#all the robins

[gothamite-rambler]

Superman talks to the members of the Justice League Batman is "closet" to and warns them about his best buddy not being in the best mood.

Superman: He won't say what he's mad at, but he's irate. Be nice to him.

Hal (Green Lantern): I'm so sick of this, we always are!

Green Arrow: Not with that tone.

Hal: My point stands, he's always brooding and emo, this time I won't be nice to him like I always am. Just civil in the sense of I'm not talking to him.

Hal walks off, Arrow shrugs in agreement with Hal and leaves as well.

Superman: That leaves us, Diana.

Wonder Woman: Great, we'll pester him until he gives us an idea of what's making him pissy and then he leaves not wanting to talk.

Wonder Woman crosses her arms waiting for Superman's response.

Superman (bashful): It could work this time.

---In the lunch room of JL headquarters---

Aquaman enters the lunch room seeing Batman resting his head on a table.

Aquaman: Hey, Bats, what's the matter?

Batman: Leave.

Aquaman: Not in the talking mood, no worries I'm just getting my lunch.

Aquaman grabs his lunch from the fridge and sits at the same table with Batman, but in a seat far away.

Aquaman: Want to have half of my tuna fish sandwich?

Batman grumbles.

Aquaman: It's for grabs if you want it. I'll be quiet, but I like eating my lunch here, I won't make a peep though.

Batman (muttering): Great.

---Three minutes later---

Aquaman: I swear it is tough keeping up appearances at times. Like to the public I'm Aquaman, defender of the sea, handsome, happily married, king of Atlantis, but like... You ever hate masking so much?

Aquaman pauses.

Aquaman: My bad I promised not to talk and then that slipped out. Sorry, Bats.

Batman sighs, keeping his head down.

Batman: Yes.

Aquaman: Oh you want the sandwich?

Batman: No- Maybe, but I mean I do hate putting on a facade at times.

Batman lifts his head and sighs again.

Batman: It feels as if I have not just two, but three lives to live. Batman, Businessman, Father, dealing with an irate Carrie at PTA meetings... I'm attending PTA meetings and I can't tell that Carrie I can launch a contingency plan on her because that's what Batman would do! Then there's the field trips that I have to send my older sons to chaperone on because I can't be around a bunch of other... Parents.

Aquaman (who has been eating his sandwich, nods): I get ya, being a parent is tough especially when you're Bruce Wayne and Batman. Oh and the word isn't Carrie, it's Karen. My sidekick taught me that.

Batman: God, I can't even get this stupid slang memorized.

Aquaman: You learn to and it gets easier. You've done well with your three sons, Damian and you are still growing. Here, eat the other half, it's good.

Aquaman slides over the other half of the sandwich. Batman reluctantly takes it and bites into it.

Batman: This is actually really good.

Aquaman: Thanks, Mera and I have been practicing recipes. Enjoy and I'm guessing here, but you'd rather sit in silence after venting to me?

Batman nods, chewing on the sandwich.

Aquaman (chuckling): Agreed.

With that the two enjoyed their silent lunch together with Aquaman offering him chips as well.

[batfam-stuff-posts-0]

Bruce, on the phone with Dick: Nightwing, the worst thing you can do in these situations is take matters into your own hands.

Dick, over the phone: Got it.

Dick, after hanging up: *turns to Red Hood, Red Robin, Spoiler and Robin* We're gonna have to take matters into our own hands.

[superbat-love]

Superman trying to defend Robin until Batman gave him The Look.

[what-if-this-happens-instead]

What if - The Robins called each other by their numbers?

So like -

Dick = One/First

Jason = Two/Second

Tim = Three/Third

And then Fourth and Fifth for Stephanie and Damian.

Who started it? Four, of course. It was definitely the Fourth. She needed to get Third’s attention, but they were undercover. It went something like this;

“Psttt. Three. THREE.”He looked over at her, pointing at himself,confused.

Four nodded. “Three. Get over here.” Still looking confused, he snuck over to her. “Four?” He asked, and she nodded. Thank goodness for big brain Robin #3. He caught on quick.

Then after they had finished that mission.. they just didn’t really stop? It was like a nickname. Then One started doing it as well. Five was not happy about his number, eventually caught on. Two also does it, but he switches tone or adds emphasis when he speaks. Just to be annoying.

(Second, Third and Fourth have all stared adding emphasis when they call out ‘Fifth’. It’s worth the knife throwing just to see him twitch.)

[just-an-enby-lemon]

I'm a sucker for generational trauma stories.

[i-currently-have-purple-have-sir]

So I found out recently that you can read comics online for free which is wonderful because I’m poor and have been wanting to read DC comics for ages. However, when I do things like this, I always feel the need to do it systematically, and there are so so many and no where is there a website that breaks down the categories and series and everything all in one place. That should be a thing right? Like a website that’s just like oh u want to read dc comics, here’s all the characters that have their own, here’s all of that character’s comic series in chronological order, here’s all of the comics in that series. Does anyone get me?

[shinydmoon]

I’ve started another side project tangent.

Up side is its only list making with minor Research

Down Side?

It likely involves 10+characters to give teams of 6 or More pokemon. Some of which i ether know very little/none to only Fanon/fan versions of.

[glitter-stained]

Random goon: Hey boss, were you the one to pick that name as an alias? And why this one?

Red Hood : I used to have another name, before... A long time ago. But that person is dead now. I get to choose for myself now, they can't take that from me. I won't let them.

Goon: Huh.

***

Random Goon: Say boss, why do you never take off your shirt in front of us?

Red Hood: Well uh, I actually have that really fucked scar on my chest and I'm not comfortable with...

Random Goon: Don't worry boss, we get it, you don't have to explain yourself to us.

***

Red Hood, high on some toxin: God, I wish my family...

Random Goon (on boss-sitting duty): why not try reaching out to them?

Red Hood: They would never accept me as I am now... They wouldn't agree with my so-called "life choices". Besides, they don't miss me, they miss the person they think I used to be... I wasn't even a man when I last saw them.

Random Goon: Damn boss, that sucks.

***

And then the goons throw the Red Hood a party on trans visibility day and Jason is so confused he straight up cries.

[p0isonives]

conner kent has INCREDIBLE self control, cause if i came back from being dead to find out Tim Drake tried to clone me 99 times because he missed me so much, i’d immediately make him my bride

[gothamite-rambler]

Inspired by this post

Robin!Dick: Hi Ivy!

Poison Ivy: Hi... young child. Stand over there, away from the giant rose.

Robin!Dick walks away from the rose while staring at it mesmerized.

Robin!Dick: Can I-

Batman: I will take you home.

Robin!Dick pouts and walks off grumbling.

Ivy: He's adorable, if I didn't hate people I'd keep him. Okay, so run it back, you want me to stop my mission to protect mother earth and you were like "that's wrong for me to do". Continue with being wrong.

Batman: I should not have to explain to you how you are handling your mission to save the earth doesn't benefit people.

Ivy: Why? Because some people might die? A few dead bodies are worth it for saving the planet.

Robin!Dick (shocked): What?! You're killing people?

Ivy: Yes... A few dead bodies are worth- Why is his face sad?

Robin!Dick: That's so mean.

Batman: Now you've upset him.

Ivy (indignant): All right last I checked, the earth is dying, what do you want me to say? I'm not destroying the Earth, big corporations pumping out micro plastics, pouring random crap in the lakes, Nestle... JUST NESTLE! They're screwing this planet like she's a two dollar hooker! I stopped eating their chocolate bars after the founder said water shouldn't be given to everybody!

Robin!Dick: Did he actually say that?

Ivy: Basically he implied water shouldn't have free access because Nestle is the biggest proprietor of bottled water and no amount of explaining will ever fix the fact he said that! So whatever you're about to say, Batman I do not want to hear it! They’re destroying ecosystems, hunting endangered species, killing crops and-

Robin!Dick: Hold up, that's all she's trying to fix?

Robin!Dick turns to Batman.

Batman: She's not doing it in logical way.

Robin!Dick: She's a green woman who can control plants! Does she look like she wants to use our logic? No offense by the way Ivy.

Ivy: You're fine, I love my body.

Robin!Dick: Why don't we help her, Batman? Has she asked for your help?

Batman: Um... It's been brought up in the past.

Robin!Dick: Then why haven't you?

Batman: Because... She's a criminal and will let people die for the cause.

Robin!Dick: Well I mean if it's that nestle guy I don't... Don't necessarily blame her and I've seen you beat the ever loving shit out a lot of bad guys.

Batman: Language.

Robin!Dick: The context needed the word. I love you Batman, I do, but let's be real if we did even half of what she did we'd be going to prison too. You'd be, I'd be tossed into an orphanage and that... That's not fun.

Ivy: A lot of kids in the system have been abused, he's got a point.

Batman: Why are you arguing with me?

Robin!Dick: Because dang it, she might have a point! We can help her to a degree... In fact isn't the building we're in is being sued for what they did to a lake? All those ducks died.

Ivy: Nothing can grow there for decades.

Robin!Dick: Yeah, the ecosystem is destroyed there.

Batman: Why are you ganging up on me?

Robin and Ivy: Because you know it's wrong!

Robin!Dick: You have told me you became Batman because the system is flawed and sometimes matters need to be taken into your own hands? How is she different?

Batman groans then yanks Robin by the ear.

Batman: Excuse me, I have to talk to him in private!

Ivy: Aww, I'm starting to like the kid, go easy on him. He's smart.

Robin!Dick (being dragged out): Thank you, Ivy.

Ten minutes after the two argue Batman comes to a compromise with his son and Ivy because he knows that Dick would absolutely not mind sabotaging factories or causing a fire with a supervillain. All he needs is a good reason.

Batman (driving them home in the batmobile): Could you not defend the actions of the bad guy in front of me next time?

Robin!Dick (eating McDonald's fries): Don't take me to one who has a point.

...

Batman searches for Robin after taking down Joker.

Batman: Robin? Where did he go?

Joker (laying on the ground as Batman presses his shoe on his back): One of my goons went after him.

Meanwhile Robin does flips, tricks and runs around the room while giggling as the goon chases after him.

Goon: Little boy, little boy stop running!

Robin runs and runs but when the goon tries to grab him, Robin grabs his hand and clamps down with his mouth. The goon screams.

Batman: He's down the hall.

Joker: There's no... Guarantee he'll win.

Robin kicks the goon in the crotch and runs off.

Goon: Right in the kiwis.

Robin!Dick: Batman, I got the last one!

Batman: Good job, Robin.

Joker: I hate your child soldier.

Batman: Thank you, I raised him well.

...

Talia Al Ghul (to Batman): You-

Robin!Dick: You're out of his league.

Talia: What?

Robin!Dick: I'm just saying, it's obvious you have this stalker obsession with him, 'love' you like to call it, but Batman could do way better than you.

Batman chuckles covering his mouth.

Talia: Okay I was telling him to stop his 'no-kill' rule and join the league, but also he wants me and some snot nosed brat won't have a say in any possible relationship!

Robin!Dick: Well, I'm 12 now and even I can see you shouldn't be together. Not even on a league level, but like come on, why get with a guy who doesn't want you or to be on your team? That's sad.

Talia: You think I won't smack a teenager? I don't give a fuck!

Batman (disturbingly calm): Touch him and you'll wake up in the hospital.

[batfam-stuff-posts-0]

Robin: I know you want to keep me safe, but the only way to do that is to wrap me in bubble wrap and hide me in the cave, and I still could probably escape-

Bruce, sighing: Believe me, I know. I've thought about it.

[punnifullife]

Based off this post. funny doodles i took too seriously.

[redsray]

the funniest part of any Robin meeting the JL is that every Robin is so distinctly different from the previous one in terms of personality and vibes that the league literally gets backlash. and like, I don't blame them. not to mention that they are non-meta children that dress as a traffic light and fight crime alongside batman in gotham on a nightly basis. i'd also be a bit concerned. Batman, literally The Night of Gotham personified in the League's eyes, coming into a JL meeting: This is Robin, my crime-fighting partner. 11-year-old Dick Grayson, dressed in the brightest primary colours possible, vaguely hidden murder behind those eyes, never stops moving even for a moment: Hi! Superman: That's a child. That's-- Bats that is a child. You let a child--? Batman, deadpan: You try to stop him. Would you rather he try and murder a grown man with a wire?

Batman: This is Robin. 12-year-old Jason Todd, with the biggest grin on his face, about 3 books in his hand, stars in his eyes and a distinct street-kid drawl: Hey!!! Green Lantern: That's ... that's a different child. What?? Jason: I stole his tires :) Batman: Tried to. Jason, stage whispering to the League: basically did. Green Lantern: that is a different kid, right?? I'm not seeing shit??

Batman: This is Robin. 14-year-old Tim Drake, bo staff clutched in his hand, a wary and tired expression on his face, more on the quiet side, the literal walking definition of don't judge a book by it's cover: hello Flash: Where do you even find these-- Tim: I found myself.

Batman: This is Robin. 17-year-old Stephanie Brown, literally blonde, with a shit-eating grin, eyes full of nothing but mischief and the most explosive personality you've ever seen: hiya!! Superman: I give up. Stephanie: I know, I have that amazing effect on people.

Batman: This is Robin. 13-year-old Damian Wayne, a literal wet cat that will hiss at you, has a sword, the most judgemental stare you'll get from a teenager, ready to jump anyone there: Green Lantern: WHY DOES HE HAVE A SWORD?! Batman: ... he came with the sword.

[seren-dipitous-art]

I’ve been obsessed with the Olympics for the past week, and obsessed with Dick Grayson for longer, so here’s the crossover we all deserve.

Plus, gorgeous sweaty acrobat in gymnastics poses? Only positives.