#and by good I mean better than just ehhhh

[schoenpepper]

Despite Everything (It's Still You)

Intro: When he looks at you, he sees everything he could have been.

Warnings: bad grammar, awful writing, not proofread, kinda angsty, more platonic im pretty sure cus its not specified if ur lovers, might be ooc idk and idc, everytime i write idia i feel 10 years older because i cringe at my own internet slang

A/N: Done! Last request is finished, hope you like it worm anon. On my end, this is super rushed and it's not like, my fave ever so ehhhh.

Masterlist

Riddle thought he’d found a comrade in you. Out of everyone in Twisted Wonderland, he’d thought you would be the one to understand him.

He sees it in your posture, always straight and never slouching. You’re good with academics, a diligent student. Like Riddle, you’d gone through life with the iron fist of a well-meaning parent, so surely, you understand him, right? You agree with him. You believe that rules are important to be upheld lest society fall into chaos. It’s such a refreshing feeling to find a person who, like him, thinks that structure and stability are core values of a proper community.

But you don’t. You don’t understand. No one does. His consciousness is flickering between ink and reality. He’s slipping into the grasp of the phantom and he feels himself slowly being consumed. He’s being devoured. Right before the overblot, even you had stood against him. Why? Riddle wasn’t wrong, he was never wrong—the rules aren’t wrong. Because if they are, then what did he lose his entire childhood for? So you must be the one at fault. This is your mistake. You just don’t understand. You tell him that the rules and the competence and the structure matter less than people. You try to convince him that there’s a better way of living. Is there?

Riddle doesn’t know why. He’d thought you were a comrade because he saw his own experiences in yours, but he’d never been so wrong. While he was still caught up in the chains of his mother’s words, you’d already broken free from the cage. You help him to reclaim the shards of childish wonder he’d never been allowed to have. You help him learn how to breathe, how to relax. Little by little, you bring him onto your path.

He doesn’t understand you anymore.

Leona doesn’t have any opinions about you. You never really talked to him at first, and he can respect that; you don’t go out of your way for bothersome, meaningless things.

Every time he sees you, you’re sleeping or slacking off. Whatever, it’s not like he can judge you for it. You also have a real competitive streak for spelldrive, and your wit’s not half bad, especially when compared to the muscle heads in his dorm. Clever and snarky, talented and strong. He can respect you. Maybe just barely, and he’ll never admit it, but he sees a part of himself in you. So, a sort-of equal. He’s still better than you though.

The taste of sand lingers on his tongue as it swirls in the air through the storm. There’s a part of himself he can no longer control. It makes him wrap his fingers around Ruggie’s throat and Leona… He doesn’t want this. But he can’t stop. He can still recognize you on the edge of his vision. Weren’t you just like him? At birth, everything good was handed right over to your older sibling, leaving nothing but scraps for you. You found it unfair too, didn’t you? So why are you standing against him? This is his chance to be someone worth more than his birthright. Why…are you not agreeing with him?

Leona tried to stay away from you. But call it his instinct or whatever; he can’t seem to avoid you at all. The second prince of Sunset Savanna is awestruck by your words. You tell him that birth doesn’t determine everything. You tell him that you’d learned from your own past. That you can still make something of yourself without that which was given. You sure are chatty now, but who is he to stop you?

You’re not his equal. You’d long since left him in the dust.

Azul sees you as an opportunity. He likes you, really, because you know how to do business and you find a way to compromise that doesn’t step on either person’s lines.

It’s not difficult for him to find out about your past, and to be honest, he’s greatly delighted to find out about all that you have in common. Did you feel the way he did when he was isolated and bullied? Did you feel his pain? You were an outcast too, weren’t you? But wow, look at you (and him) now! It’s rare he sees someone as diligent as himself, as cunning and as smart. Resourceful and oh so benevolent, you’d fit right into Octavinelle!

He’d steered himself long ago; he would never be weak again. He had long, long since forgotten humiliation and defeat. But he’s here again. This time, defeat was brought by your hands. Azul had thought you were allies. Business partners, at least. Why betray him like this? Don’t you get it? He’s powerful now! Why try to stop him? Why did you succeed? He’s left in the aftermath of heartache and debris. He doesn’t know why he did the things he did, but he’s sure that he was so close to being all-powerful. Perfect. A being so beautiful and flawless and strong… You took that chance away from him.

Azul wants you out of his life—your presence now is only a reminder of everything he could have been, and everything he failed to be. Unlike him, you’ve already moved on. You’ve learned to forgive your tormentors, and most importantly, you’ve learned to forgive yourself. You tell him that it was never his fault, but that revenge was never meant to be the answer.

He finds that he had nothing in common with you, after all.

Jamil is perceptive. Next to the one who’s attracting the attention of the whole room with a bright smile and sunny disposition, he finds a kindred spirit in you.

You seem responsible enough, and like a mirror, he sees you taking care of that person the way he does with Kalim. It’s easy to pierce through your act because he knows how to do it too. Seemingly not too smart, not too dumb, not too strong, not too weak. You’re good at pretending to be average. Like Jamil, you’ve lived a life of servitude. Are you tired of forced humility? Of feeling like your life isn’t worth anything when compared to the one you serve?

He’s tired too. He’s so, so tired. Why was freedom unreachable to Jamil right from the moment he was conceived? Was he unworthy of a life unbound by shackles? You’re looking at him like he’s a stranger. Jamil looks at you like you’re a mirror. A mirror that’s shattered, and damaged, and every piece is covered with ink and regret. You know what he’s been through, so why are you in his way? You should be an accomplice. Do you not yearn to be your own person? The phantom is whispering promises he knows it won’t keep. But nothing is more tempting than just…one day of happiness. Of his own happiness.

Jamil is inevitably drawn to you. You live so brightly; you see your master as a friend. You tell him he doesn’t need to do the same. That the only thing he needs to do is find a way that works for him. And you’re asking about things he hadn’t thought of before. An employment contract? The legal status of slavery in the Scalding Sands? Wait, you’re serving that person out of your own volition in exchange for salary and other related benefits?

In you, he sees a light at the end of the tunnel.

Vil approves of you. Like looking in a mirror almost, he sees beauty and a passionate drive to remain beautiful in every single way.

You’re a person with a consistent goal and a persistent drive to do better and be better; a hard worker with tenacity like that of the Queen herself. You are no potato. You are a diamond that has found a way to shine uniquely, and like him, you are already a master at your chosen profession. And yet, he sees the trophies and the medals are all silver and never gold. It is frustrating, but Vil knows that you as well know what it’s like to always be second best.

He’d worked so hard. He’d tried his very best. Professional music and choreography, styling and costumes. He’d set up a multi-week boot camp for his team members in order to whip them into shape. It’s all swept away by that person. Again. And again. And again and again and again and— No. No more. He will take matters into his own hands. But you stand in front of him with a familiar determination, only this time, you’re determined to stop him. Rook had betrayed him and now, you do too. Is he not worthy of a victory? Not even once? The blot is so, so ugly. But if it means he’ll get to wipe out everything that’s opposed to him, he’ll take that blot and use it to his own advantage. Like the queen who’d disguised herself as an ugly witch in order to take down the princess; everything can be sacrificed for the sake of ultimate beauty. If you’re not with him, you must be against him.

Vil apologizes sincerely for his faults. He knows he was wrong, even if it hurts his pride to admit it. But you accept him so easily, so readily, he can’t believe you’re acting like he’d never even hurt you. You forgive him. You help him accept his losses and continue to strive. Because you’d been in his position before, but you’d grown to be happy and appreciate the wins in life instead.

You are no mirror image of him. You are better.

Idia’s never been this happy before; through his screen is someone who just gets him. You’re good at games, and an introvert too? Score!

It’s not like, ever, that someone who vibes with his genius just comes strolling through his life, so Magicord bears witness to long, late night chats about anything and everything. You’ve got some real fucked up childhood trauma too, big mood tbh. It’s easy to spill his guts out over the internet, because even then, you still don’t really know him. You like the games and animes that he likes, and he’s so glad that for once, there’s a person out there who’s lived through the same villain-arc that he has.

He can’t rebuild the world if so many noobs are trying to stop him. Why? What’s so wrong with wishing for a world that can fit him and Ortho right in? Why is that too much for him to ask for? Why are you, the person he thought was his cool moots, acting up too? Don’t you like Ortho? Bro…no…you’re not actually doing a protagonist monologue rn, are you? Seriously? You think you can defeat him and his phantom through the power of friendship? Lolz, you’re so lame. If the world was a fairytale, he wouldn’t have been born with this dumb curse. If the world was a fairytale, he would never have been trapped in STYX with no way out. If the world was a fairytale, Ortho would still be alive. But it’s not. So he’ll remake it to be the story he’d always dreamt it to be.

Idia thinks you’re 110% cringe, like actually barf-inducing. But you did kinda save him or whatevs, so he can put up with you. Like, begrudgingly yk. You’re just such a weirdo. He really thought you were just like him, but no. You’ve had therapy. That’s like, actually wild. You try to counsel him too, talking about feelings and whatnot, and how to move past grief so that it no longer consumes you from the inside out.

So it turns out you didn’t have a villain arc like Idia did. You’re the main hero.

Malleus finds you absolutely delightful. To see another who can speak to him without fear or nervousness is a marvelous thing that he cherishes.

You are no fae or long-lived species, but he finds you fascinating. You are intelligent and wise beyond your years. You are powerful in your own right. You are familiar, in every sense of the word. Even your experiences seem to be shared. You’d been orphaned too, and experienced loss and grieved. You’d mourned for far too many loved ones who have left before you. Do you see the present as he does? Do you embrace the past as he does?

The world is a sad, sad place. He would like to change it. Into one with happy ever afters, into one where there is no hunger and no poverty. There will be no suffering. In his hands, he will mold the world into one that is kinder to its people. There will be no death and separation. He’s had far too many of those, enough to last his long lifetime. He’s not wrong. So why…why do you stand against him, weapon pointed towards him? The only thing he wishes for is permanence. Do you not see the vision? There is so much sadness in the world, why do you choose to wake from your beautiful slumber and face it head on? No matter. He will help you, even if you deny him.

Malleus is more than happy to take your hand when it is outstretched towards himself. You teach him so many things he hadn’t realized before, like how to cherish the present and treasure each memory more than attempting to find a solution to make them everlasting. He had believed wholly that he was right; that the answer to death was a long period of dreams in which everyone lives in a happy ending. He had believed you to be similar to himself—he is wrong about many, many things.

You’ve always looked to a brighter future than he could even imagine.

[butchtwelfthdoctor]

ok so death and the queen in Really Really good and you should all listen to it ( here it is!!) but there another one of those bits where donna gone off to do something and ten thinks shes leaving Forever but THIS. THIS. LITERALLY HE JUST SAYS THAT?

(sorry for the bad audio quality i was recording it off my computer speakers into garageband lol its wayyy better than that in the actual thing)

Transcript

[end of doctor who theme]

Ten : I'm sorry, because, I lied to you.

Donna : Oh? About What?

Ten : I said... I was fine. Fine about you leaving, and, I'm not. So many of you have come and gone, I never get used to it, you'd think I would've done by now, but, but, but, no... just when I think it's all going well, and we'll be... together forever, you're wandering off to go and save another universe, or, get married - How do you lot fall in love so quickly?

Donna : Well,

Ten, interrupting : I just don't get it!

Donna : Funny you should say that,

Ten : It's- ehhhh short lives I suppose - still! So long as you're happy, and, you're with the right man, and, and, he is the right man,

Donna - *starts to speak, gets cut off*

Ten : Yeahhs yes of course he is-

Donna : mhm-

Ten : -course he is I mean - I mean, well, no man ever gonna be good enough for my Donna, but yes, yes! Off you go, every time, one of you leaves, I'm not ready, I never am. You lot. Euurgh. *sharp inhale* Every one of you a heartbreaker.

Donna, indignantly : That's why you've got two of them, stupid, listen, I'm -

Ten : I mean yeah, I s'pose, but it doesn't make it -

Donna : mHMHMmm

Ten : - make it any easier, you all leave... even the robot dog left me. Twice.

Donna : Alright, Doctor, I'm trying to tell you-

Ten : And another thing - the universe never gives me a break!

End Transcript

[anitalianfrie]

I am begging you to translate this: https://www.instagram.com/reel/C7eN1flsqvO/?igsh=Y3R5MGFuMWdiZzNr

(It is several minutes long though and will probably be a huge pain so no pressure!)

sure! here's the link . I recommend watching the video while you read this bc the volg is cut really weird, there's not one long conversation and what happens in the video is pretty useful to understand what's going on in the translation. unfortunately i wasn't able to translate some bits, but i tried my best

as always, my comments/specifications are in between []

Mig: hello everyone, I've arrived at bez's house. Cele's not here yet

Mig: hey

Bez: sium

Mig: I couldn't not start a video like this, could i?

Bez: with the plane

Mig: with the plane. it gives it the look of a vlog, doesn't it? We're waiting for Cele

Bez: the excruciating wait

--

Cele: I'm at the roundabout, the one with the car dealers

Bez: what car dealer bro?

Cele: ehhhh, the ones that-

mig: what kind of question is that

Cele: i don't know, anyways i'm here, two minutes and i'm there

Bez: okay, okay

Mig: two minutes like those before, or two real minutes?

Bez: sorry, but what car does he have?

Cele: the Cupra

Bez: yes, here he is, here he is

Mig: listen to him

Mig: tac!

Mig: in the end, [something i don't get]

Bez: we're ready

Cele: the boots for Mugello, because I go to Mugello. With stile.

Mig: well, it's not like those boots are super new. Understandable. you- why-

Bez: one different from the other

Mig: one different from the other

Cele: obviously. I even have another pair even more broken

Mig: but the backpack is the right one

Cele: yes [something i don't get]

Mig: well i mean, we stay away the night but, whatever. everybody- this pair [of boots] is in a bit of a better state than the other one

Cele: yes. better. [cele shows the boot to the camera]

Mig: this one is perfect

Cele: nooo

Mig: two left boots

Bez: but the others are left and right

Cele: yes, I know, but-

Mig: what shoe size do you wear?

Cele: but what if I slip on the left?

Mig: what's your shoe size bro?

Cele: 40, 41, 42

Mig: You can borrow mine

[here's the song they were listening to in the car]

--

--

Franky: Marco

Bez: Franky! how is it?

Franky: everything's okay

Mig: hi Chicco! [chicco is usually the nickname given to people named federico. knowing mig this is a reference of some sort i'm not able to place]

Bez: yes, we were doing a round fo calls, we wanted to know how you were

Franky: everythings alright

Franky: there's also Celestino, what is he doing

Cele: hi Franco

Franky: what is he doing?

BEz: he's here, he's here

Mig: hi Franco!

Franky: hi Celes!

Cele: hi!

[i assume bez's laugh here is bc franco is completely ignoring mig wich. hilarious to me]

Franco: hi!

--

[second song they were listening to. yes it's calcutta i almost couldn't believe my ears]

mig: we're here. one hour and- almost two hours later

--

Bez: ohi where are you?

Pecco: at the hotel

Bez: in hotel?

Pecco: have you arrived yet?

Bez: ah so you've arrived before us

Pecco: well, obviously

Mig: we're here

Bez: we've arrived just now

Pecco: ok, then now we'll go downstairs, let's meet in the lobby at eight. which is now.

Bez: we're here now, now we park

Mig: i would do the check in, and then we go back downstairs

--

Mig: here they are, here they are

Mig: it's like in shining

Cele: we can go to misano directly tomorrow

Pecco: if we go back in time, we go

--

Mig: hello everyone, ehhh we're ready we've woken up and now we go to the circuit, we go to the others

Mig: now, where are our champions? Let's go see near the car. oh, here they are

Mig: Come on! Good morning! Let's go, come on! and sbam!

--

Mig: you do the greeting, this is the classical greeting when you arrive at the circuit, you rise your hand

--

Guy: - because we were thinking of putting down the names of singers, or-

Cami: the name on the transponder is the name of a singer

Pecco: for me either Steve Taylor or Francesco Renga. Now i have to decide

Franco: good morning

--

Mig: ehhh, what's the theme? Singers or bands, or like is it the same...

Guy: singers

--

Mig: my denstist will be proud of me. Shoutout to Doctor Bausi, he's the number one. Super important [something i don't get bc of the toothbrush]

Bez: you cut three, four tens of a second each lap

--

[all the conversations in the box were either very difficult to hear or with too little context to make them translatable (or even useful to translate) sorry]

--

Mig: well guys, this is all, from the track, now the return trip awaits us

--

Mig: that's true, we stayed on the phone the whole time, but now we're here.

Bez: yeah

Mig: bye. we're here, and nothing else. we go home, it was amazing, and... do you have something to declare to end this- here there's a knee slider by the way, i guess it's vietti's... is it yours?

Bez: i declare that.. this return trip has been one of the greatest trip of all time, with a group phone call of...

Mig: one hour and fifteen

Bez: one hour and fifteen

Mig: since before Bologna

Bez: we never felt alone, we felt cuddled by our friends

Cele: we never felt this close

--

Mig: there's a spider, it doesn't open

Bez: can i say it now? you didn't do as you- what is that, what rug is that?

Mig: it's nice isn't it

Bez: where did you stole it from?

Mig: i bought it. I bought it from Toriani, a carpet- from Toriani Tavullia's hardware store, a rug with the sun and the moon, for a step, this a step rug

--

Mig: bye everyone, it's been great

Cele: thank you [while hugging bez]

Mig: it's been a pleasure

[jacksgreysays]

Hiiii how about a prompt for Further Down Road One, political marriage!Shikasuke, maybe something from an Uchiha's POV on the Shikabane-hime's meteoric rise in power, international acclaim, and political capital? And how it ripples out onto the clan as a whole?

I mean, the point of Road One is that the arranged marriage itself already does SO MUCH to change the trajectory of the Uchiha clan’s fate for the better that, basically, everything else after that is kind of a bonus. The fact that Shikako’s smart and powerful and a good person is NICE, yes, but just being engaged to Sasuke already earned so much approval from the clan as a whole that it’s just kinda… ehhhh…

Although… and this somewhat of a tangent to the prompt… it would be funny if… okay, let me set this up by saying: I don’t necessarily like Itachi as a character. When he was kind of a psychopath and apparently just murdered his entire family to test his power, that was at least a… strength of will or conviction that kind of resonated thematically. Like, what if Will of Fire goes bad kind of thing. Or the pressures of being clan heir, of being pushed too hard and too fast, would lead to a genius of violence snapping and using said violence. Then when it turns out he was given orders to murder his entire family and his one condition was that Sasuke would get to live is like… what the fuck dude. It’s both backtracking to make Itachi weaker as a character and also, somehow, even more of a psychopath in my opinion. And, like, sure, Danzo maybe used Shisui’s Sharingan to unbreakable genjutsu him into it, but I don’t think that really absolves Itachi.

All that being said, theoretically in this kinder world of Road One, we never get to that point. Additionally, there’s less pressure on Itachi to continue to excel SO OVERTLY since the clan isn’t getting isolated and also because Shisui is still there and alive to share the burden.

BUT, I do still… the idea that the Uchiha elders have been wanting one of the clan to become Hokage is something that I hold to be true unless proven otherwise. I do think the clan elders would push more for Itachi to be Hokage—because he is clan heir and so has the pedigree, while Shisui (just as powerful, literally Flee On Sight in the bingo books at such a young age) I think we’ve fandom agreed is an orphan or at least a lesser branch of the Uchiha clan.

Anyway, all of the above leads me to: Shisui and Itachi trying to PR campaign for their sister-in-law Shikako (who WILL be an Uchiha once the marriage actually) to be the new “best candidate” for an Uchiha Hokage. Like, really just them listing off all of her accomplishments to not only the Uchiha elders but the rest of the clan (who, again, already quite like her).

I also think, in this universe, that Shikako would DO SOMETHING about Sora-ku once she feels a little more comfortable making decisions—or, at least, making proposals with attached logistics—for the Uchiha clan. Like. It’s a huge chunk of territory that seems to be an abandoned city. But it’s apparently functional enough to have a community of sorts of black marketeers and a support system. Like, it’s not so out of the way of things that nobody bothers with it, which implies that it could be rejuvenated with the time and resources. I think I read a theory once that it’s because Senju used their skills to desertify the area so there just wasn’t enough food to support a city of that size. BUT, now they’ve got Shikako. And Shikako’s connections. Whether that is the ANY clan alliance or Tenzo/Yamato or upper echelons of Hidden Mist’s administration (Haku is an ice user, yes, but like he and Zabuza wouldn’t throw a squad of Mist nin with water nature to help with irrigation at Shikako’s request for free) or even the literal oasis creating ancient god Gelel.

So, you know, she’s more than proven herself to the world. And with the Sora-ku rejuvenation, already brought a level of prosperity to the Uchiha clan than they could ever imagine. “Shikako for Hokage” is not a hard sell for Shisui and Itachi whatsoever (and also, they do think Sasuke would be so happy as her First Gentleman/trophy husband)

Yeah, that’s kind of all I can think of for this prompt in terms of it being different than how the Nara clan or DoS canon clans for that matter would view her meteoric rise. Hope you enjoyed, anon.

[dreamingroleplayer]

🌹💐🌺 🌹💐🌺🌹

SNEEZE ROLEPLAY AHEAD [M4F]

🌺💐🌹🌺💐🌹🌺

Do you like intriguing character dynamics?

Do you like sneezing?

Even better, do you like sneezy men with sensitive noses who progressively end up losing more and more of their composure with each hitched breath and sniffle?

Do you like being the reason (voluntarily or not) of such allergic fits?

If so, you're in luck!

I'm once again in search for a partner with which to play a snz roleplay with, and this time with a little more experience up my sleeve~!

It could either be based on a fandom or with original characters, though I personally have a reference for the latter, but be it what it is, I ADORE detail and thought put behind the story, so if you too are a nerd for storytelling and chemistry between the characters, I'm sure we'll get along just fine ^^

Now onto the snz stuff... Honestly, there are so many options I have the embarrassment of choice, but I think that starting with the general themes could be a good idea.

What I'm absolutely sure is that I enjoy being the person that gets induced to sneeze. Wether that has to do with the fact I also normally play sub roles might be related... So, if you're looking for someone to ruin his sinuses as well as his dignity, look no further~

And as for the methods of sneezing, a quick essential list could look something like this, you could call them my kinks:

- Perfumes

- Hair

- Flowers

- Smoke

- Feathers/fur

- Sneezing dusts

Of course, every (and I mean EVERY) combination of those is very well accepted, but of the dynamic is just as important! For me, the only important thing is having the other character directly being the source of my character's sneezes, and from there it can be either done subtly but with a teasing fake innocence, genuinely without a clue that her actions cause him to sneeze, or even openly torturing him with sneezy inductions and challenging him to resist! Your imagination is the only limit~

As a last thing, here are a couple of wonderful scenarios I found for some inspiration ;)

- "Don’t worry, I’m just getting started,” Character A (yours) said with a grin as she revealed the feather. B (my character) shivered with anticipation. A laughed. “I think we should give it a bit more of a test before going all out. We have plenty of time for that, don’t worry.” Twirling the feather in front of his nose teasingly, she inched it closer at a torturously slow pace. “Oh come on, you know I don’t have that much patience, ple-ih,” he hitched suddenly as A finally let the feather lightly graze the tip of his nose. “Patience or not, we both know the build up is the best part,” She teased, twirling the feather unexpectedly against his nostrils. "Heh eh hiiiiiih , Oh that tickles so muh-much,” He sniffed, pulling some of the small feather fibers a tiny bit inside his nostrils and dramatically increasing the itch.  "Heh eh ehhhh..." He groaned, the tickle backing off just enough that she couldn’t sneeze as She pulled the feather back. “Aw, that means it’s doing its job. It’s making your nose extra sensitive~" She murmured teasingly. “Here, I have another idea.” She pulled B’s head toward her, guiding him to nuzzle into her neck. “Mmmh... that’s n-nice...” He said dazed as he snuggled closer, closing his eyes just like A was hoping he would. Suddenly, he felt the ends of A’s hair starting to trace teasingly around his nostrils just like the feather had. Caught by surprise and still tickly from before, B couldn’t hold back. "Hitchiew! Hetchiew! Heh eh eh hetchiew! Hitchiew! Hitchiew! O-oh God, that was so much stronger than... Be-before... Wha- hah hatchiew!”

- Character A has long, silky hair woven with fragrant (and pollen-loaded) flowers, and is sat right besides character B . Every toss of her locks would make them inevitably fall over B's face and nose, tickling him mercilessly with the strands and dousing his senses with the heady, irritating aroma, his nose and sinuses burning, eyes teary. She could be either genuinely or fakely surprised by B's allergy, gasping and saying out loud "Doesn't anyone have a handkerchief? Look at my poor sneezy colleague" here she begins to look around, and every sharp movement of her head fills the air with pollen from the flower in her hair and only amping up B's torment ^^

- A and B are running late for an important formal event, both rushing getting ready. Suddenly, A quickly spray herself with some perfume while the poor A passes right besides her, getting caught in the crossfire and accidently breathing all that flowery aroma. Quiet hitches began to be hear, he knows he cant afford sneezing right know after getting all ready however his nose thinks otherwise. Twitching and quivering, he ends up sneezing repeatedly ruining his outfit completely

- B's steps echoed through the forest, each one causing the veil of dried twigs and leaves to crackle under his feet. It were hours, or maybe even days that he was wandering aimlessly in those woods in search for the ancient artifact, but until then it seemed like all he did was walking in circles. The tediousness of his task was almost driving him crazy, and he was constantly on the verge of giving up for good, but for better or for worse his determination dictated him to continue. And then it happened. At first, it seemed almost like a mirage, likely given how thoroughly exhausted he was, but upon closer inspection the figure (A) he saw moving amidst the foliage became more and more definite. From occasional glimpses of white and purple, he could then make out the outline of a body, a feminine one, and its erratic movements less and less dictated by chaos... It was a dance, performed by what would have been a normal woman hadn't it been for a pair of pointy ears and a long, luxurious white tail that flowed behind her and bounded with every step she took. Awestruck, he walked closer without even considering what to say, such was his curiosity, but be it for distraction or a deliberate choice, once he was just a couple of feet from her, she suddenly twirled, making her fluffy tail swipe right across his face like a gentle caress. Upon impact, a cloud of shimmering specks of some kind of dust wafted from it, and the combined effects of its tickly fur and flower-like fragrance made his eyes flutter, and his nose start to twitch. From there, a tingling sensation spread across his body

⚠️ Last thing to add is that I don't paritucularly enjoy the mess aspect of it (mucus, saliva, bodily fluids), but apart from that, I'm eager to hear you people's wonderful ideas!

What else to say? If this sounds like what you're looking for, and you're eager to irritate those red nostrils, don't hesitate to hit me up~✨

[reashot]

Part 9 of 9 days of Lancaster. Wedding/ Jaune finally gets cucked for being dense. And the return of Mr. Wolfie.

This the happiest day of her life and yet Ruby Rose or soon to be Ruby Pine-Rose. Can't stop herself from pacing around in her wedding dress inside the bride's waiting room while talking to herself.

Ruby: Oh what do I do, what do I do. I know I shouldn't go through with this. I mean marriage?I'm not ready for it!

Jaune: *opens door* Ruby are you ready yet?

Ruby: Jaune! *runs up to hug Jaune*

Jaune: Hey Ruby. It's nice to see you too. But please be careful not to scrumped up your dress before the wedding.

Ruby: I don't care it's my wedding day and I want to spend it anyway I want. And I want to spend it with my best friend in the whole of remnant.

Jaune: Really, your best friend. So I'm a better friend compared to Weiss, Blake and Yang then?

Ruby: Ehhhh.... I'm going to say you ranked somewhere below them.

Jaune: Ouch!

Ruby: B-but at least you are my best male friend.

Jaune: Even more than Sun?

Ruby: Ehhh....

Jaune: Fine. I know when I'm not wanted. I'll be seeing you after the ceremony Ruby...

Ruby: Wait Jaune please come back. I'm sorry if I hurt your feeling. But I don't want to be alone right now. *sniff* Please Jaune. I need you. I can't handle this all by myself

Jaune: *hugs her tighter* It's okay Ruby I was just joking. I knew you didn't mean it.

Ruby: Well it's not funny. I thought you really hate me for real... You might not be my best male friend but you are important to me. So much so, that I can't see myself without you.

Jaune: Then tell me what's been bothering you?

Ruby: I-I don't think I can go through with it. I don't want to get married to Oscar.

Jaune: Ruby.... You don't mean that. You Love Oscar.

Ruby: I do love him... But I can't shake the feeling that I'm doing the wrong thing.

Jaune: Ruby that's just the jitter talking.

Ruby: What if it isn't. What if I'm making a big mistake by marrying Oscar?

Jaune: You're not. Any person you choose for marriage can't possibly be wrong. And I trust you.

Ruby: Jaune do you want to run away together?

Jaune: What?

Ruby: Let's run away. It'll be just the two of us together. We can go travel across Remnant as two travelling Huntsman.

Jaune: You're not making any sense Ruby. Think about your family and friends that will be affected by this.

Ruby: Yeah... You're right I was just kidding.

Jaune: Look. It's not like I don't understand where it's coming from but relax, Rubes. You have nothing to worry about. And if you're still feeling nervous I know someone that can help with that.

Ruby: Really, who?

Jaune: *Rubs Ruby's head* That's something for you to know later. *kiss Ruby's cheek* See you at the Altar Ruby.

Ruby: *blush* (how could he just kissed the bride on her wedding day. Stupid Jaune, but thank you.)

The wedding Hall.

After finally getting the "courage" She needed from Jaune. Ruby finds herself infront of the red carpet leading to her own altar.

Ruby: (This is it Ruby. No more excuses. You got this. It's not like your wedding day is some sort of a life altering event that will have an impact for the rest of your life.... OMG I can't do this!!! I can't do this.)

Mr. Wolfie: Hi there Ruby, why are you sad on your happiest day?

Ruby: Mr. Wolfie... Jaune. Why do you have my old plushie in your hands?

Mr Wolfie?: I'm not Jaune. My Name is Mr. Wolfie. And I'm your best friend in the whole wide world. So tell your best friend what's wrong?

Ruby: *giggle* So stupid... But that's so you. All right I'll play along. I'm having second thought about marrying the man I love and I might need a little encouragement to get me going.

Mr Wolfie?: Oh what are you suggesting?

Ruby: I want you to kiss me on the lips...

Mr Wolfie?: Oh? Ok then Ruby. *use the plushie to kiss Ruby*

Ruby: That's not what I meant... I mean. Thank you Jaune.

Jaune: Do you feel better now?

Ruby: Very. Thank you for the kiss and good bye Jaune...

Jaune: Good bye Ruby...

[twistedtummies2]

Top 5 WORST Dracula Portrayals

Anyone who knows me well by now should also know that one of my favorite stories of all time is Bram Stoker’s Dracula. I love the book, and I love seeing how the story and its titular character are reimagined throughout the breadth of pop culture. And there are PLENTY of reimaginings and adaptations to go around: Count Dracula, alongside Sherlock Holmes, is one of the most frequently reinterpreted characters in the history of fiction. Of course, with so many interpretations, there are plenty of great Draculas out there: Christopher Lee, Bela Lugosi, Max Schreck, Gary Oldman, and more. But with the good must also come the bad: there are a LOT of really terrible Dracula movies and portrayals out there, just as there are a lot of really fun ones… …And I actually haven’t seen many of them. Well…actually, I suppose I have, but it depends on what you’re really looking at. For example, I love John Carradine’s PORTRAYAL of Dracula, but the movies he was actually in were often sub-par. Grandpa from “The Munsters” and the version from “Hotel Transylvania” are comical, incompetent buffoons, but they’re meant to be parody characters and I like them for the humor and campy silliness they provide. There are even a couple of Draculas that a lot of people seem to dislike that I actually think are okay. I have no big problem with Rudolf Martin from “Buffy the Vampire Slayer” (admittedly, this may partially be because I have only watched all of two episodes of that show), nor with Richard Roxburgh from “Van Helsing,” yet in researching this list, I found out that a LOT of people REALLY dislike those interpretations, as an example. Finally, it’s worth pointing out that I have, in fact, DELIBERATELY AVOIDED watching several bad Draculas because…well…they’re bad. And I KNOW they’re bad. Why in the world would I want to watch something that is notoriously terrible, aside from just…ascertaining that it IS, in fact, terrible. So, for instance, I haven’t seen “Dracula in Istanbul,” “Blacula,” “Dracula’s Dog,” and/or many, many other horrendously dreadful renditions that have gained some notoriety.

With all that said, this doesn’t mean that I’ve liked every single version of Dracula - as a character or as a story - that I’ve seen. Even I know a few Draculas that I frankly just don’t like. And it’s worth knowing the mistakes that have been made when handling this character, as much as it is worth praising the achievements. So, today, in honor of World Dracula Day, we’re gonna take a look at some of the worst of the worst from Transylvania. These are, in my personal, humble, and EXTREMELY biased opinion, the Top 5 Worst Portrayals of Count Dracula.

5. Carlos Villarias, from “Spanish Dracula.”

What is “Spanish Dracula,” some of you may be wondering? Well, here’s the basics: in 1931, Universal wanted to release their screen adaptation of Dracula in both English AND in Spanish. This was still in the early days of sound, and as a result, dubbing was a concept that really hadn’t been fully figured out. Typically, the way American studios handled making foreign-language movies, as a result, was just doing a second version of the film with different actors, all speaking the language intended. Very, very few of these alternate language films exist, and I think many would agree that the Spanish version of Dracula is one of the most famous to survive. In English, of course, Dracula was played by the immortal Bela Lugosi…and for the Spanish cast? They got this guy: Carlos Villarias. Many critics feel the Spanish Dracula is actually better, on a technical level, than the Lugosi outing. Having seen both films, I can’t say I agree: SOME things ARE better in it, but other things…ehhhh, the English version has them beat by a mile. It’s biggest problem is the cast, and ESPECIALLY Villarias as Dracula. I know nothing about this actor beyond this movie; maybe he’s great in other things, maybe he was just miscast…I don’t know. All I DO know is that, even if you take Lugosi’s iconic interpretation out of the equation, this is an AWFUL Dracula. How bad is he? Imagine if “Dracula: Dead & Loving It” was actually trying to take itself seriously. THAT is the best way I can describe this performance. Villarias comes off as more comical than creepy, his exaggerated and often bizarre expressions seeming like a parody of something that hasn’t even gained the legacy it needs to BE parodied yet. We all love to mock Lugosi occasionally, but Villarias feels like self-mockery already in the works, and - through both his performance and some differences in the writing/direction - comes across as a clownish idiot rather than a superior monster or an elegant aristocrat. The Spanish Dracula has its ups and downs, but Villarias certainly proves that one bad element can bring down an otherwise decent product.

4. Peter Karrie, from Nosferatu the Vampire: The Musical.

I am aware of at least four musical theatre interpretations of Dracula. The most famous one is a stage show by Frank Wildhorn, which isn’t great, but does have some good songs and has been done quite a few times with great actors. Another was a concept album by the musical trio of Evans, Orton, and Lynn; that one featured Michael McCarthy as the Count, and was never actually staged. Like the Wildhorn show, it’s not really that great, but it has a few good songs and performers. There’s also a musical comedy version, which I haven’t actually looked at, but I’ve heard is pretty good…and then there’s this show. Ostensibly, “Nosferatu the Vampire: The Musical” is a musical adaptation of the classic silent film “Nosferatu,” which is widely considered the first true Dracula movie ever made, and is certainly the oldest surviving adaptation. HOWEVER, that’s not really the case: the show is really sort of a blend of Nosferatu, the Bram Stoker novel, and some original material, all rolled into one…and it is ABYSMAL. I was SHOCKED to learn that this show has been staged more than once, and that the original cast recording actually featured some pretty big names in musical theatre. The most notable is poor Peter Karrie, one of the greatest performers of another Gothic legend, the Phantom of the Opera. I’ll give Karrie credit, his voice is beautiful (he’s played the Angel of Music, it kind of has to be), but not even his golden pipes can save this train wreck. The plot is terrible, the characters are bland, the morals are confusing, and there’s WAY too much focus on the sexual angles of the story in this for my comfort. (The sensuality of the vampire IS a topic that is present in the book, mind you, and far from something new...but you have to be VERY careful how you touch it. Trust me.) Worst of all, the music - very frankly - just isn’t that good. The lyrics are vapid and rambling, the orchestration and rhythms feel very “samey” throughout…it’s just DULL. With the other musicals, I can at least give them credit for a few catchy numbers, but this one? I can’t really remember much of anything these characters say or sing, I just remember the boredom and nonsense of the whole clumsy heap. As a result, Karrie’s shot at playing the Count is essentially the opposite of our previous pick: sometimes not even having a great performer can save terrible material, and this is a good example of that.

3. The Version from “Dracula: Sovereign of the Damned.”

I’ll confess that I hesitated to include this Dracula on the list - as well as another one later on - because he’s actually based on Marvel’s Dracula, specifically. Marvel’s Dracula - in other things - has been good. However, after some minor debate, I felt that both of the aforementioned versions simply HAD to be addressed, since - ties to Marvel or not - they are abominable interpretations. Released in some countries under the title “The Tomb of Dracula” (taken from the comic series it is purportedly based on), “Sovereign of the Damned” was an anime movie made by Toei, released in the early 80s. In the original Japanese version, the Count is voiced by Kenji Utsumi; in English, he’s dubbed - VERY badly - by Tom Wyner. If you’re wondering if the dubbing is in any way a contributing factor to this film’s terribleness…don’t worry: this movie is ATROCIOUS no matter what language the characters speak. (Believe me, I know.) The film unwisely attempts to adapt an entire many-issue comic series into a single hour-and-a-half-long story, which works about as well as you’d expect. The plot is like the Grinch’s soul: “an appalling dump heap, overflowing with the most disgraceful assortment of deplorable rubbish imaginable, mangled up in tangled up knots.” Character development goes entirely out the window, and Dracula himself arguably suffers the worst for this. The Count comes across as a total klutz in the film: the movie attempts to make him a sympathetic anti-hero, but the story is such a shambles you never really get to know him well enough to root for him, and he spends most of the movie either running away from danger or being foiled at every turn, with little indication of how truly powerful he really is. He comes across as an idiot much of the time, and isn’t even present for a big chunk of the film to begin with! With a title like “Sovereign of the Damned,” I can safely say I expected more.

2. All of the Actors from Legend of the Seven Golden Vampires.

This is probably one of the weirdest Dracula movies I’ve ever seen, as well as one of the worst. “Legend of the Seven Golden Vampires” was an out-of-continuity entry in the popular Hammer Dracula series, which famously starred Christopher Lee as the Count. At the time “Seven Golden Vampires” came out, however, Lee had left the role, feeling deeply disappointed by the previous and “official” final film in the series, “The Satanic Rites of Dracula.” Hammer studios, meanwhile, was teetering on the brink of collapse, and was really struggling for creative ideas. The result of these combined problems led to this colossal, mad junkyard of a movie: a bizarre blend of Kung Fu action adventure and Gothic chiller. Now, this combination, on its own terms, I actually don’t think is a totally bad idea: if you look far enough, you’ll find good examples of how you can blend the styles of martial-arts-focused action and Gothic horror together. This, however, is not one of them, and part of the problem stems from how poorly Dracula, himself, is managed. Without Lee to handle the reins, Hammer called instead upon contract player John Forbes-Robertson to play the Count. However, Forbes-Robertson doesn’t even GET to play Dracula for most of the film: he only appears at the beginning and in the climactic final battle between himself and Van Helsing. For most of the movie, Dracula’s spirit has possessed the body of a Chinese criminal known as Kah, played by Chan Shen. Instead of getting Forbes-Robertson to do the voice, Kah’s “Dracula Voice” is provided instead by dubbing actor David de Keyser. All three of these actors…are terrible. Forbes-Robertson is a stiff and somewhat silly Dracula when he is onscreen, and is defeated in a highly anticlimactic way in the end. Chan Shen as Kah comes across as a caricature more than a true "character," and his bodily performance feels like a strange blend of kabuki and English pantomime. Meanwhile, Keyser’s very badly-dubbed performance is wooden and stilted. When it takes three men to replace just one, and NONE of them do the job even remotely well? It feels like a true disgrace not only to the character, but also to the one who played him before. I’ll give all three of them this, they at least help to show what made Lee’s Dracula so singlehandedly spectacular.

1. Dominic Purcell, from Blade: Trinity.

This is the other Marvel Dracula on the list I mentioned a while ago. All of my entries up till now have been very long-winded, I know…but my reasons for naming poor Dominic Purcell from the abominable shambles that is “Blade: Trinity” as my pick for the absolute worst Dracula I’ve ever seen is much easier to explain. That reason can be summed up in the following phrase: this is not Dracula. This simply isn’t. I get what the movie was attempting to do - trying to focus on Dracula as this ancient, demonic warrior figure rather than “the Count,” so to speak. However, as various other versions have shown, there are ways you can focus on the “aggressive” aspects of Dracula AND STILL MAKE HIM FEEL LIKE DRACULA. Purcell is simply miscast and misdirected: he doesn’t look like a duck, he doesn’t quack like a duck, he doesn’t waddle like a duck, and therefore it’s fair to say he ain’t Duckula. I’m sure he’s trying his best, but - and it's a shame to say these words - his best just isn’t good enough. For that reason, above all else, he takes the number one spot on this list. There is literally no worse sin I can think of than looking at someone playing such a character and having nothing else to say but, “you, sir, are no Dracula.” 

(DIS)HONORABLE MENTIONS INCLUDE…

Leslie Nielsen, from Dracula: Dead and Loving It.

I know lots of people actually like this movie, but I personally do not. I just don’t think it’s very funny, for the most part, and even as far as spoofs go, I feel Leslie Nielsen is a weird choice for the character. It isn’t completely terrible, however - there’s a few jokes that make me laugh strewn throughout, and I like Peter MacNicol as Renfield - so it gets a pass from the top five.

Lon Chaney, Jr. from Son of Dracula.

It’s left somewhat ambiguous if the character in this film, “Count Alucard,” is indeed the Son of Dracula, or Dracula himself. This, for the record, is why things like “Hellsing” and “Castlevania” have used the name Alucard for both purposes: this is the movie that came up with that alias. While the invention of the name is noteworthy, the film itself is flawed. Chaney - God bless him - is woefully miscast. Whether he’s Dracula OR his Son, I think he did much better in his other Universal Monster roles.

Udo Kier, from Andy Warhol’s Dracula AND Langley Kirkwood, from Dracula 3000.

In both of these cases, I haven't even FINISHED these movies because they're just so freaking terrible. I've only seen parts of them, never the full thing through. I didn't feel it was fair to give them actual placement on the ranks as a result, but they're definitely worth noting for their own dreadfulness levels. In Udo Kier's case, I'd much rather watch him riding on the back of a T. Rex...bravo, if you got that reference.

[some-pers0n]

ooh unpopular opinion time!

Mindreaders shouldn't have been able to mindread just dragons and scavs. It either should've been dragons only or most animals being able to be mindread by more powerful mindreaders. Seems pretty silly to have scavengers be the one exception, when, like, a lot of animals do still have emotions that can be mindread; they just don't have the same complexity as humans for the most part.

Turtle comes off as far more transfem than transmasc imo. Transfem Turtle is an under-appreciated headcanon in the fandom.

Deathbringer literally treats Glory the same way Undauntable treats Wren. It's just seen as cute and romantic with Deathbringer because Glory likes him back.

Darkstalker is a sympathetic villain and that doesn't make him morally grey in the slightest. You can sympathize with a villain while still acknowledging that they're pretty much pure evil.

Oh, on a related note, AUs where Peacemaker discovers he's Darkstalker aren't actually overrated. There's just a small minority of fans who like to say that it goes against the message of the book, when these AUs are often purposefully about pointing out the flawed messaging. And I have trouble believing Foeslayer would be a good mom to any of her dragonets, especially to the dragonet enchanted to be her "do-over" from the guy who killed her husband.

Luna's tapestry thing never really bothered me. What upset me was seeing the giant jump in character from being extremely ready and willing to fight to essentially being made into a pacifist because they needed to keep to the stereotypes.

Freedom was a bad choice of character plot-wise, but a lot of the people critiquing her just seemed to be picking on that she wasn't the perfect ever apologetic abuse survivor. Of course she's going along with what her abuser says, who's literally trapped her in his mind as a hatchling forever. At the same time, her pretty much suicide wasn't very impactful because... well, we never got time to get attached to her. She was just thrown in at the end to be a big emotional moment, and that's not really how character deaths work.

Yeah I agree with the mindreader bit. I'd love to see more unique and interesting bits with that.

I do love any sort of trans Turtle headcanons. Maybe I'm stupid but I just look at him and go: "he has no gender" and becomes just like me fr. Trans fem Turtle is so cool though,, oh you can do so much with that.

Imma be blunt and say I do like Undauntable and Wren's sort of dynamic, but as platonic. Same goes for Glorybringer. Take out the flirting and replace it with playful banter and make it platonic and you're golden. Glorybringer in its current state? Ehhhh....no thank you...

Precisely that. I love me my villains and objectively terrible characters who I WILL make relatable and hold traits the readers can identity with. Does that make them even remotely morally grey? No! It just means they have more complexity and depth than a piece of paper.

I refuse to believe Foeslayer, or Hope now, could go back to a somewhat normal life with Peacemaker. I've been itching to write a oneshot about that for a while. Also, good stuff with the other things. I just woke up and can't formulate thoughts as well lmao.

The tapestry thing bothers me a little cause it seems like Luna constantly harks back to it at the worst and most distracting bits. Not that much though. I just think it's funny to point at how much she mentions it. But, yeah, her character was pretty rushed.

On the topic of rushed characters...oh my god Freedom....you could've been so much better... But, yeah. People critique her and make her out like she's bad because she's not a perfect abuse victim who's always good. She's not that great of a character cause she doesn't have a natural and smooth arc of becoming redeemed and good. It just kinda suddenly happens. Also just because something made you cry doesn't automatically mean it's good.

[beevean]

Netflix’s Castlevania gets a lot of flak around this blog, but let’s give a little credit where it’s due. Here’s 5 good parts.

1. Trevor, Sypha and Alucard vs. the vampire generals

Pretty easy one to mention: a stellar action scene that gets creative with the trio’s toolsets. It’d be a great game sequence, and the arrangement of Bloody Tears is the cherry on the icing on the cake.

2. Dracula never swears

Okay, if he ever did swear, it was probably something really light, but in a show where everyone is a Sir or Lady Swears-a-Lot to some extent, even DEATH, Drac had the most unique vocabulary.

3. They got “Saint Germain” right

Clearly, for what it’s worth, the show writers did their research on the name’s origin and pronunciation, whereas Konami’s localization team in 2005 seemed to just go off of how it was spelled.

4. A point on both sides

Obviously you want Trevor and the other heroes to win so humanity can have another chance for betterment (and the later Belmont protagonists can exist in this universe), but with how dickheaded and peabrained the majority of humanity is characterized through the whole show, you can’t blame Dracula or Isaac-in-Name-Only for wanting to wipe the slate clean (as misanthropic and needlessly extreme as they got). It’s an interesting deconstruction of classic good vs. evil and the general franchise premise, to say the least.

5. Beer is “better than sex”

Funniest gag between Trevor and Sypha, and the funniest post-Season 2.

Call this grasping at straws, but these were fun to mention.

Reply: I actually already made a list of the things I liked about NFCV :)

Mhh. I mostly agree with your points - yes S2E7 is the best episode in the show for the fight scenes, and Dracula really never swears btw, he might be the only major character to refrain from it. But point 4 is ehhhh. It feels too forcedly edgy for me to see it as the nuanced take the show wanted to convey. I don’t care if the guards are mean to Isaac when he wants through: they are still in the right to not want a dark wizard with demons in tow in the city. I don’t care if the villagers somehow didn’t believe Dracula when he threatened to kill them in one year: it doesn’t mean they deserved to be dismembered for the crime of not stopping a tyrannical bishop from killing a woman. And while I’m at it, I don’t feel Alucard is justified in insulting the Belmont clan because he saw the skull of a child vampire which I’m meant to take as “oh no look at them they’re so evil for killing kids :<”, when logically, a child vampire deserves to be taken out of their misery. Berserk did the Crapsack World better, like many edgy ideas from NFCV.

(also about #3 yeah CoD is also the game where Wallachia is pronounced with a SH sound. which, by the way, still trips me out. a little oof there lmao)

[kazumahashimoto]

my alien series review upon first watch within a few days

alien: the blueprint. not really my type of film but the impact it had is undeniable. i do think the themes of sexual perversion are the strongest in this one, and it's better for it! the practical effects still hold up for the most part too. i'd go so far as to say they're timeless honestly. a good watch!

aliens: oh my god it's just american military propaganda. like holt shit dude. it is JUST propaganda. the addition of the xenomorph queen was interesting for sure but oh my god. how do so many people view this as being the holy grail of alien films. i'm not gonna get in on the genre shift cos quite frankly i don't know or care enough to analyze that aspect but by the gods. it is just military propaganda. EYEROLL.

alien³: does not deserve the hate it gets! absolutely liked this more than aliens. i don't mind that the girl and the dude die. "we just got so emotionally invested in them :(" girl the very first movie established ripley as the lone survivor. it kinda makes sense it went like this honestly. my one complaint here regarding that though IS definitely the inexplicable egg that Just So Happens to be in the escape ship. like i already roll my eyes at the fact that the queen even Made It to the ship in aliens but now i'm supposed to suspend my disbelief enough to imagine she also snuck an egg somewhere in there. ehhhh..... and also like the facehuggers are established to only open up when there's a host immediately in front of them. so how'd it open up before the cryotubes were popped and someone got out. the explanation is lame, but the movie as a whole is pretty solid i'd say. killing off ripley makes fucking sense lol like ripley's thing from the beginning has been trying to protect people from the xenomorph. and she's got the queen in her. time to fucking bounce!!!! good film. the cgi is kinda ass but it was the 90s. what would it be without kinda shitty cgi.

alien resurrection: HONESTLY? HONESTLY. MY FAVORITE. listen i rolled my eyes when i read the synopsis saying they cloned ripley but i actually don't mind how they ended up doing it! though some (one in particular) of the ripley clones leaned far far too heavily into just being ableism, i do think ripley 8 seeing everything was a really powerful scene. gets kinda undermined by the immediate misogyny but that's kinda par for the course here. you're gonna see this again moving forward but i do love when the xenomorphs are given a level of sympathy. i'm just too endeared to the creature. and we get multiple levels of that in this one! first and foremost of course with ripley 8 being spliced with the alien, we see her relationship to her humanity come into question in super interesting ways. the way it goes hand in hand with call's relationship was great too. THIS MOVIE WAS SO UNEXPECTEDLY GAY 😭 I WAS SO THRILLED. the two men at the end fucking kissed on the mouth!!!!!! now i'm not saying there was a lick of those two being gay with each other before that moment but i love watching men kiss so. a good time for me.

NOW MY FAVORITE SCENES. obv the one scientist kissing the glass i mean. i hadn't felt truly spoken to by these films until that moment. it was cuuuuteeessss the way they were following each other's movements. awa. sosweets. *ignores what happens next* AND THEN. DEAR GOD. the newborn's birth from the xenomorph queen. i fucking love the newborn. like it's a different type of cute from the xenomorphs proper but it is socutes all the same. like i feel so gotten by my human brain chemicals registering this beast as having big ol eyes and therefore being cute and endearing but well. it fucking is. it IS a beautiful butterfly. i looooooove i fucking loooooooooooove it immediately turning on the xenomorph queen and instead viewing ripley 8 as its mother. i adore that mix of humanity vs The Killar instinct of the xenomorph. both scenes of it cudding and nuzzling ripley 8 fuck me uuuuuuup like oouuyyyuhhyygh :( baby 😭😭😭 genuinely the most heartbreaking kill of the franchise is the newborn. what a slow and painful death!!!! and i love that ripley 8 felt bad like that was her baby!!!! brief as it was you could feel the love there!!!! but ultimately she still had to kill it, for the sake of humanity. absolutely loved it. so so so fucking good.

alien vs predator: i got like 20 minutes into the first one and dipped cos i did not fucking care so bad. not for me.

prometheus: i hated this one to be honest. like ultimately this might just be a skill issue of "i don't get it" but. i also just do not care 😭 i don't think it really succeeds at trying to answer any questions, i think the use of holograms was fucking boring and lazy, the plotholes were kind of hard to ignore, and, and i know this was kind of the point, but no alien! poisonally i am here for that freak so for me i was bored senseless. i'm also just sooooo fucking confused about charlie coming back after getting burnt alive 😭 and for that matter, the neomorph making it out of the burning ship? like one of the first things they establish about the xenomorph in the first movie was "most animals don't like fire" and consistently they have been killing xenomorphs with fire. so. what fucking gives. but whaaaatever. overall i just don't get it and i don't even caaaaaaaare about the fucking space jockey and his band of freaks. AND ANYWAY. WE DON'T LEARN SHIT. WHICH I GUESS IS THE POINT BUT 😭😭😭😭 whatever. best moment was david saying "don't all people want their parents dead?" like so fucking true bitch.

alien covenant: now i quite liked this one actually!! if resurrection is my no.1 this has gotta be my no.2. i think the theme of creation is handled much better here, and to be fucking honest i don't even care that it creates a plothole in prometheus, i fucking LOVE that david created the xenomorphs. that fucking bangs. once again people complained that shaw gets killed off screen after we got invested in her, but gang! this is the fucking alien franchise! the bitches are gonna die! do not get so attached babe now is not the time! the critique i will actually take there though is the killing of the female lead in order to focus more on the male lead, but character wise it does make sense. now, as far as the new humans go, errmmm most of them are dumb as dirt and i truly feel no sympathy for like any of them 😭 not for being dumb necessarily, that's just how these things go, but for the themes of colonialism. it is kinda ironic (and maybe intentional?) that the humans are always like guhh we can't let the aliens spread to more planets! and then they just keep colonizing planet after planet after planet until they run out of habitable zones like mm. curious! but anyway. as kinda dumb as the new form of impregnation is, i still love what the movie did with the xenomorphs themselves!

the scene of david trying to get the one neomorph to trust him was sooooo fucking goooooood and the pain on his face and in his scream when the captain shoots it fuuuuuuuuuck it was honestly a bit reminiscent of ripley 8 with the newborn. absolutely loved. AND FUCK. OH MY GOD. when the captain threatens him to tell him what's going on and he's just like 👍 you got it follow me ^_^ and leads him to a room full of eggs. THE CUNT. I WAS LOSING IT. DIABOLICAL. ABSOLUTELY OBSESSED. and then he kept throwing fucking rocks at his head until he woke back up 😭😭 the cunt. jesus christ. godlike. "what do you believe in?" "creation." SHIT RULES. i loved it. AND THE BABY XENOMORPH COMING OUT AND COPYING DAVID'S MOVEMENTSSSSSSSS I LOVE IT. SOCUTES. the way the music swelled and was so sweet like ugh. good fucking scene. also the shit with walter and david was fucking crazyyyyyy. the flute scene. AND THEY KISSED?!?!??! it's too dubious i feel for me to go completely nuts over but it was certainly a moment. i think the walter david switcharoo came from a mile away but i'm still into it. the absolute cunt. god i love it. THIS takes the violent act of creation and succeeds.

alien romulus: as expected of a disney product. YOOOO REFERENCE?! HEY REMEMBER WHEN WE DID THAT? GET AWAY FROM HER YOU BITCH! HAHA! REMEMBER? DO YOU REMEMBER? PLEASE TELL ME YOU REMEMBER :( what a fucking waste if a movie 😭 i cannot think of a less interesting place in the timeline to try and shove yourself into. who fucking asked 😭😭😭😭 like the movie looked nice as per usual but oh my god. talk about a low budget flight. what was the point. what did this add. like. man and people wanna say the NEWBORN was an ugly monster design LOOK AT THE FUCKING OFFSPRING 😭😭😭 absolute flop. did not care for this beast. NOT CUTE. the best moment was the fucking ribcage pussioure pissing acid all over that annoying brit. and the scene was not even that good he just annoyed me. overall that shit sucked and i have absolutely no idea why they decided they just HAD to flesh out the time in between 2 and 3 more. ANY ASKERS?

moral of the story: play stupid games win stupid prizes. and don't be british

[plasma-studios]

oh right new fluffy filler errorink oneshot

enemies, definitely (ao3)

The concept of enemy is simple. People are not. Gods, especially, are not. There are many gods out there who are intimately familiar with the concept of enemy. Take Dream and Nightmare, for instance. Their conflict is simple; the battle between good and evil. More or less. An altruistic one versus a malicious one. It’s simple to understand.

However, and I say this with no ill will, some Gods out there defy this. Some gods too are grossly familiar with the meaning of enemy , and somehow defy it just by existing. I wish I could say it was fueled by something easier to write, perhaps love, the type of love that’s a light tickling kiss and easily described, but no. They just had to share a type of love that’s nearly indescribable. Though I must try.  

To this day, the God of Destruction claims he will never love the Protector, with a scowl too if you catch him in the mood. The God of Creation, a.k.a. the Protector, will laugh, and— this is the infuriating part— wink . What he comments always changes, and last time it went like this: oh, I agree. What we share cannot be called just love. Then the Destroyer flicked his cheek with a string, and he laughed further, as if I could not see the yellow blush of the taller. Ah, yes, the height difference ( don’t rub it in, he warns everytime it is brought up. oh, the way he gets flustered gives the Destroyer life, I am certain; though every time it happens it edges me steadily closer to a quicker end).

“You done, Creators?” Ink’s words spilt like him, elegant and light, though tinted with his trademark hue of colouring laughter. “Wow, colouring laughter? Error, do I really laugh like that?”

“Go ask someone with synesthesia.” Error was fooling nobody, on the tip of his tonue lay the answer: yes, and I love you for it. “Oi, don’t put words into my mouth. I don’t even have a tongue.”

“You could, though。 Ecto, right?” 

Error’s face scrunched up. “Why on earth would I summon my ecto-tongue?”

“Ehhhh.” Ink shrugged. “Don’t look at me, look at the Creators. They said it first.” He rocked back and forth on the balls of his feet, and Error watched him from the corner of his eye. Ah, young love. 

“ Young ?” Error said incredulously. “I’m older than Nightmare.” It wasn’t a good comparison, though, considering Nightmare was not even a millennia old. 

“Don’t age-shame him, Creators,” Ink chided. Error snorted, strangely unfazed by the Protector defending him, and also strangely unfazed by the slightest note of passive aggression in the narrating Creator’s face. 

“Key word, narrating. Do your job and stop interrupting.” us, went the unspoken word. 

“That would be wonderful, yes.” Alas, even the Protector didn’t protect the Creator. What a shame.

Error gave off the air of a man about to start whistling. “I see where you got the dramatics from.”

Ink laughed, a noise as clear as shimmering lakes in summer. “Oh, summer! I love summer. Remember that time we visited that lake? Which AU was that again…?”

“I love how you assume my memory is any better than yours.”

“Just being polite,” Ink replied rather tartily, with a tiny cheeky grin either of them missed. 

-------

“Hey, glitch.” Ink unceremoniously dumped himself onto a corner of the beanbag. 

Error didn’t turn from the code window following the latest update in Undernovela. “Hello, anomaly that does not live here. Or belong here. Or have any right to be here.” 

“You could start with a hello. ”

“Hello. Go away.” A single string flicked Ink’s cheek, and he snorted, “Tame, from you.”

Error’s glitches buzzed. “Nicest thing you’ve ever said to me.”

Ink jerked back, mouth agape. “How dare you, I’m the nicest person you know.”

“I know Dream.” “I’ve been wounded . How could you?” Ink grasped at his chest. “ Betrayal . Absolute betrayal.”

“Yeah, yeah.” Error continued watching his Undernovela in the silence waiting for Ink to speak . Ink didn’t say anything, and if Error didn’t know him as well as he did he’d think Ink was interested in Undernovela.

“Oi,” Error finally spoke. “You keep shifting and fidgeting. What’s wrong?

Ink blinked a full blink. “Uh. I may or may not need a favour?”

“What’s in it for me?”

“...My eternal affection?”

Error shook his head. “Already have it, inkblot. Don’t want it anyway, by the way.”

“How about I pitch the idea for a ChocoTale? Or ChocolateTale? Eh, I’ll work the name out, but I’ll pitch it to the Creators. Com’on, please?”

“Ugh. Fine. What is it?”

Error was prepared for many things. 

He was not prepared for Ink to pull off his brown scarf, tugging it around… ah. There was a hole right in the corner, fraying at the seams. It was somehow discoloured too, almost desaturated. 

“What happened?” Error ran a finger along the affected portion. “ How did it happen?”

“Well, I found a new command I could run in AUs, and I was excited, right? So i went to Dream and he went you’re not testing that on the AUs. I mean, rude—”

“You were going to, weren’t you?”

“Not important. So, naturally, I had to, if just out of spite, but I didn’t realise it was only effective in Positive AUs, so when I tried it in some Netrual one, it came back around like a boomerang and hit me. Or my scarf. Rude.”

“That’s… so incredibly in-character for you.” 

“I know, you’re probably swooning.”

“Sure.” Error, to his dismay, was, for the idiot. “So, what do you want me to do?”

“Help me fix my scarf?”

“Ah.”

They sat in silence for a moment. 

“So… are you going to help?”

Error clicked his tongue.

“Get me thread this specific shade of brown. And a needle, I keep losing my few in the Anti-void.”

“Then can I watch you sew?”

Error blinked. “Uh.”

“It’s just— you always look so focused and pleased when you sew and it’s really sweet! If you’re comfy with it, of course.”

Error absentmindedly tugged at his scarf; blue fabric over yellowing skull=bone.

“Fuck off, inkblot.” “Can I stay, after?”

Error was very, very interested in his Undernovela now. “Needle, thread. Now.”

Ink laughed his colouring laughter, and Error couldn’t help but look back for just a moment. There, with his star eyelights, Ink looked at Error as if— as if he was everything there was in the world. He looked at Error as if he was worthy of being loved.

“Because he is. Because you are , Error.” 

And Error looked at Ink not as if he was everything there was in the world, but only because he had learnt the world was crueler the more complex it became with its details. So Error looked at Ink as if, perhaps, he could teach himself to love, if only for Ink who deserved it so.

“Don’t listen to them. You owe me nothing.”

Error didn’t reply at first. Then,

“You think I love you because I owe you it? No, inkblot.” He caught the question mark before it dissapated into another shape in his eyesockets. “I love you because I love you.”

Ink blinked. 

Then, ever so subtly, his tiny grin returned.

“Oh. You do love me.”

Error exhaled softly. 

“Needle. Thread. You owe me one.”

Later, when Ink arrived with the needle and thread, as he passed it to Error’s strings, he suddenly folded his fingers into a fist. Error paused, confused, and just then— 

Ink kissed his bundled strings.

And Error, well, perhaps it would’ve been easier for him if he crashed. Then he would not need to handle this… situation . But his glitches merely buzzed painlessly.

Error was silent, and as Ink’s grin teetered, as if he was unsure if he overstepped, the threads pulled him from behind. Ink let out a short oh!, having been caught off-guard. Then Error was on him, and the two melted into each other, a puddle of disheveled love, but still tasting sweeter in the present. 

Definitely enemies.

[fictionkinfessions]

Right. Soz. Long post incoming.

Actually you know what I've got another canon squicks thing I wanna talk about. It really really weirds me out when people try to find every possible reason to excuse my behaviour/make it out like I'm just misunderstood or something like that. Like I guess it's not technically wrong because technically I guess I am ""misunderstood"" but using that to try and make me out to be less of a horrible person just makes me kinda... ehhhh.

Like, I wasn't even that good of a father. Like, I see all this art and fic about me and my soft spot for Noodle and of course I loved her so much and I still do - that's my kid, y'know - she also wasn't really safe from my mood swings and general rudeness and difficulty to... be around. I mean, if El Manana is any indication. Sure I did eons better than my own dad but the bar wasn't set particularly high.

Also people who act like I'm not sexist in-source make me raise an eyebrow. I know in Phase 4 I said that "treat objects like women, not women like objects" thing but I feel like it flew over a LOT of people's heads that that's kind of just... still thinly veiled sexism... I don't know, it's a little ironic in a way because when I see people give into the crazy shit I put out like "I'm a feminist now! (Gravely objectifying statement about women)" and react like "he's really a feminist now! character development!" it's just... no, you're just... falling for my lies again.

The same applies when people think I'm misunderstood or whatever. I am evil. I am a terrible person at least in-source. A criminal. An abuser. Blah blah blah. Thinking it's a front and that I've got some softness underneath is honestly just falling for my manipulation again but I mean, I guess it isn't technically WRONG, because there are people I could be less crazy around and things I genuinely had sensitivities to... I don't know, I feel like people just jump the gun and want to make me a good guy or at least like "chaotic neutral" because it's safer than acknowledging my monstrousness.

Whatever. Had to let that out sometime. Niccals out, cheers, hydrate or diedrate. #⛓️🥃

x

[aprillikesthings]

ugh my wired headphones are still hurting my head >:(

anyway

s3 ep2 huntara

ahahah I love this one

(if you're new here: i'm rewatching She-Ra for fic-writing purposes, and live-blogging my way through them making commentary and jokes and side notes about random shit. bc this is a REwatch there are many references to later plot points)

is that the Beta Kindergarten

(man I've been making a lot of Steven Universe references in these lately, but yeah I can't look at sandstone slot canyons without thinking "hrr hrr where's Jasper")

(wait has a Jasper cosplayer actually taken photos in one of these in like Utah? a quick image search says no. damn.)

how many times did I look at this establishing shot before I realized this part of the Fright Zone is the ruins of a ginormous spaceship

ALSO "day 135"? I noted yesterday that someone working on the show said sOMEWHERE that each season is about a year and I was like "ehhhh" but I guess that's not far off.

That makes the whole catradora arc even more angsty tbh. For some reason I thought the whole show took place over like a single year or so. But FOUR OR FIVE YEARS?? they pined for each other while trying to murder each other for MULTIPLE YEARS????

awwwwww

Listen. I love this ship. I'm always weak for "complete asshole with tough act is soft for one (1) person"

(tho lemme tell you. do not actually date those dudes irl. *sigh*)

why did so many 80's cartoons have extremely unrealistic quicksand scenes tho

gdi adora

The Crimson Waste is actually just a western bar full of furries. But seriously designing the characters in the bar must've been hella fun

AAHAHAAHH Adora being so, so blatantly gay for Huntara is one of my fave things

Did they need to establish that Adora is into women? Pfft, no. Did they still decide to show us Adora being absolutely smitten on sight for an older, big, buff, badass, butchy lady? YES.

Doesn't hurt that she looks likes this lol

like it's the least subtle thing on EARTH i love it so much

oh no now I want to look up fics

18 of them are explicit. well. I'm just gonna. leave that tab open.

ADORA. YOU COCKBLOCKED HER. RUDE.

lol there's a moment where Glimmer and Bow are like "ha ha we need to talk amongst ourselves" and turns around and Adora is still just staring at Huntara with googly eyes without noticing what Bow even said and lemme tell you, I've been that fucking obvious and oblivious

Huntara literally is like "oh my god you kids are gonna end up DEAD without me. FINE." Meanwhile, Adora:

Plot plot Huntara leads them to a trap and they get hit with tranquilizer darts and dropped into a pit.

that's just a nice shot tbh

EAT SOME DAMN SOUP your girlfriend spent TIME on that

she just refuses to be afraid of him

Anyway yeah this is when we find out he's just a clone of Horde Prime the Big Baddy of the series, Hordak is a "defective" clone, he was sent to "the front lines" to die and fell through a portal into Etheria. "with nothing but a broken ship, I built an empire..." the whole point of the portal is to bring Horde Prime through, which means that's what he was doing when he tried before and ended up with A Magic Baby (Adora) instead.

The animation in the flashback is clearly inspired by Lotte Reiniger which is super cool??

Back to the Crimson Waste, they've gotten themselves out of the hole, and Adora's upset because the whole point of this mission is her getting more info about Mara with the hopes of understanding her own past better

she's RIGHT

"...at least to me..."

LISTEN TO YOUR CUTE NERDY GIRLFRIEND YOU EMO BASTARD

She makes him a nice techy exoskeleton armor thingie

that's a start but c'mon I know you can do better than that

lolol the recorder baby critter KICKS HIM in an obvious "dude really????"

look at him!!! AAHAHAH

i'm gonna go over the image limit and tumblr's gonna cut me off and make me reblog this any minute now but this episode is jUST TOO GOOD

"I like being friends with you, too" ;_;

Huntara's "friends" make fun of her for being a softie while she swings the She-Ra sword around and then Glimmer drops in wooo

yeah I know this is a fight scene but eheheheh

and then they banged

okay they kept fighting but like, c'mon

the "sword point under the chin" thing is just so good and I loved the way they did the angles here

OH SHIT I forgot Huntara had heard of She-Ra

OH HO HO HOW THE TURN TABLES

Anyway Huntara does her little speech about how she also used to be a Horde soldier but left because Hordak was such a dick to his soldiers. "you would know, you were one of us."

called THE FUCK OUT

Huntara does her little "you can't defeat the Horde alone even if you're She-Ra" and she responds with "yah I'm not alone tho"

but also that shot is unnecessarily hot

....i've hit the image limit with two minutes to spare so I went back and deleted one because

hggghh

(not gonna get into how Shadow Weaver's face-touching thing is what made Adora do it here but yeah)

Huntara tells her minions to get lost, admits that the war scared the shit out of her and that's why she ran, but she knows that's bullshit and she promises to help Adora stop the war :D and then leads them to the place they were originally looking for: the ruins of Mara's ship!

AND EPISODE OVER

(gonna...see if any of those fics are any good 👀)

[izthepup]

Thor Catchup

WARNING, THERE ARE SPOILERS.

———If you were a Valkyrie———

- Tbh?

- He'd probably let you train Thrúd behind Sif's back

- He won't ask too much for you to take off your helmet / mask..

- That's because 

- 1) He respects you

- 2) ...if he really wants you to take off your mask, he would just pull it off

- But when he pulls it off, it's mainly when you two are alone

- He doesn't want to make you unhappy

- He'd be even angrier at Kratos when he learns that he killed the other Valkyries 

- He didn't actually really know them, it was only because you cared about them (maybe)

- He might go on a fly with you

- Probably not though

- "A fly? Really? As if you're strong enough. Besides, a fly? Sounds silly."

- When he does, he just goes along with his hammer.

- He doesn't care too much that your wings are soft

- When he does, it's only when he is tired 

- He'll probably force you into a nap with him

- Mainly cause your wings are soft like a blanket

———Your Best Friend + Friends———

- Uhhhhh

- Maybe sif?

- She wouldn't appreciate the fact that he left her for you

- ...but  she was glad that he was with someone who made him truly happy

- Most of the time it's just conversations

- Thrúd might be a friend too

- She would be glad that he found someone to make him happy

- Also the fact that you got him to stop drinking

- well drinking as much

- he rarely drinks now, only when he gets upset by the all-father

- Atreus might be ehhhh

- He's a funny and good kid and all

- But he also did murder Thor's son and half brother 

- He'll mainly try to not make you mad

- If he got on Thor's bad side, he might 'subtly' flatter you

- By 'subtly' I mean it's obvious how much he's trying to get off of Thor's bad side

- Heimdall isn't too good of a friend

- While yes, he's one of Thor's many half brothers (I think)

- ...he calls thor names behind his back, and doesn't really respect him

- But he might

- MIGHT

- And I mean if Heimdall is in a very good mood 

- He might give you something nice

- Sometimes he might pity you two for what Odin would do to you if he found out that Thor was close to you

- So Heimdall might not tell Odin

- almost definitely Odin

- ISNT

- a friend

- yep He's definitely not a friend

- Cause he was so cruel to Thor

- and he still is

- If he found out that you two were even closer than Thor was with Sif?

- He might make subtle threats about you whenever Thor displeases him

- Maybe even just knowing you are close he might make threats

- "Next time, do better. We don't want Y/N involved in this, do we? Finding out this mistake... the  hard  way?"

- Mainly just whoever was your previous friends

- Those would mainly be Thor's friends too

- he doesn't have to many Aesir friends because well

- he intimidates them, to say the very least

———How you cuddle + Hug———

- He doesn't care if you cuddle or hug in front of others

- In fact, he kind of prefers to do it in public sometimes

- he knows that it's like a wolf claiming his territory— it keeps all the others away

- or I guess it'll mainly keep others from wanting to hurt you

- But he doesn't like hugging or cuddling in front of Heimdall or Odin

- Heimdall would tell Odin

- Odin would probably do something to you to try to keep Thor somewhat unhappy

- But when you hug?

- there's quite a few ways

- but the main way?

- Him pulling you towards his chest, probably gently rubbing or caressing your head / face

- He'd wrap both arms around you

- it would be like a bear hug

- he likes feeling like he can protect you 

- which he can protect you, ofc

- or he might sweep you off of your feet

- him having one arm under your knees, one around your waist

- when you do this, you'll probably be hugging his neck

- you two also have many ways to cuddle

- one way is by him pulling you into his chest, wrapping his arms around you so you can't escape

- another way is by him pulling you (or you already sitting) onto something like a chair or a couch

- and then him resting his head on top of yours, his arms around you but not tight

- You might not be doing anything in this cuddle, just letting him put his arms on your back, another on one of your arms (or his hand on yours.)

- If you're laying down or sleeping, he'll probably be right next to your back, with an arm wrapped around you

- Although he seems all tough, he's really gentle with you

———Kisses———

- Basically?

- every single kiss you're fine with

- he's okay with Eskimo kisses, but he prefers normal kisses

- Sometimes hand kisses

- but mainly face kisses

- sometimes he'll kiss slow and passionate

- other times it'll just be Y'know

- normal speed kisses

———Do you wear each other's clothes?———

- I'm so sorry about this

- but

- Thor is probably too big for most of your clothes

- But if you have a cape or something?

- he might wear that 

- He'd be surprised if he saw you wearing his

- "Y/N, why are you wearing my clothes?"

- If it's one of his spare capes?

- sure, he'll let you keep it— or, at least wear it for a little while

- he thinks it's kind of funny, seeing how big the cape is on you

- but if it's one of his normal clothes?

- he'll probably ask for it back.

- "Y/N, can I have my clothes back?"

———If he heard you sing———

- He walked past (wherever you were singing, probably your room) and heard your voice

- He was curious so he looked in the room

- He quietly went into the room, and silently shut the door behind him 

- he wasn't sure if you wanted others to hear, but mainly he wanted to be the first to hear you sing

- He just stood there

- when you finished singing, he was smiling at you

- "Well, now you have to sing for me sometime."

———When he gets jealous———

- I don't know who in their right mind was flirting with you

- Probably an Einherjar at the bar (he took you for a drink once) or a dwarf in Svartlfheim (for a check up of sorts)

- But whoever it was? 

- they began flirting with you

- He saw and got very annoyed

- He would stand by you, small bolts of lightning coming off of him (like they did whenever he got angry)

- If it was an Einherjar?

- CRACK!

- ... he smashed their head

- He didn't really think when he was doing it

- but he did know Einherjar always came back 

- If it was a dwarf?

- He didn't smash their head 

- mainly cause that dwarf was probably helpful to whatever was being built 

- But he took a step closer to them

- intimidated the dwarf so much that the dwarf might have wet themselves if they didn't back away as soon as they did

- "Er.. uh, nice to meet you, I think I'm gonna go now!"

- The dwarf's voice was very high pitched— probably with fear

- "Thor, were you jealous?"

- He seemed annoyed still

- "If that's what you want to call it, then sure."

———If he walked in on you changing———

- He knew you were probably in your room

- He wanted to give something (maybe like a flower, or your favorite food from the kitchen)

- He didn't think to knock 

- As he always says, "Too much thinking!"

- so he doesn't think ahead sometimes.

- ANYWAYS

- "Y/N, I have something for-"

- He saw that you were changing

- "Oh, sorry."

- He kind of wanted to stay longer 

- WAIT THAT SOUNDS WRONG, I MEAN HE LIKES HOW YOUR BODY LOOKS-

- UHH ANYWAYS

- He left pretty quickly though, because he respected your privacy

- and closed the door ofc 

- when you come out, he does apologize 

- in a way

- "I suppose next time I should knock?"

- Alright so he didn't apologize, but he did apologize before

- He didn't show any embarrassment and wasn't embarrassed in the slightest.

———Everyday life / headcanons———

- He little to never apologizes to others

- He only apologizes to you sometimes, if needed

- Sometimes he doesn't think ahead

- at least, he doesn't like taking too much time to plan

- Although he's tough, and is rough to everyone?

- He's gentle to you.

- He would chuckle if you ever tried to pick up his hammer

- He probably has tried to get you a weapon like his 

- But he couldn't find anybody with enough skill

- Because Brok and Sindri, who made his hammer wasn't on his side

- Even though he never shows it?

- He's kinda touch starved 

- well, only for affectionate touch

- whenever he was touched before, it was because of a fight or something (mainly when Odin beat him)

- He drinks a lot less now that he has you

- He drank before because he was kind of stressed

- Now he only drinks when the all-father stresses him out

- sometimes Odin uses you as a threat against Thor, because of how much Thor cares about you

- If you get hurt? 

- it depends how badly.

- Kind of hurt?

- he'll check up on you.

- if it was because of someone, he'd probably do a "blood payment."

- if it was just an accident, he'd treat you like a mother might with a little kid.

- "Next time be more careful, alright?"

- But if you were badly hurt?

- If it was a person:

- CRACK

- was that a bone breaking or thunder?

- either way

- there would be an absolute ginormous thunder storm

- he would probably smash their head

- if he couldn't get them at that moment?

- he'll tell them that he'll be back to give them their "blood payment."

- he would carry you to a safe place

- surprisingly?

- he actually kind of knows what to do with wounds.

- he'll do what he can, then bring you to a healer

- then he'd go back to that person and probably kill them- or almost kill them.

- if it was an accident that you did by yourself?

- He'd quickly pick you up, tend to your wound to hold you over, then bring you to a healer who could actually help.

- he'd watch you a little more carefully too

———After his  death...———

- Neither of you knew brok too well

- he'd only know that this would probably help start Ragnarök from how Odin described it

- It only really affected you when Thor got stabbed by Odin

- (PLAYBACK.... REVIVING)

- Thor got badly hurt

- he almost died

- But when freya saw how sad you were

- and how worried you were?

- she actually helped

- she healed Thor enough to hold him over

- well, enough to keep him alive for a little while 

- she helped heal him

- Sindri had been annoyed when she healed him

- but Thor and Freya had gotten into a sort of mutual friendship

- not enemies, not friends

- Freya had known how it was to lose someone (or a lot), that's why she helped you

- also because Thor realized what Odin had done and sort of switched sides before being stabbed

———If you were sick———

- He had no idea what to do

- Thrúd, Magni, and Modi never got sick

- "How the f- am I supposed to know what to do?"

- He was a little worried until you told him that sickness couldn't kill you

- well some sicknesses couldn't kill

- You told him what you needed to get

- he did get you whatever you needed

- if you needed soup?

- well unfortunately he doesn't know how to make it

- so he gets the soup from the kitchens

- if you need medicine?

- well some Aesir aren't gods

- so they might get sick

- so that means that the healers might have medicine

- He'll probably force you to sleep

- when he does that, he'll probably fall asleep too

———During your period———

- I mean

- if goddesses had them?

- he'd probably know somewhat about them from Sif and Thrúd

- He'd get you whatever you need

- If goddesses didn't have them?

- he'd be confused

- "So you are constantly bleeding, but not dying?"

- You tell him what you need and he gets it

———Soulmate AU———

- Kind of surprisingly?

- He actually believed in soulmates!

- He had a soulmate before

- ofc, that soulmate was Sif

- their connection was probably something like their hearts glowed when they first met

- "Soulmates? But Sif was.."

- he was confused

- Your connection: probably something like when one is next to the other, they will be healing.

- Ex: If you had a bruise, Thor has a scratch and you guys sat by each other, the bruise and scratch would heal.

- It's actually helpful seeing how much he gets hurt-

———If you almost died———

- "Y/N! Hang on, I'll be right there!"

- He'd quickly killed whatever hurt you 

- if it was someone like Kratos who hurt you?

- Thor would probably yell at them, something about a blood payment

- "Y/N, no... c'mon, just hold on for a little longer. I'll get you to someone who can help."

- One of the few times he will show weakness; panic and fear

- you don't die:

- "Good job staying alive... I don't know if you even meant it, but thank you for staying for me."

- His eyes were a little puffy; he was probably rubbing his eyes to not cry

- one of the few times he actually almost cries- 

- to be fair, he almost lost one of the few people who makes him truly happy

- he was glad that you were alive, and made you stay in The Great Lodge for a while

- he might've been a little more affectionate to you for a little while after realizing how close he was to losing you

- when you do  go out, he'll probably watch you closely, or if he isn't there, someone he trusts to watch you

- if you died:

- "Y/N, no, no, no.. god, why did this happen?"

- he'd probably drink a lot more

- he'd be a lot more stoic

- the only people he wouldn't snap at:

- Sif, Thrúd, and maybe odin

- he would probably be a lot meaner to Atreus when they go on missions

- whenever someone asks him about you, his voice might crack a little as he says,

- "...(She/He/They) are gone now... I'd rather not talk about Y/N right now."

- and then he would just be quiet, maybe sound a little more angry

- Atreus would probably try a lot to make Thor feel better, even though Thor brushes him off

- that is, if you die before Ragnarök

———His reaction to a hybrid———

- there are plenty of Wyverns around Asgard 

- but one decided to come up to you two, probably curious 

- it looked odd though

- it looked like a Dodher Wyvern but bigger, much prettier, and with more & bigger horns

- it did bite Thor though 

- unfortunately, Thor was in kind of a bad mood

- so he just straight up, used his hammer and bonked the life out of the wyvern in one hit

- You looked at the corpse for a moment longer, thor barely cast it a glance

- "Thor, have you ever seen anything like this?"

- "No. Why does it matter though? It was just a wild animal, and now it's dead."

- he didn't seem to care too much

———Piggyback rides———

- I mean it depends

- if you really want to have a piggy back ride?

- yeah, he wants for you to be happy

- but if he's in a bad mood or you just kind of want a piggy back ride?

- probably not.

- Most of the time if you want to be carried or held?

- he'll probably either hold you bridal style, or maybe like a sack or potatoes if I'm being honest-

- sorry, he can't go on your shoulders

- even if he could, he wouldn't want to be held.

———Big spoon, little spoon———

- He's obviously a big spoon

- he likes being able to protect you

- and he likes it when you feel safe

- he doesn't care much for his own safety, so he's never the little spoon

———If you came back as an Einherjar———

- Thor wasn't drinking for once, so he was watching the Einherjar training

- Odin was watching too

- One of the Einherjar looked a lot like you, so he was watching it very closely

- Odin decided to speak up, knowing that Thor would be more focused on his missions if you were around

- "Interested in that one, aren't you? I thought you would like that one, as it's Y/N."

- he called you up, and next to Thor 

- Odin decided to be nice to Thor for once

- He let you stay with Thor, with all of your previous memory 

- BUT

- sometimes he uses you as a threat to Thor sometimes, still

- ANYWAYS

- "...Y/N? Is it really you?"

- His voice was so full of hope, it could have cracked odin's heart if it wasn't you

- "...Thor?"

- He was caressing your face, clearly trying not to show too much affection in fear of what Odin might do

- but once it was just you two, he probably brought you into a ginormous hug

———When you're drunk———

- tbh he's probably the reason why you are drunk

- he probably convinced you to drink it 

- he would keep you from drinking too much tho

- "Careful. You don't want to drink too much, you can disappoint others that way."

- he wouldn't really care if you drank some, but he would care if you drank a lot

- and by a lot, I mean several jugs a day

- but otherwise, he's fine

- he calls it "relaxing."

———Sleeping with each other———

- again the innocent version

- he was used to it immediately 

- he slept with Sif for a while so ofc he's used to it

- he definitely wraps his arms around you

- he likes cuddling

- imagine cuddling dogs

———When You're Jealous———

- He was talking to an Aesir probably

- the Aesir was being super friendly

- the Aesir and Thor were just chatting

- nobody really liked to have long conversations with Thor, so this was kind of rare

- but then he saw the look on your face and ended the conversation 

- "Y/N, are you okay?"

- it doesn't matter if you tell him or not, he'll probably figure it out

- "You were jealous? Don't worry Y/N, I'd never leave you."

- he sounded serious, but he gave a quiet chuckle right before saying 'you.'

- but he might have teased you later on

———If you were the child of a strong enemy———

- wait, would it still be an enemy for him since he is an enemy of Kratos?

- I dunno... you'll have to figure that out

- ANYWAYS

- it wouldn't make much of a difference 

- he still loved you the same

- he didn't really know what to do to help you once you two found out they were dead (if they are)

- he tried to comfort you though

———When he's drunk———

- Uhhh just play or watch the bar fight scene

- with some?

- he's really aggressive 

- but with you?

- he's more friendly

- he likes to cause bar fights

- but if it's just the two of you?

- he might just be like a cat who had too much cat nip

———When you have a nightmare———

- he knows almost exactly what to do

- he learned from Sif, after Thrúd had a nightmare when she was younger

- "Hey, hey... you're alright... want to tell me what's wrong?"

- he said it in a softer, deeper voice than normal

- if you told him it was about someone, he'd try to make you feel better

- "You want me to beat them up?"

- if you didn't want to tell him, he'd understand 

- "Do you need anything?"

- He would get whatever you needed

- if you stayed quiet, he would suddenly wrap his arms around you

- he would rock you gently back and forth, probably stroking your hair (or head)

Sorry I didn't really know how  to write Thor. I just see him as a protective mama bear, or papa bear in this sense. Like, tough on the outside, sweet on the inside. But idk

[girlvinland]

Ehhhh. This is just a vent about something not too serious rn but it annoyed me enough to want to write about it lol. And I’m sorry if this is perhaps comes off as a bit judgmental in some way.

I was watching one of Drama Kween’s videos yesterday about Gen Alpha and Millenial parents and I heavily agree with the message that you should not be putting your kid in front of an ipad and calling it a day and that you should be tending to their mental, emotional, and physical development, but omg one of the tiktoks she showed rubbed me the wrong way so badly. It was this person talking about how a mom brought her kid into the person’s workplace, and the kid started throwing business cards on the floor or something while the mom did nothing, but the person kept completely dehumanizing this child and calling them “it” and “satan spawn” and speaking with so much hatred about it and it just totally shut my brain down. I was honestly kind of stunned by it bc I thought we were moving past that a bit. Guess not?

Don’t get me wrong, I understand that kids are a lot and can be annoying/loud/overwhelming/etc. But whenever someone speaks about them like that, even out of frustration, it makes me feel like they have no empathy for the child at all and like everything is centered around their day and their inconveniences like they’re not talking about a child being a child and you know, acting like a child (and possibly one who is bored or under-stimulated in some way and therefore acting out). And in this case, the mom should have said something to the kid or redirected their attention or disciplined them somehow like. I agree! But man, hearing people use those terms or have this overall hatred and disdain for children and acting like it’s a good thing just. Idk. I think it says a lot about someone, esp if they’re willing to post it online and everything. It’s one thing to criticize a parent’s actions or behavior in a certain situation, but it’s another to act like a child is an animal or an object that’s just there to ruin your day and who isn’t a human with their own needs. It’s not the child’s fault that the parent isn’t parenting, you know? I’m not a parent, but I’ve had jobs where I was interacting with children for large portions of time, and I do understand the annoyance of it sometimes, but just. They’re still human too.

I think this is why I really dislike a lot of the overall vibes of the “childfree” community sometimes (not that this person in the tiktok was, but the language reminded me of it). It’s like, even if I’m not currently a parent (and for a while when I was younger wasn’t even sure if I wanted to be/felt more on that side of things), I truly have never understood what’s good about referring to children as “spawn” or parents as “breeders” and acting so high and mighty about not having/wanting children. It’s like once I hear someone refer to kids with dehumanizing terms, I kind of mentally shut off and am not really interested in hearing any more. It’s very possible to say “yeah I don’t like children or being around them” without being a complete asshole about it. I mean, we were all kids once. We probably annoyed the shit out of people at one point or another too. We were still humans who deserved respect, even if we were tired or cranky or annoying, and even with regards to discipline.

But yeah, idk. It kind of just got to me, and I feel like they could have gotten their point across in a much better way without putting their disdain on full blast or whatever. Even if someone has good points to make, it doesn’t exactly make them seem like any better of a person than the parent when that’s how they choose to talk about the child, at least imo. Again, I understand kids being annoying sometimes. I don’t understand why using dehumanizing language about them is so common in these cases.

[aceofstars16]

Tomato, Orange, and Onion for Ocean; Potato for Lily; Lemon for Jack; Mango for Diane; Red Apple for Danny; and Corn for Skylar, please?

I was gonna go to bed but…I started filling this out so here we go!

Ocean

🍅 [TOMATO] How misunderstood is your OC? In-universe or IRL.

Oooo…interesting question cause…I have been thinking about her and I think, in a sense…she feels really out of place and misunderstood, but her family understands that about her, so is she *really* misunderstood? Or just insecure? I think from the outside, most people wouldn’t really see her as out of place, but she still feels that way cause she doesn’t quite know how she fits into society…is this answering the question? Not sure, but it’s letting me get my thoughts out! 😂

🍊 [ORANGE] Does your OC have a prophecy surrounding them? If they don't, what would it be?

Hmmm, not that I have planned but hmmm if she did…ummm this is harder than I thought lol

“Water falls, deep and dark, lost in the abyss. The stars try to guide her home, if only she will open her eyes.”

Eh…good enough 😂

🧅 [ONION] What is a surefire to make your OC cry? Who knows of this information?

Hmmm, this is hard…cause I want to think of something silly but Ocean is kind of a…tough girl, she doesn’t really get scared easily and even if she got hurt physically, she’d try not to show she was in pain. I think really…if something happened to Orion, that would get to her though, he’s definitely her soft spot.

(And maybe…in their GF universe (cause I want to make them their own story but I love the GF spin…) she might cry some if people bring up memories of Ford. She only knew him for…eh…6 or 7 years? But they were really close and she misses him 🥲)

Her family would definitely know about her memories of Ford, but…not sure about the other…but Orion might know…

Lily

🥔 [POTATO] What do they have that others see as a flaw, but they don't care about?

Boy….Lily has so many insecurities that…I really don’t know. She sees more flaws in herself than others see in her tbh…

I mean I guess she is kind of….smart but like…she tries not to rub it in people’s faces…maybe it’s her desire for other people to take care of themselves. And sometimes she could maybe pressure them a *little* much to be open with their emotions and issues, but she tries not to…

Jack

🍋 [LEMON] What is their kryptonite/ultimate weakness?

Oh man…he really does *not* like showing he cares but like…bro if he cares he will do *anything* for you (sometimes, showing his care is hard but anything else? Yes).

I mean….I can just say…Tina (his girlfriend), she makes him so flustered and not like himself, I will just go with her lol 😂 (and also if someone starts crying, his walls usually come down a little cause he doesn’t like crying so he will try to do anything to help them feel better, even if he’s awkward about it)

Diane

🥭 [MANGO] What colours best represent them and why? Does this differ from their favourites?

I feel like red….yes it’s her hair color but…it works…she’s very…angry…😅

I’m not sure what her favorite color it tbh…maybe purple? So close but different?

Danny

🍎 [RED APPLE] Who does your OC value above all else?

Well, he’s my Christian boy, so God! But also his family, him and his mom are close (though they have had struggles lately) but he also loves his step dad and siblings a bunch! And his friends! He’s got a big heart 🥲

Skylar

🌽 [CORN] How good are they at hiding and finding their way?

Hmmm, hiding, she’d be pretty good I think (totally not cause she had experience as a kid with hiding from her awful dad…) cause she’s small. But directions? Ehhhh…she doesn’t strike me as being very directionally inclined…like she might manage okay but…eh…🥴