#barty x james

[myfavcharacterdidntdrown]

People are saying that jegulus is just like Drarry but. BUT! HAVE YOU SEEN SUNKILLER? THAT IS LITERALLY A FUCKING COPY OF DRARRY.

Like:

“wHy So TeNsE pOtTeR?”

“sHuT uP cRoUcH!”

Yk what I mean

[not-rab]

James: Stop buying plastic skeletons for Halloween. It's terrible for the environment.

Barty: Yeah. Locally sourced, all-natural skeletons are much more environmentally friendly!

James: Yeah!

James: Wait what-

[miruloveu]

regulus: ...

Barty: uhm..

Evan: *observe the scene*

James: *stares at Barty*

Barty: uhkmm...

James: *stares barty in the soul*

Barty: potter-

James: I want you to rip out my guts out bite so hard it makes me bleed,I want you tò leave bruises on my skin I WANT YOUR HANDS ON MY NECK CHOOKING ME-

remus: *picks James up like a sack of potatoes* lets go progs we have you meds

regulus:

Barty:

evan:

regulus:..

Barty:...

evan:...

regulus: *horrifying silence*

evan+Barty: was hot

[risetherivermoon]

James, age 9: hey mum? i have a question

Effie: hm? alright then, lay it on me

James: who would be a better father? me or barty?

Barty, age 8, with his arms folded, standing next to james: 😒

Effie: why are you asking this?

James: mum! its important

Effie: Ok! Barty,

James: WHAT?!?

Barty: WHAHAHA

Effie: hes more responsible, somehow

Barty, running out of the room excitedy: WOO I GET THE KIDS IN THE DIVORCE ITS BEEN SETTLED

James, going after him: WAIT WE NEED TO WORK OUT A CUSTODY SCHEDULE!! BARTY!!

Monty: kids??

Effie: i stopped questioning it a while ago

[eucalyptusbrainrot]

lol imagine barty going around telling people he and james are dating for shits and giggles and if anyone asks evan whole heartedly agrees and tells people about the time he walked in on them with a disgusted look on his face and dorcas cringes and says she remembers that meanwhile the marauders are really confused and keep reassuring james they would support him if he is gay but would have to think about supporting his choice in boyfriends

i also love james as just, agreeing wholeheartedly. going with it without any hesitation, james just seems like the type of guy to roll with a rumor for shits and giggles. (or maybe that’s just me and i’m pushing my view on him, idc it just seems right.)

[theres-an-endless-starry-sky]

ALL RIGHT IM FUCKING SAYING IT

This is a safe place for ALL ships and shippers

The only thing that this excludes is incest (regulus x Sirius) and severe underage (aka snape x Harry)

Other then that go fucking wild okay??

[multishipperofgaydeadwizards]

barty "baby, I'm yours" crouch jr

[vomits0cutely]

James: takes care of everyone else before himself

Barty: takes care of James before anyone else

[olivers-cocoapuffs]

Baby Darksun

[king-of-horny]

When barty met James, he didn't understand what Regulus saw in him, Barty thought James was dumb, but when he saw him playing Quidditch, all sweaty and hard, he finally understood Regulus

[stagpdf]

Barty tosses the plastic bag full of gas station snacks to the back of the car and pops the two slurpees into the cup holders, Barty’s brown concoction of different flavors looking rather depressing next to James’ bright blue.  

“Did you get the purple skittles you know I like those better—”

“Yes, Jesus James, I got your stupid fuckin’ purple skittles. And your chips too. Don’t insult me.” Barty scoffs at the idea, acting as if he hadn’t screwed this exact thing up the last time they went on a road trip together. It’d ended in an argument so bad James hadn’t even gotten a blowjob out of it. 

“You don’t exactly have the best track record. And since you three refuse to give me any kind of gas money this is my pathetic form of payment for the trouble.”

Barty puts on an overly-offended face—mouth stretched open to the point of possible tearing, eyes wide, and a hand over his chest. “Trouble? As if you didn’t practically beg to come along.”

Given the audacity of the statement, James figures it his turn to play up how much they affect him and physically recoils at the words. “Beg? I did not fucking beg. If I recall correctly you were the one who refused to fuck me until I agreed to come.” James turns in his seat, giving Barty a full view of himself as he crosses his arms and just looks at him. 

“Tomato, tomato. Who cares? You’re here now, let's not worry how we got to this point.” 

James rolls his eyes, turning back forward to start the car and pull out onto the road. Barty messes with the aux, making sure to bend it just right so the frayed wires are able to function correctly. The quality of James’ busted speakers is ass, but it hardly even matters as Barty opens his big mouth once more.

“You’ll want to make a right soon to get to Evan’s…”

James tunes him out the second he hears Evan’s name, quietly seething as he drives. Evan this, Evan that. It would be too soon if he never heard his name or saw the guy again. Evan with his weird obsession with death, his off-putting demeanor, and a stare which sent chills straight to James’ soul. No matter how hard he tries, James just couldn’t get a read on the guy. Even now, years of knowing him, James still has no clue if Evan even likes him or not. 

And that’s not even scratching the surface. Evan and Barty have this thing, and it drives James up the walls. It’s different from anything he has with his own friends—sure he’s close with Sirius and Remus, but Evan and Barty operate on a whole different level. It makes it all the more ridiculous how irked James gets because he knows well enough by now that it’s not romantic. It’s just weird. And he knows perfectly well he’s not jealousy because who the fuck gets jealous over Barty Crouch.

Not that he would have any right to complain or be jealous if it was romantic. Him and Barty are just….him and Barty. James has no desire for that to change. Whatever. 

He cuts Barty off mid-ramble. “God, why the fuck did I even agree to this ridiculous-ass road trip anyway.”

Barty doesn’t falter. “‘Cause my dick’s so good you couldn’t bear to go a week without it.” Barty grins, it’s all teeth and his eyes are a little too wide. The metal of his smiley glints in the late-afternoon sun filtering through the windows. James hates it. He wants those teeth to sink into his skin.

He also doesn’t have a rebuttal for Barty’s response, knowing all too well that if he tries to deny how good Barty’s dick is now they’ll waste even more time as they pull over and he rails James into the backseat. 

In the short span of time when James just glares at him, refusing to give Barty the satisfaction, the asshole takes a drag from his newly-acquired vape and exhales directly into James’ face. The flavor is banana split, or something equally disgusting, and smells downright rancid. 

“Blegh.” James gags, reaching his hand out and shoving at Barty’s face, ignoring the fluttering in his stomach as he barks out a laugh, high-pitched and hyena-like. It’s a terrible laugh, really. Ugly even. 

James never wants it to stop.

[chaoticmultifandom28]

Headcanon #3

The males of the slytherin skittles had a crush on James at one point in their life and they gossip about James and their crush on him when they are drunk together. For Evan and Barty the crush only lasted a month to three months. James was all their gay awakening and once the awakening settled Barty and Evan realized that James wasn’t their type completely (that was closer to home) and they realized long before Regulus that regulus wasn’t just crushing on James and that it was more. They were like ‘we know’ when regulus panicked confessed that he was in love with James

[miruloveu]

regulus: I need you to come meet me, and I need you to come alone.

james: And I need you to be less vague and weird.

[risetherivermoon]

james, walking past: "oh hey barty!"

barty: "you look like an unwashed weasel with its head inside its ass, you unnecessarily sweet, sexy bitch with stupid loving eyes."

james: 🧍 "oh.. thank you? i think?"

barty, internal monologue: "good job barty, you played that off well, James has no idea you're in love with him."

[star4daisy]

Compass

rosestarkillerchaser band au (2/2)

“This looks like a badly shot porn.” Regulus deadpanned with a little sideway smirk, making them all laugh.

“I can see the title of it already,” Barty extended his hands like he was presenting a title. “A naive hot reporter is deceived into doing a sex tape with the sexiest band around.” he teased, causing Regulus to lean on him as he tried to hide his giggles on Barty’s shoulder.

“It’s not that bad, just go directly to the part where you start kissing,” James demanded, too embarrassed to think about his naivety.

“Oh, sweetheart.” Evan kissed his cheek. “They’re only teasing, there’s no way you could’ve known what we wanted.”

He turned to him to gauge whether he was also making fun of him, but Evan’s eyes were clear and sincere, a small smile on his face as he reassured him. James couldn’t contain his smile when he kissed him slowly and sweetly.

“I literally told him to take his shirt off when we told him to do an interview with us, how did that not clue him in?” Barty kept going, he wasn’t one to leave anything unfinished.

Regulus choked on his drink. “You told him to what?”

“I had to know what we were working with,” he defended himself as he took a swing straight out of the bottle.

James used the opportunity to shove him away from them. “You’re a pig.”

“Yeah,” Evan agreed, he loved to make fun of Barty. “I knew I wanted him the moment I saw his lovely eyes,” he bragged. 

James sniffed jokingly. “You just want me for my body,” laughter reverberated around the place as Barty threw his arms around him dramatically and held him strongly as he pretended to lament and regret his choices.

last part is out now babes 😉

(@jaylienpotter)

[marauders-rarepair-fics]

I'm not sure if this counts as rare pair since it's a quad but

https://archiveofourown.org/works/54228823 It's rosestarkillerchaser, fake dating troupe

Hi! Since this anon posed the question, I thought I’d just put a little PSA that “pairings” isn’t subjected to couples only, poly ships are A-okay and welcomed, in fact.

If you’re into poly ships, go check this one out!