#Good communication

[tofu-bento-box]

// serious post

here’s the thing i don’t get: people tell you to communicate your feelings, and then react negatively when you feel something they don’t think you should.

i’m ill in six different directions: my feelings are mostly negative and generally illogical. i get upset for reasons that i know don’t matter in the bigger scheme of things. but i can’t express that anger or hurt, because then people think that i am selfish, and entitled, and a bad friend. on the other hand, though, i’m also bad at hiding my feelings, and saying you’re okay when you clearly aren’t is also rude. so it’s just a constant struggle between “how much can i say to make this person feel that i’m answering truthfully, without them deciding i’m a selfish asshole.”

people tell me that you can’t rationalize away your emotions, and then react with disgust when i can’t do that for “the things that matter.” i’m upset. i know i shouldn’t be, i’m upset that i’m upset, but you sitting there judging me isn’t exactly going to help the situation. i know that whatever’s going on with my friends is more important than how it affects me. but then what does selflessness look like? is it not being upset in the first place, or is it just hiding your expression of your hurt? am i incapable of being a good friend because i can’t keep myself from feeling things i shouldn’t?

i just don’t get people sometimes. it’s like everyone has a rulebook for what’s allowed, and they just forgot to give me a copy. i get told communicate, communicate, communicate, over and over, and everyone forgets to mention what i’m meant to be conveying. because sometimes it really seems that what they want isn’t the truth.

[fernlessbastard]

talking about mentally ill tnt duo

them learning to use safe words outside of sex or dynamic stuff, to have an alternative way of communicating during episodes

actually that's a very important thing: everyone, establish a system of "safewords" with the safe people in your life.

Words, phrases, emojis, tapping, squeezing, etc - create a system that allows you to discreetely communicate. examples of what it can be used for: * reassuring/getting reassurance (when for whatever reason you can't express it verbally) * communicating that a joke has gone too far, * asking for help with getting out of an uncomfortable situation (for example a social event), * making sure something you're saying is genuine and honest - it's important especially when you both have issues (don't abuse the phrase by asking about trivial things) but when you need to make absolute sure that what's being said is fully true it's very useful to have a little safe word that you know neither person is going to break. this comes in handy with things like checking if someone's safe, or when you need reassurance that they definitely care about you * communicating that you're not feeling safe (great to have with parents/parental figures in your life/someone reliable with a car for when you need them to come get you from somewhere) * communicating that you need to say something and be heard out, and that you don't wanna attack them, but this is an issue that you have to work through *communicating that you need space - or the opposite

There's reasons ways to use safewords in that manner, but i'd say it's very important to develop some kind of a system like that with close friends/partner(s)/parental figures etc

aaand of course yes absolutely great hc fully support that (lmao i got a little off-topic)

[enderfics]

Kissing Spider-Man was incredible. Wade had done it a thousand times by now. They would meet in the late hours of the night and push each other against the wall of a dark alley. Frantically, Wade would pull Spider-Man’s mask to his nose and lean in. Kissing Spider-Man had become his favourite part of the night. 

He was familiar with it now. 

Deadpool could describe exactly how Spider-Man held onto his hips as their lips danced. He could tell you all about the little sigh Webs did when they broke for air and he could tell you every detail about the hero’s shameful walk out of the alley. 

He was so familiar with kissing Spider-Man. 

So, when Wade didn’t feel the hero’s hand on his hips, gently squeezing, he only felt slightly uneasy. Granted, Wade felt worse when the hero stood slack, his weight pushed against the wall instead of onto Wade. Something was wrong. 

Gently, he leaned away from the hero, creating a space between them and coughed, awkwardly. Spider-Man fidgeted with his hands.

“What’s wrong?” Spider-Man’s voice was quiet. He reached out to pull the merc closer but huffed angrily when Wade stood firmly away. If Deadpool wasn’t so concerned, he would have laughed. Sighing instead, he asked, “What’s wrong with you?” Wade could only see half of the arachnid’s face but watched as a large frown formed. Okay, so something major was wrong. 

“Deadpool…” Spider-Man’s voice was breathless and embarrassed. Whatever was about to be said, was serious. Wade had the sudden urge to run and flee, whicht was overwhelming. He would never forgive himself if he abandoned Spider-Man like this. Instead Wade convinced his stupid mind to shut up and focus on the trembling man in front of him. Why the fuck was Webs trembling?

“Are you cold?”

“What?” Spider-Man chuckled, shaking his head no. Wade quickly pointed out how much the spider was shivering and frowned when after realising it was a product of the man’s ever-unforgiving anxiety. 

Wade repeated the question and the hero’s mask wrinkled as he scrunched his face. Spider-Man reached forward, grasping Wade’s hand gently. He sighed, heavily, like he was preparing himself to say something awful. 

He was. 

“Deadpool…” Spider-Man’s voice was just as quiet as before “What are we?”

This had shocked the merc. What were they? Something, that was for sure, but no label felt like it fit them. Webs sat with him whilst his body regenerated and squeezed Wade’s hand as a reminder that everything would be okay. Wade had sat on countless rooftops watching Spider-Man from a distance, ready to jump in and save him as soon as it was needed. And of course, they kissed. They had made out so, so much. And Wade had figured that they were something. He was just never one for labels. 

Spider-Man was staring up at him. His white lenses reflected the moonlight as he gazed up towards Wade. Shit. Webs wanted to label this. Shit. Wade chuckled, nervously, and averted his eyes. “What are we?” Spider-Man repeated his question, voice firmer this time. 

When Deadpool hadn’t responded, the smaller man continued, “Because someone asked me out today. And I rejected them.” His voice was slowly turning bitter and angry. “I feel like I should be loyal to you, that I can’t be casual with other people because of you,” He took a sharp inhale, “And it sucks, Deadpool. Because I don’t know what we are.” 

“I don’t do labels Webs,” 

“So, are you rejecting me?” 

Instead of answering, Wade leant down and caught Spider-Man’s lips in a gentle kiss. He wanted to scream that, no he wasn’t rejecting the man. Labels were just scary and Wade didn’t want to screw this up. He wanted to shout about how perfect their dynamic was without the existence of labels and he hoped the kiss portrayed that. 

When they broke apart, Webs’s expression hadn’t changed. He repeated his question, again. 

“Do you want us to be a thing?” His voice was still sour.

“Yes.”

“Ask me out.”

Wade whined. He had only ever seen half of the other man’s face and didn’t even know the hero’s name. Their relationship was so private and it thrived off of the lack of intimacy. They didn’t need to know about each other's personal lives. The mystery was important. It was part of their banter. Plus, Wade didn’t think he wouldn't be a good match for the hero; Their morals were too different and their relationship would have too many conflicts. 

But the idea of seeing Spider-Man with someone else hurt. It struck Wade right in the heart and made it difficult to breathe. Suddenly, he felt selfish and wanted to keep Webs for himself. Wade wanted to hide Spider-Man’s soft laugh and heavy sighs away from the world. They were his and his only. 

“Deadpo-“

“Wade.” His chest felt tight. “If we’re going to be exclusive, we should at least know each other's names.” Wade took a large step away from the hero and stuck out a gloved hand. “Wade.” He repeated, confidence seeping into his voice. Spider-Man laughed, his classic laugh which caused Wade to smile. 

“Are we going to be exclusive?” The question was easy to answer. The idea of webs being with someone else - kissing someone else - made him want to scream. So Wade nodded. Yes.

Slowly, Spider-Man shook his hand. 

“Peter. Parker.” 

Wade leaned in again and kissed Peter. This felt right. This felt so right. The kiss was softer this time, gentle and romantic. It was new. This time, Peter broke the kiss by pushing his weight back into the wall.  “Can you ask me out now, Wade?”

[emperornorton47]

[flower1622]

I don't really ship pernico, but I don't think who ships Percy and Nico is a pedo.... (that word). There are lot of people and characters that date others much older than them. Both could get to know each other for a few years as friends. Then, I don't know...when Nico gets older, they could start dating, I don't see any problem. Love is love. Let's not forget that Nico would be an old man still stuck in a kid's body. Going by this logic, it would be a bad thing for him to date Will or anyone else, just like Edward with Bella and many other characters. I still prefer a ship that both partners wouldn't make fun of each other than another that a partner does make fun of the other. In a relationship is necessary a good communication or at least respect from both parts.

[coffeedrinkeryeg]

ty for the response however I’d like to specify that my ler is a switch and when we first started talking he would tease me a lot but now he mostly asks for me to tease him about tickling him and so on. It’s just that now when he teases me he cuts it short and hints for me to do it to him it’s not that I really mind it’s just that it’s been going on for so long that he basically just stopped teasing me and he started treating me like a ler. So idk what to do bc when he called me that it kinda stings and I don’t wanna hurt his feelings. Sorry for venting I just don’t really know who to talk to about this.

Well it's SUPER sweet that you feel comfortable enough to talk with me about this, whomever you are. Just DM me okay? I'll give you my pieces of advice.

For everyone else. Switches, Lee's, Ler's. Please don't feel embarrassed or obligated to do something for your respective lee or ler. You aren't obligated to tease or get teased. The interaction happens because you two have a connection, and it's very tough for people to maintain the highest quality of connection all the time. People are malleable, they change their minds often, they can't focus on one task forever, we get tired. But no matter what, if your lee or ler is feeling distant, just talk to them like a person first. Ask how they are, and what's going on with them, it takes 10 seconds and can make someone's entire day. Build that connection with your tickle friend and prioritize treating them like a friend, not a vessel to satisfy your tickling needs.

[arialerendeair]

THE PRINCESS BRIDE SCENE IS HERE AT LAST!!!

[allo-frouto]

Hahahaha agreed! What matters is how you use it, but i just thought i’d tease you with my special number lol. Have a nice day!

You too!

[christadeguchi]

MONKEY MAN (2024)

[luxwing]

Congrats to the TF2 community for finally getting a cosmetic into the game with the trans pride flag hidden on it. About damn time

[ilona-mushroom]

Not socialist in a “I won’t have to work” type of way but socialist in a “I’ll still be working but I won’t be worried I won’t make the rent” type of way. In a “billions won’t be hoarded by one person” type of way. In a “janitors, fast-food workers, child care workers, preschool teachers, hotel clerks, personal care and home health aides, and grocery store cashiers, will live comfortably” type of way. In a “the sick and elderly will be cared for” type of way. In a “no child should work” type of way.

[frankierotwinkdeath]

Y’all want Taylor Swift to be gay so bad but you won’t even write femslash about her

[plaguedoctorate]

idk man. i just think itd be really cool if sign language classes were mandatory throughout primary school. yeah because it would make communication with deaf kids and autistic/nonverbal kids much easier. and those kids would be accessible to the others so they could make friends and have healthy relationships. yeah. and kids would eat that shit up man. like their own little secret language? they love that.

[a-gay-poptart]

I have found the best ally

Straight and cis people will say that they are allies, but you will NEVER measure up to my dentist.

Me: "Hey, is it ok if I can change my name on my info from [DEADNAME] to Aspen?"

Random woman that I wasn't even talking to in the chair next to me: "Honey, if that's the name you had at birth, [DEADNAME] is your only name."

My dentist, very slowly turning her rolley chair towards the woman: "Shush."

Random woman: "Excuse me?"

Destist: *closes privacy curtain while staring bullets at the lady*

Me: *pissing myself laughing*

My dentist while changing my name in my info (reminder that English is not her first language, she immigrated from Russia): "There, Sai, you have pretty boy teeth. Smile and make all girls swoon."

Me not having the heart to tell her I'm not transmasc but I'm Agender, and still pissing myself laughing: "Thank you [DENTIST NAME]."

Edit: Ok, this has gotten alot of attention, but right now my other posts is what really needs attention. I have a few fundraisers for people trying to evacuate Palestine and Gaza, but also a diabetic who needs her insulin shot. Please please please, go to my page and at the very least repost those posts, have the day you deserve and free Palestine🇵🇸

[1zumbacom]

Finish Your Food!

Exercise is one of the best methods to calm down! 😉 When a parent force his kid to finish everything in his plate, this counts as a “No No” doing. Saying this is important since the child could be hurt physically and mentally. Every decision you take as a parent is a big one bc it involves another human being “your kid”. Then, what should you do? How can you do this? Here’s a number of solutions…

[shaylene-the-praline]

gif version ✨️❤️