#who was that man vaping in the train

[incorrect-hs-quotes]

DAVE: im not against vaping but man vaping two inches from my face on the subway is a ridiculous asshole kind of move

DAVE: this dude was billowing like he was auditioning for the role of haunted house fog machine

DAVE: the humidity in the whole car changed

DAVE: he was ruining haircuts

DAVE: just jump starting the water cycle

DAVE: condensation was dripping down my glasses

DAVE: people were slipping off poles

DAVE: it was chaos

DAVE: it was like watching one man try to terraform the moon

DAVE: a planet with one dense root beer scented atmosphere blocking out the sun and choking all life

[ventismacchiato]

stuck with you — windblume !

˗ˏˋ profiles ´ˎ˗

yn — main vocalist which makes you the most popular member. you go viral every other week for getting into petty arguments on twitter and weverse with scaramouche. should definitely learn media training because you tend to rant about him too much during lives. ‘compilations of scaramouche and yn bickering’ are super common. you’re also the only member to release a solo album which gets you guys a lot of new fans. became an idol after being a trainee for way too many years, which is why you’re salty about scara debuting so quickly when he became an idol trainee after you. [🍰]

xiao — main dancer. choreographs a lot of the dances if not all. very introverted in public but talkative in behind the scenes vlogs with his group. xiao stans have it hard because this man hardly posts anything. fans call him the dad of the group because he’s always sneaking food onto everyone’s plates and keeping them hydrated during practice. when you guys first debuted everyone thought he was mean and cold when really he’s just a quiet sweetheart. has a tattoo sleeve that the fans haven’t seen the entirety of yet, jungkook vibes in that sense. most expensive photocards after you, the one of him in cat ears and winking goes for hundreds. [🐈‍⬛]

lumine — leader of the group and one of the only responsible ones. strict about keeping everyone on schedule and trying to appear presentable at music and award shows. tries to drag you all to the gym at five in the morning but to no avail. she vlogs her gym routine and whatever member she dragged that morning is usually seen in the back sitting on a yoga ball the entire time, talking as she runs miles on the treadmill. always setting trends for workout routines and makeup looks. once it touches her face it sells out. her twin is also an idol so they both do a lot of tiktoks and videos together. it siblings. [☀️]

fischl — one of the lyricists for the group. so chronically online. she’s always active at odd hours of the night and interacting with her fans. posts the most too, so fischl biases are always full with content. wears an eyepatch as part of her idol persona, and still manages to perform with it on. will do book club livestreams where she’ll talk about her current favorite book with her fans for two hours or more. lumine has to shut the live off everytime because she will just keep yapping. [🦉]

venti — writes most of the group's songs and runs production. most unserious member and should really attend a public image class because he does not know how to be a celebrity. fans are constantly finding vapes in the back of his photos and videos of him drunk at award shows. went viral once for showing up to a music show high off his mind but still managing to perform. will dye the ends of his hair different colors every comeback from his fan’s requests. loves to go live and sing covers for whatever people ask for. he does qnas and takes the tmis too seriously. [🌱]

yoimiya — visual and vocalist, will bring out her guitar during concerts a lot. the only member who will go to the gym with lumine. became an idol because she used to busk in her hometown and got picked up by your manager while she was on vacation. would be the type of idol to adore fancalls and do decorating photocards on livestreams. gets invited to a lot of variety shows and was probably a judge for a survival show at one point. [🧨]

windblume —one of the idol groups underneath sakura entertainment,  a six member mix gendered idol group known for their whimsical and indie comebacks every year. think of txt’s brand when it comes to your guys’ style of music. have been a group for about three years. members range from 21-22. their debut album Temptation got them to their popularity today. fandom name: bloomies

stuck with you !

masterlist — next

for my nonkpop fans the emojis are their assigned ones for when people post their livestream quotes, will make more sense later 😓 and weverse is basically twitter but just for idols to interact with fans

tried not to describe yn too much because i want it to be inclusive, any photos showing yn are just to depict the pose! not gender, race, or body type 🙏

spent way too long making custom instagram templates and for what help so pls look at them xx it’s so u can visualize what these 2d mfs wud look like in this au

pls lmk in the masterlist comments if i can use ur username and make you a fan in the au!

synopsis — after the disaster that was the live award show, where you and scaramouche got into an argument on stage after both of your groups got a tie for top artists, your guys' PR teams have been in shambles trying to scrape up your mess. that's when the idea to send you both off with some other idols to a remote location for a survival dating show to mend your public image comes up. before you know it your bags are packed and you’re on a plane to a remote island. the only obligation is you need to end up with scaramouche at the end of the show, whether you end up liking him or not doesn’t matter to your managers as long as the show’s ratings stay high. whatever you do in between to get there is up to you!

notes — it’s my exam week so all i have to give you is profiles for now </3

taglist open for a while longer, please comment on the masterlist to be added!

taglist — @na1lea @cindywasneverhere @lunavixia @sheraeera @aestherin @mlaakai @camvrin @retiredmommylover @kitsuvil @iheartpieck @crystalcrys @cartierfiles @loveariel @silly-ez @mochipls @pomeiu @chuuismylife @flowerypesky @creammpuff @justanothertiredreader @boxdisappeared @kissmiere @crucnhice @kissingkzuha @webbywill @kazusboyfriend @s3xpistolss @pjsucks @bunns-wonderland @lordbugs @localgirlywithnolife @kosumos @danfelions @scarasmood @featuredtofu @pinxeajin @herebyaccident0 @scaradooche @pglt19 @chemiru @childesbabygirl @simonisferal @shutingstar @vxcmx @domimiki @ttalgi @esuz @tokkishouse @lilachasawesomehair @xxrexx

[simjaeyvn]

best friend's brother

pairing: jake x reader

summary: who knew your bond with your best friend's brother was a lot closer than you thought.

warnings: pussy eating, vaping, mentions of smoking, idk

inhale and exhale, it was easy. you pull the vape from your now parted lips handing it over to the man sitting beside you on your bed. you don't miss the way his eyes are trained on your lips as he takes the device from you. who would've thought you would be here with a man, alone in your room, vaping together. who would've guessed it'd be jake sim, your best friend's older brother. the two of you had known each other's existence of course, thanks to your amazing best friend but you'd only bonded over your likings of smoking and vaping. the reasoning was funny but you couldn't deny how fun spending time with him was.

every week he'd come over, one expecting the other to have a vape, i mean, that's the only reason you were friends, right? you noticed you enjoyed his presence far too much for your own liking but who were you to deny the butterflies that attacked your stomach every time you'd open the door to be met with his smile. a very cute smile.

you look over at him, vapour leaving his lips, his plump and kissable looking lips. you turn your head back to the front, where were these thoughts coming from? i mean, of course you wanted to fuck him but losing your best friend would mean losing your literal other half. you shuffle around waiting for him to pass it back to you. when he does, your hands touch and there's a bubbling feeling in your stomach. you look at his hands, admiring how beautiful they were but your thoughts get nastier as you imagine them inside of you. bringing the vape towards your lips, you inhale it and proceed to exhale. everything is fine, right? no. you felt hot and your panties felt wet. why did he have to be so attractive? you let out a sigh as you pass it back to jake.

"y/n?" he said, you really loved the way he said your name. "hm?" you mumble, trying your best to ignore the fact you can feel yourself physically getting wetter. "y'know, you're really hot." your head snaps to face him. with your lips parted and eyes widened, you stare at him as if he'd confessed to committing a crime. "what?" you say in a whisper, it wasn't intentional but it was the best thing that came out. "i really want you," he confesses, "it's okay if you don't see me that way but i just wanted to let it out." not knowing how to reply, you grab his hand and bring it down towards your covered thighs. pausing as you pull up your skirt and then you continue to bring his hand down to your now drenched panties. he gasps but the shocked expression on his face is now replaced by a smirk. you wanted him so bad. his fingers ghost over your clothed pussy, rubbing it in the gentlest way possible. you bite down on your bottom lip as you feel his hand go into your panties. "you're so wet angel." he frowns, as if he were upset that you didn't initiate anything earlier. “want you too jakey.” you whined, as he applied pressure onto your clit. 

“really?” he asks, hovering above of you, hand still stuffed in your panties. “for how long, pretty?” jake sim and his stupid pet names, the stupid pet names that are making you go crazy.

“so long jakey, please eat me out.” you said in a breathy whine causing him to let out a low groan. how did someone get hotter each passing second? 

“how could i say no to you pretty?” he leans down to kiss your lips for a slight second. you open your mouth to speak but when the cold air touches your now bare pussy as jake pulls down your panties, every thought is lost. he moves so his head is now right in front of your pussy and you can feel his hot breath on it. “what a pretty pussy.” he says and you can feel the vibrations of every word due to the unbelievable distance between his face and your core. 

“jakey, please.” you choke out and he gives your clit a small kiss before you feel his tongue now on where you need him most. a small whimper escapes your lips and you grab onto his hair. he stuck his tongue in you as deep as he could and the noises that left you had you shocked. his arms lock your thighs in place so you wouldn’t close your legs. it felt like he was making out with your pussy. he starts softly sucking your clit and your eyes rolled back to what felt like another dimension. if jake sim was anything, he was the best pussy eater. leaving your clit he starts sticking his tongue into you again. the amount of pleasure you were feeling was almost criminal. you couldn’t even speak, incoherent words spilling from your lips. 

jake was so addicted to your cunt, moaning against it as he ate you out like a starved man. he didn’t even notice the way he started rutting against your mattress to calm his aching boner. 

“jakey,” you moaned, “i’m cumming.”

“cum on my tongue baby,” he mumbles, lips still attached to your pussy. you close your eyes, waiting for your high but he slaps your thigh causing you to squeal. “eyes open baby, let me see you all fucked out because of me.” you let out the neediest whine and reopen your eyes. you look down and see jake, his tongue doing wonders to you and looking back at you with the hungriest eyes. 

“fuck,” you moan out as you finally reach your orgasm. you see your release on his lips and you whine once more as he licks his lips clean. he shuffles around so you’re now at eye level with each other. 

“best pussy ever baby.” he says before capturing your lips in the hottest make out session you’ve ever experienced. you both get lost into the kiss but everything is interrupted by an annoying ringtone. “fucking hell,” he grumbles, reaching out for his phone. 

“who is it?” you ask, pouting your lips. you were annoyed and frustrated, and horny. 

“my sister for fucks sake.” you feel your heart sink a little, your best friend. how could you forget? you watch him raise the phone to his ear and an idea pops into your head. he was now sitting so you lifted yourself up and straddled his lap. clueless to the plan playing in your head; he rests a hand on your waist.

“what the fuck do you-” you push your bare core against his clearly hard boner. “fuck, what do you want.” he sends you a glare but doesn’t bother pushing you off as you continue grinding against him. “i’m busy, i’ll come later.” he says, impatiently waiting for the other end to hang up. your grinding doesn’t stop and you bite onto your hand, the fear of getting caught still lingers in your mind as if you’re not fucking yourself onto jake. “fucks sake, i’ll come.” you frown. he hangs up and kisses the frown plastered on your lips. “i‘m sorry baby, my family’s being dickheads.”

“it’s okay,” you breathe out, removing yourself off of his lap.

“i’ll make it up to you, okay? next time i’ll punish you for what you just did.” you giggle and send him a nod as he grabs his jacket off of your floor. “cya baby.”

“see you jakey.” 

_

shoutout to my passionfruit mango lime vape for inspiring me!!!

[bunnypansy]

Twst as K-Pop Groups!

Rated E, for EVERYONE!

A short film exploring a Twisted Wonderland Idol AU!

Featuring: All the dorms + Che'nya and a Neige mention

Beware! This film contains: really bad kpop group names, smoking mention, otherwise I think it's fine

Heartslaybul

Group name: LVBZ (Luver Boyz), I wanted to lean into the heart theme for that classic boygroup feel

Fandom name: Rozes, for obvious reasons

While Riddle is the obvious answer for leader, Trey is the right answer. Responsible older brother Trey is probably deeply underappreciated in the group. I feel like he’s probably been in a group that disbanded early before, (cough, Che’nya, Trey, Riddle group anyone?) and has a bit of a tired vibe. He writes a good handful of the songs since he plays the guitar, but he’s actually not crazy about pop. They definitely share a dorm and Trey made a chore chart for them.

Riddle is definitely taking the position of vocalist and center, he’s probably really strict about his training and exercise, he was a trainee for a loooong time and after his last group he’s kinda nervous. His mom used to be a very popular vocalist, but you’ll never catch him with nepo baby claims because he’s so intense. Besides LVBZ Riddle also does some modeling on the side and will probably end up in a drama of some kind.

Cater is absolutely giving “has so many predebut photos” energy. From vlives, to vlogs, cooking videos, asmr videos, tiktoks, instagram posts, Cater is all over their social media like crazy. He’s got a pretty good public image, always interacting with fans, the only thing is- he's a chronic content farmer, it's like so bad guys. At least his aegyo is actually cute? He’s the face and probably a sub vocalist of some kind, but definitely writes the lot of their songs. Seems like the type who has a very good image but chainsmokes/vapes on the side.

RAPPER DEUCE. Okay normal again. But he totally fits the rapper vibes, I can’t stress how well it fits. Has the most embarrassing predebut photos known to man, lots of him with badly dyed hair and he probably had a bullying scandal really early into his career. Extremely awkward aegyo, fans love him cus he comes off as cute but very genuine, fan favorite.

At this point I’ve put all the basketball boys as dancers but can you blame me? Ace reeks of high energy dancer who kinda sucks ass at singing. He tries really, but just let him be the main dancer and a sub rapper! Ace and Deuce used to go to the same highschool predebut and did not get along. Don't leave this guy alone with fans, not because he's going to do anything criminal- he's just gonna say some dumb shit. Spill a secret, be generally kinda dickish- just. Don't do it, fanservice is not Ace’s strong suit

Their discography is kinda all over the place but I feel like that’s the Heartslaybul vibe? I tried to keep it light and sort of… classic boy group vibes. I'm not really into light concept boy groups so this was difficult for me. (I wrote this before I listened to zb1’s debut. They are zb1)

Debut song: Kitsch by IVE

Other tracks: In Bloom by Zb1; Very Nice by Seventeen; Attention by New Jeans; Sour Grapes by Lesserafim; Blue Flame by Lesserafim; Best Friend Ever by NCT Dream

Solo releases:  One and Only by Gowon of Loona (Riddle); Anti-romantic by TXT (Trey)

Savanaclaw

Group name: BxB (Boy X Beast), I swear I wasn’t trying to copy TXT that hard

Fandom name: BOB (Be Our Best), because fans “make them their best”. It’s so bad but this is intentional

Leona is the leader but honestly he doesn’t do much to corral anyone. He’s definitely been in a couple groups that have done very poorly and can’t stop getting compared to his more successful brother- a recently retired soloist. Worse, he gets tons of “he’s a lazy dancer” and “nepo baby” comments from fans. He’s a bit jaded, and for good reason. He’s not much of a dancer, moreso acting as the visual and vocalist in his group and chances are he’s done an acting gig or two. Leona does a lot of low energy vlives, it's like him eating fried chicken in the dark while barely talking on camera. Refuses to do any cutesy fanservice, ask him to look hot? Done and done. Aegyo? Ask Ruggie.

Ruggie is the face of the group, everyone on the planet has seen him busking before and during his trainee period, not to mention he’s funny, fans love him. He’s also carrying the rapper position, and often gets center, but he and Leona are honestly neck and neck in that area. Ruggie's pretty good aegyo but he literally always laughs afterwards. So many memes of the dumb faces he makes while laughing.

Jack iiiis the dancer, so many first years were subjected to dancer and rapper sorry guys. He’s tried to write songs but only a couple have really panned out- the others are encouraging though! Obviously maknae, endless jokes about being GIANT despite being the youngest. Somehow he seems to take this the most serious despite being the newest to this?

Their sound is very classically masculine, as is Savanaclaw’s vibe. If they barked in the song I legally had to add it

Debut song: Clap by Seventeen

Other Tracks: Superbowl by SKZ; Wonderland by ATEEZ; Wolfgang by SKZ (sorry it was too funny not to); (Grrr 총량의 법칙) BEWARE by SKZ; My Pace by SKZ; Boxer by SKZ; Bouncy by ATEEZ

Solo releases: None

Octavinelle

Group name: TYDE (“Take Your Dreams Everywhere”), I went the EXiD route with this one, it was a little too funny not to

Fandom name: Tied, because TYDE is tied to them 

Oh my god. Despite being my favorite dorm, Octavinelle gave me a fuckin hell of a time to put together, I just did not have a clear vision for them at all. I’m going with Azul, even though I considered leader Jade for a little bit, simply because I think Azul is the kind of leader who designs a bunch of merch for the fans- a la the VIXX thong. He’s rocking with the visual, center, and vocalist position. He comes off as a very smooth and self assured leader, but let’s be honest he’s the only one in the group who’s having a panic attack before award shows. I think he probably had a really hard time as a trainee and can’t let that go just yet.

Jade doesn’t get any kind of strong spot in the lineup somehow, despite there only being three members, he definitely ends up a bit in the background. But Jade doesn’t mind! He honestly doesn’t care much for the spotlight and is mostly here because Azul and Floyd are. He writes all the songs for their group, no arguments.

So we all know Floyd is the dancer, guy canonically loves dancing, but he’s also going to steal the rapper position. This is because rappers are always the weird ones in the group, and by god is Floyd the weird one. He always gets styled extremely strangely, I mean every time he steps on stage he ends up in a new “worst outfits in kpop” list. Floyd ends up being the face because he’s such a standout, not to mention the fact he keeps… showing up with other groups. Is there a vlive happening? Somehow Floyd interrupts. Another group practicing? Not without Floyd they’re not. He’s even managed to be in the background of several MVs (think OOH-AHH Chan). Floyd seems to just know everyone everywhere. 

Holy hell okay their music gave me a hard time too. Octavinelle is so solidified as jazz in my head that trying to think of anything else for them gave me an aneurysm.I struggled so much that yeah I’m breaking and adding one or two japanese songs, sorry guys

Debut Song: Mafia In The Morning by Itzy

Other Tracks: Dice by Nmixx; First by Everglow (tell me Azul wouldn’t tear up those vocals?? Get Floyd on the chorus? Screaming); Play with Fire by Camellia (covered by ツバサ【歌の部屋】 if you need to hear a human sing it); Black Suit by Super Junior 

Solo releases: ViViD by Heejin of Loona (Azul); Villain by Stella Jang (Azul)

Scarabia

Group name: Wysper (Honestly not happy with either of the names but I can’t think of anything better)

Fandom name: Wishes

Okay they’re complex because. Uh. Jamil is basically doing everything. He’s the most talented  dancer, rapper, vocalist; it’s just that Kalim is the face. Aaaand the center. Despite being a trainee for a way shorter amount of time, despite not being as skilled as Jamil, Kalim took first place in the competitive show they both participated in. Very bitter. Jamil tries to keep it on the down-low but their relationship is definitely suffering from favoritism.

Kalim has probably been a star for a very long time, I’m talking child star levels of fame and already had a fan base by the time he and Jamil debuted. He’s got amazing charisma and stage presence, not to mention Kalim is taking first place as the aegyo king. However, the nepo baby allegations are through the ROOF, seeing as his family straight up owns the company he and Jamil debuted under. That’s not to say he doesn’t try! He works hard, but it’s not going to save him, especially when he’s getting a billion offers from modeling companies and fashion brands, when Jamil isn’t.

I can’t describe what their sound is exactly? I feel like it’s somewhere close to reggaeton with a bit of bollywood/southeast asia

Debut song: You cannot tell me Paint The Town by Loona is not THE Wysper song. It’s literally so perfect I was angry I didn’t think of it earlier. Kalim on the light verses, Jamil on the chorus? Insane. 

Other tracks: Icky by Kard; Charmer by SKZ; Cake by Kard; Ring the Alarm by Kard; Tinnitus by TXT; SHOOT! by Itzy; Red Moon by Kard

Solo releases: Singing in the Rain by JinSoul of Loona (Kalim)

Pomefiore

Group name: FoE (Fruit of Evil), I wanted to lean into the lip/biting themes for them and pick something that felt suitably sexy

Fandom name: Bites

Vil has to be the leader obviously, but he’s also the face, visual and vocalist- let’s be real he’s the most favored of the group and everyone knows it. He was definitely an actor before this, he probably ended up in the group because of an elimination show that he won and then got the privilege of picking all his other members. He for sure has some solo releases, brand deals, modeling gigs- Vil is the it boy of their generation, the kind of idol everyone knows. Definitely a massive one-sided rivalry with Neige, because Neige was probably in a NCT Dream type group as a kid, then went solo when he got older and became incredibly successful. Vil is endlessly jealous.

Rook was probably a runner up in the same show as Vil and fully admitted to being a massive fan while on the show. He’s the best dancer in the group, probably the center, and writes the majority of the songs cus I know this weird fucker likes poetry. Rook is guy who’s a fan before he’s an idol, definitely has a room full of merchandise, people have caught him buying albums of his favorite group

Epel is the maknae, obviously, and was probably previously a background dancer. Vil saw him and picked him up by the scruff of his neck. He’s definitely the only real rapper of the group and can dance pretty well, but this is not the kind of group he wanted to be in. Epel was probably hoping for a concept a bit more like BxB but we don’t all get what we wish for

I listened to Nude while making this and it changed my entire vibe for their group. They’re just (g)-idle. If the music makes you wanna worship a woman it belongs to FoE.

Debut song: Love Dive by IVE

Other Tracks: Nude by (g)-idle; Oh my God by (g)-idle; Villain Dies by (g)-idle; Snapping by Chung Ha; Do Not Touch by Misamo of Twice; Cry For Me by Twice

Solo releases: Vengeance by Bibi (Vil)

Ignihyde 

What group

It’s just Idia

He’s probably a producer or sumthing let’s be so real guys. Ortho is his sound set up.

I’ll still give examples of what I think his tracks sound like tho. Lots of dubstep and generally electronic sounds cus… come on guys, it’s too perfect.

Tracks: Illusion by Aespa; Miroh by SKZ; Freeze by SKZ; Hold On Tight by Aespa

Diasomnia 

Group name: Som.nia (Nia), I wanted to lean into the sleepy/dream feeling

Fandom name: Niacs, insomnia/insomniac you get it okay

“Malleus is leader!” you cry, and you are wrong, because Lilia literally has to be leader. He is the objectively the best (and funniest) option, Malleus does not have the backbone to be leader yet. Lilia has been around the block a billion times; he’s been a vkei idol, he’s been a model, he’s probably been a wrestler let’s be real he’s the Sakura of twst fr. He writes most of the songs for the group, but is definitely trying to get the others to improve their songwriting skills. While Lilia gets a lot of offers, he turns them down. If I’m honest, he’s probably going to quit being an idol after 

Malleus is definitely taking the vocalist position, no question. He’s also probably taking the “least popular member of the group” position. Poor guy is seriously awkward on camera and has a chronic case of resting scary face. He takes center pretty frequently, half as an attempt to get him some more recognition- it’s not great cus he’s kinda a stiff dancer. He was fairly popular pre-debut for his extremely strange energy 

Call me insane, but dancer Silver! He’s very physically capable, it’s just… you’ll catch him sleeping every time he’s not practicing. Definitely has insane muscle memory, he could do all his choreography with his eyes closed. He’s also an occasional vocalist, he’s got a nice soft voice. Sebek is always getting on him for “being lazy” but Silver usually just tells him to screw off.

Sebek gets rapper because he’s sooooo good at projecting and enunciating aggressively. It’s all the Malleus worship. I think he was a trainee at the same time as Malleus and was utterly obsessed with him, fan favorite for being So Weird All The Time.

I’ll be so real, if the song made me feel gorgeous it went on the list. They kinda reek of 3rd gen Kpop? This is definitely Lilia’s fault. But I’m so here for it the nostalgia go CRAAAZY. Also they are VIXX thanks.

Debut Song: Butterfly by Loona

Other Tracks: Bite Me by Enhyphen; Chained Up by VIXX, Shangri-La by VIXX; Blood, Sweat and Tears by BTS (are you kidding me this addition is so good I’m genuinely LOSING IT); Scentist by VIXX; Fever by Enhyphen; Sugar Rush Ride by Enhyphen; Inception by ATEEZ

Solo releases: Egoist by Olivia Hye of Loona (Silver)

Honorable mentions (these are a bit shorter)

First year gang

Group name: F1rst

Fandom name: Zer0, because they come before first

Jack gets to be leader! He’s responsible, if a bit nervous, takes the vocalist position here.

Epel gets visual in this case, though he still does a fair amount of rap.

Deuce is the best with fans and gets to be center, he’s a pretty good all-rounder here.

Ace is still the best dancer in the group and literally will never stop gloating.

Sebek gets to be the rapper and takes the face position because he’s So Weird All The Time

I think they are literally just Stray Kids tbh, my favoritism is showing but I don’t even care

Debut Song: Break All the Rules by Cravity

Other Tracks: Super board by SKZ; Thunderous by SKZ; S-Class by SKZ; Domino by SKZ; TOPLINE by SKZ; God’s Menu by SKZ

Pop music club 

Group name: Jump Up! I wanted to pick something really cheery and high energy

Fandom name: Highs

Kalim is leader here again, he’s just got that energy! He also gets to be the rapper

Cater swipes the vocalist position, finally gets a chance to shine fr

Old man Lilia somehow bags the dancer position and is no question the face

They're peppy, poppy, a classic girl group type noise.

Debut song: Hi High by Loona was truly too perfect

Other tracks: Hula Hoop by Loona; Air Force One by Odd Eye Circle of ARTMS

Floyd + Che’nya + Ruggie

Group name: THEE (can be said like “thee” or “tee-hee”)

Fandom name: Teenies

Ruggie is the leader and lead dancer for this one! 

Seeing as Floyd has had dancer ripped from his hands by Ruggie, he’s going to fully take over rap

And Che’nya gets to be vocalist, I like to believe he’s got some pipes on him

Literally just silly vibes

Debut song: Cheese by SKZ

Other Tracks: Taller Than You by Mamamoo; Maniac by SKZ; Circus by SKZ; Don’t Tease Me by Speed 

Lilia + Malleus + Vil + Rook

Group name: Nu Moon

Fandom name: Starlights, yeah I stole it from VIXX, sue me

Malleus, king of goth, gets to lead this group- it’s a very good starter group to lead, considering he’s got a lot of experienced members

Lilia is quite obviously producing every single song for this group, that’s mostly what he’s here to do, so he also takes up the mantle of dancer

Vil is once again the visual and the face, but he’s giving up the vocalist position

Shock of shocks, Rook gets to be the vocalist here! Because he doesn’t get to shine much in FoE

They are literally dreamcatcher.

Debut song: BEcause by Dreamcatcher

Other tracks: Piri by Dreamcatcher; Odd Eye by Dreamcatcher; Boca by Dreamcatcher; Scream by Dreamcatcher

That's the end of today's showing, as always, thank you for coming.

Did anyone ask for this? uhhhh no. But it made me very happy so whatever. Legitimately Octavinelle gave me so much trouble I changed their tracklist like four times. I was tempted to make Diasomnia Dreamcatcher as well, but I didn't want to erase Silver's lo-fi soft boy vibes.

[jennasnotebook]

jobs i think the marauders & friends would have

james potter

- works at a sporting goods store

- he’s very knowledgeable and great at his job

- will definitely persuade you into buying something you don’t want or need

- “sir these nike airs will make you jump so incredibly high”

- always chewing gum and always getting yelled at for it by his boss

- hates working register, you’ll find him in the shoes section reading a magazine

- made the store playlist, he’s always on aux

- all his coworkers are really old but he still manages to get along really well with them

- has definitely grabbed a beer with the 50 year old cashier

sirius black

- movie theatre employee

- he hates his job so much. so much

- but he loves saying he works at a movie theatre because it sounds cool

- applied because he loves films and the smell of theatre popcorn

- works at the concession stand and steals extra large slushees (his go-to flavors are cherry and coke)

- he’s really bad at customer service but he’s naturally charming so it’s okay

- always has one airpod in

- coworkers love him because remus brings him food on his break that he shares with everyone

- never ever wears the hat that comes with his uniform because it’s ugly and makes his hair look bad

- definitely cries in the bathroom

remus lupin

- waiter at a nice restaurant downtown

- he’s actually quite rude but his dry humor and nice cheekbones charms people for some reason

- (gets horrible tips)

- has to wear a fully black outfit with a silly black bow tie, sirius thinks he looks handsome

- really good at bussing tables and rolling silverware

- steals fries from the kitchen

- sometimes they ask him to bartend and he really enjoys that

- the hostess girl adores him (sirius despises her)

- smokes near the dumpster on his break and then sits on the floor in the walk-in for a few minutes

- “can i speak to the manager?!”

- “ma’am i am the manager” (he’s lying)

peter pettigrew

- works at a gas station

- constantly forgets to check for ID

- free vape pods for his friends!!!!!!

- actually likes stocking shelves because he doesn’t have to talk to anyone

- always scared the store is gonna get robbed at gunpoint

- sees people steal but never says anything about it

- he literally never sees his boss around, where is that man???

- usually closing shift, he hates it

- reads comic books up front all the time, sometimes he’ll have really long conversations with customers about x-men

regulus black

- works drive-thru at a burger joint

- customer service is on point but after 8pm he turns into the biggest bitch on the face of the earth

- he just wants to go home

- sirius and james always drive by to troll him and order shakes

- sirius is really good at doing the karen voice and has actually fooled him almost every single time

- big brother behavior

- his uniform is rancid and smells like burger grease

- always having one sided competitions with other coworkers that nobody is in on except for him

- he loves oreo milkshakes

- ends up having to train the new hires but he’s so terrible at it

- “idk i think this is how you do it but im not sure”

- bad at counting change on the spot, he’ll start tearing up if you give him coins

lily evans

- second-hand bookstore employee

- started out as a volunteer but they actually ended up hiring her

- she doesn’t get enough hours

- works next to a coffee shop so she always grabs a cappuccino for james after her morning shifts

- gets to wear cute outfits but has to wear an ugly gray apron

- decorates it with pins

- remus always comes to visit her and they bitch about rude customers together

- he ends up helping her move heavy boxes

- her boss is this sweet weird hippie woman who somehow knows everyone personally

- the dusty books give her terrible allergies

- that girl is always sneezing and sniffling

- will talk your ear off about jane austen

[mellowwillowy]

𝐈

ii.

Blue has always enjoyed watching how your face contorts in joy when you are hit with inspiration. He also enjoys the face you make when you are troubled by the lack of idea and motivation to write anything, only capable of staring at the blank sheet on your computer screen.

Blue loves you however you are. Stressed, happy, upset, erratic, anyhow you are presented, he will love you unconditionally. To love is to accept someone unconditionally, even when they are nothing but a burden.

The teacher used to lecture about how a parent's love will forever be unconditional, despite the children doing something out of hand.

So what difference does it make if he is to apply it in his love for you? If a child manages to kill their own parents out of rage, the parents are forced to love their children unconditionally.

Because that's what the teacher taught him. "It is a form of love with no strings attached, therefore, parents love their children for who they are, no matter what."

His feelings for you have always been genuine no matter how many times have passed. In this world he decides to live to the fullest, he decides to understand how life works himself. He will not do his research and read the study of those intelligent bastards.

Because he has always been a prodigy what difference would it make should he deduce things himself?

Blue's attention is shifted toward you when you walk out of the bedroom, all dressed up. "Let's go, they are waiting for us by the station."

Blue's lip curves into a grin, a faint blush decorating his cheeks as he holds your hand in his, your bag in his hand while the two of you walk toward the door, "Today will be a rather sunny day, you have brought the sunscreen right?"

iii.

The trip to the train station is filled with laughter as Blue jokes around occasionally. Soon, the two of you have reached the station, trying to spot your friends.

There, you see a familiar tuft of yellow hair and purple hair. A man scrolling his phone with a woman vaping by the smoking area with a phone in her hand.

"Lemoooon! Graaape!" You run toward the figures with Blue following you from the back. Both of them look away from their phones and lock their eyes with yours.

The glasses-wearing man holds out his hand as though to warn you about bumping into someone before Blue himself pulls you into his body with his arm, saving you from an inconvenient bump toward a man running around with a cup of coffee in his hand.

Was it a coincidence that he could pull you back in time?

"Oh not only are you two late, you almost cause something so distasteful!" Lemon flicks your forehead as he chides you for being clumsy.

Grape keeps her vape in her jeans' pocket and fist-bumps Blue, "What keeps you two so long? Now let's go, we only have 5 minutes left before the train departs."

The four of you stand behind the yellow line, chatting to each other while occasionally bursting into laughter together. You elbow Lemon, teasing him, "Too bad my sister couldn't join us on this trip huh?"

It isn't audible for the others to hear but Blue somehow manages to chuckle. The speaker finally announces the train's arrival, and everyone starts to keep a hold of their belongings.

The train is not as packed as you expected since Blue has determined the perfect time for this trip, a time when everyone is occupied and a time when no sane people would visit the beach.

"A shame we can only lock ourselves in the villa because of the typhoon." Grape grumbles as she checks the weather's forecast.

Lemon exclaims, "I think we are quite adventurous enough to wander near the sea when a typhoon is about to hit us."

Everyone looks toward Blue who is only grinning, his fingers do not stop typing on his phone's keyboard, "But this is the only time we can use my villa~ oh trust me, it will be a fun trip."

"Why do you make me bring sunscreen if we are only going to stay indoors?" "Ahh..."

Blue looks away from you and focuses on his phone instead, "It's a perfect opportunity for you to find inspiration right~? Imagine a murder happening when we can not leave because of the typhoon?"

"We were talking about sunscreen, you idiot." with a kick to his shin from Grape, you can only shake your head in unison with Lemon. The speaker announces the train's departure and all of you begin to scramble for seats.

You look out from your seat's window, the sky slowly turning gray. Who would go to the beach in such weather? But your lover's face shows nothing but bliss, enjoying the gloomy sky from your window.

[dylanmunson]

Night out / JQ

Summary; your out in town with some friends when a certain someone asks if they can borrow a lighter.

Fluff/ angst… I’m a whore for this man, I apologise. It’s a mess and I’m not even sorry

Word count; 0.8k

Masterlist | wattpad | Eddie fic

It was Friday night and your friend Nicky had asked if I wanted to join her,her boyfriend and a few friends of there’s, out in London for the night. I agreed, having nothing better to do. I get up from my bed and look through my clothes deciding on a simple black dress, popping a denim jacket over it, pairing it with my trusty docs.

Adding a bit of makeup and grabbing my back of things before walking out the door and getting the train into town to meet my loser friends.

We’d been at the bar for a while now, Nicky and her partner dancing and making out mid dance floor for the most part. One of her friends joins me outside where I lean against the tall, drink in one hand and vape in the other.

I don’t smoke, we’ll not often, more just social situations, taking a drag I look at the friend as she babbles about some dude that she was dancing with.

“I’m so sorry, do you have a lighter I could borrow?” I turn to the voice and am met with these gorgeous brown eyes “I uh yeah” I nod digging through my bag and handing him a lighter I had stolen from a friend.

“Thanks love” he smiles lighting his cig, taking a drag before handing it back to me. “Sorry have we met before?” He chuckles, raising a brow looking at me up and down.

I shake my head “not that I know of?” I say turning my body towards the man, then it hits me where I know him from “your Eddie! Eddie munson!” I chuckle, “ah ya caught me” he grins taking another drag. “Sorry, sorry, I’m y/n” I smile softly at the taller man in front of me.

“Joe, Joseph, but you knew that” he smiles softly, I nod “sorry” I groan, taking another drag of my vape “start over?” He grins I nod.

The friend who was outside with me, now disappearing into the crowd. “Y/n” I smile, he chuckles “Joseph, but you can call me Joe, or Joseph, I don’t mind” he smiles pulling me into a small side hug. I nod grinning. “Enjoying your night?” I smile taking a sip of my drink, he nods sighing slightly taking another drag “sorry” he chuckles blowing the smoke over his shoulder so it doesn’t blow into my face.

“It’s fine honestly” I chuckle, looking down at my drink, which is now nearly empty. “Wanna join me for a round?” He smiles looking down at me “oh I don’t wanna intru—“ “it’s alright sweet” he chuckles, stomping out the cig butt with his boot. “Come” he chuckles I grin following behind the tall man, as he walks to the bar ordering us two dirty martini’s. After taking both drinks he leads us back outside, sitting at one of the benches in the middle.

“So” he chuckles handing me the drink. I chuckle sitting opposite him “sooo” I grin taking a sip of the drink.

We begin talking about everything and anything, it being surprisingly easy to talk to the man, that I don’t notice the 10 missed calls from Nicky.

“Oh my days y/n I’ve been ringing you for the past hour!” Nicky sighs coming up behind me “you have?” I frown fishing my phone out of my bag “shit sorry nick” I chuckle, Joseph just smirks “that would be my fault” he grins looking at the red head behind me. “Joe” he smiles “I know who you are” she chuckles dryly, the alcohol in her system making her ever so slightly more bitchy and blunt towards the gorgeous man in front of me.

“Nicky…” I say “right we’re heading home” she hiccups, I chuckle “alright, text me when you get there ok” I nod, her boyfriend coming up behind her. Him nodding his head mumbling a quick apology for his girlfriend, knowing she can be a handful when drunk.

“Sorry about that” I sigh as they walk away. Joseph just chuckles taking a drag of his newly lite cig. “S’alright” he smiles “not joining them?” I shake my head “I’m alright here for the time being if that’s ok” I grin taking a sip of my five drink of the evening, knowing I should swap out for a soft drink or water after this.

“S‘’ more than fine love” he grins we continue talking away, I wrap my jacket around my body a little tighter as a gust of wind blows past us. “Cold?” I shake my head grinning “wanna head out?” He mumbles, “I uhh sure” I chuckle, moving to stand up but wobbling in the process. “Whoa” he chuckles coming to my side wrapping an arm around my waist. “Get you some water huh” he chuckles as we walk back through the bar and into the chilly street, it now being early hours of the morning as we do.

Munson tag list

@alicefallsintotherabbithole  @steves-robin + @onlydruig @tenderhornynihilist  + @itsyouimagines @witchsbitchestime @kyomiite @girl-with-an-orange-cat @flatoust11 @udontcarethisshit @chloepricerk800 @kellysimagines @caitfrogs @tinkbasically @stephanie-lkj @get-me-to-wonderland @bdpst-massacre @lagataprrr @goldenharrysworld @oo0lady-mad0oo @smxling @presidential-facts @qu7nn  @pleasantlycrazyworld  @ladyapplejackdnd @little-cupcake17  @meaganjm  @dixontardis   @megsrose @chaos-incorp @sourbutcalm143 @lieblingsmenzch @lieblingsmenzch @kbakery  @positivevibesnlif3 @stcastwh00re @greatfandomsgalore   @yandere-nctsstuff   @eddies-gf-86  @mariar597   @lothiriel9  @kennedyssmile @lesliemcawesome @chrisevansmarvelmcu @zdarie  @notbeforelong @jayy-sins

[cyanidedrinkers]

Name: Arlo Edwards

Age: 30

Gender: Male Ethnicity: White Nationality: Australian Languages: Spanish, English, and very Little French

Nickname(s): Otter and The Personality

Rank: Captain Occupation: Medic Skin Tone: Olive Eye Color: Green Hair Color: Red-ish brown Hair Length: Short undercut. 

Height: 6’0

Weight: 150 Tattoos: He has his enlistment date on his shoulder and picture of an otter. (For easy identification) Personality: Normally, Arlo is the life of the party. He’s a good contrast to Andy’s calm yet sarcastic demeanor as he is a ball of energy and will talk your ear off if needed. The more emotion he feels the thicker his australian accent gets and if you really get him going he’s not very understandable. The only person to even dare to make any sense of what he is saying is Ruby. You can normally find him chatting up his superiors or sharing a drink with the privates when he’s off work. 

Likes: Pixie sticks, Vegemite, Fairy bread, Being overly aggressive with assholes on the field, and breaking into Andy or Ruby’s room at night and ranting to them about random facts.  

Dislikes: People who cut him off, Soft talkers, long meetings, American chocolate (Him and Andy fight on this all the time), and 

Habit(s): Smoking/Vaping, Not knocking before entering a room, writing on his arm with a pen to keep track of things, making note of every exit, and Piking up random pets.

Flaw(s): Forgetful, Touchy, He can be loud and not even realize it, He also tends to forget personal space and will just wrap his arm around someone willy nilly.

Reputation: He gets along with a lot of the privates. He's the fun captain that will make up silly games an brings a deck of cards to play poker on. He's also the first to bring back wounded soldiers and will never leave someone behind, His own life be damned, He's never left a soldier behind and he doesnt plan on it. If he has to throw you over his shoulder as he guns down the enemies he will. He is also known for just grabbing snakes and throwing them out of their way like their footballs or, If he likes them, taking them back to the base. Backstory: Arlo grew up in the shit backwards part of Australia. He was the class clown, and has always had a good attitude. When he graduated though he realized he never really knew what he wanted to do. So, he did the next best thing and joined the Army. While in bootcamp he meet Ruby. Despite Ruby constantly pushing him away and telling him to shut up he persisted and soon won over the mans heart. They spent the rest of their training together and getting in trouble. Aka, Arlo doing something stupid and Ruby bailing him out.

[anjaelle]

Warped | Pt. II

· · ─────── ·𖥸· ─────── · ·

Characters: Jake "Hangman" Seresin x Black!Reader x Mickey "Fanboy" Garcia Summary: You're in the middle of what's possibly a CO2 fueled hallucination, and you're curious to see how long this lasts before you just kick the bucket. Warnings: Language Word Count: 2.4K a/n: My first attempt at a throuple with two different relationship dynamics. Kind of excited to see where this goes.

Part I | Masterlist | ꩜The Warped Mixtape ꩜

· · ─────── ·𖥸· ─────── · ·

You woke up in the passenger seat of a pickup truck, leaning your heavy head against the cool window. A power ballad you vaguely remember hearing in passing crooned softly through the radio speakers. The driver drummed on the steering wheel and you couldn't help but notice the way he hummed slightly off key.  

The downtown storefronts passed by in a slow neon and beige blur, so you shut your eyes to keep yourself from puking. 

“Hey! Look who decided to wake up!”

You groaned, taking a deep breath, “Sssshit.” 

You sat up in your seat, briefly glancing over to find the blonde man from the hotel regarding you with a raised brow. 

“Can’t handle the heat, huh?” He shook his head, “You’re lucky I’ve got these arms of steel and fast reflexes or you would’ve hit the ground like a bag of rocks.” 

He took the opportunity to flex his left arm that draped lazily over the steering wheel. It was nice to know the thrumming pang in your head wasn’t from a concussion. You instinctively reached for your phone in your pocket, only to find your car keys. 

“Ugh, where’s my phone?” You mumbled, searching your other pocket and coming up short.

You could feel him burning a hole into the side of your face every time he took his eyes off the road to look at you.

“Oh my god, what?”

“You keep babbling about bizarro shit, y’know. And a ‘thank you’ would’ve been kinda nice.” He rolled his eyes and turned the radio up louder, making your head pound even more. 

“Thank you,” you said, rubbing your temples, “for making sure I don’t crack my head open on the floor of your hotel. Because we both know you can’t afford the lawsuit.” 

He snorted good naturedly, which wasn’t the reaction you expected. But you were just glad he gave you the grace to be a bit of a bitch while you tried to get your wits together. 

“Sorry, um…” 

“Jake.” He finished for you.

“Sorry, Jake.” You apologized, “I’m just…it’s been a long day. I’m not trying to be a monster.” 

“You sure?” 

It was your turn to snort. The car’s AC wasn’t super strong, but it did feel significantly cooler than it did in the hotel. You hovered your hand over the fan and goosebumps raised along your forearms. 

“Ginny thought it’d be a good idea to take you on a drive in the cool air. AC’s busted in the staff room, so this was the only option. …Why’d you faint, anyway?” He asked. Less out of obvious concern and more out of abrasive curiosity. 

You shrugged, but kept your eyes trained on the road. “Too much to drink last night, I guess. I’m probably just dehydrated and hungover, or something.” 

He drummed his fingers on the wheel and tsked, “You girls never know how to handle your alcohol. You’ll go into another town for vacation, split a bottle of Johnny Walker. Next thing you know you’re practicing your mechanical bull techniques on the bartender-slash-front desk guy.”

There was silence between you, save Steven Tyler’s soaring falsetto crackling through the speakers.

“So you fuck the hotel guests.”

“Not all the guests,” he glanced at you and tried to hide his growing smirk, “just the hot ones.”

If vapes existed, you're sure he would've taken a hit of it now for emphasis. In lieu of a response, you watched the passing town outside of your window.

What was the last thing you remembered before blacking out? 

It’s 1989.

It couldn’t have been. Yeah, there were a bunch of old cars around. And people were speaking differently. And you can’t find your cell phone anywhere, and this town seems to pray at the altar of Ronald Reagan. Maybe you’re being kidnapped and brainwashed. Maybe you’re suffering from carbon monoxide poisoning and this is your vivid dream as death approaches.

That’s it. You were dreaming. Who cares if the sun beating down on you through the window felt all too real, and you could feel the vibrations of the radio through your skin? It was all fake. A complex hallucination. 

“Alright. C’mon, Olive Oyl.” The engine cut and you realized you’d pulled to a stop in front of a small pharmacy.

“Olive Oil?” 

“Always fainting? Needs a big, strong man to help her. Olive Oyl! You know.” He climbed out of his car before you had time to tell him his nickname sucked, and he needed to workshop a new one. You watched him round the front of the car and bang on the hood with his knuckle, “Chop, chop! Let’s fuckin’ go, Princess. Hurry up.” 

You felt your eye twitch. But you reluctantly complied, pushing the door open to climb out of the truck. He didn’t even wait for you to fully exit the car before he strode into the store and shut the door behind him. 

┉┈◈◉◈┈┉

The inside was freakishly clean and bright white. Fluorescent lights buzzed overhead, casting a weird glow over everything in the store. If they were trying to mirror the unnerving feeling of walking into a doctor’s office, they nailed it. Or your dreams were very good at hyperrealism. If you were still buying that delusion, anyway. Your eyes scanned the shelves and you were faced with some products you’d never be able to pronounce. You wondered why you were even here to begin with. You probably should’ve asked before you got out of the car. 

“I don’t have time for this shit, Mick.” You heard Jake groan at the other end of the store. 

You heard laughter and someone drumming on a countertop, “C’mon, bro. Loosen the stick up your ass sometime.” 

In the brief time that you’d known Jake, you’d hardly classify him as the anal retentive type. Then again, he could've easily been putting up a front. 

“I’m just here for the prescriptions. That’s it.” 

"Don't tell me you're still upset about that girl--"

"AH AH!" Jake clapped, cutting the other guy off, "Prescriptions. Ixnay on the girl...thing."

There was a brief pause in the conversation as his friend opened some drawers and shuffled some objects around out of view. You peeked from behind a shelf to see Jake shifting uncomfortably from foot to foot. Admittedly, it tickled you to see someone manage to break down his bravado. And with such little effort. As if sensing your questioning stare, he stopped shifting and turned to wink at you.

"Liking the view?"

"There's not much of a view to look at." You strolled to meet him at the counter.

"It's fine," he shrugged, leaning over with his elbows resting on the spotless linoleum countertop, "I'll be here when you stop living in denial."

Hearing you approach, Jake's friend popped up from behind a shelf and shot you a wide smile.

"Well that's a new face. What's up?" He tossed a white paper bag of pill bottles at Jake and extended a hand to you, "I'm Mickey."

You introduced yourself and shook his hand, "Nice to meet you. I like your shirt." You nodded at the intricately designed band tee peeking out from behind his lab coat and his eyes lit up.

"You like Mötley Crüe?"

"Aaand now we're leaving." Jake said grabbing you by the shoulders and guiding you away from the counter.

But Mickey hopped over the counter and fell into step beside you. "No offense, but you don't really look like the type."

"I don't like them. I do take offense. And you don't look like the type, either."

He chuckled and ran his fingers through his hair. Because of course he did. Now you understood how Mickey and Jake were friends.

"Touche."

Jake pretended to gag behind you, and released your shoulders to push the front door open. You were immediately smacked in the face with the desert heat. And when you swayed on your feet, you immediately reached out to grab someone's arm.

"Whoa, whoa, hey." Jake wrapped a strong arm around your waist and Mickey held onto your hand as the world seemed to spin around you.

You heard the echos of Justin Timberlake's SexyBack in the distance, and you furrowed your brows in confusion.

"What the hell?" You slurred.

"What?" "We didn't say anything." The boys said. You didn't even notice them carrying you back into the pharmacy until you were seated on a plush chair behind the counter.

You took slow breaths, resting your elbows on your knees as the music seemed to fade out of your consciousness.

"You guys don't hear that?"

They said nothing, but you strained to hear the last of the bass as it seemed to disappear entirely. You were thoroughly confused, you felt drunk, and you wanted to lie down. You were sure you looked insane to them. Mickey passed you a tiny dixie cup of water and you gave him a small smile in thanks.

"So..." Jake knocked on the counter and leaned on it in front of you, "What were you saying you heard?"

A deep sigh rushed out of you, "You're just gonna laugh at me."

Mickey snorted, "Maybe."

"I might. No promises."

"Then why the fuck would I tell you?" You whined, frustrated with the circumstances over the last 24 hours. You just wanted to go home. Fuck the desert.

They exchanged glances with one another and Jake nodded.

"Go ahead, crazy girl."

Mickey punched him, "Stop before she stabs you."

"I'm not going to stab anyone, and I'm not crazy...I don't think."

"You sound crazy to me." Jake grumbled.

You ignored their antics and weighed the options before sighing again.

"I'm from 2022. Well...technically 2023. I don't know anymore. One of them. It's supposed to be 2023 now. I drove here from another town trying to meet my friends. I stopped just to sleep, I woke up, and everyone's saying it's 1989. I'm--hallucinating. Clearly. Because I called my mom at the hotel, and my grandmother answered. But that's impossible, because my grandma died when I was a kid. And I know it was her, because she called my mom by her first name. But my mom was a teenager. And I can't find my fucking cell phone and my car isn't my car. All I have is this goddamn pager I don't even know how to use." You pulled it out of your pocket and flung it across the counter.

"I don't even understand what the hell is going on. And it's hot. And I'm tired. And I'm hearing Justin Timberlake in the middle of the desert. And I'm not even going to explain who that is, because I know you people won't know who he is for another 10 years. Or at least you'll pretend you don't know. Because apparently everyone here is in a goddamn cult, and I'm your latest victim. And at this point it's only been less than 24 hours but if this is your method of psychological torture, I'd rather you just take me out into the middle of nowhere and shoot me."

After you finally finished, the only other sound filling the silence was the 50's pop standard wafting through the speakers of the shop.

Jake semi-gently grabbed your chin and tilted your head up to look at him. His grip was stronger than you were used to, and you were not accustomed to random men touching your face. He raised his brows at you like someone talking to a child.

"Are you done now?"

You raised your brow at him and the way he seemed to try and condescend to you. The way he gripped your cheeks in his one hand was overly familiar, considering you only knew him for one day. You had mixed feelings about it. You pushed his hand away.

"Don't touch my face, I don't know where your nasty hands have been."

"You're hysterical," he said, holding back a smug grin, "Just a little desert mania, that's all."

You thought of arguing, but you knew it wasn't going to prove anything. Talking to him was useless. But you could see Mickey peering at you curiously out of the corner of your eye, so you directed your attention to him.

"Go ahead, ask me anything. You look like you might believe me."

Jake tossed his hands in the air and turned his back to the both of you, "I can't fucking believe this."

"Well, I mean..." Mickey's eyes shifted between the two of you. He shoved his hands in the pockets of his jeans and leaned back against the counter, "If you're from the future--which would be fucking crazy--who's going to be our next president?"

You thought about it for a second. "It's Reagan now? George H.W. Bush is about to get sworn in right? And then after that, Bill Clinton, because George H.W. Bush is only getting one term. And then Bill will get two. Then George's son George W. Bush will get two terms--"

"She could just be making this up." Jake mumbled into his hand.

You rolled your eyes and huffed, crossing your arms. "Fine, ask me about something that'll happen later this year, if you think I'm lying."

He thought about it a little harder, but then Jake swiveled around and perked up.

"Who's gonna win the Super Bowl?"

You shuffled through your internal rolodex of meaningless sports shit your parents instilled in you. Any other time you wouldn't remember jack shit, but there was something specific about '89 that your dad was always raving about.

"Who's playing?" You asked, rolling the answer around in your head.

He laughed, "You don't know?"

"Just answer the question." You responded, cutting your eyes at him.

"The Bengals and the 49ers."

Oh!

"The 49ers are going to win," you said, tiredly, "Um...I know there will be a tie at half-time. And the score will be like, I don't know, 15-20 or 16-20. Or something."

Mickey raised his brows at you and then looked over at his friend, "Are you going to bet on this?"

Jake looked you over and worked his jaw in deep contemplation, "I'll bite, Crazy Girl. If you're right, I'll believe you. If you're wrong, I'm getting my money back from you and tossing you into the outskirts."

Oh wow, because that was the thing you cared most about. You slumped back in the chair, completely over being interrogated. Mickey sat on the arm beside you, gently nudging you with his elbow.

"If you're really from the future...do we have flying cars in 2023?"

"No."

He frowned, and you immediately wanted to fix it. It didn't look right on him. You nudged him back.

"But you can carry a whole library of music in your pocket on a portable device. And it's touchscreen."

He grinned at you and you felt your cheeks warm up, despite everything. At least someone was being nice to you.

"Sweet!" He said.

"Alright," Jake clapped once and pushed himself off the counter, "enough with the bullshit. I came for the drugs, now I gotta head back." He looked down at you and pursed his lips, "Can you walk, or do I gotta carry you?"

The thought of his hands on you made your eye twitch, so you pushed yourself up and spun around to show that you were alright.

"Great, get your ass moving," he said, pushing the counter door open so you could pass, "Because I wasn't gonna carry you."

"I wasn't gonna carry you." You mocked in a low voice with a slight southern twang as you passed him.

"Real mature."

[thatmexisaurusrex]

SamBucky Holiday Fic Snippet

Hey, people! Remember when I said I had an idea for my “wrong number”, “bad pickup lines”, and possibly “blind date” choices from the poll I did over a month back that’s totally going to tie into my Sambucky Festive Season Bingo Card choice? Here's a little snippet of the multi-chapter fic I'm making. Enjoy! 🥰

*****

“Whore house, whore speaking.”

Sam might have walked into one of the giant, giant poles in the subway.

“Bucky?” exclaimed Sam, rubbing his face as he waited for his train.

The subway was funky. A strange and pungent smell that Sam was sure he’d never get used to; urine, rank weed, horrible cotton candy vape smoke, dead rat, and hot trash somehow even in the cold of December. There were way too many mystery puddles on this particular platform too.

“You’re the only person who calls the landline. That and telemarketers,” said Bucky, “And scammers. If you can say there’s a difference between the two.”

“It’s only because I keep forgetting that Steve gave me his landline the first time I asked him for his number,” bemoaned Sam, feeling a little more pathetic, “Why haven’t I changed his first number to his cell phone on my phone?”

“Don’t ask me, I don’t know. I’m just glad that we get to have these little chats sometimes,” said Bucky, and Sam could hear the fucker smiling on the other side of the line.

“Yes. Great. Just. Great to have impromptu calls with you,” mumbled Sam, watching the train slow down, “I’ll – I’ll call him on his cell – ”

“Hold up there, cowboy – ” Bucky started as Sam snorted.

“Cowboy?” said Sam, a little exasperated as he got on the train.

“I’m trying out nicknames. Let me experiment,” said Bucky on the other side of the phone.

Sam snickered as he held onto a pole.

“Just tell me how the date went? Didn’t you just go on one with Alisande?” asked Bucky and before Sam could ask, he added, “Stevie can’t keep a secret if his life depended on it. Did she say yes to meeting your family?”

Sam remembered why he was calling Steve.

Was Sam going to confess this to Bucky? Bucky the Roommate Barnes? A dude that Sam just kept crossing paths with because he was Steve’s friend? The man he kept accidentally calling because Steve was weird and set up a landline and Bucky was always at home?

‘Yes’ was the answer, apparently, since Sam said, “Well. She. Kind of. Dumped. Me?”

“I thought you two were all right,” said Bucky, offended on Sam’s behalf.

“I thought so too!” said Sam, feeling vindicated, “But ‘all right’ wasn’t where she wanted to be. So, she dumped me.”

Sam felt eyes on him. Because he was on a train. And people eavesdropped. He tried not to think about that too hard.

“Okay, how are we handling this? Do I beat her up for you? Do we talk shit about her over a bunch of beers? Need a romcom to cry over? Do you like romcom movies? My favorite might be You’ve Got Mail, but it’s also kind of weird too. Do I need to send a meticulously written letter detailing how she made a terrible mistake?” asked Bucky, no hesitation, Sam smiling on the other side of the line.

Because it was sweet. Weird and sweet.

“No, she’s – we’re good. We’re surprisingly good,” said Sam, still confused by how little this was affecting him.

Sam sighed as he got off the train and found his way to the street. Brownstones and smaller apartment complexes dusted with snow spattered his view, with one small empty lot transformed into a combo vegetable garden and park a few brownstones down.

Sam could turn into that park. Maybe sit down near the snow and the slush. Assess his life and his choices. Maybe give himself a moment alone.

He didn’t, though.

He walked past it. He kept moving forward without much thought about where he would be next. He was pretty sure he knew where his feet would take him. But still. He wasn’t thinking about it.

“It’s weird, right?” continued Sam as he found his way to Steve’s apartment, “That I’m so okay with this? That I’m not feeling torn up?”

“Maybe she was right. Maybe it was for the best,” said Bucky softly, hesitantly.

Sam gazed up at Steve’s apartment.

Bucky’s too, Sam supposed.

Bucky was up there. Steve wasn’t. Or maybe he was?

No.

Steve would have hopped on the line if he was up there.

“Do you have any beers up there, Barnes?” asked Sam.

Sam watched as Bucky stumbled to his living room window and smushed his face into it to look at Sam. Sam wouldn’t say it was adorable. Okay. Maybe in that ugly way. Smushy, squishy chipmunk cheek pushed up onto that window as Bucky gazed down at Sam.

“What do you think?” asked Bucky, waving at Sam from above.

[thestalkerbunny]

So like.

Staff day went okay.

Lemme outline some hot points. Lemme just SHARE my Day with you guys.

(content warning for mentions about shootings cause that I was literally 4 hours of my day having to listen to that, but it was mostly 'what to do in a scary situation' advice. Nothing in depth, just general stuff)

-Had breakfast there. I got a tangerine and some baby muffins. It was rather nice.

-Learned from my coworkers who were also there cause it was ALL the workers from every branch-that in the 3 days I had off, the guy who keeps SMOKING in the bathrooms is back, is now VAPING, blew a vape cloud in a child's face and then followed a female patron out of the building to make a sexual comment on her FEET. This is apparently not his first FOOT BASED OFFENSE HERE and makes me glad I wear closed toe shoes at all times when I'm out and about.

-Opening words/statements/awards for the librarians who have been on the job for nearly 20 plus years. This is blazed through in less than 10 minutes.

-THEN WE GET TO WHAT WE'RE ALL THERE FOR. The 'What to do during an active shooting' seminar with some kind of group that specializes in showing people what to do in said crisis as well as evaluating public buildings to make sure they're secure in case of said crisis.

-A lot of statistics. Stressful statistics. Upsetting Statistics.

-Know your corners people; Corners save LIVES -Seminar Lady talking about how it's important to find secure corners where a gunman cannot do the weird angle around and fire at you. Those of us who went to public schools in the last past decade know what I'm talking about when I say the safe corners of the room

A morbid thought. But I will now take corners into valid consideration more often than I usually do.

-We also review some footage, mainly diagrams n stuff, etc etc. best advice given was 'don't fucking STOP RUNNING once you're out-fucking put some DISTANCE on you and that bitch-only YOU can tell if you feel safe.' and 'fucking car doors won't protect you-bullets go through that shit like paper, find CONCRETE, Brick WALL, Building Support beams.'

-After very upsetting statistics and advice on corners, locked doors, etc. etc. We break for catered lunch. It is burgers and weenies with banana pudding on the side. Weenies were great, the burger was kinda red in the middle and I didn't care too much for that. A lovely lunch in honest option.

-After Lunch. Hands on Demonstration.

-First we're instructed on how to disarm an armed individual with a gun, different methods for different guns, it is important to portray confidence and aggression in the situation because it's a you or them situation and you must come out on top. Lady said you have full authority in the situation to make sure that son of a bitch stays DOWN until more help arrives.

-It is then followed up with this short 5'5 lady showing us how to do the unauthorized choke hold and then she said 'OKAY. NOW YA'LL ARE GONNA DO IT ON EACH OTHER'

-Bestillmybeatingheat.jpg- -It's just like BIBLE CAMP ALL OVER AGAIN.-

-We have to take partners and in a supervised controlled situation with the trained demonstrators who know what to look for teach us how to choke a bitch out. My partner had arms the sizes of babies and I did forewarn him that the last person that did that to me did, recieved a bite out of my natural reaction. I did graze him a bit with my teeth-but other than that, he was fine. Weird sensation. Highly did not care for it.

-My turn to choke him out. Forgot that he-my constant coworker-is a man of many many weird body quirks and one of them is a sort of low LOW response to pain/pressure. He's just patting his legs and humming while I'm trying to choke him out. He's also like 6ft tall and I'm 5'5 so it's like a goblin yeeting itself up to choke an orc.

-We get to the next part which is how to apply a tourniquet. Which I will tell you, applying it to yourself, hurts like a fucking BITCH. Which it's supposed to I guess? Cause the point is to stop blood from escaping your meaty flesh prison. But I won't lie, I REALLY did not care for it considering how they had to go around and check and make sure everyone did it right and I'm standing here, my arm going numb and having to stand at the same time-not a fun combo.

-We follow that up with how to treat different kinds of wounds, emergency wound dressing, the need to make sure any hole put in the torso area is covered with a seal cause air is not the torso's friend when you have a hole in it. Honestly interesting stuff. I would do a more Indepth class if they had it. I feel like emergency first aid should be taught in general schools as a sort of part of home ec. Cooking, Money Management, Medical First Aid. Just as a valuable general life skill.

-Closing words, a drawing for gift cards that I didn't enter cause they all seemed kinda crummy gift cards. I leave. I go home. I pass out in my bed for nearly 5 solid hours because I'm so exhausted.

Tl;dr: Know your corners, air is not the torso wound's friend-learn to choke a bitch.

This all also made me want to fucking take up judo? Or one of those sports where you learn to flip someone regardless of size based on leverage and center of gravity.

[hungry-4-both]

BREAKING: The woman who was sitting right behind Lauren Boebert when Boebert was kicked out of the Beetlejuice musical in Denver spills the beans on exactly what happened to the MAGA congresswoman and it's utterly humiliating.

According to the theatergoer — who is pregnant — the gun nut representative was belting out the songs "loudly with her hands in the air" and completely ruining the experience for the people around her.

Boebert is not a trained signer so one can only imagine what that squawking sounded like to people who paid good money for the show.

"I’ve never seen anyone act like that before," said the woman who witnessed it.

As if that weren't enough, Boebert's "outrageous" conduct included nonstop vaping, subjecting those around her to the noxious fumes.

When the woman — who again it must be stressed is pregnant — asked Boebert to stop, the congresswoman simply said "no."

On top of that, Boebert filmed the show for extended stretches, something which is not allowed, and spent much of the time "kissing the man she was with."

At intermission, the woman asked an usher if she could switch seats to escape Boebert. The usher told her: "You’re not the first complaint [we’ve] had."

Boebert eventually called the woman a "sad and miserable person," proving that the MAGA freak is every bit as unpleasant as she seems in the media.

Soon after the confrontation, Boebert was finally ejected from her seat. Now if only we could eject her from Congress too...

[fuckmyskywalker]

hi angel :) i'm not sure if you've already gone on your bus ride yet, but i promise you, it's gonna be totally okay :) i've been using public transport for years now, i used to get the train and then the bus to get to secondary school since i was 11, it's like second nature to me now, but believe me i'm aware of how nerve-wracking it can be, especially when the crowd on it aren't really your type of crowd...

when i started uni, i had to use a bus from home to get to school, and it was filled with icky guys (i went to an all girls school, so i went like 5 years, from like 11-16, without interacting with a single guy that wasn't family or teachers) who liked to blow vape smoke into my face and verbally harass a couple of my friends and i, for a whole host of things, mainly for the way i dressed (in all fairness i either look like a whimsigoth love witch who's going to curse your entire bloodline or a rockstar with ribbon in her hair who's written an entire album about some summer fling)

but it's gonna be completely okay, usually plugging in some music helps and maybe just staring out the window (usually my bus rides are the time i either try to catch up on reading or more often than not fantasising abt hayden💀) anyways don't stress about it too much, it'll pass quickly and besides most often than not people usually mind their own businesses on the bus, so if it's the people you're worried about, i wouldn't stress about it too much!

anyways good luck :)) it's all going to be totally okay

-🎸

(god i'm such an oversharer, sorry💀)

I love your oversharing, it's so intriguing. Thank you so much for your advice and your sweet words mi amorcita. I don't think anyone has the right to bother an teenager at the bus, ew.

Fortunately, today was raining and my man was free after my classes, and our buildings are a few blocks away so I walked to his building and he is giving me a ride home, just stopping for some burgers<3. I'm glad men can do one thing right, for once. I think until tomorrow I'll have to take the bus, still nervous but oh well— growing up is funny ig.

[vellichorom]

Ok i give in, who is stanely parable so i can join the fandom

Stanley Parable, also known simply as " Stanley " ( also speculated to be Stanley Ridley, at that ), is the protagonist & namesake OF The Stanley Parable, & that is pretty much it in terms of his character canonically.

he is, in essence, a vessel that the player uses to interact with the game, cemented - i believe? by the fact he doesn't say a word during the game ( although implied he's " trained not to talk " by the Narrator, horrifying ) & barely interacts with his environment beyond what you, as the player, make him do / interact with ( the one instance I can think that he acts on his own is that one escape pod ending w/ the bucket - but spoilers )

HOWEVER, he's got backstory, lovingly spoonfed by my favorite Narrator & remains ( mostly ) solid no matter how you play the game, in which - he works a simple office job pushing buttons, lives in a(n art deco themed ) apartment, has a wife(?), & he's the most vanilla man in the universe.

& then certain other details about him shift depending on what route you take / what ending you get & how much you want to actually BELIEVE the Narrator concerning what he says about stanley -- for instance, he NEEDS a bucket ( an actual bucket ) in order to stay sane & is willing to kill himself out of spite

- & then of course there's the " kevan brighting canon " regarding the Narrator AND Stanley but that's mostly shitposty tweets & not to be taken seriously unless you're me, & what can i say there except stanley's not into water/sports but does vape. ( the tweets are a FUCKING ride i recommend them if you want a real mindfuck )

& IT'S TAKEN ME THIS LONG TO REALIZE you probably would have preferred a description of the GAME rather than the lameass protagonist but... I am silly,

but I definitely recommend you experience the game for YOURSELF in order to really get it, because the TDLR is simply - office job simulator, I extra double promise it's totally fine & normal & won't blow your tits clean off to play it

[lapeaudelamemoire]

I walk past the vape shop.

At the bar, I have only a cup of mulled cider; it doesn't taste like alcohol.

Walking up the bend in the street out from the train station I think of K and that sense of throwing caution to the wind that is running graff and realise that times like these what I miss is that, the expenditure of energy on something that you feel invincible about, the running, the laughing afterwards, the having gotten away with it, tripwire high.

All that energy that has to go somewhere.

I think of Anne Carson's The Glass Essay and that line - You remember too much. / Where do I put it down?

I tell a client today to put all of her stuff down in a box and give it to me, and I'll keep it in a corner of the room until I see her next, a room she doesn't know is borrowed today, that isn't my usual regular room. This is a space for you, I say; collect these things all day. And then passing under a bleak tree the words 'Leave it at the door' but I think it's followed me home, or that's my own stuff. I had supervision today, but stepping out of the train I think, it's like mutual aid where the same few dollars get passed around by the same people. Where do they put it down? The client passes it to me who passes it to my supervisor who passes it to their supervisor who passes it to their therapist who passes it— The Ring or that in It Follows. We just keep passing it on. Where do I put it down? Does it get put down?

I take my clothes off at the door. Siken: I take my hands off and offer them to you but you don't want them, so I take them back and put them back on, the wrong way, the wrong wrists. A man goes down to the river and throws away his sadness but then he's still left with his hands. I take my hands off. I peel my skin off. I scoop my eyes out of their sockets and put them in a glass of water next to the bed for the night and go to sleep in utter dark. I take my hands off and put them down. I take my hands off and put them back on the wrong way, the wrong wrists.

Where do we put it down?

Picture someone running purposefully neck-first right into someone else's arm held out horizontal, like a garrote, the flop backwards, like a Tiktok prank or something. Run straight into it, flop.

ADHD Venn diagram with something else, maybe OCD: Intrusive thoughts. Dig your eyes out take your hands off some thought always a little but not too loud sounding in my brain. And I think — is that me or them? Aren't I just reading about me, looking at me? Reflect the client but so they reflect me too we reflect each other. Is it you or me? Is it you or is it (also) me?

Why am I saying this I am taking my hands off and putting them somewhere I am taking my tongue off cut neatly cleanly and putting it here, here are all my words, stuttering. The words or the tongue. The words and the tongue. The tongue that is still saying the words. Oh but the mouth it's in that it needs to make the words so the tongue is still in my mouth but we are talking here we are hello we are, as we say, or as they say, the they who is also the we the we who is part of they (oh I sound like Gertrude Stein) putting it out there. Hello my tongue says I am putting myself out there. Stretches itself out onto the plate. Hello.

Attaches back into my mouth. And the hands screw themselves back on the right way onto the right hands and the eyes can be taken out of the glass of water washed like dentures or maybe just contact lenses in sterile solution and go back in their sockets just pop right back in and swivel round looking and I am whole the clothes come back on like the teacup in Hannibal NBC coming back together again in reverse the teacup is put back together like a video in reverse the skin comes back on everything comes

back

on

/////

[crabscrabscrabs]

I feel quite lucky in this crazy AF world.

I was on the Metro today and a kid with his mates carrying on was agressively vaping in front of me and aside from the disgusing sweet smell, the smoke wasn't helping my breathing, unlike me I came so close to asking nicely if he could stop, but he was a proper dodge pot and he worried me. I am so glad I didn't because him and his mates (who kept hitting each other and kicking the train door) as they were getting off, the one vaping pulled out a knife to jokingly threaten his friend. Like wtf man, it's the NE of england and kids are walking around tooled up.