#I identified so much with his talk about asexuality

[changingplumbob]

Foster Household: Chapter 9, Part 8

CW: Mental Health Struggles - Guide to content warnings

Chad: How are you today Carson

Carson: Not good. I mucked up at school

Chad: Oh? It’s not exam season is it

Carson: No. I just... I was painting and Ariadne came to talk to me and then the bell rang and all my intrusive thoughts started up and she didn’t finish what she was saying. She probably thinks I’m a rude idiot

Chad: Carson, remember how we talked about mind reading?

Carson: Sort of. It’s like imagining what another person is thinking

Chad: Yep. It’s also a notoriously unreliable train of thought. There’s no way for us to know what someone else is thinking

Carson: Unless we ask?

Chad: Exactly. So while it might be easy to imagine that everyone is thinking the worst of us, it doesn’t make it true. How have you found talking to her when the intrusive thoughts are more quiet?

Carson: Good. Really good. I held her hands and it felt great

Chad: Have you read up on asexuality at all?

Carson: Oh I have and it was good! Like just... exactly what I feel and think has a name. It was... validating. Yeah, validating. I don’t know how touch averse I am, I guess I’ll find out with time

Chad: I’m glad to hear that. Is there anything else you want to discuss before we get to today’s workshop?

Carson: No I’m good

Chad: Great. So last time was all about identifying your symptoms and thoughts. Today we’re going to revise that and discuss some ways to apply reasoned arguments to those thoughts

After he had finished with Chad, Carson hoped on the ferry home and gave his mum a call.

Carson: Hey Mum, my session is all finished. Do you need me to grab anything on the way home

Kayleigh: Oh sweetie I’m sending the new address to your phone

Carson: New address?

Kayleigh: YES! The movers came while you were at school and we’re all set up

Carson: So strangers were touching my stuff? Mum do you know how many germs they could have left?

Kayleigh: We got you some brand new stuff to, don’t worry. You’re going to love it. If you want to clean anything I can help, okay?

Carson worried all the way to the new house. People touching his stuff? When he got there he was pleased to see there were no internal stairs though, much safer. Kayleigh showed him his room and while he was apprehensive he couldn’t deny that his mum had done a good job of preserving his things. Once he was settled Kayleigh left him to do his homework. The light here was much nicer to, but he’d probably have to be careful for mold with his room sitting above the water. Could sharks break through floors like Lachrymose Leeches if they smelled food on him?

Harvey: How’d your appointment go? Are you liking Chad

Carson: Yeah he’s really chill. Helps me not feel so stressed

Kayleigh: I’m sorry we didn’t give you a heads up about the move but we didn’t want you to make yourself sick with worry before we were here

Carson: *sighs* It’s not cool mum

Harvey: It wasn’t just her, we decided together. Be mad at both of us if you are

Carson: Do sharks break through floors?

Kayleigh: I don’t think so but if you want to know I’m sure your sister knows

Harvey: She is a marine biologist

Carson: Yeah I might do that

Kayleigh: And we’re hiring a maid. They’ll come every weekday and clean however much of your room and bathroom you want

Harvey: You’re so smart sugar

Carson: Oh watcher, could you wait until I’m out of the room before kissing? Yeesh

Our first visitor was eldest child Charlie!

Harvey: You found us!

Charlie: Too easily. The paparazzi are going to find you here you know

Harvey: As if, I don’t think they know where Sulani even is. Come play chess?

Charlie follows her dad to the back porch, gives her mum a kiss on the cheek hello, and sets down to play. Harvey however is not a great player and the game is soon over with Charlie the victor.

Kayleigh: Alright my turn

Charlie: You think you can win

Kayleigh: I taught you how to play remember

Charlie: Yeah with a long gap and more kids in the middle

Kayleigh: I’ve been tuning my skills for promotion, you’ll see

Indeed Charlie does. Although she does her best to distract her mum during the game with claims of spotting sea monsters in the distance, Kayleigh is the final victor of the night.

Previous ... Next

[chronicbeans]

Queerplatonic Alastor x Reader Headcanons

Hehe my plan of writing headcanons for various Aroace-spec identity Alastor headcanons has begun. This one is with a cupioromantic and asexual Alastor in mind. I haven't seen enough of them, and as they say! "If you want it done right, you gotta do it yourself."

TW: Frustrations regarding romantic identity, complete unawareness of certain LGBTQ+ topics (my man's from the 1920's, he's almost completely in the dark), slight yandere behavior? (I feel he's just obsessive by default, regardless of the relationship type)

• So, this man has never necessarily identified himself with any sort of LGBTQ+ labels. Back in his day, there weren't any terms to use for being asexual or aromantic. At least, not any that he knew of. He's always been comfortable with his sexuality, though! His main thought process was always "I'll probably find someone that I'm attracted to at some point, and if I don't, that's alright." That thought process has also followed him down to Hell, and stayed the same for all these years.

• However... Whilst he's very comfortable with his sexuality... His romantic feelings are very complicated, now. He's always desired to have one, and he's very confused as to why he hasn't felt any romantic attraction, yet. It makes sense that someone who wants a romantic relationship to be able to feel romantic attraction, yes? He's very much in the dark to the complexities of how these things really work, mostly due to him being from the 1920s-30s. He's caught up on slang and technology, but he hasn't bothered to keep up with sexualities and romantic identities, as he doesn't think about them much.

• So, does he ask any more modern demons and sinners for help? Ha! No. He's too prideful, and simply assumes that there probably isn't much of a difference in knowledge on romantic attraction as compared to his day. Yes, he's aware that there's way more identities for sexualities. People talk about them often, and he hears terms thrown around here and there as he walks through Hell. He never hears anything in regards to romance, though. It's simply not talked about as often, from his experience. So, he's completely in the dark. If anything, he's probably completely unaware that there are identities for romantic attraction.

• He does what he can to cope. This whole situation is very frustrating for him. However, at the same time, he thinks that it shouldn't be so frustrating. So, it's embarrassing to him, and he doesn't tell anyone about it. Instead, he does what he believes everyone who is single and ready to mingle does: reading romance novels. More specifically, he flips to parts where said attraction is described, or little scenarios that he wants is going on. Restaurant dates, walking through the park, dancing, holding hands and cuddling. Those sorts of things! Things nobody would ever expect someone as unhinged as him would want...

• The most frustrating part, however, is that he feels he should already be feeling such an attraction to you. You, being his most close friend. You're the one he trusts with certain secrets, one of the few people he doesn't mind touching him unprompted (besides, say, Niffty), and probably the only person he lets his smile down around. Though, he rarely does so, as he doesn't want to worry you. Unlike Niffty, who he sees as having a more familial feeling towards, he sees you as a close friend. His closest friend, but just a close friend, which frustrates him to no end.

• It takes him a long time to even think of mentioning it to someone. However, when he does, he'd feel too awkward to bring it up to you. So, he decides to speak to Charlie about it! After all, she has one of the more "modern" relationships. So, she probably also knows something about whatever is going on with him! And after the long and grueling process of talking to her? He comes out even more frustrated than before. Being unable to feel romantic attraction, but still want romance? Cupioromantic? It is all so confusing. However, he won't question it. He's clearly out of his zone, and he was horribly wrong when assuming the world of romance hadn't progressed...

• You, however, are his most trusted friend. His closest friend. So, he decides to waste no time in deciding to propose an idea to you. He's heard of these things called "queerplatonic relationships", and his understanding is that they are like friendships, but with some more traditionally romantic interactions involved. Which, whilst his understanding of the nature of queerplatonic relationships may be a bit off, he's trying his best. Once you explain it a bit further, emphasizing that they're closer relationships than friendships, but not romantic and can vary widely in affectionate interactions, he is immediately is set on trying to start one with you. Luckily, though, you agree rather quickly.

• Despite him wanting many of your interactions and ways of showing affection to be more traditionally romantic, such as cuddling or going out on friendly dates, he won't cross any boundaries. Both because you're his closest, most prized relationship with another person, and because he can't think of many other people who would even be willing to enter such a relationship with him if he ever asked. Not that he'd want to ask anyone else. There's a reason why he immediately went to you. It's hard for him to describe it, though. Despite being a man of words, whenever he tries to explain why he feels like you are the perfect person for him to enter this queerplatonic relationship with, he stumbles heavily.

• His little ideal for this relationship is, essentially, the types of things he's read in the romance novels he has. Sure, a little bit of a twisted version of it, but at it's core it's the same. He wants to cuddle in a nice, safe, and warm room (while there's probably the screams of an extermination going on the background). He wants to go to restaurants (this man's a cannibal so check your food). He wants to do the cheesy move of handing you red roses and candy as a gift (do not ask how he was able to buy such an expensive brand, or where the two large, heavy trash bags came from or what they are filled with).

• He's going to be very, VERY protective of you. Almost, if not completely to an obsessive degree. He knows how Hell is. People want power, and he's powerful, and you are close to him. He's sure many people are going to go after you, in order to get to him. So, your little relationship is going to be as well protected of a secret as it can be, at first, until he believes he can properly protect you from any danger. And after the secret is out, he's going to be right by your side the entire time. Literally. Whenever he can be, he's next to you. Nobody, except maybe Vox or another pesky overlord, is going to try to hurt you as long as he is there. Even then, he could completely destroy them, anyways!

[gabessquishytum]

Hob thinking Dream is asexual because he never dates or shows interest in anyone, meanwhile Dream has been in love with Hob for 20 years. 😭😭

- 🚒

I love this because like. Hob could totally not be wrong! Maybe Dream IS ace. But he's still been in love with Hob for 20 years... and Hob is a himbo who may have completely understood how asexuality works.

Look, when he first learned about ace people, he didn't really get it. Hob is very much allo and finds it a little difficult to understand. But he had a friend in his university's pride group who was ace, and they explained it to him. The thing is, they were very much asexual in a sex repulsed, only interested in platonic relationship kind of way. And Hob never got the memo that not all ace people feel like that.

And Hob really really cares about Dream, who has been his best friend since high school, so he wants to respect and be fully supportive of any way that Dream may feel or identify. Having applied his own form of logic and decided that Dream must be ace, he does everything he can to respect his friend. And that means... not bringing up the fact that Hob loves him and really really wants to have a lot of nasty sex with him. Cause Dream would obviously not want that. Right?

Now. Hob is not entirely wrong. Dream does identify somewhere within the spectrum of asexuality. He thinks he might be demisexual, but he's never actually talked about it. What he does know is that there is only one person in the world that he wants to date and do sex things with, and that's Hob. Unfortunately he assumes that Hob (who screws pretty much anything with a pulse but has never tried to screw Dream) must not be attracted to him.

They're both their own brand of stupid, basically.

How does this ultimately resolve? They end up going to a local Pride event together. Hob sees a tent with the ace flag and heads over - he is a Supportive Friend. He's hoping they might be selling pins or flags or something. Instead, he ends up seeing a poster which briefly highlights a number of identifies which fall under the umbrella of asexuality. By the time Dream finds him, Hob is having a small crisis, being comforted by one of the volunteers, who is also gently explaining to him that yes, some ace people like relationships and sex.

All of this means that after 20 years of knowing each other, Hob and Dream finally have to have a conversation about what they both want. The volunteer hands them some condoms, just in case, but both silly boys are more interested in gazing into each other's eyes adoringly!

And they may be using the condoms later... But Hob doesn't really mind. He'll take Dream any way he can get him, forever. No taking it back <333

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

going to format this like a reddit post because it’s the only way. i (transmasc) don’t know if i’m sexually attracted to the girl (transfem) im having sex with. i’ve known for a while that i’m asexual and fuck for fun, and when i see my friend who i’m fucking, i don’t have any immediate overwhelming desire to have sex with her, unless we’re like, in the moment yknow? like i totally forget that it’s even an option bc i could just sit there and talk to her for hours as my friend bc i love (platonic) her dearly and we have a lot of stuff in common. my only quip is that like, is that sexual attraction ???? being in her bed and having our hands on each other and kinda feeling it then? but not at other times? is sexual attraction constant?? maybe im bisexual and aromantic. or maybe i’m regular bisexual and i just dont like romantic relationships. makenzie why are human minds so goddamn difficult to parse the emotions of? i want to be her friend but im confused by my emotions towards her. how am i consistently having sex with someone im not literally sexually attracted to? and liking it? i mean that kinda has to be sexual attraction right? idk. help girl (gender neutral)

hi anon,

have a seat. drink some water. take a deep breath. we're wildly overthinking this.

what you call yourself - asexual, aro bi, bi but not into romance, whatever - that doesn't actually matter.

here are the things I'm worried about here: are you feeling at all pressured or coerced here? given the choice would you want to stop having sex with this person? do you feel comfortable setting boundaries and saying no when you have sex? you don't need to be overcome with raw sexual yearning for your sexual buddy, but do you enjoy and look forward to having sex with her? is this a positive experience for you?

it's fine to have sex even if you don't walk around thinking about it drooling like a horny cartoon wolf, whether it's because you're asexual or just allosexual without a particularly vigorous sex drive. (the line between those things can be pretty blurry and is pretty up to you to define, by the way.) sex can be fun and feel great; it's fine to want to do that even if you don't have a longing in your loins for it.

think of it this way? I don't particularly like most vegetables, but I like how my body will feel when I eat them, so I make a point of doing that as much as I can. and when I cook them they'll usually come out pretty tasty, and I'll enjoy or at least fell neutral about them. and still doesn't mean I like vegetables, or at least I don't particularly identify as someone who likes vegetables, but I did. eat those vegetables.

the sex is vegetables.

I can't tell you if this is sexual attraction. but also it doesn't matter very much as long as you're being safe and having fun.

[gor3sigil]

Little things about being transmasc and/or a trans man:

As trans men and/or transmasc, we always are told to "do better" than cis men, and at the same time to conform to the patriarchal model of masculinity (white, able bodied, strong, thin, necer show emotions etc) to be seen as men/masc.

But you have to understand that some trans men don't want to perform that type of masculinity or CAN'T altogether.

Furthermore, our sexual orientations are often weaponized against us. If we love men, we're called slurs or in more feminist spaces. we're told that we're just women with extra steps, and if we love women, we're asked why we can't just be lesbians or told that we are doing patriarchy all over again. And if you dare to identify gay, you're told that no gay men like p*ssies, and if you dare to identify as a lesbian, you can't because no lesbians like men. And that is without considering the very broad sexuality/romantic spectrum, where your transness is basically a weapon too (aromantic ? Yeah, figure, you're trans and confused. Bi ? Yeah, figure, you're trans and can't decide. Asexual ? Yeah, figure, you're trans or WORSE you're afab and traumatized and so on and so forth).

Gender nonconforming trans men/transmascs are relentlessly called trenders within the community or asked why they even bother to transition. In the outside world, we are often read as a threat and assaulted because of it. But if you are gender conforming, you'll have smirky cis women tell you how you just fantasised about being a Big Strong Man and are just matrixed by patriarchy or too traumatized to live as a woman.

Want to transition medically ? Oh, but T is a BAD hormone that does BAD thing like make you gain WEIGHT and gives you ACNE and makes you GROSS. On the weight topic I could write a book about the horrible fatphobia within the community because I kid you not, I have been a girl teen with EDs who hung out in pr* an* forums and I've seen some shit in transmascs groups and passing tips that have a real resemblance to what I saw back then. Same for transmascs/trans men fitness groups.

Don't want to transition medically ? Lol theyfab. Like so much a woman. Very lady like with a bonus of bringing the movement down.

When it comes to inside the community, we can't talk about specific issues without being shushed, intersex transmascs, and trans men face a LOT of hardships and are insulted. I remember a friend of mine who is an intersex trans man receiving death threats and got told to [redacted] himself when he talked about his experiences as an intersex trans man BY TRANS PEOPLE.

Bipoc trans men and transmascs are always confronted to the white standards of passing coupled with the rampant racism within and outside of the community.

And one thing I can not not bring up: I think a lot of people forget that we can't mourn our dead. Why ? Because these past years, transmascs and trans men have been forgotten from TDOR lists. I remember seeing Twitter threads from trans men adding them because we don't even KNOW when someone has died or they are deemed as women and the death is treated like a feminicide. And it has been a constant.

We can basically never please no matter what we do.

That's my 2 cents on the transandrophobia because I feel like it needs to be said. If you still think that trans men and transmasc individuals don't face specific issues, think again.

[dingodad]

personally the vriska calling him a pedophile bit wasnt out of place for me. Canonically vriska doesnt shy away from saying that scratch is a sexual predator, she does state outright to his face that he gets off on manipulating little girls in the comic.

i think "would it be in character for vriska to say that" and "does it make sense in the context of the story for her to say that" are two subtly but crucially different questions, though.

like, on the one hand: it has always been textually clear that doc scratch is not LITERALLY a pedophile. he's a completely asexual organism. by using that word to describe him, you're making the subtextual textual. and this kind of "saying the quiet part out loud" is something the HICU have done very deliberately since they took the helm of hs2; they are intimately aware, i think, of the fact that they are fans in charge of deconstructing homestuck for the entertainment of other fans, and that in service of that aim sometimes you need to be willing to have mature discussions out in the open. a lot of the time this has worked for them quite well, especially in terms of getting old readers back on board with a story which has in the past been overly subtle to the point of excruciating boredom. but sometimes it teeters close to the edge of "characters talking like they're fully aware they're getting therapy", and i think this example leans somewhat toward the latter. like, is there really anyone reading hs2 at this point who doesn't already have some understanding that scratch is a predator? who exactly did it serve to make that already blatant comparison that much more overt?

on the other hand... i get the impression that vriska is actually aware of this distinction, on some level? like emphasising the fact that scratch is a child predator is almost a sort of shield for her. the name of vriska's game in this chapter is minimisation; while it's super cool and heroic to admit that part of your tragic backstory involves a sick spider monster and a badass lady pirate, by trying to paint scratch as nothing more than a pathetic kiddy fiddler what she's really saying is that because he never actually molested her then she was never really abused, that she was never really a victim and therefore he was never actually a significant presence in her life at all. that's how she lives with it, by role playing as the predator to forget the fact that she was ever prey.

i think what i question about this is possibly that vriska would even know to use that word at all? writing dialogue that actually feels authentically like stuff trolls would say is another thing i think hs2 has had a rough time with ("that is a completely normal human sentence"?). the gay joke in the tavros chapter was funny because it had been a long time since we heard caliborn and jake do the same gag but it feels like they tried to capture that same energy with vriska calling tavros a "pussy" in this chapter and it fell flat. and it felt just as unnatural for a troll to say the word "pussy" as it did for her to say the word "pedophile". i think what makes alternia and its traumatic knock-on effects so effective is that it's often more insidious than it is explicit; trolls barely have the language to describe all the institutionalised neglect and abuse that is happening around them all the time because to them it's just how the world works! yeah sollux has that line about sex offenders and schools, but i think that basically serves to illustrate my point, because for the most part we all seem to understand that trolls don't have what we would be able to identify as "school" either: sexual abuse and education are concepts that, in the world of homestuck, exist entirely in the abstract; tropes to be evoked but not things that ever actually happen.

that being said, alternia is designed to reflect the structure of homestuck as a whole, and the reason alternia doesn't have sex offenders or schools is because homestuck in general does not explicitly concern itself with these topics. we understand that escaping homestuck and settling down on Earth C means settling down in the "real world", replacing the threat of time-travelling demons with real struggles and real problems, and as a continuation of the homestuck epilogues hs2 naturally IS going to continue to touch on sex and politics and all the other stuff that was delegated mostly to the subtextual in the original comic. i think the structure of this chapter even kind of alludes to this; tavros and erisol beckon vriska to relax for a moment and play childish games with them like she used to do when she was a kid on alternia, but by choosing to forge on ahead with her personal growth vriska is immediately confronted with the fact that becoming an adult is NOT like a webcomic, it's NOT all allegories and RPG battles; it can be sick and it can be hurtful and it can stop you right in your tracks just as you thought you were "making progress" toward "winning".

i just feel that by having vriska apply Earth C vocabulary to an Alternian experience right off the bat, we've skipped over a key part of her transition from homestuck to the real world. would this chapter have been any easier to stomach if it had been about vriska coming to grips with the fact that scratch was a predator in the first place? no, of course not LOL. i think my gripe here might literally just be with the word choice. like i believe the writers have it in them to express what they were trying to express here in a much more interesting way than simply having vriska say "lol he's a pedophile". yes, addressing something literally that has only ever been mentioned before in symbols and whispers is part of the impact of this update, but i don't think that has to come at the expense of the dialogue actually feeling like it belongs in the mouths of these characters

[arany-studio]

Are Kanej asexuals?

While we celebrate LGBTQIA+ Pride in the Grishaverse, let's discuss a matter that is not always well understood, but often spoken about in the fandom - are Kanej asexuals?

Trigger warning for talk of sexuality, trauma, PTSD and past sexual abuse.

According to asexuals.fandom.com, the asexuality spectrum is an umbrella term that applies to people who feel little to no sexual attraction and includes such micro labels as asexual, aroace, graysexual, demisexual, aegosexual, apothisexual, fraysexual, aceflux, cupiosexual, orchidsexual or caedosexual. A-spec is a term that can include all of the above.

A little known fact about asexuality is that it is different from libido (or sexual desire). Asexuality is a sexual orientation that relates to attraction, but asexuals can have either high or low libido, which is not directed at anyone in particular. Also, asexuals can have sex for many reasons that are not related to sexual attraction, such as to please their partners, to relax or for pleasure and they are no less asexuals, but it's also important to mention that the majority of people that identify as a-spec do not include sex in their lives.

Asexuality is a spectrum and the opposite of allosexuality, which refers to people who often experience sexual attraction.

An often unknown label under the asexual umbrella is caedosexual.  This includes people who once identified as allosexual, but later on identified on the asexual spectrum because of trauma. It was feared that inclusion of this flag under asexuality would further feed the prejudice that all asexuals are like this because of  trauma, but this has been disproven. Only caedosexuals are so because of trauma, not the other a-specs.

Now let's see what we know about Kanej. Both Kaz and Inej have gone through horrific experiences in their childhood and puberty respectively, and their resulting traumas are affecting how they engage with their sexualities in their teen years. Their desire to heal fluctuates. Sometimes Kaz thinks that Inej could never be truly his and Inej thinks that they might be better off with their armors intact and at other times Inej appreciates that they have tried to be close and wishes they could try again and Kaz fights his demons in order to hold her hand. Fact is, the caedosexuals I have spoken to have said that Kaz and Inej can choose to work towards separating their traumas from their sexualities in the future, or they can choose not to and they are valid either way. So what could be safely said is that Kanej are likely caedosexuals in SoC + CK timeline, although that could change in the future.

But the discussion of whether Kaz and Inej fall under the asexual spectrum is more complex than that and in the fandom you can often find fans arguing either that they provide much needed representation to asexuals or on the contrary, that they are very eager to heal and have an intimate relationship. But let's not forget that libido is different from attraction and there are many asexuals with high libido, so the question here is what type of attraction do Kaz and Inej experience?

The media that we consume is largely amatonormative, meaning that it assumes that all humans pursue love of a romantic and sexual nature, but a less known fact is that attraction can take many more forms than we were led to believe by such media. Attraction is sexual when a person wants to have sex with another, romantic when they desire to engage in romantic activities, aesthetic when they think someone is beautiful, sensual when they desire non-sexual physical closeness (such as nonromantic cuddles and kisses), platonic when they want to be friends with someone or queerplatonic (alterous) when someone desires a committed relationship with a partner that is in between platonic and romantic in nature. Other types of attraction are familial, emotional, intellectual or spiritual. 

For example, it is quite clear that Inej doesn't feel spiritual attraction towards Kaz's lack of faith in saints, but she does feel intellectual attraction towards his brilliant mind. And though Kaz might cover his feelings under "economic" attraction (joking), the question here is under what type of attraction do Kaz's and Inej's feelings for each other fall under. Fact is, if allosexuals view Kaz and Inej through their lense they can easily think that they feel sexual and romantic attraction for each other, but if asexuals view them from their lense instead, what Kanej feel might very well be queerplatonic, sensual or aesthetic attraction that for one or both of them isn't sexual or romantic in nature. For example some people view Kaz's interest in Imogen as a challenge and his desire to have an intimate connection with Inej as wanting to please her and they argue that Kaz has been "content" on his own for so long, plotting his revenge and Barrel dominion, that he might well be asexual or demisexual. Many other people view Inej's famous line "I'll have you without armor" to be related to trust solely, whereas others view it as being both about intimacy and trust. And let's not forget the many voices that appreciate Kanej for showing how people can love each other deeply even when they don't have sex. The truth is that we don't know for sure where Kanej fall on the spectrum of attraction, the text is beautifully vague in that regard, but the many varied interpretations about Kanej show that what meets the eye is not always a person's inner experience.

To sum up, the one thing that is almost certain about Kaz and Inej is that in book time, their traumas influence their experience of sexuality, likely setting them under the a-spec umbrella as caedosexuals. This may or may not change in the future, depending on their desire and capacity to heal, but Kanej are valid either way. As regards to how Kanej might identify were they to heal from their traumas, many interpretations about the way they feel attraction or lack of it are possible, setting them as either allosexual, demisexual or asexual. The beauty of book Kanej is that they are written in such a subtle way that they provide representation to a wide range of people and that's why we love them so much!

[enbyfallenfromthedeadstars]

[ CW mention of sex context : rosekiller headcanon ]

⟡ ⟡ ⟡

i love horny-for-Barty! Evan Rosier i love asexual! Evan Rosier

i wanted these two headcanons to coexist so let me present you :

demiromantic! Evan Rosier & demisexual! - acespike! Evan Rosier

Evan Rosier who never felt any kind of things for other people than Bartemius Crouch Jr. because he hasn't been this close and never trusted anyone this much – but his sister – before.

Evan Rosier who all his life believed he was broken before discovering that asexuality and aromantism are a thing, and then had a full identity crisis when he started to be attracted to his best friend.

Evan Rosier who cried in the beggining because he felt like he'll never suceed to truly know himself and at first thought he had to leave a label he felt confortable with.

Evan Rosier who was so confused of what he was feeling in his mind and body when he was around Barty that he had to ask Pandora (not a great help her being aroace! as well) for explanations / help.

Evan Rosier who started having sexual dreams (exclusively with Barty), and honestly had no idea what to do with it, it was just so strange to him.

Evan Rosier who couldn't take his eyes off Barty and looked like a fucking stalker at any time of the day (which his best friend foud kind of hot tbh)

Evan Rosier who loved how their relationship was so flirty everytime that it became unclear to everyone (sometimes even themselves lmao) because it gave the impression that his new, weird and undwieldy feelings are some kind of joke, which made the situation way less stressful for him.

Evan Rosier who didn't feel like he missed an incredible thing all his life nor was sad that he hadn't experienced it sooner, but simply accepted this romantic love as an addition to his platonic ones and was grateful for it.

Evan Rosier who struggled so much to deal with these violent spikes of sexual need at first that he turned red and started sweating in the middle of classes or common room or lunch or whatever, which amused Barty a lot.

Bartemius Crouch Jr. who respected all of this (despite the fact that he constantly wanted him), gave space and time to his lover to discover himself, was still always physically near to him by being on his lap, agressive cuddling, having a hand in his hair or on his thigh... but never tried anything pro-sexual with him outside of his – kinda rare – sudden spikes, and enjoyed every wild and sinful seconds of it when it happened.

Bartemius Crouch Jr. who took matter into his own hands and gave – practical – sex ed classes to his boyfriend (with Reggie on the side reminding them about condoms and STIs while rolling his eyes, yk) but never saw him as a kid nor a late-bloomer and used teasing as a way to be sure of his consent.

Bartemius Crouch Jr. who always looked at Evan lips and ass, almost all day, but didn't dare to initiate the kiss in the beginning out of fear to offense and lose him, and then learned to identify and recognize the peculiar look his lover had when he wanted, when he was dying for some contact with Barty's hands, tongue, neck, pelvis... (this one works so good with non-verbal! Evan as well !)

Bartemius Crouch Jr. who couldn't help but be jealous anytime Evan talked with someone new, even if he perfectly knew what "demisexual" & "demiromantic" mean and how it requires a deep, almost fusional connexion to allow some kind of romantic and sexual feelings.

Rosekiller which, contrary of what other classmates might said, didn't "fixed" or "forced" Evan into anything, but was simply made out of ideal conditions for his aspec identity to fully revealed itself.

Rosekiller which still made out of two potential dangerous and weird murderers freaks in the sickest relationship, builded on possessiveness, bones collection, blood necklaces, bites and hexes.

Of course, have to be correlated with demiromantic! & hypersexual! Bartemius Crouch Jr. ! Barty who, contrary at Evan, never felt broken and simply enjoyed, needed meaningless flirt with everyone all the time because it only leads to sex and makes him feel alive and important. Barty who was kinda deconcerted when he realized he loved Evan, having never really thought it could happen to him. Barty who fucked twice as much men & women to be sure he didn't felt such things with them, and had to face facts. Barty who was terrified of that, of love, of how weak he can become because of it. Barty who decided to give it a try despite it. Barty who flirted with his best friend so hard and so obviously it turned into a sort of joke. Barty who used it to touch him. Barty who, unconsciously, stopped seducing other persons, which made others tilt about the situation. Barty who decided, after having kissed Evan at a party while being drunk, that it was him and not another. Evan who thought exactly the same.

[txttletale]

Hi, i dont quite understand the earlier points about the allosexual term!

The way i always understood it all, straight to gay is a spectrum, so would cis and being NB or trans or genderfuild be, and same for ace to allo. As in, demisexuality would be on the gradient between asexual and allosexual. And therefor the term allosexual would hold meaning by sheer ability to talk about the concept of asexuality with more nuance?

I also saw someone in the replies of that post posit that the 'other side' of asexuality would be 'straight, bi, pan, gay, etc' instead of using allosexual as a descriptive term. Whats your take on that? Im asking because, a lot of ace (im using this to include any experience of attraction deviating from the socially expected, so also demi) ppl i know identify as hetero, gay, bi etc as well. As in, an ace person who may lack the ability to feel sexual atttaction to others on sight alone, may still prefer one gender over another if they're still inclined to romantic bonds.

Plus, a lot of asexuals arent sex repulsed either, and the term is purely used to describe an 'aberration' in how ace ppl experience attraction? Therefore, wouldn't allosexual be a helpful destinction?

(Sorry for the long ask, im just curious and like how much thought is usually apparent in your answers here)

essentially, i think where you're wrong is the idea that cis-trans or straight-gay are spectrums. i obviously believe that sexuality and gender, the phenomenons, the actual matters of people kissing and fucking and self defining and being -- those are all mutable and contextual and often defy clear legibility, permeable and impossible to strictly taxonomise. however 'straight' and 'cis' are not just neutral descriptors of another point on a spectrum, but strictly delineated boxes from which any deviation is punished. someone who's gender fluid or gender questioning isn't 'part cis' or 'midway between cis and trans' -- they have deviated outside the acceptable bounds of cishet social performance. & the reason these categories are so cleanly delineated is that unlike other categories they have entire hegemonic social apparatuses -- chiefly homophobia & transphobia -- dedicated to patrolling those descriptive borders of cisness and heterosexuality and brutally punishing anyone crossing them. & the same is simply not true of 'allosexuality' -- there is no such socially enforced category. when ace people face aphobia they are being punished for failing to perform heterosexuality, not just sexuality in general.

[philsmeatylegss]

Can I talk about Cat King because no one else will???

I haven’t finished the show yet so this might be wrong or age like milk

I could talk about his role in the story for hours. Tbh I overly identify with Edwin because I’m gay with a lot of problems in the past and Edwin’s historical typical internalized homophobia already makes a history nerd like me giddy with glee. And Cat King easily can be written off as a gag character, which I do think is part of his purpose, but he also represents the aspect of this story regarding Edwin’s sexuality not solely being sexual, but also still being sexual. As in obviously Edwin sexually fantasizes about men, but there’s much more than just that. That implication, acknowledging the fact, feeling free to tell Charles and the others, acting on that, just day to day life. Edwin had gotten by for thirty years ignoring his sexuality until cat king came along. Edwin acknowledging his sexuality, acting on it, and discussing it (in his own way) is a large part of his character growth which is fully pushed on because of Cat King. I know he’s supposed to be the bad guy, but I genuinely believe he is an anti hero or something along those lines. I think at first it was to just tease Edwin, but it grew into something deeper.

Don’t even get me started on the cuff. It is SO symbolic I could almost cry. It’s a physical representation of how limiting and claustrophobic it is to be in the closet. Specially not being out of the closet to close loved ones. You couldn’t have a closer relationship than the relationship between Edwin and Charles, but it doesn’t seem that way before Edwin comes out. And that’s multiple reasons on both of their parts, but part of it is that complete shut down to that side of himself. People don’t realize how much sexuality plays into day to day life. And Cat King made Edwin realize how much he’s missed out on. And also that he can’t put off his problems forever. Slay relatable.

I think the addition of Crystal and Niko also makes Edwin realize that he needs to at least recognize his sexuality. I think they help him realize how much he is missing out on by not being himself in general, nevertheless outing his sexuality.

And all of this goes back to the cat king!!! It drives me insane no one talks about it!!! There’s also the aspect that, on the surface, cat king is just supposed to represent lust. The difference between his feelings for Monty or Charles is that there’s emotions there while cat king is purely lust and a giggle. But when you think about the story, that’s just not true. When media deals with a character’s sexuality not being straight, it’s usually over sexualized or not acknowledged as anything sexual. Cat king gives that balance to his feelings for Charles. Because being gay is partly explicit. As is being straight, bi, pan, whatever (other than asexuality). Saying you are ___ sexuality is implying that you are sexually aroused by whatever gender(s). And cat king is that reminder while Charles and Monty are the reminder that love and relationships are also part of it. Cat king adds balance that makes Edwin’s character feel way more authentic and actually gay.

I haven’t even gotten to cat king pushing for Edwin to admit why he solves cases. WHY DOES NO ONE TALK ABOUT IT?!?! I was gnawing at the bars of my enclosure during that scene. It is arguably one of the most important scenes of the entire show. And it’s entirely brought on my cat king. Every single time Edwin either decides or is forced to reveal something vulnerable about himself, it’s Cat King!!!! Edwin’s confession that it is about preparing a justification as to how he should be allowed into heaven even though he is gay is such an insanely important moment and I’m gnawing at my enclosure again!!!

I may be studying history, but I’ve always been an English kid at heart and symbolism about religion and childhood trauma brings me to my knees. And Cat King is scratching an itch I’ve had for years that I had no clue was there anD NO ONE IS TALKING ABOUT IT WHILE IT IS DRIVING ME BANANAS.

Anyway, that’s my case for talking about cat king. I just finished episode 4 and it’s gonna be really embarrassing when something happens the next few episodes that completely invalidates all of this

[rwby-encrusted-blog]

Ruby: MMmm-MH! Goooood Morning Yang!

Yang: *Brushing Teeth* M'rn Rbs!

Ruby: You're up bright and early. What's up?

Yang: *Spits in sink* Me and Blakey got a whole day planned-*Gargling & Swishing Mouthwash, Spits* We're gonna go for a walk in the park to get some pictures taken and do a little window shopping, then we're meeting up with her parents for lunch!

Ruby: You've got a whole day planned, Huh! Is there something special about to ... day ...

Ruby checks the calender - wednesday, Febuary 14th.

Valentines day

Ruby: Nonono! Not now! I haven't prepared!

Yang: Sorry Rubes! I gotta get dressed, so unless you wanna see me naked again, you should-

Ruby: I'm going, I'm going!

~~~~~

Ruby: Hey Weiss! Blake and Yang are busy-

Weiss: I have Dates planned Ruby! I'm afraid I can't help you.

Ruby: With- I'm sorry did you say 'Dates' as in Dates Plural?

Weiss: Yes I did.

Ruby: Isn't that kind of-

Penny: Salutations Ruby! I am here to see My Valentines for the day!

Ruby: Penny? You're going out with Weiss?

Jaune: I am too! We're going to be switching on and off throughout the day!

Ruby: What.

Penny: Knowing that you identify as 'Asexual' I inquired what romance felt like to Weiss, who was on her way to ask Jaune on a 'date.' Jaune brought up how Polyamorous relationships were uncommon but plausible, so Weiss agreed to spend her time with us both!

Ruby: ... Oh.

Weiss: Yes, and I still need to finish readying up! Please leave so that I may Dress!

~~~~~

Loud Thumping and groaning may be heard behind Ren and Nora's Door, along with slapping sounds.

Ruby: I dunno why I thought they'd be doing anything else.

~~~~~

Oscar: Hey Ruby! What're you up to?

Ruby: Finding you! Everyone else is busy with Valentines, so I figured "hey, Oscar hasn't seemed interested in anyone, and he know what romance is" so I looked for you so we could have a Totally Platonic hangout. Which, for Valentines day would be weird-

Whitley: *Barging in* Hello my Evergreen~ I brought Cinnamon raisin Oatmeal cookies for my most sweet of sweets~

Oscar: Uuuhh ... Sorry Ruby, I'm kinda busy?

Ruby: ￣へ￣

~~~~~

Ruby: *Knocking on Door* HEY UNCLE QROW!

Robyn: *Wrapped in a towel* Sorry kid, He's busy in the Bathroom.

Ruby: ... i though him and Clover-

Clover: I'm here Too!

Qrow: I got a big heart Kid! Now leave and let me bathe with these guys, or I'll tell them about your seventh brithday!

Clover: Now that I wanna hear!

Ruby: You wouldn't!

Robyn: *Holding Qrow's hand* He Would.

Ruby: ... Got it. Have a nice time. Please leave a sock on your handle next time this happens!

~~~~~

Ruby: ...

Emerald: How do they feel now?

Mercury: *Rubbing his legs, crying Slightly* They feel Real. They feel like they're back.

Ruby: Well That's sweet.

Emerald: We're trying. I'd talk more but concentration-

Ruby: And Merc seems like he needs you, have a nice day.

~~~~~

Ruby: Hey Winter-

Winter: ...

Cinder: *On Winter's shoulder* ...

Ruby: ... I'll be going.

~~~~~

Ruby: Hey Miss Schnee-

Willow: *sweaty and Flushed* Hello Dear! I'm afraid I don't have much time-

Kali: Willow~ We have time for one more round before me and Ghira need to see our Kitten~

Ruby: Just go-

Willow: I can take a break if you need-

Ruby: I'll be fine, i get it-

Willow: Seriously, If you need something-

Ruby: Thank you, but I'm good, all good, go have your fun-

~~~~~

TaiYang: Hey! You've reached the Personal Scroll of Taiyang Xiao Long! At the moment I am pounding someone's ass right now, and Can't reach you! PLease leave a message at the Tone!

Ruby: *Hangs up* Safe to assume that's where Raven is.

~~~~~

Ruby: ... Hey? Hey Torchwick!

Roman: *Sitting at a table at a cafe* Little Red, I'm not in the mood for any of our games today.

Ruby: What do you mean?

Roman: Look, Neo's a free spirit, and on today of all days, she's reveling in Warm bodies rather than cold blood, leaving little ol' me out to dry, just cause the way I get down and Dirty is only ever stylish not sexy.

Ruby: ... yeah, I get that. Everyone I can think of is either being horny or romantic. It's annoying.

Roman: Oh-ho-ho! It seems the little nightmare for all the criminals in Vale is and Ace of Spades, huh?

Ruby: Well ... *Unfurling Crescent Rose as she takes a seat* Wrong Farm tool, but yeah, my flags fly white, gray, Green and Purple.

Roman: ... how about truce for today? I get the feeling if we stay out of each other's trouble our friends and family can have a nice day.

Ruby: No assault, theft from Mom and Pop shops, no murders, no trafficking and no destruction of property.

Roman: ... take off destruction of property.

Ruby: Hostile architecture only.

Roman: *Extending his hand* Deal.

Ruby: *shaking his hand* Sweet.

[i-fucking-hate-ppl]

Hello! I see that you write for Hazbin Hotel, I hope I'm not being a bother but I'd like to request Alastor with a friend/significant other that identifies as non binary. Seeing as he's from a time period where LGBTQ people weren't exactly accepted I wonder what his opinion would be. Would he be homophobic? Or would he be confused/slightly weirded out and need someone to explain to him for him to understand and accept?

You're hardly a bother dearie! I hope you enjoy!

Platonic

He would be confused and most certainly has no clue what you're going on about! Those terms hardly existed in his time, or at least weren't common knowledge, it was all just slurs unfortunately.

Even with his time in hell, he was too busy off doing his.. broadcasts and whatnot to become better educated on the subject.

Once you explain it he will.. still be rather confused but he's quite the polite and proper man, a gentleman really, so he won't ever say anything bad.

Just a "Oh! Well that's.. quite interesting!"

He might say some offensive things from time to time, on accident of course. A small correction is all that's needed.

"Sorry my dear! I wasn't aware!"

And that's that, he'll never say it again.

He tries to be respectful, and tries to avoid bringing it up so he won't offend you. And rather brings his question to random ass people he finds because he doesn't give two fucks about them.

If you start mentioning asexual he'll be like oh hey, that's me! Haha!

Obviously he gets better with time, and it's something you two bond over with a cup of tea.

"And he dared to misgender me, after i politely corrected him! What a prick am I right?"

"Most definitely dear. I could take care of him, if you wish."

"...Uh like bring him soup when he's sick or..."

Or

"A man came onto me on my way back this evening."

"Jesus! I hope he got what he deserved!"

"He most certainly did! I ripped his dick off! Haha!"

"...Good for you? I mean uh, you go!"

Sometimes you're slightly concerned by him..

Romantic

As stated before, confused and has no idea what you are talking about.

Although this time he is more interested, you are his lover after all, he should try to understand to his full extent!

He will ask you many questions, and word them very carefully so he won't upset you. And anything he think may be slightly offensive, well it's back to torturing questioning the information out of homeless people.

"You should have told me sooner dear! It's hardly an issue at all! I have no problem with the community, be a giraffe for all I care!"

"You shouldn't have a problem with the community since you're an ace in the hole, also that's.. a little bit offensive."

"A what now?"

Further explanation needed. He's heard it twice now, tell him.

Once you explain he'll realize that you were most certainly correct! Any sexual attraction towards you is very, very far and few between and most of the time he'd much rather just sit and read a book with you with some jazz playing from a radio in the backround.

He won't treat you any differently than he did before hand. <3

[amazon160]

Can the Hazbin fandom chill tf out for once??

Alastor is aroace and y’all need to get over it: a rant :)

THE VERDICT:

We shouldn’t deny that Alastor is aromantic and asexual. We should acknowledge that there is a spectrum of people in the aroace community that are capable of romantic and/or sexual feelings, but we shouldn’t use it as an excuse to immediately sexualize him and just toss the representation to the side. On the flip side, we can’t go harrassing those who do ship him or simp for him. Me personally, I’m a simp. But seeing how he is I’d rather be in a platonic relationship or simp respectfully from the shadows 👹 But yea we just need to be respectfulonallsidespleasedon’tkillme--

MY THOUGHTS BEHIND IT:

Alastor is aroace. There is a spectrum of people who identify as aroace and still have romantic or sexual feelings, just toned down much more than normal (as I’ve come to understand, at least). HOWEVER. Using that as an excuse to ship Alastor and sexualize him kinda takes away the whole POINT of him being aroace.

I also see people who identify as aroace who are angry with this argument--that using the spectrum excuse takes away from the representation. They’re kinda pissed that people are saying aroace means you have NO feelings WHATSOEVER because a spectrum does, in fact, exist.

A huge part of fandom is shipping. There’s no way around it. This fandom has been shipping Alastor with Charlie since the dawn of time. Does it go against canon Alastor? Absolutely. Is that part of the point and fun of shipping? Yes. But is it disrespectful to his sexuality and the representation? I mean, it sucks. And it’s valid to be annoyed by that.

But it’s not worth harassing people.

I’ve seen a shit ton of harassment over a CRACKSHIP. Yes, I’m talking about RadioApple. There are those who legitimately ship it, but to those who ship because it’s funny, just let them enjoy themselves. And going back to the whole spectrum excuse I’ve been seeing, yes Alastor may be capable of romantic and sexual attraction. But he is the embodiment of “doesn’t give a shit”, so I doubt he would. It’s not gonna stop people, though.

This is an uncomfortable topic since I’m not anywhere near aroace or on the lgbt spectrum. But it’s something I’ve been seeing a lot as I’m in the fandom and it’s something I’ve been meaning to put out there. So am I qualified? I think I am now that I’ve done my research. But whether you think so is entirely up to whoever gave enough of a crap to read this whole thing 😂 I might just post a shortened version of this afterwards.

That was all, I believe. I know the Hazbin fandom’s pretty toxic and always kinda has been (hehe wordplay) but I wanna throw in my penny.

@the-beard-of-edward-teach yo I threw in my penny 🏃‍♀️💨

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

The shorter version: Hey could you talk about stone tops more? Or anything like that, people who like giving but not recieving?

The longer version: I’m sort of going through that process of self discovery, I’ve been meaning to ask about it somehow- basically I am sexually attracted to people (I think??), I get aroused, I enjoy masturbating, even talking with my partner about stuff we could do is arousing to me. I enjoy some submissive kinky stuff. Hell, my boyfriend (transmasc, both of us are) recently let me go down on him and it was like a fucking religious experience, I LOVED it, but I find it really difficult to enjoy anything being done directly to /my/ genitals. Like, I can feel the sensations, and they feel good, but I don’t build any arousal, like I can’t get in the mood? I know I’m not, but I do feel fucked up and broken. Spiritually, I want my boyfriend to rail me into next week, but physically I’m afraid there’s like. Something wrong with me, like,, I don’t work??? Idk. I’ve got major anxiety, I’ve got dysphoria, I guess I always figured it was one of those things. There’s only so many times I can feel Way Too Seen by fanfiction about Noted Asexual, Archivist Jonathan Sims before I start to wonder what exactly they’ve hit directly on the head, if that makes sense. I’m not asking you to Diagnose Me Asexual lmaoo but I was wondering about more like… asexual adjacent things? My boyfriend suggested I look into “service top” too. I… don’t feel like a top? I’m very submissive. But I’ve heard it’s not always top= dom, bottom=sub… how can I be a submissive top?

Sorry this is… so much. It’s really been weighing on me. Even if you don’t feel up to answering this I thank you profusely for the sex ed content you’ve been posting lately. Demystifying sex and promoting sexual health is so incredibly important, and even just what I’ve read from you makes a difference in the agency I feel over my sex life.

hi anon,

weeeeeee!!! this is a fun one.

so, first off, I'm just gonna throw this out there: liking the idea of something - for instance, your boyfriend railing you into next week - is not an innate sign that that's something you'd like in real life. I'll jack off to the idea of getting railed like Thomas the Tank Engine, sure, but in real life vaginal penetration has never felt like much of anything to me + I haaaaAAAAaaaate the idea of doing anything with even a teeny tiny slight chance of getting me pregnant. some stuff is fine to stay in the brain!

if you do ever decide to tentatively explore it with your bf, that's also fine and wonderful, but let's focus on what we know about your likes right now. you don't want to get fucked (awesome) but you like going down (also awesome). none of that means you are or aren't asexual, btw, there are loads of asexuals in the world who love to get railed and hate going down and also feel every possible way about every other possible array of sex acts. you're only asexual if you want to be, keep that in mind.

you're also only stone or a service top or whatever else if you want to be. words exist to be useful, not as an innate ontological truth to discover within yourself. personally I think it's waaaaay more important for people to refine their sense of likes, dislikes, communication, and boundary-setting than finding the exact right word for their particular cup of tea.

as long as we're talking about terminology, let's get into dom/sub and top/bottom. you're absolutely correct that they're not interchangeable, whatever the hooligans on various hellsites would have you believe. dom and sub are terms for power exchange play, when two people enact a power differential in which one partner is consensually given a great deal of control over the other, be it physically, psychologically, financially, or what have you. top/bottom simply refer to who is acting vs who is being acted upon during a sexual act; while some people identify intensely as either a top or a bottom, it's also a simple matter for those roles to switch on a dime depending on what kind of sex you're into. it's completely possible to have sex without designating anyone the top or bottom, and I'd argue that most people have sex without there actually being a dom or sub involved.

so can dom bottom, or a sub top? of course; people can mix and match whatever pieces of sexuality they want in their own explorations. a dom can boss their sub around like a little servant, giving them extremely detailed instructions about exactly how to rail them, and perhaps punish them (in the fun consensual way, obviously) if they fail to meet those expectations and don't get their dom off the way that was wanted. you can, and I cannot possibly emphasize this enough, do whatever you want forever.

a service top, incidentally, is generally considered a separate thing from a dom (which is not to say they can't overlap!) in that a service top isn't always dominating, but is topping because they enjoy getting their partner off in whatever way they like. the overlap of service tops and folks who are stone is notable!

in your particular case I would recommend not worrying so much about which of these terms, if any, are the correct one for you and focus way ore on exploring and playing with your partner to find a rhythm that works well for the two of you. doms, subs, tops, and bottoms all have something useful to teach people about how they like intimacy, but there's no rush to figure out which category, if any, you fit in. just focus on what's fun and feels good to you and toss the rest.

[cinderella-ish]

Fruits Basket Queer Headcanons

The more I watch and read Fruits Basket, the more I get the sense that no one is straight here. Well... almost no one. So, in honor of pride month, here are my queer headcanons for the cast of Fruits Basket!

(Disclaimer that these are my own personal headcanons, obviously nothing official, etc... I try to draw on evidence from the text, but I'll admit I'm occasionally going purely off vibe. Also, I'm bi and genderfluid, so that's the lens I'm bringing to this. I'd love to hear your headcanons, especially if they differ from mine! Enjoy!)

Genderfluid and/or genderqueer: Ayame and Ritsu

I (probably somewhat controversially) think a lot of the gender non-conformity among Fruits Basket characters is just that: gender non-conformity. Momiji is one example; he dresses in girls' clothing (though not "like a girl") until his growth spurt, but it seems important to him to be seen as a man from at least that point forward.

Ritsu is someone whose gender identity and/or nonconformity really should've been explored more in the manga - as written, it feels like Ritsu's exploration of gender was viewed as something he'd grow out of, rather than a search for understanding himself. He doesn't really seem to mind being identified as either male or female, though he obviously feels a lot of shame about his comfort with wearing women's clothes (though no one around him when we meet him really seems to mind, which is nice-- I also appreciate that Ritsu was shown to have friends who adore him outside of the Sohmas). Anyway, the fact that he seems okay with being referred to as both a man and a woman is the entire basis for this headcanon.

Ritsu also idolizes Ayame, and I think part of this stems from Ayame's own security in his non-traditional gender presentation. We don't really get a lot of Ayame's thoughts on gender, despite his line of work, but he strikes me as the sort of person who would enjoy playing with his own gender presentation and would be more than open to exploring his gender identity (and probably has!). I think Ayame would lean more toward having an expansive view of masculinity rather than dressing more feminine when he feels more feminine, but I also think he would embrace the different ways people might perceive his gender.

Transgender Woman: Akito Sohma

This I think is quite clear in canon. Akito was assigned male at birth, then transitioned to female.

What makes it hard for some people to see Akito as trans is that the reason she was assigned male at birth was not the typical reason people are assigned male at birth in our world (it was her mother's demand, rather than a guess based on the shape of her genitals), but I don't think that makes her any less trans.

Under the Ace and/or Aro Umbrellas

This umbrella is a little tricky for several of these characters, because they've been forbidden from dating, or had very controlling parents, or thought they'd only hurt anyone they loved, so they haven't necessarily had time to figure out whether they've just repressed that part of themselves or they just don't experience attraction at all/without a strong emotional connection first. (Not everyone needs time to figure that out, though!) But anyway, here's who I think would eventually find themselves under at least one of these umbrellas!

Asexual/Aromantic: Kazuma

I love the tidbit that Kazuma tried dating women, but talked so much about Kyo that he never got a second date. I like the interpretation of him as a gay man, but to me, he reads as asexual/aromantic. Dating just doesn't even seem to be on his radar!

Demisexual/Demiromantic: Kyo, Shigure, Machi

A lot of the fandom sees Kyo as demi, and I'm totally here for that interpretation of him. He generally seems annoyed by or frightened of girls who aren't Tohru (frightened either when there's a risk of transforming, or when Kagura is involved). Also, it's CUTE that Kyo takes after his dad (Kazuma) in this way.

At first blush, it seems very unlikely Shigure is under the ace umbrella, but I couldn't stop thinking about his brief relationship with Mayu. He's the one who suggested they date, yet he seemed completely disinterested in her. He did sleep with Ren, but that was only for revenge and because he imagined Akito would look like her if she'd been allowed to grow up as a woman. I genuinely believe all his "high school girls" ickiness was an act, much like most of his personality.

It doesn't seem like Machi can totally tell if/when she likes something (or someone!). This makes me wonder if she's just never had feelings for anyone before Yuki.

Demiromantic: Rin, Hiro

Rin seems open to sexual relations with people other than Haru, but I genuinely can't see her having romantic feelings for anyone other than him. I see Hiro similarly with respect to Kisa. I think, if they ever split, it would take an extremely long time for him to even be open to falling for someone else.

Under the Bi/Pan+ Umbrella

So, I'm not making a distinction between these two (and other orientations that fall under the same umbrella, like poly- or omnisexual) because that seems like a very personal, internal conversation. I know some people make a distinction between the way bi and pan people experience attraction, but some don't, and that feels too prescriptivist for my purposes here. So, these are characters who I think experience attraction to multiple genders!

Tohru obviously falls for Kyo, but she also thinks Akito is cute, she thinks Rin is "shapely" and "beautiful" (her words!), and she goes along with it when Saki talks about them getting married.

Yuki ends up with Machi (and I love them together!) but I think Kyo was his first crush. His arc is also very relatable for a lot of queer folks (myself included!). And he's a disaster. Long live bisexual disaster Yuki Sohma!

Shigure is tricky, because the flirtation between him and Ayame could just be a joke, but I personally think it's a joke that arose out of some fun nights spent together...

Akito obviously likes men, but she also flirts with Tohru when they first meet.

Saki talks about marrying both Tohru and Kazuma. She's probably joking about Kazuma, but she's generally a very literal person, so I don't think she's joking about Tohru. She also marries a foreigner canonically, and that foreigner is probably a man.

Momiji talks about finding an amazing sweetheart-- not an amazing wife or girlfriend!!-- one day. I think he was being very intentional in not specifying his future partner's gender.

Hatori is the one I feel least sure of, but my headcanon is that he gets so annoyed and embarrassed by Shigure and Ayame because he doesn't want anyone to know he was totally part of at least a few of those trysts...

Mutsuki and Hajime are definitely together, right? And it seems like the fandom mostly sees Mutsuki as bi, which... yeah, that tracks.

Hatsuharu's first love was Yuki, and his last love was Rin.

Kakeru has a girlfriend, but for some reason, I have it in my head that he always refers to Kyo as Yuki's "hot cousin"? Did I just imagine that? Anyway... even if I did make that up, I think his backstory is a great analogy for the experience of coming out. He was trying to fit in a box and decided he was done with it. Pure chaotic bi energy.

For Ayame, see Shigure and Hatori above. (Also, “I am a bottom ALL THE WAY!!!”)

Mine is admittedly here just based on vibes.

Mitsuru likes Ritsu even though she's not entirely sure of Ritsu's gender!

Kimi is also here purely based on vibes.

Gay and Lesbian

Hiroshi has always struck me as gay. I can't really explain it. I usually have absolutely awful gaydar, so it's odd that he gives me such clear gay vibes. I wrote him as gay in my longfic, Bloom Within Us, and I'll probably always write him as gay.

President Takei obviously has a crush on Yuki. We don't really see him show interest in anyone else (partially because he's such a minor character). He also seems to still be a bachelor in Another, which could be because he can't legally marry yet...

My headcanon that Kunimitsu is gay kind of popped up as I was writing Bloom Within Us. There's no particular reason, and he doesn't give me strong gay vibes or anything.

Hajime and Mutsuki are definitely a couple! (Right?!) And it seems like most of the fandom sees Hajime as gay which... yeah, I can get behind that.

Akimoto (Arisa's senpai from her gang) is another character who gives me such strong vibes that I thought it was canon that she was a lesbian. Whoops. Anyway, I headcanon that Akimoto is gay, and referenced that in one of my oneshots.

❤️🧡💛💚💙💜

Controversial omission: Arisa Uotani. She says she likes Kureno because he reminds her of Tohru, but she doesn't like Tohru? Yes, she gives me major queer vibes but this to me points to her being straight. Also, based on the way she reacts to her friends developing crushes or falling in love (and the way they react to her falling in love), I don't think there's anything between her and Saki or her and Tohru (as much as I love fics that pair her with Saki!). I also think not every relationship with lots of physical affection and strong feelings of love has to be romantic.

Anyway, hope you enjoyed reading my queer headcanons! This has been in my drafts for months, so I'm really glad Pride Month gave me a reason to finish this post!

Happy Pride!

[spot-of-tea]

So I've been seeing a lot of pride stuff coming across my dash and thought I'd share my own headcanons for some Fairytail characters.

If someone isn't on this list and you want to know my thoughts on them send me an ask :)

Now with a second part

Natsu

I've always felt that Natsu sits somewhere on the Ace spectrum, he's never shown interest in sex nor does he care for it when anyone mentions it. He is however, panromantic, he cares very little about how a person identifies but if he wants to pursue any sort of relationship then he'll go out of his way to make romantic (at least he thinks it is) gestures towards that special someone. Natsu doesn't actively think about his gender, he genuinely doesn't get the concept, he just dresses and acts how he wants to without putting too much thought into it

Gray

Gray if asked would probably say he's bi, much to Juvia's horror as she now has twice as many love rivals. He'd casually admit to having liked various guys and will weigh in his opinion on checking out the models (male and female) in the latest sorcerer weekly. While Gray would identify as a man he's fairly comfortable in his masculinity and wouldn't mind having his nails painted but would draw the line at wearing women's clothing unless absolutely necessary.

Erza

Demi-ace queen and she knows it. Despite having very little physical interest in people Erza still shows her affection towards her friends by, rather aggressively, showering them with praise and compliments. Erza cares very little about peoples perception of herself and dresses and presents however she pleases. She'll find any reason to dress up.

Cana

Asexual, panromantic. Most people don't realise that Cana doesn't care about sex considering how many dates she goes on and how often she complains about not having a date. In truth as much as Cana can talk dirty and openly flirts with anything that breaths, she really just enjoys someone taking a genuine interest in her and being romantic (not that she'd admit it).

I do have more but this was already getting long, so if there's anyone in particular you want to know my thoughts on send me an ask. I may do a part two at a later date if people want.