#bsd first gen

[crimson0lake]

Warnings: swears, mentions of killing, spoilers of bsd: One Time Sanity

Chuuya literally looking for who the k!ller is to get them to Mori, and probably to their brutal end

The k!llers in question:

Haruto: why the f^ck you broke the coffee machine?

Andres: did you know that there's a mushroom that turns ants to zombies?

Haruto: that's not the answer to my question

Andres: what question?

[araived]

Welcome to my newest obsession: team swap!! This is now a Thing I Am Into. I will be developing backstories, but just wanted to get this out.

Yes, I know BSD does not have a gen 1 trio. I am very sad about it but shhh please ignore.

[rosalinesurvived]

A Hc that i’ve had for a long while is that Fukuzawa was at least semi non-verbal as a kid because he never had a need or desire to really be verbal. so whenever he did/does speak its kinda stifled and uber formal

[miyukisu]

Freak Like Me .ᐟ kinktober ‘24 masterlist inspired by doja cat ❤︎ ╰ incl. kaiju no. 8, jujutsu kaisen, blue lock, bungo stray dogs, haikyuu

a/n - All works are p*rn with plot and written with afab! reader. Read the tags before proceeding with each fic just in case there's a trope included that you're not comfortable with. Masterlist will be updated throughout the month.

1 | On Camera - Cybersex ╰ Now Playing: Cybersex

❤︎ Narumi Gen (Kn8) x reader ╰ You just love teasing your best friend—even better now that he's frustrated and can only see you through a screen (2.1k wc)

2 | I Might Bite - Punishment ╰ Now Playing: Won't Bite

❤︎ Hoshina Soshiro (Kn8) x reader ╰ Resorting to dirty measures like biting your superior during sparring usually doesn't end without you having a taste of your own medicine... (2.6k wc)

3 | Talk Like That - Degradation ╰ Now Playing: Talk Dirty

❤︎ Hiromi Higuruma (JJK) x reader ╰ Who would have thought that your quiet and stoic boss had such a dirty side to him? (2.7 wc)

4 | There Ain't No Man Like You - Shower Sex ╰ Now Playing: Streets

❤︎ Toji Fushiguro (JJK) x reader ╰ People normally talk it out when they have a feud with someone, but you two? You decide to bury the hatchet by showering together (2.2k wc)

5 | Took Me For a Ride - Cockwarming ╰ Now Playing: Ride

❤︎ Geto Suguru (JJK) x reader ╰ It's raining pretty hard outside—good thing there are more ways than one when it comes to warming yourselves up... (1.6k wc)

6 | Between Me and You - Exhibitionism ╰ Now Playing: Often

❤︎ Michael Kaiser (Bllk) x reader ╰ While your other friends are enjoying themselves on your little camping trip, you and Kaiser were secretly fucking around (3k wc)

7 | If You're Down, Boy - Hate Sex ╰ Now Playing: Go To Town

❤︎ Karasu Tabito (Bllk) x reader ╰ Karasu thinks you've got quite a mouth on you—time for him to show you what he can do with his too and make you shut up (3k wc)

8 | Breakfast in Bed - Somnophilia ╰ Now Playing: Morning Light

❤︎ Sae Itoshi (Bllk) x reader ╰ Trouble in paradise? Well, Sae has an early morning treat for you to fix that (2.5k wc)

9 | Need Your Lips On Mine - Edging ╰ Now Playing: Kiss Me More

❤︎ Dazai Osamu (BSD) x reader ╰ You'd think he'd be more enthusiastic to get his hands on you because of the whole 'secret relationship' thing, but maybe it's time to turn the tables (2.3k wc)

10 | Better Bite the Bullet - First Times ╰ Now Playing: Gun

❤︎ Iwaizumi Hajme (Hq) x reader ╰ He's just trying to be a good best friend by teaching you a useful skill in life... blowjobs (2k wc)

©miyukisu do not repost/reupload/translate any of my works on other platforms

[marichild]

bsd fanfic recs

some of my absolute favorite fics I’ve read in the few months I’ve been insane about bsd. what are you guys doing if you haven’t read these.

tell me we do not live in vain by @valleykey・fyozai・57.1k, T, completed・relationship study・character study・travel fic

Fyodor’s weak heart thuds violently within its cage of flesh and bone, ba-thump. Dazai’s knife kisses cold on the skin of their throat. They swallow, and the bob of their Adam’s apple against it draws blood. “Alright,” Fyodor decides, “let’s find a way to die.”

// In the Decay’s aftermath, Fyodor and Dazai quietly slip through the cracks, and set on a journey.

through the pages by @valleykey・oda & dazai・5.3k, gen, completed・alternate universes

Near-infinity is finite. It’s not even close to real infinity. An infinity of coin flips will yield endless heads and endless tails, but it’s possible to flip a coin ten million times and land tails each one. “There’s a lot of bad that could be written in a book.” Oda doesn’t falter. “There’s a lot of good, too.”

///OR: snapshots of Dazai and Oda, across universes.

apocynum by @minusboy・skk・27.8k・M・completed・hanahaki au (with a twist!)

“Don’t bleed on the carpet,” Dazai says, as if it’s even his carpet he’d be bleeding on. “I’ll make you bleed,” he says, although it comes out half-hearted as well as weird and distorted with the tissue blocking his nose. Dazai just smiles at him beatifically. “Promise?”

on fresh wounds and picking on scabs

eternal game of tug & war by @blackwaves・2.9k, explicit, completed・sex dreams・character study

There’s something open, vulnerable, and overwhelmed on her face, and she gasps out the same high, breathy sound she lets out when she’s been running after a suspect, chokes out a string of please, please, please. Ayatsuji watches her do it and says: “This isn’t even maintaining plausibility anymore.” She straightens up. More familiar, there’s indignance on her face— “You can’t be criticizing me for your own sex dream. For one thing.” “It’s a valid critique.”

Or: the sex dream montage fic wherein Ayatsuji is psychosexually weird about all involved.

that fucked up girl by @strawberry-skies-xx・dazai & yosano・3.1k, gen, completed・gender study

The first time Dazai meets Yosano, he’s struck with such a strong wave of want that it catches in his throat, clogs it until he can’t speak. It doesn’t happen often. Dazai’s masks are carefully crafted, but Yosano is all sharp femininity, sleek and elegant, graceful in her beauty, and it hits Dazai like a brick. He stares.

i had a dream about you by @neurosasuke・gin & kyouka・5.5k, gen, completed・character study・relationship study

Her fingers clenched around the cone carton in her hand, crushing her precious breakfast into mush. “Senpai,” Kyouka said, her tone flattened by an iron. This couldn’t be happening. Akutagawa Gin met her eyes with an implacable stare. In one hand she held three fabric bags full of fresh produce from the vendors around them, and in the other was a cup of unsweetened milk tea. The pearls rattled as Gin took a long sip from her drink. The duo held eye contact until Gin concluded her task with a noisy smack of her lips. “Izumi,” Gin greeted sweetly, her voice barely able to be heard over the sounds of the early crowd. “Since when did you start shopping here?”

love that doesn’t have a place to rest by @blackwaves・gin-centric・1.9k, gen, completed・beast au gin

There are no good ways to say, I love my brother, and I think he is evil, and no good rooms to say it in.

Or: Gin, after it’s done.

oh, the echoes in my mind— by @nyrlthtp・sigma-centric・2k, gen, completed・sigma character study

It’s a name they’ve taken for themself, but it’s true to who they are now. They don’t remember ever having another name, and they doubt they ever will remember. They dance around questions about their past with an elegant skill that would be impressive to anyone who knew what to look for. Their words don’t falter, and neither do their hands as they deal out cards at tables themself, glossing over their own deep sorrow that’s salved by the casino and the casino alone. One would think they’d been at this casino for their entire life.

bleeding heart dove by @minusboy・skk・4.2k, M, completed・character study・telepathy

He thinks about Chuuya, or rather, he thinks about the god residing under his skin, the manic glint in his eye, head thrown back in laughter, exposing the delicate line of his throat, thinks about gravity twisting his bones into inhuman angles, the blood pouring out of every orifice on his body. He thinks about Chuuya, beautiful, frightening, human.

learning how to let go and how to drive, not necessarily in that order

hold the hand of the god-child, as he falls from the sky by @strawberry-skies-xx・dazai & mori・7k, gen, completed・relationship study

Mori stands up, walking over to see the empty cup of matcha resting on the armrest, curled loosely in one hand, and Dazai sound asleep. He’s so small like this, lost in the big clothing, the couch he’s on. Not for the first time, Mori wonders what he’d do if he wasn’t head of the mafia. If he’d still find Dazai. If he could help him with more than stitches and hot tea.

till death, I’ll give you my breath by @booksandpaperss・skk・24.6k, M, ongoing・time/death loop・relationship study

“Here’s what’s gonna happen,” Chuuya starts, conviction (and probably some desperation) firm in his voice. “Neither of us are gonna leave this damn room. Call in sick, or whatever the fuck I don’t care, but you’re not going into work, or anywhere today. I’ll fucking hold you down just like this if I have to. Got it?” Dazai cocks his head, and Chuuya can tell he’s really trying hard to maintain the bored look on his face. Chuuya’s known Dazai long enough to recognize when he’s curious. “Am I being held hostage by the mafia right now? Is that what’s happening?”

In which Dazai succeeds in the death he’s always longed for, and Chuuya and Atsushi will do whatever it takes to save the man who saved them before they even realized they were being saved. However many times it takes.

A study in loving someone who refuses to be loved.

Last Train Home by @valleykey・sigma-centric・27.1k, gen, completed・character study・post canon

In the Decay’s aftermath, the Port Mafia’s Nakahara Chuuya finds Sigma among the sunlit silvers of Suribachi city. He grins viciously. “In that case, let’s get you your Casino back.”

/// Sigma picks up their pieces.

in the mirror, i bloom by ephemeralis・skk・12k, T, completed・hanahaki au

It twists him, turns him, curls in his chest like something alive, something he knows but can’t dare to name. Chuuya curses the red-black petals that fall from his lips, these nearly rotten things that tear him apart from the inside out. Part of him wants to rip his own traitorous heart out, through a ribcage shattered by feelings he can’t contain. Anger is easy, a thing he’s learned to control. This— whatever the hell this is— is not. Or at least it’s easier to feel as though this is beyond his own control, because Chuuya is not in love. (It feels like a lie even to himself.)

After he’s hit by a strange ability, Chuuya is forced to consider truths he’d much rather keep hidden- but not everything is as simple it seems.

brutal out here! by @valleykey・fyozailai・4.8k, T, completed・suicide practice fic minus actual suicide

“Oh my God,” Nikolai gasps into the phone, because he can’t let there be a pause, because—”you’re killing yourselves and you didn’t even invite me!?” “Not really,” Fyodor says, almost diplomatic, “it’s more like practice.” “Roleplay, if you will,” Dazai adds enthusiastically, from what must be the bathtub, “but like, irl. And with the potential to get rushed to the hospital.”

5D Chess With Multiverse Time Travel by @valleykey・fyozai・7.2k, T, completed・teen fyozai meet for the first time

Chuuya’s self restraint breaks. “What are you even doing?” Dazai doesn’t even spare him a glance. “Playing 5D chess with multiverse time travel against the enemy.” Chuuya squints. He has to be fucking with him. “What?” “And I’m losing, Chuuya,” and now he finally looks at him, manic grin snaking across his cheeks, voice plunging from blank to downright giddy. Giddy. What the fuck. “He’s a demon.”

/// OR: Chuuya finds himself in the unfortunate position of witnessing Dazai meet Fyodor.

abominable by @valleykey・fyodor-centric・5.3k, M, completed・character study

You’re seven when your ability awakens. You calculate how long it’ll be until anyone finds the bodies. You take a shower before the blood dries, change clothes, and don’t sleep the entire night. When the sun rises, you go to church.

///OR: Fyodor, through the years.

some say we’re born into the grave by @obsidianstrawberrymilk・kouyou & kyouka・5.2k, T, completed・idol au・relationship study

“Now, Kyouka? Really? You’re about to be on stage in one of the biggest festivals in the nation and you’re crying about something?” Kyouka debates telling her it had been unintentional, and barely ‘crying’ at all, but decides against it; if anything, talking back makes it worse. Kouyou’s nails dig further into her skin; not enough to bleed and unlikely to bruise, Kyouka knows. Not her face - too valuable. Kyouka can’t say there’s any bitterness there; it’s a fact. Music is what she’s good at, and Kouyou directs where she goes with it. Failure is not an option. Not in this world she’s found herself in.

Or: Kouyou Ozaki is idol Kyouka Izumi’s manager. How Kyouka feels about it isn’t anyone’s concern.

scream into the empty (can anybody hear me?) by @obsidianstrawberrymilk・gin & ryuunosuke・4k, T, completed・selective mutism・character study

Gin never realizes that there’s something wrong with them until age twelve, when their brother joins the Port Mafia, and them alongside him. Suddenly, their silence is not just offhand on the side of useful; it’s noticeable. It’s abnormal. It’s something that makes them a target.

Or: Gin Akutagawa, growing up, and selective mutism.

[welivetodream]

✨ My BSD hot takes/unpopular opinions ✨:

1. Identifying BSD characters as Queer, is not problematic. STOP being so Heteronormative. Gay characters are not gonna kill you.

If I see another "BuT tHe ChArAcTeRs nEvEr SaId tHeY aRe GaY" I would bomb you 💣/j

2. Skk/SSKK/Fyolai/other popular ships, exist because people like it. If you don't ship them, don't engage with their content. Not all shippers act crazy and toxic. Stop blaming everything on shippers.

3. Atsushi/Kyouka is problematic, stop justifying it with "only 4 year age gap". Kyouka is a CHILD, ship her with Kenji if you want. Atsushi, like a normal 18 year old would never look at a highschool freshman and date her. Even if they date in the future, he knew her when she was younger and they had a sibling like dynamic. Lucy is a way better love interest to Atsushi (Don't know if this is an unpopular opinion tho, but I saw some people justifying it 😐😐😐)

4. DAZAI IS NOT EVIL. HE IS FAR FROM EVIL. He is, despite being super popular and the face of BSD, the most mischaracterized and villified character. Morally grey characters exist??!!!

5. Mori is a way worse person than Dazai ever was.

6. PM members get a free pass for any heinous crime they commit by being hot or babygirl-ified (still love them tho, we do not often discuss how bad their actions have been, you can like criminals and acknowledge they are criminals in fiction. I would add DoA to this too, but it's worse with the PM)

7. Akutagawa's abuse of Kyouka shouldn't be forgotten just because Dazai abused Akutagawa.

8. Mori emotionally manipulated and abused Dazai when he was a teen. Just because it wasn't physical, doesn't mean it was nothing.

9. Atsushi is NOT a soft boy, he is way bitter, salty and sarcastic than we give him credit

10. Poe is important to Ranpo and their friendship/relationship is wholesome as hell

11. Ranpo and Yosano's friendship is way better than them being in a relationship in the future

12. FukuFuku is better than Fukumori (imo!!!!)

13. Buying real authors work after watching BSD is actually a really good thing, since more Gen z kids (or other people) will read classics

14. There are layers to Atsushi and Akutagawa relationship/rivalry, and they have the MOST important relationship (not meaning romantic, just in general) in the entire canon.

15. Kunikida and Yosano could be a power couple

16. Fyodor is not a great villain (yet)

17. Nikolai CARRIES the DoA

18. Sigma shouldn't be in the ADA, he needs a happy home, family and some time to adjust to normal life

19. Q and Elise are both underused characters and could become a great dynamic

20. Ango deserves more love, the amount of pressure and stress he deals with is INSANE

21. It's OKAY if everyone joins the fandom for Dazai or skk (I did at first too!!)

22. Higuchi is annoying as hell. I do not get her hype, I like her but not as much as most people (just personal opinion, do not flame me 😭)

23. Everyone in The Guild is forgettable or boring (except Fitzgerald, Poe and Lucy. I like Louisa, but I forget her all the time)

24. Hetero ships are just not that great/interesting in BSD to me 🤷🏻‍♀️ (except maybe AtsuLucy or rare pairs) and female characters are not best utilised, I wish they play more major roles (can't wait for Agatha to arrive!!)

25. Some fan theories/arts get the story better than "canon" stuff at times. Fanon is NOT always the worst (sometimes enjoyable when the canon gets too dark or sad)

26. Toxic ships are okay in fiction as long as they are legal. Humans like toxic things, we consume it like junk food 💅🏻

(These are all personal opinions of mine and do not matter. Feel free to disagree. But, do not hate or be toxic!!!! 😇😇😇😇)

(PS: I compiled all these because of posts I have seen in, Reddit, Pinterest, Twitter and sometimes Tiktok. These aren't really abt you Tumblr folks. I meant to post this on reddit but did not have the courage or mental strength lol)

[asher-agere]

Ooh Ashh i dreamed about little dazai and cg oda /gen. Now i can't stop thinking about them...

Also i woke up inspired? Maybe i'll try to continue writing my fic :>

Recently i've been thinking about creating a blog more personal to me, tho i'd only use it when using the computer, for some reasons. Then i'd feel comfortable not being on anon all the time hahahha (im shy and anxious all the time </3) what do ya think? I have sooo many headcannons about bsd, i think the blog would be just for them...

Love ya! -🦭

(Talking about anon stuff, if this isn't in anon mode, please ignore it... i say this because recently i had an ask of mine answered (not from you!) and it wasn't on anon mode and ot kinda freaked me out a bit hahahah)

I’VE BEEN WANTING TO RESPOND TO THIS ONE FOR SO LONG. FOR SO MANY REASONS? For starters baby Dazai and caregiver Odasaku is one of my favorites. They’re one of the few cases I actually view as a solid parental bond rather than the caregiver just being a vague role. Plus you should absolutely make a personal blog! Cause that means I can support you and interact with you more! Plus we always need more BSD agere content. Also an ask not in anon mode must’ve been so scary… Hopefully nothing bad came from it? (That’s also another reason supporting personal blog :^)

Little Dazai + Caregiver Odasaku

ੈ✩‧₊˚༺˖⁺‧₊˚ ♡ ˚₊‧⁺˖༻ੈ✩‧₊˚

₊ ⊹ These two have known each other since Dazai was 14, Odasaku has seen first hand that Dazai was forced to grow up way too fast. And well. He’s always had a soft spot for kids. Dazai is no different. Dazai regresses to 2-5, which is just a bit younger than the orphans Odasaku takes care of! I don’t remember exactly what age he took the orphans in at but surely he dealt with them when they were at least somewhat in that age range, so he’d got experience! With Dazai’s age range specifically! This makes him even better at taking care of Dazai!

₊ ⊹ Odasaku is a writer! You know what that means? All the bedtime stories ever! He writes his own bedtime stories to read to Dazai, he’ll turn Dazai’s babbling tales into a story, Dazai can even help him write! A lot of the time Dazai just wants to hear his caregivers voice, he doesn’t care what’s being said, so Odasaku will just talk about some writing ideas he’s had! Dazai is happy to supply his ideas! Odasaku tones them down a bit of course, and doesn’t always use them (Cats with laser eyes don’t really fit into a story about pirates… But maybe a pirate ship can have a cat aboard)

₊ ⊹ I think Odasaku has tried before to let Dazai play with his orphans, he thought it would be a good idea! But… Dazai gets overwhelmed really easily, especially while he’s regressed. Not to mention jealousy and all those other yucky emotions! Odasaku is his. Just his. Plus what if these kids think he’s weird? They wouldn’t of course, Odasaku didn’t raise them to be judgmental. But still… And he’ll lash out with bites or hitting if he gets to overwhelmed! Needless to say that’s a play date that only happens once

₊ ⊹ Lashing out is a common thing with Dazai. Most babies have the instinctive reaction to cry when things go wrong, Dazai learned very young that crying doesn’t help you. Fighting does. He feels bad after of course! He never wants to hurt Odasaku! But Odasaku reassures him that it’s ok! He never uses a harsh tone, always just gently reminds Dazai “We don’t hurt” If Dazai is so overwhelmed he won’t listen to reason though a swaddle is the solution! Wrap him up nice and tight in a blanket so he can’t move much, a pacifier in his mouth so he can’t bite or scream, then they stay like that until Dazai wears himself out! He never got a chance to show his true emotions. So if a tantrum is how he chooses to express those emotions of course Odasaku allows him to get it all out

₊ ⊹ Nicknames!! Odasaku uses the sweetest pet names for his baby, and everything sounds so poetic when he says it! “Sweetheart” is definitely a big one, but he can’t be to sweet with pet names or Dazai gets defensive, so he’ll also use more casual ones like “Buddy”! There’s also “Little One” but that has to be used carefully! Only when Dazai is right on the edge of regressing, usually when he’s a little worn out and less likely to fight it. And then of course! What does Dazai call Odasaku? I view them as a father son relationship because. Even regression aside I view them that way. Regression just makes it feel even cozier. So I think Dazai calls him “Da”. He’s trying to say “Oda” But to many syllables… Odasaku points out that it sounds like “Dada” and Dazai denies it if course! But… That’s his “Da” he stops even trying to say “Oda”

₊ ⊹ I think that when Dazai’s in more of a toddler headspace they play a lot of card games! It’s very nostalgic for them considering they played a lot of card games when they first met. Like a lot a lot. It was how they bonded! Of course Dazai always calls Odasaku out on cheating, in response Odasaku calls out Dazai’s clumsy attempts at hiding cards up his sleeve. Dazai of course denies this, and Odasaku denies his own cheating. This usually leads to Dazai pouting, but nothing on tantrum level! Just upset he isn’t getting his way. Odasaku tried betting with candy before but the Dazai takes it to serious and it does ends in a tantrum

₊ ⊹ Dazai is weird with food, he’s noted to be underweight, especially in Mafia Era (The only time Odasaku was alive) Baby Dazai only drinks milk or formula. No solid foods. He’s a baby through and through. However toddler Dazai plays a silly game with Odasaku! He requests specific ways for all his food to be poisoned and Odasaku says he does it! For example if Dazai requests a poisonous flower, Odasaku takes a harmless flower and puts it in the dish in front of Dazai! Odasaku has to make his own food separate though to keep up the illusion. Dazai refuses to let Odasaku eat the ‘poisoned’ food

ੈ✩‧₊˚༺˖⁺‧₊˚ ♡ ˚₊‧⁺˖༻ੈ✩‧₊˚

This was supposed to be up way earlier, but where I live there’s no power. Anywhere- On the entire island- So that’s fun. So posting might be slow the next couple of days. But I finished this while my parents were using the generator! So yay! Also I keep bring inbox notifications but then there’s nothing there… Kinda weirded out

[kaiserkisser]

welcome

" i'm tired already. after all, till the very end, i never did understand what i was born for. "

STATUS: gaming, locking in for studiese

⋆ᯓ ᡣ𐭩 skylia

⋆ᯓ ᡣ𐭩 certified diehard xiao, kaiser, dan heng, lucifer, dazai and chuuya kisser (im totally normal for them all i swear (im lying)), currently hyperfixating on bsd a bit too much

⋆ᯓ ᡣ𐭩 major dazai, mafuyu and sigma kinnie, eternally the world's best overthinker; i selfship with xiao, kaiser and lucifer !

⋆ᯓ ᡣ𐭩 multifandom main/ interaction blog

⋆ᯓ ᡣ𐭩 irl bestie- @damyoujackson <3 (ur more slay bro ilysm)

⋆ᯓ ᡣ𐭩 family!!!!!!! @meowmaii , @thegolden-tigeress , @losairr , @moongasux !!!!!

── .✦ links:- about me || rules/byf || my beloved mutuals 1 | mutuals 2 || tagging system || carrd || about donation asks || notes challenge ✦.──

˚₊‧꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚ please note!

-please keep in mind that i shitpost and ramble and reblog a lot on this blog. also, please do read the rules and byf !!!!

-i may take time to respond depending on how im feeling and how busy i am. please dont mind that, thank you :) i also have major social anxiety send help how do u interact with ppl TvT

-i use a lot of small emoticons and tonetags especially, and i keyboard smash and type in caps a lot. i also often use terms of endearment like dearest, beloved, bby etc. if youre not alright with that pls lmk/dm me and ill avoid it.

-if im being annoying or interacting with u too much pls do lmk !!!! i will take no offence /gen bc i wanna make sure everyone is comfortable on my blog <3

₊˚⊹ ⁀➴ ᰔ‧₊˚⊹ dni -> 18+ only blogs ,NSFW blogs, bots, haters, proshippers, general dni criteria. If i feel uncomfortable I will block you. Please avoid interacting with me if you are above 25-30 or so unless you know im comfortable with it (you can ask me first and interacts with my works though)

(other blogs and userboxes utc-i mostly rb bsd stuff on bsd sb)

୨ৎ writing blog: @xiaosonlybeloved (i write for bsd, genshin, and bllk as of now)

୨ৎ mutuals ONLY can ask for my mootsonly and vent blogs, selfship sb: @lia-forever <3

୨ৎ bsd sb: @chuuya-kisser (insanely active there)

୨ৎ art sb: @skylia-draws

୨ৎ yukiyo rp blog (bsd oc) : @fallingdaydreams

୨ৎ 18! dazai rp blog: @mackerel-executive ; modern au dazai rp blog: @modernzai (pls interact with me lmfao)

୨ৎ poetry sb: @lia-feels

୨ৎ if you find my old jjk blog good for you

࿔‧ ֶָ֢˚˖𐦍˖˚ֶָ֢ ‧࿔ currently doing: reading fics, watching ouran, scrolling on pinterest

putting this and this and this and this here bc i want to read everything

old pinned

thank you for your time :)

icon by @spider-lily-infestation , header and other pics in post by @nyctolycoris

[mangocatofficial]

Bungou Stray Dogs: New Gen Official Art!

Tazuko Sakane, a character featured in BSD: New Gen. Tazuko Sakane is known as the first Japanese female director. Her story is very interesting and inspiring and I am very happy to have her as a character. Her struggles and successes have all accumulated to become a very fun character to write and learn more about.

Chapters 1 and 2 of BSD: New Gen coming soon- February 14!Check my earlier post for more details. https://www.tumblr.com/mangocatofficial/773151233486864384/new-bsd-fanfic-coming-out-soon?source=share

[lanterns-and-lightmares]

Meet us!

Well, first, have an extremely WIP pronouns.cc page.

Next, my account for the Pro-endo court where you can share your system stories!

The Scribe’s House Before you ask me for donations, please read this post.

Our AO3:

Heyo! We’re a nondisordered mixed origins system of, uh… (checks notes) 47 including the host/“original”!

We are bodily 16! DNI: Anti-endo, racist, homophobic, Pedo/MAP, Zoophile, TransID EXCEPT GOOD-FAITH IDENTITIES, transphobic, enby or acephobic, anti-good faith identities, Anti-Semitic, pro-Trump, pro-zionism, SHblr/SH-posting (I don’t want to see that), pro-ED, pro-SH, believers of “NPD abuse”, people who post porn (nothing against you, it’s your body and/or your art and you choose what to do with it, but I genuinely hate seeing it so please don’t interact with me if you post it. If it’s photos of a real person who is not you, though, I do not like you, please go touch grass.), JK Rowling supporters (people who like Harry Potter are fine as long as you don���t support JKR), Neil Gaiman supporters (people who like Good Omens, The Sandman, etc are fine as long as you don’t support Neil Gaiman), people who ship incest or child x adult

I am RQ neutral unless you support harmful paraphilias, in which case DNI. I don’t think I know enough about RQ to form an opinion.

PLEASE DO NOT ASK ME FOR DONATIONS. I do not have a payment app, nor a credit card, nor much money, so I cannot help you. I have asked multiple times so please stop asking.

Here are our members:

Cait (She/Her)

The heck do I put here? Hi, you can call me Cait, I’m the host of this chaotic little bundle!

Doppo Kunikida (He/Him) 📓

Hello, my name is Doppo Kunikida. I do not like Gen A slang or general obnoxiousness. It’s nice to meet you.

Lullaby (She/her) 😴

Hi, I’m Lullaby, a brain-made willogenic headmate! I really like snow, sleeping, plushies, things like those. I don’t front a lot.

Kenji Miyazawa (He/him) 🐮

Hi! I’m Kenji from BSD, I like animals and farming and music and theater and stuff like that!

Alastor (He/Him) 😁

Greetings! My name is Alastor and I’m from some old Hazbin Hotel roleplay on Fandom (as in, from before the show even aired)! It’s very nice to meet you!

Kazuo (He/Him) 🐱

Hi!!! I’m Kazuo! I’m an OC, I’m also Kenji’s best friend! It’s nice to meet you! I really like cats, the big city, music, theater, stuff like that!

Joker (He/him) ☮️

Joker is from a story I (host) used to be a part of. He doesn’t front a lot, but he’s a really sweet guy.

Mikado (He/him) 🔌

Oh, hello. I’m Mikado Sannoji. Please don’t judge me by my actions in source. I’m from an incomplete comic host was making called Danganronpa: Infinite Encore.

Engel (He/him) 📝

Hey, I’m Engel! My source is Fundamental Paper Education. It’s nice to meet you.

Winnie (He/him) ❄️

Heyyy, I’m Winnie from Cold Front! I really like music and general happiness.

Augustine (He/him) 🔥

Hey, I’m from Cold Front. Winnie and I are partners. It’s nice to meet you.

Light (He/they) 💡

Heyyy, I’m a super canon-divergent Omori fictive!

Harrison Finn Tailor (He/him) 🎧

I bet nobody knows my source… haha, anyway! You can call me Harry. I’m from essentially how my host would have written Inescapable: No rules no rescue. It’s a pleasure!

Orion (She/her) 💜

Hello, I’m Orion. I am Brainmade. I do not talk a lot. Not a lot of us do.

Rambley (He/him) 🦝

Hiiiii! I’m Rambley from Indigo Park! I love making new friends! I have no idea what else to put here!

Nicole (She/her) 🧩

Sup I’m from class of 09 and I’m our resident “evil alter”, I like ruining my headmate’s lives in Oregon Trail and teasing them about shit.

Mori 🎆

Hello! My name is Ougai Mori. My pronouns are he/him. I enjoy interacting with others, especially sourcemates. My best friend is Yukichi, also from the Falling Stars. I can be a bit of a jittery mess. I do want to be a good parent figure, although I’m not sure how good I actually am. :)

Fukuzawa (He/him) 🐈

Hello, I’m Yukichi Fukuzawa. I don’t know what to put here, but, er, I like cats. Ougai and I are actually not from canon Bungo Stray Dogs, but since our source does not technically exist, canon BSD will work for sourcemates.

Fedya 🪄

AUtive from the fanfic “Damned Angels”, or at least the plans for it. Also known as Fyodor. He/him. Middle (15 years old). Please feel free to talk to me about my source.

Kolya (he/him) ♠️

Hiiii, I’m Kolya! I share a source with Fedya. I really like Quidditch and flying in general! I have a pet owl named Three-Of-Hearts. What else should I put here?

Soren (he/him) 🦡

Hello, pleasure to meet you. I’m Soren, the host’s Hogwarts Legacy protagonist. I’m a Hufflepuff. I really enjoy exploring the world around me.

Gold (he/it) 🪙

Hey there, I’m a gold watcher! I don’t know what else to put here! But it’s nice to meet you!

Niko (he/him) 🖲️

👋 I’m Niko! My source is Nanbaka! I don’t know what else to put here!

Vanitas (he/him) 📖

Hey there, my name is Vanitas. I’m a vampire doctor, I guess? I don’t know what to put here. But it’s good to be here, even though I sometimes wanna go home.

Phineas “Finny” Thatch (he/him) 🛡️

Hey there, I’m Phineas Thatch, former member of the trust. Nice to meet you.

Rui Kamishiro (he/him) 🎵

Hello there, my name is Rui, my source is PJSK! It’s a pleasure to meet you!

Giorgio (He/him) 🔎

Hey, I’m Giorgio! I’m from Ace Romanc— Just kidding! My source is The Art Of Murder!

Seishi Yokomizo (He/him) 📚

Hey, I’m Yokomizo! I’m from a BSD-crossover fanfic thing host is writing!

Mushitaro Oguri (He/him) 🔑

Hi. I’m Mushitaro. I share a source with Yokomizo.

Ranpo Edogawa (He/him) 🕵️

Heyyy, I’m Ranpo, I share a source with the two idiots (/aff) above me!

Edgar Allan Poe (He/him) 🐦‍⬛

Hello, I’m Poe, I share a source with Mushitaro, Ranpo, and Yokomizo.

Noé Archiviste (He/him) 🥧

Hey! I’m Noé, nice to meet you! I hope we’ll get along! I’m from VNC, by the way.

Montgomery Gator (He/it) ⛳️

Hey, there! I’m Montgomery Gator, from FNAF Security Breach! And I have no idea what else to put here so that’s all you’re getting!

Dave Miller (He/him) ���

Hello, I’m from Dayshift at Freddy’s! For the record I am sorry about what I did in games 1 and 2 of my source. Anyways hiiii!

Johann (He/him) 💕

Why, hello! My name is Johann, from VNC! Great to be here!

Luka (He/him) 🎤

No.

Ivan (He/they) 🖤

I do not entirely understand what’s going on here, but according to the others I’m from an AU made by my host.

Cheng Xiaoshi (He/him) 📸

Hi there! I’m from Link Click, I think! Nice to meetcha!

Lu Guang (He/him) 🕰️

Hey there, I’m Cheng Xiaoshi’s friend and sourcemate. I’m hoping I get along with people here. I like cats, reading, and photography.

Kazuichi Soda (He/him) 🦈

Heyo! I’m Kazuichi, and I’m actually from a fanfic we’re reading! It’s pretty cool. Not for me, I get stuck in a time loop and it sucks, but I think other people would like reading it if that’s their thing!

Oleander (She/her) 🐻

Hiyeeee, I’m a Danganronpa fictive but I’m not sharing which one!

Eito Aotsuki (He/him) 🐞

Hey, my source is Hundred Line: Last Defense Academy, and for the record I do want to be a nice person. It’s nice to meet you!

Nagito Komaeda (He/him) 🍀

Hi, you can call me Komaeda. I’m not exactly from Danganronpa, I’m from a rewrite of DR3’s despair arc that our host is doing. Nice to meet you!

Shin Tsumiki (He/him) 🧑‍💻

Hey there. My source is an AU of Your Turn To Die. That’s really all I have to say, sorry.

Jou Tazuna (He/him) 🐶

Hi! I’m from the same source as Shin! You can call me Joe! Nice to meet you!

Garry (He/they/wilt) 🥀

Why, hello there. My name is Garry, I’m from a game called Ib, I believe. It’s a pleasure!

Geiju Tsubaraya (He/him) 🎨

Hey there. I’m from some Yansim thing host wants to make. I don’t know what else to put here.

(RP Blogs under the cut)

RP BLOGS

@no-longer-crabfries - Osamu Dazai (BSD)

@fuck-it-go-my-fyodor-rp-blog and @the-archangel-rat - Alternate Fyodor Dostoyevsky(s) (BSD)

@port-mafias-attack-dog - Ryuunosuke Akutagawa (BSD)

@notag0vagent - Ango Sakaguchi (BSD)

@karma-port-mafia - Karma (BSD)

@egg-with-shell - Tecchou Suehiro (BSD)

@hermit-hacker - Katai Tayama (BSD)

@twains-digital-adventure-diary - Mark Twain (BSD)

@dave-round-the-clock - Not entirely RP, but Dave Miller (DSAF)

@ask-dr-angel - Noah Olsen (Protagonist of my Poppy Playtime fanfic)

@raven-not-crow - Poe (Poppy Playtime, technically the same fanfic as Noah, not actually a canon character)

@adamcriticizes - Adam (Hazbin Hotel, of the Self Aware AU variety)

@ivan-got-isekaid - Ivan (ALNST, but he isekaid into BSD’s world)

[noapendragon]

one, two, three, four, five, six

rules: give us the links to your fics with the most hits, second most kudos, third most comments, fourth most bookmarks, fifth most words, and fic with the fewest words.

@anticidic left this open and it looked fun so i'm joining in!!

most hits: you're in my head more often than i want (i wish i could talk to you)

[bsd, rated t] this is definitely not my most well written fic in terms of actual writing quality (i did not even edit it before i posted it which pains me to this day) but i'm actually really proud of this one. it was so fun to write and it's my most popular in both hits and kudos which i think is deserved!!

second most kudos: no hesitation, what are we waiting for? we talk too much

[haikyuu, rated gen] this was a birthday gift for a friend, and although it's not a ship i enjoy that much, she really liked it and that's what matters to me!! i also didn't edit this before posting it. that also haunts me.

third most comments: no, i'm not afraid to disappear; the end is here

[bsd, rated t] my atsushi character study!! i did in fact cry writing this but uh. i'm proud of how it turned out. also lots of taniatsu crumbs because i can't resist.

fourth most bookmarks: also the haikyuu birthday gift fic. i'm going to cheat slightly because i don't want to put the same thing twice so this is third most bookmarks: i don't wanna let you down (nobody loves me like you do)

[bsd, rated gen] this was my first fic for sigma week and i think it ended up being the most popular. i preferred others from that week while writing but this one has grown on me since writing it.

least words: i can't find my chill, i must have lost it! i don't even know, i'm talking nonsense

[bsd, rated gen] I ADORE THIS ONE. i had a little idea for this fic for ages and then i just sat down and wrote the whole thing in one sitting, then edited and posted the next day. taniatsu are so soft and silly in this it's one of my favourites like ever.

[foundedroses]

BSD HEADCANONS: JOUNO SAIGIKU

W/C: 0.4k

C/W: smut. mention of; bdsm, bondage, spanking, degrading, hair pulling.

A/N: okay so its been a hot fucking minute since ive actually gone onto tumblr to give writing a little itty bitty go... since i havet been on in a while, BUT THATS IN THE MFING PAST. Now im writing again because im bored as fuck. SO, here are some headcanons for my pookie, wookie, little meow meow Jouno. I chose to write BOTH SFW and NSFW headcanons on the same post because i gen couldnt be fucked making TWO SEPERATE POSTS when i can just conjoin them as one. but yayayyayayay

ـــــــــــــــــــﮩ٨ـ

SFW

𓏵 Since Jouno has been blind for as long as he can possibly remember, having no sigh is basically first nature to him, hence his heightened senses.

𓏵 His sense of smell is obviously quite sensitive, meaning strong scents can easily trigger/set him off.

𓏵 During the spring (or summer weather, idk), this guy gets terrible hay fever to the point where this mf is 2x more miserable than shit.

𓏵 Jouno has pretty frequent mood swings; like one moment he is chill, and the next he is his usual sarcastic, sadist like self. wonders if he has bipolar sometimes...

𓏵 This fucker likes making random bets for no fucking reason. Like bets on the stupidest shit known to man guy. and Tecchou is the poor bastard included in these bets of his

𓏵 HATES CHILDREN. Just does. no reason for it...but he fucking hates 'em.

𓏵 Despite being actually blind, he knows his way around a kitchen and can actually cook quite well (nobody ever sees him actually cook anythng though...its just a claim)

𓏵 Prone to headaches and migraines.

𓏵 He hates winter because he gets cold quite easily.

𓏵 but then he also hates summer because he gets hot too easisly...

𓏵 so in layman terms...he hates most seasons

𓏵 If you ask him a fuckass question, he will give you a fuckass response (should be a given hehhe) 𓏵 Because he visually cannot read, Jouno does spend time listening to audiblebooks or e-books whatever tf you wanna call them

𓏵 but he can read braille

NSFW

𓏵 When it comes to sex, Jouno is pretty sadistic...there is probably no doubt about it and im pretty much a core believer of this hc.

𓏵 Dacryphilia is SUCH a massive turn on for this lil bastard. but of course not out of pain...

𓏵 the last thing he wants is to make his s/o cry out of pain instead of pelasure.

𓏵 on the topic of kinks, Jouno fucks with a bit of BDSM/bondage in the bedroom...

𓏵 loves restraining his s/o, spanking his s/o..yeah all that fun stuff.

𓏵 Degrades...a lot. gets basically high off of it

𓏵 FUCK AND HAIR PULLING...

𓏵 BUT...aftercare is always a thing with this guy, and especially after some rough-ass sex.,

𓏵 This man is the biggest tease known to walk the face of this damn earth....

𓏵 Pretty much dominate as one can get - loves positions like doggy style, but he does not mind having his s/o on top like in cowlgirl

𓏵 Even though this man is blind, he still knows EXACTLY where and how to touch his s/o to get them going...

[blue-thief]

Ok. Thoughts on the Itoshi Sibs / their parallels with Isagi?

HELLO this took forever for me to answer because summer school and the sadness. as you know.

also i went too crazy with tying blue lock into my fixation with japanese nationalism so it got way too complex and i got scared but now i'm just gonna make that its own post (<- said the same thing about bsd. that analysis about bsd's connection with japanese nationalism has been sitting in my docs for a year now i think)

(smh this is what happens when the japanese imperial army almost wipes out your entire bloodline /gen /srs)

anyway. all that waiting to say that rin is... just some guy to me

usually a fw anime boys named rin. esp if they're the sworn rival of the plain protagonist. not necessarily this one though

i have no clue why he doesn't scratch my brain properly. he just doesn't. i need to spend a good three hours staring at the ceiling at night to figure that out

when you first sent me this i didn't really care for sae much either. now i do

that's how long this has been sitting in my drafts 😃😃

(i've written and scrapped thousands of words for this ask sob sob)

(this answer wasn't even formatted this way originally)

i've probably told you the story of how sae grew on me before but like

i don't plan out my fics right

i do play out random scenes in my head to test out if i like them or not

(shivers because updating my fic is another thing that is taking forever.......)

and i was just fucking around with random jokes kaiser and sae could say to each other

then i imagined sae smiling

and i was like "what the fuck... why is that so endearing........"

that was the turning point but it really was a lot of sitting and contemplating sae's character honestly

to really understand him and why he'd be friends with kaiser

and sae is kinda just like me frfr

that guy can't do anything other than soccer/football. he has nothing going on beyond that

and yeah. yeah... i get that.......

it's the reason why i like a bunch of other bllk characters but it's most pronounced with sae yk

(SORRY MR. SNUFFY)

and like. just his inability to be a normal fucking person 😭😭 too real

anyway those are my general itoshi brothers thoughts

now for the parallels part.

(this is the part that killed me and i wanna go more in-depth. but i'm saving that for another post. because holy shit my original idea was so fucking ambitious)

i had other thoughts and god i wish i wrote that stuff down

but the major thing i want to get into here is dependence

isagi is independent. soo independent it's kinda crazy

this was outlined most during the second selection with bachira where he had to learn to play by himself

meanwhile there's rin who seems independent on the surface

however, rin has always been dependent on sae in one way or another

when they were younger, rin was dependent on sae to take care of and guide him

rin also depended heavily on sae on the field

now that they are older, sae's attempt to shake rin off has just made rin's dependence on sae even more intense, just in a different way

rin's only motivation to play soccer/football had been to "crush" sae

...but now he's met isagi

and his obsession has found a new object

with the recent chapters, now we know he places isagi and sae on a similar level in his personal hierarchy, and his desire to destroy sae has bled into rin's feelings toward isagi

while rin has only one rival, the same can't be said for isagi

isagi gains rivals like pokemon, and while they have all played a significant roll in isagi's development as a person and a character, his obsession doesn't consume him. in the PXG vs BM match, he's doesn't fully comprehend the effect he's had on kaiser and rin

and mannn i wish i could find this analysis, but it's gone now

but someone compared isagi's desire to "devour" to rin and nagi's desire to "kill"

I WISH I COULD REMEMBER EXACTLY WHAT THEY SAID

but from what i remember, "devouring" someone is temporarily defeating them, but both parties ultimately improve so there's room for them to meet again and help each other improve even more

however, "killing" someone is defeating them completely so they're never able to play/improve ever again

which outlines the fact that while isagi can be a little bitch on the field, he wants his rivals to improve alongside him, and in the end, he wants the best for people (in terms of soccer/football)

which is why he never became overly-dependent on bachira and why he treats midfielders as actual human beings 😭😭

isagi is independent, but he pushes for the people around him to be just as independent

the itoshi brothers are different though

rin is codependent on sae, and you could say his hatred/obsession with isagi is a different type of codependency

but that thing about treating midfielders as human beings...

uh. that doesn't really apply to rin

sae is somewhat similar with how he "tamed" shidou but it's not THAT imbalanced lmao

there's also how the three of them are on different places of the striker-midfielder spectrum

in-universe and within the fandom, rin is perceived as japan's ultimate striker. his raw shooting power + metavision makes him perfect for this position.

however sae, another metavision user, is the perfect midfielder

then there's isagi who's tried emulating rin's play style at first but is ultimately most similar to sae, leading people to say that isagi is better suited to be a midfielder rather than a striker

while rin represents what the ultimate japanese striker is, something isagi is trying to reach, sae's path is one that isagi could easily fall down instead

many people have theorized that sae became a midfielder to improve rin's chances at becoming a better striker. sae may be considered to have a strong ego, but if this turns out to be true, that might not be the case lmao

errm. idk how to end this off. sorry for the wait sob sob

[jslmasaysmoneyisbest]

BSD Roleswap Soukoku

Basically all 3 soukoku's generation

Role swap

idk how its gonna work maybe

third gen becomes first

first is second

and second is third

or maybe second is still second

and dazai and Chuuya mentor the first gen

Or maybe

Dazai is fukuzawa and Chuuya is Mori

Mori is atsushi and Fukuzawa is akutagawa

and Atsushi and Akutagawa swap

or more

You can create so many role swaps and stuff

my brain is exploding just imaging very different one

please send help

[whathorselegs]

writing patterns ✨

rules: share the first line of your last ten published works or as many as you are able and see if there are any patterns!

Thank you for tagging me @calmlb !! Go check out their post here for amazing skk fic recs!

Black Coffee and Chocolate Cake (Gen, Chuuya is turned into a kid, multichapter)

If there was one fact about Yokohama’s criminal underbelly Hirotsu was certain of, it was that there was someone up to no good in a warehouse at any given time.

As Fate Would Have It (Chuuya-centric, skk, Chuuya gets a dog, Series)

There was a list that existed in the back of Chuuya’s mind.

Kuma, His Human and the Other One (Skk, Chuuya gets a dog, Pet's POV, Series)

I am a dog.

Breathing Dreams Like Air (Sskk, skk, Great Gatsby AU, multichapter)

To say Atsushi lived a modest life, would be an understatement.

In Over His Head (Teen skk, pre-storm bringer, Physical Hurt/Emotional comfort, multichapter)

“You’ll be going on a very delicate mission this time, Chuuya.”

Shall We Dance? (Kunikidazai, Dancing, Two Parts)

It had been six months since Dazai had officially joined the Armed Detective Agency and in that time he’d gotten to know Kunikida’s scowl quite well.

Junkyard Dog (Teen Skk, Silly Antics, Dazai and Chuuya bickering, One shot)

“I’m actually gonna do it this time.”

Aftermath (skk, horror-ish, Post-Meursault Arc, Chuuya has hallucinations, Angst, One shot)

Chuuya rubbed at his eyes again.

When The World Tears Me In Two, Who Can I Turn To But You (Skk have bad days and comfort each other through it, Two Parts)

The week had not been particularly kind to Chuuya.

The Setting Sun (Skk secretly reunite after Dazai's defection and have a lot to get off their chests, One shot)

The average person would claim a walk through the woods was rejuvenating, that getting back to nature and sucking the fresh air deep into one’s lungs is the perfect cure for an oppressive mood.

--

These are literally all my BSD fics, did not realise I've written 10 of them.

I suppose there are two things I already know I do, or well avoid. I avoid starting with dialogue or the first word being a character's name, because school drilled it into my head that's bad writing, and even though I know that's not true, I still subconsciously do it a lot.

Did not realise a lot of my first sentences were so short though.

Tagging: Leaving this as an open tag for any writer who wants to do this!

[theungracefulpasterie]

Hey! How are you?

I saw that you were open for requests on BSD. Could you write something with Verlaine, or with Dazai? I was thinking of something like, the reader wants to throw a surprise party so they are keeping it a secret from Verlaine/Dazai. How would they react? Would they find out about the surprise, and if yes, would they pretend they didn't know, to let the reader happy? I don't know if it makes that much sense...

Also, another thing, I saw that you speak french so could I ask you to write it in french? It's just cuz I'll have to do a french exam, but sometimes I distract myself from the studies and read fanfics 😅. This way, if you can write it in french I can both read about BSD and train my french.

I'm sorry if it's stupid or doesn't make sense, you're free to ignore this if you'd like, but I would appreciate it if you wouldn't.

Have a nice day 🥰

A/N : Hi, thanks for the request ! Of course I can do it in French, it'll be helpful for both you and I tbh 😅 ! Sorry if I took time to publish as well, I am also held at gunpoint by the exams 😭. I'll write for Verlaine first if it doesn't bother you, then for Dazai in another post if you don't mind ! Anyways, hope you'll like it !

P.O.V : You throw a surprise party for him (Verlaine's part)(in French)

~Verlaine~

Remettons les choses dans leur contexte : Tu n'étais pas un haut gradé dans la Mafia Portuaire, mais tu en es quand même un membre puissant et précieux. C'est pourquoi tu as été affecté par Mori lui-même à superviser la surveillance de ceux que la Mafia gardait captifs, emprisonnés. Et c'est là que tu le rencontres : Paul Verlaine, emprisonné aux tréfonds de la Mafia après un gros incident avec Chuuya que tu n'arrivais toujours pas à comprendre malgré le nombre de fois que ce dernier t'a raconté.

Mais étrangement, quelque chose t'attirait sans cesse vers lui. Plus tu l'observais, plus tu te rendais compte qu'il était vraiment déprimé, comme si tout cet incident l'avait privé de toute joie de vivre. Il te faisait de la peine. À force de l'observer, il finit par te remarquer et parla.

"C'est mal élevé de fixer les gens comme ça", dit-il d'un air sec mais quelque peu humoristique. Son commentaire te surprena et tu te mis à rougir de honte.

"Désolé !! C'est pas ça mais... vous sembliez triste c'est tout...", tu répondis en essayant de fuir son regard. Il te regarda, confus.

"Je vous imaginais beaucoup moins sensible que ça pour quelqu'un qui a l'air si haut placé..."

"Je suis peut-être privilégié ici mais ça ne veut pas dire que je suis un monstre non plus.", tu lui répondis sérieusement. Tu ne sais pas pourquoi, mais t'avais l'impression que ta sincérité l'avait touché. Bon, c'est sûrement une fausse impression...

Après quelques minutes de silence il disa d'une voix douce.

"Ma tristesse se voyait tant que ça ?", tu hochas la tête et t'approchas de sa cellule pour lui faire face.

"Je... je ne peux pas faire partir la tristesse. Mais si ça vous soulage, même si c'est un peu bizarre que ce soit à moi que vous vous confiez, faites-le.", dis-tu comme si vous étiez de vieux amis. À cause de ça, Paul ne pouvait s'empêcher de penser que tu lui rappelais Rimbaud. C'est peut-être pour ça que, étonnement, il se confie à toi.

Et plus les jours, les semaines et les lois passèrent, il te parlait de ce qui l'accablait et le rendait triste. Et ces petites séances de psy se transformaient peu à peu en des discussions normales où vous parliez de tout et de rien, comme des amis. Ça vous rapprochait grandement. Vous aviez commencé à vous tutoyer. Mais vous sentiez tout les deux qu'il y avait une tension en plus. Étonnement, c'est Paul qui a fait le premier pas. Et c'est comme ça que, malgré les barreaux, vous aviez commencé à vous donner des surnoms affectifs et à vous tenir la main et carresser le visage. Vous rêviez que ces barreaux n'existent plus et d'enfin pouvoir vous sentir, l'un contre l'autre complètement.

Pour être honnête, votre rapprochement n'était pas très discret et Chuuya et Mori ont finit par être au courant. Tu avais clairement peur pour ta vie, mais à ta grande surprise, Chuuya te disa rien et Mori accepta même votre relation, à condition que tes sentiments ne contrôlent pas la qualité de ton travail. Et c'est là que tu proposas l'idée d'une fête surprise pour Paul, tellement tu étais content. Tu te rendas tout de suite compte que tu étais peut-être aller trop loin avec cette demande mais encore une fois, Mori accepta de libérer Paul de sa cellule !

Tu ne tenais plus en place ! Tu te mis directement à faire les préparatifs pour que la fête soit la meilleure qui soit, c'est que mérite ton bien-aimé après tout. Malheureusement, le temps que tu prenais pour préparer la fête empiétait sur le rendez-vous quotidien que tu avais avec Paul et il se sentait malheureux.

Tu avais enfin fini. Tu te rendas vite à sa cellule et voyait qu'il était pas aussi heureux de te voir et tu savais pourquoi.

"Chéri, je suis désolé vraiment...", il te faisait la sourde oreille.

"Mais je te jure que ça valait le coup !", tu pris tes clés et ouvrit sa cellule. Le retentissement des clés le fit rapidement relever sa tête, tout confus. Tu lui tendis la main.

"Viens, j'ai quelque chose pour toi !", dis-tu avec un énorme sourire et un peu de rougeur sur tes joues.

Avec des yeux écarquillés de confusion, il hésita quelques secondes avant de prendre ta main. Ça faisait bizarre de vous voir enfin sans quelque chose entre vous, vous aviez envie de vous enlacer pendant des heures, mais tu étais trop pressé de lui montrer sa surprise que tu te mis à courir toujours avec ta main serrée contre la sienne, ce qui lui prit de court car il allait t'entourer de ses bras.

"Est-ce que... est-ce qu'on a le droit de filer en douce comme ça ??", dit-il un peu inquiet de se faire prendre en flagrant délit.

"Oh chut ! Tais-toi et suis-moi ! Tu sais que je le ferais pas si je n'en avais pas le droit !", il réfléchit et hocha la tête en accord avec ce que tu dis. Après ce qui semblaient être des minutes interminables, vous arriviez enfin à une porte.

"Prêt ?!", tu lui demandas avec empressement.

"Je ne sais pas... je pense que oui, peu importe ce que c'est..", dit-il en retour. Tu ouvris donc la porte et tout le monde cria "Surprise !!". Il a eu peur au début et allait utiliser son pouvoir quand il vit une banderole où il était écrit "En l'honneur de Paul" avec un cœur un peu mal fait, malgré tout tes efforts. Il arrivait pas à en croire ses yeux, il avait du mal à former ses mots et te regarda et se perdit dans tes yeux.

"Alors ?", tu demandas, un peu effrayé de sa réponse.

"C'est... c'est vraiment pour moi ?", dit-il la voix tremblante, sentant des larmes se former dans ses yeux contre son gré.

Tu pris son visage entre tes mains et l'embrassa tendrement, pour la première fois, sur ses lèvres. Elles étaient si douces. Ce qui se passait en ce moment semblait irréel pour le manipulateur de gravité. Tu séparas tes lèvres des siennes et le regarda droit dans les yeux.

"Eh ouais... ce n'est pas un rêve mon amour."

Il t'enlaça très fort et te disa :

"Je t'aime.."

"Moi aussi, Paul. Je t'aime.."

Et c'est à ce moment que cette fête surprise symbolisa le départ d'une nouvelle vie pour Verlaine.

A/N : Finallyyy the end 😭. For a first fic, I am pretty happy with how it turned out even though I felt like I quite rushed things towards the end. Hope it is not too long and the buildup until the party isn't too slow for you too. And if I also hope this story will make you understand how French works a little bit more ! And for the others reading this, don't hesitate to translate it :). Next will be the same prompt but with Dazai !