#i identify with gay/abrosexual

[canny-analyst]

Unrelated to anything, but I think the thing that made me go "OH THAT'S COMP HET!" the most is seeing genderbend versions of characters that I like.

As in, seeing a character I think is hot and I'm very attracted to getting genderbend/their gender changed, seeing their fem version specifically, and realizing how little attraction I have left for them.

Like yes, it's the same person, I KNOW THAT... but.

It's immediate, I always try to be attracted to them, but it's just not there.

With more androgynous versions it's not as strong a feeling, but I'm still attracted, it's just their fem/woman version.

[viad0]

Something i really hate about gen Z queers is that they’re more worried about what a queer person can or can’t do, than whether or not that person is happy

“Can a genderfluid person identify as lesbian even when they’re male? Can you identify as bi and gay? Are abrosexuals valid?” And the response is always people giving super specific explanations on who can/can’t identify as xyz, what is/isn’t “valid”, like if you don’t follow a list of rules to be a “good queer” you deserve to be treated like shit. I rarely see someone saying “If this is how they feel and they’re happy, then good for them” and when i do, it’s almost never a younger queer saying it

The whole point of fighting for lgbt rights is letting people be themselves without being shamed for not fitting in the cis/straight boxes, not turning lgbt identities into new strict boxes and shitting on anyone who enters the “wrong box”. People aren’t categories, they’re people

TLDR:

Edit: the image is a joke + i’m not saying you’re a horrible person just because you used to act like that when you were 12, but i do think people who harass someone because of their identity are horrible people + i shouldn’t have said just gen z queers because there are grown ass adults pushing 30 who act like that. And the image is a joke

edit 2, last thing that i should have clarified but forgor: I am gen z and i’m talking about my personal experience. I’m not like, a 35 year old talking shit about kids, i am gen z and i rarely feel 100% safe around queer people my age. I’ve met people irl who were assholes at 14, and then years later they’re adults and still act the exact same way

I know there are 30, 40, etc year olds who act like that, but in my experience this kind of behavior is more common and normalized among gen z, not just online but also irl

[autistic-and-radical]

My thoughts on "LGB drop the TQ+"

As a bisexual woman, I fully support the LGB drop the TQ+ movement. Being lesbian, gay and bisexual is rooted in biology. If you're a lesbian, you're a female attracted to other females, if you're gay, you're a male attracted to other males and if you're bisexual then you're attracted to both males and females. And what is TQ+ about? TQ+ is about identity, self-expression and labels. The definitions are loose, too vast and fluid. Nothing is clear, nothing is simple, but everything is offensive. Our generation is so deep in an identity crisis and self-hate that they need a thousand labels and definitions to feel themselves. They don't focus on who they are as a person. In the 80s and 90s when teenagers were figuring out who they are and looking for an identity, they joined subcultures. Also, in that time all gays and lesbians and bisexuals were gender non-conforming and it didn't change their identity. The TQ+ is still growing, teenagers nowadays need labels to feel valid, heard and accepted, but it only confuses them more and instead of helping them find themselves. I know that, because I've been there, done that. A year ago I identified as a fem-aligned non-binary, abrosexual person. Now, when I find the root of my problems and self-hate? I realized that I'm just a bisexual woman. And I feel a lot better like this.

here's a really cool video essay on this topic:

[yourfavismspechomohet]

love, there’s no such thing as a “bi lesbian.” someone can’t be bi and a lesbian. Coming from a lesbian myself it just doesn’t happen that way. Being a bisexual means that you like BOTH, being a lesbian means you ONLY like non men. It’s a mockery of real lesbians, it’s not a real sexuality.

Let’s take this apart separately, shall we?

“There’s no such thing as a Bi Lesbian”

Tell that to all the Bi Lesbians that follow me, and like my posts, and request for posts.

Tell that to the Bi Lesbians I reblog from and talk to occasionally.

Tell that to the older queers that identify as Bi Lesbians.

I guess apparently they don’t exist then. 🤷

“Someone can’t be Bi and a Lesbian”

Ah, this is a very popular one on this blog that I keep getting. I could link you to those, but I won’t. Here’s some ways you can be Bi and a Lesbian at the same time:

Biromantic Homosexuals

Homoromantic Bisexuals

Bi people who label themselves as Lesbians, to reclaim queer history. Because ALL Sapphics, regardless of if they were attracted to men or not, were referred to as Lesbians.

Bi people may also label themselves as Lesbians to reclaim being called a Lesbian by Biphobes trying to get them to pick one.

Bi people who lean more towards women, may call themselves Bi Lesbians.

Abroromantics/Abrosexuals may label themselves as Bi Lesbians because their orientation only swings back and forth between those two.

“Coming from a Lesbian myself, it just doesn’t happen that way.”

Well, for the second part, “It doesn’t happen that way”, just go back to the previous comments on “Someone can’t be Bi and a Lesbian”. It does and can happen.

Now for the first part “Coming from a Lesbian myself”. I hear this a lot. Not just from Lesbians, not just from queer people, but people of all different communities, one thing I hear all the time is “Coming from a [Blank] myself”. You need to understand that you are not the only Lesbian on earth. And Lesbians are not a hive-mind. You’re not all the same, and you’re not all going to have the same opinions. If that were the case, all Lesbians would look, talk, act the same way, and have the same views. But you don’t, because you’re not a hive-mind. Simply implying that all people of the same sexuality should have the same opinions is wrong. Believe it or not, I’ve seen all different kinds of lesbians who were Pro-Mspec Lesbian, who were Anti-Mspec Lesbian, and were neutral on Mspec Lesbians. And if all Lesbians had the same opinions, you would not be separated on these different opinions.

“Being a bisexual means that you like BOTH, being a lesbian means you ONLY like non men.”

Being Bi means that you could just about like any gender. It doesn’t just mean both, as in men and women. Bi people could definitely just be attracted to women and men, but they’re also Bi people attracted to all different kinds of genders under the Nonbinary umbrella.

As for being a Lesbian, it means that you’re attracted to women and Nonbinary people. And if we can agree on that, we also have to agree that there are other Nonbinary genders where one identifies as a woman AND a man, that you may also be attracted to. Saying that Lesbians don’t like men excludes Multigender people. Even if that’s not how you mean for it to sound, I can tell you that a lot of Multigender people feel that way.

Also, a common misconception is that Non-Men and Non-Women is okay to use for Gay and Lesbian definitions. It’s not. What you probably didn’t know, is that the terms have racist origins. Black and indigenous queer people have literally been talking about this since this definition was coined. “Non-Men” and “Non-Women” are terms that have been historically used to describe the degendering of black people.

Forcing these terms for queer definitions is Anti-Black, I could forgive you if you didn’t know that and stop using those definitions after now knowing the origins.

But if you still use these definitions even after knowing this, congratulations! You’re racist! Pretty sure there was a book about this, “Bad faith and anti-black racism” by Lewis R. Gordon.

“It’s a mockery of real lesbians, it’s not a real sexuality.”

Mspecs have just as big a part in Lesbian history as Lesbians.

All sapphics were Lesbians regardless of if they liked men.

The term “Bi Lesbian” has been around since the 70s. I’d like to see you try and tell an older queer Bi Lesbian, that they’re “mocking” Lesbians and that their sexuality isn’t real. They probably accomplished more than you have in your entire life, because you want to fight with people on queer labels that you think are and aren’t valid because apparently no queer identity is acceptable unless you agree with it.

Love, wether you like it or not, Bi Lesbians and even male Lesbians have always existed and will continue existing. And they don’t need your permission to be themselves.

[our-abro-experience]

hello, and welcome to our abro experience!!

i'm ash/rhylee!! you can use whichever name you like best

i use any and all pronouns (short psa about this at the bottom of the post). my identity is honestly very fluid- i considered for a time that i was genderfluid, but i'm probably abrogender. also abrosexual. idk man it's confusing

this blog is open to all of you who would like to share your abro experiences, ask questions, give answers or suggestions, and more!! i'm looking forward to meeting all of you!

abrogender describes gender fluidity in a way that is sort of similar to being genderfluid. if you're abrogender, your gender fluctuates in a way that is impossible to pin down, or you have so many tiny aspects to your gender that you're constantly discovering it.

abrosexual is the same idea as abrogender, except with your sexuality. someone who's abrosexual would find their sexual identity shifts often- they might identify with the term gay, and then might feel attracted to all genders, and then might not feel any attraction at all.

link to a person's explanation of their abrosexual identity

this blog was inspired by @our-queer-experience, @our-nonbinary-experience, @our-genderfluid-experience, @our-questioning-experience, @our-maverique-experience, and more

my other blog is @lappelduvide-thesevenumbrellas on which i mostly shitpost and reblog shitposts

ALRIGHT TIME TO EXPLAIN

when i say i want you to use any and all pronouns for me, i mean ANY AND ALL

THEY/THEM/THEIR

VEY/VEM/VAIR

SHE/HER, HE/HIM, XE/XEM

USE NEOPRONOUNS, MAKE UP PRONOUNS, I DON'T CARE

USE ALL PRONOUNS

[itsoktocallmegay]

You know, I’ve seen more people learn about abrosexual and abroromantic lately, but even queer people do not seem to understand just what that can mean for an abro person, especially multigender and genderfluid abrospecs. Like, yes, sometimes I’m a lesbian, and sometimes I’m a gay man. Yes, sometimes I’m omni or pan. And, this is made worse by those who don’t know what the Split Attraction Model is or monos who don’t support it, because sometimes I feel no romantic or sexual attraction (I mostly identify as an angled aroace,) sometimes I’m panromantic and omnisexual, other times I’m panplantonic and switch to omniplatonic. And, sometimes I switch between aspec identities as well, like switching from cupioromantic to demiromantic, or from cupiosexual to apohtiosexual to orchidsexual, or demiplantonic to caedplatonic to orchidplantoic, and so on. Abro literally just means one’s orientation is fluid or changes, and people will say it’s a valid label and then turn around and call other labels abrospec people use invalid. I’m so tired of making my abro and genderfluid identity more palatable to others.

[midnight-fox-boy]

I made a post about labels being as useful/important as you make them and I want to branch off of that to specifically talk about the m-spec umbrella.

A lot of discourse exists over this but aside from that, I know a lot of people have struggled with not knowing exactly where they sit on that spectrum, when they have imposter syndrome with the label(s) they have chosen, dealing with being invalidated, etc. so heres some validation:

You're not inherently transphobic/enbyphobic for identifying as bisexual. Maybe it's just the term that's felt comfortable for so long and that's chill. Maybe you like it because it's a bit more vague than some other labels, maybe you use one of the lesser "known" definitions of bi even if it's a long standing one (i.e. attraction to the same gender as yourself and other genders), or maybe it's just the label you vibe with and the specific reason doesn't really matter!

Pansexuality doesn't mean you can't occasionally crave interactions (romantic/sexual/sensual) with people of specific genders! If your version of pansexuality is attraction regardless of gender, that doesn't mean that occasional drifts from your norm/usual magically means you have to change your label.

Omnisexuality isn't the exact same as pansexual and I know a lot of y'all are tired of hearing that it is. Overlap certainly exists and many people could identify as one or the other, but that's true for so many labels on different spectrums.

To my polysexuals, I too am frustrated with the constant correlation to polyamory (people think they're the same thing). I don't even identify as polysexual and I feel that pain.

You're still homo/heteroflexible even if you're dating one of your exceptions/rare cases of attraction to someone of that gender. You don't have to drop this label if it makes you happy and brings you comfort. Your sexuality is not invalidated by the person(s) you are dating.

M-spec gays/lesbians are so valid and boiling sexuality down to 100% strict AF labels is harmful. There's so many reasons one may identify as such, and regardless of your reasons, it's not any stranger's business.

Abrosexuals (who consider themselves/their label mspec) aren't confused. You're not doing anything wrong by acknowledging your sexuality is fluid and embracing that.

The multisexual umbrella is such a diverse and expensive spectrum that trying to reduce people down to one strict definition of being attracted to multiple genders is silly. Sexuality as a whole is a very complicated thing and can be experienced in so many ways. Sometimes something is just too vague for you personally, or even too specific, and that's chill. Whatever label or lackthereof makes you happy is the right choice.

[cowboyjen68]

hi Jen! I've just stumbled across your blog and read some of your posts and you seem like a really cool person, so I hope that you can help me.

I'm fairly young, and I've been pretty comfortable in my butch identity (still very much a baby butch, but I've felt this way for a long time) but I'm worried about my sexuality. See, I've been questioning it for a very long time (I've gone so far as to say I'm Abrosexual with how much it shifts) and I've just decided on not labeling my sexuality besides queer/gay. I was wondering if it was okay to still call myself a butch and not identify as a lesbian? Obviously the answer is different for everyone, but I trust your judgement, Jen.

Thank you for being awesome!! 🖖

You are correct and I think it will depend on who you ask and their experiences, age, regions of the world they live in and their connection /definition of butch, which can vary.

In my lifetime and experiences, butch has been used by lesbians to differentiate how they are perceived as masculine or "different" as opposed to straight women or bi sexual women. It is not to say that I have not seen others use butch, it is just not a word I would apply to someone who is not a lesbian.

My connection with the word butch is solely based on the reality that I am a lesbian and that is and will remain stable and unchangeable. I strongly believe based on my life and the other lesbians I have met and befriended, our sexual orientation does not change BUT our understanding of it does as we learn more about the world and gather more information on how our sexuality fits into the world that tells us being a lesbian is not acceptable or even down right bad.

If I was sitting with you having coffee and chatting i would say if you feel an attachment to butch because you feel a connection to butch lesbians, it is not just the butch part that is resonating with you.

I would also say don't rush, it is okay to be wrong and to be confused about your sexuality and no "butch police" are going to take away your leather wrist band stamped "butch" or tell you you can't use it. Most people don't really give it a thought. However, if you use butch around lesbians be prepared to be assumed lesbian because that is what it will imply to most.

I googled "abrosexual" and it sounds like a word that encompasses the common theme many young lesbians share, being unsure and worried and confused about their sexual orientation. A condition most often brought on by poor media representation, socially produced false information and misunderstanding of the lesbian experience. Basically, most young people who are not straight, and some who are, go thought a time or several times of questioning who they are attracted to.

You are right on track to figuring things out.

[viscerax]

Creepypasta + MH Gender/Sexuality Headcanons!

Creepz!

Jeff The Killer

I hc Jeff as trans FtM, and bisexual, however he leans more towards men!

Eyeless Jack

EJ is another of our trans FtM boys, he/they pronouns, and I believe he is pansexual

Toby

Transmasc, but doesn't really stick to a very binary trans identity. If you asked him he'd probably just shrug and says he doesn't know. If I had to stick a label to it, I'd saw Genderqueer or Genderfluid. He's pretty firm on t4t, but wouldn't entirely be opposed to being with a cis person. It depends on trust levels and such. Bisexual with a preference towards men.

Nina The Killer

AMAB Genderqueer, neopronoun user, she is cool with just about any pronouns being used on xem. She is abrosexual and will have days where she will swear off men for the rest of her life and then the next day be thirsting over some cute emo boy xe saw on pinterest.

Jane The Killer

Massive lesbian. Cis woman, uses she/they. Their identity isn't too 'different' or anything like that like the other creeps, and sometimes she thinks she's boring for it, but Nat always reassures her that she isn't.

Natalie/Clockwork

Speak of the devil. She's MtF, lesbian, she/her pronouns. Big fucking lesbian for Jane.

Marble Hornets

Alex Kralie

Transmasc Genderqueer. He doesn't rlly like to put a label on it. He presents more masculine but if someone asks him what he identifies as/what his pronouns are, he just shrugs. Pansexual KING. Polyamorous :3

Timothy Wright

Trans FtM. No surgeries and never plans on getting them but stays on T. As for sexuality, I believe he's demisexual, and homoromantic. Also polyamorous.

Jay Merrick

Transmasc, he/they pronouns but also secretly thinks neopronkuns are cool as fuck. He hasn't told anyone about that though so its just a thought he keeps to himself. Has top surgery and no bottom surgery, on T. Gay gay Homosexual gay. Again, polyamorous.

Brian Thomas

Cis Male, he/they pronouns!! I believe he's bisexual with a preference for men. Also a polyamorous king.

Jessica Locke

Trans MtF, she/they pronouns, and a raging lesbian <33 good for her!!!

[thatonegaybrit]

; hey everyone !! It's officially pride month, and since I'm an absolute fucking ambitious idiot I've made a list, enjoy.

; I love you

Lesbians ( ALL LESBIANS !! )

Sapphics

Biromantics

Bigenders

Bigenderfluxes

Bisexuals

Polysexuals

Polyromantics

Polygenders

Omnisexuals

Omniromantics

Omnigenders

Omnigenderfluxes

Pansexuals

Panromantics

Pangenders

Demiboys

Demigirls

Demigenders

Demifluxes

Demisexuals

Demiromantics

Graysexuals

Grayromantics

Asexuals

Aromantics

Acefluxes

Arofluxes

Aroaces

Aroacespecs

Acespecs

Arospecs

Quoiromantics

Qouisexuals

Cupidsexuals

Cupidromantics

Lithromantics

Lithrosexuals

Gays

Genderfluids

Genderfluxes

Apagenders

Xenogenders

Intersexuals

Agenders

Transgenders

Transfemmes

Transmascs

Non-binaries

Genderqueers

Akoisexuals

Akoiromantics

Queers

Attractiofluxes

Abrosexuals

Abromantics

Polyamorous-es

Ambiamorous-es

Fraysexuals

Frayromanticss

Uranics

Nebulas

Neptunics

Orchidsexuals

Orchidromantics

Genderflors

Genderflirs

Genderfauns

Boyfluxs

Girlfluxs

Faesaris

Questioning ppl

Maveriques

Pomosexuals

Achilleans

Torics

Trigenders

Libramascs

Librafemmes

Libragenders

Paragirls

Paraboys

Berrisexuals

Berriromantics

Almondsexuals

Almondromantics

Bellussexuals

Bellusromantics

Genderhoarders

Xenohoarders

Sequencesexuals

Polarsexuals

Two spirits

Enbians

Reciproromantics

Aporagenders

Finromantics

Finsexuals

Reciprosexuals

Androgynes

; is this list meant to demean or invalidate anyone who isn't on it ?? No. It's showing you that in just a few minutes ( seriously, minutes. ) I've listed 100 identities. 1 0 0. The LGBTQIA+ community is vast. So so incredibly vast !! Even if your identity is not listed on here, you're still so so valid and I love you so much. You're a part of this community, you're important and you're you. Whether you use 20+ labels or prefer not to just roll with it and use none, whether you use " common " labels like bi or lesbian, or you use an array of xenogenders that js describe you so perfectly. Whatever. As long as you're comfortable and you're happy with your identity or lack thereof, then I'm so proud of you.

; or if you haven't yet figured out what labels to use or you're shuffling between loads in confusion, that's okay !! Finding yourself takes time, it could take forever, you as a person are constantly changing and so how you identify is " allowed " to change w that. It's okay. You're still valid and you're still a part of this community.

; to the people who are out and proud, whether those people were accepting or not, you're so valid and brave and I'm so proud of you !! And you're an inspiration to those around you I'm sure. And to those still closeted for whatever reason .. It's alright, everything will be okay. You don't have to tell anyone anything, you don't owe anyone anything, you're not lying to them or anything ( it's only a lie if they're entitled to know ) !! And when the time comes, whoever you tell, I wish you luck. For now simply stay safe, be yourself and don't let anyone stop you !!

; happy pride everyone, the fun has only js begun !! Get ready to taste the mother fucking rainbow !! >:]] /nsx

; I'd also like to say if you want me to add to this list then feel free to shoot me an ask or message !! /gen /nf

[genderqueerdykes]

heya

i can't sleep because my sexuality in relationship to my gender has been bothering me.

im transmasc, but genderfluid. not just boy/girl genderfluidity, it's all over the place. and i feel like i identify with being a gay man sometimes, and i also go through periods of feeling like a masculine lesbian.

i know how controversial this is and it breaks my heart because i can't figure out what to do. i know my identity should be for me, but i don't want to make people uncomfortable if i come off as a boy who's a lesbian sometimes.

also i feel intense imposter syndrome over this when i switch around. but it undeniably makes me feel like myself when i say I'm a transmasc genderfluid bi lesbian, which makes me feel good of course. i just wish i could stop feeling bad about it

is any of this normal and is there any other genderfluid ppl with complicated relationships to their sexuality? i feel alone here i guess

love your blog btw makes me happy and validated when i read what you and your followers have to say to people 💖

hello! thanks for stopping by!

i think it can be very easy to work ourselves up and over think things when it comes to how people will receive us in queer spaces- online queer spaces have been needlessly hostile over the past few years, mostly due to the relative anonymity and virtually zero consequences for being harmful and rude. it's okay to get scared sometimes

it may seem 'contradictory' or 'controversial' but it isn't that uncommon to go from identifying as a gay man to identifying as a masculine lesbian! genderfluidity means your genders can be. whatever. there's no set rules, and it's okay if your attraction changes when your gender does. mine does, as well. abrosexual and abroromantic may suit you

you don't have to pass any tests or anything like that to be successfully seen as genderfluid, it's okay if you change to be whatever, whenever. i always identify as a butch lesbian & a femme gay bear, all the time, no matter how I feel or who is fronting in my system. while some cishets may not get it, most queer people i explain this to say "oh yeah, i totally caught that vibe"

it can be scary to have "Strange" identities, but the meaning of "queer" is literally "weird" and having a weird identity falls right in line with the community. you're allowed to be a transmasculine lesbian, and you are even allowed to be a male/boy lesbian- there is no actual cosmic rule stating that lesbians cannot be men, partially men, or be genderfluid and be men sometimes

regardless of how others perceive you, you know who you are. you are the arbiter of your lived experience, and while someone misinterpreting you can be painful and inconvenient, it shouldn't define your experience. if people don't understand, keep going til you find the ones who do, and the ones who try to. even if people don't "Get" your gender, there are a lot of folks who will respect it, anyways, and you deserve that

hope that helps and makes sense. take care of yourself, good luck out there. there are no rules when it comes to be genderfluid. genderfluid people are encouraged to fuck with gender, rules, roles, presentation, etc. and it's only natural that a genderfluid person will have identities that "conflict" when approached through a non-queer lens. identities don't have to "make sense", they are mostly comprised of feelings !

good luck out there! feel free to stop by again

[edwardallenpoe]

thinking about how last year I went to pride with my gay flag around my shoulders and identifying a bear cub exclusively attracted to men and mascs and now I'm going to pride in two days (on my birthday no less) identifying as a bear cub AND a butch bi lesbian boy/fagdyke. Abrosexuality is so wild. I wonder what it'll be next year.

[bisexualsafespace]

I am a black stripe aromantic. I have never been romantically attracted to anything or anyone, I have been confusing platonic, sensual and sexual attraction with romantic attraction, I am a aromantic bisexual (or fluid/abrosexual idk) I still identify as bi-gay, because I can't imagine sex with a girl.

arobice!

[1424xgaywolf]

I wanted to share my queer identity with anyone who finds this post. If someone in the community asked me who I am, if they asked for labels, I would say I’m “bisexual abrosexual-abroromantic transmasc nonbinary sapphillean” because they would understand what that means and would (hopefully) be supportive of all of it. I know that there are some transphobic and bi-pan-phobic etc people in the community, and I’ve never understood it. I figured that out of everyone, people in the community would be the most unconditionally accepting and supportive people.

But if someone who either doesn’t understand, wants to understand, or if I’m “testing the waters” to see if they are an ally, then I would most likely just say I’m queer/gay because both of those are umbrella terms that aren’t specific labels. Sometimes I like knowing what labels fit me because it comforts me to know that there are other people like me and that I’m not just a big question mark, but other times I just don’t want labels, especially because I have so many and it just would be so exhausting to have to explain what they all mean generally and how I fit into those labels. If you use labels I will 100% support you, even if I don’t fully understand it because labels are your choice and I respect that. Sometimes though I just wish that the world wasn’t a place that relies so strongly on trying to stuff people into their arbitrary and binary boxes.

I also just want to clear this up for anyone who gets confused, but “male female intersex” are the sex you were assigned at birth, pertaining to your biology and your reproductive organs. “Man woman nonbinary etc” are genders, and gender is a social construct. When I think of the word “female” I think of ciswomen who identify with the gender assigned at birth, as well as trans men, trans mascs, and nonbinary people who were assigned female at birth, because you are still a female. I will never call a trans/nb/etc person a woman if that’s not who they are, but you will technically always be a female because of biology but that is not a bad thing. Same goes for amab people. I’m afab and I realize that there’s nothing I could do to change that, because time travel hasn’t been invented yet lol. I understand that some people might not like the fact that they were either afab/amab because they don’t identify with the gender they were born as, but we as a society need to separate sex and gender because the two are not the same and trying to say they are is an arbitrary and outdated way of thinking.

Furthermore, if you are an older person who uses the argument “back in my day” or “in my generation” for quite literally anything you could use that argument for, I would like to point out that this is no longer your day, this is a new day and trying to say that your day was the right day is like saying we should go back to cavemen time because you’re basically cavemen/women by now. Your days are over and we have already evolved into a generation that is more accepting (though sadly still not completely) of EVERYONE. If you want to try and ignore the existence of queer people, other religions, other races (different than whatever your’s is), then go right ahead because it won’t change a thing. We’ll still exist no matter how you try and squash us and force us into your ways. We are resilient and have been since the beginning.

Thank you for coming to my ted talk.

[genderstarbucks]

Coming Out Post Ig?

I don't really know where to start with this so I'm just gonna get into it

Cw for a bit of a long rant, no triggering topics but just read with some slight caution

I think I'm bigay? I've been questioning my sexuality for about 4 years and I could never find a label that stuck. I started with bisexual, then pansexual, then throughout the years my sexuality has changed but it's been mostly been between bi and gay. I've used homoflexible a few times, and it felt right, but something felt off. I felt it didn't completely cover what my attraction felt like. It's been hard for me to differentiate between romantic and sexual attraction, so I've just been using non-sam labels, and just saying I'm bisexual with a lean. Recently I've used abrosexual and that felt right too, but not completely. I've tried abrogay and abroachillean because I am mostly gay but it just didn't feel completely right, I didn't feel complete. I used to be an exclusionist (ew) and against mspec lesbians/gays/straights but luckily I've had friends and this wonderful community to educate me. I think the only reason I was an exclus was because I had internalized bigayphobia, as soon as someone taught me what it was, it really wasn't that hard to understand. Some people are on the sam and some people are fluid between 2 labels. I also think it was because I was with a toxic friend group (who I've since dropped ((thank god)) who was VERY against mspec lesbians/gays/straights. I mean, I also used to be anti-mogai because my ex gf was pounding it into my head how "bad" it was (she was literally cis too lmao) I'm glad I've met and am in such a wonderful community that is accepting of all good-faith identities. Anyway, earlier today I started researching bigay more and kept re-reading the description as to why someone might use the term bigay and then I realized. That's me. I am bigay. The term that actually resonates with me is the thing I've been avoiding the most. I was literally TERRIFIED about adding bigay to my prns page (ik I don't have to but I just want to) even though I know the only people who are gonna see it are my friends (who are accepting of it) and anybody who clicks on the link in my pinned post (which is most likely gonna be an inclus) I've been thinking about if I'm bigay (or just mspec gay) for a while now, but I refused to even accept myself of the possibility of being an mspec gay. I genuinely don't understand exclusionists, I used to be one and all I did was do a little research as to why someone might identify that way, and I changed my views. If you can accept things like nonbinary boy or agender girl, then you can accept mspec lesbians/gays/straights too. I'm glad I've cut off those exclus friends, now I can finally be myself. I think my sexual journey is over, I think this is the label I've been looking for, for so long. Ykw I'm proud to say I'm bigay, I'm proud to use contradictory labels. I'm a nonbinary boy AND a biromantic gay, and I'm god damn proud of it. If you're questioning whether you're mspec and a lesbian/gay/straight then it's okay. Those labels aren't "bad" or "invalid", if it describes you, then use it. You can use "contradictory" labels if you'd like, don't give a fuck what anyone thinks. All that matters is that you accept yourself, all that matters is using the labels you want that make you feel comfortable.

My identity has come a long way over the years, but I think I'm finally happy to say I'm comfortable where I am. I'm an agender boy, enboy and a demienboy, also bigay, and exclusionists can fuck off!

I didn't mean to make this that long but oh well 💀

TLDR; Sexuality confusing, omg I'm a bigay. Fuck exclusionists.

Edit: I think I'm just like every label besides wlw/lesbian, I'm gay, bi, pan, EVERYTHING

Edit 2: Okay nvm guys 💀 Charlie, one of my alters is a transbian and I'm transgay so collectively we're a lesboy, turigirl, gaybian and literally every other orientation

Edit 3: Okay I figured it out, I'm omnibi gay (as in general bi gay) and an omnibi gay man

Edit 4: I'm just every sexuality besides wlw/lesbian labels and I'm also multivelfluid

Edit 5: nvm I lied I'm just bigay

Edit 6: I'm such a fucking liar I'm actual bigay, abrogay and pomogay

[apollos-boyfriend]

can you explain bi gay as an identity? i've only heard ppl argue against it but not what it is

also yeah google is free but it just gave me basic lgbt vocab lists sadly

yes i can!

mspec (which stands for multi spectrum attraction, such as bi, pan, etc) lesbians/gays can identify as such for many reasons. there’s not one catch-all way to succinctly sum up why someone might identity with those labels, but here’s some common reasons:

they’re following the split-attraction model (ex. someone who’s homosexual but biromantic)

they’re attracted to/in a relationship with someone who is multigender

they identify as abrosexual/abromantic and have a fluid sexuality

they’re using it to emphasize their orientation (ex. being bisexual, but being more primarily focused on same-gender attraction).

reclaiming the historical usage of the term “lesbian”

i, personally, identify as bi-gay because while i am very much attracted to both men and women, i cannot currently envision myself in a relationship with a woman. i’m far more comfortable describing myself as gay, so i mesh the two together as a way to paint a fuller picture/capture both sides of my attraction ^_^

focusing on that last point of the list, which i feel is the most important, lesbian did not always mean someone who is only attracted to women! up until the 1970’s, lesbian solely meant a woman who was in a relationship with another woman, regardless of their sexuality. in the 70’s, however, radical feminists pushed for lesbian separatism, which pushed many bisexual women from their own communities because they “weren’t enough” or were “traitors to their own community” for sleeping with men. it’s also of note to mention that, because this was a push by radical feminists, it also pushed out many trans women, as well, (and if i recall, women of color) and the push against bi-lesbianism is still rooted in terf ideology to this day, if not outright pushes it. this carrd has a lot of good sources if you’d like to do some further digging into the matter yourself, but that’s the basic gist of things!