#adopt anon

[egophiliac]

hear me out

silver vanrouge ❌️

silver draconia ✔️

malleus beats lilia to the punch

[demonic0angel]

What do you think about an au where kid Jazz caught kid Jason in the act of stealing Batman's tires. The end result, they both get kidnapped by Batman.

(I got really excited bc there’s been a lack of asks lmaooo, so it got long 💀)

Jason’s hands froze when he heard a gasp. When he looked up, it was to meet the shocked gaze of a cute girl with long red hair. “You!” She cried out, though thankfully, her voice was still rather hushed in alarm, “You can’t steal!”

She definitely wasn’t from Gotham. Her accent was all wrong, and all of her clothes were nice and pretty, completely unlike any Crime Alley residents. From her horror, it was likely that she was a lost tourist or some sort.

Jason hissed and put a finger to his lips. “Shut up! I can’t get caught!”

She looked indignant. “Yes! Because you’re committing a crime!”

“I don’t have money to eat!” Jason snapped. “The Batman’s rich, he can afford to replace these tires! Just leave me alone! I need this!”

The girl paused, staring at him for a long moment with wide eyes. Jason didn’t have time to dawdle. He could only hope to get at least one tire out before she ran off to report him or something, so he bent down and continued working on letting go of the tires.

The girl shuffled in place and then she said slowly, in a very nervous tone, “I’ll stay here to keep lookout. But you really shouldn’t be stealing!”

Jason smiled, but still snorted. “Yeah, yeah, whatever. The name’s Jason.”

“Jasmine, but call me Jazz,” she said. She looked around anxiously and stared at him for a moment. Then she advised, “You should remove all of the lug nuts at once instead of one at a time, if you want to be quicker. And you should get a breaker bar, instead of a tire iron. It’s more versatile.”

Jason lightly rolled his eyes but switched tactics, secretly a little pleased that a pretty girl was talking to him at all. By the time he removed three tires, Jazz had accompanied him the entire time. At some point, they even had light conversation.

Jazz was a year older than him, attending middle school with a little brother and two parents. She had visited Gotham on a vacation, but she was now lost. Jason had lost both of his parents, had no siblings, left school, and lived here as a penniless orphan.

It was fascinating how their worlds had collided.

“Okay, I’ll take these away first because I can’t get four away at once,” Jason said. “Wanna follow?”

Jazz bit into her lip. “I’ll stay here. Give me the tire iron, I can do the last one.”

Jason grinned and thanked her. He was quite lucky that she was both cute and clever! He hurriedly went to put away the three wheels, but even when he hadn’t gone far and came back, it was to see the Batman looming over a shivering Jazz, who almost seemed in tears as the Dark Knight began to approach her.

Without thinking, Jason ran forward and jumped in front of Jazz. “Hey! Back off! She didn’t do anything!” He took the tire iron from her and shielded her, his stomach fluttering from a mix of fear, nerves, and the fact that Jazz had grabbed the back of his shirt in vulnerability.

The Batman stared at them suspiciously. “Oh, really? Then what is the tire iron for?”

Jason glared at him. “This!” He snapped, before whacking him in the stomach with it. Jazz pulled Jason backwards and without ceremony, dropped down to sweep kick the Batman before jumping up to her feet and then grabbing Jason’s hand.

“Let’s run!” She cried, not noticing Jason’s astonishment before she was pulling him away.

Jason grinned at her fleeting back and then laughed as they scrambled away from the Batmobile and its possibly very irate owner. “You just attacked the Batman!”

“So did you!” Jazz responded breathlessly, turning pink in the face. “Where to?!”

Jason ran ahead of her, still holding her hand as he swiftly changed directions. “I’ll take you to my place! C’mon!”

Not even a full day later, Jason was stuffed into the back of the Batmobile, slumping over in his seat with many protests. Jazz sat next to him, sitting ramrod straight and looking nervously around but silent and wide eyed.

“You can’t kidnap us, old man! This is abduction!” Jason shouted at the Batman, who didn’t even look back at them as he started the car.

Jazz huddled against Jason’s body and he squeezed their hands together.

No matter what happened next, he would definitely protect her. Even against the Batman!

[captainkirkk]

been following for years because of similar tastes in media & characters and the way i punched the air in joy upon seeing that you’re getting into murderbot… im so excited for you!! i wish i could reread the books for the first time again.

i wasn’t sure about skarsgard when the casting was first announced for the show but i have to admit, he nails murderbot’s “skittish horse about to cave your head in” vibes in social situations so hard. murderbot is truly one of the autistic characters of all time, i love it and its unreliable narrator self with my whole heart ♥️

anyhow looking forward to hearing your thoughts on the series! i think you’ll like the books depiction of mensah & murderbot’s dynamic especially 😊 and another character yet to be introduced but i shant say

"Skittish horse about to cave your head in" is so perfect kjkds I'm really looking forward to being in MB's head more, its inner dialogue has been really enjoyable so far

Also I peeked on ao3 because I couldn't help myself AND? LOOK AT THAT?

Top THREE relationships on ao3 are platonic. That never happens. I did a quick count and 70% of the top 10 relationships are all Gen. Let's go!!!!

[awhoreintheory]

Spidey in Gotham brainrot is bad rn, and the whole Richard Grayson = Richard Parker thing??? Can't take it. I just can't. Imagine Peter busking in gotham by doing acrobatics or juggling (spider senses come real handy in catching stuff, imagine how damn good at juggling he would be with like a little bit of practice??) bc he's broke as hell and he doesn't have to keep up with his nerd persona at school or anything, so why not? And just Dick?? Seeing this street performer kid??? Who looks just like him????? A tiny lost little Grayson????? I wish I could draw bc I see it so clearly, but sadly I can only do like stick figures.

Bold of you to assume I wouldn't LOVE a stick figure reenactment

But no you get it!!! I'm completely absorbed in the Richard Parker is Dick Grayson brainrot,,, it's so good. I love street performer Peter just as much as him being in the circus!! He would decimate people in break dancing and magic tricks using his stickiness!! Peter could totally wow audiences by juggling stuff like knives too!

I love torturing Dick with parallels just as I do with much Peter. Dick, seeing a homeless, witty orphan moving with the grace of an acrobat and wanting to take him home and feed him,,, only to find out, holy shit, the sassy kid who juggles knives is actually his??? If he wasn't already a mother hen before, paternal instincts have intensified it by 200%.

[bigidiotenergytm]

Is Hades adopting people question mark

he's been waiting for u to sign the adoption papers actually

[frownyalfred]

Your headcanon about Bruce killing previously is parallel to one of mine where someone watches him like casually dismantle a dead body -for whatever reason- and are horrified by how casual he is about it and he’s like, the reason I don’t kill isn’t cause I can’t handle it it’s cause I’d be realllllyyy good at it

Bonus points if that horrified person is Clark, who has to watch Bruce break down a body piece by piece (for case reasons).

Clark: wait…why do you know how to do this?

Bruce, shrugging, blood streaked across his face: after a while it just becomes routine

Clark: after a WHILE?

[cuppajj]

I’m a little nervous to ask this so that’s why I’m anonymous but I’m writing a OC x Frigid Cacao Cookie fanfic and I’m struggling with his characterization and would love for some clarification on his characterization!

My questions are, when Frigid Cacao speaks, is his voice booming and loud or almost a cold whisper since he doesn’t say much?

Does he like eye contact or is he not about eye contact?

Does he speak when he has too or not at all?

This might get into spoiler like territory, don’t have to ask if it’s getting into SAVE THIS FOR ANOTHER TIME! But what is the state of Frigid Cacao’s kingdom?

Is his kingdom half consumed by a permafrost, most of the residents of his kingdom live within the citadel, trying to maintain some type of normalcy? Or did I get that from somewhere else-

Any other character information about Frigid Cacao Cookie would be nice!

The fanfic is inspired by a post you made a year ago, Reader x The Beasts Ancients! Thank you and I love your AU and your art is very beautiful!

I’ll turn this into a general post on how to write Frigid Cacao:

General: Frigid Cacao’s beast of Solitude for a reason. He’s admittedly hard to write interactions with if you’re anyone outside of the Second Watcher, because his deal is that no one really knows what’s happened to him, and he doesn’t let most into the throne room. Interactions with him are more likely outside, on the few occasions he steps out of that room and walks around the citadel.

Behavior: Frigid Cacao doesn’t do a lot. He’s on his throne all day, so motionless that he looks part of the throne itself. On few occasions he does get up and leave the room, and when he does, he prefers to be alone. His movements are slow, and while his footsteps are usually audible, they aren’t always. Write him like one would an apparition, I’d say; sometimes there, not always, and suddenly disappearing with or without knowing you were there. You can tell there’s a lot in his mind, and he prefers to be in his mind rather than interacting with the world around him. He’s almost always in his cloak; it’s usually a good day when he’s not, and he looks to be the same cookie as he’s always been. The shadow over his eyes never disappears, though. On a normal day, he’s not doing anything. On a good day, he might walk around. If he’s not walking around, he’s on his throne. If he’s on his throne, he’s not doing anything. And if he’s not doing anything, then he’s lost in his head. And sometimes he’s hungry.

Speech: When writing him, keep in mind that he speaks very, very rarely (so much so that I prefer to say he doesn’t at all). This includes settings like his citadel and neobeast meetings, even one on one with others. He prefers to gesture (with his head more than his hands) or make low sighs/noises. Cacao is more likely to speak when he believes it important enough to, but even that is rare. When he does speak, it’s barely above a whisper, and it sounds ghastly low. He doesn’t yell, not unless he is already in a fierce mood; more on that later. If you want to write him interacting with someone, it’s more in character for him not to speak - but if you really want him to, save it for a really important moment! (A little reference: Cacao still doesn’t speak when with Midnight Lily, the one and perhaps only neobeast he’s still fond of. At most, he says one thing.)

Expressions: None, 9 times out of 10. The face I draw him with is the one he has almost every waking moment! He doesn’t smile, much less laugh. If there’s any different expression he makes, it’s likely an agitated grit. However, there are some moments when his face can look a little softer, and one or both of his eyes will be visible from under the thick shadow. This post is a good reference

Others: His guard, including his advisors and soldiers, are essentially left in the dark. They’re bewildered, anxious, and they’ve learned little of what happened to their king. The First Watcher (formerly Second Watcher from the canon game) is the closest to him, an advisor in himself; and while he knows the most information about Cacao than anyone else, he’s just as clueless about what goes on inside his head. Everyone has their theories, and they believe something about the licorice, Choco, or the war have something to do with it; but they prefer to worry less about why things happened, and instead focus on managing new things as they happen. They have a special operation for when Cacao leaves the throne room, so that they may be there for him if he requires it. They still do their best to remain strong and uphold their loyalty to him, and are ready to serve him if he needs them. Whenever that will be…

Choco: Don’t mention him. The Cacaoians learned very quickly not to bring up the prince, as it seems to trigger the beast into a frantic and enraged state. Fortunately, Cacao often knows when his son’s name is about to be uttered, so it’s more likely that he’ll simply scare a person silent with his sharp leer and extreme drop in room temperature. But still - you are asking for trouble if you decide to mention his son.

Kingdom: Mostly everything but the citadel is encased in permafrost, including Cacaoian citizens. It’s unclear whether they’re dead or alive, but whatever ice is preserving them can’t be thawed. The remaining Cacaoians in the kingdom live in the citadel, but the vast majority of them are Cacao’s own guard. Very few are actual citizens (however, citizens were able to flee when the kingdom froze over. While scattering to the winds, a big chunk of them fell in with Celestial Cheese for protection). It’s quiet and buffeted by a near permanent snowstorm, with licorice creatures freely moving about. Cacao himself steps outside on some days to observe what’s been frozen over, disappearing in and out of the fog like a specter. The Licorice Sea, meanwhile, is the calmest it’s ever been.

Basically: Frigid Cacao is less Dark Cacao, more Indecipherable Being. A quiet, expressionless entity that prefers actions over words. His slow and methodical gestures do the speaking for him, which leaves those closest to him to wonder what he’s truly thinking or asking. It takes a lot for him to be verbal, and it’s likely to be only a few words in an important moment. There are echoes of his old self that show, things that the Cacaoians left still hold onto in their king, but it’s far from enough. His two other main emotions are agitation and rage, and those only really happen if he’s reminded of his son. If you want to write a character interacting with him, just know it’s like speaking to a wall most the time. They aren’t going to hear anything, unless the situation is something Cacao thinks is worth speaking for. Usually, it’s an order; very rarely is it anything personal. even if he’s with someone he cares about. There’s a solemnity in his character that makes him hard to approach, which is why the others tend to let him do his own thing and be there for him if he needs them. There’s not much they can do about the permafrost — they don’t even know if Cacao is why it happened — they can only hope things get better.

Cacao does his own thing, and he does it alone… that’s Solitude!

[somegrumpynerd]

Epic would try to make a good first impression with his best bros boss, but nightmare is a little distracted with the smell(?) of nightmares and sleep deprivation on him

Anon you are so right, he'd wanna make a great impression on Cross's weird employer/ adopter situation but there's no way he can hide the terrible state of his mental health

Cross thinks the meeting didn't go well because Nightmare couldn't understand a word Epic said. Nightmare thinks the meeting didn't go well because he was so distracted by how much repressed negativity this guy was putting out. Epic thinks the meeting went great 👍

Honestly Nightmare wouldn't care anyway, he doesn't think it's any of his business who Cross is friends with as long as he's happy. His boys are adults, they don't need his permission for anything* as far as he's concerned, but he probably will ask about Epic from time to time after this...

[talentlesshuman]

do you ever draw fat people

Indeed I do! Here are the ones i was able to find right away. Similar to how I don’t draw a lot of mascs or muscles, the opportunity to draw fat people doesn’t come up very much when I’m drawing fanart or personal art. I make fat ocs and adopts, but i haven’t really been drawing anything other than myself and friends for personal art these days.

I’m actually quite passionate about drawing fat people (similar to how I am passionate about drawing diverse skin and hair types), and have reservations about how much i see other depictions of fat people where- sure, I wouldn’t consider them skinny, but- they still have a very slim face, skinny neck, and overall hourglass shape. I think it’s still a step in the right directio for accepting fatness, but it would be nice to see more representation for double chins and stuff.

[batsandbirdbrains]

ok ok i love ur last post about dick being the youngest besides damian and him taking the mantle of batman when he’s 16. but i’m wondering does steph or cass take custody of them? does dick emancipate himself and take custody of damian? idk there’s something i love about the father&son dynamic that dick and damian have and i think it would be so interesting to explore in this AU. Maybe Steph and Cass are their older sisters, but Dick and Damian still have a father and son relationship because Dick wants Damian to have a good father, and lord knows that Bruce, Jason, and Tim aren’t willing to be that for him. Maybe when Tim brings Bruce back Dick has just turned 18, and has taken control over W.E., and taken custody of Damian. They all expect for him to relent and give Bruce the company and Damian back, but he doesn’t. Cass and Steph (and maybe Alfred?) all back him up. Even Talia, who never liked Dick, approves because she saw how they treated Dick and attempted to treat Damian and she was just relieved that someone was trying to cherish her Damian. Maybe Dick only gives Batman back to Bruce but keeps everything else, and even then everyone thought Dick was doing a better job as Batman. Maybe Bruce tries to force Damian to relinquish Robin so that Tim can be Robin again, so Dick and Damian become Nightwing and Flamebird. Maybe Bruce and everyone finally gets a wake up call when they realize how much Dick and Damian flourish without them, and how much good they’ve accomplished without them.

Also I’d love to see how this AU’s Teen Titans would react to all of this. I’d like to headcanon that the Titans are still like maybe 1-2 years older than Dick, which would make them a few years younger than Jason and Tim. Maybe at first they’re caught up on the cooler, older superheroes who can drive and drink and smoke and do other stuff that they’re not allowed to do yet. But then they start to realize that Tim and Jason are kind of assholes. They make Dick cry. They bully him over things like his name, his costume, his quirks, and all the other things that make him who he is. They watch their ball of sunshine slowly retreat in on himself and suddenly they’re out for blood. I want Tim and Jason to be a bit oblivious to this at first, and when they realize they don’t think much of it. They think the other heroes hate them cuz they’re bats or cuz they’re jealous. Then once Bruce comes back from the timestream, they realize that nobody likes them. Not just the other heroes, the villains of Gotham seem to harbor a special hatred for them specifically that they don’t have for Steph, Cass, Dick, or Damian. The police is wary at best around them, but outright hostile and angry with them most of the time. Even the civilians and other people of Gotham give them side eyes and frowns. But Dick, Damian, and Steph? They’re met with smiles, laughter, and trust (Cass doesn’t get anything because nobody even notices her, she’s a shadow in the night). The villains seem more annoyed and playful than outright hateful with them. The police are always willing to cooperate with them and have far more patience for them. It’s only Tim, Bruce, and Jason that people seem to hate.

OOOOOH ok Bonus: Duke comes along (aged up a bit), and Dick finally gets to experience what an actual big brother is like.

Despite having been kicked out at 13 and bouncing from couch to couch between Titans Tower, his friends’ homes, and the homes of other JL members, Bruce never actually relinquished custody of Dick. He never took him out of his will. Despite claiming that Jason and Tim were better Robins than he was, he still kept Dick as his main heir for all of his fortune and the ownership of Wayne Enterprises. Dick doesn’t know why. He didn’t even know about it until Bruce was considered dead.

So Dick becomes emancipated. Some members of the JL who have connections help push it through, and then he gets custody of Damian. It’s unusual, but they get it done. Neither Tim nor Jason offer to take custody of either of them. It’s fine though, Dick and Damian want nothing to do with them anyway.

So Dick takes custody of Damian, gives him Robin, goes out as Batman, and takes on the responsibility of running WE as best as a 16 year old can. Lucius Fox helps him a lot. He’d always liked Dick. Dick also graduates school early, and he takes college classes on the side. He’s technically enrolled in Gotham City University.

It’s a lot for a 16 year old. Alfred, in this scenario, I think would retire upon Bruce’s death. Maybe he was never particularly close with any of the kids, and so once Bruce was gone, so was he.

Stephanie, upon seeing how her ex boyfriend treated his little brothers, was disgusted with him. She was actually pretty fond of Dick, she thought he was funny and quippy and a good kid. So she shows up, and she can tell Dick is wary about her, that he doesn’t let her interact with Damian often, but she proves herself to be totally unlike Tim. The three of them get along swimmingly, it turns out. Stephanie becomes something of a big sister to both of them, but she doesn’t try to tell them what to do. She respects the fact that Dick has custody of Damian, she never tries to overstep how Dick tries to raise him. She offers support and suggestions when he asks for it, but never gives unsolicited advice. She knows Dick doesn’t like it, that he takes it as criticism, because that’s how Bruce, Jason, and Tim always spoke to him.

When Bruce comes back a couple years later, he tries to take custody back of Damian. But Damian refuses. Dick refuses. Dick is legally an adult now, he’s been Damian’s guardian longer than Bruce was, and they manage to have enough connection on the inside to prevent Bruce from taking custody of Damian away from Dick.

Dick and Damian move permanently to Blüdhaven, but Damian keeps the name Robin. Because Robin isn’t Batman’s, Damian is adamant about that. He refuses to relinquish it back to Tim. Robin is Dick’s name, it’s his legacy, and it’s his decision who gets to be called Robin. Dick chose Damian. Damian will tell that to anyone and everyone.

So Nightwing and Robin soar the rooftops of Blüdhaven. Damian attends a fancy private school in Blüdhaven that has an excellent art program, Dick did a lot of research on it. Dick continues his college classes entirely online. Anything he can’t take online, he takes at Blüdhaven State University and transfers the credits. Dick is also still heavily involved in WE, even if Bruce takes back the title of CEO. The Board actually likes Dick better, anyway.

Tim and Jason are convinced that the others in the hero community don’t like them because they’re bats. Because they’re jealous. Because they’re better than them so everyone else must be intimidated.

But then Duke joins the family. Bruce recruits Duke to join the bats when he’s 25, and he becomes Signal, and everyone else warms up to him right away. They can’t figure out what’s different.

The difference is that Dick and Damian relay how Duke treats them. Because for the first time, Dick knows what a big brother is actually supposed to be like. Duke doesn’t bully him. Doesn’t belittle him. Doesn’t harass him.

Duke may be an adult already, but he becomes sort of the family. He’s 5 years older than Dick, he’s a year or so younger than Jason and Tim. Dick is convinced that he’ll get along with Jason and Tim better, because Dick has had terrible luck with big brothers, and he doesn’t have much hope.

But Duke wants to get to know him. Duke spends time with him and Damian, doesn’t treat them like outcasts. It’s so different that Dick isn’t quite sure how to react at first.

It’s Stephanie who coaxes Dick to trust Duke, who helps him get over his trepidation of Duke joining the family.

Idk idk I like this a lot I like this whole possible world it’s fascinating.

[yayll]

omg PLSPLSPLS GIVE US GIRLDAD!DAZAI!!! Im literally so obsessed w ur work and luv luv luv reading it <3

just wanna say thank u so much anon for sending in the CUTEST request ever i have never thought abt it this way and when i finally did it was over for me. it wrote itself. THANK U FOR LIKING MY WORK THATS SO SWEET AHHH :') i keep getting ill so srry it's a lil late but i am so thankful for you trusting me w ur concept. mwahhhh.

~ a little something about girldad!Dazai simply trying his best, and loving it ~

Dazai never thought the day would come when his life finally felt complete. First, you happened to him and that was something he couldn't even fathom in a million lifetimes. It wasn't meant for him, and letting love into his heart felt like going against the nature of things. He struggled with it for a long time, pushing you away and making sure you realized this wasn't something worth pursuing... but you never relented, and he stopped fighting the longing for something more. You made him feel it was okay to want, to yearn, to need. And so came along every single repressed desire he had ever had. The love between you bloomed, and he thought this was the height of it all; The bandages he wore over his body were no longer grim reminders of his lack of humanity and the masks he wore on the daily. Those frayed wraps of fabric were symbols of love returning, of patience, of a lived in soul, and he no longer had to maintain them alone. He had you.

And then one day, he suddenly had a little girl in his life.

Another life to nurture and to start anew with, and his fear was that he yet again could not redeem himself from his past, but he was determined for her, for you and for himself to not let that be the case. When you gave him the most precious thing he didn't think he ever wanted nor could ever have, that was the day he vowed to be the epitome of a true figure worth looking up to. Osamu Dazai, the family man! Dad of the year!

... Except today, when he woke up late to take the apple of his eye to preschool. You were out of town, and though you eventually claimed to have faith in his solo parenting skills, it was a complete leap of faith. He comforted you for hours, how hard could it be? He can be both parents at once! How cruel of you to even doubt him. He remembers the look on your face when he slammed the door on you while holding your precious angel in his arms, both of them giggling while they waved you off as if they rehearsed it.

Aaaand now he realized why you were so worried. He looks at the time and he springs out of bed, running off to her bedroom. She even sleeps like a little lamb, he thinks to himself. He rushes at her side and softly turns her over.

"Little love, wake uuupppp..."

She pouts, shaking her head as she shifts in her sleep. He sighs and tries again a little more desperately.

"If you wake up, that will be really good for daddy, otherwise mommy will kill me! Up we go!"

He picks her up, and she rubs her eyes as Dazai does the most rushed morning routine ever.

He gets her dressed, though the socks don't match, and when he does her pigtails, they're lopsided. How do you do it?! And now he has to FEED her?! He stuffs a few handfuls of cereal into his mouth while giving her a proper bowl, but they're so late he thinks they should just start walking now.

"Take the bowl with you, we can do this thing called eat and walk! Yes?"

"'Kay, daddy!"

She simply giggles, not understanding how dire it is for her to make it today. She holds onto her cereal bowl as he grabs her backpack, both of them walking out into the street. Dazai's fast walking and her bowl sloshes a bit as she tries to match his pace and eat at the same time.

She's waddling adorably, and he gets lost in watching her carefully while also literally getting lost finding the school. He stops at the crosswalk, and thinks to himself. She looks up at him with a milk mustache, and her soft melodic voice rings once more like a voice of reason. She points to the right.

"That way! hehe."

Dazai has no time to fact check this, and at this point she's parenting him. You'd pass out of laughter if you could see him right now. They rush towards the school, and when he drops her off at the gate, he gives her a big kiss on her forehead.

"I love you, okay? Now give daddy the cereal bowl. How yum was that?"

She cheers, smiling wide.

"Yum!!!!"

He smirks, and takes the bowl. At least he got that right, that smile alone is worth every late start to his mornings. He waves at her as she enters the school, and forgets he's holding the bowl still, her teacher looking at him like he's deranged. You were so proud to hear that his first time parenting alone went so smooth! What you didn't know was that your little girl did most of the work keeping him on track. Still counts, right?

Another time he was exemplary was when he had just given her a bath and you were supervising to make sure he got her routine down.

"Osamu, that's the conditioner. The shampoo is over there."

You laugh while pointing at the clearly marked bottle. He rolls his eyes, smirking as he continues to rub it in her little swirl of dark hair.

"Oh please, I knew that. This makes it soft! And all detangled... It's a better routine, trust me. This is so much better."

He was totally bullshitting, he had no idea there was more than one hair product ever. This is the same man who used to find showers foreign and eat canned crab for every meal. You simply nodded, seeing right through his facade. But it was all so endearing watching your daughter splash the water on his face and play with rubber duckies, it was a dream come true. It was a dream you knew was more precious to him than anything, so you let him have his fun.

Once bath time is over, he places her on the bed in her diaper and walks out to grab her a change of clothes. Uh oh, he forgot today was laundry day! He walks back into the room a few moments later, thinking of how to pivot without having to bother you when he sees his little angel wrapped head to toe in a full roll of his bandages. His eyes go wide at the sight of the wrapped up toddler, and he laughs nervously as he rushes over while she has the time of her life squealing and rolling around the bed. He pretends to be mad.

"Little love! That's not clothes, silly! That's for daddy only, you have your own."

She simply disregards this, her mind focusing on how hilarious it would be if she just started making bubbles with her saliva instead. Dazai chuckles again, and puts his hands on his hips.

"Oh, such attitude! You know, l'm gonna have to do it... Remember when I told you about daddy's old job? I'm gonna have to get mean againnn..~"

He immediately launches himself onto the bed, tickling her through the thick fabric, and when you rush over you find them both just collapsed on the bed, Dazai counting her fingers and toes in order to distract her enough to unwrap her. Luckily, you had a spare onesie for her to save the day... even if it took the both of you to get her out of her improvised outfit. What a strong willed little one! You hoped this wasn't a special abillity developing...

It's no surprise she's a daddy's girl either, a mini Dazai at her core with your balancing characteristics on the surface. She was a little menace, sticking her tongue out at dogs every time she saw them because Dazai would do the same. He would even go as far as to help her dress like her hero! Of course you both had a stroke when you saw how tightly she wore that bolo tie, but the laugh after was worth the worry... After you scolded both of them... but it proved useless against two of the most experienced charmers you've ever met. You just couldn't win.

You especially could never get used to the sight after a long day of existing in the real world, simply watching her climb up to the couch and playing with Dazai's hair as she nuzzles herself into his shoulder, right in the crook of his neck. It was just as intense for his poor little heart as well. The way she'd yank on a strand while he pretended to be asleep was priceless, or when she'd stick her finger in his nose, causing him to have a sneezing fit soon after. It was almost karmic the way she both adored him and put him in his place, just like you.

"Daddy has brown hair because he drinks chocolate milk."

"Daddy stinks today. Throw him away!"

"Daddy looks like a mummy. Do you like mummies?"

"Who's Kunikida? He yelled at daddy today, it was funny!"

She'd babble on about all kinds of curious nonsense. You'd simply nod and agree. She was never wrong!

But what really got to you was watching her pass out on his head after hours of playtime, and the way Dazai would finally open his eyes with that smug smile of his, scooping her up and carefully taking her to bed. He tucks her in, whispering about all the adventures they'll have tomorrow and the days after. About all the rules they'll break together, and mysteries they'll solve when he takes her to work with him. He doesn't tell bedtime stories per se, but he spends all his time having actual conversations with her until she dozes off because he cannot believe this is a little extension of him and he's just as fascinated with knowing her the way she is with him. With life.

She's full of it, something he wasn't for a long time, and it brings him to tears when he sometimes thinks about it too long in private.

You're both his life and he didn't realize he could still feel regret like he does when he thinks of all the times he spent trying to end his own existence. It's a whole different world, and sure, he also loves to use her as an excuse to continue to slack off at work, and maaaybe he likes to sometimes force Atsushi to turn so she can pet him like the giant cat he is out of both their own entertainment, but dying is no longer the priority. It hasn't been for a long time, and he thinks he's doing an okay job... At being a dad, at being a human, at belonging in this world.

When he finally gets in bed with you, he feels whole. He also feels impish when he turns over and whispers.

"Maybe it's time for another, hm?~"

Oops!

[demonic0angel]

DC x DP Prompt: Via shenanigans, Stephanie Brown gets adopted by the Fentons.

(Honestly, I didn’t answer this ask for the longest time bc I had no idea where to start or where to go.)

Stephanie blinked. “Wait… you’re adopting me?”

They all nodded. All four members of the Fenton family, who was getting famous in Gotham for being such perfect Gotham weirdos that they were being used in social media videos as what to do when visiting the city, nodded at her sagely, looking perfectly serene.

Stephanie looked around for a camera. Was she on Pranked or something? This couldn’t have been real.

“Wait… but I have a mom!” She said, suddenly remembering why she had never been adopted before. Which was ridiculous, but this entire situation was absurd, so sue her for forgetting simple facts.

The man, clad in an orange jumpsuit and who was the biggest man she had ever seen, smiled and clapped a broad hand on her shoulder.

“Don’t worry. We’ll adopt her too.”

“????!”

[taygra5shaon]

For the adopted au do durge and gortash still get together? If so does papa Ketheric find out and scold them XDD

the difficult times when your children go into puberty and hormones rules them.

ketheric have a bad experience with his children been in love, now he try a new way to deal with two highly horny teenagers.

lol

[alicepooryorick]

hey can you do some canon accurate arguing as to how steph would be adopted by batman, cause i want to and I am too uneducated and non-cool to do so myself (as in how he'd justify it to himself but the other side would be fun too)

Oh god. Genuinely I don't know how the fuck it'd happen, like legitimately. Not only do you need Stephanie to agree to it, but you know... Bruce too.

Genuinely the way this man treated her until she kinda just... Became under Babs' eye... Was pretty bad. But before that she was with Tim.

There's also the issue of even if he wanted to, Steph has a mom. That she loves. And for secondary parental figures she has Babs. She has genuinely two fully functional parental figures in her life, Babs even invalidates the "she'd do it for the money" argument.

I think the best way to explain Bruce adopting Steph, and I mean this with full sincerity, is to do it JUST to keep Cass and Steph from getting together.

[bigidiotenergytm]

How would fmtd Ody react to a distressed/crying child? if you want a specific situation; let's say he's going somewhere when he just so happens to notice a child crying probably lost and hurt.

he'd comfort them and try to find their parent(s) immediately. if he can't manage to do it himself he'd bring them to the closest police station to handle. but still stick around until they find their family at the very least.

[demonstars]

wait farfa is cute. i haven’t seen him until now

FARFA: Hi I'm selling socks, the pair for 200 pesos, please. PIRU: Bro, you came in so fancy. FARFA: How could I not? Hi [chat]

YOU WILL LOOK AT MY BABY.