#You're such a special person and a one of a kind

[identitty-dickruption]

when abled people talk about employability + disability I don't think they entirely understand the domino effect of unemployment/underemployment that can happen in a disabled person's life

the kinds of jobs that are considered 'unskilled' or 'entry level' are inaccessible for various reasons (e.g. involve having to stand up for long periods of time)

the time in your life when many people are expected to start working these entry level jobs is while you're still in school. the sheer exhaustion of school means that even when those jobs aren't completely inaccessible, many disabled people simply do not have the energy to do them

without any work experience, it's very hard to get work. the kinds of jobs that tend to have more accessible workplaces are either not entry-level or require a certain level of education to enter them. also without having gone through a hiring process before, it's very hard to even know what to expect from a job, which only creates additional barriers

even if you do have work experience, being disabled is not really taken as a valid reason to have gaps in your resume, which means you immediately look like a suspicious/risky hire to a HR department

disabled people, once we do have jobs, are more likely to be underemployed than abled people, meaning that we have fewer opportunities to demonstrate our skills in the workplace, and are less likely to be able to accumulate a back catalogue of good references to take with us in the 'getting a new job' mission. this itself keeps us underemployed

NOT to mention the fact that the exact same process can happen with respect to education (the being in special ed -> being able to go to university pipeline is basically non-existent. and if it is there, it is very hard to navigate). I'm not sure yet another 'employable skills program' can get us out of this one, chief

[presepohne]

nsfw. simon ghost riley but like walk with me down this.

simon riley who has been such a big person in your life, always there for you and like a father figure or just like those seniors/people whom you'd never disappoint. it's like a very good platonic relation and you enjoy his company as much as he does yours.

simon riley, your lieutenant who is grumpy to everyone but you. he has a special soft spot for you in every sense— let's keep the romantic out of it. it's not really romantic but more of a bond you both can't fucking out a name on. whatever it is, it's tension less and more like a mentor turned very good friend.

you go out for drinks with the team, and everyone gets shit faced drunk— which ends up with you hooking up with simon. it's really more like an accident, but really you didn't think it would affect you so much that when you wake up with your face pressed against his neck and his arms around your waist— you're literally so fucking confused how did you end up here.

when you try to pry away, slowly pull away, feeling as if you breached a boundary— simon pulls you back in, lips on your forehead muttering how warm you are and you will get cold.

except this man wakes up and is in a full blown panicked state that he slept with you. it's in his body language, not words or actions, but the stiffness that he carries around and is avoiding you unlike the other days. it's harrowing. you know? that kind daunting feeling where you feel like your failed life by pushing that one guardian whom you wanted to make proud.

now you both are tip toeing around each other, and johnny and gaz are having the best time in their life, because the tension is better than those stupid shows on the telly and price is having a mid-life crisis on team morale.

all because you and your lieutenant fucked.

[crunchystarz]

Hello! Yesterday (the 20th) was my 17th birthday, and I wanted to know how the house wardens would celebrate the reader's birthday. Feel free to ignore if you have done this in the past or don't feel like doing this one, no pressure!

How each of the housewardens celebrate your birthday hcs

Housewardens x GN!reader

CW: none just some short and fluffy headcanons, could be read as platonic or romantic

A/N: going to admit this is way shorter and way goofier than my usual stuff but we deserve a lil fun around here okay, I got to this a lil late lol but I get to post it on Kalims birthday so yay also happy late birthday anon I hope you enjoy (⁠人⁠ ⁠•͈⁠ᴗ⁠•͈⁠)

Riddle Rosehearts

*Riddle knows every birthday so of course that includes you. He was the first to wish you a happy birthday. Of course in typical Riddle fashion he was as formal and respectful as could be even if it was just a happy birthday.

* Riddle was in charge of setting up your party, it would be out of tradition if you didn't hold a party correct? So of course he set up a birthday party for you like he would an unbirthday party.

* He definitely makes sure everything is according to your liking and preferences no exceptions. He wants everything to go smoothly just for you and your big day. He even helped bake the cake with Trey (he got kicked out of the kitchen)

*Genuinely was stumped on what to give you and he even went to Cater for help. Thankfully his cheerful upperclassmen knew what might peak your interest.

* Riddle is all about rules so now you have to awkwardly sit as he has everyone sing you happy birthday because rules are rules. Sevens bless your soul

Leona Kingscholar

*Doesn't make a huge deal and throws you a casual "Happy Birthday" Doesn't mean he won't make you feel special by any means. It's your day and he'll make sure you enjoy it.

* Leona is the kind of guy who pretends to forget your birthday then brings in your gift immediately after. Speaking of gifts Leona isn't one to care enough to flex his money he won't get you anything super expensive but instead something that really means something to you.

*He won't throw you anything big like a party but he'll definitely hang around you all day "just cus" He'll offer to go out on the town or just to chill out in his dorm. Stealing you away from those loud mouths and giving you some peace and quiet. That's what he claims anywho.

*He's overall casual about it as he is most things but he still wants you to feel loved and appreciated so he does all the small things that'll make your day any better.

*A nice nap would be nice right? Come on relax you deserve it. Dragging you down to nap with him later in the evening.

Azul Ashengrotto

* Azul would try and offer you something nice either that being having the tweels be your personal butlers for the day(depending on Floyd's mood this Is either hell or a fun lil field trip) or he'll allow you to host a party at monstro longue free of charge. Not everything he does is for personal gain.

* Azul o sweet Azul had already planned out your present in advance. Deep behind his persona we all know he's just an awkward guy, he'd be so embarrassed and would feel a bit guilty if he didn't get you something you 100% liked. Thank you Jade for the research

*Constantly checking on you and everything going on because he has a reputation to uphold people!!(He just wants you to have a good birthday shhh)

Kalim Al Asim

*A big party.It's Kalim and what's one thing Kalim is known for? Parties, trust and believe he's going all out despite if you like big patties or not. He puts way too much time into planning it but at least you know he cares. It's like the complete opposite of Leona. Anything but chill and casual.

*He gives you way too many expensive gifts, could you even accept these? So much gold...damn nepo baby You're grateful nonetheless.

*Kalim makes sure Jamil makes all your favorite foods. He even offered to help but Jamil immediately shoots dow the idea of him being in the kitchen while he's working.

*Malik is following you around all day like a puppy he just wants to spend time with you honestly. It is your special day after all

*Magic carpet ride. Why? Because he wants to show you a whole new world (wink wink nudge nudge). Plus the sky is the best place to see the sunset. It'll be something to relax after a very hyper birthday.

Vil Schönheit

*You honestly think Vil forgot your birthday because he was so unusually quiet that it was until Rook is dragging you into a part of Pomefiore you haven't seen before and. SURPRISE!

*You didn't take Vil as one for surprises but here he is. A surprise birthday party just for you. Vil tells you to relax that he'll handle everything.

*Vil kinda guy to give you one of those gift baskets for your birthday and I've been standing of this thought since forever. Its full of your favorite things...and his skin care products.

*I also like the Idea of Vil treating you to a Spa day for your birthday. Again just relax and let Vil take care of you.

Idia shroud

*It takes so much effort for Idia to go outside and tell you happy birthday in person that's a birthday present in itself. He was just going to shoot you a happy birthday text and have Ortho give you the present he got you for him but he likes you too much so he supposed he could tell you in person...

*He is so awkward when giving you his gift you basically had to just take it from him because he was so scared you wouldn't like it or it wasn't going to be good enough. But he's so smug when you tell him you like it. Of course you'd like he Idia knows his player 2 more than anyone (he was terrified)

*On how he'd actually celebrate your birthday, he'd realistically do something super chill and preferably just the two of you like a movie night or just gaming. He's spending time with you regardless.

*He tries really hard to make it super special even if you two don't do much.

Malleus Draconia

*Malleus is so dramatic about your birthday. He's not Kalim dramatic but he almost gets there. There's no big party or anything but he's all over you.

*Like if he could actually work a phone like a normal person you'd get a text the second it strikes midnight with a really dramatic happy birthday text.(That or an ominous ass gif ) I Instead he's knocking at your window just to say happy birthday.

*A Picnic for your birthday is just so cute and simple and I think it's a Malleus thing to do. He'd do more but he was going over things with Lilia and according to this is the most tame thing on that list.

*Gift wise I think he'd give you a gem of some kind. He's a dragon fae and I feel like he'd give you something shiny like that as a birthday gift.

MASTERLIST

[rivereverie]

Just some observations on Astarion learning to see that he is loved

I just saw a clip of Astarion's response to his partner cheating on him with Mizora and it got me thinking. While his entire reaction is very telling and meaningful in its entirety, one line stood out to me:

"I really thought there was more to you. That you were better than other people"

This was striking because it immediately reminded me of something else he says, in the scene after his siblings attempt to capture and return him to Cazador:

"You're the only one. Other people don't have a heart like you. You're you. No one is like that."

These lines feel a little odd at first, because Astarion isn't known for putting the PC on a pedestal. I don't think that's exactly what he's doing here. I think these lines are just capturing the inner chaos and contradiction that naturally come with the gradual unraveling of a long-held worldview. At this point, Astarion is able to process that one person cares for and accepts him, but only one. They must be an outlier: an exception to the rule. Surely they're something special.

Obviously this isn't true, though, and the next step is for him to learn that the PC isn't actually unique in their ability to accept and care for him him. In fact, Astarion is already loved by others and just doesn't see it. This line of his is beautifully contrasted by Karlach's reaction to Astarion's near-abduction. She is righteously angry and protective because she loves Astarion too.

"I dare Cazador to sent more lackeys our way. This is our territory. I'll crack anyone who tries to come into my house and hurt my people."

Earlier in the story, we get a similar moment during the confession scene, showing again how Astarion isn't always able to see the truth of what others feel for him.

When he says this, he sounds surprised. Like the idea of a friend is a revelation. This kind of broke my heart when I first heard it, because I thought it was obvious to him that he already had friends, in both the other companions and my character. But I think a part of him genuinely was stuck in that old thought pattern of assuming that anyone who showed interest in him just wanted to use him. This also makes it clear just how divorced sex is from affection in his mind and experience. Though they've slept together at least several times and grown more emotionally intimate too, Astarion still needs confirmation that the PC actually cares for him.

I made a post once about the two triggers for Astarion's confession here, which further reveal his mindset: going out of your way and into danger to get his scars translated, or choosing not to force him into complying with Araj's dehumanizing demands. Both of these things are concrete demonstrations of respect and care for him and what he wants. Astarion knows very well how empty words can be, so actions are what finally help him believe that the PC cares about him, and gives him the impetus to confess.

Later, If you break up with Astarion, his reaction is extremely telling in that he regresses slightly from this healthier mindset he had developed:

"I can hardly blame you. I don't exactly have much to offer right now, beyond new burdens to carry."

Typically, we witness any traces of Astarion's self-deprecation filtered through irony or dark humor, so his vulnerability in this moment is stark.

He claims that he has very little to offer, but that just isn't true. He may be going through a bit of a crisis, but he is still a shockingly good partner given the circumstances. He is unwaveringly supportive, caring, and clearly tries to lighten his partner's emotional load when they begin to feel the strain of responsibility. Not to mention, just being himself still makes him perfectly worthy of being loved. In any relationship, there will be times when one person needs more support than they themself can give, and that doesn't mean that they aren't enough. We're seeing, yet again, that he sometimes just doesn’t recognize how deeply he is valued by others. At this point, maybe a part of him still feels like he needs to be of service in order to be accepted, let alone loved. I also personally interpret this line as partially concerning his insecurity around not "providing" his partner with sex at this time, reiterating this deeply internalized belief that he needs to perform in order to be valued.

All of these little moments add so much subtly and humanity to his character, and make his development feel natural and earned. The payoff is clear after Cazador's death, when we get to see his new confidence:

He doesn't have to ask "really?" this time.

"You believed in me - believed I was enough just the way I am."

He truly knows now that he is loved.

[dollkuna]

the digest. ex-con sukuna's your neighbor and you're determined to make him open up <3

the apartment you snagged wasn't anything special – in fact, it was kind of a dump. but it was cheap, and right now, that's all that mattered. (for sukuna, your new neighbor, it was probably the only place that would take him, given his past.)

sukuna, a scowl practically permanently etched on his face, probably thought the place was too dull for you, too dim. he was right; the wooden floors creaked with every step, and cobwebs clung to the light fixtures in the hallway.

at first, he wanted nothing to do with you. it wasn't personal; he simply didn't care to. but a week after you moved in, you were knocking on his door, a bright, disarming smile on your face.

he pulled the door open slowly, his brows narrowed into a suspicious v. as if you couldn't feel the palpable wave of go away radiating from him, you thrust a batch of warm, freshly baked cookies his way. he eyed them warily, a deep frown creasing his forehead.

"i baked you a little something," you chirped, practically radiating sunshine and rainbows. he visibly grimaced, but you weren't deterred. "you know, like… thanks for being my neighbor!"

sukuna squinted. "s'not like i had much of a choice." he wondered if you knew about his not-so-bright past, if you'd ever seen his face splashed across the papers. but the way you looked at him, so softly, like he was just… human, made him think you had no idea.

that was your very first interaction. he'd tried to cut it short, hoping to make it abundantly clear he wanted nothing to do with anyone. but in your mind, he'd accepted the cookies, and that meant something. that meant progress.

sukuna was fascinating. he made you curious, and you were absolutely up for the challenge.

every time you saw him around, whether it was in the dreary laundry room downstairs or at the convenience store a block away, you made sure to greet him. if you were lucky, he'd acknowledge your existence with a grunt or a curt nod.

"so, what's your deal?" you asked one afternoon, watching him load his clothes into the dryer. your nails tapped a rhythm against a nearby folding table, and you tilted your head, studying him.

sukuna scoffed, not even turning around. "my deal? i have no deal, woman."

"oh, you definitely have a deal," you insisted. "you're the broodiest guy i know, but then you've got this bright pink hair."

slowly, he turned, his lips pressed into a thin, straight line. "what's that supposed to mean?"

"nothing," you mumbled, a small, knowing smile playing on your lips. "never mind." you didn't give up hope, though. "i like the pink hair. it suits you."

and no, you didn't miss the faint flush that crept onto his cheeks, nor the almost imperceptible ghost of a smile that briefly touched his lips.

guess he couldn't avoid you forever, anyway.

[garuye]

Hiiii welcome to my cringe "jonadio are reborn as fairies in Pixie Hollow bookverse" au where I have an actual story I may or may not work up the energy to tell start to finish. The whole thing is kind of a disgustingly self-indulgent "they get a chance to do it right", while... still not being quite that easy. Sorry, Dio. It took a long time just to do the ref sheets because I was overthinking them so hard, but I had a lot of help from friends! If you're interested in deranged rambling, more under the cut!

Teehee irl size. Some extra context for what's relevant in this post specifically:

For those who don't know shit about disney fairies, fairies are born from a baby's first laugh. Neverland is a semi-sentient thing that travels and decides which laughs it wants and when. I'm taking it loose with what's canon and what isn't, because this isn't Peter Pan, fairies with talents is just a concept that for some reason I always love to come back to, and the books got a lot closer to what I loved about it than the movies did.

Whether it's handled well in the source material or not is another story, but an "incomplete fairy" is what they call one whose baby's first laugh was broken for some reason, and it's essentially an offensive term for fairies with any kind of disabilities. I use it because it resonates with my experience with developmental disability and want to be clear that there is not actually anything "incomplete" about either of them, it's just baseline prejudice (as I would very personally and emotionally like them to hear from Mother Dove). The Home Tree is a big friendly community, but it follows unspoken rules that can be harsh when broken. The way these two are treated for that is pretty close to how Prilla was in "Fairy Dust and the Quest for the Egg", except there's no grand, Neverland-saving feat they'll perform to earn everybody's special affections, they just have to do the best they can with what they're given. Jonathan will take more of the brunt of it, while Dio will mask over his instincts and blend in where he chooses.

Having two talents isn't just unheard of, it's not really possible, so fairies who can't accept what they don't understand will try to force Jonathan into a category that they do. As for why he does, it's because he practiced Hamon as a human— this ability bled over into his new life in a slightly more magical but not especially more functional way. More details I'd hope to explain more organically later. You can probably tell but I have uh. A tism. Thanks for coming to my TED talk!!

And yes, if any single soul noticed, I wrote Jojo's stupid book title in leaf lettering. Ridiculous thing that it is. "On Kyto the Dragon".

And the first post about them, for good measure!

(and a final, final note, I used the word "tampering" with the dust, but it's nothing like a Zarina situation, I actually really can't stand The Pirate Fairy)

[rainandsentences]

The space between

a Luca x f!reader

synopsis: You don't understand your constant anger, you don't let anyone approach but somehow you could see how people notice, how he notices.

rating: 16+

word count: 1.3 k

warnings: mention of implied past sexual abuse

a/n: this is the first part of three that i have planned. i understand somehow the pain that comes with locking traumas, specially such as grooming and sexual abuse. i want to express how the topic can affect on the victim even years later, i know each individual is different and each of us deal with it in also different ways. i want to comfort myself and also others that unfortunately might relate with it.

you're so strong, don't forget it. ❤️‍🩹

——————————————————————————

Most of the time you weren’t trying to get the attention. You were always the quiet girl that sat on the corner. So, most of your life was focused on being the best at whatever you did. That was your way of standing out, to be noticeable. That brought you there, one of the best restaurants of high quality in all of Copenhagen.

You’re not mean.

But most people wouldn’t believe that.

They think you are — sharp-tongued, stiff-backed, untouchable. Firm and always giving the orders as you should.

You’re not trying to change their perspective either. It’s easier, in some messed-up way, to be seen as cold than to be seen as scared. Because scared invites questions. And you’ve spent years building your silence like a shelter. It’s ugly, maybe. But it’s safe.

Mostly.

So, when you were transferred to another restaurant and met your coworkers you couldn’t help but notice the tall blonde man with arms covered in tattoos.

After you find out that his name was Luca and you see him working in the kitchen two nights a week.

 He’s quiet. Keeps to himself. Polite, but not too much. The kind of person who speaks only when needed moves like he’s thinking about something no one else can see.

Your favorite kind of person: the one who doesn't ask for anything.

It’s the third or fourth time you end up near him during closing that you start to pick up on the small things.

He wipes down surfaces with method, but not perfection. Doesn’t like wasting time on pointless steps. Don’t look over your shoulder. Doesn’t interrupt.

He doesn’t touch people, either.

He’ll pass a container to someone without making contact. Stand just a little further back than everyone else. Not in a way that draws attention. Just… aware. Careful.

You notice. But you don’t say anything.

He doesn’t either.

Which is maybe the first thing you like about him.

Weeks pass like that. Easy, distant rhythm. The kind of neutral space that doesn’t ask you to be more than what you are. You don’t think he’s watching you — not like that. But he notices things. You can tell.

You drop a tray once. Reflexive flinch. He doesn’t comment.

Another time, someone at the bar gets too handsy with one of the waitresses. You freeze, can’t stop watching. He watches too — but not with interest. With concern. Quiet, unreadable.

Then he’s gone for two weeks.

You tell yourself it doesn’t matter.

But when he shows up again, something in you exhales.

You hate that. Why him? Ew.

The day he returned to the restaurant was quiet. His polite salute to everyone when he arrived made you look at him. He nodded easily and kept his gaze at his work.

Clearly you tried not to gaze at him, but that day was full of interactions between you and him. “The flour” or “Hand me the stir.”

After the shift, there were just the two of you.

“Thought you left,” you say, first words you’ve spoken to him directly.

He shrugs; eyes focused as he put his coat on. “Just went back to Chicago for a bit. Had to check in.”

You nod, even though you didn’t ask for details.

He doesn’t offer them.

Another reason you like him.

The first shift after that is normal. Or as normal as things get for you.

The kitchen’s loud. Someone blasts music. You keep your head down, do your part, stay out of the way. But the air is tight today. Your chest is already aching from tension you didn’t know you were carrying.

And then someone — one of the newer guys, trying too hard to be funny — throws a towel.

It hits your shoulder.

Not hard. Not even meant for you, maybe. But you freeze anyway. You feel inexplicable anger.

Your hands are numb. Stomach drops. You feel heat behind your eyes.

You hear laughter. Not cruel — just unaware. And as you wanted to burst for something so simple as that you hear: “Hey. Not cool.”

Luca’s voice.

Quiet, low, calm. But firm.

The laughter stopped.

You don’t look at him. Can’t.

But your hands stop shaking. And you sigh softly.

Later, after closing, you’re wiping down the stainless steel by the sink when he approaches. Not close. Just near enough that you can feel his presence shift the air.

“You okay?”

You could lie. Say yes. Say you didn’t even notice.

Instead you say, “Yeah. Just hate surprises.”

He nods like he understands. Doesn’t push. Doesn’t say you’re overreacting.

Just nods, and says, “Me too.”

And you don’t become friends. Not really. You just… exist near each other. You talk a little more. Exchange dry observations. Share long silences that don’t ask to be filled.

It’s nothing. And it’s everything.

Because for once, someone doesn’t make you feel wrong for being how you are.

One night, it gets quiet.

Too quiet.

You’re locking up alone. Everyone else has gone. You thought Luca left too.

But then you see him — in the back alley, smoking something slowly. Leaning against the wall, staring up at the sky like he’s trying to memorize the darkness.

You pause.

He glances over, lifts his chin in a silent greeting.

You hesitate, then walk over — stopping a good few feet away.

He doesn’t move.

You stand there, silent, unsure why you came.

“I thought you had left.” he says suddenly.

“No, I needed to check out some things for tomorrow.”

He nods.

“I leave tomorrow to Boston again.”

Now you nod.

“I was wandering if you want to dinner with me when I come back.” He says confident and now looking at you.

“Why?”

“Why, what?”

“You need something? I mean, we can talk if you do.”

He looks clearly confused.

“No, I don’t need anything. I just want to dine with you.”

You swallow.

“Right.” She says sarcastic. “Just say that you want to fuck me, that’s it.”

He finally straightened, his eyes locked on her, completely wide.

“What the hell are you talking about?” He says firmly.

You look away.

“I mean…”

He sighs and turns his cigarette off.

“Goodnight.” He mumbles as he walks away.

You close your eyes and scoff in anger as you leave too.

Why did you say that?

That night you had the same dream, unwanted hands, the tears, the physical ache, the secret you were forced to keep over the years. The pain you learned to live with and the anger that it caused you. 

Because you never asked for it, you were a child, and he was supposed to take care of you.

So, you learned that it was all they wanted from you, and you coped with it, you learned to use it at your favor, but you despised it. You despised yourself for that.

When he came back, you didn’t speak to him. He didn’t either.  And you weren’t going to be the one to fold first, not against him. And even if it wasn’t a competition, you felt like it.

He kept his politeness, and you kept your indifference.

The next shift, someone pats your back in passing.

You flinch. It’s quick, involuntary. You look at the guy as you hear a scoff. “Jesus, Relax.”

You’re ready to snap. Already pulling words like weapons from your throat.

But Luca’s voice cuts through first. “Mate, it’s simple, just don’t touch her.”

The room stills.

You blink, stunned.

He doesn’t look angry. Just… firm. Protective, without being loud.

The guy mutters something and walks off.  You frown silently and look at him.

Luca doesn’t look at you. Just keep working.

And somehow that’s worse. And better. You don’t know how to thank him. So, you don’t.

He noticed how much you didn’t want to be touched, and you thought about it in your room at night.

You wonder if you had to apologize, if you should call him… No, you don’t even have his phone number and what for? 

But you think about his voice. The way it didn’t waver.  You press your forehead to your knees and breathe.

Maybe, just maybe, you could finally dine with him.

[softerglow]

stop overspending! or else!

this post is for you if you end each month in the negatives and you need someone to talk sense into you. i'm not pulling punches here, so scroll if that's not for you.

you're an adult, you don't need the new trendy toy. you especially don't need all 10 colours and the super rare special one. they aren't collectables that will appreciate in value, they'll be landfill fodder 3 years from now.

stop buying makeup and skincare without a plan. especially if there's product going rancid in your makeup bag because you're not finishing things. use what you have, then buy more.

speaking of skincare, keep your routines simple. you don't need 12 actives unless they were prescribed to you by a dermatologist (and even then, consider a second opinion please). doing too much will hurt you and your wallet in the long run.

one in one out. i can only buy an item of clothing when i donate or throw away one. this stops me from chasing trends and keeps me mindful of my impact.

limit the number of subscriptions you let yourself have. especially if it's streaming or gaming services. or apps, especially nasty little productivity apps that promise to change your life but are just glorified to do lists charging you $9.99 a month. two or three should be enough.

stop smoking! idc if it's vape, cigarettes or bud. quit. watch as your bank account stops screaming for help.

if you know it's overpriced, don't buy it.

if you know you don't need it, don't buy it.

no but seriously, don't buy it please. wasting money and resources and causing environmental damage because you want something and can't be bothered to think it through is not what we do here.

get your spending under control and work through the feelings going on behind the impulses. keep a journal that you write in every time you decide whether or not to buy something.

you can do it, by the way. i know that you're capable of managing your money the way you always dreamed. you're the kind of person who makes your money work for you. you just made a mistake, and it's time to forgive yourself and shake off the shame. get up and fix your money.

[miraculouslbcnreactions]

Adrien this season wears the same wrinkled outfit his dad picked out for him, sleeps on a mattress on the floor, has no passion besides being with Marinette and being chat noir, learned how to make the only meal we ever saw him share with his dad, and despite his version being better claims his dad’s were perfect.

And ppl who claim to love him are watching him go thru this and no one is helping the guy out. Only Alya has been “hey! lying to the guy is wrong and is making him stagnate” but she would rather have her memory erased than say anything.

I stg if “the power of love” is Adrien finding the strength to forgive everyone when he finds out I am going to lose it.

Agreed. Season six is really showing what I mean when I say that Miraculous has terrible plot lines for an episodic formula show. Adrien being depressed and processing his father's death is not the kind of conflict that you can resolve in 20 minutes or less, but every episode is supposed to standalone, so we're getting this awkward back and forth where the issue is randomly acknowledged in one episode only to be ignored in the next one because it doesn't fit the tone of the episode and the quality of the episodes as singular entities is more important than the quality of the season as a whole.

The Alya thing was an especially glaring example of the issue. In Revelator, Alya learns the truth about Gabriel and her reaction isn't, "I have to tell Adrien" it's "I hate that I'm going to have to keep this secret, too!"

Rena Rouge: You don't get to decide what Adrien should or shouldn't know. Neither do I. Truth is essential for someone's personal growth, and now that I know I'm gonna have to lie! And you know I don't. like. Lying!

This statement is nonsensical. Alya starts by declaring that Adrien deserves the truth and ends lamenting the fact that she'll have to lie to him, too, as if lying is the only option. It's not, though. She could tell him the truth! Half the cast could!

At least, they could in a serialized show, but this is an episodic formula show where canon-changing reveals can only happen in the season finals, so Alya telling Adrien the truth was never on the table. That's why the episode's conflict wasn't "should we tell Adrien" it was "should Alya be in on the lie, too." You can see this clearly at the end of the episode where Alya actively wants her mind wiped so she doesn't tell Adrien:

Rena Rouge: Some secrets are heavier than others and I am afraid I won't be able to keep this one... Cat Noir: But isn't that wrong? Rena Rouge: No. Because it's meant to give people the ability to choose whether to share their secret or not. (She looks at Ladybug) And that's repairing things.

This is wildly inauthentic to Alya's character. She should be fighting to keep her memory so she can tell Adrien! But she can't do that because it's too upsetting for kids and the episode needs to feel like it has a satisfying conclusion so this is the only way the conflict could be played just like Adrien's depression can't be addressed in a way that calls characters to action.

Major changes can only happen at the start of a season, the end of a season, or in a special because that's how episodic formula shows work. Status quo is king so that episodes can air in any order. Miraculous is never going to give you a strong plot that plays out over the course of a season. The most you're ever going to get are undeveloped hints at the plot lines you desperately want to see. Teasers that keep you hooked while never paying off because they literally can't.

Will Adrien learn the truth and/or process his grief today? No. If that's going to happen, it will happen in the season finale and I would not be surprised if we don't even get it then. The show has a rule that there must always be a secret between Marinette and Adrien and I don't see how you undo the Gabriel secrets while keeping the identity stuff a secret. I'm still curious how they'll even do a proper reveal of the truth because it means addressing the fact that Gabriel was dying from a cataclysm Adrien inflicted on him.

This show is slated for at least two more seasons. It's entirely possible that Adrien will stay in the dark for several or even all of those. I'm not saying that's what they'll do, I'm just pointing out that it's a distinct possibility based on the way the show has been written in the past so I'd strongly encourage you to brace yourselves for the worst while hoping for the best.

Minor fun fact: while Adrien's depression feels like something you could possibly address in an episodic formula show, my bet is that they won't because addressing the depression means redoing his character model to a new outfit and his room to a new design. Those are noticeable changes that would confuse people who missed the episode where it happened and I would be shocked if the show took that risk. Because of the formula show issue, Adrien probably has to stay in his sad bedroom and dirty old clothes until a season finale or the start of a new season just like the sad bedroom was introduced at the start of the season. It's the same reason Ladybug's suit upgrade wasn't a total upgrade. She kept her classic look so that the episodes could air in any order without confusing viewers.

[absolutebl]

This is a BL Challenge for you (if you want to accept them) :

1.) Is there a BL that you finished even when :

a. You love the story but not really fond of the actors (maybe the acting or other reasons)?

b. You love the acting (the series as a whole) but not really fond with the story?

2.)

a. Is there a BL that you dislike at the beginning but when you finish them, it became one of your favorite?

b. What is your fav BL cover?

3.) Please write your top 3 or top 5 favorite tropes in BL.

From each trope, write at least 2 BL that you love.

4.) Who are your top 5 (or top 3) top & bottom from your favorite BL media, the top and bottom don't have to be from the same BL.

5.) What are you favorite BL from the 1990s and 2000s?

6.)

a. BL you finished that is just bizarre but you still enjoy them?

b. BL that have stayed with you (special for you) or influenced you (at least 5 titles)?

7.)

a. BL that you love only (mostly) because of the sexy scenes?

b. BL that is your guilty pleasure?

8.) Your fav non-canon BL ships from any media?

9.) Your top 5 or top 3 fav each for Green Flag BL couples & Red Flag BL couples.

10.)

a. What is your first BL that made you got into BL?

b. What BL that made you cry (happy or sad)?

Thanks if you want to answer all of the above! Feel free to answer how many that you want...

Also, thanks so much for your BL recs & reviews! 🤩😆

OMG this is so fun! Exactly what I wanted to do this morning (and not work). Challenge accepted!!! (I also added a few for s&g)

The BL Challenge Questions

1.) Is there a BL that you finished even when :

a. You love the story but not really fond of the actors (maybe the acting or other reasons)?

This is hard, very rarely does BL get me on story alone. It would likely be from Korea or Japan. Picks up an examines Life Love On the Line. Sets it back down gently. Maybe Blueming? Don't kill me stans, but Bump Up Business? Would I put some of the first season HIStory in here.?

Honestly? I'm super hard pressed to name a BL that got me on story alone.

b. You love the acting (the series as a whole) but are not fond of the story?

One instantly springs to mind for this, Eternal Yesterday. I knew what I was in for with that story from the start. We all did. But it is still horrible.

Also My Stand-In, The On1y One, and The Time of Fever. Oof.

I would put a number of second seasons into this category too like Minato 2, or To My Star 2. And quite a few of early BLs with missed or muddy endings like I Am Your King. All the true dark BLs and moody artshouse stuff have to be set aside, I think, because I knew what I was in for. Well, except The Effect and HIStory3: The BL That Shall Not Be Named. Never forget. Never forgive.

c. You're not fond of either just some kind of BL masochist?

Cupid's Last Wish and Ossan's Love in all iterations. (WHY did I do that to myself)

If I had a do over I would have dropped CLW. Now that I have a solid DNF policy in place (and there is so much BL airing I can be picky) there are quite a few BLs I wish I had simply never wasted time on in retrospect.

2.) Is there a BL that you dislike at the beginning but when you finished, it became one of your favorites?

Ooooh another easy one! Bad Buddy. It started as a trash watch and became a praise watch and it stuck that landing like nobody's business. I live blogged it, so you could all watch my CTJ moment in real time.

There are actually a few others in this category like My Beautiful Man, DNA Says Love You, even Love Sick but I wouldn't say I disliked them as much as I did BB at the start.

3.) What is your fav BL cover?

You mean OST? Oh good, another easy one (I have so few songs I like from BLs).

Eternal Yesterday's Sunshower by Ayumu Imazu

Ooo, now I'm listening to it. Yay!

4.) Top 5 favorite tropes in BL. For each trope, write at least 2 BLs that you love that represent it.

Whipping Boy - My Beautiful Man, My Personal Weatherman

Stepbrothers (or similar family taboo) - Unknown, Cherry Blossoms After Winter

Age Gap (specifically were the younger is the aggressor) - Minato's Laundromat, Old Fashion Cupcake

Student/teacher - Private Lesson, Love Class 2 (side couple)

Kink - KinnPorsche (side couple), The Next Prince (side couple) - neither of these are BLs I love, but I love these couples in them.

I know I have some other rare topes too, but I wanted to choose 5 obviously recognizable ones.

5.) Who are your top 5 top & bottom seme/uke from your favorite BLs, they don't have to be from the same BL.

I specifically tried to pick not from the same BL as a challenge.

a. Top 5 seme

Dean in Until We Meet Again

Solo in Oxygen

Shin in Minato's Laundromat

Togawa in Old Fashion Cupcake

Karan in Cherry Magic Thailand

Gotta say I eliminated a number of favorites because they were too toxic (my bad) and others because they did not come from a favorite BL. But most went to the wayside because they didn't fit the ideal of seme well enough. Bye bye Taiwan.

b. Top 5 uke

Taekyung in Light On Me

Sangwoo in Semantic Error

Kakeru in I Cannot Reach You (possibly my favorite of all time)

Amagi in Takara & Amagi

Won in Unintentional Love Story

Different reason for eliminating favorites with the uke. Blushing maidens and super tsunderes don't make my cut.

Gotta shout out My School President for satisfying both.

6.) What are you favorite old BLs?

a. From the 1990s

I would argue that BL as a genre (defined as such by watchers and critics) did not exist until after 2000. So instead here is a blog post on some 90s movies that, in retrospect, have certain QL leanings. Old Guard Queer Cinema for BL Lovers.

b. From the early 2000s

Seven Days

Another easy one. Always shows up somehow. Someday everyone on this hellsite will have watched this show and it will be primarily because of me.

And then I will disappear in a puff of smake and accomplishment.

But here are some early BLs you might not know about that I also enjoy.

7.) 5 BL you finished that is just bizarre but you still enjoy them?

The Sign

To Sir With Love

Secret Relationships

Pit Babe

Laws of Attraction

8.) 5 BLs that have stayed with you (special for you) or influenced you?

We Best Love

Dark Blue Kiss

Until We Meet Again

Seven Days

Old Fashion Cupcake

9.) BL that you love only (mostly) because of the sexy scenes?

This Love Doesn't Have Long Beans

The Sign

Deep Night

Love in the Air (sigh)

Jack & Joker

10 more here from 2023 and prior. My Stubborn might get into this category too.

10.) BL that is your guilty pleasure?

2 Moons Ambassador probably. But I don't really feel guilty about BL. Here are some of my all time favorite Trash Watches,

11.) Your fav non-canon BL ships from any media?

I try not to ship unless strictly called for so, Devil Judge probably.

12.) Your top 5 fav each:

a. Green Flag BL couples

ThamePo

WandeeGoodday

Monster Next Door

My Ride

Your Sky

Just to name a few. I have MORE. 2024 was very good to us.

b. Red Flag BL couples.

My Personal Weatherman

Our Youth

The Time of Fever

the stepbrothers in HIStory 4 (I KNOW)

far too much MAME

13.) BL that got you into BL?

Until We Meet Again

I had seen some before it from Japan (Takumi etc..) but I thought of them as a rare one offs (not a genre). Which they kind of were. I think it took Thailand really entering the field to drag my arse in whole hog.

Honestly, my memory from 2019 Bl is so Hazy it might have been Love By Chance instead. But UWMA is my origin story and I am sticking to it.

This is one reason I advise, if you keep a spreadsheet, to have a column for "date you watched" as well as "date it aired."

But I didn't even have a spreadsheet back then. Early days...

14.) BL that made you cry (happy or sad)?

A hard one, since it isn't charted on the Spreadsheet of Doom. And I cry A LOT. I'll just pick 10 recent ones:

Unknown

Love For Love's Sake

Let Free the Curse of Taekwondo

When it Rains it Pours

See Your Love

Our Youth

Secrets Happened on the Litchi Island

Caged Again

Heesu in Class 2

The Time of Fever 

(source)

[belscarpenter]

bsf!ellie x sick!reader. bsf!ellie who has no idea what she's doing when it comes to caring for a cold. bsf!ellie who's usually indifferent when she seldom catches one and ignores it altogether, but thinks you're the exception. you always are. you're nestled into bed tenderly, ellie whispering a gentle "let me know if there's anything i can do." "anything?" you rasp, your eyes glassy, irritated, and red rimmed. "anything." bsf!ellie, her usual relentless self, who won't let you push her away and insists on caring for you despite your protests about her own wellbeing. you argue—just enough to say you tried—but give up after a while. bsf!ellie who was never listening anyway and is immediately tucking your blanket under your chin with a look so full of worry it makes your chest ache, brushing your hair back delicately, and resting her head against your chest like she belongs there when you stop talking. bsf!ellie who brings you all kinds of special soups joel taught her on their old forced family camping trips just to make sure you stay hydrated. in reality, she just wants to hear you say she's a good cook after an especially tasty bowl. you, who really want your personal space though–solely so she doesn't get sick. bsf!ellie who wants your personal space too :3 ! she's obstinate throughout it all, muttering that she'll be fine. p.s, she's not. she gets sick of course and won't stop grumbling about how it’s "your fault" as if she hadn't spent the entire night selfishly wrapped around your feverish body like you were the last warm thing on earth. bsf!ellie who clams up when cat, her ex girlfriend, of all people pays a visit to check up on you. "oh hey ellie, i was just coming to see if my friend was okay. what're you doing here?" "uhhh. sorry, uh, some stuff." "you're totally taking care of her, aren't you?" cat smiles knowingly. "no! i mean, ahem, no. i'm not soft like that." uhm she is. she so, so is. bsf!ellie who everyone except you knows is utterly, completely whipped for you. bsf!ellie who, even now–with a stuffy nose and scratchy voice–insists she'd do it all over again just to hold you a little longer.

a/n–i can FEEL a cold coming on. like this ALWAYS HAPPENS BEFORE I GET ONE. i have these torturous shin splints from doing..! nothing. send help pls anyway ily bye

[myheartisstarving]

There's a special kind of isolation that hits when you're surrounded. When everyone's laughing, talking, touching, literally alive and u're standing there, smiling with ur mouth and screaming with ur mind. It's not that they don't care, it's that they don't see. U've made urself invisible so well, even YOU forget u're real sometimes.

Because the truth is, I could sit in the middle of a crowd and feel like I'm rotting in a soundproof coffin. I could be held and still feel untouched, spoken to, but not heard. Seen, but not recognized. I am haunted by my own absence, a ghost pretending to be a person, an echo wrapped in skin.

And the worst part? I'm good at it. I mirror their energy, I laugh at the right time, I perform the role, flawlessly. So they never ask, they never dig. They just assume I'm fine because I make it easy for them to believe it. But I walk home every night with a smile that's stiff and a chest that's hollow. I go to sleep wondering how I can be so close to everyone and still feel like I've been buried alive.

That's the kind of loneliness no one talks about; not the absence of people, but the absence of being understood and truly seen. Because being around people while feeling invisible? That's not just loneliness, that's psychological erosion and I'm disappearing piece by piece.

I laughed with ten people today and still came home starving for connection.

[mahalkitamully]

a piece of cake 𝜗𝜚⋆₊˚

: grumpy ! L lawliet x sunshine ! reader oneshot

꩜ tags !! : @xdwoll , @cocomilaa

includes !! : readers referred to as 'detective,' L is 'ryuzaki,' i don't proofread my things when im done ...

i've never written for L before so sorry if it's inaccurate !! also it's 3 am, i've spent the whole day taking care of kids so i'm sorry if this is bad!!!

ー

to say L hated you was an understatementー at least, you thought he did. the way he brushes you off, his blunt corrections that left your palms sweaty and your cheeks hot, and the way he always seemed to be eyeing you while you worked. his gaze unblinking was kinda scary. not to you though. something about him was so endearing. the way he was so smart yet lacked every social cue was kinda sweet. that, L never understood. why did you like him so much?

"L!!" your voice rang through the small hotel room, a wide smile across your face as you walked in with plastic bags of strawberry shortcake. he sat on a sofa chair and was sipping on a cup of tea only to flinch at your volume. "..please refer to me as ryuzaki, detective." his gaze flicked from his laptop, before locking on the plastic bags you so cheerfully placed on the table. "is that cake?"

as he ate the slice you gave him, he tilted his head and pointed the fork at you. "is there any specific reason you bought this for me detective? although cake is a sweet and preferable treat to snack on while working, i can't think of any other reason as to why you'd get this for me." you giggled, sitting on the chair next to him. "well, i just wanted to treat you!"

his gaze was somewhat suspicious, his fork resting between his lips before he sighed. "your enthusiasm is unnecessary-.. and if you'll excuse me detective i still have to work on this case. speaking of which- do you have the-"

you cut him off by placing the files on his lap, grinning proudly at your hard work. "i have all the info on everything, from other potential suspects, to even things i found suspicious from when we were watching chief yagami's son!" he huffed, taking the files between his index and thumb with a grumble. "did you have to place it on me in such a manner? you could've just handed it to me." he paused, before taking a strawberry into his mouth. ''..but.. thank you detective."

his reluctant tone made you giggle, your hands folded in your lap. "anytime ryuzaki!"

your voice was so cheery and filled with light, such a contrast compared to L's flat and sometimes brooding one.

he seemed to grumble at your giggle, his eyes glued onto his laptop screen. "....quit that."

"oh- sorry-!" at the silence, he seemed even more irritated. what was going on inside his head?

"..well, don't be quiet. it's... unnatural and unsettling."

"oh- ok-! sorry-..??"

"...you know detective, you're very distracting." he spoke up suddenly, his gaze never lifting from the computer. "honestly, it's a hassle. whenever you're in the room, i can't help but stare at you. it's kind of irritating."

your smile faded as your jaw dropped, cheeks flushed at his words. he was so blunt and straightforward you couldn't help but be taken aback. your thoughts were overlapping and running all around your head while he's thinking about how good the cake was.

"detective, sorry in advance for being too casual, but have you ever had a partner before? a romantic one, i mean." he broke you out of your thoughts, still a bit dumbfounded.

"uh- no i've- never had a partner.. why-?" he hummed. "no reason."

"have you, ryuzaki?" you raised a brow, your voice playful and teasing. he tensed a bit, only to keep typing away at the laptop. "no. i'm far too busy in my work to keep a romantic partner entertained."

"oh c'mon, not even a crush???"

"honestly i've found plenty of cases on things such as romance, but i've never thought too deeply on it."

"what?? surely you've had that special person, the one you can't keep your eyes off, who makes your palms sweat and your cheeks flush. surely!!"

he paused, your words sinking in. he thought for a moment. had he ever had a person who made him feel butterflies? the more he thought, the worse it got. he glanced at youー your eager smile, the excitement coloring your faceー the way you made him feel pissed him off. he could never fully comprehend the feeling of love. he was silent for a while, before clearing his throat.

"well- uhm-. thank you detective for the cake. it's.. raining tonight. do you have an umbrella?" he spoke, his tone nonchalant but honestly he was anything but. "or if you'd prefer i could have watari drop you off."

"no- no ryuzaki that's perfectly fine.." you smiled, your cheeks still warm as you stood up as well. "thank you ryuzaki."

"...thank you detective. get- home safe."

as you left the hotel he let out a sigh and sat back down on the couch, sinking into it. "are you alright?" watari spoke as L sighed, gazing at the now empty cake container you had bought for him. "seems to me something sweet has caught your eye?" L caught his implication, his gaze tilted to him.

"who asked you, watari?"

. . .

again sorry if this is bad i lowk had no idea where it was gonna go other than just hint at L completely crushing for reader 💔 sorry for edging y'all i'll make a pt 2 or smth later trust

[izzy-the-chaotic-gremlin]

For making a old CRT feel special~

Uh yeah! I made FANART HEHEHEH!!! Uh, not much I can say except for sorry for the horrible camera quality my camera is half broken right now- oh and if you're wondering why Tenna has a slightly different design is because I give each Tenna I come across a different design of how a person writes them, personally yours give me exuberant and bubbly yet kind of fancy feel so I went for more fancy vibe with it yet still bubbly and happy!

Also the drawings better if you look at it slightly tilted because that was how it was drawn-

Anywho close ups and design breakdown undercut :)

Ok, so I went for more green vibe with him since my Tenna design has blue! And for each 10 that I draw I shall give them a different color for their gloves and other little accessories!!!

He is stickers on his greenish blue plug tail from kids and fans sticking them on there, the reason they're not higher up is because it's harder to reach that area on Tenna when you're reaching out to him from below while he's up on the stage!

Full arrow buttons were just for fun but I think they look really cool :)

He's supposed to have a leather belt which has the TV thingy on it!

He is ever so slight claws alongside with his exuberant green gloves!

He is a couple stickers stuck on his TV head specifically (as I like to imagine) from Kris! (They stuck them on him in the light world btw)

I accidentally gave him a golden fang like my design- but honestly it fits :)

One of his attena is slightly binge while the other one has a bit of paint chipping off of it!

The longer gloves were to give that more fancy feel :)

Anywho here are the close ups!!!

Fun fact! You can see Pippin and the cat Mike staring down from above the stage :) (forgive me for not knowing the Mike's name I never really saw them and I've only ever seen them from fandom 😭)

Plus one at a different angle

(as tenna leaned down to give people high fives, one of them reached past tennas outstretched hand-- and poked a sticker on his casing. a strawberry red heart with a golden outline and a glittery finish. A ghostly giggle left the cloaked figure as the faintest outline of a purple toothy grin became visible in the darkness of their hood -- they seem satisfied with their work.)

[* Tenna stiffened for just a moment, seeming slightly alarmed—until he understood what they were doing. He looked down at his wrist, assessing the new addition to his casing with an expression of curiosity. A smile slowly spread across his face into a wide beam as he glanced back down at the ghostly guest. Maybe it wasn't obvious, considering he had no eyes—at least not in the traditional sense—but his gaze was meeting theirs. If he did have eyes, they'd almost certainly be twinkling with a youthful delight.]

[* He held his wrist up to the rest of the sea of fans, showing off the sticker proudly.]

Look at that, folks! Ain't that just dandy? I think it matches my style real swell! Brings out my eyes!!

[* Tenna laughed good-naturedly, holding his hand up against the side of his head in display, as if to actually compare the sticker with his non-existent eyes. The crowd whistled, whooped, and hooted with gusto!]

I'm LOVING the enthusiasm tonight, everybody!! Let's keep it going!

And as for you, my dear...

[* With a quick twirl, Tenna turned and pointed at the ghost in the crowd. He balled his gloved hand up for just a moment, and with a quick flick of his wrist, he was holding a healthy and vibrant yellow rose! He leaned down, presenting it to the hooded figure.]

For makin' an old CRT feel special.

[* There were oohs and ahhs from the surrounding crowd, a couple of woots and hollers to boot—along with a few envious glances!]

[xtisumi]

HAPPY BIRTHDAY

Hope you enjoy the long journey that is reading ur bday msg mwhahahaha @aoutd 

*Sorry for this super long post, but this is for you so I know you’re going to appreciate it! Anyways I’m splitting this msg into three parts just because there’s a lot that I have to say and I want to organize it a bit so you could understand it easier! With that being said...

- Part One - 

HAPPY BIRTHDAY dude I’m going to say this a lot throughout the post so sorry if it loses value but IDC I FUCKING LOVE YOU SO FUCKING MUCH. You’re one of the best gifts life could have ever given me. You’re one of the greatest human beings, dude to me you’re the most beautiful person I’ve ever met and I’m just so fucking grateful that in less than a year we managed to become best friends. You’ve been so amazing to me and sometimes I feel like I don’t deserve you :( However I’ve enjoyed every single second that we’ve hung out. Whether it was watching Haikyuu!! or trolling you in ToS, teaching you how to play golf and later minecraft. Our random playful fights on discord or sitting in a call with you till 5 am just talking. Our first time rocket riding or when you first showed me BTS. I’ve enjoyed every single second being in your comforting presence. I fucking mean it when I say you make me the happiest person alive!!! Hopefully you enjoyed having me in your life :3 DUDE everything about you MAN HOLY FUCKING SHIT just I love everything about you like you truly are one of the most stunning, amazing, dorkiest, prettiest, smartest, strongest people that I know. You deserve the fucking universe and I just like fuck I just wanna wrap my arms around you and bury my head in your shoulders and just cry to you about how much I love you. I wanna feel the warmth of your body and be comforted by your energy and just be there hugging you and not wanting to let go :( I’m so happy we were able to meet and I hope you have the greatest birthday you’ve ever had!!! One day I’ll be there in person for your birthday. 

- Part Two - 

So I want to change the tone up a bit and kind of reflect on some things. If some parts are more serious than gay, I’m sorry but I wanna address some things. First thing I want to mention is that so far we’ve had an amazing friendship, everything about it seems perfect but we’re both mature enough to know even our friendship has flaws. If we want this to last then we both need to be mature about future complications. So far we never really fought or got genuinely mad at each other and I really hope it stays that way but like I said we’re both mature enough to understand that there will be times where we fight or argue and may cause problems. I’m bringing this up because the easy part was getting to that bff level while now the hard part is ensuring we last forever. I have faith that if fights occur we both will act like adults and own up to our actions and we get through any altercations that can cause turmoil between us. Dude ily and this friendship too much to see it end over pity shit so here’s to us working any trouble out together as adults <3 Now I wanna just talk about what you and your presence have meant to me. Kelly you’re by far one of the best things to ever happen to me. In every aspect you’re just too amazing and stunning and it’s just sometimes I feel like I don’t deserve you in my life. You’re one of the best humans on this planet and you’re fr a God. I love everything that you and your friendship has bestowed onto my life. You have no idea how grateful I am to have met you and how lucky I am to be living at the same time as you. Dude I’m serious you have made me cry in private because of just all the feelings I have for you. I love you so fucking much that it pains my heart and at times at night I cry because you simply exist. Not to get emo but I fear not death itself but what follows death... The earth is 4.5 billion years old and I only lived 20 years of that and I don’t remember the moment when I took my first breath. So when I die will I even remember my life? Will everything be blank and my existence transcend beyond this realm and into an empty void? This scares me because when I die I might forget you and my own life. I only have one life to live and I just so happened to have fallen in love with you. Now I know you just want to be friends and I respect that but the reason I’m saying all of this is because even as friends please let us make lifetime memories that I can cherish even in my final moments. I don’t want to ever forget you but if death causes us to forget each other and the life we lived then please let me have more memories with you. For about one year worth of being friends, we made some amazing personal memories and I really want to continue making new ones. You became a big aspect of my life now so I don’t want to feel like there’s things that we weren’t able to do. Another thing is we really got to meet up soon. Before 2018 I asked if you saw us meeting irl and you said probably. I never brought it up the subject that we should meet especially throughout the summer since tbh I’m not ready to meet you and also the vibes you give off rn makes it seem that you would see it more of a drag. Hopefully in 2019 we do meet up and you feel so excited to the point you’re running through people just to get to me :3 Seriously I want you to show me Chicago because I hardly explored it myself. Also I promised your little angel of a sister that when I meet you I was going to give you the painting I made for her ^~^ speaking of your siblings (you should feel more happier than I should) but I’m glad CoolGuy and your sister actually love me. It fr warms my heart knowing that they like me and even though I don’t know your other brother, I hope he sees me in the same way that your other siblings do :D I wanna meet your little sister one day and give her the warmest hug ever dude she fr an angel and I love her so much and even though she already knows... I want to tell her in person how much I love her older sibling Kel

- Part 3 -  

Okay sorry switching the tone a bit or whatever. Part One being that standard gay msg you’re familiar with and Part Two being some weird shit idek. So for this final part, I wanna just make this something that can bring the biggest smile on your face!!! What better way to approach it by stating that I LOVE YOU SO FUCKING MUCH IT ACTUALLY HURTS MY HEART ON GOD. I love that you’re a dork, I love your stupid giggle when we talk, I love making you smile, that damn fucking smile is something I will see with my own two eyes, I love your cheesy jokes/remarks, I love your personality, I love the fact we’re so similar and how we can relate to each other. You’re seriously the best fucking friend I could ever ask for and I’ll always cherish this bond that I was able to make with you dude. I’m never going to find someone else like you. Okay time for some cheesy lines to make you do that damn adorable giggle 

- If you were a flower, you’d be a sunflower (my fav flower and it shows that you’re my sun ^~^)

- If you were a book, I’d never put u down jk I’ll slam u on my desk and read u all night long LMFAO jkjk

- If you were a restaurant, you’re ass would fr be a 5 star one cause GODDAMN you’re a whole ass meal. Like the gods fr ain’t have to go all out on creating u :p the fact ur single is fr the 8th wonder of the world

- If I was able to listen to your voice at night, I’d finally be able to sleep with your monotone ass voice LMFAO jkjk I love hearing that warming and comforting voice. Not to be thirsty on main but like I’d fr would love to be in your arms and have you talk with that lovely voice and help me sleep :( 

Dude I’m fr so blessed to have met you and I’m just the happiest when I’m with you. Being fr posts like these could never fully grasp how much I actually love you and I just wish for the best for you! I fucking can’t wait to see how successful you’re going to become. You work so damn hard and I’m so fucking proud of everything you’ve achieved so far dude I know this is a weird request but please let me, if possible, be invited to your college graduation :( Like I want you to come to mines as well dude but yeah I want to be there in person and just see your little ass walk on that stage and get the diploma and degree that you’ve spent hours busting ur ass off for. I would fr cry dude being serious like that’s my little Kells, everyone look at them look at how amazing they are :’) Hopefully you love this message and also I hope you do have an amazing birthday <333333 One day I will fill that void in your life and tell you in person how much I love you

Believe it ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️     

*U call me Naruto from time to time so here’s a perfect gif of how I would actually be irl smiling at ur beautiful ass <3