#and also emotionally complex and complicated

[elevenenthusiast]

Honestly, I’ve only just started unpacking how deeply Stranger Things leans into heteronormativity across the board. I used to think that was mostly a Mileven vs. Byler problem, but now I’m realizing it’s way more widespread. Like, outside of Lumax and Jopper every other “straight” couple either feels performative, underwritten, or just kind of hollow.

Lumax and Jopper are the only ones that feel genuinely earned. There’s a weight and emotional truth to their relationships. With Lucas and Max, their love doesn’t feel like it’s being shoved in our faces it just exists in this really organic way. You can feel the history, the tension, the care. They argue, they misunderstand each other, but there’s always this deep pull between them. It’s complicated and real, and it’s never treated like a prize or a fairytale. Same with Jopper they’ve been through hell, and their connection feels lived-in, flawed, but strong. They’re two people who’ve grown into their bond, not been forced into it.

Your point about Robin and Vickie? Absolutely nailed it. That final scene was supposed to feel like this big moment, but it barely registers. There’s no foundation for it. Meanwhile, Steve is still orbiting them, and it just reminds us that Robin’s queerness while acknowledged isn’t being explored. The potential with Ronance is right there, but instead we get this safe, shallow setup with Vickie that feels more like a checkbox than a real arc.

And honestly, that ties into something I’ve been thinking about a lot lately Jancy. I’ve never been a hardcore shipper I always preferred them over Stancy but I kind of glossed over them. And now I’m realizing how strange it is that no one is talking about how off they were this season. Their relationship felt emotionally distant, disconnected like they were just holding on because the plot told them to. And yet the fandom is weirdly silent about it?

It’s wild how Mileven gets constant breakdowns about how it’s falling apart people write essays about them but Jancy’s decline is just… ignored. No big arguments, no thinkpieces, no “is this the end?” speculation. It’s like because they’re a “default” straight couple, people assume they’re fine unless they’re literally breaking up onscreen. Meanwhile, queer ships like Ronance have to scream for crumbs, and even when there’s clear emotional intimacy, it’s dismissed or sidelined.

I also really love the way you’ve been dissecting Stonathan and both Steve and Jonathan’s characters. I know Steve is extremely queer-coded so naturally fans eat that up and while I’ve never personally been into ships like Harringrove or Steddie, I do find Steddie kind of fun sometimes. Harringrove, though, just never sat right with me I can’t get into it at all because I genuinely hate Billy, but that’s beside the point. What you’ve been doing with Stonathan has been so refreshing. It’s one of those ships that gets brushed off as just fanon, much like Ronance or even Elmax which I also think had real potential, even though I love Lumax. But it’s kind of telling that Byler is the only queer ship in this fandom that gets taken seriously largely because it’s the only one the show even slightly treats as plausible. And that just shows how strong the heteronormativity still is, even in a series with queer characters.

And while we’re on Steve I’ve always felt like there was way more to him than just the comedic relief role the show kept slotting him into. It honestly frustrated me for a long time. Like, yes, he’s charming and funny and has great moments with the kids, but it often came at the expense of exploring his actual depth. I loved seeing glimpses of his dynamic with Nancy and Jonathan, and especially with Robin, because those moments gave us a taste of who he really is beneath the surface. There’s complexity there a guy who’s deeply insecure, still figuring himself out, struggling with purpose and loneliness and the show just never gives that enough room.

Instead, we got seasons of him being Dustin’s babysitter, which yeah, was cute at first, but it ended up boxing him in. That whole arc kind of overshadowed other chances to dig into his character emotionally, especially in connection to the older teens where he actually fits narratively and thematically. His story could’ve intersected way more meaningfully with Nancy and Jonathan’s if they let it, and Robin could’ve added even more depth to that group dynamic. Instead, they leaned into the comic relief aspect, and I feel like that’s done him a disservice.

And that’s the core of it this weird double standard where straight relationships are assumed to be endgame unless proven otherwise, no matter how weak the writing gets. But if a queer relationship wants to be taken seriously, it has to be undeniable, explicit, and perfectly built from the ground up. And even then, people will still question it.

That’s why Ronance hits so hard for me. There’s this rawness and unspoken closeness between them that feels so much more real than what Robin has with Vickie or what Nancy still supposedly has with Jonathan. And it’s frustrating that the show refuses to really go there. It keeps skimming the surface instead of leaning into what actually has emotional depth.

So yeah, thank you for saying all this because you put into words what I’ve been slowly realizing. The way the show favors shallow hetero pairings while sidestepping more genuine, complex connections (especially queer ones) is a huge blind spot, and I’m glad more people are finally starting to call it out.

Vickie is straight

... and she has a crush on Steve

I know how controversial it is to state such an opinion given how Vickie seems to be one of the few characters in the show who actually seem queer. Yet if we are being honest she has never expressed any direct or indirect signs of actually being in love with Robin. It's Robin who is incredibly biased as she has a crush on Vickie and Steve who is trying to be supportive of Robin who gave us this assumption.

This whole thing is not as bad as it seems though. I can promise you this. So if you still care let me explain to you why I think Vickie is straight and has a crush on Steve.

Part 1: The Muppet joke

While still in the car with Steve in early S4 Robin gets reminded of her own advise: Just be true to yourself and stop pretending to be someone you're not. We need to keep this in mind as she is soon shown to not follow said advise.

When Steve reminds Robin at the basketball game that Tammy Thompson does sound like a Muppet she agrees with him. Vickie overhears this and in turn agrees with Robin.

The joke however doesn't originate from Robin. She just repeated what Steve told her before. Therefore the joke that made Vickie laugh comes from Steve. Or in other words: It was Steve who made Vickie laugh and not Robin.

We even get conformation of this a bit later in episode 2 when Steve admits and agrees out loud that it was his joke that made Vickie laugh.

Robin wasn't entirely herself.

While everyone is looking straight ahead it's Vickie who makes a point not to look in Robins direction after Robin is embarrassed of herself. There is distance between them.

Part 2: Vickie and Robin (and Steve) meet at the Weapon Store

It's Robin who notices Vickie first in the weapon store which is followed by Steve looking at her as he knows she has a crush on Vickie which is then followed by both of them looking sad as Vickies boyfriend enters the scene.

Robin is obviously sad because her crush has a boyfriend while Steve is just sad for his friend.

This shot is often brought up to proof that Robin is standing between Vickie and Dan as it's believed that her crush on Vickie is reciprocated but I don't think this is what it means exactly. It's Robins POV and she believes her feelings to Vickie are reciprocated so she sees herself as standing in between them.

But is it true? Let's look at what Vickie sees next.

Vickie notices the both of them and while Robin is just staring at her Steve is licking his lips. Then Robin turns around and leaves while Steve is still looking at Vickie and Dan and then smiles awkwardly at them.

So Steve is licking his lips and then smiles at Vickie and Dan. What message would Vickie receive here? My guess would be 1) Steve and Robin are close and 2) Steve might like Vickie as well.

This however is the last look we get of Steve in this scene. It's his back while he is still looking after Robin. So whatever made him lick his lips and smile is no longer of interest to him the moment Robin leaves. I think this means that he is Robins friend first and foremost. He is not romantically interested in Vickie and doesn't reciprocate her feelings at all.

Robin is gone and Steve has turned his back on Vickie but her gaze still lingers. Maybe her feelings towards her own boyfriend aren't as sincere as it seems and everything considered I think it's fair to ask who this is truly about? Robin or Steve? Is she saying the truth when she makes it about Robin who she did meet in band or is she using Robin as a shield as she doesn't want to admit to her boyfriend that she has a crush on another man aka Steve?

In the end she looks back towards her boyfriend and then again to the place where Robin and Steve just were. Is he perhaps still standing there?

Then we get a scene transition to Nancy holding a very long gun. It's not subtle at all.

Part 3: Providing Food for the Suffering

There is light behind Robin which can indicate that she is the one who is most sincere in this scene. This makes sense as it is true that Robin has a crush on Vickie.

It's Vickie who gives her the information that Dan is no longer her boyfriend but from the scene in the weapon store she also knows that Robin and Steve are close. So everything she says to Robin is likely to reach Steve as well which means that Robin could be the one to tell Steve that Vickie is single again and therefore available to him.

First notice how Vickie wears spiral earrings. This is very interesting to me as it's triangle imagery that is used to indicate queerness in the show. So here we have the supposed love interest of one of the only confirmed queer characters in the show not wearing triangle imagery when it really matters. Why? Because she is straight.

Vickie also mentions how she rambles about her boyfriend when there are people out there suffering at which point in time she looks up and slightly to her right. Later when the scene transitions from Robin and Vickie to Steve we also get him at a alight angle which to me indicates that Vickie was looking at him as she was lifting her head.

It's Steve who Vickie perceives as the one suffering and who she wants to provide with food. Or to put it a bit differently: It's Steve she has a crush on and who she wants to be with and support.

Steve on the other hand is also smiling and looking at Robin and Vickie. He is happy for the both of them as everything seems to be working out for Robin and Vickie which could not be further from the truth. He's also shaking his head just slightly. Most likely because he thinks a certain assumption he's made just an episode earlier turned out to be wrong.

That assumption about Vickie pausing Fast Times at 53:05 however might be true after all. Steve is just misreading the signs Robin and Vickie are giving off at the gym.

Tbc in a reblog because I almost hit image limit. Look here.

[emberphoenixisgoingtolive]

something interesting i've noticed about Sammy and Kenji...

they're the two people with canon confirmed parental issues, and they're the two people who are the least willing to let Brooklynn back into their lives.

rant under the cut because i have a Lot to say on the matter.

also trigger warnings for abuse, dysfunctional/toxic families, and kind of sad lore of my own

let's first unpack their parental issues. Kenji has no mother, as far as we know. he doesn't talk about her, and we only see a drawing he did of who we can presume is her when he was five. so either she's dead, or divorced Kenji's father (and if she did i don't blame her honestly). either way she's not in Kenji's life and isn't willing to take him in after daniel's arrest if she is, so she's either a dead mother or a shit one.

and i have a whole post about Kenji's dad in season 5 alone but there's other hints across seasons 1-4 that make us realise daniel is a horrible father (like how he has no pictures of his son in his penthouse and only shots to make him look good, he changed the locks to the penthouse just because Kenji failed algebra (which on an island filled with dinosaurs could've been downright dangerous) and probably more that i can't recall off the top of my head). plus, there's that line in season 2 where Kenji is talking about Esther Stone and says that the "relationship between Ester and her dad is really compelling." and he phrases it to imply their relationship is complicated in some way. so clearly Kenji understands the complexities of a father/child relationship and is emotionally affected by them.

so here's what we have. Kenji's dad visibly makes Kenji unhappy to be around, he's barely in his life, emotionally or physically (neglecting Kenji for probably almost all of his life), he is fiercely manipulative, and he generally sees Kenji as a tool of business, rather than a separate human. even when Kenji is grieving from his girlfriend's apparent death in chaos theory, daniel has the audacity to use this as the opportunity to blackmail Kenji into becoming the ceo of his company in exchange for information. as Kenji says himself, everything is a business transaction to him. he clearly has no care for Kenji's feelings, autonomy, or his general existence as a separate person to him. and to top it all off, the cunt has to go and die right in front of his son.

so from all of this, Kenji's biggest emotional triggers would be the following: being neglected and having his feelings disregarded by someone he loves.

and what does Brooklynn (unintentionally) do? neglect his feelings, spend little time with him, and disregard his feelings. PLEASE don't take this as Brooklynn hate, i love her and i could make a whole separate post about how the direction the camp fam's lives took is all a result of trauma from nublar and mantah corp island, but to put it briefly, Brooklynn's trauma manifests itself as being absorbed in the source of her trauma (dinosaurs but also conspiracies and shady people) to the extent of obsession. but either way, she hurt Kenji in a way she wouldn't have been able to do if Kenji didn't have all that trauma from his father.

and to make matters worse, when Brooklynn died, what does Kenji do? completely shut himself off, stop talking to his own brother (and that is a heartbreak in itself), and only calls the one (1) stable and loving adult in his life once a week. at least he has her, but still. it's highly likely he had a rough time with abandonment issues while he was living with her.

now onto Sammy! up until the dinosaurs got to the mainland, she has a healthy relationship with her family: she loves them and talks about them in a positive light, she has happy memories of being with her family (like when she and her sister competed to see who could collect the most deer antlers), and, most importantly, she risks her whole life to save their ranch. it's clear her family means a lot to her. her dad is thrilled to see her when she and the others get back to the mainland, and he embraces her. he also hugs her when she and Yaz tell their parents they're dating (interesting detail i noticed is that Yaz's mum hugged them both, but Sammy's dad only hugged Sammy, which i take to mean foreshadowing... i'll get to this in a bit) but Sammy's family support their relationship and like Yaz enough to even let her stay on the ranch with Sammy. so up until the dinosaurs get to the mainland, it's all good!

so how did Sammy go from that, to her family cutting her off and not speaking to her? how does Sammy go from two loving and stable parents, to almost crying when she sees Aminata being gentle and kind to her daughter Zayna?

well, here's where i bring my headcanon in.

here is the original post where i basically say that Sammy's family were kind of paranoid of the others after getting Sammy back from the mainland, since they were so shaken by almost losing their daughter to mantah corp, and people like Kenji (who has connections to his dad) or Brooklynn (who somehow manages to get involved in an evil man's mess) they are kind of wary of. however, i think they warmed up to them more, but were always cautious. BUT, when the dinosaurs get to the mainland, and Brooklynn starts investigating and stuff, Darius gets involved with the dpw, Ben gets into conspiracies, etc etc, they start to become more and more sceptical of the camp fam, and they want Sammy to keep her distance so she and her family can stay safe. the fighting continues, until they give Sammy an ultimatum. the camp fam, or the people that raised her. she chooses the camp fam. Brooklynn is killed a few days later.

so in a way, Brooklynn (unintentionally) drove apart all of Sammy's relationships. she is (indirectly and unintentionally) the reason Sammy's estranged from her family, and part of why Yaz and Sammy broke up.

not only that, but Sammy has to deal with the dinosaurs coming back (let's not forget she was traumatised them too) and her family leaving her and Yaz having severe ptsd symptoms. and this is NOT to imply Sammy stayed with Yaz out of obligation or didn't want to care for Yaz during the worst of her ptsd - as a disabled person, relationships can and SHOULD be balanced with both people caring for each other, and a nondisabled person caring for a disabled person in a relationship is just as valid as two nondisabled people.

however, the act of caring for someone during such an emotionally difficult time with no support system is traumatic. i've been there, it's happened to me. LORE TIME!!!! my parents separated for a few years when i was eight, and then my mum got sick with gallstones. so it was just me, my younger sibling, and my mum in a house where my mum was badly sick and very emotionally unstable because of the separation and her fat free diet she had to have, and i had to look after a lot of things. i had no stable friendships, i was distant from my dad, i couldn't rely on my mum, and i had NO support system at that time. i couldn't rely on anyone or ask for help from anyone stable i could trust. and that's messed me up to this day. of course this is very different because Sammy is presumably an adult by the time this happens and i was a child. but the feeling of caring for someone and feeling isolated from everyone else is mutual :')

i imagine Sammy would experience a similar kind of feeling when she is living with Yaz and the dinosaurs come back to the mainland. juggling the weight of being estranged from her family, the dinosaurs coming back to the mainland, Yaz's ptsd getting worse, and dealing with her own issues on top of everything... it's not surprising she wasn't doing well. there's an analogy that says you should put your own oxygen mask on before you can put on another person's. that's because you need to save yourself before you can be responsible for saving other people. (in a way, that was exactly what Yaz was trying to do: look after herself so she was less burdened by her ptsd and she felt like less of a burden.)

so Sammy's biggest emotional triggers would be feeling like no one prioritises her feelings or cares about her actual feelings.

and what did Brooklynn do? not prioritise Sammy's feelings, of even acknowledge them. she went back to the camp fam without even saying sorry for faking her death and causing all that heartbreak, literally only talking to the campers for information. (again, NOT Brooklynn hate. i understand why she did all that. but the heartbreak from Sammy's pov is the same regardless of logic.)

and both of them choosing not to go after Brooklynn actually is better for their characters, especially Sammy. Sammy is such a loving and selfless perso, but she never once got to prioritise herself... until she did. until she decided not to go after Brooklynn. this is the writers' clear way of saying that she's growing, she's changing, and if the others want her back, they will need to fight for her, because Sammy is over one-way relationships.

overall, Sammy and Kenji have been hurt by their parental issues in ways the others of the camp fam haven't, and that's a core driving cause as to why they are less willing to forgive Brooklynn.

EDITING TO ADD SOMETHING I FORGOT: yes, i know Darius technically has parental issues because he lost his dad, but that is a completely different pain and feeling. his dad is dead, but he was never abusive, or toxic, or mean, or cruel, or neglectful to him. Darius was never in a position where he had no one he could rely on (he always had his mum and Brand) and he's always had that stability. Sammy and Kenji don't

[attackofthecats]

Current status: overwhelmed with love and appreciation for Padme Amidala.

[keferon]

Just want to say, love your mimick au. I only found it like, an hour ago and I've devoured everything in the tag and I'm planning to do the same to the spellbound and monster hunter aus.

That said, in one of the mimick fanfics, Orion tells Prowl to leave him alone and to find a hobby, but a comic that (presumably) happens after this conversation when Orion meets Jazz, Orion seems to be back to working with Prowl. I thought the whole "leave me alone" order would go on infinitely because Orion didn't seem to have his goal locked down and he also never specified when to come back. So how did they return to working together? Did Orion find Prowl post-meltdown, or was it Prowl who just set an arbitrary amount of time before going back to Orion and going "so, how do you feel about defying god?" I just find Orion and Prowl's relationship so interesting in this au, simply because of how Orion doesn't seem to apply his morals about freedom and coexistence to Prowl despite the fact he's the one who points out that Prowl didn't include himself in his calculations, but at the same time, if he doesn't recognize Prowl's autonomy and only sees him as a tool (chatGPT style), he would have to accept that he's the one responsible for Prowl's actions because he's the one using him. But also also, Prowl encourages him to not take responsibility for all the immoral actions (like killing monsters to keep the Council's favor), which I think Orion does take up, but that would indirectly be accepting Prowl as a individual capable of making his own decisions, you know? It also the fact that Orion and Prowl both have different (and somewhat incompatible) ways of communicating. I was thinking when Orion asked Prowl to what he'd do to make the most amount of mechs happy, Prowl understood it literally: the majority of the population are non-monsters, so statistically, he'd focus on making non-monsters happy. But Orion doesn't want to make most mechs happy; he wants a diverse and equitable society, and that doesn't necessarily lead to happiness, especially in transition phases. Even in the academy, monsters are learning to compromise to live in a non-monster society; compromises are about restriction, which often aren't a source of happiness. But Orion equates that vision to happiness, and probably gets a bad impression of Prowl given "free reign" from his answer. It's great, it's so juicy.

And contrasts so well with how Prowl and Jazz interact and communicate with each other. Like how Prowl makes an attempt to learn hand language for Jazz in the same way he attempts to comfort Orion post-Shockwave demonification. But unlike Orion who has "Prowl is not alive" at the core of their dynamic, Jazz doesn't know and sees Prowl's attempt to learn as a genuine attempt to understand/communicate. You can argue that Prowl is just "programmed" to try and get more information and it's just efficient to ensure Jazz doesn't get carpal tunnel while working together, but you can also argue that we're all programmed to do that as well; small talk or bids for attention are behaviors/actions to build connection through information exchange that we are trained to do from formative years and general society. Which is to say, even if Prowl learns and tries to accommodate Jazz for mission purposes, it doesn't negate the fact that he is investing effort into communicating and building the foundation for a meaningful connection in the same way other people do. It's great, I'm having a blast with the whole AU.

Orion despite being afraid to continue his mission still has responsibilities in his Order so him and Prowl. Yeah hahah they just keep working together but purely on their usual legal tasks. I didn’t talk about the whole situation enough yet but basically Prowl never informed Orion about his new quest of suing God. Primarily because he knows that Orion definitely will try to stop him.

It’s kind of like. “What isn’t forbidden can automatically be considered allowed” mentality.

Also MY GOD YES. My favourite part of this au is reading asks like yours:0 Prowl exists in that thin line between being and not being a person capable of his own choices. Orion exists on the thin line between considering him being one of those options. He can’t see Prowl as a “real mech” because he knows for a fact it’s not true. But then seeing him as a tool means accepting that all questionable things he does are Orion’s responsibility.

At the end of the day Prowl is a metaphorical piece of fabric Orion uses to clean his consciousness. In his eyes Prowl isn’t alive enough to be fully blamed for all the bad things he does but he is also alive just enough for Orion to say “it was your fault. Not mine.”

Jazz doesn’t have that dilemma. Uh. Yet haha he will discover the truth eventually of course~. He thinks Prowl is obviously a real mech because in his world magic isn’t alive. It can create an illusion of a mech, sure, this is what all usual golems are, but it’s not smart or believable enough. It’s like one of those tests where all people think they can tell if they’re talking to an AI chat bot because “duh I would obviously know” and then fail to distinguish AI from a real person. Jazz is perceptive but he doesn’t know what to look for. All he knows is that Prowl is somehow doesn’t love anyone but seems to care about of things that aren’t people.

Also it’s a bit unrelated but I find it soooo interesting playing with the usual concepts of magic and technology. Because usually magic is perceived as something more “coming from your heart” and “connected with emotions” while technology tends to be more “soulless” and “emotionless”. And then we have the entire world of robots who think they are alive and magic isn’t :)

[meowchela]

🌙- what is your f/o doing late at night when they can’t sleep?

delilah is a CERTIFIED SLEEPYHEAD so she doesn't have this problem. due to her powers, she falls and stays asleep very easily....however, actually getting rest is another story, because using her dream powers takes up a lot of energy. this makes her nap during the day in order to get that energy back properly!!! so she'd probably meet up with me the next morning and we'd both me tired, me from not sleeping because i'm more of an insomniac between the two of us and her from sleeping but not getting any rest XD

as for sarv? she has a lot more skeletons in her closet that would keep her up. certain regrets and irreversible choices, past actions that haunt her, even things she's been forgiven for that she just can't let go of. being alive for centuries will do that to you, and being former leader of the underworld doubly so......especially since she's tried so hard to distance herself from that life. usually she sleeps pretty well but i can definitely see there being times where it all catches up with her again and she has to take a night to just ponder everything. most of the time she'll have ruv by her side to be a silent comfort/to talk things out with him since he was either there for it or has seen her at a point where he'd understand but on nights where i stay over i'm sure she'd just want to cuddle me close like a teddy bear and try to ignore it all. like with ruv she can let her feelings out more freely because he's seen her at her worst and understands where she's coming from, but she sees me as a fresh start and wouldn't want me to see the uglier sides of herself that she's been distancing herself from for centuries now. of course i would love her no matter what, but to her it's an oppurtunity she doesn't want to mess up, yknow? so if we spend the night together we'd probably stay up doing fun or relaxing things to get both of our minds off of the late night demons we both have to face

from this prompt list!

[mangled-by-disuse]

Tried to put this in the replies, but it got long and is relevant to the OP, so:

Less so than the average British/South African white guy of his time, which is to say: yes, but not notably so.

He did also speak very bluntly in his response to the Nazi requests to translate his work, claiming he would have been proud to be a genuine Aryan [that is, from the Indian subcontinent] but unfortunately he's just German and English. Some of that is "Oxford fellow thinks he's being very smart" rhetorical devices, but he also does seem to have been pretty vocally of the belief that different cultures and ethnicities held value, and while he left South Africa very young and considered himself English, he did also remark on the brutality and inhumanity of the apartheid regime there. He also criticised C.S. Lewis' assertion (in The Last Battle) that some people couldn't get into heaven on the basis of race and culture, but "have a theological argument with C.S. Lewis" does seem to have been one of his primary hobbies at the time so idk if that was purely anti-racist.

At the same time: this was at a time when the N-word was in common parlance (including in children's nursery rhymes and even in leftist discourse), when Britain had an empire and Tolkien had been raised in one of its colonies, and when the school system emphasised "the white man's burden" and the savagery and primitivism of "lesser" cultures. And Tolkien was not a radical, and not sufficiently concerned with race as a topic to break fully from that social conditioning. So it's not like he wasn't a racist, but he wasn't a racist by the standards of his time, background, and immediate environment. (Bearing in mind that his immediate environment was the same one that saw the rise of Oswald Mosley and Winston Churchill.)

What Tolkien WAS was a genuine, old-school British conservative, which I think is what right-wingers pick up on in his work. He had an engrained belief in hierarchy and traditionalism, and his arguments against capitalism come from Catholic semi-feudalism, not socialism. "The rich man in his castle, the poor man at his gate/God made them high and lowly and each to his estate" is very much an underpinning of a lot of Tolkien's work, which emphasises the importance of working to, and being satisfied with, your status in life - Sam's strength is his humility and desire to be a simple gardener, but, while humility remains valuable throughout, Aragorn's strength is that he knows that he is born to be King. Ruling is all he can ever ethically do (noticeably, whether or not his people consent to be ruled - note that the first Man of Gondor he comes into contact with is Boromir, whose response of "ok mate where the fuck have you been when we were fighting and dying for the past forty years?", and that is cast as a mistake on Boromir's part, and he is told to sit down and respect the rightful king by Literal Voice Of The Gods Gandalf), and it would be wrong and evil for him to try to do anything else, just as it would be a moral wrong for Sam to try to be a king.

Lord of the Rings in particular is very concerned with noblesse oblige and the burdens of power - while, yes, the core story is "minor gentry [Sam is the only actual working-class character] rises above his presumed station and, through being literally and metaphorically one of the little people of the world, slips under the radar and completes a heroic quest", almost all the surrounding stories are about the difficult duty of managing power. And, unfortunately, this lends itself very readily to a "white man's burden" kind of reading - these people, you see, are simply of superior race (literally, in the case of the Elves, and in the case of Aragorn, Boromir, and the ruling class of Gondor being measured by their proximity to Númenorean bloodlines), and so it is their unfortunate duty to command and to cleanse the lesser (Orcish, and by extension Easterling and Haradrim) races from their nice, functional societies.

To be clear: I do not think this is how Tolkien intended it. I think, in his own traditionalist, cloistered-academic, Catholic way, he was pretty egalitarian. He doesn't treat the ruling class as actually better than the working class - Sam is no less a hero than Frodo, Merry, and Pippin, all of whom are gentry or nobility, and none of them are lesser as people than Aragorn or Elrond or even Gandalf or Galadriel - even if he does view class distinctions as fundamental and immutable differences. He values friendship, peace, and the laying down of grudges (against all the problems caused by revenge, note that Éomer's first and most noble act of kingship is "accepting the Dunlendings' surrender, treating them kindly, and making peace with them", and they are so impressed by this that they too put aside a centuries-long war and help rebuild the country they helped to destroy). While he often forgets that women exist (I will die on the hill that "three out of 22 rulers of Númenor were women, despite equal inheritance being explicit" is evidence that Tolkien just did not think of women as being half the population), he is quick to defend their value in both masculine and feminine pursuits, and to express them as people outside of marriage and childbearing - and his own life, in which he married a much older divorcée from a different religious background against all voices from their families, reflects that same sense of valuing women on human terms. He is a humanist, not in the religious sense but in the sense that he values humanity above all things in his writing; he writes consistently against power for its own sake, against war as glory, and against bigotry and condemnation.

BUT

he was also a traditional, dyed-in-the-wool Tory, Catholic-restorationist, pro-feudal Oxford don who was raised in a much more conservative time, place, and social class than most of us, and he brings that to his writing too. From a conservative perspective, reading with an eye for right-wing ideas:

Éowyn ultimately turns from the aberration of being a warrior and becomes a wife and mother, embracing "feminine" traits of healing and caring as part of her own healing.

Class is reified through Sam's heroism being that of a servant, and Aragorn's that of a king, and the return of the king is the source of great rejoicing.

Some races, and some classes, are simply better at things. Dwarves are better craftsmen. Men are better warriors. Elves are better at everything because they're special. they are also tall and fair and European

The idyllic Shire is a cottagecore dream of traditional British rural life, in which people know their place, women are real women, and everyone has good manners.

Most of the "good" societies are coded with European or Classical trappings (the exception is actually Gondor, which is pretty easily read as Byzantine), and opposed against a literal rampaging horde from the East. Some of the horde from the East are literally inhuman, while others are elephant-riding brutes who hold oblique historical grudges and strange religious customs. Compassion against these foreign invaders is looked upon favourably by the narrative, but only after you've killed them.

With the previous point, and the films, in mind, it is easy to conclude that regardless of species diversity, the Fellowship is a cadre of brave white men fighting to protect their society from a monstrous foreign threat - one in which a cunning trickster from within the main setting has puppeted the less evolved races into destroying Western civilisation.

While the story is anti-war, it is anti-war in a way that allows for cool battle scenes and noble deaths, and there are several points at which Dying For A Cause is lionised and seen as redemptive in a way that slots nicely into a lot of more militaristic ideologies (including fascism).

again, I cannot underline enough, I DO NOT BELIEVE THIS IS A FAIR READING OF THE NARRATIVE. I think it's an ideologically-motivated reading that ignores both Tolkien's personal views and large chunks of the text. But the thing is: the people who read it in the way I've described would probably say the same thing of your description.

The thing about Tolkien's much-discussed distaste for intentional allegory is: Lord of the Rings is not 1984. It is not an explicit political polemic. It is one man unpacking his Great War trauma and political anxieties, his expertise in Anglo-Saxon literature, his special interests in folklore and etymology, his love of the English countryside and his dislike of modernity, his Catholicism and his conservatism and his egalitarianism and his loneliness and his loves. It is not absolute in its politics, because it isn't trying to give you a political solution: it's trying to give you morals, yes, but they're as much personal ones as societal ones.

It is not a shock that right-wingers latch onto Tolkien's work, or see parts of their beliefs reflected there. It's still a fucking insult to the work, but it's not a shock.

Seeing conservatives and bigots being fans of Tolkien works is a special type of jumpscare bcs what are you doing here man? In the franchise about folks from different backgrounds and races come together in brotherhood to vanquish the villain? Where kindness and compassion and sinple happiness were seen as the best ways to keep evil at bay? Where war is not glorified and seen as a grim necessity to the point where the son of the author gor criticised the movies for glorifying the war too much? Where men openly engaged in feminine activities and were open about emotions other than anger? Where multiple characters gender presentation varied from those we normally associate with their gender? Where women were empowered in multiple different ways? Where greed was presented as turning one into a literal monster?Where the villains are all thinly veiled depictions of capitalism? Where care for the enviornment is seen as a given?

[anniedreamwilldo]

I fear that anyone who says stuff like “ugh atyd is awful because Remus is so ooc and Sirius is a misogynist and wolfstar are so toxic in it” not only a) has terrible fandom etiquette but b) MISSED THE WHOLE POINT

Atyd is not a story about Remus Lupin

Atyd is not a story about Wolfstar

Atyd is not a story about the First Wizarding War

Atyd is a story about class and privilege. Atyd is a story about queerness and comphet. Atyd is a story about disability. Atyd is a story about the intersectionality of class, privilege, queerness and disability. Atyd is a story about growing up and learning how to be a person. Atyd is a story about morality, sometimes being a ‘bad person’ and what this even means. Atyd is about war and grief and societal circumstances forcing your hand. Atyd is a story about emotionally driven decisions and how they affect the people we love. On that note, Atyd is a story about love, but in all its beautifully complex and messy shades, not fairytale romance.

All The Young Dudes is one of the most layered and nuanced works of fiction to ever exist and 99.9999% of criticisms I see of it can be boiled down to “tell me you lack media literacy without telling me you lack media literacy”

Also again, for the love of Remus Lupin, please please PLEASE stop publicly slating fanfictions. Everyone has personal taste and you won’t enjoy everything you read, but fics aren’t published works that have invited critique. They’ve been provided to you for FREE by a fellow nerd in the community so keep any negative thoughts you have on fics to your self.

I’m not saying everyone has to enjoy Atyd or that people can’t think that Remus is OOC etc. BUT the fic is not bad because it’s not to your personal taste and like I said, the overwhelming justifications I see for why people think it’s bad seem to entirely miss the point/ the fact that some of these choices are absolutely intentional from the author. Like, of course Sirius makes objectifying comments about Mary… he’s a teenage boy in the 1970s who is massively overcompensating to cover his queerness. A huge part of his character arc is comphet???

“We want complicated characters!” people scream until they see a seventeen year old kid on the precipice of fighting in a war for a society that has shunned him for his disability be moody and mean to his boyfriend

Anyway enough of me rambling. Long story short, I’m an ATYD defender until I die

Muchos love n wolfstar xo

[twilightofthesandwiches]

So one of the cool and interesting ways ‘Steven Universe’ used to try and balance being both a series of 11-minutes episodes that each have their own satisfying emotional resolution and being an overarching story with complicated character arcs that take multiple seasons to resolve is the… I’m going to call it the ‘Not Quite Right Lesson’ episodes. Episodes where a character kinda learns a Very Important Lesson… but a more careful and retrospective look at the situation shows that what they learned is not Quite the Right Thing for them. They internalized something in that adventure which just ended up causing more Emotional Troubles for themselves farther down the line.

‘The Test’ is the most classic example. 

As a standalone thing, it’s just a sweet episode about Steven learning to accept that his caretakers are also flawed and confused and figuring this shit up as they’re going along just like he is, and then doing a nice thing for their sake.

But looking back at this episode, it is quite obviously the nadir of Steven appointing himself as the Family Therapist and repressing all of his problems so he could better help the Gems’ with theirs. Like, there have been some early warning signs for this Complex, but this episode is the one that really cemented that idea in his mind and probably the reason it took him like the Entire Rest of the Show Including a Post-Finale Season to really untangle it.

But… also, I’ve been thinking a lot about the episode right after that, ‘Future Vision’. I think it’s also a very important ‘Not Quite Right Lesson Episode’ for the character of Garnet, and to some extent, the Crystal Gems as a whole. In many ways, it is to the CGs' character arcs' what 'the Test' is to Steven's.

So in this episode, Garnet reveals to Steven the fact that she has Future Vision. She hoped that telling Steven a little bit more about herself and being honest with him will lead to a greater understanding and a greater bond between them… but it backfired. It just led Steven to become a total paranoid, terrified wreck stuck in a total existential crisis.

And it seems like the lesson Garnet learned is that… she should’ve never taken that risk at all. That it would’ve been better for everyone if she just kept Steven ignorant of the truth forever.

Extremely reinforced with the ending of the episode, where Garnet chooses to once again hide an uncomfortable truth (that he just came very close to dying again) from Steven, for the sake of his own ‘peace of mind’.

So, like, the Gems were already hiding uncomfortable truths from Steven since day one. “If you could only know what we really are” and all of that. But I think… With the actual truth of Homeworld encroaching on them more and more at this point of the story arc, this would’ve been a great time for the Gems to reconsider their attitude and actually Explain to Steven What the Hell is Going On. 

But instead, I think Garnet saw the events of ‘Future Vision’ as a reinforcement of the idea that there’s just some things Steven is Better Off Not Knowing. Actually being frank with him about Homeworld and the Diamonds and the War right there and then, that would have just overwhelmed Steven with fears and worries and would’ve ended up doing nothing but hurting him. And Garnet can’t accept that possibility, not again.

And so, Garnet, alongside Amethyst and Pearl, keep all these truths from Steven as long as possible. Only revealing bits of information when they have to. For Amethyst it’s about her emotionally-evasive attitude (also, she legit doesn’t know all of that stuff herself). For Pearl it’s about how she learned to romanticize Rose’s own fucked-up obsession with secrets. For Garnet, with her usually very direct attitude and preference for the most straightforward solutions, I think it’s very much the events of ‘Future Vision’ that were still playing in her head every time she had the choice to actually Explain something to Steven and decided not to. 

But that, indeed, was Not Quite the Right Lesson. While being bluntly and directly told by Garnet all about the Many Ways He Could Die caused Steven to go into an anxiety spiral and an existential crisis for an episode - the way the Gems have been consistently secretive and evasive with Steven ended up causing him so much more emotional grief to him in the long run. As all of these secrets ended up revealed to him in the most surprising, dramatic and traumatizing way possible.

And the secretive attitudes ended up driving a wedge between Steven and the Gems. 

Even after they promised to be more honest with him. Because the sight of Steven crying on the roof that day is one that Garnet can easily move away from. Because Garnet’s Not Quite Right Lesson was almost as difficult for her to unlearn as Steven’s own. 

But after the big confrontation at the start of the Zoo Arc, Garnet ended up being the most upfront about the Crystal Gems’ history. Almost overeager to share what she knows about the past.

I mean also, again, Amethyst just has less to tell and Pearl is hiding secrets for reasons beyond her control - but I think it’s also important to consider from the perspective of Garnet’s arc.

Because the fallout of the Pink Diamond Reveal is very much centered around Garnet (or, well, Ruby and Sapphire). That was the Truth that was hidden from her 'for her own good'. And at the end of the day, despite all the grief that unveiling that truth has caused

It has also brought them, all of them, a lot closer.

There's a reason why 'the Truth' is Garnet's Final Missing Piece in the movie. It is as central to her character arc in the series as Lesbian AngstTM grief over lost love is to Pearl.

And still, some remnants of the Trauma of 'Future Vision' remained...

After all, even the very last episode of 'Future' was centered around the Gems once again trying to hide things from Steven (at that case, their turmoil about him leaving) for his own sake

Even though it once again just caused Steven a whole lot of grief.

It's maybe notable that at the end of this episode, Garnet, once again, tells Steven what's waiting for him in his Future...

[dykeofmisfortune]

when talking to straight people i think house and wilson are gay and i ship them fanon style. but to fellow gay people however i think its more complicated than that and i do think canon is extremely interesting and i like sticking to the text and analyzing how house and wilson are the show's central relationship and what they have is way more complex than just romance. there's layers to this codependency and i think it's definitely homoerotic at some points but so much of it is just pure nonsexual platonic devotion. they're literally each other's only friends. and specifically with wilson, he doesn't have any connections besides house and his romantic/sexual pairings with women (that's why he's a serial monogamist with 3 ex-wives and also a serial cheater; he literally doesn't know how to have platonic close connections with women, and doesn't seem to hang out with many other men) and i think equating house and wilson to that same kind of romance/sexual relationship would somewhat water down their bond bc i do think if wilson was romantically/sexually linked with house they would Not last as long as they did together. wilson is drawn to instability. every time a relationship got too stable he cheated. this is why he's so attracted to house. if their game ever ended and they settled into a coherent "romantic" or "platonic" dynamic it would be boring, so they need to exist in a hazy in-between area to work. and the same goes for house; i don't think he functions well in a romantic relationship period, if nothing else than because of the social rules. he struggles with things like "being emotionally available" and "honesty" (two things that are kind of expected hallmarks of a romantic relationships, and also the two reasons he and cuddy broke up). the lack of a social contract house and wilson have with each other is why their relationship works for them and also why i don't think they could ever get over their repression and be in a legit romantic/sexual relationship. but when i'm watching it with my parents i'm gonna be like "yeah they're sooooooo gay"

[rosesnbooks]

❤️Scorpio placements🖤

💋sun in scorpio: scorpio suns are complex and those with this placement vary a lot. i have no trouble figuring out someone's moon in scorpio but it gets a bit difficult when it comes to the sun. either way, they always have a strong presence and they don't go unnoticed. people tend to form strong opinions about them, whether good or bad. their aesthetics can be different, with some even leaning toward softer looks. the women can be really cheerful and soft, but persevering. the men tend to be more on the "man of few words" side while trying to upkeep a masculine demeanor. they tend to have a great memory and they form strong attachements with their loved ones. they can be either shy or outgoing, but one thing they have in common is that they remain a mystery to a certain degree. they are full of life and they are very curious, and intellectual. they are funny and they love humorous people too. they are interested in many things and they like direct people who are fun to be with. the toxic ones can be really mean and gossipy, while others can be attentive and interesting. they appreciate the beauty in small things in life but they also have high ambitions and aren't afraid to dream big. they are responsible and mature for their age (obviously not everyone but yeah). they are hidden romantics and they have a crush most of the time

💋moon in scorpio: sensitive people with lots of emotions they try to keep hidden. they are very careful who they open up to and people tend to drain their energy, or they simply get tired of keeping up appearances. they want to have people in their lives who make them feel safe and they want someone they can confide into. they try to be independent but they want to rely on others sometimes too. they crave to be understood but they also want to remain a mysterious persona. they also crave a lot of passion in their daily lives and romance. they need hobbies and people that make them feel alive. those who do not manage to find such things tend to become obsessive with love and..yk...because it can give them that high. nevertheless, they are very passionate and creative. they are intuitive and feel other people's emotions but their emotional intelligence depends on their personal growth and their ability to be open-minded. they are prepared to do whatever it takes for their loved ones. i have noticed that they can be hard on themselves and that they wish to be more detached because it seems less complicated. despite craving privacy, i think many of them like attention, especially from the right people. they are yearners at their core.

💋ascendant/rising sign in scorpio: these people seem intimidating at first. they could have a soft aesthetic and everything and still not be easily approachable because of their aura. and yet, people can't seem to stop gravitating toward them. they usually leave an impression even in the shortest of interactions and people want to know what's happening in their mind. they are a lot more sensitive than they look. when relaxed and confident, their demeanor can be hypnotizing and they can turn on their charm easily. i have noticed that they find a fashion style they like and stick to it religiously. many prefer darker colors or more neutral tones they can combine with similar shades. the textures can vary but I rarely see them in any flashing colors. their eyes have a specific depth to them and you feel like they're always out of your reach somehow. they are a bit shy with new people but once they relax they can be humorous and talkative. others may think that they flirt a lot more than they actually do, which can get annoying. i've noticed that they attract emotionally immature people and men who show signs of toxic masculinity. they really like music and their alone time. food is also important to them!

💋mercury in scorpio-these people may not be of too many words unless they feel comfortable with you and even then, they are not yappers (in my experience). they observe people to form strong impressions. they are not the biggest fans of confrontation because they know things could get out of hand, so if they decide to fight with you, you must have pressed all the wrong buttons; especially if you hurt someone they love. they are honest and they like to get straight to the point. they talk with passion regarding the things they like. many of them really like gossip and their tendency to form strong first impressions can be impulsive and incorrect at times, so they need to be a bit more open-minded and patient with people. they are true skeptics sometimes because they need to believe in something 100% before acknowledging it. they also like taboo/darker topics. they are interested in the human nature and value truth even when it is uncomfortable and painful. they know how to read between the lines and figure out the true meaning of someone's words, so they are not easily fooled. they are not interested in small talk, in fact it drains them. i think journaling is amazing for all signs, but scorpios could benefit from it especially. basically, any outlet that lets them express their emotions and creativity without shame or fear, is good for them. it can be hard to compromise with them sometimes, and they need to work on that.

💋venus in scorpio-they want partners they can trust wholeheartedly. they may get entangled in some affairs because of their passionate nature and a deep desire for love. when they find the right person for them, they are dedicated, loyal and borderline obsessed haha. their partner becomes a part of them. i've seen some people write that scorpios can cheat their partners if they meet someone who provides the passion that is otherwise lacking in their relationship. i think anyone can cheat, so i don't have the need to comment on that. they probably had some karmic relationships in their life that taught them, the hard way, the kind of partner that's actually good for them. they are not afraid of seeing their loved one's dark sides. in fact, that just brings them even closer because they feel like they got to know them properly and they feel less ashamed of their own darker characteristics. these people are really sensual and they make their partners feel desired and wanted. truly not for those with weaker hearts. once again, they can be stubborn so they need a patient partner with a strong character. they need someone who will be a safe haven for them; someone intuitive, kind, honest, responsible, and well-tempered. they want a healthy relationship, the kind that feels like true love. people who value their freedom and alone time a lottt are not the best match for them, as well as those who lack empathy and healthy communication. in regards to their style i think it is more varied than people may think. people always say that they are romantic but i think this depends on the rest of their chart althoough in general, they are.

💋mars in scorpio-these people are very intense. they can be stubborn and they dislike obeying authority. if they think they're right about things, they can find it difficult to consider other perspectives. they put their heart into everything they do and they dislike doing anything half-heartedly. once they lose interest in something, it is hard to get right back to it, which is why they tend to excel in things that interest them, while performing more on the average side on things that don't matter to them/make sense. they are strong-willed and no matter the obstacles and the dark periods in their life, they persevere and learn from every experience. i've written once that they tend to be either hypersexual or on the asexual spectrum, haven't noticed anything in between much (and i still stand by it). when they get angry they feel consumed by it, and the feeling can stay with them for a while. that can be really tiring. they want to resolve things immediately but they feel blinded by their emotions so they usually have to wait to cool off and think about things before giving a healthy response. they can say hurtful things and hold grudges for a long time. i feel like they are fully aware of all the darker aspects of their personality. they can be overly protective and possessive. but, their love is deep and strong, so people feel lucky to have them in their lives. people can depend on them and trust them with anything. they like taboo topics/darker topics and they are interested in spirituality; they even find comfort in it.

💋saturn in scorpio-i don't know anyone with this placement but i've heard a couple of things along the years. it is no secret that these people are afraid of intimacy and exploring their emotions. they are afraid of being too much and saying the wrong thing, which gets in the way of their personal and even professional life. they can be stubborn, secretive, and quick to judge. they are scared of relying on others so they deal with things alone. life has not treated them kindly and they underwent many transformations. they are strong individuals who can overcome any obstacles and they are very careful and observant. they don't rush into things and they are quite smart. their emotions and intuition provide a rich inner life and a big and loving heart that just needs to give people a chance more. they understand others because of everything they've been through and they can be someone's rock in difficult times. people naturally respect them and listen what they have to say attentively. i've read that they are often responsible with their finances and other reponsibilities. once they decide to work on themselves, a bright future awaits because they will realise their strength and invite wonderful people into their lives.

💋jupiter in scorpio-these people do anything their heart desires even when scared. they are careful, smart, passionate, and loving. they have most luck when they welcome change in their lives. that's when they grow as people and find many good things and people on the way. they use their intense emotions as a tool that guides them toward the truth, which is why they often make the right decisions and trust the right kind of people. they are magnetic and attractive. their wilpower is amazing and they have a great intuition. a lot of them are interested in spirituality and astrology. tarot may be something they are interested too. they have the ability to use their strengths for a good cause or for their selfish gains. this depends on them entirely. life can test them more than others which might seem unfair, which can lead someone toward a path of distrust and manipulation, or courage and honesty (and love, obviously). despite it all, some of them can be victims of manipulation (through media or the ones closest to them). people may learn what makes them tick and what they love and adapt accordingly, only to fulfil their malicious plans for them. i know someone with this placement who uses their intensity to get what they want and it can be morally troubling at times (e.g. using fear and power). they need to nourish their confidence and relationships with others in order to keep growing. nevertheless, they are interesting people you can't seem to forget

♡Thank you for reading dear! A little disclaimer: I am not a professional!♡

©rosesnbooks

[kinardsevan]

i've kinda kept my mouth shut (outside of the group chat, that is) on Buck's attitude and behavior in 809 on purpose. as a neurodivergent who has certain opinions in the face of Buck and Eddie's relationship that others have already pointed out (Buck's unending loyalty and willing to give while Eddie continues to take without thanks), there's something to be said about having abandonment issues and complex trauma that is being compounded all at once without any reprieve. so i'm gonna spell some shit out.

let's start right at 801, when we literally started the season with Buck running to the roof of the firehouse and his coworkers friends telling him not to jump, but also compounding that statement not with "because we care about you" but instead "because we'd have to clean you off the sidewalk". there's been discussion in the fandom before about Evan's passive suicidality and all that plays into that, but it's an important launching point for where we're at now, as far as I'm concerned.

then you get into the meat of the season. it's never exactly easy for him: first there's Gerrard and the complications of that relationship, then there's the issues of the boils/his health, then the breakup. then we waltz right into Eddie announcing he's leaving town to go be with his son, and suddenly we're arriving at a point in time that, in terms of "time" on the show, is probably only about a yearish out from him surviving being struck by lightning. that's also a major trauma to deal with, that we didn't really ever see fully resolved, and now we're about to add the kidnapping of his sister (and the possibility, however remote, that she miscarries due to her kidnapping? this has just been suggested in the group chat, but anything is possible).

i've seen the commentary that he needs to get over himself, that he was selfish for what he did to Eddie, that he needs therapy, etc. but here's the thing:

you can do decades of therapy and still be emotionally dysregulated in times of heightened stress. let's also add that in the midst of everything that was changing in Evan's life over the past year(ish), his one constant that he could rely on, was the relationship he was in. it was a relationship that--as many have pointed out--was the first time he was put first, was treated as though his feelings mattered, and he (as I assume we'll see come to pass canonically) likely felt seen. Tommy didn't pander to him, but he also didn't shut Evan's feelings down. I imagine in the face of dealing with Gerrard, his disloated shoulder (and the boils), Bobby's NDE and subsequent shift from being in charge the 118, Tommy was a stabilizing force for him. he got to go home and have someone who cared to hear about his ails.

so here we are months later, when all of his friends are back on even ground from the shit they all were going through previously (which he showed up for each and every one of them with, by the way), and he's sinking. he's struggling against the current of loss, after loss, after loss. and i'm sure somewhere in there (as someone who hsa gone to therapy), that for a while, he told himself to just go parallel to the current, and eventually he'd make it out. but I think we're also seeing at this point that he's caught up in a riptide. we know he's not doing okay losing Tommy ("I don't feel anywhere near recovered"/"I almost relapsed, I almost called Tommy"/"don't go leaving your people, you don't know how hard it is for them without you"), and now his best friend (who he's bent over backwards for many times in the last seven years, even in the face of being told he's exhausting and selfish) is leaving town. something that's baffling to me in the midst of Eddie's choice to leave too, is this: it's supposed to be a noble choice. he's supposed to be after this big pursuit to fix things with Chris and be a part of his life, and all that comes with that. I can understand not mentioning anything until he'd secured a place to live, however, once he had....why wasn't there a talk with Bobby, at the very least? why keep the secret of "i'm still figuring out how to leave here". wouldn't by the very nature of the fact that you're planning to leave and not return, you want to make that transition as smooth as possible??? wouldn't it make more sense to clue your friends in that you need a subletter, that your job will be vacant soon and your team is going to need someone to step in and fill that slot? it's not like these people are going to call down to El Paso and tell your family that you're on your way. and ALL of this is long before we get into the discussion of how he tells potential subletters that he has no ties to LA and that the real opportunities are in Texas. sure, we can continue to make the argument that Eddie didn't know Evan could hear what he was saying, and that he likely was only thinking of the future move at the time....

but also, as someone who can relate to the RSD, to the complex trauma and abandonment issues...it's NOT about that. Evan's reaction to Eddie's statement makes total sense to me because time and time again, I have voiced a need that sometimes, in the depths of feeling like I'm drowning in the deep waters, all I've ever wanted (and all I can assume Evan wants), is a little fucking recognition. he's not asking for Eddie to stay, and he states as much. he's not even asking for his people to put him first. all he's asking for is for his pain to be seen and recognized. to feel as though the people he loves, who bends over backwards to keep happy and from leaving, recognize when he's in pain. and yet.

it's why i have such a strong belief about where this story is going in terms of his mental health. you can only continue to lose, lose, lose so much, and sink under the weight of all of that before something breaks. and we can have arguments about how he needs more therapy, or how he needs to grow up, or this and that... but at the end of the day, you can do all of those things and still end up in the position he is. I made the argumentt to the group chat the other night that even under the contention that I'm likely more emotionally mature than Buck is, I'd still (and in fact have) reacted in similar ways to how he did. it's very easy to sit back and point fingers until you're faced with the same situation and all you're looking for is a little support, and everyone keeps shutting you down.

it's why my bucketlist hopes for the rest of the season see him going to the lengths of choosing selfishness if when he and Tommy get back together. it's that same vein that has me wanting to see a parallel to Maddie's s4 ending for him with his mental health, except I want Tommy telling him that they'll figure it out together. I want him finally getting to have someone in his corner when all the chips are down. obviously time will only tell if we get that, but we'll see.

[nightmare-foundation]

Honestly, it always really, really confuses me when people say that Bruce isn't abusive, he "just has a complicated/complex dynamic with xyz", before proceeding to list things that are very much abuse.

Like, it makes... no sense to me? I feel like people hear "Bruce is abusive" and immediately jump to the conclusion that we're saying "Bruce is maliciously/intentionally hurting his kids and he can't he changed". When that's not what anyone is saying- at least not me.

And i feel like trying to insist Bruce isn't abusive while waving around these very abusive moments is. Dangerous? Like it's fine if you don't like or disagree with the concept of Bruce being abusive, more power to you and all that, but I feel like it's very blatant abuse apologia to push these things as not abusive.

People have a very weird view on abuse imo. Abuse isn't as clear cut or black and white as a lot of people make it out to be. Abusers can very much love their kids, they can accidentally harm their kids, and abusers can change.

Imo, what makes Bruce's relationship with his kids/Robins so complex IS his abusive tendencies. We know the reasons behind his actions, as well as his motivations, but at the end of the day, he's still abusive. He still emotionally neglected/abused and parentified Dick (and still hit and beat the shit out of him in Nightwing v3 #30, no matter how much nuance you put into it), he also emotionally neglected Jason, verbally abused Stephanie (iirc, i haven't read her Robin run), parentified and emotionally neglected Tim, and verbally abused and emotionally neglected Damian. None of this was done with the intention to hurt them, but Bruce still hurt them. But Bruce loves them DEEPLY- that's part of why he ends up hurting them.

That's... what makes his relationship with them so complex, especially Dick.

And honestly I'm not even sure how to go into how people label clear abuse as not abusive, purely because we know how Bruce thinks and why he does what he does. As I said, really dangerous thing to perpetuate.

This post is probably very scattered and doesn't make a whole lot of sense since I couldn't sleep at all last night, but TL;DR: you can disagree with abusive Bruce, but labeling his canon abusive tendencies as not abuse and only as a 'complex relationship' isn't the win you think it is and only comes off as abuse apologia.

[averycutesalamander]

pls write yan!boothill OMG WHO SAID THAT

ohoho....!! i must confess that im quite picky when it comes to yandere content, bc i don't particularly like the extreme end of the spectrum. physical violence and straight noncon in particular don't click for me (absolutely no shade to people who like that tho, you do you!!) buuuuuuut ..... i mean, im the one writing?? so i can do whatever i want??? so alright here you go :) also check my reblog for.. a lot of rambling lmao

may i present to you: my interpretation of boothill in love, but he has a few too many screws loose. warning for relatively vague descriptions of violence and, uh... yandere stuff. you know how it goes.

In all honesty, Boothill is not a "love at first sight" type. His attraction to you is a gradual, budding thing, built over many repeated encounters. He's emotionally isolated himself, after all - built a wall thick enough to muffle the whispers of his past, smothering it in a slurry of rage and sorrow. It'll take time for him to let down his guard for long enough to even register the feelings you conjure in him - a flutter in his chest every time you smile at him, a spark of joy every time he makes you laugh, a strike of fondness every time he looks at your pretty face when you aren't paying attention.

And beneath it all, a low, simmering greed, a hunger, a yearning; the urge to bite and devour and never let go.

The pressure builds with time, as the two of you grow closer. He visits often, though not so often that it would catch the IPC's attention. You laugh and joke and tease, playfully flirting with him yet keeping a healthy, platonic distance. (He very pointedly and stubbornly ignores the way his heart soars when you look at him like that - like you want to pull him into your bed and let him take you apart, piece by ruinous piece. It's just harmless fun, after all.)

(Right?)

Despite the yawning fractures in the wall he's created, despite the increasing complexity of his feelings for about you, he still hasn't untangled whatever complicated web of feelings that's arisen around you, content to leave himself oblivious for the time being - until you make a joke about him marrying you and sweeping you away on some bizarre galactic adventure, and he damn-near bluescreens.

(He hates, hates, hates that the first thing he feels is something adjacent to the feeling a cat gets when it finally corners a particularly unruly mouse, akin to the thrill he gets whenever an enemy exposes a weakness. A sick, twisted kind of satisfaction.)

His mind churns as the wall cracks, wavers-

...and crumbles.

He panics. He makes a flimsy excuse about getting a notification through his neurochip, about needing to help out a fellow ranger - and he feels even better worse when you believe him unhesitatingly, sending him off with a sweet little "Be safe!" just as you always do.

It's only after he leaves the planet that he thinks about how much you've grown to trust him, about how damn gullible you are, about how often you give him the benefit of the doubt, about how kindly you've always treated him in spite of (or perhaps because of) his dozens of strange quirks. Everything unravels, threads spilling from his fraying mind and spilling between his fingers, and when the tattered fabric settles-

He simply can't deny it. He's in love with you.

It takes some time for him to piece himself back together - weeks of complete silence from him, your texts going unanswered. Every time he sees a fresh notification from you, his heart twists with guilt - but he's not ready to face the music. Not yet.

He comes crawling back to you, sooner or later. He knocks on your door with the most sheepish, guilt-ridden look on his face that you've ever seen, a rich bouquet laden with yellow roses and purple hyacinths tucked timidly in his arms. He lies about why he left - says it was all because of a mission that got more complicated than it should have, and it wasn't safe to reply to your messages - but when he tells you that he's sorry, he means it genuinely.

He's a bit disturbed by the sensation in his gut - that foul, wicked satisfaction when you accept his apology with barely a slap on the wrist, cheerily inviting him inside to catch up. You tuck the flowers neatly into a vase, chatting easily with him as you carefully arrange them.

"It's alright!" you say, waving dismissively at him when he murmurs another apology. "I know you're busy. I can't be your biggest priority, obviously. You've got more important things going on."

(You don't have a clue how wrong you are.)

He integrates back into your life like he never left. When he has the time, he sneaks his way back onto your planet, knocking on your door or searching for you in your usual spots. You get impossibly closer; your playful flirting goes from blatantly humorous to something foggier, something more ambiguous, teasing the line between platonic and something heavier. He matches you step by step, returning your advances with just a little extra spice, his eyes a bit darker and his smile a bit wider.

He tries to be patient - god, does he try - but there's an itch that's bloomed beneath his metal, impossible to scratch, impossible to sate, made worse by every little joke you make about kissing him or touching him or marrying him or letting him spirit you away. The pressure builds further and further, the tension winding tighter and tighter, the anticipation bubbling higher and higher.

(He will never, ever admit that he truly contemplates stealing you away, crowding you onto a ship and carting you off so he can always keep an eye on you, can always guarantee your safety. His paranoia has been building since he recognized his feelings for you; it's taken every ounce of restraint in his body to stop himself from giving into the urge, from crowding you, from suffocating you, from locking you away like a fragile songbird in a cage.)

(He's torn between his protectiveness and his understanding that you deserve freedom. You deserve independence and a life that isn't tied directly to him. He doesn't even know if you return his feelings. But...)

(But there's that nagging feeling in the back of his head, that pestering little voice that grows louder by the day. You'll be safer with me, it says, dark and tempting, bursting behind his teeth. I can make you happy. I can keep you safe. I can show you pieces of the universe that you've never seen before. I can love you like no one else ever could. I can hold you and cherish you and consume you and-)

(He takes that little voice and wraps his hands tight around its throat, frantically trying to suffocate the noise, terrified by its allure. But it's always there, lingering, lurking - because the call is coming from inside the house.)

Something gives, eventually.

When he inevitably breaks, his lips crashing heatedly and messily into yours, there are two paths ahead - but the difference is ultimately moot, because they collide not long after.

Perhaps you reciprocate. Perhaps you melt against his lips, your arms coiling around his shoulders and drawing him further into you. Perhaps you whimper when his hands trail downward, squeezing at your hips. Perhaps you pull away with a gasp, your pupils blown wide, your heart pounding when you see the look in his eye - dark and hot and desperate and hungry. Perhaps you accept his quiet declaration of affection with open arms, returning it in full, your eyes sparkling with joy.

Or perhaps you reject him. Perhaps you freeze like a startled deer before pushing him away, your face slack with shock. Perhaps you apologize, stumbling over your words, your heart thundering in your chest when you see the look in his eye - dark and cold and empty and hungry. Perhaps you gently tell him that you don't feel that way about him - that you only see him as a friend.

Ultimately, it doesn't matter.

...Because Boothill - careful, meticulous Boothill - has slipped up, and the IPC finds you.

After he leaves next, whether that be with a broken heart or a giddy one, a trio of IPC employees pluck you up from the street in broad daylight, shoving you into a dark transport ship for "questioning." And once they bring you to an IPC space station, they do indeed question you - though it feels more like an interrogation, considering that you've been tied ankle-and-wrist to a chair like you're a dangerous serial killer and not a regular civilian.

"Suspected colluding with the criminal known as Boothill," your "interviewer" tells you flatly, idly thumbing at the knife in their hand. "Camera footage, reports from neighbors, records from his Synesthesia Beacon... All clearly show that he has made repeated visits to your planet and your home. We're in the business of knowing why."

Perhaps you keep your mouth shut and refuse to divulge anything, no matter how close that knife gets to your bare skin. Perhaps you break when it begins to slice into your flesh, drawing blood from your body and tears from your eyes and stuttered words from your lips. Perhaps you grit your teeth and bear it, unwilling to betray the man you've grown so fond of.

Or perhaps you cave immediately. Perhaps you sell him down the river the first chance you get, frantic explanations spilling from your lips. Perhaps you tell them that you had no idea he had such a massive bounty on his head. Perhaps you panic when they find the information insufficient and draw the knife on you anyway, deaf to your begging and pleading as they wet your skin with blood.

Ultimately, it doesn't matter.

...Because a distant explosion rocks the entire space station, and the flashing lights from the silent alarms interrupt your interrogation.

You're left alone when the IPC agent flees, locking the door behind them with a heavy clunk. Minutes pass as you fumble desperately with your restraints, your body pulsing with pain; a cacophony of gunshots and screaming penetrates the thick walls, growing louder and louder, your heart pounding faster and faster.

There's a noise just outside the door - a horrifically wet noise, like raw flesh on tile. You freeze like a rabbit that's just heard the panting of a starving wolf, far too close for comfort.

Silence. Your head aches from the flashing red lights.

Suddenly, steel fingers wedge into the gap between the locked door and the wall, single-handedly tearing it open and breaking the hydraulic lock with inhuman ease. Metal crunches and squeals, piercing the quiet - and there he stands, right in the doorway, a silhouette of black and red.

Never in your life have you seen him this manic.

His white hair drips with scarlet and his teeth are bared; his eyes are alight with rage, a shock of bright crimson among the dark smears of blood and viscera that coat him head to toe. In the light of the alarms, he looks like the perfect picture of a killer from a horror movie; violence and slaughter, just waiting to be unleashed. When his gaze locks onto you, there is a long moment of utter stillness; instinctual terror floods your entire body in a cold flash, because there isn't so much as a glimmer of humanity in those eyes - only pure, boiling, ravenous, frantic anger.

For a heartbeat, you're convinced he's going to rip you apart with his teeth.

Then, as if he finally registers who you are, the madness evaporates, replaced by a nearly manic sort of relief. He rushes to your side, looking you over; you don't miss the flash in his eyes - seething, smoking fire - when he spots your injuries. In the same breath, he snuffs it out, focusing instead on breaking your binds with his bare hands.

You're already crying when he takes you up into his arms, cradling you close to his chest and unwittingly smearing IPC blood onto you. "It's alright, sweetheart," he murmurs, soft and reassuring, a beacon of comfort in a sea of terror. "I'm right here. I've got ya. No one's ever gonna take ya from me again, okay?"

(Maybe if you weren't in shock, you'd be startled by his words. As it stands, though, they're like music to your ears, like a warm blanket settled over your shoulders, like a tight hug from someone you trust with your life.)

He encourages you to press your face into his shoulder - mercifully free of blood - as he carries you through the carnage he's left in his wake, the jangle of his spurs and your muffled sobs echoing through the silent halls. Your entire body shivers at the noise of him stepping into some unidentifiable slurry of viscera, and he thumbs at your back in an effort to soothe you, speaking quietly into your ear about everything and nothing.

Time passes in a blur of tears. He takes you to the ship he, uh... commandeered to get here, ducking into the bathroom and settling you gently - so very gently - onto the floor. Or, rather, he tries to - because your fingers are frozen stiff in his jacket, your grip unrelenting.

"You just wait here for a sec, alright?" he whispers softly, the chill of his hand settling lightly against your wrist; the blood there still feels warm to your delirious mind. "Gotta get the autopilot started, okay? I'll be right back."

You're both surprised when you shake your head insistently, your eyes wet and pleading. In an instant, he softens, his heart aching in his chest.

"Alright, sweetpea," he breathes, carefully picking you up again. "I've got ya."

He keeps you cradled to his chest as he walks to the cockpit, holding you easily with one arm as he gets the ship moving. Reinforcements are on the way, no doubt - but you'll both be long gone by the time they get here.

(Maybe the IPC will get the message when they find the scene he's left behind - when they view the camera footage and see the rampage he went on. Decapitation and disembowelment is a new one, even for him...)

(...but he needed to make it clear that no one, no one, touches what's his and gets away with it.)

When the engine is purring beneath his feet and the rumble of FTL travel is humming in the walls, he brings you back to the washroom and settles you to the tile again, gently untangling your grip from his jacket. You're in shock, he's sure, so he's careful to continue talking to you as he wets a towel with warm water, murmuring soft reassurances as he wipes the blood from your skin, handling you like you're glass.

Once you're clean, he messily towels himself off to get the worst of the mess off, then brings you to the captain's quarters, digging around in the closet to find something comfortable for you. Your shaking fingers cause you trouble, so he gently eases your ruined clothes off, his eyes respectfully averted as he helps you redress. He takes one look at the messy, used bedding and promptly decides to change the sheets. (Something within him stirs and snarls at the thought of you smelling like anyone else.)

Finally, when all is said and done, he eases you beneath the covers, brushing away the last remnants of your tears. His heart is torn between singing with joy and aching with pain when you reach up and take his hand in yours, your fingers wrapping tight around his.

"Gotta go wash up, honey," he murmurs, watching you closely as you sink into the protective huddle of the blankets, exhaustion painting your features. "That alright? I'll be fast."

(He tries very hard to ignore the flutter in his chest from the look in your eye - like you're genuinely considering whether or not you need to stay near him, like you aren't sure if you can bear the distance.)

(He also tries very hard to ignore the little pang of disappointment when you slowly nod, releasing his hand.)

He cleans himself up with record efficiency, resigning himself to wearing clothes that are a size or two too small until he can wash his usual outfit. The clothes are for your sake, really; it's not like he has any, uh... equipment to expose - not yet - but he's relatively sure that it would make you uncomfortable anyway.

By the time he steps lightly into the room again, you're asleep.

For a long, long moment, he's struck stupid by the sight of you, by the softness of your face in rest.

Fuck, you're beautiful. He knows it in his heart, feels it in his core, senses it in his chest - you're the prettiest little thing he's ever seen.

(And you're all his, now.)

His fists clench, and he swallows down the thought like bitter poison. (You deserve better than this - better than him. He's a broken man, he knows - a messy reconfiguration of a thousand corpses, glued together by hatred and grief. He could never love you the way you deserve. He could never-)

He's broken from his rapidly spiraling thoughts when you twitch, a tiny furrow appearing in your brow. A surge of emotion nearly bursts in his chest - the urge to comfort, to protect, to soothe - and he slowly circles to the other side of the bed, climbing into the empty space and settling beneath the blankets. Hesitantly, he wraps one arm lightly around your waist, drawing you against him with your back pressed tight to his chest.

His heart soars when he feels you instantly relax, the tension fleeing your body.

(It's fine. This is fine. He'll make everything better. No matter what he has to do, who he has to kill, he'll make everything better.)

A handful of days pass like that. When he stops by a market to get supplies for you, he gently tells you that it's best for you to stay in the ship for now; odds are that you actually have a bounty on your head as well, now.

(He's not wrong - but he also doesn't need to disable the button on the inside of the ship that opens the exit hatch. You don't need to know that; he doesn't need to acknowledge that.)

As time passes, he tries not to suffocate you, tries not to hover, wary of putting you under any more stress - but it's ultimately a useless task.

When you finally, tentatively ask him about going home, his brain goes numb, the world snapping into sharp focus. He turns his gaze to you, disturbingly absent of emotion.

"It ain't safe for ya there, now that those IPC dogs know to look for ya," he says, his voice far too even.

When tears begin to bud in your eyes, it finally sweeps up some sympathy in his chest, his entire face softening. He takes your shaking hands in his, tenderly grazing your knuckles with his thumbs.

"I'm sorry, sweetheart," he rasps, reaching up to wipe away your tears.

(He's barely sorry.)

"I don't like it either, but..."

(Yes, he does.)

"It's safest for ya to stick with me, alright?"

(Wishful thinking. He could find somewhere for you to stay - some quiet planet outside of the IPC's reach, where you could live without worry. He could send you credits regularly. He could make sure you were happy and secure, independent of him.)

(He could. He should.)

(He won't.)

[shawtylex09]

⋆˙⟡Looking. Shota Aizawa x Art Teacher!Fem!Reader.⟡⋆˙

⋆.˚✮Valentine’s Day story 2/14✮˚.⋆

Warnings; swearing, pining, stupidly silly interactions and Mic’s wingman-ness.

Masterlist

Enjoy babes ✧˖°.

🌸

⋆˚☆˖°⋆｡° ✮˖ ࣪ ⊹⋆.˚⋆˚☆˖°⋆｡° ✮˖ ࣪ ⊹⋆.˚⋆˚☆˖°⋆｡° ✮˖ ࣪ ⊹⋆.˚⋆˚☆˖°⋆｡° ✮˖ ࣪ ⊹⋆.˚

Shota walked into the teachers lounge, his tired eyes scanning the room, gazing upon the computers and a few of his colleagues chatting amongst each other. He sighed tiredly and walked to the counter, pouring himself a steaming hot cup of coffee.

He brought the hot cup to his lips and took a slow sip, enjoying the bitter taste of the black liquid on his tongue. He knew most people preferred coffee with either sugar or cream in it, but he was content to drink black coffee. It was simple.

That was the thing about it, it was plain, easy. It wasn’t complex with layers that could add unnecessary components to something that didn’t need to be complicated.

Shota admired the simpler things in life, opting for a minimalistic lifestyle. His apartment was pretty barren, aside from the records he had on a shelf with his record player, and the few pictures of Hizashi and Shirakumo he had on his walls.

He wasn’t one for complicated feelings, and opted out of them if he could. However, there was one thing he couldn’t pick the simple route with.

Shota dragged his tired eyes from his coffee, to Hizashi, seeing him laughing and talking with a certain someone.

A huff escaped the man through his nose as he felt a small heat crawl up to his ears. This was the one thing he couldn’t seem to make simple.

This new school year, a new teacher joined the teaching staff, along with All Might. She was beautiful, with a keen eye for art and detail.

This new teacher was soft spoken, considerate, and made his cold heart feel warm. He scoffed as he heard soft laughter at one of Hizashi’s horrible jokes, glancing up to see you speaking with him, covering your mouth.

He furrowed his brows, a small twinge of something along the lines of longing pulling at his heart strings. Damn him and his feelings.

Shota looked down at his coffee, seeing his reflection staring back at him. His tired eyes, shaggy hair, the scar under his right eye and his ungroomed face. He shouldn’t get wrapped up in someone- someone who wouldn’t look his way.

What Aizawa was unaware of, was the soft and tender gazes you shot his way. You were always looking at him, even if he wasn’t aware.

You glanced over at him and smiled softly, feeling a warm flutter in your chest, and a gentle heat rise to your cheeks.

Hizashi followed your gaze and grinned “Pretty interested in the coffee maker over there?” He asked, elbowing you with a smirk, his grin growing as you blushed a bit harder.

“Something like that” you said softly, your eyes still resting on the man enjoying his coffee, his eyes closing as he tilted his head back and sipped from his cup, his Adam’s apple bobbing as he drank down the hot coffee.

Hizashi clicked his tongue and sighed exasperatedly “you’re really looking at Shota, you got a crush on him or something?” He asked, raising a brow and crossing his arms, leaning closer to you as he also gazed at Aizawa.

You hummed and looked down, tucking your hair behind your ear “please, we’re not kids, Hizashi, crush is a strong word. More like..I find him endearing.”

Hizashi chuckled and turned his attention from his his high school best friend, to you, giving you a sympathetic smile “you know he’s the most emotionally closed off and emotionally constipated man on the planet, right?”

You simply blushed and rubbed the back of your neck, looking away from him with sligjtly puffed cheeks. He was taking your affectionate gazes rhetorical entirely wrong way! You weren’t expecting a relationship with Aizawa! You barely spoke to the guy!

It wasn’t like you had dreamt about how softly Shota would tuck your hair behind your ear, gently caressing your cheek with his calloused hand and murmuring softly to you with his heavenly voice, telling you how beautiful you were.

Noooo no no, that wasn’t it at all!….right?

You sighed and chewed on your cheek, thinking before hesitantly replying to Hizashi, “yeah..I’ve picked that up from him.” Was all you could say. You knew it was true, Aizawa wasn’t an open book when it came to anything. You knew little to nothing about the man, but that couldn’t stop your heart from yearning for his touch and delicate voice.

Hizashi smiled a little and sighed, patting your shoulder “There there, Y/n, it’s not like you’re totally hopeless! He is human, after all, so you’ve definitely got a chance to win him over!” He said with his cheery tone, almost making you forget about your conflicting feelings.

You offered a small smile to the man as he threw an arm around your shoulder, grinning back at you. “Thanks, Yamada, but I’m not expecting some crazy relationship or expecting him to open up his emotions with me. I’m sure these silly feelings will go away.”

Hizashi felt his smile falter, before he huffed. In all honesty, he’d been hoping your resolve was stronger than that, he didn’t want you to give up on his best friend! Even if his friend barely knew how to express his emotions, he was a very interesting and intelligent guy!

Hizashi let his arm fall from your shoulder and crossed them, leaning closer to you “Y/n, listen to me. Once you get to know Shota, he can be one of the -genuinely- most considerate and supportive guys I know. He gave me the drive I needed to finally start my dream of running a radio show, so trust me, he’s a great guy under the stoic facade he puts up.”

You felt your heart thump in your chest, a soft blush creeping up your cheeks. Aizawa did seem like the supportive type.

You rubbed your arm and glanced at the man, who’d migrated to his desk, grabbing some things and sifting through his folders. Did you really have a chance? Would he bat an eye at you? Would he reject you?

These thoughts swarmed your head as you gazed at him. However, your eyes caught the sight of a package of caramel hard candies sitting on his desk, Aizawa reaching into the pack and pulling one out, popping it into his mouth as he stood.

You furrowed your brows before an idea came to your mind. A smile formed on your lips and you glanced to Hizashi “I think..I think I’ll try and maybe get a bit closer to him, try and figure him out a bit before I jump into asking him out or anything like that.

Hizashi visibly brightened and grinned “wait actually? That’s awesome! Shota really needs someone to understand him and look out for him. He deserves it, you know?”

You nodded and glanced at Aizawa as he walked past you. You caught a whiff of his cologne and smiled, your knees feeling weak. “Yeah..I get what you mean” you mumbled, a stupid, small smile gracing your lips. Were you were really gonna try and get closer with someone as prickly as Shota Aizawa?

Yes.

Yes you were.

⋆˚☆˖°⋆｡° ✮˖ ࣪ ⊹⋆.˚⋆˚☆˖°⋆｡° ✮˖ ࣪ ⊹⋆.˚⋆˚☆˖°⋆｡° ✮˖ ࣪ ⊹⋆.˚⋆˚☆˖

Part 2

Thanks so so so much for reading! This is my first Aizawa one shot, and I’m thinking about making it a part two, soooo maybe there’ll be more! Anyways, have a wonderful night my beautiful people!

[scliffe]

I know most of us (including me) laughed (quite a lot) on this scene because; Earl Ciel “Sebastian-Kill-Them-All” Phantomhive of all people, is saying something like this about killing people? It sounds so fake and ridiculous right? Hypocritical, even. But I also think it’s rather empathetic of Ciel to say this in front of the Weston boys because he understands that these boys did not murder out of evil intent; it was a crime of passion, not premeditated. I’m sure that in Ciel’s eyes, these upperclassmen of his are still much more innocent than he is—and so when he speaks to them, he is speaking to “normal people”, not serial murderers. But while Ciel does not see the prefects as evil people, he doesn’t infantilize them either. He does not empathize with them trying to justify their actions; because things like school values or reputation is not a worthy cause for these boys to kill someone over. At the same time Ciel may not personally care about the lives of Derrick Arden and the others, but he does not think students should turn into murderers over such menial issues.

In comparison, when he speaks to Joker in BOC, he was unfiltered and candid—he’s speaking of something he personally believes; that deep cynicism and distrust in humanity. Unlike the Weston students, Joker’s actions were premeditated; he planned to kidnap children—knowing they would be abused and turned into some sick plaything before brutally murdered—and methodically eliminated witnesses to avoid getting caught. Joker knew exactly what he was doing when he organized these crimes to sacrifice others for his family’s lives. And yet the way Ciel spoke, he wasn’t passing judgement on Joker at all; he acutely understood the despair of facing injustice with no one lending a helping hand; the desperate wish to protect one’s family and loved ones above what’s considered to be morally correct by society; he knows better than anyone else how hell is paved with good intentions. This too, was incredibly empathetic in a strange way that only Ciel could be. Although Joker lamented their fate as abandoned orphans living in an apathetic society, Ciel does not pity them and thus did not simply reduce them to gullible victims of their circumstances. He did not justify Joker’s actions, and he did not justify his own actions in killing Joker and the circus crew either—he was incredibly self aware and fair; equally as ruthless to other people as with himself. He understood that everyone acted in their own interests. By removing complicated principles of morality out of the equation, he is able to see things clearly and act decisively without ridiculous notions of human morality. After all, what use does he have for it when his soul is already damned anyway?

Ciel keeps away from people and refrains from making personal attachments; and yet he is still very empathetic to each of them without even meaning to. In the flashbacks, he was also depicted to be a sensitive and kindhearted child. Despite everything he has gone through, he still retains a bit of that gentleness and sincerity from his childhood; which I think comes with being naturally emotionally intelligent—he has an unusually acute insight on people which certainly helps his business acumen, and ironically also helps him know how to lie and act in front of other people. While Sebastian is a “master of understanding human desires”, Ciel understands the complexity and most basic nature of humanity better than anyone else; which forms both his cynicism and his own brand of empathy.

[peachkkuma]

ᰍִ ۫͟ ͟ ☁️ ִ✧ 𝐌𝐀𝐍𝐈𝐅𝐄𝐒𝐓𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐌𝐘 𝐃𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐌 𝐋𝐈𝐅𝐄

hello, I’m Tiffany and this is my manifestation diary! If you haven’t read my previous diary entries yet, recently I’ve come to the realization that I’ve overcome all of my obstacles and there truly is nothing in my way except for me. So I made the decision yesterday to put my foot down and take the leap of faith, in other words, stop putting off manifesting my dream life because of fear. now this account will hold not just my diary entries but also the documentation of my journey to finally and seriously manifest my dream life.

╰┄┄┄┄┄┄┄┄ ♡ ♡ ♡ 05.21.2024

let’s begin!

ㅤㅤㅤ𝐈. ⊰ ۫ 🐻‍❄️ ◌ ִ ੭ ˑ DEFINING THE OBJECTIVE

I want to make the end goal a bit more clear, the term dream life is both pretty straightforward and a bit vague. what would I like my dream life to include? how would my dream life make me feel? and ofc, I’m not just manifesting my dream life, I’m manifesting my dream self. what would my self concept be? how would I like to be?

tiffany’s dream life check list - what it means to live my dream life

attend my dream school

be 100% perfectly healthy (physically, mentally, emotionally, in every way basically)

have good eating habits and a good relationship with food

have perfect straight A pluses (revision to previous grades as well)

have the perfect friend group for me

healthy, super soft, hydrated, moisturized, smooth clear skin (and elimination of acne genes) (body + face)

perfect tangle free hair at all times, pretty, voluminous, bombshell hair

a healthy, perfect, loving relationship with everyone in my family

own a super cute and fluffy golden retriever puppy

high paying jobs for my parents <3

have a rolls royce with a pink exterior

grow taller

have every single clothing item I’ve saved on Pinterest

have my YouTube channel blow up

complete head to toe desired appearance

desired lifestyle

perfect eyesight

be super good at makeup and have all desired products

have a gorgeous bedroom

have a very active and lively social life

have the perfect, most ideal school, social, and home life

completely healed phone addiction

have a lot of desired hobbies that I’m very good at

have a fun and eventful life, always have fun plans and something going on

be on the right track career-wise

elimination of social anxiety and shyness

high self esteem and confidence

be more in touch with my culture

be a complete master at manifestation

huh, this is shorter and less serious than I thought it’d be, ig this was also a way of getting out of my own head. I thought manifesting my dream life would be a bit challenging for some reason, but ig a dream life rlly isn’t as complex as I thought it was. I mean now I feel silly, it’s just a dream life! nothing more than a lifestyle and a few personal fixes. I feel like I just got humbled.

𝐈𝐈. ʚ ⊹ ִ⏲️ 𑁯͟ ɞ THE OUTLINE

alright, I know what I want and I know how manifestation works. but just to make sure I don’t over complicate anything or things dont get confusing, I’ll create a sort of plan or outline. Little steps I can fall back on if I get a bit lost.

step number one we have covered, have a desire

step number two, put your foot down and make the firm decision that you have it. this decision is for good, nothing u do can take this decision away so don’t u dare worry about “ruining progress” or “messing up”— u’re better than that.

step number three, once you’ve decided it’s done, it’s done. the only and I mean it when I say only thing for you to do is to act like it. imagine you, the creator of your reality, making the decision that you have something only to then be like “is it coming?” “do I have it?” BE FR!! act like you have it, think like you have it, and see the world as if you have it— because you do. you decided you did, didn’t u? It’s ur reality, what u say, goes. and no, you’re not acting like u have it to get something out of the 3D, you’re doing it for your sanity. Because you deserve a break, you deserve relief, you deserve to be the you that has it all!! let yourself be in the sowf because why shouldn’t u be certain you have it? don’t entertain anything that says u don’t. getting in the sowf is easy, u deciding u have it is all the confirmation u need. there’s no reason for u to not be certain u have it.

sowf = knowing that u have it

step number four, optional not necessary but it’s really gonna help and is fun. immerse yourself in the new story. experience it!! have fun!! u finally got what u want, u finally r who u want to be, so choose to live that life!! try methods for the sake of fulfilling urself (never to make anything appear in the 3D, u know better, 3D desperation doesn’t get anybody anywhere.) try out methods to have fun and be more familiar with having what u want.

that’s it girl, that’s all u gotta do, that’s all u ever had to do. decide it, experience it, assume it. u don’t always have to feel “good” or “happy” u just have to know u have what u want, u just have to assume. the goal is to truly know that u have it, to be faced with the 3D and still know it in ur bones u have what u want. u deserve to trust urself like that, u deserve to be fulfilled like that, and u deserve those things from YOU not from the 3D. U deserve to feel secure in urself, don’t let ur security come from the 3D. loa bloggers mean it when they say the materialization is simply the cherry on top and I get that now. For me, it’s about being able to depend and trust urself, to rely on urself, and in that way everything else comes off the pedestal.

✉️ : ahhh I forgot to finish up this post yesterday but here it is!! I’m so excited!! part two to come soon ♡