The bastard even has a vaulted ceiling - right where I believe the main distribution area (aka elevators and stairs) is located. You can spot it in the pictures near the exit signs.

Also, just a heads-up... in the diagrams, the apartments look smaller than they actually are because I was too lazy to make multiple detailed drawings. (But hey, if someone paid me - hi, CM - I absolutely would) So, for now, I’m using that as a quick reference.

Now… the interior! Or should I say… the everchanging interior.

In this issue, I’ll be analyzing the Season 5 version - I even sketched out a small section of the floor plan (which could be completely wrong, because things change every episode).

From these pics, we can see that his windows are on the opposite side of the entrance - which, so far, checks out.

But wait... look down here! Check out the window placement in the kitchen. Thanks to that little detail, we can hypothesize that Hotch’s apartment is located in what I’ve labeled as "Unit B" - aka the unit with double exposure (great for ventilation, Aaron, solid choice).

From this pic down here from the s4 finale, we also get a fun little bonus detail - there’s what looks like a tiny dryer (or washing machine?) just sitting out in plain sight. And right behind Hotch, there’s a door that, based on the dimensions, I suspect leads to a bathroom.

Enough details to sketch out a partial floor plan… and there you have it!

A (partial) floor plan of Hotch’s apartment in its saddest era: bare, empty, and drowning in case files from seasons 4–5

And seeing more of his apartment in later seasons should be a blessing, right? It should help us map out the whole thing, right?...

Right?

...Wait.

Is that... a full-ass door on the right that totally wasn’t there before?!

Aaron, you hypocrite - you shut down Spencer Reid’s physics magic, yet here you are summoning entire new rooms into existence in your apartment.

(05x02 ; 10x05)

Alright, fine... where does that door lead?

(10x20)

Hot damn.

Referring to the home office, of course… and here’s some solid proof of its placement. Now, I’m gonna… step away for a minute… process... this... architectural betrayal… but YOU - you make sure to study these pics. I’ll be quizzing you later, got it?

Alright… and now… now that you’ve hopefully been studying (and totally not getting distracted by Hotch’s shirt hanging on for dear life - OMG LOOK AT THE [REDACTED])… focus.

You nasty.

Window placement.

Where’s the home office window? Exactly... on the same side as the others in the living and dining area (you can tell by the way the light enters the room in the pic on the right)

And since you’re all very interested in the architecture (and definitely not drooling over a certain Unit Chief), let me ask you this:

WHY THE HELL IS THERE A WHOLE FIREPLACE IN HIS HOME OFFICE?!

Don’t worry - I’ll answer for you. Since y’all are nasty.

Can I just say that it UPSETS ME to the point where I’m considering a 30-day diet of just drywall that THAT MAN - THAT FEDERAL AGENT - HAS A FIREPLACE. IN HIS HOME OFFICE.

(HELLO?!?!?!?!?? Whore.)

Unhinged. Because:

1. A fireplace is quite literally a symbol of family and warmth (fun fact: Frank Lloyd Wright always designed homes starting with the fireplace! Oh, wait. You might not know who that is, so now this just sounds confusing. My bad. Anyway, he designed a lot of cool stuff... moving on). A fireplace belongs in a living room or dining area, where people actually gather. And considering Hotch’s building is old, there is no way it was originally designed to have one in a private office. That placement is categorically wrong. You’re a terrible designer if you stick a fireplace in an isolated office but not in the main living space where it actually makes sense.

2. The writers could try to lie to my face and say, “Oh, maybe the room was repurposed into Hotch’s home office.”Wrong. His apartment has a big open-concept living/dining area with the kitchen on the side. And unless his place is secretly Rossi’s mansion (spoiler: it’s not), there’s no way the original layout had a separate formal dining room. And even if it did, the fireplace is still in the wrong damn place because formal dining rooms are typically closer to the entry.

3. They could lie even harder and try to argue that Hotch having a fireplace in his office is some deep, symbolic artistic choice - like, oh, he’s so devoted to his job, he’d rather warm his ass doing paperwork than sit by the fire reading Jack a bedtime story like a decent human being. Like. Come on. He’s a family man, for god’s sake. Either give him a properly placed fireplace or JUST DON’T GIVE HIM ONE AT ALL.

(Less is more, people!!! Unless, of course, we’re talking about Hotch’s [REDACTED]... oof. Damn censorship. Right when I was about to say something deeply unholy. )

Goodbye. See you in the next issue.

Hopefully by the end of this series we'll manage to sketch down the entire floorplan

Phi.