#being a non-hrt afab person

[theygender]

As an afab nonbinary butch who's trying to gain muscle without losing weight the sexism in the exercise industry makes me fucking see red. Just found an exercise program that boasts being entirely based in science and has the sources to prove it with well-controlled, recent, and relevant clinical studies backing up all of their stuff and as someone who's pretty well-versed in scientific research and fed up with fad-based pseudoscientific bullshit in the health industry I was fucking ecstatic. They had a little quiz you could take to find out which program would suit your needs the best so I filled it out and when it asked me about my goals I selected "I have a low amount of body fat and want to build more muscle" and it took me to a program called Strong. Great! ...Except as I read into it I kept finding references to "burning stubborn fat" and other similar shit. Scrolled down to the FAQ and found a question where it explained that this program was different from their Build program bc Build is "better suited for those who are skinny and at a relatively low body fat" ...even though that's exactly the option I selected in the quiz. Turns out they have three options for males: one for people who want to lose weight without focusing too much on muscle mass, one for people who want to become leaner by focusing on both weight loss and muscle mass, and one for people who want to gain muscle mass without losing weight (Build). But for females, they've only got two options, and neither one of them are designed to help you gain muscle mass without losing weight. I would ask why tf it's ALWAYS assumed that women have to want to lose weight but I know it's fucking sexism

[poniesart]

Here is a little comic I made about some thoughts I’ve been having recently. I don’t ID as transmasc, and I have noticed that since I’m nonbinary and AFAB, some people in queer circles (online and irl) label me as transmasc! This has increased since I started T. Much love to my transmasc siblings, but I don’t identify with that term, and it misgenders me.

I figured if there’s not a lot of acknowledgement or discussion about non-transmasc and non-transfem people who physically transition, I can make some myself :)

Thank you to @/rjalker for the ID below!

[ID: A nine panel comic, done is low-saturated colors, mostly featuring soft yellow and shades of blue and purple.

Panel 1 reads, "I am an AFAB trans person on T." showing a surface with a towel, and an open packet that reads, "1% 25mg".

Panel 2 continues: "And I'm not transmasc." and shows a rainbow flag, and a nonbinary flag hanging above some jewelry.

Panel 3 shows a person walking on a hill, the sky pale yellow and the ground in shades of blue. It reads, "My gender isn't woman, or man, or adjacent to either, or neutra/ 'in-between'." The venus and mars symbols float in the air, in red and blue.

Panel's 4, 5, and 6 read, "It's a separate, other, gender." Showing shoes worn under a light blue skirt, a person wearing a shirt, jeans, and vest waving, and a person without clothes floating among stars.

Panel 7 reads, "Queer people who know I'm on T, or even just know that I'm AFAB, often think I'm transmasc." "They label my experiences automatucally." The same person from before is shown between the two sentences, sweating nervously as though being trapped.

Panel 8 reads, "It feels like misgendering. From people who should know better." The person is shown sittign facing away from the camera, head bowed, lifting one arm across zir shoulder, where half a dozen flags have been stabbed into zir back like arrows, all dark blue, and marked with either the blue mars, or pink venus symbol.

Panel 9 reads, "'Masculinizing' HRT doesn't mean I'm transmasc." Next to a small picture of the person smiling away from the camera, wearing blue glasses, with stubble on zir chin. The next small image is of the chemical symbols for testosterone, with text next to it that reads, "It doesn't mean my gender is male, or male-adjacent." Followed by another small picture of the person, smiling with hearts next to zir face, wearing the nonbinary pride flag like a blanket or cape.

The yellow background fades downward into the nonbinary flag, with stripes of yellow, white, purple, and black, here with the purple and black in shades of blue. The text reads, above a final drawing of the person, wearing a pink sweater and a blue skirt, smiling up at the camera and surrounded by small sparkles, "It just means I'm a nonbinary, genderqueer person who is becoming more like zirself. And that just happens to involve HRT!" with a smiley face emoji at the end.

End ID.]

[hiiragi7]

Exercise: Exposing intersexism in yourself

Perisex (non-intersex) people please take time to work through this. I'd also appreciate if you reblogged, even if you don't have time to do the exercise.

When you think of an 'intersex body', what comes to mind?

-Do you think of a stereotypical "hermaphrodite"? (Ex. a penis + vagina, a penis + pair of breasts, a very feminine person with a beard)

Do you, or have you ever, used one of the following arguments;

-Intersex people are living proof that trans people exist/that gender/sex is not binary

-Intersex existing disproves everything TERFs/transphobes believe in

-Cis kids with hormone issues are allowed to take HRT or participate in sports, which is hypocritical against trans people

-Nobody is forcing kids into sex reassignment surgery or hormones, that isn't a thing that happens

-Any kind of argument which uses intersex people as a statistic, whether that is framing intersex people existing as either "common" or "rare"

Do you, or have you ever, said any of the following statements;

-Technically I'm biologically intersex now because I took HRT/had surgery, which makes me biologically nonbinary aka intersex

-I tell people that I am intersex/have a hormone condition to avoid discrimination

-I wish I was born as/could become intersex, it would help my dysphoria a lot

-Intersex people are so lucky because they're already biologically nonbinary, they don't even need to transition

-This animal was born with a mix of sex characteristics/without a sex/developed characteristics of the opposite sex over time, which means they're nonbinary/trans

When it comes to sex, do you;

-Believe that sex is binary

-Believe that all intersex people are infertile

-Believe that all intersex people produce both sperm and egg

-Fantasize about intersex bodies, or consume or create porn that displays either intersex bodies or exaggerated stereotypes of hermaphroditic bodies

-Ask invasive questions about what genitals or reproductive organs an intersex person has

-Treat AFAB/AMAB the same as "[non-medically-transitioned] perisex female/perisex male", such as saying "AFAB anatomy" when you really mean vulva, vagina, uterus, ovaries, breasts, and so on

-Believe that HRT/surgery makes you intersex

-Believe that intersex only covers certain types of variation in sex and not others (Ex. Counting ovotestes, CAIS, and CAH as intersex but not counting PCOS or Klinefelter's)

When it comes to creating (artwork, writing, videos, etc), do you;

-Wish to include an intersex character, but do little or no research on how to write/draw them

-Fail to consider how your work will affect real-life intersex people consuming your work

-Ask random intersex people to help you create an intersex character

-Wish to include an intersex character because you personally think intersex people are interesting, or because you are seeking to include as many marginalized identities as you can

-Create intersex characters because you personally find them sexy

-Refer to characters as "hermaphrodites"

-If you create pride artwork or sell pride artwork, if you include a large variety of other LGBT+ identities but do not include intersex, why is this?

When it comes to advocacy work, do you;

-Fail to bring up intersex issues in conversations which should directly involve them, such as the Kansas bathroom bill

-Attempt to push intersex people out of queer spaces by saying that they are not queer

-Fail to recognize or acknowledge how many anti-queer and anti-trans arguments are inherently also anti-intersex arguments

-Say that intersex people are just "collateral damage" or "just caught in the crossfire/targeted by mistake" when it comes to discussing discrimination

-Never think to bring intersex flags or pins or similar to pride even as an ally, contributing to pride being vastly void of intersex pride

-Never attempt to organize protests specifically for intersex rights, or never bring intersex issues up in LGBTQIA+ support groups or resource centers or online

-Never educate others on intersex issues or lift up intersex voices

-Believe that intersex people have more rights than other marginalized groups, or that they are not discriminated against for being intersex

-Believe that all intersex people who are discriminated against are only discriminated against because people believe that they are transgender

Now, not all of these will point towards you being intersexist; however, if you find yourself hitting several points listed here, you do likely have some internalized biases and intersexism to unpack.

[sickly-sapphic]

Decided to migrate my insta posts over to tumblr as well!! 🪻🌻 (I also have an intersex-focused discord server welcome to all - dm for link)

[ID:

Purple and yellow heart illusion background for all slides. Reads: Unpacking Your Intersexism

Step One: How You Imagine Intersex People

When you think of an intersex person, or an intersex body, what do you envision? Is it an assumption of their characteristics and anatomy? Does it group ALL intersex people into one tiny box?

Intersex people come in a variety of shapes, colours and genders. Some may look exactly like a woman or man, some may function one way but look the other, some are a mixed bowl. Stop creating a poster child for what an intersex person looks like!!

Step Two: How You Use Intersex People

Have you ever heard yourself say something like "intersex people are proof of nonbinary/trans peoples existance!" or "kids never get surgery/hormones!" or used the existance of intersex people to fight/disprove or otherwise argue with transphobes? Stop!

Intersex people are more then just a shield for your arguements. Intersex people are not "proof" that trans or nonbinary people exist, trans and nonbinary people are the proof they exist!! Not only are you failing to acknowledge intersex people as people, youre doing a disservice to trans and nonbinary people!!

Alongside this, medical abuse is a common trauma in the intersex community. Many people are forcibly sterilised, have surgeries performed on them as newborns, and are covertly given medications or hormones to "fix" their intersex characterstics as children and even into adulthood.

Step Three: How You Relate To Intersex People

Ever hear someone say something along the lines of "well I'm Technically intersex now that I've taken HRT", "intersex people are biologically nonbinary", "I want to transition into intersex" or "this animal with mixed/changing characterstics is trans!" ? These are common misconceptions.

Taking HRT does not make you "biologically intersex", it makes you someone taking HRT, in the same way that taking birth control doesn't mean you're now infertile. In the same way, you cannot transition into an intersex person. You may have ambiguous, androgynous or mixed transition goals - and that's completely fine! But intersex is not the term you're looking for (try altersex!)

Intersex people and animals are not "technically" or "biologically" nonbinary or transgender, they're intersex. While some intersex people may identify with the term nonbinary, or even consider themselves a cis nonbinary person, not every single intersex person is nonbinary, nor does every single way being intersex presents itself look like what you're percieving as a "biologically nonbinary" body.

Step Four: How You Treat Intersex People

Think to yourself - are you asking invasive questions (such as their variation or anatomy)? Are you including intersex people in your queer activism or art? Are you consuming intersexist media, or media that fetishises intersex bodies?

Intersex people NEVER owe you any information on their condition. You are not owed their anatomical features, their intersex variations, their hormone levels or their chromosomes. You should not be asking if they're infertile, whether they can have sex, or any other invasive question.

While not ALL intersex people identify with the queer community, many do. If you create queer art, merchandise or anything else created with queer symbols and flags - are you including intersex people? If not, why? Do you acknowledge how bills will affect intersex people, or do you call them collateral damage? Are you lifting up intersex voices, or pushing them out of queer spaces?

Step Five: (Mis)Using Intersexist Terminology

Do you use h*rmaphrodite to refer to intersex people? Do you identify with TME/TMA, or force it on others? Do you use AMAB or AFAB as a catchall to mean "people with a perisex, non-transitioned male body" and "people with a perisex, non-transitioned female body"?

Firstly, h*rmaphrodite is a slur used against intersex people All The Time. Some intersex people may self-identify with it, but it is Not what you should be calling intersex people, nor should other intersex people use it on those who don't identify with it.

TME and TMA, or transmisogyny exempt and transmisogyny affected, completely fail to acknowledge the existance of intersex people. The terms are meant to refer to "AMAB" nonbinary and transfeminine people (TMA), vs. "AFAB" nonbinary, transmasculine people, and cis people (TME). However, many intersex people may experience transmisogyny due to how they appear, such as intersex men with typically feminine characterstics or intersex women with typically masculine characterstics. Transmen, nonbinary people of all shapes, people of colour and gender non-conforming people may ALSO experience what some may call "misdirected transmisogyny" due to how they present, but that's a whole other story."

AMAB (assigned male at birth) and AFAB (assigned female at birth) are not catch-alls for typically male or typically female experiences. Some people who are AMAB have typically female anatomy, hormones or life experiences, some are going to need "female" healthcare. Some people who are AFAB have typically male anatomy, hormones or life experiences, some are going to need "male" healthcare. AMAB does not mean "person with a penis", AFAB does not mean "person with a vagina" nor does it mean "person with tits" or "person with a period/capable of pregnancy". When you are making your info post or your sex ed posts, use specific language. It's not AMAB, it's "people with testes", "people with erections". It's not AFAB, it's "people with ovaries", "people with periods", "people with tits" (I cannot stress enough how much AMAB people can have tits).

End ID]

[transmaverique]

amab and afab, if they were used as shorthand for the actual full phrases that they signify, with emphasis on the "assigned" part, and an understanding that they are enforcements of normative (ie, dyadic and cisgender and binary) sex, would be like. really useful. but people took the terms and started using them as shorthand FOR normative sex instead of the ENFORCEMENT OF normative sex. so when other trans people (almost always dyadic trans people) ask for your agab they are almost always asking for your Original Genital Situation. your starting point, so to say. and the reason FOR asking is also almost always bc they are trying to also enforce a certain kind of normativity within queer spaces (which is stupid bc being queer is inherently non-normative but here we are). like, you cant be a lesbian if you're ftm, bc you ARE m, so if you ARE a lesbian, then that means you're lying about some aspect of your identity. does that make sense?

it is always always always incredibly.... i do not trust dyadic trans people that use cagab terms, even moreso than i do not trust dyadic trans people that just use agab terms. agab is also coopted intersex language, but the "coercive" part of cagab SPECIFICALLY refers to medical "intervention" of intersex characteristics, such as "corrective" surgeries and hrt. i am deeply fucking suspicious of any dyadic trans person that uses those terms exactly the same as described above, even moreso if they do so bc "all gender is coercive".

like. yeah. that's true. but you use these terms to erase and overtake intersex discussions on the medical abuse of intersex infants. and i cant help but wonder why you would feel the need to do that.

[tirfpikachu]

you are not "detrans" you are cis

i'm definitely what you'd call cis too! though cis/bio womanhood is not at all what most tras assume it's like. especially detrans cis/bio womanhood. and for me, the label detrans helped me find others like me. it kept me from hating my own guts. it helped me find a community of ppl who actually understand what i've been through and don't think i'm a freak.

living as trans for 13 years changed what mainstream tras would call my gender identity forever. it also is a way for me to find people who also went thru what i went thru. i get a lot of DMs from other detrans women and detrans men who lived as trans or even transitioned partially/fully like me (i was on testosterone for a bit and have an awkward bit of annoying af stubble T_T gotta get expensive laser for that... it can be isolating!). to me, i will never again be a fully cis woman. i will forever be affected with having struggled with intense dysphoria for 13+ years. i also feel like my cis womanhood in general has forever been changed with me having rejected it and then finding it again - it does NOT feel the same way as my girlhood did. in girlhood, i didn't give a shit what people thought girls or boys needed to do. doubly so because i was autistic. then puberty came, and the usual teenage girl and/or afab experience of needing to conform to cispatriarchal expectations came, and i freaked the fuck out about my boobs, about how boys were suddenly treating me and the things my shitty female relatives told me were "becoming a woman" (all very conservative notions of womanhood) and it grossed me out so badly, on top of grappling with being into other afab people, and i just totally distanced myself from girlhood at all. i gave up on making my own scrungly, gender nonconforming version of girlhood. girlhood felt like it had no room for people like me.

and so i kicked it out of my mind. i obsessed over becoming a boy. some trans boys, ofc, become happily trans men. for me, though, it personally was an escape. i was trans-identified for all the wrong reasons and it really fucked me up. it made my internalized lesbophobia so much worse, to the point where i even started identifying as pansexual/bisexual (PREPOSTEROUS thing for me since i had never ever in my entire life been attracted to a man or someone living as male in society... but i was into non-transitioned transmasc people, so i thought i couldn't possibly be lesbian!). for me, the trans identity was a bandaid, it was a crutch in the worst possible way. detrans people aren't trying to make trans people look bad. we're not trying to convert y'all, we don't give a shit. we're too busy grappling with our newfound connection to cis womanhood/cis manhood and dealing with transition-related issues.

we NEED to find fellow detrans folks or we'll go batshit crazy with shame at having made a mistake, guilt at being weaponized without our consent against the trans community, and just fucking hating how hrt/surgeries affected our bodies and trying to come to terms with that and learning to love our bodies as they are despite it all.

detrans cis womanhood will never be normie cis womanhood.

detrans cis manhood will never be normie detrans manhood.

living as trans for years affects you DEEPLY. trans people should know this first-hand. detrans folks, simply by starting to live as cis / bio men/women again, cannot suddenly erase all those years as if they never existed. we just can't. i'm sorry. i tried. dear goddess i really fucking tried harder than you'll ever know. and so did so many of my detrans friends and my darling detrans girlfriend.

but detrans people need other detrans people.

mainstream tras don't understand us.

cis/bio radfems who aren't detrans often misrepresent us.

we need eachother.

and our voices NEED to be heard too.

both radfems AND mainstream tras don't get it.

detrans & desisted folks NEED sisterhood & siblinghood.

only detrans women understand other detrans women.

only detrans men understand other detrans men.

i will always be seeking out lost detrans sisters. and i will always want to hear out my detrans brothers. i love my detrans/desisted community. we've been through really hard shit, we're more likely to be gay, more likely to be traumatized, more likely to be autistic. we're not what you think. and now you need to sit down and hear our stories. sorry. it has to happen. or feel free to block all detrans voices and plug your ears and go lalala! and now i'm not talking to you specifically anon, i don't want to put assumptions in your little mouth. but i'm talking to ALL mainstream trans activists, anti-radfems especially, who assume the very worst of us from the get-go. those who want detrans & desisted people to pretend we were always cis and normies who should pretend to not be deeply affected by our real lived detrans/desisted experiences. we will not shut up. we refuse to. both radblr and normie leftblr misrepresent us.

our voices matter. or, at the very least, we deserve to put detrans/desisted in our bios so we can find one another. shoutout to my detrans & desisted siblings!!! i love you!!!! <33

[holopossums]

Here are some fun and important and fun things to know about Krow Jones from the Radiant Souls AU!

Krow is 18 years old, almost 19, during the events of the movie. His birthday is in early November and he meets Yukito in December, so both he and Yukito are 19 when they meet.

He is transmasc. While AFAB, sometime within his youth he decided he didn't feel like a girl and didn't want to be one. He started HRT when he was 14 and had top surgery when he was 17.

Krow is bisexual and attracted to many genders and species. But he does not know this until after he settles down in the present timeline and has time to think about things like that. Due to growing up surrounded by mutants and Yōkai, he doesn't find being attracted to non-humans weird in the slightest, and is in fact surprised when many humans say they aren't.

Personality-wise, Krow is compassionate, sweet, and endearingly sincere. He is serious when under stress, but when he relaxes he is quite goofy and playful. He is curious, loyal, and courageous. But he can be blunt and sarcastic. He has a temper and is prone to jealousy and wanting revenge. Though he tries to be fair, due to his high expectations of others he can sometimes be overly critical and hypocritical. But he always has his heart in the right place and tries his best to exert self-control, keep his flaws in-check, and maintain an air of maturity.

When he comes across new words or things he doesn't know, he tends to misremember or mispronounce the names in funny ways without meaning to. In roleplay, he's mispronounced charcuterie as "shark-cooch-tarry" or called the Guggenheim Museum as the "Google High".

While not knowledgeable about many things since he didn't have much of a formal education, he's clever and street-smart. He knows how to improvise and strategize, and he is good at solving puzzles. He's not great with comebacks most of the time, but he does like wordplay and puns. (He usually appreciates Ace's (Leo's) humor when no one else does.)

He is an extremely bad liar. So much so that it's painful to watch him lie. This is usually pretty humorous since he tends to behave anxiously whenever he lies and becomes a ball of sweat.

He is vulnerable in some ways. He wouldn't knowingly and willingly give information to an enemy or anything, and he doesn't purposely rat people out since he's very loyal to his family/friends/causes. But he's easily manipulated and his emotions are easily toyed with.

He is easily embarrassed or flustered in social situations. When he blushes, the tips of his ears go red and it soon spreads to his whole face. It is adorable.

Krow is very easy to tease. Because he never had a sibling growing up, he never quite caught onto the strategy of "don't give someone who's annoying you a reaction". He tends to react to everything and doesn't ignore those who annoy him. Characters who like to tease have a lot of fun around him.

More under cut!

The mask he wears was originally his mother's mask. After she died and he entered the war, it was modified for his use in battle by Jett (Donnie).

Jett wanted to make sure that Krow was going to be as protected as possible, so the tech inside the mask is meant to help him out as much as it can. It can do things like calculate trajectories and timing for him, so it's best for him to have his mask on while in battle or swinging with his grappling hook.

Krow wears his heart on his sleeve and has ever since he was little. He's very expressive; his facial expressions and tone of voice give away everything that he's feeling, and he has a lot of trouble with hiding it.

The Future turtles were concerned about Krow being so vulnerable, so when his mother died they encouraged him to keep and wear the mask when he feels scared, anxious, or sad. The mask acts as a security blanket for him and he hides his negative emotions with it. If he has it on him when he is feeling bad and wants to hide, he flips it down. He literally masks up to emotionally mask.

When Krow was young he was given various age-appropriate tasks to help around at the Base. Due to the large amount of things that needed to be done, he has broad skills and knowledge. He sort of became a jack-of-all-trades kid. As an older teen he's fairly self-sufficient and knows how to clean, cook, fix things, give first aid, and care for others.

Krow started training to fight when he was about 8 years old, some time after his mom died. Master Ace (Leo) thought it would be good for him and might also help him emotionally. Krow started out with basic Lou Jitsu-style martial arts. He was not allowed to use a bladed weapon until he was 12 and until that age was trained exclusively with wooden sticks, staffs, or any non-lethal blunt object.

Krow had a specific job in the war as a scout, messenger, and courier. It was his job to scout out areas and communicate with the Base and the other Resistance soldiers about what was going on so they could better strategize. He knows how to identify different types of Krang exosuits and ships from a distance and is good at investigation and patrolling. He was also often sent on missions to send messages or retrieve/deliver objects that were too important for regular drones to take care of. (Drones were often easily shot down or seized by the Krang whereas a person had a higher chance of success.) Later on in the war when the Resistance's numbers dwindled and he was older, Krow's role became less specialized and he was also fighting on the front lines a lot as a regular soldier.

He is farsighted. He can see things from a distance really well which was great for his job in the war, but he has trouble with seeing things up close. He needs reading glasses. No one noticed this because the majority of the reading Krow needed to do was mission notes and messages within his mask, so others couldn't really see him squinting. He also learned that he can read better up close if he relaxes his eyes/goes cross-eyed for a moment then refocuses.

Krow, like a crow, is a scavenger and loves to pick up random objects off the ground that catch his eye. He's drawn to things that are colorful and shiny - cool rocks, flowers, glass shards, coins, trash, trinkets, anything really. (This guy would go ham in a gift shop, do not bring him into one unless you're willing to spend hours in there.) When not on duty, he fills his pockets and bag with the things he finds. He amasses collections of things that he likes and stashes them away in secret spots.

Little things bring him a lot of joy and he tends to assume it brings other people the same amount of joy. Because of this, if he likes someone then he is going to give them the random things he finds as gifts, regardless of whether or not they actually want these things. Gift-giving is one of his expressions of love. The better he knows someone the more thoughtful he might be about it - for example, he might give someone things that are their favorite color.

He always wants to feel helpful in some way and feels anxious when he can't help. He tends to serve others before himself and act as support. If he can't do much, you'll often find him doing menial tasks or manual labor. This makes him a wonderful carer when people around him are ill or injured. He's also great at getting chores done.

He is certainly his mother's son: he has so much undiagnosed ADHD. It's just expressed differently than his mother. He's not spontaneously loud and brash like her, but he certainly cannot sit still for long periods of time and always needs to be on the move. He's often pacing around or fidgeting, and he's very expressive with his hand motions and gestures. He's also quite mentally restless, especially when stressed, and tends to overthink.

Because of his restlessness and curiosity, some of his favorite things to do are simply wandering around and people watching. This makes daily life in present-day NYC immensely interesting to him. He doesn't like crowds so he'll often be on the top of buildings and watch activities from afar. This behavior leads into his life as a vigilante slightly later on, as he tends to catch a lot of crime when he's watching from up high. He's like a heroic crow carefully watching the scene before swooping in to help others and swiftly deliver justice.

Krow is highly adaptable, so given time he learns and adjusts fairly well to life in the present timeline. He is, however, an older teen who wants to be independent and does not want to feel like a burden, so he's itching to figure out how to make it on his own. He's past high school age and has no interest in school, nor is he confident that he could do well in it. A year or so after he's been in the present, he starts to look for jobs and apartments.

Present Jett forged documents for Krow so he could get a job, and Present Angel (April) helped him with other job things like interviews. Krow's first few jobs were in things like retail and fast food, which he could not stand and wouldn't be at them for very long. He's not socialized to believe the customer (or boss) is always right. He can be quite blunt or have a temper and speaks his mind about what he believes is right, so he's very fire-able despite any other good work he does.

Krow eventually lands a day job that he tolerates and comes to enjoy, which is being an ice technician and groundskeeper for a local ice rink. It's there that he learns that he loves ice skating and ice hockey, because he often watches games and competitions. (It's a little funny that he has to work in slightly chilly conditions considering he hates the cold, so he's often bundled up for work.)

By the time he is in his late 20s to 30s, he's far more emotionally/mentally stable and has matured. He seems to have mellowed out a lot, and he channels a lot of his anger and any resentment into his fighting and vigilante work. He kind of leans more into being edgy when he's older because he uses this edgy persona to be intimidating. (And he is still a bit edgy on the inside.) But he's still the same lovable dork too.

I could probably go on and on about this guy but I'll stop here for everyone's sake. But there ya go! Lots of info about him.

[transgenderpolls]

I also want to say this as a transmasculine nonbinary person that I’ve seen a LOT of trans men be uncomfortable with the term being universalised to include them. Transmasculine started out as a nonbinary label (I think, I could be mixed up) that described enben who were transitioning to a more masculine point instead of a neutral one. Obviously trans men can use transmasculine if they feel like it fits, but still I think it’s best to not just lump us together with the label because there are so many trans men who aren’t comfortable with it (I’ve actually seen a lot of people saying that it straight up makes them dysphoric because they take it as being seen as less of a man)

Same goes for non-transmasculine afab nonbinary people— there’s actually a lot of people calling to just get rid of the terms because they see it as just an indicator of agab. I’ve actually encountered more transneutral afab enben who hate being called transmasculine than I have trans men who hate it. It makes sense, the entire point for transneutral enben is transitioning to some sort of complete middle, or outside of gender alltogether, and aligning them with a specific gender is not only just incorrect but also very uncomfortable and dysphoria inducing for a lot of them. A lot of people also really don’t like the idea of t being ‘transmasculine transition’, which I totally get because I feel the same way when someone says that t is inherently ‘male transition’

(btw this is all stuff I’ve heard from these groups, I’m not just saying what I think goes through their heads or anything)

On a personal note, I also don’t like the universalisation of it because it feels like aligned enben can’t really have a term to describe ourselves— like, being a transmasc or transfem nonbinary person is a very complicated experience, most of us really struggle with this sort of balancing act of androgyny and maleness/femaleness, we’re like an in-beteeen of an in-between and it’s really fucking hard to deal with. It would just be nice if we could have our own label and space to discuss it and help each other with it. But I also get that now a lot of trans men resonate with the term and it would very much be a dick move to just say ‘nope, you can’t use this anymore, fuck you lol’, like, no

idk, I think about this a lot and the topic comes up quite frequently so I have a lot to say on it, but I can’t exactly articulate it, so I hope this made sense sorry

if anyone has sources to show otherwise i'd be happy to see them but i've always been under the impression that "transmasc(uline)" and "transfem(inine)" were umbrella terms first and foremost, with origins in the world of medical transitioning, particularly HRT, that sought specifically to include non-binary people and therefore not imply that everyone going through [medical] masculinization or feminization necessarily identifies as a man or a woman. whether the end goal is conceptualized by the individual as a masc/fem role, it's just a matter of having useful, succinct language to describe shared experience. i really don't see it as denoting agab any more than the term "trans man/woman" does. like if you really are not comfortable denoting your agab at all, it sounds like you're not comfortable talking about being trans period.

as for the binary trans men who hate it i'm gonna be real, i cannot comprehend being mad about someone using an umbrella term simply to address you and others who have significant things in common with you in one breath. i'm a binary trans man and i won't lie, i have had my phase of whining about being "lumped in with non binary people," but like... that's what it was. it was a phase that i'm over because i've grown up and now realize that it doesn't actually dilute my identity to simply have things in common with other people. it would be like a square being mad about being called a rectangle because "you're erasing the fact that i am SPECIFICALLY a square!" literally no, no one is erasing anything. especially not in the context of a poll that's just trying to not draw really arbitrary lines, and which you also literally don't have to answer.

i think it's completely valid to be made dysphoric or uncomfortable by any terminology, but there's a point at which you kind of have to accept that that is a you thing? if a term's literal function is to be inclusive and you feel excluded somehow bc you don't like that you're not being acknowledged as fundamentally different than the others who that term applies to... like i'm sorry, that's kind of ridiculous. you have to accept that it's ridiculous and not anyone else's problem.

also i truly think that if it's coming to contentions such as "just because i'm a man doesn't mean i'm masculine" or ppl otherwise trying to draw hard lines between masc and man/male as definitions... i truly think you are just trying to make this more complicated than it is. like we do need words to describe things, lol.

in any case my thing - at least on this blog - is always gonna be in the context of making polls. firstly i'm working with a character and option limit. secondly, the questions being asked make it sometimes relevant to use some terms that lump groups together, denote agab, etc. the more i think about it, i don't think there's going to be a solution that satisfies everyone, and i also don't think that there's a huge problem with that.

(btw none of this is directed at anon, you articulated yourself fine, i'm just jumping off of your talking points)

edit: irt anon not liking the universalization of "transmasc" - it just occurred to me, would "transmasc nonbinary" not simply work? like it seems to me that you just need to add the word nonbinary and now you're gucci

[justcantquinn]

"lesbian isn't non-men attracted to non-men, it's women attracted to women"

saw this take earlier. of all the gatekeeping bullshit...

okay, let's play a super quick game:

you're a lesbian. you watch a movie starring janelle monae. you fall in love with her. she's so beautiful, so talented. you're attracted to her physically and attracted to her personality.

then you find out janelle monae is non-binary.

uh oh! are you no longer a lesbian?

"well, once i found out she isn't a woman, i would no longer be attracted to her!"

really? are you sure?

"it's about her gender. i might find her attractive in other ways, but i wouldn't find her attractive overall because of her gender."

really?

okay, well, let's say you find her physically attractive still but aren't attracted overall because of her gender. fair enough, right?

then are women who are physically attracted to men but don't romantically or sexually pursue men still lesbians? a little bit of chest hair action gets 'em hot and heavy, but they'd never pursue that.

no? yes? why does this standard apply to non-binary people but not men?

if "yes," let's also assume a woman HAS slept with men in the past. or dated them! and still finds them physically attractive, but just not attractive overall because of their gender. is she a lesbian?

are you really going to sit here and tell me that if a lesbian woman had a partner for ten or twenty years who suddenly started using she/they pronouns that she's no longer a lesbian, even if she and her partner still use that label for themselves?

can the partner still call themselves a lesbian? would you dare to challenge them on that? really?

if no, if the partner can still call themselves a lesbian in this scenario, then what's the difference between this non-binary person calling themselves a lesbian and any other non-binary person calling themselves a lesbian? is it because this other non-binary person is amab and presents masc? hmm? what if they were afab and presented masc? what if they were afab, presented masc, and were on hrt? what if they were amab, presented masc, but were on feminizing hrt? it kinda feels like maybe you don't ACTUALLY think non-binary people are actually non-binary...

disallowing women attracted to non-binary people from calling themselves lesbian is a slippery slope that ends in transphobia, sex essentialism, and the erasing on non-binary identities.

disallowing non-binary people from calling themselves lesbian is the same slippery slope.

"that's because non-binary people aren't real! being trans is fake! etc."

firstly, ew. secondly...

you're a lesbian. you see a woman across the bar. she's gorgeous. drop dead. you take her home. you spend the night together. you begin seeing each other.

you find out a few weeks later that she's trans. post surgery, post hrt.

are you no longer a lesbian for being sexually attracted to her? are you no longer a lesbian for being emotionally attracted to her?

you meet a woman. she's with her husband. big, burly, bearded dude. absolute hunk of a man.

she calls herself a lesbian.

'what? huh? no you're not. you're married to a man.'

'yeah, but he's a TRANS man. so. yk.'

is she a lesbian? the only other people she's ever slept with have been women.

stop trying to over-define the term. stop trying to box people in. if people want to identify with the community, let them. seriously. just let them. we'll deal with the people using the label in bad faith as they come up.

"but i want a place to feel safe! i want a place full of people who are going to identify with me and relate to me! i want a community of people who face the same problems as i do!"

yeah. we all do. we do. all the people you're trying to keep out certainly do. but even if we do restrict membership to people who fit your criteria, they're not all gonna experience the same stuff as you. you're gonna run into gold star lesbians and lesbians who had only dated men prior to coming out. you're gonna meet asexual lesbians, demisexual lesbians, hypersexual lesbians. you're gonna meet drag kings and high femmes. you're gonna meet girls who pass as straight, maybe are even still in the closet, and girls who came out of the closet at five and are so butch they pass as a guy without even trying. you're gonna meet lesbians with so much trauma around being queer they can barely make it through the day and lesbians who had the good fortune to barely, if ever, face any oppression. there's always gonna be people in our community whose experiences feel alien to you. there's always gonna be people who you don't share much common ground with at all. there's always gonna be people who don't fit in with your idea of the culture. there's always gonna be people who make you feel uncomfortable, unsafe.

the queer community is not invite only. our labels don't and can't have rigid definitions. gender is a spectrum and where we lie on that spectrum may change. sexuality is a spectrum and where we lie on that spectrum may change. we're always going to be in motion, even if you don't want to be. even if that idea scares you.

you do have a community. you do have safe people and safe spaces. there are people who get you. just relax. you're going to be okay.

[windwardstar]

So like the whole "they don't put any effort into presenting not-femme and are still femme presenting so I'm just going to treat them as a woman still and not take their identity seriously" has always just been an excuse to misgender people and dismiss the trans identities of people who don't perform gender to the person's standards.

And it's always couched in terms of "not bothering" to bind or dress masculinely or have long hair or continue to wear makeup and who "aren't able" to access hrt or surgeries or whatever. Because it gives the person plausible deniability to say "I'm not talking about those trans people who are really trans and just can't meet my new gender performing standards for legitimate reasons, I'm talking about those fake trans who just say they're trans but don't actually put in any effort"

And like. You have no way of knowing who is in the closet and unable to transition for safety, who is not able to access resources for medical transition, who is comfortable with their current appearance and has no desire to pursue surgeries or hrt or change anything about themselves as part of their transition. There is no way of knowing just from looking at someone whether or not they meet your criteria in order to take their identity seriously.

And also like. The further I get in my transition and the more things I'm able to access the more it's like... I've had top surgery. I'm on T. I've had short hair. I've dressed in men's clothes. And I've been gendered as female 100% of the time throughout everything. Because despite all that my face still reads as feminine and my voice despite dropping still reads as feminine. My hair is currently in a femme style. And I don't care to change those things because with all the other ways I've been able to transition I'm comfortable in my body and they don't cause me dysphoria. But they're enough to make me "present femme" in a way that doesn't make cis people pause before assuming I'm a woman, and any of the ways I have been able to masculinize my body get registered and then dismissed as things I've actively cultivated and instead get me read as transfemme by other trans people. Because apparently in order to not assumed to be a girl I have to remove every trace of anything feminine from my existence.

And then it's also like. The expectation of performing non-femininity of performing masculinity or degendering androgyny to the appropriate standards in order to have your identity respected is just like. If you're just existing in your body, just throwing on jeans and a t shirt and letting yourself exist as is, is like how is that presenting "femininely"??? just because you're afab and existing is not inherently "presenting feminine". And like when you couple that with not binding...which uh it can be choice but also like... binding is the active choice here where you have to get a binder and put on the binder and choose to use the binder. Again there's no way of looking at someone and being able to tell if they're not binding because they can't due to medical or financial or safety reasons or just due to personal choice. And so the idea that not binding is presenting as inherently feminine is just. Not binding is the default existence of the body and shouldn't be gendered as a presentation choice + nobody should be required to change anything about themselves in order to have their identity respected.

...anyway I have a bunch of thoughts about existing as a trans masc enby and being read as feminine and being misgendered. Hope some of the train of thought ramble vent rant made sense.

[ipso-faculty]

I just wanted to ask for clarification on the redefinition of the term mesosex, am I correct in assuming that it no longer describes me? I'm someone who had started identifying with the term due to being part of the "group 8" that you described in your original discussion as being the intended audience:

Not seen as intersex by intersex people: PMDD, endometriosis, and other reproductive disorders, who may relate to the intersex experience anyway. Reading asks that @queercripintersex got from people in this category was what gave me the seed of the idea for mesosex.

More specifically, I have endometriosis which seems to be related to low progesterone, and now that I'm on progesterone HRT to treat my endo I'm having the weird experience of undergoing hormonal feminization (breast growth, fat redistribution, etc) for the first time at the age of 25. So I'm technically perisex, but it feels kinda weird calling myself that when I'm an afab person on feminizing HRT that's making me go through the same physical changes my transfem friends are going through 😅 I also feel that I identify with some of the experiences I've heard from intersex people about social ostracization due to not fitting in with society's ideas about sex and gender. I was treated differently as a teenager by some people due to not "looking like" a girl for one, and personally I also feel alienated when people (primarily transphobes tbh) talk about how a universal and important experience of growing up as a girl is that after you go through puberty strangers start sexualizing you, because I... never experienced that. My body just didn't develop that way (not that I'm complaining, but you know)

I just wanted to make sure like... should I stop using the term? I thought I had found something that described my experiences, but if I no longer fit the definition then I don't want to be like disrespectful or anything

Hi! Thank you for the ask! 🩵

So my first reaction on glancing at your ask was "maybe there should be a term for the group 8 people". 🤔

But then I sat down and properly read your ask, and... I'm not actually sure you're group 8? 🤔 My personal conviction is that an AFAB with chronically low progesterone to an extent that it would have had noticeable effects on pubertal development & social development is intersex in the same ways that somebody with chronically low estrogen is considered intersex.

Hypogonadism is in InterAct's list of variations, and I don't see how hypoprogesteronism wouldn't be be a kind of hypogonadism. 🧐 Wikipedia includes low progesterone in their page on hypogonadism. Here's how InterAct defines it:

Similarly, MOGAI wiki defines hypogonadism as intersex and explicitly mentions low progesterone. But I can see somebody dismissing MOGAI wiki as being on the more radical side of things.

So for the most conservative/intermedicalist takes within the pan-intersex community I look to what ISNA has on their website. And they list hypogonadotrophic hypogonadism as an intersex variation - i.e. hypogonadism wherein you don't have a complete puberty, which it sounds like could be the case for you?

So to me I think you're actually in group 5? 😅 So the redefinition of mesosex is still scoped in a way that (as far as I'm concerned) would still include you. 🤠

But if I've misunderstood your case and you don't think hypogonadism applies, perhaps there is a need to create a word for what I had dubbed group 8 (people with reproductive disorders that identify with intersex people but whom are not generally accepted as intersex by the intersex community). Maybe juxtasex could be repurposed for this since it never really got taken up as a term for non-intersex? Or a new word entirely? 🤔

Though honestly I don't know how big the demand is. NGL: every time I've interacted with somebody with PMDD/endometriosis who identifies with intersex people, once they start explaining why, I get the distinct impression they have an intersex variation that has been underexplored. 🤷 I kinda suspect that the PMDD/endometriosis people who aren't sure if they're intersex would be served by the already existing term "extersex". 👀

IDK, let me know what you think! Happy to think about coining new terms. 🤓

[intersex-questions]

it's really stressful for me ask and i feel weird. if it's possible, tell if my words are intersexist. also i will use vague terms or censorship sometimes, because some words are extremely uncomfortable for me (but it's not because i see them as slurs or bad words overall).

CWs: gender dysphoria, AGAB terms, intersexism (?), went (?), long post

i have a pcos. (or... i have had pcos?)

and... it's both dysphoric and not.

i feel like the word "intersex" is really me, but i feel guilty using it. like i'm not intersex enough. like i'm not intersex at all. like i'm stealing something from actually intersex people.

also my condition reminds me that is so-called "AFAB" intersex variation. and i feel extremely dysphoric people knowing i am so-called "AFAB". i hate people knowing about some of my traits that are connected with it. i hate mentioning what i was like when i was born. i hate "AGAB" terms overall. i hate i can't use AIAB (not because of someone, but because of moral block of some kind).

i've started to treat some of my uh... "painful results" of having pcos, but it increase some of my traits i consider dysphoric. so now i'm in the middle of nowhere. (oh my god it is so vague, i'm sorry)

and for some reason... posts like "trans-intersex people will never be intersex, you will always be p_____x/d____c, you was born not intersex" make me want to cry. i might even say... it is triggering me. calling myself d____c or p____ex feels painful.

and it feels so bad. i know intersex people have a right to say it. and non-intersex people should know these boundaries. but at the same time... i can't really engage with intersex related posts safely. (i feel like i'm trying to silence you right now.)

in the end, i can't use "intersex" towards myself now due to my... guilt. and i can't use p___sex or dy___c either, because I'd rather die. i can't even call myself "questioning". because i know i have (or i had? if i'm not on meds now?) pcos. i can't use "altersex" because i see too many (useful and needed in fact) posts about difference between altersex and intersex.

i'm sorry.

Hi there,

You have nothing to be sorry for. I hear your pain and I am sorry (sympathy) that you have had to endure all of this. That is awful and no one should have to deal with that.

There are a few things I'd like to say. First, my primary perspective is that you are intersex, no matter what. PCOS is an inherently intersex condition in mine and many other intersex people's beliefs. This is an inclusionist perspective intersex blog, so keep in mind that yes, there are more exclusionary intersex people who will disagree. But you will also find many, many intersex people view PCOS as inherently intersex. And, especially in the ways you describe, it seems like it definitely affects you in a way that is relevant to being intersex.

It is really hard sometimes to work through that guilt. I know when I first started using the term intersex and realizing I was, I felt like I was faking it. I felt like I was taking a term from a community I wasn't part of and that I was just desperate to feel included or be part of something or check off a "diversity" point and many other sentiments that can from internalized homophobia (as in the whole community) and internalized intersexism.

I know that personally, I also have really struggled because going on HRT for trans+ reasons has made many of my intersex traits seem like something that's just "normal" because they kind of blend in with typical results from the HRT I'm on. But that doesn't erase the experiences I've had my whole life. That doesn't erase how my body naturally is. I don't owe anything to anyone else about my body. I do not owe justifications, reasonings, or explanations as to why I am intersex. It is no one else's business how I am intersex other than my own.

If people ever ask you how or why you're intersex, you do not know them that explanation. Even if they are intersex themselves. To me, it is akin to asking a trans person if they're on HRT, what surgeries they've had, etc. It's a personal invasive question that's not their business unless you want to share with them.

Trans intersex people are just as intersex as cisgender intersex people, and honestly, those kinds of sentiments are deeply confusing as part of the point of the intersex community and definition of it is to break down binaries and rigid boxes like sex, rather than reinforce them by reinforcing something like being cisgender or transgender. Intersex people do NOT have a right to be transphobic just because they are intersex. They do NOT have a right to be exclusionary and gatekeeping just because they are intersex.

PCOS in itself is a condition that can't be cured. Even if you showed no symptoms of it, you would still have PCOS. And even if somehow you WERE cured, it would not erase the experiences you had had with it before. You would still have lived an intersex life. Someone with hyperandrogenism going on testosterone for trans+ reasons does not erase their lived experience they had before going on testosterone.

I hope I managed to cover and address most of what you sent in. I wish you the best and again, I'm so sorry you've had to endure that all. You are absolutely welcome in the intersex community and you are completely allowed to use the intersex label. You are also allowed to use altersex if you want! They are not mutually exclusive. I identify as both intersex and altersex personally.

[soaplantro]

(i was gonna comment this on your exorsexism post but the comment got too long lol)

i think the word itself hasn't caught on much yet but i do genuinely believe that it's a real form of oppression separate from transmisogyny, like there's a very clear difference between how you're treated if you're a trans woman vs a transfem non-binary person (and same goes for trans man vs transmasc non-binary person)

and like, there's also a very clear difference between how you're treated if you're a cis woman vs a non-transmasc non-binary person who was afab (idk the best way to word this, but hopefully you get what i mean)

on top of that, there's definitely a difference between how you're treated if you're a non-transmasc non-binary person who was afab vs a transfem non-binary person, that's the difference between being tme and tma

so when you experience both transmisogyny and exorsexism it may be hard to separate them both, but society does place transfem enbies (at least slightly) below trans women, like how society places non-transmasc enbies afab below cis women (while not putting them in the same category as trans men)

think about how like, many transfems have to hide the "non-binary" parts of themselves just to be taken seriously by society, many enbies have to basically misgender themselves in places like healthcare just to get stuff like hrt and surgeries, and there have been so many cases of medical professionals denying (openly) non-binary people care because they basically admit that they straight up just don't treat non-binary trans people (while still accepting and treating binary trans people)

and many binary trans people do actually weaponise the little privilege they have against non-binary trans people, like with the whole "i'm a normal trans, not like those they/thems" thing that certain trans people love to pull, and even cis people admit this "i accept trans people as long as they fit into my image of what a perfect trans person is like" which almost never includes non-binary people ever

and there's just the fact that "non-binary" just doesn't even exist in most people's heads, people only ever use "they" when they want to degender you, but the moment your pronounds are actually they/them they'll either always misgender you as he/him or she/her, and if you're transfem and you don't use she/her at all, people will just use that as an excuse to call you he/him instead (when they're perfectly fine not using he/him for binary trans women, this is something i've seen happen myself) or just use she/her and make you feel guilty for being uncomfortable with it (this is something all enbies who are misgendered as she/her experience, but if you're tma it's definitely worse)

in fact, even if you align more with womanhood while still being non-binary (and using she/they or they/she for example) you can experience this.. i knew a transfem who used she/they pronounds but only ever said her pronounds are she/her to certain people because (in their exact words):

"i relate more to demigirls than cis women but tell that to cis people when talking about being transgender they just load the ammo you give them"

and also:

"im she/they and have been a demigirl forever, but a lot of times my cis girl friends will make uncomfortable overly binary comments about my body" "and I don't say anything because they're seeing me as a girl but it's uncomfortable"

i think that's a perfect example of what it's like to experience both transmisogyny and exorsexism at the same time.. society places such strict standards of femininity on tma people that even showing a hint of being non-binary is frowned upon, this is something non-binary people who were afab experience too, but being tma makes it worse!

that isn't to say that binary trans people aren't hurt by this at all, these strict standards of femininity also hurt trans women, but the way it targets and isolates transfem enbies specifically (and forces them into the closet in places where trans women can be open about their gender) makes it exorsexist too, at least imo it does

Interesting! Thanks for your input.

[pride-database]

Transgender umbrella.

Transgender flag, by Monica Helms:

The baby blue stripes were chosen because it is the traditional colour for boys, while the pink is for girls. The white stripe symbolises those who are intersex, transitioning, or see their gender as neutral or undefined.

This flag was deliberately made to be symmetrical, so no matter which way you fly it, it's always correct. This, according to the author, is a metaphor for trans people finding correctness in their lives.

Meaning of Transgender:

Someone who doesn't identify solely, completely, and always as the gender they were assigned at birth.

Trans- is a Latin root which translates to "across".

What does "gender assigned at birth" mean?

When a baby is born, the doctors declare "it's a boy" or "it's a girl" based on their genitals. This means assigning a gender identity that others will classify them as, based on their sex.

If they have a vagina and ovaries, they're assigned/designated female at birth (AFAB/DFAB), while if they have a penis and tesicles, they're assigned/designated male at birth (AMAB/DMAB).

Very rarely, and only in certain cultures, if a child's genitals are ambiguous they may instead be assigned indeterminate/intersex at birth (AIAB/AXAB) (More on intersex in a different post).

Useful terminology:

Sex: the combination of physical elements (genitals, reproductive organs, chromosomes, hormones etc.) that classify someone as female, male, or intersex.

Gender: the social, psychological, cultural, and behavioural categories of woman/girl, man/boy, or non-binary person, which carry their own behavioural expectations (gender roles).

Cisgender: the opposite of transgender; someone who identifies with the gender they were assigned at birth. Shortened to "cis".

Trans woman/girl: someone who identifies as a woman despite not having been assigned female at birth. Women who have been assigned male at birth may refer to themselves as MTF (male-to-female).

Cis woman/girl: someone who identifies as a woman and has been assigned female at birth.

Trans man/boy: someone who identifies as a man despite not having been assigned male at birth. Men who have been assigned female at birth may refer to themselves as FTM (female-to-male).

Cis man/boy: someone who identifies as a man and has been assigned male at birth.

Note: there should always be a space between the adjective "trans" and the noun it accompanies; it is not written as "transwoman/transman". Trans is just a descriptive word, and when someone's trans status is not relevant, you should just refer to them as a woman/a man.

Non-binary: anyone whose gender identity doesn't fit within the binary of man–woman. It fits under the transgender umbrella because non-binary people don't identify fully, constantly, or solely as the gender they were assigned at birth, although some non-binary people may not find the term transgender useful to them. (I'll get into more detail on non-binary in the next post.)

Transition: the act of changing one's appearance, name, and/or pronouns to express one's trans gender identity.

There are 2 types of transition:

Social transition: the act of going by a different name, different pronouns, and/or a different gender presentation.

Medical transition: going on puberty blockers, hormone replacement therapy (HRT) and/or having gender affirming surgeries/sex reassignment surgeries (GAS/SRS).

Gender dysphoria: a feeling of distress around the gendered parts of one's body and/or the gender one is socialized as, that can lead to mental issues like depression if left untreated.

Attempts to treat it with conversion therapy have been unsuccessful and are extremely harmful; the cure for dysphoria is transition.

Types of dysphoria:

Body dysphoria: distress over one's primary (genitals) and secondary (voice, hairs, height etc.) sex characteristics not matching one's gender identity. This type of dysphoria is best treated with medical transition.

Social dysphoria: distress over being gendered incorrectly (this act is called misgendering), being called the wrong name (deadnaming), and just generally being seen as a gender one doesn't identify as. This type of dysphoria is best treated with other people respecting the individual's pronouns and calling them their chosen name, even if it's hard to get used to.

Mental dysphoria: distress over one's internal reactions not matching the reactions of the gender one identifies as.

Not all trans people have all 3 types; in fact, some trans people may not even have any type of significant dysphoria.

Gender expression: the way someone dresses to express their gender.

Crossdresser/Transvestite: someone whose gender expression doesn't match the expectations for their gender identity. For example, someone who identifies as a man but likes to dress femininely (regardless of whether he's a trans man or a cis man). Transvestite is an outdated term used to medicalize such people, so it is best to just refer them as crossdressers, unless they have reclaimed the term.

Slur ahead!

Tranny: an offensive term used to degrade trans people. Has been reclaimed by some trans people, but absolutely do not use it on a trans person unless they specifically ask you to.

Subsets of trans:

Transfeminine | Transmasculine

Transneutral | Transandrogynous (colour-adjusted cause the original's dark grey stripe was a slightly different shade)*

These terms indicate the "direction" of one's transition:

Transfeminine (shortened to transfem): transitioning towards a more feminine gender.

Transmasculine (shortened to transmasc): transitioning towards a more masculine gender.

Trans women are transfeminine, and trans men are transmasculine, but these words' meanings are not limited to these two: non-binary people can also be transmasc or transfem. Others however prefer different terms to describe their transition:

Transneutral (shortened to transneu): transitioning towards a more neutral gender.

Transandrogynous (shortened to transangi): transitioning towards a more androgynous gender.

Difference between gender-neutral and androgynous:

Although often used interchangeably, technically gender-neutral refers to something that is neither masculine nor feminine, while androgynous means it is both masculine and feminine (andro is a greek root for "male/man/masculine", and gyno for "female/woman/feminine").

This is reflected in the flag colour choices, since purple is a combination of pink and blue, while yellow is completely separate from them.

Things you should know about trans people:

Trans people aren't mentally ill. Yes, gender dysphoria is still listed in the DSM-V, but it is no longer considered a disorder; the diagnosis still exists to make it easier to access the medical means for transition.

"Rapid-onset gender dysphoria" is just a myth; no amount of outside influence can turn someone trans.

The amount of people who regret transitioning has been shown by multiple researches to be extremely low; for example, an US survey of 27,715 trans people found that of the 8% of people who revert their social and medical transition (detransitioners)—and of which 62% end up retransitioning—only 5% did so because they realized transition wasn't right for them. That's 0.04% of all people who were surveyed. The rest detransitioned due to financial, medical, and discrimination issues, and especially due to pressure from loved ones. It is especially uncommon to detransition after a gender-affirming surgery.

Being trans is not a sexual perversion. Why would anyone willingly subject themselves to all the discrimination trans people face every day—even risk being arrested or killed in some places—just to live out a sexual fantasy?

"Trans" vs "Transgender" vs "Transsexual":

"Trans" can be short for either "transgender" or "transsexual".

Transsexual is an older, mostly outdated term for trans people: it refers to those who transition medically and surgically. It's disrespectful to refer to a trans person as transsexual if they don't specifically tell you the term they identify with. This is because it's been used to medicalize trans people, and additionally not all trans people want or are able to undergo sex reassignment surgery.

Transgender by comparison is a more neutral term, and refers to any trans person regardless of whether they intend to undergo medical transition or not. (When in doubt, just use trans!)

Some info on HRT:

Hormone Replacement Therapy consists of injections/gel/pills/patches of Testosterone (T)—the dominant male hormone—for transmascs, and Estrogen (E)—the dominant female hormone—along with anti-androgens, for transfems. These enact a "second puberty" of sorts e.g. a voice drop and facial hair growth for people who go on T, and breast growth for people who go on E.

If a trans kid hasn't started their puberty yet, and wants to delay it to decide if they want to undergo a different kind of puberty instead when they turn 16, they may be prescribed puberty blockers instead. These are reversible, meaning that if you stop taking them, you'll undergo a typical puberty for your sex.

HRT and puberty blockers aren't any more dangerous than any other medication: they've been used on cis people for longer than they've been used on trans people, for example puberty blockers for kids who have their puberty too early, or T for women who bodybuild.

*here's the original transandrogynous flag, if anyone wants it:

Whew; sorry for the wordiness of this one! I hope all trans people are living their best life! See you in the next post 🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️

[moongothic]

What do you think about the cover with Yamato and the girls? Or Yamato wearing a traditional women outfit?

I was kind of upset. Oda gave us an amazing chapter with Kiku and Yamato using the bathroom that align with their identity then drew this cover??? Its so hard to trust Oda when he acts like that.

My problem with Oda is that he kind of lumps all non-cishetnormative people into the same box without understanding the difference between different types of people. Which, to be fair, is a common issue especially with older people outside the queer community (and in Japan especially from what I understand??)

And if I'm being honest, I'm still not entirely sure Yamato is actually meant to be trans. Part of me still wonders if he might just be meant to be a gender non-conforming cis woman who prefers masc terminology. (Which would be valid, mind you)

But then there was the bathhouse scene and yeah it's hard to imagine Yamato genuinely identifying as a woman and then going into the mens bath. Also women don't wish they were born male.

And then I was like, huh, maybe he IS meant to be actually trans

But then there's all the meta information about Yamato like him being called Kaidou's "daughter" in those trivia books and getting classified as "female" and it's like????????????

Now let's be real, trans and queer rep in Japanese media tends to very heavily favor AMAB queer people, to the point that AFAB queer people tend to be completely forgotten. Like people literally don't know we exist. Some people really are so fucking dense they can not wrap their head around the idea of an FtM trans person at all

So there's a part of me that wonders if all these things, Yamato being classified as "female" and getting included with the girls in that colorspread, were not in an effort to misgender him, but to help clarify to those dense motherfuckers that yes, Yamato is an AFAB queer person, not AMAB???

I dunno man, I have Complicated Feelings about Yamato. Like I love him to pieces and would take a bullet for him but the way he's been characterized and treated so far makes me feel like

I'm positive we're going to see Yamato again (since we know Pluton is in Wano etc), and I'm fucking certain I'm gonna see Iva-chan meet with the Strawhats again. It's entirely plausible the two could meet in the future, and if they do, Yamato could be offered some HRT. And regardless of if he took up the offer or not that would without a doubt end the fucking conversation and any potential confusion about him. And if nothing else my blood pressure would appreciate it.

[not-poignant]

This is the anon the said 'safe'. Your tags hit me hard, since I'm actually starting a transition but am avoiding hrt. I've been getting pushback on it, and been told I'm not really trans without it. I know what I want to change to feel like myself. Also what I don't want to change. That's probably why 'safe' was my choice. It sucks when you think you should belong, but still feel like you aren't good enough. It helped to hear you have felt the same. I just want to give you a big virtual hug.

Ahhh I have a similar story, anon <333 I'm so sorry you went through it too.

Under a read more because it contains transphobia towards a nonbinary person from a binary trans person. My experiences are from a nonbinary lens, anon, so take the bits that are useful to you and ignore the rest, depending on where you sit on the trans spectrum <333

When I started realising I was transmasc (I'd known I was non-binary for a while) I remember that I talked to a trans man about it, he'd been going through the process for a couple of years at that point and we'd talked about that too at different points.

And I remember mentioning that I'd thought about hormones, but I was still on the fence because I'm nonbinary, not like 'binary trans' (i.e. I'm not going from point A to point B, where you move from AFAB to man or AMAB to woman), and I was talking about wanting they/them pronouns and maybe he/him pronouns at that point.

And he said: 'Oh cool, yeah, hopefully that helps until you decide for sure with testosterone and surgery.' I had this moment of like ??? and he was like 'when you realise and can be brave enough to commit to being a guy, I hope that goes really well for you.'

It was one of the most transphobic things I'd ever heard, not because it was said from a hateful place (it really wasn't, I'm still friends with this guy), but because it came from a friend, I was being very vulnerable during the conversation and it left me feeling like I didn't have a right to consider myself trans at all for about two years after that. It pushed me into this space where I'd been defined by a fellow trans person as a 'coward until I decided to be officially a man.' And then for two years I kept looking for that inside of myself, denying my non-binary-ness in favour of looking for a very clear and decisive 'I'm a man!' moment. It was a horrible period of time, gender-wise. Because being identified exclusively only as a man or a woman is dysphoric to me, so trying to do it to myself was like cutting at myself with an axe.

It's also very much like when gay and lesbian folk would say to me - back when I identified as bisexual - 'get back to me when you pick a side / become a real queer.' There's a real phobic bent among folks who are 'one or the other' (sighs) towards people who are in the liminal with this stuff and that's where they belong. And it hadn't occurred to me that I'd hear a version of that from a fellow trans person. You'd think I'd have learned, right?

He and I are still friends, but I stopped talking to him about all of my experiences as a trans and nonbinary person. It was clear to me, in that moment, he saw me as a much lesser version of an identity he'd embraced and was living. You know, how so many people think of nonbinary transmascs. (It's also frustrating, because trans men also don't need to have hormones or surgery to be trans men, and it makes me furious when people take this attitude with binary trans folk too, but I'm mostly focusing on my own experience here, of the myriad ways we encounter transphobia in the trans community).

I never heard anything quite like that again, but I've had one other trans guy be like 'when you're ready for testosterone, I'll support you' like he was waiting in the wings for me to 'fully make a decision to be 100% a man' which isn't a decision I can make, because I'm not 100% a man, lmao, I'm like 80% of one, and 20% something else, and 0% woman, lmao, which is why I call myself nonbinary transmasc.

I was lucky that through research and listening to voices in nonbinary transmasc spaces and more open-minded trans spaces that I realised that I'd encountered transphobia, and that this specific kind of transphobia is particularly common in the trans community, especially in cases where a trans man or woman has a period of being nonbinary as an experiment to see what transitioning feels like before they fully commit to the surgery and/or hormones and name etc. that they often wanted all along. So they often project this onto other people, because for them being nonbinary was a midway point, or the middle of an evolution. But being nonbinary isn't an experiment for most nonbinary people, it's literally our identity and it always will be. (And any binary trans person reading this, don't ever use this rhetoric with your nonbinary friends, or your fellow binary trans friends who have elected not to use hormones or surgery - it's transphobic.)

These days, I'm proudly trans and proudly part of the trans community, but I'm also aware that there are a lot of binary trans people who will treat me and other trans folk as 'other' because I haven't suffered through the same surgeries or adjustments that they have. That's...their transphobia, and it's not me expressing my identity wrongly, or being 'lesser', it's just straight up transphobia. It belongs to them, not to me. I don't believe we have a unique word for nonbinary transphobia, it all comes under the same umbrella, but that's definitely what it is.

When you start to feel like you don't belong, anon, remind yourself that this is internalised transphobia, not to punish yourself, but to remind yourself that it's not true. Those feelings belong to the people who gave them to you, but they're not innately or inherently true, they actually have nothing to do with how valid you are at every stage of your transition.

You're fully a trans man if you don't take hormones, and you're fully nonbinary if you do. Whatever you need (or don't need) to affirm or express your gender for you, is what you need, and that deserves to be respected and fully validated no matter what, at any time. Whether it's binding or not binding, hormones or not hormones, hormones and then 'not for the next few years' and then hormones again, surgery or not surgery, etc. Whether you're a trans man, woman, nonbinary, agender etc.

People have this idea of what it is to be a 'proper' trans, bi, gay, lesbian person (like the 'gold star lesbian' which is horrendously disgusting as a term and concept), but all you need - literally all you need - re: these things, is to just... know you're these things. That's it. That's how a gay person can know they're gay without having sex. That's how a bi person can know they're bi without sleeping with someone of the same sex. And it's how a trans person knows they're trans without looking perfectly androgynous or perfectly binary trans (depending on what they desire) on the outside. (Don't get me started on fatphobia in androgynous and nonbinary spaces, and the equation of true 'nonbinary androgyny' with thinness, because that's a whole other rant for another day, lol).

I'm sorry you've experienced that pressure to be 'more' of something from society / particular people. I can specifically relate on the hormones front because I actually went quite far into looking into taking T, to the point where my doctor was ready to sign off with an endocrinologist, before I realised that it wasn't the right decision for me. It might be one day, but right now I know I'm transmasc without it, and I'm concerned about some of the side effects with my neuroendocrine tumours. There are other ways I affirm my gender that work great for me. But I did have a moment of knowing that would impact how other people see me, and it's one thing when it comes from all the cis people, but it's another thing when it comes from the trans community as well. :( Thankfully most people are really validating now, use the right pronouns, and I just don't confide nonbinary vulnerabilities with folks who saw being nonbinary as a midpoint of their own evolution/journey, just to be safe, lmao.

Wishing you fortune and strength and much validation, anon <3 You are amazing as you are, whatever you decide to do or not do in the future. :) *hugs*