#trauma-informed

[the-perennial-wallpaper]

Empathy is not compassion.

As adults, looking through a trauma-informed lens, we do not want to be empathetic.

Empathy is feeling with the person. Empathy leads to burnout, bad boundaries, and can be unsafe.

We need to be compassionate. Understanding that people can be experiencing something, but this does not mean that we need to experience it with them. We can simply exist beside them to support them.

[info-copa]

Trauma-Informed Programming

Trauma is described by the CAMH as “the lasting emotional response that often results from living through a distressing event” such as sexual assault, violence, an accident, or a long term, repeated pattern such as childhood abuse (sexual, physical, emotional), sex trafficking, war and displacement, discrimination, and incarceration.

When we consider rates of interpersonal violence as well as discrimination and inequity in our society, it may not be surprising that some estimates suggest that over 75% of Canadian adults have experienced significant trauma in their lifetimes, including adverse childhood experiences, or ACEs. ACEs include traumas sexual and physical abuse, neglect, or family instability due to divorce, suicide, incarceration, or parents or caregivers with substance abuse or mental health issues. Research shows that between half and two thirds of Canadians have experienced one or more ACEs before the age of 18.

A traumatized individual (survivor) can suffer for a lifetime from repercussions of the loss of personal power, control and agency, and their ability to trust or feel safe. They are also more vulnerable to chronic disease, anxiety and mental health issues, loss of cognitive function, and behavioural problems. ACEs can affect brain development and future educational and employment opportunities, cause lifelong depression and relationship issues, and increase vulnerability to ongoing trauma such as sex trafficking.

Considering the toll of trauma on individuals, families, the workplace, and communities, it is no wonder that we hear the term “trauma-informed” more and more often to describe health care practices, therapies, even leadership models that recognize and seek to accommodate survivors of trauma.

But for the COPA National team, being trauma-informed is not a new approach at all, as our organization was founded almost 30 years ago on the principles of trauma-informed practice. To this day, all our programming and resources are still developed and delivered with a trauma-informed approach.

The origins of our approach were a disturbing event in the late 1970’s in Columbus, Ohio. When a 7-year-old girl was raped, the local school and community were thrown into turmoil. Shocked, disturbed, and frightened, the community was desperate to prevent this from ever happening again. Community members approached the local sexual assault centre (Women Against Rape) and asked them for help. Workers from the centre rallied to help the community find answers and created a school-based program called the Child Assault Prevention (CAP) Project. The CAP Project was so innovative and successful that it spread quickly across the United States, throughout the world, and into Canada.

Today, COPA National is one of 4 CAP projects in Canada, and is also a regional CAP training centre. We have been using this unique and effective prevention curriculum since COPA was founded in 1995, in schools, community organizations, and the wider communities. Using CAP as inspiration we have developed a range of resources and programs for different groups - including immigrants and refugees. The CAP Project is the cornerstone of all of COPA National’s programs. Its unique vision, principles, and approach are at the core of our resource development.

Fundamental to CAP’s vision of violence prevention is the recognition of assault as a violation of human rights, expressed through the assertion that all people and all children have the right to be “safe, strong and free”. This basic premise underpins the foundational principles that form the basis of the CAP Project:

Prevention starts with breaking the silence and secrecy and debunking the myths surrounding violence against children, women, and all marginalized groups.

Effective prevention strategies address the social roots of violence: inequity and hatred.

People and communities have the right to information, skills and resources that will enable them to take back their power through capacity building.

These principles and approaches dovetail with the 6 guiding principles of a trauma-informed approach offered by SAMHSA's National Center for Trauma-Informed Care in the United States:

Safety

Trustworthiness and transparency

Peer support

Collaboration and mutuality

Empowerment, voice, and choice

Acknowledgement of cultural, historical, and gender issues

How is COPA National’s programming trauma-informed?

COPA National’s approach to the development of programming and resources reflects our care for the individual and their experiences and at the same time addresses social, institutional, and systemic issues. Designed to mitigate harm to the survivors of trauma, they are, in fact, welcoming and inclusive practices that work for all humans. We are creating spaces where marginalized people and ALL people are seen and heard and have a voice – or in other words, where all children, and all people, have the right to be safe, strong and free.

Below is a brief discussion of how we continue to incorporate trauma-informed principles into our prevention programming. COPA National also strives to espouse these principles internally within the organization to ensure coherence between what we practice and what we preach.

Our programming is rooted in awareness of the factors that increase vulnerability to assault, aggression, discrimination, child abuse, and other traumatizing events

The strong theoretical framework that underlies and informs COPA National’s programming is what makes it so unique and powerful.

We believe that lack of power—social or personal—underlies all situations involving assault, which is by definition an abuse of power. Inequities and exclusion increase vulnerability to assault, triggering and perpetuating a cycle of violence against children, women, and all other marginalized social groups. Strategies for assault prevention are only effective when they promote equity and inclusion by facilitating the individual and collective empowerment of socially marginalized groups and individuals.

We recognize and make linkages in our programming between the different types of violence and harassment that members of marginalized social groups (children, women, LGBTQ2+, IBPOC, etc.) experience every day, and that are normalized.

Our understanding is that trauma is widespread and that those affected by it are everywhere, including in our workshops and trainings. Thus, every time we work with a group of people, we ensure that we actively recognize the presence of survivors and take their experiences into account.

Psychological and Physical Safety

Safety is key to a trauma-informed approach.

In COPA National programs, we begin to create psychological safety at the start of every workshop by generating a set of agreements with participants - children, youth, and adults. Participants identify their needs for a safe environment and commit to:

fostering a positive and inclusive space for LGBTQ2S+

respecting what others say

practising non-judgment,

listening when others speak

holding in confidentiality what others share

We continue by recognizing that survivors may be present, and naming their courage. We acknowledge that some topics we will discuss may be difficult and may elicit painful emotions, while emphasizing that we will also focus on positive strategies for prevention. We encourage those who feel the need to seek support, either from COPA National facilitators or from services in the community.

We ensure the physical safety and well-being of survivors by:

arranging in advance with schools that kids who are triggered by the content in the workshops have permission to leave in order to protect themselves.

ensuring there are at least 2 facilitators in every workshop or training: one to facilitate, and one to observe and offer support to those who are visibly triggered by the content of the workshop.

inviting participants to speak with us at the end of workshops, providing an opportunity for them to access support and resources. COPA National facilitators have all received empowerment-based crisis intervention training offered in-house and are up to date with what resources exist so that they can link those who need them with the appropriate resources.

Collaboration

Active listening is foundational to everything we do. Whether we are facilitating discussions or providing support to individuals during program implementation, we listen deeply to the stories of those who have experienced assault and trauma. New programming and resources are created in consultation with them and adapted according to their feedback. We know that listening, consulting, and integrating them within our programs is part of the healing process for survivors of trauma.

For example, A Circle of Caring and Joining the Circle, toolkits intended to foster the well-being of First Nations, Métis and Inuit students at home and at school, were developed by COPA National in grassroots collaboration with Indigenous communities all over Ontario. We sought the wisdom and guidance of people and groups from different communities, and met with hundreds of family and community members, and leaders. It was important to us to ensure that the content in the toolkits was what was needed by the communities and that it was also responsive to the context of historical and cultural trauma.

Another example of this type of collaboration is Virtu-elles, COPA National’s cyber-violence prevention program, an online workshop developed in consultation with witnesses and survivors of online violence against women and with front-line workers from women’s organizations.

Our Whole School Prevention program Change Our World is part of a repertoire of educational resources to promote equity and inclusion. It was developed through a consultation process with a wide range of equity-seeking individuals and organizations. Change our World also includes a consultation process with each school we work with. A committee of allies is created within the school to assist the change process. In this way, we not only recognize and elicit the experience and knowledge of those within the community, but we deepen the potential for ongoing and transformational change by leveraging allies of this change.

Yet another example of this is in our role as provincial coordinators of Ontario’s Francophone network of Settlement Workers in Schools (TÉÉ). When creating the conditions of success in schools for new arrivals, we form committees of student allies within the schools we work with that include those who have already gone through the experience of being a new arrival.

COPA National approaches program delivery as an ongoing and never-ending consultation. Our contact with students, parents and guardians, teachers and other schools staff represents a precious opportunity to listen and learn about their experiences and to identify emerging issues.

And fundamental to how we work and how we view things at COPA National, is our belief that kids have much to contribute, and wisdom to share with us. We share power with kids, and we recognize their knowledge and elicit their wisdom. We also model this way of being to the adults we work with.

Capacity Building

We believe that certain social factors such as a lack of information, dependence, and isolation, make children and women (and all marginalized social groups) particularly vulnerable to assault.

Therefore, all resources and activities created, developed, adapted, and disseminated by COPA National strive to reduce the vulnerability of children (and women, and members of all marginalized social groups) to assault. We do this in the following ways:

1) We facilitate people’s empowerment with TOOLS NOT RULES, sharing problem-solving tools and strategies that build their capacity to prevent violence and take care of themselves and others. We always frame it as tools not rules – in other words, as choices and not imposed. Trauma comes from loss of power and choice, so we aim to provide those who experienced trauma with opportunities to take back their power and build their confidence by making choices and taking action.

2) We aim to break the silence and secrecy surrounding violence against children, women, and other marginalized groups by providing accurate information and resources, addressing stereotypes and myths/false information around all forms of violence and its root causes, such as sexism, racism, etc.

3) We encourage children to seek and develop peer and adult support, and we educate adults on how they can provide empowering and respectful support to children. Problem-Solving Together is an excellent example of a tool that builds this capacity. It is a practical guide to supporting children who are struggling with a problem and also to helping them develop the ongoing ability to solve problems. This approach can be used with adults as well as children, modifying it as needed.

We suggest that adults who support safe, strong, and free children model positive action, respect the rights of children while seeking opportunities to share power with them, and recognize the capacity of a person to change. In our blogs, you will find many tools to support this approach. Here are 3 blogs about bullying that explain how to do this, step-by-step.

Intervene with the child who is being bullied

Intervene with the child who witnesses bullying

Intervene with the child who is bullying

The importance of community

The Child Assault Prevention curriculum (CAP) was originally developed in response to the need of a community to know how to prevent the tragedy of child sexual assault. Thus, the whole idea of CAP is community-based. We believe that trauma-informed work needs to consider a more holistic approach through community mobilization and capacity-building. We know it can be a powerful force for positive change when we create spaces in our communities and schools where marginalized people are seen and heard and have a voice – and where they can explore together how to take care of themselves and others.

Our belief is that anyone can learn our approach, and we pick and choose our own facilitators from the community, based on their perspectives and their communication skills, and not only their professional standing. We provide them with training in respectful and empowering approaches to facilitating discussions, and to supporting and listening to children and adults. We do not set ourselves up as the experts, rather we recognize the wisdom of children, trauma survivors, and community members.

One of the ways in which COPA National is unique is that we offer programming to kids, their parents and caregivers, and to educators – the whole circle of care surrounding a child. When everyone is equipped with tools and strategies, kids reap the benefits, as the adults in their lives are collaborating to enhance their well-being. When everyone shares a collective understanding, it is more likely that each child will be safe, strong, and free.

Another innovative aspect of how we approach trauma-informed programming, is through whole school interventions such as Change Our World and Our Power in Adversity. These programs align not only with trauma-informed principles of consultation, collaboration, and capacity building, but also with the current understanding of successful approaches to change management (Peter Block, 2011 & Edgar Schein, 1999). This systemic approach to individual and collective transformation through empowerment can have a profoundly healing and transformative effect when embedded in a system like a school or a community.

COPA National has been operating according to trauma-informed principles for almost 30 years now – since our inception. What has impelled us more than anything over the years is our wholehearted commitment to the PREVENTION of violence and child abuse. Our trauma-informed approach, and the underlying theory of who is vulnerable and why, is what makes our prevention programming effective. Recognizing the social roots of all forms of violence including child abuse, we seek to bring about the social change needed to ensure that all children, from whatever social group, are safe, strong and free. By eliciting the wisdom and participation of survivors, we have been able to develop programming, interventions, and resources that are powerful, engaging, and that really work.

[brucewaynehater101]

The batfamily, after finding out another really important secret, are under the impression that Tim doesn't trust them. Why else would he wait for the last possible minute to inform them of his personal information?

Bruce sets up more team bonding (family time) to try to mitigate this.

Dick drops by Tim's office more with lunch to hang out.

Jason uttered out a really awkward but heartfelt apology about some past wrongdoings.

Steph hauls Tim over her shoulder and then plops him down into outings such as the movies or zoo.

Damian told Tim that his photos are so bad he might as well just give Damian copies of them.

Duke, trying to get to know Tim better, challenges him to see who can solve puzzles faster. He also brings fun inventions to Tim's workshop for them to do together.

Barbara sets up monthly code nights with Tim. She also occasionally passes along fun missions he could do with his siblings.

While all of this is nice, Cass and Alfred know the truth. Tim just finds it funny to watch his family blink rapidly and then go through five stages of grief whenever they unlock more background lore.

[positivelyadhd]

here is your reminder that all trauma is valid.

trauma is to do with how our brains process (or don't process) memories and experiences and that if something is traumatic for you then that is trauma.

it doesn't matter if you or someone else thinks it should be significant or not or if someone else went through the same thing and wasn't impacted by it. what matters is if it's significant to you and how it impacted you.

a huge part of recovering from trauma is allowing yourself to accept that you had it in the first place.

[subsystems]

About dissociation in childhood, from Treating Adult Survivors of Childhood Emotional Abuse and Neglect (pp. 148-150)

[sophsun1]

#same energy aka the aftermath of dealing with evan 'chaotic bi' buckley #what makes this even funnier is that he's talking about each of them to other

[deservedgrace]

something that's really been bothering me lately is how the church i was a part of would like... repackage doctrine to make it sound nicer and more acceptable. like, the belief that all humans are evil by nature and deserve eternal torture for the crime of existing is inherently violent and cruel. but my church didn't frame it like that. they framed it as "yes we're ALL evil and wicked and we ALL deserve hell to atone for our sin (being human) BUT god loves you despite you not deserving love or happiness or anything good at all and all you have to do to avoid the pits of hell is accept jesus as your savior isn't that so amazing????" and they framed the crucifixion as this beautiful, selfless act of god by taking our place on the cross instead of "this all-powerful being who created all the rules decided that he required torture, death, and human sacrifice to be able to tolerate us". and it's not "women will be viewed as lesser than men" it's "women must submit to their husbands the same way we all must submit to god it's not dehumanizing it's holy and yes women have different roles but that doesn't make them lesser than and sure we don't have any women in leadership positions in the church and we would never even consider it, come on now that's ridiculous, but that's just because men are supposed to lead because men and women are different and created for different purposes it's just biology". and there are plenty others! i know that the reframing of everything is part of how they can even get people to accept the doctrine in the first place, but being on the outside of it is kind of horrifying. when you get down to the actual beliefs that are held without the distortions and manipulation, so many are violent, cruel, dehumanizing, abusive. but they distort and manipulate these beliefs to make them seem acceptable, morally correct, and redefine what love is and should look like.

[brimay]

Sometimes I feel normal and then I remember that Peeta is canonically the only person Katniss found truly attractive. And she married him.

[whump-is-love-whump-is-life]

That’s a nice fight or flight response you got there. Sure would be a shame if it turned to fawn against your will

[puppetmaster13u]

Prompt 273

You know what? We need more Good parents Fentons. 

And you know what else? Technically, Jack helped Danny defeat Pariah via the use of the Ecto-Skeleton. And like, that’s his son, his baby boy. Sure Danny is and has always been a mommy’s boy, but it doesn’t change that fact. They’re both already feeling horrible about the fact they could have hurt him, they could have hurt their son- they have hurt their son, killed him with their inaction and never again. 

So when these oversized jello-eyeballs try to insist that their baby, their precious baby boy, take a crown? Become a king when he’s not even out of highschool, when he doesn’t want it? No. Hell no! That is his Danny-o, his baby boy who was terrified of his own parents! 

Which is how Jack, despite technically still being alive even if so-very ecto-contaminated, became the Ghost King. 

And for some reason there’s several ghosts rather happy about this- oh, these are his Danny-O’s ghost-parents? Not-ghost parents seeing as some of them have never been anything but a realm denizen? That’s really fascinating- y’know what, want some fudge and we can exchange childcare- Maddie dear come over and meet our co-parents apparently!  

Now it’s not all easy, but they’re trying their best, and that’s all that can be asked. 

…

Which is perhaps why it’s so exasperating- or as Maddie would put it, downright infuriating- that it is now, almost an entire year and a half later that the Heroes finally arrive to investigate. Well, at least he has plenty of fudge since it’s almost time for the council meeting. 

[thepeacefulgarden]

[bethanythebogwitch]

Wet Beast Wednesday: parrotfish

Which fish hangs out on a mermaid pirate's shoulder and repeats what she says in a high-pitched voice? The parrotfish, of course. Or at least in fiction they should (certainly will in my D&D world). But even in real life, parrotfish are still pretty interesting.

(Image: a common parrotfish (Scarus psittacus) seen from the side in front of rocks and corals. It is a brightly-colored fish, mainly light blue but with patches and stripes of yellow and pink on the fins. Its mouth is open, revealing what appears to be a beak. End ID)

Parrotfish are fish famous for their mouths and eating habits. There are about 90 species known. While they were historically considered their own taxonomic family, they have since been reclassified a subset of the wrasse family and there is still some debate on how to classify them. Most species are on the smaller size, but a few can get very large. The largest species is the green humphead parrotfish (Bolbometopon muricatum) at 1.5 meters (4.9 ft) and 75 kg (165 lbs) while the smallest species is the bluelip parrotfish (Cryptotomus roseus) reaching 13 cm (5 in). I could not find an average weight for the bluelips. What makes parrotfish really stand out visually is their colors and their mouths. Most species are very brightly colored, with distinct markings and males are usually more brightly colored than females. Their mouths are dominated by what appear to be beaks, which gave them their common name. These beaks are actually made of approximately 1,000 teeth arranged in 15 rows. As the teeth wear out, they drop off and are replaced by the row behind them. The teeth are made of fluorapatite, the second hardest biomineral int the world. To support their hardness, the fluorapatite crystals that make up the teeth are woven together in a structure very similar to chainmail, resulting in very hard teeth that measure in at a 5 on the Mohs scale of hardness. For reference, iron is a 4 and higher numbers are harder. The teeth can also handle 530 tons of pressure. You could put the weight of 200 black rhinos on a tooth and it would be fine. The beaks are powerful enough to bite through rock. Which is what they use it for, but more on that below. Another unusual feature of parrotfish is how they sleep. Some species make their own sleeping bags, which would be adorable if they weren't made of mucus. The mucus is produced using glands in the gills and looks like a transparent bubble. The fish sleeps in the mucus cocoon and when it wakes up, it eats the cocoon. There have been several proposed benefits of the cocoon. It contains chemicals that harm skin parasites while also providing a barrier that keeps new parasites from reaching the fish. It also likely blocks the fish's scent, helping it hide from predators.

(Image: a green humphead parrotfish (Bolbometopon muricatum) swimming over yellow coral. It is large and mostly a uniform green color, except for the front of its head, which is pink. It has a large, fleshy lump on the top of its head. End ID)

(Image: a close-up of a parrotfish's beak. The top and bottom beaks are divided into two halves, left and right. The beak is bade of small, circular teeth that overlap each other. End ID)

(Image: another common parrotfish seen from the front. It is inside of a mucus cocoon, which appears as a transparent bubble around the fish. Bits of sand dot the cocoon's surface. End ID)

Parrotfish live worldwide, though the majority of species are found in the Indo-Pacific. They live in warm, shallow waters with lots of rocky reefs, especially coral reefs. They use those powerful teeth to eat and what they eat most is algae. There are three main types of feeding behavior: excavating, scraping, and browsing. Excavators bite into rocks to get their food, scrapers crape food off of the surface of the rocks, and browsers go after larger food sources like seagrass and sponges. Some of the larger parrotfish species also make coral a large part of their diet. When they eat, they naturally get rock in their mouths, moreso in excavators. Because their food clings to the rock, spitting the rocks out would deny them food. Instead, parrotfish use pharyngeal teeth set in their throats to grind the rock into sand, which then passes through the digestive tract. When it exists the digestive tract, it is in the form of fine grains of rock. Or to put it another way, parrotfish eat rock and poop sand. A single parrotfish can produce up to 40 kg (88lbs) of sand yearly, and bigger species can produce even more than that. The process of rock being broken down by living things is called bioerosion and parrotfish are one of the most famous sources of bioerosion. The sand they produce can serve as the basis for new growth of coral or other species and helps reinforce nearby islands. In places like Hawai'i, the Caribbean, and the Maldives, it's estimated that up to 80% of the famous white sand is produced by parrotfish and they serve as a major source of incoming earth to support the islands. This makes parrotfish ecosystem engineers. Their eating of algae is also majorly important to their ecosystems. Algae can overgrow and smother delicate ecosystems like coral reefs and seagrass beds and decaying algae draws oxygen out of the water. Parrotfish help the health of their environments by keeping the algae population at healthy levels. Parrotfish also eat seaweeds and sponges that grow much faster than coral and can smother coral reefs. Parrotfish are considered keystone species in many reefs, including the great barrier reef and their population dropping correlates with reduced health of reefs. Damaged reefs tent to have larger parrotfish populations and those populations drop as the reef recovers.

(Image: a group of many parrotfish feeding on coral. They are all the same species and are mostly blue, with yellow heads and stripes on the face. They appear to be biting the the coral. End ID)

Parrotfish are protogynous sequential hermaprodites. This means that all parrotfish are born female and can become male later in life. The transition is usually triggered when there are too many females or not enough males in a location, though in some species any fish that reaches a certain size will become male. Some parrotfish are solitary while others are social. In social species, the social groups consist of a large male and a harem of females that he protects and claims mating rights with. Other males will attempt to fight the male for dominance via headbutting and threat displays and occasionally one of his harem members will become male to challenge him. Males are usually more colorful than females, which they use to woo females, but also puts them at greater risk of predation. If the harem leader dies and is not replaces, one member of the harem will transition to male and replace him. Many species perform courtship dances during nights of the full moon. In non-social species, males will perform displays and fight with each other to attract females. In social species, the dominant male will mate with his harem while smaller males without harems will try to sneakily woo claimed females or sneak in and mate without being noticed. Parrotfish are broadcast spawners. The female releases her eggs into the water and the males releases sperm to fertilize them. The eggs will drift on the current until settling, after which the larvae will hatch. As with most fish species, only a very few of the larvae will reach adulthood.

(Image: a Mediterranean parrotfish (Sparisoma cretense). It is mostly bright red, but with a yellow patch above the tail and a yellow stripe around the eye that runs down to the belly. A large patch behind the eye is blue. End ID)

Thankfully, most parrotfish species are not particularly endangered. The largest threat to them comes from habitat loss as pollution and climate change harms coral reefs. Reintroducing parrotfish to damaged reefs helps them recover. All species are edible, though there is no commercial fishery for them. While parrotfish are capable of delivering powerful bites, there are few reports of humans getting bit. That being said, I found one case where someone had skin on his penis bitten off by a parrotfish. And yes, that link has pictures. Enjoy.

(Image: a blue parrotfish (Scarus coeruleus) looking at the camera. It is a blue fish with darker patches around the eye. Its snout is bulbous and the beak points downward. End ID).

[invisiblerambler]

Low key if you don't have empathy for Carmy I don't fucking trust you because how can you hate someone so deeply sad and broken?

He is not abusive he's hurting and it doesn't make how he treats any of them better but it isn't coming from the same place of malice everyone wants to portray it as.

[subsystems]

There's been a lot of harmful invalidation and misinformation floating around trauma spaces lately about the cause of complex dissociative disorders like DID. Please, let's put to rest the trauma olympics and claiming that certain childhood traumas are more "valid" than others. The childhood trauma that causes someone's DID does not need to be sexual or physical abuse, or even abuse at all.

From Understanding and Treating Dissociative Identity Disorder: A Relational Approach, by Elizabeth Howell (pages xvii - xviii):

"DID is usually the outcome of chronic and severe childhood trauma, which can include physical and sexual abuse, extreme and recurrent terror, repeated medical trauma, and extreme neglect. Pathological dissociation generally results from being psychically overwhelmed by trauma. . . . However, the traumatic experiences that may result in dissociative disorders do not always stem from sexual, physical, or emotional abuse. Disorganized attachment which often underlies the dissociative structure of dissociative disorders . . . may result from overwhelming experiences in the infant's interpersonal environment that are not caused by parental maltreatment. Parental illness, depression, or problematic attachment styles may be psychically overwhelming and lead to disorganized attachment. In addition, medical trauma may be dissociogenic. For example, some dissociative patients have reported histories of chronic medical problems and hospitalizations that involved severe pain and unavoidable separations from well-meaning parents. Medical trauma may involve both the chronic and severe pain of certain diseases and conditions as well as painful procedures intended to remediate these medical conditions. Some dissociative adult patients have reported the trauma of being left alone to suffer their pain as children in the hospital. Such children may be additionally confused by the fact that their parents are either hurting them, as part of necessary medical interventions or allowing others to hurt them . . ."

You can find a free download of this book and others [here]. I highly recommend reading it, it's one of my favorite books on DID. If you're able to, please consider purchasing a copy of it to support the author too!

Anyways, if you're reading this and you've been harmed by the recent influx of trauma invalidation, please know that I'm here for you. I believe you. Your trauma is REAL and it was ENOUGH to cause your disorder. You were a child and no child deserves to go through trauma. No one.

[mutable-manifestation]

Actual Scientists Jack & Maddie AU Part 3

Part 1 & 2

***

The lab is empty when they get to Fenton Works, his parents busy off helping the JLD wherever it was they were working from.

The journey the rest of the way to the Far Frozen passes relatively quickly under the weight of discussing how to reverse engineer the sarcophagus of forever sleep to make Naptime Box 2: Vlad Edition.

Could they probably just beat him up with the right plan and aid? Sure. But then they risk having to play royal hot potato (Danny doesn't want it and he doubts most of the allies he has would want the extra responsibility. Assuming there are responsibilities - Danny wouldn't know since there hasn't been a king, for all intents and purposes, since well before he became a halfa so who knows what the position even means in the context of the Zone).

Plus it would be way more satisfying to shove him in a box. Vlad gets a nice long nap and Danny gets to live the rest of his half-life without worrying about his Dad getting stabbed or something if Vlad starts feeling impatient.

It would also give Danny plenty of time to find some way to buy the Packers - not because he wants them, just because it would be really funny if Vlad eventually woke up to find that the only thing he wanted other than Maddie was now also very permanently out of reach.

The city of Green Bay could fold eventually, after all. But Danny? Danny would never yield, just to spite him, and Vlad would know that.

He probably won't actually do it, seeing as a) expensive and b) probably complicated.

But it would be really funny.

Their discussion on the ethics of using the Fenton Stockades as the base for the Box cut off as they land.

Without the distraction of their chat the adrenaline of panic comes rushing back, and he transforms as he steps out of the Speeder, nyooming to hover in front of Frostbite so quickly that the entire welcoming party - Frostbite somehow manages to have one arranged every time he drops by, and Danny is usually willing to at least try and indulge them since it seems to make them happy - jolts in surprise.

"Greetings!" Frostbite smiles wide, arms open in a grand welcoming, the only hint of lingering surprise the trails of slightly puffed up fur up his arms and the sides of his neck that has already mostly smoothed itself back out. "The Far Frozen welcomes the Great One and friends-"

"Hey Frostbite sorry for being abrupt but I'm kind of freaking out and you seemed like the best person - uh, ghost to go to because you always seem to know lots of things and I kind of need to know what's going on as soon as possible just in case it's a worst case scenario because the Justice League came to talk to my parents about some papers and I probably haven't mentioned them to you before because they're awful and I thought my parents made them but surprise I was wrong! Which is good! Except the League was mostly worried about them maybe causing the new ghost king to war with the human realm because apparently there's a supernatural branch of the Justice League and they think there's a new Ghost KingTM as in the Ghost King after Pariah Dark and I'm kind of freaking out because if there is a new ghost king there's actually a chance it's Vlad and oh ancients please tell me it's not Vlad or that the League heard wrong please."

Sam and Tucker had caught up by then, coming to stand on either side of him as Frostbite blinked.

"You are...asking me the identity of the current High King?" He asks, face scrunched in a bewildered expression.

"Oh my gosh Batman was right!?" He floats a bit higher at the news. "Please just tell me it's not Vlad! Uh, Plasmius."

"Plasmius?" Frostbite asks, eyebrows crawling higher. "Certainly not! What in the realms - do you truly not know?"

"Oh thank goodness," Danny sighs, sinking back to his usual level. "Not Vlad, okay, one less disastrous possibility. And whoever it is probably already knows they're the king and nothing bad has happened yet so it's probably fine, right?"

He looks back to meet Frostbite's eyes.

"Wait, nothing bad has happened yet, right? Like, is everything okay? I know Pariah caused you guys a lot of grief before; the new guy 's not going around causing trouble for you and you just haven't told me because you're worried about being a bother, right?" He frets, eyes flicking about, searching for fresh injuries on the various members of the welcoming party.

"...No, Great One," Frostbite answers, blinking away the surprised expression to be replaced by something soft. "Though I, and all the Far Frozen, are honored by your concern. While Pariah Dark is no longer the High King of the Infinite Realms, I can assure you, with utmost certainty, that you have nothing to fear from his successor. But I believe we have much more to discuss. Come, let us find somewhere more comfortable to talk - and get your human friends out of the cold."

***

It didn't take them long to reach a sitting room, and soon enough they were all settled into the enormous, fuzzy chairs in one of the warmer rooms available, Danny and Frostbite each with a cup of shaved ice tea while Sam and Tucker were offered beverages warm enough to steam in deference to their need for warmth.

Once everyone had taken a sip - or bite - Danny launched back into his questioning.

"So did Dark have a kid hidden away somewhere or did some kind of council finally decide on his replacement? Actually can ghosts even have - wait right Box Lunch, forgot about that on purpose but never mind. Or is there some fourth option that isn't those or trial by combat that we didn't think of?"

"Before I answer that, Great One, may I ask why you have already discounted trial by combat?" He returns curiously.

"Because if it was trial by combat it would be Vlad - er, Plasmius - and you already said it isn't him."

"Or it could be you," Tucker ribs, waggling his fingers at him.

"We already talked about why it couldn't be me, Tuck," Danny huffs, rolling his eyes and taking another bite of his... smoothie?

"Oh? And why do you think it would be Plasmius?" Frostbite asks.

"Because! I may have fought Pariah Dark, and sure I put him back in the sarcophagus, but I was running on fumes by that point, and he was still slamming around in there! Vlad, as much as I hate to admit it, is the one that turned the key and made sure he stayed locked away. It took almost everything I had to keep him pinned long enough. If...if he'd been even a few seconds later I probably would've died the rest of the way before he even had the time to break out a second time."

"But had you not put him there, no key would have mattered," Frostbite begins quietly. "Plasmius was no match for Pariah Dark; he was defeated in an instant the first time they clashed."

"Well, yeah, but so was I," he protests, not liking the direction the conversation is beginning to take.

"And yet, you alone went to face him a second time. You alone stood against the King of All Ghosts while your armies clashed."

"Our-!? I didn't have- you mean the ghosts that came to help me???" Danny sputtered, incredulous. "They weren't an army they were just-"

He pauses, searching for words that would not come.

"They were just a large group of ghosts who sided with you, who aided you in combat and kept the multitudes distracted while you went to face their leader alone. However you thought of them at the time, whatever they were to you up till then or are to you now, after, in that moment they were your army."

"Danny's totally the ghost king, isn't he?" Sam drawls after the brief silence that follows.

"Indeed," Frostbite answers her, but he looks Danny in the eyes as he does so. "You are the savior of the Ghost Zone, Pariah's Bane. And you are the High King of the Infinite Realms."

"I cheated!" Danny blurts out, shooting up to float above his chair.

"Cheated?" Frostbite's lips twitch as he fights down a smile.

"I had the Fenton Ecto-Skeleton! That's totally cheating! Don't combat trials have to be honorable or something?!" He begs.

Frostbite chuckles.

"I apologize, Great One, but I am afraid there is no such thing as an honorable war," he says, expression briefly turning solemn. "And even if it were, just as you had your "Ecto-Skeleton," did not Pariah have his ring and crown?

You issued a challenge and he answered, your armies clashed while the two of you stood against each other and each other alone; you alone put him back into the Sarcophagus of Forever Sleep, and you alone held it shut long enough for Plasmius to turn the key.”

Danny drifts back down to his seat as Frostbite speaks, then continues slouching further with every word.

“I am given to understand that Plasmius likes to think of others as pawns on his own personal chessboard,” he says, “But at the time he was but another ghost, come to fight Pariah's army on your behalf - as a member of your army. A pawn, to paraphrase his own words, that you used to topple a king - not through any intentional manipulation, but through the sheer magnetic charisma of your willingness to stand against monsters like Pariah Dark and of your ability to do so. The confidence to stand alongside you that such strength inspires. 

He would not have approached if he did not believe you could win - would not risk endangering himself so. At best, you could consider him a referee, calling the match to a close once it was decisively in your favor.

Plasmius may think of existence as a game with himself as the only player, and he may have been acting in his own self-interest overall, but by every measure, in this instance, he was undeniably your piece.

The Zone itself acknowledges your right to rule by the way the crown of fire sits where you left it, unmoving on the floor of Pariah's keep until the day you finally choose to wear it, no matter how many hands may try to move it."

Frostbite's words are slow and measured, but as undeniable as the creeping of a glacier. And by the time they cease, Danny has sunk so far as to end up an undignified heap on the floor before his chair.

The trio remains silent as they absorb his words.

Minutes pass before Danny finally speaks.

"If the crown can't be taken, then how did I get it from Pariah?" He questions, a final hope that Frostbite may be mistaken.

"It will only remain unmoved until you first put it on. After that, it will be up to you whether it stays safe on your head."

Danny groans his despair, final bit of hope shattered.

"I must apologize again, Great One," he says solemnly. "Had I known you were unaware of your station, I would have informed you sooner."

He frowns heavily, looking into the distance thoughtfully.

"The Observants should have informed you long before now."

"Well, that explains it. The Observants hate Danny's guts," Tucker says.

"To neglect their duties for such a reason...," He trails off, his glower highlighting the inhuman nature of his visage. 

The trio fidget.

Danny coughs after a few seconds of tense silence.

“Uh, speaking of duties,” he begins, relaxing as Frostbite’s expression smooths back into something kind and polite as he listens, “What exactly does the Ghost King even do? Like. Pariah was locked away for… a long time? I guess. So does the Zone even need a King? Can’t I just, like, resign?”

“I suppose it might seem that way from a younger ghost’s perspective - Pariah has been locked away for millenia, after all, and the Zone is still in one piece.” 

Frostbite pauses, leaning back in his seat and taking another bite of his drink. 

“However. What you must understand, Great One, is that the problems caused by the absence of a king in the Infinite Realms are not the whirlwind that such a thing would be in the living realm - social order is affected, but the speed of bureaucracy is slower by orders of magnitude in the Realms, and there is not the same level of inter-reliance that the living tend to require - but rather, they are winds and waters sliding against a rock, chipping away at it bit by bit until it is either worn smooth… or the whole structure collapses under its own weight.”

“How does not having a king cause dimensional collapse!?” Tucker shrieks, clutching his cup like a lifeline.

“How long do we have before it collapses?” Sam asks urgently not a second later.

“Oh shit, how long do we have before it collapses???” he echoes, hunching over his cup enough that the steam adds a layer of fog to his glasses.

Danny sits bolt upright, whipping wide eyes away from his friends to join them in staring at Frostbite.

“Total collapse would take millenia more to truly begin,” he placates before taking a more grave expression. “This does not mean that there will not be issues before that point, however; the symptoms of the High King’s absence have begun to show this past millennium. But rest assured, there is time enough to heal the wounds that have been wrought. The only permanent damage would be the collapse itself, and that, as I said, is millenia away.”

“Is… is that why you never mentioned it to me before?” Danny asks, dropping back to the ground in relief. “Because it’s not urgent and you figured I’d just…get to it eventually? Actually, why did you think I knew if you knew that the crown was still in Pariah’s Keep?”

“It is the duty of the Observants to observe, but also, as you have experienced, to oversee - the timeline, trials, the general functioning of the zone. Without a king to report to, much of their ability to act is crippled, of course - their ability to interfere directly with the timeline has always been severely restricted, their options for sentencing are severely reduced, and there are some things the Realms require that only the High King can provide - but one duty remains unaffected: overseeing the ascension of new kings. 

Coronations have taken many forms in the past, from a quick swap in the battlefield to a formal ceremony to a celebration that lasted a decade. Given the dark era we are, at last, able to put behind us and the non-urgent nature of even the most severe problems that the Realms are currently affected by, I had assumed that the large delay was in preparation for that last form - the lead-up to a grand celebration.”

“Except instead it’s just them being petty,” Sam notes, sitting back up from her own relieved slouch. 

Danny groans, leaving his tea to float and covering his face with his hands.

“Why couldn’t it have just been as easy as shoving Vlad in a box,” he whines.

“I mean, we still can?” Tucker offers, prompting Sam to smack him over the head before pausing consideringly.

“OW!”

“He might be right, actually,” she says, ignoring his exclamation. “Given Vortex’s trial and sentencing, there’s clearly some kind of legal system in the Zone that isn’t just Walker on a power trip. No doubt he’s broken some kind of Actual Realms Law - I’d be surprised if breaking Pariah out like he did wasn’t some form of highly illegal - so you could probably send him to actual Ghost Jail. It’s certainly where he belongs, given all the….”

She makes a vague gesture with her hand in lieu of words.

“That doesn’t resolve the problem of I Don’t Wanna Be A King!” Danny exclaims, sitting back and throwing his hands in the air.

Then he turns to Frostbite, eyes pleading. 

“Can’t you be king?” he asks. 

Frostbite opens his mouth to reply, but Danny steamrolls over him.

“It makes sense! You already know how to lead people! And your people love you! You already know about all the king stuff too! You’ve beaten me in spars before! We’d just have to go to the keep, I put on the crown, you beat me, and problem solved!”

Frostbite’s smile is a mix of amused and pitying.

“I have only ever beaten you in training spars, Great One, and you and I both know that is largely because they were focused on improving your skill with ice and ice alone. Even if I could defeat you in a true all-out fight as you are, I believe you underestimate the boost granted by the crown of fire.”

“I can just put it on then take it off again before we fight! And we can stick to ice!”

“I’m afraid it is not so simple,” he shakes his head. “If you do not give it your all, the crown - the Realms - will not recognize the transition. The only way to “throw the match” successfully would require your opponent to fully End you: to crush your core and snuff your spirit from the very fabric of existence. I am unwilling to do such a thing, and I sincerely hope you would not ask it of me - or, indeed, of anyone.”

Danny paled enough that he nearly matched his human form in skin tone.

“Right. Let’s… let’s not do that, actually.”

“On the bright side, you can probably weasel ruling tips out of Aquaman in exchange for not declaring war on the Living Realm!” Tucker chirps, aiming to cheer him up.

“I’m not going to threaten the Justice League!” he yelps, scandalized.

“But you probably won’t have to threaten them,” Sam chimes in. “They’re already trying to summon you, you already know their goal is to avoid a war. As long as you don’t ask for anything unreasonable, they should be inclined to give you what you want in exchange for peace.”

“Once you offer peace, they will be invested in your successful rule of their own volition as a means of perpetuating said peace,” Frostbite corrects. “If you would like to set preconditions to an accord you should make them things that will not readily be given as a result of said accord. But before we discuss further, perhaps you can fill me in on why war was a concern in the first place? I believe you mentioned something about papers?”