#how his parents died because of his drug addict older brother

[thedevilsfamiliar]

Fic: this is a Apollo/Percy fic, it has no happy ending and there’s MANY tags saying it’s gonna fuck you up

Me: yeah yeah how bad can it be

Me, 4 days later: I. What. WHAT? I can’t. I can’t.

Me, 6 days later: oh my god I— the author is nuts. The author is crazy. I should’ve read the tags.

Me, 10 days later: -angry and crying- the fic was so good I hate it

[jakeysbuttsheeks]

Godfather | 1

Warnings: profanity, age gap , mature themes, mentions of overdose , drug use , substance use , death of parent , orphaning , other weird shit

Pairings : Jake X fem reader

18+ mdni

When Jake was in college he met a guy called Mike , one of the closest guys he was friends with.

Mike was 8 years older than him . He got along really well with Jake's band and with his brothers . He was almost considered family .

Until Mike went down a stump. Addiction to every drug on the planet and god knows what else . Mike ended up have a kid by accident at 18 .

The girl didn't want the kid and gave Mike the responsibility to take care of it. Jake and his brother's helped Mike through fatherhood, although they couldn't do much with his drug addiction.

Mike had overdosed 18 years later and left Jake and his friends was mortified with it.

Mike had made Jake the kid's godfather . And that kid , was you . Now almost 18yr old teenager that had to stay with your dad's rockstar best friend Jake till you could fend for yourself because you literally did not have any other family.

Jake on the other hand had his whole family delighted to welcome you into the family .

☆⋆⋅─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ────⋆⋅☆

It was almost a year since your dad died and It had been a month since you moved in with Jake. He was never really the responsible type but you could tell he was trying.

You never understood why, but there was always an awkward when you were alone with him . A weird unspoken tension. You thought maybe it was because you didn't know Jake enough to feel comfortable living with him . But that wasn't true because you'd known Jake your whole life , he practically helped take care of you more than your own dad did.

Maybe he was just shy you thought , or uncomfortable?

Whatever it was , you couldn't spend more than 10 minutes alone in the same room with him without it getting weird .

You were thrown out of your thoughts when you felt a tap on you shoulder, making you startle before you turned to see Jake standing next to you .

"how many times did I tell you not to keep the volume basting? You're gonna go deaf love" Jake spoke as you slid your headphones down your head to rest around your neck .

"sorry-" you mutter as he walked past behind you .

"it's alright doll I just don't want you to get deaf so young" Jake spoke fast "Anyway, I'm making dinner so be down by 6 alright?" He said , shuffling in the kitchen .

"okay" you say before you slipped out of the kitchen and headed up stairs.

Why did you have to act like that ? Jake's a good person and you knew no matter what, he would never take advantage of you or anything of the sort . But you couldn't help how you acted. You wondered if he noticed your behaviour. You wondered if he was the only one that felt the weird tension.

You lay in bed , blasting music and scrolling through tiktok. And then you looked at the time and decided to go have a shower.

You turned on the Bluetooth speaker in your room and cranked the volume to max and went for your shower .

Jake rarely came upstairs , it was almost like he'd given it off to you with the guest bedroom and bathroom and a nice balcony. He had everything he needed downstairs anyway. His soundproof home studio, his bedroom , the dining, the kitchen , the living room and a nice porch outside all for him .

Even though no one had actually verbally divided the house like this , it just became a staple nom between the two of you .

You finished your shower, hot and steaming as you came out . It was your monthly everything shower and you had shaved everywhere and , done your skincare and hair masks and you really took your time with it.

You walked into your room , the music blasting as you stripped yourself of your towel and started dressing. You always had your room door locked so you didn't have to worry about Jake walking in (or so you thought).

"y|n-!" The door swung open and you screamed and grabbed whatever you could to cover your fully naked body.

Jake didn't even say anything he just spun around and slam the door back closed. So much in mearly a second .

You felt ashamed . This was only going to make things so much more awkward.

Meanwhile Jake was still in shock, he knew he shouldn't have barged in like that . But he had called out for you almost a hundred times before coming to upstairs and knocking on your door. But you couldn't hear him because you had your music blasting .

"fuck" he ran his fingers through his hair in frustration and guilt as he quickly went back downstairs.

You shut your music off for good , realising he must've called out for you and you couldn't hear him . You had completely forgotten about dinner at 6 .

You got dressed and took a few moments to gain the confidence to go back down and face him , ready to pretend nothing ever happened.

You walked into the kitchen and quickly grabbed something to eat before attempting to rush back upstairs but Jake stopped you .

"y|n we need to talk" he said , and you could swear you lost all feeling in your feet . Your throat went dry and your pulse fastened .

"come sit" he gestured for you to come and sit with him in the living room , his eyes on the tv .

You slowly crept up and sat yourself on the love chair next to the couch Jake was sitting on, picking at your food for a couples seconds of silence as Jake turned off the tv.

"look i-" he started, taking a deep breath to continue.

"I'm not going to pretend that I don't see you're uncomfortable with this whole thing anymore y|n" he starts .

"We haven't spoken about your dad or anything for that matter and I thought I wouldn't bring it up until you were ready but-" he sighed .

"We were so close before your dad died love, and I know this is all alot for you to process and take in and I only want to make it easier for you" he spoke as you felt tears prick your eyes.

"But I can't do that if you're not comfortable with with me. And it seemed to me like you're uncomfortable and I wouldn't blame you-" he continued.

"I kept calling out to you and I even banged on the door and I thought something had happened to you so I barged in- I shouldn't have- I didn't mean to-" you watched him as he spoke . He was terribly embarrassed, his face red with guilt. You felt sorry for him .

"no Jake it's alright really" you stop him and he left out a soft breath of relief to himself.

"No but if you're not comfortable staying with me . You could go stay with Josh or the others. My parents would be happy to have to too" Jake offered.

You stayed quiet , thinking it over .

What happened today was terribly awkward for the both of you. Considering the weird tension that you felt around him that drove you mad .

"my parents that is?" He smiled , knowing he had read your mind and you couldn't help but break out a smile too. He knew you better than you knew yourself.

You nodded and he mouthed a small 'okay' to himself before his eyes fell to your plate of food .

"you didn't take veggies" he exclaimed with playful anger and you laughed out a groan before getting up to serve yourself some veggies that Jake had made specifically for you .

It was weird how much tension eased once the two of you spoke about things. It was almost how it used to be when you dad was still around.

Jake was right. The both of you were very close and playful and he was your favourite uncle as a kid. Things just got different as you grew . And even worse after your dad died. The two of you had so much unspoken stuff that y'all had to talk about to go back how y'all used to be .

But for now , staying at Jake's parents house seemed needed .

Tags:

@jjwasneverhere @themoreyou-love @thetroublegetssoloud71 @gvf23 @sarah-gvf01

[irkimatsu]

I don't think I made a single OC during my time in Matsu fandom, but Hazbin's gotten my furry wheels spinning, god damn you. I'm gonna ramble under the cut to try to get my thoughts straight.

-Almaz (Nina Sinclair), squirrel, non-binary. An 80's one-hit-wonder who died in their 30's after self-destructing and overdosing on drugs, is in love with Husk. I've posted plenty about them before.

-Richard Brenning (hell name still undecided), white rabbit, died in his 50's, pansexual male. An 80's star like Almaz, but unlike Mazzie he got more than fifteen minutes of fame as a singer, reality star, and general tabloid menace. The "controversies and scandals" section of his Wikipedia page is longer than Mazzie's entire page. Absolutely covered in sparkles. I know his outfit includes a sparkly purple vest with nothing underneath, and I keep wanting to give him a hat, but Husk already has a top hat so I don't know what to do there just yet. An egotistical little shitheel at first, possibly an Overlord? Almaz looks up to him but he's a bit insensitive about the whole "one-hit-wonder who self-destructed, don't they all" thing. He'll chill out with some character development and eventually settle down with Angel Dust therefore freeing Husk for Almaz to pursue

-Clara? Originally made her to fill a request but I think I'm keeping her. Still need a last name for her, she keeps her birth name in hell. A small black bear, looks more like a teddy bear than a wild animal. Mainly dresses in floral print. Grew up with Alastor and knows he enjoys hunting, but is willfully ignoring the nastier aspects of her "big brother in spirit" in an attempt to preserve her happy childhood memories of him. Was born after Alastor but also died later than he did, in her 60's, I think? If that request stays canon to my OC's then she has a thing for Husk, but Husk is immediately bitter of her connection with Alastor, so that's not going anywhere. Still no idea what landed her in hell. Is "willful ignorance of the fact that your best friend is a serial killer" a sin?

And Husk's family, all of whom I still need to name:

-Husk's ex-wife was a black woman who lived in the middle of nowhere with nothing but her dreams. She moved to a rapidly growing Las Vegas in the 30's to chase those dreams, and started singing songs she wrote in the same bar where Husk would play saxophone with various bands. The two hit it off beautifully and had a wonderful marriage, with Husk spoiling her with gifts and trips and encouraging her singing and poetry... until everything fell apart because Husk just couldn't get his addictions under control, no matter how hard he tried. It's not his fault, exactly... it just sucks for everyone involved. Don't know what would have landed her in Hell, but I do want her to see Husk again so they can try to get some closure. ...and the pronoun use here is a bit strange because I think she'd realize she's transmasc while in hell? I want something where Husk's spouse thought they were a cishet woman in life, but due to Husk's own experience with the Las Vegas queer scene he always had his doubts about that... but he couldn't risk outing himself, so he never said anything while they were alive. They'll meet again, Husk will take their new gender identity in stride and finally get to come out to them as pansexual, maybe they'll try to rekindle their romance but the spark is fully dead on the spouse's side, Husk desperately needs this closure before he can pursue anyone else. He doesn't expect his spouse to forgive him, he just wants them to understand he never wanted to hurt his family...

-Husk's older daughters, twin girls. Still highly undeveloped, except that they stay close for their whole lives and Husk utterly spoiled them as much as he could while he was still able to see them. Husk has participated in princess teddy bear tea parties, I will die on that hill. They were preteens/early teens when their parents divorced, and a year or two after that their mother stopped letting Husk see them because he's a drunk deadbeat piece of shit. I'm so sorry, Husk. They started families of their own, Husk has grandkids, but he has no idea because his daughters never tried to re-establish contact with him in adulthood. They have their fond memories of him, but also some really shitty ones, especially after an event I'll be talking about in a moment. It's complicated.

-Husk's younger daughter, who I want to flesh out for one horrible reason... the idea of Husk losing his daughter in an accident, blaming himself for it for the rest of his life regardless of what he could have done to save her, and sinking further than ever into the addictions that would ruin his marriage in short order. I'm so sorry for doing this to you, everyone who's involved. She's in Heaven now, and if Husk ever ascends there will be tearful reunions god damn it please

I haven't decided on species for Husk's family, but none of them are cats; the cat thing is specific to him for his manner of life and death, figuratively drowning in alcohol before literally drowning in a lake. Cats hate water, after all. The others don't have that connection to cats. I'll figure them out eventually.

[tamiisnthere]

Asking because I am genuinely curious: how Tami and those three other kids came to be found by Talidea? Are they exist in same universe? And what happened with their parents?

I hope it's alright with me asking. I am curious 😅

It's okay! Thanks very much for ask! 💗

It's a long story, but I'll try to make it as short as possible. But I admit it probably will be a confusing mess. 😅

First, they all exist in the same universe, more specifically in my Crossover Universe. Tami, Emma, Takuya and Gavin lived together in an orphanage in one village before Talidea found them.

Regarding what happened to their parents and how they got to the orphanage:

The status of Tami's parents is unknown, as Tami was found as an infant by caregivers outside the entrance of the orphanage. She had a birth certificate with her, in which was written only her full name, date of birth and nationality. From the beginning, Tami was fascinated by animals, especially dinosaurs, and because of that, the orphans thought she was weird and boring.

Emma, as a three-year-old, came to the orphanage with her ten-year-old sister, who hated her because their mother died shortly after Emma's birth and blamed her for her death. Shortly after the arrival, the older sister dumped Emma and she was left alone. Fortunately, Tami came to her and asked her what happened. Emma told her everything, how her father tried to take care of her and her sister despite having cancer, which he later succumbed to and that's why they ended up in an orphanage. Tami got an idea if she could become her sister, to which Emma enthusiastically agreed.

Takuya arrived at the orphanage a few months later after Emma's arrival. His parents' status is unknown like Tami's, but he remembered how they had told him they were going on a short trip and would return to him soon... And since then, they have never returned… Takuya was found by his neighbor and put up for adoption. He tried to impress the other kids with his jokes and songs, but no one wanted to be friends with him... Except for Tami and Emma. They both had fun with him and played together that they decided Takuya would be their brother, which made him delighted.

And Gavin came to the orphanage a year later. He was taken away from his mother, who was an alcoholic and drug addict. Because of her abuse, Gavin became skittish that other kids mocked him and bullied him with scares. His only escape from reality was to observe the fish in the small aquarium that the orphanage owned. One day a bully scared Gavin so much that he started shaking with fear and crying. That's when Tami, Emma, and Takuya intervened, shooing the bully away and comforted Gavin. They decided that Gavin would be their brother too, and the four of them became inseparable. They were mainly brought together by their love of nature, animals and dinosaurs, of course.

But everything changed one evening when they heard from their caretakers that each of them would be transferred to a different orphanage, which horrified them. They decided to escape at night, which they succeeded. Four children went to the forest, where they got lost and did not know where to go. Luckily, at the time, Talidea was on a nighttime walk near her home and found them in the bushes. She asked them what they were doing out here so late and found out that they had run away from the orphanage so they wouldn't be separated. Talidea sympathized with them, because she too was an orphan and knew their suffering. She knew that she could not leave the four small children in the forest, nor did she allow herself to return them to the orphanage. So she decided that she would adopt them, even though she has her own two biological children and a niece. It was a great shock to Taino, Elphina and Talar that Talidea took the four human children into their family, but they decided to raise them as their own anyway. (here is the little comic I made three quarters of a year ago.)

And since then, Tami, Emma, Takuya and Gavin finally found a family and a home together. 💕🥰

(And also they got the nickname Hoodie Four later when they were older and started wearing hoodies more often at that time.)

[ellieellieoxenfree]

a thing that i genuinely fucking adore about kiseki and that i always have rotating rotisserie-style in my brain is how much trauma and abandonment informs the behaviors and beliefs of the core four. each of them was abandoned or hurt by a parental figure -- via death, via abuse, via addiction -- and the families and lives they built in the aftermath are informed by that specific pain. zong yi and chen yi are both very focused on their ambitions and staying the course and rushing into an accelerated adulthood while containing their emotions safely under wraps. but even then, zong yi is just focused on learning how to provide and be responsible because he has people who still unconditionally support and rely on him and he's thus able to be the most well-adjusted; chen yi doesn't know how to live a life without danger (to himself, to yiyun meng, to ai di) and has no real sense of safety or stability. he's always chasing that hero-worship model of adulthood because he doesn't know how to be his own style of leader and being the mirror image of chen dong yang is going to give him the closest approximation of a sense of safety. he relied on CDY growing up and he believes that mimicking his boss is going to soothe his own terror at living in a fundamentally unstable, out-of-control world.

ai di, of course, was born with emotional instability due to his mother's drug use, so he never had a chance. like chen yi, who was orphaned at an early age, he never had the sense of stability of even one loving caretaker, and CDY doesn't exactly give off the nurturing dad vibes. chen yi was forced into a caretaking role for a close-to-death feral little kid, and he had no one to model affection for him. he did the best he could, and he does succeed in being protection and safe haven for ai di, but he's never had a chance to process and navigate the emotional complexities of burgeoning adulthood and romance. (ai di is, in many ways, similar to macau from KP, i think -- starving for attention and affection that their broken older sibling figures can only give so much of. both vegas and chen yi try mightily to give them the chances they didn't get, but they were equally failed first.) so ai di has the advantage of having a slightly safer space to begin spreading out his messy emotions, but he doesn't know how to really express them in healthy ways (hence his self-destructive attention-seeking behavior).

ze rui is the outlier in many ways -- he doesn't fit in zong yi's world, but he doesn't fit in chen yi's and ai di's, either. as ai di points out to him, he still fears death. he's got his feet wet in the mafia world, but he doesn't have the commitment. he's not as trapped there. he can slide more seamlessly, if awkwardly, into the real world (such as at zong yi's school; he's clumsy and it's played for laughs, but he's old enough and poised enough to keep the ruse semi-on the rails, whereas ai di's prickly, itchy energy makes it a lot harder for him to easily ingratiate). he has somewhere to go home to, both literally in the sense of his apartment, and more figuratively, in the sense of his vile family unit that wants to use him as a pawn for the business. he's more or less kept on ice as a second-best option, told he can be trotted out when he's useful, but slapped down at any moment where he might dare to outshine his brother. of all the four, he's the one in the most gilded cage. zong yi is in a prison of poverty; chen yi and ai di are trapped in a cycle of violence and death. they contain themselves into their own self-created, pre-determined paths. zong yi has no choice but to go to med school and become a family provider. he knows he'll be a workhorse forever. chen yi and ai di have the blackly comic life of wondering if they'll even both be alive on their next birthdays, and they alternately chafe at that and welcome it. ze rui has a financially advantageous future, if he'll continue being a loyal pet of the same people who ruthlessly crushed the independence and ambition and self-esteem out of him from childhood on.

it's just such a crunchy show with so much to really dig into and pick apart at the marrow. i'm fascinated with how everyone starts at a similar point (parental failures) and spirals out in vastly different ways. sometimes they parallel each other, sometimes they intersect, and sometimes they diverge into wildly different paths. there are so many rich veins to mine (and that's not even touching a lot of the traumas inflicted in canon, for fuck's sake) and it's so refreshing to see a show about trauma and healing that doesn't manage to disrespectfully screw over its characters in the eleventh hour.

[errorthedumbone]

Michael Mitch is a bat family oc (find some stuff if you want to know on @erroritserror )

Rover is @ezzyraccoon 's. Idk why I made this-

Rover: "so how many bat-family is there?"

Micheal: "a lot. But I can name everyone for you"

Rover: "....ok..."

Micheal: "there is Alfred. He is the butler, the first to know who batman was and is the best cook you will ever meet."

Rover: "Terrance would be friends with him..."

Michael: "then there is Bruce Wayne. He is a rich billionaire that adopted me and my siblings. He is in public a rich play boy but at night he is a crime fighting vigilante. He didn't plan to have any kids but here we are. Anyways Bruce is a good guy....most of the time-"

Rover: "what do you me-"

Micheal: "THEN there is Dick Grayson! Raised in a circus, first robin, saw his parents die infront of him. Sad stuff. But kind and funny goof, probably the most traumatizing past not including me! He is now Nightwing and a big loving older brother!"

Rover "...well damn-..."

Micheal: "first batgirl aka Barbara Gordon was the daughter of a cop and she is in a wheelchair because joker broke into her house and shot her. So yeah- acts like a big sister to us. Bruce basically adopted her."

Micheal: "then Jason Todd. 2nd robin now a anti hero that is a huge foodie, me and tim are cool with him. His mom was a doctor that sold drugs and his dad was a small criminal that left to get the milk. Jason was also beaten by a crowbar to death by joker"

Rover: "do you all have trauma from clowns and circuses?"

Micheal: "yeah pretty much-"

Micheal: "Tim Drake was the 3nd robin, now red Robin...Yumm, he is smartest of us, lived a good ish childhood, his parents died- he is also is coffee addict and very sleep deprived. Don't ask the last time he slept!"

Rover: "should Bruce be-"

Micheal: "we all are sleep deprived Rov. Anyways there is Steph brown. Tim's ex, was the first female robin. Was second batgirl, smart gal, her dad tried to kill her many many many times, faked her death before, all that."

Rover: "im- do all of yo not have parents or have crappy parents?"

Micheal: "yep!"

Michael: "Cassandra Cain, 3nd batgirl, now is orphan (I think-) was trained without language so she doesn't talk much, she can read movements to tell what you are gonna do next. Doesnt understand everything but is badass!

Rover: "...wow-...im kind- wait is that all of the family?"

Micheal: "not even close. Anyway now their is Damian Wayne. The 4th robin, obsessed with animals, the only vegan, filled with rage pretty much, trained by the league of assassins. Mother is one of the leaders, Bruce's only biological child. And kinda a snappy kid but fun to hang with at times"

Rover: "sounds like tea and Elizabeth"

Micheal: "im not gonna ask who they are! Anyways Duke! Called The Signal, the first mutant in the family I think, the only bat person that has a good sleep schedule mostly because he works on the day. But very sweet and cheerful dude, also his mom is insane because of joker and he is trying to get her to at least remember who he is"

Rover: "their goes the joker trauma-... Holy shit your family is hu- wait what about bat woman?"

Micheal: "oh yeah she isn't important-"

Rover: "batwing?"

Micheal: "oh! He is another batman. Alfrican soldier that is another version of batman but he has a different kids suit, he is retired now but he i think had the most teched used suit then all of us"

Rover: "your family is huge, is there more?"

Micheal "yeah. Oh there is a lot!"

Rover: "cute..."

Correct me on any mistakes I made. I want to make sure I did all that right

Also the reason why I didn't do batwoman is because I dont know much about her-

This took me so fucking long-

[seancamerons]

What are some of your favorite headcanons about Sean?

dude you have no idea, so if you don't know, when i love a character I make up entire elaborate backstories and the rest under the cut/read more.😊

first we got -

sean is 1 of 3 brothers. when his veparents were hs seniors they had 9 months later a baby boy, his name was carson. they shortly married at their local church strong armed by family. so that's the oldest. they were estranged for a long time. he'd been incarcerated since he was 18, for drugs and petty theft but he went away bc his friend hit a guy drunk driving and was charged with 3rd degree vehicular manslaughter or something like bad, like a 6 year thing, the person died etc so he was in jail most of sean's forminative years. he screwed up and he paid for it and sean was without being bullied by his older brother and such. tracker was also but they don't like talk at all. at least sean and carson had good times even when he was terrorizing him and tracker. tracker never let it happen he'd protect sean from carson's moods, unpredictable and violence. im not sure how this story came about but it only deepened when i started getting into shows in the teen drama variety and remembering things from the show contextual clues and whatever. so three bros, jail, hardworker and all drop outs - but sean was supposed to be the boy to finally graduate and make everyone proud and get out of wasaga. that were his goals. he had all that but the graduation and instead enlisted but idk how that all went. i assume good. i can see it going a few was. i think sean is alive and doing well. he works, till works out still handsome maybe has facial hair.

so more specificly - sean is the baby of his family. the bonus child, sad. totally a whoops, but still loved and maybe even coddled more the parents know they've been neglectful but he's loved and considered and has friends doing good, but maybe not as than perhaps the oldest carson who was when they were teens themselves and didn't know what they were doing, tracker who came later who at first were fine but their addictions to alcohol at home started later and sean bore the brunt and saw their parents at their absolute worse. totally a shitshow. by then carson was fucked up and incarcerated, his parents still doted as he was their oldest son and they kind of were young and should've never been that out of control but he got a rough hand and i kind of base that like how ryan atwood from the oc had this brother who was in jail the reason he even was in newport in so many ways but by then ryan had changed and trey i assume - similar to carson. this makes tracker the older, a bit wiser, less in trouble, family duty kind of good guy who tries his best but maybe is also cursed with the cameron destructo genes but also made it a good life for himself, helps his young brother after his brush with violence and such and put him out of harms way, at his mom's request to him. i don't think this was selfish NOW WE CHILDFREE WE CAN DRINK ALL THE TIME. no i don't think they wanted to drink, i think their body craved it so bad they NEEDED to drink but they ost the 'fun' of being buzzed or blitzed and rather needed it to stop feeling pain and numb, self medicate even if it's bad for them and the reason for 90 percent of their misfortunates like it or not. realistic, bleak and fucking dark. i also set some of my stories up to where they're adults dealing with this stuff because like it or not this fandom has a lot of adults and im sure they don't want a fluff fest where people are all honky dorey. i hate perfect people, so all my girls and guys are flawed but some people are super good people but live and exist in bad times or bad situations like 90 percent of people out here like it or not.

so for example in the story (backtrack) carson plays more of a active role in from his start, he wants to do better and change like trey atwood did after everything with getting released but then he started bad habits and hanging out with that girl and coming onto Marissa who just wanted to be nice and help him out, but he actually commits to it and finds happiness and becomes close with sean over a time. as kids he was tormenting him and calling him what he assumed a mistake and it explains how sean is because he's very mean to himself. he bullies himself or makes himself feel bad when good things are happening. anway carson based on sean. tracker is named after the father but like leave it to beaver - baby sean couldn't say scott but loved calling him tracker because of his tractor pajamas or his love of vechiles and his name kind of stuck. even now it's tracker, scott is their dad. tracker is tracker, sean's middle name in his backstory had been hope. so sean hope, i assume his mother watched soaps and watched ryan's hope or something (it used to be on soapnet i swear its related!) it's older than old but it's an older show about a young Irish family who settled in the Americas but in the present so they've got these thick Irish accent and they own a pub or at least someone does when they immigrated and all congretate and drama ensued.

i just wanted to sidebar this and say i did watch a lot of soaps as a kid, perhaps that's why i love making up stories. i used to do with my barbies too. when my mom would watch court tv for like OJ Simpson i'd be playing with my dolls and creating plots for them like it was days of our lives or all my children in my barbie dream house. i was kind of made to do that stuff. even with the grusome details and gory things i heard or didn't 'get', it was weird juxtaposition of adult shit and adult shit i assume is romantic adult shit. this is no different.

i watched days and all my children (my mom preferred amc)

i also used to watch springer and maury in the summer or when i was ill! so like the drama is still seared there, i mean with mary from paterinity or bad kids BootCamp kind of episodes, there was the maury drama stuff. also the weird competition reality shows like rock of love and flavor of love or the reformed ladies of both of these shows would be on the charm school and such and then Megan wanted a billionaire and got a murderer and the whole shebang fell apart. now vh1 plays trash. I'm obsessed with the 1980s thanks to that channel i love times like that you know, when i wasn't alive but would've loved to live at that time/place.

okay end rant.

so that's just one big large explanation. in short i can go on forever. is shared a lot of headcanons but that's one. ask if you want to hear some more. this is a bit weird bc i shouldn't think this deeply about the fictional but hey.

okay fine, you caught me in a good mood, and i think you're awesome - one more headcanon for sean:

the tattoo is real. jay's too.

i love platonic as well as romantic friendships or love between close friends, but in a strictly platonic way and of course romance in every sense but the point is, you can be soulmates in a friend kind of way. i believe that's true for jalex. they were best friends i think. the show establishes them as young kids, in love or affectionate, but also had history for a long time and maybe there's a lot we do not know about their lives pre show or after. do they talk? 100 percent.

so jay and sean got tatted. sean has a lot of friends in wasaga (in degrassi he has none) so when he first came back to degrassi and had all these friends, one big bad bully tyler (the guy who got him back over to) and of course you knew what comes next.

one of sean's friends is like a tat apprentiece. she's new and she wanted to ink a friend. sean trusts her judgment and he agreed, jay and him had a "if you do it, I'll do it" when asked what they wanted they were told, "Make sure you love it and have no regrets because it's perminant." by this time in his life this is between season 4 and season 6 a lot had happened but over that time sean had realized he cares about emma way more than a friend and she had like it or not moved on but at this time he had no idea about that. jay was instrumental but didn't tell at that time. he'd visit him and give him the low down. so the friend who is an artist apprentice who needs to practice took it, and she's still got to get used to skin as opposed to lettering and details so it looks mighty rough. but they both said out loud from their room one guy was on one side, and the other guy was in the other chair.

"emma" sean quietly answers. "spelled e m m a"

"alex" jay announced. "self explanitory."

sean's friend her name is sabrina, often called brina or bree asks them as she's working on the lettering and they're sitting tight in the office. jay actually doesn't tease sean about emma or getting inked. by this time ellie hadn't been a blip on the radar, but emma had been on his mind. she was the first face he saw as she drove away, and the first face he wanted to see if and when he comes back to town.

they talk abiout the girls in their lives. by this point jay had alex had been split up and he more than anything wanted to be like before, before when they were everything to each other. he didn't want to forget her. he didn't want to not be her friend, and he fucked up their relationship and this was his way of memorializing their relationship.

for emma she was close to his heart, hence the chest as the location of this tattoo and he truthfully feels like connected even if they're apart.

long story short, the tats were a secret. emma unless they bumped uglies probably never found out about the tat, unless they had the kind of secs where he wasn't shirtless but it's sean cameron of fucking course she's gonna have no shirt in that (sorry just a headcanon) i mean there was a reason he was often at home dressed like in wifebeaters or shirtless playing sports with the guys) im sure at home he dresses in as little as he can so shorts/tank top no hodies unless its cold and he works out frequently in his non heated/non ac or hot apt. im sure air is expensive fans are expensive and water is expensive so he's living in the now for sure but once he returned back to 'get the diploma;, he justified setting his eyes and heart onto emma. i do believe he had goals, but he truly more than anything missed emma.

say what you will but his heart is often found in the right place. he might have flaws, but he is deep down a wonderful guy with a sad life. six was a disservice to him and his legacy for being a little bit mushy in the inside heart of gold, hero complex but also a great guy to have in your corner. that's him.

so when he said (paraphrasing this) he didn't want to come back for all the things he'd said, what he really wanted was love from her. he loved her and he also hurt her. sometimes he hurt the people he loved, or who loved him, and felt bad later because in the heart of the moment with his words he burned all those bridges. such as when he stole from Simpson. i don't know if emma was ever proven right to her face, she sounds like assuming without knowing but assuming that something was said. he says to her, he pretty much came back to be around her again.

i do believe the scene in the basement in the 2nd part of "here comes your man" clearly he wanted to confess a little bit about that but she kind of set the boundary she can't care about it because

1. she's got peter/he needs her even if they'd had a lot of build up and yet she can't be her real self.

2. manny clearly has something against sean over peter (what even was that?) i wouldn't be nice to him either tbh.

3. i don't think she doesn't care, it's that it's hard for her to imagine that because she'd been burned in the past not just by him, but his departure, or indirectly through hurled insults and other things throughout her life experience/lived experience attending degrassi!

4. a secret option idk combination of 2/5

5. all the above!

either way this kind of breaks sean's heart (teeny bit) and she begs him to turn himself in, or suggests this is the only way but that was a sad thing. he got hauled off and shit and peter got what? slap on the wrist - why did the writers love him? he sucks. peter got away with too much.

the worst thing sean did wouldn't equate peter's worse - like what he did to manny? inexcusable. what a bad guy. why was manny defending him, and i don't wanna hear the obvious, "oh he stood by your side during your eating disorder!"

no, i aint buying they're doing the sexy shit either. so seeing sean, who i believe she was attracted to him beyond looks but they sure didn't make it a issue because he had the package - handsome and such, but also messing up a bit bc the street races were illegal and what they were doing was no question illegal and morally grey.

also why tf jay sabotogue sean like that and tell him to run? when is any vechiular thing warrant them to idk. but he did and stuff and we all know it was nothing. either he didn't know that running from the scene as his friend told him to do bc that there is a hit and run OR jay wanted to cause sean grief for some weird reason or things just went down and he panicked and didn't want sean to go to jail, and thought it'd be better if he ran but still. so i gave you a bunch of things to sort through.

💐💌ty for the message!

[sanctuarymade]

LEO AND THEO WALSH :  A STUDY IN CODEPENDENCY .

content warnings for:  drug use, child abuse, codependency, limb loss.

leo and theo have been inseparable from birth.  born only twenty minutes apart, completely identical, and each absolutely inconsolable in the absence of the other, they gave their parents a run for their money even as infants. they always had to be together, even if their needs didn’t completely line up  (which led to an interesting color coding system in the walsh household, where leo was always dressed in red and theo in blue, for leah’s fear that exhaustion would lead to the two getting mixed up, even if she could tell her babies apart from day one).  they even shared a crib.

growing up, their attachment to each other only grew, even as their personalities distinguished themselves, with leo far more laid back than his anxious brother. they shared toys, shared a room in their small childhood apartment, and even no matter how often leah got after them for it, theo would crawl into leo’s bed in the middle of the night through most of their childhoods. as they got older, their father died, their mother remarried, and the abuse started, this attachment only grew, with leo molding himself into his brother’s protector.

when sean’s abuse turned to the boys, leo would go to great pains to keep the attention focused on him, goading their stepfather and providing opportunities for theo to run and hide. this continued until their teen years. 

when leo got a job at a local gym, theo accompanied him to work, helping out even if he himself wasn’t officially employed, which was where they got the idea to take boxing classes with the plan of finally defending themselves and their mother from sean. 

shortly after they started high school, theo began experimenting with drugs. it started innocent enough, mostly just cigarettes and pot, but as sean grew more violent to prove a point as the boys hit their growth spurts, his escapism grew more desperate and he began to experiment with harder stuff, which led him to be more confrontational with sean, creating a vicious cycle despite leo’s constant attempts to interrupt it. when one day leo returned home to find his brother beaten almost beyond recognition, he snapped, turning on sean and retaliating with full strength, nearly killing the man in his rage and officially running him off. 

despite the absence of their abuser, theo’s substance abuse issues only escalated, culminating in an incident in which he stole leo’s insulin needles, nearly sending him into ketoacidosis. in a fit of rage, leah made to throw theo out of the house, to which leo came to his brother’s defense, blaming his mother for allowing sean into their lives in the first place, and the two left home together, picking up odd jobs and both joining an underground boxing league for cash. theo’s drug use continued, with leo unwilling to confront it or issue an ultimatum. 

from there, their reliance on each other grew only more unhealthy, as theo’s addiction grew worse and worse and leo’s enabling behavior did little to help. the two made a good career in boxing, and though leo was offered a professional contract about half a dozen times, he refused to take them, unwilling to leave his brother behind, for fear he’d spiral or do something otherwise harmful to himself in order to ‘keep up’. 

for years, theo’s addiction ruled leo’s life. being his brother’s caretaker and protector was the biggest part of leo’s identity. he lost jobs, friends, countless opportunities, primarily because he placed caring for his brother and making sure theo knew he was loved above all else. this came to a head in 2013 when theo, under the influence, crashed the car he was driving with leo in the passenger seat. infections and further complications resulted in leo’s left leg being amputated below the knee, and the results of theo’s drug test landed him in court mandated rehab. 

while in therapy to deal with the loss of his limb and potential career, leo was diagnosed with ptsd from his childhood, and put the word ‘codependent’ on his and theo’s relationship for the first time. he learned the difference between support and enabling, and that unconditional love and healthy boundaries were not mutually exclusive. it was a slow process, one that even cost him an engagement, but he began to slowly put up healthy walls, which theo challenged heavily at first, and their relationship, while still loving, was tense for years until his brother began actively seeking to turn his life around. 

they’re still not completely there, and can occasionally fluctuate between periods of codependency followed by periods of distance and coldness, but they’re getting there.

[briamichellewrites]

75

No matter what, Mike would always be Bria’s best friend. Joe knew that. She would always go to him first, out of everyone. He got it because Mike was the kind of guy who knew how to handle almost any situation. During his date with Bria, he learned about her family situation. He hadn’t paid particular attention to her before when she talked about her parents. Now, he was. The guy she thought was her father was her biological grandfather.

She was told he had done horrible things to her. He recorded himself sexually abusing her and he gave her drugs to keep her calm. The abuse was discovered when she became pregnant at sixteen. By that point, she had developed a heroin addiction and had to go into rehab for nine months. She was lucky to be born without drugs in her system.

It was a year ago that she found out her grandfather wasn’t her biological father. Who was it? His name was Curtis Roche and he was a billionaire. He left half his money to her before he died from heart problems. She didn’t even know he existed. What about her mother? She died from a heroin overdose a couple of years after she was born. A homeless man found her body in downtown LA and called the police. She disappeared after surrendering her after birth.

Bria was a heroin addict, even though she never used heroin. Her therapist told her she had second-generation trauma from what her mother went through. Her grandfather was in prison, the last she knew. Was that why she got along well with Chester? Maybe. They both had trauma, so they might have latched onto each other because of that.

Chester was also one of the craziest fucking people she ever met! He laughed. That was very true.

“I told Mike that in the event of a zombie apocalypse, he and I would be going after the zombies with submachine guns and weapons like flamethrowers and fucking grenade launchers. We thought you would be the only person crazy enough to join us.”

“Fuck yeah! I would run over them in a tank!”

Joe is officially joining Chessy and me on our zombie-killing mission. He’s going to be running over zombies in a tank. – Bria

Mike asked Joe about the tank the following day while waiting for the other guys to arrive at the studio. He grinned. How else would he destroy the zombies? Where would he get the tank? He had his ways. That was something he didn’t want to know about. What he was curious about was why he was hanging out with Bria again. She invited him over and he decided to stay for the weekend.

“Joe, congratulations!”

“Thank you. We’re not officially dating yet but…”, he shrugged.

“Still, that’s fucking awesome!”

They did play with the cats. They were very much like human siblings with Slash being the annoying little brother. Mike laughed. Joe had two older sisters, so he knew what it was like to be the little brother. He thought the weekend had gone well. Not once did he think about his video games because he was too busy with Bria and her cats. They were curious about him. When he sat on the floor, they used his lap to hide from each other.

Bria liked picking them up and telling them she loved them. It was adorable. Mike used the weekend to catch up on errands and housework. Misty was afraid of the vacuum, so she climbed up to the couch with her favorite toy. Yes, she was used to it. She just didn’t like the scary sound it made. Mike thought it was funny, though he petted her when it was over.

He also texted back and forth with Brad. Since he was busy, he responded when he had a chance. During one of their dates, Mike opened up to him about being cheated on by an ex-girlfriend. He found out she was cheating when she told him she was pregnant. She was unsure of who the father was at the time. He had to wait nine months before he learned the baby wasn’t his. It took him a long time before he could date anyone again because he had trust issues.

Brad had sympathy and compassion for him. Getting cheated on sucked. Did he still have trust issues? A little, but it was something he was working on. He wanted to go into a relationship thinking that his partner had good intentions without being jaded. Brad thanked him for telling him about his ex-girlfriend. He would be open and transparent with him. Thank you.

“Bria, you made it out of your teens without getting pregnant.”

The band laughed, as she looked like she wanted to strangle Phoenix. Asshole! He side-hugged her and told her he loved her. She loved him too. As a gay man, he would never be sexually interested in her. That meant he could pick on her like she was his little sister. How was her new career as a stay-at-home cat mom? It was fucking awesome!

Even when they woke her up at seven in the morning to be fed. It was like they collectively decided that seven was a great time to meow incessantly until she got up. Good thing they were both adorable kittens, though. Chester told her to wait until she had a newborn baby. They would wake her up in the middle of the night to be fed. She was way too young to have kids. If she did have kids, she wanted to be at least twenty-five or thirty years old.

“If I ever meet your next boyfriend, I’m going to tell him you’re a dick”, she told Phoenix.

He laughed. With the stress of taking care of his mother, it felt good to joke around and laugh. He was going to drive home again on Friday to visit his parents. They wanted him to find a guy to settle down with. He wasn’t interested in dating, especially since he just broke up with Mike. But if he met a guy worth taking a chance on, he wasn’t going to rule him out.

The band was relieved that he and Mike had an amicable breakup. They were mature enough to move past it and work together. They will always be an important part of their lives. After finishing the day, Joe was going home. His video games weren’t going to play themselves. He could almost hear them crying out his name. Joe! Come play us, Joe! He heard Bria mention splurging at Saks Fifth Avenue. Mike wanted to go with, so she invited him to join her.

They could even get dinner together. He was all for that! The band all said goodbye to each other before leaving. Phoenix asked Joe what he was going to do for the rest of the day. Video games. He laughed. Of course! Why didn’t he think of that? Mike was excited about going shopping for new shoes and clothes! He got into the passenger side of Bria’s car and got his phone out.

Haha, Bria will have to tell me about her zombie apocalypse idea when I’m back home. I miss you. I’ll be back soon. – Brad

@zoeykaytesmom @feelingsofaithless @alina-dixon @fiickle-nia

[g0kotta]

Ride or die

Platonic!Haitani brothers x gn!reader, slight Sanzu x reader. Izana, Kakucho and Mikey are mentioned. This is around 3k words

“What happens if one of us dies?”

“If I’m being honest. I think if one of us dies the other two would follow.”

“Right to the grave?”

“Yeah.”

PLEASEEE READ THE WARNINGS: drugs, guns, death, angst no comfort, no happy ending, addiction to drugs, overdose, curse words, slightly sexual themes? Like mentioned one time I think. This is just rough. I’m not too happy with how this was written but it has a lot of dark and heavy themes. Mentions of religion, atheism. Mental health problems. Mentions of abuse from family members. Mentions of suicide. Parts with the italic font are memories from the past.

“Growing up poor was shit. The ‘money doesn’t buy happiness’ was also a shit joke that probably a middle class person came up with. Maybe they were even rich? Because surely a poor person would never say something that dumb. What could be even shittier you might ask? Growing up with two drug addicts that always forgot they even had a kid.” Your fingers tap on the metal table in front of you. “For a couple of years I grew up completely alone. At the age of four I already knew how to cook myself something I could call meal and knew how to take care of myself. I thought that I didn’t need anyone else and I could be fine with being alone. But it got.. lonely after a while I guess.” A pen clicking and then touching a paper sounded way louder than it usually did. Probably because the room was nearly empty. And cold. It was very cold. It reminded you of a place you once called home.

“When did you meet the Haitani brothers?” The woman sitting in front of you pushes her glasses up and clicks her pen a few times. You smile slightly and lean your head back.

“I was six. We met in a playground. I ran away from home, because my parents went batshit crazy and started throwing plates at me. It was nothing new, but still. I always felt safer when I left that house. So I ran out every time something bad happened and came back when I knew that they would be asleep.”

Crocodile tears were running down your face, while you were running away from your parents. Your small palms reached your cheeks as you tried to wipe them off. And as you finally reached the safest place you knew of, you fell flat on your but and then laid down on the grass. The sky seemed so peaceful. Clouds looked like boats, sailing around the blue waters of the sky. And as you took in the beauty of your surroundings, you didn’t notice the two boys coming up to you, until they laid down next to you. One on each side.

“Hey. You okay?” One of them asks and you quickly snap your head to the side, your eyes meeting his.

“Yeah. Fine.”

“Doesn’t look like it.” The other boy states as they both stare at you. “I’m Rindou. And that’s my older brother Ran.”

“I’m Y/N.”

“Hm.” The woman hums and keeps on writing. “You know I’m trying to help you right? I need to give you as much information as possible. Otherwise you know what’s waiting for you.” She sniffles and straightens her posture, trying to look as professional as possible. “You all did horrible crimes. But before talking about that, I need to know about how it all lead up to that. Maybe you have any mental illnesses you don’t know of yourself. So tell me everything. Every little detail you can remember.”

“What if I don’t remember much?” You stare right at her, making her uncomfortable.

“Tell me what you remember, (L/N) (Y/N).”

“Hold my hand c’mon, (Y/N)!” Rindou yells and you grab onto his extended hand. “Move your fucking ass faster! They’re right behind us.” The both of you take quick turns, trying to mislead the cops. Growing up in Roppongi meant that the three of you knew the streets quite well. It seemed like you had it all mapped out in your head. So it wasn’t like it was too hard to run away. But in this moment it was, since you got shot in the leg.

“I can’t, Rin. Shit I can’t feel my fucking leg, how do you want me to fucking run?!” You yell right back at him and suddenly he lifts you up and throws you onto his shoulder, mumbling “c’mon, c’mon please” under his breath. A car stops right in front of you and Rindou thanks whatever gods that Ran wasn’t high out of his mind and actually came to help the both of you out. He opened the door and laid you down onto the backseat before hopping into the car himself.

“They’re bleeding.” Rindou shouts at Ran and Ran’s knuckles turn white as he grabs even harder onto the steering wheel.

“They’ll be fine.” He tries to convince himself and his younger brother at the same time. “We just need to reach Izana. He’ll help us out.”

“Stop.” The woman interrupts you. “Who is the Izana you’re speaking of?”

“He was a well known delinquent that led his own ‘kingdom’ as he liked to call it. It was a gang full of strong delinquents that took over Tokyo fast.” You smile, remembering the white haired short man. He always held a sweet spot in your heart with his scarred friend Kakucho.

“When was the last time you spoke to him?”

“Five years ago.”

“Why did the two of you stop talking to each other?” The psychiatrist asks while writing down the information that you told her. “You were smiling while talking about him. That means you cared, or maybe even still care about him. So why haven’t you spoken in such a long time. Of course, besides the fact that you’ve been in prison for a year.”

“He died.” She was shocked with your answer, but quickly cleared her throat and resumed to her stoic facial expression.

“Who killed him?”

“Some random dude I’ve never heard of.”

“Did he help you then. With your leg?”

“Yes. He had a medic on his team, that dropped out of med school. But he had good knowledge of what he was doing.”

Ran grabs the small bag that contained white powder from your hands and poured it onto the table. “If we continue on with this.. We’re gonna be rich!” He smirks as he looks down at the backpack laying on the cold cement floor of the basement. The bag was full of all kinds of drugs. Half of them you were hearing about for the first time. You didn’t know how Ran got ahold of them, but you didn’t care. The pill you took twenty minutes ago was doing wonders and you didn’t want to think of anything else. You all could enjoy yourselves with the drugs you owned and get money from selling them. Could it get any better than that?

“Man.” Rindou stretches as he was sitting on the ground in an uncomfortable position for a while now. “I don’t know what I took, but fuck did it make me not only high, but also horny as hell.” He groans. “I could really go get my dick wet right now.” You and Ran laugh at Rin’s statement and you lean your head backwards, staring into the ceiling which was full of cracks and ugly posters that only God himself knew where Rindou got them from. You grimace as you take in the naked women in some of them. They looked worn out.

“What if someone came on one of the posters here and now it’s on our ceiling.” You ask and both of the brothers look at you confused and grossed out.

“Man your high thoughts are fucking wack.”

“So that’s where it all started?”

“Yeah.” You lick your lips. “We took a bite out of the forbidden apple and enjoyed ourselves way too much. This was the first time we got so much cash. So we thought that this was the most perfect idea ever. Selling and doing drugs, and also getting so much cash? Fucking amazing, right? That’s how it felt at that moment. But I should’ve known.. I saw how my parents turned out. I know I should’ve stopped them at that moment. But it all felt so.. right.” You sigh. “I never cared about myself. I could’ve ended up in a ditch dead. I didn’t care. But I cared about them. I cared about them so fucking deeply, y’know? They were my first actual family. And I felt happy with them. I actually felt fulfilled with joy. I smiled whenever I was with them, I laughed, I felt at home. At peace. Thought at night time, I prayed.”

“Why?” The woman whispered. Without even noticing she fell deep into your story. Never really heard anything like that before probably. She looked young. If you had to guess, she probably just finished university and this was her first serious job.

“I was scared. I don’t even remember if I actually believed in God. But I begged Lord to forgive the Haitani’s and I for our sins. We did what we had to do to survive. And I hope Lord knows that. I.. I don’t know what awaits after death. But I can tell you that I fear it. I fear the unknown.” You look at the floor of the small room. It really reminded you of the basement that everything happened in. “I stopped praying after a while. Maybe a year after we started doing what we did. I thought that no matter what, no matter how much I begged and prayed it wouldn’t help anymore. We were in too deep.”

“How many people did you think you killed at that point?”

“After the first year? Hm..” your fingers tapped on the table once again, as you were deep in thought. “I think I killed around two people. But combined with the brothers.. There were around nine victims. The drugs messed with our brains. And we.. I don’t think we fully understood what was going on. At least I didn’t. It all felt like a dream, or… or a movie.”

“How did you feel when you killed your first victim?” Her fingers were shaking slightly, showing that she was nervous.

“I.. I felt scared. But I had to do it. Otherwise that would’ve been Ran. The guy pushed his gun right in the middle of Ran’s forehead. So I grabbed the metal pipe that was laying next to me and hit as many times as I had to.”

“Uhm. I have to tell you this, (L/N). But your parents want to come to court next week. To see you and hear what sentence you’ll get. Do you want me to tell them anything? Do you have a message?”

“Tell them that they can go fuck themselves.”

Different colours of dim lights were flashing around in some jocks trashy house. There were empty bottles of disgusting and cheap beer, vodka, champagne. There were also all kinds of different substances on the ground and you tried to not step on any of it. Fuck knows what the hell even was all of that. People were making out, grinding on each other, some were even actually having sex not caring about all of the people around them. Some remix of a random song you have never even heard of was blasting throughout the whole house. You take a look around and finally spot who you were looking for. With a smirk you plop down on the couch in the middle of both brothers. Trying not cringe at the thought of what happened on this couch before all of you showed up. Rindou was smoking a joint while Ran had white powder around his nose. You let out a sigh and grab a baggie of pills from the bag laying on the ground near Ran’s feet. You take the two pills without caring what kind they were and put them in your mouth, below the tongue, waiting for them to melt. “It’s ecstasy.” Rindou whispers into your ear and you just nod, too lost in your thoughts to answer. Suddenly a boost of confidence hits you and you felt so close to the pair sitting next to you. Closer then ever before. A feeling of happiness and relaxation took over your body and you started to feel free. Smiling to yourself, you look at Ran and Rindou, and close your eyes for a while.

It felt so, so peaceful. For once in your life you felt okay.

“So that was the start of your addiction to ecstasy?”

“Yeah. And also all kinds of other drugs.” You nod and take a look at her name tag. Dr. Fudo. “It felt nice to forget about everything happening. It was almost.. euphoric I guess. The drugs made me feel free. And it messed with my memory. So it made me feel like this was the only appropriate escape from the horrors happening around me.”

“So you were high most of the time all of this was happening?”

“Yup. Also almost overdosed a couple of times though. Ran just found me at the right time and saved my life I guess.” You look to the side and stare at the ugly walls. “I beat myself up for it every day. The both of them saved me so many times without even knowing, but I couldn’t save them.”

“Were you in a romantic relationship with either Haitani Ran, or Haitani Rindou?” She puts down her pen on the table and crosses her arms on her chest, leaning backwards until her back hits the chair.

“No.”

“Were you in a romantic relationship with anyone during this timeline?”

“Yes.”

“What was his name?”

“He called himself Sanzu.”

“What happened to him?” Fudo grabbed the pen once again and put it near the paper laying on the table.

“He overdosed.”

“Dude, shut the fuck up.” You laugh and hit Haru in the chest while laughing. The world seem quiet. The only two sound you heard were the voices of you and Sanzu Haruchiyo. You had met him on accident. He was buying drugs from Rindou and you walked in on them. The three of you talked for a while, before Rindou had to leave to sell some more drugs which left just the two of you. You hit it off easily and it just felt right. If anyone had to guess they would’ve thought that you and Sanzu were best friends and not some strangers that only met like fifteen minutes ago. Sanzu called it fate. Said you were his soulmate.

“Nah, I’m saying the truth.” He giggled and kissed the top of your head. “The fucker pissed his pants and was just laying on top of the couch, talking to his crush like nothing happened.” Sanzu took a hit from the joint between his lips.

You laugh even harder. And push your back against Sanzu’s chest, trying to get into a more comfortable position. The both of you were on top of some random building, popping all kinds of pills and getting high together, making out, talking about your life stories. The Haitani brothers made you feel at home. They were your family. Sanzu on the other hand made you feel good in other ways. He never judged you for anything and always beat up the people who just looked at you weird. He fit well into your group and the brothers took him in with open arms. Sanzu was now a part of your little family.

“I love you, (Y/N). I hope you know that.” Sanzu leans down and touches your lips with his.

“How did his death make you feel?”

“I wanted to kill myself. Almost tried. But the brothers mattered to me too much, I couldn’t leave them. So I just started doing even more drugs. I tried to forget about him, but he just haunted me no matter what I did. He still haunts me in my dreams sometimes even after three years.”

“The cops found three of the bodies.” Rindou punches the wall and lets out a series of curses. Ran was pulling his hair and keeping his head low, trying to think of anything.

“Let’s just run away.” You quickly butt in. “Let’s grab our shit and leave. Mikey said he has a place for us, right? He wanted us to join him so let’s just fucking go.”

“They’re right.” Ran stands up. “Let’s pack our shit and go as soon as possible.”

But before you could even do much the door of your apartment was kicked down and yelling could be heard. You duck and hide behind the table of your kitchen.

“I don’t remember much of that day. Maybe because I was high. Or maybe it was the adrenaline and fear I felt. I just remember screams. I remember Rindou getting shot first because he tried to shoot a police officer. Then I heard Ran cry. I think it was the first time ever I saw Ran cry. It was terrifying. I..” you take a deep and shaky breath. “I’ll never forget the scream he let out. Rindou meant the world to him. I don’t know why Ran got shot. They never told me.”

“He grabbed the gun laying and the floor and also tried to shoot.”

“Oh.”

Cameras were flashing everywhere as you were being led out of court. Yells of different paparazzi could be heard even inside the building.

“(L/N) (F/N) is it true that you got a death penalty for all of the crimes you, Ran Haitani and Rindou Haitani committed?”

You just smile and keep on walking.

“What happens if one of us dies?” Y/N tilts their head to the side slightly and looks at Ran, laying right next to them. It was a chilly autumn day, the park they were at was empty - people were getting ready for the upcoming cold days, working to make sure that they and their families would stay safe and warm.

“I don’t think anyone would mourn any of us. We’re nothing to everyone else. Only a burden.” Ran smirks as if this didn’t cause a pang in his chest. If he could, he would do everything differently. He would make sure that his brother and you had different lives. He just wanted you two to be happy. To make actual good memories instead of whatever this was. He hopes that in another life all of you can be happy together.

“I would mourn you. I hope you’d mourn me too.” You let out a sigh and grab his hand with yours.

“If I’m being honest. I think if one of us dies the other two would follow.”

“Right to the grave?”

“Yeah. Right to the grave.”

[sanzusbestie]

Bonten where they had a little sister who went missing at the age of 14-15 and years later they have another meeting with another criminal organisation only to find out that she was the leader but she is corrupt like bonten mikey but worser.and ofc she has an executive like an exact copycats like bonten,they had a drug addict and a phsychopath who is extremely loyal to her.A dou siblings who is the same like haitani brothers .and an older excecutive like takeomi and mochi.And ofc she also had an exececutive like kokonoi.Her excecutive is extremely loyal to her and will do anything she says.

(This is a hc and can you do this saperetelyʕ•ᴥ•ʔ).

♡ We meet again ♡ part 1/part 2 V1/V2/V3

Characters : Bonten men and fem!reader as their sister

Warnings : Angst ?

A/n : I'm sorry I didn't write for Mochi, we practically have nothing on him so it was kinda hard. I'm not gonna lie at first I had no idea of what to write, but now I kinda like how it turned out. I hope you'll like it too ! Thank you for requesting and have a nice day ♡

Manjiro will never forget the day you disappeared

It was right after Shinichiro's death after all

Fortunately, he still had Emma at that time, he would've lost it long ago if not

He spent a lot of time trying to find you, in vain

But never in his life he would've thought you were a gang leader during all this time

"Tell me Manjiro, surprised aren't you ?"

"Hey ! Who the fuck do you think you are calling him by hi-"

At the same time your eyes landed on the pink head, your most loyal executive already had his gun out, aiming at Sanzu's head

"You shut the hell up when she talks."

Manjiro stayed enough time with Sanzu to recognize the eyes of a drug addict

Looking around, he saw your 5 other executives

He didn't know what they were like but seeing the one that just defended you, he wouldn't be surprised if they were like his

"Why did you leave without saying anything" he asked looking back at you

"Because we're different, dear brother. I don't just forgive and forget."

Your thirst for justice became a thirst for revenge.

"Y/n ! I can't believe you're alive !"

He had the audacity to smile as he saw you

Kakucho started jogging to you, only to be stopped in his tracks by three of your executives, you didn't even have to a say a word

"One more step and they'll kill you."

He smile instantly disappeared

"I'm surprised you recognized my face."

"What are you saying ? Of course I do, you're my sister !"

Never in his life we was met with a look of disappointment that heavy

"Am I ?"

"Wha-"

"Was I your sister when you were kneeling before Izana ? Was I your sister when you left to serve him ? Was I your sister when you left me alone right after our parents died ?!"

You were yelling at this point and he couldn't say anything

You were right

"Don't ever try to come near me again. Now, Bonten, let's start this meeting, shall we ?"

"Long time no see."

"What the fuck Y/n ?!" they shouted simultaneously

That's the Haitani brothers for you

"What ? Don't even start being mad or whatever because I have my own organisation now. You spent your life ruling over Rippongi."

They were utterly shocked

They always cared about you, for them family was everything

"I admired you guys, I wanted to be like you. But you wouldn't let me in."

"We didn't want you to get hurt." Rindou said

"I don't give a single shit about what you wanted or not. I wanted to build my own gang, that's all that matter."

"But you didn't have to fake your disappearance ! What is wrong with you ? Are you fucking insane ?! Do you know how worried we were ?!" he added

You felt your blood boil

"See ?! It's always about you ! The Haitani brothers this, the Haitani brothers that ! It was getting annoying. I would never have been acknowledged if I didn't leave."

You were fucking crazy, they thought

Crazy enough to do a perfect replica of Bonten, even having brothers in your team

Maybe you even considered them as your own brothers, who knows

Ran sighed

"At least let me give your a last advice as your big brother. If you want your organisation to work, don't copy the work of others."

"What a fucked up family, huh Takeomi ?"

He couldn't believe it

He had already grieved over you

But there you were, standing all mighty with your executives by your side

All of you looking down on him

"What, don't tell me you just remembered you had an other little sister ? Well, I'm not surprised after all. A little disappointed though."

Looking back on it now, it's true that he hadn't been a good brother to you

Always prioritizing Senju because she was head of a great gang

And for what ?

She was dead now

"So, Takeomi, am I now worthy of being your sister ?"

He remembered Mochi saying he ran a little investigation on your organisation

He knew each of them

You were the reflection of Bonten, staring back at them, twisted smile plastered on your faces

You were mocking them

You were mocking him.

He hated you

Hajime hated you for how miserable you made him feel

He had lost Akane, and you left a few years later

"Have you managed to gather enough money to revive her ?" you laughed, "If not, I can help you !"

"Why did you do that ?"

"Why, you ask ? It's quite simple, if you wanna know. Just like you I needed money but you wouldn't help me. Scratch that, you wouldn't even listen to me when I asked for help. It was always Akane, money, Akane, money. But I'm not holding grudges today. I'm actually here to help you ! I met someone just like you and he helped me !"

At your words, one of your men approached Hajime and, in a flash, opened a bag to throw several bundles of bills at him

"Take this, sweet brother, maybe with it you can bribe God into giving her back !"

He felt like he couldn't even breathe anymore

To this day he spent millions and millions to find you, not believing that you died

But you didn't know that.

(continuation of Takeomi's)

"What about you, Haruchiyo ? Do you remember me ? Were you even aware of my existence ?"

It's true that he didn't care about his sibling back then

He still doesn't

So your little mascarade doesn't affect him at all

Amazed yes, but not in the least touched

You were nothing to him but an enemy he could kill without thinking twice on it

"Sanzu huh ? I see you got creative. But don't worry ! I resent you way less than Takeomi !"

"Tell me, Akashi, it's true that I did not reached out to you, but have you ever tried reaching out to me ?"

He wouldn't even call you by your first name

You were seeking for approval, he surely wouldn't give it to you.

♡

[moonlit-ocs]

OC Bio: DC’s Titans

Name: Carmen Kyle

Name Meaning: Carmen: The name Carmen is a girl's name of Spanish origin meaning "garden."

Nickname(s): Kitten, Darling,

Alias(es): Stray

Occupation: Cat Burglar (formerly/occasionally), Titan/Vigilante

Alignment: ESTP-A/Neutral Evil

Gender: Female

Sexuality: Bisexual

Age/Birthday: May 22

Height: 5’5”

Hair Color/Type/Length: Black/Curly/Upper Back

Eye Color: Green

Body Markings: Various cat scratches

Family: Selina Kyle (Paternal Aunt), Titans

Love Interest(s): Dick Grayson

Birthplace: Gotham City

Languages: English, Spanish

Skills/Powers: Expert burglar, Skilled with a whip, other small gadgets, Gymnast, Hand-to-hand combatant, Quick reflexes, Utilizes cat claws, has been known to go off-brand and use guns without lethal intent, Charisma/Persuasion

Likes: thrifting, cats, graffiti, puns, playing “cat and mouse,” chocolate milk, night time, the moon and stars (when visible), grunge styles, shiny things, stealing from vigilantes, plot twists, gifts, flirting

Dislikes: most Gotham Rogues, getting caught, police, people who can’t take a joke, missing people, people, jealousy, cat scratches, when people don’t trust her

Catchphrase: “meow” (ironically), “i will fucking bite you” (unironically)

Backstory: Carmen Kyle was born to two drug addicts who wanted nothing to do with her, her father being the brother of Selina Kyle, who decided to take her niece in after her brother and his baby momma skipped town.

Carmen was brought up in Gotham City and soon noticed Aunt Selina’s antics, finding the Catwoman persona quite intriguing. She was determined to be just like her, and Selina felt that while it may not be conventional parenting, it sure did help her.

Stray was born on the streets of Gotham, learning the craft of various thievery styles and how to defend herself, but as the years went on, things got out of hand. Catwoman and Batman bumped into each other dozens of times, but that entailed that their protégés did, as well. Robin and Stray became best friends and enemies in mere moments, where this bond would serve a lifetime.

As the two grew older and Selina began easing up on her crimes for her new flame, she taught Carmen to do the same. It was no surprise that Stray and Robin had feelings for each other. Young love was a funny thing. Things teetered on and off for years until the Titans became a spoken idea. Stray had so many close calls and even began to feel guilt for her crimes, although it was fun to play cat and bird when she snagged anything. She decided to officially get her act together after Dick and Carmen made it official, and the two set off for San Diego.

Selina was so proud of her niece, but missed her all the same. And was worried for her because that reputation would follow her around with the rest of those heroes. And it did for a while, being accused every time something was out of place in the Tower. But eventually the team learned to trust her. The Titans became family to her, and she’d cherish the time with them as best as she could, but when Garth and Jericho died, things changed.

Dick and Carmen moved back to Gotham, staying together while trying to process their failures as heroes. Over the next few years, they could feel themselves drifting apart, and ultimately split by Dick’s own accord. In a moment—more like fit—of weakness, Carmen turned back to burglary to feel something again and kept her distance from her ex-boyfriend, which didn’t always work. But she tried.

That is, until he called her from Detroit.

Faceclaim: Ariela Barer

[akirosama777]

If nothing brings me joy and I always feel quite hollow, does that mean I've died inside already because I refused to follow...

Every person in the world who seems to skate, to flutter by... while the music fills my hollow ears and bleeds from glassy eyes?

Am I worth the amount of energy that I never seem to have, while the mother I once called a friend goes out to poison herself and die?

And I stand here in the bleakness of a hollow, brittle world, while I pick up all of the pieces that she left when she unfurled...

I am broken and I'm bleeding... I have nothing left to give, but the love I'd once begun to give, and barely alive to live.

I was beautiful once... I had a dream... had a goal or two in mind... but I'm sitting here in the broken wake that her destruction left behind.

But it began way before my time, began with a little girl... my mom... and her grandpa, such a piece shit, let's called the bastard, "Tom,"

Took from her, her innocence, shattered her life apart, sent her down a road of agony, and her father killed her heart.

When he sent her far away at the behest of a beastly cunt, sent her to a boarding school, a common parental stunt.

And her life began at 11 when she'd had it all ripped away, sent her down that road of agony in blood and tears was paved.

Then at 16 she met a Jewish man, who with her had his way, then abandoned her with two children on one fateful Christmas day...

But she picked up the pieces, worked 3 jobs, she became addicted to a couple of drugs... met my father in a satanic band, acting like a thug.

So when she fell in love with him, got him to change his ways, both of them kicked the drugs they'd started and set out on another day...

She soon became again pregnant with my father's first born son, and he tried to kill the baby, with a doctor... not a gun...

Told her if she loved him badly, loved him half as much as she'd said, that she'd abort that fetus and remove its tiny head.

But she didnt... and he stayed... later giving birth to me... but that's not the last of her children... I was only number three.

Then as I grew he would abuse me, threaten, beat and apparently molest... then she had my little brother but he'd never face these tests...

As I began to mature and grow, I could see the patterns form, and my mind became a labyrinth as the alters would soon be born.

And at 6 I tried to end it... but my little brother was there... just one of the many treasures that kept me from joining the City of Air.

And he saved me... I don't know why, but he removed the chord I would choose... saved me from my madness as the alters began to fuse.

All the while my mother from her past she'd grown quite numb... and my father kept her helpless, kept her silent... kept her dumb.

My older brother fell to drugs and disappeared one day... right around the time, eleven I think, where I realized I'm gay...

And my sister fell to young love, to a man who started fires... and my mother fell to drinking when the divorce set forth in ire...

Sent my sister too to heroin and my mother to her dark, while my brother depended greatly on my ability to endure the harsh...

So I shouldered all that hatred... shouldered all the pain inside... let the alters guide me forward through the labyrinth in my mind.

I pushed forward for my brother until my little sister was born... as my mother found another man who left her completely forlorn.

And another life depended on the strength I'd come to own... after all the pain of a father, who's approval was never shown.

I was broken, I was bleeding, I was yearning for a hand... never found it... never searched, for on my own I had to stand.

Now my brother... little brother, grown and turned into a guy, who too had shouldered pain and suffering likely due to mine.

And my sister, little sister, worst of all had witnessed decay... and was tortured by a mother who'd been through so much hate and pain...

But im here now... for my sisters... for my brothers best I can... all five of me are standing and I've grown into a man...

But I'm broken... fuck... im broken... and my mother now she's gone... left my darling little sister on a strangers dying lawn.

And I'm picking up the pieces... trying so hard to hold me up... trying so hard to remember but the memories are scuffed.

Yeah this story's probably cliche... im sure you've all heard it once before... heard about a broken persona raped and bloodied on the floor...

Yeah, you've probably already heard it... probably seen it on a show... nothing shocks you people anymore, when it's something you already know.

I'm so certain that it's pointless to write these words and cry... while my mothers out there drugging and likely about to die.

And my sister... my poor little sister... all those years I tried to protect... will soon be here to visit this pathetic, broken mess...

And I'm trying to keep it together... to tell the alters to quiet down... in my brief and silent lucidity in a new and peaceful town...

And despite my anger... sadness... despite the insidious voice of pain... I understand why mother did it... though I know it doesn't explain...

But her life was so much harder... she'd had so much love to give... but the entire world around her let her run into their shivs.

So she tried her best at surviving, passed those lessons on to us... taught us how to keep on fighting but never how to trust.

Now I'm married... and I love him... but I'm broken, hurting, mad... at the life they gave my mother and that treatment from my dad.

I'm so full of rage and agony... so full of hope and full of pain... that's why I can't get to healing... why I cry whenever it rains.

And she's missing... my mothers missing... a person who never could refrain... She went out to numb the agony, the voices in her brain.

And... I empathize. I sympathize... I understand those thoughts... im still fighting... im still trying... Im still battling... distraught...

For my sisters and my brothers I have never touched a drug... for my sisters and my brothers I have never said no to a hug.

For my sisters and my brothers I am fighting yet, so hard... to keep my head above the water and stay away from all the shards...

I won't cut myself again... I won't try suicide to commit. I won't do again what I'd tried to do at least five times... maybe six.

For my father I'll keep fighting... I'll keep being a better man... prove him wrong and keep on going... on his grave I'll one day stand.

For my family that was broken... I'll keep searching for our mom... I'll keep hoping she'll find solace deep within her sorrowful song.

Mom if you're out there somewhere breathing, just know I understand and care... Im still your standing pillar, still your darling baby bear...

For my little sister Anna and for Justin im still here... I'll do my best to outlive them and watch them live out all their years...

I will never let this agony... from my health or lack there of... push me down to join the army of the defeated by the drugs.

I will never let this anger, let this rage or let this pain, push me to the point again where I grow more alters in my brain.

I'll keep fighting for my dogs... keep on fighting for my man. Keep on fighting for my sisters... and for my brother's I will stand.

[artsy-moonwalker]

Would you go into more details about your OC’s backstories?? They all look so cool 😆

I would love to! Thank you so much for this question :)

I'm going to focus distinctly on their childhood for these descriptions.

(mentions of drug addiciton, war, and violence)

Before I get into their backstories, it is important to address their environmental situation for context.

In their childhood, there was a civil war going on within America. This is a fictional war, of course, taking place in the early 2000s. Lenis, Everest, Flint, and Darryon all have their parts to play, and the war affects the four in different ways. While Lenis, Everest, and Flint are trying to escape war from their hometown and cross the country, Darryon and his siblings are attending shelters and risk their lives trying to help in any way they can.

So now that we have some context of their biggest childhood dilemma, let's get into the four individually. I won't go into complete detail to avoid any spoilers I'd like to share later on, but I will dive into their personalities and importance. I don't know how long this post will be, but I'll try to keep it as short as I can.

Lenis, 13 years old - tall, blond, a bit tan, a distinct scar on his left jaw, brown eyes

Lenis lives in a small town in Ohio. It's a bit run down, and his house is in bad shape. Considering his family is lower class, he doesn't have much money to spend, and he gets by with what he has. He lives with his two strict parents, him being an only child. But he takes care of a stray cat that lives in a forest behind his home that he calls "Otter." Whenever he tries to get the cat to stay in the house, his parents don't allow it. They can't exactly afford to take care of an animal, especially when they have to pay for his monthly medication and doctor visits.

He has a bone condition where his bones are incredibly fragile. He can't walk for very long, and running is even worse on him. It doesn't take a lot of force to break a bone either, and he's had to visit the doctor numerous times for fractures and snaps. So he has a medication that helps him not feel the aching as much, and allows him to walk or run for a time. He is in no way a strong person. His physical strength is constantly challenged and he feels like a burden to those he loves whenever they have to make sacrifices to just to help him. Especially when it comes to his best friend, Everest.

He is always being protected by Everest. He's taken multiple punches for him, he has to carry him sometimes, he can't do a lot of outdoor activities with him due to how easy it is to get injured. Lenis hates this. He hates being held back and he hates that his best friend has to be held back too because of it. He often tells Everest that he can do things himself, but that ends with him getting hurt more than not.

Lenis really is a grateful and humble soul. He tries to find the good in every situation no matter how painful it can be. This is especially apparent for his friends. If anything is troubling them, he will do what he can to get them through it. His optimism was a lot more prominent when he was a child, though. After escaping war, he finds it difficult to find the good in bad situations. But that doesn't mean he won't try to. It's safe to say the light in his eyes are faded as he grew older.

Everest, 13 years old - short, red head, blue eyes

This is Lenis' best friend, that's how everyone at his school titles him. Because he is constantly by his side more than he is alone. He knew Lenis since he was a toddler due to their mothers being friends, and ever since then, Lenis would nickname him "Evvy." Everest was always like a brother to him. He was incredibly protective and would often put Lenis before him.

Emotions and Everest don't exactly work well together. He tends to be reserved. Cold and bitter, even. If he's showing any extreme emotion, it tends to be anger or frustration. But he has a soft spot for Lenis. He's really one of the only people around him that can make him smile. Other than his mom, of course, who he lives with down the street from Lenis. His mother was pregnant before he left home; his father having left after a short and abrupt divorce. Little information was given to him about why that occurred. But his mom was happier, and that's what he wanted. He was never close with his father anyway.

Everest knows that his protectiveness over his friends, especially Lenis, can be a fault at times. He's gotten hurt many times due to it, both mentally and physically. And it isn't even because his friends are defenseless. He knows they can protect themselves if they need to, but he cannot help himself. He can't let them get hurt if he can stop it. He speaks bluntly, and his words may go over a few lines, or he may be prone to starting arguments, but he is incredibly selfless. He means well in every action he takes despite all of that.

Flint, 12 years old - short, black buzz cut, large dark eyes

Flint is a troubled child to say the least. He's callous towards others, he seems to only care about himself, and he isn't afraid to use force and threaten violence. He was Lenis' biggest bully after ending his friendship with him in a desperate fit to steal his pain medicine. Yes, Lenis and him were friends before that. And Flint truly wanted to continue the friendship, but he needed those pills. Lenis wasn't going to just give them to him. So he had to resort to violence, thus harming Lenis, and regretting it later.

It's easy to think that maybe Flint had a drug addiction, and stole Lenis' pills because of that. But that isn't the case at all. It wasn't because of an addiction, it was for a much deeper reason.

His younger sister, Penny, was facing a horrible sickness that was going to kill her if she didn't get the right treatments. His mother, being constantly intoxicated with alcohol, spent all of her money on things she didn't need. So she couldn't afford Penny to have any treatment at all. Flint, who has been basically raising his little sister, decided to take matters into his own hands, and find any possible way to make her feel better. Even if it meant harming Lenis for some pills.

Flint loves his sister more than anyone. Or loved, at least. She unfortunately didn't make it long after the pain medicine incident.

He wants to be good, he really does. But Flint is difficult to get along with. Especially with Everest. Much like the red head, Flint has a short temper, and they always fight with each other. But also like Everest, he has a soft spot for Lenis (he is sort of like the peacemaker of the group). Flint is incredibly emotional, and he always says what's on his mind, even if they're not so nice things. He feels regretful for a lot of things, though. He's trying to be a better person, and befriending Lenis again is something he is determined to do.

Darryon, 12 years old - Average height, black curly hair, dark eyes, has an intense burn scar along his face

Darryon lives in California with his siblings, and only his siblings. His parents died in a car crash while they were on their way home from a relative's house. The war was breaking out, and they were caught up in it at the worst possible time. Darryon's oldest brother was a soldier in the war, and his oldest sister was her younger siblings' guardian while he was gone. He has five siblings, not counting himself. Three girls and two boys. And he is very close with each of them, especially his oldest sister, Carlitha. She followed shelters, and he did the same. For a long time, she was concerned for his wellbeing considering just how dangerous a job like this was. They were always venturing in war zones and had to face many hardships. But even at a young age, Darryon wanted to be part of something bigger than himself. His parents' death were a big motivator in his efforts, and he found that helping others get through the war was an effective coping mechanism.

He didn't go through these hardships without consequences, though. On one occasion, a shelter he was attending got bombed, and he was caught in the flames, leaving the brutal burn marks you see on him now. These marks filled the mouths of the other kids at his school when he tried going back. But how can anyone go back to a normal life after that? Luckily he had a good group of friends to back him up during his good and hard nights.

He has a very distinct sense of humor, and finds it easy to entertain himself when no one is around. Some of the kids at his school think he's weird because of his behavior at times. He talks to himself out loud, he has a funny laugh, he has a few imaginary friends (one stays with him even in his adulthood), etc. But he embraces those things more than anything, and his friends don't care, so why should he?

When he isn't helping at a shelter, he finds time for himself or his family. For example, he's very fascinated with nature, and enjoys drawing what he sees around him in a sketchbook. He's pretty good at it too. What started as drawings of birds or gardens soon turned into drawings of burnt landscapes and debris of towns. He liked to draw the people he would meet in shelters as well, and he kept every drawing, not knowing if that person survived after they parted ways or not.

Darryon's story does collide with the others at some point. He and his sister go to great lengths around the country, of course they're going to befriend Lenis, Everest, and Flint at some point, and it will certainly stay that way.

If you read this far, thank you! I really hope this little introduction to them has intrigued you, and if not, that's okay too :) I want to share more about them later on, and I plan to write out chapters to get the full story soon as well. I've been working on this story for more than a year now in private, and I'm really having fun, so I'm excited to share it with you. Thank you again!

[bqstqnbruin]

i can't believe you're such a shitty person that you would support evander kane like that. he's also a shitty person and who cares if he has an addiction?

I wasn't going to answer this but after sitting here and actually crying over it I decided fuck it I am

I reblogged this post because I agree with OP about it: Kane may be a shitty person, but he is ill, as she put it, regardless of the type of person he is otherwise.

When you have an addiction to something, anything, it not only affects you and your life, it affects everyone in your life as well.

My cousins childhood best friend just died from a drug overdose because of the addiction he had that he wouldn't get help for no matter how hard everyone pleaded with him to do so. His mother is now going to through absolute hell because of it. She cannot eat. She cannot sleep. She sits in front of the fire place at her daughter's house and rocks back and forth in her chair the entire fucking day because she lost her son and she's wondering where she went wrong that she as his mother couldn't help him.

A different cousin of mine, she's about 10 years older than me. Growing up, she was my role model, she was everything I wanted to be: she was the nicest person you'd ever meet, she was brilliant, gorgeous, she was a model, a national merit scholar finalist, on track to go to an ivy league school with dreams of being a lawyer and eventually working with the US Department of Justice. And then she got into a car accident and got addicted to pain killers which eventually led to other drugs and it ruined everything for her. She has overdosed twice and we were seconds away from losing her both times. She never finished high school and can't hold a steady job. She bounces from house to house because she can't keep up with rent and refuses to stay with her parents or brother and sister even though they have a place for her and have offered multiple times. She has two children whom she is unable to take care of because of her addiction and, while they're too young to understand what's going on (the oldest is seven I think?), they're suffering. They don't get to go home to a mother who is taking care of them, they don't have a mother who was willing to teach them anything like how to read, how to talk, basic things that you expect a parent to do when they choose to keep a child, and if it weren't for my uncle raising them as his own children despite the fact that he himself is dealing with his own health issues, they would be put into the foster care system which has a lot of issues in it and it constantly has to be asked which is scenario of them is going to cause the least amount of harm to them. When my grandmother died is when she really started going down hill and I not only had to deal with losing my grandmother, but losing my cousin. I haven't talked to her or even seen her in about 8 years because of this.

Evander Kane has done a lot of shitty things that I am aware of. I do not support him for any of that because it doesn't seem like he's learned from his mistakes and just kept going on with his life as if nothing happened. What I support is him getting the help he needs for his sake and his families sake. While drug addiction and a gambling addiction are not the same thing, I've seen first hand that addiction is still horrible to watch someone go through and then have to deal with the ramifications of it. I have not gone through nearly as much as Kane's family has gone probably gone through due to his addiction, but that doesn't mean they deserve this. That doesn't mean no one should care.

[priscilla9993]

Killian Jones and Alcoholism

This is mainly a summary of things relating Killian/Hook to alcohol/rum. It was done for a college paper and is very long, therefore it’s under the break. To warn you, it is going to be mainly Wish Hook based since I needed to narrow it down and it was easier to show how he handled alcohol as a recovering alcoholic. Enjoy!

The character in question for this case study is Killian Jones, well known by his more colorful moniker of Captain Hook, as portrayed from the ABC TV show Once Upon A Time. He lives in a region of a fantasy realm known as the Enchanted Forest. He used to be a Royal Navy Lieutenant with his older brother Liam, straight-laced on being good and not getting into trouble in any way, especially after getting somewhere in life and no longer subjected to being an indentured deckhand like when their father abandoned them as kids. During a daring quest to Neverland to find some medicine for the king, Peter Pan said they had been tricked to bring back a poisonous plant called Dreamshade, meant to be used as a weapon against unsuspecting enemies. Killian was wary, ready to denounce his service to the king, but his brother was willing to have faith in a noble king and country. With one swift motion of the plant’s prick hoping to prove otherwise, Liam began dying and realized his mistake. Recruiting the help of Pan and some magical water, Liam was cured but soon died in Killian’s arms on the voyage back to the king, the price of the magic being death if Liam ever left Neverland with the water running through his veins. His brother’s death made Killian vengeful at his king and country as his brother had been noble until the very end and everyone else was corrupt, playing noble, proving to him that the world was at fault. From that day on, he took over the ship and decided to be a pirate named Captain Jones, pursuing freedom, and throwing away all he’s ever known because being noble didn’t serve justice. This starts his life of thievery, promiscuity, and never-ending drinking. His coping solutions to deal with his emotional pain only gets worse when he loses his hand, first love of his life, Milah, and his honor after losing a duel against Rumplestiltskin, a coward turned into a powerful Dark One; which leads him on a path of revenge to kill the Rumplestiltskin, “the crocodile”, to avenge Milah and his pride. This leads him to makeshift a hook for a hand and him going by the nickname of Captain Hook, leaving the last piece of his past behind and never letting himself be vulnerable again.

Throughout the series, whenever he or someone in his vicinity is having a rough time, his solution is to pour out some alcohol and drink his feelings away, acting like an egotistical flirt rather than expressing himself and wallowing in misery. His choice of alcohol happens to be rum, a hard liquor. The acute symptoms he has in the show are the loss of judgment, a reddened face, confusion, potentially heightened sexual desire, and sometimes blackouts/unconsciousness. There are multiple times where he’s in a tavern, pouring doubloons into drinks for his crew, rum for himself, and flirting with women/barmaids to have a nightcap with. From here on, I will refer to him as Hook unless stated otherwise. On one occasion of his usual proclivities displaying or implying such symptoms, Hook tries to seduce a woman named Emma. She manages to use his habit of drinking to her advantage, making him jolly and willing to take her back to his ship for the said nightcap; her actual objective was being a distraction while his future self did recon for info on how to get back to their timeline in a Back to the Future sort of way. He continues heavily drinking on the way back with Emma without a care for his health. As soon as the plan goes awry with Hook seeing double, Emma not realizing Future Hook was still doing recon, he gets knocked out for good measure and partial jealousy. Future Hook justifies this, saying his past self was “asking to be knocked out, will wake up upset, and blame the rum.” The lines construe how frequent the drinking was for his future self to determine Hook’s ill-mannered disposition while drunk. 

Eventually, in a parallel way that stems from drunk Hook, is a feeble and spent pirate coined as “Wish Hook”. I have and will be focusing on this iteration for the whole of the paper, but what was written before was his younger self’s background. Wish Hook is the same guy as Hook, but years older down the line, differing paths from Future Hook as he never found love again with someone like Emma and had let his grief and alcohol from more recent negative events consume him. Wish Hook had lived out most of his lifespan, having been a sober father, but cursed to be poisoned any time he drew near his daughter after a witch encounter. Haunted by his regrets and somber circumstances, he turned back to an alcoholic, spending his days eased by rum. His body and actions in this form show the physical and mental effects of chronic alcohol consumption. About ten years or less had passed between his younger self and he had become an experienced middle-aged man with a complicated history, yet he looked far older than his years and decrepit. Without a doubt, by looking at him, people could assume he was an old drunk, his liver and heart having gotten fatty and overworked from the alcohol catching up to him. His belly was rotund, his hair disheveled and gray with streaks of white, his stance crumbling to nearly falling over with each step, and clothes dirtied with filth and old rum stains. Wish Hook still had a flirty and dramatic personality to cheer himself up and mask his turmoil, rum making him courageous and numb, while his actions told another story. He didn’t have sexual desires or try to provoke anyone by that point, just wanted to drown himself in alcohol. His words typically came out slurred, his movements sluggish and unrefined, and he had low problem-solving skills when it came to formulating a plan based on anything other than motive.

In the Enchanted Forest, alcohol like rum is not hard to come by as long as money is involved. Killian Jones/Captain Hook as a pirate drinking rum all the time did not affect him negatively socially or career-wise. If anything, it boosted his status and reputation. For him to be mingling in bars asking for expensive hard liquor and fine women to spend time with was a pleasantry. Bar owners got money, the crew got free alcohol, the women got paid, and he got to immerse himself in pleasure rather than thinking about trivial or serious things. Hook was the life of the party as a pirate captain, seen as a person with good tastes and great to have a fun time with when it came to alcohol. However, when it came to settling down and being a father later on in his life, Wish Hook reserved himself back to his more vulnerable side, caring about how his alcoholism could affect his parenting or child’s perspective. There are moments like that where he’s introspective and wants to do better by others that look up to him or who he cares about. In the show, when he is parenting, there is never a time where he has a bottle or flask of rum stashed nearby or is drinking. Wish Hook deems alcohol as the problem when it affects his judgment or his perceptions on how he could hurt the way people he loves view him. Love in any form brings him back to his core of being the best person he can be.

Killian Jones’s problem originates in nurture rather than nature because his alcohol problems started after he needed a reliable coping mechanism to lean on to deal with grief and anger. Although both nature and nurture influence him, for argument’s sake, nurture has the upper hand. Growing up, his father was a person he looked up to and wanted to be like, but that changed when he found out his father was a criminal who sold him and Liam to pay a route for a selfish escape. What little of his parents shown on-screen left betrayal or sadness in him, not the desire to drink. His parents weren’t clear on alcoholics or drug users as far as it goes. The only things he inherited from nature were probably his mischievous personality, temper, looks, and a high tolerance for alcohol. Living on a ship and being a poor deckhand, Killian didn’t seem to be the kind of guy to squander his savings on alcohol or other frivolous means. However, he would be on a ship constantly surrounded by adults who drank with a captain who cared more about money rather than morals, feeling squandered by his oppressed freedom and building resentment for authority. Without his brother steering him on track, Killian was no more than a young man with impulsive rebellious nature. When Liam went to get them navy papers to earn them their freedom from Captain Silver, it took Killian an offer of temptations from Silver, as much alcohol as he could drink and a bet on his money, for him to fall hook, line, and sinker; no pun intended. Alcohol and gambling meant a reprieve from thoughts, a chance at earning more than what he had before, and the same social standing as the other men aboard the ship. Perhaps, as much as he wanted to be strong as his brother, one good force cannot shield against all of the negative parts of society and adulthood. From Captain Silver, Killian got his first taste of alcohol and his desires did the rest, leaving him blackout drunk and penniless for Liam to find. As he grew older and slowly became Captain Hook, there was nothing about pirate life, being an adult, or people to keep him from drinking. He needed people to talk to, who supported him and he could feel vulnerable in front of, but the few people he trusted in his life were dead. As anyone knows, pirates steal treasure, so they’re not exactly the forgiving or down-to-earth types. Instead, rum became the solution to drown or fuel his emotions, being the substance of celebration and de-stressor.  

Hook’s rum/alcohol addiction would fall more on the dependence spectrum rather than abuse. What had started as a small reprieve to the woes of life became a daily saving grace when he was wracked with loneliness or anger. He depended on the rum to mask his disposition of physical pain from his missing limb as well as emotional pain having experienced love and loss. Abusing alcohol meant that it would put him into dangerous scenarios, have little to no commitment to change his habits to improve his health, and he’d put off important social aspects. If it was alcohol abuse, Hook wouldn’t try changing his habits when he sees it affects others or his relationship with those he loves. Sure, he spends most of his life binge drinking and making merry with the tides of life, but when given the chance and support to abstain from alcohol, he takes it in a heartbeat. For Wish Hook, the thought of being a father who abandons his child or messes up under hazy judgment didn’t add up to him. With the birth of his daughter, Alice, he made a vow to stay with her as long as he could and to be the person he thought she could be proud of. Nevertheless, when he had lost purpose in life by something he had no control over (via death, distance, or curse), his first reaction was to either turn back to alcohol or solve his problems. Sadly, after he had spent a couple of years looking for a cure for his poison heart curse, he gave up hope and chose to go from sobriety back to alcoholism, into a form of regrettable self-destruction. Hook knew that it was not the way to go about life but he felt he had no other choice and had nothing left to lose, leading him to further prioritize and depend on rum to continue living. He built a tolerance to it, needing a copious amount to get drunk, and potentially suffering withdrawals from it after getting in too deep. From the state he was in by the time he gets old and portly, being a nearly homeless drunkard, it can be assumed that he spent most of his days looking for money to acquire more alcohol so he could feel okay.  

Finally, by the end of the series, Killian Jones had managed to go through all the stages in the Stages of Change Model. He was in the Precontemplation stage as a pirate and Captain Hook as he didn’t see a problem in his daily rum and alcohol festivities, making no commitment to change his ways. By the time he gets to be Wish Hook and becomes a father, hesitant about settling down, he could be in the Contemplation stage. He’d want to do something about his alcohol problem and not be stuck relying on it but doesn’t know how to go about it or why he should, therefore staying stagnant to change. When he has his daughter, Alice, in his arms for the first time, we see him in the Preparation stage, planning to give up his ship, sea life, status, and most importantly, rum. Hook gives himself time to think of why he would do so and how he’d commit to it, eventually telling his crew the news. By the time he is taking care of her, he has already taken the actions needed to wean himself off alcohol and apply himself towards abstinence, taking him through the Action and Maintenance stages. There is a relapse back to the Contemplation stage in the paragraph before when he becomes poisoned and loses hope. Even so, the silver lining is that he had made the hard journey back into the Maintenance stage with the help of Ariel detoxing him and others giving him a magical second chance of bodily time renewal, sparking the hope to reunite with Alice and find a cure for his poisoned heart.  

Plans go awry on this end as we get to his final iteration as he is teleported and cursed into our modern day and age as Detective Rogers. Although his memories of what happened in the past as this persona are fuzzy, he is shown to stick to his renewed alcohol abstinence and maintains that in many ways, just like when he was Wish Hook. His habits become integrated as a function rather than a hindrance as part of the Maintenance stage. As Rogers, we can see him frequent bars such as Roni’s or Flynn’s Barcade when he is invited out with others. He is shown to let others know what to get him, as a regular or not, something non-alcoholic. This usually shows up as sparkling water or regular water with a lemon slice in it. His friends and work partner continue to support his sobriety through friendly acceptance and never forcing him to drink alcohol along with them. Rogers is tempted by alcohol again when he believes a missing girl from a cold case, one he was responsible for since he was drinking on the night she went missing, is dead. He sits on a park bench alone grieving, a full bottle of rum next to him, ready to drink. As Rogers gives it a whiff, he is disgusted at himself for getting back to this state again and slams the bottle down on the bench in frustration, not even having taken a sip. He came too far that doing so again would be meaningless and would get him nowhere. Even though he is in situations full of temptation, he makes huge strides to not relapse and maintain his sobriety, with the hopes that it will eventually lead him back on the right path of happiness and belonging. Fortunately, his actions have positive consequences that ring true when the curse breaks and he gets reunited with his daughter and has the strong support of friends and family. In conclusion, Hook is a flawed human being that is more complex and his struggle with alcohol/rum is just a part of him, one he will never lose but continues living with.