#and at some point i had to switch apps to look up a word

[sh1-n0bu]

imagine dating an older man this, imagine dating an older woman that COWARDS🗣️ imagine being an older woman and having a younger guy astronomically DOWN BAD (for all intents and purposes, this is a joke. i am not an older woman, nor am i shitting on ppl who love aforementioned relationship dynamics, this is just a horndogged thought)

imagine being an older woman, who never really saw the appeal in romantic or sexual relationships, only focusing on what was ahead of you. the job, adventures of life, education, academic achievements and your own personal hobbies, pastime enjoyments and relationships other than the romantic or sexual ones. there was more to world and life than just that after all, even though your friends’ nagging of when you will reveal the secret guy, or when you will find someone to settle down etc rang out during nearly every night outs, surely giving you a grey strand or few. really, you just… weren’t interested at all. there were rarely anyone who caught your attention and those who did were only appealing to the eyes rather than the heart

sure, there were some boys who would saunter up to you at the bar or cafe with their smug little faces and annoying attitudes, talking some shit about how they like their women like a silver fox, talking about how you were a beekeeping age, or even the stupid ‘i like my woman who are as old as my momma’. useless little things being said as a means to get a single night stand. you’d always tell them off with some backhanded insult, sharp words or how this wasn’t the predator franchise

one thing led to another and one of your closest and longest lasting friend had downloaded a dating app on your phone for you. something something about how you were in the perfect age to settle down now and if not, at least go out on a romantic date for once rather than taking yourself out on dates or with the ladies. you decided to humor them, keeping the app and adding very minimum information about yourself, work, hobbies and what not before kicking the acknowledgement of the app’s existence into the back of your mind

many DMs and snaps were sent to you of course, the usual beekeeping age bullshit. the rare few men who would be around your age range would end up being married, had a fiancée or in an odd form of relationship. you made sure to get their partners’ phone number and name before blocking them, calling them or texting them to notify them that their partner was a cheating bastard and had a dating app. “it’s their relationship, not yours!” most would say, but ladies gotta look out for one another in your opinion. made a pretty few sweet friends that way too

it was one of your slow and peaceful weekends when your phone dinged, another DM text in that accursed dating app. though instead of the usual annoying half-assed flirts or dick pics, it was a simple compliment. ‘good eve, ma’am. i just wanted to say that you look breathtaking. have a nice night, ma’am’ was all it said, a reply to one of the pictures you had added to the app for the introduction part. surprisingly straight to the point and respectful, so with a shrug and a ‘might as well give it a shot’ thought, you messaged back with some words of gratitude. something that quickly derailed into a nice normal conversation and getting to know each other texts. checking his profile, you found out that he was basically in the same position as you. forced by some of his friends to grow outside his shell, few pictures and simple descriptions, just a few years younger. safe to say, he was your first match in that damn app

life continued on, weekdays and weekends switching in their endless circle and you and your dating app friend had gotten close. it truly did felt like he was a nice mannered young man and when he asked if you would be willing to go out on a date, you agreed. nothing wrong with putting the dating app to its original intents and purposes. he was sweet, planned nearly everything with your added thoughts and preferences and had let you enjoy a nice dinner date, all freshened up and smelling of a sweet cologne with a decent suit. perhaps this whole dating app thing was a good idea after all, even as he stuttered sometimes and tripped over his words upon seeing how gorgeous you were, you thought of him as oddly cute

one dinner date turned into a few dates, then park, movie and hobby dates and before you two had known it, the whole thing had shifted smoothly into a relationship. things taken slowly at your own preferred pace, no use of rushing or getting down and dirty. it was a good relationship and possibly the best one you had so far, you'd wager. even your sweet boyfriend - as much as you both occasionally laugh and joke how it was unfitting and even a little bit young and childish for your age - had gotten used to this shift in life, comfortable with making you breakfast in bed on the days you have a work off or just sleeping in, making your coffee just the way you like, eggs cooked to fit your needs on a crispy toast, a pancake, with an adorably whipped cream drawn smiley face. it was just perfect

but of course, there were the occasional moments when your boyfriend nearly destroyed these perfect moments — at least, in his opinion. waking up in the morning before you, and seeing your sleeping face, all peaceful and calm with the grey streaks in your hair and the laugh lines on your face did things to him. you just looked so ethereal, basking in the glow of the morning sunlight, like the reincarnation of aphrodite. and before he knew it, he had a morning wood, quickly scuffling out of bed and towards to bathroom to take care of his problem before you woke up

or when you’re showing him the latest dress you bought, or any clothes really, just peacefully showing him what it looked like on you as you twirled in front of him and gods, you were so breathtaking. all he could do was just nod dumbly like the lovesick puppy he was as a weak ‘uh-huh’ escaped his lips. oh, the little pooch of your tummy, the rolls on your sides, the love handle, the hipdip — whatever these things were called, good god, he wanted nothing more than to just slink down from the couch onto his knees and politely ask to bury his face into them. let him touch them, the little fats on your body, the rolls, the pooch. he’ll lovingly caress them and your stretch marks and everything with reverence

or when you’re testing your new lipsticks on his face, applying the newly bought make up on your gorgeous, kissable lips before smooching him on the face, turning him more and more into a painting of your doing while he drunkenly sits there on the couch with a stupid fucking smile. oh no, this one wasn’t kiss proof either, better try all of them and see if they’re kiss proof too. oh he was covered in lipstick? don’t worry, nothing big. he’s just too busy admiring you and occasionally wondering how the color would look in its perfect kiss shape on his leaking dick while you mocked him for being a horny dog

maybe he slipped up one day, instead of thanking you usually with the sweet nickname after you had done fixing his tie for him, just idiotically smiling at you as a “thank you, mistress” dropped from his lips. an immediate freeze and after a moment, his face was turning red with an embarrassed apology after apology while he hid his face into the crook of your neck. not like you minded too much, just laughing and patting him on the back, reassuring him that it was fine, mistakes happened. though, you won’t lie, it was adorable in the sexy way on how he just let that slip out

ever since that little incident, your sweet boyfriend’s longing grew worse and worse. their hands started to wander more, squeezing, pinching and pawing hopelessly against the fat rolls of your tummy or gripping at your love handles with an eagerness of a puppy whenever they came to stand behind you while you made dinner. damn near sliding towards you on their knees to help you put on your shoes before you leave the house for work and have mercy on him if you choose to wear high heels that day, placing your heel between his thighs while his other hand gently guided your leg by the ankle to slip into the heel. he thought he was being slick but no, you caught it all. of course you would, he was damn near whimpering nowadays every time you come home all exhausted and collapse onto the couch, scrambling over and getting on his knees to massage your tired feet while his adam’s apple bobs while staring at your meaty thighs, mindlessly nodding and going “uh-huh” while you ramble about your day while your pretty boyfriend just wishes he was that goddamn stockings, snug around your legs

it was during one of these days that you decided to take pity on him — how could you not? his pathetic puppy eyes had you wrapped around his fingers — moving your leg out of his hands and instead hooking it over his shoulder. pulling him closer by your leg towards your thighs while you shift down more to place yourself closer to the edge of the couch. pretty eyes blinked up at you with a stuttered, “h-honey…?”, hands placed on his knees like the good boy he is while a pretty pink color bloomed on his cheeks. you just gave a roll of your hips on the couch, a sweet smile and a “my thighs feel exhausted too. help me out?” and he was immediately nodding his head vigorously, shaky hands grabbing and gently squeezing the fat while his breath grew shaky. god, he could see the lace edges of the stockings under your skirt now! and even more, he could see your panties. god help him, he was growing hard in his boxers like some stupid teenager seeing a woman’s boobs all over again

“a little bit up” you called out, watching his reactions with the same smile, lipstick covered lips spread wide on your face. your boyfriend whined instead of following through with your words, peering up at you through his pretty lashes. his hands pushed your skirt up, enough to take in your panties and stockings in full view as he gulped down his saliva, muttering out a weak “m-may i taste you, ma’am?”. the honorific instead of your name or the usual patnames just seem to fall from his lips so easily now, eyes constantly switching from your pretty face and colored lips and to your underwear and the fat of your thighs covered by the heavenly nylon

“you wanna taste me, pup?” you hum out, voice like a sweet honey or the finest red wine and have mercy on him, the idiot merely lost it right then and there, ready to lose any sense of dignity as he nods his head with an obedient “yes ma’am, i would like to taste you ma’am”. you simply cooed at his eager words, the leg thrown over his shoulder pulling him closer to the couch, closer to the heaven between your thighs as you balance your feet on his shoulder. he whined again at how you were teasing him, refusing to give him a solid answer and just toying with him like he was a canary trapped in the fangs of a cat. but he might as well be a willing canary that flew into the jaws of the feline with the way he cutely adds a final, “please allow me, ma’am…?” and damn near cheers a loud excited whoop when you nod at him, giving him the green lights

your boyfriend lets out a stuttered breath through his lips when he pulls down your panties, even folding them sweetly and placing them beside your legs on the couch like the sweet boy he is, when he sees your pussy, covered in the same color of bush as your hair. gulping again, he trails gentle kisses up your legs, from the lace ends of your stockings and up the bare skin of your legs, making sure to kiss the stretch marks he comes across before he finally nuzzles his face into your bushy mound. weakly, he licks at your folds, as if this was his first time eating out a woman and occasionally suckling at your clit. he was just so adorable with how he tenderly kisses and suckles and licks at you, like he had never felt the touch of a woman. so when your hands grasps at his hair, scratching at his scalp once before pulling him flush against your pussy, he downright moans against you before diving in like it was his final food. slurping at your wetness and eating you out like you were his last meal while his two fingers pushed your labia open, whimpering out words of “t-thank you, ma’am, thank yo-you for letting me touch you” and “you taste mmgh so sweet, ma’am.. i aamgh l-love your pussy juice s’much”

when you do cum into his mouth after his excited tongue and finger fucking you open, he opens his mouth eagerly to taste every single drop of your sweet pussy juice, already addicted to the taste and scent of it from just a single taste. his fingers continue to massage your soft walls, thumb swirling over your clit in gentle motions while his free hand pushed down on your lower tummy, pleading you to cum again and to get his face wet with your slick like he was some pathetic toy for you. only when you patted his head at last with a “good job, pretty boy” did he pull his fingers away — albeit with heavy disappointment — as he drawled out “th-thank you, missus. i’m glad to be-be of use to my missus” with his lips and jaws dripping with some of your cum. you laughed at seeing that look on his face, pupils blown wide, cheeks flushed and his hair a mess with your slick all over his jaw. seems like your pretty boy was a messy eater

first time writing smut for my female readers, this was truly a shift in my writing ngl. as you can tell from the smuts on my blog, im more comfortable writing for a gender neutral reader, top reader and im sure most — or at least half — of my readers feel comfortable with that norm as well. but lately cough cough a bit of rp on c.ai with cod character bots with my older oc cough cough ive gotten addicted to the thought of being an older woman and having a younger man just whipped for you and decided to challenge myself with writing for a femdom reader. and by younger, i mean within a decade of years age gap, preferably within 5 years even. nothing too serious. hope you all liked this small brainrot and the dividers belong to @/cafekitsune

[cottagecore-moss-king]

Not so Artificial Intelligence

Inspired by This prompt: HERE  by @corkinavoid No beta we die like Danny and Jason. Do not steal, take, or repost my writing without permission, I do not consent to my art being used in AI training. 

Tim had just finished attaching the wires of the speaker into the bat computer for Betty when the speakers began to crackle. 

“What is this? Wait, can you hear me?” The voice that echoed out of the speakers was very distinctly not robotic, or mechanical. It very much had human intonation… and a mid-western accent???

The gathered family froze and stared in shock. Dick and Stephanie were here as a joke, Babs, Tim, and Bruce were there as the techies, and despite Damian’s protests, he was also standing besides Bruce. Despite the gathering of bats, none of them could have expected this. A few hands went to emergency beacons and cellphones, before pausing.

“Hello Red Robin!” The voice cheerfully called. Taking steps back and glancing around the cave at Babs, who stared at Bruce, who stared at Tim as he clicked his super beacon. 

“Betty?”

“I mean, you do know me as such, but I actually prefer Danny, he/they.” Babs pointed at Bruce, who looked at Tim, who lamely motioned towards Babs. 

“Who uh. Who installed you?” His voice was most certainly not squeaky thanks for asking. 

“Oh, well uh, technically no-one, I accidentally did it myself.” The screen turned on and started to glitch out to a camera. It eventually settled on the sketching program, which popped a smiley face onto itself.

“Who are you” Bruce growled, as he switched into batman mode. Damian was glaring at the screen and the rest of the family had inched into a defensive formation. 

The entrance door entered and Superman walked out of it. 

“What seems to be the issue B?”

“OMG It’s superman! You’re like, my second favorite hero!”

“Oh, uh, than-er” Bruce glared at him, with no idea of what this entity was, it was always a good idea to follow fey rules. “That’s very much appreciated. Who is your first?”

“Martian Manhunter obviously.” Betty, or Danny as they were now referred to as, began to sketch out something on the app. 

“I got into a fight with a technomancer. I figured I could just phase out but he did some magic and now I’m stuck. Very rude if you ask me.”

“Ah, I see.” Supermans face implied that he very much did not see. “So, are you a martian perhaps? With the phasing and Manhunter as your favoratie.”

“Oh no, I’m ahhhh….” The cheery tone died as Danny tried to find the words, “I’m like a spirit, yeah, I guess that’s the right way to put it right now.”

“Were you human before this?” butted in Tim. Now that the seeming threat had passed, (you could never be too careful, no shut up Nightwing he is not paranoid, just cautious) the family had relaxed their stance and Barbra had rolled over to the computer screen. 

“Technically???” 

Danny did not sound so sure of himself.

“It’s not a problem if you aren’t, you can tell that we don’t really care if you are human or not.” 

Superman floated carefully down to the ground besides Bruce, but without actually touching down. Perhaps he simply forgot that they were friends with non-humans.

“Tell that to the gov.” he snarked back, and that was definitely teenager snark. 

“Wait shit. No, no no no, I take that back, don’t tell the government anything, I didn’t say nothin’!” he gasped and staticed out. 

“What do you mean tell it to the government?”

“NOPE, NUH UH. I DIDN’T SAY ANYTHING YOU CAN’T PROVE IT, I WANT MY LAWYER!”

“Alright,” Bruce pacified putting his hands up “Let me just call a friend and they can get you out.”

“Wait really? Where’s Mr. I’m so dark and broody tell me everything?”

Yep, that’s teenager snark right there, Bruce thought as his eye twitch and his kids snickered. 

“Sooo, how did this technomancer trap you, Danny?” Dick strolled over to the chair in front of the computer and flopped down spinning around in lazy circles. 

“Oh, well you see it started when…” Danny's voice faded off as Bruce took his league communicator out and stepped around a corner with Kal to call up Zatanna. 

“Hey Batman! What’s up?”

“We need you down in the batcave, some seemingly civilian has been trapped in the computer for a couple weeks now, and we’ve only just gotten into communication with them. They say it was technomancy.” He rumbled. He would have to suit up and manage to get Danny not to spill any of their identities, this just turned into a major headache to deal with. Batman hates magic. 

Once all of the children were suited up and Danny had been given an explanation, they were all patently waiting for Zatanna to arrive. 

The zeta tubes finally lit up with her arrival as she walked towards the gathered group holding her bag.

Halfway through greeting she paused, and stared blankly the screen. Everyone else shot curious glances, backwards, some more obvious than others. Did Nightwing seriously need to turn his head like that, he swears his eldest has bones, but sometimes he seriously starts to doubt himself. 

On the screen is a smiley face with a hand emoji. And a little drawing of a stick figure with white hair, green eyes, and a black suit. 

“Hello! I am Danny, I’m so sorry you had to come all this way to help me, I’d offer you something but I don’t even have a body right now.” One awkward laugh later, and Bruce wanted to have had his head in her hands. 

“I don’t worry, I can fix this. It’ll be a pain, but I can.”

While Zatanna sat up the spell and sent Kal out to go to Metropolis, (less suspicious for him to be buying things than Gotham), Bruce decided to stand around in the shadows while waiting to be useful. His kids, were off making friends with the strange person in the computer however. Laughing and teasing, he’s almost certain that Stephanie and Dick are trying to convince Danny to stay around and get adopted, despite Danny and Damian’s protests. 

After thirty minutes, Zatanna was ready to do the spell, and Danny was saying goodbye. 

As the light shone through the sigils written on the board and Zattana continued her muttering and waving, Danny added one last thing. 

“And I added a file of something for you guys to look at, please please please look into it! I hope I can see you soon!”

And with a final flash, Danny was gone, leaving the batfam without their lovely AI/new friend. Zatannna wrapped things up and Batman escorted her back to the Zeta tube with Clark, thanking them briefly. And with that, Clark and Zatanna left with Two flashes of light. 

Now, time to see what that file was that Danny had added. 

[amaryllis-3]

Word count: 2.1k

Pairing: John Price × Reader

Infos: Pregnancy, afab reader, mild possessive behavior near the end, mature and slightly dark themes

Based on this idea

As a member of Task Force 141, you'd dedicated your whole life to your team, to the Crown, and to the protection of international security. Going from home to work and from work to home had become the normality you'd learnt to accept.

It was nothing too tragic, truly.

When you were on duty, you didn't have time to worry about your decadent social circle, and when you were off deployment, you could always hit a pub with one of the lads. None of them would ever turn down an opportunity for a little distraction. Hell, you'd even started spending more time in the barracks than in your flat, to the point where the landlord questioned whether you'd died in action and he merely hadn't been informed about it.

Everything had been fine until, well, it no longer was.

Shrouded in the silence of your one-room apartment on a grey autumn day, you'd wondered what would be left of you after you inevitably ceased to be useful to the military. You'd probably be discharged with a respectful handshake, a few medals, and a good amount of money to spend the rest of your life doing... what exactly? Rot in loneliness?

No, you couldn't stand it, not anymore at least.

Those same circumstances you had considered acceptable and fulfilling suddenly seemed not to be enough. Perhaps you could have borne it in your early years of service, when your sole concern was coming home in one piece and making sure your comrades did the same.

But at the moment you had other needs. You were aware of it.

You'd wandered for a while in the dark searching for something that could help you feel complete — a sort of homemade spiritual journey with more failures than successes and the revelation you were seeking at the end.

You wanted a baby, desperately.

You'd never thought about motherhood before, and yet it had only taken the slightest nudge to turn it into the entire centre of your attention. It was as if a switch had been flipped in your head, triggering that innate and basic instinct to bring another creature into this world.

Shit, you had nothing ready to welcome your little angel.

The house you lived in was too small and in a part of town not ideal for easy access to schools.

Not to mention your job.

You clearly had to take a leave of absence. No matter how accustomed you were to injury, you wouldn't have tolerated the slightest chance of jeopardising your pregnancy.

You absolutely had to notify the higher-ups, or things were bound to get ugly. Money wasn't an issue with all you had saved, but it was possibly worth looking for a part-time job to support yourself in the meantime. All in all, it was better to be safe than sorry

Maybe, just maybe, you were moving things a smidge too fast. No, starting to buy baby clothes and toys was not a good idea because in your euphoric frenzy you'd forgotten a rather important detail.

You weren't in a relationship.

Now, that could have been a problem.

Your lifestyle wasn't helpful in keeping anything steady in the romance department. You could go on a mission and disappear for the next few weeks, if not months. You'd tried in the past (albeit, you must admit, with not too much effort), but balancing your various obligations had proved so stressful that you'd proudly declared yourself out of the market. Your new-found desire to start a family, though, would have forced you to return.

As resourceful as you may have been, it was going to be difficult to conceive a baby without a man to, you know, knock you up.

At that point, instead of getting on some dating app or throwing yourself into a classic blind date like a normal person, what had you done? Obviously, you'd gone to your captain, the man who had saved your life more times than you could have counted, dropping the bombshell he wouldn't have expected.

⎯⎯⎯ 「 𖤓 」⎯⎯⎯

"I want a baby," you announced the minute you entered his office, barely giving the door time to close behind you before you placed yourself in front of his desk. John's hand, which had been working on paperwork, froze in its movement, and his sterling blue eyes lifted to give you his full attention.

"Pardon?" His voice came out gruff and deep, words slipping out in a rush, as if his mind was not quite ready to digest what you had told him.

"I want a baby, Cap," you repeated unperturbed, shoulders squared, legs slightly apart, and back straight as a board. You were almost as confident in your stance as you were in your conviction.

Price's eyebrows furrowed, lips curled into a grimace that bordered on mockery. "Yeah... I heard that."

He hesitated, absentmindedly drumming his fingers on the wooden surface of the desk. "I was just wonderin' why you felt the need to share the ... news with me."

The man struggled to follow on which train of thought your brain had derailed.

What was this nonsense?

As far as he knew, you weren't in a relationship and didn't seem interested in one. At least, that was the reply you had given Soap when the Scot had pointed out your dry romantic situation.

Going from 0 to 100 wasn't anything foreign for you; he had learnt to deal with it, but this... was excessive even by your standards.

Had you met some bloke who had made you fall at his feet with honeyed words and pretty promises? No, you wouldn't have been fooled by it. Not his soldier. You were too mature for that shit, but John couldn't help the feeling of jealousy growing in the pit of his stomach.

"I'm telling you this because..." Your statement was enough to snap him out of the tunnel vision his stubborn self had coerced itself into; "...I need your help, to get one I mean."

The silence that spread through the office following your declaration was suffocating. You had mentally prepared for every possible reaction from him, yet seeing it actually happen was in no way comparable.

It wasn't the first time you had stood under Price's intense glare, not with how your relationship was set up. As much as he was your superior, you hadn't failed to make your opinion heard if something didn't sit well with you. You had never come close to insubordination, never really questioned his authority, but you certainly hadn't simply responded with a mere "aye, Cap'n" and carried on with your day.

It was an odd partnership, but it worked for both of you.

If John had to be honest, he viewed it as refreshing and somewhat fascinating. He was aware of how deep your loyalty ran — you'd have followed him down to hell if it had been necessary — so he could overlook your more colourful comments. Still, that didn't mean that he would spare you any of his warning stares.

He wasn't sure if you were playing a nasty prank on him. It wasn't like you, not about such personal matters anyway.

You probably weren't, if the determination and sheer earnestness flashing in your eyes could serve as an indication. That, though, led him to another, bigger problem: seriously consider what you were asking of him.

To state that, after all the years you had spent working shoulder to shoulder, Price had never thought of moving things to another level with you would have been a lie. He clearly found you attractive, and the chemistry between you two was undeniable. But hell, you worked so well in his team that he didn't feel like fucking it up simply for some of his urges.

Blurring the lines between work and love life could prove to be a minefield, a dangerous territory where it was difficult to venture.

You, however? Seemed more than willing to dive in like a suicidal maniac.

"You sure are somethin'." He exhaled, with a hint of exasperation. He was way past the age to keep up with you; that much was clear.

John hadn't even entertained the idea that you might see him as more than a trusted friend (he refused to believe that your relationship was purely professional), and now you were begging him to impregnate you? A whiplash wouldn't hold a candle to what this whole affair had become.

He would have wanted to plant his hands on your shoulders and shake some sense into you, to bombard you with questions about how you came up with such a plan, to remind you, in a perhaps overly patronising way, that this was not a decision you could take lightly: it was one that would change your future in the long run, one that you appeared to be handling far too casually.

His tired and burdened body rose from the chair in all its might, strong legs leading him directly in front of you. You owed a lot of explanations to your Captain, who had no intention of letting the matter go without first securing the info he was seeking.

"Why are you proposin' this to me?"

There was no malice or accusation in that, only a curiosity that bordered nearly on morbid. John felt shameful in that moment. Of all the vastly more important issues he could have raised, that was the only one his mind had focused on.

In a twisted manner, you had chosen him.

The knowledge that you'd handpicked him of all people to 'help' you was enough to rub his ego in all the right places, but he needed to know why.

Did you realise who you were offering this to? The consequences that would have followed?

His gaze never left your face, refusing to miss any possible change in your mannerisms. He made you feel like a rare species under a microscope, as if you couldn't hide anything from him, not when he had already scoured the innermost depths of your being in search of answers.

"You're the first one I thought of," you mentioned, finding it almost difficult to get the words out. Your limbs had suddenly become tense, making your posture stiffer than it should be. "Besides, I couldn't trust anyone but you with this."

John regarded himself as a stable person, capable of maintaining a cool and detached mind even in the most absurd and stressful scenarios. Yet in that moment, you had really managed to catch him off guard.

For fuck's sake, he had enough.

Did you want his cock to bully your pussy so badly, to fill it with cum again and again until there was no doubt left about the life he had planted in your womb?

He wasn't going to stop you.

Noticing his impassive expression, you hastened to assure him that, should he accept, you would ask nothing in return: no support for the baby, no parental responsibility, and no emotional attachment.

At that he merely snorted, shaking his head as if trying to chase away an annoying bug.

If you thought he would leave both of you, you and YOUR child, you obviously had still not fully understood the kind of man he was.

John could already imagine it.

A small cottage surrounded by nature, his beautiful wife waiting for him at the door, open arms and sweet smile, the laughter of children in the distance, and a warmth to finally caress his tough skin.

He wouldn't have let you resume your military career after; it would have been too dangerous and pointless.

Not that you had to know.

You would have so much to think about that you wouldn't even notice it. Your little angels would need the steady presence of a mother, and you certainly wouldn't be the one to deprive them of that, would you?

Don't worry; he would take care of it, putting his life on the line for the safety of your little family.

Family.

He had struggled to believe he could ever have one of his own, and now you were offering it to him on a silver platter. How lucky.

"Alright." His calloused hand rose to meet your cheek, thick thumb being passed over the soft pad of your lower lip. His face lowered enough to be exactly before yours. "I'll help you, just... don't come cryin' later for bitin' off more than you could chew."

Tag list: @nova-willow-541

✎There will definitely be a part two in the future.

[haikyu-mp4]

Something in common

word count; 415 – f!reader

I’ll be at your game tonight! Just me, though. Your dad is out with some of his buddies.

“Shit,” Hoshiumi cursed, sitting in the locker room and getting ready for the next game when he got a text from his mother. He sat down on the bench and crouched over his phone, giving the message a quick thumbs up that would definitely make her annoyed.

“Is there something wrong?” Ushijima asked, him and Kageyama looking at the shorter man curiously.

“I just found out my mom is coming to the game, but my girlfriend is also here and they haven’t met yet,” he grumbled, switching apps to message you.

No time to explain but you’ll probably meet my mom after the game.

You were watching a Schweiden Adlers game for the nth time, decked out in Hoshiumi merch. He’s your boyfriend, after all, it’s only right that everyone knows who you’re there for. When you saw the message from your boyfriend, you took in a sharp breath, but quickly had to focus back on the court as the players came walking out and the cheers roared. You’re meeting his mom for the first time like this? Hoshiumi loved his mom, she needed to approve of you.

Hoshiumi tried not to think of how he had to introduce you to his mom completely unprepared and instead focused on the game at hand. And he did so quite successfully, only taking about two points to get really into it like usual.

So as Hoshiumi scored a point with a particularly impressive spike and flexed his arms to the audience with a cheer, both you and his mother got out of your seats to scream his name. Then you both consequently looked at each other before bursting into soft laughs. There were only about three seats between you, who would have thought?

“Y/n?” she asked with a knowing smile. “I wasn’t sure you would be here.” All she got from her son was a thumbs up, after all.

“That’s me, it’s so nice to meet you,” you said back, cheeks flushing lightly at the unexpected meeting. You ended up asking some people to shuffle over so you could sit together, cheering for the same man who had never smiled brighter than when he saw you two side by side. He couldn’t help but chuckle a little, shaking his head as he realised you were quite similar. What was there not to approve of?

You both love him.

masterlist

[garciaasfluffypen]

it sounds like music to me

pairing: jemily x fem!reader word count: 3.4k warnings: reader is a bit bratty, SMUT. minors dni. top!emily, bottom!jj, switch!reader, fingering, pussy licking, based off of this ask and a little bit of this ask a/n: i hope its okay i mushed these two asks together!! also, as much as we love older jj and older em, i couldn't not do baby faced jj and em. i mean, look at them

emily and jj knew it would be hard to find a third person for their relationship, but didn’t expect it to be this hard.

they had been searching for just about a year but had been coming up short. the first girl was only in town for the summer, the second got jealous too easily. the third didn’t understand that jj and emily were a package deal, and the fourth only wanted emily. they had tried app after app but couldn’t get anyone who understood it was both of them or none of them. that seemed to be the hardest part, not knowing what they were going to get. if they were going to get someone who understood, or someone who they would have to coach through every step of the way. sure, they found the occasional gem, but there was always someone who was nice. was just what they were looking for.

they weren’t sure what they had expected when emily took a gig at the local dive bar, but they found themselves meeting up with some of their queer friends for dinner, drinks and according to the flier, “a fun night of entertainment!”. jj had never been one for singing, she had always preferred to do the behind the scenes stuff for emily. emily was the voice, the talent of the two of them. she was the one who was plastered all over social media, the one getting all the views. it could have been the reason some of the people found them attractive, now that she was thinking about it. It could very well have been the reason the girls were attracted to them. but she didn’t really mind, as long as she had a good time.

but they hadn’t met you yet.

you were the local musician for hire, typically playing guitar wherever you could. it wasn’t the best little side gig ever, but it got you the money to put food on the table. you had been doing the gigs you could pick up along with serving and bartending when you could. most of the money went to the bills you had to pay on your shitty studio apartment just outside of dc, but whatever you made from your gigs was what got you from paycheck to paycheck. you typically made enough to get through the week, but this week you were struggling. your car broke down and the bar was closed for renovations, meaning you were relying on yours serving tips to get you through this week. thankfully, there were some extra open mics going on this week that were desperately looking for a guitarist. and you just happened to be free.

which was probably how you found yourself at the dive bar at nine pm, sitting on a stage and playing along with people as they either sang their little hearts out or were very clearly drunk and looking for attention. the main act wasn’t going on until ten, and you knew that they most likely got more than you did, but you didn’t care. you simply were here to join in on the fun and maybe get laid. it was win win for you, unless you went home empty handed. then it was a win lose. but you were having fun, you got free drinks since you were providing the entertainment and it was interesting to see the different people and how they acted when they had alcohol in their system. every little bit you were whisked into different songs that didn’t have a backing track, and when you weren’t needed you could go sit at the bar and enjoy it. they had given you a flat fee for the night anyway, so it wasn’t like you needed to stay up on the stage.

you had noticed a group of women staring at you all night, and you one hundred percent were playing into it, but didn’t know much beyond that. every time they pointed at you or looked in your direction, you would wave or wink or do something that would make the blonde one giggle. she had been on her phone for most of the night so you weren’t sure what her game was, but you were only on the clock for another half hour before you could sit back, relax and enjoy whatever was going on after the little community singing night. you debated going to sit with the blonde and her friends, but figured something was going on with them since they kept looking towards the door. it probably wasn’t meant to be, anyway. you rarely found girls that were into the stuff you were into.

but that’s when you noticed them.

emily prentiss, or as you had begun to call her, one of the hottest people you had ever seen on social media, ever. you had heard rumors that she and her girlfriend were looking for a third, but knew the chances were slim to none that you’d ever run into them. however, it looked like luck was on your side as you watched them walk through the bar and head over to the group of girls who were eyeing you all night. you downed your beer, heading over to the dj and asking if you could play a quick song before they switched the stage over. if you had any chance to get with her, tonight was that night. you had enough alcohol in your system to give you the kick you needed to play the song you wrote inspired by her, so why not give it a chance?

emily’s eyes caught yours as you sang on the stage, the notes effortlessly flowing from the guitar in your hands. she almost forgot what she was supposed to be doing as she looked over to you, then back at jj, who had somehow started talking to the bar manager within the past five minutes. all the thoughts in her head disappeared as she listened to you sing, mesmerized by the tone of your voice and how the words came out of your mouth in ways she could never comprehend. she couldn’t help but notice the lyrics resembled a girl who sounded suspiciously like her, but shrugged it off, considering there were a lot of brown haired brown eyed girls out there.

“em?”

“sorry, what was that?”

“i was asking if you were set, since we soundchecked earlier today.”

“yeah, we should be good.”

“are you okay?” jj looked up at her. “you don’t have to-”

“no, i just saw a pretty girl, the one on stage.”

“hm?” jj turned around, looking up at the stage. “oh wow, she is pretty.”

“do you think…?”

“if you want to try, we can try. but by the looks of it, i think pen has been scheming all night.”

emily chuckled as she saw the blonde heading over to the bar, seemingly ordering a cup of whatever you had been drinking. considering penelope had told the two that she had seen someone they might be interested in, it was easy to put two and two together. she really hoped that the girl up on stage was the girl pen had her eyes on all night.

before she knew it, the stage had been switched for her set and she was whisked into the world of music, momentarily forgetting her whole plan of getting you to come home with her and jj. however, penelope did not forget and beckoned you over the second she saw you were free. you got pulled into a conversation with her and the three other women at the table, all of whom seemed to be friends with jj and emily. you noticed that jj was very timid and quiet, very unlike emily. but you had come to find out it was pretty easy to fall for the people who were total opposites of you, so you presumed that was the dynamic they had going on. you got along with them very well during the night, and got even more free drinks out of it. plus, you got to see emily perform as well. jj slipped away a few times to take videos for social media, smiling proudly as her girlfriend sang her songs.

after emily’s set was over, she made her way over to her friends, guitar bag hanging over her back. she set it down and slipped right into the conversation, taking a second to register you sitting at the table. you were pretty tipsy by now, borderline drunk, and you knew if you didn’t go home with emily and jj you’d be going home with someone else on one of your dating apps. the night could go one of two ways, and you really hoped it would go the way you wanted it to go. the older woman, who you learned was a therapist named tara, tapped out around midnight since she had clients in the morning. penelope and the shorter girl, kate, followed shortly after, mumbling something about needing to get enough rest before heading into work. which meant you were left with emily and jj. alone.

“you play guitar, yeah?”

“i do.” you nodded, taking another peanut from the cup on the table. “been playing since i was ten. my dad taught me.”

“any other instruments?"

“nah,” you started, smirking. “i probably could learn more though, i’ve been told i’m good with my fingers.”

you knew flirting with people was risky, but you figured it was worth a shot considering how emily had looked at you when you were singing earlier. a jolt went through your body as emily’s eyes darkened, and jj’s face became covered in a layer of blush. your intentions were clearly known now, and both girls in front of you looked at each other in silent agreement before jj got up to go close their tab. within minutes, you were shoving a ten dollar bill into the tip jar for the bartenders to split and following jj to the car where emily was waiting for you. the ride back to their place wasn’t horribly long, but the tension was palpable. emily had her hands on you before you could even get into the front door, pulling at the fabric of your shirt to get you inside.

“is this okay?”

“yes. very okay.” you nodded breathlessly. “i’m yours.”

you were lightly pushed onto the couch, both emily and jj coming to sit by you. jj started running her hands through your hair as emily bought you in for a kiss, her lips setting your body on fire as she kissed you. jj’s hand wandered down to your torso, finding its way under your shirt as she started placing kisses on your neck. you sighed contently as your hands moved to emily’s front, blindly reaching at the buttons on her blouse in an effort to get them off. emily wordlessly shrugged the blouse off, breaking the kiss momentarily so jj could get your shirt off. jj turned your face so you were facing her, softly kissing you. her kiss was different than emily’s was, and it sent a different wave of energy through you. it was much softer and had a little bit of restraint behind it, but not enough where it would deter anyone. you cupped her cheek as an effort to get her to kiss you harder, your other hand grabbing one of emily’s hands and placing it on your breast.

emily maneuvered herself so she was on the floor between you and jj, expertly sliding your bra off and placing one of your hardened nipples in her mouth. a moan escaped you as your head fell back at the pleasure coursing through your veins, both emily and jj consuming you wholly. carefully, emily laid you down on the couch and spread your legs apart, letting jj hover over you and take your other breast in her mouth. emliy started placing open mouthed kisses on your inner thighs, getting dangerously close to your center, but never close enough to give you that relief. your hips buckled up as jj placed herself on your lap, placing kisses on your chest as emily continued to torture you slowly. your hands clutched at jj’s hips as you pulled her close, hands eventually making their way up her back and getting her as close as you possibly could. eventually, jj lightly tapped at your shoulder as she expertly maneuvered herself behind you, pulling you to her chest as she slotted you in between her legs.

the dynamic stood out to you like a sore thumb, and it was hot as hell. you could almost see the visible switch in jj’s eyes as she crawled behind you, ready to do whatever it was emily told her. you didn’t feel yourself switching that easily, the need to be bossed around with pushback was too strong tonight. it could have been the alcohol, it could have been the fact that the last guy you had sex with was vanilla as they came. you needed to be a brat, and you needed it now.

“open your legs all the way, baby.” emily looked up at you through hooded eyes.

“make me.”

her eyebrows shot up. “make you?”

“make me.”

emily let out a chuckle as she went to pull your legs the rest of the way apart, a smirk playing on her face as you resisted. you felt jj dig her face into your shoulder, a hint of a smile on her lips as she watched the way emily reacted to you. they hadn’t had anyone who challenged her like this, it was a nice change. and to be quite honest, it was hot. jj had never had the balls to challenge her girlfriend, submitting to her relatively quickly. but there was something about having someone who could challenge her that made her think that you would be a permanent addition. jj’s hand wandered over your torso as she started placing kisses on your shoulders, pushing your hair out of her way with her free hand. she wrapped it around her palm, lightly pulling your hair to move your head back, making room for her to place kisses on your neck. emily’s fingers danced dangerously close to your center, and suddenly they weren’t. you whined, kicking your feet a little bit as you stared at her.

“you need to earn it, y/n, can you do that?”

you smirked. “you two gonna make it worth my while?”

“oh i’ll do more than that.”

emily pulled you up, flipping you over so you were facing jj. wordlessly, she guided your head to jj’s chest. you knew exactly what she wanted you to do, and you decided to play along. you were needy and horny and desperately needed to cum. you took one of jj’s breasts in your mouth, smirking to yourself as a moan fell from her lips. the hand that wasn’t holding yourself up started exploring the skin that had been exposed, playing around the baby blue band of her underwear. emily’s hand went to rub at your ass, massaging it as your knees slowly spread across the couch cushions to make room for emily to reach where you wanted her the most.

“make jj cum and i’ll think about letting you cum after her.”

“roger roger, captain.”

you made your way down jj’s torso, leaving a trail of open mouthed kisses as you looked up at her for consent. as she nodded, you slowly pulled the cotton off her hips, throwing them somewhere on the floor with the rest of the clothes that had been discarded haphazardly. as soon as your mouth hit her center, her hips buckled up to reach your mouth. as you ate jj out, you saw emily walk around to where jj had shifted to lay on the couch, propping herself over jj’s face. while your view was mostly blocked of jj, you had the perfect view of emily as she rode her girlfriend’s face. jj, who was caught in complete ecstasy, clutched at emily’s thighs as your tongue got faster and faster. between jj’s reactions and emily moaning, you could practically feel the wetness dripping down your legs. as you inserted a finger into jj’s center, you saw emily shake with pleasure as she came for the first time that night. she pulled herself off of jj’s face, brushing some hair out of the way as she bent down to kiss the blonde. seconds later, jj clenched around you as a loud moan escaped her, her arm flying to cover her eyes as her back arched. she flopped back down as she came down from her high, you slowly slipping your fingers out as to not startle her.

emily quietly walked behind you and put herself between your legs, her fingers finally touching you where you needed it the most. a groan fell from your lips as you fell forward onto jj’s shoulder, letting her run her hand through your hair as emily finger fucked you. the noises that were falling from your mouth were unholy, as were the sounds filling the room. jj went back to massaging your breasts and placing kisses over your skin, her free hand ghosting over your arm.

“only good girls get to cum, have you been good?”

“fu- emily please!”

her fingers slowed down. “have you been good?”

“y-yes! please i- i’m so close.”

“have you… been good?”

“i-i’ve been good please!” you begged, breaths becoming ragged. “emily please!”

emily quickened her pace again, watching with a smirk on her face as the orgasm you so strongly needed snuck up on you. your body exploded as you let yourself go, the release you had been longing for all night flowing through your veins while jj and emily helped you through it. jj pulled you into her arms as emily pulled out of you, padding away somewhere you weren’t sure where she was going. jj placed a kiss on the top of your head as emily came back, cup of water in one hand and a wet washcloth in the other. robes were draped over her arm, setting them down on the coffee table as she began the aftercare you needed. you chugged half of the water while emily cleaned you up, being careful not to hit your sensitive areas that would cause you to flinch. she cleaned up jj next, placing a small kiss on top of her hair and rubbing her cheek lovingly. you shimmied off jj’s lap to make room for emily, shoving yourself into the farthest corner of the couch you could muster without curling into a ball. emily pulled you back over to where they were, a gentle kiss placed on your cheek.

“you did such a good job, angel, you really did.” emily smiled at you. “what else can we do for you?”

“what do you mean?”

“we don’t expect you to leave, y/n. aftercare is important.” jj piped up from the couch. “stay the night, let us take care of you.”

“i wouldn’t want to intrude…”

“nonsense.” emily gave you a stern look. “stay. it’s way too late for you to be driving anyway.”

“oh i uh… i didn’t drive to the bar. i figured i’d be drinking so i just ubered.”

jj smirked. “she’s pretty and smart?”

“mm, debatable on smart.” you chuckled. “but i appreciate the compliment.”

“will you stay? at least until the morning. i don’t want you ubering this late.” emily looked at you with those big chocolate brown eyes.

“okay fi-ine” you jokingly sighed. “i’ll stay. as long as i get to sleep somewhere comfortable i’ll be fine.”

“then we’ll show you the way to the bedroom.”

you opened your mouth to decline the offer to sleep in bed with them, but emily held up a hand and gave you a stern look. you held

your hands up in surrender, knowing you wouldn’t be able to fight her on it. she helped both you and jj up, letting you put on one of the robes before leading you both to the bedroom.

“do what you need to do in the bathroom, love, we’ll be here when you’re done.”

you turned to emily. “thank you, a lot. and you’re sure i’m not intruding?”

“i promise.” she smiled at you. “now go do your stuff and come cuddle.”

“yes ma’am.”

[boyswillbebuggsorsomething]

If I Saw Him, I’d Still Kiss Him - pt.1

Spencer Reid x M!Reader 

Summary: After a case, the BAU has a night out at O’Keefe’s, which unexpectedly reunites Spencer with someone he hadn’t expected to see ever again

Warnings: Vaguely inspired by If I Saw Him, I’d Still Kiss Him by McCafferty but specifically the last verse (or at least that’s how it started, it really doesn’t seem like it in this one but it will come into play in the next few), cursing, drinking/alcohol consumption, kinda insecure Spencer, Spencer is very overwhelmed for the first half or so, mentions of clawing off skin to describe feeling overwhelmed, no physical descriptions for R other than looking kinda dead inside, R & Spencer’s past is somewhat inspired by Trees & Trees II by McCafferty (but that isn’t really expanded upon in this, it will be later though), probably ooc, so many commas, I think it switches from third person to second person perspective but I’m pretty sure it works?, NOT PROOFREAD OR EDITED

A/N: This is my first time ever writing x reader and it kind of sucks so I’ll probably rewrite it someday but I had to create this storyline. I also haven’t written any fanfiction since I was in middle school so yeah this is kind of chaotic, a lot of this was written on notes app after chugging two monsters back to back and praying it turned out okay AND IT SHOWS. Also, I fully forgot about Ethan’s existence until I started writing this so there might be similarities but I did not intend them if they’re too close. And I know this was originally going to be a fic where they go to Vegas and the reader still lives there but I hated writing the case and it turned out really horribly so now it’s this. THANK YOU SO MUCH IF YOU ACTUALLY READ THIS THOUGH.

Word Count: 2169

Spencer hadn’t planned to go out the night after a week-long case. All he really wanted to do was go home and rewatch Dr. Who for what must have been the hundredth time, too exhausted to even read. However, the rest of his team had other plans and he was (somewhat) reluctantly dragged to O’Keefe’s to get drinks.

A few drinks in and he was already regretting coming with them. It was crowded and just a few degrees too warm and loud in the way that only a bar can be. The lights were low to the point that he had to strain his eyes just to have an adequate amount of spatial awareness. It was all just a bit too much, and for Spencer, a bit too much really meant he wanted to claw his skin off. He tried to sit through it a bit longer out of politeness, the stubborn nagging in the back of his mind that never quite went away telling him that only one wrong move and they won’t like him anymore. Logically he knew it was untrue, the BAU was his family, but going through high school and university in the formative years of his early teens still clearly had quite an effect on him. So he sat with the team at their table, fingers drumming on the side of his glass as he tried to pay attention to whatever escapades Garcia was recounting. 

Tap. Tap. Tap. Tap. 

Someone a few tables over was laughing. Loudly.

Tap. Tap. Tap. Tap. 

A man at the bar was yelling, too drunk to decipher his words. 

Tap. Tap. Tap. Tap. 

Someone at his table was looking at him. Asking something.

Tap. Tap. Tap. Tap. 

JJ laid her hand on his shoulder and it was just the last thing he could deal with. 

“Spence, you alright?”

He tensed immediately and he barely made out her question before he stood up jerkily, nodding slightly.

“Yeah, yeah, I think I just need some air. I’ll be back in a minute.”

“Alright, do you want someone to come with you?”

Spencer simply shook his head and walked away, leaving no room for questioning. Dodging too-warm, questionably drunk people, he elbowed his way to the door, muttering hushed apologies when he bumped into people and fiddling anxiously with his fingers. When he pushed open the door, the cool bite of the autumn night hit him in the face, calming him only slightly. The fist clenching his heart loosened the smallest bit as he leaned back against the brick wall and closed his eyes, taking in the deepest breath he could manage. Despite the city sounds, he began to relax. Drinking when he was this exhausted had clearly brought his tolerance for anything at all down quite a bit, and the regret of going out settled deep in his chest. He tried to ignore it though. He might hate himself in the morning, but it was on him and his inability to say no. The dark of the night enveloped him comfortingly as he closed his eyes, resting his head back against the wall. Spencer still fidgeted with his hands, but not with the anxious fervor the action held within the confines of the bar, now in a soothing motion, helping him regulate his thoughts and feelings.

His peace was interrupted when a young man who had clearly seen better days stumbled out of the bar, muttering to himself in annoyance. Spencer ignored him at first, expecting him to go elsewhere. He did not. Instead, the man took his place by Spencer, slumping against the wall in an almost pitiful way. There were shadows under his eyes, the kind that comes not from a lack of sleep, but an exhaustion that makes its home deep in your bones, and there was a grayish pallor that had taken to his skin, only exacerbating the fatigued look that seemed to possess the man. Spencer attempted not to stare, but something about this guy was familiar. The slope of his nose. The shape of his lips. The colour of his eyes Spencer could swear he had seen in much closer quarters before. 

He fished out a packet of cigarettes, Newports, from his jeans, as well as a lighter. The man glanced at Spencer as he placed the cigarette between his lips, to which Spencer simply shook his head. The two men stood silently against the wall, only the flick of the lighter, the soft exhales of smoke, and the sounds of the city to accompany them. The longer Spencer looked at him though, the more he felt like he knew this man. Somewhere behind his ribs he felt that ache of the past, the one you get when you look at old photographs and realise you will never be that child again. He knew this guy, he was sure of it. 

He spoke up after some time, voice shaky with hesitation, “Sorry if this is a strange question, but have we met before? You seem extremely familiar.”

“Dunno, might’ve. I haven’t been living here very long,” He responded hoarsely around the cigarette, introducing himself with a slight nod and half smile, raising an eyebrow to ask Spencer to do the same.

“Uh, Dr. Spencer Reid.” Spencer smiled a hesitant, tight lipped smile, his heart beginning to race with an unfamiliar excitement as he realised he most definitely knew that name, which seemingly earned a small laugh from the man, a look of amused confusion gracing his features.

“No fucking way.”

“Sorry?”

“Spencer Reid? Really?”

“Yeah? Is- Is there a problem?”

“No, no, just- Used to know a Spencer Reid. Ages ago though, back when I was in middle school,” the man chuckled, breathing out a cloud of smoke, “He was in fuckin’ highschool though, but same age as me. Full on genius, swear to god. Shit, that’s- Wow, what a coincidence.” The man shook his head, a bemused grin across his lips as he took another drag.

Spencer paused, his face twisting together in a strange mix of joy, shock, and confusion. This man, this strange man who suddenly appeared at the same bar Spencer went to at least once a month with the team, was exactly who he thought he was. He knew him. He knew you. 

“You lived in Las Vegas, didn’t you?” Spencer tried to hide the elation he felt at this sudden reunion.

“How’d you know?”

Spencer simply smiled. He might not have been the greatest at social cues, but he knew you would know exactly what he meant. And you did. 

Looking at him now, you realised this stranger was most definitely the same Spencer you’d grown up with. He’d grown into his features, his eyes no longer buggy behind his glasses, his smile no longer crooked. His hair was styled neatly, no longer the whirlwind of misplaced strands he had as a child. He still fidgeted endlessly, just as he did when he was young, and he still possessed that kind nature that had emanated from him so freely years ago. Somewhat more hidden now, but there nonetheless. This willowy man was the same person as the boy you had rode your bike to school with. The same boy who helped you with your homework when you were too tired to study. Who held you when you broke down in sobs after you told him you liked boys. Who was your best friend until he wasn’t. Somehow, you couldn’t help but smile. You hadn’t seen him since you were, what? 14? A decade or so ago now. And all of a sudden he was in front of you. 

“Seriously?”

He nodded, still smiling.

“Holy shit. It’s been ages! What’ve you been doing, other than getting, like, a million PhD’s and all that?” You took the cigarette from your lips, letting it burn freely as you spoke.

“Well, it’s only 3 PhD’s, two bachelor’s,” Spencer corrected without thinking, earning a small huff of laughter from you, which left his face heating up slightly, “Um, I work with the FBI now.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah,” he continued, speaking with his hands, “I’m a profiler for the BAU, or the Behaviour Analysis Unit, which actually used to be called the Behavioural Science Unit when it was first created, and before that-” he cut himself off, pausing slightly as he became suddenly aware that he was starting to ramble, “Sorry.”

“Nah, I like hearing about ..stuff. That much hasn’t changed. So, what do you do as a ‘profiler’?” You said the word with exaggerated mysticism, waving your fingers slightly and grinning as his face lit back up.

“Okay, well, we analyse the behaviour of criminals in order to catch them. So, things like how they treat their crime scenes and disposal sites or even the crimes they commit can tell us a lot about what causes them to do what they do and with this we create a profile, hence the name profiler, where it will describe the suspect in aspects of appearance, past, relationships, all sorts of things, and we are able to find them and lock them up with it.”

“Oh, wow, cool. So, what are you doing here instead of doing… all that?”

“I’m here with my team, they’re inside, we just finished a case earlier today. Uh, what about you?”

“Haven’t been doing all that great recently so I wanted to drink until I wasn’t thinking about much of anything,” You sighed, punctuating your sentence with a small, bitter laugh before placing your cigarette back between your lips. For a moment, Spencer couldn’t tear his eyes away from your mouth. The menthol cigarette burning, the foul scent wafting around both men.

“You hated cigarettes when we were kids,” Spencer observed, crinkling his nose slightly, confusion in his tone. He knew people could change, of course he did, but you held such a disdain for cigarettes and their smoke as a child he hardly expected you to ever take up the habit.

“Yeah,” you huffed, exhaling a cloud of smoke before putting out the cigarette on the wall behind you, “Sorry.”

“You don’t need to apologise, it doesn’t really affect me, but it is horrible for your health. Which you undoubtedly know already. Drinking as a way to forget things also isn’t healthy. It actually has detrimental effects on the mind and body in the long run-”

“Yeah, I know, Spencer,” you sighed, pushing away from the wall, “Well, I only came out to blow off some steam and to smoke, so I’m heading back in. You gonna stay out here or go back in with your team?”

He paused for a moment, usually it took him a bit more time by himself to fully relax, but surprisingly enough, your presence had seemingly worked just as well. Just as it had all those years ago. 

“I’m gonna go back inside, I think,” Spencer confirmed, following you back into the bar.

You nodded, and the two of you made your way back inside. Before you split apart however, you stopped him. 

“We should get together sometime. Actually catch up.”

“Oh, okay. Yeah.”

“Uh, here,” you muttered, grabbing out a pen from the same pocket that held your cigarettes and lighter, promptly grabbing his wrist and scrawling out your number on his hand, “Call me sometime. Sorry if you still have, uh, that thing about touch.”

Spencer didn’t respond, he simply watched bewildered as you slipped away into the crowd. A moment spent silently standing in the crowd made him realise just how much he had missed you, the few moments you had shared already leaving him wanting more time. As far as he knew, you still lived in Nevada, but he hadn’t spoken to you since you had started highschool. The last time you spoke, you were doing.. worse than before he left for uni, but you had always refused to elaborate, all he re was a lot of rants about wanting to drop out. He always regretted not keeping in touch, but you hadn’t exactly made an effort either. It was strange though, how quickly you slipped back into such an easy familiarity in a short time span. He wondered briefly what brought you here, what made you leave Nevada for Virginia of all places. He was jolted out of his train of thought when he heard his name called, his attention dragged back to the table the rest of the team occupied where a clearly drunk Penelope was waving him over, giggling about something or other. When he sat back down, he noticed the amusement on the others’ faces.

“So,” Penelope began, wagging her eyebrows suggestively, “Who was that?”

“What?”

“The guy you were with, who was he?” She clarified.

“Oh, just an old friend. I knew him back when I lived in Vegas, believe it or not,” he explained, pursing his lips in a half smile.

“An old friend, huh?” 

“Please don’t make this weird,” he groaned in half-annoyance, half-amusement.

A/N: Thank you all who read this, it really isn’t very good but I really love the character I’ve created for R and am really excited to expand upon it. The next installation of this will follow Spencer and R as they slowly build up their friendship again, and start to actually notice their feelings, and all of that good stuff.

[joeys-babe]

Joey B Imagines: A Day In The Life

————————————————————————-

Summary: You do a mini TikTok vlog of a day in the life with your boys while pregnant. (Pregnancy announcement to the public!)

Warnings: Fluff

Pairing: Joe Burrow x reader

Imagine Universe: Into The Mystic

————————————————————————-

January 10, 2024

After posting some more pranks I've done on Joe, surprisingly, my following on TikTok has grown significantly.

Usually, posting Joe on my socials garnered negative attention, AKA hate. I did it because social media apps were meant to share your life, and Joe was a huge part of my life.

I never meant it in a braggadocios way, but that's what people seemed to take from my family photos and post-win pics with my husband.

That's why I was so surprised to see that everyone loved my Joe pranks.

The comments held a consensus that I’d never seen under a post of mine, they loved Joe and I’s dynamic.

I didn't need the public fan validation to make me feel secure in my relationship with Joe, but for once, they understood how special our relationship was, and some even apologized for past statements.

“They love us, Joe.” - you

“No, honey, they love you.” - Joe smiled

After those words were shared, Joe pointed out how all the comments were mostly praising me.

“take back everything I said abt her.”

“stop she matches joe’s energy so well…”

“the way he can’t stay mad at her, they’re so in love”

“actually such a cute couple”

“they compliment each other so well!”

“i see why joe married her! 🥹”

“i want y/n to be MY mom.”

“who gave y/n the right to be so adorable.”

“she’s so fun!”

“the way joe looks at her.. 😭”

“still jealous, but he loves her sm.”

“MY PARENTS.”

“i bet y/n’s the best mom and wife”

“Everyone’s switching sides now, but they never deserved hate. Joe wouldn't marry her if he didn't love her, and I'm glad that you guys can see that now. She makes him really happy!!”

“See? Some are even requesting more videos, baby. Do you see how many new followers you've gotten?” - Joe

“It's just because I posted content of you…” - you

“No, don't say that. It's because you showed your personality, and they love you. They see why I love you.” - Joe

“Do you really think so?” - you

“I know so. Everyone thinks your pranks are hilarious, you're funny, and you handle me super well.” - Joe

“I do handle you super well.” - you laughed

“The best.” - Joe winked

——

That was two days ago, right after we put the twins to sleep and right before we went to bed ourselves.

Currently being nine in the morning, I just woke up.

It was off-season now, but that still meant early mornings.

This morning was a little different, though, because I was making a ‘day in the life’ TikTok.

Since my pranks had become a hit, I've gotten quite a few video ideas from fans in the comments. Most wanted to see more of our everyday lives and wanted to know what it was like as an NFL wife and mother.

So, I decided to do a short video to show what our family day routine was like on an average off-season day.

The thing is… Joe didn't know it was happening.

Joe loved that I was finally being seen the way he saw me but was still weary of what I was posting.

He wasn't a huge fan of social media, and being super public with our relationship and kids, he detested it.

I respected it, but sometimes Joe would ask to participate in a video unprompted.

Lately, that has become a bigger case, so I was hoping he wouldn't mind taking part in the mini-vlog.

Joe was still asleep when I got out of bed, so I discreetly walked into the bathroom after grabbing my phone.

I wouldn't be talking in the video, just showcasing the sounds of the background and whatever I was doing, while the text that I would put over it later would describe what was going on.

After making little clips of me brushing my teeth, washing my face, and brushing my hair out, I walked back into the bedroom.

Next, I recorded a little snippet of me picking out my outfit - leggings and one of Joe’s hoodies - before turning my phone off to get changed.

Now that I was ready, I headed downstairs to start breakfast.

I pulled ingredients out of the fridge for Joe’s smoothie, omelets for me and me, and some of the ingredients for the boy's pancakes.

Just as I was starting the blender, a sleepy-looking Joe with raging bedhead shuffled into the kitchen.

“G’morning.” - you grinned

Thankfully, he put on sweatpants and a T-shirt, and I was glad of that because he'd complain about being shirtless on camera.

“Hi.” - Joe mumbled

“You good, buddy?” - you laughed

“Mhm. I just don't like waking up to see that you're not next to me.” - Joe

“Awe, I'm sorry. C’mere.” - you

I opened my arms to Joe, and he immediately was in my embrace. My arms were around his waist as I squeezed him, and his head lay on my shoulder.

When he pulled away from me, Joe’s eyes landed on the recording camera and immediately went wide-eyed.

“Why are you recording?” - Joe

“I'm making a ‘day in the life' video. I won't put anything in it that you aren't comfortable with, like what just happened.” - you

“Oh… ok. Yeah, don't put that in, though, because I sound like a baby.” - Joe

His grimace made me laugh because I thought our interaction was cute. Then again, I loved Joe’s needy, soft side. It was purely adorable.

“My baby.” - you grinned

“Stop…” - Joe

Joe was trying to hide his smile as his cheeks turned pink, and I couldn't help but giggle. I loved knowing I could make him blush, even after all the years we've been together.

“Do you need help recording anything?” - Joe

“Not at the moment, but if I do, I'll ask you.” - you

“Okay. Want me to make the pancakes?” - Joe

“Sure! Can I get a clip of you flipping them?” - you

“Of course.” - Joe smiled

Shortly after that, Joe got started on the pancakes, and I recorded a little video to get audio of the sizzling from the hot pan.

When I got a short clip of Joe flipping a mini pancake, I didn't put his face in it, but you could very clearly see it was him. His easily recognized bracelets and hands gave that away, along with the laugh the speaker picked up when he executed the flip perfectly.

“I should be a pro cook.” - Joe

“We both know that shouldn't happen.” - you

Joe busted out laughing and told me to put that in the mini-vlog.

“Will do.” - you giggled

——

Later in the day, I had gotten most of the wanted content filmed, including waking the boys up, breakfast, and playing/cleaning around the house.

Now, Joe, Me, and the boys were on our way to the reason for the entire video.

AKA the ultrasound that I'm having today.

It was a hard launch of my pregnancy, but Joe and I thought we'd include it in the video since my maternity photoshoot wasn't for a couple more weeks. The reason we were announcing it before the shoot was because it was getting hard to hide my growing bump. We’d much rather announce it ourselves than someone screenshot a picture of me in the background with a round belly.

When we got sent back to the ultrasound room, Joe sat in the chair next to where I was. Tyson was in Joe’s lap while Miles sat in the chair next to them.

“You ready to see sissy?” - Joe

Tyson and Miles both nodded, causing Joe and I to both smile.

Soon the ultrasound tech walked into the room and before I knew it, the familiar feeling of cold gel on my stomach made me hiss.

“Okay, Mama?” - Joe

“Gel’s just cold. I'm fine.” - you smiled

Joe made sure to get a good video of you watching the monitor, and he felt tears pricking in his eyes at the sight of his baby girl.

He would never get tired of being called, girl dad, Joe wore it like a proud Boy Scout who had just received a new badge.

“Baby Girl is doing great, measuring how she should be, and is very healthy.” - Tech

“Good.” - you and Joe in sync

After a few more minutes, she wiped off my bump, and I was set to go.

Joe helped me off of the chair and pulled the hoodie back over my stomach.

“I love you.” - Joe grinned

“I love you too.” - you

——

I spent the first thirty minutes back home editing together the clips I already had, getting approval from Joe for each one.

It surprised me how much feedback and “Oh, this would be cool!” Joe was giving me. He liked this more than I thought he would.

We ate dinner just shortly after that, and the rest of the afternoon was slow, as it usually was.

Tyson and Miles went to bed earlier than usual, so Joe and I spent the majority of the evening watching space documentaries that Joe had been wanting to watch.

The last video of the day routine vlog was of the TV in front of us, Joe’s hand on my bump in view, as well as our legs tangled together.

I never truly appreciated the little things in my everyday life till they were pointed out in a video, like how Tyson always looks at Joe for approval before doing something or how Miles's eyes crinkle up when he smiles, just like his daddy’s.

Watching back at the completed TikTok while tucked into my handsome husband’s side as he rubbed over my baby bump and drew little shapes on it with his thumb had me thinking something I seem to always find my mind drifting off to. Oh, boy, was I one lucky girl.

————————————————————————-

Authors note: cutie family fluff for Sunday

Request for this fic; thank you anon! 🫶

Hope you enjoyed! 💕

[ao3lestappeninchident]

hey could you write about Carlos Sainz. Y/N is a 24 year old Spanish journalist and she and Carlos flirt all the time in front of the camera and Lando and Charles make fun of Carlos because he is always looking forward to doing an interview with Y/N ​​because they flirt hard every time. two that on twitter they created a hashtag on the flirting moments between y/n and carlos

Behind The Camera

Carlos Sainz x Spanish Journalist fem!reader

A/N: I hope this is wat you meant. I never worked with these fake apps before, so don't pay too much attention to dates and times.

One of the flirting scenes is highly based on that one Sebastian Vettel interview.

The paddock was buzzing with people from all around the world. Grand stands were filled with the colors of different teams and drivers. There were big crowds of orange for the hometown heroes, Max verstappen and Lando Norris.

Cheers were heard as Carlos crossed the finish line in p2, just behind his teammate and in front of his old one. The red bull had crashed out of the race after the touch when Sergio Perez tried to overtake the Dutch man. Unfortunately both of the cars tuned into each other, moving Carlos up to third. After the pitstops he had managed to do an undercut on the Mclaren driver and finished on the second podium place.

"That is P2, mate. Good job," his race engineer congratulated him through the radio, prompting Carlos to let out an excited scream.

"Vamos!" he exclaimed, parking his car in front of the P2 sign and stepping out with a wide grin on his face. Charles stood on top of his own car, proudly displaying one finger in the air to signify his win. Carlos congratulated his fellow driver on the victory before turning to his team and embracing them in a warm hug, celebrating their shared success. It is a good day for the Ferrari fans and that didn't happen often.

.

"Congratulations Carlos on your p2. How are you feeling?" You ask with a bright smile on your face. You always loved interviewing Carlos. He is always really nice and you have nice conversations behind the cameras. Also a plus point that he drives for your favorite team.

"Great now that you are here," he answers, his eyes twinkling as he gives you a wink that sends a shiver down your spine. You have to try hard not to blush at the man's charming comment. "It's a great day for the team with a 1-2 finish. I hope we have more of these moments to come."

"You were absolutely flying out there today. Your performance was outstanding. I am sure that you have more of these moments. "

Carlos smiles at your words, his gaze lingering on you for a moment longer than necessary. "Thank you. The car felt great and the team did a great job with the undercut." He had been looking forward to seeing you today after he heard you will do the podium post race interviews. Lets just say he had some extra motivation for this race.

"With the undercut you managed to get in front of Lando. Was it difficult to keep him behind?"

"Of course. He is a great driver and their car is very fast. He really had me concentrate those last laps. " Carlos looks back at where Lando was standing next to the race winner. Lando gave him a little smile for the comment.

"The safety car came at a good moment and you got a free pit from it. Do you think you could have had the same pace with the old ones?"

"The safety car did come at a great time. I was struggling with the tyres and really wanted to switch them. The team said I couldn't because then I had to drive out the race for the remaining laps and that was too many. So having an extra free stop really helped. "

"Any plans for after the race. How are you going to celebrate it?"

"I am sure there is a party planned already. Good thing is that it is summer holiday and we don't need to do training wasted." He jokes and you let out a laugh.

"Sounds great. Have any plans for the summer break? How are you going to spend your free time? "

"Well, What are your plans?" He smirks and you have to take a second to let your mind take in his comment. You want to play to game with him, but chose to be professional and do as if you don't get the hint.

"Nice of you to ask. I'm heading back to Spain to visit some family," you reply, trying to maintain your cool exterior even as your heart races at the thought of his attention turning towards you.

"I hope I see you around then, Hermosa" Carlos says, his smirk widening as he rakes a hand through his hair in a gesture that sends a jolt of desire through you. You say your goodbyes before Lando takes his place in front of your camera.

Out of your sight Charles laughs at his teammate and gives him a pat on the back, a playful smirk placed on his face.

"What?" Carlos looks at him with confused puppy eyes. He takes his water bottle and takes a sip.

"What are your plans." Charles imitates his teammates question before letting out a louder laugh that turns the head of other people. "Mate, just ask her out already. It is painful to watch you keep flirting with each other."

"I ask her what her plans are. That is just being polite."

"Alright. And when you found out she was doing the post race interviews, you didn't smile from ear to ear because you would be seeing her again?"

"She is a great journalist and my friend. "

When Lando came back from his interview with you he had made the same remark as Charles and Carlos just groaned in reply. He was not going to hear the end of it.

The fans on twitter were going wild after the interview. It wasn't the first time you and Carlos had shared some flirty comments and there were fan pages dedicated to the two of you. There was even a tag going around with all the fans favorite moments of you two together that you weren't aware of.

Lando laughs as he opens twitter. He was at the celebration party after the race and he had sit down next to the two ferarri drivers after a round of shots.

" Whats so funny?" Carlos asks with a confused expresion as he tries to look at the Brits phone. Lando shows the Twitter reactions.

" Looks like you are the only blind one."

[somuchwatersoclosetohome]

good morning job seekers here are my thoughts on last night's stage/fright!! others have covered the main plot points and points of interest so this is literally ~1000 words of self-indulgent inane drivel that i wrote in my notes app at 1am (so sorry if there's misremembered lines / typos etc.), you're welcome

(will edit as i remember more stuff)

spoilers for stage/fright 22/03 evening show

le general observations

ok first up let me just say the VIBES for this show were IMPECCABLE. as many of you know this is my third watch and i feel like the energy this time was j u i c y

this time and the last time i went were both saturday evenings which i think can be good? like this audience were super engaged but not overly rowdy... it felt the right level of keen-ness that the company were responding to

all of this to say that it definitely looked to me as if the company but especially R&S were 👏 feeling 👏 themselves 👏

also means that when y'all go and see s/f be keeeeen!! they really respond to (the appropriate amount of) whooping and hollering at the right moments. i mean they literally say in the programme "you can't hear smiles" lol and we all know about reece's experiences with the 'corpses' in the producers lmao

speculation.com, i wonder if the company are feeling this but i'm definitely acutely aware that there's <2 weeks left of the run now 🥺 (where did all the time go???), which i'm trying hard not to think about because (1) sad and (2) what will i base my personality on from 6 april 2025

i’m going to cry SO HARD on the final shows

act 1

R&S got a muuuuch longer applause than i've seen previously when they come out in front of the curtain post-hamlet / a house divided scene to introduce the show. like the applause and wooping went on what felt like a solid minute. they looked happy it was cute!!

paul whitehouse was the hostage and lmaoooo did the guy milk it. the bit where they ask him what he's been in he just kept going listing stuff for aaaages

BUT it looked like R&S were having a great time here. i mean tbh reece spent most of this section with his back to the audience or adjusting his moustache bc he was lol'ing so much

an EXCELLENT fast show reference when paul has to do the spanish accent on the phone and len/eddie comes out with "SCORCHIO" iykyk

covered elsewhere but eddie knows paul from gone fisting / gone girl (and one other that i have neglected to remember)

paul whitehouse cannot play the trumpet. like at all. no sound was produced (len/eddie even says "try turning it on" and mimes switching it on haha)

len/eddie/steve's voice goes so high when he says "it's jUst a sTiCK of ceLerY" and tommy/ray/reece visibly loses it cracking up

🚨 jeremy dyson callout 🚨 as paul is leaving he said something about working with the clever/smart one jeremy dyson haha

also from the BCDR wider bit, tommy's voice crack on "you almost died len" was hearTBREAKING reece nailed it 10/10

act 2

let me open this section with HUGO my one true love this character has grown on me so much and he is honestly such a highlight. he needs his own spin-off tbh

reece was also playing hugo turned up to 11 imo

hugo/reece got a full on applause for his elements song dance number i was so happy!! last couple of times i've seen it's just got some laughs but this time people clapped for ages again to the point they had to wait for people to stop clapping before they could continue. YES BBY YOU'RE AMAZING

hugo did the leg amputation bit SO exaggeratedly this time, from the "this one sir?" to dragging the bone saw along the tray when he takes it from madam cragg

in general the p h y s i c a l i t y of reece in this production is just something else. he does it as eddie and hugo and the fucking bunny hops and exaggerated movement are just so good and make such a difference so thank you rs for the commitment to the bit

between the last time i saw s/f and this time i learned about the concept of sleeve garters (i think thanks to @vagueeyes) and now i noticed them on goudron muahah

i'd picked up from others' watches to watch marcus during the trepanning scene and yes! very worth it!! he mouthes along with the lines very nice detail

every time i've seen the musical number R&S have both looked sooo happy and again tonight. honestly petition for both of them but especially r to be in a fully fledged musical bc he smiles so much in this segment man is in his element

standing ovation 💖💖💖

stage door

right ok so first my GOD i have not seen the line this long so far?? like it literally went from the stage door around the corner onto charing cross rd and almost back to the main entrance of the theatre?? and they still came out and signed everything for everyone that was waiting 😭 true kings i'm still in awe at how they just... don't have to do this at all and yet they still do and they're so patient with everyone

i mean i said nothing of note to them bc i was on cloud 9 (hur hur) but just !!! thank you for coming out

i noticed this last time i went but absolute lols how steve is always the always the one carrying all the gift bags etc. from fans and reece is entirely unencumbered (apart from infamous CAT bag) like yas king go off

i overheard someone asking steve if there was going to be a DVD of the show and he said no 😔 but i wonder, who knows if you can trust these jokers... theres_been_a_twist.mp4

and THEN i had A Thought: imagine the concept - a filmed version of stage/fright with a commentary a la TLoG shows..... please simon evans do it for the fans

omg this is so long and i've said like nothing of note hahahaha ok well thanks for sticking with it

(oh also i'm actually writing this from the afterlife because i touched reece's hand)

[m1ckeyb3rry]

hii!! First of all ur theme is so aesthetically pleasing and I love all the nagi. I like binge read all of your event works and *chefs kiss*. Could I request a piece for karasu with the theme of like academic rivals/classmates? No worries if not, hoping ur doing well and taking care of urself!

On an unrelated note I saw that post about rude comments and im so sorry that’s happening to you! I honestly don’t know what drives ppl to bother leaving nasty comments esp when it’s not like they’re being forced to read anything T-T Hoping to send you a bit of love to counter those trolls!

Synopsis: Crows are clingy birds, and Tabito Karasu’s feelings are hurt easier than you realize. (part two here!) (part three here!)

Event Masterlist

Pairing: Karasu x Reader

Chapter Word Count: 9.1k

Content Warnings: academic rivals to lovers, karasu is an asshole, reader is also an asshole, jealous karasu 😍, hiori randomly pulls up at one point for some reason??, yukimiya requests to follow one (1) person and accidentally causes the most dramatic pseudo breakup ever

A/N: anon i used to pray for times like these 😭😩 LMAOAO karasu is my fav (behind nagi ofc) but i’ve never gotten around to writing him so getting this request made me SO excited HAHA. i haven’t done anything rivals/enemies to lovers before so fingers crossed this doesn’t feel too awkward or unrealistic or rushed anything!! and yayyy i love my little nagi theme (and also nagi in general) i’m glad you like it too!! and my writing too, you’re so sweet 🥹 there will always be jerks unfortunately but lovely people like you make it all worth it 💖 thank you again and i hope this is kind of what you were looking for 🫶🏻

Additional: part of my 500 follower event! see the event description and rules to make a request of your own.

ONE: POISON IT

You could hardly contain your smile as you sauntered up to Tabito Karasu’s desk, your exam held behind your back. He was sitting by himself — his seat partner was sick this week, from what you had heard, so he had taken the chance to spread out his things and stretch his legs. When he noticed you, he raised his eyebrows, mouth tugging into a frown at your amusement.

“What?” he said. You brandished the paper in front of you, irises sparkling as you leaned over to rest your forearms on the desk.

“I got full marks on the last Chemistry exam,” you said. Karasu made a face at you, snatching the test from your hands and scrunching his face up as he inspected it.

“Seriously?” he said.

“Seriously,” you said. “What did you get?”

He crossed his arms and looked away. “Not telling.”

“You definitely failed!” you said in delight, taking back the exam and laughing at him. “How embarrassing. You failed the easiest test of the year, and yet you consider Chemistry to be one of your best subjects? I can’t wait to see how badly you do during finals week.”

“I did not fail,” he said, rolling his eyes. “Not that it’s any of your business, but I got a ninety-eight.”

“Ninety-eight! That’s even worse than outright failure,” you said. “You were so close to perfection, and yet in the end, you fell short. It must sting for things to work out like that.”

“Yes, I’m positively wounded,” he said dryly before batting his eyelashes at you. From anyone else, the rapid switch in demeanor would’ve left you reeling, but the shifting mood was to be expected from him. “Will you give me a kiss and make it better?”

You rolled up your test and smacked him on the head with it. “No.”

“Anyways, my overall grade in the class is still higher than yours, because rankings were updated today and I’m still number one, so I’m not sure what cause you have to be boasting,” he said.

“Hm, but did you notice who’s number one in Modern Literature?” you said, pulling out your phone and opening the school’s app, which listed each class’s rankings in every subject. “Yup, that’s right, me.”

“Good job, Y/N!” he said, clapping mockingly. “Shall we have a party? It’s a big occasion — the mediocre number two has finally done something of such note that she’s number one for the first time in her life.”

“I’ve been number one plenty of other times!” you snapped. “For your information, I’ve been first in the class in mathematics and history every year since middle school, so who are you to be acting like this is a first? If anyone’s mediocre, it’s you!”

He raised his hands in the air innocently, his trademark smirk gracing his features once more now that he had succeeded in irritating you, as was his typical goal.

“Alright, alright, no need to be upset,” he said. “It’s not good for you. Clouds your judgment.”

“In what way?” you said.

“I mean, somehow, you got the two of us confused,” he said. “And we’re nothing alike.”

“I did no such thing,” you said.

“Well, I seem to recall you calling me mediocre, but between the two of us, the subpar one is obviously you,” he said, flicking your forehead. You slapped his hand away.

“You — the bell is going to ring, so I’m going to go back to my seat, but just so you know, you’re way more mediocre than me, Mr. Two-Percent-Short!” you said.

“Stellar comeback!” he called out. “My ego is bruised beyond healing!”

“Good!” you called back, ignoring the sarcasm. “Maybe it’ll return to a more normal size. Your head has grown too big, it’s almost as ridiculous as that hair of yours!”

“Leave the hair alone!”

During your free period, you decided to go to the library for some peace and quiet to work on your homework and find some of the sources you needed for your next research project. For belonging to a high school, the library was surprisingly extensive, and you had managed to find relevant information for every other project you had ever done in it, so you had high hopes. Unfortunately, it seemed this latest assignment was more obscure than anything you had completed before, so on your second lap of the shelves where the books, if they existed, would be located, you resigned yourself to giving up.

Just then, a volume caught your eye. The cover was shiny and pristine, the spine still unbent with newness. Crouching, you pulled it out, and when you saw the title emblazoned across the cover in bright yellow lettering, you began to laugh, making a beeline to the checkout counter with it tucked under your arm.

“Hey, Y/N! How was your morning?” your best friend said as you set your things down next to her in the cafeteria. You hummed in agreement, searching the room for a familiar head of dark hair. “You good? Looking for someone? Let me guess: your secret boyfriend that you’re keeping from the rest of us.”

“Yeah, I’m looking for Karasu,” you said before the rest of her words registered. “No!”

“You’re finally coming out and saying it?” she said, holding her hands to her heart and pretending to swoon. “I’ve been waiting for you to confess.”

“He’s not my secret boyfriend that I’m keeping from everyone, I’m just looking for him!” you said.

“Could’ve fooled me,” she said. “What do you need him for, anyways?”

“I got a book for him in the library,” you said.

“Right, and this is the guy you hate? Your ‘mortal enemy’ or whatever?” she checked.

“Yes,” you said.

“But you…got a book for him from the library, and now you’re looking for him so that you can give it to him?” she said. You scoffed.

“When you put it like that, it sounds different than it really is,” you said. “Trust me, this isn’t a nice gesture or anything. You can consider it revenge.”

“When are you going to get over this stupid rivalry?” she said. “He’s not even that bad, you know.”

“Not even that bad? Not even that bad? Are we talking about the same Karasu here? I’m referring to Tabito, not his older sister,” you said.

“Ah, I think so? He’s a nice guy,” she said.

“He is the spawn of the devil! And he’s the one who started it, so I’ll stop hating him once he apologizes and means it,” you said.

“Do you think he even remembers that?” she said. “It was in middle school.”

You glared at her. “I remember it. If he doesn’t, well, that’s just more of a reason for me to dislike him on principle.”

“Okay, okay, whatever you say,” she said. “Sorry for complimenting him. He’s awful and rude and mean. I think he’s sitting outside with some of his soccer friends, if you still want to find him.”

“Thank you!” you said, instantly forgetting that you were upset with her for taking Karasu’s side instead of yours. “Watch my stuff, okay? I’ll be right back.”

“See you soon,” she said. “Have fun. Actually, maybe it’s more realistic for me to just tell you not do anything that’ll get you expelled.”

You waved her off as you marched out to the courtyard where Karasu and his friends were lounging, their chairs positioned in the shade so that they did not overheat while they ate. None of them noticed you approaching until you were tapping Karasu on the shoulder and smiling at him sweetly.

“Y/N? What are you doing here?” he said, sounding oddly flustered. One of his friends snorted, and more than a few chuckled, but you ignored all of them in favor of setting your bag on the armrest of Karasu’s chair.

“Hi, Karasu. I was in the library earlier and I saw this book that reminded me of you, so I took the liberty of checking it out,” you said.

“Oh,” he said. “You didn’t have to do that.”

“You’re so considerate, Y/N!” one of his friends said.

“We’re all so jealous of Karasu here,” another friend, the one who you believed had snorted, said. “You’re way too pretty for him.”

“Shut up,” Karasu said, sticking up his middle finger at his friend, though none of the group paid him much mind. In fact, it seemed to egg them on more, as they continued to hurl jabs at Karasu while simultaneously incessantly complimenting you.

You didn’t respond to any of them, instead pulling out the book and handing it to Karasu, interlacing your fingers and waiting for his reaction. At first he seemed confused, and then dismay dawned upon his features as he realized what he was holding in his hands: a copy of Chemistry for Dummies.

“What the fuck?” he said. You patted him on the shoulder.

“It’s only suitable,” you said. Suddenly, his expression cleared, and he beamed at you, which caused unease to brew in your stomach. You knew for a fact that he was about to say something infuriating, and you mentally prepared yourself to respond.

“What a roundabout way of telling me you need tutoring! Of course, I’m happy to help you anytime you want,” he said, tilting back in his chair so that he could cross his arms over his chest arrogantly.

“Why would I want tutoring from someone who does worse than me in the class?” you shot back, crossing your own arms in retaliation.

One of his friends whistled. “She got you there, Tabito.”

“Enough out of you,” Karasu said through gritted teeth. His friend winked at you and mouthed ‘nice one.’

“Look, man, all I’m saying is that if you want to ask out such a beautiful girl, you’ve gotta have a little more finesse than that!” he said.

“He can have all the finesse in the world, but I’d still say no,” you said. His friends hollered with raucous laughter, which caused Karasu’s face to turn red, but you only pressed the book into his hands. “It’s due in two weeks. That should be long enough, right? Make sure you return it on time, please, I don’t want late fines.“

“I hope you go into debt because of this stupid book,” he said.

“Aww,” you cooed. “You’ll be the one paying it off, so it doesn’t matter to me. See you around, Karasu — or, hopefully not.”

TWO: SHOOT IT

You and Karasu had met in middle school. The two of you had been assigned to work on a presentation together, and he had told you during your first meeting that because you were a dunce, you should just listen to him and do whatever he said. Ever since that day, you had done everything you could to show him how much better than him you were; for his part, he found great joy in getting on your nerves and so took part in every argument with pleasure.

You had long ago proved his middle school self wrong, by anyone’s standards, but at this point it was a habit for you to hate Tabito Karasu as well as a habit for him to hate you back. And of course, habits were hard to form but harder to break, so you would probably continue in that manner until the day you graduated and left him behind for good.

It was just the two of you who did not get along. Your friends were cordial with him and his ilk, and you did not really mind his little group all that much, crude though they sometimes were. After all, it was just in the manner of teenage boys, and when they were not taking advantage of your presence to make fun of Karasu, they were actually a pretty agreeable sort.

In fact, your friend groups tended to coexist most of the time, even having lunch together every now and again — though they were always careful to ensure that you and Karasu were kept entirely separate, or else you both were guaranteed to ruin the cheerful camaraderie with your sharp tongues and quick tempers. The measures they took were admirable, but unfortunately, they were not always enough. After all, what were precautions when compared with inevitabilities?

“Oh my god!” you squealed. “Guys! Oh my god, oh my god, I can’t believe this is happening?”

“Can’t believe what’s happening?” your best friend said, speaking for everyone at the table. They were all tuned in to you now, wondering what the big news might be that would bring about such a reaction from you, given how put-together you tended to be.

“Do you remember that one model I happened to meet while I was out last weekend? Kenyu Yukimiya? He just requested to follow me on social media!” you said.

“No way!” your best friend said.

“Way!” you said. The only warning you got was an arm pressing against your back, and then your phone was abruptly snatched from your hands. You gasped, spinning in your seat and scowling when you realized that the culprit was none other than that scavenging crow, Tabito Karasu.

“What the hell? He’s average at best, why are you so excited?” he said, scrolling through Yukimiya’s profile, his eyes narrowed critically. “Y/N, don’t you have any standards?”

“You’re probably the only person in the entire country who doesn’t find him gorgeous,” you said, exhaling dreamily as you took your phone back from him and stared at the artful manner Yukimiya was posing in for his profile photo. “He was even better looking in person. And sonice, too! They don’t make men like that often.”

Karasu frowned and swiped at your phone again. You held it out of his reach, reaching across the bench to press your foot against his chest, effectively holding him back from further attempts at thievery.

“Let me look at him again!” he said.

“Um, no,” you said. “I don’t need you making more fun of him. I know you’re jealous, but expressing it like this only makes you uglier, just so you know.”

“Looks like they’re back at it again,” one of your friends said, massaging her temples.

“Yup,” one of Karasu’s teammates said.

“Ugly? Ugly? You’re calling me ugly? Have you looked in a mirror recently? Also, get your gross shoe off of my shirt!” Karasu said.

“I have looked in a mirror recently, actually, and incidentally I’ve also been keeping an eye on my follow requests. Guess what? I’m obviously good looking, since a legitimate model wants to follow me! How many celebrities request to follow you, huh? I bet the answer is zero!” you said, though you did do him the favor of swinging your leg back, allowing him to brush himself off in disdain.

“Lots of soccer players want to follow me,” he said. “I’m quite good, you know.”

“That doesn’t count,” you said. “It has nothing to do with how you look. They’d request to follow you no matter how hideous and poorly styled you and your hair are.”

“Are they seriously arguing about which of them is worse looking?” Karasu’s teammate said.

“I suppose so,” your friend said. “They’re both really hot, though, so I don’t know what the big deal is…”

“Geez, they’ll take any excuse to go at it, huh?” Karasu’s teammate said.

“Pretty much,” your friend said.

“Guess all of that tension has to go somewhere,” his teammate said.

“Exactly,” your friend said, shaking her head as she finished up her lunch.

“That model probably only works for horror magazines!” Karasu said. “It barely even counts!”

“He was in Vogue Japan,” you said smugly. “Look it up, stupid.”

“So what?” he said.

“So he’s handsome,” you said. “Like I said, it’s okay if you’re envious of him, as long as you accept it instead of doing this whole weird denial thing. I don’t blame you for it — in fact, I thought you would be. You don’t have much going for you overall, do you? In all honesty, it’s only natural for you to feel like this when faced with what you lack.”

Karasu’s eyes widened, and then he stood abruptly, picking up his bag with one arm and haphazardly pulling it onto his back. “Goodbye.”

“Bye,” you said, not really caring one way or another what he did with himself. Actually, you would prefer it if he wasn’t there, interrupting your meal and your daydreaming about your impending romance with Kenyu Yukimiya.

“Wow, Y/N,” your best friend said once Karasu was gone. “You’re kind of dumb, you know that?”

“What are you talking about?” you said.

“It’s not her fault,” another one of Karasu’s teammates said. “He’s not much better.”

“Huh?” you said.

“Never mind,” your best friend said, pinching the bridge of her nose. “I have a migraine now.”

“Want some ibuprofen?” Karasu’s teammate said. She accepted it gratefully, and nothing more was said on the subject. The rest of lunch passed in a peaceful manner, though strangely, Karasu did not return.

It should’ve made you happy. You wondered, then, why it felt so odd without him there, like there was a gaping maw sitting in the place that should’ve been occupied by him.

THREE: DROWN IT

Ever since the day that Yukimiya had requested to follow you, you and Karasu hadn’t spoken. He refused to make eye contact with you in the few classes the two of you had together, keeping his gaze lowered to his work and his shoulders hunched away from you. You didn’t even try to talk to him; something told you that it would not be well-received, and you weren’t anywhere near confrontational enough to bring up his odd behavior, so the time without him dragged on and on, seemingly without end.

At first, you were happy, and you told your friends as much. It was a much-needed break from the constant aggravation he brought you, and you found your classes without your competition to be almost boring in their simplicity.

“The more you say you’re happy that you and Karasu aren’t talking, the less it sounds believable,” your best friend said, taking a sip from her juice box.

“Believe it! This is what I’ve been wanting since middle school,” you said.

“Is it?” she said. “It sounds like you’re kind of upset.”

“Am not!” you said. She shrugged.

“Sure,” she said, drawing out the word. “Definitely not.”

“Why would I be upset?” you said.

“You tell me,” she said.

“I’m telling you that I’m not upset. You’re the one with the theory, so give me some evidence to substantiate it,” you said.

“Fine,” she said. “You talk about him all of the time, even when you guys are getting along — or, at least, your twisted little version of being friendly, which isn’t friendly by anyone else’s standards but it seems to work for you two, so I won’t comment further. You keep telling us that you’re so delighted he’s leaving you alone, but you do this thing with your face when you say it that makes it super obvious you’re not. It’s not the kind of behavior you’d display when discussing someone you hate as much as you claim to hate him. Finally, there’s a reason half the school thinks you guys are dating, and it’s not just the obvious aesthetic appeal of that match.”

“What? I thought you were just trying to bother me when you brought that up!” you said. She shook her head.

“No, it’s a common misconception. It’s why no one’s ever asked you out. They all think you’re already taken. Actually, the other day, a guy asked me if I thought he might have a chance with you now that you and Karasu had broken up,” she said.

“What’d you say?” you said, half in horror, half in fascination.

“I told him probably not, and that you and Karasu hadn’t broken up, because you were never together in the first place,” she said.

“Oh, okay,” you said.

“Should I have said something else?” she said. You shook your head.

“No,” you said. “What else would you have said?”

“Dunno,” she said. “Look, you need to cheer up. I’m sure that if you just try to talk to him, things will go back to normal in an instant. Then you can return to complaining about him like usual.”

“Talk to him? About what?” you said. She gave you an incredulous look.

“You were pretty mean to him the other day, Y/N,” she said.

“It wasn’t any meaner than what he says to me on the regular,” you said. “And what I say to him in return. I don’t see why he’d be more or less offended.”

“I think it was a little worse than what you typically say,” she said. “Plus, the context was different.”

“How so?” you said. She shook her head.

“That’s for him to explain, not me,” she said. “Come on, don’t be stubborn. Work things out with him. I miss hanging out with the guys.”

“Ah, so that’s why it matters to you,” you said. “Sorry to say it, but I don’t have any plans at attempting conversation with him anytime soon. Like I said, things are finally calm and stress-free for me. He’s the one being immature, as always, so why’s it up to me to make things better?”

“Immature?” your best friend said. “You’ve held a grudge against him since middle school.”

“And?” you said. She squinted at you before pursing her lips.

“Well, I guess the two of you really are made for one another,” she said.

“What?”

The next week would mark the beginning of the swimming unit in PE class, which you were actually looking forward to. You loved to swim, you had ever since you were a child and your parents had brought you into the water for the first time, and the thought of getting to earn a good grade for something you liked doing in the first place was an agreeable on.

In preparation, you decided to stop by the pool after classes were over so that you could acclimate yourself to the motions of the strokes once again. The swim team’s practice had been canceled, and no one else ever used the pool, so you would have the place to yourself, which was just about the closest thing to heaven you could imagine while still living on Earth.

Changing into your school-issued bathing suit and putting your things into a locker, you tied your hair back so that it was out of the way and stepped into the steaming indoor pool deck. The water was a bright cerulean shade, the lanes split by lane-lines which alternated colors to match your school’s emblem. When you dipped your toe into the deep end, you found it was warm, not cold like you had feared. The school didn’t splurge on heating the water of the rarely-used pool, so usually, it was all but freezing. You supposed that they must’ve had complaints from last year’s PE classes, so they had restarted the heaters in order to ensure that no one had any cause to whine about the temperature this year.

For a moment, you just sat on the tiled edge, your legs swishing about in the water, the heels of your palms pressing against the lip of the pool as you closed your eyes and luxuriated in the tangy scent of chlorine. So lost were you that you almost didn’t notice the door swinging open, but the clang of it shutting was unmistakable. Thinking it must’ve been a confused swim team member showing up to a practice that wasn’t happening, you opened your eyes, your lips parting to issue a reprimand that died before it could take shape.

It wasn’t a swim team member. It was Tabito Karasu, wearing a pair of swim trunks and nothing else, his jaw taut and his fists clenched as he inched towards the water. He hadn’t even noticed you, and you didn’t feel inclined to announce yourself, so you let your elbows dig into your thighs, your chin resting in your hands as you observed him.

You had known that he played soccer almost as long as you had known his name. It was the entire reason he was so popular and well-regarded in the school, and an inextricable part of his identity, but until now, you hadn’t quite considered what that actually meant. After all, you only ever saw him in the loose, modest clothing of the school’s uniform, so why would you jump to the conclusion that he was so — so — well, you were loath to admit it, but he had a striking body, and, now that he wasn’t being all cocky and maddening, you could appreciate that even his face was of a similar quality.

Blinking, you cocked your head as he extended a graceful foot towards the first stair leading into the shallow end. Water splashed against it, and he yanked it back like he had been scalded. You could not help yourself from giggling as he did this once and then twice again. On the third attempt, you forgot that the two of you weren’t acknowledging one another and cupped your hands around your mouth to amplify your voice.

“What are you doing?” you said.

“Who — Y/N? I didn’t realize anyone else was in here!” he said, stepping back from the pool and straightening his shorts, though there was nothing wrong with them that required straightening. You sprang to your feet and walked over to him, leaving wet footprints in your wake as you peered at him curiously.

“I was just going to do some laps to ensure that I’m at my best for the swimming unit next week. Did you have the same idea?” you said.

“Something like that,” he said.

“What’s with that whole ritual, though?” you said. “It’s not that cold. You should just get in.”

“Definitely not,” he said. You furrowed your brow.

“Okay,” you said. “Why are you at the pool, then, if you don’t want to go in the water?”

“It’s nothing you need to be concerned with!” he said. “Why are you so nosy? Just go away.”

“I was here first,” you said.

“Fine,” he said, spinning on his heel. “I’ll go, then.”

“Wait! Karasu, wait,” you said, grabbing onto his wrist as he made to leave. “Look, we don’t have to talk to one another or anything. We’re experienced enough at ignoring each other, so there’s not an issue in both of us being here.”

“Is that what you want?” he said.

“Yeah, sure,” you said. He swallowed hard, his throat bobbing, and you thought he would say something, but he only nodded curtly.

“Fine,” he said. You gave him an expectant look, but he did not move from the spot he was rooted in, so you thought that you might as well take the initiative. Looping around to the deep end, you inhaled and then dove into the water headfirst, staying under for as long as you could before finally surfacing and allowing yourself to settle into the familiar undulations that came with swimming.

After a few laps, you took a break, peeking up over the concrete to look at Karasu, who was still standing stubbornly in place, his nose wrinkling whenever he glanced at the pool.

“Hey,” you said. “Are you scared of the water or something?”

He froze. “Who told you that?”

“No one?” you said. “It’s pretty easy to tell as an onlooker. Were you planning on trying to get over your fear by coming to swim when no one was here? That’s dangerous if you don’t know how. You could drown.”

“I’m not scared of the water,” he said.

“Really? Then why’re you just standing there?” you said. His mouth opened and closed a few times, and then finally he hung his head in reluctant defeat.

“Whatever,” he said. Judging by the way he tensed immediately after the confession, he was expecting you to say something cruel, but you only boosted yourself out of the water and tapped him on the shoulder.

“I can help you, if you’d like,” you said. “I’m good at swimming.”

“Why would I want your help? And why would you even offer it in the first place? This is just one more subject you can beat me in, and that’s all you care about, so save it,” he said. “Congratulations, Y/N. You get to be number one this time.”

He looped a dry towel around his neck and left you standing alone, shivering and dripping pool water, a puddle forming around your feet as you gazed at the door he had vanished through.

The class rankings updated again after the swimming unit was over. You were in first place. Karasu didn’t even make it to the top ten. You wanted to celebrate the victory — it was the first time you had beaten him so thoroughly, after all — but for some reason, it didn’t really feel like something worth celebrating.

FOUR: STONE IT

School without Karasu was lonelier than you thought it would be. You hadn’t realized just how much you relied on him until he wasn’t there anymore. Without him, there wasn’t anyone you could exchange looks with across the room when somebody said something ridiculous in class. There wasn’t anyone who you could talk to in the minutes before the period began. There wasn’t anyone who made you push yourself to be better. What was the point of being first if Karasu wasn’t on your heels, ensuring that you stayed on the top for fear of losing to him? It was boring and lonely to try if he wasn’t doing the same.

You and he were still one and two, but it didn’t matter much anymore. The rankings were just numbers. They didn’t mean anything when Karasu still refused to even exchange pleasantries with you. Why would you want to compete when the other party didn’t share your interest? Now, if you managed to pull out ahead of him, it felt more like you had kicked a dog that was already down than if you had actually won anything. When he got first over you, it didn’t fuel your ambition any. You just wished he would come over and gloat instead of sitting there so solemnly, like none of it had ever mattered to him in the first place.

You couldn’t understand why he was so angry. What had you said that was so egregious? You hardly remembered the conversation you had had with him, it was that thoughtlessly done. You really hadn’t meant much if anything by it. One second, the two of you had been squabbling as you were prone to doing, and the next, he was so furious that he couldn’t bear to interact with you even still.

The day you were ambushed was nondescript. It was just like any other Wednesday, and you were walking back home from school when you were forced to stop in your tracks. A tall man — no, he was a boy, probably a year or two younger than you based on his soft and innocent expression — was barring your way, his arms outstretched and feet planted firmly in the ground to prove the depth of his conviction. He had pale hair and sky-colored eyes framed by the longest eyelashes you had ever seen on anyone, man or woman, with a small mouth pinched into an expression of discontent and lines like tire tracks between his eyebrows.

“Who are you?” you said warily, reaching for your phone, though you hardly knew who you would call. The setting was wrong for this to be a mugging, as it was sunny out and you were on a well-traveled street, but you didn’t really know what else to expect from the stranger, who could certainly outmuscle you if it came to it despite his lovely appearance.

“Yo Hiori,” he said. “I play on Bambi Osaka with Karasu. You’re Y/N L/N, correct?”

“Oh, one of the soccer guys?” you said. “Uh, hey. Yes, that’s me. Is something the matter? I’ve never seen you before. How do you even know who I am?”

“I’ve been watching Karasu for a while,” Hiori said with the utmost of seriousness, his hands dropping to his sides now that he was sure you weren’t going to run past him. “He’s a pretty fascinating person.”

“I’m sure,” you said, thinking to yourself that this Hiori kid was more than a little weird. Did Karasu know that he had acquired such a shadow? You supposed he must’ve. He had always been the observant type, so there was no way someone like Hiori would’ve escaped his keen notice.

“He’s been kind of down in the dumps recently, though. Even our coach noticed it. His playing hasn’t suffered too dramatically, but he’s the captain of the team, so he’s the guy everyone relies on for a funny pep talk or a word of advice when things are going south. Nowadays, however, when he’s off the field, he just sulks,” Hiori explained.

“I see,” you said. “That’s terrible.”

You meant it, too. Karasu without his asshole quips and ready jokes was a different person entirely. A person who you missed more than you could let on, even to yourself.

“It is,” Hiori said. “I took it upon myself to do some digging, and I’ve come to the conclusion that the reason is you.”

He was definitely a freak. You vowed to bring it up with Karasu, if he ever talked to you again. Even if he was already aware, it felt like a moral or civic duty of yours to ensure that he was fully informed about the extent that this child was inquiring into his life.

“What kind of, uh, digging do you mean?” you said, neatly avoiding the second thing he had said.

“It was pretty simple,” Hiori said. “One of the guys asked Karasu if he was acting off because he broke up with his girlfriend or something, and he got so mad that he left practice early. I opened up social media as soon as I got home and saw that you’re the only girl he follows, so by process of elimination, I figured the two of you were having some trouble in your relationship.”

“Relationship? I think you’re misunderstanding,” you said. “There’s no relationship. You could hardly even consider us friends.”

“Oh!” Hiori said. “I’m sorry. He’s mentioned you once or twice, so I just thought — and given what he said — and his reaction and all — no, I really am just sorry. It was wrong of me to make that assumption in the first place.”

“It’s alright,” you said. “I’m told it’s a relatively common misconception, so I can’t blame you. At least, it used to be. We haven’t really spoken in a while, so I guess everything thinks that it’s over, even though it never began in the first place.”

“You haven’t spoken in a while?” Hiori said. “Why not?”

“I think I said something that offended him, and we haven’t been on good terms since. Not that we ever really were in the first place,” you said.

“You did? He’s a pretty rational person, so it must’ve been something terrible for him to still be angry about it,” Hiori said.

“Maybe, but I don’t remember saying anything like that,” you said.

“What if you tell me how your last conversation went? Maybe I can help you,” he said.

“Sure, since you’re apparently the resident Karasu expert,” you said. “Wanna walk with me? I was heading home, but we can go to the convenience store and get some snacks or something instead. I don’t want to get in trouble for standing around in front of some random person’s house for too long.”

“Sounds good,” Hiori said. “There’s one a couple of minutes away, so we can head in that direction and keep talking as we go.”

“Great,” you said. “Okay, so the last time we talked…I think it was when Kenyu Yukimiya requested to follow me.”

“Who’s that?” Hiori said.

“He’s this model I met while I was shopping one day. Absolutely breathtaking,” you said. “Just really a stand-up guy. We’ve hung out a few times since then, he introduced me to the girlfriend I did not know he had, the works.“

“Yikes, unrequited love?” Hiori said with a wince.

“It was more of a celebrity crush. His girlfriend is super sweet, though, so I can’t complain. Anyways, I would consider them both casual acquaintances. The type you call to have a coffee with, but not the ones that help you move into a new apartment, you know?” you said.

“Uh, sure,” Hiori said in a tone which suggested he had no idea what you were talking about but was too scared to inquire further.

“Moving on, Yukimiya requested to follow me, and of course this was at the peak of my celebrity crush, so I started fawning over him, which prompted Karasu to take my phone and start insulting him,” you said.

“Interesting,” Hiori said.

“Then I called him ugly, and he called me ugly — that’s pretty standard for the two of us, so don’t look so shocked! After that, I said something about how I had expected him to be jealous of Yukimiya, since he didn’t have much going for him overall, so it made sense,” you said. “That’s when he left and things got weird.”

“Okay, I think I get it,” Hiori said. You waited for him to explain further. He smiled at you pleasantly.

“Right, so are you going to share with the class or am I meant to read your mind?” you said after a moment.

“I don’t want to give anything away that I shouldn’t,” he said. “But it’s a pretty simple issue to fix. Try thinking about what you said from his perspective.”

“He has a dumbass perspective. It’s impossible for me to think that way,” you said automatically.

“Do you think that he dislikes you?” Hiori said, taking two bottles of Yakult down from the shelf, handing one to you and keeping the other for himself.

“I’m not really sure how he feels about me, to tell you the truth,” you said.

“I don’t think he does,” Hiori said. “So, try thinking about someone you like and then imagine them saying to you what you said to them. Would you be inclined to be nice to them after that?”

“Well…” Your tongue was heavy and leaden in your mouth, and you ducked your head as you searched through your wallet for money. “No, not at all. I’d probably hate them for a really long time. Maybe forever.”

“That’s possible,” he said.

“Do you think he’ll hate me forever?” you said.

“Most likely not. Like I said earlier, he’s a rational person. I think that if you say sorry and sincerely mean it, he’ll forgive you. There’s a chance he won’t, though; you’ll have to listen to what he says and accept it,” Hiori said.

“But when? I hardly have the chance to see him in school. He just avoids me, and the building’s so big that it’s all but impossible to track him down!” you said.

“We have a soccer game in the evening today,” Hiori said. “I’m heading over there in a bit. Wanna come? You can talk to him once it’s over.”

“Am I allowed to?” you said.

“Why wouldn’t you be?” Hiori said. “If anyone says anything, just tell them I invited you. Here, I’ll give you the address and time now, and you can decide if you want to show up.”

“Okay,” you said, typing out his instructions in your notes app. “Thanks a lot for your help, Hiori.”

“Anytime!” he said. “Hope to see you at the game!”

“Even if I don’t go, I’d still like to meet you again. You’re a pretty cool kid,” you said, reaching up to ruffle his hair. “Kind of weird, if I’m being fully honest, but cool nonetheless. Karasu’s lucky to have a teammate like you.”

He grinned, and it was a tender, shy thing, as if he was earnestly seeking your praise or approval — like how a cat would bring a dead rat to its master or a child would show their parents a treasured drawing. “Thank you. Even if you don’t try to talk to Karasu…maybe you can still come anyways?”

“Alright, then,” you said. “Since you asked so nicely, I guess I have to. I’ll be there.”

FIVE: TAME IT

The sun was nearing the horizon, but it still had not officially begun to set by the time you settled in the bleachers on Bambi Osaka’s side. Besides a couple of women your mother’s age and an elderly man who must’ve been someone’s grandfather, there weren’t any other spectators. Hiori had mentioned that this wasn’t a particularly serious game, as they didn’t even need to beat the team to make it to Nationals, so it was more like a friendly exhibition game than anything — hence the low turnout.

“Hello, dear,” a woman said when she noticed you sitting by yourself. “Are you friends with one of the players?”

“Yes. Um, Tabito Karasu? I’m his classmate,” you said. Technically, you were there on Hiori’s goodwill, not Karasu’s, but for you to not mention Karasu would be like a betrayal. You weren’t sure if it was him or yourself that you’d be betraying, but either way you did not want to chance it.

“You’re one of Karasu’s friends? Lucky you, then,” she said. “He’s a delightful boy, or so I’ve heard. This is my son’s first year on the team, and he was really nervous to join such a prestigious organization, but ever since his first day, all he can talk about is how amazing his captain is. Karasu’s tough on all of the players, but he really works hard to make all of them feel welcomed, too.”

Bambi Osaka’s team took the field, and you smiled when you saw Karasu in the front, his name across the back of his jersey, a pair of black gloves covering his large hands, an insolent leer on his face as he greeted the other team’s captain. He had not noticed you yet, and you were not sure if this was for the better or worse, because you wanted him to see you, but you didn’t want him to be distracted and play poorly as a result.

“He’s a wonderful person,” you agreed. “He’s the only one in the entire school who can keep up with me, academically or otherwise. I didn’t realize until recently how much I admire him for that.”

The woman’s eyes crinkled around the corners with the ease that came from a lifetime of happiness. For some reason, you thought that she knew something you did not, or could not, but it wasn’t uncomfortable that she did. It seemed to you that being left in the dark was just your lot this time around, and you found that oddly enough, it felt acceptable.

“Is this your first time coming to watch him?” she said.

“Yes, it is,” you said.

“You know, he has this habit before every match of scanning the stands, like he’s looking for someone. I thought it might be his parents, but at the last match, just about his entire family showed up, and he still seemed disappointed,” she said.

“That’s a shame,” you said noncommittally, not sure what else you should say. The woman shrugged.

“Well, I wonder what it’ll be like today,” she said. “There he goes.”

True to her words, Karasu was craning his neck towards the Bambi Osaka side, his eyes darting from person to person until they settled on you. You raised your hand hesitantly, waving at him, knowing that he probably wouldn’t reciprocate.

He turned away almost immediately, but not before you saw him fight back a smile — not the smug type he generally donned, but one you had only ever seen on him once or twice. It was one that made him seem charming and boyish and sweet, that made you want to take back every negative word you had ever said about him. Only now could you understand that it showed who he really was, that at his heart Karasu was that kind of person, not anything like the facade you were so accustomed to, which he showed you for the sole reason that it was what you unconsciously demanded of him.

You had judged him to be horrible, and so he became the bane of your existence. You had told him he was good for nothing, so he disappeared like he really was just that. Everything you said, Karasu went along with gamely, and you wished you could’ve known that earlier, so you would’ve spent less time hating him and more time comprehending these intricacies, which entranced you in the way a spider’s web entranced a butterfly.

“Looks like I don’t need to worry about that child any more,” the woman said as the referee blew the whistle to signal the start of the game.

“Pardon?” you said. “Were you talking to me?”

“No, no,” she said, shaking her head. “I was just musing to myself. Ignore me. Let’s watch the game; I have a feeling that some of our players are going to go all out today.”

Bambi Osaka completely annihilated the other team. Maybe the match didn’t matter, but none of them played that way; instead, they were aggressive and focused, with Karasu at the forefront of every goal they made, commending his teammates and deriding his opposition in the same breath.

That was something you had not expected — he had a massively foul mouth when he played soccer. You had thought that he was rude when he spoke to you, but the things you overheard from him whenever he ran by within earshot made your conversations seem tame. You couldn’t help but pity the poor defenders that he shoved past and spat barbed-wire abuse at.

He was merciless and beautiful and you could probably spend a dozen more hours watching him play without even a trace of boredom, but by the time the sky had turned gold and the sun had dipped towards the ground, the game was over and the members of Bambi Osaka were packing up their things to leave for the night after yet another landslide win.

You snuck onto the field once you were extremely assured that nobody would be upset with you for it, making your way over to where Karasu was chugging a bottle of water.

“Hi,” you said when he was finished, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand and tossing the now-empty bottle into his bag. “You played really well.”

“Thanks,” he said. There was impatience but also longing in his voice, like he wanted you to say something so badly but he knew you would not, would never, and so he would rather get the conversation over with and move on with the business of his life than stick around and waste time with you.

“I’m sorry,” you said.

“What?” he said.

“I’m sorry,” you said. “Karasu, I’m really sorry. I don’t think that you have nothing going for you. I don’t know why I said that. Well, I do, it’s because I wanted to have the last word like I always do, but I don’t mind if I don’t have it this time. Or any other time. Or ever again.”

“What?” he repeated, as though he had been rendered dumb by your confession.

“I miss you,” you admitted. “I didn’t believe I could, but apparently, I can, and I do. A lot. I know that I’m unpleasant and disparaging and haughty when it comes to you, but I won’t be that way anymore if you forgive me for my vices one last time. If it means you’ll talk to me, I’ll be a fool. I’ll be in second place. I’ll be an idiot. But please, please forgive me.”

He took a deep breath. You handed him the bottle of kombucha that you had bought on your way to the game because you saw him drink it so frequently that you figured he must like it. He accepted it gingerly, holding it with the delicacy of a newborn, unscrewing the lid and sipping on it pensively.

“Alright,” he said.

“Alright?” you said.

“I’ll forgive you,” he said. “But on one condition.”

“Anything,” you said.

“You better not do anything as dumb as trying to be mediocre on purpose because you think it’ll make me feel better. What the hell is that proposition, huh? It’ll make me feel worse if anything! I like you because you’re unpleasant and disparaging and haughty and whatever else you said, not in spite of those qualities. I’m sure you heard me while I was playing…anyone who isn’t you would probably be terrified of me when I’m like that,” he said. “Just, y’know, I’m a person with feelings, too, so keep that in mind if you can. Oh, and don’t wait so long to say sorry next time, because it’s seriously annoying for me to feel all out-of-sorts for ages!” he said.

“That’s it?” you said.

“That’s it,” he said. “Hug?”

Ordinarily, you would’ve said no, but you were so weepy at the reconciliation that you nodded and let him embrace you, his arms caging you against his chest, holding you to him so that you could not escape.

“Ew!” you shouted when you registered what he was trying to do, shoving him off of you as he cackled and released you without much of a fight. “Gross, Karasu, you’re disgusting! Get away from me! I can’t believe you did that!”

“I can’t believe you fell for it!” he said as you frantically tried to wipe yourself off, though it was largely in vain. In your emotional state, you had forgotten that he was still drenched with sweat from the game, and you were now reaping the consequences of your poor decision making.

“You’re a bad person,” you said.

“Yeah, yeah,” he said. “Whatever you say.”

“I probably deserved that one, though, so I won’t hold it against you,” you said.

“Smart decision,” he said. “Wait. Unrelated, but whatever ended up happening between you and that model dude? What was his name again?”

“Yukimiya? He has a girlfriend,” you said. “Oh, well. What can you do, right? I’m not upset about it. Besides, everyone and their mother thinks I have a boyfriend already, so it’s probably for the best that it worked out like this. I wouldn’t want his modeling career to be ruined by home-wrecking allegations or anything.”

“It must be a pretty serious not-relationship you’ve got there, if it’s the career-ending type,” he said.

“I’d say it’s pretty serious, yes,” you said. “He’s an awesome guy. You’d like him.”

“I’ll respect it, then,” he said. “But…if you ever find yourself not-breaking up with him, then, uh, let me know. I’ll take you on a date somewhere. We can argue and reminisce about the day we met over dinner or something. It’ll be super romantic.”

He said it casually, but you were more familiar with him than either of you ever could’ve predicted you’d be. He was secretly nervous about how big of a risk he had taken, fiddling with the zipper of his soccer bag, avoiding your eyes while he waited for your response. You let the silence stretch on for a minute, just to make him squirm, and then you poked him in the ribs.

“Karasu,” you said.

“What’s up?” he said, and he must’ve been trying very hard to keep his cool, but his anxiety transmitted through the endearing crack of his voice.

“I have to tell you something,” you said.

“Go ahead,” he said.

“I’m not-single now,” you said. “So. Will you take me on a date this weekend?”

He lit up, so bright that you were all but blinded by the brilliance of his joy. Then he cleared his throat and pretended to check the non-existent watch on his wrist.

“You’re in luck,” he said. “That works for me. I’ll pick you up on Saturday for dinner.”

“Great,” you said. “I look forward to it.”

“Hold on, don’t go just yet,” he said. You paused, about to ask him what else he needed when he stooped over and pressed his lips to your cheek. “Thanks for coming to my game. I’m not really sure how you knew I was playing, but I’m glad you could make it either way.”

“Um — uh — Hiori told me, he told me you were playing, and, er, where to go and what time and all,” you stammered, trying to wrap your head around what had just happened, replaying it in your mind over and over.

“Hiori? I should’ve known he’d be the type to meddle like that,” he said. “I’m not even going to ask how you know each other. The answer will probably make me feel vaguely discomfited, so I’ll abide by an ‘ignorance is bliss’ policy.”

“That’s probably for the best,” you said, composing yourself, though internally, you were imagining what it would be like if you had turned your head, if instead of your cheek his lips had landed somewhere else. “Okay, I should go now. See you on Saturday?”

“One last thing. You’re pretty transparent, you know,” he said, grasping your chin in his left hand and leaning in. Your eyelashes fluttered shut as he grew closer and closer, but right when his mouth was a hair’s breadth from yourself, he chuckled. “Also, pretty gullible.”

Instead of kissing you like you had anticipated he would, he tackled you in another hug. You squealed in protest, but he held fast, his body rumbling with laughter as you simultaneously struggled to escape and clung onto him as tightly as you could.

“I hate you,” you said when your half-hearted efforts proved to be entirely futile.

“Sure you do,” he said.

“You’re the worst,” you said.

“Absolutely,” he said.

“I’m being serious here. You smell!” you said.

“Well, that’s plain rude of you to say,” he said, messing up your hair in what you were sure he deemed to be a punishment, as if being crushed against his sweaty form wasn’t punishment enough.

“Let go of me, you idiot crow!” you said.

“No can do,” he said. “Crows are clingy birds, you know. Even the idiotic ones. Ask me again in twenty years and maybe we can revisit the issue.”

“Karasu!”

[copperbadge]

Lately, it's felt like every time I've started to work on writing, I'll just be getting into the rhythm of it when I get interrupted, either by work or the cats or because the time I'd booked in the library study room is up (you can only do two hours at a time, and only four hours a week total). It was getting to the point where I kept re-reading the same chapter or so of previous work but never managing to add to it.

So I tried an experiment this past weekend -- I found a really cheap rate on a local hotel room, and on Friday I took an overnight bag and a very old laptop with limited processing power and checked into a room about a mile from home for a quasi "staycation". I unpacked and had a quiet night on Friday, as prelude to working Saturday-Sunday. The idea was to write uninterrupted by other people, pets, the presence of all my Stuff around me at home, et cetera.

I had snacks but I also bought meals out, which was nice; I don't often order in or buy out when I'm at home. The way I set up was that I would do fifty minutes of writing with do-not-disturb engaged on my phone and then ten minutes of checking email, texts, etc. since often what pulls me out of writing is a text or an email that needs answering, or the anxiety that I'm missing one that would. If I set it so that every hour I check, well, nobody's going to die if something doesn't get answered in an hour, so the anxiety isn't there, and neither is the distraction. (I found a nice app for this, review later depending on how functional it continues to be for me, but it's a like $4 app called Forest.)

It worked pretty well -- writing for an uninterrupted hour, as long as I know what I'm working on, is very functional for me. I average about two thousand words, that way, though there is a limit to the number of hours I can put in. I ended up doing two hours in the morning and one hour in the afternoon, then switched from fiction writing to clearing out my tumblr drafts and some correspondence for the fourth hour. So it went something like

Go out and get breakfast, bring back and eat in room

Change into lounging clothes and do two one-hour sessions

Go out and get lunch, eat lunch out

Bit of a rest break back in the room

Two one-hour sessions, one of writing; when tired, switch to something that requires less creativity

Go out and get dinner, bring back and eat in room

And then in the evening the plan was to watch movies or catch up on reading, but I ended up being mentally weary, so instead I did some simple tarot reading. It was less divination or even meditation than just messing around, keeping the creativity stimulated; I did a couple of Creative Writing spreads, some very brief divination spreads (I nicked a nice three-card spread here that I mentally call He To Hecuba, and just used it in general rather than for a specific question) and then invented a spread when I was starting to get irritated that the same like, five cards kept coming up, more on this in its own post.

Sunday I did one more writing session but it was less successful, I think partly because what I was writing required a lot of research and partly because the previous day I'd dumped eight thousand words into the file. (Research took longer because I brought the most garbage laptop known to man, and the browsers crash if you try to open Google Maps, but in other ways it was ideal since there wasn't much I could do on it other than write.) But I had a good breakfast, got some rest, packed up easily enough, and headed home just ahead of the rain storm.

I don't think it's something I'll be able to do in that format especially often, since the deal I got on the hotel was an anomaly and Chicago lodging, even just AirBNB stuff, is stupid expensive. But in addition to helping get some work done it was a nice break, so I'm going to look into ways I could swing it on a perhaps monthly basis, or some other way to cheaply spend an entire day alone with decent access to a bathroom/snacks and a way to come and go easily. I've looked into coworking spaces before but they tend to be prohibitively expensive and don't really have the setup I'd prefer; there's a hostel on the north side with private rooms that I might try out but it doesn't seem significantly cheaper than a hotel. I might just have to pick one weekend a month and watch last-minute hotel price cuts where they simply want to fill a room for a day or two.

Anyway, functionally I wrote almost a fifth of a novel this weekend, and one that I wasn't feeling super on fire about; I'm feeling much better about it now that I've got some established plot going and I feel like I "know" the newer characters a bit better. (Also I'm enjoying writing Simon as someone who is absolutely entranced by his love interest and clueless that what he's feeling isn't mild antipathy because they met while fighting over ricotta.) So it was a big help, although if I were to put a budget line item in the Extribulum Press ledger for "writing staycation" it would wipe out my royalties surplus very quickly.

[spaceshipellie]

Your video game ellie oneshot was soooo hot. I was wondering if u could do one where reader eats Ellie out while she’s playing the game

OH ANON I HEAR YOU LOUD AND CLEAR BABE & thank you ♡

gamer!ellie x reader

warnings: fingering (e receiving), eating out (e receiving), sneaky hint at sitting pretty, MDNI 18+

ellie was sat on the couch whilst she stared intently at the tv screen, game controller in hand. you were sat with your knees bunched up on the other side of the couch tapping away at your phone, switching back and forth between pinterest and your notes app.

getting a bit bored of what you were doing you started paying attention to ellie, more specifically, the way her knees were spread. you thought back to the time where she had let you warm her strap whilst she played her game and it got you thinking. you wanted to see how she’d hold up if you were the one pleasing her.

putting your phone down and inching closer, she didn’t take her eyes off the screen whilst you sat snug beside her, head resting on her shoulder.

“hey baby,” she cooed.

“hey.”

you stayed like that for a few minutes just watching the screen as she played before you started toying with the hem of her t-shirt. she didn’t pay it any mind as she was used to you needing to get your hands on her in various ways when you were just relaxing. she was the same to be honest and it was comforting for you both. comforting wasn’t quite the word she’d use though to describe the way your hand started slipping under the band of her sweatpants.

“baby,” she chuckled.

you hummed nonchalantly in response.

“what are you doing?”

she wasn’t wearing any boxers underneath giving you easy access to slip your finger down to her clit.

“nothing.”

“okay, sure,” her breath hitched, trying to still concentrate on the game.

you rubbed slow circles before slipping your finger through her folds and back up again, collecting some of the wetness. you could feel her shoulders rise slightly under where your head rested against the soft material. you started to shift down to sit on the ground and her eyes snuck quick glances at you. nestling yourself on the floor in between her legs, you ran your hands up her thighs before hooking your fingers in the waistband again. as you started tugging she lifted her hips so you could pull the sweatpants down. she paused her game and looked down at you, a flushed smile adorning her face.

“what’s gotten into you suddenly?”

“just wanna taste you.”

she went to put her controller down, ready to avert all of her focus to her girl who was desperate to please her.

“keep playing,” you said as you brought your fingers back to her, parting her folds.

“shit,” she stammered, “okay.”

she cleared her throat and resumed the game, shifting lower in her already slouched position to give you better access. you rubbed your thumb over her clit a few times before tentatively bringing your tongue to replace it, only leaving the smallest licks. you could feel her shudder at how sensitive she was, the contact sending jolts through her body.

“fuckfuckshit,” you could hear from her as she kept making mistakes, her mind struggling to focus on anything other than you.

you hummed against her as you slipped a finger in, curling it and working it in and out of her slowly. in between the flicks of your tongue you would suck at her clit and she’d suck in a breath, fighting the urge to remove a hand from the controller and place it on the back of your head.

“shit, baby i’m gonna come.”

you looked up at her and happened to catch her glancing down at you. the sight she saw, your tongue buried and eyes fluttering up at her was the tipping point. small moans left her lips and you could hear the clicking of buttons had become much more haphazard and lazy. she eventually dropped the controller and gripped the couch as you carried her through her orgasm.

letting out a shaky breath she lightly gripped your wrist and pulled you up so you were face to face, a drunk in love smile on her face.

“i’m so fucking obsessed with you, you know.”

[heavyhitterheaux]

Ghost Part 2

AN: 🤭🤭🤭

Synopsis: Jack makes it known to you that he wants to do right by Ace, but you still have hesitations in the back of your mind. It isn't until he decides to do something drastic that lets you know you had been right all along and that you will do anything to protect your son.

Pairing: Jack Harlow x Reader

Read Part 1 first

Please Do Not Repost My Content Anywhere

After that night, Jack kept trying to call you to apologize, but you were steadily ignoring his calls. The next step was him texting you to plead with you to talk to him, but you were not in the mood to put up with him and didn't want to hear anything that he had to say.

Jack- Y/N, please talk to me. I'm sorry about what happened. It's been almost three weeks since I talked to Ace

Jack- I promise to make it up to Ace and to you if you'll let me 

You- Ace told me that he didn't want to talk to you right now and why all of a sudden are you making it a priority that you talk to him? Any other time you wouldn't care

Jack- Did he say that or did you? And he's my son so obviously I want to talk to him

You- Look, Harlow. I am protecting MY son at all costs and if it has to be from you, then so be it

Jack- But he's my son too

You- Okay and he's only your son at your convenience. You have basically ignored him just about his entire damn life and then get in your feelings when he called someone else daddy. Are you really even upset about not having a good relationship with him or is it your pride that's hurting? I think it's the latter

Jack- Y/N, please. I get that I've messed up but I want to do better

You- We'll talk to you when we're ready

For the rest of October, it came and went without any more incidents from Jack which you were surprised by. Because you were sure by now he would have pulled something.

It was as if he was trying to be better for you and for Ace. But you still weren't sure and still had your hesitations. Why would you trust someone who has given you every reason in the world not to?

One morning you woke up and checked your banking app to see that he not only sent money to pay for daycare, but an extra two thousand. Thinking that it was a mistake, you quickly sent the extra money back, but within twenty minutes it was back in your account and that's when you finally sent him a text.

You- Why did you send me an extra two thousand? I sent it back, but you sent it to me again

Jack- I remembered you mentioned to me a while back that Ace needed some winter clothes so I sent it. Get something for yourself too.

You- Jack, I don't need this much and have you suddenly switched places with someone else? I usually have to beg you to even send money for daycare and half the time you don’t even remember to do it

Jack- It's for the two of you so keep it and no I haven’t

You were simply taken aback and didn't know what to say or make of it.

You- Well, thank you 

Jack- Um do you think I can get him this weekend?

You- the entire weekend?

Jack- Well yeah. If you don't have anything planned this weekend that is 

You- I will see what he says and then I’ll let you know

Jack- Okay

You guess he was trying to make up for lost time, but you were still at the point where you wanted to be done with him. But if he did decide to be in his life, would it be for the long run? Because the last thing you wanted was for Ace to get comfortable with him being around and then he suddenly disappears.

You usually had to beg him to pay for it and remind him every month, but this time he did it without even a word needing to be uttered from you. And he was a week early with sending it to you.

After that incident between Jack and Clay and Ace seeing it, Ace stopped asking to call Jack before his bedtime and it was eventually replaced with Jack calling him and you were surprised by him checking on how you were too.

The last time he did that was before Ace was born. However, you kept it short and sweet and gave him one word answers because at this point, you were tolerating him and nothing else.

There were a few times when Jack first started to call that Ace didn’t want to talk to him and that made Jack's heart sink and he knew that he had to do better. He was now on the receiving end and didn't like the way it felt knowing that this was how Ace felt when he didn't answer the phone.

You didn’t understand where this new attitude and changes were coming from, but you were in no way, shape, or form complaining about it because of how happy Ace was. 

He had taken Ace out a few times with Jack after apologizing properly to the two of you spending the weekend with him and Ace always came back home to you so happy that he was finally getting to spend time with his dad, so the last thing that you were ever going to do was ruin it. 

You take it that it was Clay yelling at him and Ace not wanting to be around him that served as his wake-up call to get his shit together. 

One night after Jack called Ace to say goodnight, he quickly said that he wanted to talk to you once you were back in your bedroom by yourself. 

“Yes?”

“Uh, how are you? Are you okay? Do you need anything?”

“I’m fine and no.” You were trying to keep this conversation short and sweet so you could go to sleep. Unless it had to do with Ace, you didn’t feel that there was a need to talk to him. 

“Umm, would the two of you want to come to NPLH? It’s December 18th. Ace has never seen me perform before and… neither have you. At least I don't think you have.”

When you were quiet and didn’t give him an answer, he spoke up again.

“I.. Y/N, I’m trying to do right by the both of you and it shouldn’t have taken this long. But I am trying to change and be the best possible version of myself for both of you. I'm tired of the disappointed looks that I get from him as well as you.”

“You don’t need to worry about me, just him. I’m used to being disappointed in you, so my expectations regarding anything having to do with you are in hell. Ace is only three so he’s quick to forgive and forget. However, I am not.”

“I… deserved that. I do need to worry about you because you’re his mother. So what do you say? You would be backstage with all of my friends and family. Safe from the crowd, because I know Ace doesn’t like them.”

Now this had you doing a double take because you had no idea that Jack knew that Ace didn’t like crowds. 

“Don’t look so surprised that I know that. Now does that sound okay with you? I can get him those headphones too to protect his ears since I know he hates loud noises. I’ll come and get you both myself before the show starts.”

“And you don’t think anyone will say anything when they notice that he looks just like you? I want to keep him protected from the life that you live.”

“We can deal with it when the time comes. I mean they’re going to have to find out eventually anyway, right? So what do you say?”

“I guess, but I need three more tickets to give to my best friends who actually help me take care of Ace even though they don’t have to and do it because they love him just as much as I do. Even though Ace let it slip to them that you were his dad and they probably have a grudge against you now, they still like your music… at least I think they do.”

“Of course, whatever you want.  And are they going to say anything? Do I need…”

“They don’t need to sign NDA’s and I didn’t even break mine. So, you’re going to make your own son sign a NDA? He’s the one that said it.”

“Well, no. I guess not.”

“Then we’ll be there.”

The day had finally come and Jack had been nervous from the time that he had woken up. He was now eating breakfast with Urban who noticed that his best friend kept fidgeting. Last night he had sent you the three extra tickets which you immediately sent to Nadia so that she would have them.

“What the hell is wrong with you?” He asked while sliding his orange juice closer to him.

“I… Y/N is coming tonight and she's bringing Ace. I’m actually going to get them before the show and bring them to the arena.”

“Oh, the baby mama and son that you act like don't exist. Got it.”

All Jack did was roll his eyes.

“I deserved that, but I'm trying to be better moving forward. I don't want him to grow up and despise me because at this rate, that's exactly what's going to happen.”

“Like bro…. Your parents don't even know about him. And he's what? Almost four?”

“I was going to also ask her if I could take Ace to see them on Christmas. They might be less mad? I mean they’ll see him tonight, but I don’t know if that’s the time or place to drop that on them.”

“I… Jack….. what? Is he supposed to be their Christmas present? You should have told them when it first happened.”

“Either way it looks bad and they're going to want to kill me so I might as well get it all out in the open.”

“So, you went on and on about how she trapped you, but now you're suddenly all in? What changed?” Urban curiously asked.

“Hearing that he called Clay ‘daddy.’ That's me and I’m the only one he needs to be referring to. And the fact that for about two or three weeks after that happened and I tried to call and talk to him, he wouldn't come to the phone. I've been a shitty person towards Y/N and been a shitty father to my first born.”

“Maggie and Brian are going to kick not only your ass, but Clay’s too.”

“At least Clay has been there since he was a month old. I can't say the same thing.” 

“Just do better moving forward, but do you want a relationship with him or are you just mad about what happened with Clay?”

“A little bit of both, not going to lie. When Y/N sent me that in a text, I was pissed but there's no one to be mad at but myself. And truth be told, I don't even know Y/N like I should. I hardly know anything about her for that to be the person that I have a child with.”

“Does Neelam know any of this? Did Y/N sign an NDA?”

“She doesn't and Y/N did when we first started messing around and if she really wanted to come for me and how I've treated Ace….”

“Deadbeat baby daddy.”

“URB! I was going to say that I'm surprised that she didn't break it.”

“Well you have to think, she's protecting him and herself. And the fact that she lives in Louisville too?”

“I just want us to be able to get along and raise Ace.”

“That's literally all that she probably wants but you were making it hard as hell.”

“I know and I can only imagine the looks on my parents faces.”

It was now around 4 PM when you heard a knock on the door and Ace immediately ran towards it and started to reach up to open it, but stopped once you had scolded him.

“Ace! Baby, get away from the door and wait for mommy to open it.”

“But mommy it's daddy! Hurry up please!”

You had to laugh at him telling you please and opened the door with him right behind you to see Jack staring at you.

“Uh hi.”

“Hi.” You responded flatly, but Ace immediately ran and climbed onto him. He figured at least one person was happy to see him.

“Daddy!”

“Hey bubs. You all ready to go?” 

He eagerly nodded, but all you and Jack did was laugh.

“I think you need shoes first though, it's a little cold.”

Once all three of you arrived at the arena, Jack hopped out of his Jeep and opened your door which you were surprised by before going to get Ace out of his car seat. 

All three of you made your way inside and backstage where a lot of his friends and family had already gathered waiting for the show to start. 

There was a variety of different snacks and drinks on display backstage and you noticed two other little kids running around who you knew were Nemo's daughters and Jack's goddaughters.You immediately saw Clay out of the corner of your eye and he came over to hug you before hugging Ace who held onto him tightly.

“Hey, I'm surprised you actually said yes to coming.”

“Not going to lie, me too. But I really did this for Ace and not me. Everything I do is for him.” You said as you pinched Ace's cheek who smiled at you. You noticed that Ace was now a little more quiet and reserved since he was now around a crowd of people that he didn't know and this was typical. It took him almost a month to not sit by himself in daycare and get more comfortable.

You then saw Jack's parents make their way over to you, but just as you were about to speak to introduce yourself as well as Ace, Jack quickly intervened which surprised you and the last thing that you thought would happen did.

“Mom, dad, this is Y/N and her son, Ace.” You did your best to try and hide your disappointment while Ace was being held by Clay next to you confused. Urban was behind Jack and simply shook his head.

So much for saying that things would be different moving forward. 

You talked to his parents for a little while before Ace mentioned that he was hungry and Clay proceeded to grab him something to snack on. Before long, it was time for Jack to do his set and he had given you the headphones for Ace so that the two of you could watch from the side of the stage. 

But what you didn't notice was the rest of PG whispering to Urban.

“Uh, why does that kid look like a mini version of Jack? And who is she?” 2fo asked Urban who tried not to have a startled look on his face.

“Jack can answer that better than I can.” Was all he said before Neelam quickly inserted herself in the conversation.

“So, you know something we don't know in other words is what you're trying to say, correct?” 

“Look, it's not my place. He'll tell you when he's ready.”

“All I need to know is if I'm going to have a problem out of her.”

“Neelam, she's not like that. At least from what he told me.” 

“Well, you can never be too sure and I need to be prepared. I'll ask him about it later. He's worked entirely too hard to just have someone come and mess it up. Matter of fact I need to make sure she signs an NDA.”

—-

It was around one in the morning when all of you had finally gotten back to the apartment and Jack volunteered to put Ace to bed. The car ride back was a little awkward and of course the two of you didn't want to say anything in front of Ace. Once Jack had tucked Ace in, he came back out to the living room where you were and you noticed that he looked nervous.

“Y/N, I want to keep the both of you safe so that's why I didn't say that he was my son tonight.”

“But from your family and friends? What sense does that make?”

“I… Look, just hear me out. Can he spend the day with me and my family on Christmas day? And he can be with yours on Christmas Eve? I just figured that it wasn’t the time or the place to tell them about the two of you.”

Your breath hitched in your throat as you tried not to show how you were feeling on the inside. Christmas had been your favorite holiday up until the time that you were nine. Since then, Ace is the only reason why you started back celebrating it but it still didn't feel the same.

“The time to tell them was four years ago.” You quietly muttered and didn’t say anything after that. 

“Y/N?” Jack called out to you because it had been a few minutes and you had yet to give him an answer.

“Um, you can have him in the afternoon.” That way he could at least open the presents that you had gotten him in the morning.

“But are you going to see your family? I don't want to inconvenience you or keep you from them.”

“No, so it's fine.” You kept it short and sweet and hoped that he would drop it and let it go since you agreed to let Ace go with him.

“Wait, why?” he curiously asked and you couldn’t even blame him for doing so.

��Because I can't see them. And why do you suddenly care so much?”

“Do they not know about Ace too, or?”

“Jack, my family is dead. I literally only have Ace. If I want to visit them, I have to go to the cemetery. So can we drop this now?” You asked while trying to avoid eye contact with him. 

All Jack did was a double take before looking at you with wide eyes.

“Wait… so you’ve…. been by yourself basically this entire time?”

“I don't need your looks of pity. I'm fine.”

“But….”

“Jack, please. I don't want to talk about this anymore.”

“Okay um, I'll drop it for now. But, that means that I'm getting both of you on Christmas morning to spend the day with me and my family and you aren't saying no.”

“Just take Ace, I'll be fine.”

“Y/N, you aren't spending Christmas by yourself.” 

“What difference does it make? This is my normal. Being a mom and then being by myself.”

“Well that stops this year. I do not want you to be by yourself. My family will love you. And you have me so there's no reason for you to be alone.”

“Hmm, yeah the baby mama you kept hidden for almost four years? The Only Fans model that you accidentally got pregnant? And I have you? Really? I had to beg you to even show our son an ounce of attention. And not even going to add in the fact that you thought I was lying about the entire thing and treating me like absolute shit.”

“Our kid is not an accident, Y/N. And I promised you that things are going to be different now. I apologize for how I acted towards you because that wasn't right. I was just scared and instead of telling you that, I ignored it until I created an even bigger situation that ended up hurting you, Ace, and myself.”

“He isn’t to me, but for you when I first told you he definitely was.”

“Please Y/N, us arguing is not going to solve anything. I'm going to tell my parents about you and Ace properly. Don't you think he deserves to know his grandparents?”

“Of course I do. I just never thought that I would see the day where this would become a reality. Not going to lie, when Ace got to be around 7 or 8, I was going to leave and move back home.”

“And where is that?”

“Philadelphia. I just needed to be near people that I could trust while he's this small. I was in D.C. since that's where I had gone to school and that's where I had him so I just stayed there until Nadia wouldn't take no for an answer and made me come down here. At least in Philly, I can hopefully buy the house that I grew up in. It's been on sale for some time and I've been saving up for it or at least trying to.”

“Wait, so you still want to leave Louisville?”

“I mean there's nothing here for me. It's not like I grew up here like you did and have a family that I can see whenever I want. The rest of my family didn't want me so there's that.”

“Well, I want you and Ace close to me. We can't do that if you move away.”

“According to you, I was stalking you, remember?”

“Y/N, can we just hold off on discussing that. One thing at a time and once again I'm not here to argue.” 

All you did was cross your arms and sigh as you then heard Jack’s phone go off.

He looked down to see that it was Neelam and she was asking about you.

Neelam- Who is that girl and her son and why does he look like you? Start explaining IMMEDIATELY 

Jack- I'm with her now, I'll text you later

Neelam- Um, no. Explain now.

Jack- His name is Ace and he's my child and his mother's name is Y/N and he's almost four.

Neelam- What in the actual FUCK?

Jack- I'll call you when I leave. 

“Then it's settled. Both of you are coming with me. I have a shitload of presents for him and they’re all at my house so he can open them hopefully before everyone gets there.”

When you didn’t say anything, Jack simply grabbed your hand, startling you.

“Did you hear what I said?”

“I heard you, but we need to get one thing straight.”

“What is it?”

“You need to be all in with Ace because I refuse to let you break his heart for the millionth time.”

You were on facetime Nadia, Liv, and Blaire trying to figure out what to wear. It was currently Christmas Eve, and you had already put Ace to sleep when you decided to rummage through your closet for something decent to wear for tomorrow and meet Jack's family properly. 

“What about the one that makes your boobs look big?” Blaire asked and you rolled your eyes.

“Blaire, they’re already big and I’m meeting his PARENTS!”

“Well technically you already did. They just didn't know who you were.” Nadia said as she was examining the black sweater dress that you were holding up.

“And I wonder what they're going to say when Jack tells him tomorrow.” Liv added as she was mixing up the batter for her Christmas cookies.

“They're going to be pissed, I already know. But what am I supposed to say when they ask how we met?” You asked as you were now looking for a pair of shoes to go with the dress.

“Wait, how did yall meet? Because we don't even know.” Blaire curiously asked.

“Nadia knows.” You quietly answered and you simply heard her sigh. 

“Well are yall going to spill it or what!?”

“He was a subscriber to my Only Fans.” You quietly said as you pulled out your red and black knee high boots to go along with your dress.

Blaire spit her eggnog out that she had been drinking and Liv was simply looking at you with her mouth hanging wide open. 

“Um, come again? No pun intended. But… WHAT?” You heard Liv yell and all you did was sigh.

“It happened right before my senior year and I've basically been a single parent ever since.”

“Well at least he's trying to do better for the both of you.”

 “I don't care about me. That ship sailed long ago, the only person that I'm concerned about is Ace.”

“So even if Jack does get his shit all the way together and asks you to be in a relationship so yall can start with a clean slate, you would still say no?” Nadia curiously asked and it made you stop and think for a second.

“Yes.”

“Can we ask why?”

“I have seen the absolute worst in this man and how he treated me before was unacceptable and it will always be in the back of my mind. Instead of owning up to what he did, he called me a liar, a gold digger, claimed I was stalking him when I moved here and got mad when Clay wanted to have a relationship with Ace. How could I date someone like that?”

“He’s changing for the better, Y/N. You never know. But, your reasoning is 100% valid. I didn't know he had done all that.”

“Like he’s trying to be all nice to me all of a sudden and asking how I am or if I need anything but if it doesn't have to do with our son, there is literally no reason for me to talk to him. The conversations are awkward and it's like pulling teeth because he knows that I want absolutely nothing to do with him. Like he has to understand how bad he hurt me and the fact that I didn't have my family or anyone around me at that time to help me when he was born. I was scared shitless. There were some days when I couldn't eat because I had to pay for diapers because he refused to. I had to apply for government assistance until I found a better paying job. I have one now, but yet I’m still struggling. I don't think I will ever forgive him for that. My standards for him are in hell and I told him that the other day. I expect absolutely NOTHING from him. But, I would never talk bad about him in front of Ace. At the end of the day, he's going to be taken care of if it's left up to me. Him, I’m not so sure.”

All they did was simply nod at your response.

“I hear everyone talk about him in such a positive light, but that person that they're referring to? I’ve never met him. I’m on my guard because I just have a feeling that he's going to try and pull some shit.”

It was around noon on Christmas Day and Ace was busy playing with his new toys that Jack had gotten him while you along with his parents had congregated in the corner of the living room to discuss Ace. Jack figured he might as well before the rest of his family started to arrive.

“So, we have something to tell the both of you. And we wanted to tell you before everyone else got here.”  Jack started to say while you were sitting next to him and trying not to fidget. You knew that this wasn't going to go over well and there was nothing that you could do to stop it. You were suddenly now more interested in your bracelet.

“What? What is it?” Maggie asked with concern showing on her face.

“Umm, Ace is my son.”

“Daddy, up!”

And right on cue, Ace yelled for Jack and was soon climbing all over him as he picked him up and started to play with his earrings while you were trying to not have a panic attack.

“Your….. what?” Brian quietly asked as Maggie still hadn't said anything. All she was doing was staring at Ace and finally seeing the resemblance between the two of them. Ace didn’t look like you at all.

“He's mine and Y/N is his mother.”

“How old is he?” Maggie asked as you could tell she was trying not to yell.

“Almost four.”

“WHAT?! And you're just now saying something?”

“Because at first he thought I was lying and only after his money which wasn't true and said that I trapped him. Once the paternity test confirmed that Ace was in fact his, he still wanted nothing to do with him. However, Clay did and he's known him since he was a month old.” You confessed as Jack looked on with wide eyes.

“But, we're in a better place now.” Jack quickly said while chiming in attempting to make himself not sound like a complete deadbeat.

“Hmm.” Was all you said in response as you looked down at your nails.

Before they had a chance to respond, Jack's front door opened and in walked Clay with a bunch of gifts in his hands which you assumed was for Ace since Clay had told you previously he had gotten gifts for him.

The only thought in your head was where you were going to put all of them in your small apartment.

All eyes were on Clay and he quickly got a confused look on his face before having a moment of realization.

“Oh, so he finally told you two about being a deadbeat?” He asked as Ace slid off of Jack’s lap and immediately went over to Clay who was setting the gifts down. When he was finished, he quickly picked him up.

“Seriously?” Was all Jack did as he sucked his teeth and rolled his eyes.

“I… people are going to start to be here soon but we'll finish discussing this later. Y/N, you seem like a sweet girl and I commend you for taking such good care of Ace when you didn’t have anyone to help you.” Was all Maggie said before eyeing her oldest son and she stood up to head into the kitchen while Brian just sat there in disbelief.

It was a few days into the new year when you had gotten a call from a strange number on your way home from work as Ace was asleep in the backseat. At first you declined the call, but when they called three more times in a row, you finally decided to answer.

“Hello?”

“Y/N? This is Katrina.”

“Katrina, who?” You asked confused and wondering how the woman that you did not know suddenly got your number.

“Your Aunt Katrina.”

At that moment all you saw was red. She was the one that refused to take you and decided to place you into the foster system since your mother and her had a long outstanding beef that you had nothing to do with and you didn’t even know what it was about. Yet, you were the one that felt the consequences from it. 

“What do you want and how did you get my number?”

“I… I can explain later, but how far away are you from Philly right now?”

“Why?”

“Your grandmother. They’re saying she has probably weeks or even days to live and ever since they told her that, she has been persistent on us finding you.” She quietly said and it took everything in you not to drop your phone. 

“Finding me for what? Yall didn’t want me remember?” You shot back as you pulled into the parking garage of your apartment building. 

“Y/N, please. It wasn’t that simple. But how soon can you be here? She said that there is no way in hell, her words not mine, that she was leaving this earth without seeing you.”

“I… just have to pack my things along with my son. I’ll drive and I should be there by the morning if I don’t make a lot of stops.”

“I’ll text you the details.”

As soon as you hung up, you were in somewhat of a daze. As many years that have gone by, you thought your grandmother would have passed away already. If you did your math right, she had to be close to 100 by now. You felt that your grandparents were the only other people in your family that truly loved you and would have done anything for you besides your parents and older brother. 

You carried Ace inside while taking off his jacket and laying him down on the couch as you ran around the apartment and trying to pack the essentials of what you two might need. You didn’t plan on staying for very long, but more than likely you were going to stay for her funeral. You figured that it was the least you could do.  And get an explanation on why Katrina had given you up so easily.

A quick text was sent to Nadia, Blaire, and Liv telling them that you were headed back home for a family emergency. All they did was tell you to keep them updated as you were now finishing packing your car for the ten close to eleven hour trip. It was around seven at night when you finally got on the road and hit the highway hoping to get to your grandmother before it was too late. You did your best to keep your tears from falling because you felt that you had been robbed.

All these years, she was alive and you had no idea.

It was true that you could have looked for her if you wanted to, but you had it in your mind that they wanted nothing to do with you.

It was around ten at night when Ace had finally started to stir and noticed that the two of you were still in the car and looked around confused.

“Mommy, where are we going?” You heard him say as he startled you.

“We’re going to see the place where mommy grew up. Or sort of for that matter. It’s going to be a long drive so you can go back to sleep.”

“Okay.” Was all he quietly said and you soon looked back in your rearview mirror to see that he had drifted off.

Once you had hit Philly, it was around six in the morning and you decided to find a hotel for you and Ace to stay and actually lay down in a comfortable bed. At least for two hours until you went to go and see her. Being back there was something out of a dream and you made it up in your mind to get a cheesesteak before the two of you left to go back to Louisville since when you get it out of state, it doesn’t quite taste right. 

After getting some much needed sleep, you and Ace set out to your grandmother’s house since that’s where Katrina said she was on hospice as much as you didn’t want to believe her. Once you pulled up to the house, you wanted to cry. It looked the same exact way and it still had the swing set in the front yard that your grandfather built for all of his grandkids. You grabbed Ace out of the backseat, reminded him to mind his manners even if he didn’t need one and proceeded to knock on the door.

You were startled to see your Aunt Katrina open it and it took her a second to notice that it was you seeing as the last time that she was you, you were only nine years old.

“Y/N.”

“Katrina.”

“And who is this little one?” She asked as she stepped to the side to let the both of you in.

“My name is Ace! I’m three, almost four. What’s your name, ma’am?” Ace piped up and said which you were surprised by seeing as anytime he was around new people, he would hide behind you. 

“Well, aren't you cute? Named after your uncle, I see. That makes me your great Aunt Katrina.”

“It’s nice to meet you.” Ace added while holding his hand out for her to shake and you couldn’t help but to laugh.

“She’s upstairs.” Was all Katrina said to you and your legs instantly felt like they weighed a thousand pounds. You nodded towards her and started to make your way up the steps while holding Ace’s hand. Once you got to her room, the door was open and you could hear the sound of the television that was currently on The Price is Right which made you laugh to yourself. When you were at home sick that’s what you would watch.  You walked in to see that her eyes were closed, but you quickly heard her voice.

“About time you showed up. Took them forever to track you down and find you.” Was all she said as her eyes opened and smiled at you.

“My sweet Y/N. My youngest granddaughter.”

That was the moment that you immediately burst into tears as you sat on the bed and hugged her.

“I….” You started to say but she quickly shook her head.

“It doesn’t matter. You’re here now and that’s what’s important.” She comforted you as she held you tighter.

“Now, who’s this young man?” She said when the two of you finally broke apart and she now noticed Ace standing next to you.

“Your great grandson, Ace.”

“Ace, I love that name. You know you’re named after one of the sweetest boys that I ever knew.” She said as Ace climbed up to sit next to her.

“Really? My mommy always tells me that I’m named after someone really special.”

“That you are.”

Your grandmother had sent Ace downstairs for Katrina to watch him as she wanted to speak to you alone and now you were suddenly nervous.

“First off, never think for a second that a day went by and I didn’t think of you. Or that I didn’t do my hardest to try and find you after you had gone into the system. Katrina was dead wrong for how she handled it because of a simple grudge, but also more wrong in telling those people that me and your grandfather didn’t want to take you. Instead I spent years trying to track you down with no luck. I wanted you and wanted to keep you, but you had moved around so many times that eventually, the state lost the file that tracked where you were leaving me no leads. I looked from the time that you first went in to try and get you back, up until the time you turned eighteen.”

“You… wanted to keep me?”

“Of course I did! Left up to me, there was no way in hell one of my grandchildren was going to be put through that, but… I’m just happy to see you alive, well, and thriving. That son of yours is beautiful and he has your smile. He has the best mother that anyone could ask for and I know it.”

“So, all this time?”

“It wasn’t until my diagnosis about a month ago when I said, no, demanded that Katrina find you. It was the least she could do for what she did. She started to feel guilty where it started to look like I would never find you about the time you would have been fifteen. I figured if these are going to be my last few days here, I need to see Y/N. I wanted to tell you how much I love you and that I have a little surprise for you.”

“I’m just happy I got to see you and that you got to meet my heart outside of my chest and reason for living. What is it?”

“I know how much your parents and your brother meant to you and that you don’t have many things to remember them by. So, I noticed that the house all of you used to live in went on sale….”

All you did was gasp and your heart started beating a mile a minute having an idea about what she was about to say.

“And I bought it. And put the deed in your name. I know that you’re in Louisville right now, but whenever you’re ready, it’ll be here waiting for you.” She said as she opened her bedside table and handed it to you.

“I… I literally don’t know what to say.”

“You don’t have to say anything. That’s the least that I could do for you. I hope you can accept that as my apology and you have to promise me that you’ll pass it down to Ace so it can always stay in the family.”

—

Your grandmother passed the very next day and knew that she only held on long enough so that she could see you and make sure that you were okay. At least you now knew that she never stopped trying to find you while you were in the system and wanted to keep you so that she and your grandfather could raise you themselves. You were currently at your hotel with Ace as he was playing with one of the many toys that Jack had gotten for him when your phone suddenly went off. You had been in such a daze for the past forty eight hours that you had forgotten to even look at your phone or tell him what had happened for that matter. Your only priority was getting here safely before it was too late. Because you knew that you wouldn’t have been able to live with yourself if you didn’t. 

“Hello?” You tiredly said as you glanced at the clock on the nightstand that read 11 AM. Soon it would be time to head over to your grandmother’s house to start planning the funeral.

“Where have you been? And why haven’t you answered my calls? Where is Ace?” Jack all said in one breath and you quickly got annoyed. You had enough to deal with at the moment.

“Well hello to you too. I’m okay, thanks for asking.”

“Where are you and why haven’t I heard from you? I went by your apartment and you weren’t there.”

“I’m in Philly. I’m back home.” Was all you could get out before Jack immediately started to raise his voice and not letting you explain the reasoning for you actually being there.

“And you took my son with you?”

“Uh? Why wouldn’t I? He’s my child and I wanted to show him where I grew up and don’t you have a career to focus on? You were going to keep him the entire time I was up here?”

“So, that’s the game we’re going to play now, huh?” He said and you couldn’t help but to be confused. 

“Jack, what are you even talking about? Who is playing games?”

“That was your damn plan the entire time. Move back home and take Ace with you.”

“Jack, that’s not…”

“Okay, I got something for you too. Expect me to file for full custody once he’s back across state lines.”

He immediately hung up and you were left speechless. 

You knew it.

You fucking knew he would pull some shit like this.

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[mediumgayitalian]

Hello I really love your work and was wondering how long it took U to get this many followers cause I don't have many and I want to get better at writing cause I have loads in my drafts but I don't think that they are that good so I was wondering if U had any tips on writing and how to get more ppl to see your work thank U sm 🤪

okay so im sure this is irritating to here but i am not worried about followers! i have been in the past and it makes writing miserable for me. i obsess over stats. engagement is good -- i love attention, you love attention, we all love attention, and being told our work is good is a motivating thing to hear -- but obsessing over follower count Will make writing hard for you. i pinky promise.

as for improving on writing, i have some more solid advice for you:

PRACTICE. write every day, even if its shit, even if its 50 words, even if it never leaves your notes app. write.

switch writing mediums if you're struggling. when i have writers block on my phone i switch to google docs. when i struggle there i switch to tumblr drafts. then to instagram DMs. then to a random notebook website. then to the fucking search bar of google. to physical paper. to comments on long-dead youtube video. to my actual wall with pencil. to the dirt outside. i write EVERYWHERE. putting my thoughts in new physical spaces helps crack me out of the block every time. so do weird constraints like character limits or a pen that's running out of ink. switch shit up and apply light pressure.

read with the intention of learning. that means actual writers craft books, or reading work you admire with a close lense.

analysis!!! to build off the last point, when you read something that is profound, or makes you feel something, STOP -- take the time to feel it, to love it, then tear it apart. what actions is it describing? how do you know? what emotions do the actions provoke? what references are made, and why does that matter? what objects are present? what do they signify? how can you tell? you need to do LITERARY ANALYSIS. you cannot learn to write without learning to read. (this is called 'close reading analysis'. if you want some help practicing, let me know. i'll show you a couple examples.)

critically read your own writing. what is strongest? what do you do well? what needs more practice, and what exercises can you do to get that practice?

write what you enjoy. this is why i cannot and will not do commissions -- they suck the fuckin' life outta me. as soon as someone tells me what to do it stops being fun. i write things as they pop into my head bc that's what i enjoy doing.

use prompts. I DO. it is so helpful. can't think of a goddamn thing to write? look up a dialogue prop. find a song, use it as a plot background. rewrite an existing scene. you know how artists trace to practice their skills? put a scene in your own words, that's the writing equivalent.

go on walks and space the fuck out. when im low on ideas, or i cant get myself to focus, i put on headphones and wander around the neighbourhood. my brain goes off wherever it goes and i let it. it usually returns with an idea or five.

practice no-phone time. boredom is the boat of creativity. stare at a wall, pull weeds, doodle, pace, whatever you need to do to get your brain whining about needing your phone in front of your face, because if you ignore that long enough the ideas WILL come and they will come in swathes.

study film as well as literature. ive talked about it a little bit before (here) but learning how the camera and audience are intrinsically linked to a story will help you learn how to pace and structure it.

i have other stuff but that's a good list i think! some of my other writing advice is linked here, here, and here. good luck!

[kingdoms-and-empires]

After Dark Review (Zombies!)

I recently had to go travel and read a few works that I never got around to reading but was interested in.

PLEASE REMEMBER THIS REVIEW IS DONE BY ME AS A READER AND IS MY OWN OPINION.

This means I will review in accordance to my own tastes, how the game caters to me, and what I feel. Do not take my word as gospel, what I may not be interested in or dislike, may be what YOU are interested and love!!!

@dalekowrites

Synopsis:

A few years from now, in Little Peak, Michigan, a teenager is ready to go to sleep.

While the heavy industry is more active than ever, the effects of global warming are evident, with higher temperatures, dying bees, and animals acting weird.

It has simply been another normal Wednesday, but little do people know that it’s the last day of normality Mother Nature has granted them.

After Dark is a scientifically accurate apocalyptic horror. You’re tired of zombies rising from the ground for no reason? You don’t believe in ghosts? Glittering vampires aren’t for you? Then you have to try one of the three different stories that unfold in After Dark.

When a global pandemic starts to transform people into dangerous monsters, which path will you choose? Will you fight for humanity? Will you stay for your family? Or will you run away in search of a better future?

Review:

The Good: Why does every IF Zombie game have the authors kill themselves in the coding department? This is in the good section, so it isnt a bad thing, though sometimes I worry for the sanity of the author lol. Anyways, After Dark is ambitious! Here are some of the things the author implemented:

Three different routes with three completely different stories. (1 is being worked on right now, the other two have not yet been implemented yet as far as I know)

A phone with a social network, gallery for the ROs, a newsletter, and a weather forecast app... of which you need to charge without it being annoying thankfully!

Characters remember what you talk about and will bring it up in future conversations, so you cant be two faced lol

A romance autonomy system that you can switch on that allows ROs to flirt with you!

Random encounters to encourage re-playability.

An inventory system.

A weather system, that can be prepped for using the weather app on your phone.

Hourly progression system, there are only a set amount of hours in a day that you can use to do things without affecting you.

Discoverable side stories.

A private journal that keeps track of stuff for you. Kinda Elder Scrolls coded and i jive with it haha

And crazy enough, there's more. The above sounds complicated and overwhelming, but it isnt for the reader somehow. The author was able to integrate all the above without it feeling intrusive or annoying.

As for the story itself, remember this is currently one route. The writing is well done, it isnt overly flowery or super descriptive to the point of walls of text. Instead it gets to the point effectively and without losing points.

It made me want to read more, and that is exactly what we readers look for as we scour the IF space for more stories.

ABBY

I really like Abby. She's the preggo lady you can find, and I love the humanity she brings to the story. She does some things thatll make you go:

All of the characters feel grounded and not tropey if that makes any sense. And the dynamics of the group can change with the MC's input, or lack of it.

And then food. Holy shit, the need for food actually felt immersive lmao, whenever id find a snack or something id snatch that mfer up

The Bad:

I would like more zombies. The characters, the narrative, and the plot works well. But I'm worried of being presented with more human on human conflict/drama instead of the undead, and to that I recommend the author to introduce more scenes where we can see the horror, eeriness, and sadness that such an apocalypses would induce. Make a scene where the player is being chased by the undead because of a fuck up, it can be MC's or one of the characters to create tension or drama and it can even make an RO moment occur. Or a scene where you can enter a school, or one of the FEMA camps and see the aftermath of an incident where the zombies break in or someone infected got in. Of course, the author is steadily updating, and what I just said may very will be in the cards of a future update! But I do think something involving the zombies should occur sooner than later, as the beginning scene with the parent and the chaos, horror, and tension of the scene still stayed with me, and i was hoping to reach those emotional heights again while playing!

The Ugly:

Other than a few gender variable errors of the ROs and the regular grammar mistakes found in any IF, the biggest issue i had was with presentation. I'd recommend the author to clean up the spacing between paragraphs in the future when they have time alongside the new update.

The Aftermath:

Zombie IFs just don't seem to miss. Almost all are able to land within the "good" category whenever one releases, and this has the potential to land right in the "Chef's Kiss" tier. I'd recommend this game to anyone craving a zombie IF, and im excited to see this develop more in the future! The characters are grounded, flawed but not annoyingly, and capable. The story is plausible, and the narrative makes sense. Honestly? I want more and I want it now!

[rosedorada]

THE COWBOY YOU ARE | J. Escuella

javier escuella x f!reader

tags ; smut, cursing, riding a cowboy (iykwim), cowboy hat rule (look it up), afab anatomy , dry humping, p in v, switch!javier, switch!reader, teasing, cockwarming but only for a few seconds

wc ; 749

a/n ; save a horse, ride a cowboy ;) | my first smut on this app, so why not make it my boy javier

if wear the cowboy hat, you gotta ride the cowboy.

“You’re treading on thin ice, princesa” Javier sets his hat down on the table and huffs as he sits down. [ princesa - princess ]

“Is it so bad,” You sit down on his lap, “that i just wanna wear your hat?” Your hand goes to grab it and he swats it away.

“You know what happens when you wear my hat.” He warns you. Of course you knew what happened when you wore his hat, that’s why you wanted to wear it.

“Yes, Javi, I know what happens.” You grind down onto his lap and he swallows down a groan.

“Mierda, oh go-“ Javier bites down on his hand as you continue to grind down on him. The entire camp was either asleep or just in their tents doing stuff. So, you two were pretty safe out here for a bit. [ mierda - shit ]

“Shh, Javi.” You slowly reach for his hat with your right hand. Putting it on your head once you had a secure grip on his hat. “Oops…”

“You did this on pur-“ You grind down on his dick again, stopping him mid sentence. “God.” He whines and bucks his hips up against yours. That was your breaking point.

✭ ✭ ✭

“Javier-“ You manage to moan out his name as he kisses up and down the upper half of your body, leaving your jeans buttoned almost on purpose. You grip onto his hair, ruining the low ponytail he had it in.

“You don’t know what you do to me, especially when you do this.” He stands up, fixing the brim of his hat that was on your head. “I wanna see you ride me like the cowboy you are, since you’re obviously one now.”

You rubbed your thighs together for some friction, anything, to soothe the ache between your thighs.

Javier seemed so dominant until you slowly sat down on his dick, every time you’d grind down he was a whimpering, whining mess. Gripping at your hips, helping you ride him.

“Por favor, te necesito... Necesito esto.” Javiers nails dug into your hips, making you moan a little too loud. [ please i need you… i need this ]

When you both bucked your hips at the same time, it made your vision go white. It practically made you scream out in pleasure.

“Javi,” You throw your head back as you claw at his chest. “God… you’re so-“ You struggled to talk in between moans and whines that would escape every so often.

Javiers hands slowly slid up your body, cupping one of your boobs. His calloused thumb sliding over one of your nipples, making you shiver. “You don’t know how much… I- dios… worship you.” [ dios - god ]

It was true. As his hands went up to your face he flicked the brim of his hat up, exposing more of your face. It was red and had a thin layer of sweat covering it.

“I’m close-“ You struggle to moan out the words, gripping and clawing at Javier’s chest.

“So am I, hermosa. Just… mierda… a little bit longer.” He let’s out an animalistic groan as he looks down and sees where you two were connected. [ hermosa - beautiful | mierda - fuck ]

You eventually dive down and start kissing him once his moans and whines got too loud. He got more aggressive with his thrusts, though they were sloppy it still bucked your body upward.

Javier takes both of his arms and gropes your ass needily, like he was a starving man and you were his first meal.

He dips his left hand down to play with your clit, leaving you a moaning mess. Javier seeing you come undone this fast and this easily made him rut into you.

“Ple- please… I-“ Javier manages to groan out, “Inside…” He started panting, “you… p-please.”

“You can…” You grip onto his shoulder, feeling him thrust one last time into your throbbing cunt until he eventually came.

Javier puts his arms around your waist, pulling you flush against his sweaty body. His face was slightly flushed, and his lips were swollen. He was trying to catch his breath but he had the most intoxicating smile on his face.

“So… how was the ride?” He looks up at you with hooded eyes, obviously trying to joke around.

You roll your eyes, kissing his forehead and pushing the stray hairs off of his forehead before getting up off of him to lay beside him.