#and there's no shame in alcoholism

[diezmil10000]

el alcohol quita la vergüenza

[sibmakesart]

i dont do the walk of shame i ✨strut✨

Strut, by Emeline

[kinokoshoujoart]

Marrying Carter in Harvest Moon DS Cute! (North American version)

oh… sorry no not the archaeologist, i mean Pastor Carter from Mineral Town!

(or is it Pastor Curdy….?)

teeechnically his descendant, and it causes a game over… but this is the only time we’ve been able to marry him right?

so in the girl version of HMDS, there’s two “secret” Mineral Town bachelors that you can marry by talking to them enough times on the phone. one is Mason, the guy who runs May’s Tailoring… but the second, Pastor Carter, is a bit more obscure…

i couldn’t find them uploaded anywhere so here are his 2nd* thru 10th conversations+his proposal+proposal rejection in english! if you want to see it on youtube instead here you go

*i failed to record the first conversation when it happened, and there’s no way in hell i’m resetting my whole game again (…yet), so…just know the first one was like “oh you want to talk? what should we talk about…….. …… ….. …. i can’t think of anything. well see ya………” extremely riveting stuff

he’s so obscure that i didn’t even realize that he was a bachelor until i found out about the mechanic from this japanese wiki!! (here’s an archive link to the page on him in case the page doesn’t work) all i did was test whether it worked in english since i couldn’t find any english info at all mentioning it. i’m sure others have found him… right……..

in case the links above don’t work, a small guide to holy matrimony below the cut since i can’t find one in english

it works essentially the same as the Mason marriage (so it’s just a game over, sadly…), and the steps are pretty tedious and counterintuitive, so you’re unlikely to just stumble across it… but you too can get a priest to break his vow of celibacy for you or whatever!

you will need:

at least 2,050,000 G

20 cursed tools/accessories

if you really don’t want to dig up 20 cursed things you can substitute 100x “remove a cursed tool/accessory” for blessing a cursed tool…

but, including all the cursed tools and accessories, there’s only 16… which means you will need to go dig up 4 duplicate cursed accessories using this method! yay!!! extremely pointless since you can’t sell blessed accessories until after marriage in DS for girl (at which point you can’t trigger pastor carter’s proposal)

you unlock a conversation with cardi when you spend at least 205,000 G. which means the quickest thing to do is to order removal of a cursed item five times, then bless 2 cursed items.

**be careful when blessing accessories to only equip one at a time!!! if you equip a stack of duplicate accessories, blessing that stack destroys the duplicates!!!! :( so just take 1 out of the stack and equip it!!!**

you also can’t unlock more conversations until you’ve seen the one you unlocked, so like even if you spend a million G you’ll just unlock one conversation, and you’ll need to finish that conversation and then spend 205,000 G to unlock the next one…yeah….

on the tenth conversation he abruptly reveals that he’s fallen in love with you and asks you to marry him! it ends your game, but….! on the bright side, it ends your game!!! you’re finally free from Hell Simulator!!!!

[tactax-art]

Ghost baited Soap into a drinking contest and lost so bad he can't walk, now Soap is carrying him back to base while having the leftovers ♥️

[whosname]

Here I am again.

[aftgficrec]

ack finally caught you guys open <333 thanks for all your work! I was wondering if you have any newer longer fics with realistic characterisation and writing (similar to profenity’s works maybe?) and also any non-fox Neil/andrew fics? Thank you!And sorry for the tall order;;🙏

You’ll find an abundance of non-fox andreil in our recent Staff Recs: Writers post. On our tags page under AUs, explore the shops and jobs sections or other themes from fantasy to band aus.

Fandom writer profenity is known for long, meaty explorations of canon characters and themes. Their ongoing WIP ‘The Unkindness of Ravens’ has more than 380k words and 12k+ kudos! Find it in this Raven!Neil to Fox ask under former writing name crazy_like_a. The author interacts with fans on tumblr @hopingforcoordinates. 

We’ve featured or referred to profenity’s ‘Lessons in Cartography’ and sequel ‘The Cartographer and the World’ in many asks. I’m listing some as a doorway to similar works. For something newer, try the Kevin-centric ‘A Falling Star’ series, featured here. If this answer seems cobbled together — it is. This is my subjective, limited attempt at catching lightning in a bottle. -A

check out other works in these asks that feature profenity’s ‘Lessons’ series:

must read fandom classics here

post canon continuation of The King’s Men here

Neil fights with Jack here

andreil exploring feelings, intimacy and sexuality here

in character andreil smut here

small selection of ‘not new’ recs:

‘Hold me close, in fact bury me’ and ‘Trust Fall (And Welcoming Arms)’ here

‘Black As Is The Raven, He’ll Get A Partner’ here

‘progress comes in small steps’ series here

‘Inked Truths’ series here

‘Baltimore Blues’ here

long recs for a return to fandom here

A Falling Star series by NikNak22 [Rated M/E, 245011 words, 3 complete works, Updated Nov 2023]

NB: the author credits inspiration to ‘To Be Certain We'll Be Tall Again’ by fullyvisible, featured here, now complete.

Part 1: Dead of Night (E, 101589 words) It’s Kevin’s senior year at PSU, and things are…okay. But that changes when a single question from a nosy reporter sends his life spiraling. The descent is slow and maddening – memories and trauma from his past weave together to form the image of the man that stands there today. As Kevin begins to look around him with a new and critical eye, though, he’s no longer sure that man is who he wants to be. So the question is - when faced with the truth, is it a case of Kevin finally getting what he deserves? Or is it about time to prove a lot of people (including himself) wrong? Aka the fic that’s all about Kevin Day.

tw: torture, tw: abuse, tw: child abuse, tw: rape/noncon, tw: alcohol abuse, tw: psychological abuse, tw: depression, tw: self esteem issues, tw: body dysmorphia, tw: body shaming, tw: bullying, tw: assault, tw: homophobia, tw: racism,  tw: self harm

Part 2: Darkest Before Dawn (M, 52365) “This is finally it, isn’t it?” Jeremy whispers. “Oui,” Jean says softly on Kevin’s other side. “I believe it is.” And for a moment, they look so lost. Just two little boys about to go out and face the big, wide world. So Kevin searches until both of his hands find one of theirs. He doesn’t look at them, though he feels their gazes on him. He just breathes deeply and closes his eyes. Then he squeezes their hands as he tells them, “I can’t wait to see what you’ll do next.” AKA the highs and lows of Kevin’s life after graduation and into the Pros.

tw: self esteem issues, tw: panic attacks, tw: minor character death, tw: implied/referenced assault, tw: implied/referenced eating disorders

Part 3: In the Light of Day (E, 91057) It’s been almost five years since Kevin graduated from PSU. Five years that he's played Exy professionally. Five years since he’s learned to live on his own. Five years after discovering he’s in love with his best friends, former USC Trojans Jeremy Knox and Jean Moreau. Five years since he’s figured out, they will never love him back. So, when Jeremy and Jean invite him to their house for Christmas this year, he knows this is it. It’s the finale. The last hurrah. The swan song. The final act. It’s time he lets them go, lets this foolish, one-sided love go, once and for all. But he might find this is harder than he ever expected.

tw: depression, tw: bullying, tw: self esteem issues, tw: body dysmorphia, tw: imposter syndrome, tw: implied/referenced eating disorders, tw: gaslighting, tw: ptsd, tw: dissociation, tw: implied/referenced abuse

[valyrfia]

i bought myself some rlly nice alcohol to celebrate me fixing a bug in my code today only to get home and decide i actually just want to drink some apple and ginger juice and eat a little tiramisu instead because i want to get up and get to the gym and do some chores in the morning before quali. adulthood comes for us all.

[cerise-on-top]

Fasching with König

Because today is Faschingsdienstag, I just had to write something for him on that day! Today is the only day I can post this, afterwards I'll have to wait over a year again! Fasching is an Austrian holiday that is essentially the last day before fasting for 40 days, so people go all out with food and drinks and festivities, they even dress up in costumes! It's not nearly as fancy as what some other countries have, but it's tradition! Besides, who am I to say no to a Krapfen with König!

Mentions of alcohol, but König is Austrian, so what did you expect?

First off, he hates going to the city during that “holiday”, there are far too many people, the crowds are way too big and it’s too loud for his liking as well. The only reason he’s taking you to the city on that day is so you can experience more of Austria with him. At least that’s what he tells you, in reality he just really wants to go eat a Langos or two and drink a few beers. No one would judge him for that on Fasching, there are crazier bastards out there than him. He’s never been a fan of Fasching, not even when he was a kid. The only reason he looked forward to that day was because he could go home from school earlier than usual. But other than that Fasching had always irritated him. He was never one for playing dress up either.

He couldn’t say he was surprised when you came up to him, demanding for the two of you to dress up as something. The most König would do on his own would be to put on a pair of bee feelers on top of his head, but he would never consider putting on a full costume. Not only was there a chance people would stare at him, but he’d feel awkward as well. Besides, which place would actually sell a costume in his size? Not a common one. You’d need to be a bit annoying for him to put on more than just bee feelers. He’s more willing to play dress up with you as long as you put on something as well, though, even if it still wouldn’t be anything too fancy. If he can find one, he might put on a Winnie the Pooh onesie, but only because it’s somewhat comfortable, somewhat warm and because there are weirder people than him out there.

He’d hate seeing the Faschingsumzug, but he’d tolerate it just for you so you can see all the wagons together and comment on all the costumes. The music is far too loud, there are people surrounding him on every side and he still hasn’t had a single drink yet. Tragic. You might wanna hold onto his arm before you’re being swept away by the crowds. Although König usually isn't one for PDA, in this case he’d prefer to keep you close. It keeps him a bit calmer and you’re not getting lost in a city or town you barely know. You can drag him around all you want, though, he’ll comply, even if he might roll his eyes a bit whenever you wanna go take a closer look at some of the other costumes and wagons. However, get ready to be dragged to one of the nearest stands for a few Langos. They’re not amazing, nothing special in the slightest, but they’re not bad either. He’ll pay for them, naturally. You can choose between a regular Langos, a Toast Langos or even a Käsekrainer Langos. König will likely have eaten all three due to his massive appetite, but you’re more than welcome to take a bite out of them as well.

Once it’s finally getting a bit later and the masses are starting to disperse, that’s when König will be a bit less grumpy. He gets to finally go to a bar with you and drink to his heart's content, his highlight of the day. You can drink whatever you want, from soda to Pago, from Spritzer to Jägermeister, he’ll always go for a few beers. While he might seem a bit grumpy at first, once he’s had his first beer he’s a bit more cheerful, König just really hates big crowds. However, he got to spend another day with you, which is all he could ever want. While you’re sitting at the bar he might take out a few Krapfen for the both of you to enjoy as well. Might joke about getting some Heringsschmaus with you the next day, even if you don’t like fish. It’s tradition, it’s part of the Faschingszeit, but that doesn’t mean he’s a big fan of it either. No, he much prefers the Krapfen you can eat during Fasching. Not big on fasting, he loves beer and meat too much to give up either of those things and won’t even do so if you ask him to. He’s a simple man, he knows what he wants and he knows what he likes. You can pry his Schweinsbraten from his cold dead hands, and even then he’d put up a fight.

Although König loves spending time with you, he will be glad once Fasching is over and once you finally voice the thought of going home. He’s tired from all the people and the alcohol makes this situation only slightly better. Even so, despite all of that, he’s looking forward to the next holiday, proper or not, he can spend with you. Due to him having drunk some beers, he’ll likely stay in bed a bit longer the next day. A perfect opportunity to snuggle up to him for a bit. Afterwards you can discuss what you would like to eat together.

[annabelle--cane]

you! person who talks about how "everyone has an addiction" and mainly means phones/video games! quick quick, tell me how you feel about people who compulsively use drugs!

[just-antithings]

i have no idea where to send dni halls of shame but my best friend found this in the wild and i shit you not, this person is 100% serious about all of these

every single one.

[whumpshaped]

anon asked:

your recent ghost whumper drabble was AMAZING that is such a cool concept! can we get a part two? maybe whumpee is in a scenario where they’re about to die or get murdered by someone and whumper saves them? maybe comfort afterwards? :D

---

prev

uhhh idk abt comfort but... here !

tw alcohol, drugs, addiction whump, paranormal, death, murder, possession, some pretty bad derogatory language, ableist language, addiction shaming, emeto, knives, threat of death

Whumpee was stumbling around in the city by themself — almost by themself, never truly by themself, — when that weirdo spotted them. He sauntered up to them and asked for a cigarette, and Whumper told them not to give him any. They were feeling rebellious that night. They tried to reach into their pocket, only to be stopped by and get growled at by the ghost sharing their body.

It just spurred them on, in all honesty. They didn’t even like how the stranger approached them, didn’t even like the way he looked at them, but what they disliked even more was being constantly bossed around by someone who didn’t even have a body of his own.

“Would you fucking stop?” they snapped, trying to get their hand free from Whumper’s invisible grasp. The stranger gave them a weird look.

“What?” he asked with a stupid little chuckle. He was clearly trying to laugh it off and act casual, but Whumpee didn’t need that, they didn’t need to be reassured that they were normal. They weren’t, and they also weren’t even talking to him.

I told you not to give him anything. Are you going to argue with me in the middle of the street?

“I’ll give everyone what I damn well please!” they went on. The stranger threw his hands up.

“Whoa, yeah, of course. If you didn’t want to give–”

“Shut the fuck up!” 

He thinks you’re crazy.

“I don’t care!” Whumpee couldn’t stop screaming at the stupid thing. He was being so insufferable, so controlling, so power-hungry– It was impossible to bear. Plus, it wasn’t like they hadn’t gotten used to the disgusted and confused looks from others whenever they walked around in the city like a zombie, drunk, high, dead-eyed, and possessed. They didn’t care what this random man thought.

“Okay, chill out!” the guy finally yelled back. “What the fuck? What kind of fucking crazy junkie are you? Keep your dumb ass cigs, I don’t want whatever’s in them!”

Now he got Whumpee’s attention. “Oh, you’re this easily deterred? You don’t want free cigs off a crazy, possessed junkie? Fucking coward.”

Whumpee was way too full of alcohol to react adequately when the guy raised his arm. They were punched hard, almost knocking them off balance. The stranger pushed them against the wall of the nearest building by the collar of their shirt, his other hand quickly producing a knife from his pocket. “I thought I might have some fun with you once I got that fucking cigarette, but now that I’m looking at you a bit closer, I wouldn’t touch your dirty, disease-riddled ass with a bargepole. But I might put something else in you if you don’t shut the fuck up.” 

All this over a cigarette?

Whumpee’s breath hitched when the blade of the knife was pushed against their throat. The danger was finally grave enough that they decided they should focus on that instead of the voice in their head, but… Maybe they should push more. Maybe they should let this man kill them, just to spite Whumper. 

It all happened so quickly. Whumpee made a split second decision to spit in the stranger’s face, he began to scream at them, they felt a sharp pain in their neck– then everything went black. It felt like they were cradled so close to someone’s chest that there was no light reaching them. Like the arms enveloping them were blocking out the rest of the world, all sight and sound, all sensation apart from being held tight. 

They nestled into the hug despite how cold it felt. They were scared. Wherever they were, however freezing and pitch black it was, they didn’t feel the pounding headache and they weren’t being shouted at. They weren’t nauseous, they weren’t bleeding from the throat, they weren’t in constant danger. It was quiet, they were held, and they could finally admit to themself that they were terrified.

When their consciousness was returned to their body, it felt like it was done bit by bit, almost dribbling back into their nerves and muscles like a thick syrup. The aches came back first; their head, their neck, their back, their arms and legs… Then came the light, the sounds, the sensation of the rain beating down on them. It hadn’t been raining when they last saw the outside world. Their socks were soaked inside their shoes, their shirt stuck to their body, their arms… their arms were covered in something that didn’t look like water.

It looked like blood. Blood and dirt. 

When their eyes focused a little better, and they were able to look past the palms of their hands, they saw disturbed soil with pieces of fabric sticking out from under it. It looked like someone was under there, under a thin layer of dirt that barely did anything to cover them. It looked like someone had hastily dug a shallow grave with nothing but their bare hands. 

Whumpee turned their hands over. There was dirt stuck beneath their nails, and plenty of small scratches from whatever their skin must’ve caught on as they were digging.

Let’s go home.

They turned to the side and retched, so forcefully that their nose started bleeding. They spotted the stranger’s knife not far from where they were kneeling on the ground, the blade covered in a layer of blood thick enough to survive the rain. “What did you do?” they rasped. “What did you make me do?”

You got yourself into some trouble. I got you out of it.

“You killed him. You killed him. I killed him.”

Did I not tell you not to give him a cigarette?

Whumpee’s vision was swimming. They didn’t think they would be able to stand up on their own and go home. They had to go to the police. Maybe they could plead insanity.

You’ll feel better after a hot shower.

They stood up against their will, supported by forces beyond the mortal plane. They began walking in the direction of their apartment, no matter how much they tried to change course and go anywhere else. Anywhere with other people. Someone who could see them and call emergency services.

I’ll take care of you.

[anonymouspuzzler]

oh baby it's Foofy Fiday (note: i have absolutely no idea what day this will queue up.) more thanks to @incorrectbugsnaxquotes for many of these prompts as well!

(alt text/image IDs below the cut!)

[Image 1 ID: Doodle page with various drawings of Floofty, including: - A three-panel comic with first, Floofty handing a wax-sealed envelope to Shelda. Second panel is Shelda, looking confused, opening the letter, and third, a POV of the letter reading simply, "bitch. Respectfully, -- Floofty F. Fizzlebean". - A very simplified drawing of Floofty smirking and sitting on the ground, legs out, with an arrow pointing to them reading "la creatura". - A sketch of a silhouetted Floofty, goggles glowing, walking along the beach with their pegleg and a severed leg clearly in one hand. - Floofty gesturing to a closed chemical cabinet with a sign reading "GENDER. CAUTION! HIGHLY TOXIC" - A meme recreation of Floofty holding up a flask with text reading "FINALLY. GENDER FLUID" - Floofty, grimacing and gesturing with one hand, saying, "I've come to make an announcement. Snorpington's a punk-*ss b*tch," - The X-Files "I WANT TO BELIEVE" poster, but the UFO has been replaced with a drawing of a T-posing Floofty floating at a slight angle into the sky.]

[Image 2 ID: A 4-panel comic of Filbo and Floofty. In the first panel, Floofty is sitting at a bar sipping from a cup, looking annoyed as a dancing Filbo backs into them with a smile. Filbo says, "Hey! Can I have a sip of your water?" and Floofty replies, "It isn't water." In the second panel, Filbo has turned around to wink and do finger guns at Floofty, saying, "Snax juice!! I like your style!" Floofty, glaring, responds, "It's vinegar." In the third panel, Filbo, still frozen in finger-guns position, looks on in horror and Floofty, still glaring, takes a slow sip from the cup. In the fourth panel, Filbo, horrified, says "...what?" and Floofty replies simply, "It's vinegar, plebian."]

[Image 3 ID: A 3-panel comic of Triffany and Floofty. In the first, Triffany, grinning and holding a stack of papers with one arm, extends the other to Floofty while saying, "Good job, Floofty!" Floofty, taking the item with one hand, says, "You're giving me a sticker?" In the second panel, Triffany, still grinning and gesturing with one pointer finger, says, "Not just a sticker! It has a kitten saying 'Me-WOW!'" Floofty, staring down at the sticker looking nonplussed, replies, "I'm not a kindergartener." In the third, Triffany, looking disappointed, leans down and reaches out saying, "Okay, I'll take it back." Floofty, glaring and holding the sticker in both hands, whirls away while saying, "I earned this, back off."]

[Image 4 ID: A two-panel comic of Floofty and Shelda. Shelda, sitting on a log, eyes closed and hands clutched over her heart, says, "I never considered you an enemy." Floofty, sitting on a separate log with a book in one hand and leaning their head on the other, doesn't even look up as they respond "I never considered you at all." In the second panel, Floofty continues reading and not acknowledging Shelda, who has placed both hands on her knees and says in disbelief, "Now that's just hurtful".]

[Image 5 ID: A drawing of Floofty recreating a scene from It's Always Sunny. They are grinning wildly, one hand pumping a fist and the other holding a whiteboard marker, moving so quickly they're motion-blurred. Behind them a whiteboard reads in all caps "MURDER".]

[5tupidusrnam3]

Textless versions of the teaser image and the cover image for chapter 1 for awss!!!!

@pagescomics is where you can read it by the way 😸

[james-is-nasqueer]

anyone else seeing some distasteful kurt busch dwi takes or is it just me

[silvantransthranduiltrash]

Thranduil Can’t Get Drunk

No seriously, neither Thranduil, nor those of his line (oropher, legolas, etc) can get drunk. At least not off of the liquor commonly served.

The only way they can get more than slightly tipsy is with a highly specialized alcohol that they invented that takes 10 years to make.

It’s a result of how much they drink.

The thing is, they’re happy and functional drunks, so unlike others, who start behaving badly or incoherently after to many drinks, they don’t feel the need to stop drinking just because of a personality shift, so they drink almost all the time.

At this point legolas can drink non-stop while on guard duty and still be able to perform just as well as when he was sober.

So yeah, Thranduil might act drunk after too many drinks, but he isn’t at all and only does it to get away from people he doesn’t like.

Legolas has a habit of challenging anyone outside of his realm to a drinking competition bc they either don’t know (Elladan and elrohir) or don’t believe that he physically cannot get drunk unless it’s his own special brew (glorfindel).

They always regret it.

The fellowship: *at the wedding reception to Arwen and Aragorn*

The fellowship, minus Aragorn bc he knows better, plus faramir, eomir and eowyn: *enters drinking competition*

Arwen: *taking bets bc she absolutely will take advantage of the situation to make extra money*

The twins: *egging on the competition bc they remember their own bet that they lost and now want everyone else to suffer*

Aragorn: *tired dad sigh*

Gandalf: *inside cackles*

The results:

The hobbits: *merry is out for the count, with pippin giggling up a storm unable to stand straight, sam is giving a lecture on gardening, and Frodo is cackling insanely*

Gimli: *slurring words* -and that’s how my father helped win the battle-

Faramir: *hyperactive squirrel for 30 minutes before immediately crashing where he stands*

Eowyn: *challenging everyone to a fight*

Eomir: *thinks he can beat legolas now since he’s witnessed this competition before after helms deep* *is wrong*

Legolas: *on his third barrel with no difference between now and when he was sober, being cheered on by a crowd*

Arwen: *cackling like a money grubbing gremlin on crack*

Aragorn: *tired dad sign 2.0*

Elrond: *so happy that at least his children were smart enough not to challeng legolas in a drinking competition this time*

[furbearingbrick]

[image id: two images.

first image: a screenshot which reads "I need to defend beer from the 'beer tastes like piss' (has only ever drank a discount room temperature can beer) website forever"

second image: the meme of Lord Farquaad pointing, with text that reads: "TAS2R38 'non-taster' variant!"

Joke explanation: The TAS2R38 gene determines taste sensitivity, and a rare mutation, also known as the "non-taster" variant, prevents those affected from fully perceiving bitter flavors.

end id.]