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fumifooms · 4 months

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Chilchuck, family & alcoholism

Collection of thoughts and speculation on Chil’s upbringing, his dynamic with his family and how alcoholism ties into it all. If you want the groundwork info on Chil’s background I recommend my masterpost on his family, here beyond a summary of the facts it’s really just me speculating from the crumbs we get of his parents and siblings, how it’s all affected him and in turn affected his own wife and kids etc etc.

There’s nothing more I’d like on mother’s day than to speculate about Chilchuck’s maladaptive attachment style. I’m fascinated by how distant everyone is and how much he’s been devoted to them all despite having been so absent. Intergenerational trauma get over here

Actually it’ll be easier if I make a rundown here too, it’s just stuff I reiterate from my masterpost tho.

Tiny table of contents: 1- rundown: family facts 2- rundown: alcoholism 3- dad 4- parenting 5- daughters 6- wife

^ Every time his dad gets mentioned. His mom never gets mentioned. His siblings I think are only ever mentioned in this extra, and then there are more ambiguous relatives cameos.

We know is hometown isn’t Kahka Brud, but we’re not sure wether he moved there upon getting his own house (presumably around when he got married at 13), or if it’s only after his wife when he rented out his place to relatives then rented the place in Kahka Brud.

If he rented it out to relatives, maybe that meant it was in his hometown? Especially if he and his siblings are "almost strangers" so presumably he doesn’t really keep in touch with his family. And I mean, he hasn’t seen his wife or daughter in 4 years so you can imagine how he’s like with his more distant family…

Additionally half-foots and Chil are very coded to be from an impoverished opressed working class people. So that’s the context.

I’ll say that I mentioned intergenerational trauma at the beginning, and I def think the distrust of elves is part of that, but here I want to focus on the interpersonal effects rather.

Copy pasting my masterpost thoughts overall: Chilchuck is hinted to have had a rather dysfunctional family himself (alcoholic father, distant siblings, etc). So he doesn’t really have the best model on how to raise someone and such. I imagine it was a sort of neglectful home situation, where the kids are encouraged to be independent. If they didn’t have to work or help around much, then a free range parenting sort of thing.

We do see how the family has full and warm feasts, where someone cleans his mouth with a rag, so it’s not like he didn’t have caring people or had a tragic childhood though! I don’t remember if it’s explicitely stated but he’s heavily implied to having grown up poor, as most half-foots, and I just think it’s the hardened hardworking family type of childhood where just like he does with others, they instilled somewhat harsh life lessons in him, which in turn encourages him to indulge in the simple pleasures of life like alcohol and sex, or at least women’s beauty and crass jokes. We do see he seems more optimistic when he’s younger in flashbacks, so a bunch of his harsh view on the world is still likely learned and earned rather than taught.

I still think he inherited many flawed views from how his father acted, like his attitude about excessive drinking not being a big deal, it being worth it. That work hard play hard, enjoy life die young mentality he has, shown mostly in the “alcohol” section of his Adventurer’s Bible profile, could very well be partly a result of the general poverty half-foot communities are that he grew in as well, like how he doesn’t hope for things to be as best as they could be and contends with good enough. As far as I remember, his mother is never mentioned, but I doubt it implies she was out of the picture. She was probably a regular sort of mother that took care of the home and was still around when his father died, not unlike how Chil’s wife was implied to be a housewife. It looks like there’s a good age gap between one sibling to the next, that could be interesting to speculate about too. Mostly though I think it’s big family because it’s just sorta what happens when you regularly have sex and you don’t have contraception, being poor often makes family planning harder for various reasons and leads to more children.

Alcoholism context rundown:

Good Chilchuck analysis baseline here. Alcohol seems to be his main stress reliever/coping mechanism, especially for how emotionally constipated he is, and his job is being stressed about his party’s safety. Then he also mentions as a changeling that having his senses dulled feels relaxing to him, further confirming alcohol, as a drug that dulls senses, is something that he likes for the intoxication aspect and feels it’s relaxing. Alcohol also acts as a hunger suppressant, so it for sure has played a role in his dieting and unhealthy eating/diet habits, especially since he shows the instinct to drink to soothe hunger, all of that about how going hungry for 3 days used to feel manageable. Chil dieting info compiled here.

Chilchuck is at his most effortlessly cheerful when drunk or drinking. Compilation of every time he was drunk here.

And to be clear, a cheerful drunk is still a drunk. He literally will drink anytime he gets the opportunity to even if he’s aware overdrinking leads to health problems and death. Like canonically. He does NOT see how drinking should be a problem and does not seek to show restraint with it.

Dad of the dad

Marcille and Chilchuck having a talk on how losing a dad be like "You lost your dad young too…? I know how it is, it must have hit you hard…" "No not really tbh. Do you want lasagna or chicken for dinner?" <- either genuinely doesn’t feel much about his dad’s death or has 10 layers of repression, idk which is worse

I think Chil not making a big deal out of his dad’s death, not having worries in following into his footsteps that way in the least, is super interesting.

As a buddy @saccharineomens puts it: " I kinda imagine chilchuck and his dad didn't have a bad relationship, but in general chilchuck is so blase about drinking (he sees it as a delightful time, a wonderful thing! he wouldn't mind dying doing something he loved!) that he's not very upset about his dad's passing? like "yeah, he died, but i was already an adult, he was an adult, he made his choices, i make my choices, it's cool" " And I’ll nitpick that we don’t know how old he was when his dad died, I always assumed it was pretty early since Chil left home when he got married, and like I’ve gone into he doesn’t seem to be the keep in touch type. It’s on the table though, and he could have learned about it through letter if nothing else and that contributes to the "meh" reaction.

And that is very Chilchuck, the whole "we made our choices, it is how it is, he died doing something he loved", and you can totally believe that that’s the crux of it, but I do think the nonchalance hints at the family overall being distant and not only the siblings, that there’s dysfunctional shenanigans going on in there more than just… Healthy coping and having moved on.

I wonder when Chil first drank… And I wonder how he came to realize he liked alcohol a lot. His father probably gave him sips… Or he stole them

No because, with how disaffected he is about his father and siblings I could definitely see him having started to kind of numb himself/dissociate with the help of alcohol in that home environment that felt so… Either devoid of feelings or too messy to get attached. I can totally see his family being one that encourages dealing with feelings by bottling them up.

Because too… We saw him have a family/community feast of some sort presumably when he was a kid, in that chapter cover, so it’s not like there’s no warmth or sense of family at all, but then like… What went wrong? If as I theorize that girl with short black hair in that panel is his future wife, since she’s his childhood friend and all, what if his family/home life was always kind of cold and distant, even when gathered and cheery or despite those occasions? So then it’s like, at the family gatherings, she’s the most important person there to him, the one he actually connects to the most, the warmest presence he has…….. Someone he jokes around with that feels on the same speed as him, that doesn’t have the same connotations as everyone else present, a bit of a haven, someone different, a breath of fresh hair and a regained sense of childhood… Spitballing of course of course

I feel like they had a pretty big family and they were poor and such so there were always chores to be done etc, so their household might have operated like a mini busiess of sorts where everyone’s too busy, always has this and that to do and the mother asks them to go do tasks. I used to think it might be more of a neglect situation, where the kids are expected to provide for themselves and so cook their own meals and whatnot, both parents distant, but I don’t think so with the feast illustration. Chil at the beginning of canon used to see eating as a practical thing more than anything, you have to eat to live but don’t eat much or your weight will make your job more dangerous, might as well skip meals and have beer instead, etc etc. So the thought that he doesn’t know how to cook all that well despite this speculated background where he cooked for himself and keeps cooking minimalistic, since he does tell Senshi he taught him about cooking, is fair, but still… There could definitely be a situation where his older siblings were pushed into a parental role too, where they helped with the food and raising the younger siblings etc etc. As mentioned, the age gap between siblings may play into the dynamic as well. But on this front I have less ideas…

So yes my general take on Chil’s family is that everyone was too busy to emotionally connect as much as is normal, the parenting leaving things to be desired with alcoholism and emotional neglect.

Fathering

And I think that’s especially interesting considering he hasn’t been keeping in touch with his daughters either. It’s "they’re independent now" and that’s kinda it. His daughters haven’t sent him letters or visited him or tried to make him talk to their mom again. It does feel like with his own parents and siblings to me, where people are almost strangers, where relationships grow apart and everyone shrugs and goes ‘that’s how things are’. Is it that everyone including all his daughters gave up on trying to keep in touch, or is it that they all went "well divorced or not he’s absent, this is our normal tbh", and which is worse?

So yes, I think his relationship with his daughters is probably similar to his relationship with his parents, sort of hands off. Chil's dad was probably not a good dad but probably not quite a bad dad. A definitive He Was There, to quote another friend heh

Imo the thing with Chil is that he was pretty absent bc of work travels to dungeon dive, right. He’s working hard to provide for his family but in the process he’s not spending much time with them, slowly making a gap grow between him and them as they drift apart and change as people. He’s a career dad who never realized spending time with his family was more important and threw his pager into the ocean— But also here’s the thing!! You want to say being his family is more important, but money is arguably more important! They’re poor, they don’t have the privilege of free time as much. Sure he’s not there, but he is providing for them what they need to keep living and growing healthily. Similarly, you want to say Chil should stop doing harsh dieting for weight management, but, he has a point, maybe starving is still preferable than dying in traps. Of course the ideal would be to change jobs, but again, life is a struggle and that’s not always an option.

^ Truly the classic "if you don’t listen to me, your parent, a cryptid is gonna kidnap you!" international experience………

He is so so so the "What? My way of parenting is kinda bad? But my father raised me like that, and look how great I turned out!" <- emotionally dysfunctional…….. "Pshhh what do you mean having an alcoholic parent negatively affects you? My father was an alcoholic too and look at me" 🤡

All of it was behavior normalized to him. And listen, I’m saying this but not as like, shirking of his part in it. This isn’t a teen or young adult, he’s middle aged, he’s become the one giving and not receiving the generational trauma. He’s chosen to never think deeper on the topic.

And like, he himself is so indifferent to his father and what their relationship was like, of course he wouldn’t notice if a parenting choice wasn’t great for his daughters. He doesn’t have a relationship with his dad, he’s not (at least not consciously) traumatized by him, so from his perspective it’s mission success! He got raised decent enough 👍⭐️ Except he doesn’t realize that like, not particularly caring if he died is sign of a problem between them in itself… And this even as he remains somewhat of an important figure in his life, especially since that’s who he sees on the other side of the life river in the ghost chapter. It’s implicitly the biggest instance of loss through death Chilchuck has in his life I think.

But despite it all he obviously does love his family a lot, right. So I do believe that like, while he has imperfect standards when it comes to parenting he still tries to be better than his dad was, that even if it’s necessary that he has a lot of long work travels, he spends time with them. And there’s sort of this dissonance that he’s both "it doesn’t matter wether i’m here or not, they’ll live, they’re tough girls. Oh they didn’t like my scolding earlier? It’s just how kids are" dismissive and "I love them so much and I want them to have a good life. I want to do my best by them" devoted and so so caring. And like that’s why he works so damn hard, he does it for them, but also that’s why the girls grew up with an absentee father and aughhhh AUGHHHH the unsolvable dilemma of it all Chilchuck in Dunmeshi truly represents like, the harshness of reality & the world and how sometimes things will just suck no matter what, and then of course balancing that with Marcille in their shared arc where she tacks on "And despite that there is beauty everywhere even in the small and menial things, despite that your flawed relationships and dreams are still worth fighting for" ie giving reconciling with his wife a shot, etc.

All that said I think the very strict "you’re gonna grow up to have a stable job by god, young miss" attitude, those strong work ethics he highly values and focuses on and no doubt tried to instill in is own kids, is something he somewhat inherited from his own upbringing and parents.

In my masterpost bit on his parenting, I said I don’t think he’d do any kind of corporeal punishment, but. I do wonder about spanking aftee all. It can be so so easy to rationalize it… Sigh

Daughter pov

Again, my general interpretations for the daughters are written in my masterpost. I think Patti knows her father the least and is the one least worried about jobs and stability and least settled down as a result. Flertom is the more social one who I imagine tended to be the one worried about her parents’ couple and their emotions the most. And Meijack… Ohh Meijack.

When your father tried his best to provide for you but he worked all the time and even when he was home he was either tired or stressed and he’s always liked to get drunk to relax and cheer up. When you know he values work ethics and respectability so you grew up to be capable and quiet. And when he says you’re like him you’re sort of puzzled, does he really know you so little, or does he know himself so little? But you like the feeling of your father ruffling your hair so you accept it and still you stand next to your mother just as quiet and just as stoic during family gatherings. He leaves again and again and when your mother leaves him nothing changes, really. You wonder if it’s more telling that you know him better than he seems to himself or that you don’t know him as much as you wish you did, or that you don’t think about him all that much these days. Out of sight out of mind

Thinking of those posts about how kids never forget and during the "draw your family!" things at school, some of the kids draw their working parents seperate from the rest of them...

Absent father and when he’s at home you get the crumbs of him that you get and you’re grateful for it and that’s that <333

She doesn’t know how much he loves them bc he hasn’t showed them in a long time </3

The horror of drunk Chil in my fics is often about what in this state he can’t do rather than what he could do, how someone who’s as proud of his skills and work ethics as he is has truly changed, not comprehending how he could become so sloppy or how he could allow himself to get like this, marred the values he preaches above all else. It’s in the way that he fumbles with doorknobs, that he could never lockpick a door if you were to lock it, and it both being your salvation and bringing you extreme distress at the thought of it all. His footsteps usually featherlight now sound heavy as stone, like a troll’s.

You know the thing that gets me so bad with alcoholism angst is when people describe the drunk person as a stranger. Often making a metaphor that they’re monsters, have some monster they shapeshift into uncontrollably once in a while, as a way to split the unreconciliable halves of the person sober and drunk in your vision of them……. It gets me soooo bad Little Puckpatti growing up on tales of trolls kidnapping disobedient kids and replacing them with doubles so no one even knows they’re gone… Coming face to face with a drunk Chilchuck that roams the halls of the house with heavy steps in the night, because she wanted to go drink a glass of water, too thirsty to sleep………..

And this is where I reveal that I wrote a fic about just that!! Trolls that thump and tiptoe through the night Mei @ Chil, You made me of stone and still every day you wear me down and chip away at me bit by bit

In the end notes I describe my takes and interpretations: With Mei I tried to give the sense of a kid who sacrifices some parts of childhood to feel closer to her parent, like not playing games to spend more time with him no matter how empty, or wanting to be worthy in his eyes. With Fler, since she was the one in canon to take in their mother and write Chil a letter explaining the situation, I feel like she’s always been the one most involved and aware of the problems in their family. The one most there to emotionally support or to understand what the vibes in a room meant. Puckpatti I think knows her father the least, since with time I think Chilchuck was more and more away from work and more and more cynical like the flashbacks of younger him dungeon diving. I think because of her not minding unstable odd jobs that she’s the most passive, that she’s the most go with the flow. I do also love when Mei is the one most aware of her parents’ flaws and most critical as the eldest, but not in this fic. Meijack grows up to never touch a drop of alcohol, what people joke is the one difference between her and her father. Flertom drinks, too much sometimes, but she considers drinking should be a social activity rather than a habit. Puckpatti only drinks on special occasions when she has the chance.

They already don’t have that much time together because of his work, I wonder how big of a percentage the amount of memories the daughters have of him are when he’s not himself truly… How they kinda reconcile it all. It’s their normal.

And the thing that’s gutting too, is that Chil always looks so so much more open, relaxed, cheerful and happier when drunk than he usually is. He doesn't know how to get his defenses down without alcohol

"you're all that's good"

Because we do see how he truly used to not be so closed off and bitter. But distrust and fearing for betrayals from both coworkers and then his wife aka the person who’s supposed to be closest to him (he doesn’t even have close family besides his daughters. Does he even have close friends) turned him into what he is now. He was so cheerful!! Happy and trusting and optimistic.

He leaves and she left

God there’s the whole ‘wife leaving him’ trauma too is the thing… It had to have fucked him up so bad like no wonder he got paranoid and decided not to open up to ANYONE like. He never saw it coming is the scariest thing. He didn’t expect her to just up and leave. He didn’t see the warning signs. He won’t know if it’s coming this time either.

….. But then also, why he didn’t reach out to her (besides hurt) was because it was a petty silence treatment, like "oh she left without saying a word? Fine well I won’t reach out to her either" <- man who is so not fine and collected about it. It’s been FOUR YEARSSSSSSS I wonder if he always was like… "This week she’s gonna send a letter. … Ok fine, this month she’s gonna crack. … Within the year she’ll come crawling back." and it’s a bit why it was allowed to go on for this long unchecked like… Why he still considers her his wife even though functionally she’s more of an ex by that point after 4 years.

I can never stop thinking about him and his wife they’re fucking crazyyy. Him not reaching out to her started as a silent treatment from frustration. She never reached out to him either, she just up and left, didn’t even leave or send one last letter she’s just gone and has left this all behind, the house and everything in it. It’s been 4 years but he still considers her his wife and considers themselves only "estranged", "due to circumstances we haven’t seen each other in years". His face in the panel he said this is interesting too, trying to be casual but defensive and exasperated, already dreading the judgement and questions. He moved out of his house to rent a place in Kahka Brud instead. How much of him not reaching out was avoidance… Guilt, frustration, sadness, confusion, just procrastinating and dread and fear of a rejection more concrete, or something else… Maybe realizing he doesn’t miss her as much as he should, not enough to chase after her or try to get her back, just resigning himself to it… Is he a bad husband, is he a bad person? Should they reconcile?

Not seeing it coming… It’s half trust, that this person who’s so dear to you could never just up and leave and hurt you like that, half entitlement, thinking that she would never think of leaving, and third it’s blinding himself to the warning signs, not wanting to believe or acknowledge them. Because like, there WERE some, he said she "suddenly fell into a bad mood on the way back [from the outing]" and I don’t think he’s too dumb to be aware that something was off, he literally just dismissed it and then went surprised pikachu face when it turned out things were indeed off.

Part of it is definitely, how do you even react if your wife walks out on you without warning. If it happened to me I think that I wouldn’t reach out for a while either, wait for them to reach out to me first, give them space. As I put it in one of my marchil wips, "I respect your right to be rid of me too much to try and shackle you to me if you want to leave". Inaction is easier than admitting he’s scared to check and find out that the worst case scenario is true. It’s been years and he still hasn’t worked it out why she left. Do you think that’s on purpose. That he doesnt want to know for sure. It’s so so so scary to try and do anything about it

He said he didn’t reach out right away when she left because he was petty and wanted to give her the silence treatment back. Ok but is it that he blames her for their marriage falling apart or does he blame himself and he’s just misdirecting the conflicted feelings? Did he not reach out because a part of him was too scared to know why she left or if she would refuse to come back? Did he just think that she’d come back on her own, and things would get fixed while still staying unsaid and unconfronted like they always have, the first month, then the next and the next, until it was a year in and it sunk in that oh, maybe she wasn’t coming back?

He seems genuine here when he says that he was angry about it and gave her the silent treatment, but it is an habit of his to lie to make himself look worse instead of showing vulnerability, so who knows.

He is so so scared of being affected by relationships. Same thing with his compulsive habit to disguise his worry for anger. It’s why he doesn’t want people to have expectations of him, "I’m a coward I’m selfish", because then they can’t be disappointed, they can’t be surprised if he bites, they can’t leave when you lose what they’ve been staying for.

He has avoidant tendencies too. Every time there’s an interpersonal issue he just accepts it’s out of his control immediately. He’s passive when it comes to relationship problems, just like with coworkers, relationships are a ticking time bomb to him, and he just wants to be left out of it and come out unscathed. It comes back to his pessimism. He doesn’t think that like, things could be better. According to him life is tough and cruel, you accept your lot in life and make the best out of it and that’s it. If people are scummy you don’t whine about how unfair it is, you close yourself off and work to not be taken advantage of again and adapt. So then with his wife, when Marcille is like "Have you tried… Talking?" it’s such a crazy idea that it might work at all, that he could have the power to fix things… And that’s why it’s such a big deal when he goes "Alright I’ll try… I don’t know if it’ll go as well as in the stories, but I’ll try". That CRUMB of allowing himself to be hopeful is so huge

Honestly for the longest time I misread this bit, I thought she left in the night like how Marcille framed it, but no she left after he left for work. She left after he left again.

The way it’s told, it really sounds like Chilchuck just came home from work, stayed probably a couple of days in which they went to that outing together, then left for work again right away/soon after and it’s like. Was that outing the most special thing you guys did together. You came home from like a month of work, you had one outing where she ended up having a bad time, y’all didn’t talk about it further and then you left for another couple of weeks. Are you kidding me

Your married life is waiting for your husband to come home, spending mediocre time together, being shut down when you voice discontentment, and things being left unaddressed before he leaves again.

She left when he was gone for work, but did she leave the day of, or did she flip flop on it and took a while before working up the strength to leave? Was she waiting to see if he’d say anything before leaving and when he didn’t that was the last straw?

Chilchuck trying to prove a point that half-foots can make it out there, trying to rely more on himself because that’s the only person he can trust. His wife feeling like he's leaving her behind (because he does. over and over and over and over.) This guy just keeps throwing himself into work because he thinks it's what's best for everyone. Hey sir neglecting emotional needs can be kinda detrimental to everyone involved, I think you might wanna know that ^ quotes courtesy of @soappox

And to come back to alcoholism for a bit, alcoholism is alcoholism, and someone asked why I thought that a Chilchuck with depression would drink and cope through alcohol, since drinking seems to be something cheerful to him. It does puzzle me a bit but it’s worth going over, so… I don’t think him using drinking as a coping mechanism is far fetched at all. Cheerful drunks that are alcoholic still can absolutely use alcohol in ways like that. If something makes you happier, or even just more numb which translates to you feeling more free etc etc, then I definitely think it tracks that he’d keep drinking. Like personally I do think he’d drink a lot after his wife left him, and in rough patches like that. Depression -> not wanting to have to think, the days are blurring together and you either don’t want to be conscious or you want to feel something etc etc -> drinking for the alcohol. Alcoholics tend to be, well, dependent on alcohol. If something bad happens etc they’re usually more likely to go harder on it rather than stop. We can debate on when and why Chilchuck first started to drink but it’s straight up his favorite food now and it’s deeply ingrained in his life, in his favorite outings and activities and priorities and moods and meals. A CHEERFUL DRUNK IS STILL A DRUNK!!! They drink to get happy not drink because they are happy, though obviously the two can have overlap.

Chil represses sooo much. His solution to interpersonal conflict and feelings is just don’t think about it and dull your feelings & senses to everything ✨ I love him. I need to kill him with hammers Like the other day I was thinking about an AU where he might have ran away from his neglectful home or something, but then I remembered he deals with everything including his family by dulling his feelings and senses to things 🫠 He wouldn’t leave

I’d say he doesn’t look troubled by loss through death, moreso loss through mistakes. His nightmare is his daughters dying yes, but moreso them being killed, there’s an axe in the wall etc, it’s about having failed to protect them.

If he can’t fuck something up or if he’s already fucked it up there’s this pacifying sense that he can’t have the rug pulled from under him, because that’s what having connections is, having a wife isn’t an insurance it’s a rug waiting to be pulled. And his brand is sort of Flawed Mr Mistakes Man so he’s kinda been having to cope lol. I do think he throws himself into workaholism, because it’s sort of the only way to live he knows, making yourself capable and useful and spending his days working like that, less time to think, too tired to think. Senses dulled, senses that are usually too sharp, cutting with clarity that he prefers ignoring and avoiding. Work is something he doesn’t have to feel through, something that gives him pride and self-esteem, something through all the danger and life or death risk feels safer, emotionally. No one taught him how to deal with things another way, it’s always been suck it up and work.

Conclusion

Stop smoking we love you and we don’t want you to die

No drinking will not externalize your feelings no it won’t vent them out well please Chilchuck ple-ea-ease…….

</3 They should invent an alcoholism that doesn’t make you dysfunctional and hard to be around

^ Drunk, by The Living Tombstone

I’ve been thinking about enneagrams and Chil is 6w7 highkey. Becomes 3 when stressed, a little 8 but it’s more that he wants security so much that he becomes paranoid rather than having the core of an 8 y’know. I haven’t dug into it for quotes yet but this paper goes hard if you’re curious.

Dropping my relevant Spotify playlists here bc why not: Chilchuck & his wife, marchil angst

#I’m allergic to making short casual speculation posts apparently #Dungeon meshi #chilchuck tims #chilchuck’s family #Chilchuck’s wife #theories #meta #analysis #It was mother’s day when I decided to gather my old discord message and work on posting this so. Not fixing that intro #I’m always too late </3 #Marcille singing A Girl Worth Fighting For @ Chilchuck #Spoilers #i lost half of this post TWICE. This is my Joker arc #Hopefully i can finish my web weaving about this today #Chilchuck is so cool I wish dads were real #Chilchuck “my family doesn’t need me” tims #This almost killed me it’s not even the topic it’s bc tumblr wanted me dead. This silly post. It was supposed to be CASUAL and SHORT #Analysis #i just ended up talking about chil a lot again. Give me excuses to talk about him more #Character analysis #meijack #Puckpatti #flertom #fanfic #Fumi rambles

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sapphic-agent · 4 months

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lmaooo not bryke themselves saying katara loves aang like a babysitter or little brother. it's so obvious in the show that katara views aang like that most of the time.

that's why aang gets so offended when it gets referenced by the ember island players and katara is confused about starting a romantic relationship with aang in the same episode. yet the fandom wants to act like you're insane if you think katara mothered aang and they had a sibling dynamic for most of the series. they really just act like you pulled it out of your ass even though both the text and authorial intent are there.

meanwhile they continuously insist "zutara is siblings coded" when there's nothing in the series to imply that view and bryke have never described their relationship like that. plus, bryke having being so salty towards zutara's popularity means we never will get to see zuko and katara have meaningful interactions in the franchise ever again anyway.

it's so frustrating how katara becoming a couple with aang came at the cost of destroying her relationships with jet, haru, and zuko. basically any guy around her age that wasn't her brother would be sabotaged (with jet suffering it the worst) because they would all be deemed "threats" to kataang.

LMAO I STILL FIND IT FUNNY😭

Bryke defenders get pissy when you point out that them being cis straight white men in the 2000s would obviously correlate to the show's flaws. But this is literally one of the reasons why. No woman wants to be in a relationship with someone she takes care of and views like a little brother. They said this while trying to defend Kataang. I'd almost feel bad if every Kataang shipper I met wasn't exceedingly obnoxious.

Some of them even try to compare her relationship with Aang to her relationship with Sokka. But they're completely missing that a) she grew up with Sokka, b) Sokka treated her like crap while Aang was sweet, and c) Aang was in great emotional pain so of course she was nicer to him.

I don't mind thinking of Zutara as sibling-like, unless you're only doing that to shut down Zutara. I love their platonic relationship, it's one of my favorites in the show.

I will always be mad about Haru, but I'll always be even more livid about Jet. The way Bryke treated him was gross. Especially when Aang threw his name out to shut down Katara's feelings despite the fact that he died helping them. Aang deserves more shit for this idc

#anti kataang #anti kataang shippers #katara deserved better #zutara friendly #anti bryke #haru deserved better #jet deserved better #anon ask

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riewritten · 21 days

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in my head nothing absolutely bad happens in monster anime and they’re actually triplets in a family sitcom somewhere

more headcanons under the cut ✂️

-ˋˏ✄┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈

༘⋆ FOR CONTEXT

no child experiments. no kinderheim 511. their birth sequence would be Johan first, Anna second, and Nina the youngest. it doesn't actually materialize that much in their dynamics (given they're triplets) except that these two oldest are oooooover overprotective of nina. mama vera was forced to labor the three of them prematurely out of stress upon receiving the news of her husband's death. her brother-in-law, klaus poppe, who had helped vera with the kids after the hubby's death, tried to pursue her not long after. and not only that, klaus also tried to lure anna into this silly lil experiment about children which he claimed was for 'work' at the red rose mansion all the while their mother was out. vera almost killed the man when baby johan exposed him while crying. this event led vera to cut ties with the poppe family and valiantly raised her triplets on her own. vera wasn't able to squeeze any info out of anna (on what poppe had done to her specifically while she was out). worried that she might be traumatized, vera got her into therapy. in the end, only johan and anna knew of it, and whatever happened sure left wounds deep inside anna's heart.

SO, that said!

-ˋˏ┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈ ANNA

would be sooooo villanelle-coded (minus the psychopathy of course). like she is the Gaslight, Gatekeep, Girlboss but at the same time she could also be the Female Rage™️. i am absolutely whipped at the thought that she'd have a complicated relationship with johan despite being inseparable during childhood because she's astute enough to know the real him, without filter whatsoever, and she could notice things the naive nina couldn't. no, johan didn't have to be a murderer in this universe for anna to hate him, he just got The Attitude that anna despises. it's jus the typical sibling fight though no worries. it's like there's this modern family-esque interview segments of them talking shit about each other every episode (little do they know, if a war ever breaks, they would absolutely sacrifice themselves to save each other — of course after ensuring their youngest sister's safety first and foremost).

in @suusoh 's head which i claim to be the same as mine because susu is rie and rie is susu, anna is as queer as she could be. and, in my silly lil daydreams, she actually labeled herself queer for clout bc she wanna rebel against societal standards only for it to end up the truest thing she had ever said about herself years later. on top of that, she actually envies her twin brother for having a dick like oh my god girl what the hell is wrong with you. ironically, she tends to be an absolute man-hater sometimes (depends on her mood). she could be a little impulsive, too, especially when she reached the rebellious age. boyfriends here, girlfriends there, and out of curiosity she even tried polygamy that's absolutely not her thing but she did anyway to annoy her conservative christian stepfather.

there's this only moment anna had accepted johan's attitude, remorsefully so, and thats when some girl tried to maul nina at uni (thank god she's good at judo) after mistaking her as anna ㅜㅜ this stranger apparently had her boyfriend stolen by anna during one of her impulsive moments (jesus christ). nina assured them it was all good after anna cried. but johan was absolutely pissed, and anna had a hard time forgiving herself for putting her loveliest babiest angel of a sister in danger bc of her shenanigans.

-ˋˏ┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈ JOHAN

who is he, indeed, if red rose mansion wasn't that traumatic and kinderheim 511 never existed ? it's also hard to imagine for me, tbh, it's just that i think he'd be a chill lil guy who lives in his own head. nina has a hard time managing countless of confessions from different people in the campus—you see, anna is too wild to approach, johan is too absent-minded to care, and nina is the most amicable of them three. when nina opens her locker she'd expect a bunch of love letters addressed to three people: anna, johan, and then herself. majority of them is addressed to johan, tho.

if anna takes pride in her beauty and charisma while nina takes pride in her congeniality and physical prowess, johan keeps up with his brains. he is constantly the school's top one. he gets sent to other campuses for academic competitions. and back in highschool, a faculty even offered vera to have him accelerated due to his intelligence. johan denied the opportunity because he likes the fact that he's on the same grade level as his twin sisters. they have this sort of bonding where they do homeworks together as soon as they reach home. how would he do that if he's accelerated to a higher grade level? who would help nina manage anna's wild tendencies at school? who would help anna keep up with her acads if nina's too busy with her extracurricular activities?

vera is quite concerned johan is having a hard time connecting with people, but little does she know, her lil boy just doesn't want to. socializing is a chore the same way studying is. unless he has an ulterior motive, he chooses to stay at the corner with his books (boo. bummer. a nerd.)

-ˋˏ┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈ NINA

is their cute lil baby! she's everyone's favorite. i think her personality in canon monster (before her 20th bday) is pretty much the same in this one, except that it's more chaotic in her house because she has two sibs trying to kill each other here and there. if not for her extracurricular activities and side jobs (which johan and anna tirelessly demanded her to quit so she could have a rest, only to no avail because nina is the angel who wants to help), i think her academic excellence would be in par with johan's. she also has a lot of friends—that's the reason why johan and anna are protective of her. she could indeed defend herself physically, but she's too kind and naive for her own good it annoys the two. if someone makes her cry, they doubt nina would even put them in their place physically or emotionally because she is just that kind—that's when johan and anna enters behind her back. they could be sneaky little vengeful devils if need be for nina. maybe they got it from uncle klaus.

-ˋˏ┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈ ☆ ༘⋆

cutting this before it gets longer lol. thank u for reading! i hope you enjoyed this as much as i did lmao. i had sooo much fan imagining and drawing them this way 🤭

#johan liebert #anna liebert #nina fortner #liebert twins #franz bonaparta #klaus poppe #vera cerna #monster anime #monster manga #naoki urasawa #naoki urasawa's monster #naoki urasawa monster #monster fan art #anime #fan art #rie draws #johan liebert fanfiction #nina fortner fanfiction #anna liebert fanfiction

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antimony-medusa · 1 year

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"They're honestly so sibling-coded."

I grew up in a conservative, rural area where people got married young. It was not uncommon to see marraiges happen when the people involved were 19, 20, 21, and there was this sort of expectation that any relationship you were in in your teen years had like a 70% chance of leading to marriage. More, if you were especially religious. This attitude was so pervasive that if a woman was friends with a man, or even hung out together, there was this automatic societal assumption that you were early relationship, which led into late relationship, which led into where you were going to get married, which led into babies and a family.

And I hated it. I hated it because I was aroace and didn't know it yet, but even just as a baby feminist feeling out what it meant to be a woman and how I was perceived in the world, I hated the assumption that all my m/f relationships were only worth something if they were leading to romance and marriage (and babies). The idea that men and women couldn't be friends, because men only thought about women in a romantic/sexual way, was actively taught me by everyone from pastors to helpful older coworkers. I even got told that f/f friendships were basically killing time until you got into a romantic m/f relationship, which is where you'd find actual fullfilment and happiness. It sucked.

And then I moved away, and I got out of the conservative religious circles, and then in my 20s, people kept saying the same thing. At least it wasn't saying "god made you for relationships (and babies)," but it was still saying that y'know, men are only interested in one thing, and it's cruel to lead them on, and so on, and so forth. Half of the world is going to only think of you in terms of what you're good for in relation to their relationship status, and the other half of the world is going to tell you to suck it up and deal with it.

This is still the background radiation of much of the world, still. I am getting this less in my 20s because many of my male friends are married, (or gay), but still, as soon as I meet someone new the interested looks start to pile in. As a person who doesn't plan on getting into a romantic relationship, I do not love this.

Immediately seeing a m/f friendship and going "ooooo they're KISSING" is not respectful of the guy's ability to have friendships with people he's not having sex with, but let's look at what it messages about the girl in this scenario.

A) women are only worth talking about in terms of what they can do to for men, what they are in connection with men B) friendship is unimportant and not real, women only exist to be romance options

So I feel strongly about allowing women to be percieved as their own beings and have cross-gender friendships without turning it into romance.

This is not an uncommon take on the internet! I see a lot of people talking about allowing people to be friends without defaulting to shipping.

But I don't know how to tell you that seeing a m/f relationship and saying "Oh they're siblings", when we're talking about celebrities/streamers is still sending a lot of the same messages. The core thing you're communicating is still the same. It's falling into the same traps.

I get the sense that a lot of people see a relationship they want to sort of celebrate and enjoy, and they know that shipping is bad, so they just shunt the "oh they're special to each other" to the left into a family dynamic. I will just say they're siblings, that way nobody can accuse me of shipping, and I'm good!

But what this does is still messages a) woman are reduced down to their relationship with a man, into what they can do for the man, and b) friendship is unimportant and not real, women only exist to be non-romanceable family and the rest of them, the romance options.

If the only way you can conceive of a woman as being important to a man is either being romantic/sexual with him or by saying that they're related, that's still bad. If you literally have to put one of the strongest relationship taboos in our culture in the way or you'll just default into kissing I guess, that's still messaging some really concerning things about how you're portrating women.

And once inside the family dynamics, jesus fuck, you guys. Family dynamics have such a trend to slot women into nurturing and protective roles, where the "older sister" "is the one with the brain cell" and "will take care of him" and will be there suborned to his story to be a surrogate mother figure that takes care of him. This, frankly, sucks.

I am an older sister as a fairly important part of my identity. I love being an older sister. But the way this fandom treats older sisters as tiny non-sexual mothering machines with no interiority or autonomy is not good at all, when it comes to actively respecting women as people.

Honestly, I don't like either option, but when you look at how women get treated when sisterified in fanon (older responsible figure who will take care of our precious baby boy) and how women get treated when shipped (mothering options still exist here but also sometimes they dom him), I might prefer the shipping. And I just did a whole multi paragraph about how much the shipping sucks!

I'm not even going to get into what happens when women get actively assigned mom in a family dynamic. All the worst parts of shipping with none of the fun smut.

I am aware I am talking about the worst excesses of family dynamic here, because this fandom offers lots to choose from, and there are ways to do family dynamic in a good way. Some of the most important relationships in my life are familial, and when actually delved into, you can absolutely still portray a full and nuanced portrayal within a family dynamic. This is a possibility. But god, when I look at the fandom trends and what rises to the top of my dash, oof.

And like, there's a larger trend in this fandom where people seem to be incapable of thinking of friendships as valuable and worthy, if you see them as important to each other it must be familial, but when you do it with women, damn.

Can we give seeing women as full autonomous being who are capable of their own opinions and desires a shot? See them as more than just romance options or [illegal to romance] options? Just let them be friends? Please?

#discourse #fandom meta

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peculiaritty · 4 months

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Sunday character study/trauma study

Again! before i start this ramble there is tw for religious themes, abuse, mental illnesses (ocd especially) and grooming so please if you have any triggers regarding those please don't read ^^ 2.2 Penacony spoilers so please be warned and future leaks and/or theorys may be involved. NO future storyline leaks though. This might be split into parts- not sure! Things might be hyperlinked and these will count as my reference/evidence, theres no need to read them unless you're curious!! There might be a part two on this when Sunday does come out ! Edited 18/05 to correct mistakes/add things i forgot about it OK. Lets begin: GOD. Poor Sunday, i think a lot of people has seen Sunday's abuse unnoticed, and i honestly can't blame some people because sometimes we don't automatically pick up everything unless we are actively looking for something. Sunday is a very interesting character, and i don't necessarily think he is 'evil-evil' per say, he is more of a morally grey character rather than being right up evil. Some major pointers i want to bring up and will be discussed: -> neglect, emotional abuse and the grooming of Sunday by Gopher Wood AKA dreammaster. -> The 'family' dynamics and attitudes -> Sunday/robins ideologies -> headcanons, character design choices and religious imagery (Not a deepdive into the imagery!)

-> neglect, emotional abuse and the grooming of Sunday by Gopher Wood AKA Dreammaster.

The most clear thing we can see as of right now without any reading between lines- Robin and Sundays bond. They care for eachother very much, we know that Sunday is the eldest brother, we already know that from right off the bat, that he is indeed the protector of Robin. Such as any older sibling usually feels towards those born after them. Sunday in no doubt in my mind has firstborn syndrome, basically the main 'burden-holder' between the two. This is the first fact we need to understand before we delve in. Due to Sundays natural-protectiveness of his sister that leaves Sunday at the face/brunt of Gophers ideals, which means sacrificing himself at any cost. Which may be why Robin remains currently unaffected or/not as self-destructive as Sunday. One thing that is easily skipped over and not noticed, Gopher and Sunday share a completely transactional-non-familial bond as they seem to not have the common father-son bond what so ever, Sunday only refers to Gopher as master which hints at the wedge between them. Gopher has ever only inspired and encouraged Sundays pessimistic behavior, such as when the Charmony Dove fell, we can assume that both Sunday and robin are extremely young at the time, i position them to be around 6-8, while at this age children do start to grasp that death in permanent, in no way should a child i quote be saying anything along the lines of "i think people believe birds are meant to fly...because they've never seen those birds crashing to their death." while this 'kind voice' (Gopher) does seem unbiased and passive, there is no reason unless you have actively convinced and taught a child to think that way. While children do come to gain their own beliefs, and ideals, siblings usually remain with the same ideas and beliefs until they reach around 10-12 where puberty starts. The belief gap at such a young age between Robin and Sunday is too big for it to be just "growing up" most if not all children take joy in being naïve- and cheerful. it is only when we come to abused, groomed, depressed and neglected children we start to see such pessimistic behavior. Sunday does have first-born child syndrome, it is also a bit of a worry of how stoic and 'unfeeling' he is. He doesn't confine in anyone, and while yes, we could say this is normal- but in normal, healthy environments people always have someone to confine in. Sunday doesn't have that. This could purely be just his personality- as some people are simply coded that way. It just strikes differently when we compare Child Sunday unto his adult self, as seen in Robins trailer BOTH of them had artistic aspirations, and even though there is no 'heavy' implication, that one tear indicates to me that Sunday was indeed the more emotional one. Growing out of hobbies is normal, but Sunday is lacking of life, he generally looks lifeless. He could've grown out of them, but what I read between the lines is extreme shaming and guilt. The need to be 'perfect'. Just so he could be the 'sun' in the sky and maybe even please Gopher.

Another thing to point out- his OCD yes. This is another thing that is hidden but only few people have found. In this scenario i am not fond of actually just saying its because of his connection to Ena. i am more fond- and find it much more reasonable that it has impacted and grown from his trauma. While i will not clarify which i believe he has since thats leaning more into headcanon territory. Unhealthy childhood environments and events predispose and increase the risk of various psychiatric disorders and OCD is one of them. It is clear that Sunday has been indoctrinated and been taught to think the way he does now. The family is cultish and it doesn't seem to act as one, everyone has their own ideals- and motives, including Gopher. Grooming does not have to be sexual in order for it to be considered grooming, grooming is defined as when someone builds a relationship, trust and emotional connection with a child or young person so they can manipulate, exploit and abuse them. In this scenario, Gopher has essentially groomed Sunday to exploit him and use him as a sacrifice. Groomed and abused, religious abuse seems to be a big one in this especially considering the huge religious imagery in Penacony, but it is important to point out some common symptoms of religious abuse is doubtful faith and compulsive perfectionism which resemble in Sunday. Most times, religious abuse is often paired with other forms of abuse, most commonly being sexual grooming and emotional abuse. This does not leave other forms of abuse out such as physical however. Gopher has 'trained' Sunday to think this way (Sundays ideaology), and indoctrinated him for his own use, and you can see it in Sundays extreme ways of dealing with his belief. there is clear there's an external force in his thinking- Gopher.

-> The 'family' dynamics and attitudes To continue, the family- as again, all have very different ideals, and motivations in Penacony. They act as completely separate entities yet still collaborate with each other. One thing remains crystal clear to me, that this family- follows a royal family sort of dynamic, where everything is hushed, you mustn't be too emotional, or too illogical. Basically coming to the point where Sunday has directly been told to not worry about Robin. He was never allowed to grieve. He is not allowed to grieve which is a horrid thing to be put through. Even when Gopher does deliver the news of Robin being shot there is a lack of care, and concern, he sounds non-chalant, going on to mention, "once you've attended to your outstanding tasks…" In any family emergency of sorts, that's the last thing you want to be told, you want to be there as soon as possible. Gopher wood simply does not have enough care, or concern for both of his 'children.' While this is my pure assumption, i do have reason to believe that the Family does share a rather cold dynamic, such as any other usual dynamic that is seen in stories where there is a political, rich, or royal family.

lack of care towards children, and moreso encouraging less 'child-like' traits

Parental figures primarily not being involved in the childs care, it is most likely that both Robin and Sunday were raised by the servants of the house, while Gopher remained some sort of mentor towards the both of them.

Isolation from other children in different life scenarios/circumstances

- Most often, children in these scenarios get put into a protective bubble, unaware of the outside. henceforth, another reasoning why Sunday might be so scared of the outside world. -> Sunday/Robins ideologies Both of them are entirely separate eachother belief wise, but they have one goal in mind. Helping people. I would describe Robins ideals as being quite idealistic and soft, that has come to her naturally, and its quite sweet. she wants world where people can live how they want. Even if its a bad one. Sunday on the otherhand quite thinks the opposite, i would describe his as: 'To protect everyone, keep them safe from pain, and suffering, their freedom of choice must be taken so they will suffer no longer, even if that means sacrificing all that i have.' This comes on very intense, as he does you know. send an entire star system to sleep!! But, His idea isn't exactly wrong. As in those questions he posed to us- we would've done the same if we were in the same scenario. Of course- if one of our siblings we knew were going to get shot in the future because of the path they chose- we would do our best to do that. It makes sense. But logically, and emotionally speaking, it is not in our best interest to control other lives and what they wish for, and what they dream for. What does Sunday want? Nothing. he is entirely swallowed with trying to help other people. He has no dream for himself. His dream- is others peoples dreams. What Sunday wanted, out of the goodness of his own heart, and the unfortunate abuse he has been put through, essentially what we call a utopia/dystopia. IT IS utopian to think of a world without pain, with harmony, where everyone is happy. But because of our nature as people, we want choice. so to us IT IS dystopian to think of a world were we have no choice, were we live on autopilot always content. He seeks escape, and he's not ashamed of it. The most common reason people seek escape, is because they're scared. They are scared of facing what they need to face. He is scared, he does not wish to see pain and suffering, he knows and purely thinks things are doomed from the start. Its almost nihilistic. And i understand it. paired with his childhood, Gopher and how he gets stuck in the confessional box hearing the most horrendous things, i would be like him too. "is this apart of your plan?" It is Gopher who brought the order to Penacony. That line above, implies that this wasn't Sunday's plan at all. Gopher was going to use Robin in the first place, but Sunday, again, being the oldest took the forefront of the indoctrination and abuse- thats how he now blindly believes in it. Gophers plans and his reason why hasn't been revealed. but i doubt it was because he genuinely cared for his people. It is depressing to see who Sunday is as a person, purely pessimistic, and so lost but obsessed with his belief, but to me and other people he is relatable; to him, things don't get better. he wants to stay in the moment. Suspended in a dream that is too perfect to be true. He seeks escape, escape for everyone. Things do get better, whether that is now, or later. We just need to keep trying and continuing on, no matter how tiring it is. -> headcanons, character design choices and religious imagery (Not a deepdive into the imagery!) UP TO MY FAVOURITE BIT!! ok, heres something that genuinely makes me want to explode, because if this is on purpose it is brilliant. Pointed out by Matchua and i actually think the first to notice it. his wings look clipped.

They don't seem very oval and/or similar to how normal bird wings would look. This can also be seen in Harmony MC's splash art too, the Raven being Sunday, and of course, the Charmony dove, Robin.

While the birdcage imagery is used on Robin, i think it is so damn powerful that if this is a deliberate design choice, that Sunday has been clipped. Depending on the clipping, it renders birds unable to fly until they grow back, and even then there is horrendous people out there who permanently injure the bird by clipping it wrong so its never able to fly again. A birdcage has a key. But once you take away a birds wings like that, it cant fly. It represents how Sunday can never seemingly become his normal self again, he will always be consumed by his pessimism and fear for the world around him. how there is seemingly 'no hope' We know that Robin is not clipped because in her skill her full wings pop out (even if this is just an effect...still) It also represents how damaging abuse is, how it takes away someones dignity and freedom. Religious imagery!! i'm sure you can find some super deep dives into it but i think one of the main things is how Sunday represents Jesus from the Christian bible. The thorns across his coat tie in deeply with the fact that on the crucifix, Jesus was given a thorn crown which was used to belittle and mock him. Sunday falls back in the crucifix pose. He is the sacrifice. Not exactly to purge them of sin, but to give them an Eternal paradise. (which in Christianity, is what the purging of sin does, it gives us an eternal paradise next to God.) Headcanons: -> i believe Sundays OCD to either be of the Religious, Harm or Order OCD. i see all three occurring, but rather more on the Order/Religious side. -> Sunday is a people pleaser, no buts!! -> He has alot of shame and self hatred towards himself for wanting things, as he believes it doesn't make him 'perfect' -> He strikes me to have some form of anxiety, again this can tie in with the OCD -> His small/awkward chuckles are just him trying to cope, i feel like he does it alot more when he is anxious though, towards the end of the quest he doesn't chuckle, which officially means hes lost it (lmao poor guy) -> Very scared of making mistakes. Really small ones too. (as you find in some abuse victims.) -> jealous of his sister but he could never come to hate her, he just wishes he was able to participate in being creative too but i do think he was shamed for that, for being 'childish'. Robin was the 'jewel' of the family. Sunday never was. -> as some abuse victims do, he probably never understood or came to understand that Gopher was abusive to him, maybe after 2.2 possibly. And when he does come to understand God. He's got a lot of healing to do in himself. A lot of anger, grief, sadness- tons of processing. -> He doesn't like hugs at first because he was really not hugged as a child, but when he does get hugged it absolutely destroys him because he really really loves being validated and being held. Something that he lacked so much as a child. -> As birds do when their stressed, Sunday plucks the feathers out of his wings, which leads to him being insecure about them so he never really shows them, which is why he keeps them neatly folded Infront of his waist and hides the back part of his wings with his coat. -> Forgets to eat, drink and bathe due to working so much. He gets so lost in his work he's probably stayed up for more than 48 hours. (ok like i know its the dreamscape but listen.) -> I didn't add this into the first part, but including all of the other things i mentioned, Sunday was alot more quiet/introverted as a child as i interpret him to be, while Robin was more of a blabbermouth. So thats why Gopher decided on Sunday instead, lesser chance of anyone finding out about what he was teaching. -> Never had a day of rest in his life. He needs a break. That's pretty much all i've got to say though (i'm going to spare you from my headcanons i have on his behaviors. that list is LONG.), i just think Sunday is a really interesting yet heartbreaking character at the same time. Very relatable to alot of people. He's not genuinely evil. Just severely misguided and hurt. Thx for reading <3

#sunday #sunday hsr #honkai star rail sunday #honkai star rail #penacony #robin #hsr robin #robin hsr #childhood trauma #religious imagery #tw religious themes #tw child abuse #tw child neglect #character study #character analysis #2.2 spoilers

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bunni-v1 · 11 months

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hii, congrats on 500 followers! if it’s okay, i’d like to request idia, trey and leona with D, J, K, M, and T for the NSFW alphabet ^^

🍓AGH I FORGOT YOU LAST NIGHT! I'm so sorry, I was so tired I didn't even notice you among the full list of requests. Please find it in your heart to forgive me!

TW: Idia is REALLY fucking weird; Incest mention (NOT between Ortho and Idia); Idia being a creep; Idia's kinks; Idia

Idia

D - Dirty Secret: Idia is known to watch the cameras at NRC. What people don't know is those cameras are EVERYWHERE (minus the dorm rooms and bathrooms). He sees the students "sneaking around" in broom closets and darkly lit hallways. He hears the muffled whines and moans of "exhibitionists" trying not to get caught. Little do they know they've had his eyes on them the whole time and he's enjoying himself right along with them. It's even better if you're involved (in the case that you're not together, though he's not against cuckolding completely). Seeing his crush be dominated (or do the DOMINATING) by someone else gets him all hot and bothered.

J - Jack Off: He is in a sexual relationship with his right hand. He jacks off all the fucking time -- at least thrice daily. It's always to the worst shit imaginable too, like fucked up incest hentai, anime girls that are HARDLY legal, the shit you'd imagine a shut-in to be into. He's embarrassed by it, 'cause the shit he does is so gross. He'd find it hot if you wanted to watch him though. He'd be all whiny and shy about it, but it's honestly the sexiest thing he's ever done.

K - Kink: The better question is what kink does he NOT have? Roleplay, marking, hardcore bdsm, cuckolding, blah blah blah. You name it, he's considered it and gotten off to it at least once. However, his favorite thing? Soft mushy sex. The kind where you hold his hand and tell him how good he's doing, how well he gets you off, how big his dick is, how pretty he is when he cries. Ugh, that's the shit for him.

M - Motivation: Brushing his hand with yours is enough to make him pop a boner. You can't blame him though, he's never felt the touch of another person who isn't his literal family.

T - Toys: Yeah of course he uses toys. He has a collection (that he HIDES like it's the nuclear codes or something) that he uses on himself when he feels like it. If you wanted to use them on him he wouldn't be opposed... if you want him to use them on you, well, that's even better.

Trey

D - Dirty Secret: Believe me or not, Trey is a fucking perv. He's REALLY ashamed of it because he's Heartslabyul's resident good-boy big brother. He's a role model for most of his dorm mates, so him creeping on the other guys in the locker room isn't something he wants to get out. Oh yeah, he's a panty sniffer lol.

J - Jack Off: Despite being a perv, he doesn't feel a need to get off all that often. Back at home, he doesn't have the time or privacy to. So he just learned to deal with a raging boner. However, when he does, which is rare, he prefers the fantasy of you under the table sucking him off during class over anything porn can offer.

K - Kink: Trey isn't all that kinky, other than the whole panty-sniffing thing. He likes things simple and easy, but he enjoys a power-dynamic kind of situation a lot. Never tell anyone this, but if you wanna play step-siblings with him, it's probably the hardest he ever cums in his life.

M - Motivation: Giving him personal attention over anyone else is a surefire way to get him up and going. Especially when other people want your attention, and you just hard focus on him. Sevens, he loves that, fuels a very rare possessive side of him that he doesn't let out often.

T - Toys: Nah, Trey's a pretty "I'm gonna do it myself" kinda guy. If a toy can give you more pleasure than he can, he's not really doing his jobe right, is he?

Leona

D - Dirty Secret: He wants to be DOMINATED. Put him in his PLACE, call him a good kitty, make him grovel, and beg for you to let him cum. It's his ultimate fantasy, and he wouldn't EVER admit it to anyone -- especially not you. He can't let you know you could have that power over him. (He's a hard dom until he's not, lol).

J - Jack Off: A lot of people say that Leona doesn't jack off but like...? Are we talking about the same character? There is NO WAY he doesn't just lay in bed and stroke it on a really lazy day. Like, yeah he doesn't particularly enjoy it, he'd rather have you, but you have to do what you have to do to get off.

K - Kink: Leona, surprisingly, isn't into anything too humiliating for his partner. I mean, he's got a humiliation kink that goes both ways -- but that's completely verbal degradation stuff. He's a choker, but he'd never slap you. He's pretty much into everything you'd expect a hard dom to be into, but he'd never physically hurt you. It's against his moral code.

M - Motivation: It's hard to get him motivated if he's not into something. So really, there's nothing that gets him motivated, he either wants to fuck you or he doesn't and nothing's changing his mind. Even that pretty silk set he bought you. He's tired now, come take a nap with him. (If you're insistent, he'll eat you out or smth, but don't expect much more than his mouth and hands.)

T - Toys: Leona, like Trey, is very much an "I can do it myself, we don't need toys" guy. And, he's right, he can. He honestly finds toys insulting to his ability and refuses ANYTHING like that ANYWHERE near him or you.

#twst #twisted wonderland #twst x reader #twisted wonderland x reader #x reader #bunni's treats 🧁#leona kingscholar x reader #trey clover x reader #idia shroud x reader

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risetherivermoon · 6 months

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i think about the oak twins a lot..especially considering the whole twins ending the world together thing, i just think that its such an interesting concept and i love to play with that, twins and siblings in media are so fun

the fact they're considered "the same person twice" constantly, and the way that they put each other over themselves and others, the codependency and different ways they mirror and reflect each other in different ways...the fact that sparrow was able to argue with henry as lark in such a convincing way that no one suspected it could've been the other twin, how lark is convincing enough as sparrow that it takes noticing the tattoos for sparrows own son to realize he was talking to lark instead-

they're both the lord of chaos, we rarely get a scene where the other twin isn't at least present in the room, and if we do its because they've been forcibly separated from each other- they share initiatives, they're together when we see them in Neverwinter, the school dance, and Papa John's, they share a wife-

like they're so different in ways but also the same, and they know each other as well as they know themselves, and when there was no one else there for either twin they still had each other, they both now how fucked up and shitty they are, yet they stick together and work as one, they both take the blame constantly for each others actions, like how sparrow talks about how he released the doodler as well, even though that was lark, and lark takes responsibility for code purple as well,

i just love them a lot and they're such interesting characters with a cool ass dynamic,

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blue-howlite · 6 months

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Look at them just stealing the show with their entrance (yes this post is to ramble about the recent chapters, get ready for a unhinged ride on the "Found family trope" rollercoaster).

People are like "Why are the best healer in the world and the guy that's always compared to Kayden here???" and they're just chilling being relatable, especially Kartein.

Them gathering around Jiwoo, not even trying to hide that they care about him. Like I would have expected Pluton to at least take a little distance and maybe judge Kayden and Kartein for being so close to him but he's just "Yes, I must stay close to this child."

Kayden and Kartein are so parent coded while Pluton is the socially unaware uncle that's just so out of it while taking in the practical aspects. He would absolutely teach Jiwoo how to properly stretch while Kayden and Kartein tell him to stop being so nice to everyone.

"Look at my son! ...proud is not the word I'm looking for" moment. Of course they're all super proud of Jiwoo. They can't stand the fact that he doesn't take advantage of the situation and has these moral/honor standards, but without that he would have never charmed these guys let's be for real now.

THEY'RE SO FAMILY CODED PLEASE JUDGING OTHER FAMILIES LIKE THEY'RE NOT A BUNCH OF LUNATICS THEMSELVES

The way Kayden leans towards Kartein like they're gossiping while Pluton listens in and gives his input to the convo, please they're a bunch of mothers talking shit about the other families at school.

The way they criticise Ian's education is the most parental thing I've ever seen.

The whole chapter was just Kartein being the sassy mother that worries about other kids disrespecting his, Kayden being the unhinged father that gossips and asks "Did you win?" whenever his kid gets into a fight at school, and Pluton the judging uncle that criticises his brother's parenting but joins sides with him when there are other parents.

Tell me that's not their dynamic.

Pluton always compared to Kayden and their "rivalry" being actually one sided is just so adult siblings coded, then Pluton going to Jiwoo like "Hey I'll show you something cool your dad hasn't taught you" is just uncle behaviour.

Kartein and Kayden not approving of Pluton doing what he wants and then realising they did the exact same thing is such a parent thing.

One thing is "They're such parental figures to Jiwoo", one is when they literally act like his parents even around other people.

#eleceed #kayden break #kartein #pluton #jiwoo seo #chapter 287 #chapter 288 #found family #rambling to the void #and the void smiles and nods while asking when will I release its family #Tumblr stop messing the layout I had to edit this post like three times DAMN IT

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punkeropercyjackson · 4 months

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'Incest is inherently complex and mature storytelling' always sends me and so does the historical significance of it as 'proof' it is.Ancient Greece is thee pedestary era because misogyny was so strong men would rather be incestous pedophiles than date women,incest as gay culture is almost ENTIERLY a white westerner thing and is frowned upon like everywhere due to the studies that proved it's familial abuse with no posibility of consent on both sides and sometimes even neither,'family members being ultra intimate/intense if they're the same gender is coded incest' is literal Gay Panic propaganda,m/f incest is always just dudebro fantasies that violently misogynizes the girl in it,a lot of incest shippers and incestplayers are simply only children and therefore don't really understand sibling dynamics OR middle/high schoolers who were exposed to incest shipping online through their fandoms and think they're smartypants edgelords that understand REAL drama only they're tragically just grooming victims and i could go on!It's not 'discrimination' to be anti-incest even in fiction and the bedroom,it's having a brain and care for other people!There's countless ways to tell a dark and even bleak story without involving positively potrayed incest,ESPECIALLY if it's just for porn and it's no longer just a private bedroom thing when you blog about it in PUBLIC tags that ANYONE can find and the social media account creation age is 13,NOT 18+ so watch yourselves.Curation of your experience applies to you too and ageism applies to the minors you bully for being triggered over incest more than it does you seeing as you actually have power over them,online AND systematically.Kill the cop in your head-They don't think incest is actually bad either and that's why black people invented acab

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starheirxero · 3 months

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NEXUS AND MOON FINALLY MET!! :D And Ruin is being the cryptic freak he is/affectionate <3

I wanted to point out something really interesting to me-

The last two days of episodes mention a few rather interesting things! Specifically character motivations!

Though subtle, there are lines that tell us a lot about the characters' thought processes, and it really jumped out to me!

In "Lunar gets kicked out", Moon mentions why he wants Lunar to live with them. He feels responsible for them.

Though it seems obvious once you think about it, it tells us not just a lot about Moon and his relationship to Lunar, but Lunar's relationship with Nexus as well.

Moon has a guilty conscience, often thinking of himself as the cause of the problem. This has been a problem for a long time, even prior to his death.

Though he's been incredibly casual, his actions still lay heavy on him, though he has trouble expressing it.

Lunar came from his head. This is where his code developed.

Moon naturally feels responsible for them! Another factor of this could also be his knowledge of being stuck in someone's head.

Its also interesting to note, that Lunar didn't correct or reassure him, instead being upset at the wording! This could mean, that Lunar does feel hurt and left behind, which makes sense!

After all, they died, and when they came back, their big brother was just…gone, sacrificing himself for someone who, in Lunar's eyes, caused much more harm than good.

It actually tells us a lot about their relationship with Nexus as well!!

Nexus knows, where Lunar comes from, and feels the same level of responsibility. He likely felt guilty about Moon's departure as well!

I'm not sure when this happened, but I know Nexus once said, Moon wouldn't have cared about Lunar's death.

This was, of course, his own resentment speaking, but it explains his protectiveness, which was turned up a notch when it came to Lunar!

He's trying to make it up to them.

Lunar's point of view is a whole cane of worms itself- It's been something I've been thinking about for a long time, though I never found the right words for it!

They obviously love Nexus, that much is clear. But they seemed rather avoident of him. It's much different from their relationship with Earth and Sun.

Lunar is a selfish person. They try not to be, and try their best to be empathetic, something they tend to struggle with.

Despite this though, this part of them sometimes peeks through. That's not a bad thing, of course, it makes their character human, and honestly really fun!

Point is, this especially happens around Nexus.

A good example being the Dazzle episodes with those two.

Lunar is a lot more demanding towards him in them, and their little moments of the "sibling dynamic", seem rather tense, much different from the joking atmosphere they usually have around their other siblings. Nexus seems genuinely hurt by Lunar's lack of interest, not even bothering with a simple thank you.

And honesty? It makes sense.

Lunar's perspective on the situation is honestly so fascinating to me!

The tension started, when Eclipse came back.

However, even though they were angry at being babied, something that makes a lot more sense now with Nexus' guilt involved, that wasn't what set them off.

Instead, it started going down hill once Nexus made a deal with Eclipse, and thought of letting him live.

Because Moon had seen everything.

He has seen the dents marking his own metal, inflicted upon him by Eclipse to hurt Lunar.

He knows about Lunar's fear and discomfort, when it comes to Sun's glow feature.

He heared Lunar's thoughts, his doubts, once mentioning, that Lunar can't exactly hide things from him.

Hell, it's been established, that Lunar could see Moon's memories, so theres a likelyhood of the reverse being possible as well.

Moon even brought them to Solar's dimension, for the sake of closure, knowing their time with Eclipse was still eating them up inside.

He should know the pain inflicted on them. Yet he doesn't, because this isn't Moon.

This is Nexus. A replacement. A new person, wearing their brother's face and pretending to be him.

This isn't their older brother anymore. This isn't the guy, who they ran to, when they couldn't take the abuse anymore.

This isn't the person, that took them in. This isn't the brother, that gave them a home. He's not the one, that tried to encourage their interests, or scolded Sun when he accidentally made them cry.

No, this brother is long gone, sacrificing himself for a killcode who hasn't brought anything but misery.

Because Lunar doesn't know about KC's change of heart, or his regret.

In Lunar's eyes, Killcode is nothing but the monster, that caused psychological warfare to his brother, and forced them out of Moon's head.

Of course, there's going to be resentment towards Moon.

"Why would you leave me behind, and at the mercy of my personal demon, for someone who caused us harm?"

And naturally, this resentment would fall upon Nexus as well.

But it only really started to rear its ugly head, when he spared Eclipse.

Because this is the painful moment, that truly paints Nexus a different person.

A replacement, a stranger in a loved ones body.

A reminder of what they lost.

And they know, they are in the wrong.

They know the moment, that they acknowledge Eclipse's death, caused by their own hands, was a mistake.

But they are selfish. They are selfish, and they cannot help but put themself first. They cannot help, but put their own feelings first.

Holy shit, I did not expect to write a whole paragraph-

I needed to get this out of my system though- Lunar is like an insect to me, affectionately! I need to study them under a microscope-

That being said, this also plays into Nexus' development!

In "Moon and Nexus meet", Nexus says some pretty interesting things, mentioning, that Dark Sun is the only one who enjoys what he makes, the only one, who let's him do what he wants to.

This tells us, that Nexus truly did feel like a replacement for Moon.

He felt like he needed to be someone else, pretend to be something he's not.

He needed to be Lunar and Sun's lost brother. He needed to be Earth's reliable, big brother, when, technically, he existed last.

There were too many expectations on him, both from the people around him, and also himself. He likely built up a lot of resentment as well, and now he's letting it all flow out. A bit of this resentment could be heared, when Lunar did not give him that single thank you.

There's definitely more in play here, but I think, this has been eating him up for a long time, long before Solar died. However, Solar's death made him realize, that he can't be Moon, no matter, how hard he tries.

Nexus never truly had an identity of his own, instead being pushed into someone else's.

And of course, there's Eclipse. It always comes around to him, it seems-

I think, the last two MGAFS episodes give us quite the insight into his moral code.

And interestingly enough, it's incredibly similar to Ruin's!

If it's for the greater good, it doesn't matter, who gets hurt.

It doesn't matter, if FC is in pain and relives a traumatic experience, as long as the havoc wrecking ghost gets destroyed.

It doesn't matter, if Puppet has to die, if it means, keeping the multiverse alive.

It doesn't matter, who I hurt, because the star can do anything, and I will create an utopia.

It's such an interesting, morally grey point of view!!

-Stardust

YEYAYEYSYWYESYES!!!!!!!!! I GET EXACTLY WHAT YOU MEAN ACTUALLY I'VE BEEN PICKING UP ON THAT TOO

AND YOUR WHOLE RAMBLE ABOUT LUNAR N MOON N NEXUS YEAH!!!!!!!!!!! I DON'T HAVE PRODUCTION ADDITIONS I'M JUST NODDING SO FURIOUSLY!!!!! I had almost totally forgot about the whole "not even a thank you" with Lunar and Nexus and now that you've reminded me of it, I realize just how long this has been building up for!!!!

It's so many layers of sad to me too because neither of them are necessarily in the wrong. Lunar was mourning where Moon used to stand and Nexus was trying to be someone he literally couldn't be and it just... clashed. No way around it.

And yesyes like u said with Lunar and Moon too!! There's a lotta unaddressed bitterness from the fact Lunar woke up after death and Moon had just up and died to someone Lunar still thought of as a Pretty Shitty Guy!!! And even just unaddressed stuff from before they died, it's just. a lot.

There's so much turmoil between the lunar models and its just awuagahgh it fucks me UP.

And Eclipse's morals yesyesyes!!! They are awfully Ruin-like aren't they?!?!! I wonder if that's something to do with them both being eclipsed models or if it's something with how they were both brought up or if maybe Eclipse's are so Ruin-like now bc that's who made him or whatever yk..... Exactly like u said it's such a fascinating case of grey morality wohoo!!!!! ^_^

#asks #anon #stardust anon #ur ramble abt lunar n nexus reminded me of a post one of my mutuals loving-delusions drew a whike ago too #about when Lunar first came back and Nexus just... didn't click with them like Moon would have if he was there #and i think about it a Loaht #these got dayum robots........ bursts into tears forever #the sun and moon show #sun and moon show #tsams #tsbs #long post

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