#Technically. I mean. They were prescribed to me.

[writers-potion]

Writing Character Accents in Fiction

Hey there, thanks for the question! I speak English as a second language; most English speakers I encounter aren’t native (yes, including fictional people); thus, this is a concern I’ve explored personally when I write. 

I think the core principle regarding accent writing is this: it shouldn’t be distracting. 

For the same reasons why Stephen King prescribes the basic dialogue tag “said” rather than fancier alternatives like “whispered”, “shouted” or “screeched”, dialogue must be first and foremost easy to read. It must flow like a real conversation – the pace and tone are a lot more important than how specific words are being pronounced by the character. 

Focus on what effect the accent has:

Using adjectives to describe their voice in general. Different types of English (American, British, Australian, etc.) will give off a different vibe, also partly dependent on how your character speaks in general:

Lilting: Having a smooth rise and falling quality; sing-song like. Welsh accent is often described as singing. 

Posh: from a high social class. This is the term generally used to describe the upper-class British accent.

Nasal: this happens when the sound goes through somebody’s nose when they’re speaking. North American accents are more nasal than, say, British pronunciations. 

Brash: harsh, loud, indicative of sounding a little rude. 

Slur: speaking indistinctly; words merging into one another.

Using metaphors.

Her voice was cotton and fluffy clouds. 

When he spoke, the ‘r’s scratched the insides of his throat. 

Mentioning their accent with a brief example(s). 

“Would you like to drink some wine?” she said, though her Indian accent gave extra vibration to her ‘w’s and ‘r’s, making the words sound more like ‘vould you like to drrrink some vine’.

“I want some chocolate.” His syllables were choppy and ‘l’s rather flat, saying ‘cho-ko-lit’. 

Some Tips:

Don’t phonically spell out everything. Perhaps give a few examples in the beginning, but stick to standard English spellings. 

Pay attention to word choice, slang, and colloquialisms. 

An Australian person would say “tram”, not “trolley; “runners” instead of “sneakers”

A Canadian may refer to a “fire hall” – what Americans call a firehouse or fire station

If your character comes from a non-Enligsh background:

Use vocabulary from other languages. 

“What time was the exam, ah? Two o’clock? Jiayou!” → putting “ah” or “la” at the end of sentences + Jiayou means “break a leg” in Singlish. 

“I can’t believe that 4-year-olds have their own SNS accounts now.” → “SNS” is short for “social networking service”, a term used to refer to social media in Korea. This would a subtle difference – even though it isn’t technically Korean at all!

Transpose grammar from different languages. 

For example, in French, plural nouns take plural adjectives (whereas in English, you would speak of ‘white cars’, not ‘whites cars’).

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[inkskinned]

so one of the things that's so horrifying about birth control is that you have to, like, navigate this incredibly personal choice about your body and yet also face the epitome of misogyny. like, someone in the comments will say it wasn't that bad for me, and you'll be utterly silenced. like, everyone treats birth control like something that's super dirty. like, you have no fucking information or control over this thing because certain powerful people find it icky.

first it was the oral contraceptives. you went on those young, mostly for reasons unrelated to birth control - even your dermatologist suggested them to control your acne. the list of side effects was longer than your arm, and you just stared at it, horrified.

it made you so mentally ill, but you just heard that this was adulthood. that, yes, there are of course side effects, what did you expect. one day you looked up yasmin makes me depressed because surely this was far too intense, and you discovered that over 12,000 lawsuits had been successfully filed against the brand. it remains commonly prescribed on the open market. you switched brands a few times before oral contraceptives stopped being in any way effective. your doctor just, like, shrugged and said you could try a different brand again.

and the thing is that you're a feminist. you know from your own experience that birth control can be lifesaving, and that even when used for birth control - it is necessary healthcare. you have seen it save so many people from such bad situations, yourself included. it is critical that any person has access to birth control, and you would never suggest that we just get rid of all of it.

you were a little skeeved out by the implant (heard too many bad stories about it) and figured - okay, iud. it was some of the worst pain you've ever fucking experienced, and you did it with a small number of tylenol in your system (3), like you were getting your bikini line waxed instead of something practically sewn into your body.

and what's wild is that because sometimes it isn't a painful insertion process, it is vanishingly rare to find a doctor that will actually numb the area. while your doctor was talking to you about which brand to choose, you were thinking about the other ways you've been injured in your life. you thought about how you had a suspicious mole frozen off - something so small and easy - and how they'd numbed a huge area. you thought about when you broke your wrist and didn't actually notice, because you'd thought it was a sprain.

your understanding of pain is that how the human body responds to injury doesn't always relate to the actual pain tolerance of the person - it's more about how lucky that person is physically. maybe they broke it in a perfect way. maybe they happened to get hurt in a place without a lot of nerve endings. some people can handle a broken femur but crumble under a sore tooth. there's no true way to predict how "much" something actually hurts.

in no other situation would it be appropriate for doctors to ignore pain. just because someone can break their wrist and not feel it doesn't mean no one should receive pain meds for a broken wrist. it just means that particular person was lucky about it. it should not define treatment.

in the comments of videos about IUDs, literally thousands of people report agony. blinding, nauseating, soul-crushing agony. they say things like i had 2 kids and this was the worst thing i ever experienced or i literally have a tattoo on my ribs and it felt like a tickle. this thing almost killed me or would rather run into traffic than ever feel that again.

so it's either true that every single person who reports severe pain is exaggerating. or it's true that it's far more likely you will experience pain, rather than "just a pinch." and yet - there's nothing fucking been done about it. it kind of feels like a shrug is layered on top of everything - since technically it's elective, isn't it kind of your fault for agreeing to select it? stop being fearmongering. stop being defensive.

you fucking needed yours. you are almost weirdly protective of it. yours was so important for your physical and mental health. it helped you off hormonal birth control and even started helping some of your symptoms. it still fucking hurt for no fucking reason.

once while recovering from surgery, they offered you like 15 days of vicodin. you only took 2 of them. you've been offered oxy for tonsillitis. you turned down opioids while recovering from your wisdom tooth extraction. everything else has the option. you fucking drove yourself home after it, shocked and quietly weeping, feeling like something very bad had just happened. the nurse that held your hand during the experience looked down at you, tears in her eyes, and said - i know. this is cruelty in action.

and it's fucked up because the conversation is never just "hey, so the way we are doing this is fucking barbaric and doctors should be required to offer serious pain meds" - it's usually something around the lines of "well, it didn't kill you, did it?"

you just found out that removing that little bitch will hurt just as bad. a little pinch like how oral contraceptives have "some" serious symptoms. like your life and pain are expendable or not really important. like maybe we are all hysterical about it?

hysteria comes from the latin word for uterus, which is great!

you stand here at a crossroads. like - this thing is so important. did they really have to make it so fucking dangerous. and why is it that if you make a complaint, you're told - i didn't even want you to have this in the first place. we're told be careful what you wish for. we're told that it's our fault for wanting something so illict; we could simply choose not to need medication. that maybe if we don't like the scraps, we should get ready to starve.

we have been saying for so long - "i'm not asking you to remove the option, i'm asking you to reconsider the risk." this entire time we hear: well, this is what you wanted, isn't it?

[ellecdc]

Dude since like you would continue writing poly moonwaterkiller. Idk if you okay with it, but do you mind writing poly moonwaterkiller x sick reader. I mean, we know barty is so fucking wild. Would love to see barty doing anything for reader to make her happy, but moonwater get stress cos "no barty! she shouldn't be outside rn! She's sick!" And Barty be like "but she looks happy out hereee!!!"

Something like that, thank you! And love you both

thanks so much for your request (and your patience in me writing this for you a few months later 😅). I knew I loved the idea; just needed to wait for the right moment to write it!!

poly!moonwaterkiller x sick!reader who Barty is taking very good care of thank you very much

CW: fem!reader is poorly, Barty calls Pandora peculiar [affectionately], disgusting amount of fluff

“Dovey!” Remus exclaimed as he spotted you sitting on the stone floor of a small balcony on the side of Gryffindor tower. “What are you doing out here!?”

It had officially been about a week of this gods-awful flu that was wreaking havoc on your immune system (and more importantly, your lungs) to which Madame Pomfrey prescribed healing draughts, lots of water, and rest.

And this, Remus felt, was decidedly not rest. 

He and Regulus rushed to crouch beside your hunched over form to see that your eyes were closed as you pointed your face towards the sky. 

“Hi boys.” You offered weakly, still never opening your eyes to greet them.

“Amour, what are you doing out here?” Regulus repeated, placing the back of his hand against your temple and grimacing at the heat radiating from it. 

“Getting some sun.” You explained simply. “Haven’t been outside in ages.”

And while Remus knew that to be technically true, he also knew there had been a reason for that. 

“Dovey, it’s barely spring and it’s far too cold for you to be out here; besides, it’s mostly cloudy.” He explained, wondering how in the hell you found the energy to move yourself from Remus’ bed all the way out here when you seemed completely incapable of even opening your eyes. 

And where the hell was Junior!?

“Exactly; mostly cloudy.” Barty’s voice chimed in as he stepped out onto the balcony to join the three of them with a cup of tea in one hand and a bowl of soup in the other.

“Junior, what in Salazar’s name do you think you’re doing?” Regulus hissed at him as he placed the bowl on the ground in front of you. 

“Taking care of our girl.” He hissed back at him before softening as he turned to look at you. 

“Hey Treasure, still doing okay?” He asked softly, pushing a lock of hair behind your ear. 

You hummed in acknowledgment. 

“I brought some tea with lots of honey.” He explained as he placed the cup in your hands.

That, Remus noticed bitterly, enticed you to open your eyes. 

“Thank you.” You cooed, though the sentiment was sort of lost in the coughing fit that it elicited. 

“Junior, it’s too cold outside; she needs to be in bed.” Remus sighed disappointedly.

Disappointed that he had to play the bad cop, and disappointed because this looked like a really nice way to spend the afternoon. 

If you were tired of being sick, Remus was tired of watching you feel so poorly and not being able to do anything to fix it. 

“I cannot believe you think me daft enough to leave her to the elements, Lupin.” Barty sneered as he resituated the blanket that had begun to slide off your shoulder. “She has four layers on and a heating charm surrounding her, Evans had some muggle fever reducers that I gave her just before I went to the kitchens, and vitamin D is supposed to support healthy immune system function. So suck my dick; the both of you.”

“Okay.” Remus offered quickly at the same time Regulus let out a tiresome “Barty”. 

“You feel better already, don’t you baby?” He cooed as he sat beside you and pressed a kiss to your overly hot temple.

You hummed in the affirmative again. 

“Okay, but where are her shoes?” Remus continued, noting the way you were sitting with your knees up to your chest and the soles of your feet pressed firmly into the stone beneath you.

Barty seemed to turn a bit bashful at that before quickly schooling his expression. “It’s quite simple, really. Pandora suggested that she ought to try grounding.”

Though his tone was haughty, he turned bashful again when he received no response from either of his boyfriends.

“Said it would be good for her…chakras or her aura or…I don’t know! Alright!? I don’t know; but Salazar’s saggy balls, she’s been so sick for so long and I just wanted her to feel better. So yeah, I listened to Peculiar Pandora, okay? Sue me.” 

Barty hardly had a moment to pout before Remus was wrestling the Slytherin into his lap as Regulus cooed at him.

“Barty’s going soft.” Regulus taunted lovingly.

“I will literally bite your fucking head off, Black; try me.”

“You’re just soft for our girl, hm?” Remus purred into Barty’s ear, relishing in the way the notoriously tense boy melted for him.

Barty made a harrumphing sound half way between reluctant admittance and a whine. 

“Be nice to him.” You admonished quietly; opening one eye at Remus and Barty as you leaned into Regulus’ side who had moved to sit beside you in Barty’s place. 

“He is being nice.” Regulus defended quickly.

“I’m always nice.” Remus added. “I’m alway nice to you, aren’t I?” He continued as he looked down at Barty, currently curled up in his lap. 

“You’re mean.” Barty pouted.

“Come now.”

“Horrid.”

“Yeah?”

“Just awful.”

Remus beamed down at the petulant boy before nuzzling his face into his neck.

“You love it.” He accused.

Barty was quiet for a moment as he drew circles on the back of Remus’ hand. “Maybe.”

Remus was very thankful that Barty was such a clever person, because sitting out here with his three loves on this semi-lovely Scottish spring day felt an awful lot like Remus’ own little personal heaven.

[generalsdiary]

listen I might sound crazy but you know how Aventurine would spend all of his money on his family were they alive? like they grew up poor- worse than poor, and he is always gambling yes- but he is also insanely rich. you just know he'd shower them in money and buy everything for them and that credits today have little to no meaning to him because he has gotten them too late. it wasn't "fast enough" to save them, to ease their lives. and you just know he regrets it, but still hoards more credits, gambling, earning, wasting, etc.

now allow me to draw a parallel to a character in gi most of the fandom doesn't like. dori. LET ME SPEAK- dori's sister died (in her arms) from an illness because her family didn't have enough money to buy the herbs prescribed for her sister's treatment and that is why Dori ends up cherishing every mora/money, turns in a mora hungry capitalist powerhouse and makes everything about her; just money. because she couldn't help her sibling when it mattered. also the "limitless mora" for her comes from receiving a bunch of items from Alice (Klee's mom) - they made a business deal, etc, just a detail.

and it is interesting how most of the fandom dislikes dori so much (meta wise I get it, and also some other povs), when the parallel to aventurine is a straight line and he is loved and liked by so many (granted, I love riney). no amount of mora/credits can bring their family member(s) back or fix what happened, yet they stay in it, hoarding more, be it due to our boy's luck, or Dori's deal and persistence. I know many ppl draw his line to Kaveh, but from this pov it is screaming Dori.

and yh his story is more tragic- but we are talking money rn ppl- stay focused;

here is where their characters differ in the money area. with how little regard he has towards the money, Aventurine, our Kakavasha is so kind, so so kind. he gives out freely, he doesn't give two shits while sending money to the TB (it is worth mentioning that he thinks he also HAS to do it, and that gifts and things of high material value are most appreciated, ex. the gifts the TB receives after become the captain of the ship in penacony. he sadly has a view of it that everyone needs to be given something in return, truly struggling with forming real friendships/relationships except with the TB and Ratio- which I'd love to go more into on another analysis), he openly shares his money to whomever- and in his contrast, dori would probably rather jump off a cliff than give a single gold mora coin to... well, anyone.

both have been through such tragedy and turned rich later on through various means- when it technically no longer matters to them as much as it could've mattered before- and to see one be indifferent towards it/see it as a means to an end & what ppl respond well to vs. the other be stingy to the point she is hurting people while doing it and purposefully putting them in debt (I hate you for what you did to Kaveh TWICE, dori.), makes a really interesting parallel made by hoyo ngl. thoughts?

[theapollosystem]

I have an eating disorder hasn’t ever been formally diagnosed cause when i was a kid doctors just kinda shrugged it off. I have ARFID which means i’m very particular around the foods i eat and I often won’t eat if everything seems like horrible sensory.

I often have a very low appetite naturally I don’t feel hungry I actually was on a medication to help that for a bit, our mother made us get off it cause she believed it was causing a drug interaction (it wasn’t our doctor said it was fine she just has a very bad untreated anxiety disorder).

I often forget I technically have an eating disorder cause it’s just how i am, I don’t eat enough it caused me to very small growing up. I was underweight until I was like 15, Testosterone did help our weight a lot cause before T we were barely in Normal weight. Still my appetite issues are still here.

Related to the disorder I have a lot of fear about throwing up and we do a lot, the medication we were on helped with that too. Damn maybe we should ask a doctor to re prescribe it to us now that we’re paying for our own medications.

Anyways back to the main point, despite having an eating disorder that affects my daily life I often feel bad saying I have an eating disorder as it’s not like serious. Okay it kinda is, my parents also made it extremely worse cause instead of just having me get an NJ or another feeding tube as a kid. They forced me to eat like physically would force us to eat which was extremely traumatizing as I was a very young child and didn’t know what was going on. Which caused my relationship with food to be even worse.

What I was trying to say is usually it is not as serious as Anorexia,Bulimia, and Binge Eating disorder. As unlike those there’s no body image issues, it’s literally just my brain going all food bad rather starve.

ARFID is really common in people with Autism and/or ADHD. Cause it’s based on sensory issues which are things people with neurodivergence tend to have.

My parents really didn’t know how to raise a neurodivergent child so instead of being caring, they were like my child’s having a meltdown again, yell at them to shut up and them it’s disrespectful to act that way.

[666writingcafe]

Summons

Diavolo

𝔗𝔥𝔢 ℌ𝔬𝔲𝔰𝔢 𝔬𝔣 𝔏𝔬𝔯𝔡𝔰 𝔥𝔞𝔰 𝔡𝔢𝔱𝔢𝔯𝔪𝔦𝔫𝔢𝔡 𝔱𝔥𝔞𝔱 𝔱𝔥𝔢 𝔡𝔞𝔪𝔞𝔤𝔢 𝔠𝔞𝔲𝔰𝔢𝔡 𝔟𝔶 𝔅𝔢𝔢𝔩𝔷𝔢𝔟𝔲𝔟, 𝔄𝔳𝔞𝔱𝔞𝔯 𝔬𝔣 𝔊𝔩𝔲𝔱𝔱𝔬𝔫𝔶, 𝔰𝔢𝔯𝔳𝔢 𝔞𝔰 𝔞 𝔡𝔢𝔠𝔩𝔞𝔯𝔞𝔱𝔦𝔬𝔫 𝔬𝔣 𝔴𝔞𝔯 𝔞𝔤𝔞𝔦𝔫𝔰𝔱 𝔱𝔥𝔢 𝔇𝔢𝔳𝔦𝔩𝔡𝔬𝔪. 𝔖𝔦𝔫𝔠𝔢 𝔶𝔬𝔲 𝔥𝔞𝔳𝔢 𝔞𝔠𝔠𝔢𝔭𝔱𝔢𝔡 𝔯𝔢𝔰𝔭𝔬𝔫𝔰𝔦𝔟𝔦𝔩𝔦𝔱𝔶 𝔣𝔬𝔯 𝔱𝔥𝔢 𝔣𝔞𝔩𝔩𝔢𝔫 𝔞𝔫𝔤𝔢𝔩𝔰' 𝔦𝔫𝔱𝔢𝔤𝔯𝔞𝔱𝔦𝔬𝔫 𝔦𝔫𝔱𝔬 𝔬𝔲𝔯 𝔰𝔬𝔠𝔦𝔢𝔱𝔶, 𝔅𝔢𝔢𝔩𝔷𝔢𝔟𝔲𝔟'𝔰 𝔞𝔠𝔱𝔦𝔬𝔫𝔰 𝔰𝔥𝔬𝔴 𝔣𝔞𝔦𝔩𝔲𝔯𝔢 𝔬𝔫 𝔶𝔬𝔲𝔯 𝔭𝔞𝔯𝔱, 𝔞𝔫𝔡 𝔴𝔢 𝔮𝔲𝔢𝔰𝔱𝔦𝔬𝔫 𝔶𝔬𝔲𝔯 𝔞𝔟𝔦𝔩𝔦𝔱𝔶 𝔱𝔬 𝔩𝔢𝔞𝔡 𝔢𝔣𝔣𝔢𝔠𝔱𝔦𝔳𝔢𝔩𝔶. 𝔚𝔢 𝔥𝔢𝔯𝔢𝔟𝔶 𝔡𝔢𝔠𝔯𝔢𝔢 𝔱𝔥𝔞𝔱 𝔶𝔬𝔲 𝔞𝔯𝔢 𝔤𝔬 𝔱𝔥𝔯𝔬𝔲𝔤𝔥 𝔱𝔥𝔢 𝔎𝔦𝔫𝔤𝔰𝔟𝔩𝔬𝔬𝔡 ℭ𝔯𝔲𝔠𝔦𝔟𝔩𝔢 𝔱𝔬 𝔭𝔯𝔬𝔳𝔢 𝔱𝔥𝔞𝔱 𝔶𝔬𝔲 𝔞𝔯𝔢 𝔴𝔬𝔯𝔱𝔥𝔶 𝔬𝔣 𝔟𝔢𝔠𝔬𝔪𝔦𝔫𝔤 𝔱𝔥𝔢 𝔫𝔢𝔵𝔱 𝔇𝔢𝔪𝔬𝔫 𝔎𝔦𝔫𝔤. 𝔉𝔞𝔦𝔩𝔲𝔯𝔢 𝔱𝔬 𝔭𝔞𝔯𝔱𝔦𝔠𝔦𝔭𝔞𝔱𝔢 𝔬𝔯 𝔭𝔞𝔰𝔰 𝔴𝔦𝔩𝔩 𝔯𝔢𝔰𝔲𝔩𝔱 𝔦𝔫 𝔦𝔪𝔪𝔢𝔡𝔦𝔞𝔱𝔢 𝔞𝔟𝔡𝔦𝔠𝔞𝔱𝔦𝔬𝔫 𝔬𝔣 𝔱𝔥𝔢 𝔠𝔯𝔬𝔴𝔫 𝔞𝔫𝔡 𝔢𝔵𝔦𝔩𝔢 𝔱𝔬 𝔄𝔰𝔥𝔢𝔫𝔱𝔥𝔬𝔯𝔫. 𝔄𝔰 𝔦𝔰 𝔠𝔲𝔰𝔱𝔬𝔪𝔞𝔯𝔶, 𝔶𝔬𝔲 𝔞𝔯𝔢 𝔞𝔩𝔩𝔬𝔴𝔢𝔡 𝔞 𝔰𝔦𝔫𝔤𝔩𝔢 𝔴𝔦𝔱𝔫𝔢𝔰𝔰 𝔱𝔬 𝔞𝔠𝔠𝔬𝔪𝔭𝔞𝔫𝔶 𝔶𝔬𝔲 𝔱𝔬 𝔱𝔥𝔢 𝔎𝔦𝔫𝔤𝔰𝔟𝔩𝔬𝔬𝔡 ℭ𝔯𝔲𝔠𝔦𝔟𝔩𝔢. ℑ𝔣 𝔶𝔬𝔲 𝔠𝔞𝔫𝔫𝔬𝔱 𝔭𝔯𝔬𝔡𝔲𝔠𝔢 𝔞 𝔴𝔦𝔱𝔫𝔢𝔰𝔰 𝔬𝔣 𝔶𝔬𝔲𝔯 𝔬𝔴𝔫 𝔠𝔥𝔬𝔬𝔰𝔦𝔫𝔤, 𝔬𝔫𝔢 𝔴𝔦𝔩𝔩 𝔟𝔢 𝔭𝔯𝔬𝔳𝔦𝔡𝔢𝔡 𝔣𝔬𝔯 𝔶𝔬𝔲.

Transcription:

The House of Lords has determined that the damage caused by Beelzebub, Avatar of Gluttony, serve as a declaration of war against the Devildom. Since you have accepted responsibility for the fallen angels' integration into our society, Beelzebub's actions show failure on your part, and we question your ability to lead effectively. We hereby decree that you are go through the Kingsblood Crucible to prove that you are worthy of becoming the next Demon King. Failure to participate or pass will result in immediate abdication of the crown and exile to Ashenthorn. As is customary, you are allowed a single witness to accompany you to the Kingsblood Crucible. If you cannot produce a witness of your own choosing, one will be provided for you.

MC hands the letter back to me, and I fold it up and stick it in an inside pocket.

"Do you have someone in mind to serve as witness?" they ask. I sigh. I knew that this was going to be the hardest part of this conversation. Not the indefinite postponement of the opening ceremony, not having MC feel like all their hard work had gone to waste, but this.

"I was actually thinking of you." Their eyes widen.

"Me? Diavolo, are you sure that's wise? I mean, I'm technically not supposed to even be here! Am I really your best option for something as serious as this?"

"Yes." Silence. "The majority of the House of Lords were personally appointed by my father, so you can imagine the type of political ideology they prescribe to. With me out of the way, they can punish the brothers as harshly as they please with no fear of repercussions."

"So they'll do everything they can to ensure your failure."

"Exactly. I know I'll pass the first part just fine, because it's just proving that I'm a member of the royal bloodline, but it's the second part that I'm worried about: The Testament of Virtue. According to my father, it's different for every person, which is probably where--"

"--the House of Lords will make sure the odds are stacked against you," MC finishes. "And if they choose the witness, they'll have the ultimate advantage over you." A brief pause. "But that still doesn't quite explain why you want me as opposed to someone else."

"Because they don't know you, and so they're less likely to rig the trial in their favor." MC doesn't seem convinced. "Look, I never said it was a brilliant plan, but it's the best one I have to ensure that I keep my position."

"And that I get to go home," they whisper. Looking away from me, they rearrange some paperwork on their desk, but that doesn't stop me from catching the sad look in their eyes.

MC's soul has been a lot of trauma. Be kind to it, Lord Diavolo. You don't want to become its enemy.

I find myself walking around the desk and place a hand on MC's shoulder.

"No matter what happens, I will make sure no harm comes to you." The small smile on their lips is full of doubt. I can't deny that I've grown rather fond of them during their stay here. They're rather sweet.

"Don't make promises you can't keep."

"I'm a man of my word, MC." They stand up, turning around to face me.

"That won't do me any good if you fail this trial. You'll won't have the kind of power necessary to override any decision they make about my fate."

"Then help me pass." I gently lift their chin up so that they're looking directly into my eyes. "Please."

A flash of color momentarily blinds me, but when my sight returns to normal, MC accepts my offer. I leave their room so that they can have their space, but I don't go very far. I lean against the wall facing their door and close my eyes.

This has been happening for as long as I can remember. Barbatos says that the flashes are visions of futures passing by very quickly, and they're only ever depicting brief moments in time. A snapshot, if you will. I don't have the ability to follow their thread like he does, but I have learned to bring these flashes into focus and see more of its details. I just have to do it right away, or otherwise the flash continues on its merry way with no intention of ever returning.

The primary color of this particular flash is gold, but there's also black and red spots mixed in. I start with the most familiar blob: myself. Working on the surrounding area, I see myself sitting on the throne proudly, horns and wings on full display. There's a similarly shaped chair next to me. It most likely belongs to my future queen and wife. Not that I would oppose to having a man rule beside me, but tradition isn't nearly that progressive yet. It insists on me producing a heir and continuing the royal legacy.

It takes me a bit for me to make out the figure in the second chair, but as soon as I realize who it is, my eyes fly open, my heart beginning to beat faster.

Clearly, that particular future is possible, or I wouldn't have seen it, but the vision still baffles me. In what world would a human be able to rule side by side with a demon?

Taglist: @lost-in-time-wanderer, @fuzztacular, @dianedancer18, @sweetbrier2908, @flare-love, @completelyshatteredbrokenmschf, @thunderlightning351, @l3v1chan, @anxious-chick, @5mary5, @expressionless-fr, @tenkobitch

[somewhat-very-insane]

questions i am sick and tired of hearing as a chronically ill and disabled person (and why i hate them)

this did wind up a bit longer than i expected it to, but by all means, feel free to add on with any questions you hate to be asked (and why!)

abled people, please do refrain from overtaking this post, and, disabled people, please do refrain from making this post entirely about any one specific condition.

"do you really have to talk about being disabled all the time?"

yes. yes i do. i promise that however annoying it is for you to have to endure the absolute agony that must be me making an offhand comment, or, on occasion, maybe actually talking about something that affects me for more than a few minutes at once, it is infinitely more "annoying" for me to have to actually live with the issues i talk about for every second of every day of my whole life. when i stop talking, you don't have to think about it anymore. but i always have to think about it. you get to put your full focus on something else, or, if the conversation is that annoying for you, you can leave! nobody is forcing you to stay. but talking about my problems is the only way i can get any support for them, and even when i stop, they are still there. i cannot "step away" from the figurative "conversation" with my pain. it is always talking to me, whether it be just a small whisper in the background or screaming at the top of its lungs in my ears, that pain is always there. so, while it's unfortunate that you are getting "tired of hearing about it," please do understand that i got tired of experiencing it a long, long time ago; do not destroy my one way to speak about my experiences solely because you do not wish to be made uncomfortable by them.

"do you really need that pain medication? won't you get addicted?"

in response to that, let me ask you this: do you really need that water you're drinking? aren't you afraid you'll get addicted to drinking water? it sounds ridiculous, i am aware. but i will break it down for you, now (as, in my mind, it is an adequate comparison). every human being needs things like safe, clean water, food, and some form of shelter to survive. however, the majority of humans can survive adequately with a reasonable amount of these items and will be able to function without major pain or other symptoms that detract from their general quality of life. some people, like myself, can have our basic needs of food, water, and shelter met, yet still experience major (or minor) pain, which cannot be blamed on a lack of rest, hunger, or thirst. therefore, in order to function the way society expects us to, and in order to not be quite as utterly miserable as we otherwise would, we may rely on other, stronger medications than the average person would, to manage that pain. these medications are medically prescribed, and we therefore have every right to utilize the resources provided to us. if i were to simply stop taking certain "non-necessary" medications, while my body would technically continue to function with the aid of my "necessary" medications, i as a person would not be able to function. imagine, if you will, the worst headache, joint pain, cramp, or other temporary ailment you have ever experienced. that probably wasn't a very enjoyable experience for you, was it? but you might've been able to use some ibuprofen or acetaminophen, maybe a heating pad, and after a little while it got better. now imagine if you tried to use those same things but the pain did not get better; imagine that pain lasting for months, even years on end, which you simply could not get rid of. a pain which you were expected to simply pretend was not bothering you, and continue to function the same way as everyone else, who was not in pain, was capable of. surely, in this hypothetical, you would want the (perfectly safe, legal, usually non-addictive) medicine that could make that pain even a little bit less excruciating? even if you knew that the pain would never fully disappear, not really, you would still want it to be less. so, i will take my medications, and leave you with the freedom to choose what you put in your body, just as i deserve the same freedom over mine.

"have you tried just exercising? eating healthier? meditation?"

the short answer is, for almost every disabled person i know, yes. though, granted that you've come this far, i'm sure you are prepared for the long answer, too. exercise can, for some conditions, help to alleviate or lessen certain symptoms. the key thing to note here, though, is that the exercise must be safe and selected specifically for the person based on how it may negatively affect them, as well. even activities that most able-bodied people regard as minor, such as going on a walk, can be draining, nausea-inducing, painful, and outright miserable for some people. i cannot, personally, go on a fifteen-minute walk on flat, paved terrain, in very pleasant weather, without triggering dozens of sensations that would surely make any healthy person worry that they were dying. when i tried to pick up an exercise regimen without professional help, i made my health several times worse. taking the advice of people who were, sometimes, genuinely trying to help, put me in serious danger. even when i did have a team of three doctors working on a plan for me, it took several rounds of trying and failing before we were able to determine what activities i could safely do, and which would be beneficial to me. now, being told to "just eat healthier" particularly irks me, because what foods i have to eat to maintain a more "healthy" balance of sugars, sodium, protein, and fat in my system varies quite a bit from that which a healthy person might be told is the ideal. i do understand that, generally, a low-sodium, lower-fat, mainly natural-sugar, high-protein diet sounds healthiest to a large percentage of people, the same cannot be said for myself. i have been told, by numerous medical specialists, that it is absolutely necessary for me to consume high amounts of sodium (think: eating salty food and snacks, on top of an electrolyte drink and salt pill every morning). i also deal with highly fluctuating blood sugar, which doctors cannot yet explain why it suddenly plummets (no, it is not diabetes, yes, i have been asked this dozens of times). as a result, i will often have to eat something "unhealthy," such as fruit snacks or a similar gummy candy, to get my blood sugar back up. is a high-sugar, high-salt intake diet generally what outsiders will see as healthy? of course not. but, as these are things i have to do to specifically manage my symptoms, it is always frustrating to be told that maybe they are symptoms i experience because of my diet. they are not. as for the types of people who insist that simply doing a guided meditation session each day can cure me of my dozens of health conditions, you are simply incorrect. while some people may experience a temporary psychosomatic alleviation of their pain in response to practicing mindfulness techniques, no one should ever urge another human being to substitute life-saving medication with guided breathing and essential oils. the two are simply not on the same level, and meditation does not, cannot, and will not help every disabled person deal with their symptoms.

"aren't you too young to be so unhealthy?"

no. and, while i do wish that people would not press further when faced with such a simple, clear-cut response, some people simply cannot grasp the idea that anyone under forty-five could possibly deal with any sort of health complications. people can be unhealthy at any age; even infants can have heart conditions, after all. while old age certainly has a higher correlation with deteriorating health, it is certainly not a reason to believe that, therefore, anyone who is not old cannot have poor health. believe me, i do wish that whenever someone older told me that i really am just overthinking things and lying to all my doctors and somehow faking things like MRI and X-ray results, those problems simply disappeared. unfortunately, things do not work that way, and by saying things like that not only do you invalidate the experiences of countless ill individuals, you (deliberately or not) paint us as bad people, when all we want to do is survive.

[valeriefauxnom]

Yo, since you brought it up, what's the interpretation of Abyss's ending you like the most?

Going for blood, huh, anon? I'll bite!

I'm on the side of 'technically I think it should be Asch in Luke's body' side even if I acknowledge it's ultimately ambiguous.

The Contamination sidequest, of course, is the principle foundation for this argument, as it spells out pretty clearly: Asch will die, but Asch will assume Luke's body as a backup. Luke will remain in body but not spirit, further twisting the knife to Jade, who no longer would want his dream of 'replicas as a replacement body' to come true as he wished for Nebilim.

We also see an example of the effect with Star in Ortion cavern. The group comes back to see that the original cheagle has died, and the replica remains. But when Jade interviews the cheagle via Mieu, he finds out that it is the original in the replica's body, who felt weak, passed out, and woke up in another body.

More arguably, but I also might look to Jade's immediate response after he learns of Asch's death. He starts asking Luke about how it feels and all that, likely trying to get a gauge on what's happening, if there's any chance Luke is escaping the Big Bang, etc. He wants Luke to escape this with his life, no matter how dismal the odds even without Asch's death.

...And he doesn't seem pleased with the response he gets.

There's also his response at Tataroo itself, which, okay, very arguable, but to me is not a pleased look from Jade. I'm not claiming to be any kind of expert on reading emotions, but Jade's to me looks like one more of grief and/or disappointment than of happiness, especially in the anime, which could have more expressiveness than the original PS2 graphics in a game that had some notably poorly cutscenes.

And while yes, the mysterious figure does have more visual hints to Luke than Asch, and does reference a 'promise', I will say that to the latter both of the redheads were chucking around promises to everyone and is ambiguous. Luke's promise to Guy, to Tear, Asch's to Luke, etc.

Also, I just think it could be a unique and sad ending if Asch, who has utterly loathed replicas and the concept of one, from Van's grooming and his own trauma regarding Luke's replacement, finds himself a 'replica' in the new world, in his counterpart's body, and has to start trying to figure out what to do and who to be in the new world while puppeting around what's effectively the corpse of another person. It's just uniquely horrifying a concept that I would have loved to see explored. Heck, maybe even a postgame or game about the Jade Gang dealing with the impending fonon crisis while maybe trying to find a way to get Luke back and all the drama that could result would have been fun.

...But, as always, this is a very cursory summary of some of the most common arguments for Asch. We could dissect the Contamination Effect and Big Bang and all that all day, but to me, I personally don't see any evidence that it is not working as prescribed on Eldrant, or 'reversed' as some people argue. The one example we see is it working as intended, and Jade doesn't seem all that pleased when it seems like it's starting to kick up with Luke.

However, I'd like to throw a much rarer argument into the works as a thing to consider, just for fun.

What if it's not Asch in Luke's body or the reverse, or a merging of the two into one mind/body...But Lorelei?

To this, I'd like to point out that Lorelei has a sworn duty to answer the Grand Fonic Hymn of Yulia. And what was Tear signing right before this mysterious person popped up randomly in a field when Luke nor Asch show a particular skill in stealth? Well I mean Luke says he's good at hide and seek but still

Uh-huh, Grand Fonic Hymn. This could also explain the 'promised' quote. Lorelei is fulfilling its covenant with Yulia in heeding her descendant's call.

The mysterious person's speech and behavior, for however short we see it, is...ethereal? For lack of a better word? Detached? Both Luke and Asch are very emotional people and don't tend to speak in such a even, neutral tone. Lorelei, however, is a fonic sentience (well, so is Luke, but Luke is a mini chunk of Lorelei) and is not human at the end of the day. What few lines we do get from it in game are 'indirect' and otherwise formatted in a manner humans don't usually use when speaking. To me, the more detached 'This place has a nice view of Hod' compared to anything Luke or Asch might have said normally, even a greeting, is more aligned with Lorelei's potential behavior.

So yeah. Perhaps it's Lorelei, come to Auldrant after heeding Tear's call, perhaps in its' scions' visages, attempting to honor them both by assuming elements of both now that they (or at least Luke) have re-assimilated into the greater whole of Lorelei. Lorelei certainly seems to like its scions.

In the end I can just summarize: scientifically, I think it's Asch, canonically, it's ambiguous. No matter what side of the debate one is on, I dislike people trying to insist that it is absolute fact that x happened. I think part of the ambiguity is intended to reflect the fact that the Score is gone, the future is no longer set. Notice also how all the text boxes are gone after the Score is repealed. What they're saying- what's happening is no longer has a single canonical answer. So even if I do think more of the rules of the Abyss world point to Asch, it's ultimately up in the air.

[blazehedgehog]

Would you claim that Sonic as a whole has more than just subjective personal merit, that it is more than just "a fun franchise to escape in from the troubles of life"? Does it have any "objective" meaning in the sense a great work of art has or is it just a fun blue hedgehog and nothing more?

This is going to sound rude, but: I don't care?

This is buried in my inbox a bit, but I remember there being a line of questions I got last year that seemed to be from someone who was either experiencing a crisis of faith with their sense of belonging within the Sonic fandom, or were trying to poke at me to see if I had any misgivings.

And this feels like another one of those asks from someone who is fishing for an answer along the lines of "Why do you care so much?"

In romance there's always this talk of "love at first sight." You see a person and you just know that your search is over, their the one, and you'll devote yourself to them no matter what.

I'd argue that happens for a lot of things. Not that you think of something in romantic terms, but that you find the right thing at the right time in your life and there's an instant connection. You can't really explain it because consciously you don't know. There's something deeper that feeds a part of your soul you aren't even aware of.

Like, I know food metaphors are really basic, but you know how sometimes you get an intense craving for something? That can be your body signalling that "hey, we're getting low on iron, could you eat, like, a big meaty hamburger for us?"

Your brain doesn't know that. There is no sign that lights up in your head that specifically says, in human English, "consume more iron." You don't know what's really going on, just that you can't stop thinking about a specific type of food that is rich in a vitamin or mineral your body needs more of. So while you, personally, in your head your only thought is "man that burger tasted amazing, I really needed that" the rest of your body is receiving a critical shipment of some vital element it needed for comfortable operation and technically you're none the wiser that the two were connected.

My point in all of this is not that you're an idiot and I'm somehow superior or that we should dig deep to discover the meanings of what our feelings are really telling us...

My point is that sometimes you want a thing, so you should have the thing. That's it. That's all. It doesn't have to be complicated. As long as you're not doing anything unhealthy, you should fulfill your needs, because they are needs for a reason. And sometimes, if you stop and try really hard to unpack and diagnose why you want the mysteries of your wants, you open the door to all kinds of other problems.

Let's go back to an iron deficiency. How do you detect that? With a blood test. You take a certain number of milliliters of blood, there's probably blotting paper involved, maybe a centrifuge, and you're given a blood cell count. You can't do that on your own.

If you try to self-diagnose iron deficiency at home, you could end up chasing shadows, getting it wrong, and never even know it. For months, maybe years, maybe your entire life. You need to see a doctor, and then the doctor prescribes vitamins or whatever.

You... can't... really do that with emotions. You can't go to a doctor, ask "Why do I like Sonic the Hedgehog? Is there a deeper meaning?" and get a medically consistent answer. A therapist can speculate, they can point you in directions, make suggestions of what it could be, and in the end they may even be correct. But maybe they aren't. And what works for one person might not work for another.

There is no Sonic the Hedgehog deficiency test.

I am of the type where, since it's not an affliction and is just fandom funnies, I don't think about it too hard. I just ride the wave, enjoy it for what it is, and let my brain indulge in the simple pleasure of going "wheeeeeee" without any consequences. It can just be what it is.

Is there a deeper meaning? Probably, yeah. Nature versus technology, kids versus adults, fantasy versus science, adrenaline versus sedentary. There's a lot of interpretations.

And for me, I've mentioned it before, but my dad was a drag racer. I never knew him much for a variety of different (mostly sad) reasons, but he owned and maintained his own car named "Ol' Yeller" that he used to compete in local events (his was hot rod modded Chevy Belair). When it came to what he spent his money on, he put it into going fast. Which, even if he never could consciously impart that on me, seems to have manifested in other ways.

I have never been a fan of trying to coax meaning out of places where there might not be any. Sometimes you just want to go fast and bop a funny robot, and whatever urges that satisfies in my brain, I don't care much to unpack it, because I'd rather be going fast and bopping robots, you know?

[veloriajones]

The one scene that never fails to have me cry my eyes out... it just gets to me on a level I can't really explain, cuts deep through the mental health fog and just... connects. The first time I saw this scene I had to take a break from my PC so I could bawl my eyes out.

"If you would humor me a moment─when we awaken each morning, how can we prove that we're the same individual who retired the night before?

Through the remembrance of past events, we might say. We have our memories. Yet there are times when we forget, or recall incorrectly.

What of our bodies, then? It is the same one, we might say. Yet technically speaking, as living beings, our bodies are constantly changing. It will never be as it was at an earlier point in time.

Our souls are no more immutable. On our star, people are known to inherit the souls of others, yet they are decidedly different beings.

For my part, I've subjected my totality to much and more. I've made my body into an extension of a tower. Blended my soul and memories with those of another self.

And each time, I would ask myself: what is it that makes me, me?

"Were you able to determine an answer?

"No. But that doesn't mean I'm confused. It simply means I'm the same as everyone else.

So I posit this: who we were need not prescribe what we now hold in our hearts.

Whatever came before, what matters most is the present.

For me, that is being here with my friends. Full proud of how much we've grown together.

So I urge you to not give up. Heed your heart's desire, and hope that the future you long for shall be realized!"

"I...cannot. We cannot.

We cannot understand desire, nor comprehend hope. We do not know how to create such things."

"We're not unalike, you and I... I too have struggled to find the courage to express and embrace my wants.

If you like, I will tell you a tale. A tale of a world on the brink. Of a people who never gave up on the future.

Of a man who realized his grandest dreams, and then awakened to a grander reality."

[thewonandonly]

20:38 — the bitch still call me crazy, little ho, how does that work? she got the guest house jumping up with smoke out the attic, you're right, i know we like to argue, let's get at it | SPIT IN MY FACE! by thxsomuch

seonghwa hated working at the convenience store with the girl. he thought it was beneath him, almost. it was only his first day, and he didn't have much experience in retail, despite what he mentioned in his résumé.

his fingers hovered over the unblock button of the girl's phone number, which he pressed after a momentary thought to himself.

sending an empty text to the chat room, he set the phone down.

who does she think she is, is all he could think. seonghwa couldn't help but think that she thought she was better than him, which was further from the truth. seonghwa knew about people and their up and downs. he experienced that first hand. when that doctor was in a bad mood, he poked him with needles, over-prescribed medication and gave the other inpatients double a dosage just to make them sleep. and when he was in a good news, he'd double the room time for arts and crafts, he'd bring in a karaoke machine, books. anything to make them match his mood.

seonghwa was aware of human's ups and downs, and it seemed this girl had a lot of them.

as she responded giving him a "first day" evaluation, seonghwa couldn't help the anger that bubbled in his throat; he wasn't late, he definitely didn't hog the music player, and he wasn't coercing customers into buying more. who doesn't like a compliment here and there? and the whole finger thing, it was a tiny cut on his thumb. it wasn't like he did it on purpose to get out of doing anything. if anything, she was the one who was blowing the entire thing out of proportion.

but, seonghwa was nothing if not a jokester. he replied simply with everything from his perspective; technically, he wasn't given a time to arrive at, so he was right on time. he made sure it was aware that loud music of any sort was an osha violation. he joked that she was the one who entrusted him with a box cutter and that he was making more money for the place for the store than she ever would.

it was met only with a poor attempt at criticizing and belittling him; a plain text that read "i hate you." which she immediately began to rehash her response by typing again.

seonghwa couldn't help the chuckle what she was saying; to say seonghwa liked to see people mad was a bit rude to say, but it was true. he liked to see people mad. it means he got through their thick skin.

"that's cute." he whispered to himself, reading the paragraph listing all the personality traits he recognized.

she finished off the essay with a simple text that read; "you remind me of my father."

he wasn't sure if it was an insult, since he didn't know her father, so he just took it as an insult and locked his phone.

he could already imagine her stomping her feet like the child she was, and chuckled to himself. getting under her skin was fun. no matter how many times she told herself that she didn't dislike him, the texts were enough to already show him how much she did.

and maybe it'll be easier for him at work without her trying to get on his ass about a bunch of shit.

the arguments the two shared was laughable, and anyone walking by would think the two were just old friends. but seonghwa knew she liked to get that pent-up aggression out.

he was gonna have fun with it.

copyright © 2023 thewonandonly. all rights reserved.

[mlobsters]

things i learned about the opioid crisis that truly shocked me

oxycontin (oxycodone) is more powerful than morphine (i thought i had a decent understanding of opiates, apparently not)

purdue (makers of oxycontin) claimed less than 1% of people got addicted based on a handful of sentences letter to the editor (link to letter in NEJM) in a medical journal about patients taking short term narcotics in a hospital environment and called it a study

the package insert said "Delayed absorption as provided by oxycontin is believed to reduce the abuse liability of a drug." no proof - just believed.

the medical officer at the FDA, curtis wright, allegedly drafted the medical review with purdue including claims about very limited rates of addiction and potential for abuse. a year later, he went to work for purdue

sales reps were paid commission by the number of milligrams their doctors prescribed, encouraging doctors to continue increasing dosages

purdue claimed oxy didn't have the peaks and valleys associated with opioids and used an extremely distorted graph that was incredibly misleading to prove their point (log scale that flattened the curves)

they created the concept of "pseudoaddiction" which meant drug seeking addiction behavior was actually untreated pain so the solution was to increase the dosage

the company who launched the fentanyl spray subsys were encouraging doctors to prescribe it offlabel for back pain and the like with the explantion "pain is pain" asking how is back pain different than end of life cancer pain

i knew fentanyl was a serious problem but i had no idea the overdose deaths increase after the launch of subsys and competitors in 2012 was this stark and terrifying

insys was investing $3-4 million dollars in speaker programs that were a cover for bribing doctors to increase prescriptions of their fentanyl product

in 2015, subsys was one of the top five most profitable opioid products in the US - something that was only indicated for breakthrough pain in cancer patients on around the clock pain management with high opiate tolerance levels as part of end of life care

medicare would not approve the prescriptions and pay for them (many thousands of dollars for one month of subsys) for offlabel uses, so insys created a system where their reps would pretend to be from the doctor's office (in collusion with doctors, dr office would give the private patient information so insys could have the information needed) and lie about the diagnosis to get it approved

actual promo video for sales reps to sell fentanyl

from burlakof, former vp of sales at insys: "the only way that i knew how to do it, to get that guarantee, is to bribe doctors." "you're saying bribery, like you're kind of--" "yes, i am" "that has a really kind of, big meaning, that word." "yes. i think to use any other word would be irresponsible of me at this point." "back then, did you think, 'oh, i'm going to bribe people'?" "yes."

90% of all hydrocodone production was going to pill mills in the late 2000s

at one point broward county alone (ft lauderdale, just a bit north of miami) had 150 pill mills

florida regulations were so lax, anyone could open a pain management clinic - including people with felony drug convictions

florida also did not track out of state people filling prescriptions that would throw up red flags like it did in other states

a retired dea agent, lou fisher, worked with large pill mills to make sure they followed requirements and could pass inspections by dea acting as their "compliance officer"

but fisher was being paid by the wholesaler, he maintains he didn't do anything wrong

by putting prescribing into the hands of corrupt doctors, they could technically be following the rules

once the pill mills were shut down, a large population had been addicted to opioids via pills now only had heroin to turn to

the george brothers and others in pill mills were indicted under the federal RICO act and it was the largest prescription drug trafficking case in US history

chris george maintains he just ran a business. he didn't create addicts, he gave them a safer way to get their drugs. and the people coming to florida to buy his pills were the actual problem. "The patients are the ones that caused whatever problems we have here."

(ps the george brothers are also white supremacists)

stuff i've watched/listened to

American Pain (HBO) - documentary on pill mills in florida, primarily about the George brothers

The Crime of the Century (HBO) - documentary directed, produced, and written by Alex Gibney. The film follows the opioid epidemic in the United States, and the political operatives, government regulations and corporations that enable the abuse of opioids, particularly the Sackler family and Purdue Pharma. Part two focuses on the rise of fentanyl by Insys Therapeutics.

Opioids, Inc by FRONTLINE (PBS) full film on youtube

Opioids in America by American Scandal (podcast by Wondery)

Dopesick (Hulu) - dramatized series based on nonfiction book Dopesick: Dealers, Doctors, and the Drug Company that Addicted America by Beth Macy

Painkiller (Netflix) - dramatized series based on Patrick Radden Keefe's New Yorker article "The Family That Built an Empire of Pain" and Pain Killer: An Empire of Deceit and the Origin of America's Opioid Epidemic by Barry Meier

[mageofseven]

Repressed Love: A DiaLuci Love Story

Chapter 38

Tag list: @astroseuss @zarakem @brielle043 @missloserqueen

Also! I wanna say that yes, my poll for this series still technically going, but I have seriously been inspired by @phixmanic so now I just have to add MC into the mix in this series!

The general outline for how MC and Satan's subplot go was created by them, though I will be making minor tweaks here and there to make it fit better into my writing.

So yeah, thank you so much for your help and talk over this with me, Phix!

•▪︎▪︎◇°●♡●°◇▪︎▪︎•

The doctor came by to check over Diavolo. The man's face was pretty composed and his voice was controled.

However, his eyes revealed his worry.

Whether Diavolo saw it or not, it was unknown, but her two favorite men saw it instantly.

Still, both the doctor and patient stayed calm as he examined the spread of the Rot. It covered both of the pregnant woman's arms, chest, and shoulders.

In the end, the doctor wrote her a prescription for a stronger salve and a potion to boost her immune system and told the men to give them to her for next couple days and if it's still spreading then to call him ASAP.

Lucifer could sense that the doctor was censoring his words carefully, prompting the pride demon to offer to walk the doctor out in Barb's stead to ask him questions away from his fiancée's ears.

As he expected, the doctor had nothing pleasant to say during their stroll to the door.

Usually, the basic salve would enough to cure even a minor demon of this infliction and should be more than enough for a strong demon of Diavolo's heritage.

However, it's her pregnancy that's getting in the way of her recovery. Pregnancy in the Royal Family can be very demanding on a person's body, another reason why it was good that Dia was carrying the child; her body was built for it a lot better than Luce's would be.

However, that didn't mean her body wasn't going through a lot right now. Her body essentially put more focus into protecting and growing the baby than it did to heal her.

This is why the Rot is spreading instead of retreating; her immune system isn't at its strongest because the baby is taking most of her body's resources.

This is precisely why the older man prescribed the potion for her immune system, in hope that just a little boost would be enough for her body.

If not...well, further treatment would be a bit risky. If what the doctor prescribed does not work effectively, he'll have to prescribe her a potion that will draw support away from her baby and to her own body.

In that case, it wouldn't take long for the Rot to dissipate and the mother could go back to developing her child, but the child would be at risk to be born with some sort of defect.

Lucifer...he did not handle this well, but kept composed as he thanked the doctor and watched him leave out the front door.

Once the man was out the door, Lucifer pressed his back to the wall and covered his face with a hand.

It was always something. No one in his family seemed have enough luck to receive a period of peace.

What was he supposed to? If the Rot continues to spread, it could kill both her and the baby. If this prescription doesn't work though, he wasn't sure how he'd convince Diavolo take the riskier medicine.

"Stressful day?"

The man lowered his hand, seeing the one person he hasn't seen in months.

MC was standing before him, giving the poor man an encouraging smile as he raised his eyebrows.

"I wasn't aware you were returning today."

"I texted Satan about it a couple days ago, but her never messaged back." The woman's smile fell. "Is he alright? The other brothers told me you two were living with Diavolo now and a lot of things have happened since I went home, but they told me it's better to just go and see for myself."

A few months ago, MC's grandmother suddenly died and so she had to rush home for the funeral and to support her family.

This wasn't supposed to be a long visit, but things just snowballed from there.

Her grandmother didn't have a will so legally nothing the older woman owned--from the house to the camper, right down to her grandmother's pets-- were stuck in this legal debacle that her family was stuck in.

It was such a big mess so the woman stayed back to offer support to her mother as much as possibly.

After some complications, things were finally settled.

However, the woman was ignorant to just how drastically things have changed in under the year she has been gone

And honestly, Lucifer didn't know where to start at first...but settled on when he first moved in with Diavolo.

He explained his own surprised pregnancy to moving in with Dia and raising their daughter together and the former prince actually being a princess and her form change and current condition (pregnant plus...well, he left it at 'sick', not wanting to discuss the Rot right now).

When he explained Satan's previous condition and his new angelic nature, the human's concern became very apparent.

"Where is he??"

Lucifer wrapped an arm around the woman in comfort before leading her towards the hallway

And was blocked by Audriana.

"Daddy--" The little girl stopped running to him when she saw MC, but the action was a bit clumsy so she fell on her butt and cried.

Lucifer rushed over and helped her to her feet before comforting the sniffling child who hid herself from the human.

MC gawked at the child; with how much the girl looked like Diavolo, it was obvious that this was the daughter the pride demon was talking about but...it was so bizarre.

Yes, she knew this girl was born the same way Satan was and yes, she knew these children grew fast, but it was a whole other thing to see it with her own eyes, see this 10 year old girl stand before her despite actually only being a few months old.

Lucifer stroked his daughter's hair, knowing the girl was panicking because of MC, because this new person was in her home and invading her safe space.

The woman composed herself before leaning down to meet the child at eye level while also keeping some space between her and the scared girl.

MC wasn't an expert on kids by any means, but she did have some kids in her family that she got along with well so she at least had some minor skills at her disposal.

"I'm sorry; I didn't mean to scare you." She smiled at the girl. "I'm a friend of your daddy and Satan's; I'm MC, what's your name?"

The redhead continued to grip her daddy's clothes, but leaned out from behind the man to glance at the new woman.

"...Audriana." The girl mumbled.

"That's so pretty! Oh you look just like your mama!"

MC felt somewhat awkward saying that considering it seemed like a very stereotypical thing for parent's friend to say to their child, but it was too true; this girl looked more like small clone of Diavolo than a daughter.

Audri raised her head a bit and gave a small smile.

"I know, right? Me and Mama are super pretty~"

The child wasn't fully comfortable with the new person, but MC did well with breaking the ice like this.

Now that the girl was sufficiently soothed with the human's help, the father spoke to his daughter.

"Sweetheart, why aren't you in the classroom?"

"Barbie never showed." She said simply, eyes staring up at her dad innocently.

Lucifer sighed.

"He'll be by shortly." He promised before grabbing her hand. "Come. Let's get you back to the classroom so MC and I can handle something."

And with that, he dropped Audriana back in the classroom and told the Little Ds inside to keep a better eye on her before leading the woman to Satan's room.

If she was honest...MC was both nervous and impatient to see her boyfriend. It has been so long and she missed him dearly, but also...he has been struggling with some major things this entire time and he never said a word to her.

This man changed his race after all of this. That was more naturally for him than to talk about his issues with his girlfriend? Or even about his past illness?

Satan could have died; he almost died without saying a word to her and MC was hurt by this. At any point, he could have called her, texted even, about any of this. He had months to do it...

This was really causing some issues within the woman's heart, causing pain from the mix of not being there when he needed her and him not letting her be.

After all of this time, after becoming the angel he now is...would Satan still love her? Or has too much happened these past months?

She was scared to find out.

[everyonewasabird]

Brickclub 5.5.1 “Javert Derailed”

Wilbour/FMA really do this one a disservice with “Javert Off the Track” I think: I don’t know that it’s technically a mistranslation, but it makes the metaphor seem to be about detecting and criminal pursuit, when it is in fact about trains.

Which is so weird it has to mean something? Like: I think we can basically guarantee that Javert has never in his life seen a train? At this point, France has only one train line; it’s less than twelve miles long, connects two small towns a little southwest of Lyon, and opened for passengers four months ago. (England was further along in its railway journey, but I doubt Javert’s been there, either.) I’m sure urban French people of 1832 were aware of trains as a burgeoning technology, but that feels like a different relationship than one would have after living among operational railways.

On derailment specifically: It’s possible accidents due to derailment had happened by this point, but the earliest actual derailment I’m seeing on Wikipedia’s list of historical train accidents was a year later than this in New Jersey.

Why on earth are trains our metaphor?

I mean, an obvious answer is that they would have been a very available metaphor to Hugo and his audience by the time this is written, and something that’s incredibly efficient at moving in absurdly prescribed straight lines but fails catastrophically if loses that is genuinely a pretty good metaphor for Javert.

But it also feels sort of related to the ways that Javert is also in part an anachronism? This post (particularly the last reblog) points out how Javert was written partly according to what police were in his era (low-ranking, low-paid, criminal-adjacent, doing essentially grunt-work), but also to a significant extent according to what audiences had come to expect of police by 1860 (at least somewhat educated, somewhat middle-class, somewhat respectable, potentially clever at reasoning and detecting, potentially seeing their work as a calling).

And that makes sense. Hugo’s goal with Javert wasn’t solely to critique the police of the 1820s--why would he, they were extinct--but to critique policing more broadly. Making Javert a mashup of all the available police tropes, including leaning heavily on some of the more admirable ones from later in the century, makes him a much better critique of the modern criminal justice system.

I have no idea whether the modernness of the train metaphor is meant to echo the modernness of the metaphor of Javert himself, but it feels possible to me.

That the engine driver of order, that the mechanic of authority, mounted on the blind iron horse of the straight and narrow, could be thrown by a shaft of light! That the incommutable, the direct, the correct, the geometric, the passive, the perfect, could bend! That there was for the locomotive a road to Damascus!

Here, the train metaphor is coming surprisingly close to Javert’s voice. It’s not in his voice, these aren’t his metaphors (Damascus, the site of the conversion of Paul, doesn’t really feel like his metaphor family any more than trains do), and it’s way more aware of what’s happening than he is. Plus, throughout this chapter, that voice feels like it’s kind of making fun just a little bit of how stupid all his previous assumptions were, and this section feels like no exception.

But it’s close enough to feel like it’s echoing his feeling, and that’s incredibly strange? He doesn’t live in a mechanized world, so it’s fascinating that the best metaphor for him, even halfway within his own thoughts, is one of the most modern machines available to people of the time?

Most of our conversations about modernity in this book have been wildly positive--see Enjolras’s Quel Horizon speech, see Combeferre’s... everything--but it feels like now we’re acknowledging that Javert is also profoundly linked with modernity. All along we’ve seen the ancientness and hideous immutability of disproportionate punishment of crimes. But Javert isn’t linked with the old-fashioned ways of doing things, he’s linked with something much worse: he belongs to the growth of modern policing and the modern police state, a thing far more developed and formidable in Hugo’s time, I believe, than it was in canon era.

[willynillynonsense]

*So, uh.. How’s your post-movie reveal going?*

Hm?

*I mean.. You did technically get a face reveal in that one teaser trailer.*

Did we not already establish that he was just an actor pretending to be me?

*Yeah, but I think I learned a detail or two that I might need to include more in my drawings of you.*

Such as?

*You apparently had glasses at one point. No idea if they were prescribed or not.*

...There was a time when I needed reading glasses. My eyes were getting weaker when it came to reading fine print, so my optometrist provided them for me.

*They had two nose rims?*

It was... not my best fashion choice.

*And you had a beard at that time too, I’m guessing?*

I am afraid that part is a bit foggier. I had some stubble when I was Dave, but I kept clean-shaved after that. There is always the possibility that I let myself go in that department prior to my.. grisly end.

*Gotcha. I will say, Mr. Afton, I also didn’t picture you as someone who wore striped shirts. Striped suits, maybe, but.. uh..*

You were assuming that I dreaded the idea of looking like a watermelon?

*Y..Yes?*

If we were talking about my early Fredbear years, then you would be right. However, if this teaser takes place in the era I’m thinking of, then that fear was clearly out of my mind by then. I had slimmed down plenty, though more stubborn sections of my former shape lingered on. In hindsight, that might have contributed to said grisly end.

*Ohh, okay. Thanks for helping me out.*

You are welcome. However, I would advise you to not give me my old glasses until I actually need them. As I am now a ghost, my vision is unhindered by any problems I had while I was alive.

*I’ll try to remember that.*

[hesitationss]

the experiences between someone with adhd/autism who prescribe to neurodivergency and ppl w psychosis or personality disorders who are technically also neurodivergent by definition is like as vast as the ocean including with how we are perceived by those who do not know much (and i am hesitant to say "neurotypical" because of what "that" even represents under white cishetero patriarchy and capitalism) as well as those within the "community" there's a reason why when talking to any disabled person they are most often talking about being mad/disabled... as crips and crazies we understand the language we need to use for ourselves... i'm still thinking about QQ's post where they were talking about cases in which someone was receiving psych treatment was diagnosed w BPD and because ppl think it means "bad girl who lies" disorder she was wrongfully taken out of treatment for her ED describing wanting help as dependency or lying. this was sparked, of course, by the not so recent sentiment that many people LIE about their mental illness or are attention seekers. like yeah bitch if people are serially lying or self harming for attention that is literally mental illness dumb fuck. I've literally dealt w terrible people who pissed in my roommates drawer and physically threatened me before who was clearly delusional... like she was evidently mentally ill. mental illness literally is the crazy version of yourself why are people so malicious about that shit learn to set boundaries. if your friend w adhd/autism or whatever is behaving in malicious ways they don't suddenly have a personality disorder. stop pathologizing every negative trait to a PD or psychosis. there's no such thing as "narcissistic abuse" this isn't me gaslighting either... abuse is not a mental illness symptom... i know thought crimes aren't real but try understanding these situations where we have some agency in your mind idk...

it's actually fucking crazy how there are mental disorders where professionals decided sometimes they should have care and sometimes they should not. like the difference between schizophrenic treatment (reject this part of you) and OSDD/DID treatment where you are encouraged to accept your alters and come out of treatment being able to have them all as distinguished people in your symptoms and some insurance man gets to decide which one is allowed to be covered ??? it also begs me to wonder how those in ED treatment due to things like autism and adhd are recovering where if they misbehave they're "difficult" or "irrational" since they would now be in the "mad" category w the rest of us... we live in a very sick system and are so beholden to the psychiatry and the insurance man...