On the topic of Eclipse, I also would love to talk about how he works best off of a reward based system.
After the stern conversation he had with Puppet, Eclipse did go ask Moonlight in a nicer manner about reviewing his killcode. It wasn’t until after Moonlight continued to push the situation that Eclipse almost turned and left.
Moonlight wasn’t in the wrong for trying to push for more polite manners from Eclipse. Asking for things like “please” is literally asking for baseline kindness and respect. The problem is, even doing that is a huge thing for Eclipse. And instead of getting a reward out of what he just did, Moonlight asked even more out of it.
Eclipse is very reward-driven. If he does something, he must get something out of it. If he does something and feels he has gained nothing, then there is no point in doing said thing in the first place. Saying “please” did earn him the right to look at Moonlight’s coding, but that reward felt smothered by the fact that, to Moonlight, please wasn’t enough.
It circles right back to Eclipse feeling like he is enough.
It’s kind of like when you do something you feel is a big achievement, something you were finally able to do after a long time of not being able to, and everyone just saying “cool” and moving on. Eclipse feels like he is putting in the effort and no one is seeing it. Even though what he is doing seem like normal everyday things other people just do, they’re huge strides for Eclipse.
Eclipse is getting better, but his progress is being slowed by the people around him. Funnily enough, even by the same people trying to help him. Part of helping someone through their trauma is learning their reward system. Figure out what they view as praise for their efforts, so you can reward them when they have made progress. It’s part of the process currently being overlooked by the others like Puppet. They want him to get better without showing him how proud they are of his effort.
“Puppet tells Eclipse she’s proud of him all the time!” Yes, but that’s not what Eclipse views as a reward. Words are very easily twisted, they have never been something Eclipse can rely on. He also can’t trust people who say they’re going to stick by his side. People have said that several times and betrayed him anyways. He won’t trust it at this point. He needs something solid.
(This is part of the reason why I think he got so easily attached to Earth. Earth is very big on rewarding people for seemingly small things. She makes the effort to actually understand how he feels about something instead of just calling him “difficult” or “stubborn”. He tells her about things he’s achieved and she is genuinely happy for him and interested in learning more. It’s where most other people fail. They invite Eclipse to do things, but it’s never what Eclipse wants. Moonlight was probably the only other one who tired to show interest in what Eclipse wanted to do before that whole relationship fell apart.)
95 notes
·
View notes
Delicos nursery!?! Fic requests!?! Please please~~
Dino classic marries a plus size woman who at first seems cold but is a total sweetheart and just doesn't understand why people are afraid of her husband? She adores her step son like her own and even call him teddy for short? I love the sunshine x grumpy trope!
There were many things Dino liked about being an aristocrat. Power. The prestige. Being apart of the inner circle of their society.
The one thing he hated about being an aristocrat was the parties.
But, if you wanted to be apart of the inner circle, and get the power & prestige, there were a certain number of social events that were an unspoken mandatory for a man of his station. Particularly one with a new wife, whom he was obligated to introduce to society as such. What a bore.
Luckily, his new wife was much more adept at these kind of things than him. Bright and bubbly, with a family almost grievously overconnected, his new wife took to the party like a fish to water. Talking to everyone and making efforts to re-introduce herself to old friends & new as the current Lady Classico.
Dino entertained himself back in a corner. A position he had grown comfortable with since he was a young man forced onto these parties; until his mother made him come out and talk to people, as he was never going to get married rooted to the ground like a wallflower. He just liked to watch more than participate. He felt it was easier to gauge the situation, gather intel, from the sidelines than in the fray. Plus people being near him always seemed to make his skin crawl.
A while later he noticed his wife coming over to him. A noticeable, deep pout on her lips. One he had never seen; save for the pretend ones she threw at him when she wanted to get her way. This one seemed real though. “What’s the matter?”
“These people are rude.”
This shocked Dino. As he had also never heard his wife speak ill of anyone either. She always seemed to find the good in others. Found the good in him. “How so?”
“They make underhanded comments about you and seem to think I’m too stupid to understand them.” Dino frowned at that. His wife was not stupid. They could say what they wanted about him, some of it probably true, but they would not speak ill of his wife. “Would you…be terribly disappointed if we go? I do not want to make a bad impression, but I also do not think I can screw on a smile much longer?”
Disappointed? Dino thought. He’d jump up an’ click his heels, if only his back would ever forgive him. “Of course. I’ll have our coats and coach sent for.” His wife smiled. Seeming to want to kiss him in her enthusiasm, but remembering they were in public.
Dino instead took her hand in his and kissed her glove where his ring would be. “Could we also take some cakes home for Teddy?” She had taken to calling Theodore that. At first he tried to talk her out of it, but she commented that he was just so cute. Theodore didn’t seem to mind (in fact he seemed to enjoy it judging by his blush) so Dino let it go. “I know you don’t like him to have many sweets but…once in a while can’t hurt. They’ll just throw them away at the end of the night anyway.”
He glanced at the elaborate dessert table. Days of work for the host’s staff. Barely touched. All to go to waste as she predicted. “Take two. The two of you can have them after dinner tomorrow night.” His wife grinned and scurried off to the table to collect her sweets while he called for their coach.
When they arrive home it is late, but not too far gone. His staff greet their new lady and she made quick work to greet them back before running upstairs to try and catch Theodore before bed. He was likely up reading late anyway.
Dino stood there in the foyer, watching her go, before he looked down at the parcel of cakes suddenly in his hands. He opened the lid to see what she had picked and smiled. Not surprised to see 3 slices instead of 2. See, his wife was very clever. She seemed to have no end to surprising him.
68 notes
·
View notes
people often talk about how the trailblazer might struggle to be perceived as human, so instead i give you: dan heng being oblivious to minor aspects of humanity. not so much that it blows his cover, but just enough to unsettle people. this guy is a huge reader, so of course he’ll have a lot of textbook knowledge- it’s always the unspoken, little things that get him.
like, maybe one day, someone he’s friends with admits they can’t swim, and dan heng just. Does Not Understand. he always assumed that swimming was an innate ability for humans, as is the case with the vidyadhara, given that they hatch underwater. he has no reason to believe otherwise until he’s witnessing someone nearly drown within a couple of seconds (as in, the time it takes for the person to start struggling), and that literally keeps him up at night bc Wdym you don’t know how to swim. Why can’t you hold your breath for very long. it eludes him
similarly, i think dan heng would be really surprised to hear that some people fear the ocean. lingsha once said that there’s nothing more nostalgic for the vidyadhara than their homeland ignoring the fact that dan heng never got to experience it for himself, so the fact that anyone could regard it with terror comes as something of a culture shock to him .
i have many thoughts but i always forget about them so perhaps i will post here more often. if i ever figure out how this works
60 notes
·
View notes
I’m absolutely in love with your writing 💕
I’ve always had this scenario of Phillip and Reader (who are both first time parents) going out with their baby, and Reader having to breastfeed the baby in public and a man tries to harass her about it (telling her she shouldn’t be doing this in public and whatnot) and Phillip stands up for her
Maybe the man tries to harass her while Phillip was at the counter getting them something to eat and he hears what’s going on or something?
(Moms who are alone in public get bothered like this irl by men so often and it’d be so sweet to see Phillip standing up for his wife 🥺❤️)
Thank You!!! I hope that you like this as well!
It's weird that people get so bothered by breastfeeding. Like just let the mom feed her baby in peace.
Mind Your Own Business
Phillip Graves x Fem Reader
With the baby turning six weeks old just a few days ago you and Phillip both felt comfortable taking the baby out to more public spaces. It was a beautiful day out, and that of course led to you both walking around the farmer’s market with the little one in tow.
Philip had both hands on the stroller while you had one hand wrapped around the crook of his elbow as you both walked around. It wasn’t until half an hour had passed did he insist on sitting down in one of the bakeries for a bite to eat. “Come on, let me treat my sweetheart to something sweet.”
“I think it’s you who wants something sweet.” You give him a playful nudge as you walk towards the shop.
“Who says it can’t be both?” Phillip counted your accurate remark. “I’m a man capable of many things after all.”
Once in the shop looking at all the available options is when the little one decides to make a fuss. Glancing at the time you know she’s probably just hungry since this is about the time you would normally feed her when at home.
“Oh, are you hungry baby?” You gesture for Phillip to let you take control of the stroller, “I’m going to take her outside and feed her. I saw a shaded bench right outside.”
It’s obvious he doesn’t want to leave you both alone, but understands that that’s just his protective nature talking. That little voice has been speaking a lot more ever since the baby was born. “I’ll be there in just a few minutes; I’ll bring you one of those chocolate croissants I saw you eyeing too.”
"I love you so much." You give him a small kiss, and swiftly make your way outside to the bench just as the baby starts to cry.
It only takes you a few moments to get comfortable, grab the now crying baby out of her stroller, and adjust her so that she can easily breastfeed from you.
You take this time to admire the tiny wiggling bundle of joy in your arms. She truly is the perfect mix between you and Phillip - it almost feels like she’s not real sometimes with just how perfect she is.
The baby's crying and wiggling finally starts to settle down as she latches on. Just as things seem to settle down you feel a sudden presence next to you. Thinking it was Phillip you look up with a smile on your face which quickly shifts into a frown as you take in the strange man now standing in front of you.
It was the look of anger and disgust on his face that had you gripping your daughter tight to you; trying to decide if you needed to get up, and walk away. Before you can make a move though the man is already practically spitting venom at you. “Do you really think that’s appropriate to be doing in public? Why don’t you go do that in the bathroom like you're supposed to do?”
“I’m breastfeeding - I’m just feeding my baby.” Is your immediate response to his unpleasant questions. You knew some people didn’t like it when women breastfeed in public, but you didn’t think anyone would actually try and fight you about it. All you're doing is feeding a baby after all.
“No, what you are doing is purposely exposing yourself to others around you. I mean my god woman could you not have the decency to atleast have a cover on?”
“A cover? It’s 80 degrees out right now, and you want me to practically put a blanket over her?” You couldn’t believe what you were hearing right now. Not to mention that you didn’t like using a cover; all it felt like was another thing you had to pack around and worry about.
Arguing only seemed to be making the man more upset with you. As if you should be thankful that he was gifting you with his “amazing” advice on how and where you should be breastfeeding your baby.
Red faced with a pointed finger raised, the man takes a large step closer to you. It genuinely seemed like he would have come even closer if he wasn’t so suddenly jerked away from you.
“Now what do you think you're doing here bothering my wife and child?” There Phillip stood now in between the man and you. Finally, it felt like you could breathe again knowing that your husband was here to help you.
Phillip was furious - that much was obvious even from where you sat with his back to you. His shoulders were tense, and his clenched fists looked like they were one wrong move from throwing a punch.
“That’s your wife?” The man waves in your direction, “How about you tell your wife to cover up while in public.”
The silence that follows after those words are deafening.
“Phillip,” You softly call out to your husband. As much as you would love to let him do whatever he sees fit you’d rather not have to be escorted off by police.
You watch as Phillip slowly releases a sigh before he continues with his words to the man, “I'm not going to waste any more breath explaining just how stupid you sound right now. What I am going to say though is that if you don't walk away right now I'm going to beat the shit out of you, and I promise you that is a fight you don't want - not with me."
The man clearly wasn't prepared for the outright threat of violence against him, and it showed on his now shocked face. People like him are all talk; just wanting to pick on someone seemingly weaker than him, and the second someone stronger stands up to him he's playing the victim.
"Whatever," the man growls out before hastily turning on his heels and walking away further into the market.
Phillip doesn't move from his position until the man has completely disappeared from view. When he does eventually turn around he puts one hand on your check and the other one cradles the baby's head before he asks you, "are you both alright?"
"We're- we're alright. He didn't do anything besides give me a lecture." You're so thankful for that too, and luckily your daughter didn't seem to notice the tense situation that just occurred. "How did you know he was even here?"
"You really didn't think I wouldn't be watching you while I was waiting inside did you?" Phillip looked much calmer now that it was just the three of you again. "Which reminds me I still need to pick our order up. Now let me help you pack up; there's no way I'm leaving you alone to get harassed again."
Normally you would have insisted that you were alright to stay where you were, but right now all you wanted was to stay by his side. This encounter has really rattled you more than you thought.
It only takes Phillip a few seconds to get everything back in the baby bag. The baby is still feeding from you as you both walk back to the bakery. In the silence you can’t help, but ask a question that has been bothering you. “Do you think I should … hide away when I need to breastfeed in public?"
"Sweetheart, don't let one dumb fucker stop you from feeding our baby when she's hungry. You have the right to breastfeed anywhere you damn want to."
"You're right, you're right," He was right, this one experience shouldn't stop you from going out and enjoying things with your baby.
Phillip reached out and gave you a quick peck as he opened the bakery door, "besides I'll always be there to defend my girls."
56 notes
·
View notes
ok ok so I was just going to draw long haired Sayori but then I came up with a bunch of elementaryish aged designs and now I came up with a bunch of headcanons and more sketches so woohoo lots or text under cut open for more headcanons (also idk why tumblr made the image change quality that is not the same colour or quality I had it in)
Yknow for some reason I just can’t imagine Natsuki being like a happy kid in the past like at all. I think it’s like a “kid who obviously has a bad home life and acts out because of it but nobody’s gonna to actually try to do anything about it so they just put her in detention” kinda vibe. I don’t think anyone outright hates her since she probably would have brought it up in base game/side stories, but she isn’t exactly a beloved member of the school either
In the side stories she talks about being very different in the past and specifically going through a really edgy ‘I hate everyone phase’ in middle school. This isn’t a middle school headcanon but I feel like her being kinda bitter before the total edgy phase makes sense.
I think in contrast to her having a super defined sense of self present day, Natsuki here was a lot more identityless and unsure about what she wants. She gets really into cutesy stuff in the future but here she leans a lot more into the angry side of her because she doesn’t really understand a lot of what she’s feeling. It’s why I didn’t really give her a unique hairstyle, if she had something she’d actually like I don’t think she would have changed it to the pigtails
Also her clothes are kinda bad and has a hole in her sleeve since she doesn’t really get a lot of clothes due to obligatory ~home life angst~ but this post isn’t about that so
She gets into manga pretty early but just kinda enjoys it casually on a surface level thing. She drops it for a bit before picking it back up, and suddenly understanding what plot and themes are lead to her going insane about it until present day.
She’s into skating because I said so
It also makes a great explanation for why she gets a broken arm and why she always has a bunch of bandaids :))))))))
Ok I might also just like giving character designs bandaids
Tbh I forgot if they said Natsuki’s friends met in middle school or not but I think it still applies since they probably knew her through every cringe phase she had (including the fanfics). But either way they were probably one of the few people to actually give Natsuki a chance which is part of why she puts up with their bullying so much. Throughout every phase she might have had they made fun of her every step of the way, to the point she’s just kinda used to it now. Doesn’t help that she thinks her old self was cringe, so by present day she just assumes she deserves whatever bullying she gets from them. Girl needs to have compassion for her past self. And present self tbh
While Natsuki was cringe in the ‘I hate everything’ way, Yuri was cringe in the ‘I am a massive nerd for cringe pieces of media and am going to make everyone aware of that fact’. At least that’s how they see themselves now
She’s a lot more open to talking about her interests. She can and will yap to random people with little to no prompting because she hasn’t really learned yet that people would be put off by it
She’s not overly social but more willing to chat with others with a polite and friendly attitude. She hasn’t been hurt yet so she is filled with joy and whimsy and is overall more cheerful compared to present day
She has her hair like that so I could give the vibe of ‘cheerfully annoying and/or adorable☝️🤓’ nerd archetype instead of ‘would rather become a speck of dust than talk to a person’ nerd archetype. Her hair is generally more dishevelled to show she’s more naive and less elitist I guess. She also isn’t as good at taking care of her hair yet so it looks kinda bad in a charming way(her school would not agree)
Her bangs being up with the headband shows her being more open and willing to be vulnerable to others in a way that’s lost in present day, where her long bangs hide a lot of her face in that one sprite. Her forehead is a metaphor 😭
I don’t really have parent headcanons but the cardigan is from her mom. I just think it’s cute
Random headcanons idrk where else to put but since that one act 2 sprite just borrows the teeth from Natsuki I like to think her teeth is also weirdly sharp it just doesn’t stick out as much. People think her teeth are creepy though so she tries not to smile with her teeth. She doesn’t care to smile like that anyways since she doesn’t really know how to in pictures (me projecting) and her natural smiles are a lot more subtle/don’t show teeth so it’s all fine.
Stating the obvious here but she was totally outcasted by like most of her school. Most people thought she was weird and her enthusiasm off-putting so they’d try avoiding her. She doesn’t really know why they think she’s off-putting though, people just start avoiding her for no reason. A few would go out of their way to bully her too, which ont added fuel to the iscolation fire, which ended up give her massive vulnerability and self esteem issues. Shocker ik. It takes a while to fully break her down from here to her high school self but it does mess her up a lot even then. At this specific point in time though she stills has her innocence so dw it’s fineeeeeee
Her anxiety issues are also there but she still has enough of a positive attitude to go ‘hey this sucks but maybe this time talking about my interests will work and they’ll actually like me!’ even if it didn’t work the last time. She doesn’t really know how else to talk to people so she keeps trying the same thing hoping maybe this time it’ll work out.
Uh.
things get worse. you probably know that
Sayori still the sillyyyyy
But tbh she probably changes the least compared to present day. I mean she gets more mature and less starry eyed but her mask is basically the same as her kid self. I don’t have as much to say on that specifically cause compared to the rest she doesn’t change that much
Yeah Understanding said she used to have long hair but cut it since she couldn’t really take care of it. I feel like even before the depression got worse she sucked at taking care of it because she has the self proclaimed attention span of a donut. Her hair is really scruffy and if you tried to comb it would probably hurt a lot. So she doesn’t ever
Her and mc are still the the goofy-goober and straight man dynamic they have in base game. Sayori drags mc into some shenanigans and mc tries to help her get out of trouble. He also has less of an ‘I don’t want to be seen with this cringe’ attitude he has a bit of in the base game since he isn’t as concerned with reputation because he’s like 7, so he’s more open with being directly nice to her. He acts a lot more genuinely with their friendship overall compared present day where he finds it a lot harder to earnestly share his appreciation of Sayori as a cool sigma male
A lot of their banter is light hearted, but Sayori doesn’t start interpreting his teasing for actual criticism of her character until a little later into their relationship. His jokes probably hurt more in hindsight when they do end up drifting apart because his lighthearted jokes stated feeling more real.
It’s sorta implied in side stories that there was a point where everyone found out about her depression and was worried constantly about her. It probably was from an old friend group considering nobody else seems to know about it, but I feel like mc drifted apart before that considering he doesn’t know. I think they became friends again by sides stories, but considering he doesn’t act like he’s as concerned for her well-being as he is by the end of act one, he probably wasn’t there when everyone else found out and therefore doesn’t know about the depression here either. Idk though side stories have different continuity apparently so who knows maybe that never happened or maybe he’s just stupid
Yeah of course she still has depression here. It probably got worse over time though since I feel like her constant silly oblivious persona would have came from somewhere. She is naturally pretty upbeat, it’s just that she had to lie more over time in order to keep that idea going. Now she feels like that old her is basically dead, with her just masquerading as someone who isn’t there anymore.
She’s like the only one here who has a positive opinion of her past self, to the point where she actively wants to go back and be that person. In a way she still is that little kid, but at the same time things can never go back to how they were. Uh yeah but she still hates herself so I guess no one gets to reap the rewards of caring for their past self.
She also trips constantly. I don’t think it’s that surprising
Since Monika has the least specific info on her past I got to be a bit silly about it and make up as much as I wanted.
She is like completely different from her present self. Similar to Natsuki she’s also sorta identityless but in a weird quiet gifted kid sorta way instead of an angry lost child sorta way.
She’s pretty quiet and doesn’t talk much. With a pretty expressionless face and more deadpan voice she kinda gives creepy horror movie child vibes but the type of child that appears before the horror actually starts (which is to say not actually scary but just kinda weird) (I just realized a lot of this is just me projecting what I was like as a kid but with less prep energy)
Yeah she’s extroverted but at this point she doesn’t really seek out people until she starts actively trying to boost her image
She doesn’t really have many hobbies outside of being a teacher pet and if it weren’t for her stellar grades she totally would of been bullied, but she’s nice enough to help people study so she’s safe
She isn’t really the most popular in school until high school. She does start out as the token prodigy gifted kid so everyone expected her to excel in everything so on a whim she’s like ‘ok guess I’m doing everything now’ and it’s totally not going to alter the course of her life forever
She likes the validation and wants to live up to the expectations so she starts leaning super hard into the perfect image. She gradually starts joining clubs, getting cool achievements, studying for those straight A+ grades, talking to people and networking, and overall changing her image from quiet kid to strong confidence friendly student who’s going to go far. Awesome
She kinda had to train herself to not be weird creepy child and would practice smiling, facial expressions, being more sociable, talking less deadpan, etc. She has a lot of “fake it till you make it” vibes in the side stories to the point I don’t think she even realizes she’s doing it. I imagine her going from weird little kid to most popular high schooler around was like wearing the mask until it became the real thing.
Tbh this whole design started because I really like the headcanon design of her bangs covering her eyes. And then I gave her a stripped shirt because it felt generic but also not boring but it ended up making her look like one of the seven human souls lol
Honestly if I could describe her vibe here in one sentence it would be utdr protagonist but like in prep school
ok that’s it idrk how to end this but thanks for watching hit the like and subscribe and
20 notes
·
View notes
i’m still 114lbs. i feel sick. yesterday was an awful day, i came home and had an out of body chew and spit session. i wish there was more research on this part of ed’s, or just more people who talked about it because i can’t be alone in this. i refuse to believe i’m the only sick person who does disgusting shit like this. anyways the reason why i call it an out of body experience is because it’s almost like binging-just without all the swallowing of food. i came home and immediately started doing it and filled up 1 and 1/2 2 liter bottles with food. i spent 5 hours doing this without even realizing and pretty much emptied out my whole families fridge. the guilt i felt afterwards was worse than a binge in my opinion. not only did i totally waste SO MUCH food, make a huge mess, ended up with disgusting bottles of mush in my room, i also have to face the consequences of my family coming home to an empty fridge. but when they got home they were happy that i “ate.” god i’m such a fucking piece of shit.
anyways after all that i took 4 laxatives to try and get the guilt of wasting the food out of me. i woke up in the morning today in terrible pain but still had to go to class, cuz what am i supposed to tell my parents? “yeah i haven’t eaten in almost a month and basically just threw all the food we have out in the trash and i also took 4 laxatives, can i please stay home tehe?” so i went to 1 class and ended up leaving because the pain was so excruciating. straight from class i went to the gym and somehow burnt 900 calories because i guess that’s what guilt does to me. i had to take the bus 2 hours home afterwards(bus delays and i went to a new further gym location this time), high out of my mind. i’m home now and my stomach hurts but the laxatives finally did their job. i don’t want to keep doing this. 4 years ago i said i’d recover and then i didn’t. since then i’ve forgotten about recovery (with the exception of a few random moments here and there that i block out immediately), i am so used to living in this fucking misery that i didn’t realize how abnormal my reality is. i don’t want to be a bad person anymore. but i can’t stop lol.
this is what bothers me about the girls who romanticize this disorder SO MUCH, when much of the time they haven’t realized how difficult it can become. i know i’ve done this, even now sometimes as a coping mechanism. but man, i’m sick of it.
i have a friend who writes poetry and she wrote a poem about eating disorders that make me so fucking angry. the thing is, i’ve known her for years and she’s always had the best relationship with food out of most of the people i know. she’s naturally pretty thin(not too thin but normal) and she’s very open about her struggles. i know every single one of her stories, i know she’s diagnosed with adhd. that’s HER disorder, that i don’t understand so i DONT write fucking POETRY about it. a few months ago she kind of forced me into opening up about my eating disorder. after i did, suddenly she started writing these stories about her eating disorder-very very very suspiciously similar to mine. i obviously didn’t tell her everything but i told her about how long this has been going on and just my emotions about it. seeing her start to adapt my fucking disorder into her poetry disgusted me. she glamorized the fuck out of it and made me feel so stupid for ever opening up about it. she’s naturally skinny so she got a bunch of support from our friend group from it and i’m just upset man. i’m sick of living in misery while other people can use the idea of living in pain for attention.
i promised my best friend that in 3 weeks i’ll go back to therapy and try my best to recover. it’s not true. man it’s never fucking true. it’s never fucking over. unlike ms.deep-poetry-girl i can’t just fucking write this and log off and then eat a good warm meal and talk to my parents without them mentioning my body. i can’t wake up tomorrow morning and hug them without worrying that they’re gonna feel my bones. i can’t wear shorts anymore without people noticing the bruises. i can’t go to school and keep my focus because i have nothing to feed my brain. i can’t let anyone get close because soon enough they’ll be just like YOU. OR they’ll hate me for not wanting to get better. i can’t love myself like you do because of the disgusting things i do each day. i can’t wake up thinner and suddenly stop hating myself. FUCK YOUUUUUUUU GOD IM SO SICK OF IT GOD. whatever im done. just sick and tired.
42 notes
·
View notes
absolutely hilarious to me that that side of the fandom think the buddie side is the delusional one because of the tim interview when the man himself CLEARLY stated that he had NEVER seen the fandom behaving this badly in all of his years working in the business and the only difference from all the other years to this one is the bt fandom, like genuinely lol.
he also stated about people coming to talk to him and using what he said when there are prints out there of their fandom doing this, like it’s not all of them obviously, just like there are parts of the buddie fandom who can be disrespectful too, but as someone who recently joined the fandom and saw the comings and goings through the years, i can safely say when a fandom is being too much on the disrespectful side and i saw that behavior way more on that side, honestly.
39 notes
·
View notes
On a scale of one to ten how emotional was readers reaction seeing megumi alive again
8.7 but she never really believed that he was gone. call her crazy but her son isn’t going to blindly submit to some manic gym bro from the heian era
megumi takes back his body and she’s basically jumping up and down with yuji and applauding. a standing ovation for her son, obviously.
and then later she goes home and cries herself to sleep because a. she’s really proud of him and b. the world is a terrible terrible place
21 notes
·
View notes
It’s so embarrassing and heartbreaking being in so much pain over losing someone while knowing they don’t give a fuck if you live or die. Your favorite person becoming a stranger is a special kind of hell.
27 notes
·
View notes
Ben Solo is baby (honk honk), Daenerys Targaryen is the rightful queen of Westeros, Anders was right (bombing the Catholic Church is always morally correct), and Eridan has never done a single thing wrong thing in his life.
9 notes
·
View notes
Whumpers, what are your earliest memories?
Mine is from when I was about two or three. I was in a stroller, at my cousin’s Irish dancing recital. After the recital, my aunts were talking down to me in the stroller, and to each other. I was experiencing extreme anxiety because I couldn’t understand what they were saying, when I felt I should have been able to communicate with them like they were communicating with each other. I was also very tired and dazed. I did not cry though… I probably looked normal on the outside.
I also remember when I was about four or five, I went to the beach with my dad and one of his friends. I somehow found my way onto the dock, planted my little rear end on a jet ski, untethered it from the dock, and started floating into the sunset. There was an old lady lounging in a donut inflatable out some way; she said something to me, but I couldn’t understand what she said, despite trying really hard. I’m assuming it was something along the lines of “Oh my god get off that jet ski you’re going to fucking DIE, kid,” but again… couldn’t understand a word of what she said, and got frustrated because she was speaking English (without an accent) and I should know how to understand adults speaking English to me.
At this point, my dad is yelling at me from across the water, and a young lifeguard drags the jet ski back. On land, my dad lectured at me very harshly as he led me back to the car. I didn’t know I had done anything wrong, and was very confused. At some point this guy starts quoting the Bible at me, and the only thing I could pick out were the words (spoken very emphatically), “Your days are numbered.”
“My days are numbered?” cue a vivid mental image of a calendar, with dates listed for every day of the week, “What does that mean?” Later on I figured out this was the Bible’s way of referencing death at God’s hand which just made me even more confused as to what I did, until at age thirteen, I figured out, “Oh a baby who can’t swim floating on a jet ski is terrifying, actually.”
Tagging: @kaleidoscopr @redd956 @hereissomething @astudyinpanda @c0ldbrains @straight-to-the-pain
13 notes
·
View notes
doing really bad in ways i can’t talk about which is making it worse
10 notes
·
View notes
I’m gonna be real some of you guys gotta stop defining your experience online by what you hate and start defining it by what makes you happy
8 notes
·
View notes
Me when I want to be wanted more than anything else
2 notes
·
View notes
@ the aroace community
Girl help. How do we survive?
4 notes
·
View notes
Idk why people get sooo mad when a word applies to something they think it doesn’t. Like. I’m diagnosed as being mildly intellectually disabled (because I am severely dyspraxic), it is medically and legally in black and white and there is Thorough ass paperwork that goes into detail as to how. (I won’t get too specific here but I’m categorized as “severely impaired” in the areas of motor speed and coordination, rapid mental flexibility, and spatial perception and orientation.)
Quantitatively and qualitatively doctors have tested and retested to figure out that objectively i fit the criteria, and therefore am officially categorized as such. That’s not a political statement or something I *want* to be true or false, it’s just fact. Not as in my ✨lived experience✨ but as in science. There’s not a secret other definition that doesn’t apply to me, just because an acquaintance is uncomfortable with it for whatever reason. You don’t know more about intellectual disability than neurologists do just because you have a tumblr account
4 notes
·
View notes