#ohhhh boy here we go

[tacitusauxilium]

@oraclememehacker sent:

[Text to: Fuuka]

Futaba: I think it's time for us to talk. About a lot of things. Futaba: If you don't want to, I understand. Futaba: But I'm ready now...I think it's been long enough.

She was not expecting Futaba's message out of the blue. Fuuka was just looking up what the weather was going to be like and before seeing what today's weather had in store for her, Futaba's messages came up one by one--and it made Fuuka freeze up. She re-read the messages a few times, knowing it had been months since she last saw the red-headed navigator.

And Fuuka felt sick to her stomach once again. Fuuka thought she was going to be able to get over this. Unfortunately, that was not the case. Fuuka did not know how to respond at first. She left her on read for a few minutes as she let out a heavy sigh.

"...I should have tried to talk to her sooner. ... ...no. That would not have worked out." Fuuka looked at the small scar on her hand and began her small reply to Futaba.

<txt sent>: Give me the time and place, Futaba. <txt sent>: I'll free up my time for you.

[verm1c1de]

anyways, i spent all night classpecting them. i am the most right about efurrything efur

[nomsfaultau]

Bro I just started reading your fic like three days ago and I’m already on chapter 14 BUT BRO THIS SHITS CRAZY ITS SO FUCKING GOOD YOUR TECHNO CHARACTERIZATION IS MAGNIFICENT

I love how everyone is trauma trauma mental health disaster angst and then Techno “voices in he head” Blade is out chilling with his inner demons. The Foundation tried to get to him and he was like ‘bruh thanks for the offer but I’m good’

He’s so wonderfully comfortable with himself and his flaws. Well I mean he’s an awkward dork, but still. Of course he’s downplaying his own trauma since that’s how he rolls, but overall he’s having an alright time while causing huge problems for everyone else lol

Shows up 150k words late to the fic in the middle of a disaster with a potato smoothie:

“Hullo did I miss anything?”

[robbed-ghost]

“Damian isn’t ooc what are you talking aboutttt he’s only 14 and wants to trust his dad so badlyyyy guyssss don’t get upsettt” have you never read a comic with Damian in it in your life

[syn4k]

[snively-mun]

[belladonnaprice]

.

[kingdomoftyto]

Hey so IwtV is back for season 2 and we're feeling Really Super Normal about it already

[southislandwren]

ALRIGHT I’m home now and I also called my mom and my dad was listening in too. Anyway my dad says that that line about going from there is him being like. Into the idea and not just agreeing to hanging out because I’m asking. And my friends were like WOOOHOOOOO but idk man I am so stressed out I don’t want to fuck this up 😭

edited to add (so i dont spam posts tonight) i think on saturday i'll wear my normal clothes and hat but i'll keep my hair down. hes seen me without a hat on briefly (via fieldtrips and wearing hardhats, and at work, but that's with my hair in a bun and a hairnet on) but hes never seen my hair like. Down. and i want saturday to be like subtly special. not like knock his socks off special but yknow. a little more vulnerable than jeans and a sweatshirt

[hoshigray]

iillly happy bday bbgggg pls BULLY SATORUUUUU pleasepleaseoHFGOSH

𝐚. 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞: THANK YOU AND BET !!

⊹ 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐬: Gojo x fem! reader - explicit content; minors DNI - modern au! college setting; you + satoru are juniors - sex in a public space; library study room - breast fondling + nipple play - sex on a table - overstimulation - pet names (crybaby, cutie, pretty girl) - clitoral play (pinching and swiping) - unprotected sex (psa: wrap that shit up, kiddos ) - mention of cervix and tears.

⊹ 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 1.1k

“Ahhaaa! Thhh, shtopp! T’oo fast…!!”

“Yeah, goin’ too fast? Hnnmm, shit…tell that to your hips.”

This is not how this day was supposed to go, but that’s what having a bully in your life is like, right?

Today was one of those days where you’d spend most of your leisure time studying and catching up on upcoming coursework before the weekend, savoring your free days to rest and do some light reading for Monday. So here you were, spending the Thursday evening at the library in a study room you reserved until closing time. Fingers are typing away on your keyboard, putting words to your Word document while taking pieces of your french fries to munch—your study snack from the dining hall. 

And everything was going swimmingly, feeling the groove of things operate accordingly while bumping to your music.

Until your eyes snap to the door opening, and they widen at the sight of the culprit. Snow white hair and round glasses, and your stomach drops. “G-Gojo?”

“Yo!” He chips with a smirk, stepping inside and closing the door with his heel. You could’ve sworn you locked that door, but you’re sure it is now after he does it for you. “I knew I saw you walking out from the dining hall; the nerd is all cooped up in the library. Whatcha up to?”

“I, umm,” your gaze moves to your Word document, not wanting to see Gojo walk to where you’re sitting at the rectangle table. “J-Just, getting ready for a group seminar tomorrow…Need my notes ready.”

The tall boy slides his backpack off and drops it to the chair on the side of the table. His closing the door blinds and striding back to you grows the unsettling feeling in your tummy. “Ehhh, notes? Must be bored.”

“Not really…” It’s challenging to channel your focus on something productive when you watch from your peripheral with every step he takes until he’s behind you. “Just need to answer four more questions, and then I’ll,” your body rigid when he places his hands on your shoulders—there’s no escape now. “…I’ll be done.”

“Mmmm,” he hums and puts his chin to your head. “Working so hard, huh?” He kneads your shoulders and travels down to your arms. “I think it’s about time you give yourself a break.”

“Gojo, please,” pleads teeter out your mouth, yet your futile attempt to stand is refuted.

“Whaaat? You gotta give yourself breaks, right?” He moves his face to your shoulder to whine. “Can’t help a friend relax for a bit from studying?”

You open your mouth to respond, but words don’t leave your lips—a moan is snuck out from his hands, finding your chest. Sneaking inside your shirt to cup and soft mounds behind your bra. “Nnnn, n-no, we can’t…not here—“

“Psshh, you’re no fun, baby,” he coos to your ear, tweaking a nipple for you to squeak. “It won’t be for long, promise. Besides,” you turn to him, his blue orbs seen better from the dark shades now that you’re closer. “No one knows better to care for you than me, right? C’mon, just five minutes, and I’ll go, ‘kay?”

Your stomach has not stopped contorting knots ever since you saw that door open, and now you’re in a dilemma you prayed wouldn’t happen today. Regardless, you only have to give him what he wants, and you can return to work. So, you swallow your pride and kiss him on his soft lips. 

“—Ohhhh, y-you said for fi—Iiiive minutes…!!”

“Hahhh, did I say that? Heh, must be bad with time.”

Deliberately making a supposed five-minute break turn into nearly thirty minutes isn’t terrible with time—just plain ignorant. 

Your laptop, course material, and Gojo’s shades are pushed further into the table, substituting them with your figure to be laid on the edge of the table surface. Your bottoms and panties were stripped to the ground with Gojo’s jeans, your sexes exposed and now joined in the union as he propels his hips to pound into your chasm. Your cunt was a mess, slick, and come mixed and collecting in a soapy ring with the back-and-forth motions of your junior bully. 

The walls of the library rooms aren’t the best, nearly paper-thin to hear convos from one room to the other. You bite your lips to try to conceal your cries, but the curve of Gojo’s dick poking your walls have you screaming silently. “Fuck, pretty girl,” he intentionally grinds his pelvis to your folds, the broken wails egging him on to tease you more. “Scared someone will come and find us, huh? Scardey-cat,” the hands to your wrists pull you in with every rut. 

“Gaaahh, Gojooohhh,” your brows sewn together after the stimulation of your G-spot is hit yet again. “I’m sens’tiveee, go sloooww!”

“Shiiiit, that’s kinda hard when you’re clenching me so hard,” he hisses with a sigh. “Pretty much asking for me to mess you up.”

You shake your head at the brush of his tip hitting your cervix. “Ahaaaa, ohhJesus,” tears well up in your eyes with another jab to your womb.

“Oh, is the lil’ nerd about to cry?” Gojo bends down to you while his hips keep working, his flushed face inches closer to yours, and he wipes a tear with a thumb. “Awww, don’t do that; don’t want people next door to see what’s up with you.” His thumb enters your mouth, your tongue tasting your salty tear.

You sob on his digit, licking his thumb, and more twitches of your vagina come from more grazes on your inner texture. “Nhhooh, ahhhmyGod, good, feels tew goood…!”

Gojo can feel it; you’re clasping onto his length way too much not to notice. He snickers, “Gonna cum, baby?” You nod hurriedly, and he brings his forehead onto yours. “Want me to help you with that?” Too enraptured that you don’t notice him sneaking his hand to your lower half and a pinch to your clitoris has you cry. “Shhh, shhh,” he coaxes to your ear, his thumb swiping on the bud as you sob in parts. “Go ahead, wring me out, you slutty crybaby.”

Another pinch, and you’re contracting around him hard. Your orgasm hits you right there, the hot feeling of your body is washed with a sharp cold that rattles your legs. Hands come and grip the back of Gojo’s long sleeve, your cunt flitting on him as your body jolts from pleasure.

Gojo hurries to pull out and stroke his cock, his seed spilling out to paint your messy slit with the come oozing out from your hole. He throws his head back in bliss. “Shit, that felt good.”

“I,” you are stuck in a daze, yet you try to communicate. “I have to…get back to studyinng.”

“You still have some of those pills from last time?” You nod slowly as he brings his briefs and jeans back on. “Good! Be right back; gonna get some wipes from the restroom.” He then leaves and closes the door on his way out, leaving you cold and helpless on the table surface.

And now you know. Note to self: lock the door whenever you study at the library.

© 𝐇𝐨𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐠𝐫𝐚𝐲2024 – reblogs and comments are appreciated wholeheartedly ✩ dividers by @/animatedglittergraphics-n-more.

[boiohboii]

What's a soft launch? (Lando Norris x Leclerc! Reader)

YN Leclerc is dating Lando Norris in secret, and they had been keeping it really quite for the past 9 months, but unfortunately she is dating an idiot who forgot to close his stream.

or

in which YN Leclerc and Lando Norris make everyone watching his stream need to bleach their eyes.

N.B: this is something for fun and has no relation to real life people. Also, I'll be doing a sm fic based on this cause a meme picture is what started this for me.

WARNING: suggestive, no actual smut. Making out. PDA cause lando forgot to close his stream. Mentions of breast, nipple and bra. French not used properly?... if i missed anything else let me know!

Sighing, Lando stretched his back while calling for his girlfriend- letting her know that it's okay to come in.

"Hey handsome."

username: is that who I think it is!

username: ARIANA WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE

username: someone call 911 lando no rizz pulled YN Leclerc

username: I want yn to call me handsome too

Unaware of the fast chat the couple smiled at each other as YN sat on Lando's lap, wrapping her arms around his shoulders, wrists staying still at the nape of his neck while her fingers play with the soft curls of his hair.

"Hello ma chérie."

And that's all the older boy got to say as the young girl latched her lips onto his, tightening her grip around his neck while his arms rest at her hips, squeezing them as he lifts her up a bit trying to reach as much of her as possible.

username: AY YOOOOOO someone tell my man he is live and we can see that

username: THE GRIP HE HAS ON MY GIRL

username: ooofffff, Lando's funeral is gonna be tomorrow my dudes

username: F in the chat for lando

username: F in the chat for charles, he having a heart attack rn

username: my girl gonna wake up with bruises

Breaking away to catch their breath Lando's hand caressed her hips, moving until they rested on her ass

"Ohhhh, okay, are we going there."

"I don't know gorgeous, are we?"

Shifting around in the chair, Lano placed his back to the arm of the chair moving YN in front of him- unknowingly, making the viewers have a perfect view of their interlocking lips which were quickly followed by a gasp from YN as Lando pressed his hips into hers- thus allowing a perfect entrance of his tongue into her mouth.

username: OKAY THIS IS A FULL MAKE OUT SESSION.

username: LANDO IS DYING AT 25 MY DUDES

username: FFS SOMEONE CALL THEM OR SEND A SUB OR SOMETHING, WE DON'T WANT LANDO TO DIE

username: Holy shit, YN have mercy on your brothers

username: how to be Lando rn

username: THIS FEELS SO WRONG, THEY LITERALY HAVE THEIR TONGUES DOWN EACH OTHER'S THROATS

username: please lord, let Lando still be able to have kids after seeing the Leclerc brothers

Being interrupted by her ringtone did not deter the couple from their steamy activity, in fact it was like they didn't even hear it as Lando's right hand slipped into the girl's shirt roaming around her stomach as it rested in her breast.

Another ringtone...... Lando's left hand made its way to her bra's clasp, opening it with swiftness that made it evident it had not been the first time he had done that.

The way their tongues moved and their arms explored places they were already familiar with only comes with expirence. A lot of experience.

As the ringtone got repeated for the third time, Lando decided to slow down, removing his lips from hers while his right hand pushed her bra downward a bit, making him feel her hard nipple under his fingertips.

Moving her left arm from around his neck while balancing herself with her right arm, YN reached into her back pocket getting her phone out.

"Oh, it's Danny"

The cheerful voice of the girl filles the room

username: of thank god!

username: FINALLY

username: Lando, you will be missed

username: this has been the hottest thing I have ever seen in my life

username: I wasn't even doing anything and I'm out of breath

Answering the phone YN couldn't even get a word out before Daniel is screaming into her ear

"IT'S LIVE! YOU'RE FUCKING LIVE."

Snapping her head towards her boyfriend's set up, she quickly balanced the phone in between her ear and her shoulder while removing his hand from under her shirt, tipping as she attempted to close the live while holding her bra in place as much as possible.

"What? What's wrong?" Upon seeing his girlfriend's frantic behaviour Lando became alert, worried something might be wrong.

"YOU DIDN'T CLOSE THE LIVE!"

"WHAT!!"

In a hurry to get up from his position and close the stream he tripped over his own feet just as his hands reached the desk, and as an attempt to save himself from the fall he gripped the first thing within his reach- his keyboard and his mic- making them fall right on his head.

The sudden scream of Lando's and the quite comical fall (in YN's opinion) made her forget about the older man on her phone and about the entire issue. The only thing she did was double over in laughter that within seconds turned into a sound similar to that of a car's windshield wiper.

"Oh, I'm glad my pain is amusing you."

username: this is the best stream of my entire fucking life man

username: I have no idea what is going on, but I love it

username: this is hilarious.

SOCIAL MEDIA REACTIONS

THE BROTHERS' REACTIONS

THE FAMILY DINNER

[i-care-4u]

the boy is mine ✹ carlos sainz

SOCIAL MEDIA AU

PAIR: CARLOS SAINZ X SINGER!READER

FACECLAIM: ARIANA GRANDE [she/her]

REQUESTS ARE CLOSED | MASTERLIST

A/N: okay but penn and ariana in that video 😍😍😍 anyway i’m back with my social media aus

→ INSTAGRAM

yourusername via instagram stories

yourusername

Liked by chappellroan, sabrinacarpenter, lizgillz, and 3,490,042 others

View all 55 comments

honeymoonavenue oh that boy is definitely yours

yourfanbase.wildin DIV-I-I-I-INE

sabrinacarpenter cutie

anyataylorjoy my true lover

brandy 🤍🤍🤍

lizgillz she's taking it alright

user1 WHO IS THE GUY

user2 nonstop serving

user3 how many words are in sunshine

↳ user4 user3 ATEEEEEE

Comments on this post have been limited.

→ TWITTER

→ INSTAGRAM

f1

Liked by anyataylorjoy, k.mbappe, yourusername, and 2,130,929 others

f1 Monaco always brings the stars out 🤩

#F1 #Formula1 #MonacoGP

View all 4,250 comments

ynfanburner SO WHO IS ACTUALLY THE MAN Y/N?

↳ user1 ynfanburner you guys are investigating this as if she got a baby daddy 😭

ynnation y/n, nicholas galitzine, and carlos sainz in the same place??? ohhhh something is telling me that it’s either one of them

user2 MBAPPE 🤩🤩🤩

user3 got to love anya ❤️❤️❤️

brighterdaysln oh miss y/n is in monaco, which means business

itookasampleofynsfragrance CARLOS SAINZ IS IN THE MUSIC VIDEO

thankuln now we’re getting closer to seeing him making that cameo

↳ user4 thankuln and these people be the same ones that called us delusional 😔 look at us now

user5 here for monaco gp ❌ here to see y/n and sainz ✅

f1

Liked by charles_leclerc, carlossainz55, scuderiaferrari, and 540,030 others

f1 Their victory is div-i-i-i-ine ❤️

#F1 #Formula1 #MonacoGP

View all 572 comments

ordinarythings did they just quoted y/n?

↳ honeyisneedy ordinarythings carlos sainz in the boy is mine music video? i think yeah

f1forever best duo! ❤️

ferraribabe i’m going to miss csquared soon

etrnlsnshne no way the f1 account admin just spoiled the surprise for us y/n fans

user1 my boys won!!!

user2 i’m so proud of leclerc, home victory! ❤️🍾

user3 it’s been a long time coming ❤️🤍

slightlytruestory i’m living for the y/n lyric

↳ obviousssss slightlytruestory carlos sainz as the man propaganda is working and i love it

ynlnupdates

Liked by ytferrari, tunyn, lnismylight, and 103,030 others

ynlnupdates Y/n L/n spotted with Carlos Sainz after celebrating his victory at the Monaco Grand Prix, May 26, 2024.

View all 204 comments

lnhoney i don’t even watch formula one, but what happened?

↳ vanillayn lnhoney it is rumoured that carlos sainz will be the leading man in her next music video

user1 now i need to see him in that video and i can live in peace

ynsangels in the words of hannah montana, i got the best of both worlds

user2 IM SCREAMING OMG

→ YOUTUBE

→ INSTAGRAM

carlossainz55 via instagram stories

carlossainz55

Liked by yourusername, charles_leclerc, landonorris, and 1,293,029 others

carlossainz55 The boy may be yours but the pleasure was all mine yourusername thank you for inviting me into your orbit for a moment & christhedirector for building a little world to play. Hey ma I’m in a music video! And in the presence of brandy and monicadenise ?? Honored to be alongside these icons ❤️❤️

View all 6,920 comments

yourusername this is a dream come true to me! once again, i’m so honored to meet you. 🤍

*Liked by carlossainz55

sweetenernsour i was supposed to be in the music video (i wasn’t)

sain55 BRO IS LOOKING A LITTLE TOO GOOD

user1 whatever y/n is feeding this man, it’s working cause he’s so fine 😍😍😍

↳ leclercspassengerprincess user1 go clock in and go watch some f1! you’ll love it i promise 😄

whatthesainz bisexuals won today!

https.ferrari IM SO JEALOUS OF BOTH OF YOU

user2 real question is…who’s the smooth operator here?

hamiltonsbabe CARLOS WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE QUEEN 😂

carlandoo we got y/n and carlos sainz collab before gta 6

[emptyjunior]

Can I say how much I love how Ouran High School handles the rich boy/poor girl in love trope. 

Like I absolutely believe it’s discussions about classism and elitism to this Day still hold up! 

I will admit there is so much weird stuff in ouran😭, but we see the Handsome ‘Unlimited Money’ Male Lead a LOT in anime and I feel ouran gets a lot of points of the characterisation SO right, that a lot of other shows just don’t! 

Ouran does the whole love story/harem/all the boys want brown hair girl that we project on, trope. Like they do that, but they show that at the foundation, the root of all of it, those rich boys are JEALOUS. They aren’t approaching Haruhi with the need to protect and own her, at their core the rich are envious of her! Even though they have everything, they want what she has! 

Like we see in the real world with how the rich cosplay as poor! And say "ohhhh I'm so broke please venmo me for lunch" and wear their ripped jeans and strained sweaters and take pictures at the met gala with a box of McDonalds fries in their hand. 

The classist comments made towards Haruhi ARE comedic relief, but the joke isn’t on characters like Haruhi, the joke is on THEM. 

They are the ones who can’t do anything! They are the ones who are stilted and emotionally closed off! They are the ones who can’t make an instant coffee or go to a mall without help! 

THAT is why Haruhi is the center of this harem, why she is the one they’re chasing. They are jealous of her insight and world experience from living independently, from living a REAL life. That is her enviable trait. Haruhi GETS people! And they don’t. Their wealth has isolated them and now there is a barrier between these characters and the rest of the world and they have no idea how to navigate it. 

And this is the foundation of 90% of the problems/conflict in the show! 

The holiday ep when Hikaru has feelings because Haruhi reconnects with Nice Guy Arai? Hikaru says he doesn’t like this guy for all these reasons and most of them are like ‘he’s just some nobody from nothing who only knows Haruhi cause they went to some stupid public school together’. Like okay? Haruhi has all of those ‘bad traits’ as well but you still seem to like her?  

Because it’s not about that, it’s never about that, it’s not even about the love rival/romance angle (at least not completely).  

Hikaru is scared and embarrassed! He already was when they got there, when these rich boys crashed Haruhi’s summer to find out she is an employee here and she is working with her own two hands. This is not a break for her! And then he’s so worried when Haruhi and Arai find each other because what they have is so untouchable to him. Same background, same class, they can meet each other’s needs! And know the other's needs! And this is a chasm that Hikaru has no idea how to cross so he starts lashing out. 

And that episode concludes with Hikaru being told about Haruhi’s fear of thunderstorms, finally actually listening and empathizing with what that means, and then going to her and giving her the stuff she needs to deal with that problem (blanket, headphones, support, protection etc.). 

He has to LEARN that none of those poor people inherently know all this secret knowledge! They just care and ask each other stuff! You can ask Haruhi what she's afraid of and then help her with that! It was always this simple! Just because you’re not the same class as her and knowing her isn’t as easy as it is with people the same as you, doesn’t mean you’ll never know! Learn! Listen! Keep trying! 

Ouran shows their rich characters being hurt by their wealth. Their elitists mindset does NOT benefit them and they’re only narratively rewarded when they break out of it, THAT’S why the arcs are so good. 

(And also while we’re here, I LOVE when they do eps that show Tamaki’s character is actually a parallel of Haruhi’s. Tamaki grew up as an illegitimate child, hidden away in France with his mother. He knows what it is to not be at the top of the food chain, and he learns the skills to keep living! Tamaki is a survivor in a world run by a man who was ashamed of him and did not want him. That can destroy a child, but Tamaki doesn’t let it. He learns how to work people and he learns that belief in yourself is the most powerful asset someone can have. And this is the life experience he imparts onto Kyoya and this SAVES Kyoya, who was barreling towards a black pit of despair and chasing his father’s shadow. The ‘poor’ characters of this show have power that the rich people desperately desire, and in the end they learn that it’s not something you take it’s something you build for yourself.) 

[alexiroflife]

"fortunes"

crack, fluff, ft: first years

satoru gojo x reader

Synopsis: satoru walks in on you showing his students a paper fortune teller

to sum it up: no productivity occurs when you, satoru, and the students are together

WC: 1,489

Warning(s): none

“Where the hell are my students?” Satoru mumbles to himself when he makes his way to the training field and finds it completely empty. He raises a hand to his hip in thought. He thinks he told them to meet here, but not even Yuji is anywhere to be found. 

Strange.

He imagines he’s going to hear a mouthful and then some if Yaga somehow finds out about this, so the sorcerer searches everywhere for his kids; the gym, the dorms, classrooms, but still nothing. 

With his mind now completely riddled with confusion, he texts Megumi on his way to his office and, not shockingly, receives no reply. Gojo isn’t terribly shocked or worried, but a heads up if they decided to skip today would have been nice.

He throws open his office door with his face stuck in his phone when he looks up and finally locates all three of his missing students within his space. Satoru is surprised when he sees the kids crowding around your figure, which sits in his desk chair hunched over with a folded paper fortune teller in your hands. 

Itadori and Nobara lean in closer, engaged with the activity as Nobara demands to know if the fortune says anything about her becoming a model in the near future, while Itadori talks over her to beg you to do his fortune for the twentieth time. Megumi sits nearby and watches calmly.

When Satoru’s presence is made known, the four of you turn and look up at him, momentarily falling silent. You smile brightly when you see him. “Hi, Satoru! Sorry, I forgot to tell you I was visiting today.”

The white haired professor tucks his phone back into his pocket with a grin. “Baby!” he exclaims, sauntering over to you to lean down and kiss your cheek lovingly. “Stealing my students from me, I see,” he says smugly, rubbing your cheek softly with his thumb.

“She wouldn’t have had to if you weren’t twenty minutes late,” Fushiguro chimes in tiredly, and Satoru shrugs bashfully when you toss him a knowing look. 

“What can I say? I’m a busy man.”

“Gojo!” Itadori exclaims, rushing to stand from his previous “criss-cross” position on the floor at your feet. “Your wife was just showing us this cool game she said you used to play! Look, the paper shows you your future,” the pink haired teen points to the dome-shaped object clutched over your fingers and you beam, opening it back and forth proudly. 

“Ohhhh, I remember those!” Satoru exclaims quietly yet excitedly as he rests his hand on the back of his chair behind you, leaning over you to take a closer look. 

“I thought it’d be fun to show them while they waited since they’ve never made one before,” you say, handing the fortune teller to Satoru.

“And Yuji’s been hogging it this whole time,” Nobara crosses her arms and glares at the said boy angrily. “You had your fortune read at least fourteen times already.”

“Because I have to make sure I get the most accurate results!” he fumes, and the two start bickering once more.

“Man, we used to make these things all the time,” Satoru marvels. “It’s actually thanks to these fortune tellers that (Y/n) and I are even together now.”

The kids freeze, looking over at Satoru inquisitively. “Huh?” Nobara and Yuji unify, while you roll your eyes and Megumi tries to shrink away from the conversation completely, sensing incoming bullshit from a mile away. 

“Satoru, stop telling that lie,” you exhale and he looks down at you with a smirk.

“What? It’s true!” he swears.

“So it really works?” Itadori gasps, turning to his sensei with glittering eyes. Satoru only nods with a wide smile, holding up the paper in his grasp.

“Mhm. We were here at Jujutsu High, just about your age, and I had the fattest crush on the prettiest girl in school,” the blindfolded man reminisces and you groan to yourself, flushing and turning away. “We were all in a big friend group, so one day we all decided that we’d make some fortune tellers like we did when we were kids- you know, just for the fun of it. I filled one with a message saying ‘you will marry (Y/n) (L/n)’ and the rest was history.”

Nobara stares at him as if he is ridiculous, squinting her eyes and curling her lips while Yuji absorbs the entire story believingly.. “Wait… aren’t the fortunes random though? Wouldn’t that just mean that a bunch of other people got the same message that you wrote at one point?”

“And you wrote the fortune yourself,” Megumi adds. “I don’t think fortunes are supposed to work like that.”

“Well, sure, if you wanna get all technical, but it worked, didn’t it?” he beams, tossing the paper to Yuji and craning over to gather your cheeks in his hands adoringly, bringing your face to squish against his. “Now (Y/n) and I are happily married,” he coos, Nobara and Megumi practically gagging while Itadori blushes happily at the sentiment.

You grip Satoru’s wrists as he squeezes your cheeks, pouting when he presses another loud kiss to your temple. “Satoru, please, you’re gonna scare off the kids.”

“Mrs. Gojo! Make me one that says I’ll meet Megan Thee Stallion one day,” Yuji exclaims passionately, heart set on the notion that these fortunes are meant to breathe truth into manifestation.

“You pervert! Megan would never have the time to even think about meeting you,” Nobara argues.

“Not if it’s put into a fortune! You know what, I’ll do it myself!” he rushes around the office to find a new sheet of paper and slams it onto the floor, laying on his stomach to pour his intense focus into crafting a new fortune teller the way you showed them.

“If you’re gonna just write whatever you want, then put a message in there that says I’ll get famous,” she crouches beside him, and Yuji immediately shields her from his work with his forearm.

“No, go make your own! I don’t need your juju rubbing off on me and ruining my fortune’s accuracy.”

“That doesn’t even make sense!”

“I don’t care, just don’t touch mine!”

“Will you idiots shut up?” Megumi hisses, moving to stand over them as they bicker. “It’s a piece of damn paper for kids. Give it a rest already.”

The two on the floor turn to glare boredly at the Fushiguro, putting their feud on hold to ridicule him. “And that attitude right there, Megumi, is why your fortune will tell you that you’ll end up alone with forty cats in twenty years,” Itadori deadpans and Nobara nods enthusiastically.

Megumi grits his teeth and punches the top of Itadori’s head, the boy ducking and clutching his dome. “Like hell I will! I hate cats!”

“Then why don’t you be a little more positive, hm?” Nobara grins evilly, leading Megumi to tighten his fists.

“Give me that damn piece of paper,” he demands, reaching down for Yuji’s when the said boy yells and throws his body over his sheet to keep his friends away.

Gojo chuckles, watching the scene unfold as he pulls away slowly from you, rubbing your back gently. You shake your head with a small smile, gazing up at your husband. “You started this,” you accuse, to which he laughs.

“How could I possibly have when you’re the one who showed them the fortune teller?”

“Only because you were late to training,” you raise a brow.

He gives in. “Fair enough.”

“You think they’ll make it to training today?”

“Mmmm,” Satoru thinks for a moment, watching his students fight to write their own little desires on a paper that holds no further power outside of your own conviction. “Nah. I'll give them the day. They’ve been working hard.”

You smile. “Okay,” you nod. “Just don’t let Yaga know about this.”

“If you promise to keep it a secret, we won’t have anything to worry about,” the white haired man says suavely, ducking down to meet your eyes. Though his blindfold serves as a barrier, you can feel his gaze soaking you in. 

You click your teeth with a playful smile. “Fine,” you say, and his grin widens, lips meeting yours swiftly with his hand pressed to his desk and the other still gripping the back of your seat. He kisses you once more on the corner of your mouth then pushes himself up, turning his focus back to his students.

“Alright, guys, whoever makes the most fortune tellers in the next five minutes gets to pick the place to eat tomorrow after the mission!”

You watch as further chaos ensues, papers flying and arguments rising, Satoru standing blissfully in the midst of it all. You sigh once more and prop your chin in your hand, pondering over how Satoru gets away with this behavior as a teacher so often.

[slayfics]

You know how you did You get caught trying to sneak into Katsuki’s room. Can you do a reverse one? Like, one where the guys get caught sneaking into the readers room? I feel like it be a chaotic mess and super funny lol 😂

Katsuki gets caught sneaking into your room.

Chapter links

Chapter Two

"Man, are you sure we won't get caught?" Eijiro said, following Katsuki reluctantly to the girl's side of the dorms.

"We will if you keep complaining so loud shitty hair!" Katsuki barked back at him.

"Sorry, I'm just nervous, you know?" Eijiro said in a much quieter voice.

"It's fine, trust me," Katsuki reassured his friend. "Besides, they both miserably failed and got caught by Iida last time so- it has to be us to sneak over this time," Katsuki explained as he hit the button for the girl's elevator.

Eijiro laughed at the thought of the girls getting scolded by Iida for trying to sneak into the boy's dorms, "It makes it easier that both of our girls are on the same floor, hu?" Eijiro said, smiling at his friend.

"I guess. It doesn't matter either way. We're not going to get caught like they did!" Finally, the elevator dinged open. However, to Katsuki's and Eijiro's surprise, it was not empty.

"Oh, um- hi," Shoto greeted the two boys, surprised to see them waiting for the girl's elevator.

"The hell are you doing here, Icy Hot?!" Katsuki asked.

"I'm just leaving from studying with Yayarozu," he answered.

"Studyinggg~ right," Eijiro said, laughing.

Shoto looked at Eijiro, confused by his statement.

Katsuki let out an annoyed huff, "Well, get out of the damn elevator then," he demanded.

"Oh- actually I forgot to give her back her book so- I was going to go back up," Shoto said, holding and pointing to a book in his hand.

"Well, guess we are all going up then," Eijiro said, cheerfully stepping into the elevator.

"Ugh- fine," Katsuki groaned and stepped in.

"Where are you two going?" Shoto asked as he waited to hear what button to press for everyone.

"None of your damn business!" Katsuki yelled.

At the same time, Eijiro politely said, "Fourth floor please."

"God damn it shitty hair!" Katsuki yelled.

"It's fine- I'm not going to say anything," Shoto said. "But um- what are you two doing up here this late?"

"Studying!" Eijiro answered too hastily, voice filled with anxiety. However, Shoto didn't question the two boys' motives any further.

"The fuck?" Katsuki remarked as the elevator stopped and dinged on the third floor.

"Oh- someone is getting in," Shoto mused.

The three boys stood uncomfortably in the elevator as the doors opened and revealed Denki on the third floor.

"Ohhhh~ hey you guys! What are you all doing here, hmm?" he said, giving the boys a wink.

"Shut the hell up and get in Dunce Face!" Katsuki yelled.

"Why are you acting so weird?" Shoto asked.

Denki just laughed and entered the elevator, then glanced over at the buttons.

"Hmm ok, so the fourth and fifth floor. I think I can guess what rooms everyone's headed to," He teased.

"Hey man, don't make it weird, ok?" Eijiro pleaded.

"What's weird about studying?" Shoto asked.

"Uh," Denki murmured, but before he could make a comment Katsuki intervened.

"Where the hell were you anyway?" Katsuki asked.

"I think it's only Jiro and Hagakure on the third floor, so- my guess is Jiro?" Eijiro said, turning to his friend.

Before Denki could confirm or deny, the elevator opened up to the fourth floor.

"Finally, I can get away from you morons," Katsuki grumbled, but before he could step out, Izuku came from around the corner and crashed into him.

"THE HELL?!" Katsuki hollered.

"Oh! Kacchan! I'm sorry!" Izuku said, apologizing frantically.

"The fuck are you doing here, nerd?!" Katsuki questioned.

"I was just leaving! I was um- studying with Uraraka!" Izuku explained.

Denki laughed, "A lot of 'studying' going on tonight hu?"

"UH- I guess so. Is that why you're all here?" Izuku asked.

"Yep! Just um- about to get started," Eijiro said, laughing nervously and rubbing the back of his neck.

"It's kind of late to just start studying, isn't it?" Izuku asked.

"Yeah, don't you think you guys should get some rest for training tomorrow?" Shoto asked.

"Are they for real right now?" Denki asked, holding in his laughter.

"Tch, probably," Katsuki exclaimed.

"Wait so- you two," Denki said, pointing to Izuku and Shoto, "Were actually studying?"

"What else would we be doing?" Shoto asked plainly.

Before Denki could make any more comments, the boys heard a loud bang followed by-

"Almost there, the forbidden lands~"

"Is it just me or- did that sound like Mineta in the vents?" Denki asked, looking between the boys.

"He never stops, hu?" Izuku said exhaustedly.

"Fucking perv!" Katsuki yelled and stalked over to the vent. "Yeah, that's him in there... Hey! Half and Half, heat up this vent!" Katsuki demanded.

"Won't that hurt him?" Shoto asked.

"Tch- nah it'll just teach him a lesson," Katsuki replied.

"Yeah besides, it's super unmanly to try and spy on girls in their private rooms," Eijiro convinced Todoroki further.

"I suppose you're right," Shoto said as he moved closer to the vent and shot some fire down, heating up the vent red hot in the process.

"OW!" Minoru's scream came ringing out of the vent.

Katsuki, Denki, and Kirishima burst out laughing.

"LAUGH ALL YOU WANT I'M CALLING AIZAWA AND BUSTING YOU GUYS FOR BEING AT THE GIRL'S DORM SO LATE!"

The boys exchanged glances with one another.

"BACK IN THE ELEVATOR GO!" Eijiro yelled, and they all hurried back in fear of being caught by Aizawa.

"Oh, this is bad!" Izuku exclaimed shaking in the back of the elevator.

"Come on Dunce Face! Press the fucking first floor already!" Katsuki yelled.

"I'm rushing, I'm rushing!" Denki said frantically, but as he pressed the button, his anxiety overtook him, causing him to pop off his quirk. A loud buzzing sound went off as the doors closed to the elevator and the lights shut off.

"YOU SHORT CIRCUITED THE ELEVATOR DUMB ASS!" Katsuki yelled.

"OH CRAP!" Denki yelled back in response.

"You guys! We are going to get caught!" Eijiro said, panicked.

Shoto sat in the corner of the elevator calmly.

Izuku panicked, mumbling to himself, "What do you think Aizawa will think? Surly, we were just studying so- that's fine, right? But it is 9pm, he might think that we were up to no good like Mineta bu-"

"SHUT UP NERD!" Katsuki barked.

"Hu, this is worse than the girls getting caught by Iida don't you think, Bakugo?" Eijiro laughed, finding comedy in the situation now.

"I'm going to murder every last one of you," Katsuki grumbled as he sat down on the floor, accepting his fate.

The other boys shrugged and gave in, waiting for their inevitable punishment from Aizawa.

Thank you for requesting a part two! I had a lot of fun with this!

Tags: @unofficialmuilover @maddietries

[theocddiaries]

Alfred: I don't understand. What are we watching? Bruce [Pointing at a camera footage on the TV]: Okay, look. I fell yesterday at the market. Dick and I have been having a little disagreement as to what happened. Just watch. I stop to fix my shoe, and then Dick… Right there. He makes way for this very attractive woman, whom he conveniently leaves out of his retelling of the story. Now, right here, Dick backs up, pushes his butt into the cart, pushes me into the cans. Do you see that? It's all his fault! Just like I said! I was right! Suck it! Cass: When did you get this? Jason: Oh, my God. That's why you wanted to come separately. Steph: You went to all that trouble just to prove you were right? Bruce: It really wasn't that much trouble. I went to the store, found your friend Jordan, the bag boy, who got me the manager. He gave me the address of the off-site security office. I filled out some paperwork. Sally faxed it to corporate. Three minutes later, I'm buying a pack of DVDs and burning a copy. Piece of cake. Tim: …It's like a sickness. Bruce: What? None of you believed me, so I got proof. You should all be sucking it right now. Kate: Please stop with the "sucking it," Bruce. They're children. Clark: Yes, children are very impressionable. You'll never know what they'll pick up. Lois: Ugh! Okay, Clark, I'm sorry that I blamed it all on you, okay? But we both need to look at our actions. I mean, if we're thinking about adopting another baby, then we need to-- Diana: You're adopting another kid? Clark: That's not the way you make an announcement! Banners! Banners! [Puts on music] 🎶Ah, let's give the boy a hand 🎶 Jason: What the hell's happening here? Dick: Is that from Footloose??? Clark [Turns off the music]: Really, Lois? You couldn't even share telling our friends. Kate: Why are you upset? This is such good news. Lois: No, we're a little on edge because Conner has been acting out, like he doesn't want a sibling-- Clark: Yeah, because Lois taught him to hate sharing. Lois: And, or, because Clark wears him like a fanny pack. Alfred: Oh, stop blaming each other. No kid wants a sibling. I remember Bruce hated his cousin so much, he stuck her in a dryer when she was two. Kate: You put me in the dryer? Bruce: …I did. But it wasn't 'cause I hated you. My friend Thomas said that it wouldn't run with a kid inside it, and I knew it would. I was right. Dick: Good governor. It's been going on since you were five? Bruce: …Oh, my God, it is a sickness. What would make me have that need at such a young age? Kate: How long was I in that dryer? Because- I-Is this why I'm afraid of tumbling? I had to quit gymnastics! Dick: A childhood without tumbling?! [Faces Alfred]. You knew this, and just stood by and did nothing? Alfred: Okay, okay. What's done is done. All you can do is learn from your mistakes. And in that spirit, I would like to propose a toast to our young master Damian. This week, he did something he wasn't supposed to do, like we all do-- Diana [Interrupting]: Like we all do!. Cheers, my young warrior! Alfred: No. Not yet. Master Damian stood up like a man. He admitted he was wrong, and he took his licks. And I'm very, very proud of him. Diana: Aaaand now we clink. Alfred: No, we clink when I say we clink. So Master Damian made a mistake, but he didn't take the easy way out. He's got guts. He's got integrity. And as far as I'm concerned, he's the best-- Damian: Okay, stop, stop! I didn't do any of that! Miss Diana broke into the locker and threw the necklace inside, and then we ran away like cowards! I'm sorry, Alfred! I'm sorry! Alfred: Aha! I knew it. I was right! I was right! Everyone: … … [In realization]: Ohhhh. Makes sense. Alfred: … [Drinks in silence].