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#and learn to be present with the people around you and how to focus on what you can give to others as much as what you can receive
13eyond13 · 2 years
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#as somebody who is unfortunately probably older than a lot of other people here by now#lemme just do my thing and dispense wisdom nobody asked for once more#guess what adults also still crave that parenting they never got when they were younger too#or perhaps that overindulgent parenting that they got spoiled by and addicted to#emotionally my 88 year old grandma is still a child on the inside looking for her dad to tell her she did a good job#and if you don't take steps to be aware of it#and to cultivate self-worth and solace in something other than receiving that one specific thing#and learn to be present with the people around you and how to focus on what you can give to others as much as what you can receive#that craving never really goes away#you can spend your entire life with tunnel vision chasing it#the older people in your life probably still feel that craving just as strongly as you do#they just had to eventually come to terms with it somehow carry on and start trying to take care of the younger people as best they can#definitely hilarious when you realize you're like the parent figure to people when you're like omg no i still didn't get to be the baby yet#and often times you also will become the parent figure to people much older than yourself as well#including (perhaps) eventually your own parents#anyways i would say that explains a lot about the dumbness of adults of all ages#it definitely sucks but#i think the nice thing to do is to try to give the younger people more of the understanding and support that will hopefully help them#be well-adjusted and prepare#for their own fun times in their 20s and beyond#if you can#seeing it more as building community rather than engaging in competition is the goal for me these days#p
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50 Character Personality Traits + Meanings (For writers, worldbuilders, and artists) Part 1
Adventurous - Enjoys trying new experiences and exploring the unknown.
Ambitious - Driven to succeed and achieve their goals.
Analytical - Tends to think critically and examine things in-depth.
Artistic - Highly creative and expresses themselves through artistic mediums.
Assertive - Confident in expressing their thoughts and feelings.
Caring - Shows compassion and concern for the well-being of others.
Charismatic - Has a natural charm and appeal that draws people in.
Clever - Able to come up with creative solutions and make astute observations.
Compassionate - Displays empathy and a desire to help those in need.
Confident - Believes in their own abilities and is self-assured.
Conscientious - Reliable, responsible, and attentive to detail.
Curious - Eager to learn new things and explore the world around them.
Cynical - Tends to be skeptical and distrustful of others' motives.
Dependable - Can be counted on to follow through on their commitments.
Determined - Persistent in pursuing their goals and overcoming challenges.
Diplomatic - Skilled at navigating social situations and resolving conflicts.
Eccentric - Displays unconventional or unusual behaviors and interests.
Empathetic - Able to understand and share the feelings of others.
Ethical - Guided by a strong moral compass and a sense of right and wrong.
Extraverted - Enjoys being around people and draws energy from social interactions.
Flexible - Adaptable to changes and open to trying new approaches.
Forgiving - Willing to let go of past hurts and give people second chances.
Friendly - Approachable and enjoys building positive relationships with others.
Grounded - Practical, down-to-earth, and focused on the present.
Hardworking - Diligent and dedicated in their efforts to achieve their goals.
Honest - Values truthfulness and integrity in their words and actions.
Idealistic - Driven by a vision of how the world should be and a desire to make a difference.
Imaginative - Possesses a rich inner world and creative problem-solving abilities.
Independent - Prefers to think and act for themselves without relying on others.
Indecisive - Struggles with making decisions and often second-guesses themselves.
Introverted - Finds energy and fulfillment in solitary activities and introspection.
Jealous - Experiences feelings of resentment or insecurity towards others.
Kind - Gentle, considerate, and thoughtful in their treatment of others.
Leaders - Able to inspire and guide others towards a common goal.
Logical - Approaches problems and decisions through a rational, analytical lens.
Materialistic - Highly values the acquisition of possessions and wealth.
Organized - Maintains order and efficiency in their personal and professional life.
Perfectionistic - Strives for flawlessness and can be overly critical of themselves and others.
Pessimistic - Tends to focus on the negative aspects of situations and expect the worst.
Resilient - Able to bounce back from setbacks and adapt to changes.
Risk-taker - Willing to take chances and step outside of their comfort zone.
Sarcastic - Uses irony and witty remarks to convey their thoughts and feelings.
Sensitive - Deeply affected by the emotions and experiences of themselves and others.
Stubborn - Unwilling to change their mind or compromise on their beliefs and opinions.
Suspicious - Inclined to doubt the motives and intentions of others.
Thoughtful - Considerate of the impact their words and actions have on others.
Timid - Shy, reserved, and hesitant to take risks or assert themselves.
Trustworthy - Reliable, honest, and worthy of confidence.
Unpredictable - Displays an element of surprise and spontaneity in their behavior.
Witty - Possesses a quick, clever, and humorous way of expressing themselves.
Hey fellow writers! I'm super excited to share that I've just launched a Tumblr community. I'm inviting all of you to join my community. All you have to do is fill out this Google form, and I'll personally send you an invitation to join the Write Right Society on Tumblr! Can't wait to see your posts!
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prettieinpink · 9 months
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BEING MAGNETIC THROUGH SOFTNESS
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BEING OPTIMISTIC, regardless of the circumstances. People love positivity and will gravitate to people who make them feel good regardless of their circumstances.
SMILE. Even if you’re just walking around, having a nice friendly smile appeals to people and deems you approachable.
HELP WHENEVER YOU CAN, hold the door for someone, or lift a small burden for them. However, if you’re helping someone and it is out of your capabilities, it’s people-pleasing.
BE PRESENT, don’t dwell on the past or worry about the future. Just focus on what you’re doing, and with who at that moment.
BE AN ACTIVE LISTENER, engage in conversations with people and genuinely take in the information they tell you + make an effort to remember these facts about them.
AVOID JUDGING AND GOSSIPING, no matter how nice you are, as soon as you display these traits, you create a distance between your friends/family. While honesty is valued, if people don’t feel like they can be their authentic selves around you, they’ll close themselves up.
GIVE COMPLIMENTS OFTEN. Only if you mean it. It doesn’t have to be someone who you’re close to, but even just passers-by.
BE VULNERABLE. People won’t open up to people who are closed up. Share your deepest fears, challenges and emotions to create a deeper connection and trust.
PRACTICE BEING HUMBLE, while it is okay to celebrate our successes, we must be mindful of the manner we do so. Acknowledge other’s efforts and be willing to learn from others.
REPLACE SORRY WITH THANK YOU. If you’re a serial say-sorry person, replace them with thank you. E.g. sorry I’m late -> thank you for patiently waiting.
BE OPEN-MINDED, surround yourself with a diverse environment, and be willing to learn from other’s perspectives.
TAKE ACCOUNTABILITY. Apologise when necessary and own up to your own mistakes, but be sure to not repeat them.
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plutosunshine · 21 days
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The ruler of your Ascendant — and its house
Understanding the house in which your Ascendant ruler (also known as the chart ruler) resides is a deeply personal journey in astrology. It provides intimate insight into the core themes that shape your life path, personality, and approach to the world. The Ascendant represents your outward identity, how you present yourself, and how others perceive you. Its ruling planet acts as a personal guide, and its placement in a specific house highlights the life areas where you are naturally drawn and likely to encounter significant experiences. This knowledge fosters a deeper connection to your own life story and experiences.
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Identify Your Ascendant: First, determine your Ascendant sign by calculating your birth chart. The Ascendant is the sign on the cusp of the 1st house.
   
Find the Ruling Planet of Your Ascendant:
   - Aries Ascendant: Mars
   - Taurus/Libra Ascendant: Venus
   - Gemini/Virgo Ascendant: Mercury
   - Cancer Ascendant: Moon
   - Leo Ascendant: Sun
   - Scorpio Ascendant: Pluto (modern) or Mars (traditional)
   - Sagittarius Ascendant: Jupiter
   - Capricorn Ascendant: Saturn
   - Aquarius Ascendant: Uranus (modern) or Saturn (traditional)
   - Pisces Ascendant: Neptune (modern) or Jupiter (traditional)
The ruler of your Ascendant is in the 1st house
This placement makes your identity, self-expression, and personal impact on the world the center of your life. The 1st house is the house of the self, so having your chart ruler here means you're strongly connected to who you are and how you present yourself to others. It's like your core energy radiates through your personality, making you a powerful force in shaping your life path.
People can't help but notice you. Whether you're naturally confident or working on building that self-assurance, your presence is hard to ignore. You're likely to take the initiative in life, often driven to carve out your own path rather than following others.
With the Ascendant ruler in the 1st house, personal independence is not just important, it's a defining feature of your character. You possess a strong sense of what you want and are driven to achieve it, even if it means going against the norm. This placement is all about you taking charge of your destiny.
You're wired to express yourself authentically. There's a deep drive to figure out who you are and ensure your outer life reflects your inner truth. You're not one to fake it—being authentic is what matters most to you.
This placement also means that your self-development is not just a passing phase but a lifelong focus. You're constantly evolving, and the challenges that push you to grow often revolve around how you perceive yourself and how others perceive you. Personal improvement might feel like a never-ending project, but this continuous growth keeps you moving forward.
This placement makes you magnetic, driven, and authentic, giving you the natural power to shape your own world. It's a direct alignment between who you are inside and what you project to the outside world!
The ruler of your Ascendant is in the 2nd house
You likely crave financial stability and material comfort. It's not just about money, though—it's about feeling secure and grounded in your life. This desire for financial stability is a reflection of your need for security and is completely understandable.
This placement makes you very attuned to your own value. You might tie your self-worth to how well you can support yourself or what you achieve in the material world. Learning to balance self-worth with what you have versus who you are is a key lesson for you.
Whether it's building wealth, a home, or even skills, you thrive on creating something lasting.
Your sense of self is deeply connected to what you personally find valuable, whether that's relationships, possessions, or even spiritual beliefs. These values guide your decisions and validate your alignment with your true self.
This placement drives you to create a life where you feel secure, self-sufficient, and aligned with what you truly value. You're not just looking for material wealth—you're building a life that reflects your deepest sense of self-worth and stability!
The ruler of your Ascendant is in the 3rd house
You’re someone who’s always asking questions, always wanting to know more. Your mind is sharp, and you probably dive into new topics, pick up different skills, or constantly seek intellectual stimulation. You’re naturally curious about the world, and this curiosity shapes your sense of self.
Whether it’s through writing, speaking, or teaching, expressing yourself is key. You likely feel at home when sharing your thoughts or bouncing ideas off others. Your voice matters, and you probably thrive when you can interact with others, exchange ideas, or stay in the know.
You might have strong ties to your local environment, like your neighborhood or community. Siblings, cousins, or close-knit social circles often play an important role in your life. Your relationships are likely a constant source of learning and growth for you.
With your chart ruler here, learning doesn’t stop. Whether through formal education or self-taught experiences, you never stop growing mentally. Engaging with new ideas keeps you feeling vibrant and connected to your identity.
The ruler of your Ascendant is in the 4th house
You're someone who finds a lot of meaning in your home environment. Whether creating a cozy space or being surrounded by loved ones, having a secure and nurturing home life is essential for your emotional well-being. You're likely someone who values privacy and needs time in your sanctuary to recharge.
Your family, especially your roots and ancestry, plays a big role in shaping your identity. You might feel a strong connection to your heritage or have a deep sense of responsibility toward your family. Exploring your family history or finding your place within the family dynamic can be a major part of your personal growth.
Beyond the physical home, emotional security is a huge focus for you. You might spend a lot of time reflecting on your inner self, working through emotional patterns that go way back to your childhood. Establishing a strong emotional foundation helps you feel grounded in who you are.
With this placement, you likely have a natural instinct to care for others. Whether you're nurturing family members, friends, or even your own inner child, creating a supportive and loving environment around you is part of your life's work.
The ruler of your Ascendant is in the 5th house
You're naturally drawn to creative pursuits, whether that's through art, music, writing, or any activity that lets you express your unique self. Creativity is not just a hobby for you; it's a core part of who you are. You feel most alive when you're putting your own personal stamp on something.
Having fun and doing things that make you happy isn't just a nice thing to have; it's really important for your overall well-being. You enjoy experiencing happiness in many different ways, whether it's through hobbies, having fun, or appreciating the little things in life. You know how to let loose and embrace the moment, which makes you magnetic to others.
When it comes to love, you approach it with passion and excitement. Romance, flirting, and playful connection are likely a big part of your life. You might also find that your relationships bring out the best in your self-expression, making love a key theme in your personal growth.
This placement makes you a natural at bringing fun, creativity, and love into the world. You're at your best when you enjoy life, follow your passions, and share your vibrant energy with others. Letting your creative and playful side lead the way is what truly makes you shine!
The ruler of your Ascendant is in the 6th house
Whether it's in your work, health, or personal habits, you're someone who thrives on getting things done. You might be the type who enjoys checking off tasks, organizing your day, and feeling productive. There's a profound sense of accomplishment in being efficient and dependable, and your efforts are truly commendable.
You likely find immense joy and satisfaction in helping others, whether that's through your job, taking care of loved ones, or simply being the go-to person when someone needs support. A natural part of you enjoys being of service and making life easier for those around you, and your altruistic nature is truly appreciated.
This placement often brings attention to your health and daily habits. You might be very conscious of how you take care of your body, mind, and spirit. Maintaining your well-being, whether through exercise, nutrition, or mental health routines, is a key part of feeling grounded and balanced.
The 6th house is also about self-improvement, so you always look for ways to grow. Whether picking up new skills at work, refining your routines, or focusing on personal development, you're motivated to keep evolving.
The ruler of your Ascendant is in the 7th house
Partnerships play a big role in your life. You're likely someone who thrives in close relationships, whether it's a romantic partner, best friend, or business collaborator. You feel more complete when you're sharing your life with someone else.
A big part of your life is about finding a balance between yourself and others. You're probably someone who likes harmony in your relationships and may go out of your way to ensure things are running smoothly between you and the people close to you.
You're drawn to people who mirror qualities you want to develop in yourself. Whether consciously or not, you tend to attract partners who help you grow; through these relationships, you learn a lot about who you are.
Working with others or being part of a team probably feels natural. You're not someone who likes to do things completely on your own—there's strength and fulfillment in knowing you have a partner by your side, whether in work or life.
You're likely good at reading people and understanding their needs. You can easily put yourself in someone else's shoes, which makes you a supportive and thoughtful partner.
The ruler of your Ascendant is in the 8th house
You don't like surface-level stuff. You crave depth, whether in relationships, conversations, or even understanding yourself. You probably want to dig into the "why" of everything, looking beyond what's obvious.
Change and growth are recurring themes in your life. You might undergo major transformations, either in how you see yourself or your life circumstances. You know how to rise from challenges stronger than before, almost like a phoenix.
Whether it's psychology, the mysteries of life, or even finances (like investments or shared resources), you're attracted to topics that others might shy away from. You have a natural curiosity for things that are hidden or misunderstood.
With your Ascendant ruler in the 8th, you might find that part of your life journey is learning to regain your power. Whether it's through overcoming personal challenges or helping others do the same, you're someone who seeks to understand power dynamics and work through them.
The ruler of your Ascendant is in the 9th house
Whether traveling to new places or exploring different ideas and cultures, you have a hunger for adventure. You thrive when you learn something new or experience life from a fresh perspective, and you're probably always thinking about your next big trip or goal.
You're not just interested in the day-to-day details—you want to understand the bigger picture. Whether through philosophy, spirituality or even just pondering the meaning of life, you're driven by a desire to understand the "why" behind everything.
Education, whether in school or through independent learning, is really important in your life. You enjoy learning about new things, and you might like helping others learn, too. Lifelong learning is your jam.
You're likely open to different cultures, ideas, and beliefs. You see value in diversity and are always looking to broaden your perspective. You're curious about what's out there and aren't afraid to challenge your own views.
You have a strong desire to find meaning and purpose in everything you do. Whether through your career, personal growth, or spiritual journey, you constantly seek something that brings direction and fulfillment to your life.
The ruler of your Ascendant is in the 10th house
You’ve got big goals and dreams and are not afraid to chase them. Whether climbing the career ladder or building a reputation, you have a strong drive to succeed and be recognized for your efforts.
Work and your professional life play a big part in your identity. You’re likely someone who puts a lot of energy into your career, and you probably feel most fulfilled when you’re making progress and reaching your goals.
How others see you, especially in a professional or public setting, matters to you. You’re likely very mindful of the image you project and want to be known for your accomplishments and integrity.
You’re not just thinking about short-term wins. You have an eye on the bigger picture, always thinking about how your actions today will impact your future. Building something that lasts—a career, a business, or a personal legacy—is important to you.
The ruler of your Ascendant is in the 11th house
Friendships and connections play a huge role in your life. You’re likely someone who loves being part of a community or network of like-minded people. Whether through social groups, clubs, or online communities, you’re energized by sharing ideas and experiences with others.
You’re not just thinking about personal success—you’re focused on long-term goals and the future. You probably have big ideas about how you want to contribute to the world or make an impact, and you’re always looking ahead, planning for what’s next.
Collaboration is your jam. You’re great at working with others toward a common goal, whether a cause, a project, or even shared fun. You understand that teamwork makes the dream work, and you’re likely the one who brings people together.
This placement is not just about what you can do for yourself but also about how you can be part of something larger. Causes, humanitarian efforts, or even just supporting friends in their dreams are important to you. You’re motivated by making a positive difference.
The 11th house is linked to innovation and new ideas, so you might be someone who’s into technology, progressive thinking, or just thinking outside the box. You enjoy exploring new concepts and staying ahead of the curve.
The ruler of your Ascendant is in the 12th house
You spend a lot of time in your head reflecting on life, your emotions, and the deeper meaning behind things. You’re probably more comfortable with your thoughts and feelings than most people and might need a lot of alone time to recharge.
Whether it’s spirituality, intuition, or just an interest in what’s hidden beneath the surface, you’re drawn to the mysterious side of life. You might be naturally intuitive, with a strong sense of things that aren’t immediately obvious to others.
You likely prefer keeping parts of yourself private, not necessarily because you’re secretive, but because you value your personal space.
This placement often suggests a path of personal healing and growth. You might go through deep transformations throughout your life, learning a lot about yourself by facing fears, letting go, or dealing with the past.
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sluttywoozi · 3 months
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Nothing Better | lch x reader
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A day at the pool is the perfect thing to remind you just how hot your boyfriend is (as if you could ever forget).
Rating: M (18+) | WC: ~5.2k | Pairing: lch x reader | Genre: smut
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Warnings: oral r and m receiving, face sitting, fingering, multiple orgasms, prone bone, creampie, breeding kink but just the cum part, cockwarming
Reader Notes: wears a one piece, has a vagina, wap, cries a little
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You’re starting to wonder if maybe going to the pool wasn’t your best idea. 
It’s not that you don’t like the water - you love to swim - and it’s not that you don’t like the sun (when you have sunscreen on), it’s just that your boyfriend looks a little too good all wet and glistening. You can’t seem to take your gaze off of him, and neither can what feels like half the people here. 
You’d be lying if you said you weren’t feeling at least a little territorial, though you know very well that Chan doesn’t have eyes for anyone but you. It’s obvious in the way he keeps glancing over at you from his floatie, checking to make sure you’re still where he left you and smiling softly when he sees that you are. 
You’re reading on your tablet, having bought a waterproof case just for this weekend trip, your elbows resting on the ledge and your body submerged in the water. He wanted to get some more sun before it set and you’re trying to avoid the very same, so you retreated to the shady end of the pool while he floated out to the sunny side. 
There are children splashing around and shouting but you’ve managed to tune them out, your focus locked on your book as it starts to build up to the climax. You haven’t gotten a lot of reading done so far, not with most of your attention on Chan, but you don’t mind that at all. You like to concentrate on being with him when you’re together, like to stay present and soak in every moment, especially since he started at his new job a few months ago. 
He’s been working so hard, putting in long hours and taking on extra projects in an effort to prove himself, but finally, he took a day off and proposed using the long weekend for a staycation. You’re only about an hour from both of your apartments but the hotel is swanky, the beds are cushy, the pool is warm, and you have Chan to yourself. 
You can tell he needed the break by the lax set of his shoulders and the unburdened curve of his smile, a stark difference to his demeanor just yesterday. His laughter comes easier too, you can hear it from across the pool as he joins a few kids in a diving contest, tossing neon pool toys into the shallow end and clapping for them every time they burst up with their treasure in hand. 
They toss the toys into the deep end and you watch as he cuts through the water, his muscled arms propelling him forward before he dips below the surface. It’s a matter of seconds before he shoots back up, holding four of the neon sticks with one hand and smoothing his soaking hair back with the other. 
You know you’re staring but you can’t help it, he’s just so toned and tanned and luscious looking, drenched with pool water and grinning bright enough to overpower the sun. Fuck, why does your boyfriend have to be so hot…
Not that you’re complaining. Far from it, in fact. You know how lucky you are to have found love in someone who’s as beautiful as they are kind, as sexy as they are smart, as handsome as they are funny. Chan is close to perfect, but that’s not why he’s perfect for you. 
It’s because he’s the kind of person who will cut short their relaxation time to play games with kids they don’t know. Because he’ll listen to and empathize with your problems before offering to help you find a solution and comforting you if there is none. Because he’s taken the time to learn you inside and out, dedicated himself to loving you and only you, made promises to you and actually fought to keep them. 
You trust him with your life, your heart, your body, and you know he feels the same way. 
All of that, unfortunately, just makes him even hotter in your eyes. 
Hot enough that though you’re nearing the most important part of your book, you’re wondering if you can drag him out of the pool and back up to the room. There are things you want to do to him and you can’t do any of them here. 
Thankfully, he’s started to wade over, tugging the floatie behind him and waving at you with an affectionate grin. You set your tablet on the edge of the pool and wave back, beaming as he approaches. 
“Hi baby,” he says happily when he arrives, leaning in to kiss your cheek and not even cringing when his lips meet sunscreen instead of bare skin. 
“Hi Channie, do you wanna head up soon?” You ask, hoping he’ll catch the undertone of desire in your voice. 
He doesn’t. 
“Maybe in like an hour? I want to swim some more, is that okay?” He asks so innocently that you don’t have the heart to tell him you want to swallow his cock then ride him into the sunset. 
“Sure, yeah, that’s fine,” you nod placidly, pasting on a fake smile and praying he’ll take it for a real one. 
He doesn’t. 
“What’s wrong?” His brow furrows in concern, his hand wrapping around your upper arm and his thumb brushing over your skin. 
“I just- I, um…” You lean in close to him and cup your hand around his ear, whispering, “You look so hot and I want your dick in my mouth, to be honest.”
“Oh,” He breathes heatedly, his hand tightening on your arm before he lets it slip down, his fingers tangling with yours. “We should go then. We should go right now.”
You just barely grab your tablet with your free hand before he drags you over to and up the stairs, pulling you behind him but walking carefully so neither of you slip. You gather your things up quickly, drying off as best you can before he takes your hand again and guides you around the pool to the small lobby of elevators. The kids wave at him as he goes and he distractedly waves back, still ushering you forward. 
You think he’d be jogging if the pool rules allowed it. 
The air in the elevator is tense, and if the walls weren’t made of glass, you know you’d be pressed up against one of them with his lips on yours. As it is, you can only squeeze his hand while it’s rising, standing next to him as it shoots up to the fifteenth floor and opens with a ding. 
“Do you have the key?” He asks urgently, watching as you dig through your bag to find the thin plastic card. You pull it free of the inner pocket and hold it to the mechanism, waiting for it to turn green. As soon as you hear the click of the lock, you’re pushing open the door and tugging Chan through, barely waiting for it to shut to turn and pull him into a kiss. 
He tastes like chlorine but you couldn’t care less, all you care about is getting his tongue in your mouth and your hands on his body. His abs tremble under your fingertips with every shaky breath he draws in, and they tense into a six pack when you sink to your knees. 
“Baby, you really want to?” He confirms, knowing that your gag reflex is more than a little bit sensitive and wanting to make sure you’re comfortable. 
“Yes, Chan, I really want to,” you murmur, your eyes already locked on the growing bulge in his swim shorts as you start to pull them down, letting gravity do the rest of the work. His dick bobs free and you catch it with one hand, your fingers wrapping around the base and squeezing tight as you guide it to your open mouth. 
You begin with gentle licks to the head, your tongue dragging over his sensitive skin and lapping at the ridge where it connects to the shaft, your eyes coasting up his body to find his half lidded and already on you. 
Now that you know he’s watching, you start to feed his cock into your mouth, moaning when you finally feel the weight of him on your tongue. He echoes you, groaning softly and gazing at you as he reaches the back of your throat. You can’t take him any further, but you know you don’t have to deepthroat him to make it good, not when you’ve made him cum like this before. 
He takes in a shuddering breath and rests his hand on your head when you start to bob up and down, swearing and fighting to keep his eyes open as you suction your cheeks around him. You fall into an easy rhythm and let your hand follow your mouth, stroking what you can’t swallow with a tight grip. 
You don’t know why you don’t do this more often. Having Chan at your mercy feels almost as good as his cock in your mouth does, and the knowledge that you’re bringing him pleasure is enough to make you feel it too. Your pussy is starting to throb with it, your clit beating in time with your heart as you grip his plush ass with your free hand, pulling him into you and taking him just a bit deeper. 
“Feels so good, baby,” he sighs blissfully, his fingers clenching in your hair when you suck up to the tip and swirl your tongue around the head. You hum in response, the vibrations making him groan and tilt his head back, highlighting the tantalizing arch of his neck and the sharp edge of his jawline. 
He doesn’t keep his eyes off you for long, his chin tucked to his chest as he watches you lap at the precum seeping out. It’s salty and bitter but you don’t mind the taste, knowing it means you’re doing a good job. 
Too good, apparently, because he cups your cheek and murmurs, “Baby, I don’t wanna cum without you.” 
Your knees are starting to ache anyway, so you press one last openmouthed kiss to the head of his cock and release him. He takes your hands and helps pull you up off the floor, leaning in and connecting his lips with yours, uncaring of the fact that his dick was just in your mouth. 
Chan’s a sweetie like that, though his kiss doesn’t stay sweet for long. He lets go of one of your hands and cups your neck, his thumb pressed to your pulse as he sucks your tongue into his mouth and moans around it. 
You’re sure he can feel your heart racing but you’re past being shy about his effect on you, know he loves to feel the physical evidence of your desire for him. He could feel even more if he slipped his other hand into your one piece, but it’s still tangled up with yours and you hate being the one to pull away. 
Chan knows this and gently untwines his fingers to grip your hip and steer you to the bed. You’re about to let him tip you back when you remember the fact that you just came up from the pool, pulling away to say breathlessly, “Chan, we’re still soaking wet, we need to get these suits off and hang them up.”
His mouth quirks in a fond half smile in response, the playful roll of his eyes soft and his hands even softer when he uses them to start pushing you toward the bathroom. He practically frog marches you to the sliding barn door, stopping only to swipe his trunks off the floor and working his fingers under the straps of your bathing suit as soon as you step foot on the tile. 
You hold onto his shoulders for stability as he peels the wet fabric down, sinking your fingers into his still-dripping hair when he kneels and presses his cheek to your stomach. 
“Let’s shower fast, I want you to sit on my face asap,” he sighs contentedly, smooching the soft skin of your belly before rising to his feet with your swimsuit in hand. 
You’re struck silent as heat floods your stomach and your cheeks, and he pinches one gently as he laughs, “What, you can be blunt but I can’t?” 
“You can be as blunt as you want if you keep saying things like that,” you assure him, reaching over to turn the shower on and fighting back the shiver that threatens to roll down your spine. 
“In that case…” He wraps his arms around you and brings you into his chest, warming you with his body heat. “I’ve wanted your thighs wrapped around my head since you climbed into my car in that sundress this morning.”
“Why’d we go straight to the pool, then?” You wonder, mystified. 
“You were so excited about your new waterproof case and getting to relax. I didn’t want to ruin the vibe with my dirty thoughts,” he pouts, reaching around you to feel the water and pushing aside the curtain so you can climb into the tub.
“Babe, I have literally never felt more relaxed than I do when you make me cum,” you admit to him as you step under the flow of the shower, tilting your head back to avoid getting your hair wet. “Your dirty thoughts can only enhance the vibe, not ruin it.”
“You promise?” He asks as he joins you in the tub, shielding you from the water. He pumps some body wash into his palm from the wall dispenser before sudsing his hands up and starting to glide them over your body. 
You hum happily and murmur, “I promise, Chan.”
Your eyes fall shut but you can still sense him smiling as he scrubs your skin free of sunscreen and chlorine. You feel fresh and clean and slightly dazed by the time he nudges you back under the water before stepping around you and beginning to clean himself off. You wake up enough to wash his back for him, spending an inordinate amount of time on his toned shoulders and digging your fingers into the knots that plague him from hours spent hunched in front of a computer. 
He rinses himself quickly and shuts the water off, grabbing a towel from the rack and carefully dabbing you dry before swiping the cotton over his own skin and stepping out of the tub. You know Chan gets out before you so he can catch you if you slip, and you can’t suppress the smile that ticks up the corners of your mouth as you climb over the ledge with his hands holding yours. 
He doesn’t release his hold even when you’ve got two feet on the tile, immediately guiding you back to the bedroom and letting go only to hold your hips as you set a knee on the bed and crawl on. 
“Don’t get too comfy yet,” he reminds you, leaping up and twisting to land onto his back midway up the bed. It would be funny if he weren’t eyeing you so heatedly, if you didn’t know exactly what’s about to happen. 
But with his pretty lips parted and his hands covetous as they reach for you, there’s no mistaking his eagerness for humor. You take in a shaky breath while you shuffle closer, your hands pressed to the mattress as you lift your knee up and settle it on the other side of his neck, leaving you straddling his face. 
“Now you can get comfortable, baby,” he says softly, his breath flowing out over your sensitive folds. His eyes are locked between your legs, and as you start to let yourself relax, he lays his tongue out, humming in satisfaction when your pussy finally makes contact with his taste buds. 
Chan eats you out often but hardly ever like this, mainly because you find it difficult to completely let yourself go and just feel. You’re always worried about smothering him or being too heavy or if he’s really enjoying it, no matter how much he reassures you. 
But there’s something about this time. 
Maybe it’s the way his eyes slipped closed as soon as his tongue touched you, like you’re a delicacy he’s privileged to taste. Maybe it’s how he’s gripping your hips and pulling you down, like he wants you to smother him. Maybe it’s the near constant moan vibrating against you, like there’s nothing he’d rather be doing than this. 
Whatever it is, you think you finally believe him. 
Which is why your thighs untense, letting you rest fully on his face as you bend over and prop yourself up on your elbows, sinking into the feeling. 
He just groans in encouragement and wraps his arms around you, digging his fingertips into your skin and urging you to grind. You roll your hips once, whimpering at the sensation of his nose pressing into your clit as his tongue slides inside of you, and that’s enough to get you going. 
You set a gentle pace, sliding in little movements back and forth, barely even registering the obscene sounds of Chan’s mouth at work between your thighs. They’re muffled by your body and before long, they become background noise to the ringing in your ears and the rush of your blood pumping in your veins as he devours you. 
He doesn’t let up for even a second, shifting his focus instead, his lips wrapping around your clit and sucking in pulses. His tongue taps at the bud incessantly, his moans urgent as if he’s wordlessly begging you to let your release find you. 
It’s slow going but you can feel it creeping up on you, your climax rolling in like fog on a chilly morning as you try to beckon it closer in your mind. It pulls you in instead, its blissful vines coiling around you as he whines and whimpers into your pussy. 
Finally, the pleasure takes root, blooming within you gently at first before unfurling with ardor, stealing the air in your lungs and the thoughts in your head. Your head falls and your eyes flutter shut, and soon enough, all you can do is kneel there and tremble through the barrage of feelings, the softness of his tongue and the heat of his breath and the reverberations of his groans rendering you helpless. 
You’re still shaking by the time you regain the ability for complex thought, and the first thing you do is attempt to climb off of him. 
Except Chan doesn’t let you go, he just shakes his head and wraps one arm tighter around your body, bringing the other behind you to prime two fingers at your entrance. He doesn’t even bother speaking, simply grunting around your clit and starting to sink his fingers inside, the slickness of your cunt enough to let them glide. 
You melt into him with a moan, reaching one hand down to tangle your hand in his hair and pull as your back arches, trying to guide his fingers to that one spot inside as if he doesn’t always find it on his own. 
And find it, he does, his fingertips grazing the erogenous patch and beckoning forth a little burst of arousal that you just know is seeping down his chin. He’ll need another shower after this but you can’t find it in yourself to care, not when he immediately starts building you up again with his mouth around your clit and his fingers buried inside of you. 
Your hips respond to his thrusts without your permission, rolling into his every touch, and for the first time, you actually find yourself riding his face. He moves with you, whimpering continuously into your pussy as if he’s feeling your pleasure like it’s his own. 
Your head starts to spin, the blaze of white hot euphoria licking at your spine and heating your skin, making sweat prickle where he grips you like a lifeline as he voluntarily drowns himself in you. 
Everything zeroes down to the point of connection between your body and his, the only thing on your mind being the high that’s just out of your reach. It’s just a matter of time with his fingers grinding into your sweet spot and his lips wrapped around your clit, with his whines vibrating against you and his skin pressed to yours. 
You know he wants you to cum, and that’s part of what’s getting you so close. Chan loves to give you pleasure, views it as both his duty as your boyfriend and his privilege as a man, and he always feels a sense of accomplishment when he can get you there more than once. He’s also just a generous person, a giver, and that doesn’t change when it comes to being with you. 
It’s not that you’re not a giver too, it’s just that you know how to take. 
You know how to take the bliss he insists you feel, how to take his mouth and his fingers and eventually, his cock. You know how to take everything he wants to give you, and that’s why you work so well together. 
It’s like you don’t need words anymore, not when you can read his actions just as well. 
And with his actions, he’s telling you to stop thinking and just feel, just let him guide you over that edge, which is absolutely something you can do. 
It doesn’t take much at all to clear your mind, a curl of his fingers and a pulse of his lips around your clit sweeping your thoughts away, leaving you muddled with sensation. You hiccup in a breath and sigh out a shaky moan, your thighs trembling on either side of his face as you near the drop off once more. 
You let it happen, let him push you off the edge into the deep end and welcome the waves of bliss that wash over you. They’re more powerful than the last, blanking out every word in your brain but his name, all of your focus centered between your legs where he’s still hard at work. 
He pushes you through it, digging his fingers into your sweet spot and groaning around your clit as his hand squeezes at your hip. A hot rush of arousal leaves you, and he’s quick to slide his fingers out and open his mouth to catch it. 
His tongue swipes at your entrance, dipping in and out as he drinks you down, his body shuddering under yours at the feeling of your fluttering pussy. 
By the time it’s over, you can barely hold yourself up. Chan seems to sense this and pulls himself out from under you, gently tugging at your legs until they lay straight with you resting on your stomach. 
You feel his touch on your back, a gentle hand rubbing up and down softly as he comes to rest at your side, nosing at your hairline. 
“So good, baby. Just what I wanted,” he murmurs to you, and you pick your head up and turn it to face him, blinking bleary eyes at his flawless visage. 
“Want your dick in me,” you mumble thickly, watching as his eyebrows furrow contemplatively. 
“You’re not too tired?” He questions, and you try to respond but you can only look at his lips and the sheen of you on them. 
“So what if I am? Maybe I wanna fall asleep on your cock,” you finally say, half playful, half truthful. 
“Like… cockwarming? Would you really wanna do that?” He asks eagerly, and you grin a teasing little grin, happy to have unlocked one of his secret desires. 
“Yeah, Chan, I would really wanna do that,” you confirm. “Maybe even today… after you fuck me?”
“Okay,” he beams, pressing a kiss to your nose before springing up with a shocking amount of energy and climbing atop you. 
He straddles your hips and sets both hands on your ass, pushing the cheeks apart to expose your pussy to his searching eye. He releases one side to grab his cock and line himself up, slowly beginning to push inside and choking out a breath as he feels your warm wetness wrap around him. 
Chan is the perfect size for you, not too big or too thick, but just enough that there’s a slight stretch every single time. You fit him like a glove, like puzzle pieces meant to interlock, and somehow, every time he slides inside of you makes you feel like you’re the home that welcomes him after a long time away. 
He bottoms out and it’s like you can finally breathe, even as he stretches himself out on top of you and tucks your hands under his, weaving your fingers together and holding tight.  
You’re completely surrounded by him and that’s enough to have you relaxing into the bed, the only muscles activated in your body being the ones holding your ass up for him as he rolls his hips back and sends them forward again. 
You love having him this close as he takes you apart, being able to feel his strength in the muscled arms stretched along yours and the toned chest pressed to your back has you wanting him even closer. Given the chance, you just might climb into his rib cage and squeeze right in next to his big, luscious heart. That might be a little much though, so for now you’ll content yourself with being smothered by his perfect body. 
The feeling of his dick pressed against your walls to root deep has you reeling, making you thankful for the grip of his hands over yours, the weight of them serving as a reminder that he’s here and he’s got you.
He sets up a smooth, easy tempo, one that reminds you of ocean waves pushing onto and then receding from the shore, filling you with his cock again and again. You miss him every time he leaves but he returns before the emptiness starts to ache, the ebb and flow of him as constant as the tide. 
“‘s this what you wanted, baby?” He murmurs into your neck, waiting for your nod to continue to speak. “Gonna let me fill you up? Gonna let me stay inside?” 
“Yeah, Channie, want you to fill me up and stay inside me,” you whimper, squeezing your inner muscles around him to emphasize your words, the tight clutch of your cunt making him tremble above you. 
“Fuck,” you hear him bite out just before his hips scoop on the next stroke in, the angle allowing his cock to graze your sweet spot. Pleasure zips up your spine, sharp and electric, making your back arch and your pussy clench. 
He notices the way you push back into it and begins to aim every thrust there, ensuring that he drags against the internal patch of nerves as often as he can. He’s still going slowly, his movements almost sedate though there’s an intensity to them, one that you know will be enough to undo you. 
Chan always gets you there, even on nights where it’s harder to climb that hill, nights where you’re distracted or stressed or anxious. You reach for him on nights like that anyway, knowing that soon enough, he’ll have you so blissed out that you’ll forget what was wrong in the first place. 
Nothing could be wrong today, and that makes everything even better, makes his name on your lips taste sweeter, his body on top of yours feel broader, and his cock inside of you hit deeper. It almost feels like he’s reaching the end of you every time his hips buck into yours, the dull smack barely audible with his gasping breaths and shuddering groans in your ear. 
The medley of it all has you feeling dizzy, rapturous, like pure affection and desire and devotion are welling up inside you. They’re rapidly running out of room, your chest only so big compared to your love-soaked heart, and there’s little you can do to quell the overflow as it streams from your eyes in tender tears. 
You try to swallow down the sob that aches to be let out but your lungs trip on it anyway, and Chan just coos and burrows closer to you with a sweet kiss on the cheek. He knows this means you’re getting close and that he shouldn’t do anything but keep going, though you wonder if he knows that it’s unlikely you’ll cum from just his cock. 
He does, of course he does, extricating one of his hands from yours and sliding it down under your body and between your legs. His fingers gather the arousal he’s pushed out with his dick and smear it up to your clit, beginning to rub slow, gentle circles that match the push and pull of his hips. 
The feeling is instantaneous, a syrupy burning starting up low in your pelvis before gathering in your stomach, your pussy responding to the sensation by fluttering around him and trying to suck him in deeper. 
He doesn’t stop, just maintains his slow and steady pace, patiently working you up to your third orgasm and sucking kisses along the curve of your throat, murmuring to you, “Please cum, baby, please cum for me. It’s gonna feel so good, I know you can do it. When you cum, I’ll cum too, okay? I’ll fill you up with my cum and I’ll stay inside and when we wake up, we’ll do it all over again.”
And what can you do with him begging like that, with his dulcet voice and steadily rolling hips and expert fingers on your clit, except exactly what he wants? 
With a whimper you fall to pieces beneath him, euphoria flowing through your veins and dousing your nerve endings, blanking out everything in your mind but his name. It falls from your lips like a spell, like an incantation urging him to shatter with you, the chant constant even as your lungs plead for air. 
But it works. 
It works and he bursts with a low cry, his cock twitching against your undulating walls, a warmth flooding you deep within as his cum paints your insides white. He trembles above you, the muscles that have been holding him up weakened by pleasure, and soon enough he completely sinks into you, weighing you down to the bed. 
“That was so good, baby… Love you so much… Now let’s sleep,” he slurs quietly, just barely shifting to the side so he’s not suffocating you, though he leaves his still hard, still throbbing, still leaking cock buried inside of you. 
Normally that would keep you awake, but days at the pool are always draining and you did just cum three times, so you think a little sleep would do you good. 
When Chan’s arms snake around you and tug you tighter into his chest, you giggle weakly and murmur, “Love you, Chan,” before letting your eyes slip closed and following him into slumber. 
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AN: Woohoo!! this started as interlude no. 10 a few months ago but i got like 2k in and lost inspo for it. i picked it back up this week and here we are!
thank you for reading, i hope you enjoyed!! i am eager to know your thoughts and feelings 🙏
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ashherahh · 1 month
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your first time with your future spouse +18
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Note: Please take it if it resonates, leave it if it doesn't. Meditate before making your decision. It's completely okay if you don't resonate with this reading. The collective is huge and I'm sure you'll receive the messages you need in due time.
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pile 1
You're seen as quite meek by most people and even by your future spouse when you first meet them. Eventually they learn what a little freak you are! You're so prim and proper and polite in front of others but when you're alone you're a bit depraved. You're what people would call a mental slut.
The energy I'm picking up is that you weren't really sexually compatible with previous partners and so you just thought that you're not someone who feels that intense sexual attraction people always seem to be talking about. That doesn't stop all the thoughts you have.
There's a strong energy of abstinence but there's definitely an underlying energy of someone that is like a caged werewolf under a full moon.
To explain what I'm seeing, it's as though you do get sexually aroused but no one seems to tick your boxes in a sense so you haven't gone all the way in a hot minute. It's like mentally, you're really pumped up and then you're in front of someone and it's like being thrown with a bucket of ice water. I am seeing a problem with climaxing and your mind kind of wanders a bit.
When you first do the deed with your future spouse, you give disclosures and you do make them aware of how you feel about sex and your experiences. You're very open with them, mainly because you don't want to get your hopes up and you don't want them to be disappointed.
Your future spouse is very patient with you and they're very understanding. I'm seeing you're very comfortable with them, that's why the two of you are able to discuss intimacy so openly.
Lemme tell you something, they are so confident in themselves and they're going to teach you a thing or two. Wink wink, nudge nudge.
They keep this to themselves because they don't want you to overthink your first time together and they want to keep you as present in the act as they possibly can.
You ever crave something but you can't seem to figure out what it is? Then when you do stumble across it, it's like puzzle pieces falling in place. That's what your first time with them is like.
I'm seeing that they hold you quite close to them through the entire act. They'll keep your back to their front or they'll put you in positions where you feel like they're all over you.
They talk you through it, not really dirty talk but more like they give you a lot of praises. I'm seeing that they touch your belly a lot, that's a very sensitive spot for you that you didn't even know about.
Your future spouse has stamina and I do see it takes a while for you to orgasm the first time but their focus is completely on you. They really get off on seeing you thoroughly pleasured. You two leave each other feeling so satisfied, and it only gets better from there.
pile 2
You love your future spouse's voice and their hands. It's as though your entire body is voice activated around them. That's the first thing you notice about them. I'm seeing that they have an accent different from yours as well.
They have a very commanding energy. Someone who is very solid and stable and career oriented. Big boss vibes.
They use that same energy in the bedroom...
Hehehe oh they like to stand behind you and whisper in your ear, even if it's normal things, they like to tease you and see your reaction to them.
They have beautiful hands and because they've picked up on how much you like that part of them, they're constantly putting them on display so to speak. They also like to flex around you too. The physical attraction between the two of you is so carnal and thick, you could cut through it with a knife.
You two know each other, I am seeing a work setting. You're in an environment with them whereby if you weren't, you wouldn't know one another or be in the same circles because of how different you are. I am seeing that you guys are not dating when you have sex for the first time but it does become an exclusive relationship afterwards.
You mask your attraction to them behind annoyance, but because they're quite attractive and very charismatic, they can see it and they do things on purpose to get a rise out of you. Your discussions become quite heated with them, they like to debate with you.
Your future spouse is a brat tamer and you're a brat. Even if you're not into the BDSM lifestyle, they're definitely not vanilla, that's the kind of dynamic you have. So, your first time with them is very... unplanned. It's sudden and kind of just happens but it's so explosive. I see this happening in their space so to speak.
They spent so long teasing you and riling you up, that they have been doing it to themselves in the process as well.
It's as though your spouse was waiting so long for this and they have no control at all. They're like someone starved and they want to do everything with you. Meanwhile you're just head empty because did you want this all along? Ohmygoodness, you did!
Goodness, your first time is more like a quickie because you two just can't control yourselves around each other!
You both come to terms with your true feelings for each other during the act. It's like a revelation. You can't get enough of one another.
pile 3
Tantric sex. Your first time with your future spouse is so spiritual, it's proper lovemaking. Not rushed, no anxiety, no overthinking. This is like a joining of souls.
I'm seeing that you and you future spouse take the act of sex very, very seriously. You two are very involved in spirituality so you both don't want any unwanted soul ties or things like that. I am seeing you two waiting a looooong time before having sex. I'm seeing strongly that many of you will wait until you're married, I'm not seeing a conventional marriage ceremony either.
Because of the lifestyle you practice, you want to make sure that you're in this forever. Your future spouse already feels that they'll spend the rest of their earthly life with you and so they're not rushed to have you the first time. You on the other hand... you're chomping at the bit to have them and they know it but they always redirect your energy. Your libido seems a lot higher than theirs on the surface, but it's only because they've been practicing on controlling theirs a lot longer than you have.
I see that they were born into this lifestyle and these spiritual practices, and you only started later in life.
They try and get you to do other activities to get your mind off of sex but sometimes you'll just be looking at them and they'll catch you and be like, "Nah uh, not my goodies, not yet."
It's really not that they don't want you but they want things to be in place before they have you like that so to speak. Sometimes, even though you understand where they're coming from, you still feel at times that they're not into you.
All of that goes out of the window your first time with them!
They really set the mood with candles and music. They take their time preparing you as well. They'll give you a full body massage. They love to use their mouth on you... So, foreplay will have them with their head between your legs for a while.
I'm seeing that their eyes are on you constantly, even in the throws of pleasure they'll try to keep looking into your eyes. They'll be watching your reactions and they love to hear you.
Phew! It's hot in here!
You were not expecting your future spouse to be so intense and so passionate. Their sexual energy is not really "aggressive", it's more sensual. They want all of your senses to be tantalised. All of those times they have you do something else will be so worth it.
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jnece-maharlika · 4 months
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Pt2Danny Accidentally becomes the Ghost king, the president and the biggest threat to Bruce's social status.
Pt 1 link:
Part 2 Danny becomes the president.
Amity Parkers are the most adaptable people in the world. They're barely fazed by anything.
If you throw them into a situation that they are very unfamiliar with, it'll only take them five minutes to adjust before they start planning on how to live with this situation.
The Amity Parker mindset is: "Oh, I guess this is happening now."
So when the ghosts start attacking? The Amity Parkers immediately look for ways to avoid and protect themselves from the ghosts, not even questioning why ghosts are real. The only thing they think about is, "Damn, there's a ghost. I hope it doesn't attack the theater; I really want to see that movie."
When Phantom had his debut as a hero? The Amity Parkers started looking for ways to help, ways to keep out of his way (some to try and keep him away). The thought running through their minds was, "So this one is trying to protect us? Guess we have a hero now."
Amity Parkers don't spend their time getting mad at the sudden change of routine, the sudden loss of normalcy, or the broken buildings. Amity Parkers don't ask why and how ghosts are real, don't question if all ghosts are evil or if there are some good ghosts, and don't even think of how to get rid of them completely (they're part of the community now). They only look for ways to keep themselves from getting overshadowed. They definitely don't spend time thinking if the ghosts could bring more danger in the future or looking for more information for possible contingency plans. They aren't Batman; they believe that if the present is good, then the future will be better.
Point is, Amity Parkers are resilient and adaptable. They will take everything in stride and focus on the present. So what if some ghosts attack and block the street? They need to get to work, so they'll just drive around it.
After the whole Pariah Dark thing, they become liminal, gaining some form of super strength and glowing eyes (symptoms vary based on how strong the radiation on a person is). A normal human would think, "OH MY GOD, I'M DYING!" The Amity Parkers went, "Oh, cool, this is cool, but now I'm having a problem with opening doors without breaking the knob. Maybe the Fentons could do something about it, make stronger knobs or something."
When some babies started gaining some inhuman features? Some start floating? (Sharper ears, fangs. Babies adapt to things faster, so they get more ecto radiation.) The Amity parents went, "Is there a way to keep my child on the ground without leashing them like a dog?" Then proceeded to make a help blog for other Amity parents dealing with the same things.
So when the ghosts start becoming more of the community rather than enemies, the Amity Parkers just shrugged and asked for a book of ghost customs so they don't accidentally offend them.
When the Fentons started making ghost and human-safe items, no one even questioned why Danny had so much money and was funding his parents' research.
When Danny's name was almost (if not) in everything and he seemed to own most of the town, no one questioned it.
But everything changed when the GIW came again. Even the Amity Parkers weren't expecting this change.
The GIW waltzed in, claiming the liminal town was theirs to play with and started attacking everyone, including the Amity Parkers. The Amity Parkers went full defense mode, protecting the ghosts that were now their friends/neighbors/lovers, making sure that nothing would harm them.
They learned that it was Vlad who called on the GIW. He was pissed and petty that the crown was taken from him and decided to report his liminal town, pretending to be a "concerned mayor" who "wants his people to be healed."
The Amity Parkers were mad... they were furious.
And in the moment they saw Phantom fall to the ground, unconscious, and watched him de-transform from the hero King Phantom to the kid that owns and funds the most helpful companies in town, something changed. Something in the Amity Parkers changed.
Keep in mind that Amity Parkers don't change; they remain the same as they adapt to whatever change the world throws at them.
NEVER ONCE HAD THE AMITY PARKERS DECIDED TO MAKE A CHANGE THEMSELVES.
The first thing they changed? Their mentality. NEVER AGAIN WERE THEY GOING TO LET OUTSIDE FACTORS CHANGE THEIR LIVES. THIS IS THEIR TOWN AND IT WILL STAY THAT WAY.
God help the GIW for being their first victims.
An angry town of liminals, ghosts, and borderline gods, who have access to the Fentons' very destructive and effective technology.
Vs.
The regular GIW humans with anti-ghost tech they stole from the Fentons and nothing against liminals.
The battle was a swift victory, destroying not only the GIW in town but also all of its branches (and Vlad) with almost no traces of them even existing in the first place.
The change didn't stop there, however.
The Amity Parkers banded together with Team Phantom and the Fentons (minus Danny, as he is healing and shouldn't know about their plans; the hero should rest) and took out some of that ghost king money that Danny's trying to get rid of. They crashed the UN meeting while kidnapping the president of America.
The Amity Parkers have decided that Amity Park is theirs; it belongs to the people and its heroes. But how is it supposed to be truly theirs if they have to follow the rules of the country that funded the GIW?
A couple of death threats, bribing, more death threats and more money bribing to make sure the anti ecto acts are gone and the League of Bitches (Phantom called the JL that, and the Amity Parkers decided it was true) doesn't know about it, and a couple of hours in the nightmare realm (courtesy of Fright Knight, who happily participated when he found out what happened), and Amity Park was now its own independent country.
They decided that Tucker was to be a main part of security, letting him put up another firewall like the GIW did to make sure no one knows about their country. They don't want the League of Bitches or any outsider in the King's Haunt. It's theirs now; it belongs to the Ghost King of Amity Park, outsiders be gone.
And when it came to deciding who would be leader? There was no hesitation as they wrote down:
Daniel "Danny Phantom" Fenton, King of the Infinite Realms, King and President of Amity Park.
___________________
A couple of years later, Batman, finding hints of a "Lazarus pit" in Illinois, send Flash to look around for anything suspicious. Flash, hyper focused on following his gps, hits a wall, literally faceplants into it.He double checks his map, the wall wasn't supposed to be there. He goes around it, there no way in, no way out. He goes back to batman and reports.
Pt3 soon.
Tags as requested
@nana-mizu-shiki
@talia-scar123
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esotericalchemist · 13 days
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𝐌𝐞𝐫𝐜𝐮𝐫𝐲 - 𝐇𝐨𝐰 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐝𝐞𝐜𝐚𝐧 𝐚𝐟𝐟𝐞𝐜𝐭𝐬 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐌𝐞𝐫𝐜𝐮𝐫𝐢𝐚𝐥 𝐞𝐧𝐞𝐫𝐠𝐲 ₊˚ˑ༄ؘ
Masterlist - YouTube (subliminals)
Mercury in astrology governs how we think, communicate, and process information, shaping our mental faculties and how we interact with the world. Just as each sign brings its unique energy to Mercury, there’s an even deeper layer to explore—the decans. Each decan offers a more nuanced view of Mercury’s influence, subtly shifting how we think, speak, and connect based on the specific degrees of the sign it occupies. While Mercury guides our intellectual pursuits and expression, understanding its decans can provide insight into the unique flavor each person brings to communication and learning. As we dive into this deeper exploration, we begin to see how Mercury’s placement in each decan influences not only our minds but also the ways in which we share our ideas and connect with others. Through this understanding, we can unlock a more profound appreciation of our mental strengths, challenges, and the paths toward using our communication skills for growth and transformation.
Decan - How to find your Mercury Decan
To find your Mercury decan, you'll need to know the degree Mercury falls within your zodiac sign. Every sign covers 30 degrees, and each sign is divided into three decans, each spanning 10 degrees:
0°-10°: First Decan, ruled by the sign's primary planet.
10°-20°: Second Decan, influenced by the next sign in the same element.
20°-30°: Third Decan, influenced by the final sign in the same element.
For example, if your Mercury is in Leo at 5°, it falls in the First Decan, ruled by the Sun, giving you a bold, expressive communication style. If Mercury is in Gemini at 15°, it’s in the Second Decan, ruled by Venus, adding charm and diplomacy to your intellect.
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𝐀𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐬 𝐌𝐞𝐫𝐜𝐮𝐫𝐲
First decan (0 - 10 degrees) -- Ruled by Mars
If your Mercury is in the first decan of Aries, your mind operates with speed and urgency, thanks to the influence of Mars. You think quickly, preferring to jump right into action rather than getting lost in details or overanalyzing. When faced with a challenge, you prefer to cut straight to the solution, making your communication style direct and confident. You’re not one for sugarcoating—when you speak, it’s with passion and decisiveness. This can make you seem bold or even blunt, but for you, honesty and getting to the point are more important than politeness or tact.
Subtlety is not your strong suit; you prefer straightforward conversations and often find it frustrating when things are left unsaid or implied. You excel in debates or competitive environments, where your quick thinking and decisive nature can shine. People around you might feel like they need to keep up with your fast mental pace, as you rarely waste time in conversations or decisions.
To make the most of this Mercury energy, focus on activities that require quick decision-making, like debates, leadership roles, or fast-paced problem-solving. You thrive in environments that value boldness and action, where you can confidently take the lead and communicate with authority.
Second decan (10 - 20 degrees) -- Ruled by Sun
In the second decan of Aries, your Mercury is influenced by the Sun, which adds charisma and creativity to your communication style. You’re still quick-minded like the first decan, but now there’s a natural desire to stand out and make an impact with your words. When you speak, people listen—not only because of what you say but because of the way you say it. There’s a magnetic quality to your communication, and you have a flair for expressing yourself in ways that capture attention.
Your thinking is creative and bold, and you enjoy adding a personal touch to everything you say or do. Whether in group discussions, presentations, or creative endeavors, you tend to take the lead and inspire those around you with your confidence and vision. You see challenges as opportunities to express your individuality and creative problem-solving skills.
To fully utilize your Mercury energy, focus on activities that let you express your ideas dynamically, such as public speaking, writing, or performing. You thrive in situations where you can take center stage, lead with your voice, and inspire others with your innovative thinking.
Third decan (20 - 30 degrees) -- Ruled by Jupiter
If your Mercury falls in the third decan of Aries, your communication is influenced by Jupiter, which gives you a visionary and expansive approach to thinking. You’re not content with small ideas—your mind is constantly searching for the bigger picture and ways to push boundaries. There’s a philosophical edge to your thinking, and you enjoy exploring larger truths and higher ideals. When you speak, you aim to inspire others, often encouraging them to see the world in new and broader ways.
You’re passionate about learning and sharing knowledge, and your communication style reflects this expansive vision. Rather than getting bogged down by details, you focus on big ideas and future-oriented goals. People with this placement are often seen as inspiring communicators, whether they’re teaching, leading, or discussing personal growth.
To make the most of your Mercury energy, engage in activities that involve exploring and communicating grand ideas. Teaching, public speaking, writing, or working in fields like philosophy, travel, or personal development are ideal for you. You excel when you can inspire others to think bigger and explore new horizons, and you’re happiest when working on projects with a sense of adventure and growth.
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𝐓𝐚𝐮𝐫𝐮𝐬 𝐌𝐞𝐫𝐜𝐮𝐫𝐲
First decan (0 - 10 degrees) -- Ruled by Venus
If your Mercury is in the first decan of Taurus, ruled by Venus, your thinking and communication style are steady, grounded, and deliberate. You like to take your time to fully process information and are not easily rushed into making decisions. Your speech is calm and measured, often conveying a sense of authority and ease. There’s a natural beauty in how you express yourself—whether it’s the tone of your voice or the way you choose your words, others feel comfortable listening to you.
Your thoughts tend to revolve around practicality and how ideas can translate into something tangible. You’re not swayed by fleeting trends; instead, you prefer to focus on things that have lasting value. Your thinking process is methodical, carefully weighing all the factors before reaching a conclusion. You rarely act impulsively, which makes others trust your judgment and value your insights.
To make the most of this Mercury placement, focus on activities that require patience and an emphasis on lasting results. Writing, art, or planning that involves creating something beautiful and enduring are ideal for you. You also excel in fields like finance, gardening, or craftsmanship, where your steady and methodical approach can shine.
Second decan (10 - 20 degrees) -- Ruled by Mercury
In the second decan of Taurus, Mercury’s influence is more pronounced, blending Taurus’ grounded nature with enhanced mental agility. You possess both practicality and intellectual curiosity, which allows you to think clearly and adapt to new information quickly. You’re particularly good at simplifying complex concepts and making them accessible to others. While your thinking is still methodical, you can also be flexible and are keen to learn, making you an excellent problem-solver.
Your communication style is clear and direct, ensuring your message is understood without unnecessary embellishments. You have a practical, no-nonsense approach that makes people trust what you say, as it’s usually based on sound reasoning and real-world experience. Abstract or overly idealistic ideas rarely interest you—you focus on what works and what can be applied in tangible ways.
To fully utilize your Mercury energy, engage in roles that combine your practical thinking with clear communication, such as teaching, writing, or working in business environments that require structured problem-solving. Anything involving analysis, planning, or creating order, like project management or education, will allow you to showcase your talents.
Third decan (20 - 30 degrees) -- Ruled by Saturn
If your Mercury falls in the third decan of Taurus, Saturn’s influence adds structure, discipline, and a deep sense of responsibility to your thinking. You approach life with a focus on long-term goals and carefully consider the steps needed to achieve stability. Your mind operates methodically, and you tend to look at situations from all angles before making a decision. You’re not easily swayed by short-term thinking—your focus is on creating lasting solutions.
When you speak, people recognize the authority and wisdom in your words. You tend to be someone others turn to for advice because they know you’ve given careful thought to the matter. You’re good at simplifying complex ideas and presenting them in a logical, easy-to-understand way, especially when it comes to long-term planning. While you may appear serious or reserved in your communication, it’s because you value precision and prefer to speak only when you have something meaningful to say.
To maximize this Mercury energy, focus on long-term projects that require patience, planning, and persistence. Whether you’re involved in business, real estate, or building a career that requires slow, steady progress, you thrive in environments where structured thinking and careful planning are needed. Fields like financial planning, architecture, or any project that requires creating a strong, enduring foundation are perfect for your disciplined mindset.
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𝐆𝐞𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐢 𝐌𝐞𝐫𝐜𝐮𝐫𝐲
First decan (0 - 10 degrees) -- Ruled by Mercury
If your Mercury is in the first decan of Gemini, you embody the pure essence of Mercury’s energy—quick, curious, and endlessly adaptable. Your mind processes information at lightning speed, and you thrive on variety and stimulation. You’re constantly juggling multiple ideas and topics, which keeps your conversations lively and engaging. Learning new things is a passion, and your inquisitive nature makes you a fantastic communicator and conversationalist.
When you speak, your words come out swiftly and articulately, often infused with wit. You have a natural talent for making connections between different ideas, which makes you an asset in any field that requires sharp communication, whether it’s writing, teaching, or public speaking. However, your fast-paced thinking can sometimes cause you to skip over details or move on to the next idea before fully finishing the previous one. Your strength lies in your adaptability, and your ability to think on your feet makes you perfect for dynamic, fast-paced environments.
To make the most of your Mercury energy, pursue activities that involve communication, learning, or networking. Writing, journalism, teaching, and public speaking will all suit your need for constant mental engagement. You’ll also thrive in roles that offer variety and flexibility, as routine can quickly become boring for your restless mind.
Second decan (10 - 20 degrees) -- Ruled by Venus
In the second decan of Gemini, Mercury’s quick thinking is blended with Venus’ influence, adding charm, grace, and diplomacy to your communication style. You’re not just a fast thinker—you’re an engaging speaker who knows how to make people feel at ease. There’s a natural flow to your words, and you often use your communication skills to build relationships and create harmony. You have a unique ability to make complex ideas sound appealing and accessible, which makes you excellent at teaching, writing, or public relations.
While your mind is still quick and adaptable, you’re more considerate of how your words are received by others. You avoid harshness in your speech and prefer conversations that are pleasant and cooperative. Venus also brings creativity to your thinking, making you excellent in fields that blend intellect with artistry, such as writing, music, or any form of creative expression that involves communication.
To fully utilize your Mercury energy, focus on activities that combine intellect and charm. Public relations, marketing, writing, and creative fields that involve communication and relationship-building are ideal for you. You shine in situations where you can use your words to bring people together and foster understanding.
Third decan (20 - 30 degrees) -- Ruled by Uranus
If your Mercury falls in the third decan of Gemini, Uranus’ influence brings an innovative, unconventional edge to your thinking. You’re not just a quick thinker—you’re a visionary, capable of seeing the future and breaking boundaries with your ideas. Your mind is drawn to original concepts, and you’re great at spotting patterns and making connections that others might overlook. This decan gives you a rebellious streak when it comes to communication, as you enjoy pushing the limits of traditional methods and exploring new ways to share information.
When you speak, your words often have a surprising or quirky quality, catching others off guard with your insights or unconventional ideas. You’re not afraid to challenge the status quo, and your communication style can be both inspiring and revolutionary. However, your rapid mental shifts and unorthodox style can sometimes make you seem unpredictable or difficult to follow, especially to those who prefer more traditional ways of thinking.
To best harness your Mercury energy, engage in activities that allow you to explore new ideas and challenge conventional wisdom. Technology, media, innovation, and any field that embraces future-forward thinking will be ideal for you. You thrive in environments where you can experiment with new concepts, so roles that involve invention, creative problem-solving, or research will allow your visionary mind to shine.
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𝐂𝐚𝐧𝐜𝐞𝐫 𝐌𝐞𝐫𝐜𝐮𝐫𝐲
First decan (0 - 10 degrees) -- Ruled by the Moon
If your Mercury is in the first decan of Cancer, your thoughts and communication are deeply tied to your emotions, influenced strongly by the Moon. You process information with a strong intuitive sense, often relying on how things make you feel rather than just logic. Your mind works in a nurturing and reflective way, and you tend to consider the emotional impact of your words on others before you speak. You have an excellent memory, especially when it comes to emotionally charged or personal experiences, and you recall even the smallest details that hold sentimental value.
When you communicate, you do so with a sense of care and empathy. You instinctively know what to say to make others feel understood and emotionally supported. However, because your emotions and thoughts are so intertwined, it can be hard for you to maintain objectivity in emotionally intense situations.
To make the most of this Mercury energy, engage in activities that require nurturing communication or emotional connection. Writing, counseling, or any profession that involves helping others and using empathy will suit you well. Your ability to connect with others on an emotional level makes you a natural in roles that require compassion and understanding.
Second decan (10 - 20 degrees) -- Ruled by Pluto
With Mercury in the second decan of Cancer, Pluto’s influence adds emotional depth and intensity to your thought process. You’re highly intuitive and perceptive, often able to sense the underlying motivations in people’s actions and conversations. Your thinking is investigative, and you’re drawn to uncovering hidden truths or exploring emotional complexities. When you speak, your words carry weight and emotional intensity, often leaving a deep impression on those around you.
You’re not one to shy away from difficult topics or deep emotional discussions. You prefer conversations that provoke transformation or meaningful change. This desire for depth and understanding can make you an excellent problem-solver, though it can also lead to becoming overly fixated on certain thoughts or emotions.
To best utilize this Mercury energy, focus on roles that allow for emotional exploration and transformation. You would excel in fields like psychology, counseling, investigative work, or any area that involves digging deep into emotional or psychological matters. Your ability to perceive and communicate hidden truths makes you a natural healer or guide in transformative processes.
Third decan (20 - 30 degrees) -- Ruled by Neptune
If your Mercury is in the third decan of Cancer, Neptune’s influence brings a dreamy, imaginative quality to your thoughts and communication. You’re highly intuitive, and your thinking often drifts into creative, spiritual, or abstract realms. There’s a poetic, almost mystical quality to how you express yourself, and your words are often filled with emotional depth that draws people in. You think in terms of feelings, symbols, and visions rather than hard facts, making you naturally inclined towards artistic or spiritual pursuits.
However, this imaginative thinking can sometimes lead to difficulties in staying focused on practical matters or communicating in a clear, organized way. You may find it challenging to stick to facts or be concise, as your mind prefers to explore emotional and spiritual nuances.
To harness this Mercury energy, engage in creative or spiritual activities that allow your imagination to flourish. Writing, art, music, or any form of creative expression that taps into your deep emotional and intuitive side will help you thrive. Your empathy and imagination make you a natural in fields such as the creative arts, spiritual healing, or roles that require emotional sensitivity and compassion.
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𝐋𝐞𝐨 𝐌𝐞𝐫𝐜𝐮𝐫𝐲
First decan (0 - 10 degrees) -- Ruled by the Sun
If your Mercury is in the first decan of Leo, the Sun’s influence gives your communication style a confident, charismatic, and vibrant edge. You think big and express yourself with a flair for the dramatic, often seeking to be seen and heard. Your thoughts are fueled by creativity and leadership, and you're drawn to ambitious ideas that inspire others. You’re not one to shy away from bold statements or grand visions—you want your words to make an impact.
When you speak, there’s an undeniable authority and warmth in your voice, making others naturally gravitate toward you. You communicate with enthusiasm and a sense of self-assurance, often commanding attention effortlessly. However, because you prefer bold strokes, you may sometimes overlook finer details or dismiss opposing views that don’t align with your vision. You pride yourself on expressing your unique thoughts and insights, and sharing your ideas is something you relish.
To fully utilize your Mercury energy, engage in roles where you can lead and express yourself. Public speaking, creative writing, or any position that places you in the spotlight will allow you to shine. You excel when you can inspire others through your ideas, making leadership and motivational roles ideal for you.
Second decan (10 - 20 degrees) -- Ruled by the Jupiter
With Mercury in the second decan of Leo, Jupiter’s influence adds a sense of expansiveness and generosity to your communication style. You're not only confident but also eager to share wisdom, ideas, and knowledge with others. You love exploring big-picture concepts, whether related to philosophy, education, or personal growth, and your enthusiasm is contagious.
When you speak, you do so with optimism and vision, often inspiring those around you. People are drawn to your words because of the uplifting and expansive nature of your ideas. You’re always thinking about how things can grow and improve, but this grand-scale thinking sometimes causes you to overlook smaller details or practical matters. You’re much more focused on the larger themes and concepts.
To make the most of your Mercury energy, seek out activities where you can teach, motivate, or share knowledge. Public speaking, coaching, or working in education are excellent outlets for your big-picture thinking. You thrive when you can inspire others with your visionary ideas and help them see the world in a broader, more optimistic light.
Third decan (20 - 30 degrees) -- Ruled by the Mars
If your Mercury is in the third decan of Leo, Mars’ influence adds drive, assertiveness, and a passionate energy to your communication style. You think and speak with urgency and conviction, and you're not afraid to voice your opinions boldly. You prefer action-oriented thinking and are quick to translate ideas into action, often leading with your words and pushing others to follow.
When you communicate, there's a fiery, dynamic quality to your speech, and people are often energized by your enthusiasm. You speak with purpose, and your words carry a sense of urgency that can be highly motivating. However, your direct approach can sometimes come across as a bit too forceful or domineering, especially when dealing with those who prefer a more measured pace or style.
To harness this Mercury energy, focus on activities that allow you to take bold action with your ideas. Competitive environments, leadership roles, or careers that require quick thinking and assertive communication will suit you well. You excel when you can channel your passion into action, making you a natural motivator and leader in high-energy situations.
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𝐕𝐢𝐫𝐠𝐨 𝐌𝐞𝐫𝐜𝐮𝐫𝐲
First decan (0 - 10 degrees) -- Ruled by Mercury
If your Mercury is in the first decan of Virgo, your mind functions with razor-sharp precision and clarity, thanks to Mercury’s full influence here. You have an exceptional ability to break down complex problems into manageable parts, approaching each issue with analytical rigor. Detail-oriented and practical, you excel at organizing information and thrive in situations that require logic and structured thinking. Efficiency is key to you, and you communicate in a concise, straightforward manner, cutting out unnecessary distractions to focus on what’s important.
When you speak, your focus is on being clear, accurate, and helpful. You value correctness over embellishment, and your critical thinking skills are highly developed, allowing you to quickly spot flaws or inconsistencies. However, this strong attention to detail can sometimes make you overly critical, both of yourself and others, as you strive for perfection.
To make the most of this Mercury energy, pursue activities that require precision, analysis, and systematic thinking. Fields such as research, editing, or any role where you can improve systems or processes will be a great fit for your skills. Your talent for practical problem-solving makes you highly effective in any task requiring structure and order.
Second decan (10 - 20 degrees) -- Ruled by Saturn
In the second decan of Virgo, Saturn’s influence adds discipline and responsibility to your already structured mind. You are methodical and patient in your thinking, with a strong focus on long-term planning and practicality. Your communication style is reserved and thoughtful, and you have a gift for organizing not only your own thoughts but also the environments around you. You often feel a sense of duty toward your work, and others look to you for reliable, well-considered solutions.
When you speak, your words carry a sense of authority and gravity, and you value accuracy and careful thought. You rarely make impulsive statements, preferring to ensure that what you say is factually correct and meaningful. This disciplined mindset, however, can sometimes lead to overthinking or being overly critical, as you hold yourself to high standards.
To fully harness your Mercury energy, focus on roles that involve long-term planning, structure, and meticulous attention to detail. You thrive in project management, writing, or any profession that requires discipline and persistence. Your ability to think methodically makes you a natural leader in environments that demand responsibility and careful organization.
Third decan (20 - 30 degrees) -- Ruled by Venus
If your Mercury is in the third decan of Virgo, Venus brings a sense of refinement and creativity to your otherwise analytical thinking. While you still possess the detailed focus typical of Virgo, Venus softens your approach, adding diplomacy and an aesthetic sense to how you process information and communicate. You appreciate harmony and balance, often considering how to make ideas more appealing or how to create beauty in practical tasks.
When you communicate, there is a tactful and graceful quality to your speech. You’re able to explain complex ideas in a way that is not only clear but also pleasing to others. This Venusian influence enhances your creativity, making you particularly skilled at blending logic with beauty—whether in design, writing, or interpersonal communication.
To best use your Mercury energy, engage in activities that allow for both precision and creativity. Fields like design, art, or writing, where attention to detail is combined with an eye for aesthetics, will be ideal. Your ability to balance practicality with creativity makes you a unique and valuable contributor to any project requiring both intellect and elegance.
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𝐋𝐢𝐛𝐫𝐚 𝐌𝐞𝐫𝐜𝐮𝐫𝐲
First decan (0 - 10 degrees) -- Ruled by Venus
If your Mercury is in the first decan of Libra, ruled by Venus, your thinking and communication are marked by a desire for harmony, balance, and beauty. You are a natural diplomat, always seeking to maintain peace in conversations and find common ground between differing viewpoints. Your mind excels at seeing multiple perspectives, making you an adept problem-solver who strives for fairness and solutions that benefit everyone involved.
When you speak, your words are smooth and tactful, often designed to ease tension or foster cooperation. You have a talent for making others feel comfortable, and you carefully choose your words to avoid conflict or offense. Your speech is charming, and you aim to steer discussions towards peaceful outcomes. However, your desire to maintain harmony can sometimes make it difficult for you to make strong, decisive statements, as you are always mindful of the potential impact of your words.
To fully utilize your Mercury energy, engage in activities that require diplomacy, collaboration, and social grace. You thrive in roles such as negotiation, mediation, or public relations, where building connections and promoting harmony is key. You also do well in creative fields, like design or writing, where aesthetics and balance are important. Your ability to see both sides of an issue and create peaceful solutions makes you a natural peacemaker.
Second decan (10 - 20 degrees) -- Ruled by Uranus
In the second decan of Libra, Uranus adds a layer of innovation and originality to your thinking and communication. You enjoy exploring new ideas, challenging conventional wisdom, and thinking outside the box, particularly when it comes to issues of fairness and equality. Your mind is quick to adapt to new trends, and you often find creative ways to approach problems, bringing fresh ideas to the table.
When you speak, your words often carry a sense of excitement and originality. People are drawn to your progressive thinking and your ability to see things from new perspectives. You challenge traditional approaches but do so with respect for others' viewpoints, balancing innovation with diplomacy. Your communication style is stimulating and inclusive, making you an excellent contributor in group settings or discussions where multiple perspectives are needed.
To make the most of your Mercury energy, focus on activities that blend your creativity with your natural sense of fairness. You excel in roles related to social reform, technology, or design, where innovative thinking and collaboration are key. Your ability to push boundaries while maintaining respect for others makes you a powerful force for change in any team or community effort.
Third decan (20 - 30 degrees) -- Ruled by Mercury
If your Mercury is in the third decan of Libra, Mercury’s influence is particularly strong, sharpening your intellect and enhancing your communication skills. You are an eloquent speaker and a skilled conversationalist, particularly in areas related to fairness, beauty, and relationships. Your mind is quick and adaptable, and you have a natural ability to express your ideas in a clear, persuasive manner.
Your speech is articulate and polished, and you’re particularly adept at navigating social situations and complex conversations. You enjoy intellectual discussions and debates, but you approach them with a sense of balance and fairness, always considering the other person’s point of view. While your diplomatic nature is one of your strengths, it can sometimes make it difficult for you to take a firm stance on an issue, as you prefer to remain neutral and open-minded.
To harness your Mercury energy, engage in activities that involve intellectual exchange, communication, and social interaction. You excel in roles such as teaching, counseling, law, or any field that requires mediation and clear thinking. Your ability to navigate complex ideas with charm and precision makes you a natural leader in conversations and problem-solving situations.
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𝐒𝐜𝐨𝐫𝐩𝐢𝐨 𝐌𝐞𝐫𝐜𝐮𝐫𝐲
First decan (0 - 10 degrees) -- Ruled by Pluto
If your Mercury is in the first decan of Scorpio, Pluto's influence gives your mind an intense, focused, and probing quality. You have a natural curiosity for what lies beneath the surface and are driven to uncover hidden truths. You excel at research, investigation, and any activity that requires deep concentration and persistence. Your thinking is strategic and you rarely settle for superficial answers, making you highly effective at problem-solving.
When you communicate, your words carry depth and intensity. People sense there’s something profound in what you say, even if you don’t reveal everything outright. Your communication style is often direct and can be quite powerful, as you have a knack for cutting through superficiality and getting straight to the core of an issue. However, your intensity may sometimes make others feel exposed or uncomfortable, as you often bring to light things they might prefer to keep hidden.
To fully utilize your Mercury energy, focus on areas where investigative thinking and psychological insight are key. Fields such as research, psychology, or detective work are ideal for you. Your ability to think deeply and communicate with conviction makes you a forceful and persuasive speaker, especially in emotionally or intellectually charged discussions.
Second decan (10 - 20 degrees) -- Ruled by Neptune
In the second decan of Scorpio, Neptune’s influence brings a blend of deep intuition and imagination to your thinking and communication. Your mind is not only penetrating but also visionary, and you often navigate the world through a combination of logic and intuition. You are highly sensitive to the emotional undercurrents of any situation and may often sense things that others miss. This heightened intuition gives you a unique perspective on life, and you are drawn to subjects that delve into the mystical, spiritual, or psychological.
When you speak, there’s often an air of mystery or emotional depth to your words. You communicate in a way that touches others on a profound level, often sparking deeper emotional or spiritual insights. You are especially drawn to conversations about life’s deeper mysteries, such as the nature of existence, spirituality, and transformation. However, your tendency to rely on intuition can sometimes make your thoughts difficult for others to follow, and you may prefer to keep certain ideas or feelings private.
To harness your Mercury energy, engage in creative or spiritual pursuits that allow you to blend intellect and intuition. Writing, counseling, or any work in psychology or the arts will help you channel your deep insights. Your ability to combine emotional sensitivity with intellectual depth makes you a captivating communicator, particularly in conversations that require emotional or spiritual insight.
Third decan (20 - 30 degrees) -- Ruled by the Moon
If your Mercury is in the third decan of Scorpio, the Moon’s influence heightens your emotional awareness and sensitivity, making your thoughts and communication deeply connected to your feelings. You have a natural ability to understand both your own and others’ emotional states, which gives you profound insight into human behavior and motivations. Your thinking blends emotional intelligence with intellectual depth, and you are especially interested in understanding the emotional dynamics at play in any situation.
When you communicate, your words are infused with emotion and sensitivity. You’re drawn to emotionally charged conversations, and you often speak from a place of vulnerability and truth. People are drawn to your empathy and your ability to articulate complex emotions. However, because your thinking is so intertwined with your feelings, you may sometimes dwell on emotional wounds or find it difficult to detach from past experiences.
To make the most of your Mercury energy, focus on activities that allow you to tap into your emotional depth, such as counseling, writing, or any role that requires empathy and emotional intelligence. Your ability to communicate with emotional clarity and authenticity makes you a powerful presence in any conversation, especially when emotional support or understanding is needed.
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𝐒𝐚𝐠𝐢𝐭𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐢𝐮𝐬 𝐌𝐞𝐫𝐜𝐮𝐫𝐲
First decan (0 - 10 degrees) -- Ruled by Jupiter
If your Mercury is in the first decan of Sagittarius, ruled by Jupiter, you have a mind that craves exploration, knowledge, and growth. You’re driven by a sense of curiosity and optimism, constantly seeking to understand life’s larger truths. Whether it’s through travel, study, or philosophical debate, you thrive on expanding your horizons and pushing the boundaries of your intellect. You naturally gravitate toward big-picture thinking and enjoy pondering abstract concepts like morality, culture, and spirituality.
When you speak, your enthusiasm is contagious. Your communication style is optimistic and full of energy, making others feel excited by your ideas. You love sharing what you’ve learned with others, and your storytelling ability often brings your ideas to life in a vivid, inspiring way. However, you might sometimes skip over practical details, as your focus is more on the broader vision than on day-to-day realities. You have a tendency to be direct and forthright, which can sometimes come off as blunt, but your intent is always to motivate and inspire.
To make the most of your Mercury energy, focus on activities that allow you to expand your knowledge and share it with others. Teaching, writing, journalism, or even roles in travel or cultural exchange are ideal for you. You excel when you can communicate big ideas and inspire others to broaden their perspectives, making you a natural philosopher, teacher, or visionary thinker.
Second decan (10 - 20 degrees) -- Ruled by Mars
In the second decan of Sagittarius, Mars adds a layer of passion and drive to your already expansive mindset. You still crave knowledge and exploration, but now you approach these pursuits with a more assertive, action-oriented mindset. Your thoughts are fast-paced, and you don’t hesitate to jump into debates or discussions where you can defend your ideas with conviction. You’re naturally drawn to challenging conversations, seeing them as opportunities to refine your beliefs and take action on the causes you care about.
When you communicate, there’s an urgency to your words. You speak with passion and authority, often encouraging others to take immediate action on the ideas you discuss. People are drawn to your boldness, but your directness can sometimes come off as argumentative or confrontational, especially if you’re debating a topic you’re passionate about. You enjoy intellectual challenges and are quick to challenge others to think more deeply about their own beliefs.
To best use your Mercury energy, focus on activities that allow you to combine your intellectual curiosity with your desire to take action. Advocacy, politics, teaching, or coaching are excellent outlets for your dynamic communication style. Your ability to inspire others to move forward with passion and conviction makes you a powerful motivator, especially in environments that require leadership and a strong voice for change.
Third decan (20 - 30 degrees) -- Ruled by the Sun
If your Mercury is in the third decan of Sagittarius, the Sun’s influence brings a charismatic and confident energy to your thinking and communication. You’re not only interested in exploring big ideas and philosophical questions, but you also see yourself as a leader who can inspire others through your words. There’s a sense of personal pride in your ability to communicate, and you enjoy being seen as someone with a strong vision and the ability to motivate others toward personal growth.
When you speak, your words are infused with authority and optimism. You have a natural warmth that draws people in, and your confidence in your ideas makes others feel inspired and uplifted. You’re excellent at presenting big-picture concepts in a way that feels relatable and empowering, and you take pride in your ability to motivate and lead. However, your strong sense of self-expression can sometimes come across as overly confident or preachy, particularly if you’re deeply invested in the topic at hand.
To best harness your Mercury energy, focus on activities that allow you to take center stage and inspire others with your vision. Public speaking, teaching, leadership roles, or any field that allows you to share your knowledge and motivate others are perfect for you. Your ability to see the bigger picture and communicate it in a way that feels empowering makes you a natural leader, especially in situations that require enthusiasm, optimism, and a sense of adventure.
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𝐂𝐚𝐩𝐫𝐢𝐜𝐨𝐫𝐧 𝐌𝐞𝐫𝐜𝐮𝐫𝐲
First decan (0 - 10 degrees) -- Ruled by Saturn
If your Mercury is in the first decan of Capricorn, ruled by Saturn, your mind is focused, disciplined, and geared toward achieving practical results. You think strategically, with a strong emphasis on long-term goals and the steps needed to reach them. Patience and precision define your thought process, and you’re careful not to make decisions hastily. Your communication style is efficient, direct, and often focused on practical, real-world matters rather than abstract or theoretical concepts. You value structure and like to ensure that whatever you say or do leads to concrete outcomes.
When you speak, your words carry weight and authority, often making others take you seriously. You avoid unnecessary embellishments, preferring clear and concise language that gets straight to the point. People respect your logical, grounded approach, but sometimes you may come across as overly serious or rigid, especially in casual or spontaneous conversations. Your strength lies in your ability to think ahead and lay out plans that lead to long-term success.
To make the most of your Mercury energy, focus on activities that require structure, organization, and strategic planning. You excel in roles like business, law, project management, or anything that involves long-term planning and responsibility. Your ability to communicate with authority and a clear, practical mindset makes you a natural leader in environments that prioritize efficiency and results.
Second decan (10 - 20 degrees) -- Ruled by Venus
In the second decan of Capricorn, Venus adds a layer of charm, diplomacy, and refinement to your disciplined thinking. While you still value practicality and structure, you have a way of softening your communication style to appeal to others’ emotions and sense of aesthetics. You’re thoughtful in your approach, balancing your goal-oriented mindset with an awareness of how your words and actions impact others. This makes you not only strategic but also tactful, which is a great asset in social or professional negotiations.
When you speak, you do so with elegance and grace. You understand how to blend logic with persuasion, making you an effective communicator, particularly in situations that require diplomacy. You can navigate tough conversations with ease, offering solutions that satisfy both practical and emotional needs. However, because you value appearances and harmony, you might sometimes gloss over deeper emotional issues in favor of maintaining balance.
To fully utilize your Mercury energy, focus on activities that allow you to combine your practical mindset with a sense of diplomacy and style. You excel in fields like marketing, management, design, or any role where strategy and aesthetics intersect. Your ability to think practically while communicating with grace and tact makes you well-suited for roles that require both intelligence and charm.
Third decan (20 - 30 degrees) -- Ruled by Mercury
If your Mercury is in the third decan of Capricorn, Mercury’s influence sharpens your intellect and enhances your analytical abilities. Your mind is highly organized and efficient, capable of breaking down complex problems into logical, step-by-step solutions. You think systematically and are always focused on how to achieve the most practical and productive outcomes. Your communication is straightforward and precise—you prefer to get to the heart of the matter without wasting time on unnecessary details.
When you speak, your words are clear and to the point, and you have a knack for explaining difficult concepts in simple terms. You’re highly focused on logic and results, which makes you an excellent problem-solver in any situation. However, your emphasis on practicality and efficiency can sometimes make you appear detached or overly focused on the task at hand, which may lead to neglecting emotional or creative considerations.
To best harness your Mercury energy, focus on activities that involve problem-solving, analysis, and structured communication. You excel in fields like engineering, finance, law, or consulting, where logical thinking and precision are highly valued. Your ability to streamline complex ideas and communicate them effectively makes you an asset in any environment that requires clear thinking and careful planning.
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𝐀𝐪𝐮𝐚𝐫𝐢𝐮𝐬 𝐌𝐞𝐫𝐜𝐮𝐫𝐲
First decan (0 - 10 degrees) -- Ruled by Uranus
If your Mercury is in the first decan of Aquarius, ruled by Uranus, your mind is highly inventive and unconventional. You have a natural talent for thinking outside the box and thrive on exploring new, cutting-edge ideas. You're intellectually curious, drawn to innovation and progress, and always looking toward the future. Your thinking is abstract, visionary, and often ahead of its time. You enjoy analyzing problems from unique angles and are often excited by challenges that require creative solutions.
When you speak, your words are infused with originality and a forward-thinking energy. You're great at discussing concepts that push boundaries, and you enjoy surprising others with your fresh insights. People appreciate your ability to spark innovative discussions, though your focus on intellectual matters may sometimes make you seem detached from more personal or emotional topics.
To best utilize your Mercury energy, engage in activities that involve innovation, technology, or social reform. You excel in fields that allow you to explore futuristic ideas and challenge conventional wisdom, such as technology, science, or activism. Your ability to think far beyond the present makes you a natural leader in any area that values progress and originality.
Second decan (10 - 20 degrees) -- Ruled by Mercury
In the second decan of Aquarius, Mercury's influence sharpens your intellectual abilities, making you an exceptionally quick and analytical thinker. You have a natural curiosity about the world, and you're always seeking out new information and ways to process it. Your mind is logical, objective, and versatile, and you excel at communicating complex ideas in simple, understandable terms. You’re skilled at finding patterns and connections that others may miss, making you an insightful problem-solver.
When you speak, your words are clear, concise, and often thought-provoking. You enjoy discussing a wide range of topics and are great at sparking intellectual debates. Your ability to see multiple perspectives allows you to contribute valuable insights to group discussions, though your strong focus on logic can sometimes make you appear detached or less emotionally engaged.
To fully harness your Mercury energy, focus on activities that require quick thinking, analysis, and effective communication. You thrive in roles like teaching, writing, research, or technology, where your ability to synthesize information and share it with others is highly valued. Your sharp intellect and versatility make you a great fit for positions that involve problem-solving and intellectual exploration.
Third decan (20 - 30 degrees) -- Ruled by Venus
If your Mercury is in the third decan of Aquarius, Venus brings a sense of creativity, beauty, and social grace to your communication style. While you still maintain the intellectual brilliance and forward-thinking qualities of Mercury in Aquarius, Venus adds an element of charm and diplomacy to how you express yourself. You're not just interested in new ideas—you also want to find ways to connect people through those ideas, often blending intellect with creativity to inspire others.
When you speak, there's a smooth, engaging quality to your words. You enjoy discussing complex ideas in a way that is both accessible and enjoyable for others, and you're great at making intellectual conversations feel fun and appealing. People are drawn to your blend of intelligence and social charm, though you may sometimes prioritize harmony and social connection over diving deeply into more challenging or abstract concepts.
To best use your Mercury energy, focus on activities that allow you to combine creativity with intellectual pursuits. You thrive in fields like design, the arts, social reform, or any area where you can apply your visionary thinking to improve society or create beauty. Your ability to think originally while maintaining a sense of balance and charm makes you a natural fit for roles that require both innovation and social connection.
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𝐏𝐢𝐬𝐜𝐞𝐬 𝐌𝐞𝐫𝐜𝐮𝐫𝐲
First decan (0 - 10 degrees) -- Ruled by Neptune
If your Mercury is in the first decan of Pisces, ruled by Neptune, your mind is fluid, intuitive, and deeply imaginative. You think in terms of emotions and abstract ideas, often perceiving things in ways that others might not immediately understand. Your thoughts tend to drift towards the mystical, creative, and spiritual realms, making you highly attuned to subtleties and nuances that others might miss. Rather than focusing on hard facts, you interpret the world through feelings and sensations, giving your communication a poetic, dreamy quality.
When you speak, you have a natural ability to convey deep emotions and complex ideas in a way that resonates with others on a heartfelt level. People are often drawn to the sensitivity and depth of your words, and you can soothe or inspire them with your empathetic and compassionate nature. However, because your thoughts are so connected to your emotions, you may sometimes struggle to articulate your ideas clearly or stay grounded in practical details.
To best use your Mercury energy, focus on creative or spiritual pursuits where your imagination and empathy can shine. Fields like writing, music, art, or healing practices that require an intuitive approach are perfect for you. Your gift for communicating abstract concepts in an emotionally resonant way makes you a natural in roles that involve emotional connection and creative expression.
Second decan (10 - 20 degrees) -- Ruled by the Moon
In the second decan of Pisces, the Moon’s influence adds even more emotional sensitivity and introspection to your thinking and communication style. Your mind is reflective, intuitive, and deeply in touch with the feelings of those around you. You process information through an emotional lens, making you particularly skilled at understanding the needs and moods of others. You are a natural nurturer, and your thoughts often gravitate toward how you can help or care for the people in your life.
When you communicate, your words are gentle, comforting, and full of empathy. You have a way of making others feel heard and supported, and people often turn to you when they need emotional guidance. However, your strong connection to your emotions can sometimes make it difficult for you to remain objective or detached in conversations, especially when feelings are involved. You may also find that you are easily affected by the emotional states of others, which can sometimes lead to overwhelm.
To make the most of your Mercury energy, focus on activities that allow you to provide emotional support or care for others. Counseling, therapy, or any field where emotional intelligence is key would be ideal for you. Your ability to communicate with kindness and understanding makes you a valuable asset in any role that requires empathy and nurturing.
Third decan (20 - 30 degrees) -- Ruled by Pluto
If your Mercury is in the third decan of Pisces, Mars adds a subtle drive and assertiveness to your typically gentle and emotionally intuitive communication style. While you still possess the dreamy, imaginative qualities of Mercury in Pisces, Mars gives you a stronger sense of purpose and the motivation to act on your ideas. You are not just content to dream; you want to turn your visions into reality, especially when they are connected to something you are passionate about. Your thinking is driven by both your emotions and a desire to take action on those feelings.
When you speak, your words carry more conviction and passion than the typical Mercury in Pisces. You are able to express your emotions with intensity, and you aren’t afraid to stand up for what you believe in or advocate for those you care about. There’s a fire behind your words that can make you a powerful communicator, particularly when it comes to issues that stir your emotions. However, your emotional intensity can sometimes lead to impulsive or reactive communication, especially when you feel strongly about something.
To best use your Mercury energy, engage in activities that combine emotional depth with action. You excel in roles where you can channel your passion into helping or inspiring others, such as activism, teaching, or any work that involves motivating people. Your ability to communicate with both sensitivity and strength makes you a natural advocate for causes or people that are close to your heart.
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Masterlist - YouTube (subliminals)
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vivelegalite · 4 months
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dear dead boy detective (especially paynland) enjoyers: have you yet heard of the biggest gift bestowed upon the fandom so far, aka jayden's charles playlist? the one he mentioned in interviews? well, he dropped it on twitter at 19th of may. and man, do i have stuff to say about it.
there's a lot of 80's bangers, for sure, great to get into the mood and character, but some of the choices...
i'm gonna focus on a few of my favourites, songs that made me go insane when i saw them. honorable mentions: - category 1 (so devoted the lines blur): ain't no mountain high enough by marvin gaye and tammi terrell, there is a light that never goes out by the smiths, inkpot gods by the amazing devil - category 2 (family life): family line and summer child by conan gray, seventeen going under by sam fender, matilda by harry styles, father by the front bottoms - category 3 (being queer in the 80s): smalltown boy by bronski beat, boys don't cry by the cure - category 4 (there's no heterosexual explanation for this one): good luck, babe! by chappel roan, yellow by coldplay, fight or flight by conan gray (is this about monty? the cat king? i need answers!), the prophecy by taylor swift, arms tonite by mother mother, sweet by cigarettes after sex, head over heels by tears for fears
this list is by no means complete or comprehensive!
and now, the songs that made me go the craziest: (they're predominantly in charles' pov as it's his playlist)
found heaven by conan gray
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the only reason this song made it into the list and not the honorable mentions instead of smalltown boy is that it makes almost the same point, just so much more explicitly. i don't think i have to say much about it, it's a story of a young person griping with their queerness, being forced to leave home, a common theme of the playlist. "you're in love, you found heaven" when he chose edwin over his own afterlife, heavily implied to be heaven, and built his heaven with him on the mortal plane? ouch! (and we see this same notion repeated in another bop from the playlist, heaven is a place on earth by belinda carlisle).
2. like real people do by hozier
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"i miss kissing" charles rowland, 202X romantic meaning aside, the verses show a sort of a common understanding the boys have around the manner of their deaths and their lives before it. we already know from the show they don't really talk about it, with edwin not knowing about the severity of the abuse charles suffered. it feels like one of them saying "let the past be past, we're together now, yeah?". but also, jayden: can there ever be a platonic explanation for this? ghosts can't touch, can't feel, so they wish they could just kiss like "real" (alive?) people do?
3. flaws by bastille
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not the most romantic song, but i absolutely love how well it fits their dynamic. despite his edwardian brand of repression, edwin truly is the one that's more open about his feelings (recognising of course that in this case, the bar is so low it's in hell. haha, get it). edwin has worn his flaws upon his sleeve, and charles has held them buried - eg. bottling up all of his anger and resentment towards his family and his own death. the song presents a very sweet outlook, in which their flaws are brought up to the surface (for example, charles' outburst against the night nurse in episode 4), but they learn to accept them as they are, an extension of themselves.
4. a pearl by mitski
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you know it's gonna get intense if there's a mitski song in the mix.
the song is about a person who finds love in their partner, someone who treats them way better than they've ever been treated - and yet they cannot bring themselves to reciprocate the affection ("it's not that i don't want you, sorry i can't take your touch") despite reciprocating the feelings themselves because of the trauma. charles is known to bottle things up ("you're growing tired of me and all the things i don't talk about"). the person in the song recognises the love the other person holds for them ("you love me so hard and i still can't sleep"), which reminds me of charles' response to edwin's confession. not a "no", but a "maybe, as time passes".
5. fair by the amazing devil
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this one made me genuinely gasp when i first delved into the lyrics. it's simply so sweet, such a genuine and domestic portrayal of love. at first i thought it was way too open about being a love song (normal text instead of the subtext i'd be used to) for jayden to choose it with edwin in mind, but... there's no one else it can really be about. it's far too domestic, too "established" to refer to crystal. refers to a relationship that's laster for a longer while.
the narrator in the first verse is a person deeply in love with the other person, someone who loves to make his lover laugh and simply drinks in their presence. the "he" in the song i believe is charles, while the "she" refers to edwin. edwin promises to fight off anyone - or any feelings pulling charles down (we can see this in the first episode: "you ever think... what if death did catch us? she'd force us to go to the afterlife and split up" "i will make sure this never happens."). charles feels left behind by the world (seeing as he clings to crystal at first, refering to her as "someone their age who's still alive") and believes edwin to be so much stronger than he's ever been. i'm not going to break down the song verse by verse, but if you read it yourself while subbing out "he" for charles and "she" for edwin you'll see just how sweet (and... strangely very in character?) the song is.
6. work song by hozier
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if the previous song made me gasp when i saw the lyrics, this one made me go "NO WAY" out loud when i saw the title. the first one verse is just pure toothrotting sweetness, but the chorus is what i want to draw attention to:
when my time comes around lay me gently in the cold, dark earth no grave can hold my body down i'll crawl home to her
HELLO? charles, who keeps escaping death and afterlife to be able to stay with edwin? charles, as he literally takes his last breath with edwin right there, choosing to be by his side rather than move on? charles, who keeps choosing him despite night nurse's promises and threats? charles, who literally crawled through hell for him?
verse 2, to me, can be interpreted as referring to when charles died. edwin found him at his worst, and he "woke" up with his presence comforting him. he was shivering due to hypothermia and his injuries. edwin didn't ask him about what happened or pushed him, he simply listened. the lines "i didn't care much how long i lived, but I swear, i thought i dreamed her" are pretty self explanatory.
in verse 3 we still see the same attitude of "damn the afterlife, at least we have each other" as charles portrays througout the series. they're free, and heaven and hell are simply words to him.
7. orpheus by vincent lima
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i literally have no words for this one. it fits too well. if you want commentary for this one, just... i don't know, rewatch the staircase scene.
8. francesca by hozier
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(cracks knuckles) this is the big one. the album francesca is from, unreal unearth, is based on dante alighieri's divine comedy, a fourteenth century poem about a man venturing into hell, purgatory and eventually heaven. the eponymous francesca is one francesca di rimini, a woman who was politically married off to a man older than her, called giovanni malatesta. francesca didn't love him, and eventually fell deep in love with giovanni's younger brother, paolo. the two carried on with the affair for years, before being murdered by giovanni upon his finding out. francesca and paolo are mentioned in canto v of the first book, inferno, as two souls damned in the second circle of hell, lust. their punishment is to be permanently locked in a hurricane, swept away by the winds the moment they manage to get close enough to touch one another.
as opposed to their portrayal in the poem, the song is from the perspective of paolo, explaining that no matter the punishment, he wouldn't change anything about his life because he got to know, and love, francesca.
the first verse brings to mind the scenes in hell, especially on the staircase ("do you think I'd give up? that this might've shook the love from me? or that I was on the brink? how could you think, darlin', i'd scare so easily?" as an echo of charles' "sorry. no version of this where i didn't come get you"). "my life was a storm since i was born, how could i fear any hurricane?" could relate to charles' tumultuous family life, an assurance that nothing he has to deal with while by edwin's side will faze him given the things he's lived through. no, despite everything he's suffered through, charles wouldn't do anything differently - because his (admittedly shitty) life led him to edwin ("i'd tell them, put me back in"). we already know charles would choose him over heaven, willingly sacrificing his own afterlife to stay with a boy he's known for hours, someone kind enough to keep him company as he drew his final breath. all of it - his father's abuse, his schoolmates' bigotry, the pain of his own death, as well as everything he's gone through since - he'd do it all again, for edwin.
"for all that was said of where we'd end up at the end of it" could be taken as an allusion to the fate the boys would meet at "at the end of it", when they're finally caught by death and separated, or as more of a general "if you sin, you will go to hell when you die" (up to you to decide what the sin itself would be - an interpretation that would work with other songs on the playlist is that one such sin would be same sex attraction). then their hearts ceased, they never knew "peace", nor did they want to find it in death. their deaths were too soon, them being ripped away from life, but even though it would break his heart: charles would ask to do it all again.
the outro, i think, beautifully pulls it all together: heaven is not fit to house a love like theirs.
to wrap it all up:
jayden, what were you cooking in there? what do you know??
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fishnapple · 1 month
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THE MAP TO YOUR SOUL, YOUR DEEPEST SELF INSIDE
A simple map to help you find who you really are inside. The reading will have 4 parts: the focus, the obstacle, the gift, the guide.
This is a general reading meant for multiple people. Take only what resonates and leave out the rest.
Your feedback is much appreciated. If you find the reading resonated with you, leave a comment, I’d love to know 🎐
About me | Masterpost Book a reading with me - KO-FI (→ personal reading)
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CUBE 1
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The focus: Balancing opposites
It's very straightforward and direct. Your deepest self yearns to express itself openly, without masks or veils. You will find authenticity through the words you say and the beauty you cultivate. Your identity is not meant to stay in one place, stagnating but to constantly evolve, transform and refine. This can be expressed through your thoughts, your physical appearance, as within so without. Kind words and self-love go a long way. You're here to learn the way of being independent, of self-authority, standing up for yourself without being selfish.
Life's various responsibilities, the burden of being and existing, the confusions of bonds. Those are the forces that pull you in many directions, away from a simple truth: yourself, the one you've built, the one you are, the one you want to be. The moment you can be at peace with yourself will be the moment you've arrived at home, inside you.
The obstacle: You tend to lose yourself in the connections with other people. The sense of self is dissolved by the desire to connect with the other person. You might find yourself morphed into various identities with each connection. You're one person in one relationship, but you're a different person in another relationship. Relationships shape your identities. There would be a point when you're confused about who you really are, without other people. This is a challenge for you, to find your sense of self outside the connections with people. To have a stable core no matter what relationship you're in.
The gift: Your obstacle is also one of your gifts. You have the talent to connect and understand people. Navigating relationship dynamics come naturally for you. Negotiating, harmonising, understanding. So use this gift to understand yourself too. To see yourself, standing alone, independently and connect with that person. You can be with other people without sacrificing your autonomy and independence.
The guide: Find out what can spark your joy and what makes you want to act, what are you wishing for. Write them down and see the pattern, the interconnection between them. The fastest and safest path to your soul is to constantly seek expansion of your mind. If you're feeling lost, trust in your intuition and the signs given to you at the present moment. You heard someone mentioned a book, a movie, a place? You suddenly get a desire to learn something? You might want to note them down and try them for yourself. Hidden treasures of knowledge are always just around the corner. And through these seemingly random encounters, you've already been treading on the path to your soul.
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CUBE 2
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The focus: Freedom of creativity & uniqueness
You have a powerful presence that can touch people in a subconscious way. There's a light, a force that is constantly swirling, rolling, unfolding. The question is, how can that light exist among the sea of people without blinding others or without dimming itself? A star is bright and blinding when someone looks at it alone and closely, a star is also bright but its light is gentle and it dances on the cosmic tapestry when it exists together with other million stars on the sky. Together, they create a picture of the universe in harmony.
The path to your soul is not a lonely path that you go alone, it's a merry one with people from all different corners of the world going together, some will go away after a while, some will stay with you till the end of the journey. You will find yourself in the crowd, in the people around you, in the distant dream for an ideal world. How do you connect with people without fusing yourself with them? How do you stand apart but still be a part of something? How do you give to the world and grow in the process?
The obstacle: There's a hidden fear inside you. It's about the loss of the self, the disappearing into the mass. Order, stability and the concrete are desired. You have a lot of hidden force within you. If repressed, it can result in general resentment and anger directed at the world at large with no particular target.
Struggling to find motivation can also be a big obstacle. You need to find the roots of that struggle. Is it because it's hard to be motivated when you can't find the meaning for it? It's hard to act when you can't see the direction ahead clearly? Everything needs a meaning and a purpose. Without them, mobilising your incredible pool of energy will be difficult.
The gift: You have the gift of creativity, creating things for the world and creating your own self. You're like a sun that gives life and shines brightly. Expressing your individuality is an impulse that cannot be overridden. So wherever you go, people notice you, they will applaud you light. use this gift to bring light into other's life, help them find the courage to shine brightly like yourself.
The guide: Delve into the realm of your fears and the unknown. The more clearly you see them, the calmer it will feel. Embrace the mystical parts of life. There are certain things that can't be completely understood by just sitting down and thinking about them in practical terms. Sometimes, letting go and just observing is more effective.
There is a connection between the path you choose to go and the influences of the collective. No matter how much you deny those influences, they are still there, lying dormant in your deeper self. It's the force that keeps you connected to everyone, the sense of belonging. If you have the desire to stand apart, to not be drowned in the sea of the collective, understand that you have enough power and strength to swim gracefully alongside others.
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CUBE 3
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The focus: The lightness and feeling of safety
Building a home for yourself, for your soul, is what you're called to do. I see the image of someone dragging their feet through a storm, they are exhausted, all they're searching for is a shelter, a place for warmth and rest, a place to stop their weary feet. The burdens of life weigh heavily on your shoulders. There might be a time when you want to escape, to let go, that's when you need to grasp at something to anchor yourself back to the reality of life. Life can be heavy and demanding, but you can navigate it in a simple and calm manner. You may have dreams you want to fulfil, aspirations to achieve, big things to expect but at the end of the day, a safe place, a calm mind and a rested body maybe are all you really need. There's a need to strip back to simplicity and find enjoyment in your own world.
The obstacle: You might project a certain assertiveness and a competitive image to the world. But it's a cover to hide your deeper feeling. The more vulnerable you feel, the harder you tend to fight. The more confused you're about your own self, the more likely you're to chase worldly achievements without a real sense of satisfaction. This discrepancy between your inner self and your outer self will hinder your sense of peace. There's a need to find a way to communicate yourself clearer, with more coherence to the story.
The gift: You have the gift of the gab, expressing ideas and convincing other people. Your mind works in a lightning fast manner, gears constantly turning, information flows indefinitely, ideas churned out like a blinking light. You understand things instinctively, sometimes making logical leaps to arrive at the answer, making mental shortcuts. This gift can help you sail through life more smoothly and help you get out of sticky situations, which usually are the results of your expression of assertiveness or anger.
The guide: Taking small steps towards your soul in a slow and steady manner. No need to rush and worry all the time. Everything is built from the culmination of small efforts.
You will find the guiding arrows through listening to your body, to feel the concrete body of yours, the pains that arise in different place, the warmth feeling in the stomach, the hands getting cold, the electricity running through your spine, all those sensations. Don't ignore them. They help you to feel more alive, and they call you to take more care of your body. Without a healthy body, how can you live and go after your goals?
Humility is another guiding arrow. No matter how much knowledge and wisdom you have, there's always something to learn from others, assume the role of a student and try to listen. Challenges might only appear when you refuse to open your mind and learn.
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CUBE 4
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The focus: the potentials of transformation
I see the image of someone standing from afar, looking tentatively at the vista before them. They want to go towards it, to see for themselves is there a deeper wonder to this life that they haven't known of. The call is ever louder and more tempting each day.
There's still a distance between them and the vista, but they are looking in the right direction. Now, they just need to figure out how to close the distance. They need the courage to take the first step. They can see the rewards, they can also see the hardship. But turning away is not an option anymore. There's so much more to see, so much potential to grow.
The obstacle: I think deep down, you've already figured out the path you need to go, you just need a little nudge because of the uneasiness in knowing what needs to be done to go towards that path. It will require changes, it will require you to discard things you might have held dear in the past but are no longer serving your growth. And it all starts from the mind. You might not like to think too much about the future, the bigger plan for your life, prefer to stay in the details of your surroundings. Maybe you feel that it's never enough, you don't have enough experiences or skill, you don't have enough resources, you don't have enough visions. Which is not true. You are ready to take the plunge, much like the Fool in the Tarot.
The gift: You already have an instinctive understanding of the world around you. Learning comes naturally for you. Your deposit at the bank of knowledge is getting larger everyday and will spill over if you don't use them. The door that can lead you to the path forward is your mind. Use your mental energy to figure out the steps instead of over analysing and excessive worrying.
Putting your voice out into the world, make a statement, make a commitment to your goal, and you will be surprised how far it can take you.
The guide: If you feel overwhelmed by the amount of work that needs to be done in order to have the life you want deep down. Start small and build steadily. The word "transformation" may sound dramatic and scary, but micro-transformations happen at every moment. Grab hold of the visions floating in your heart and mind and hold them steady, study them, don't mystify them, bring them out into the mundane by backtracking the steps leading to them. You see the farthest step, then backtrack until you arrive at where you are now. Start with doable things, and gradually, you will find that a lot more are doable for you.
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bahislionaaagiris · 3 days
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How to Achieve Endless Happiness
The pursuit of endless happiness is something many people strive for, but true, lasting happiness doesn’t come from material possessions or external achievements. Instead, it’s a state of mind that can be cultivated through inner peace and mindful living. Here are some key principles for achieving endless happiness:
Practice Gratitude Gratitude shifts your focus from what you lack to what you have. By appreciating the little things in life, you train your mind to focus on positivity. Each day, take time to reflect on what you are grateful for—this simple practice can have a profound impact on your overall happiness.
Live in the Present One of the main reasons people feel unhappy is that they dwell on the past or worry about the future. Endless happiness can only be found in the present moment. Mindfulness practices like meditation and deep breathing help bring your attention to the now, allowing you to fully experience life as it happens.
Cultivate Positive Relationships Strong, meaningful connections with others are a key factor in long-term happiness. Surround yourself with supportive, positive people who encourage and inspire you. Building deep bonds and fostering empathy not only creates happiness for yourself but also for those around you.
Give Without Expecting Acts of kindness and generosity lead to a deep sense of fulfillment. When you help others without expecting anything in return, you tap into a natural source of joy. Giving can take many forms—whether it’s your time, energy, or resources—and it helps to create a sense of purpose and connection.
Embrace Imperfection True happiness doesn’t come from perfection but from accepting life as it is. Challenges, mistakes, and setbacks are inevitable, but how you respond to them determines your happiness. By embracing imperfection, you reduce unnecessary stress and open yourself to growth and learning.
Align Your Life with Your Values Happiness grows when your actions align with your deepest values and beliefs. Pursue what truly matters to you—whether that’s creativity, family, helping others, or personal growth. Living authentically and with purpose leads to a deeper sense of fulfillment and lasting joy.
Endless happiness isn’t about constantly feeling pleasure or avoiding pain. It’s about creating a mindset that allows you to find peace, meaning, and joy regardless of external circumstances. By cultivating these habits and attitudes, you can nurture a deep, enduring happiness in your life. Like Bahislion
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ahqkas · 3 months
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theo with a gf who is just naturally quiet and zones out 24/7.She doesnt even do it purposefully it just happens,and doesnt relaise when people try to get her attention or are speaking to her.She barely talks,mostly to theo,whos her voice but sometimes she zones out when hes talking and he has to bring her back
© ahqkas — all rights reserved. even when credited, these works are prohibited to be reposted, translated or modified
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THEO HAD ALWAYS FOUND A CERTAIN CHARM IN YOUR QUIET NATURE, a calm amidst the storm of chaos in the world around him. your natural tendency to zone out, to drift away into your own thoughts, was something he had grown accustomed to. he had learned to recognize the distant look in your eyes, the subtle way your focus would slip away from the present moment. and he was completely okay with it.
one rainy afternoon, you both sat by the black lake, the sun hidden behind a bunch of dark clouds as the two of you were nestled under a large umbrella, watching the droplets melt in the lake water. theo was talking about a book he had been currently reading, his voice full with enthusiasm.
“it’s one of shakespeare’s most famous tragedies. it’s about a prince who’s dealing with a lot of grief and anger after his father’s death,” theo paused, glancing over at you to make sure you were following. “his mother, gertrude, marries his uncle claudius really soon after the king’s death. and hamlet, well, he’s not too happy about it.”
you nodded, captivated by the way theo's voice seemed to bring the centuries-old text to life. "he's kind of stuck in this existential crisis," your boyfriend continued, "wondering about life and death, what it all means, you know? there's this famous line, 'to be or not to be, that is the question.' hamlet is contemplating suicide with that, weighing the pain of life against the fear of the unknown after death. i think it has some of truth in it.” the intensity in theo's eyes made it clear how deeply he connected with the story. "it's not just about revenge," he said, leaning in slightly. "it's about his struggle with his own mind. he feigns madness to uncover the truth about his father's death, and in doing so, he spirals into a real state of confusion and despair."
he paused, a small smile playing on his lips. "i've been reading it over and over, trying to understand all the layers. every time i think i've got a handle on it, something new jumps out at me. it's like a puzzle, and i love trying to piece it all together."
the slytherin glanced over at you, only to find that familiar, far-off look in your eyes. you were staring out at the lake, completely lost in your thoughts, the world around you fading into the background, thanks to the sound of rain and theo’s calming voice.
“hey, love,” theo smiled softly at you while to took your hand into his, giving it a little squeeze. “you still there with me?”
you blinked, your focus slowly returning back to the present. your eyes met his, and you offered a small, apologetic smile. "sorry, theo," you whispered, your voice barely audible. "i zoned out again."
he chuckled, his thumb gently caressing the back of your hand. "it's alright," he reassured you. "i know you can't help it."
you nodded, feeling a wave of gratitude for his understanding. it was something you deeply appreciated about him — his patience and the way he always knew how to bring you back without making you feel bad about it.
and as the two of you continued in your conversation, theo would occasionally pause to check if you were still with him. not out of annoyance, but out of caring. he had become adept at recognizing the signs, the subtle shifts in your expression that signaled you were drifting away. and each time, he would gently call your name, his voice a tether that guided you back to the present. back to him.
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chaethewriter · 2 years
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You're dead to me [4]
dad!Jake Sully x human!daughter!reader
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In which Jake Sully leaves his life on earth to settle down with the Omatikaya people as Toruk Makto. Having a family that consists of four kids with Neytiri, everything seems to work out just fine, but what if the past comes back for him? And his babygirl is right there in front of him?
warning: english isn't my first language, angsty, vulnerable Jake, PTSD, night terrors
Word count: 3k
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Jake Sully felt like gripping his dreadlocks out of his head. He barely showed it when he felt conflicted and unfocused, usually able to hide it well. But right now he couldn't keep the facade up the entire time, acting like everything was fine and it seemed like Neytiri caught on to his behavior as well. He was pacing around the pod as he thought of you, the young warrior that was giving him the silent treatment and he wanted to know why. "Ma Jake," a hand is placed on his shoulder and he stopped his frantic pacing, turning his head to the side to come face to face with his mate, "what is up with you lately? You have been so tense these days." Ever since he met you a few days ago, you didn't leave his mind, wondering what it was with you that made him want to treat you as his own. Was it your name? The fact you were so young? Could it be possible that you really were his daughter? Then why didn't you say anything? Is he officially turning delusional right now? Neytiri wrapped her arm around him as she helped him sit on the woven carpets, her cheek leaning against his shoulder, "talk to me, speak to me." It felt nice to know he could rely on someone, but this wasn't an ordinary problem he could talk about. He never really spoke about his life back on planet earth to anyone, because it was his past life. His present self is on Pandora, so he focused on learning the Omatikaya ways and his focus was on his future. But he always wondered how you were and what you were up to. If you were well and living your life to the fullest. He wished he could have been there to watch you grow up. But now that this warrior was here, he had to know. Was it you? His sweet babygirl? The one who would ask for cuddles everytime you saw him? The one that sat on his lap on his wheelchair as they went outside? His sweet child? Answers is what he needed, but he didn't want to be a bother or seem delusional. What if he made all of this up, because he missed you? "I don't know how to say this, yawne, I'm so conflicted. So guilty." He expected her to reply, but she stayed quiet. She wanted him to explain at his own pace without interfering. His hand dug down to take his hunter's knife in his grip, as he hold it upside down. Neytiri watched his grip on the knife as she squints her eyes. She noticed how something is dangling from the end. She saw it a few times around the pod, knowing it was Jake's. Yet she didn't want to pry him into telling her what it was. He would tell her himself eventually and the time to tell was now. A bond is formed around trust and she trusts him. The locket tiny is in comparison to their size. She watched how he untied the small chain from the thumb hole at the end of the handle. He struggled a bit, because of how tiny the knot was. Pulling at the chain with his fingernails, once he pulled the chain away from the hunter's knife he sheathed the sharp object back to his hip. He pulled Neytiri closer to him as he sucked a ton of air into his lungs, preparing himself for the one big thing he hid from his family this entire time. He had a lot of explaining to do.
Neytiri awaited what he was about to show and tell her. He clicked the photo locket open with his fingernail, revealing a picture of an adorable little girl that are you. Your head was tilted to the side as you flashed a bright cute smile, your chubby cheeks making you ten times more adorable. "This is my daughter, from back on earth." His index finger traced your face as he started feeling even more guilty for never telling his mate. What would she feel at the moment? Betrayal? He watched as Neytiri's expression retorted into an upset one. His hand grabbed a hold of hers, shaking his head as if he could know what she was thinking, "there was no one special back on earth. Only you, ma yawne. I adopted her after her parents passed. I raised her since she was a baby like she was biologically mine." The way Jake spoke about his daughter with pride made a smile creep onto her face, "she's adorable for a human." Jake rolled his eyes in response, of course, she would say something like that. "But why did you stay?" The question came out of nowhere, one he definitely wasn't expecting and one he definitely couldn't answer clearly, "what?" Jake didn't really ask her that question to his mate, he was surprised. "Why did you stay here on Pandora, instead of returning to earth?" The question was overwhelming him, as his lips were pursed and his hand went to his face, burying his nose into his palms. He thought back to his life as a human: he felt miserable, lost, and an alcoholic as he mourned. He was paralyzed, full of PTSD and night terrors as an ex-military. Yet he had one thing that made his life a good one: you.
His head was pounding as his vision was blurred, his ears ringing in pain. When he opened his eyes to look around, all he saw was blood. His dead comrades are covered in blood, bombs, and explosions going off around him. His head feels fuzzy as he turns to his right, coming face to face with your biological father, lying dead on the ground. Even though his eyes were wide open, they were dull and lifeless. Jake lets out a scream, but he couldn't look away. Then your biological dad's body opened his mouth, "you should have jumped in front of the bullet for me. You don't deserve to live, you had nothing. I had everything, a family, a daughter yet to be born. You stole her for me, you don't deserve this life! You don't deserve her!" The words felt like a knife stabbed him in the heart, someone holding onto the handle to twist it around some more to intensify the pain.
Daddy..
The words were faint.
Daddy..!
Who was that?
Why did it feel so familiar?
"Daddy!!" He was shaken to the core as your hands frantically shook his shoulders. He opened his eyes as he was met with your teary eyes. You were seated on his chest in your cute Disney pajamas, the ones he bought you, as you shook his body, "daddy was crying, me woke up and scared." You babbled as you leaned in to wrap your arms around Jake. "Daddy hurt?" Jake immediately wrapped his arms around you as tight as he could, squeezing you in his arms as he shook his head, "I'm not baby," he reassured you, but those words kept ringing in his head. He didn't deserve you.
The next night he drank, drank all he could to distract himself from the pain. He doesn't deserve you. It's his fault. He doesn't deserve to be your dad. He was drunk when he wheeled himself home in his wheelchair, feeling all dizzy as he unlocked the front door. He put you to sleep before he left, so surely you would still be sleeping right? Wrong. When he opened the door, he was met with your teary eyes yet again. He felt a pang in his chest. He kept hurting you, yesterday and now today as well. "Daddy is back? Couldn't sleep without daddy." You babbled as you walked towards him with a plushie in your arms. It was old and about to fall apart. He always told you how you should throw it away since you were gifted a lot of other plushies that you got from people you knew. You always told him no, because it's the plushie you got from him. He drank a lot yes, but seeing you it felt like he already sobered up. He picked you up from under your armpits and put you on his lap, "Yes babygirl I'm back, worry no more." You smiled at him as you pressed your lips against his, "I love you daddy!!" He was scared to say it back, he didn't deserve you to love him. Instead he just held you close, one arm on your head as the other was wrapped around your back.
I love you too my baby, I really do. I'm sorry I can't do better.
Jake finally opened up to Neytiri. About his night terrors, the guilt that ate him up from the inside how he watched you grew up and not your biological parents. How your biological dad, his comrade, died during the war they fought in. How he should have taken the bullet and died to give you your real dad. How your mom died during your birth and that's how you got into his arms. Then he talked about you. That he fell in love with you the moment you were in his arms. He told her what you were like and how you were the light of his life during his dark human times. How you always wanted to bake with him, but it ended up in a flour fight because none of you could cook. So in the end he would order pizza and sit on the couch with you on his lap, eating as you watched a Disney movie with him. She didn't know what flour was, or pizza and Disney, but eagerly listened to his words with a smile. Her mate was smiling as he was talking about you and it made her love you. "And she never wanted me to go shopping without her, to protect me from bad people. She would climb to stand on my lap to get something from the top shelf as I held her short legs." You truly were his angel and Neytiri could see how much you meant to him, but one thing was bugging her.
"But why is your sky daughter distracting you now out of all days, after so long of not seeing her? what is the entire story, ma Jake?" Neytiri really did know him the best, better than he knew himself. He couldn't lie to her, so he told her the truth, the thoughts that have been eating him alive from the inside. What the Tsahik, her mother, told him. The conflicts he had the day he met you, how you gave him the cold shoulder. The dots connected in his head, this wasn't coincidental, Eywa doesn't do coincidences like these. And Neytiri seemed to agree with the look she gave him, "why don't you talk to that demon child?" She hissed as she spoke, the girl she called cute moments ago not looking so cute anymore once she connected that little face to the young warrior that disrespected her mate. If you really were his daughter, she still wouldn't think twice to teach her a lesson. Are sky people all born with that disrespect, ignorance and selfishness? She remembered when she met Jake, he was ignorant like a baby and making noise for no reason. Jake rubbed his temple, the situation getting even more complicated than he thought it would get. His mate who hates sky people together in a room with the sky girl that could be his daughter. Oh Eywa, how was he supposed to handle this? "Ma yawne please don't call her that. And yes, I tried, many times. But every time I try to look for her, she always manages to just slip past my fingers." A huff left his lips as the entire situation frustrated him to the core. He didn't want to jump to conclusions, or get his hopes up. So he needed to get her to talk. He was deep in thought, but then he got an idea as if a light bulb lit up above his head. "I-I need to go somewhere!" He frantically got up from his sitting position, feeling utterly stupid that he didn't think of this before. Ask Norm. Neytiri shook her head with her lips pursing, a small smile forming, hoping everything will turn out well for him. Because even though she hated sky people, she wanted the best for him.
"You can't run away forever," Norm says as a matter of fact as he watched you sharpening your katana on one of the lab tables with his arms crossed, the map of files under his armpit. A groan leaves your lips as you sent him a frown. Norm only smiles, ", you know you have to face him eventually." He took a seat next to you, and he put the map down on the same table you were working on. Norm read your file the same day you had your checkup, the fighting without a mask. Stupid idea by the way. Being a close friend to Jake Sully, he couldn't help but be curious as he spoke to you about it. That's when you told him the whole story. He felt for you but nagged you to eventually talk to him to make up for all the lost time. And to this day he is still nagging you. You let out a groan as you slammed your forehead against the metal table, "Norm, please! Why is everyone forcing me to talk to him?!" "Because he's your dad?", he says as a matter of fact and you frown at his smug face, "whatever mister know it better, I'm going to get some fruits from the forest." You got up from your seat and sheathed your katana into the safety strap on your hip. You walk towards the door as you took your mask off it, putting it against your face. "Think about it while you're gathering those fruits! Maybe Eywa will knock some sense into you when you walk through mother nature." With an annoyed hiss, you took off.
At the same time, Jake Sully made his way toward the lab. The two of you just missed each other as you went the other way. He slammed the first door open, the door disinfecting him as he took the oxygen mask off the wall. He then opened the second door and immediately took a whizz of the Pandorean air through the mask, attaching it at his hip, "NORM!" His voice boomed through the room, but there was no response in the common area. He stepped further inside the room in an awkward position. He couldn't fit inside the room, so he had to bend his back, yet his head still hit the roof. One of his hands was placed on the roof to keep his balance. "Norm!" He screamed yet again, huffing in annoyance as no one seemed to answer him. No scientist was in sight. Was everyone busy? He decided to walk around the room, well it wasn't really walking in his instance as one step was already almost across the room. His head cocked to the side as his eyes met the map on the table. It was the map from a few days ago, the one Norm gave him and was ripped from his hands by you. He knew he shouldn't do it, but curiosity took over. The same curiosity when he first got into the forests of Pandora. His knees hit the cold floor as he sat down. He took the map in his hands, it being the same size as his palm as he flipped the page with his finger. It was all in Na'vi, as the resistance didn't mind integrating into their culture. The first page was the checkup, with notes all around the text, about Seb, Raja and you. He continued flipping, a page about Seb. He didn't care about him, so he continued flipping and flipping. He grew frustrated as he couldn't find your information. Then he reached one of the last pages.
(Y/N) (L/N) SULLY.
His eyes widened, his heart cracking and beating in his throat all at the same time. Your birth date was the same, your birthplace was the same, and the names of your biological parents. As well as his name right under it. He felt dizzy all of a sudden. His breath hitched in his throat. It really was you. "Norm, I'm back." You walked into the room once you put your mask away, a lot of fruits in your arms that humans could digest. "I was so kind to bring fruits for everyone, you better tha-," when you got into the room, you weren't met with Norm, Max, or any other of the scientists that stayed on Pandora. No, you were met with Jake Sully. Your father. You dropped the fruits you were holding on the floor and at the same time the map fell out of his hands. Jake Sully got up from the floor, proceeding to hit his head against the ceiling at the way he suddenly got up. But he didn't feel the pain, he couldn't feel anything except his heart beating so fast with his eyes focused on his daughter, "my babygirl.." the way he spoke your nickname in his English accent made your heart beat in your throat. He took a step towards you, but you backed away, "don't, don't touch me." Your lips pursed as the tears welled up in your eyes. "My baby-" "I SAID DON'T!!" your scream filled the room, "Don't say anything, Jake Sully." Your voice was harsh as you spoke his name, your expression furious yet so upset.
And he felt his heart break.
A/N: thank you sm for reading. I appreciate the comments you all leave me. Thank you for all the support! I also thought of writing a Neteyam x reader after this, so let me know if you would like to read that. <3
Taglist in the comments cause it doesn't fit here [legit felt like I was tagging like 200 people, so annoying I can only tag 5 per comment]
Y'all have some interesting usernames
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moonkissedvisions · 7 months
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Pick an image: Your beauty + How you can express it˚˖𓍢ִ໋🌷͙֒✧˚.🎀༘⋆
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In this reading, you are going to remember what makes you beautiful! Remember that this is a general reading. Take what resonates and leave the rest.
Now, relax and let your intuition guide you to the right pile for you. ✨
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(images from pinterest)
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💄 Pile one
-your tenderness
-your emotional expression
-your loving presence
-your femininity
-your gentleness
-your soft features
-your calming aura
-your pure heart
-your empathy
-your compassion
-your slow, gentle movements
-your soft voice
-your sensuality
-your clear and beautiful eyes
-your consideration
-your creativity
-your glamour
-your hands and feet
-your art
-your shiny hair
-your sensitivity
-your patience
-your receptiveness
-your curves
-your resilience
-your success
-your thoughtfulness
-your independence
💄how you express it: stay away from toxic environments. go to the beach and connect to the ocean. learn to make decisions. if you have a tough time making decisions out of the fear of hurting others, remember that you are only deciding for yourself and others make their own decisions for themselves. seek masculine energy. dont compromise your own well-being just to help other people. protect your heart. dont be afraid to show your feelings. make loving connections. be around uplifting people. be around energy giving people. channel your creativity. wear lightweight fabric clothes that are soft and comfortable. moonbathe.
💄zodiac signs: libra, taurus, cancer, pisces, scorpio.
💄song: Temptation by Raveena.
"In my dreams I can feel your softness. Get lost in your head of curls. I tell you things I can´t tell my boyfriend"
💄potential style:
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💎Pile 2
-your ethic
-your fair-mindedness
-your awareness
-your integrity
-your smile and laugh
-your detachment
-your darkness
-your symmetrical features
-your deep voice
-your mind
-your fitness
-your melancholic gaze
-your poised aura
-your deep thoughts
-your writing
-your eyebrows
-your persistence
-your charm
-your life experiences and stories
-your face
-your resilience
-your courage
-your ambition
-your strength
-your skin tone
-your fun personality
-your wisdom
-your hips
-your determination to push forward
-your relaxing and comforting aura
-your luck
-your endurance
-your mystery
-your reflectiveness
-your elegant style
-your success
-your carefree personality
💎how you express it: find a community in which you feel like you belong, participate in it. let go of the past. give help to those who need it. celebrate your beauty and your life. focus on gratitude. i got the vibe you are a survivor of something, so embrace your strength and share your story. be present. wear head/hair adornments. wear black and red clothes. journal. practice meditation. sports/exercise. you may be a conventionally attractive person or an underrated beauty. eye makeup. you probably look good in short and dark hair.
💎zodiac signs: aries, libra, sagittarius, scorpio.
💎song: Carmen by Lana del Rey.
"She laughs like God, her mind´s like a diamond".
💎potential style:
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💅🏻 Pile 3
-your calmness
-your dreaminess
-your solitude
-your tranquility
-your simplicity
-your logic
-your responsibility
-your baby face
-your confidence
-your spirituality
-your contemplative gaze
-your reserved and aloof personality
-your knowledge
-your cute facial expressions
-your capacity
-your sleepy/big eyes
-your sense of duty
-your fairy-like beauty
-your powerful words and voice
-your potential
-your fierceness
-your healthy appearance
-your optimism
-your nice clothes
-your luscious hair
-your talents
-your confrontational and challenging nature
-your fearless personality
💅🏻how you express it: boosting your self-esteem. sharing and celebrating your achievements with people. affirmations. let others admire you and give you compliments. either a simple and basic style or a striking one flatters you. good quality clothes. resting and rejuvenating. use your alone time to boost your beauty. ask for help when you need it and stop taking on a lot of pressure. just take the weight off your shoulders. get massages often. improve your posture. learn a new hobby. pray and meditate daily. grow your hair/experiment with different hairstyles. be free of other´s expectations and projections.
💅🏻zodiac signs: leo, libra, sagittarius, aries.
💅🏻song: LEAVE ME ALONE by Kari Faux
"I like the truth and my clarity. I kneel and pray for my enemies. ´Cause hate would take up my energy. And i do not need that, mentally, so".
💅🏻potential style:
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Thank you so much for being here! Hope I see you in another reading :)
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botanicalsword · 6 months
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North Node in Natal Chart ☜ life purpose and area of focus
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Our inner aspirations - Talents ; Potential
The North Node is associated with our sense of fulfillment, representing our deepest desires that inspire our quest for satisfaction.
North Node signifies the potential that an individual can develop. The North Node represents a harmonious relationship between us and the collective soul, thus bringing about breakthroughs in our social sphere.
When the North Node aligns with different houses in our birth chart, offering valuable guidance for our lives. Each house represents a specific area of focus and provides insights on how we can navigate and grow as individuals.
On the other hand, the South Node is connected to our need for security. The South Node represents our habits, responses, situations, and experiences that provide us with a sense of security. The South Node refers to a person's past patterns and tendencies. It represents the disharmonious aspects between us and the collective soul, resulting in obstacles in our social relationships.
➻ • ➻ • ➻ • ➻ • ➻ • ➻ • ➻ • ➻ •
1st House
Look inward, understand their own needs, and independent
good to pursue self-employment
learns how to share with others since they cannot rely on others or intimate relationships
rely on themselves - they have to be independent
they are forced to do things on their own and end up doing better than before because they have the ability
2nd House
Accumulate wealth and enhance self-worth; success will naturally follow
focusing on improving yourselves and your financial situation
can earn wealth through their skills
have a specific expertise
have the ability to excel in their profession
resources are not something they possess and must be shared with others
Cultivate strong motivation to accumulate wealth
3rd House
Transform the abstract into the concrete, simplify complex ideas
master effective communication
learn to communicate with people and become messengers of information, sharing their original ideas with those around them
4th House
a stable and harmonious family life provides a solid foundation for our career pursuits
find a balance between our personal and professional lives
learn to balance their family and career by developing their family life
let go of the strong attachment to power as they were power-holders in past lives
Seize the opportunity to play important roles on the social stage
5th House
Develop your talents and boundless creativity to reap abundant rewards
that will bring immense benefits and fulfillment.
well-suited to leading major projects
they need to be mature and objective
avoid spontaneous and childlike behavior
overlook present joys in pursuit of long-term goals
6th House
Emphasis the importance of choosing the right career path
align your work with your goals
strive for efficiency and effectiveness in your professional endeavors
step out of their imaginary world
engage in tangible service work every day
7th House
highlights the significance of interpersonal relationships and collaboration
let go of self-centeredness, learn to compromise
cultivate positive connections with others
learn to let go of themselves and not focus on how others perceive them
8th House
emphasizes trust and sharing
adopting a selfless mindset
being open to collaboration that can bring you numerous rewards and opportunities
need to undergo the destruction of their ideology in order to transform and liberate their souls
9th House
look beyond worldly distractions
explore profound truths and philosophical ideas
venture into new territories, both physically and intellectually, in our quest for knowledge and enlightenment
learn to find the logical reasoning behind all common knowledge and allow it to form more complex and sophisticated structures
spend more time studying profound knowledge
expose themselves to diverse cultures, as it allows them to make comparisons with their own culture
10th House
prompts us to take on social responsibilities and strive for professional success
embrace independence
make a positive impact in our chosen career path
develop a sense of social responsibility
fulfill some social responsibilities through their work and do meaningful things on the social stage
11th House
Step into the public sphere
pursue career opportunities
gain recognition, respect, and the chance to make a meaningful contribution
learn not to be too selfish and to value the importance of the socials
achieve balance through socialising
12th House
cultivate self-understanding and inner growth
focus on our spiritual development
help others achieve their goals that can find deep fulfillment and purpose in life
avoid busyness and overwhelming attention
engage with activities like meditation retreats that allow them to quiet down
>> Masterlist | explicit contents Exclusive access : Patreon • artist’s updates
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hyukalyptus · 21 days
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the willow tree — prince!yeonjun x servant!oc (mira)
cw. brief mention of the death of a grandparent, chubby!reader (rarely self conscious), exes to ???, unsupportive parents, dual POV, classism, mira is described as chubby and has long wavy hair, mira often wears dresses/thongs/etc, smut, sir kink, sneakin around, pet names (darling, babe, baby, love, my girl), lots of cunnilingus/bjs/handjobs, more specific content warnings before each chapter, NSFW/MDNI!!! notes. this has taken me forever!! i know i've been talking about this for so long and i really hope you love it. the poll said to post everything at once, but i put chapter headers so you wouldn't lose your place since its so goddamn long. anyway, enjoy!! wc. 26K im so sry
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cw. yeonjun is a bit of a jerk in a flashback, classism, yj is an environmental activist and if u are a climate change denier, feel free to block <3, mira (oc) is described as chubby, yeonjun sneaks into mira's room (but not in a pervy way).
YEONJUN'S POV
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Open your heart to the adventure ahead. I glare back at the cheesy quote slapped across the page-a-day calendar resting on my desk Mother gifted me last Christmas. The phrases usually amount to nothing more than fortune cookie wisdom or elementary classroom poster encouragements, and today's offering is no exception.
It’s plastered in meetings and to-dos I have today. One meeting is with a new landscape architect for the garden, another with Gemma about the upcoming quarterly dinner, and another with our ambassador about an upcoming international environmental meeting I’m attending later this year. 
Philanthropy has always been a forte of mine. No matter the cause, I can persuade the richest of the rich to contribute to the cause, I host grand fundraising events, and love speaking for what I care about. My pursuits have evolved over time, ranging from childhood health to advocating for mental wellness and combating food scarcity. 
It’s been difficult to choose what I cared about most, but I simply can’t commit all of my focus to every cause, no matter how hard I try. Within the last few years, my focus has been the environment—an urgent matter demanding action, even if I’m not a major contributor to the problem. Nonetheless, I certainly have influence over large corporations that do, not to mention my political influence. I've also cultivated a deep appreciation for the arts, advocating for universal access. Last year, I facilitated the donation of $125,000 worth of instruments to local public schools.
Outside of work, I like learning new instruments and artforms—right now, pottery and piano—and reading. And I love to travel. I always fly commercial—never private. 
“Honey, be in the common room in fifteen minutes,” Mother—the Queen—says at my door. She glows as her deep ruby chiffon dress flows with her movements, exuding royal, elegance, and authority. She finishes putting in her gold earring before adding, “We have a new hire.” 
Ah, the customary introduction of new staff. I finish watering the peace lily on my window bench before heading down the hallway.
Our castle is opulent yet sophisticated and contemporary. I genuinely love the peacock-green walls, the gold trim, the myriad of photos on the walls—memories of the Queen presenting awards, snapshots from my trips, simple portraits. Despite the grandeur of it all, it’s home.
The common room is large and well-lit thanks to the floor to ceiling windows. Lots of comfortable seating scatters the floor for when guests are over. A large Morisot painting hangs on the wall opposite the windows—brushstrokes full of energy and splashes of rich greens and blues. But it’s the simplicity I love about it. It’s why I bought it. 
“Good morning, Your Majesties,” Gemma states as she enters the room, fifteen staff people following behind her. Everyone does their obligatory bows and curtsies, something I never particularly liked. But I understand the purpose behind it. 
The staff stand in a straight line facing us, Gemma being the stiffest of all—she commands the room, adores perfection, and keeps everything in order. She isn’t my personal favorite staff person, but I don’t know what we’d do without her. 
They’re all wearing their boring uniforms—half are in drab grey frocks with white aprons and the other half are in drab grey suits. I’d rather they wear whatever they want.
Formal introductions like these aren’t to my taste. I like getting to know the staff on our own terms. Organically. But this is important to Gemma. It’s a sort of initiation, a welcome into the family. So I let her do what she needs to do, but I’m busy reminding myself of my to-do list.
Email Princess Everly about the upcoming benefitReschedule interview with Philanthropy DailyOutline Climate Week keynote speech
“As you know,” Gemma startles me out of my thoughts. “We’ve welcomed a new person to our team. I want everyone to give her a warm welcome.” Walking to the end of the line, she introduces her, “This is Mira.” 
Mira smiles softly with a curtsy that I’m assuming she learned to do in the kitchen moments earlier. 
“It’s nice to meet you, Ma’am,” she says, tilting her head toward Mother. “And you too, Sir.”
“Nice to—oh.” My mouth hangs open. What am I supposed to say again? Oh right, “Um…it’s nice to meet you too,” I finally murmur. That was embarrassing. 
Everything flashes across the movie screen in my mind—memories with her. The girl I fell in love with when I was a stupid teenager. The girl who stole my first kiss. The girl that was so sweet to me and treated me like any other kid because that’s all I was—a kid.
But she wasn’t just a girl to me. She was the first—only—person I was in love with. The girl I snuck out of the castle at night to go stargazing with. The girl I told all my secrets to. The girl I never thought I’d see again. How could I have forgotten her? 
Do you remember me?
Perhaps that’s all I was to her, though—a boy. Another insignificant teenage romance. Then again…how could she forget? We’d talk for hours about spending our lives together. She’d even picked out her favorite room in the castle that we’d move into together when the time came. It’s now the music room, complete with a piano among other instruments. 
We’d sit under her favorite willow tree in the garden eating red bean buns she’d brought back from the next town over when she’d visit her cousins. 
Have you forgotten? To be fair, It has been six…seven years. Wow. 
The room soon clears, except for Mira and myself. She paces around and smooths her skirt.
“Oh!” Mira gasps. “I’m so sorry. I thought everyone had left,” she says with an awkward curtsy. Simply shaking my head, I stay put. “...Is there anything I can do for you, Sir?”
“Nope…uh, no,” I start, fiddling with the edge of one of the couches before finally speaking up again. “Where are you from?” I’m testing the waters. Trying to see if she remembers me without coming straight out and asking. Honestly, I do this with all our staff: ask where they’re from, get to know them a bit. I don’t like having robots I know nothing about doing everything for me. 
“I’m originally from the next town over.”
Hm. Am I wrong? Maybe she simply looks a lot like my Mira. And has the same name. And the same gorgeous brown eyes. Perhaps I shouldn’t refer to her as my Mira anymore. 
“I’ve lived here since I was a kid though,” she adds. Ah, okay. That seems like something I should’ve known. Nodding, I open my mouth to say something else, but Mother calls me from a distance.
“Yep.” I stand up straight as a pin, turning to exit the room. “Be right there.” 
-
Rummaging through my drawers, I finally find it. The necklace I’d bought Mira all those years ago—a delicate circle pendant with an “M” stamped in the middle hanging from a delicate gold chain. She wore it everyday for six months. I can’t remember how I ended up with it, though. 
So, she’s real. At least that’s true. What should I do with it? I pace up and down the hallways clutching it, brainstorming about what to do with it. Perhaps I should simply walk up to her and ask her about it. Should I wrap it for her and give it to her as a present? Should I give it to Gemma to return to her?
“Oh, Gemma, I’m sorry,” I say, apologizing for almost bumping into her. 
“Not a problem, sir.” She curtsies and begins to walk away, but—
“Gemma?” She turns, holding her hands behind her back, awaiting my instruction. “Can you tell me where the new hire stays? I want to make sure I’ve got everyone’s rooms in order in my head.”
“Mira?” I nod. “She lives in room number six, sir.”
“Thank you.” I smile, but she simply waits. Ah— “Dismissed.” 
As I nonchalantly make my way to the staff wing, I keep an eye out for anyone who might be watching. Not that anyone would question me, but I don’t like people in my business. I eventually find her room in the same hallway as everyone else’s—a basic wooden door painted white with a brass “6” nailed to it—I hesitate before knocking softly. No response. I try again, slightly louder. Still nothing. On the third attempt, I test the door handle and find it unlocked. I shouldn’t be doing this. I’m just gonna get in, put the necklace somewhere, then get out. I won’t bother any of her stuff. 
But her room is so sweet. Plain and organized since she just moved in. A single photograph of her and her parents with who I’m assuming is her grandmother rests on the dresser. The bed’s made neatly. There’s a glass of water sitting on the bedside table. 
Ah, the bedside table drawer. That should be a good spot, but I find things that are way too personal in there and decide against it, respecting her privacy despite the fact that I’m breaking and entering. 
Hm…where to put it? Sock drawer? The windowsill catches my eye—a perfect blend of visibility and subtlety. I approach it, careful not to disturb anything, and hang the necklace on the window latch. It’s hiding in plain sight but still easy to find and doesn’t show that I rummaged through her drawers, which is a plus.
Now, we wait. 
-
A week passes. Radio silence. I haven’t gone back to her room to see if it's still hanging on her window, but I haven’t seen it around her neck either. Perhaps she threw it away and I should give up. 
Trudging through my bedroom door, I loosen my tie and toss my phone and wallet onto my bed. I attempt to rub the tiredness out of my eyes, but I’m exhausted. Thankfully, my dinner is already waiting for me on my dresser under a cloche. 
Next to my plate is a glass of ice water dripping in condensation along with a napkin and a set of cutlery. And resting right next to my fork is Mira’s necklace. The sight of it sends a jolt through my system. I knew she came into my room somewhat regularly—all the staff do—but thinking about her in my room makes me tingle. 
I sink onto the edge of my bed with a sigh as the chain slips through my fingers. When I first gave it to her seven years ago, her eyes lit up and her smile made everything feel right. I knew we were supposed to be together. That all seems so distant now.
Why didn’t she simply get rid of it? 
Maybe she hasn’t given up entirely and neither should I. 
It goes back and forth between us for a few weeks. After I found it on my dresser, I slipped it into her apron pocket. Then I found it between the pages of my notebook. The day after I wrapped it around the sugar bowl’s lid handle, it appeared wrapped around the handlebar of my bike. 
We never spoke a word of it. 
Every time I found it, it made me smile, but I knew this couldn't continue forever. I need to see her, to talk to her, to find out what was really going on. Does she want to talk to me? Does she hate me? Does she even remember me?
The next morning, I slip a note under her door. 
Meet me under the willow tree at 8. - Y
Every minute of the day feels like an eternity as I wait for evening to arrive. Doubt gnaws at me, but the thought of seeing and speaking to Mira keeps me sane. 
The evening air is cool and crisp. The sun has dipped below the horizon, painting the sky in hues of deep blue. Waiting under the willow tree, I think about the many times Mira and I have sat under here and talked for hours, watching the stars as the branches swayed in the wind. We’d talk about our days, places we wanted to visit together, how I wanted to tell everyone about us but she was too hesitant. 
Minutes start to feel like hours as I wait, the silence around me amplifying my racing thoughts. What if she never comes? What if she didn’t get the note? What if she’s avoiding me? Does she hate me?
Finally, soft footsteps approach and I turn to see Mira, her silhouette framed by the dim garden lights. She walks slowly, like she’s dragging it out as long as possible. As she comes up to me, her eyes search mine. My heart races, there’s a lump in my throat. 
"Mira," I start, my voice barely above a whisper. She curtsies. “You don’t need to do that.”
“It’s my job, Sir,” she says flatly. Rocking back on my heels, I press my lips together. 
"I thought I’d return this straight to you,” I say, holding up the necklace. “It seems like it keeps getting lost.” I chuckle nervously, trying to break the tension.
“Thanks,” she replies flatly as she accepts the necklace. Oh my god, she’s gorgeous. I thought I’d memorized every detail about her, but seeing her now under the lamppost, it’s like I’m rediscovering her all over again. She’s beautifully chubby and always has been. Her long, dark brunette hair has a tint of red that makes it look like cinnamon. The wrinkled t-shirt and sweatpants paired with an old pair of flip flops tells me she either forgot about our meeting and got dressed in a hurry or wants to get this over with. Or perhaps both. 
“What can I help you with, Sir?” Awkward silence. 
“Mira,” I whisper, her name a fragile plea on my lips. She stares at the ground, avoiding my eyes. What was she expecting? For me to never bring us up? Of course I’d talk to her about it. “Mira Ashenrose, right?” She hums quietly. “I realized I never asked your last name since you started working here.” 
The silence between us is thick with tension. Memories flood my mind and I hope the same is happening to her. The last time we were here, we laid with each other for hours, so long that the sun started rising. She fit so perfectly in my arms. 
“I can’t forget you, Mira,” I say, stepping closer. “Why are you avoiding…us?” The space between us is charged as electricity swirls around us. “Remember us? All those nights we went stargazing? Our picnics? Those daisy chains you made me? You can’t tell me you don’t—”
“Of course I remember,” she interrupts, tears glistening in her eyes. My heart aches at the sight. “I remember everything, Yeonjun.” She wipes a tear from her cheek. “I remember falling asleep under this willow tree with you. I remember dancing with you. I remember kissing you before sneaking back into my house. I remember everything, okay?” Her voice trembles. “But that doesn’t mean I want to.” 
“What? Why wouldn’t you?”
She looks utterly heartbroken. “Don’t do this to me, Yeonjun. Stop being cruel.”
Her words punch me in the gut and everything comes rushing back. The reason we ended. I’d asked her to our annual ball—our first public appearance together. The Queen would find out. My royal friends would find out. The whole country would find out. She was a wreck for weeks leading up to it, but I reassured her every chance I got that it would be okay. 
She was—and still is—smart, incredibly beautiful, but most of all, I loved her. Why should anyone care if she wasn’t a royal as long as I was in love with her? That should’ve been enough. 
"Yeonjun, darling," my mother's voice sliced through the delicate hum of the ballroom. "I'd like you to meet Princess Penelope. She's your esteemed companion for the evening." Always so professional. 
“Nice to meet you,” I said, offering a strained greeting to Penelope before turning to face my mother.  "May I have a word with you in private?"
Graciously excusing herself, she left me to confront my mother amidst the grandeur of the ballroom. "Why would you do this? I told you I didn’t want to be set up.”
"I understand, Yeonjun," my mother replied with a tight-lipped smile. "But it's time you started considering your future—"
"My future?" I scoffed. "I'm eighteen."
"Exactly," she countered, her tone firm. "You need to think about a suitable partner. Someone who embodies the qualities of a Queen—dignity, wisdom, influence. And most importantly: royal,” she pointed a finger at me. “I won’t be around forever, darling.”
“Do they really need to be royal?”
My mother's smile widened, a hint of mischief glinting in her eyes. "Of course. Why do you ask?"
I swallowed what I really needed to say. There’s no way I’d win an argument anyway. With a resigned nod, I returned to Princess Penelope, the weight of my mother's expectations—and I suppose my entire country’s—heavy on my shoulders. So heavy I’d forgotten—
“Mira,” I said under my breath. There she was, staring at me in disbelief as I danced with Princess Penelope. Ignoring the questioning from Penelope, I abandoned her mid-step and made a beeline for Mira, my heart pounding with a mixture of dread and urgency. "Mira, wait!" I called out, desperation lacing my voice as I chased after her out of the ballroom and into the moonlit courtyard.
"Why, Yeonjun?" Mira's voice cracked as she finally turned to face me, tears staining her cheeks. "Why would you do this?"
"I had no choice," I confessed, my mother’s expectations running circles in my mind. “My mother made me.” 
"You could've told me," Mira interjected, her voice trembling.
"When?" I demanded, frustration bubbling to the surface. "I only found out thirty minutes ago—"
"You could've texted me.”
"I can't risk—"
"What, people finding out about us?" Mira's voice rose with each word, her anguish palpable in the cool night air. “Are you ever going to tell The Queen about us?” Squeezing the bridge of my nose, my eyes twist shut. “Well?” 
Looking at her—possibly for the last time—she looked absolutely beautiful. Her gown was perfect. Soft lavender satin that caught the light as it cascaded down the skirt, a glimmer of fuschia reflecting in the light. I wanted nothing but to hug her, to feel the satin on my fingertips. The sweetheart neckline was gorgeous on her, accentuating her frame perfectly. The M necklace rested around her neck. Her hair was absolutely perfect—she’d been trying out styles for weeks and the final choice was supposed to be a surprise.
“Answer me, Yeonjun.”
I couldn’t do that anymore. Mother meant what she said to me earlier that night: they must be royal. “Just go home,” I said, turning to leave her there alone. Breaking her heart was the best thing to do in the moment. If I could never truly be with her, breaking it off right then and there was the easiest thing for both of us. 
“What? Why—”
“What do you expect, Mira? You’re not royalty. You’re nothing,” I said. “Now go home.”
Too stunned to speak, I stare at her in disbelief. How could I have been so evil to her? What was I thinking? Why did I forget that? Must’ve blocked it from my memory. And now that I’m older, I’d never let some stupid outdated rule like that stand in our way. 
“I’m so—”
“Save it,” she says flatly. “I should’ve thrown away the necklace the first time I found it.” Straightening her posture, she wipes the final tear rolling down her cheek, shaking her head to rid of the emotions. “Let’s pretend this whole thing never happened, yeah?” 
Fine. If someone did that to me, if someone told me I was nothing after telling them they were in love with me for six months, I’d probably feel the same way, if I’m honest. 
As I accept my fate, I turn to walk away, but halt in my footsteps. “No,” I start. “I don’t want to forget this—that we ever happened.” She stays standing there, arms crossed, trying to control her breathing. But I hover over her, waiting for a response. “Please. I miss—”
“Don’t.” She snaps, shaking her head. “Don’t even think about starting that bullshit with me…Sir.”
“I told you, Mother set me up with her.”
“I don’t care about that. You told me I was nothing.” Speechless again, I can’t move. “You never even tried to contact me again and you expect me to give you a second chance?”
“That was seven years ago.”
“So?”
“I’m…we’re both so different. I used to be a stupid teenager. I would never— Please—”
“Please, what? What do you want from me?”
“I don’t—” Honestly, I thought maybe we could pick up where we left off, but I don’t know if that’s possible at this point. I hadn’t felt lonely until she showed up, drowning in my endless to do lists, barely ever hanging out with anyone that wasn’t on my staff or another royal. “I don’t know.”
“Maybe think about that first.”
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cw. eating food. 
MIRA'S POV
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On my days off, I hide away in a gazebo in a quiet part of the garden and sketch. It’s a nice place to escape to, away from everyone while staying close to home. Home. It’s still hard to believe this castle is my home, even if I am just a servant. 
The gazebo sits against a stone wall on one side—one of those that looks so old you wonder how it's still standing, withered with moss growing between the stones, vines going up and around it. The bench theoretically offers lots of seating, but most of it is covered in pots, plants, and gardening supplies. It’s more storage than an intended place to rest. 
My spot was bare when I found it and it gives me a full view of the grounds. To the right, our village is on full display—colorful, quaint, and inviting. To the left, a thick forest stands tall, leaves rustling with the wind.
Someone’s foot crunches the gravel as they walk toward me and my little corner, but I don’t react. As long as I stay relatively still and quiet, no one bothers me. I continue my sketch of those cute squirrels running around together under the willow tree I’ve always loved. Although it’s left a bit of a sour taste in my mouth recently. 
But the presence of a person looms behind me. Can’t I have one quiet day to myself? Don’t turn around. Don’t turn around. Don’t turn around. They’ll leave eventually. Maybe. Hopefully. 
“...Mira?” A familiar voice says, slow and undeniably warm. 
“Oh.” I stand up straight, giving my obligatory curtsy Gemma has ingrained in me since day one. 
“I told you not to do that,” Yeonjun—Prince Yeonjun—says. He’s dressed casually today, cute even. But don’t you dare tell anyone I said that. A simple maroon cashmere sweater that fits perfectly with his dark wash jeans that barely gather at his ankles, exposing his black vans. A short necklace of black beads sits around his neck. One of those outfits you’d see him wearing in a magazine with a caption like, ‘Royals – they’re just like us!’ 
“And I told you, it’s my job,” I say, returning to my seat, continuing my drawing. 
“Not right now though,” he says, clasping his hands behind his back. “It’s your day off, right?”
“You have my schedule memorized?” 
“No,” he chuckles, running his fingers through his shiny, black hair that I can practically feel on my fingertips. “Why else would you be hiding in my corner?”
“I figured you followed me—your corner?” 
“I wasn’t following you,” he says, walking closer before rocking back on his heels as he stops. “I read here sometimes.” He holds up a book. “You thought this spot just happened to be clear on its own?” I hum, scooting over and patting the bench next me. “You’re really okay with me here? I don’t want to bother you,” he says, as genuine as one can sound. But I’m still surprised. Sure, he’s not the demanding type, but I don’t know if I’d act the same if I were royalty. 
“To be fair, I was here first,” I say smugly. Although, he is still my boss. It doesn’t matter that we know each other from that past. I add a quick, “...Sir.” for good measure. “Go ahead and sit.”
“Don’t you hate me?” He asks and I chuckle, but when I look up, I see he’s serious. 
“No, I don’t hate you,” I say. “I’ve moved on, Yeonjun.”
Shrugging, he sits near me, opening his book. I tried to get a peek at the title, but I never got the chance without being too obvious. As he sits next to me, I must admit his presence adds a peaceful comfort to what would typically be a relatively silent, if not boring, morning. There’s even a sort of completeness. Birds seem to be chirping more harmoniously. The clouds have disappeared. Oh, what am I saying? That’s ridiculous. That’s a coincidence, Mira. 
“You still draw?” He perks up, pulling me from my thoughts. 
“Of course,” I answer immediately. 
“What are you working on?” Straightening on the bench, I riffle through some papers quickly, trying to hide any potentially embarrassing sketches I don’t want him to see. 
“Just sketches.”
He nods, curiosity etched on his face. “Can I see?” 
“Uh,” I clear my throat. “Sure,” I say, sitting one of my feet on the ground, turning toward him. Our knees brush each other for a moment, but I quickly move it out of his way. Smiling, he examines my drawing of my favorite willow tree I finished yesterday before bed. My cheeks flush as I remember why it was on my mind while drawing, but I hope he doesn’t draw that conclusion. 
“Ah, you’ve gotten so much better.” 
“What’s that supposed to mean?” I chuckle. 
“I just mean,” he looks at me, eyebrows raised in defense. “I can tell you’ve been working on it, I dunno. How else would I say that?”
“That’s fine,” I say. Awkwardness fills the air as I shift my weight around. 
“I’ve been doing pottery, you know.”
I do know. But I’m not supposed to be listening in on their conversations at dinner. I can’t help I’m nosy. I simply ask, “Really?” Humming, he pulls out his phone. 
“This one just came out of the kiln.” He hands me his phone—I wonder what world secrets are on Prince Yeonjun’s phone—to show me a beautifully hand thrown vase. The body is smooth and cylindrical with a slightly tapered neck that gracefully flares out at the top. White glaze covers the surface, contrasting with the thick organic strokes of black glaze. Small, oval handles are attached on both sides. “I just learned how to do handles.” 
“Oh my gosh, Yeonjun…” My breath is taken away. I had no idea he was such an incredible artist. It looks like it was plucked straight out of a museum. “It’s gorgeous.” He always was one to do things perfectly—an all-or-nothing kinda guy. 
“Thanks,” he smiles, pressing his lips together. 
“Show off,” I say, lightly nudging his arm with my elbow.  
An hour or so passes and I’ve switched sitting positions several times, eventually landing on a classic leaned-back-against-the-wall position with my feet up on the bench so I can use my knees and thighs as a desk. He’s barely moved an inch though, sitting happily with his back pressed against the wall, one leg crossed over the other, reading. 
I barely notice my toes absent-mindedly tucking themselves under his thigh like I used to do when we were—
“Oh!” A servant that I haven’t learned the name of yet stumbles in on us, carrying a tray full of food. “I’m sorry—”
“No, it’s okay,” Yeonjun says, but I’m doing everything I can to hide my face. This can’t get back to the other servants. They’re all such gossips, which I guiltily love, but that doesn’t mean I want them gossiping about me. “Come on over, Natalie.”
“I swear I didn’t tell her about your spot, Sir,” Natalie says nervously.
“I know you didn’t. It’s okay,” he offers a gentle smile, reaching out for the tray, dismissing her after she curtsies, scurrying off quickly. “Don’t worry,” Yeonjun says to me. “She keeps all my secrets—she’s the only one that knows I come out here. She won’t say anything about,” he trails off, gesturing his hand between us.
“There’s nothing to tell.” 
“Alright,” he sighs. “You hungry?”
“No.” My stomach growls at the worst possible moment. 
“I kinda feel like you are.” I ignore him, focusing on my drawing. “I asked her to bring another meal. You can have it if you want.” 
Peeking over my sketchbook, the tray is fully decked out in sandwiches that look absolutely delicious; sides of mac and cheese and fruits, complete with two glasses of water and a little flower.
“I suppose I’m pretty hungry.” My stomach growls again at the sight of it. “Oh, ignore that; she’s been fussy all day.” I scooch closer to him hesitantly accepting the offer. 
“Mira,” Yeonjun starts. I hum, reaching for a pineapple slice. “Why are all the staff afraid of me?”
“Huh?” I look up at him.
“You saw how nervous Natalie was just thinking I might be mad at her.”
“I think you forget you’re a literal prince,” I say matter-of-factly.
“Are you scared of me?”
Hm. That’s an interesting question. No, of course I’m not scared of you. Why would I be? But perhaps the real answer is Yes, but in the way that everyone makes fun of when people say it out loud. Honestly, I am afraid. Afraid of falling for him again. Getting my heart broken again. We’ve barely talked since I started working here, but I know how convincing he can be. If I’m not careful, he’ll have me wrapped around his finger by next week. 
And let’s not forget he told me I was nothing. That kind of thing doesn’t simply go away. 
I wonder if he’s ever said something like that to one of the servants. Does he think all non-royalty are nothing? No, he wouldn’t be like that anymore. But how would I really know?
Shrugging, I finally say, “No.”
“That’s not very convincing.”
I roll my eyes, “I don’t know, Jjun—” I catch myself as that dumb nickname comes out of my stupid fucking mouth. What’s wrong with me? He looks at me with wide eyes. “Uh, Yeonjun…Sir.” Let’s just pretend like nothing happened. “You said some hurtful stuff to me. Have you said anything like that to one of them?”
“I don’t think so.”
“You could ask a servant if they’re scared of you.”
“I just did,” he points out. Right. I’m…a servant. I keep forgetting that bit when we’re alone. When we’re alone, it's like we’re friends. It’s casual and comfortable. See? What did I tell you? A few hours of silence followed by a few minutes of talking and I’m right back to where I was seven years ago. Stop being so pathetic. 
“Ah.”
“I didn’t mean—”
“No, I know,” I chuckle. “You’re right. But maybe ask a servant that seems like they’re scared of you. They’re probably scared of Gemma more than anything.”
As we wrap up our lunch, his phone buzzes—a calendar reminder probably. 
"I have to get going," he announces, moving efficiently to gather the remnants of our meal onto the tray. But as he stands to leave, an inexplicable urge pulls at me, begging him to stay. Please don’t do this, Mira. Don’t be stupid. 
With a gentle smile, he suggests, "I'll talk to you later?" It's then that I realize I’ve been staring at him in silence for the past who knows how long. "Oh, you have a leaf in your hair." I attempt to remove it myself, but without a mirror, it’s proving to be difficult. "Here," he offers, leaning down. My mind screams at me to resist, but his closeness sends a rush of warmth through my body. With gentle precision, he plucks the leaf away, discarding it casually.
Yet, instead of stepping away, he stays close. I pretend not to notice the magnetic pull between us. Stop it. Admit it. You want him to stay. Straightening my posture, we’re almost leaning into each other, like we’re about to—no. Our gazes dart between each other's lips, ghosts of his touch haunting my senses. Does he still taste the same?
The cool breeze snaps me back to reality. What were you thinking? "Thanks," I mumble, retreating to reestablish a distinct boundary.
"No worries," he replies. The fading sound of his footsteps on gravel leaves me facepalming.
How can I be this close to him without seeing him? Without falling for him again? There’s only one thing to do. 
Avoid him at all costs.
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cw. sexual tension, suggestive.  
MIRA'S POV
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“Didn’t you finish Mother’s painting in two weeks?” Prince Yeonjun asks, leaning against the doorframe to the sunroom. It’s become my makeshift painting studio. Once the Queen found out I sometimes do art, she thought it’d be a good idea to commission me for new portraits to replace the old ones in the Great Hall. I like painting and I need the money so I of course said yes. 
“Mm-hmm,” I nod, finishing up the final touches on the pattern of his royal cloak. “I’ve been busier recently,” I lie. In the painting, he sits with an arm resting atop a piano against a backdrop of rich velvet curtains like the ones in the living room. The intricate details of his uniform are perfect if I do say so myself. His face, though, is a grey blob with a basic sketch. I work off photographs for the most part, but for faces, I like them sitting right in front of me to get every detail.
But him sitting a foot away from me while I carefully analyze every detail of his face for hours does not sound like a good idea right now. Even if it does sound appealing. 
“You almost ready for me?” 
I should get it over with, but my hands are tired and I have a lot of tasks for my actual job to do before the end of the day.
“Tomorrow,” I say, walking my paintbrushes to the sink. “Does that work for you?” He’s quiet, so I look over my shoulder to make sure he heard me. Pushing himself off the doorframe, he shoves his hands in his pockets. 
“Y-yeah,” he says. “That should work.”
“Okay.” I wipe my paintbrushes with a towel. “Meet here after lunch?” Smiling gently, he nods. “Well, I’ve gotta get back to my real job. See you tomorrow,” I say with a curtsy. 
Tomorrow comes way too fast. I brush my teeth, floss, use mouthwash, and chew some gum to get rid of any trace of my lunch. Dragging my feet down the hallway, I can’t get there slow enough. 
“Ah, Mira,” he says with a smile that warms me from the inside out. I respond with a simple hello, but I’m already burning up as I gather my brushes and paints while he watches me in silence. I realize I’d forgotten to curtsy, but I decide to omit it this time considering he hates it so much. 
“The Queen sat on this stool when I painted her,” I say, moving the stool into place. “You might need to adjust the height.” While he does that, I mix a base for his skin. Starting by mixing the primary colors to get a deep brown, I add a good amount of white to lighten it up then a good amount of yellow and a touch of red for warmth. “Sit still,” I giggle, holding my palette knife next to his cheek. His shoulders rise and fall with his breathing while I add more brown to darken it a bit. Clasping my hands together, I say, “Alright, I’ll be painting for at least two hours, so do anything else you need to do.” 
“I’m good.” 
Shrugging, I adjust my easel so he’s in my sightline but not too close.
Two minutes into painting, he asks, “So how’s your day been?”
“Good. You?” 
“Good,” he responds. I truly don’t mind silence between us two, but I must admit this silence is deafening. “Do you work in silence or can you talk?”
I giggle and say, “I can talk. Or you can play music if you want.” 
“How about both?” I nod. “Alexa, play classical music to focus,” he pauses, waiting for it to respond and start playing. “Tell me what you’re working on.”
“Well,” I start, swishing my brush into some clean water. “I’d already had a basic sketch of your face, but I made some skin tones first. A base, a highlight, and a shadow,” I say, showing him my palette. “Then I’ll go in and fine tune everything.” 
Time passes by—I’ve honestly always liked simply existing near him. We used to do this all the time back when we were dating. Sit near each other and just be. Quietly. Like the other day in the garden when I was drawing and he was reading. It’s peaceful. I can focus. 
It smells like that day in here—soil and paint. Whoever keeps up with these plants is great at their job. They’re gorgeous even in the winter.
“Now I’m working on your eyes,” I say matter-of-factly. Part of me starts with his eyes to get it over with and avoid them as soon as I can, but the other part counts myself lucky that I have reason to stare at them for the next thirty minutes or so. I mix a deep, cool brown and dip my pinkie into it to hold it up next to his eye. “I’m, um,” I glance down. “I’m gonna touch your face.” My pinkie rests on the apple of his cheek so I can get as close as I can to his eye without touching it. “Open your eyes.” 
Damn. Those eyes are like mirrors reflecting my deepest emotions. The world around us fades. I almost drop my palette. Glimpses of our history, our laughter, tears, and dreams we’ve shared together swirl around in them. They take my breath away. 
Realizing we’re staring at each other, I snap out of it, jerking my hand away from him and dive into painting them instead of gazing into them. 
“First try?” I hum in question. “You got the color of my eyes right on the first try?” My ears warm up.
“Well, you know…” I say, my head hanging low. “They’re the same as the Queen’s.” Lie. The Queen’s are much warmer. Hues of deep mahogany and amber; they’re vibrant with hints of gold and copper that catch the light. They glow in the sun. His, on the other hand, are intensely dark. Deep and rich like shadowy moonlight. You could get lost in them like a maze at night. They’re like reading a book by candlelight. They’re gorgeous. 
“Why do I need to be here again?” He asks and I look jokingly offended. “I mean, you worked off photos up until now.”
“So I can get the details of your face I might otherwise miss,” I say, closely examining his face. “Like this freckle,” I say, poking the freckle on his right cheek with the end of my paintbrush that I would never miss in a million years. It’s one of my favorites. “Or this little birthmark.” He’s got the slightest purple splotch on his cheek that again, I’d never miss. 
“You’re painting those?”
“Of course,” I say. “They’re part of you.” Out of the corner of my eye, I catch him grazing his fingertips over his cheek, smiling to himself. “Move closer.” Examining his features even closer, I’m a few inches from his face. I, again, realize I’m staring at his face and my heartbeat quickens. I snap back and say, “Um…sorry.”
“You’re okay.”
But this keeps happening. I keep getting close to him, our hearts beating together as our breath gets sharp. And fuck, I miss him. I can’t help but think about if I were doing this for fun, not as a staff person. I used to draw him all the time. 
And now, here he is, grown up, mature, tall, and utterly handsome as I’m forced to paint a larger-than-life portrait of the guy I used to love and thought I’d spend the rest of my life with. I was such a stupid eighteen-year-old. 
He doesn’t stop staring at me. Not when I add details to his nose. Not when I clean my brush. Not when I observe my painting from a distance. I catch his glare. 
“Can you stop staring at me like that?” I ask, a smile teasing my lips. 
“Like what?”
“Like…” I cock my head to the side. 
“Like you’re the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen?” Ah, fuck you. The warmth that rushes through my body is overwhelming and I swear my knees are ready to buckle. My hands tremble as I fight the urge to drop everything. “I don’t think I can stop that, Mira,” he adds softly. 
“You can’t say shit like that to me, Yeonjun,” I manage to say, my smile stubbornly betraying my attempt to stay cool. I keep my eyes on the brush, pretending I’m not seconds away from screaming. 
“Why not?” he murmurs, leaning in closer, his breath warm against my ear.
“Because…” I finally look over at him, incredibly close to me, eyes flitting all over my face, indiscreetly hovering on my lips. Admittedly, my eyes do the same: land on his lips and suddenly the only thing I’m thinking about is kissing him. “Because…” I repeat, trying to get me to do literally anything but kiss him in this moment, but we both know that’s the only thing either of us want. Each other. To be together. 
I try to remember what his lips feel like. Strong and passionate. At least they used to be. 
How have they changed now that he’s older and has most likely gone through a few serious partners and several hook-ups? Are they softer and more loving now that he’s not a dumb ego-ridden eighteen-year-old? Are they even stronger now that he’s found himself and has solidified his position as a Prince? I wonder. No. Don’t do this. Oh, but why not? 
In one ear, the wise and cautious version of me begs me to refrain from kissing him. Don’t do this, Mira. Remember how heartbroken you were. Mixing romance with your boss is a terrible idea. 
The more rebellious, lust-ridden version of me counters, Look how much hotter he’s gotten. Just make out with him. The Queen is your boss, not him. You could always make out with him, maybe even fuck him, and pretend like nothing happened. 
Wise Mira gasps, That’s mean! 
Right, Lustful Mira says. But he was mean to her. 
Listen to me, Wise Mira chirps up. Don’t kiss him at all. 
Lustful Mira chimes in again, But Mira…look how absolutely delicious his lips look. You want him. He clearly wants you. Don’t you wanna—
“Because I said so.”
He chuckles, “Fair enough.” 
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cw. brief mentions of alcohol, cunnilingus, fingering, mira briefly feels self conscious about her body and pubic hair, mira lies to a stranger, begging, yj sneaks into a room she's in, sir kink. 
MIRA'S POV
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"What are you wearing friday?" Hyomin casually asks, a knowing smirk on her lips as she effortlessly dusts the coffee table while I clean the windows—the newbie’s job. 
"Aren't we supposed to wear our uniforms?"
"Oh no, darling! The quarterly dinners are the sacred day we break free from the uniform chains—as long as it’s formal." Hyomin is one of few servants I genuinely like. Most of the others are constantly trying to play the game to move up the ladder—none of them really want to be friends. 
The ones that aren’t too busy playing the game are too on edge, following each rule to the letter. 
Yeonjun—Prince Yeonjun, I correct myself for the millionth time—unexpectedly knocks on the door. I, Hyomin, and Natalie perform our obligatory curtsies, even though I know he hates it. If we don’t though, Gemma fusses at us, which he also knows, so he plays along.
"Excuse me," he says, clearing his throat. "Could I trouble someone for a refill on my coffee?"
Natalie, always willing to volunteer, seizes the opportunity and responds quickly. "Certainly, Sir." She breezes by the coffee table to scoop up the metal coffee pot resting on it, returning to the Prince to pour him a fresh mug. 
Our eyes catch each other, a small yet obnoxiously noticeable smile appears on both our faces. Hyomin nudges my arm and mumbles, "And you've gotta wear something extra special for him, right?" What? My eyes widen, shock and annoyance evident in my expression. Shooting a piercing glare at her, I’m rendered momentarily speechless. Hyomin persists, her voice low, "Oh, don't act all innocent. I've seen how you two look at each other.”
I scoff and roll my eyes. "I don't know what you're talking about."
A mischievous smile plays on her lips, "It's adorable, really. The blushing, the hair-tucking when he says hello, the clumsy encounters,” she says, tilting her head toward him. “Look how red his ears are.” I must admit, they are pretty pink. “We all talk about it, you know.”
“Did Natalie say something?”
“No,” she says confused, but her look soon turns suspicious. “Why would she?” Damn it. Why didn’t I keep my mouth shut? I avoid eye contact, hoping she’ll give up, but I doubt she ever will. “Mira, why would Natalie say something?”
“No idea.” 
She hums knowingly. "Yeah, right. You two are so obviously dating, it’s ridiculous,” she says, folding the decorative blanket that hangs on the back of the couch while he leaves the room. “We're all waiting for the announcement."
“We are not dating.”
Persistent as ever, Hyomin challenges again, "Look me in the eye right now and swear you haven’t at least kissed him."
I stand tall, smoothing the skirt of my uniform, then take a deep breath and lock eyes with her. “I swear I haven’t kissed him.”
Hyomin narrows her gaze, searching for any crack in my expression. My stomach churns, and before I can stop it, the words spill out in an unfiltered confession.
“…in seven years.”
Damn it. How did she get that out of me?
“What?”
“Shh—!”
“But wh-what do you mean?” She giggles, eager to hear what I’m assuming is the best gossip in years. Although, with royals, there has to have been something juicier than a teenage romance, right?
Motioning for secrecy, I say, “Promise you won’t say anything to the other servants. Please.” Hyomin nods, an expression that practically screams, Spill it. “We knew each other when we were teenagers. We dated then, okay? We broke up seven years ago. I’ve barely spoken to him since.” 
“Oh. My. God. Oh my god, ohmygod, ohmygod, ohmygod!”
“Calm down.” I hold my hands up. “It’s no big deal.”
“No big deal? It’s a huge deal,” she exclaims. “Y’all are totally still into each other.” 
“I mean, he’s cute,” I say. “But that ship has sailed.”
“Oh really?”
“Really.” I nod. “We’re just too different.”
“I dunno, I think—”
“Nope.”
“I just mean—”
“Drop it, Hyomin. It will never happen.” My words carry a finality to the discussion.
“Fine,” she concedes, folding her dust rag to place on the table. “The question still stands—what are you wearing Friday?”
Shrugging, I shake my head, “I don’t have anything formal.”
“A perfect excuse for a shopping trip—let’s go into town tomorrow,” she suggests. “I’ll get someone to cover for us for the lunch service.” 
-
“Ah, look at you!” Hyomin cheers. “You’re absolutely stunning.”
“I can’t remember the last time I got this dressed up.” Actually, I do. That night. The night he broke my heart. But I’m not thinking about that right now. In fact, I won’t be thinking about Yeonjun at all tonight. 
Walking down the stairs into the royal hall, the silk of my dress rustles gently as it shimmers in the light. It’s a gorgeous deep viridian that cascades to the floor, creating an ethereal effect with every move I make. The bodice is fitted perfectly, with boning that snatches my waist and makes my tits look amazing. The off-the-shoulder straps elegantly drape across my arms. To complete the look, I’m wearing gold dangle earrings and my hair is styled in loose waves that cascade down one of my shoulders. Around my neck is a delicate circle pendant with a moon stamped into it. 
It’s simply beautiful in here. I’d helped set it up this morning, but seeing the guests dressed up, hearing the musicians playing, the grandeur of it all—it takes my breath away. The air is filled with the soft murmur of conversation with an occasional loud laugh. 
One couple glides along the dancefloor in each other’s arms, both of their dresses flowing gracefully across the dancefloor. A group of young people wearing crowns and tiaras clink their glasses near the champagne tower. Someone else checks their jacket at the front door. 
Deep emerald velvet curtains drape along the walls, adding even more drama. Every detail of the Hall has been meticulously curated to evoke a sense of luxury. 
“Excuse me,” someone says as they brush my shoulder. “Oh.” It’s Yeon—Prince Yeonjun. “Hello.” I nod to him before my obligatory curtsy. Not even trying to hide the fact that he looks me up and down, he makes my cheeks burn. “You look…” He clears his throat. “Um, really pretty.” Well, there goes me not thinking about him at all tonight. How could I put him out of my mind when he looks like this? Positively sexy as hell in his prince uniform. So regal, rich, and powerful. 
“Thank you, Sir,” I say. I catch Hyomin out of the corner of my eye looking stiff as a board with her mouth hanging open. 
Extending his arm out, he asks me, “Care to dance?”
God, I’d fucking love to. How did he do this to me so quickly? We have one nice conversation, maybe a few glances in the hallway and suddenly he’s making my heart race like he did when we were dating. “I don’t think it would look very good for either of us if you were dancing with one of your servants.” Is that even true? I don’t know. 
He nods, pressing his lips together. “I’ll see you later then?”
“When?” I ask as he raises an eyebrow. I hope I didn’t sound too desperate. “I just mean, I don’t know why we would see each other.”
“Right,” he says. “Well, have a good evening.” He nods gently at me and then to Hyomin before walking away. 
Turning to Hyomin, she looks at me with a wide smile and knowing glare. She’s such a smug bitch. “Oh my god,” she gasps under her breath, drawing the edge of her wine glass to her lips. “Look at Prince Sipho over there.” Tilting her head to the side, she adds, “He may be even dreamier than Yeonjun.”
I scoff in my head, but I’d never tell anyone that. Instead, I murmur, “Where?”
“Right over there,” she smirks, tipping her head toward a literal tall, dark, and handsome man. Commanding the room with his height, he undeniably catches my gaze—not an eye contact that stops time in its tracks, but one where we can’t take our eyes off each other. 
Prince Sipho pushes his way through the crowd toward me, but I can’t help but wonder where Yeonjun is. Actually, why do I care at all? Shaking the thought out of my mind, I welcome this new prince’s hand reaching for my own as he delicately touches my knuckles with the poutiest part of his lips. I suppose he’s too much of a gentleman to fully press them to my skin. 
“May I have this dance?” He asks, looking up at me through his eye lashes. So formal. Quickly glancing at Hyomin, she gives me an eager nod. I guess the servants will have something to gossip about later. At least that’ll replace the conversations about me and Yeonjun. 
“Yes, you may,” I say, returning the formality. We do all the obligatory dancing things—hand on my waist, mine around his neck, holding each other’s free hands. Slowly stepping with the classy romantic music of the string quintet, he admittedly looks stunning in his formal wear—baby blue with gold trim. The baby blue brings out the radiant sapphire undertones of his deep brown skin, the gold showcasing the warmth of his amber irises. 
“So,” he starts, his voice deep and rumbling. “Who am I dancing with?” 
Without any hesitation, I lie, “Charlotte.”
“Well, Charlotte,” he says. “You’re on Prince Yeonjun’s staff?” I blink up at him with confusion etched on my face. How did he— “The rose?” He asks, tilting his head toward my chest where a delicate ivory rose is pinned to my dress to differentiate us from the guests in case someone needs something from us. 
“Ah,” I giggle. “Yes. Yes, I am.” Where is he anyway? No. I’m not dancing with Prince Sipho to make Yeonjun jealous—I’m dancing with him because he’s hot, seems sweet, and seems to think I’m hot too. Why would he be watching anyway? This is his party. He’s probably busy schmoozing with some high-stakes donors or some other royals. 
Prince Sipho’s hand glides down to the spot right above my ass—he’s really testing the boundaries, huh? I love it. But guilt twinges my heart. Half of me hopes he isn’t watching this and the other half hopes he is. I don’t know which is worse. 
A loud crash brings the room to a halt and I try to locate where the accident is, but Hyomin waves me over. “Damn it,” I murmur. “I’ve gotta go…clean that up. Excuse me.”
After rushing to clean up the broken glass, I return the broom to the closet that’s three times the size of my bedroom. I take my time putting it back—a break from the hustle and bustle of the party is very much needed right now. The click of the deadbolt jolts my heart. 
A million things run through my mind. A creep is in here with me. Hyomin locked it from the outside and forgot about me and now I’m locked in until someone remembers to come get me. How long am I gonna be in here? Is someone in here with me?
“Hello.”
“Oh,” I say, relieved. “Hello, Sir.” I curtsy, tilting my head toward Prince Yeonjun as he steps into the light. Why is he in here anyway? I’ve been trying so hard to avoid him since the garden when we almost—nevermind. But he’s weaseled his way into my life. Telling the Queen I paint so I’d paint those portraits of them—yeah, I saw right through that bullshit. Bumping into me earlier tonight. But there’s nowhere to run now. We’re utterly alone. 
That’s terrifying. 
He’s never looked at me like this. Dark pupils dilated with lust and desire. It makes my heart race and I stumble back, tripping over some old cardboard boxes, but I catch myself on the countertop. 
Walking toward me, he keeps his hands in his pockets, but manages to box me in, cornering me and standing tall over me, intimidating and somehow…safe. I know he’d never hurt me. Physically at least. But I also can’t wait to see what he does next. 
“So it’s okay for you to dance with Prince Sipho but not me?” His voice grumbles with the low hum of the music right outside the door. 
“I’m not one of his servants,” I say matter-of-factly. “Why do you care anyway?” I ask cheekily as he creeps closer and closer. So close I’m fully backed into this counter now, almost sitting on top of it. “What are you—” 
“Can I kiss you?”
“No,” I answer quickly. 
“Mira…” he sighs. “How can you expect me not to kiss you when you look like that?” That makes me feel things all throughout my body that I definitely shouldn’t be feeling for ex-boyfriends, especially an ex-boyfriend that’s also my boss. And the prince of my country. 
My mouth parts and I swear I tried my best not to lick my lips. “Don’t kiss my mouth,” I say. I told Hyomin I haven’t kissed him in seven years. At least that’ll still be true after whatever happens next. 
Reaching for my hand with his white-glove-clad one, he places a gentle yet devastatingly sensual kiss to the back of it, looking up at me through his eyelashes like Prince Sipho did moments ago. But he had nowhere near the effect Yeonjun has on me. I bet he can smell the nail polish from when Hyomin painted it on my nails a few hours ago. As his perfect pouty lips kiss my hand, I can’t help but wonder how those lips would feel in other places. 
“You look—” he stops for another kiss on my palm. “Absolutely—” then the pulse-point of my wrist. “Stunning.” Then inside my elbow. Making his way up higher, my breath hitches in the back of my throat. “As usual,” he adds. 
That fucker. 
He’s always been like this. Silky smooth then sugary sweet. It gives me whiplash. 
Eventually, his lips explore my collarbone. “You’re so warm.” I don’t know how I got up here, but I’m fully sitting on the counter now. His hands are all over me—brushing my upper arms, grazing the smooth satin of the dress that covers my thighs, digging into the folds of my hips. 
How did this happen? How did I go from dancing with one Prince—a perfectly nice and gentlemanly prince—to sharing this romantic…something with Prince Yeonjun? Something because it’s not a kiss, it’s not more than a kiss, but it’s certainly not less than a kiss. It’s…something. 
His palm brushes the side of my breast and he stops himself from pushing any further before he whispers in my ear, “Can I touch you?”
“I think you already are.”
Firmly squeezing my tit over my dress, I groan as my back arches. Oh my fucking god. Is this real?
Something in his body language switches at the sound of my groaning and he drops everything to get to his knees. He pushes the skirt of my dress up and past my thighs, looking up at me for permission.
Is he…? 
My pussy clenches around nothing at the sheer thought of those gorgeous plump lips around my clit. I let him explore further with his lips without any hesitation whatsoever. Then they’re inside my thighs, slowly moving closer where I desperately need him. Nerves fill my stomach. Flashbacks of other guys going to taste me and not liking what they find enter my mind. Is that gonna happen with him? Is he gonna be turned off by my hair? My stretch marks? The way my fat thighs cover his ears?
As much as my inner feminist hates those thoughts, there’s always that twinge of embarrassment that I still haven’t managed to work through. 
“Yeonjun…” I sigh. “You don’t have to.”
“What if I want to?” He asks. “Do you want me to?” Obviously. I nod. Pressing his lips to the outside of my panties, he breathes me in and I realize he’s never been this close to me. Ever. 
Sure, we’ve kissed, but we were teenagers, we had no idea what we were doing. It never got this far. Never got past the occasional makeout session on my picnic blanket under the willow tree. “You smell so good.”
I roll my eyes. “Oh, shut up.”
“I’m serious. You smell delicious.” 
Lips delicate and careful, he takes his time. I never thought this is how it would be with him. I always thought of him as the kind of guy to get straight to it. At least that’s how I imagined it—him embracing me because he couldn’t take it anymore, he needed me right then and there. Whisking me off to his bedroom to undress me, never careful, never delicate. 
But I love it. Love taking a deep breath, letting my head lull back onto the wall behind me, my entire body relaxing. The feeling of a tongue flicking my clit for the first time in months, and the first time it’s his tongue. I card my hand through his hair, gripping some strands between my fingers. Mouth dropping open, I sigh, looking down at him, eyes closed, fully entranced by my taste. Thank fuck he knows exactly what he’s doing now. 
The softness of his white cotton gloves feels like heaven against the heat of my thighs, but I’d be lying if I said I didn’t want his bare hands on me. 
Like a mind-reader, he plucks his gloves off, one finger at a time, putting me under a spell as he goes. I stare at him as he loosens the glove by pulling on the pointer finger, then the middle, the ring, his pinky, then tugging it all the way off. It’s so sexy. I think I caught a small smirk, but it's just dark enough for it to be hidden. 
The tip of his finger teases my entrance and I can tell— “Fuck,” he gasps. “You’re so wet, darling.”
Don’t call me that. But I can’t bring myself to say it out loud…I’m not even sure I’d mean it if I did. He finally pushes his finger all the way inside me, curling the tip of it to find just the right spot that makes me absolutely moan. He lets go of my skirt to grip my thighs, finally feeling him squeeze and touch me after all these years of wanting him. I beg myself not to stop him and make him touch me everywhere before continuing. 
My pointer fingers graces his and he intertwines his fingers with mine. Something this intimate only happens between lovers, right? Holding hands while fucking in the closet when there’s a party right outside the door? I can’t decide if this is the dirtiest thing I’ve ever done or if it’s the most romantic thing. 
Arguing with myself internally, a second finger breaches my entrance, filling me even more so than before. He’s incredible…almost skillful with his fingers. It’s sexy. And exciting. 
Expertly flicking his tongue, he finds the perfect spot with his fingertips, forcing me to buck my hips…fuck I’m so close already. How did he do this to me?
“Please…”
Everything comes to a halt. “Please what?”
“Fuck, Yeonjun, don’t do that to me.” 
“Don’t do what to you? Get you to talk to me?” I look down, defeated. How am I supposed to respond to that? Is that the only reason he’s doing this? Because I’ve been avoiding him and this was the only way he could think of to get me to talk to him? “Tell me what you want. What are you asking for?” Oh. It’s like that. Okay. 
“Please…” It’s already unbelievable that we’re doing this in a closet with a party going on outside. Prince Yeonjun is on his knees for me. And he’s making me beg? I can hardly take it. “Uh…” I stutter, trying to close my legs instinctively. He backs off, eyebrows furrowed. He’s worried about me. I didn’t mean it like that. “You’re not finished yet, are you?” I ask, pushing him back closer with my heel. 
“I’ll finish when you tell me what you want.”
Gracing my finger under his chin, I force him to look at me in the eye before saying, “Make me come. I need it so bad. Please.”  
Cocking his head to the side, he says, “I’ve always wanted to hear you beg for me.” 
My chest heaves as he dives back in for more, flicking his tongue the way I love, thrusting his fingers in and out of me. 
“Fuck, you feel good.” 
“You are delicious.” I’d love it if he could talk to me the way I—and hopefully he—likes. Dirty, up close and in my ear, but this’ll have to do for now. He can get to the real good stuff later. Will there be a later though? 
A white-hot feeling that someone hasn’t made me feel in quite some time quickly approaches. Deep in the pit of my stomach, it bubbles as my body tenses, breath shallow and quick. It builds and builds until all I want to hear him say is Come for me, darling. I know you’re so close. But I know he won’t. He has to stick to the matter at hand. 
With a sharp inhale, I moan and whimper, euphoria washing over me as my thighs tighten around his head. I’m not sure I’ve ever felt this good. He’s incredibly talented—like I said, he’s an all or nothing kinda guy and I love that about him. 
“Fuck. Oh my god,” I gasp, my hips rolling needing more, more, more. Goddamn, I’m in trouble. “Holy shit.” I trail off, my breathing shallow. My eyes squeeze shut as my head drops back before my body starts flinching. “Thank you, Sir.”
My body goes slack as he slows down. Once I catch my breath, my eyes flutter open to see him looking at me with a cheeky smirk. He’s so fucking smug. 
“Sir?” 
Shit. That is just about the most embarrassing thing that’s ever happened to me. I’ve been correcting myself for weeks, reminding myself to call him Prince Yeonjun, Your Majesty, Sir. I know he hates when I call him that, even in normal scenarios. I can’t imagine how mad he is now that I’ve called him that while giving me an orgasm. Not just any orgasm, though. One of the best I’ve had in months. All while wearing our formal wear too. Fuck, he looks so sexy in his uniform. Especially with it slightly disheveled, hair messy, gloves off. 
“It must’ve slipped.”
He simply stands, darkness and lust still in his eyes as his hands grip my hips, squeezing harshly before moving them up further to my waist. His right hand trails up even higher, cupping my face to force my ear to line up with his lips. “Call me that again next time.” Next time? There’s gonna be a next time? “Got it?”
Speechless, I compose myself before whispering, “Yes, Sir.”  
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cw. cunnilingus, mentions of previous bjs and hand jobs, mira is described as chubby/fat/curvy in a good way, hickeys, biting, masturbation.
YEONJUN'S POV
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“Mira,” I say simply as she walks by me looking gorgeous as always. Since our little rendezvous in the butler’s closet last month, we’ve “seen” each other several times since, each meeting ending with at least one of us coming. Nothing beyond oral and hand stuff—we still haven’t kissed or seen each other fully naked yet—but even so, it’s been amazing. She’s so good at it all. The teasing, the touching, the talking, all of it. I don’t think I can pick a favorite moment.
Maybe when she asked me to give her hickeys on the inside of her thighs. Her whispering, Give me hickeys, please…wanna look down and imagine you’re there after you’re gone. Oof. Chills. 
Or maybe when she laid her back against my chest and I rubbed her clit so perfectly, she dug her nails into my forearm for dear life, so hard it broke skin. I had to wear long sleeves for three days. 
Perhaps her seeing my cock for the first time, eyes wide as she said Oh my god, Sir. You have a beautiful cock. No one’s ever called me beautiful before, let alone my dick. That made me giddier than I even thought possible. 
“Yeon—Sir,” she quickly corrects herself in case anyone’s listening. Glancing around, we’re the only ones nearby. “You look nice. New uniform jacket?” I nod. 
Tonight’s occasion is much less grand than our first night together. A simple gathering with a few royals. It was the high-stakes donors I was hoping to get some money from tonight, but they’re all donationed-out it seems. 
“You look…” I look over her, never subtle about ogling her. “Absolutely stunning. New dress?” She subtly tilts her head. I stuff my hands in my pockets. What’s the point of delaying it any more? “I need to taste you again.”
“Already? You ate me out yesterday.”
“What can I say?” I chuckle. “I’ve got a craving.” She takes a deep breath before nodding at me, not changing her facial expression. “Closet, five minutes?” 
The closet isn’t the only place we’ve had our meetings but it is definitely our most frequented spot. Honorable mentions include the library, the sunroom, and under the willow tree where she laid back against me. That was only once but it was magical. 
As she turns away, I can’t help but wonder what the rest of her looks like. She’s got what feels like the most perfect ass, but I still haven’t gotten a good look at it. And her tits…good lord what I’d give to bury my face between her bare tits. 
“Prince Yeonjun?”
“Ah, Prince Sipho,” I say, returning his bow. “Nice to see you again.” He holds his hands behind him and maintains his intimidating eye contact. “I hope you’re enjoying dinner.”
“Can I ask for a favor?” He asks, almost urgently. 
“Sure.”
“I saw you were talking to Charlotte,” he says. “I danced with her last month and I never got her phone number.” His expression softens. “I realize how awkward and potentially inappropriate this is considering she’s on your staff. Would you mind providing me with her phone number?”
“I’m sorry,” I begin. “I don’t think I know a Charlotte.”
“You were just speaking with her,” he says matter-of-factly. “Right over there.” He tilts his head in the direction of…Mira? Happily prancing off in the direction of the closet. Our closet. Oh no. 
I suppose I should’ve seen this coming. Someone was bound to be interested in her at some point. I just didn’t think my competition would be another handsome prince. What am I saying? Competition? Stop being such an ass.
“You can ask her yourself, you know.” 
“Fair enough.”
“I don’t think now’s a good time though,” I rush to say, stopping him in his tracks before he turns around. “She’s busy. I just sent her to do a task.”
“Then I suppose you should give me her number now, then?”
After a few seconds of awkward silence, I finally speak up to say, “I’ll talk to her first. You know, make sure she’s comfortable with me giving out her phone number.”
“Of course.” He tilts his head and walks away. My mind races with questions. Did he sweep her off her feet? Have they slept together? Or worse: have they kissed? Why does he think her name is Charlotte? But I’ve gotta get back to the matter at hand.
“You’re already ready for me, hm?” I ask, seeing her proudly sitting on the countertop, waiting for me. She nods cutely, wiggling her feet back and forth. Locking the door, I take my gloves off one finger at a time before stuffing them in my pocket for safe keeping. Then I loosen my collar a bit, something I know she thinks is hot, so I always make a show out of it just for her. 
As I step closer, she grips the edge of the counter so tightly the veins on the back of her hand pop out. She crosses her ankles and looks down briefly but puts on a brave face to stare me in the eye. Wrapping my arms around her, I bury my face in her neck and breathe her in. 
“You smell so good.” I’ve noticed she’s started wearing a specific perfume for special occasions—the gala last month, dinners like these, she even wore it once when she shyly asked me to eat her out again on a random Tuesday. 
“Thank you, Sir.” Never taking my lips off her neck, I feel all over her, albeit over her dress, but she feels lovely. Dropping to my knees, I lift her skirt up to access her thighs with my lips, placing kisses everywhere. And there they are—those gorgeous hickeys I gave her last week. Still there. I swipe my thumb across one before biting her skin gently.
“Can I ask you something?” She hums as I move closer and closer to her center. Glancing up at her, her eyelids have fluttered shut and her hands are in my hair. “Do you know Prince Sipho?” Her hands stop.
“I know of him,” she says plainly. “Why?”
“No reason,” I say, nudging her thigh with my nose to encourage her to open wider. I add, “Said he danced with you and I guess he likes you.” I place a kiss on the outside of her thong right between her pussy lips. “Asked me for your phone number.”
“Did you give it to him?”
“No.”
“...Oh.” She leans back, resting her hands behind her back for support. Is that a good oh or a bad oh?
“He thinks your name’s Charlotte though.” I chuckle. “What’s that about?”
“I don’t know,” she says awkwardly while I dig my fingers into her thong, pulling it down her legs, still watching her body language carefully. “That’s weird.” 
“Mira.”
“Fine.” She rolls her eyes, but still welcomes my lips around her pussy. “I dunno—I wasn’t interested so I gave him a fake name. Doesn’t everyone do that?”
“Mm…I suppose,” I say, spreading her lips to flick my tongue against her clit. Fuck, she tastes amazing. Every fucking time. Her hand flies to my hair again, taking quick breaths. “Why wouldn’t you be interested in him?” 
“Can we not talk about Prince Sipho while you’re eating me out, please?”
“I was just curious.” 
Why wouldn’t she be interested, though? He’s definitely her type—tall, handsome, smart, royal. 
Images of them dancing together, arms wrapped around each other, his hand sliding further down her back make my vision red. 
Maybe she’s interested in someone else with those same qualities, perhaps even more devastatingly handsome than him. And hilarious, might I add. 
But thinking about her dancing with Sipho while thinking about me makes me giddy. When else does she think about me? When she’s eating breakfast? Doing her chores? Getting ready to go to bed? In the shower? When she touches herself? Oh. That sends shivers down my spine. 
“How often do you think about me, Mira?”
“What do you mean?”
“I mean, when do you think about me?”
She takes a deep breath, letting her head fall back against the wall, the slightest smile flashing over her lips before she says, “When I’m horny.”
“So you think about me when you touch yourself?” 
Her fingers stop again and she looks up, eyes wide like I caught her doing something she shouldn’t have been. I’d never let her see it, but I’m giggling on the inside. She’s so cute. 
“Um,” she clears her throat. “I guess, yeah.” There’s a looming awkward silence while I keep licking her. She’s trying not to react to how good it feels. Trying not to give in. 
“Well, go on.”
“What?” Mira asks. 
“Tell me,” I say. “Tell me exactly what you think about.” She takes a deep breath to collect herself, like she’s trying to hold back her noises and movements. I don’t like that she feels the need to do that with me. If anything, I crave hearing and feeling them. “It’s okay, you can tell me anything.”
Her breath hitches, eyes flitting away before locking back to mine. "I think about you touching me," she admits quietly, but I can tell she’s gaining confidence. "The way you did the first time.” She bites her lip, her cheeks flushing a deeper shade of pink. "I think about your hands on my body," she continues. "The way you knew exactly where to touch me, how to make me feel..."
"How to make you feel what?" I prompt, my hands gently caressing her thighs, urging her to keep going while my mouth is nowhere near her pussy.
"How to make me feel good," she breathes out, her eyes closing as she loses herself in the memory and the feeling of my tongue on her clit. 
“Do you miss it? ” I ask, my breath hot against her skin. "Do you miss me when I’m gone and can’t make you feel good?”
She nods, her breath sharp and quick. "Yes," she murmurs, her voice trembling with desire. "I miss it so much." My hands continue to explore her body, relearning every curve and contour, desperate to rip this dress off her, but we haven’t crossed that boundary yet. 
"What else do you think about?" I ask, my voice a gentle command.
“The way you taste.”
"And how do I taste?" I ask, my lips ghosting over her skin, teasing her with the promise of more.
"Salty," she whispers, her voice hitching. I can’t tell if she means— “That’s a good thing.” I smile against her skin, relieved while my hands squeeze her thighs. “But I mostly think about your mouth. How good you are at this. Those hickeys you gave me have certainly come in handy.” 
“How so?” I slide two fingers inside her and her breath gets quicker. 
Groaning, she says, “Looking down at them turns me on so much.” She swipes her hand across them. “Thinking about us sneaking around like this. It makes me feel…dirty.” She giggles. “Is that cheesy?” I shake my head and start licking her clit again. “They need to stop assigning me tasks while you’re around.” I hum in question. “The other day they made me clean the studio while you were in your pottery lesson—why it couldn’t wait, I don’t know—but it was too much,” she says. “Watching you with your sleeves pushed up, your hands on the clay, oh my god, you were so hot. You had me hot and bothered all day long.”
I genuinely had no idea. She does a great job of hiding that. Little does she know, I was stealing glances of her that whole lesson—I don’t remember a single word my instructor said. The only thing I was looking at was her body, her curvy thighs, full breasts, squishy tummy, the greatest ass I’ve ever seen and I haven’t even seen it bare yet. “What did you do afterward?”
She hesitates, tensing up, holding back. “I don’t wanna say.”
I stop in my tracks. “Tell me.”
“No,” she whines. “Don’t make me.” Refusing to speak or look down at me, I pull away from her, looking at her like, I’m not gonna keep going until you tell me. With an insatiable eye roll, she finally speaks up, “I thought about you.” I look at her again like, That’s not enough and you know it. “Fine,” she says. Of course, if this truly bothered her, she knows our safe word. Tapping her fingers on the counter before bashfully looking away, she admits, “I thought about you while I touched myself.”
Satisfied, I give her a kitten lick on her clit, making her gasp. 
“I, uh…I looked at myself in the bathroom mirror, at the hickeys you gave me.” I start licking more and more, rewarding her for talking. “I thought about what it would look like if someone walked in on us while you did this to me. Or what someone would think if they saw the hickeys you gave me.”
Her hips start to roll and I know I can’t speak anymore. Because that would mean taking my mouth off her pussy, which neither of us want. Instead, my grip on the fat of her thighs gets harsher and I stay steady with my mouth, knowing this is the exact speed and pressure she needs. 
“I thought about you ripping my dress off but then slowing down to take my thong and bra off,” she says. Well, that’s new. We’ve never mentioned anything further than this. Does she want something more than this? 
“About you pressing your bare chest against mine,” she adds breathlessly. “You licking my tits.” Her thoughts and words start speeding up, like she’s telling me not to stop no matter what. “You tapping my clit with your cock.” Oh my god. She wants to do things like that with me? Fuck. I can’t show how giddy that makes me, not right now at least. 
Her hands hold onto my hair for dear life. Her moans pitch up and increase speed, like a chant, getting louder and louder. “You fucking me from behind,” she says. “Fucking me so good I can hardly take it.” She’s so close. “Until—until…” She's panting, clearly right on the verge of reaching her orgasm. “I’m coming so good for you,” she whispers breathlessly. I can feel it when her thighs tremble, when her clit pulsates against my tongue, when her nails dig into my scalp. 
Catching her breath after she comes, she finishes off with a sweet, “Thank you, Sir.”
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cw. more yeonjun environmental activist, suggestive, cheesy idk. 
MIRA'S POV
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“I can’t believe you did this,” I spit at Yeonjun, messily packing my old beat up carry-on. He refolds one of my t-shirts and hands it to me. 
“I thought you’d be excited to go.” 
Scoffing, I put a fist on my hip and face him. “I’m going as your servant.” He rolls his eyes before shoving his hands in his pockets. “All the other servants already think there’s something going on between us. Requesting me for your dumb business trip is gonna look suspicious.”
“Dumb?” He’s visibly offended. “This is an important business trip for me.”
“Still. They won’t shut up about this for months and you know it.”
“I thought you said there was nothing to talk about,” he says smugly, but I ignore him. “Look, I knew you wouldn’t act all servant-y the whole time, okay? Mother insists I take someone, but I’m a grown-up. I can do things on my own,” he says. “I knew you would be…normal, I don’t know. You wouldn’t curtsy, be on edge, or call me Sir.”
I stop in my tracks to look him in the eye and ask, “Except for when you want me to, right?” I hadn’t thought about what we might do at the hotel while we’re gone. Would he invite me to his room so he could taste me? Would he surprise me with a knock on my door? Would he text me to meet him somewhere else? I don’t know but I admit I’m excited to find out. 
The next morning, I hoist my suitcase into the trunk of the town car while the chauffeur, Eston, opens the door for me. I’m greeted with a sleepy “Morning,” from Yeonjun as he hands me a travel mug full of coffee that I didn’t ask for, but I’m definitely grateful for. 
“We’re taking the same car?”
“Of course,” he says. “Less cars on the road.”
Oh my god, he looks so cute with his sleepy eyes and messy hair. Although he flies commercial everywhere he goes, he wears every disguise possible: hat, face mask, hoodie with the hood up, you name it. We get to go through security privately though, which is nice. 
After our long flight, I want nothing more than to crash into a nice, warm bed—actually, any bed will do. It’s still light, but it’s evening and I’m ready to go to bed early. While he handles check-in, I scroll through my phone—international data plan paid for by the Queen, thank you very much. 
On the elevator, I ask , “Which floor am I on?” 
“Seven.” I nod, reaching for the seven button on the elevator, but it only goes up to six. There’s only one above it, which is labeled ‘Penthouse.’
Wait. “Did you only get one room?”
“Well…”
“Yeonjun!” I scream-whisper. “What is wrong with you? What did you think—”
He holds his hands up to clarify, “It has two rooms, okay? I wasn’t trying to…I dunno, make anything happen. It seemed easier.” 
The room is truly magnificent. Luxurious gold silk drapes frame the windows to let light flood the room. Sofas and armchairs surround a marble fireplace—cozy yet regal, just how Yeonjun likes it. An intricately carved coffee table sits in the middle of the room holding a vase of fresh flowers. There’s even a piano sitting in the corner. 
The view from the terrace takes my breath away. The gorgeous blues of Lake Geneva and the snow-capped alps are gorgeous. The air is crisp and clean and refreshes my lungs from the inside out. I lean on the railing, letting the cool breeze brush against my face as calmness washes over me.
“Gorgeous, huh?” Yeonjun asks as he stands beside me, his eyes scanning the horizon. 
“This is fucking incredible,” I say, my gaze never waiving from the beauty of the landscape. 
“I knew you’d like it,” he says. I glance over at him and he gives me a warm smile. 
“You’ve been here?”
“I’ve never stayed in this hotel, but I’ve been to Geneva, yes.” 
There’s a silence. Like we both know we want to do something, but we’re unsure of exactly what. Go in for a hug? No. Let him wrap his arm around me? No. Kiss him? Absolutely not. We can’t fall into that relationship space. The tension presses down on us, unspoken but palpable.
“Well, I’m exhausted,” he says, breaking the silence. “Did you wanna take a shower first or…?” 
“You can go ahead,” I say as I walk through the room, planning to unpack a bit first. Extending my suitcase’s handle, I ask, “Where’s the other room?” He grimaces, avoiding my gaze. “What?”
“Don’t be mad,” he starts, but I’m already visibly mad. “I must’ve looked at the website wrong.” I brace for the inevitable while he braces for my reaction. “This is it.”
“Seriously, Yeonjun? One bed?.” This is not gonna turn into a cheesy only-one-bed-left story. Nope. I won’t let it. “You better get me another room.”
“I already called and they’re out.” I’m fuming. “I’ll sleep on the couch,” he says. My face softens. I didn’t necessarily want that. “Really, it’s okay.”
“Yeonjun,” I say, guilt in my voice. 
“Mira, it’s fine. Really. It was my mistake, so I’ll take the couch.” 
“Okay,” I say. “I guess you can’t do stuff on your own, then, huh?”
-
The next morning, I wake up in this giant bed. Alone. The smell of coffee is already wafting through the air. Stretching under the covers, I sit up to see Yeonjun on the terrace, reading a newspaper. Not on his phone—a literal printed newspaper. I don't even know where he got it. 
An adorable little prince sitting there with his luxurious silk PJs, fuzzy slippers, messy hair, and the cutest pair of glasses anyone’s ever seen. Before joining him, I pull a hoodie over my tank top.
“Aren’t I supposed to get you your coffee?” I ask, admiring the view of the lake. 
“When you wake up on time, yes,” he says, not looking up from his paper while he pushes up his glasses. 
“I…I’m sorry,” I say, forcing myself back into my professional persona. 
“No, it’s okay,” he chuckles, sitting his coffee on the coaster and looking at me. “I wasn’t trying to be bossy. You seemed like you needed sleep. And I can get my own coffee,” he says. “Besides, today is a day off. You can get me coffee tomorrow.” I nod. “Did you have plans today?”
“I dunno…maybe I’ll draw by the lake or something.” 
“I’m kayaking on the lake and having a picnic lunch if you want to join me,” he suggests. “You can bring your sketchbook.”
-
The lake shimmers like a bed of gems, crystal-clear waters reflecting the sunlight in brilliant shades of blue. As we paddle alongside each other, our rowing is rhythmic until we reach a small pebbled shore on the other side of the lake.
Yeonjun jumps out first, standing up in the water to pull his kayak to shore. He’s so charming with his crocs and shorts short enough to expose his muscular thighs. The t-shirt he’s got on is somehow the hottest thing I’ve ever seen him wear, perfectly accentuating his pecs and clinging to his biceps. And the cutest lake hat sits on his head, making me absolutely giddy. 
Without having to ask, he pulls my kayak in so I don’t need to step in the water or pull it up myself. He offers his hand to me with a smile, my fingers lingering a bit too long after I stand to my feet. 
While I set up the blanket on the pebbled shore, I ask, “What’s tomorrow’s meeting about?”
His eyes light up while he unpacks our picnic. "Tomorrow's meeting is with the Global Environment Facility," he begins, settling back against the kayak, pouring some juice into two glasses. "We're discussing several things, but we’ll be focusing on keeping our water clean.” He tilts his head toward the sparkling Lake Geneva in front of us, its pristine waters a reminder of the importance of this endeavor. "Access to clean water is a fundamental human right," he says passionately. “But there’s so much…crap in them. You know 26% of the world doesn’t have access to safe drinking water?” My eyes widen. “And so many beautiful oceans and rivers and lakes like this one keep getting trashed.” 
His dedication is contagious, and I find myself leaning in, captivated by his words. "It's more than policies and proposals," he continues. "It's about creating real, tangible changes that will protect our planet.” He smiles, a mix of determination and hope in his expression. "I mean, I dunno…it’s a big goal I guess,” he says, glancing down in embarrassment. 
“Seems like you’re actually doing something about it.”
“We’re at least trying to make change happen.”
Sitting on the blanket, I fest my legs out in front of me with my hands supporting me from behind. He hands me a glass while he sits criss-cross next to me. “You seem really passionate about it,” I say. 
“I am,” he nods.
A comfortable silence settles over us as we enjoy our meal. Afterward, he takes his book out of his backpack, reclining back to rest his head against the kayak. I take out my sketchbook and pencils, setting it up against my knees and thighs. 
I try to focus on capturing the serenity of the lake, but my eyes keep drifting to him. His presence is so comforting and I’m reminded of that every time we’re alone like this. Watching him, I can’t help but think about what it would feel like to rest my cheek against his chest. Warm. Strong. Safe. 
“Yeonjun?”
“Hm?” He looks up at me from under his hat, but I don’t know what to say. After a few seconds of silence, he sits up completely and asks, “What’s wrong?”
“Nothing,” I stutter, returning to my drawing. 
An hour or so passes—I’ve made great progress on my drawing and it seems like he made a nice dent in his book, but the sun’s setting fast. 
“We should probably go soon,” he notes. “We shouldn’t kayak in the dark and it’ll probably take an hour to get back.”
-
“Everything okay?” Yeonjun asks, startling me on the terrace. I hum, avoiding looking at him. He looks too good after showers—hair damp and skin pink from the hot water—so I better not take a peek. I’ve clipped my wet hair up—it holds its waves better that way. 
“I’m finishing up this drawing I started at the lake. Adding some watercolor.” 
“Is that me?” He asks, pulling the other seat around to sit next to me. 
“Yeah,” I nod awkwardly. “I just drew what I saw.” I say, giving in and glancing at him while he smiles to himself as he examines the art. 
Seconds pass before he adds, “I had a lot of fun today.”
“Me too,” I say, my arms crossed. He’s so, so close to me. 
“Yeah?” I hum. “Since you showed me this,” he says, gesturing to the drawing. “I’ll show you this picture I took of you,” he says, reaching for his phone in his pocket. Leaning even closer to me, I feel his warmth. I must say I look pretty. My hair’s windswept, I have a nice pink in my cheeks, and I look genuinely happy looking out over the water. His fingers mindlessly touch mine while he looks at me. “Thank you for coming with me,” he says. “You know, on the picnic.”
“No worries,” I say. 
“I think I’m gonna head to bed,” he says, not moving an inch. Oh my god, he looks so kissable right now. I can’t believe how long we’ve gone without kissing each other even once. I didn’t think we’d last one week after we started…whatever we’re doing. Hooking up? 
Regardless, I’m relieved. We should not be starting something right now. He’s my boss. My boss and my ex that broke my heart. 
But we’re leaning in closer and closer, like we’re about to—don’t you dare. I catch myself first. 
“You can, uh…you can sleep in the bed with me if you want,” I whisper. He shakes his head and starts to protest. “Really, it’s okay. Swear. It’s a huge bed.”
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cw. brief mention of the death of a grandparent, yeonjun environmental activist, eating food.
YEONJUN'S POV
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As I make my way toward the grand conference hall, the weight of responsibility settles on my shoulders like a heavy cloak. Today's meeting is a pivotal moment in my advocacy work and I need to be right on. I love this though. Speaking for what I believe in. Convincing people. And admittedly, sounding smart, which I am.
Glancing over my shoulder, Mira follows close behind me, which is what she’s meant to be doing. It still sends shivers down my spine. Our return to our professional roles after our idyllic kayaking excursion feels strange, but duty calls and we both have our parts to play. I square my shoulders and quicken my pace, the marble floors echoing under my feet. 
With a final glance back at Mira, she offers an encouraging smile and asks, “Ready?” I take a deep breath. “You’re gonna be great.” She opens the door and I step into the grandeur of the conference room. The air is charged with energy, a palpable sense of purpose radiating throughout the room. 
Taking my place at the head of the table, pride and excitement surges through me. This is it—the moment I’ve been preparing for, the chance to make a real difference.
-
Coming back home—hotel room—I’m exhausted but exhilarated. As I’m about to collapse onto the couch, a knock at the living room entryway wakes me up. 
“You hungry?” Mira asks, flipping through the room service menu. 
“Order whatever you like.”
“What would you like?”
“Anything’s fine. I’m not picky.”
After she places the order on the phone, we chat about the meeting a bit, but it isn’t long before the conversation gets lighter. We laugh about our kayaking adventure yesterday, recalling the near-disaster when I almost tripped into the water face first. The room service arrives promptly, and we dig into our meal. 
"So, tell me," she says between bites of her spaghetti, "what got you interested in environmental advocacy in the first place?"
I lean back, chewing the bite of pizza in thought. "I guess it started when I was a kid. You remember how much I loved nature even back then.” She nods. “Whenever I got stressed, I’d go outside—you know, for a walk, camping, whatever, and one day, I looked around and only saw wealthy people and it was one of those moments where I realized how lucky I am,” I say, not breaking eye contact. “Access to nature is a fundamental human right. It’s already inaccessible to many and it’s only getting worse.”
She nods. “It's easy to take it for granted.”
“It was something I’d never thought about,” I chuckle. “I was a fucking prick back then.”
“Yeah,” she agrees, a little too easily. She’s not wrong though.
“As I got older, I started to see the impact of pollution and climate change. I knew I had to do something, even if it was just a small part."
We continue talking late into the night, sharing stories and dreams, discovering new facets of each other's personalities. It’s in these quiet moments I cherish that I get to see some real parts of her, like in the garden, when she painted my portrait, when we went kayaking. 
“What’s something you’re passionate about?” I ask. She presses her lips together and shakes her head. “Nah, come on, you gotta be passionate about something.” Shrugging, she shakes her head. “How about your art?”
Smiling to herself, she asks, “What about it?”
“Why are you an artist?”
She leans back, tracing patterns of the fabric on the couch with her finger. "This is cheesy but when I look around, I see colors, shapes, emotions. When I draw or paint or whatever, it's like I'm putting pieces together, creating something whole. It’s not about making something beautiful, but capturing a moment or a feeling, things I can’t say out loud,” she says, glancing around the room bashfully. “Or whatever.”
“Not or whatever. You need to give yourself more credit.”
She nods shyly, looking down with a grin. "I remember this painting I did. It was of an old barn, you know, out of town a bit. Everyone thought it was just a pretty picture of decay. But it was about resilience, how even in decay, there’s a story that refuses to be forgotten, even if it can’t speak for itself or if no one’s listening but me.” I nod. “That’s what I really love. Finding those moments that only a few people notice. It’s like saying, ‘Hey, I see you and I feel this too.’” That’s amazing. She’s never spoken so candidly like this with me before. “Like when you asked if I was gonna paint your freckle and your birthmark, like, of course I am! That’s a part of you and I see you, you know?”
I chuckle with her. “Do you have a favorite piece?”
She thinks for a moment. “Probably a painting I did of my grandmother’s hands. She was a seamstress, and her hands were always so busy, always creating. When she wasn’t sewing, she was sketching, measuring, creating patterns. It was my way of honoring her, capturing her essence. Her hands have so many stories to tell.”
“That’s sweet.”
“Yeah.” She nods. “She was the one person in my family I really wanted you to meet back then.”
“Invite her over for dinner some time,” I suggest. 
“She, uh,” She clears her throat. “She passed a couple years ago.”
“I’m so sorry.” She waves her hand. “I would’ve loved to have met her.”
“It’s okay.” But her eyes are tearing up just a bit. She blinks them away and adds, “She meant so much to me, but I guess that’s…how things go.”
“Where’s that painting now?”
“It’s back home, like, my home home, not the castle.” 
“I’d love to see it.”
“I’ll find it the next time I go back home and bring it back with me.” As the conversation winds down, we sit in comfortable silence as the city lights cast a soft glow through the window. "I should probably let you get some rest," Mira says, breaking the silence.
I nod, feeling a pang of reluctance. "Yeah, we have another busy day tomorrow."
She stands up, but before she leaves, she turns to me, her expression gentle. "Goodnight, Yeonjun. And thank you for tonight. It was nice to just...talk."
"It was,” I reply. “Let's do it again sometime."
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cw. cunnilingus, protected sex, mira’s body is described as squishy/chubby in a good way, mention of moles and vvv brief mention of armpits, toys, body worship, masturbation, pet names (darling, love, babe, baby).
YEONJUN'S POV
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After another grueling meeting, I’ve ditched my tie and unbuttoned a few of my shirt buttons while Mira has completely changed into lounge clothes back at the hotel room. Out of the corner of my eye, I sense her watching me, leaning up against the wall. But I let it slide. I don’t think she realizes how often she does it. 
“How did today’s meeting go?” She asks. 
“You were there.”
“I know, but how did it go from your perspective?”
I take a deep breath, feeling the weight of the day's events fresh in my mind. "It was intense," I start, a mix of relief and excitement in my voice. "We covered a lot of ground. Like I said, we talked about keeping waters clean.”
“Did you all come up with any new ideas?"
"Actually, yes," I say, a spark of enthusiasm igniting. "We talked about implementing advanced watershed management and enhancing wastewater treatment technologies. But what really stood out was the proposal for a global initiative to reduce industrial runoff. It's ambitious, but the potential impact is huge."
She nods, clearly intrigued. "Was everyone on board?"
"For the most part," I reply, recalling the lively debates. "There were a few moments of contention, especially when it came to funding, so I’ll be doing a lot of fundraising for awhile, but everyone agreed they seem like good ideas.”
Mira's smile is warm and encouraging. "I'm glad it went well.” Her words, simple yet heartfelt, warm me up. She finally pipes up again to add, “You looked hot up there.” 
I chuckle. “Yeah?” She nods. “What makes you say that?”
“Oh, I don’t know,” she starts, walking closer to me. “How smart and passionate you are. That’s hot.” That is exactly what I was hoping she’d say. I kept catching myself stealing glances of her during the meetings. It was hard to tell if she was looking at me to look at me or because that’s technically her job. Even if it is her job, I can tell between her different looks—her checking in look, her secretly admiring me look, and her I need you and I need you now look, which might be my favorite.
The look she’s got on her face is starting to lean toward that last one, but she’s not quite there yet. I only observe, let her fall into that place if she wants to.
“Well, thank you,” I tilt my head in her direction before the piano behind her catches my attention. “You know, I’ve been taking piano lessons.” She hums. Sometimes I forget it's also her job to know everything about me—everything about my schedule and activities at least. “You still like classical music, right?” She nods gently, a slight smile constantly on her lips. 
I’m not the best at piano, so I start fumbling through Moonlight Sonata. Giggling through every wrong note, she brushes some hair away from my face. 
“Ah, I need the sheet music,” I say quietly. Wiping my sweaty palms on my thighs, I know she’s still staring at me with look number three: I need you and I need you now. All professionalism has gone out the window. The biker shorts she’s wearing outlines her stomach perfectly, her thighs barely bulge at the hem, and her tank top accentuates her breasts beautifully. She’s a stunner. 
I reach for her hand and drag my thumb across her knuckles. My hands rest against the backs of her thighs, pulling her closer so she steps between my legs, my hand moving to her backside, squeezing her so deliciously. Her hands rest on my shoulders as I bury my nose between her breasts, taking a deep breath. She always smells so goddamn amazing. 
“I need you,” she whispers as her fingertips drag across my scalp. 
“I know, darling.”
“No,” she chuckles. “I need more from you this time,” she says breathlessly. I stand up straight, looking down at her as she looks at me through her eyelashes. “I need you inside me. Please.” 
“Of course,” I say, diving straight for her lips, but she turns her head, so my lips crash into her cheek. 
“Did I say you could kiss me?” Picking her up, I let my face rest in her chest again as I carry her to the bed, praying I don’t trip over anything along the way. As I sit her down on the mattress, she says, “Kiss me everywhere but my mouth, okay? Everywhere.” 
I don’t wanna argue with the no kissing rule right now, so I simply nod, covering her neck with kisses while I tug her shorts off her legs. Holding her leg by her ankle, I press my lips to it, trailing it all the way up to her thigh while her hand slips under her thong. I’m looking over her body, closing my eyes for a few seconds at a time, but I can feel her eyes on me. 
“Everywhere, babe,” she reminds me. Babe? I decide not to mention it—don’t ruin the moment. I slowly lift her shirt, but she gets impatient and takes it off herself, throwing it somewhere before tugging at the hem of mine, hinting at me to ditch it. 
My lips land right above her bra, kissing and nipping the tops of her breasts. I literally can’t wait to see her completely, so I waste no time in snapping it off and taking a second to admire her. Then, I gently kiss her neck and feel her whole body with my hands. Warm, soft, welcoming, curvy, squishy, perfect. 
When I squeeze her tit for the first time, she moans, arching her back while I sloppily stamp her collarbone with my lips. I want nothing more than to lick her nipples—it’s all I’ve thought about for the last few days—but…I dunno. I’m nervous. 
“Jjun…please,” she starts. There’s that nickname. It made my heart sing when she accidentally called me that a couple months ago. It used to slip past her lips so easily when we were together all those years ago, but now she stays so formal. “Lick my nipples, please.” 
Tongue flicking her nipple, her eyes roll back as her body follows. As I kiss further down her body toward her tummy, she reaches for my hair and pulls, making both our breath quicken. She takes the liberty of taking off her own thong and I get rid of my pants. 
We’ve been desperate for this. Desperate to actually feel each other’s bodies. Not clothing-clad bodies, but bare, vulnerable, warm bodies that want each other. And I can’t get enough. I thought I could taste her forever, but now that I’ve gotten my hands on her, on her squishy, chubby body, I’ll never be able to keep my hands off her.
She starts to get impatient, but I’m not finished with her yet. Landing back on top of her, I say, “Lemme just…kiss on ya for a second, okay?”
“Not my—”
“Not your mouth, I know,” I say, placing a gentle kiss on her cheek, trailing down her jaw and sneaking in to nuzzle her neck. Whispering into her ear, I tell her, “I love making you gasp like that.” She chuckles, wrapping her arms around my shoulders, but I grab them and put them over her head to continue kissing her everywhere, tasting each bit of her with the tip of my tongue before pressing my lips to her. Her collarbone, her shoulders, her underarms. Everywhere.
She’s got the cutest mole on her side of her breast I kiss three times before moving on. 
A smile tugs at the corners of her lips when I gently kiss under her breasts. I lick a stripe up her chest between them, making eye contact with her, followed by a harsh bite of one of them. Reaching for her arm, I kiss her palm, then gently suck on the tip of her pointer finger. 
“Remember when you painted that portrait of me?”
“How could I forget?”
“When you put this pinky on my face,” I say, sucking on the tip of it. “I thought I was gonna explode. Feeling you so close to me like that. You looked so pretty that day too. With the sun shining in through the window and the plants around you.” Okay, shut up dork, too many feelings. I squeeze her tits harshly, burying my face in them. “Fuck, you’re so sexy.” 
Rubbing up and down her sides, she scrunches her shoulders, letting out a giggle. I kiss and bite her tummy—I’ve always loved her stomach, but especially so when she wears biker shorts. The way the fabric pulls, creating an outline of her tummy with rays of fabric going toward her hips. It’s one of the sexiest things I’ve ever seen. And to finally see her bare tummy right here in front of me, there’s no way I’m not gonna cover it in kisses. 
“Why are you being all touchy?”
Why wouldn’t I be? Spreading her lips, she looks absolutely delicious. I lick her clit, earning one of the most gorgeous moans I’ve ever heard come out of her mouth. 
“I told you, Sir,” she says. “I want all of you this time.” 
“I know. I’m just tasting you, darling.” I glance up at her. “You thought I was gonna fuck you and not taste you first?” 
Grinding against my mouth, she can hardly take it before she starts begging. “Please, please, please, Yeonjun. I need your cock inside me. Please. I need it so bad.” 
“You’ve never had to beg like this before, hm?”
“Nope,” she says. “People usually do what I ask.” Standing, I leave her briefly for a condom that’s in my toiletries bag in the bathroom. When I come back, she asks, “Prepared, huh?” I nod awkwardly. “Wait, wait,” she stops me from rolling the condom down myself. “Let me see you.” I stand back, letting her look at me in awe before she reaches her hands out, rubbing all over my chest and stomach, kissing my hips, squeezing my balls and licking my nipple, making me gasp. 
Taking a deep breath, I admit, “I want to fuck you so bad, Mira.”
Sitting up on her knees, she reaches for my hand and places it on her breast before leaning into my ear to whisper, “Then fuck me, Sir.” Then, she takes the condom and rolls it down my cock, drawing out the process as long as she possibly can. “Your cock is so fucking beautiful,” she says. “I’m still not over it.”
She lays on her back and spreads her legs while I think of all the things I wanna do to her. I really wanna kiss her, but I can’t. She’s right. We shouldn’t. Resting between her legs, I rub my hands over her body again, taking my time contemplating, even if she protests, claiming I’m teasing her too much. But she teased me, so now I get to tease her. 
Honestly, I can’t believe this is happening. I thought we’d never get past oral in the closet. I line myself up with her entrance, bending to press my lips to her neck and whisper, “Are you sure?” 
“Yeonjun,” she says, placing a hand on my cheek to force me to look at her. “I’m sure. Are you sure?” 
“Absolutely.” 
As I push into her slowly, my whole world comes crumbling down around me. She is perfection. The way she wraps around me like a warm blanket, her eyes full of pleasure sparkling up at mine, the noises she’s making. Nothing else matters anymore but her. 
She breathes out like she’s relieved and says, “I’ve been waiting for this for seven years.” My head reels. Our arms wrap around each other as I find a slow and steady pace. Everything is her. She fits right in my arms as her nails claw at my back and her legs wrap around my waist to make sure I won't go anywhere, which I won’t. But I need to see the way her body moves. 
Sitting up, I stare down at her, pumping in and out, her tits bouncing with every move I make. Finding her clit with my thumb, the noise she makes in response is intoxicating. She arches her back, squeezing her own tit, which is one of the sexiest things I’ve ever seen.
“That’s my girl.” Can I call her that? I don’t care. I’m going to. 
She giggles and scratches my thigh, whispering, “You feel so good. Faster?” And I can’t help but comply, speeding up my thrusts but maintaining control. I don’t know how much longer I can keep this up though. I want…need to go faster and she’s asking me to, but I also want to take things slow, be with her forever. “Faster, please,” she almost sounds like she’s in tears. 
I don’t go much faster, though. This has to be perfect. I can’t be too much. But—
“Hey, stop for a second,” she says genuinely and I oblige, slipping out of her to sit back on my knees. She sits up and reaches for my hands. “Come here,” she says, pulling me closer so our chests are grazing each other’s. “Are you okay?” I nod enthusiastically. “It seems like you’re holding back.” 
“I just…you feel so good and I don’t wanna get carried away. And I don’t know your, like, limits.”
“You can fuck me so hard—no, I want you to fuck me so hard. You don’t have to hold back, okay?” She reaches down and squeezes my cock, waiting for a reaction from me. “I’ve been waiting for this cock and I need you to fuck me and don’t stop until I’m begging you to.” She smiles. “Unless you ever wanna stop, of course.” I nod. “Did you wanna take it slow?”
Without giving my brain time to process, I flip her onto her stomach, yanking her up by her hips so she’s on her knees, ass up. I gather her hair in a makeshift ponytail before thrusting into her so hard it takes her breath away. She feels indescribable—a radiating ache overcomes me and I don’t think I’ll ever be able to let her go after this. 
My thrusts reach a speed finally fast enough for her as she’s whimpering on my cock, shuddering from the feeling of me buried deep inside her. The room fills with the sound of my thighs smacking her ass, making ripples roll down her cheeks. My hand tingles wanting to spank her, but that’s a bit much, no? But she said not to hold back.
I decide to indulge myself, spanking her harshly, my hand making a loud smack, earning an irresistible moan from her. She whispers, “Thank you.”
“Thank you, who?”
“Thank you, Sir,” she whimpers. I spank her again, rubbing it to soothe the sting. I’m fucking her so fast and hard that we’re both sweating, skin getting sticky and slick. Pushing on the small of her back to deepen her arch, I find an even deeper spot inside her. “Ohmygod—” Mira gasps. 
“You sound so sexy,” I groan. I don’t want her to hold back either. I want her to be as loud as she wants to be. No one else is on this floor anyway. Pulling her up by her shoulder, I reach in front of her to rub her clit, her head dropping back and onto my shoulder. 
Slipping out of her, she shudders and whines at the sudden loss but I turn her around so she’s on her back before I land on top of her again, pinning her hands above her head. Her knees fall open and I hook my hands under her thighs before thrusting back into her, earning an incredible eye roll from her. 
“Fuck, Yeonjun.”
“I know, darling,” I say lowly. I wonder if she actually likes it when I call her that. Should I call her something else? Baby? Babe? Love? 
The speed of my thrusts increases again, while I massage her tit. She grips her legs by the back of her knees, holding them wide open for me. “Look at you…being such a good girl for me, hm?” Using my body, I push her legs down gently, letting me in even deeper. Our faces are so close to each other, her lips are just begging to be kissed, but I resist. 
She takes a deep breath, her eyebrows stitch together and she looks up at me before saying with the most genuine sounding voice, “You’re so pretty.”
That makes me absolutely gush. My shoulders scrunch as I run my fingers through my hair before I bend to lick one of her nipples so slowly she can hardly stand it. Kissing up her chest, I whisper, “You’re fucking beautiful, Mira.” Her arms wrap around my neck to pull me closer. 
“Wait, Yeonjun,” she says. I stop in my tracks. “Can you, uh…” she asks, pushing me out of her before getting up off the bed. 
“Is everything okay?” I ask. “Did I hurt you?”
She’s rummaging through her bag and replies, “No, Sir.” Returning, she hands me a small clit vibrator. Oh. “Can you, um…can you use that on me?”
“Whatever you wish, darling,” I say, watching her lay on her back again, spreading her legs open for me. I switch her toy on to the lowest setting. “Do you think about me when you use this to make yourself feel good?” Before she can answer, I place it onto her clit. 
Gasping and nodding, she says, “Yes, Sir.” Her fingers grip the sheets before she admits, “I think about you every time.” She sighs. “Do you think about me when you touch yourself?”
“Of course.”
“What do you think about doing to me?”
“I think about licking all over you. About making you feel good,” I say. “About you screaming my name.”
“You like making me feel good?” 
I nod and we’re both desperate as ever now. Desperate to feel each other. To come together. I thrust back into her, quickly reaching a speed we both like, increasing the intensity of the toy along the way. Her mouth drops open as she furrows her eyebrows, her moans getting higher pitched and quicker. 
“Mira, I wanna see you cum.”
Dropping one of her legs, she wraps it around my waist, grabbing my forearm, clearly close to losing it. “Don’t stop, babe,” she whimpers. I shake my head. “Please, Yeonjun, don’t stop.”
“I’m not gonna stop, darling.”
I reach the deepest part of her, and she finally lets go—eyes rolling back, thighs trembling, clit shuddering under the toy. She’s fucking stunning when she cums. Her other leg falls to the bed while she moans out loud, the corners of her mouth curving upward. “Babe, fuck,” she says breathlessly, “You’re making me cum so hard.”
My thrusts get sloppier and I bury my free hand in her soft waves, groaning and whimpering in her ear as I cum inside her, collapsing on her shoulder. That was truly the best I’ve ever felt. 
Forehead glistening with sweat under the moonlight barely shining through the bedroom window, she looks fucking gorgeous. Her post-sex glow would make anyone swoon. My stomach swirls with emotions. I need her. But I just had her. But I need more. No, I need something else. 
“I wanna kiss you,” she says. Fuck, don’t do this to me. “Please?”
I think about it for a second—I really do. That’s what I want, no, that’s exactly what I need, but— “You told me not to.” 
Shaking her head, she admits, “I don’t care.” She looks absolutely kissable right now. I need to feel her lips on mine again. Passing by each other in the hallway and pretending not to be fucking has been miserable. Every time I see her, I refrain from running up and wrapping my arms around her to give her the best kiss she’s ever had. Not being able to do that has been bad enough, but not even kissing her when I’m literally still inside her? Now that’s torture. 
The way she looks at me too—up through her eyelashes, eyes glistening from pure pleasure, cheeks flushed, lips red and swollen and utterly plump.
She hooks two fingers under my necklace to pull me closer, tilting her chin up toward me. Fuck, don’t do that. My heart races. “Please,” she says. “I need to kiss you.” 
No. Don’t. She’s the one that initiated the no kissing rule. And for good reason. We shouldn’t get involved right now. I let her tug me a few inches closer, but I dodge her lips and turn to my side to lean on the bed before clearing my throat.
“Let’s go take a shower, yeah?” I suggest. 
She sighs and says, “Okay.” Standing up silently, I watch her walk slowly to the bathroom, her body moving so beautifully, but I can tell she’s upset even from behind. I plop down on my back. Did I do the right thing? I want to kiss her more than anything but she’s told me over and over again not to. I didn’t want her to regret something because of the heat of the moment. I don’t want her to feel like I took advantage of her but I also don’t want her to feel like I don’t want her. 
The shower turns on, making me stand up. I catch her looking at herself in the mirror before she glances down. Without speaking, we both get in the huge shower that luckily has two shower heads. She wets her hair then smiles at me sweetly. 
“Can I at least have a hug?” She asks. I chuckle, opening my arms up to her. She wraps her arms around my waist. We wash the day off each other—stressful meetings, long walks to and from the conference center, the amazing sex we just had. The room is mostly silent with the occasional Can you hand me my soap? 
After drying off, we crawl back into the shared bed. I’m sitting up with my back against the headboard while I flick through the TV channels. Half laying down and half resting against the headboard, she keeps awkwardly moving closer to me, opening her mouth and breathing in like she wants to say something but never does.
I slouch a bit to get to her level before opening up my arm up to her and so she can lay her head on my chest. As she snuggles into me, I swear I could die happy right here. The air is calm and sweet and warm, her presence provides an overwhelming sense of comfort and I can’t help but graze my fingers up and down her arm until she falls asleep. 
As predicted, insomnia is my enemy tonight. Questions swirl around my mind. 
Should I have kissed her? What does she want after this? What’s she gonna be like tomorrow morning? How should I act tomorrow morning? After eating some almonds and a banana to try and induce sleep, I go for a walk around the hotel, trying to tire out my body and mind. Eventually, I lay back down thinking about what I really want between the two of us.
Normally, I’d squeeze my eyes shut to picture her lips and eyelashes, but the real Mira is lying right next to me. But I probably shouldn’t stare at her without her permission. With the warmth of thinking of her, there’s also a tug of uncertainty. What if she doesn’t feel the same way I do? What if she just wanted sex? I couldn’t really be mad at her for that, though. That’s what we both wanted at the beginning, even if there may have been some underlying feelings. That’s at least all we were expecting. 
Sighing, I turn away from her, thoughts tangling into each other, emotions pulling on the threads in every direction. I count my breaths, slow and steady, but each breath is full of her scent, making things worse, the adrenaline of unspoken feelings keeping me awake. 
Time stretches out and I look at my phone, the clock glaring back at me—4:37 AM. Another sigh escapes me, heavier this time. My meetings are done for the week, but I don’t like massive changes in my sleep schedule, even when I'm abroad. 
Pulling the covers over my head, I block out the world before quietly whispering her name, like it’s a confession I hope she may hear. I’m answered only by the faintest of snores that have been steady for hours. Finally, my thoughts blur, exhaustion pulling me into a restless sleep. But even in my dreams, she’s there, a shadow at the edge of consciousness.
-
“Hey,” I say groggily to Mira. “What happened to you?” Mira’s already dressed in her work clothes with her hair neatly tied back. The smell of the coffee she’s pouring wafts through the air and warms me up. I start to hug her from behind, but—
“I made coffee,” she replies, her tone professional and clipped. 
“Why’d you get out of bed?”
“To work. That’s why I’m here.” Her voice is detached and she finally turns to look at me. 
Searching her face for the warmth I’d seen last night, I say, “Yeah, but I thought after—”
“We shouldn’t have done that last night.”
“What?”
“Sex,” she says matter-of-factly. “We should not have had sex last night.”
“I know what you meant, but why not?” I ask, my heart pounding. “We’ve been practically having sex for months now.”
“Last night was different.” 
“So?”
Mira takes a deep breath before sitting the coffee pot back on the table. “Because, Yeonjun, I’m your servant and we used to date and now…”
“And now what? We pretend it didn’t happen?” Anger and frustration bubbles inside me. Whether I consciously knew it or not, I’d made my decision last night. I want to be with her for real and I’m willing to do whatever it takes, as long as she’ll have me. I was hoping she felt the same way, but she’s still not willing to admit the depth of our relationship out loud. “Mira, last night was…it was real. You can’t just ignore that.”
She looks away from me, wrapping her arms around herself. “I can’t do this anymore.”
My heart races faster with each step I take toward her. “It’s okay to have feelings.”
“No, it’s not,” she spits, twisting her head back to look at me. “I cannot do this again. We cannot do this again.” I start to interrupt. “I don’t wanna hear it, Yeonjun.”
“Mira, please—”
“I’m sorry,” she says, her voice breaking. “We have to end this before it even starts.” Her words bring a finality to us before she walks out of the kitchenette and onto the balcony. I suppose that’s it then. 
The silence left in her wake is deafening. I slump into a chair, running my hands through my hair, the weight of every unspoken word heavy on my shoulders. The morning light filters through the window, casting long shadows across the room. It’s surreal. 
No. This is not how we end.
Following her out onto the balcony, she stands with her back to me, staring blankly at the lake. The same lake we kayaked on together a few days ago. I envy the serenity of the water. “Mira, you can’t just walk away,” I say softly, hoping to reach her through the wall she’s built around herself. 
She doesn’t turn, but her shoulders tense. “You said it yourself, Yeonjun. I’m nothing. We couldn’t even be together even if we wanted to.” 
“Is that what this is about? You’re still upset about something I said seven years ago?” She shakes her head. “Then what is it?” She keeps turning away from me. And ignoring me. “Talk to me. Please.” 
“There’s nothing left to say.”
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cw. crying, kissing. 
MIRA'S POV
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The rest of our trip to Switzerland was business as usual. I made sure of it. I woke up on time, got his coffee, did everything a servant does and in the manner a servant would do. No smiles. No anger. Just business. 
“What’s been up with you recently?” Hyomin shakes me out of my daydreaming—or daynightmaring, perhaps—replaying that morning with Yeonjun. How hurt he looked. How it felt to break my own heart. How it felt to break his heart. “You haven’t been acting like yourself. What’s going on?”
“Nothing,” I say, glancing over at Yeonjun sitting at the dining table without even realizing it at first. 
Narrowing her eyes, she asks, “Did something happen between you two?”
“No,” I say harshly. 
“You can’t be serious.” I shrug. “You went to Switzerland together for a week and nothing happened? Not even a kiss or a not-so-platonic hug?”
“I have work to do, Hyomin.” Shaking my head, I stomp away in the direction of my room. Slamming my door shut, I press the heels of my hands into my eyes to stop the tears from coming but it's no use. My phone buzzes but I already know who it is. 
Yeonjun 3:52 PM Are you ever gonna talk to me again?
It’s been four days since Switzerland but that’s the twelfth message since we got back. 
Can we talk? Can you meet me in our closet tonight? Just to talk, nothing else. I’d really like to talk to you. Please stop ignoring me. 
I have sent zero. I can’t bring myself to. Tossing my phone on my mattress, there’s a black dress bag and a note on my bed. 
For Saturday. –Y
Are you fucking kidding me? He’s buying me gifts now? What kind of relationship does he think we have? We make each other come a few times, have sex in Switzerland once and now he won’t stop texting me and buying me dresses? Fuck this. 
Me. 4:01 PM Closet. Now.
-
“Hello, darling,” Yeonjun says smugly as I slam the door shut. 
“What the fuck is this, Yeonjun?” I scream-whisper, shoving the dress bag into his chest as his face turns horrified. 
“A dress,” he says defensively, trying to not let the dress bag fall to the floor. 
“Don’t patronize me,” I spit. “You think you can buy me or something?” He shakes his head nervously. “Taking me to Switzerland, staying in a fancy hotel, buying me food, now you’re buying me an expensive dress?”
“I took you to Switzerland as a member of my staff,” he reminds me.
“If you think for one second that I’ll just come running back to you because of this—”
He grabs me by my forearm and gently yanks me close to him to stare down at me hungrily, like he wants to take me right then and there. I know this look very well by this point. 
“You’re cute when you’re mad at me.”
“Shut up.” I throw the dress down and attempt to turn away from him. “Leave me alone, Yeonjun.” His grip tightens, not painfully, but firmly enough to prevent me from going anywhere. 
“Why are you so angry, really? Is it the gifts, or is it because you’re scared of what this means?” I glare at him, feeling the anger bubble up again. 
“Don’t flatter yourself.” I roll my eyes. He sighs, letting go of my arm but not stepping back. 
“I’m not trying to buy you, okay? I just...I like you. And I want to do things for you.”
I cross my arms, trying to maintain the obviousness of my anger but I can’t help I’m shocked. He likes me? Like that? I mean, I was hopeful but I never thought he’d ever say it out loud. Should I say it too? I almost think about it, but instead, I ask, “You think throwing money at me will make me like you more?”
“No,” he says softly, surprising me. “I just don’t know what to do, Mira,” he raises his voice. “You’re ignoring me and I want to show you I care about you.”
“I know you care about me, Yeonjun. I’m telling you to stop caring about me,” I say sternly. “It’s over.”
Over the next few days, he stops texting me, talking to me, I don’t even catch him glancing at me like I usually do several times a day. He must be avoiding me—or doing exactly what I asked him to do, I guess. Which pisses me off too. 
Saturday rolls around and we have yet another fancy dinner to host. The Queen pulled out all the stops for this one too—amazing food, open bar with fancy drinks, great music, even greater decorations. It’s gorgeous. I’d realized I should probably stop being such a bitch and make amends with him. As a gesture, I show up wearing the dress he gave me. 
“Prince Yeonjun?” I ask, watching his ears perk up as he turns around, a clear smile on his face at the sound of my voice. “Can I have a dance, please?” His face relaxes as he nods before he extends his hand to take me to the dancefloor. He performs his customary bow, followed by my curtsy. My tummy tingles a bit at the formality of it all. I feel like a princess. 
As my hand falls into his, nothing matters. Not our history. Not our future. Not his title. Not the lack of mine. I’m with him. We’re together. The soft music from the chamber orchestra is perfect accompaniment for us. 
I’d thought about the idea of us for so long. What we could be, what I want us to be, what I think he wants us to be. I don’t think it’ll ever work, but at least there’s tonight. There’s this dance. 
We sway together, hand in hand, my other hand on his shoulder while his rests around my waist. Eyes locked. His jacket catches the flicker of the chandelier while my gown flows down my waist and onto the floor gracefully. 
Expertly turning me, I can’t help but think back to the first night he broke my heart. Would he do that again? Pressing his hand firmer against my waist, I welcome it by pressing my body more securely against his.  The warmth between us grows stronger by the second. We’re falling in love again. Or maybe we already did. 
He towers over me, much like he did the night of our first kiss. Returning from a night where we’d once again snuck out to see each other, he walked me home. Standing on the front porch of my cottage, we refused to wish each other a good night. The moon was the only light source, but it was enough to see how handsome he was, even back then. 
“Yeonjun…” I whisper as he continues to lead us through a casual dance that lets us focus on a conversation. “I’m sorry.” He looks at me questioningly. “I shouldn’t have gotten upset about the dress. I felt…” I trail off, shaking my head. “I just felt so used, I dunno.” Horror crosses his face. 
“Mira…I didn’t mean—”
“No, I know,” I say. “But I felt like we could never be together, not really anyway.”
“What do you mean?”
I take a deep breath and say, “Keeping secrets, never being able to tell everyone…we should probably stop…you know, what we’ve been doing.” I look up at him through my shaky eyes and he frowns but forces himself to nod. 
“If that’s what you want.”
“I just can’t,” I sniffle. “I can’t do this again. I can’t lose you again.”
“You won’t. I’m right here.” He presses his hands even firmer against my waist to prove it. 
“But where were you seven years ago? I’ve—” My eyes can’t hold my tears any longer, breaking free to run down my cheeks. “I’ve missed you so much.” 
“I know. I’m so sorry.” Brushing the apple of my cheek with his thumb, he lifts my face to meet his eyes. “I’ve missed you too.” Pressing my lips together, I blink a tear out of my eye and I shake my head in protest. “Mira…listen.” He never lets me go. “I am so sorry for what I said that night. If I could take it back, I would.” I smile. “You know that doesn’t matter to me. You mean so much to me,” he says genuinely. “That night in Switzerland meant so much to me.” Everything halts. Our eyes meet. “But if you want me to stop, I will. I’ll never bring us up again.” 
“Us?”
“You know I’m yours whenever you’re ready.” The wind’s knocked out of me. My heart races as he inches closer and closer. So close I can see each individual eyelash. “Tell me to stop.” 
“No,” I say, welcoming his lips on top of mine. His lips meet mine softly, a whisper of a kiss that feels like a promise. It's gentle, tentative at first, like we’re both terrified to lose each other. But then, the years of longing we've kept hidden surge forward, and the kiss deepens.
The room around us fades away, the music, the murmurs of the crowd, the flickering candlelight—they all dissolve into a hazy backdrop. All that exists is us, bound together in this moment of rawness. His hands move from my waist to cradle my face, his touch tender yet insistent. My hands rest against his chest. 
His kiss is everything I've ever dreamed of—sweet yet passionate, comforting yet electrifying. It speaks of forgiveness and second chances. The saltiness of my tears mingle with the softness of his lips.
It's as if we're communicating without words. Each movement, each touch, each breath shared between us is a declaration of our feelings for each other. His arms encircle me, holding me close, and I feel safe, cherished, and utterly adored.
When we finally part, breathless and overwhelmed, our foreheads rest against each other, our eyes closed as we savor the moment. The world starts to come back into focus, but it's different now. Everyone’s eyes are on us. The room has come to a halt. Glancing around the room, there isn’t one person that hasn’t stopped what they’re doing to stare at us. Not us. Me. 
“Fuck,” I whisper. “Excuse me.” I scurry off quickly, leaving him there alone.
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cw. unsupportive parents, classism, crying, love.
YEONJUN'S POV
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Everyone watches as she runs off like it’s a movie. She’s picked up her skirt to avoid tripping, and her head hangs low as she searches for the nearest exit. I awkwardly look around the room, excusing myself with a few head bows.
Running through the castle hallway, I catch up to her right outside my bedroom door. Her forehead’s pressed against the doorframe, arms wrapped around her body while she waits for me. She’s waiting for me. That gives me hope. At least she’s not running from me anymore. 
“Hey, hey, hey,” I whisper, grazing my hand across her shoulder blade. “C’mere.” I pull her into my chest, wrapping one of my arms around her while I open the door with my free hand. I lead her to my bed where she sits awkwardly scrunched into a ball while I rush to flick on some lamps. Then, I sit next to her, my hand resting on her shoulder blade for comfort. 
“I can’t—” she can hardly speak through her tears. 
“It’s okay.”
“I can’t do this, Jjun, I can’t.” She’s shaking her head, tears running down her cheeks. “I really want to but I just…” She trails off. Before I can speak up, she adds, “Your mother—” 
My heart sinks. “My mother? Did she do something to you?” Pressing her lips together, she nods. “Take some deep breaths, love, and tell me what she did.” She does as I say, breathing in through her nose and out through her mouth, attempting to compose herself. 
“After,” she starts hiccuping and I encourage her to take more deep breaths by modeling the breathing technique she was using earlier. “After that night in Switzerland,” she begins, but it’s too difficult for her to speak. Pulling out her phone, she silently thumbs through her phone to her voice mail box. My mother’s voice, cold and stern, plays from the speaker. 
Mira Ashenrose, the audacious servant who dares aspire beyond her station, it has come to my attention that your eyes linger far too long on my son. Your actions are not only bold but also insolent, as you seem to have forgotten your place within my castle walls.
Let me be clear: the Prince's future is one of sovereignty and grandeur, a path predetermined by bloodline and duty. Any attempts to disrupt or divert his focus with your insignificant presence will be met with severe consequences.
You are a servant, a role you should embrace with humility and gratitude. Your duties do not include entertaining fantasies of a life beyond your given position, especially one involving a royal whom you are unworthy to even address directly.
Cease your imprudent behavior immediately. Should I find even the slightest hint of your infatuation resurfacing, you will discover that my patience is not to be tested. Your continued employment—and indeed, your very well-being—hangs by a thread of my tolerance, a thread that I am fully prepared to cut.
Do not mistake this warning for mere words. You will find that I am a queen of action. Refrain from crossing boundaries that were never meant for you, and remember your place. It is only in your compliance that you will find any semblance of mercy from me.
Consider this your only warning.
By this point, her crying has subsided to sniffles but I’m speechless. How could she have done this? “I woke up that night after we…were together. You were still next to me. I was just checking the time and I had that message waiting for me.” 
“Mira, I don’t care what my mother thinks.”
“I care,” she says. “I can’t be with someone whose mother thinks of me like this,” she says, gesturing to her phone. “And you used to think of me that way. What if you start thinking like that again? Or do you already think of me this way?”
“Of course not,” I say, grabbing her hands. “Look at me.” She puts on a brave face before looking me straight in the eye. “Do you wanna know what I think of you?” She hums. “Perfect. Beautiful. Kind. Caring. Talented.” Smiling to herself, she looks down at our hands. “That’s what I think of you.” She nods gently and I brush some hair back. “You should have told me.” She shakes her head. 
“I decided to quit anyway,” she sniffles. “I already put in my two weeks. That’s why I asked you to dance. I wasn’t gonna leave without dancing with you at least once.” She glances down at my lips. “Or kissing you at least once,” she giggles. 
“Or twice?”
She chuckles again, glancing down at the floor, wiping her cheek with the back of her hand. “Sure.” I peck her lips gently. 
“Three times?” I ask, barely backing away from her. 
“How about you kiss me over and over until I tell you to stop?”
I don’t waste any more time playing silly games with her. I crash my lips into hers and we melt together, she groans against my lips and I deepen the kiss, my hand against her cheek. But she soon breaks it to ask, “Can I ask you something?”
“Anything.”
“Why didn’t you kiss me? You know, when I asked you to.”
“Because I thought if I did, you’d do exactly what you did the next morning,” I say. “I didn't wanna lose you.” 
Nodding, she runs her thumb across my knuckles. “What are we gonna do?” She asks. 
“About what?”
“Us.”
“There’s an us?”
“Ah, shut up,” she laughs, nudging my shoulder. “You know I’m yours whenever you’re ready.”
-
“Yeonjun, what is it? I’m very busy,” Mother says, not bothering to look up from the many papers that are shuffled across her desk. 
“Mother, we need to talk,” I say, my voice steady but firm.
Sliding her glasses off her nose, she drops them on the desk and turns in her chair to make eye contact. “You’re right,” she says and I look confused. “What are these policy proposals you wrote?” Why is she reading those? How did she even find them? “This Freshwater Sustainability Proposal,” she says matter-of-factly. 
“What’s wr—”
“This is some of your worst writing. Half of it doesn’t even make sense,” she says, my stomach dropping. Those were drafts. “I mean, what is this part about ‘aquatic ecosystem revitalization through bioremediation techniques’? You think the council will understand that jargon? And this section on ‘community-based water stewardship programs’? It’s laughably naive. Who’s going to manage these programs? Volunteers?”
“That is a well-researched proposal meant to—”
“Well-researched?” She scoffs, flipping through the pages with a dismissive hand. “It’s idealistic drivel, Yeonjun. We need practical solutions, not fanciful ideas that belong in a classroom.”
“These ideas could make a real difference.”
She waves a hand, brushing off my words. “Idealism is pointless. We can’t gamble on untested theories.”
“Untested theories?” I can’t help but let a note of disbelief slip into my voice. “They’re proven methods many other countries have successfully implemented.”
“Our priority is status and stability.”
“What good is status and stability if our environment collapses?” I challenge.
She glares at me, her eyes cold before she lets out an evil chuckle. “Sometimes I forget how young you are.”
“Is that why you feel the need to control every aspect of my life?” 
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
I take a deep breath, preparing for the moment of truth. “When did you find out about Mira?”
The question hangs in the air, catching her completely off guard. Her eyes widen ever so slightly, but she quickly masks her surprise. “Who? Oh, that servant that quit last week? I did see you two kiss at the party.”
“Don’t play games with me, Mother,” I say, my voice hard. “I know you knew about us before that. That voicemail you left her? Where you threatened her, told her she was nothing but a servant, and to stay away from me.”
She recovers quickly, her expression turning cold. “How dare you accuse me of such a thing?”
“How dare you do such a thing?” I shoot back. “Mira is someone I care about and you had no right to interfere with our relationship,” I say.
“Relationship?” She rolls her eyes. “Your relationship is a shallow, pleasant distraction at best. She’s simply a way to blow off steam, to indulge in sexual frustrations.”
Ew. But okay. “It’s more than that, Mother. Mira means something to me.”
She sighs, a mix of impatience and disappointment in her voice. “Yeonjun, you’re too young to understand the complexities involved here. You have a duty to this kingdom, to your people. Mira is not part of that equation.”
“If you can’t find a way to accept the woman I love, then…I don’t know if there’s anything else for us to say to each other.”
“You’ve known her for three months, Yeonjun. You’re not in love.”
I shake my head. “We’ve known each other for seven years.”
“What?” She asks, shocked. “You’ve been seeing her behind my back for seven years?”
“No,” I say. “We used to date a while ago and then we…I dunno, started back up after she started working here.” 
“You think you love her,” she counters sharply. “But what you feel is temporary. It’s not sustainable. And you’re all for sustainability, right?” I roll my eyes. “I will not allow you to jeopardize your future and duty for a fleeting infatuation,” I say. “Your choices affect everyone,” she says, her tone unyielding. “Including the stability of this kingdom.”
“You’re trying to control me,” I accuse, feeling the weight of her authority pressing down on me.
“I’m trying to protect you. You must think beyond your own desires.”
Eventually, I say, “Mother, mind your business.” I storm off, headed in the direction of the garden to get some air. I don’t stop walking until I find myself sitting under the willow tree that Mira and I love so much. She’s always loved it here. 
Maybe Mira’s right—I don't know if it's such a great idea to be with someone whose mother thinks of them like mine does about her. Fuck, this is so unfair. Regardless, Mother’s getting what she wants. Us not together. 
Quiet footsteps approach me. Not now, please. I can’t argue with Mother anymore. 
“The woman you love, huh?”
“Mira,” I say, happiness evident in my voice. “Hi.” She smiles, holding her hands behind her back before she walks closer to me. “Um…” She sticks her hand out for me to grab and helps me to my feet. 
“I wasn’t eavesdropping, I swear,” she says but I wouldn’t care if she were to be honest. “I was getting some water from the kitchen and overheard.” 
“Mira…” I say, an undeniable smile spreading across my face, my hands running down her arms, wrapping around her waist to bring her closer. “I’m so happy to see you.”
“Why’s that?” She asks with a sweet smile. 
“I’m always happy to see you,” I say. “I’m sorry you had to hear what she said about you.” She shakes her head. “I do by the way,” I say. “I love you.”
“Fucking finally,” she whispers before reaching her arms around my neck to pull me closer to her, crashing her lips into mine. They move over each other passionately. She tastes so fucking delicious. She feels so fucking warm. She smells so fucking good. “Oh, I love you too,” she giggles, breaking the kiss. “Sorry, I should’ve said it sooner.”
“I love you too too,” I say between kisses. “So much. You have no idea.” She looks so sweet. “I guess we should probably talk about—”
Shaking her head, she says, “Not yet. Let’s just—” She gives me another deep kiss. “We can think about that later, okay?” I nod and press my lips to hers again. 
Everything is so perfect. The way her laugh echoes in my ear like nothing could ever go wrong, the way her body slowly but sensually grinds against my own, the way we know we love each other and can finally say it out loud, even if we don’t know what the future holds for us. 
Breaking the kiss gently, she’s absolutely stunning. I don’t think I’ve ever seen anything as gorgeous as her. I brush my thumb across her eyebrow and say matter-of-factly, “You’re so beautiful.”
“Thank you,” she replies. “So are you.”
The air shifts. We’re alone and we’re hyper aware of that fact. I doubt anyone could even hear us. Our eyelids get heavy as we lean into each other, our lips touching in a fiery kiss that leaves me needing more. Holding her cheek in my hand, it grows deeper and hotter until a tiny moan leaves her mouth. “Fuck,” she says under her breath. “You’re such a good kisser.”
“That’s all you, baby,” I say, sliding my hand down to squeeze her amazing ass. 
“Yeonjun,” she whines. “You can’t tell me you love me and then not immediately fuck me.” 
“I can’t even imagine doing such a thing,” I chuckle.
“You think…” she glances behind her. “Think we can sneak into your room together?”
“Absolutely.”
Walking back to the castle makes us all the more giddy. Hands touching each other playfully, giggling and flirting in hushed tones all the way back to my room where I lead her to my bed. 
Landing on top of her, she’s so pretty. Covering every inch of her bare skin with kisses, I can’t stop whispering compliments to her. Real compliments I’ve always wanted to say. 
You’re the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen. I’m so lucky I get to love you. I love every inch of you and I’m gonna show how much I mean it. 
“Please, Jjun, I need you.”
“You know I need to taste you first, though, right?”
“Of course.” She lets me slip her sweatpants off her legs, the cool air making goosebumps prick her skin. Her maroon thong is so sexy. Desperately moving her thong to the side, I take a deep breath, wanting to take my time with her. Letting go of her thong, it snaps back into place, covering her back up. I press my lips to her tummy, peppering her with soft and slow kisses. 
“So perfect,” I whisper against her skin. And I mean it. Every time I say it. “I could worship your body for hours.” 
“We’ve got time, my love.” 
All I know is by the time I’m done covering her body in kisses, the sun has completely set and she’s illuminated only by the lamp on my bedside table. But I can absolutely still see how beautiful she is. I could see her beauty in the pitch black. 
“Yeonjun,” she starts, pulling me up to look her in the eyes. She brushes some of my hair back and says, “Whatever happens after this, I want you to know—” I start to protest. What does she mean? I know what’s gonna happen after this. We’re gonna find a way to be together. “I want you to know that I love you, okay?”
“Mira…I love you too.”
“Just know that…” she takes a deep breath. “I’m yours.”
I give her a long, lingering kiss and say, “And I’m yours.”  
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