#What is the plural of MILF?

[the-shipping-forecasters]

FE3H Part 1: A Faculty of Milves

This week, James drags the forecasters into the dense net of romances that is Fire Emblem Three Houses. Even just focusing on one game, this fandom has more ships than the average harbour so we take a bit longer going over everyone.

Join us, as we try and find everyone an OTP, and ask the hard hitting questions; like "what is the plural of Milf?", "How many war crimes are you willing to forgive for the sake of yuri?", and "How many war crimes are you willing to forgive for the sake of Yuri? (The prettiest human in Fodlan)"

If that sounds your jam, why not listen here (and all the other podcast places too)

Or here

And join us next time, when we talk about our favourites!

[ragingbookdragon]

Soap: So if "Milf" is singular, is "Milves" the plural form? Like if you're having a threesome with two milfs is it two milves? Ghost, have you ever had a threesome with two milves?

Ghost: When they say "Be careful what you wish for," the mean it, because this is the punishment I get for asking God to send me someone to talk to.

[fatkish]

Funny (Y/N) x MHA

Inside the teachers lounge:

(Y/n): *looking at Aizawa from across their desks* choke me with your thighs daddy.

Aizawa: no

Vlad and Hizashi: *spits out drinks*

All Might: *chokes as blood spills from his mouth*

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All might: Is the plural of milf/dilf milfs/dilfs or milves/dilves?

Aizawa: Milfs.

(Y/n): Milf/dilf is an acronym, you can't change the spelling to milves/dilves.

All might: Wait, they're acronyms? What do they stand for???

Hizashi: Mom in late forties, dad in late fourties.

Hizashi: I learned that from the movie called M.I.L.F that I saw the trailer of in theaters probably 5 to 7 years ago.

(Y/n): Mom/dad I'd Love to Fuck.

All might: WAIT, WHAT THE FUCK—

All might: I NEVER REALIZED IT WAS ACTUALLY HORNY!

Hizashi: Oh, is it not mom in late fouries?

Aizawa: What? No! It isn't!

Hizashi: THE MOVIE TRAILER LIED TO ME!

(Y/n): Hizashi...

Hizashi: THIS IS WHY I DIDN'T THINK CALLING PEOPLE MILFS WAS ALL THAT BAD BECAUSE IT STOOD FOR SOMETHING HARMLESS IT JUST HAD A SLIGHTLY SEXUAL CONNOTATION!

(Y/n): I am entirely unsurprised that this is coming from you.

Hizashi: ALL MIGHT, DOES IT MAKE SENSE WHY I CALLED THE DIARY OF A WIMPY KID MOM A MILF NOW BECAUSE I THOUGHT IT WAS LITERALLY JUST A DESCRIPTOR WITH FUNNY CONNOTATION!

All might: The word milf has been ruined for me.

Aizawa: THAT'S ITS DEFINITION, IT CAN'T BE RUINED THAT'S WHAT IT MEANS!

(Y/n): Y'all are dumbasses.

——————————————————————————

Midnight: Subs are so fun to play with. All you have to do is hint at what you might do, back them into a corner with a look, or grab their wrist in a certain way and they're a wide-eyed mess.

Hizashi: What the fuck kind of Subway are you going to?

Aizawa: Substitute teachers deal with so much shit.

(Y/n): Guys

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All might: Whose turn is it to give the pep-talk?

(Y/n): *sighing* Aizawa.

Aizawa: Fuck shit up out there, but don’t die.

Hizashi: *wiping away a tear* So inspirational.

——————————————————————————

*Bakusquad is learning CPR on a test dummy*

(Y/n): So, assessing the situation. Are they breathing?

Kirishima: No, (Y/n). They are not breathing. And they have no arms or legs.

(Y/n): No, that’s not part of it—

Mina: Where are they? You know what? If we come across somebody with no arms or legs do we bother resuscitating them? I mean, what kind of quality of life do we have there?

Denki: I would want to live with no legs.

Bakugou: How about no arms? No arms or legs is basically how you exist right now, Sparky. You don’t do anything.

(Y/n): All right, well, lets get back to it. ‘Cause you’re losing him.

Kirishima: *pumps frantically*

(Y/n): Okay, too fast. Everyone, we need to pump at a pace of a 100 beats per minute.

Sero: Okay, that’s uh, hard to keep track. How many is that per hour?

Bakugou: How’s that gonna help you Tape arms?

Sero: I will divide and then count to it.

Bakugou: Right.

(Y/n): Okay. Well, a good trick is to pump to the tune of ‘Staying Alive’ by the Bee Gees. Do you know that song?

Denki: Yes, yes I do. I love that song. *clears throat, begins to sing* First I was afraid, I was petrified.

——————————————————————————

Y/n), on the phone: Uh. . Hey, Hizashi , i uh, I’ve been stabbed.

All Might: WHAT? WHERE ARE YOU?

(Y/n): Wait- You aren’t Hizashi . Sorry- I didn’t mean to call you-

All Might: NO, WHERE ARE YOU? IM COMING THERE. IM NOT GOING TO LEAVE SOMEONE ALONE THATS BEEN STABBED.

——————————————————————————

Aizawa: Your smug self-assuredness is revolting.

(Y/n): I think we need to validate self confidence more, lest you end up angry at others for having even a sliver of it. I've done nothing wrong and I have a heart of gold.

Vlad king: I think this message is extremely valid, but also (Y/n) has implied wanting to set off the Yellowstone supervolcano, so what's the truth?

(Y/n): I want to set it off.

——————————————————————————

(Y/n): Why are you like this??

Aizawa: I used too much "No More Tears" shampoo as a kid and I haven't felt a single emotion since.

——————————————————————————

Dabi: I'm trash.

(Y/n): As someone who's environmentally conscious, it's my duty to pick you up. Does 7 work for you?

Dabi:

Dabi: You smooth motherfucker.

Dabi: And yes it does.

——————————————————————————

(Y/n): Crushes are the worst. Whenever I’m near mine, I start acting stupid.

Aizawa: You always act stupid.

Aizawa:

Aizawa: Wait…

——————————————————————————

Twice: Why is everyone so obsessed with top or bottom? Honestly, I’d just be excited to have a bunk bed.

Dabi:

Dabi: I'm gonna tell them.

(Y/n): Don't you dare.

——————————————————————————

Toga: You really believe in (Y/n)?

Tomura: Luckily, they believe in themself enough for the both of us.

——————————————————————————

Kurogiri: I had to pick up (y/n) early.

Mr. Compress: That’s alright. Have they been sick?

Tomura: No, not sick, they’re just very upset because they’ve had a hard day.

Dabi: Wait, why did they have a hard day?

Tomura: They took their two pet snails to school with them today, and they had the snails in their book bag. They let out the snails by the sink in the back of the classroom for some exercise, and some kid, who was visiting the class that day, thought they were snails that had come inside from the playground, so they threw (y/n)’s snails out the window.

Dabi: Oh my god.

Kurogiri: I know you are laughing, guys, but please act sad about it when they get home today.

Dabi: I’ll try but that is hilarious.

Tomura: Yeah, I know. Stupid pet snails.

Tomura: I’m trying not to let (y/n) see me laugh.

——————————————————————————

(Y/n): Guys, I’ve been meaning to tell you… Aizawa and I are dating.

Nedzu, Hizashi, All Might, and Aizawa: *gasp*

(Y/n): Aizawa, why are you surprised?!

——————————————————————————

(Y/n), about Hizashi and Aizawa: My god, would you two just get a room already?

Aizawa: Excuse me, (Y/n)?

(Y/n): You both just keep agreeing about horrifying things and relishing everybody else's misery. So seriously, when's the wedding?

Hizashi: ...

Nedzu: I ship it!

All Might: CAN YOU NOT?

——————————————————————————

(Y/n): Which one of you was going to tell me that tea tastes different if you put it in hot water??

Nedzu: Y- you were putting it in cold water??

Aizawa: (Y/n). Answer the question, (Y/n).

(Y/n): Yeah??? I thought people just put it in hot water to speed up the tea-ification process. didn't realize there was an actual reason.

(Y/n): Plus you think I have the patience to boil water?

Nedzu: You don't have the patience to microwave water for 3 minutes??

Aizawa: Why are you putting it in the microwave to boil it?

Nedzu: Do you think I have the patience to boil water on the stove?

Aizawa: It takes less than a minute.

Nedzu: Is your stovetop powered by the fucking sun???

Aizawa: How long does it take you to boil a cup of water on the stove?

Nedzu: Like seven minutes??

All Might: Just stick the mug on top of the stove on medium heat and it boils in like 2 minutes... less than that if you use a saucepan!

Aizawa: Why are you putting the whole mug on the stove?? On medium heat?? All Might? Your stove is enchanted!

(Y/n): Every single person here is a fucking lunatic.

Hizashi: Do none of you own a fucking kettle?!

[gingerdraw-blog]

I got silly with the prompt generator AGAIN

TW Y/N IS HERE TOO AND THERE'S ALSO SHIPS LIKE LASERFROG AND RAYFROG (and also x reader AND JADE IS HERE TOO)(Y/N being a dumbass LIKE FR ITS STUPID) UMM SUGGESTIVE TOPICS???? YEAH YEAH SUGGESTIVE TOPICS

Ramon: I sleep with a gun under my pillow.

Y/N : I sleep with a knife.

Dolph: Both of you are pathetic.

Ramon: Oh yeah? What do you sleep with?

Dolph: Bullfrog

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Police: You’re under arrest for trying to carry three people on a single motorcycle.

Dolph, with Bullfrog and Ramon behind them: Wait, what do you mean THREE?!

Police: Yes…three.

Ramon: Oh, my God— What the fuck!?

Police: Wha-

Bullfrog: Y/N FUCKING FELL OFF!

------------------------------------------------------------------

Y/N : *sees Ramon and Bullfrog together*

Y/N : They're cute. I would put them on a boat.

Dolph: You mean... you ship them?

------------------------------------------------------------------

Ramon: Where is Y/N ?

Bullfrog : I'll do you one better, who is Y/N ??

Dolph: Here's a better question, why is Y/N ?

------------------------------------------------------------------

Ramon : Where's Dolph?

Y/N : Don't worry, I'll find them.

Y/N , shouting : Bullfrog sucks!

Dolph, distantly: Bullfrog is the best person ever! Fuck you!

Y/N : Found them.

------------------------------------------------------------------

(again but rayfrog version because I'm multishipper)

Dolph: Where's Ramon?

Y/N : Don't worry, I'll find them.

Y/N , shouting: Bullfrog sucks!

Ramon, distantly: Bullfrog is the best person ever! Fuck you!

Y/N : Found them.

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Ramon: Is the plural of milf/dilf milfs/dilfs or milves/dilves?

Y/N : Milfs.

Dolph: Milf/dilf is an acronym, you can't change the spelling to milves/dilves.

Ramon: Wait, they're acronyms? What do they stand for???

Jade : Mom in late forties, dad in late fourties.

Jade : I learned that from the movie called M.I.L.F that I saw the trailer of in theaters probably 5 to 7 years ago.

Dolph: Mom/dad I'd Love to Fuck.

Ramon: WAIT, WHAT THE FUCK—

Ramon: I NEVER REALIZED IT WAS ACTUALLY HORNY!

Jade : Oh, is it not mom in late fouries?

Y/N : What? No! It isn't!

Jade : THE MOVIE TRAILER LIED TO ME!

Dolph: Jade ...

Jade : THIS IS WHY I DIDN'T THINK CALLING PEOPLE MILFS WAS ALL THAT BAD BECAUSE IT STOOD FOR SOMETHING HARMLESS IT JUST HAD A SLIGHTLY SEXUAL CONNOTATION!

Dolph: I am entirely unsurprised that this is coming from you.

Jade : RAMON, DOES IT MAKE SENSE WHY I CALLED THE DIARY OF A WIMPY KID MOM A MILF NOW BECAUSE I THOUGHT IT WAS LITERALLY JUST A DESCRIPTOR WITH FUNNY CONNOTATION!

Ramon: The word milf has been ruined for me.

Y/N : THAT'S ITS DEFINITION, IT CAN'T BE RUINED THAT'S WHAT IT MEANS!

Dolph: Y'all are dumbasses.

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Y/N : It’s Christmas! Are you all in a Christmas mood?!

Bullfrog : Merry crisis.

Jade : Jingle bells, jingle bells, single all the way.

Ramon: Hoe hoe hoe.

Y/N : Guys, please.

------------------------------------------------------------------

Jade , writing in a letter: "I'm going to kick.. your... ass."

Jade : THERE. Now send it.

Ramon:: Dude, your handwriting's terrible, are you sure you want to-

Jade : JUST DO IT!

later

Y/N : So what does it say?

Dolph, reading the letter: They say they're going to "lick my...."

Y/N :

Dolph:

Y/N : Gross-

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Ramon: I spy with my little eye something that begins with the letter “s”.

Jade : *looks over at Y/N and Dolph* Jade : Is it “sexual tension”?

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Bullfrog : Is letting someone win at chess sapiosexual bottoming?

Y/N: Can everyone in this godforsaken group please learn the skill called "Think Before You Speak"?

Ramon : Ya know... it might be.

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Ramon , looking through their clothes: Has anyone seen my top?

Y/N: Bullfrog 's in the kitchen.

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Bullfrog , gardening: Hey, can you bring me the hoe?

Y/N: Yeah, sure.

*A few minutes later*

Y/N: Here you go.

Bullfrog :

Y/N:

Ramon : Why am I here?

------------------------------------------------------------------

Y/N: We need a diversion. I say Ramon gets naked.

Bullfrog : No.

Y/N: I could get naked.

The squad: NO!!!

------------------------------------------------------------------

Bullfrog : What did Ramon do this time?

Y/N: More like WHO did Ramon do this time?

------------------------------------------------------------------

Y/N: I'm gonna eat the chicken breasts!

Ramon , snickering: Yeah, eat what you lack.

Bullfrog , deadpanning at Ramon : Then maybe I should order brains on delivery for you.

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Bullfrog : How do you tell someone that you wanna have sex with them in a polite way?

Ramon : Excuse me Mx. Would you give me the honours of indulging in sexual activities with you?

Y/N: What the fuck is wrong with you two?

------------------------------------------------------------------

Y/N: Thank you all for coming.

Bullfrog , wearing a hospital gown: When I heard you couldn't get laid, I dropped everything and came straight here.

Y/N: Well, I couldn't imagine anyone else being part of the "Fuck Y/N Task Force".

Ramon : Yeah, I interpreted that in a different way.

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Y/N: Smart is attractive. Educate me on something I don't know!

Ramon : The mouth of a jellyfish is also an anus.

Y/N: Stop.

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Bullfrog : Are you trying to seduce me?

Y/N: Why, are you seducible?

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Ramon : I’m proud to identify as morosexual. I’m attracted to dumbasses and dumbasses exclusively. Someone asked me what the Spanish word for "tortilla" was once, and now I dream of kissing them under the moonlight.

Y/N: What kind of animal is the Pink Panther?

Ramon , already taking off their clothes: God, Y/N, you’re so fucking stupid.

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Ramon : Two brooooos!

Y/N: Chillin' in a hot tub!

Ramon : Five feet apart 'cause we're not gay!

Y/N:

Ramon :

Y/N: *tearing up*

Ramon : Babe, c'mon...

Y/N: AND HERE YOU REALLY HAD ME THINKING WE HAD SOMETHING.

Ramon : Babe...

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Y/N: The stars are so beautiful...

Ramon : They're just giant balls of gas.

Y/N: You know what, if you're just going to ruin this, then-

Ramon : And yet none of them are as huge as my love for you.

Y/N: Oh...

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[cherrilemon]

Hotch: Is the plural of milf/dilf milfs/dilfs or milves/dilves?

Emily: Milf

Spencer: Milf/dilf is an acronym, you can't change the spelling to milves/dilves

Hotch: Wait, they're acronyms? What do they stand for???

Rossi: Mom in late forties, dad in late fourties

Rossi: I learned that from the movie called M.I.L.F that I saw the trailer of in theaters probably 5 to 7 years ago

Spencer: Mom/dad I'd Love to Fuck

Hotch: WAIT, WHAT THE FUCK—

Hotch: I NEVER REALIZED IT WAS ACTUALLY HORNY!

Rossi: Oh, is it not mom in late fouries?

Emily: What? No! It isn't!

Rossi: THE MOVIE TRAILER LIED TO ME!

Emily: Rossi...

Rossi: THIS IS WHY I DIDN'T THINK CALLING PEOPLE MILFS WAS ALL THAT BAD BECAUSE IT STOOD FOR SOMETHING HARMLESS IT JUST HAD A SLIGHTLY SEXUAL CONNOTATION!

Emily: I am entirely unsurprised that this is coming from you

Rossi: HOTCH, DOES IT MAKE SENSE WHY I CALLED THE DIARY OF A WIMPY KID MOM A MILF NOW BECAUSE I THOUGHT IT WAS LITERALLY JUST A DESCRIPTOR WITH FUNNY CONNOTATION!

Hotch: The word milf has been ruined for me

Spencer: THAT'S ITS DEFINITION, IT CAN'T BE RUINED THAT'S WHAT IT MEANS!

Emily: Y'all are dumbasses

[seakicker]

MS JUJU omg, just Childe casually going “dude you don’t remember? That’s the chick who we fucked stupid and spit roasted in college” and Diluc going “ah.” You’re so big brained, driving me crazy

i guarantee childe would make some comment about how women, just like wine, only get better with age before looking to diluc for further support— maybe the latter would be able to comment on the validity of childe’s statement if he weren’t currently occupied simultaneously reliving that night in college over 25 years ago and processing the fact that you’re standing here right in front of him. of course you were sexy then in your tiny little club dress your sorority friend surely picked out for you and your hair styled a way neither of them had seen on you before, but the you that stands before childe and diluc right here, right now with an additional 25 years of life under her belt? maybe childe actually knows what he’s talking about for once when he says soft, mature women are a lot more beautiful than flustered and inexperienced college girls.

neither of them have seen you in the 25 years following that drunken one-night stand, but now they both wish they had kept up with you at least a little since graduation and the subsequent emergence into the workforce. your soft body and widened hips certainly suggest you’ve had children and created a family of your own, but the absence of a ring on your left hand makes them wonder if a husband is in the picture at all— not that it would make a difference to the three of you. diluc’s the most likely to have reservations about fucking a married woman, but childe wouldn’t miss a beat in pointing out that you being taken certainly didn’t stop the two of them 25 years ago. hell, given the opportunity, the two of them probably would have fucked you right in front of whatever boyfriend you had then and they’d certainly do it in front of whatever boyfriend or husband you have now. you deserve real men (emphasis on the plural ‘men’— don’t gorgeous MILFs like you deserve to get spoiled by multiple cocks at once?), they figure, and any guy who’d let you run off to a bar alone like this clearly doesn’t seem to mind sharing. childe and diluc are exceptional at sharing, so it all works out, doesn’t it?

[soyourethatanderson]

Knox: Is the plural of milf/dilf milfs/dilfs or milves/dilves? Todd: Milfs. Todd: Milf/dilf is an acronym, you can't change the spelling to milves/dilves. Knox: Wait, they're acronyms? What do they stand for??? Neil: Mom in late forties, dad in late forties. Neil: I learned that from the movie called M.I.L.F that I saw the trailer of in theaters probably 5 to 7 years ago. Charlie: Mom/dad I'd Love to Fuck. Knox: WAIT, WHAT THE FUCK— Knox: I NEVER REALIZED IT WAS ACTUALLY HORNY! Neil: Oh, is it not mom in late forties? Charlie: What? No! It isn't! Neil: THE MOVIE TRAILER LIED TO ME! Todd: Neil... Neil: THIS IS WHY I DIDN'T THINK CALLING PEOPLE MILFS WAS ALL THAT BAD BECAUSE IT STOOD FOR SOMETHING HARMLESS IT JUST HAD A SLIGHTLY SEXUAL CONNOTATION! Charlie: I am entirely unsurprised that this is coming from you. Neil: KNOX, DOES IT MAKE SENSE WHY I CALLED THE DIARY OF A WIMPY KID MOM A MILF NOW BECAUSE I THOUGHT IT WAS LITERALLY JUST A DESCRIPTOR WITH FUNNY CONNOTATION! Knox: The word milf has been ruined for me. Charlie: THAT'S ITS DEFINITION, IT CAN'T BE RUINED THAT'S WHAT IT MEANS! Todd: You're all are dumbasses.

[bitchystxrk3000]

Peter 1= Tom’s Peter

Peter 2= Tobey’s Peter

Peter 3= Andrew’s Peter

Peter 3: Is the plural of milf/dilf milfs/dilfs or milves/dilves?

Peter 1: Milfs.

Peter 2: Milf/dilf is an acronym, you can't change the spelling to milves/dilves.

Peter 3 : Wait, they're acronyms? What do they stand for???

Y/N: Mom in late forties, dad in late fourties.

Y/N: I learned that from the movie called M.I.L.F that I saw the trailer of in theaters probably 5 to 7 years ago.

Peter 2: Mom/dad I'd Love to Fuck.

Peter 3 : WAIT, WHAT THE FUCK—

Peter 3 : I NEVER REALIZED IT WAS ACTUALLY HORNY!

Y/N: Oh, is it not mom in late fouries?

Peter 1: What? No! It isn't!

Y/N: THE MOVIE TRAILER LIED TO ME!

Peter 2: Y/N...

Y/N: THIS IS WHY I DIDN'T THINK CALLING PEOPLE MILFS WAS ALL THAT BAD BECAUSE IT STOOD FOR SOMETHING HARMLESS IT JUST HAD A SLIGHTLY SEXUAL CONNOTATION!

Peter 2: I am entirely unsurprised that this is coming from you.

Y/N: PETER 3 , DOES IT MAKE SENSE WHY I CALLED THE DIARY OF A WIMPY KID MOM A MILF NOW BECAUSE I THOUGHT IT WAS LITERALLY JUST A DESCRIPTOR WITH FUNNY CONNOTATION!

Peter 3 : The word milf has been ruined for me.

Peter 1: THAT'S ITS DEFINITION, IT CAN'T BE RUINED THAT'S WHAT IT MEANS!

Peter 2: Y'all are dumbasses.

[0lympian-c0uncil]

Artemis: Is the plural of milf/dilf milfs/dilfs or milves/dilves?

Apollo: Milfs.

Athena: Milf/dilf is an acronym, you can't change the spelling to milves/dilves.

Ares: Wait, they're acronyms? What do they stand for???

Apollo: Mom in late forties, dad in late forties.

Apollo: I learned that from the movie called M.I.L.F that I saw the trailer of in theaters probably 5 to 7 years ago.

Artemis: Mom/dad I'd Love to Fuck.

Ares: WAIT, WHAT THE FUCK—

Ares: I NEVER REALIZED IT WAS ACTUALLY HORNY!

Apollo: Oh, is it not mom in late fories?

Athena: What? No! It isn't!

Apollo: THE MOVIE TRAILER LIED TO ME!

Athena: Apollo...

Apollo: THIS IS WHY I DIDN'T THINK CALLING PEOPLE MILFS WAS ALL THAT BAD BECAUSE IT STOOD FOR SOMETHING HARMLESS IT JUST HAD A SLIGHTLY SEXUAL CONNOTATION!

Artemis: I am entirely unsurprised that this is coming from you.

Apollo: ARES, DOES IT MAKE SENSE WHY I CALLED THE DIARY OF A WIMPY KID MOM A MILF NOW BECAUSE I THOUGHT IT WAS LITERALLY JUST A DESCRIPTOR WITH FUNNY CONNOTATION!

Ares: The word milf has been ruined for me.

Artemis: THAT'S ITS DEFINITION, IT CAN'T BE RUINED THAT'S WHAT IT MEANS!

Athena: Y'all are dumbasses.

[incorrect-drwho-quotes]

Doctor: Is the plural of milf/dilf milfs/dilfs or milves/dilves? Simm!Master: Milfs. Jack: Milf/dilf is an acronym, you can't change the spelling to milves/dilves. Doctor: Wait, they're acronyms? What do they stand for??? Clara: Mom in late forties, dad in late fourties. Clara: I learned that from the movie called M.I.L.F that I saw the trailer of in theaters probably 5 to 7 years ago. Jack: Mom/dad I'd Love to Fuck. Doctor: WAIT, WHAT THE FUCK— Doctor: I NEVER REALIZED IT WAS ACTUALLY HORNY! Clara: Oh, is it not mom in late fouries? Simm!Master: What? No! It isn't! Clara: THE MOVIE TRAILER LIED TO ME! Jack: Clara... Clara: THIS IS WHY I DIDN'T THINK CALLING PEOPLE MILFS WAS ALL THAT BAD BECAUSE IT STOOD FOR SOMETHING HARMLESS IT JUST HAD A SLIGHTLY SEXUAL CONNOTATION! Jack: I am entirely unsurprised that this is coming from you. Clara: DOCTOR, DOES IT MAKE SENSE WHY I CALLED THE DIARY OF A WIMPY KID MOM A MILF NOW BECAUSE I THOUGHT IT WAS LITERALLY JUST A DESCRIPTOR WITH FUNNY CONNOTATION! Doctor: The word milf has been ruined for me. Simm!Master: THAT'S ITS DEFINITION, IT CAN'T BE RUINED THAT'S WHAT IT MEANS! Jack: Y'all are dumbasses.

[ravenclawh0re18]

Juliette: Is the plural of milf/dilf milfs/dilfs or milves/dilves? Nazeera: Milfs. Nazeera: Milf/dilf is an acronym, you can't change the spelling to milves/dilves. Juliette: Wait, they're acronyms? What do they stand for??? Kenji: Mom in late forties, dad in late fourties. Kenji: I learned that from the movie called M.I.L.F that I saw the trailer of in theaters probably 5 to 7 years ago. Nazeera: Mom/dad I'd Love to Fuck. Juliette: WAIT, WHAT THE FUCK— Juliette: I NEVER REALIZED IT WAS ACTUALLY HORNY! Kenji: Oh, is it not mom in late fouries? Nazeera: What? No! It isn't! Kenji: THE MOVIE TRAILER LIED TO ME! Nazeera: Kenji… Kenji: THIS IS WHY I DIDN'T THINK CALLING PEOPLE MILFS WAS ALL THAT BAD BECAUSE IT STOOD FOR SOMETHING HARMLESS IT JUST HAD A SLIGHTLY SEXUAL CONNOTATION! Warner: I am entirely unsurprised that this is coming from you. Kenji: Juliette, DOES IT MAKE SENSE WHY I CALLED THE DIARY OF A WIMPY KID MOM A MILF NOW BECAUSE I THOUGHT IT WAS LITERALLY JUST A DESCRIPTOR WITH FUNNY CONNOTATION! Juliette: The word milf has been ruined for me. Nazeera: THAT'S ITS DEFINITION, IT CAN'T BE RUINED THAT'S WHAT IT MEANS! Warner: * looking at all of them questioning his entire existence*

[hubristicassholefight]

Funniest comments so far

huge spider (inherently fuckable) (this was on the Other Mother from Coraline)

Someone just submitted the Whore of Bablyon

The qualifications for the Xenomorph queen just being “dude come on”

“I don’t know what sea slug pussy is like but I’m going to find out”

Additional notes that are just “ WOMAN “

shes also a realtor which is an objectively evil job

“i dont like that you pluraled milf as milves”  (Cope)

[sungieimagines]

hyunjin: is the plural of milf/dilf milfs/dilfs or milves/dilves?

chan: milfs.

jeongin: milf/dilf is an acronym, you can't change the spelling to milves/dilves.

hyunjin: wait, they're acronyms? what do they stand for???

felix: mum in late forties, dad in late fourties.

felix: i learned that from the movie called M.I.L.F that i saw the trailer of in theaters probably 5 to 7 years ago.

jeongin: Mum/dad I'd Love to Fuck.

hyunjin: WAIT, WHAT THE FUCK—

hyunjin: I NEVER REALIZED IT WAS ACTUALLY HORNY!

felix: oh, is it not mom in late fouries?

chan: what? no! it isn't!

felix: THE MOVIE TRAILER LIED TO ME!

jeongin: felix...

felix: THIS IS WHY I DIDN'T THINK CALLING PEOPLE MILFS WAS ALL THAT BAD BECAUSE IT STOOD FOR SOMETHING HARMLESS IT JUST HAD A SLIGHTLY SEXUAL CONNOTATION!

jeongin: i am entirely unsurprised that this is coming from you.

felix: HYUNJIN, DOES IT MAKE SENSE WHY I CALLED THE DIARY OF A WIMPY KID MOM A MILF NOW BECAUSE I THOUGHT IT WAS LITERALLY JUST A DESCRIPTOR WITH FUNNY CONNOTATION!

hyunjin: the word milf has been ruined for me.

chan: THAT'S ITS DEFINITION, IT CAN'T BE RUINED THAT'S WHAT IT MEANS!

jeongin: y’all are dumbasses.

[emlovesstates]

California: Oklahoma, what do you call people you go out with but don’t try to sleep with?

Oklahoma: ...People?

----/-----

Oklahoma: If it’s any consolation, they got me here on a very misleading text message.

California: Technically, you are about to be screwed in the biology room.

-----

Oklahoma: I committed all 7 deadly sins in 30 minutes.

California: Wow, I've gotta hear this.

Oklahoma: I was angry and envious of my neighbor so I lazily seduced his wife and ate all his groceries and didn't share.

California: You forgot pride.

Oklahoma: No, I'm pretty proud of this.

---

Oklahoma: Hey, wanna take a shower with me?

California: I have a gun in that nightstand beside the bed. If I ever say no to that question, I want you to take it out and shot me because I’ve obviously gone crazy.

-----

Oklahoma: Bro, I had a dream we fucked.

California: Bro, relax it was just a dream.

Oklahoma: Huh, gay, I wouldn’t fuck you.

California: You wouldn’t?

Oklahoma: I mean, unless you want to-

------

Oklahoma: What’s sexting?

California: I'm not having this conversation with you.

---

California: Know why I called you in here?

Oklahoma: Because I accidentally sent you a dick pic.

California: *Stops pouring two glasses of wine.* Accidentally?

-----

Oklahoma: Look, last night was a mistake.

California: A sexy mistake.

Oklahoma: No, just a regular mistake.

------

Oklahoma: There are 20 letters in the alphabet, right?

California: Nope, there's 26.

Oklahoma: Ah, I must have forgotten U, R, A, Q, T.

California: Aww, that's cute, but you're still missing one.

Oklahoma: You'll get the D later ;).

-

Oklahoma, turning to California: Stop calling yourself hot, the only thing you can turn on is the microwave.

---

Oklahoma: We should get you to a doctor for a check up immediately. What if it happens again, and there isn’t anyone around to help you? What if it’s congenital? Oh my God! Was it me? Did I hurt you?

California: …You realize any other person that made their partner pass out on bed would simply feel really proud of themselves,

------

California: New York , you'll be working with Georgia and Oklahoma.

New York : Alright! My fantasy threesome!

Everyone else: *blank stares*

New York : ...Of people on a team.

------

New York , writing in a letter: "I'm going to kick.. your... ass."

New York : THERE. Now send it.

Oklahoma:: Dude, your handwriting's terrible, are you sure you want to-

New York : JUST DO IT!

later

California: So what does it say?

Georgia , reading the letter: They say they're going to "lick my...."

California:

Georgia :

California: Gross-

----

Oklahoma: Is the plural of milf/dilf milfs/dilfs or milves/dilves?

Georgia : Milfs.

New York : Milf/dilf is an acronym, you can't change the spelling to milves/dilves.

Oklahoma: Wait, they're acronyms? What do they stand for???

California: Mom in late forties, dad in late fourties.

California: I learned that from the movie called M.I.L.F that I saw the trailer of in theaters probably 5 to 7 years ago.

New York : Mom/dad I'd Love to Fuck.

Oklahoma: WAIT, WHAT THE FUCK—

Oklahoma: I NEVER REALIZED IT WAS ACTUALLY HORNY!

California: Oh, is it not mom in late fouries?

Georgia : What? No! It isn't!

California: THE MOVIE TRAILER LIED TO ME!

New York : California...

California: THIS IS WHY I DIDN'T THINK CALLING PEOPLE MILFS WAS ALL THAT BAD BECAUSE IT STOOD FOR SOMETHING HARMLESS IT JUST HAD A SLIGHTLY SEXUAL CONNOTATION!

New York : I am entirely unsurprised that this is coming from you.

California: OKLAHOMA, DOES IT MAKE SENSE WHY I CALLED THE DIARY OF A WIMPY KID MOM A MILF NOW BECAUSE I THOUGHT IT WAS LITERALLY JUST A DESCRIPTOR WITH FUNNY CONNOTATION!

Oklahoma: The word milf has been ruined for me.

Georgia : THAT'S ITS DEFINITION, IT CAN'T BE RUINED THAT'S WHAT IT MEANS!

New York : Y'all are dumbasses.

-----

Oklahoma: So anyways have y'all seen New York ?

California: I think they went in Georgia 's room 'studying'.

Florida : Doubt that. I heard groans there.

*Meanwhile in Georgia 's room*

New York & Georgia , fighting:

-------

California: Isn’t it weird that we can’t ride any other animal except horses. Like if horses weren’t a thing, humans would be fucked cause we couldn’t ride any other animals. Like riding animals wouldn’t really be a thing. We should probably be more grateful to horses.

Florida : Elephants.

California: Blocked.

New York : Camels.

California: Extra blocked.

Georgia : Donkeys.

California: Ultra blocked.

Oklahoma: That dick.

California: ...Followed.

Or

Georgia : Isn’t it weird that we can’t ride any other animal except horses. Like if horses weren’t a thing, humans would be fucked cause we couldn’t ride any other animals. Like riding animals wouldn’t really be a thing. We should probably be more grateful to horses.

California: Elephants.

Georgia : Blocked.

Florida : Camels.

Georgia : Extra blocked.

Oklahoma: Donkeys.

Georgia : Ultra blocked.

New York : That dick.

Georgia : ...Followed.

----

California: If you had too, what would you give up food or sex?

New York : Sex.

Oklahoma: Seriously, answer faster.

New York : I’m sorry honey, when they said sex I wasn’t thinking about sex with you.

Oklahoma: It’s like a giant hug.

California: Georgia , what about you? What would you give up sex or food?

Georgia : Food.

California: Okay, how about sex or dinosaurs?

Georgia : Oh my God it’s like the movie Sophie’s Choice.

Florida : What about you Louisiana? What would you give up sex or food?

Louisiana: Oh... um... I don’t know, it’s too hard.

Florida : No, you gotta pick one.

Louisiana: Um, food... no, sex... no, food... sex... food. Ugh! I don’t know! I want both! I- I want hot people on bread!

---

Cali : Florida kissed me!

New York : Oh my God! Oh my God! Oh my God!

Cali : It was unbelievable!

New York : Oh my God! Oh my God! Oh my God!

Louisiana: Okay, we wanna hear everything. New York , get the wine and unplug the phone. Cali , does this end well or do we need tissues?

Cali : Oh, it ended very well.

New York : Do not start without me! Do not start without me!

Louisiana: Okay, alright, let’s hear about the kiss. Was it a soft brush against your lips or was it like a, you know, “I gotta have you now” kind of thing?

Cali : Well, at first it was really intense, you know? And then, oh God, and then we just sort of sunk into it.

Louisiana: Ohh... So, okay, were they holding you? Or were their hands on your back?

Cali : First they started out on my waist and then they slid up and then they were in my hair.

New York and Louisiana: Ohhh.

*meanwhile*

Florida eating pizza in their house: And, uh, and then I kissed them.

Gov : Tongue?

Florida: Yeah.

Texas: Cool.

------

New York: Where's Oklahoma, California, and Georgia?

undefined: They're playing hide and seek.

New York: Where?

New Jersey: I don't think you get how this game works.

[the-faketiccit0by]

Ruin: Is the plural of milf/dilf milfs/dilfs or milves/dilves?

Eclipse: Milfs

Solar: Milf/dilf is an acronym, you can't change the spelling to milves/dilves

Ruin: Wait, they're acronyms? What do they stand for???

Jigsaw: Mom in late forties, dad in late fourties. Jigsaw: I learned that from the movie called M.I.L.F that I saw the trailer of in theaters probably 5 to 7 years ago

Solar: Mom/dad I'd Love to Fuck

Ruin: WAIT, WHAT THE FUCK— Ruin: I NEVER REALIZED IT WAS ACTUALLY HORNY!

Jigsaw: Oh, is it not mom in late fouries?

Eclipse: What? No! It isn't!

Jigsaw: THE MOVIE TRAILER LIED TO ME!

Solar: Jigsaw...

Jigsaw: THIS IS WHY I DIDN'T THINK CALLING PEOPLE MILFS WAS ALL THAT BAD BECAUSE IT STOOD FOR SOMETHING HARMLESS IT JUST HAD A SLIGHTLY SEXUAL CONNOTATION!

Solar: I am entirely unsurprised that this is coming from you

Jigsaw: RUIN, DOES IT MAKE SENSE WHY I CALLED THE DIARY OF A WIMPY KID MOM A MILF NOW BECAUSE I THOUGHT IT WAS LITERALLY JUST A DESCRIPTOR WITH FUNNY CONNOTATION!

Ruin: The word milf has been ruined for me

Eclipse: THAT'S ITS DEFINITION, IT CAN'T BE RUINED THAT'S WHAT IT MEANS!

Solar: Y'all are dumbasses

[amyyythestarry]

Mitsuba: Is the plural of milf/dilf milfs/dilfs or milves/dilves?

Natsuhiko: Milfs.

Sakura: Milf/dilf is an acronym, you can't change the spelling to milves/dilves.

Mitsuba: Wait, they're acronyms? What do they stand for???

Tsukasa: Mom in late 40s, dad in late 40s.

Tsukasa: I learned that from the movie called M.I.L.F that I saw the trailer of in theaters probably 10 or 20 years ago. ( He got the years wrong again )

Natsuhiko: Mom/Dad I'd Love to F**k.

Mitsuba: WAIT, WHAT THE F**K-

Mitsuba: I NEVER REALIZED IT WAS ACTUALLY H*RNY!

Tsukasa: Oh, is it not mom in late 40s?

Natsuhiko: What? No! It isn't!

Tsukasa: THE MOVIE TRAILER LIED TO ME!

Sakura: Tsukasa…

Tsukasa: THIS IS WHY I DIDN'T THINK CALLING PEOPLE MILFS WAS ALL THAT BAD BECAUSE IT STOOD FOR SOMETHING HARMLESS IT JUST HAD A SLIGHTLY SEXUAL CONNOTATION!

Sakura: I am entirely unsurprised that this is coming from you.

Tsukasa: NATSUHIKO, DOES IT MAKE SENSE WHY I CALLED THE DIARY OF A WIMPY KID MOM A MILF NOW BECAUSE I THOUGHT IT WAS LITERALLY JUST A DESCRIPTOR WITH FUNNY CONNOTATION!

Mitsuba: The word milf has been ruined for me.

Tsukasa: THAT'S ITS DEFINITION, IT CAN'T BE RUINED THAT'S WHAT IT MEANS!

Natsuhiko: Y'all are dumba**es.