#I'm TIRED. and I don't have time to run all my chores

[kifu]

One of my most self-deprecating coworkers has caught on to the fact that I care more about him than he cares for himself. He hasn't connected all the dots yet. I guess I need to be louder about how being nice to yourself improves your life more than you can believe - even though I've been quite clear about that. I shoot down self-depricating comments EVERY time.

[pibsboots]

I've always had chronic fatigue. I remember being twelve, and an adult mentioned how I couldn't possibly know how tired they felt because adulthood brought levels of exhaustion I couldn't imagine. I thought about that for days in fear, because I couldn't remember the last time I didn't feel tired.

Eventually I came to terms with the fact that I was just tired, and I couldn't do as many things as everyone else. People called me lazy, and I knew that wasn't true, but there's only so many times you can say "I'm tired" before people think it's an excuse. I don't blame them. When a teenager does 20 hours of extracurriculars every week and only says "I'm too tired" when you ask them to do the dishes, it's natural to think it's an excuse. At some point, I started to think the same thing.

It didn't matter that I could barely sit up. It was probably all in my head, and if I really wanted to, I could do it.

When I learned the name for it, chronic fatigue, I thought wow, people that have that must be miserable, because I am always tired and I cannot imagine what it would feel like if it were worse.

Spoiler alert, if you've been tired for a decade, it's probably chronic fatigue.

Once I figured that out though, I thought of my energy as the same as everyone else's, just smaller in quantity. And that might be true for some people, but I've figured out recently that it absolutely isn't true for me.

I used to be like wow I have so much energy today I can do this whole list for sure! And then I'd do the dishes and have to lay down for 2 hours. Then I'd think I must gave misjudged that, I didn't have as much energy as I thought.

But the thing is - I did have enough energy for more tasks, I just didn't go about them properly.

With chronic fatigue, your maximum energy is obviously much smaller than the average person's. Doing the dishes for you might use up the same percentage of energy that it takes to do all the daily chores for someone else.

If someone without chronic fatigue was to do all the daily chores, they would take breaks. Because otherwise, they're sprinting a marathon for no reason and it would take way more energy than necessary. We have to do the same.

Put the cups in the dishwasher, take a break. Put the bowls in, take a break. So on and so forth. This may mean taking breaks every 2-5 minutes but afterwards, you get to not feel like you've run a marathon while carrying 4 people on your back.

Today, I had a moderate amount of energy. Under my old system of go till you drop, I probably could have done most of the dishes and wiped off the counter and then been dead to the world for the rest of the day.

Under the new system, I scooped litter boxes, cleaned out the fridge, took the trash out, cleaned the stove, and wiped off the counter and did all the dishes. And after all that, I still had it in me to make a simple dinner, unload the dishwasher, and tidy the kitchen.

It was complete and utter insanity. Just because I sat down whenever I felt myself getting more tired than I already was.

All this to say, take fucking breaks. It's time to unlearn the ceaseless productivity bullshit that capitalism has shoved down our throats. Its actively counterproductive. Just sit down. Drink some water. Rest your body when it needs to rest.

There will still be days where there is nothing to do but rest, and days where half a load of dishes is absolutely the most I can do. But this method has really helped me minimize those, which is so incredibly relieving.

[ros3ybabe]

🎀 Hobbies 🎀

I feel as tho I don't have much time to do things besides school, work, some chores, and survive right now, but I've been thinking about some hobbies I enjoy and would like to incorporate into my life when I decide to make the time without burning out!

Reading - I used to be big on reading just about any books I could get my hands on. Then I was really focused on reading self help, and now that I haven't been reading at all, I've been thinking about getting back into reading. Always looking for book recommendations, and I do have my eye on some books I'd like to purchase.

Gardening - if I had the time and space, I'd love to have a flower garden or a vegetable garden. It always makes me happy when the fruits of my efforts come to life, so tending to plants and gardening sounds super fun and relaxing.

Video Games - I used to play video games on and off, but I wouldn't mind owning a PS4 or a Switch and spending some time playing video games whenever I'd want time to wind down.

Cooking/Baking - I love learning things, and the sense of pride I've gotten in the past when receiving praise for things I've cooked or baked has really driven me to want to increase my skill. I've only baked something from scratch once in my life, but I'd really like to expand my skills in making desserts.

Exercise - I'm talking all forms of it! Dancing, martial arts/kickboxing type activities, yoga, pilates, running, swimming, spin/cycling, weight lifting (again), calisthenics, all of it! I don't currently look like the exercise type but I find various forms of movement to be so fun! If I had more time, I'd be trying new things all the time!

Volunteer work - This is something I used to do all the time, and it's a hobby that I enjoyed that kept me humble. Not only that, but I thoroughly enjoy showing kindness and compassion to others. Making a difference in anuwau brings me so much joy, and I love meeting new people and learning their stories. I also would love to volunteer with animals, because they deserve so much love and affection too!

Drawing/Art - I used to draw for fun but when I started college, I didn't have the time to devote to continuously increasing my art skills. I still own a sketch kit, coloring materials, and several sketchbooks so it really is a matter of having time.

Crochet - The thought of making things that I can gift to others seriously makes me so excited!! Crochet seems like such a fun, crafty, relaxing activity and the added fun of gifting those crafts to others would make it so fun!!

Scrapbooking - I don't know if I'd ever do this one, but I do Ike the idea of keeping my memories in a physical space, and not just in like pictures on my phone.

Learning - if school wasn't crazy busy, I'd spend all my time learning languages (ASL, Japanese, Spanish, Korean, Mandarin, Italian, etc), computer coding skills, how to make and do certain things, just anything I can do to keep my mind enriched.

Upcycling/Altering Clothes - I would love to upcycle or alter articles of clothes into more personalized pieces for myself. The thought of having a personalized, hand made closet full of clothes makes me really want to buy a sewing machine and learn how to use it to my advantage!

That's all I can think of for now that I'd like to someday incorporate into my life. Having hobbies is always so fun, but I've been so busy and tired that I don't mess with any of the hobbies I'd want to do. If anyone has any tips for time management, or resources for beginning new hobbies, please let me know!!

til next time lovelies 🩷

[hellenhighwater]

Mildly weird question for story research purposes: when your cats ride on your shoulder, what does it feel like for you?

Context: My main character has a cat who likes to ride around on her shoulder, and since it's a thing that happens frequently, I'm trying to make sure I write about it well. And, unfortunately, I do not have a cat to even attempt to test it with, so I'm going to the one person I KNOW has experience with this situation.

Specific things that would be helpful to know:

Do you have to be careful not to upset their balance, or can you more or less walk normally once they're up there?

How are they keeping themselves up there? Are there claws involved? Or just good balance?

Where's most of their weight? I looked back at some pictures/vids, and it looks like they typically ride with their front paws on the shoulder and their back paws somewhere a bit below and beside your neck, but I could be wrong.

How long can they stay on your shoulder before one of you has to take a break? Is the weight of the cat tiring, or is it pretty easy to deal with?

Anything else I should be aware of regarding shoulder cats?

Thank you SO MUCH for your help!

Oh, I can definitely answer that! One: It's waaay easier to shoulder a small cat than a big one.

For the most part, they kind of drape themselves over the shoulder; this is specifically what I've trained them to do. Cats will also "shoulder" by draping across both shoulders/back of neck, but this forces your head forward to allow room for them, and it's not comfy. Hence the trained posture. (Malice, in the early days:)

I taught Mal to jump up when I bent forward for her, and circle to face front while I stood up. She can actually do that pretty quickly. Their weight is pretty evenly distributed across the top of the shoulder and down on the pectoral, not really on the back at all. Mal sometimes hooks her back claws into my shirt near the shoulderblade, which is more about balance than weight support. Nim, who was significantly smaller, actually kept her back feet tucked up so that her feet were on the top of my shoulder. This is a significantly more ready posture than Mal's--she would have to readjust for a better foothold to jump down; Nim could leap directly off at a moment's notice. Overall, Nim had far superior shouldering skills to Mal. Malice rides like the meatball she is; I'm hoping she'll learn with age. Here's some pictures of Nim:

To give them a stable position, I do keep my back straight and shoulders back; if I have to pick something up, I will crouch down instead of bending over. If I have to bend forwards, I will put my palm up flat so that they can stand with their front paws on it and keep their body on my shoulder. Generally, I can move, walk, and even work normally. I've cooked, painted, done chores, even run. Both hands are free to use, though generally you can't lift the arm the cat is on above a T position. They don't need to use their claws for balance unless I am doing something really active. I do shoulder almost exclusively on my left shoulder, so that my dominant hand is more free.

The weight is not significant--Nim was only about 8 lbs, Mal is about 11, and because there's no grip to maintain them and they're naturally situated on the shoulder, it's easy to carry them for a long time. I used to walk miles with Nim on my shoulder. It's actually more the heat--cats run hot, and it's a lot of fur on your neck and shoulder if it's warm out. Great in the winter, though!

Notable things you might not realize--their head is in front of yours, so you can still see ear positions, what they're looking at, etc. Nim's night vision/hearing/sense of smell was better than mine, so I could tell if we were sneaking on wildlife based on her reactions and responses to things. You can also feel them tense or adjust posture before they jump or try to get down, and you can feel their tail moving. You can also feel if they're growling or purring, even if you can't hear it. If you're used to paying attention to those cues, you'll notice them while just carrying the cat normally too--Nobody could sneak up behind me if I was carrying Nim facing over my shoulder to the back.

They can jump from shoulder height but it's a hard landing. Usually if I want them down, I just kneel with a knee up, or lift a leg flat while standing so they can jump to the top of my leg and then to the ground.

If I was in a fictional setting and traveling with them long term, I would be investing in a really weird piece of leather armor, that goes to the edge of the neck/crest of shoulder, and down past the bottom of the shoulderblade, with little easy-to-grip leather loops or chainmail on the back of the shoulder.

[neoplatinum]

opposing worlds | kim chaewon

summary: rooming with kim chaewon was a terribly bad (good) decision.

pairing: roommate!chaewon x roommate!reader

themes: enemies (?) to lovers, college au, fluff, very minor angst, chaewon is a micromanager!, implied sexual content, yunjin!

wc: 3.0k

even though its below freezing outside, with a red nose along with frozen ears, you refuse to enter your apartment. fearing the demon that you live with, her legal name being kim chaewon.

a major pain in your ass is how you would describe living with her. you would rather step on legos than to live with her, but with limited on-campus housing you have to deal the cards that you've been dealt.

so you pace outside, on the welcome mat, biting your nails. just getting the courage to walk back into your apartment. one that turns into a war zone whenever chaewon's being a stickler for rules and regulations (ones that she's made for the apartment). you finally stop pacing when you feel the confidence back in your body.

"i'm not letting her dictate what i can and cant do." you say to yourself quietly, this was ridiculous. not being able to enter a space that you pay for just because chaewon was a micromanager pissed you off more than you would like to admit.

as soon as you enter the apartment, you're immediately hit with the silence of the apartment. it's odd, and you can feel a pair of eyes staring at your back. you pay it no mind as you slip off your shoes. you turn to the sight of chaewon with her arms crossed, standing in that familiar stance of authority. letting out a heavy breath, you know, watch her folded arms, tense jaw, and the most telling sign: her foot tapping rhythmically. so you walk towards her, like a child ready for scolding.

"what's it going to be tonight, chaewon? cleanliness, manners, etiquette, or are you going to comment about my clothes?" you explain, frustrated. It seems you can never get things right around miss perfect.

"cleanliness!" she exclaims, pointing at the many dishes piling up in the sink. you grimace at the sight, just remembering it was your turn to do the dishes. "look at our chore list! it's your week!" she continues point at the very detailed chore poster, your name in big bold red letters.

you groan and grab some gloves, preparing for the long lecture about cleanliness and maintaining a proper space. while you are busy washing all the bowls in the sink and placing them on a drying rack, chaewon begins listing off reasons to always maintain a clean apartment—a lecture you have heard far too often.

"enough, chaewon! i am not five, and i don't need to be lectured on why I need to wash the dishes for the 50th time!" you shout at her, cutting her off from her outburst. she stops, and you can see her lips waver, and her hands are balled into fists.

"then stop acting like a five-year-old!" she shouts back at you, stomping to her room and slamming the door. you wince at the sound, feeling a little guilty for yelling at her, she just really set you off tonight.

so you stand in the kitchen all alone with the sound of running water comforting you. feeling the weight of your words, you feel bad that she has to reprimand you for things you should figure out on your own. with a final dish on the rack, you sulk back into your room, thinking of ways to apologize to your roommate.

--

"chaewon?" you wake up early, feeling guilty that you yelled at her. even though you were tired of the lectures, you knew it was wrong to yell at the girl. you tried making a breakfast that she would like. so with a bowl of oatmeal and a cup of her favorite green tea, you carry the tray towards her room and knock on her door.

"what." her voice is flat and monotone. you shrink into yourself before speaking again.

"i made you breakfast...listen i'm sorry about yelling at you. i shouldn't have and i let my emotions get the best of me. could you open the door?" you explain, feeling awful just remembering her face when you yelled at her.

the door opens slowly and behind the door is an upset chaewon with puffy eyes and a bunch of tissues in hand. you slowly walk in and place the tray on her desk. she's busy with her schoolwork it seems, but it also looks like she's been busy crying with the pile of tissues in her waste basket.

it's weird being in her room ever since you found out how high-strung she was. so you have always steered clear of her room, this is the first time you've been inside. noticing how decorated the room is, it's cute, oddly. it's what you expect of chaewon's room, clean and proper. with a splash of green everywhere, that must be her favorite color.

she stares at the bowl of oatmeal you made her, eyeing it wearily. you groan at her.

"i didn't poison it, if that's what you're thinking." you comment quietly. she nods and sits down in her chair to eat it. you wait patiently, not really sure what to do. maybe waiting for feedback at this point. she just nods and you finally feel your shoulders release tension.

"phew." you say out loud.

"thank you for breakfast, i'll stop lecturing you so much." she says quietly. you nod, a little shocked at how dismissive she is. walking out of her room, you still feel a bit awful, maybe you should invite her out somewhere.

before you can begin to ask her, chaewon is already closing her door behind her. you're just grateful she accepted the peace offering.

--

she doesn't comment on your poor behavior in the next couple of weeks, you just feel inclined to do the chores that have been laid out. you don't hear from her for a while, feeling her absence in the apartment.

some days, when you're past boredom, eyes glued to the ceiling, and daydreaming of becoming rich. you think about chaewon and why she's so persistent about cleanliness. you always thought it was a bit extreme, but you never came back to a messy apartment. so you could appreciate that, you just hope she goes back to her own noisy self.

it's become strangely quiet in the apartment without chaewon's constant annoyance towards you. whenever you step outside in the living room in hopes of seeing chaewon, she's never there. your mood is considerably worse without a person to argue with.

you purposely leave out clothes on the floor for her to scold you, but she never comments on it. just stares at it and walks into her room. so with a dejected face, you pick up your own clothes. you hate to admit that you missing your nagging roommate.

--

"is that chaewon?" your friend shouts into your ear. saturday night out, and instead of staying inside with the awkward tension with chaewon, you're out here to party your anxiety away.

the thing that irks you tonight is that this house party is definitely a fire hazard—way exceeding the maximum number of occupants. you remember chaewon telling you to never stay in a place that breaks the maximum occupants.

you turn your head up at the question, looking around and you finally spot your roommate across the room. all you can conclude is chaewon is stupid drunk—dancing like her life depended on it. people all around her are egging her on, and chaewon breaks out the robot, making you laugh.

then some guy starts getting near her to dance with her, you frown at the sight. setting down your cup as you make your way to the other side of the room.

"woah buddy, back up." you put a hand between the dude and chaewon, he flips you off before walking away. you are about to chase after him to give him a piece of your mind, but then you remember chaewon in front of you. blearly eyes chaewon, with her stumbling and drunk laughter filling your senses. she refocuses her eyes, and they land on you, eyeing your outfit.

"what are you doing here?" she asks in a slurred tone, her finger wagging in your face.

"i could ask you the same thing." you raise your eyebrows, confused by the sight of miss perfect student chaewon partying on a sunday night. she scoffs at you.

"don't tell me what to do." she crosses her arms as best as she can, definitely feeling the drunkness.

"don't tell me what to do." you mock her tone, laughing at her when she gets mad at you. she starts to walk away, but you grab her arm. "hey, let's go home. it's late."

"no! let me go." she stomps her foot like a child.

"alright, let's do this the hard way." you say and and hoist her up, carrying her out the stuffed house.

"let me down! i'm not done partying." she shouts. you pay her no mind as she tries pushing you away. you laugh because she really isn't trying that hard.

so you take her back home, walking down frat row until you reach your apartments. by then she's fallen asleep, arms wrapped around your neck and snoring lightly. it's cute seeing chaewon so relaxed, you're glad you found her, it's been weird being at home without her. you hope whatever is happening between you two just returns back to normal.

you fumble around with the key to your apartment, and with a final push you walk into her room. unwrapping her arms from your neck, as you set her down in her bed. you admire the way chaewon looks in makeup, gorgeous and very serene.

but you also know that chaewon hates going to sleep with her makeup on, so you rummage through her makeup drawer, finding makeup wipes for her. you take the time to gently wipe all the makeup off, finding it peaceful and fulfilling to do so.

she fusses a bit when you wipe too hard. you pull back and let her calm down, before wiping the rest of it off. throwing the used wipes in her waste basket. when you turn around, you see her knocked out cold, laying like a starfish on her green comforter.

you smile at the sight and then roll her under her comforter, tucking her in. with light footsteps, you close her door, and return back to your own room. the smile never leaves your face.

--

it's been about a week since the party, chaewon was embarrassed that you had brought her home. so she bought you coffee and a muffin nearly every morning.

she lets you explain that night from your point of view, her face goes red at the embarrassing parts. you purposely leave out the part where that guy was trying to dance with her. for some reason, you feel upset when you talk about it, maybe he just looked too creepy.

she dissapears into her room soon after, something along the lines of, "i need to process all this."

later that night, you're writing on your laptop when you hear chaewon's door open. the sight of her in a nice form fitting dress and her hair done up, your jaw drops and you jump to your feet.

"where are you going?" you ask. she's checking her purse for something. she looks up at you confused.

"a party?" she states like it's so obvious. your body is jittery at the idea. you think quickly, she's not going out by herself. what if she gets kidnapped?

"wait, let me go with you." you say as you rush into your room to get ready, no way you're letting her go to that party alone. you need to fend off the creepy men for her.

"why are you going?" she asks from outside the doorway. a little confused at the sight of you throwing clothes everywhere. she even steps inside to pick up the clothes now littered all over the floor.

"just cause." you say and grab your outfit. rushing into your bathroom to change. within a few minutes you walk out ready to accompany chaewon.

she's on her phone waiting for you, and you examine her outfit. you rummage through the closet, looking for a nice warm jacket. slipping it over her shoulders as you both set out for the night. you miss how chaewon's cheeks warm at the gesture.

--

it has started becoming a regular habit: if you can't attend the party with chaewon, no matter how late or wasted she is, you always pick her up from the party. if she was too tired or drunk, you would help tuck her into bed.

oftentimes, you even had to help her puke her guts out from drinking too much. but that was never a pretty sight, so you try and get her to puke her guts out before she enters the apartment.

one night, she ends up just crawling into your bed. when you fall asleep, you feel her body warmth against your body. she makes herself comfortable under the blanket. wrapping her arms around your torso as she lays against your pillow.

you move yourself further off the edge of the bed as she scoots closer. she mumbles something about how warm her bed is, and honestly, even with her taking up your personal space, you don't mind.

it has somehow blended into a habit to sleep together every night when she came in the next night, and without a word, slipped under the comforter again. you let her, too scared of saying anything in case it scared her away. it's become a nightly thing to just sleep in the same bed together...even when she's not drunk.

--

"you two do what?" yunjin is staring at you with her food half chewed.

"dont talk with food in your mouth, you're going to catch flies." you comment.

"oh great, now you sound like chaewon too." yunjin bites her food. you decided to contact yunjin in hopes of figuring out what to do with this new "development" with chaewon. the habit of her sleeping in your bed with you. sometimes you wake up and catch chaewon staring at you.

"so you two sleep together in the same bed, brush your teeth together, go about your morning and nightly routine together, and even cuddle...platonically." yunjin questions you, but the sarcasm is dripping as she says it.

"yes." you answer.

yunjin takes a deep breath before starting up again, she didn't think you were so dense. "dude, chaewon is into you."

"no she's not, just two months ago we were at each other throats. don't you remember?" you ask.

"of course i remember, oh my GOD, is this my real life enemies to lovers slow burn 10k words fic in real life?" yunjin says to herself towards the end.

"you seriously have got to get off the internet." you cross your arms staring at the girl. "you aren't helping, by the way."

"help with what?" she asks, a little confused.

"what do i do?" you ask her. ever since the new habit of chaewon and yours, you've been going through your days all confused, always thinking about chaewon.

"you either grow a pair and confess you want to be more than 'sleep buddies' or you wuss out and just let her continue doing this." she says plainly.

you disregard her comment, "forget what i said." you say. yunjin just shrugs and continues eating her meal, letting you sit with your own thoughts.

--

so you do wuss out like an absolute coward. just letting the unspoken words take over you and chaewon's sleeping arrangements. you let her continue to invade your space, moving her stuff into your room. her decorations, her clothes in your drawers, and just recently she moved her desk into your room, placing it just next to your desk.

you were shocked at the arrangement but couldn't find the confidence to comment on it. it's weird; now you two practically exist in each other's space all the time; just two months ago, you were cursing the world for giving you chaewon as a roommate. now you can't imagine going to sleep without seeing her and her hair roller every night.

sleeping together turns into unspoken dates: going to the movies together, going bowling, getting groceries together, and even going to high-end restaurants together.

it's like you're dating unofficially. those were the exact words your friend told you when he came over to visit. when you let him into your room to show off your movie posters, he immediately thought you had a girlfriend, you had to explain to him how it was just chaewon.

he looked at you like you grew a third eye, confused at how chaewon went from most annoying person in the world, to someone who sleeps in your bed every night. you try not to let those words mean so much, but secretly you're hoping you can officially date her.

--

one night, you go out clubbing with chaewon; she looks gorgeous in her tight dress and her hair laid out, showing off her dancing to you. you recently found out thar chaewon was part of the dance team, often visiting her showcases. now you enjoy just watching her let loose, like a free soul, not bounded by her own rules. its beautiful to see.

by the third song of you two circling each other on the dance floor, you kiss her. pulling her into your embrace, hands reaching her back and pushing her closer to you. she welcomes the kiss and lets you pull her closer. hands running up your hair, tugging lightly.

you make out with her against the club wall, and drag each other home with urgency. laughing loudly in the streets like teenagers in love.

"be mine." she breathes into your ears that night.

"only if you're mine too." you kiss her shoulder, and she nods.

--

yunjin visits you two the next day, screaming at the sight of you two in your bed and covering her eyes immediately. you wake up horrified with chaewon clinging onto you as yunjin screams for the whole apartment complex to hear. she slams the door closed and runs out of the apartment. you and chaewon both look at each other before laughing loudly.

even though yunjin avoids both you and chaewon for the next two weeks, you don't feel an ounce of regret. you can honestly say that rooming with chaewon was the best decision of your life.

--

a/n: i feel like chaewon fits enemies to lovers really well but maybe that's just me. didn't really proofread this one but anyways. posting this piece first because it was decided by the people! i hope it was worth the wait! stay safe and stay healthy everyone!

[kentopedia]

contents. nanami takes care of you after a long day, fluff, very soft, 600ish words

notes. trying to clean out my drafts tbh

the first thing you did when you got home was collapse onto kento's lap.

he'd hardly had time to greet you before you were dropping your bag, crawling over the other cushion to rest your head on his thigh. wordlessly, you curled into a ball, melting into his skin, the dark shadows under your eyes evident.

you'd gotten home later than usual, your projects, work, and errands keeping you busy over the past couple of days. though he saw you every morning, every evening, your time together had been limited recently.

balance had always been difficult for the two of you. kento knew how much you hated overworking yourself, though a part of you couldn't stop it, couldn't dispel the feeling that you were doing something wrong if you stole too many moments for yourself.

the two of you were similar to him in that manner. you did it because you felt like you were supposed to, not because you truly wanted to.

exhaling gently, he placed a warm hand on your head, gently rubbing your temple with his thumb. "everything okay, sweetheart?" he asked quietly, massaging out the tension in your neck, the tightness that you always clasped so tightly in your jaw.

you didn't open your eyes, but you hummed, relaxing into him. "'m fine, kento," you said, your voice so soft in this stillness of the evening. "just tired."

the sky was a deep black outside, the takeout he'd grabbed after work already packed up nicely in the fridge. it was far too late for anyone to be out in the world, and yet, your makeup still smeared on your cheeks, pants wrinkled around your calves.

kento hated seeing you so beaten down, worn out from your long days. a heavy sigh left his lips. "headache?"

"mmhm,” you hummed, tapping a finger against his knee. “how do you always know?”

kento would’ve laughed, had he not felt so concerned for your well being, missing the livelier version of yourself that he cared for so dearly. if anyone knew how you felt, it was him. "you've been working too hard this week."

you smiled, blinking your eyes up at him wearily. his lips were curled down farther than usual, the frown permeating his serious expression. "i'll be okay." you said squeezing his hand. "let me lay down for a few minutes, and then i'll be fine."

kento sighed, placing his warm hand on your forehead as you glanced up at him, hardly able to keep your eyes open. "honey," he said quietly, running his fingers through your hair in a soothing manner. "just go to sleep."

"mm," you hummed, a yawn leaving you a moment later. there was still a long list of things for you to do, and though it was late, you didn't want to leave them for tomorrow. "i've got to do my laundry. and then i have to—"

kento cut you off, letting a heavy hand rest on your head. "it's okay. i'll take care of it."

you blinked up at him tiredly, starting to sit up. "no, no, it's okay, ken. i'm' fine. you're tired too."

"sweetheart," kento kissed you when you were fully seated, not quite on his lap, but leaning over him slightly. "you can barely keep you eyes open." he smiled once more, pushing your back down onto his lap. "i'll take care of it."

though you wanted to protest, you didn't think that you could get your body to move, to even cooperate with you to do the rest of your chores. your exhaustion had seeped into fatigue, and you fell back onto his thighs, slumping over him.

“sorry, kento.” you frowned, a wave of emotion and disappointment in yourself washing over you. but as he threaded his fingers through your hair, you could already feel yourself falling asleep, your eyelids heavy.

he shook his head, a small, breathy laugh leaving him. "don't be sorry. that's what i'm here for. you don't have to take care of it all on your own."

[angelltheninth]

Poly Relationship with Thoma and Ayato

Pairing: Thoma x Fem!Reader x Ayato

Tags: nsfw, smut, poly relationship, sneaking around, marking, praise, spit-roasting, double pentation, lots of cum

A/N: One more thing written for the lovely @tinyyellowtoad.

THOMA

With Thoma you can expect a lot of sneaking around the mansion in order to stay hidden from prying eyes. He's not too keen on being seen balls deep in your pussy, you hopping and bouncing up and down on his cock and his pants fully down his legs. That'd be a very compromising position indeed. So he tries to find empty rooms, storage rooms, or even behind a big tree if he's really horny.

Shrugs his jacket and pulls his shirt up so you can see his pecks. There are many reasons Thoma works out, one is of course to make his chores easier, but the other is so he can hold you up by your thighs and mouth at your boobs or your neck while you ride him like you haven't had his cock in months.

"Hurry, hurry up. Mn... fuck! You're gonna get us caught if you're so loud. You know how Ayato can get. My fault? How so, love? You like my cock so much, you're willing to be caught on it. Keep talking like that and you're gonna have to stay here while I go get you a fresh pair of underwear. Wait, even better, you can just walk around without them, you know I always do a good job cleaning you up after. Not so shy with my cock up your pussy but this gets you all flustered? You're so damn precious."

AYATO

When you're with Ayato you feel like you don't have to worry or think much. He's got you folded over his table, fucking you from behind in his study, his heavy balls slapping against your outer folds while he gently presses you down and runs his hand to the back of your neck to give it a little squeeze. Not so hard that he chokes you but enough to leave his fingerprints on your neck, if only a little. Don't try to keep quiet, he'll just pull your hand back so he can slam you, pull you back onto his hard cock.

He rarely comes inside you whiteout Thoma around, he prefers to share that experience. Besides you look really good wearing white in his opinion. One day he'd love to see you in a white dress. Until then his cum will do nicely as a replacement.

"Already so sensitive, my darling. Seems like Thoma has already gotten to you today hasn't he? And you're still wanting more, spreading for me, looking so beautiful with all that cum over your back. You don't need to deny it, I'm not angry. I love you, and I know you can keep taking my cock. We can keep doing this all night if you're up to it, I can get you looking so pretty and fucked out by morning."

THOMA + AYATO

Usually they love to tag team you, one cock in your pussy, the other in your mouth. Flat on your back, and ready for them, whimpering and moaning while they fill you with their cum on both ends. Your mouth gets tired pretty easily, sucking on Ayato's cock and then having Thoma push you on your back and thrusts into your mouth every time Ayato pulls out of your pussy, always keeping your holes occupied.

When you can't suck anymore Thoma will pull you on top of him, wrap his arms around you and push his cock into you while you angle your hips up, enticing Ayato to join him. You're used to having them both by now as its the only way Ayato likes to finish inside you. You're absolutely cockbroken by the time their cocks soften inside of you that you keep rolling you hips against them.

"Ready for darling? We're gonna give you a lot. Can you still take it? Thoma filled you up so well before. Yes? Good girl. You look very pretty with two cocks inside you, doesn't she Thoma?"

"So good. I can't stop fucking her. Your hole feels so good around me love. It's must hurt when we're both inside you for so long. It's okay, after we're done both Ayato and I will kiss it better. Promise."

[matchadobo]

KIDD; fvck me like you love me

wc: 1933 summary: name finally gets vocal about her relationship with kidd, wanting more than just s3x warning/s: nsfw🔞, fem reader, smut-fluff-smut, very cute and sensual

"you catching feelings, captain?" you gazed at the shirtless redhead beside you, he's got his eyes closed and his human arm behind his head, his biceps and torso too fucking toned it drives you beyond insanity.

he opened his eyes, sitting and gazing down at you. "that so? you sure you're not breakin' first?" he got off the bed, waltzed to the bathroom without caring that he's fucking naked, and peed while looking at you in the mirror. after washing his hands, he made his way back.

"love, aye? you think you've got what it takes to love me?" he crawled back in the bed, reaching over to give you a wet kiss.

"mm-mm, it's too late, eustass. we've got to resupply and leave early tomorrow." you pulled away, but he instead planted kisses on your neck, gripping your waist closer.

"why'd i have to listen to you? i'm the captain of your ship, sugar." he murmured by your shoulders.

"come on, like i don't shut you up during sex." you got on top of him.

"you do most of the shutting up, don't you? got you all dumb over my cock." he had a firm grip on your hips, up to your waist, before he settled them on your tits. "what do you want? wanna go for round 2?"

"wanna know what i really want?" you leaned down, nose to nose and forehead to forehead with him. "i want you to fuck me like you love me."

he looked at you with stunned eyes, blinking as if it'd give him the clarity from what he just heard. "you've already dropped the hint so many times, right? why don't you come prove it, big guy?"

progress was there, but it ain't hefty. baby steps, you know eustass wasn't big on emotions. you'd notice he'd be on your side more, if not behind, or maybe act more protective by standing before you. he doesn't want to undermine how strong you are, he just wants to show you that this meathead will protect you.

he'd start holding you tighter during idle times in parties, his arms and touch would never leave you nor would his lips, you'd always find a place for yourself between his thighs.

when you're doing chores like laundry and dishes, he helps you and once you tease him about it, he'll brush off an excuse like he's bored and tells you to shut up about it. he'll even use his powers to give an extra hand. he'll even go an extra mile to help you carry stuff, brushing it off that your ass might get tired and he doesn't want to deal with it kinda shit.

and that one time, on your birthday, he even baked you a cake! with killer's help of course, but he didn't tell you that 🤫. he even got some frosting and powder on his body and shirt while handing it to you. he was the cutest thing.

instead of inviting you for booze, he'd have an intricately designed metal bouquet and will shyly hand it to you while asking you to have dinner with him at some lowkey diner on town. when you two would finish, he'd take you to the dock near your ship and dip your toes on the sea while watching the stars, moon, and entertaining yourselves with more shit you to never run out to talk about.

once it becomes too late and you two are in the mood, he'd give you a long kiss before spinning you around like the one they do in romantic movies. once you face him again, he'd wrap you in his embrace and place a kiss on your forehead. "you ready? i'll show you how the next pirate king fucks you like he loves you."

you found your saliva pooling in your mouth, hence choking, while alternating your gaze at his lustful, amber eyes. "i'm...scared?"

"that's what you also told me when we first met. seems you attract what you fear, lovely." he chuckled, letting you go before intertwining your fingers together as you two walked hand in hand on your shared quarters.

he'd start by taking your coat off, placing a kiss on your cold, bare shoulders on the way. you shivered and leaned at his touch. he then zipped down your dress, hooking the arm loops by your arms to let it slide down the floor before grasping your mounds firmly. his cold hands left you breathless as you shut your eyes.

"turn around for me, angel." he mumbled softly and you complied. he raised your chin with his index and planted a kiss on your lips, something was different about how he kisses lately. he takes his time taking your breath away with how long he wants to stay connected. he got more handsy, more on your neck, jaws, and cheeks.

your hands made its way to his clothes, slipping off his tank top and unbuttoning his jeans. he'd guide you to his raven, velvety bed while staying connected to you, swallowing your moans. once you made it to the bed, he'd let you lay down as he gets on top of you.

"ehh? doing the giving? that's a surprise, kidd." you propped yourself up by your elbows, watching him plant wet kisses on your bare body.

"mmm, wanna give my woman what she deserves." he peppered your skin with haphazard kisses and licks, making sure to stipple the surface of your torso with the prints from his lips.

"you're getting more slick with words, captain." you smiled, observing how he proceeds.

"aye. you've taught me beautiful things, sweet stuff." he met your twinkling eyes, his lips had a sheen of saliva as the tint on his lips get more smudged with each kiss on your body. "let's get this thing off, hm?" he lowly growled, biting the string of your panties and sliding it off your hips. "'s on the way."

"what a naughty captain you are." you got comofrtable, combing your fingers through his rich, ruby locks.

"you see," he pried your thighs open, nibbling at the skin just before your cunt. "i haven't gone to realize how much 'giving' is so much better than 'receiving' until i've seen you look at me with that dirty glint on your eyes, expecting to be praised and made love to." he reached over to brush his thumb under your eye. "how it begs for more and how you repeat 'please' like a dirty, little prayer when i dote on your pretty, throbbing cunt." he then placed his thumb to rub on your clit while keeping his eyes on you, he smirked seeing your face contort to a lewd pout. "and don't even get me started when you scream my name, sweetness. you sound so, so fuckin' precious."

"i'm at my fuckin' knees, my queen."

you stifled your moans with his pillows, pushing his head further in your cunt. he reached over to hold your hand, letting you bury his head on your sopping crevice.

once you were a panting, crazed, whore, he'd finally wipe off his mouth like he just had the meal of his life. he'd kiss you with the same lips that drowned in your juices, it was so dirty yet you love it so much.

he positioned himself. he rarely does missionary, he loves your ass so much he'd always be headstrung on giving you backshots. but now, he'd want to never take his eyes off you, the same with you to him. so he pressed his forehead to yours, intertwining your fingers with his, and exchanged breaths once he was fully in. you two fucked so many times but this one feels different, he feels different. he's warmer, he's more gentle. he looked into your eyes way more, he kissed you way more, and he held your hands on the way, squeezing each time you felt like you were leaving earth with his unholy manner of fucking.

"don't lose yourself too much, bunny. we're doing this all night." he planted a kiss on your cheek then on your hand after before grasping your hips and drilled into you. "you look so beautiful like this, name." he panted, throwing his head back and seeing as his styled hair get more and more disheveled. a hotter version of your lover. his eyeliner and lipstick was already smudged with all the unholy acts you two have been doing. his hair has been pulled so many times and your lipstick marks have decorated his face and body.

"y-you're too-aah- fucking good- fuck-" you slurred with each thrust, scratching on his arms as your eyes rolled at the back of your head. he's filling you up so good, so full, and he even held you tight. you were in heaven.

he leaned down, bodies close together as he slowed down his pace. connecting his forehead with yours once again, intertwined hands settled at the side of your head, his eyes looking deeply into yours. his hips rocking you back and forth, prying your legs open.

"i love you." he broke out, kissing the corner of your lips. "you're the best fucking thing that ever happened to me, you know that?"

you broke into giggles at this once emotionally constipated man that used to scowl and bark violently at you who was now inside you, at your cheeks as you felt the heat in his face get deeper, proclaiming his love for you. you pulled him in for a hug, placing a kiss on his cheek.

there was something different about his eyes. his eyes mirrors how he desires you, not sexually, but physically. he yearns to have you inside of him. too desperate to have you in his arms. too hungry to hear how you say it back to him. too hopeful to make you feel good. too lost in the pleasure of your cunt and the melody of your moans.

and he was slow and gentle. delicately fucking you yet he was so deep and so good. his breath was hot against your cheek as he panted for more. his grip was firm yet protective. his thrusts were sharp but he always studied your gaze, seeing any shift in your expression. it was a silent exchange of words with parted lips and smiling eyes. you stayed like that for a while, earnestly memorizing how each other looked under immense hypnosis of the addicting back and forth feeling. a warm, budding sensation that left knots on your stomachs.

kidd is the most, if not the only one, vocal partner you have ever slept with. he wouldn't have any shame in being so loud and letting your crew members hear how good he's feeling. but tonight, he was all about hums and low growls. he wanted to hear you more. he wanted to hear how much you wanted him. he wanted to hear how good he's making you feel. he wanted to chorus with your moans and let yours echo in his ears.

so once he was close, he placed his lips by your cheek after kissing your forehead. "do i come inside? can i come inside?" he begged, tucking hairs behind your ear. his hot breaths and guttural moans driving you stupid.

"hmm, i wouldn't mind having cute, little brats with you." you smiled ear to ear, placing a kiss on his forehead. you saw the gradual, sheepish smile that spread across his lips. "i'll be glad they'll take after their father."

this was kind of all over the place? buuut can't get started on the requests yet 🥹 shit at school are piling up again

[softshuji]

You're washing up when Hanma comes home.

There's a subdued and tired 'where's my princess?' echoing in the hallway as he slips off his shoes, tossing them haphazardly onto the rack to trip over in the morning, by which he'll curse out loud as he slips over them, his lanky body leaning against the wall.

You don't answer, and it strikes him as odd that you're not there to run and jump into his arms the second he walks in like he's used to, all eagerness and love that has you pressed to the wall in a heated kiss on instinct.

'Princess?' he says, and his head comes around the door to the kitchen where you stand with your back to him, the clean dishes neatly piled as you scrub with a determination that has your hands sore.

He knows.

'You good?' and his arms come around you, his mouth finding your neck, your jaw, your cheek, cold and tense and he stiffens in unison with you.

'yeah.' clipped, and he frowns, the crease of his perfect brows tickling your collarbone. His hands slip further down to your tummy, where the cold water drenching your skin has him shivering.

'Pretty girl? Your shirts wet.' matter of factly, and he's reaching over to switch off the taps and turn you around to face him.

You still, a minor resistance and you're pulling back to keep at your chore. 'It always gets wet when I'm washing up.'

He searches your eyes, finds the answer there in the unwavering gaze still locked onto the soapy water in the sink, your hands roughened by the water.

'I'll go get you some fresh clothes.'

'You don't need to.'

'I'm not asking you permission sweetheart,' he says, firmness and love that has him understanding you wordlessly. 'How long have you been standing here?'

'I'm not sure. A few hours maybe.'

'I see.'

A wordless hum, and he strokes your cheek, bloodied knuckles that have your eyes welling despite your inner protestations.

You're not sure how it happens. He dries your hands, holding them firmly as he leads you to the bedroom where you stand, a little adrift, a little confused as you always are when this happens, and reaches into the wardrobe to fish out a fresh shirt of his and shorts of yours. You watch him, still in his suit, his gun flashing every so often as he bends to pull your shorts down. Socks too, your favourite ones, that he slips onto your feet, a kiss to each ankle that has your eyes pricking with tears.

He's more serious than usual at times like this. He asks if you're sick and you reply in the negative. He feels your forehead and pulls your shorts on, his hands gentle, skimming along your sides, a firm and reassuring touch along your back, his fingertips tracing your spine.

'arms up sweetheart.'

You lift them and pulls your wet shirt off, replaces it with one of his own, fresh and clean. The relief is palpable and you nearly sag against him when he pulls you, just like that, to his body. As if you could melt, as if you could fall right through him.

'Something happen while I was gone?' he says and strokes your hair, one big hand that's warm on your cold skin, the other resting on the nape of your neck.

'no, no it didn't.'

'And you're not sick?' he says, his lips to your forehead, your arms rising to rest on his back, so big and beautiful.

'I'm not sick.'

'Hm. Just one of those days?'

'Maybe.'

'I see.' And he reaches behind you for hand cream, squeezes it out before massaging it onto your skin.

You cry. And he never mentions it, never says anything as your tears slip down the grazes on his skin, bruised knuckles now hot, the red of previous grazes stinging slightly from your tears. He hums, massages your hands, kisses the back of each one before holding the bed covers open, inviting, wordless.

You slide in, still crying and he strips before he slips in behind you, warm covers tucked up to your chin. He always waits and you love that about him, love that he's patient enough to hold out till it makes more sense, that he takes direction, initiative that comes from love without you asking.

You fall asleep soon after, your tired sniffles giving way to soft sighs, and he slips out of the bed again, for the kitchen, where he rearranges the cutlery and cleans, discarding your wet shirt And dirty laundry, ready for you when you wake again.

Reblogs appreciated!

[sirfrogsworth]

Froggie's (Almost) Very Productive Day

I try to fit as many out-and-about chores as possible into a single day so I only have one set of post-exertional malaise consequences instead of consequences after each day of doing a thing. So any time I decide to drive, I try to find several tasks to accomplish all at once.

My first stop was the Family Services Division in the hopes of getting some help with grocery bills. I am making ends meet, but it seems to be getting harder each month. And maybe I could have skipped my trip to Florida and saved that money, but if I don't do something drastic for my mental health, I fear this first holiday season without a parent could send me into the darkness.

I needed to do an interview to finish applying for SNAP. I wanted to do a phone interview, but the next appointment was in January. So I went to social services where they allow walk-in appointments. I waited in a tiny plastic chair for several hours until they called my name. She yelled out "Benjamin" because when most people see "Grelle" they aren't really sure how to say it. (Rhymes with belly.)

She started my interview and it was going swimmingly at first. But then she started asking questions about the house and my inheritance and my trust. I had no idea what to tell her. It feels like a mistake now, but I have had pretty much no involvement in that process. I have no idea how it works. And I started to panic because she was acting like I was committing fraud or something by not mentioning the trust. But the entire point of the trust was to protect my benefits. Nothing is mine. I own nothing. I have no access. But I had no idea how to explain that.

Maybe my lawyer can help me apply, but I did not want them investigating everything and screwing things up before we even have the estate through probate. We specifically hired a lawyer and went through this convoluted process to make sure everything was on the up and up. But she really made me feel like I was doing something wrong. And that made me panic, which probably made me look even more guilty of something. So I just canceled everything and left.

After a few hours in a crowded government office, I decided to head to a different crowded government office.

I know I didn't need it until 2025, but I decided to go ahead and get my Real ID thingie before my first flight. I was kind of hoping they'd retake my picture because my current driver's license is... well...

And I'm so glad they took my big terrible picture and made it into a smaller, more terrible picture.

People complain about the DMV, but the one near me runs like a machine. It was filled with people and I still only had a 10 minute wait time.

I'm starting to wonder if all of those 80s comedians who were all, "What's the deal with the DMV?" were exaggerating.

Good stuff, Jerry.

I head up to the counter and ask for a Real ID. She asks for two pieces of mail and my birth certificate.

And this disappointed me a little bit.

I did my research. I went to the Real ID website and used their interactive guide to figure out exactly which documents I would need. They gave me this entire checklist and I printed it out and went through all my records and mail trying to find everything.

I had to wait a week for my internet bill to come because it's the only thing I forgot to change to paperless. This took a lot of effort and I was ready to be validated for being so prepared.

And she asks for two pieces of mail.

Any mail.

So I was off to get new tires.

Driving around on 8 year old bald tires was giving me anxiety. I didn't have the money for new tires, but I remember the guy saying they had financing. Recently several of my past debts went past the statute of limitations, and so my credit score lifted itself out of the pits of "poor" and into the realm of "fair." So I decided to take a chance and apply for a Discount Tire credit card. It's a 6 month payment plan with no interest, so that didn't feel as predatory as all the credit card offers I get in the mail with 8000% interest.

We started going through the approval process and I was answering all of the questions and then I saw the name of the bank offering the credit. It was the same bank that tried to sue me and also the bank that can longer collect due to the statute. I was worried they put me on some sort of list and would deny me. But, to my surprise, they approved me instantly. And wouldn't you know it, they gave me almost exactly the amount needed for a new set of tires.

I'm hoping we'll be doing another auction of the house stuff soon, so I plan to pay off the card and then cancel it, but this was the only solution I could come up with to drive safely until then.

I was having a weird day where photos of crusty rich wide dudes followed me everywhere I went. Here is my good ol' boy governor at the entrance to social services.

And at the tire place, I noticed this fella...

Why does every rich CEO think they are a font of wisdom capable of creating compelling quotes?

Does he think no one has ever said "work hard" and "have fun"? And after he said this was he like...

"That's gold, put that in *every* store."

"Oh, and use that picture of me where it looks like a handsome gal just grabbed my undercarriage."

He probably thinks, "Well, no one has put these specific generic platitudes together into a single mega-platitude. I am a genius."

"Be honest, work hard, have fun, be grateful, pay it forward" sounds like he had a bunch of motivational posters on his wall and started reading them all at once.

Like, every line could have a picture of an eagle above it.

In any case, the guy at the tire store, Dakota, was really nice. He made the experience very low anxiety. And he really liked my Thor's Hammer keychain with built in fidget spinner.

He went around showing it to all his coworkers. "Look, it even spins!" And they were like, "Dude, where did you get that??" And I was like, "Amazon." Now I'm just imagining 10 dudes at a tire store all fidgeting their hammers.

As nice as he was, Dakota was still a salesman and had a job to do. He gave me two tire options and tried to upsell me. The cheapest tires had a "1" rating for winter. He said they get "super hard" in the cold... I tried not to giggle. But I explained I drive about twice a month and mostly to the grocery store. If it is a bad winter day, I'll just wait or get delivery. He understood and set me up with the cheaper tires.

He then checked out my car and noticed my tire pressure sensors were dying. I keep getting a warning light on my dash. Apparently they all have tiny batteries in them that die after 7 years. And you can't just replace the batteries so you have to install brand new sensors.

And this is where my social anxiety got me into trouble.

I don't actually need these sensors. They are usually inaccurate. I prefer to test my tires with an actual gauge. But I got so caught up in his sales pitch that I agreed to replace them... at $60 each. For that I could have gotten the fancier tires. I really don't care if an orange light shows up on my dash. And I looked up the price online and a pack of 4 is $30. Though that is without installation.

But still... I wasn't thinking and he was so nice that I was just like, "I want to please Dakota. Saying no might make Dakota sad." Dakota's job is selling me but that doesn't mean I have to buy anything. He would live if I had said "no thanks."

To make my blunder more blunderous, when they finished the tires he asked for my key fob. And it decided that was the time for the battery to die. And in order to reset the system for the new tire pressure sensors, you have to press two buttons on the fob for 7 seconds. Thankfully I had a spare fob at home, but if I want my fancy new $240 sensors to work, I have to return to Dakota and have him initialize them.

I really hope these are the Cadillac of sensors.

Or, like, the ones they use on Cadillacs?

They better be accurate, is what I'm saying.

I do feel safer with new tires. So I am glad I did that. And I gave them a good obligatory kick and felt the tread. They seem nice enough even if they get boners in the winter. It's crazy how bald my other tires were in comparison. Like, I can fit half my finger down into the tread on the new ones—which did not get them super hard.

The way I drive, I probably won't wear them down. They'll probably start to rot before I do.

Before I do, meaning before I wear them down.

Not before I rot.

I am not in a rotting competition with my tires.

I was then off to Sam's. I decided all of my hard work accomplishing 2 out of 3 goals deserved some sushi. So I grabbed some California Rolls and headed home. On my way out, a Hummer and a Porsche nearly collided in the parking lot. And they sort of got stuck facing each other. One of them needed to back up and they both signaled at each other like "You back up, I'm not backing up." And it was just this weird standoff between the two douchiest looking cars you could imagine.

I mean, you have to be a douche to drive a Hummer.

I still remember the mystery Hummer dialysis patient from when my dad was going 3 time per week. We could never figure out who owned the Hummer, but we knew it was not the underpaid nurses and techs. So it had to be one of the patients. And none of them seemed the type. We never solved that mystery.

That hummer started off a delightful safety yellow. (Elon would cry.)

They decided this wasn't extra enough... so they did this...

Katrina and I could never decide... are these cow spots or the world's least effective camoflauge?

There was another patient who drove this old beater...

And I loved seeing this car because we had the same one when I was a little kid. I'm afraid the aesthetics of the 1980s Caprice Classic did not stand the test of time, but it had great sentimental appeal for me.

But this maroon beast that squeaked and sputtered its way from here to there belonged to a very sweet older gentleman. Sometimes he and my dad would be dialysis buddies—sitting next to each other in the recliners. And the worst thing about dialysis was the boredom. All you have to do is watch broadcast TV with 4 channels.

All of the TVs require headphones. They give you your own set of super cheap headphones in the dialysis welcome bag. They were very uncomfortable so I ordered my dad better ones with cushioned ear cups.

His dialysis buddy noticed them and thought they looked nice. And then he revealed that his free headphones broke and he didn't know how to get new ones. He had been watching TV with no sound for weeks. So, I bought another pair with the soft ear cups and my dad gave them to his friend. And it just made me happy imagining the two of them watching The Price is Right in matching headphones.

I do have to make fun of this sweet old man a little bit. When I walked passed his car I noticed he implemented the world's most effective anti-theft device ever created.

That's right... The Club™.

If someone decides they have to have a 40 year old car with an engine that sounds like a dying hyena and a hubcap missing... they are out of luck.

But hey, you gotta protect what is important to you. And if I needed a getaway car and my choices were between his beater and the Cow Hummer, I'd take his ride for sure.

Well, I'd try... and then get arrested because The Club™ is undefeatable.

Do NOT look that up on YouTube. It's 100% true. (And the Lock Picking Lawyer doesn't count due to him being able to break into Fort Knox with a paperclip and then doing it again to make sure it isn't a fluke.)

The dialysis center is in the same complex as my local Tolerable Schnucks and I still see that maroon boat of a car every once in a while. I always smile whenever it is there because it lets me know he is hanging in there and hopefully still has sound for his TV.

Wow, I went off on a mega-tangent.

I didn't even finish talking about my day. Where was I? Oh, the douche standoff finally ended. The Porsche Douche capitulated and backed up. Probably due to the fact the Hummer Douche has 0 visibility behind him.

When I got home I started devouring my sushi. I finally heard back from my lawyer. He submitted the last of the evidence for my appeal. And I was finally able to confirm he got the records of my ECT treatments from 20 years ago. I worked so hard to get those. At first, they forgot to send all records before 2011. I had to call back and figure that out. They shipped them and they didn't arrive until a week before we had to file. Everything was so last minute and my anxiety has been... palpable. It felt like when I did my science fair project on Sunday night.

He's hoping to get a decision at the beginning of next year. He warned me that these appeals are usually rejected. And that the most effective method of approval was a hearing in front of an administrative law judge. But that could be delayed by up to a year. So I might need to figure out how to survive until 2025. As long as my brother does what he is legally required to do, I should be okay. But counting on that also gives me palpable anxiety.

And that was my day.

Every time I go out is always an adventure.

But remember...

BE NICE. EAT YOUR VEGGIES. PET CUTE DOGS. DREAM BIG. KEEP YOUR TIRES WARM... FOR REASONS. 5 LIFE LESSONS -Froggie, Mildly Famous Internet Person

[blueberry-pride]

Referring to this~

OMG! I read the Q&A but IS IT TRUE? Im so excited 😳👉👈 Ummmm may i req then? Not for the event, but just a general req 😌 A scenario/hcs of Leona with fem!s/o where s/o needs comfort & gets spoiled cz she's having burnout due to all of the incidents on NRC~ I hope this is not too much, if u want to change the plot it's ok, thank u & have a nice day 😳✨

I See Right Through You...

Leona x FEM! S/O

warnings: leaning on to very angsty, cursing, personal issues

Berry: I'M FINALLY BACK AA-💀 just wrapped up some things and you should have some of the requests from the events roll around within the month or so 😣 I changed a bit of it but the overall theme is the same just something that hits a little too close to home ;=; Special Thanks to my lovely friends Len and Luna who helped me out with this one ❤️❤️

"This isn't me wanting some semblance of pity, You can keep it for all I care- I'm so goddamn tired but did I ever ask to be in Twisted Wonderland? Oh don't get me started..." "Did I ask to be Crowley's clean up crew? Did I ask to be in the middle of every. fucking. issue?"

"Sometimes I'd like to be the damsel-but sevens forbid the woman wanting to be saved from all the stupid stress of this world."

"Well I'm so sorry for complaining over a job I didn't ask for but hey- we're in a magical school full fun and dreams, cuz that's sure to make up for ALL the unnecessary emotional and physical labor!" Your voice cracked as you forced a cheery smile.

Leona wasn't expecting you to snap at him when he wanted to mess with you for just a little bit. He had observed you from afar for quite some time now. And most importantly, he wasn't a stranger to people putting up a face for other's sake.

His emerald gaze would glint over your figure as he studies the creases in your eyes from all the work you've been doing. He'd always wondered how much you could take, often times giving you snarky or witty advices in hopes to get you out of your doormat cycle.

He admitted what the Head-mage was doing is a bit too far. He was kinda impressed on how you pushed on with that fiery and stubborn heart of yours.

A sadistic part of him wanted to see when you'll break

He wanted to see you bite back

He anticipated it even more when multiple students come to you for help increased by the day;

You nodded along as Ace and Deuce were once again asking help in doing their chores back at Heartslabyul, you laughed it off as one of their usual antics.

You happily agreed when Kalim invited you to one of his many celebrations despite just finished with your cleanup at Ramshackle, your smile didn't reach you. Those glassy eyes of yours, shifting downwards to hide the reluctance.

It was an asshole move of him in all honesty.

Not lending out a helping a hand but he knew you were capable. For fuck's sake you got him AND his dorm to help you out during Azul's little "tantrum".

He wanted you to overcome this on your own. However, he had an oversight on how much you can take on the world alongside his bullshit attempt of support.

Leona had happened to pass by a class with the door wide open, his lions ears perked at the ongoing conversation.

"Phyn, you're in our group." One student spoke up. "Oh hell yeah, thanks dude!" Another cheered, followed by the sound of a high-five.

"-And I guess that's everyone.. Oh (Y/N)..hmm I guess you and Grim would be a duo, every other's group is already filled up." "Uh.." You chuckled with a loppy smile. "No worries, at least I get to stay in my dorm this time." The class chuckled at your comment and nodded along. As the groups filed out chatting amongst each other, he took lighter steps walking closely behind you.

It wasn't until you reached the entrance of Ramshackle is when you finally noticed him. Which led to the situation right now. "Why the long face herbivore, where's the can-do attitude I know and adore~?"

Your hands balled into fists, shaking as tears were running down your eyes.

"This isn't me wanting some semblance of pity, You can keep it for all I care- I'm so goddamn tired but did I ever ask to be in Twisted Wonderland? Oh don't get me started..." "Did I ask to be Crowley's clean up crew? Did I ask to be in the middle of every. fucking. issue?"

'Shit...' He said mentally.

"Let's...do this inside. We don't want anyone gawking at ya like this." He laid a hand behind your back inside and joined you not before he scanned the area for any curious on-lookers.

He leaned against the side of the wall of the living room, listening to your continued rant. Throwing hands and even had the strength to throw away the innocent coffee table in the middle, Its legs breaking into splinters as soon as it hit impact onto the cold hard floor. "-WHY IS IT ALWAYS ME WHO HAS TO FIX THINGS?" You exclaimed towards the pillow you threw towards the ground.

"Helping fix things is nice and all.." You sniffled. "But is it really so wrong to want that shit in return?"

He knew it was bad but he wanted to see how far you're flames would burn him. He wanted it to hurt-what you've been going through, he knows he can take it.

"You're ranting to the wrong person, go off on Crowley, yell at your classmates for ignoring ya. Tell that red-head and blue-haired friend of yours to fuck off and do their own stupid chores." "Be fucking selfish for once herbivore, Treat yourself to a nice nap-"

"-Oh what? like you? I'm not you Leona." You retorted back. "For fuck sakes you were born here-you were supposed to exist in this plane of existence while I got chucked out of mine." "You say I exist here but I'm one of the least wanted given my 'cheery' attitude. At the very least I know when to stand my guard." You huffed as you sat on the couch, tears still spilling from your eyes. "Is this your way of helping me? because I could clearly feel the love right now..." Leona let out a dry chuckle as he walked over to you. His imposing figure casts a shadow over you but as you gaze at his eyes, there was a lingering feeling of warmth. "Dont be like me." He shook his head. "Sevens, I hope you don't end up like me, but what I'm trying to say is..." His voiced trailed as he looked at your shaking form.

A memory sliced through him for a second. For a brief moment he saw his little self all those years ago in the visage of you. "In a campus full of these jackasses in NRC-including myself sometimes, I... I see right through you." He awkwardly patted your back. "I know it sucks but don't do that shit to yourself where you thought 'hey, I know who to look for if I'm in a room full of folks I adore, but who would look for me?'" Leona had a distant look as he stared at the broken table in the middle of the dorm. "Look for yourself first, look for that little corner of your room to be selfish with what you want to do. Worry about the details later." You cleared your throat as you steal a soft glance at him "You may not be the best and most unlikely to look for advice." The air seemed to change as the both of you share a soft laugh. "But you get right to the point...even though you could've done something much earlier." "What's the fun in that?" He raised an eyebrow. "Besides, You don't need a king's help in chess, a queen...has all the moves she needs."

Leona was surprised to hear your melodic laughter, belting out through your still falling tears at his small comment. "Oh my God Leona you did not just-" You wiped a tear as you smiled at him. He felt a flutter in his chest from the way you're looking at him now. "Well you did just say, I'm not the best." He smirked.

The tense feeling in his shoulder now dissipated as he settled himself on the couch strangely close to you, a tiny voice inside him wondered why. Seeing you smile even though you just murdered the poor coffee table not too long ago is a sign to him he did his job.

It's certainly weird but it's you. People may not look for you or choose you in a room full other characters from their lives, but you can trust that there's always a lion beastman just out in hallway, willing to stand with you through it all.

[jennay]

Dreaded Sickness

Request:

Hi!! I love your writing so much. It's so refreshing to see some fluff. I was wondering if you could do something where the reader has a cold or the flu, and Noah takes care of them. I've been a lil stuffy lately and feel like this would be super cute. 💕

Word Count: 1800ish

Noah Sebastian x reader

No warnings.

Noah Master List

An: hope you enjoy this! I tried not to sound too cliché. Let me know what you think💜

Being sick was your worst nightmare. You took vitamins regularly, washed your hands constantly, and wore masks at work.

You avoided touching door handles; if you ever heard someone was sick, you would avoid contact with them.

Noah found it humorous and often teased that you needed to be put in one of those plastic hamster balls, and he would carry you around.

He'd never seen you sick for the three years you had been dating, so it was all new to him when you left work early and texted him: I'm dying.

He saw you this morning when you left, and you looked ok. He assumed you got the sniffles and were overreacting, but when he saw you in the bedroom with the blankets covering every inch of your body, concern rushed to his core.

"Oh, babe." He whispers, sitting at the edge of the bed; his hand falls to your shoulder. A frown on his lips when he hears you struggling to breathe. He gently sets his hand on your forehead, gauging your body's temperature.

Your eyes flutter open at his touch, "Hey." You quietly groan while pushing yourself into a seated position. What a mistake that was; your body feels heavy, and sitting up feels like a chore. All the blood rushed to your head, making you feel like passing out.

Noah wraps his tattooed arm around your body, bracing for the impact of you against his chest. "What happened to you?" He asks, running his fingers through the ends of your hair.

You sigh, "I feel like shit, and everything hurts." You gently pull out of his arms and collapse back on the bed. You pull the blankets back to your face and close your eyes.

"Are you just stuffed up?" He lies beside you on the blankets, propped up on his elbow to observe you. You look a little flushed, your lips are dry from breathing through your mouth, and your eyes are a bit puffy from rubbing them.

"I don't know." You whisper, turning on your side to face the wall. You feel his hand rub your back soothingly.

"Do you want to try a bath? I can get it started." He offers.

"I don't think I can walk there." You softly say. "I don't even know if I have control over my limbs right now."

Noah chuckles, "Good thing I've had lots of practice carrying you around." He sits up and walks over to the bathroom that connects to your room. "I'll be right back."

You hear the water turn on, and Noah hums while waiting there. You're grateful for him and don't want to be rude, but part of you wants him to let you sleep.

You can only imagine what he's filling the tub up with. Bubbles, bath salts, bath bombs…there was a wide variety to choose from, but knowing him, he would overdo it. You were too tired to care. You hear the water turn off, and his footsteps gradually get closer.

"Ready?" He asks, slowly pulling the blankets down your body. "Do you want me to carry you?" He doesn't give you time to answer before he slips an arm under your back and the other under your legs, pulling you to the edge of the bed.

It always surprised you when he picked you up without an issue, no groans, no sighing, and no complaints.

You wrap your arms loosely around his neck, "It's so cold."

He frowns, feeling your body shiver against him. "I know, babe. It's only for a second." He brushes his lips against your forehead. "You're going to be ok. I promise. I'm here."

Noah lowers you to the floor, and a groan escapes your lips as the cold tile chills your skin. He removes your clothes, flings them aside, and then offers you his hand. You cling to him as he guides you into the bathtub.

You sigh as the heat wraps around you, soothing your aching body. You were reluctant to do this, but you're thankful Noah convinced you.

The water feels smooth and gentle, with lavender bubbles and elderberry oils nourishing your skin.

Noah squats beside you, his brown eyes sparkling with happiness as he watches you rest your head and close your eyes. He feels proud of himself for giving you some relief.

He loves seeing you happy and relaxed; it makes him happy, too. He thinks about how lucky he is to have you in his life. He never thought he'd find such a connection with someone, but here you were, constantly making him realize the amount of love he could truly feel for someone. “Do you need anything else?” He wonders aloud.

You shake your head slightly. “No, but can you stay in here?” You ask him softly. "I feel like I'm going to fall asleep, and I don't want to drown." You think about how lucky you are to have him in your life, how much easier life has been with him by your side. The comfort he gives you, how much love he shows you.

You think about how he always knows what to say or do to make you feel better, to make you laugh, to make you smile, to make you feel safe. You think about how he’s everything you ever wanted, everything you ever needed, everything you ever dreamed of.

He sits on the tile and leans back against the wall, “Of course.” He says without any hesitation.

A smile pulls at your lips, “I’m glad you found me.” You whisper.

He chuckles, watching you sink deeper into relaxation, “I’m glad I found you too.”

He smiles at you with a nostalgic look in his eyes. “Do you remember the first time we met?” He asks you, thinking about the moment that changed everything.

You had caught his attention on Instagram with a video you recorded singing. He wanted to collaborate with you on a duet. He sent you a message and asked you politely. You replied and declined him firmly. You told him that his music wasn’t suitable for your voice and that you didn’t have the experience he was looking for.

He didn’t give up, though. He kept sending you messages and trying to persuade you. He complimented your voice and your style. He told you how much he admired your talent and your passion. He said he had a perfect song for you and would love to hear you sing it with him.

You resisted his charm for two more months, but he was persistent and persuasive. You finally agreed to give him a chance, but you warned him that he would regret wasting his time.

The moment he saw you in person, his life changed.

You walked into the studio with a confident smile and a casual outfit. You wore jeans and a T-shirt that showed off your curves. You had your hair in a ponytail and sunglasses on your head. You looked calm and relaxed like you did this every day.

He was stunned by your beauty and your charisma. He felt his heart skip a beat and his mouth go dry. He greeted you warmly and introduced you to his producer and his bandmates.

They were all friendly and welcoming. You shook their hands and complimented their work. You made them laugh with your jokes and your wit. He could tell they liked you instantly.

He led you to the recording booth and handed you a pair of headphones and a microphone. He explained the song he had written for you and played a demo for you. It was a romantic ballad with a catchy chorus, the complete opposite of what you'd heard from him. You listened attentively and nodded along. You liked the melody and the lyrics. You told him it was a beautiful song and you were honored to sing it with him.

He pressed the record button and signaled you to start. You took a deep breath and sang the first verse with your powerful voice. It was sweet and soulful, full of emotion and expression. He joined you in the chorus, and you felt yourself melt at the sound of his voice. You harmonized perfectly and felt a spark between you.

The song ended, and he clapped his hands enthusiastically. He praised your performance. You had a few hours of goofing off but also moments of seriousness.

You followed him to the control room, where he played the song for you, and you both listened with admiration. It sounded like magic. You felt proud of what you had created together.

Noah admitted to you he had been following your Instagram for a long time and that he was a big fan of your voice. He said he had always wanted to work with you and was glad you finally agreed. He said he had enjoyed every moment of singing with you and that he felt a special connection with you. He asked you out the next day.

"I thought I was going to pass out." Noah laughs, "Can you believe that was three years ago?" He asks you.

You nod, "Best three years of my life. Thanks for continuing to try." You softly say. You slowly sit up in the bath and blink your eyes a few times, ready to get up, a yawn falling from your lips. "Can you hand me the towel?"

Noah stands up and grabs the towel, reaching for your hand to help you step out. He wraps the towel around your body and leads you to the room. "Go sit." He says, pointing to the bed; he walks away to the dresser and grabs you some fresh clothes, bending down in front of you. He starts at your legs and walks to your top, sliding your shirt over your body. He gently kisses your nose, making you giggle. "I love you." He quietly says.

"I love you too. Thank you for being so thoughtful."

Noah shrugs as you get back under the blanket and curl on the pillows. "You make it easy." He tucks the blankets under your body, making sure you won't get cold. He sits next to you, crawling in bed and pulling you close to him. He kisses your temple, "I want you to get some rest, OK?"

You nod, "I'll try to sleep, but don't go too far, please." You softly say, snuggling into his chest. "I'm scared I'm not going to wake up."

Noah smiles, melting at the idea of you needing him. "You're going to be ok, princess. I'll be right here when you wake up." He closes his eyes, getting comfortable beside you, drifting into a peaceful slumber.

He hopes that when you wake up, this nightmare will be over, but until then he will lay here keeping you safe in his arms.

[anyaeras]

The Helpful Neighbors || WandNat x reader

Pairing- Dom!Natasha SoftDom!Wanda x y/n

Summary- y/n learn something new about themselves, coming out with their sexuality after some help from the married couple next-door

Warnings- Smut, Dom!Sub ish, legal!ageGap, Strap!on , Face!sitting , oral , cunnalinges , praise!kink , mommy!kink , daddy!kink , coming out , tit!play , making!out (AFAB reader)

Masterlist My  server

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It was mid July, in Westview, New Jersey. y/n was attending college in New York, at New York university, but they were home for the summer brake, well home alone that is, y/n's family had taken their younger sibling on a vacation and y/n was left home to house sit, but it wasn't all bad it was nice to be around town again, living at home alone, isn't as lonely as it might sound, but that was all because of the neighbors next-door. y/n spending a lot of time recently helping them with basic chores that they just needed help with and not once did y/n bat an eye, they were always happy to help.

Today wasn't much different then most, y/n woke up around a little bit before noon after going out with some friends the night prior, a little hungover but that would fade after having some breakfast, making their way to the kitchen, finding a box of their families fruity, Sugarfield cereal before heading to the cabinet, heading for a bowl to prepare the cereal.

The day was quiet, sitting on the couch and turning on some mindless reality TV show waste their time while eating their cereal. With that time did go by but still not to much time, around 2pm y/n heard a knock on their door, standing up to check out who it may be.

"Hello?" Y/n said with a question in their voice before fully opening the door to see who it was, yet upon fully opening the door they were met with one of their neighbors, it was wanda, she was a sweet women, she was a definitely older than you, but not as old as your parents, you wanted to say early 30s at most.

"Y/n?" wanda called your name as it seemed you zoned out, y/n didn't even realize how caught up they were thinking about their neighbor, but just something about her...

"Oh sorry, I'm a bit tired" you responded sluggishly

"It's alright honey, I was wondering if you'd mind coming over for dinner tonight, you've been so helpful while your parents have been away my wife and I would like to do something nice for you" Wanda asked with a soft welcoming smile on her face.

You nodded in return agreeing to meet her at her house around 6pm for dinner, you could never turn down a free meal and besides, it would be nice to not eat dinner alone. After that Wanda left you be for a bit, heading home to clean up and prepare the meal, while y/n was cleaning themself up, heading for a shower to wash last nights club of themself.

Hopping into the warm water, letting in drip down their body as they thought, it's been sometime sense y/n had been in a relationship, the last one was the end of high school senior year, y/n was with some basic jock. He was fun and all, but they never had any real connection it was more like close friends then lovers. Y/n never seem to be attracted to the guy, there was no emotional connection or much of physical attraction it was more just a silly the bond between the two.

Letting their thoughts run would be a waste of time y/n could think about the past for hours maybe days, but what was the point, so with that they finally pulled themself from the warm comforts of the shower, to get dressed for tonight's dinner.

As it got later in the day and closer to the dinner y/n was starting to get nervous, why? Who knew maybe just social anxiety ,Settling for a cute and comfortable outfit, and light makeup y/n grab their phone and keys, slipping on some shoes and heading next door at 5:55 to the Maximoff-Romanov family, knock on the door softly, almost hoping they didn't open the door, you don't know why, but tonight felt different, you've always enjoyed both of their company but now something felt off.

Yet they heard the knock...

"Y/n дорогой (Dorogoy/Darling), come in" Natasha answered before step out of the way, allowing you to come threw the door, before leading you to the dinning room where Wanda was setting up the food for the night.

"Welcome y/n have a seat" wanda said softly before speaking to her wife threw their eyes, honestly, couldn't tell if it was telepathic or what, but they were having a full conversation there without even saying a word a word.

Dinner started normal the food was amazing, and it was just basic conversation until more personal questions started to be thrown y/n's way.

"So y/n, are you seeing anyone?" Wanda asked quite bluntly, causing you to choke on your soda, not only did the question take you off guard, y/n was also a little upset that they were not aloud wine like the other two, as you were only 20, back to the question asked y/n took a minute to the think about how to answer it but went with the simple answer.

"Oh nope, I don't have anyone special" your answer brought a smile to the couples face, as the questions continued y/n started to look distressed and so confused, they didn't know why they were longing for the two in front of them, they've never been in this kind of situation, it's always been awkward conversations with men.

"Y/n hun come with us" Wanda's said before giving you her hand and leading you to the living room, letting you sit on the couch, before the two older women sat beside you.

"What's in your mind, you can tell us sweetheart" the older witch asked you while Natasha placed a hand on your thigh as a form of comfort yet to y/n I was more. Was it more?

"I-I don't know I shouldn't feel like this" y/n was stressing out over their own feeling while Natasha was confused. Your loud thoughts were screaming at Wanda clearing up some of the confusion for the witch.

"Feel like what детка" (Detka/Baby) Natasha asked prompting you to open up to the older women. While Wanda was more so just listing at this point waiting for you to confirm her suspension vocally.

"Attracted to you guys I guess" y/n stated in almost a whisper but they both heard it.

"And why would that be an issue" Natasha pushed her luck at this one. As there was no doubt, the older women wanted more from the younger girl, besides they saw no issue with opening there marriage up to another partner.

"Cause it's wrong, you guys are married, plus I've only ever been with men, I don't even know how it works with a women" y/n admitted to the two.

"Y/n, do you believe you only like men"

Y/n shrugged at the question

"May I kiss you" Wanda asked to which y/n nodded and with that Wanda's lips met y/n's

"Oh." Was all that came from y/n with the kiss broke between the two

"Y/n it's alright to like women, and to like multiple people at once, Natasha and I like having a third, and wouldn't mind if you wanted to try something with us honey" Wanda explained yet the couple was growing inpatient with the younger one, they knew y/n needed them, yet they also wanted y/n to realize that on their own.

"Oh okay...I wanna" y/n gave consent, giving themself to the couple, y/n wanted to explore more then just men, and more then just one person.

It was Natasha turn to pull y/n into herself before going for a kiss, both the women were excited for y/n to agree, they wanted to make the sweet collage girl theirs, Natasha took dominance over the kiss, making it much deeper then the kiss with Wanda was, letting her tongue slip into y/n's mouth, the kiss wasn't broken until they both were desperate for air, and Wanda would have to admit she was getting a bit turned on by watching her wife put her tongue down y/n's throat. Wanda wanted in on the fun, so she used her powers to flash some imagines threw their mind of the married couple pulling a soft moan from the younger one, causing Natasha to chuckle.

"Oh is someone turned on?" Wanda teased ready to show y/n a good time. Wanda gave Nat the okay to left y/n up before heading to the bedroom, setting y/n down on the bed they both were now standing over them.

"Y/n are you okay with this, we want to take care of you sweet girl" Wanda asked for y/n's consent while Natasha also waited for It.

"Yes please, I need you both" y/n whined out, taking that as enough consent Wanda went to get some stuff, while Natasha stayed with y/n.

"Princess, if you wanna stop at any time say red, do you understand"

"Yes."

Wanda came back into view with some toys in her hands, handing off a harness and a large dildo to Natasha before pushing you to lay back onto the bed.

"Sweet sweet y/n, this is gonna be fun, why don't you strip for mommy" Wanda said softly giving y/n a moment to remove their clothes, as Wanda stripped herself of her sun dress she had been wearing threw the day, Wanda started kissing y/n softly before deepening the kiss, holding the kiss for sometime before moving down to y/n's neck leaving love bites along the way pulling soft moans from y/n as she hit their sweet spot.

Natasha now stripped with a good sized strap between her legs came back over as her wife was still sucking on Y/n, Natasha pinched y/n's tits just to see the reaction, watching the smaller one squirm underneath the couple was so hot to the Russian, just to have that power did things to the women.

Wanda pulled herself away from y/n standing next to her wife, as they watched y/n desperately wait on them.

Natasha slipped her fingers threw your folds collecting your juices on her fingers before pulling your jaw open and slipping her fingers I to y/n's mouth, letting them taste themself on the Russian.

"Good girl, so sweet for us детка" Wanda praised, as Natasha pulled back, moving down to y/n's core lining up her faux cock with y/n's dripping core. Slowly slipping in.

"Please be careful I've never done it like this..." y/n admitted causing them to pause.

"Y/n what do you mean baby?" Natasha soften up for just a moment to get information.

"I've done it! Just never like this" y/n said softly yet still prompting both women to continue. Natasha kept slipping in yet rubbing her hand on y/n's lower stomach as a form of comfort while Wanda was giving attention to their tits, kissing and sucking on y/n's chest as Natasha slowly started to fuck them slowly, the other part of the faux cock slipped into Natasha pushing a bit of pressure of her own clit. While Natasha started to pick up speed, y/n's moans grew louder and as a way to shut y/n up Wanda settled herself above y/n's face setting down so y/n could eat her out as Natasha fucked her.

"Look at you eating out mommy so good" Natasha stated picking up her thrust, causing y/n to scream under Wanda cause heavy vibration to send Wanda over the edge, Wanda came on y/n's face before pulling herself, off y/n, giving the younger one a deep kiss tasting herself on her.

Natasha was trusting faster, chasing her own high as she pulled an orgasm from y/n causing them scream as Natasha also came. Giving y/n a moment to calm down before pulling out.

Wanda came over to her wife pulling her in for a kiss, sharing a moment while giving y/n a moment. Natasha pushed Wanda away for a moment to strip from the harness strap setting down at the end of the bed.

"Show daddy how much you enjoyed how I fucked you" Natasha wrapped her hands into y/n's hair pulling them to eat out Natasha, mixing Wanda's flavors from earlier now with Natasha's was heavenly, both flavors from the women danced on y/n's tongue, while Wanda sat on the bed, kissing and loving on her wife, as grunts and deep moans came from Natasha while both girls worked on bringing Nat to her climax.

"Fuck you guys, so good for daddy" Natasha prompt with a groan, as she was growing closer to her own high.

"Fuck...fuck" Natasha moaned loudly still holding y/n's hair tightly keeping y/n secure between her legs, while she let go spilling her cum on to y/n's face.

When she finally relaxed her hand from y/n's hair, y/n slowly stepped to her feet, waiting a moment before crawling on the bed towards the other two. Natasha and Wanda both sat back in the bed, pulling y/n into their lap, her body in Natasha's lap while her legs draped over Wanda's body

"Are you alright honey" Wanda asked teaching over to brush some loose hair from y/n's face.

"Yes" y/n replied sluggishly a bit tired from the Amazing sex she just had with her (older married) neighbors

"Want to stay with us tonight?" Natasha asked getting a quick nod from y/n as the snuggled closer to Natasha, making it clear they weren't leaving. The couple just held y/n closer enjoying the new side with the younger one.

"Does this make me gay?" Y/n asked thinking aloud making both the women laugh.

"If you want to be, then yes love, you are gay" Natasha respond wrapping an arm around y//n

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AN- this was a  request from another app, with that I hope you guys enjoy. 

[harrysmimi]

Little Lad

Synopsis: One where Harry has to take care of his baby on his own for the first time

More of my work

Little Emir was just nine months old and already a big mama's boy.

Harry was very jealous of that really, both ways, that little stole away his wife, and he clearly loves his mum more. But he also cherishes that, seeing his bany have such and amazing relationship with his Mummy already.

YN owned one of the most busy and known Bakery Cafe in the city, which meant her being busy with work most of the time though she still made time for her family. She had a last minute client come in with a huge wedding cake request, which her and her team of course did not deny. But that meant she sad to spend all night at bakery to het the order ready. His anxiety started to settle in when she called in after lunch to tell him she will home very late.

Harry can get through this, right?

He have been on a break since he wife was eight months pregnant. He has been there tending to his little lad along with bis wife. But god did he not except for a full breakdown from his nine month old boy.

All day Harry spent his time, cleaning up after the little boy. It seemed this much when he'd gotten so used to help of his wife. The laundry was a hassle. Washing up the poopy diaper and tiny clothes without anyone by his side.

He had Emir sat by the side on a little blanket with his toys to keep him busy as he did the laundry and dishes for the day. Hearing his little baby talk.

"What are you doing?" He asked, watching his lad be all fascinated by this new toy his mum got him, wood measuring spoons which he could chew on too. He threw it across the room, bunch of spoons went straight to the electronic appliances and started crawling his way to the toy. Harry didn't understand his play time one bit. "No, don't go there!" He picked him back up and fetched his toys.

But is Emir going to listen? He's a little baby!

It happened once, twice, thrice. Harry gave up and moved up all the appliances on the counter. Did it make a huge mess in the kitchen? Yes! At least his little boy isn't going to hurt himself.

There were house chores he had to get all done so his wife can come home and rest after working for hours and hours straight. Being a pastry chef is hard enough. He just wanted to help but he couldn't when he has a baby who is full of energy and adrenaline being introduced to his new toys this week.

Emir takes up after him for that, he would agree.

Harry's the same whilst on stage performing to his fans.

But this was exhausting for him to do everything on his own, plus his anxiety was doing nothing but add fuel to the fire. The boy kept running into things or getting himself stuck in things. He never noticed how easy it is to have another person around to help. It's usually him and his wife doing all the mundane things together, it is easy that way as there is always someone with a baby who had just learned to crawl. And he's a quick crawler.

Harry was becoming more and more tired having to run around after him, or calm him down after very fifteen minutes when he'd go to wash some dishes or get the laundry all sorted, or get the cats fed and clean up their litter boxes. Or when he prepared for dinner for himself and the boy.

Emir had a nappy burst when Harry thought he had gotten five minutes to sit down and breathe. The bath time was traumatising, with Emir screaming and crying for no reason. That's when Harry realised it was long after his nap time and he was sleepy and tired and hungry as well.

"It's okay my love, Papa's here for you." He assured his little boy after he had calmed himself down, which wasn't for more than three minutes. "I love you." Harry wiped his teary eyes with the pads of his thumbs, wrapped him up in a towel burrito before taking him to the master bedroom. He got the little lad dressed in his sleep onesie and brought him downstairs.

"I'm so sorry, Papa is having a hard time with your Mumma gone." He shared as he had him settled into his highchair, "I'm trying my very best, I promise." He felt bad.

Seeing Emir's tired eyes teary, as he was almost dozing off to sleep without having been eaten, it was his fault that he couldn't look after his son when his wife is stuck at work. Only if he could keep track of time properly and have fed him first than getting distracted by cooking and cleaning and doing the laundry. He felt a heavy pit in his stomach of guilt.

"Come on, Emir eat up then we can go to bed." Harry was feeding the little boy his dinner. He was all strapped up in his high chair, busy playing babbling and smacking his hands on the table still tired and worm out to the fullest.

"Mumma-mumma-mumma." He started his squealing. He learned to call both his parents recently.

"Mummy is working, my baby," Harry talked to him, "is that good?" He cooed watching him take a bite of the little rice porridge he made from YN's mum's recipe. "I know it's not as good as your mum makes it, but we can make it due."

His phone started ringing, "oh look, it's your mummy!" Harry answered the face time call from YN and perched up his phone against Emir's water bottle.

"Hello boys!" YN chirped. Harry saw she was kneading some pink fondant. "Are my lads doing lad things that lads do cause lads are cool?" Harry laughed at that.

"Mamma!" Emir squealed.

"Hello my love, are you eating your dinner?" YN said.

"I don't know how you do this." Harry spoke up.

"What?"

"Feed him, he's so wiggly!" Harry exclaimed trying to give Emir another little spoon full of food. "See! This is why I took up on bottle feeding." YN just laughed. Harry's very afraid to spoon feed him because he's afraid that the metal cutlery is going to hurt his boy somehow. He loves to sit with his with a bottle of milk or formula, that's a good bonding activity as well.

"I probably sound like a horrible person, but — Emir come on, darling!" Harry was close to having a breakdown.

"Harry, it's okay, love. You're doing good he just looks a bit tired." He watched her take her phone and head out of the kitchen telling her employees what to do next whilst she talked for a minute on the call. "It's okay!"

"I don't know, I've been anxious all day." He shared, "you do it all so flawlessly."

Honestly she doesn't. He had seen her make mistakes too but she knows how to quickly move on and fix her mistakes. He didn't know how she does that, really. He reckons it's because she lived with her older brother who's got three kids here in London until she married. She always talked about baby sitting the babies when her brother and his wife would go out, for work or whatever it was.

"And that's okay, okay?" She assured him, "I am so sorry I can't come back home right now. You're already doing so good."

"I hope so, he hasn't eaten anything, I forgot to put him down for a nap earlier as I got caught up with the chores." Harry pouted still trying his best to have his little boy fed. "What do I do!?"

"Harry, look at me," she demanded so he did, "play with him for a bit and then try again. If that doesn't work then give him some formula."

"Okay." He nodded. Emir knocked off the bowl of rice, spilling it all over himself. "Oh god, I'm gonna cry!"

The little boy started laughing finding it humourous.

"Yeah, you find it funny huh?" Harry scoffed. Can he be mad at that adorable face? He placed a kiss on his boy's head.

"Anyway, Harry I'll be home after midnight so please don't wait up for me okay?" YN shared.

"Do you have too much work?" Harry looked concerned looking at his tired wife. Yeah, she hasn't been working that much since Emir's birth, but the breast feeding and everything which comes post delivery was taking a toll on her, physically. He hated to see that. He felt bad to even ask that question.

"No, almost done here." She shared, looking down at her work station, "just a handful of things to sort out then, Jay and Kat will be delivering the cake tomorrow at the venue."

"Okay, drive home, yeah?"

"Mhmm, I will." She nodded, "please don't be hard on yourself. Give him some formula and he'll be off to sleep."

"Yeah. I love you."

"I love you too!" YN blew a kiss each to both her boys before she hung up.

"You're a proper lad, aren't you?" Harry sighed and scooped up his son out of his highchair carefully. "Being so rowdy today."

Emir just laughed and shied away, hiding in his dad's chest. Harry chuckled and brought him in the kitchen with him, propping the baby on his hip he made a bottle of formula. "Let's go lounge on the sofa, hmm?"

Harry got comfy with his baby on the sofa, draping the fluffy throw on the boy to keep him warm. Emir just lied on his chest having his meal all sleepy yet it didn't seem like he wanted to sleep.

"Mumma!" He squealed looking at his dad.

"No, baby I'm Papa." Harey laughed. "Can you say Papa?"

"Papa!" He squealed again.

"Yay!" Harry celebrated, pressing sloppy kisses on his chubby cheeks. "I'm really sorry, my love. I was having a bad day today." He felt guilty for having him wait up for dinner. "I hope you aren't mad at me. Mumma is a really good help, isn't she? But she's stuck at work today. I know we shouldn't rely on her but this was the first time were together, isn't it? We had a lads day in today. Well, more like you had a proper lad day. Where did you get all the energy from, hmm?"

Emir just sighed dramatically, resting his head back on his dad's chest. All snuggled up he was starting to fall asleep.

Harry adores his little boy. He worried the day he was born because he didn't had that love-at-first-sight connection with him. It took him time to learn about him. His little boy was a new human and he felt like he needed to get to know him first, but there was no doubt he would protect the little bundle of joy with his life. It took some time to make peace with it all, that it was okay to feel that way.

Now they're both inseparable. Even though Emir is more of his Mumma's boy, he still manages to have fun with his Papa.

Today just added to that all that guilt for him.

The next thing Harry knew was feeling gentle taps on his arm. "Harry, do you wanna go sleep in our bed?" It was his wife he found when he finally opened his eyes and found his boy missing.

"Where did Emir go?" He panicked.

"I put him in his cot." She shared, "do you wanna go upstairs and get comfortable?"

"Yeah, sorry I fell asleep here." He sighed, "when did you get back?"

"Just fifteen minutes ago."

"Hmm, let's go upstairs and sleep. I am so tired." He got up to follow after her, "did you manage to get the order done?"

"Yeah, we did." She yawned making him giggle, "sorry I'm very tired."

"So am I, love." He draped his arm around her waist, tuck her closer to him.

"How did your day go?"

"Oh, don't ask!" He sighed dramatically. "I still feel bad, you know." He was walking straight to bed giving her space to go get ready to join him but, she stopped him.

"It's okay, Harry." She cooed, "come sit here. Please?"

"Come on." He walked her to their bed.

"You don't have to feel bad, okay? I know you tried your best, he knows you did." She assured him, stood in between his thighs to hug him.

"But I don't know if he ate properly." His voice was low as he sniffled, his face buried in her chest. "I got so distracted."

"Harry he's a baby, he'll wake us up if he's hungry." She said, running her fingers through his hair, "you know it's okay to make mistakes I'm sure he isn't even going to remember anything in the morning. We'll do one thing, let's bring him over to sleep in our bed tonight, yeah?"

Harry doesn't like that. He'd insisted on sleep training their baby since he turned six months old, but he agreed today.

"Yeah!" He nodded.

"Harry? You're crying?" She cooed and bent down to look at him. "It's okay, I promise."

"I, I know. I just can't help it." He chuckled sheepishly. YN smiled and wiped away his tears with her sweater paws, press a few sloppy kisses on his either of cheeks.

"I brought made your favourite cake pops." She reminded him, "kept them away in the fridge for you."

"You did?" His face lit up instantly.

"Mhmm." She nodded, "the ones with chocolate cake and coffee butter cream."

"Oh I love you so much!" With his arms wrapped around her middle he pulled her down, flipping them over he buried her down in the mattress.

"Oh my..." She laughed, "I should have told you that earlier."

"Yeah!" He agreed. "You should have!" Lifting his head up from her neck to look at her, he pressed sloppy wet kisses all over her face.

"Now don't go eat them all cuz I used a lot of coffee in it." She explained, "you won't be sleeping tonight then."

"I'll go bring our little lad in then, leave you to relax and do your skincare and stuff." He gave her another peck on the mouth before he lifted himself off her.

"Mhmm."

When YN returned from taking a shower and doing her skincare, he found her boy fast asleep. Emir lied on his side in the middle spooning his small teddy tucked under his arms. Harry lied just behind him with his hand rested on his little tummy.

......................................................................

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[janaknandini-singh999]

After Krishna left for Dwarka, Radha used to keep herself a lot busier than usual; doing her chores back in Vrindavan, talking to the trees finding Krishna in everything, taking care of the people and animals. At night she would go to her room and sit in front of the mirror, sigh and take out her shringaar. Tonight, as soon as she looked into her reflection, it was her Kanha smiling at her.

"How's Dwarka dheesh doing?" she carefully kept her tone as teasing, afraid that if he suspects even a little bit of sadness then he will come running to her right away, leaving everything behind

"Oh please, Radhe. You should come sometime, you used to before but you barely do now."

Radha cupped Kanha's cheek in the mirror

"My sweet mohana, you know I can't. It's my duty to give you and your ashtabharya all the space and love," laughing, she added a little wistfully "As it is I don't really have a good reputation out here. Krishna's lover. But why? Krishna has millions of lovers. The whole brahmaand is his lover. Why worship one exclusively with him? If he loves all his lovers equally then why just worship this Radha with him? She isn't even his wife. Unlike Mahadev and Parvati, they aren't even legitima-"

"Radhe." Krishna stopped her with tears in his eyes

Radha, hurting as much as him, apologized and continued "but it is true, my love. People only view love as black or white. They think marriage is sanctity when it is the bond that is. Not the label."

Nodding, Krishna whispered "do you miss me?"

She laughed till there were tears in her eyes too "Oh Kanha, you are everywhere I look. Every time I breathe."

"Then why talk to me like this? Why summon me here?"

"Because you are everywhere. Everywhere but right here."

Kanha's eyes softened "I am within you, sakhi. Always."

Nodding and smiling, she looked away to wipe her tears "yes yes, I know that." she looked back in Kanha's eyes "only if I could somehow tell that to Yashoda maiya, Nand baba and all the gopiyan and people here. Maiya is inconsolable, kanha. She cries and says 'that boy always tricks me. I saw the universe in his mouth when he was a child. Now wherever I look, I see him. But I just want him to come steal my makhan. Kanha, where are you? I promise I'll never scold you.'

Krishna touches the mirror ever so gently

"Kanha, they think you are not real when you are everywhere. They think it's an illusion and all they do is weep."

"But they forgot that Maya is Krishna and Mohana is Krishna. Everything that involves krishna is as real as the morpankh falling from the sky quietly into their palms when they think of Him." Radha and krishna whisper at the same time

"Tomorrow the Pandavas and Kauravas fight and I'm Arjuna's saarthi. After killing Kansa mama, the trajectory of my life has changed completely. But I miss Vrindavan, Kishori. I honestly don't even know what to do. They call me God but forget I'm a human in this avatar too. All I can feel is Gandhari's pain. Even if she hates me with everything she has and cursed me for my existence but I just can't help but feel for her so deeply. What can I do?" he sobs

"What Kauravas did was wrong but Gandhari is a mother, kanha. Her pain can't be measured. It is unbearable but justified. But so is your karma and dharma. Whatever you do will be remembered forever. They all need you. So go, sakha. Do what needs to be done. I believe in you. I love you. We all do."

Krishna smiled through the tears

Radha whispered "we parted physically to fulfill our dharma in this lifetime but you know? I.. I'm just so tired, Kanha. It's been so long. I just want to go home. To Goloka. Our home. I feel my purpose here is coming to an end..."

"So is mine, Radhe.. so is mine. We are One." Kanha clutched the mirror closer to his chest and Radha did too - both of them in an eternal embrace.

"We will go home very soon. To everyone we love, finally. It's my vachan, sakhi."

[sovonight]

waiting (candle event, radri ver, 3k words) ↴

—✧✧✧—

As the light from the window recedes, casting her journal into shadow, Radri sets a candle upon the candle holder on the nightstand, then reaches over the side of the bed, rummaging around in her pack for flint and steel. As she fumbles around for it, Xan glances over from his place beside her, and extends a hand.

"Allow me," he says. With a small gesture and a whisper of a command, the wick catches flame.

"Oh," Radri says, looking up the lit candle, "Thank you."

She abandons her now unnecessary search, and opens her journal once more. Xan glances over again.

"I never found the chance to ask what you write about," he says.

"Mm?" Radri narrowly avoids leaving a blot of ink on the page, and gives her pen a dissatisfied frown, resolving to be more careful. "Normal things, I suppose. What happened today, what quests are in progress, what supplies we expended…."

"A summary of events, then, rather than a collection of personal reflections?" Xan says. "Did you keep such a journal in Candlekeep, as well?"

In Candlekeep? She had never considered it. Imagining it now, her entries would have blended together in their sameness; her days were a mixture of lessons and chores, with the only real variables being the subjects she was taught, and the people around her.

"I didn't keep a journal at all," Radri says. "I was always so tired of writing by the end of each day—the last thing I wanted to do was light a candle and write into the night." She gives her current setup a wry smile.

"But now that I'm gone… there's something comforting about the routine," Radri says. "The scent of paper, the ink… even the flame. Though Candlekeep isn't so full of candles as its name would suggest."

Then she blinks, and lifts her gaze from her journal, glancing over to him.

"I remember seeing that you have a journal, as well. Don't you keep track of similar things?"

"Of our every encounter, foe, and death?" Xan says. "If I dwell too long on what has happened to us, I soon grow astonished at the fact that we are even still alive—and against my will, the mind wanders. I prefer to keep my entries to more pleasant reflections."

"Pleasant reflections?" Radri echoes, curious, "Like what?"

"What else?" Xan says, gazing at her softly. "Thoughts of you, and our love."

—

Radri swirls the liquid wax around in the flat pan of the candle holder, drawing circles around the dying flame. Just as the wick is about to run out, she catches the flame on a fresh one, and sets the new candle beside her closed journal. Her journal entry for the day is complete; she is tired, and she is long due for reverie; and yet, something keeps her awake.

Xan. She sighs, staring into the dull, abandoned pool, watching the wax slowly begin to solidify again. She doesn't know why she's still waiting for him. He prefers to study his spells alone—and she has often fallen into reverie waiting for him to finish—but never so consistently or so often as in these past several days. A shadow has fallen across his dark, gray eyes, and though she lingers in bed, pretending to still be in reverie to ensure he gets all the hours he needs, he hardly looks rested.

When she asks, Xan says nothing. But—she hasn't really asked, has she? Are you alright, is no true substitute for, I'm worried about you. Is something wrong? Is it something I did? Are you avoiding m—

Radri gives her head a sharp shake. No—it does no use to jump to conclusions, and she's been through this dance before. All she has to do is wait for Xan to come tell her everything.

…No, that's not it. The last time she had waited, in just a tenday he had formed a conviction to leave her forever.

Radri stands, sending the candle's flame flickering in the residual breeze of her movement, worry suddenly taking hold in her chest. Her heart is set—she's going to go find him. Xan is probably still at that worn table on the floor below; at this hour, there are none but the stillness and darkness of night to keep him company. Her mind made up, Radri crosses the room in three quick strides, and opens the door—

—And comes face to face with Xan, who stumbles back a step in surprise.

"Radri," Xan gasps. With the glimpse he'd caught of her expression, he sends a cautious glance behind him, before facing her again. "You—you looked as if you were about to storm a dungeon. Are we leaving already?"

Then he looks past her, into the room, where the wax carnage by the candle holder she's been using to stave off the darkness serves as clear evidence of her sleeplessness.

"…Or have you not even rested yet, at all?" Xan looks worriedly down at her. Radri feels, for an instant, abashed to have raised his concern—but no, she has to collect herself. She is worried about him. And she must say it!

"I… I couldn't," Radri says. Yes, a good start—

"I…" she continues, and now, she should ask him now—

"I hadn't yet received your kiss goodnight." NO!

But her excuse has already left her in a nervous rush of words, too late to be swallowed now. Xan, understandably, stares at her—and mentally, she buries her face in her hands. How could her resolve have fled her so quickly?

"I… did not know it was that significant to you," Xan says, slightly puzzled, and it takes her a second to remember what she'd said that he's responding to, "Forgive me for the oversight."

Leaning carefully in, as though partly convinced that she might prove to be an illusion once he touches her, Xan leaves a simple, light kiss on her cheek. When he pulls back away, he seems silently astonished at having confirmed that she is, in fact, real. But Radri's mind holds no room to process this observation; her fingertips rise to touch the kiss he'd placed on her cheek, and her face reddens in embarrassment. He'd… he'd humored her… but perhaps this is the best approach. After all, it's not in her nature to tackle an encounter head-on.

"Are you going to come in and join me?" Radri asks. Though she tries for casual, her voice seems, to her ears, to betray her hours of waiting and doubt. But if Xan thinks the same, it does not show, and he does not refuse her.

Xan moves through his nightly ritual, putting his spellbook upon the nightstand and leaning his moonblade against it, so that he might always have it on hand. Meanwhile, Radri feels as nervous inside as she did the first time they'd shared a room, and finds herself standing still at the foot of the bed, uncertain what to do with her arms.

Xan lays down on the bed, then looks up at her. Perhaps it's just her, or the distance, or the flicker of the candle—but she thinks she sees amusement in his eyes.

"Come here," Xan says fondly, and in that moment, the spell of her nervousness is broken. She hastens over and falls into his arms; Xan's soft, breathy chuckle floats across the top of her head.

"If you were in such a hurry, you need not have waited for me."

She curls up closer, nestling her head against his chest, her ear pressed to his heart. He misunderstands; what she'd waited for is his closeness.

"Will you take my hand?" Radri asks; she misses his company in reverie. Xan sighs.

"I am in no state to show you my memories of Evereska tonight, if that is what you were hoping for."

"I don't want to see, so much as I just want to be with you."

"Well, then, I am already with you." Xan kisses her hair. Her heart clenches, and she tries again.

"Xan… has something been troubling you, lately?"

"I am surprised that you would ask me this," he says. "Many things trouble me, Estel'amin, and at many times." Though his answer is neutral, something beneath it is just slightly tense.

"Does it have to do with me?"

"You are on my mind too often for these troubling thoughts to never lead back to you." But he had hesitated… just barely.

Radri finds her breath caught in her throat. This is the moment; she cannot bear to blurt out any more excuses.

"Is it why you wait for me to fall into reverie, first, before you join me?" Her heart beats so loudly that it nearly drowns out the sound of her own voice in her ears. "I—Is it… why you've been been avoiding me?"

In the aftermath of releasing those words from her mind, she barely registers the fact that Xan's body has stilled, his breath frozen in his chest; her thoughts, many and jumbled, tumble forth, fighting for the chance to form on her tongue.

"I—I'm sorry," Radri finds herself stammering. "After all… it's an uneven arrangement, isn't it? You have such a beautiful city to show me, and I only have books and repetition—the same story, day in and day out. And then I finally left, only to start having these visions… these nightmares. Why would you want to live through them with me? I understand, really. I should never have—"

"Radri."

With one swift movement, she's no longer curled up against his chest, but laying on her back on the bed itself. Xan is leant over her, his arms on either side of her shoulders, his face cast into uneven shadow by the curtain of his hair. She can't help but notice the dark circles beneath his eyes, which are still apparent even in this dim light—but more than that, what strikes her is how pained he looks by her words.

"Is that what you think?"

Radri feels, suddenly, that she's gotten the answer very wrong. She's transported back to Candlekeep: one of her tutors stares at her from the board, tutting at her, as Imoen, sprawled casually at the desk next to hers, signals secretly to her what she should have said instead.

But the Imoen of her mind's eye has no choice but to fade away without helping her; there is nowhere in the world that contains knowledge of what Xan is thinking right now, except for Xan himself.

"What," she says, quietly, "Should I think instead?"

Xan, surprisingly, does not answer immediately. He seems, for the first time in a while, lost for words—though not for a lack of emotion for them to express. She watches his expression shift, from reflection, to frustration, to helplessness, to—

"I have been trying to shield you from my struggles," Xan manages at last, "But I see that I have failed."

Pulling away from her, he continues, "I… I keep having visions."

"I am alone with you on a beautiful glade—and we are ambushed by monsters. I join you in your reverie—and wake up next to your lifeless corpse. I let down my guard, and you are taken from me—" He pauses, taking in a shaky breath, eyes glazed over by the memory, "And there are many more. You cannot imagine the perils my eyes see."

"There were always fears, Radri. Fear of dying, fear of losing you, of hurting you, of dragging you into the void of my lonely, desolate existence… But now they are not simply that: they are live nightmares I cannot escape, and I dread my reverie every night. How can I share it with you, when I know what my mind will show you?" Xan says, and pulls his gaze away from her, bowing his head. "I am lost, Estel'amin. Lost in darkness… and even the candles of your room are not able to drive it away."

Radri begins to reach out to him, but pauses, his words still running through her head. She feels like she's forced this from him; she's sorry to have pushed him. Perhaps, if she'd just observed in silence longer, she could have guessed that this was what troubled him… but she can't help but think back to that first night, when their shared reverie went awry. Even with her tears, her confession, his words, and his comfort, what she remembers above all is relief, to no longer be holding all of her fears inside.

So she brings herself to him, and she holds him close.

"You can show me," Radri says. "I wish I knew what to say to drive this darkness away… I wish I could do for you what you do for me. But I will always be here to listen."

"I want to know everything about you, Tahlimil," she confesses; despite having spoken it in her mind many times, his name is still new on her tongue, and she feels his breath catch to hear it. "Not just your hopes, but your fears. Not just your shining moments of happiness, but your present sorrows. I want to be here with you, through all of it. There is not a moment in which I would wish that you had spared me… I don't think it's possible for us to spare each other, anymore."

Her heart is beating loud and fast in her chest; she wonders if he can feel it, if he can tell that she feels more nervous and vulnerable now than she does when she whispers to him that she loves him, before all the eyes of the world. Xan, held close, now pulls away to look her in the eyes.

"Estel'amin," Xan says, "I…"

He looks taken by disbelief and awe; he looks as if he wishes to kiss her. But then, another thought comes to him—and she can spy this exact moment, by the sudden look of resolve in his eyes.

"There is a question that has been on my mind for far too long," Xan says. "I have agonized over when to ask it, but I think it can only be now. I feel as you do. I would share everything with you: my memories, my emotions, my life… and I would know you, in turn, as dearly and intimately as I have only ever known myself."

He takes her hand; his fingers, and the rings upon them, are normally cool upon her skin, but tonight they exude pure warmth.

"I wish to forge the bond that will unite my world with yours," Xan says. "I wish to have you in my arms, Estel'amin… will you have me?"

The building elation that she'd felt throughout his first sentences falters, stuttering to a halt. Suddenly, their closeness comes to the forefront of her awareness. His touch, his gaze, and even the mundane way the fabric of their clothes has tangled together around their bodies; to notice these things now leaves a weight in her chest.

"Are you afraid?" Xan asks, softly.

She can't respond; he does not push her.

"I know," Xan says, and if Radri were less preoccupied by her thoughts, she would note that his tone betrays a hint of nervousness, "This commitment is far too great to fathom in a single moment. An elven bond is the closest intimacy I could have asked of you; I have had many days to reflect on it, and yet I have not granted you the same. I am not so fragile that I will turn away from you if you refuse me tonight."

Hearing that, her head jerks up, startling him slightly. Refuse him—in this? How could he imagine that she would, when even in the earliest of their days together—after she, by a miracle, had managed to convince him to stay—she had thought secretly, wistfully back to the kind of bond she had only ever been able to read about in books?

"No… No, I have been thinking on it, too," Radri says, and clutching the emotion in her heart, admits, "I am ready for our bond—but it is all I am ready for, right now."

"Then our bond is all I ask."

Shocked, she looks up at him.

"What do you mean?" Radri asks, "You… you're still willing, to...?"

"Radri," Xan says, a fond, relieved smile pulling at his lips, "Our bond is the one part of my question that I had always feared you would refuse. The rest can wait until the day you wish for it."

For a moment, she can do nothing but stare in disbelief. That feeling of elation returns, building little by little, replacing the heaviness in her chest.

"Can you ask me again?" Radri says, feeling somewhat breathless, "S—so… so that I might accept properly?"

"I have longed to forge the bond that will unite my world with yours," Xan begins again for her, and adds, with a look of unbearable tenderness, "I love you, Estel'amin. Will you have me?"

And at last she answers in a whispered, "Yes."

—

When Radri wakes, Xan is sitting up beside her, already awake himself. She stretches her arms out to hug him around the waist, and closes her eyes again.

"You've spent less time in reverie than I," she grumbles, "How is it that you're already awake?"

"Is it your wish that I return to bed, then?" Xan asks, brushing through her hair with an idle hand. "I will… But first, I noticed that you were running short of candles, so I brought you one."

Xan presents her with a lit candle. Radri, sitting up, beholds it with bewilderment.

"I… Thank you, but… if you're already burning it now, won't it go to waste?" Radri asks, looking at him. Still new to her heart, his presence and his feelings there are not yet easy to sort through, but she manages to single one out: anticipation.

"There is more to it, Estel'amin," he whispers, pressing a kiss to her cheek, "Just trust me."

Holding the candle between them, he faces her seriously.

"I wish to give you a promise, together with this candle," Xan says. "I… I feel you, now, as clearly as I feel myself. I know your fears as sharply as I know mine. And I promise: while you are here, with me, in reverie or in the waking world, you will not run out of candles, and whenever you have need of me, you will not find me wanting. —If you do have need of me, that is."

He extinguishes the candle, and looks at her with a slight smile.

"I almost do not believe it, but I feel… hopeful," Xan says. "And there, the candle is out. Do you forgive me for squandering it, now?"

"Yes," Radri says, barely managing to voice the word with how touched she is, and clearly past the need for any apology of his. "I'm… I…"

Xan just gazes contentedly at her, looking more at peace this morning than he has in days, and rather than trying to put into words what she feels after hearing what he said, she just wants to hold him. So she does.

"I suppose you will want us to return to reverie now," Xan says, his voice slightly muffled by the arms she's thrown around his neck. "I appreciate your offer to serve as my blanket, but it will be difficult to kiss you goodnight in this position… and I know how you cannot bear to forgo it."

"What even are you talking about," Radri groans, having reached her limit for deciphering spoken words the moment Xan's candle went out. There's simply too much information: from her heart, her head, this bond, and even the sun, whose rays are now peeking irritatingly in from the gap in the curtains at the window.

"Nothing," Xan answers, feeling all of this from her, and deciding to postpone his teasing for later. They have time. This hour, this day... and yes, perhaps even tomorrow.

—

full xan/radri compilation