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ckret2 · 5 months

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Chapter 50 of by this point human Bill Cipher is almost relieved to be imprisoned in the Mystery Shack again: Bill tells Mabel about his adventures, and Ford and Dipper tell Fiddleford about theirs.

But first Bill's gonna die for a bit.

"Guys! You're okay!" Mabel flung her arms around Dipper and squeezed him. "We were worried you were floating around and broke your legs when the gravity came back."

"N—no, we were fine," Dipper said.

Mabel let go of Dipper to hug Ford next—and then drew back, looked him up and down, and looked at Bill. "What happened to your clothes?"

Bill said, "We fell in the lake."

"Ha!"

"Tate was kind enough to loan us dry clothes," Ford said.

"You look like big dorks." She turned to Bill last, took in his dirty haggard appearance, and said, "And you look awful. Where have you guys been the last two days?"

"Thanks for asking! I've been in..." Bill glanced at Stan. "Am I allowed to say the name of the place I've been?"

Stan shook his head. "Not in front of the kids, you don't."

Bill sighed. "Agony. I've been in agony."

"Aww!" She hugged Bill last. "I like your stupid Fishmas sweater."

"Consider it yours as soon as I can change." He wriggled out of her embrace to point at his feet. "Check out the shoes, though!"

Mabel cracked up. "Omigosh, fish slippers! Fi— Fishlers? Fishppers?"

"Fishoes?"

"Fishoes!"

Soos said, "What did happen out there?" He was in the kitchen, cleaning and reorganizing after zero gravity had tossed everything out of order. "Did you heroically save Gravity Falls from imminent multidimensional devastation?"

Ford said, "No. Aside from the effects on gravity, it... turned out to be a benign phenomenon."

"Oh," Soos said. "Like... what Bill said?"

Ford grimaced. He managed to just nod instead of saying afraid so.

Again, he expected Bill to gloat; again, Bill said nothing. He didn't even look at Ford.

"It wasn't an eclipse, though," Dipper muttered, shooting a dark look at Bill. "It would've been an eclipse if it had gotten between us and gravity. It was basically the opposite."

"What do you want from me." The question was more sighed than spoken. "It was called an eclipse when I was growing up, I dunno what to tell you."

Ford, Dipper, and Mabel all looked straight at Bill at the mention of his childhood; but he didn't say anything more. He just trudged to the kitchen and leaned tiredly on the doorframe, watching Soos work. "Grab me something from the fridge."

"Sure thing, dawg." Soos opened the door. "What do you want?"

Bill was silent for a moment. Slowly, like a spirit medium channeling a faint message from the other side, he said, "I think... the body wants a vegetable. Gimme some guacamole."

"Sorry, dude, we had the last of it with dinner."

"Fine. Just give me an avocado and salsa, I'll make do."

"You got it."

"Two avocados."

Soos started rummaging through the jumbled mess in the fridge. "So if everything was okay, what took you guys so long to get back?"

"Yeah, I've been wanting to ask," Stan said. (He hadn't been able to in the car; when everyone realized Bill had passed out as soon as he'd sat down, they'd fallen into an awkward silence.) "Was the demon making trouble or what?"

Dipper and Ford exchanged a glance; who wanted to share the embarrassing news? Ford said, "Actually, under the circumstances, he was... well behaved." Ford resisted the urge to add the modifier "tolerably." It seemed mean-spirited. Bill had constantly complained, sure, but in retrospect could Ford say the complaints were unjustified?

"Then what took you so long?"

Now Ford felt Bill's gaze on him, watching him sharply. Ford understood now. This was why Bill hadn't mentioned saving them. He was holding it in reserve—offering a deal. If Ford and Dipper didn't embarrass him, he wouldn't embarrass them. If they mentioned his breakdown, he could cut in, claim it was natural for him to be in shock after performing such a difficult, heroic deed.

It wasn't blackmail, per se. Revealing the truth wouldn't cost anybody anything but a bit of momentary self-consciousness. But wasn't that just like Bill—only passing up an opportunity to boast so he could use it to shield his ego.

"It was Bill's fault," Dipper said quickly. Ford's heart leaped into his throat. "Because—we had to climb up and down the tunnel to Gravity Peak, and he only brought dress shoes and dumb fish slippers. We kept having to slow down."

Ford felt the pressure of Bill's gaze slide off of his face as he turned away, staring back into the kitchen. Bill said, "Yep. Guess I should have brought my hiking shoes—oh, wait."

Stan said, "You could've got some better shoes when we were at the mall! You're the one who wanted those dumb dress shoes."

"In my defense, I didn't think you paranoiacs would ever let me wander around in the great outdoors—much less force me to." He leaned more heavily against the doorway with a groan, muttering, "My legs are still jelly. Worthless human body."

Dipper glanced at Ford, as if checking with him to see if he'd made the right decision. Ford gave him a tiny nod of approval. After the day they'd had, humiliating Bill just for the sake of humiliation wouldn't have served any justice; it would have just been mean.

For the past three decades, Ford had always felt that Bill deserved the strongest possible punishment, both for his prior atrocities and to prevent future ones; but, he wanted to deal with Bill swiftly and efficiently. No gloating, no torture—just one quick shot. Sure, he got some grim satisfaction from knowing Bill was unhappy—knowing that Bill's vile intentions were being thwarted—and if anyone decided to treat Bill cruelly for cruelty's sake, he couldn't say they were wrong for it... but the thought of committing it himself made him uneasy.

He tried to remember if he'd felt that way when Bill had first arrived.

"I found the salsa!" Soos called from the fridge. "Somehow it all floated onto the highest shelf? Which kind do you want?"

"That one with a picture of a sobbing baby on it."

"Extra spicy it is!"

When Soos handed over the salsa and avocados, Bill said, "Hey, Hick Junior said his father was making announcements about staying inside and low to the ground? You didn't happen to have anything to do with that, did you?"

"Oh—yeah, I called Old Man McGucket and said I had a hot anonymous tip about what was going on," Soos said. "You said it was this whole public safety thing, so I figured the whole town should probably know? He's the local respected science guy now, I thought he'd know what to do with that kind of important information."

Bill grunted. "Terrific, he gets credit for my help. But you'd all be giving me heck if I'd said nothing and half the town broke their necks, so... whatever, net zero. Here." Bill took off the Monster-Mon backpack and swung it over to Soos. "Your reward. Good job."

"Whoa, haha, this is heavy. What's in here, a bag of rocks?"

"No, just one." Bill pushed off the doorway, wheeled unsteadily around, and trudged toward the stairs.

Soos unzipped the bag. A drugged geodite blinked sleepily up at him. He gasped. "Dude! A real Monster-Mon! Is this my call to epic adventure with a lovable animal sidekick?"

Ford grimaced, remembering watching Bill feed a geodite cold medicine. "Ah."

"I think I'll name you... Rocky," Soos said.

"That—really shouldn't be here. Its natural environment is caves, I don't know if it's safe for it to be out here—for it or us." They had been known to bite.

"Aww." Soos cradled the backpack like a swaddled baby. "Do you think it would be okay if I made it a fake cave to live in?" He gasped. "I could make an exhibit for him! I'll say he's a living meteorite! People love aliens."

"I'm not sure that..." Ford sighed. Well, none of them were going back to the cave today. "Maybe you should put it in the cellar where it's darker."

"Great idea!" Soos carried the geodite through the living room. "Hey, I've already got a mattress down there. You're gonna love it, lil dude..."

Ford hoped Soos didn't get attached to that thing. He shot a glower at Bill.

Bill was already on the stairs. "Now everybody leave me alone. Except you." He pointed at Mabel. "I don't want to do anything but lay on the floor and talk about whatever Mabel wants to talk about for the next three hours."

"Cartoons and boy bands."

"Yes," Bill sighed in relief, already preparing to turn 95% of his brain off. "Wow, yes, that's exactly what I want to talk about. I can't wait." He grabbed the handrail as he climbed heavily, leaning against it for balance as he dragged himself upstairs.

Before Mabel could follow him, Ford put a hand on her shoulder. "Oh, before you go—there's something I wanted to tell you and Dipper." Voice low, he said, "You remember when you told me that Bill had mentioned Edward Bishop Bishop?"

"Yeah? When we were drawing our houses."

"Something Bill said while we were out shook a memory loose. It reminded me of a book I read as an undergraduate—Flatworld, written by Edward Bishop Bishop."

"Aww," Mabel said. "Not an artist?"

"No, although he did illustrate the book," Ford said. "It's a novella that combines Victorian social commentary with a primer on higher-dimensional mathematics by using an allegory about sentient shapes living in a two-dimensional world."

"That's what you were talking about in the boat, right?" Dipper asked. "When Bill said something about..." He scrunched his face, trying to remember, "'Up in the sky'...?"

"Upward-but-not-skyward," Ford said, "to describe something that isn't higher than us in the third dimension, but rather, in a higher dimension relative to us."

"How do you know about it?" Dipper asked. "The first time it came up, you said the name Edward Bishop Bishop was familiar, but..."

Ford sighed in irritation, "I read it as an undergraduate—in a haze of sleep-deprived exhaustion just before finals week—to get extra credit in a course on the history of mathematics. I immediately forgot ninety percent of it—which I'm sure is why I never thought of it in relation to Bill. If only I'd remembered the book thirty years ago, when it might have done me some good..."

"It's okay," Mabel said. "I forget almost everything I've read for class basically as soon as I've taken the test. I think it's pretty good that you remember anything about Flatworld at all!"

Ford smiled awkwardly. He was afraid that might say more about Mabel's study habits than about his. "Thank you, Mabel."

"And you did have a lot on your mind thirty years ago," Dipper said. "Like, Bill. Literally. On your mind."

Mabel added, "Doing creepy possession things!"

"I suppose that's true, too." What would he have done if he had remembered the book during that frenetic, delirious period when Bill and Ford had wrestled for control over his body? He'd been in no fit shape to go to the library. "I did think about it a couple of times in the multiverse—when I was visiting Exwhylia, for instance—but at the time I'd brushed it off as a lucky coincidence that I'd read a book that invented a society of shapes. It wouldn't be the first time science fiction predicted science fact. But now that Bill's mentioned it twice, I'd say it's less likely a coincidence and more likely that Edward Bishop Bishop was another of his 'students.'"

"Is there a way for us to find out?" Dipper asked. "If he was Bill's student, would he have left behind any... hints? Coded messages?"

"Like secret society conspiracy things?" Mabel asked.

"Yeah!"

"I suppose it's possible," Ford said. "If Flatworld happens to feature a one-eyed yellow triangle sharing the secrets of the universe, we'll know for sure. But, there's only one way to find out: now that I do remember the book, we can pick up a copy for research."

"That's great," Dipper said. "If Bill told the author about his home dimension... there's no telling how much we can learn about him by reading it."

"So it's basically a math textbook disguised as a story?" Mabel groaned. "That's just like doing word problems! The most confusing kind of math problems. Why does Bill keep making me have homework this summer?"

"You know what he's like," Dipper said, elbowing her with a grin. "Dastardly villain."

"Pure evil."

Ford huffed. "If it helps, as I recall the book teaches you about math concepts, but it doesn't make you do any math."

She let out a longer, more theatrical groan. "Fine. But if there's a cousin Throckmorton I'm throwing the book away."

"I dunno, sounds kinda neat," Dipper said. "It might give me a leg up when we start geometry."

"I don't remember the details of what it covers, but I bet it could," Ford agreed. "I have to visit Fiddleford this evening to return the equipment he loaned us, and... discuss the events of the last couple of days. If the library's still open when we're done I can go by and see if they have a copy of Flatworld."

"Can I come along?" Dipper asked.

"Of course. Just give me a moment to..." He looked down at himself, "change into something a little less ridiculous."

Dipper tried not to laugh. "Okay. I'll wait here. Mabel, do you want to...?"

"No thanks!" She pointed upstairs. "I've got a captive audience to teach about boy bands. I'm going to make him listen to Sev'ral Timez's entire discography."

"He's already had a pretty bad day. Don't torture him even more."

Mabel blew a raspberry. "He'll love it." She bounded up the stairs.

Ford headed to his and Stan's guest room. Dipper took off his backpack, dropped it in the living room, and stuck his hands in his pockets—then pulled one out in surprise.

The enchanted friendship bracelets. They were still in his pocket. Bill hadn't had them on since Dipper's out-of-body experience that morning.

Dipper stared at them uneasily; then hung them in their usual place on the entryway coat rack and resumed waiting for Ford.

####

It was a rare opportunity that Bill was allowed in the kids' room; but with Ford and Dipper out of the house, the one person most likely to complain wasn't around. So after having extracted a strict promise for him to behave himself, Mabel had let him in, for ease of gossip and CD-switching.

But even if Dipper had been in the room, he wouldn't have found much worth complaining about. Once Bill had finished his snack (he'd eaten the avocados like pears, skin and all, and drank down the salsa like a chunky smoothie), he'd laid down on the floor, and since then had remained a dead lump. Face buried in his crossed arms, curled up in the oversized Fishmas sweater and a set of loose stolen-from-Soos sweats to replace the towel skirt, he might as well have been a pile of laundry that had sprouted curly golden hair. Mabel had put Sev'ral Timez's first album on the boombox, sat herself on Bill's back, and started brushing out his damp, knotted curls without asking as she talked about each track.

To her delight, Bill started insisting they skip past the slow, emotional love ballads, saying he preferred the bouncier dancier tracks; she thought the fact that he was displaying a preference rather than begging to turn the band off was a good sign. He was actually listening to the music. Possibly even liking it! Maybe she'd manage to convert him into a fan. She recounted her experiences with the band's cloned members and Bill threw in the polite "Mhm" and "Uh-huh?" where appropriate without lifting his head from the floor or opening his eyes. She'd thought he might have had something to throw in about the cloning thing, that seemed like the kind of conspiracy nonsense he might have a hand in; but if he knew anything, he wasn't up to sharing it.

When she'd wrangled his hair into some semblance of order, she got to work on his fingernails. His arm was like a dead weight in her hands, loose and unresisting but not helping, either. He shifted his head over to rest on his other arm and otherwise didn't move.

"Your fingernail polish is destroyed," Mabel said. On three fingers the paint had been all but completely scraped off. When he'd left a couple of days ago, it had just been lightly chipped. She started stripping the remainder with nail polish remover.

"Is it?" Bill mumbled. "Mmh. Yeah, probably from clawing in the dirt."

"Pfff. What did you do the last couple of days?"

Bill slowly sucked in a breath so deep that Mabel felt his back lift her a little higher off the ground; and then he just as slowly let it back out. "Do not," he said, "get me started."

He got started.

He began with a tirade about the contempt that both Ford and Dipper had shown him and his far superior subject matter expertise for the last two days; and then about being hauled out and exposed during totality after repeating over and over how dangerous it was and how much he would prefer to not do that—Ford had even admitted he'd dragged Bill out into open air just because he knew how much he didn't want that!—and from there Bill looped back to listing a whole litany of gripes against what he perceived as egregious and undeserved disrespect from Ford over the last couple of weeks—"Youmight have lied to me about that glass pyramid, but at least you didn't laugh in my face about it!"

(Mabel thought Ford pretty much had the right to be as disrespectful to Bill as he wanted, after everything Bill had put him through. Lying about a silly imaginary cult was less mean than lying about taking over the universe. But part of being a good friend, she knew well, was lending a sympathetic ear to your friend's venting without suggesting that said friend might be in the wrong. She had a Color Critters episode about being honest with your friends she could show him later.)

Bill seemed to gain strength as he aired his grievances, bolstered by Mabel's encouraging "mhm" "uh-huh" noises. By the time she'd finished repainting his first hand (she'd picked a glittery purple polish she thought would complement all the yellow he wore), he was sitting upright and Mabel had to sit in front of him to start on his other hand.

"—and my stupid feet hurt," Bill griped. "Since Stanford made me traipse halfway through the mountain barefoot because he wouldn't let us go back down before the gravity returned and I don't even own shoes for spelunking. And my knees hurt, and my back hurts, and I could have killed for a walking stick but do think they'd have allowed me one if I asked? Because I don't think so! I tripped over—I don't know, a hundred roots."

"Worst hiking trip ever." Mabel finished painting his second hand, and started looking through her miniature sticker sheets for some fun stickers to put on Bill's first hand now that it was dry.

"Worst in the history of your planet! Even the Donner party had a better hike! At least some of them got something to eat," Bill said. "All I got for two days was a handful of cereal and Stanford's liquid meat in a toothpaste tube."

Mabel stuck out her tongue.

"And Stanford walks too fast. And your brother kept trying to squeeze through gaps between trees I couldn't get through. And Stanford kept fiddling with his—stupid—useless antique Civil War lantern he's so proud of, and he's just lucky that I thought to bring a way to find a light source even though I didn't even need one, because I knew he would bring that stupid Civil War lantern..." Bill's complaints petered out.

And then, voice oddly quiet, he said, "And I saw my corpse."

Mabel looked up from carefully placing a yellow butterfly on Bill's middle fingernail. There was a dark look in his eyes. "Oh," she said. "Oh, Bill. I'm so sorry."

This wasn't just a bad camping trip. This was serious. She had to treat it seriously.

She ejected the current CD from the boombox, put in another Sev'ral Timez album, and skipped to track 4: "This goes out to anyone having a bad day. Ladies, this one's for you. 'Girl, today has been—straight whack. You don't know how you're gonna—bounce back. But any time you're down, I'll always be around; I'll drive your heart back to Happy Town'..." Oh yeah. That was the exact energy Mabel was trying to channel.

"And I didn't feel anything when I touched it." Bill was staring down at his hands like he barely recognized them. "No energy, no connection—nothing. What if there isn't a connection anymore? What if I'm just a human now?"

Did that weigh on Bill? Clearly, enough that he'd decided to endure imprisonment in the Mystery Shack rather than kill his body to see if there was still a triangle inside.

But he'd never talked about it before now; she'd thought maybe he just didn't worry about it.

But that was dumb. Of course he worried about it. He was just like her. When something scared him, he just pushed it down and hoped that if he ignored it enough, everything would be okay! Until he couldn't pretend anymore.

And she'd never heard him sound this scared before.

She took his hands and hoped that would help.

He squeezed her hands so hard it hurt. His still-wet nail polish smeared on her hand. "What if I'm really gonna grow old and die in this rotting meat doll, what if I never go home again—? There's so much I haven't done, I was going to throw an eternal party, it would have been beautiful, everyone would have loved me, but now— and now—" He let out a choked noise, head bowing over their joined hands, posture broken. Hot tears landed on the backs of Mabel's hands. "And I didn't even get to, just, die and be done with it, I have to know I'm dead, I have to know everything I was going to do..."

"Hey—come here." Mabel tentatively wrapped her arms around Bill's neck and shoulders, compressing his bouncy curls. She half expected him to pull away.

Instead, he buried his face against her shoulder and hugged her back like she was the only thing keeping him from drowning.

After spending the last two days suppressing his grief and fear so hard his body couldn't function through it—after spending over a month suppressing his grief and fear—finally, finally, he peeled the tape off his cracked shell to let it leak out. He couldn't hold it together anymore. He'd barely put himself back together long enough to get on his feet and make it to the shack. This was the only place it was safe to fall apart. He muffled his sobs in Mabel's sweater.

And Mabel—who was used to being comforted by adults but who had never been called upon herself to comfort anybody but her brother and the occasional friend—had no idea how she was supposed to comfort a zillion-year-old almost-definitely-adult alien through an existential crisis.

Not for the first time, she wondered whether she might have gotten in over her head.

She pushed the worry down. Everything would be okay. Bill needed her—she could feel him trembling—and he didn't have anybody else in the world he could trust. And if she didn't know what else to do, at the least she could keep hugging him.

Voice so tight it almost squeezed out as a whisper, Bill said, "I was going to make a utopia here, but now I'm just gonna die here."

"I'm so sorry." How do you comfort someone processing the fear of mortality? She'd never processed it herself, she was thirteen, it was just another scary future thing she'd deal with when she had to. The best she knew how to do was be nice. "But... I'm here, okay? For—for anything you need." (Anything that wasn't evil, anyway—but now was not the appropriate time to make Bill feel like her support was conditional.)

"Tell me I won't die."

"You won't die! You're never, ever gonna die." Mabel hugged him tighter. "I'll fistfight Death. I'll—break his bony kneecaps."

"Thanks."

"I'll swing at the reaper with a baseball bat."

Bill laughed feebly. "With nails in it?"

"Yeah! And barbed wire! Connected to a battery!"

"Oh, we're taking Death down. Nobody's dying ever again."

"Everybody lives forever!" Mabel laughed; but it quickly petered out. "But... I'm not gonna let you die. You're my friend, and I won't let anything happen to you."

Bill's trembling had stopped, and his embrace was less death-grippy. "I owe you one, Shooting Star." From Bill, "thanks" sounded hollow, but "I owe you one" really sounded like a thank you.

"Hey. If I tell you a secret, do you promise not to do anything evil with it?"

"Sure. Promise."

Mabel doubted it, but that was as good as she was gonna get. "I've always thought you're still a triangle on the inside. You've got those creepy cat eyes that see the future and stuff! If you were just a normal human, wouldn't you have normal human eyes?"

Bill made a noncommittal noise.

"Plus, if you'd really been turned into a human on the inside, then being in a human body wouldn't feel so bad—right? It'd just feel normal."

Bill was silent for a moment. Voice hoarse, he whispered, "I hope you're right."

####

Fiddleford answered the door himself. "Stanford, Dipper, come in! I was just cleaning up." He had a broom, and the great hall's floor behind him was sparkling with broken glass. Ford was relieved to see Fiddleford had put on shoes. Unfortunately, they were fuzzy slippers. "Pardon the mess!"

"Think nothing of it. The shack's been turned upside-down, too." Ford stepped around a broken chair. "Don't you have anyone to help you clean, though?"

"Oh, I do, I do! I built me a Janitorial Executive Drone to tidy up," Fiddleford said. "I'm just cleaning up the mess JED left."

Ford and Dipper looked around at the shattered glass, broken furniture, scorch marks around the fireplace, and torn curtains. Dipper asked, "Did... JED make this place any cleaner?"

"Not at all!"

Ford and Dipper caught Fiddleford up on their scientific findings of the last couple days. Ford was almost embarrassed to admit they hadn't found any noteworthy quantities of micro-rips, as if he were confessing to a personal academic embarrassment—even after Fiddleford pointed out that it had been his own theory, not Ford's. (All the same, Ford hated to be so wrong, even by association. Being wrong felt like a moral failing.)

In return, Fiddleford told them what he'd been up to. He'd confirmed with them NASA fellas that the odd gravity effects weren't detected anywhere but Gravity Falls. At their behest, he'd set up some sensors around town, and when gravity suddenly reversed, the measurements they'd taken had allowed him to make a very loose model of the shape of the force that caused it. He showed Ford and Dipper the model on a computer in his lab, black screen with sharp glowing green lines forming an armature in the shape of a force. It looked like an enormous flying sausage that tapered down at one end. Too little detail to tell exactly what it was; but it certainly could have been an axolotl.

It was turning to look at the cliff where they'd stood.

Fiddleford wasn't pleased to find out the information he'd passed on from Soos had originally come from Bill; but he'd suspected it and already done all his soul-searching before reluctantly sharing his advice with the masses and hoping it wouldn't come back to bite him. "He didn't bother to warn us that gravity would actually disappear today, though," Fiddleford said indignantly. "So he could crow about being right and still get to see some folks get hurt, I reckon."

"Actually, this time I don't think he was hiding it. I kinda think he just made a mistake?" Dipper said.

Ford nodded. "Dipper's right. Bill was incredibly alarmed this morning when it became clear our estimates were wrong. It only made more trouble for him."

"I suppose," Fiddleford said grudgingly; then gave them a sharp look. "This mornin'? You took him camping?"

Ford and Dipper winced. Ford mumbled, "Not for fun."

"Stanford Pines—!"

It took a minute of hooting and hollering before Ford could calm Fiddleford down enough to explain the circumstances: that they'd only brought Bill because of just how much he explicitly did not want to be brought; that it had been a thoroughly unpleasant experience for everyone and Ford had never expected it to be otherwise; and that Bill had proven useful—Ford decided not to share the details—but he hadn't forgotten that Bill always made himself useful before he betrayed someone. If a man helped a little old lady cross a street, opened her door for her, put up her groceries, and then knocked her out and burgled her house, only one of those actions mattered.

(Dipper fell silent rather than help reassure Fiddleford. Ford supposed that was because he'd objected to bringing Bill, too.)

Fiddleford grudgingly admitted that under the circumstances, bringing Bill had been logical. "But that's just the thing—sometimes your logic don't account for the fact that you've got human emotions, too."

"Ah, yes, those human emotions. One of my worst flaws," Ford joked.

Fiddleford didn't laugh. "I mean it, Stanford. The most logical plan in the world don't mean nothing if he talks you into throwing it aside."

Ford thought of all the times he'd let his temper get the best of him over the last couple of days. Could he really say he'd made the logical decision when he'd made it out of anger? "Yes. I... see what you mean."

"Just be careful," Fiddleford said. "I saw you under that demon's oppression for months and never thought it was anything worse than how you always got around finals week—heck, for all I saw, I reckon he coulda started possessing you without me noticing—and I don't want that to happen again!"

Dipper winced. Ford found somewhere other than Fiddleford's face to look.

"What?"

"He... did. Possess me." (Dipper didn't pipe up with his experience. Ford didn't blame him.)

"He what? When?!"

"Remember toward the end of the project? When I started pulling all-nighters to finish the calculations...?"

Fiddleford smacked his forehead and sank down into the nearest chair.

Ford winced again. "I should have told you." During their talks over the past year, he'd been very reluctant to mention Bill or the fallout at the end of the portal project. They both had. "But—I assumed you'd guessed by now. What did you think was happening?"

"Frankly? I thought you'd started taking something illicit."

Ford snorted. "I—all right." He'd done stupider things during finals week.

"If he was possessin' you, why didn't you ask for help? I could've found somebody who knows how to do exorcisms. Did he not let you? Or—or did I miss you trying to tell me...?"

Ford shook his head. "No, I didn't want an exorcism." He wasn't sure Bill was the kind of "demon" that responded to exorcisms anyway. "At the time, I thought... that he was helping me."

Dipper reluctantly piped up, "He... possessed me once too. I didn't know that's what he was doing until too late, but... Even after you know he's a bad guy, he's really good at making you think he's just helping."

Fiddleford didn't immediately say anything to that. Ford couldn't meet his gaze.

Finally, Fiddleford said, voice low and worried, "Just tell me you won't let him get into your head again. Either one'a you."

Dipper shook his head. "Definitely not."

Ford said, "As he is now with all his powers gone, I don't think he can enter my head. Anyway, I had a metal plate surgically installed—"

"I didn't mean that way."

Right. "I won't. I promise."

Fiddleford nodded. "Didja really get a metal plate installed?"

Ford knocked on it demonstratively.

"Hmm." Fiddleford stroked his beard thoughtfully. He pointed at a contraption in the corner that looked like a ten foot tall tuning fork with electricity arcing between its tips. "Try not to get within five feet of that thing."

Ford eyed it nervously.

####

Fiddleford insisted Ford and Dipper stay for dinner. It was the first proper meal they'd had after two days of tubes mushy meat and mushy vegetables; so they tried not to show their disappointment when they received mushy meat and mushy vegetables. Fiddleford's automatic meatloaf-and-mashed-potatoes maker did its job more competently than JED did its, but Ford suspected that was partially because it didn't have legs to let it go get in trouble.

As they drove back into town, a stoplight turned red at the intersection with Main Street. Ford glanced down Main toward the library and asked, "Do you still want to stop by the library?"

Dipper, who'd nearly nodded off, blinked sleepily. "Huh?"

"To pick up Flatworld?"

Dipper yawned. "Honestly, I kinda just wanna go home and sleep."

"I hear that." He'd almost drowned today. He was exhausted. "Perhaps this weekend."

"Aren't you going to that concert with Mabel?"

"Was that this Saturday?" He'd lost track. Mabel had won four tickets from some radio contest to see Phrancisco in Portland and had asked Ford if he'd like to come. "I'm undecided. I'd like to go—I've been a fan of Invisible Plastic Yellow since they formed." He was the one who'd told Mabel about the band after their Portland trip and gotten her their albums. He'd had a phase when he'd really gotten into cutting-edge underground new wave music. It had made him feel conventionally cool, which not many things did. Now, all his musical tastes were three decades behind. He hadn't even known Phrancisco had a solo career until Mabel came home with tickets.

"But she's bringing her friends, and whoever has the fourth ticket needs to chaperone; and I'm afraid an old man escorting around three young girls would look... odd. It may be more appropriate for one of the other girls' parents to go." But he did want to see Phrancisco. "Perhaps I'll wait and see whether Mabel talks me into it."

"Better pack your bag now, then."

Ford laughed. He had a point. "If I do go to Portland, maybe I can stop by a bookstore to pick up Flatworld. If it tells us anything useful about Bill, I suspect we'll want a household copy for reference."

He was eager to reread it. He'd forgotten so much of it since college. He only recalled the vague, overarching plot: something about a third-dimensional sphere teaching a second-dimensional square about realities with higher and lower dimensions—from zero dimensions up to four—and a stuffy society based on what geometric shape you were... but that was it. He probably never even would have remembered the phrase "up but not north" if Bill hadn't referenced it. He wondered how much it could have helped him if he'd reread it sooner.

Dipper yawned again. "Sounds good."

The light turned green; and Ford drove past the library and headed on home.

####

(After going full tilt for two months, we finally get a breather lol. I hope y'all enjoyed, and I look forward to hearing your thoughts!)

#bill cipher #human bill cipher #mabel pines #fiddleford mcgucket #grunkle ford #dipper pines #gravity falls #gravity falls fic #gravity falls fanart #fanart #my art #my writing #bill goldilocks cipher

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kyojurosprettygirl · 1 year

Text

lost and found.

Hotaru Haganezuka x Fem! Hashira! reader

It wasn't unusual to see the infamous swordsmith without his yellow and brown haori, it wasn't something he wore religiously, but it was unusual to never see him with it. Nobody had thought anything of it, he probably lost it, or maybe he preferred his new black and gold one, whatever the reason was, it didn't concern them. He was able to get away from its whereabouts for quite some time, but he knew people would find out eventually.

Kanamori had asked him twice before what happened to his Hoari, being his usual attentive self. The first time he asked was out of genuine curiosity and care, if it's lost he'll help him find it. Hotaru brushes it off and says 'it's too hot to wear in this weather.' Kanamori agrees, and offers to give it to his wife to cut and sew the sleeves. Hotaru nods no and that he 'can always wear it in the colder months.' Hotaru thinks about how you had sewn buttons on his Haori, where if it ever gets too hot, you can connect the bottom of the sleeves to the buttons to create shorter sleeves. 'theres no need' he thinks. the conversation shifts, and it isn't brought up for a long time. The second time he asks, is out of wonder, its deep into the cold winter months and he still hasn't worn it, a black with gold embroidery taking its place, practically ridding it of its entire existence. He asks if Hotaru had gotten rid of it, and he simply nods. 'Change is good' Kanamori says, smiling.

Tecchin had asked him once, and only once. He hadn't asked where his Haori went, but rather, where he had gotten his new one from. Tecchin knew exactly where he got it from, but he didn't dare let on and just decided to tease Hotaru with it. 'A seamstress' he states, and Tecchin smiles mischievously behind his mask. 'Okay!' he says, and tells him it looks nice, but he's sad to see his old one go. Hotaru grunts and they go back to work.

Hashiras are well known members of the Demon Slayer Corps wherever they go, they are easy to spot with their difference in uniforms, and simply because everyone just knew them. But you were a new pillar, everybody knew your name and your breathing style, but they didn't know you, nor what you looked like. The entire Corps knew you, but the only Swordsmith who were able to say they know what you look like, was Tecchin and Hotaru, the latter who became your husband after many months of you requesting for his and only his swords. Once you became a Hashira, you sported your black and hold haori for about a year until you had switched yours with Hotarus, corresponding with the change in your last name. If anybody made the connection, they kept it to themselves.

"...it's no wonder he still can't find himself bride!" Kotetsu says, and if Hotaru heard, he dismisses it. "look! he's been revived." Kanamori gladly states, watching Haganezuka get up from his limp position as he begins to speak. "I will take this rusted blade into my care and fix it by using the Nichirin sword polishing art of the Haganezuka family, this surely will be able to restore it!" Kotetsu, in annoyance, states that he should have said that to begin with rather than to scare him and Tanjiro over it like a maniac. Those words had no big effect on him, until the last words slipped out. "Well, I guess thats expecting too much!" sass lacing the entire sentence. "What the hell just came out of your mouth!" He yells, grabbing Kotetsu by his collar. Kanamori and Tanjiro panic to get to his sides, his weakness, until you had made your presence known with the sound of you unsheathing your sword.

"Hotaru!" you softly say, a gentle tone embracing his name.

Kanamori is glad for his mask as it hides his shock perfectly. You had used his first name, so you must know him. Then he notices that your wearing Hotarus Haori. Tanjiro gasps and bows at you. "Hello Miss L/N!" Kotetsu uses the short distraction to get away from Hotaru and hides behind you, not even knowing who you are except from the fact that youre very obviously a Hashira and Hotaru would never hurt the highest ranking Demon Slayer. You bow back to Tanjiro and giggle, "Tanjiro, there is no need for such formalities. y/n is just fine," You smile the snort, "Besides, you got my last name wrong. Has it really been that long since i've last seen you? Hows Nezuko?" Tanjiro goes stiff and immediately apologizes, politely asking you for a refresher on your last name. "Nezuko is doing well, thankyou for asking!" He states, a flustered expression remains. You hum, streching your arms out to show the Haori, "Isn't it obvious? This Haori doesn't look familiar?" Tanjiro, Kanamori, and Kotetsu begin to stare at you, Kotetsu deciding he needed to circle around you three times to come to a conclusion. You laugh, "Haganezuka, its Misses Haganezuka now." They all let out a gasp and Kotetsu asks many questions, them all going unasnwered.

You tease Hotaru, who's stood their stiff the entire time, "My darling husband, my sword his dull," You begin showing him your sword and playfully pout. "Would it be okay if you sharpen it for me?" He grunts and nods, "Ofcourse, y/n, anything you need." He grabs your sword and tucks it away, leaving you to smile at him. You kiss his shoulder and cock your head behind you, "Kotetsu, I believe an apology is in check. He found himself a bride a looong time ago!" You giggle and you swear you see the boys soul leave. You squeeze Hotarus bicep in an apology for teasing him and begin to walk away when you come to a sudden stop. "By the way, I ask you all to please refrain from mentioning our marriage to anyone else, we rather is stay underwraps. We haven't decided on how to tell anyone yet." You smile softely and wish them all a good day.

Kanamori turns to Hotaru, "I must ask, do you both have rings?" You heard it and excitedly run back, "We do, Mister Kanamori!" You take your necklace out from inside your shirt and show him a beautiful gold ring, simple and elegant with traditional designs on it. You giggle to yourself, "Beautifully crafted by the hands of my husband, you can even see his full name engraved on it." Hotaru takes his ring out of his pocket and shows it to Kanamori, its simple and thicker, and the only engraving on it is your full name. You click your tongue and show him your engagement ring as well, It's gold and simple with a diamond resting above it. "This is the ring he proposed with, he didn't make it but its just as damn beautiful." Your eyes gleam with adoration and you sigh. "I must go now, but it was nice to meet you all!"

Kanamori hums, "I was wondering where that Haori went." Kotetsu snickers at that, "She makes it look ten times better!" He begins to laugh. Tanjiro smiles, "It fits her breathing style as well! Shes the eclipse pillar, the designs highlight it!" Hotaru ignores Kotetsus remark and finishes the conversation by switching out Tanjiros blade and continuing his training.

#kny x reader #kimetsu no yaiba #demon slayer #demon slayer x reader #kny #kimestu no yaiba #demon slayer kimetsu no yaiba #kny drabble #kny headcanons #kny fanfic #demon slayer fic #demon slayer headcannons #hotaru haganezuka #hotaru x reader #demon slayer haganezuka #kny haganezuka #haganezuka x reader

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allthingswhumpyandangsty · 2 months

Note

Hi there! As a new fic writer, I was wondering if you had any writing advice (in general), but especially for writing dead dove. Do you have any advice on how to make your writing impactful and more emotionally devastating (lol)?

I’ve always thought writing that hits a reader so hard that it effects them emotionally—as if they’re a part of the story themselves—are some of the best written (and my personal favorites to read).

Thanks so much!

the most important and effective advice in general that I can give anybody when it comes to writing, is that ‘practice makes perfect’.

however, it’s also important to note that I am by no means saying my writing is ‘perfect’ — because you (general you) stop learning and improving your skills the second you believe what you’re doing has already reached the point where it’s ‘perfect’, and that’s where it becomes a problem. there’s a difference between being proud of yourself and your work (which you should always be) and thinking that your work is already ‘perfect’.

so what I’m saying is; as long as you’re willing to keep learning, you will only keep getting better. always practicing, always learning.

your first ever work may not be as satisfying as you want it to be, and that is okay. looking back, the first ever fic I wrote almost 8 years ago would not be satisfying if I wrote it recently — considering how my writing style has changed, as I’ve found (still am continuing to find) what represents myself best in my works, and how I’ve learned and improved my skills — but that fic was still my creation and I still am proud of myself and of the art I’ve created; the thing is that I’ve practiced and learned and I’ve come a long way, and that’s what really matters.

as for writing dead dove, my advice would be ‘don��t hold yourself back just because you think this is too violent or too disturbing’. as I’ve always said, there is no such thing as ‘too far’, ‘too graphic’ or ‘too triggering’ when it comes to any form of art.

that being said, content warning is just as important. warn your potential readers beforehand about what they might be getting themselves into if they decided to give your writing a read. this doesn’t mean you have to ‘spoil’ your fic to them, just let your readers know what kind of content is in the work — for instance, child death, blood and gore, non-con, drug use, human trafficking, etc — so that your readers can decide for themselves if the work is too much for them.

but that does NOT mean you should stop writing about This Specific Topic You Love to Write About just because it’s too triggering for your readers. why? because, while your readers should always be appreciated, you don’t write for them. you write FOR YOURSELF.

write what you want to read.

write whatever you want.

you, the writer, are the priority of your work.

don’t write something you don’t want to write just because it’s what your readers want.

don’t hold yourself back from writing what you want to write just because your readers don’t like it.

the most important factor about writing fanfics and/or original works is that writing should be something you enjoy. not a job (even if you write original work as a career), you should always have fun doing what you’re doing. that’s how you can do your best.

the trick to writing an impactful and emotionally devastating scene is if YOU are invested in what you’re writing enough that words come from within yourself. and you can only be invested in what you’re writing that much if you love and enjoy what you’re writing.

it’s more difficult to love and enjoy what you're doing, if you’re doing it to please other people.

you see where I’m getting at? it’s all about your love, enjoyment and passion as a writer.

you don’t write for your readers. you write for yourself, and your work will attract to it the right readers who love the same thing you do. and that’s how you successfully write an impactful and emotionally devastating scene that can make your readers cry.

don’t think about whether or not your writing will have enough impact on your readers when you write, because thinking about that will only distract and prevent you from reaching your best potential. just be invested in your writing.

don’t think about whether or not your readers will like this; because worrying about whether or not your readers will like it will also distract and prevent you from doing your best.

if you want your readers to feel as if they’re a part of the story themselves, you yourself have to be emotionally invested in it that you feel like you’re a part of the story yourself. and that can only happen if you’re doing it for you. not for your readers. not for anybody else. but for you.

repeat after me ‘I am the priority of my writing’.

again, be invested in your writing. write whatever you want to write, no matter how disturbing or fucked up or violent your work gets, write whatever you want. just don’t forget to tag all the trigger warnings properly.

you don’t ‘try to attract people to read your work’. you get invested in your work, you write whatever you want, out of love and passion, and your work will attract the right readers to it.

I have no doubt you will become one of the best writers out there, anon. keep learning. keep writing. I’m rooting for you.

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sanzaibian · 2 months

Text

April 7th

Hey journal !

This is going to be hard to write… but I’ve decided to write down my experiences in this little journal I just bought for like, $7 at the local thrift shop, so here I go.

So, I’m Jay Callaghan, a 25 year old student in STAPS, hoping to become a physiotherapist (hope when I read that in 10 years I won’t be embarrassed !), and I’m gay. Like, very gay, nothing in me for girls. But… let’s just say than in sports studies, being gay isn’t well seen. So I keep my hookups on the down low, and avoid talking about that part of myself to anybody else.

And to be honest, it really drives me mad. I’m always double-checking that I’m not too faggy for their eyes, I’m always fidgety when discussions shift towards recent “conquests”, and I feel like I just miss out on so many things. I mean, it has only been, like, a year and a half since I fully accepted that I’m gay ? But still, the impostor syndrome has never faded, and by now, I just want it to stop.

By the way, here’s a photo of what I look like :

Dare I say I look pretty hot ? Well, this just makes things worse, actually. Because then the guys are always like “Yeah, look at Jay, he must be pounding so much pussy” or something… I just want to scream to them that no ! I’m very much very pounded ! And that’s not to say there aren’t people drooling over me ! There are ! But they all hail from the wrong gender !

However, recently I heard about the brand new Conversion Powder by Eamora Co., some kind of drug made by that unknown pharmaceutical company. What’s special about this powder is that it advertises itself as actually being able to change sexuality, so to make someone straight. Now, don’t get me wrong, I wholly support LGBT rights and want for any kind of conversion to be willful – so, like, not conversion therapy. Plus, both the instructions manual and the few reviews I found said that the powder must be taken once a day for the effect to persist. So it’s not as if it was an effective conversion therapy. But… I feel like things would be so much easier if I was straight. I wouldn’t be in constant fear, I would feel included with the other guys, and I would just be normal for once.

So yeah. I just want to end this by giving out my opinions on men and women :

Men are so fucking hot, well-built muscles, with big juicy pecs and a great six-pack invites licking, the hose downstairs is the work of god, and I just want to rub myself against it, accept it in my mouth and in my ass. Women… are just women. I guess they do have pec-like stuff, but they’re just so stuffy, and big and all. Plus, they just aren’t interesting in terms of attractiveness ? Not to shit on them, but just not my thing.

Yeah, let’s see how well it ages. I’m taking the Conversion Powder right now.

The evening

Okay, so I think from now on I should write on the evenings, because this way I can recap the events of the day while they’re still fresh in my mind. Plus, when class starts again tomorrow, it’s going to be a pain to write in the mornings.

So let’s start with when I took the powder. As the instructions asked, I put it in a glass and mixed it with water, to drink. At first, nothing happened, but then I started getting a headache, and felt quite dizzy for a while. I don’t know how long, because I didn’t record myself, and I know that my sense of time probably got warped, but it did feel long. And then, it just cleared, like magic.

To be honest, it was very underwhelming. I thought that something would happen to signal if it worked or not, but I decided to still test out if it actually worked. So I opened straight porn, and there the magic occurred.

By instinct, I started by watching the guy, but honestly, he just felt boring at first. I tried to see how hot he was, because I could tell he was attractive indeed, but it just felt… wrong to think of him as attractive. Which was unsettling in its own right. But then came the woman, and let me just say that : she was heavenly. She had tanned skin that ran along her beautiful curves, skimpy black leather pants and bra that espoused her big hips and breasts, and long black hair flowing over her back, waving in such a tasteful manner ! My dick was immediately woken up in quite the surreal moment, and I couldn’t help my self.

I beat myself off furiously at her being railed.

And I don’t even feel bad about that. I even printed out one of her photos to remind myself of her… God, my dick is awake once again by once again seeing her !

After that, I must admit that I spent a lot of time gooning myself on all the stuff I missed out on when I didn’t like women. I even almost forgot to eat lunch !

The afternoon, I decided to go on a walk outside, to see if anything different happened, and honestly… once again, it was quite underwhelming. I really don’t know what I expected, taking this powder for me to be this underwhelmed ! It only advertised that it would turn people straight, and this is what it did ! On a technical sense. Because I may be, in fact, straight at the minute, but I don’t feel straight. I… don’t know how to articulate that, I think I’ll have a better answer to that question when I’ve spent more time on the powder.

So yeah, what I wanted to write is that, when I was walking in the neighborhood, I did have the same experiences as watching the porn : I felt it was weird to conceive of men as a subject of attraction, and I paid more attention to women, but nothing more, really.

Well, nothing much more to say, I guess ! I’ll continue taking it, because it doesn’t seem dangerous, and since I’m closeted it shouldn’t change much.

April 8th

This morning I took again a Conversion Powder, and although I did feel quite dizzy taking it, it was nowhere as much as last time. That does comfort me since if I do decide to stick with this, it won’t be that annoying after a while. I read up on how it works to see if these headaches are normal, but aside from the few internet theoreticians, I haven’t found anything tangible… Nobody really knows anything about it, plus Eamora Co. is basically a completely unknown entity, so I can’t really get to the bottom of this. I guess this here diary may be the current best source for how the Conversion Powder works ?

But the most important thing today was getting back to school. And honestly, there I found that the changes were more substantial. I don’t know if it’s because I have also been on it yesterday, but it felt much easier to get into the skin of the typical straight guy. I didn’t have to worry about seeming too gay, because I technically am not, meaning that the school experience was a lot more peaceful. I also felt more included during the locker room talks. It’s crazy, because when they started to talk about boobs, my dick just hardened ! They mocked me, of course, I felt quite ashamed, but a good kind of ashamed. Like I’m actually having a normal reaction !

God, here I am writing about that kind of stuff… Well, to whoever might read that (me included), I have a duty to present everything of note ! So you’re going to have to bear with the stuff I already know I’ll find cringey in a few months’ time.

So yeah. On that, I’ll go to sleep.

April 9th

Man, I want to cross out the whole section about the powder on the web I wrote yesterday. And also the “I’ll go to sleep”. I’m not talking to anyone !

But yeah, today, the Conversion Powder made the media rounds.

And the rounds it made, in barely a day ! We got LGBT associations speaking out for its immediate discontinuing, far-right think tanks asking for it to be included in all school and high school meals, and politicians scrambling to state their opinion. It kinda feels bad for me to be technically not aligned with the LGBT associations, since I’m taking it, but this was my choice. I’m deciding to become straight, and my current experiences point that it was a good one. I’m feeling more and more connected with my bros (yes ! I can actually call them that, now !), and everyone who I knew before taking the powder say that I’ve recently been in a better mood than usual.

However, I won’t tell others that I’ve been taking it. I was closeted, and I don’t want people to think that I’m self-hating or something… I guess I kinda was, but that’s not the point I was getting at. The point I’m getting at is that I don’t fit the new stereotype of Conversion Powder-takers that is forming, and I don’t want people to think I do.

Also, even if more attention has been shed on Eamora Co. and the powder, there still is no good answer to the questions I wrote down yesterday.

Better news, though : today when taking the Conversion Powder, I almost didn’t feel dizzy at all ! It’s almost as if my body has fully acclimated to the Conversion Powder. If it’s how it works, honestly. However… I feel like I don’t have anything much to say about that ? I know, I know, such an earth-shattering change occurred in me, and two days in I don’t have anything to say about it ? I guess reality do be like that…

April 10th

Yes, I didn’t write much cringey yesterday !

But yeah, nothing much happened today, as do Wednesdays usually do. Though I guess I must mention that on the bus there was a really hot woman, I couldn’t get my eyes out of her. After a while of me basically staring at her though, I noticed that she knew I was looking at her, so I looked elsewhere. I guess, now, I understand the straight male experience, since I indulged in the same kind of creepy behavior… that is something I’ll need to fix.

About Eamora Co., they put out a statement saying that their product is ethical, and does not constitute a danger for the LGBT community. Although I’m technically on their side, let me say I’m calling bullshit on that. Seeing how potent this powder is, it’s easy for bad actors to drug gay and bi people without their consent, and even though they can fight against this kind of drugging, this kind of practice could very well lead into them assuming they were actually straight all along.

Here you go, let me step out of my soapbox.

April 11th

Okay, so, you know, Abby… No, I guess you don’t know, checking back I didn’t talk about her at all in this diary.

So, Abby was (and still is) a good friend in my university. She doesn’t study the same stuff as I do, but we got to know each other in business management class. We hit it off quite well, even though I wouldn’t call her my best friend by any stretch (I had much closer friends back in high school), she went along well with my way of being.

But here comes the catch.

Now that I’m straight, I’ve noticed that she… is actually quite well-endowed. Plus, over the last few days I would even dare say that she’s actually… cute. I mean, look at her and dare not tell me that she’s not cute !

Okay, I do realize that no one is gonna answer me here… but still ! Diary ! Or anything ! Agree with me !

I think this means that I may be having my first straight crush… on who was basically my only true friend in this university… not the best look. But at least it proves that the powder converts both sexual and romantic attraction ! It’s a good observation to include in this diary.

So yeah… gonna see how it evolves…

April 13th

Oops, I forgot to write, yesterday !

So I just hung out more with the bros, it’s been so fun to just… chit-chat with them ! I feel like we have a real connection, like they get me, like I get them. That’s something I could never have had when I was gay, I was forced to just stay out of the loop with everyone. I’m glad I’ve decided to start going on the conversion powder, because now I can finally get to live a normal life ! … not to insult my former comrades, of course.

But with Abby… I must admit I’m not proud of myself, because I basically avoided her for the past few days… I’m getting so flustered when I’m with her, it’s really embarrassing, but now I fear she thinks I’m abandoning her… I’m also being so obvious ! Like, this morning Abby walked in front of me when I was hanging out with my bros, going to some kind of economy class, and I just blushed to hell ! The bros all clocked that I have a crush on her, and I fear she might too ! God, so embarrassing !

Tomorrow, since it’s Sunday, I don’t have class, so the bros asked me to go to the gym with them, and I’m 95% sure they’re gonna cook me alive for having that damn crush…

Help !

April 15th

I forgot to write yesterday again… I was so tired from the very intensive sesh that we had that I just went straight to dine and sleep, so give me a break, diary.

So, as I predicted… Saturday, the guys cooked me, and cooked me hard. They were like “why don’t you talk to her”, “you’ve seen her look”, “do the first move” and all, it was quite overwhelming while we were working out… But they were basically saying that I shouldn’t hesitate to ask her out, as even if it doesn’t work out there’s other girls to find…

God, this is the kind of advice that I would never have had if I was having a gay crush. Nobody would be there to be excited for me, they would all be uninterested to disgusted, and none could give me advice for how to do… because the only people who could would be the very kind I may want to woo !

So yeah. Out of my soapbox, today I talked to Abby… and I couldn’t do it. I chickened out, I didn’t ask her out… Like, I was just about to ! But then somebody let their coat drop, and Abby, kind soul she is, picked it up for them… and after that, my courage just disappeared, and I just brought up the topic of the Conversion Powder and the whole drama.

Yeah. About the Conversion Powder drama.

So, let’s just say that it got heated, and it became the controversy that everyone was talking about. I don’t know what my country will choose as a way forward, but some have already chosen to outlaw it… and the usual suspects have made it official “prescription” to “cure” gayness. I’m against both options, and although I think none will be taken by our government, they currently haven’t chosen a stance… I’ll keep a close eye on it, because I’d hate for my experiment to be cut short just because of them deciding for me…

April 16th

This time, I didn’t miss a day ! Yay !

So… I asked Abby out.

It was as if the stars aligned. Today she dressed in very hot clothes, and we had class together both before and after lunch. So I took the opportunity to ask her to meet with me at the park. But then, at the afternoon, it started raining… I was afraid that our meet-up would have to be canceled, but just before it was time to end the classes, the sky cleared up ! So we went to the park, and my favorite bench in front of the pond was free ! We sat together, and there, I asked her if she wanted to go out with me.

And she said yes !

God, it feels so good ! My first ever date, and not hookup !

I’m just buzzing with excitement, we’re gonna see each other this Saturday afternoon after class ! I’m already envisioning it : first we get together in a cafe, then we go to the park and visit its zoo at the same time ! It’s going to be perfect !

I’m so ready for it !

April 17th

So, I’ve told the bros the good news… and somehow, the conversation drifted on clothes, and we realized that I don’t really have any “date” clothes – or at least, not straight date clothes. They said that it wouldn’t go, and Terry and Joe took me this afternoon to the shops, as they said that, as “pussyhounds” they know what makes girls go apeshit. There, they encouraged me to buy a nice black dress shirt, dark blue jeans and a fancy belt, so now they’ve been added to my wardrobe. They also told me to prepare some cologne, a golden chain and a fancy watch, because they said that it’s the kind of details women always pay attention to, but I already have some of those, so I’m covered.

I guess I’m ready for my date ?

April 20th

Fuck, I forgot again twice to write in this diary. I guess I should only write in it when there’s something interesting happening, because I only seem to remember writing in it when something involving my newfound straightness happens…

So yeah. The date with Abby was magical. Never have I ever been more glad to have made the choice to become straight. When we met up, she was just fabulous. Dressed impeccably, in a way that, yes, made her boobs pop out wonderfully, but it also made her beautiful eyes twinkle, her luscious lips glow and her fluffy hair shine. And the way she walked, so agile, so dainty… Bro, there’s nothing that can capture how beautiful she is ! And she’s also so smart, and such good company ! We talked for hours, made cute poses in front of the animals, and even stayed together for dinner – although we went out to McDonald’s, not enough money nor organization to go to a fancier place.

Perfect ! Absolutely perfect !

This is the kind of experiences normal men have ! And they’re so much richer than anything these gay hookups ever gave me !

Taking the Conversion Powder was the best decision in my life !

May 4th

May the force be with you ! haha

It’s been two whole weeks since I last wrote in this diary, it was time for me to give you an update, diary.

The last two weeks have been hell, because it’s exam season. So between studying, working out and dates with Abby, I haven’t had time for anything ! Bro, even my dates were study dates ! But otherwise… Everything’s going swimmingly ! I’m pulling along with my bros, and my relationship with Abby is going wonderfully !

Really, I know I’m writing the same thing again and again, but ever since I became straight, everything has become better ! Like, I’m better as a straight guy than I would ever have been as a gay guy, I’m sure of that ! It’s… even becoming kinda weird to think of myself as ever being gay, honestly...

God, it’s so refreshing to be normal !

May 6th (the morning)

A bit of a weird update, this morning before my last exam, because… er… we had sex yesterday.

So here’s how it went. Yesterday, we had another study date, but this time at my place. It was boring, of course, but to get out of the boredom we decided to make some raunchy remarks in-between economics and anatomy. And it made us both quite horny… well, at least it made me quite horny, because my dick was just rock hard, ready to squirt by the end of the session… And then we continued the remarks, without interruption… I got closer to her, started touching her, she started touching me, and then the clothes started coming down…

And you kinda know how it goes, but for me it was special. Because I have a ton of sex experience, but none when it comes to shoving my dick in a hole. I did have quite a good time eating her pussy, wayyyyyy tastier tasty than dick mind you, and she did make me come by giving me a blowjob, but then came time to do the deed. I put my condom on, and then honestly… it was a blast. I came just naturally once I had my dick inside her pussy, I just thrusted, and thrusted and thrusted, a ton of times, as if I was plowing her. She was orgasming, I was orgasming, and when we finally came, we just laid there, cuddling, until we both began sleeping.

I’m writing that as she’s taking her shower, just after my Conversion Powder drink, so I won’t be able to write too much, but really… it was the best sex I ever had. Hands down. Really, it feels like straight sex has been designed to happen, unlike anal, blowjobs and all. God, I’m so glad to have taken the powder !

May 8th

Okay okay okay, BIG NEWS !

This afternoon, Abby and I went to a date in the park, and guess what – I mean, a diary isn’t gonna answer me, but yeah. Abby asked if I wanted to be her boyfriend !

It made me just so happy ! Like, finally for the first time ever I have an actual relationship ! I have a girlfriend !

I’ll announce it to everyone ! Well, I kinda already have, but I thought after that that I should write it down here. I’m becoming the model straight guy, and I couldn’t be more up for that !

May 19th

Everything is going for the best, a month and a half in ! (about)

I think I’m gonna stop writing in this book, because I think there’s nothing I can write in it that’s new ! I’m a normal straight guy with a steady relationship with my beautiful girlfriend, Abby, and I hope – and think – that we’re going endgame. Like she’s so beautiful and she goes along with me so well, you can’t understand !

I’m also bulking thanks to all the workout I get with the bros, here, look at that photo :

Oh yeah, I did decide to cut down my hair. It was so long, it was bothersome, and I already have Abby, so I don’t need to look attractive to anybody, just to her. Plus, it made me look faggy, even though I’m straight.

So yeah, you can guess I’m a living example of why the Conversion Powder is a good thing for people who want it ! I’m so happy, and I have found the love of my life ! It almost feels like it was meant for me to be straight !

So… goodbye, I guess ? Or to next time something worth writing about happens ?

June 1st

I thought I wouldn’t ever touch this diary again, but today I saw a ton of pictures on the internet saying happy Pride Month, and… it made me feel empty inside.

I remember last year when I went to local Pride, it made me feel so… not alone ? Like I was part of something bigger, of a community of people who suffer the same kind of things as I do. But when I see all those pictures, I just feel like it’s not talking to me. I don’t feel like I’m part of the LGBT community anymore, because I’m just a normal straight guy, and I guess it’s the first time I somewhat feel some regrets ?

Now, I looked at my local Pride, and apparently this year’s prominent topic is the Conversion Powder, trying to ban it, so even if I wanted to go in as an ally, I would be the embodiment of what they’re avoiding…

I dunno, I’m feeling very conflicted. And it’s not the kind of things I can really talk about with Abby, considering to her I was always a normal straight guy. So I guess I’ll write about it here when I feel like venting.

June 3rd

This whole Pride Month thing is really going to my head, I cannot help but think about it… I look away each time I see rainbows, I avoid LGBT news and I feel awkward each time I see someone being visibly LGBT…

But really, I think I’m being so obsessed by it that I’m triggering old memories of when I was gay, I almost caught myself checking out a guy… If I didn’t know I was on the Conversion Powder, I would have said I was living through a gay awakening…

June 5th

OKAY OKAY CODE RED IT’S CONFIRMED I’M SOMEHOW REGAINING MY ATTRACTION TO MEN !

It’s too much to only be Pride Month behind that. I’m actively being turned on by men… even though I’m taking the powder everyday… each time it happens I switch to a mental image of a woman, but it doesn’t seem to really do anything…. I’m straight, that’s for sure, but why is my body suddenly not wanting to respond correctly ?

Fuck, why am I writing this, it has to be a fluke, I’m sure… I must be quite horny, since Abby has been quite busy with her internship.

I’ll call her up, have some good straight sex like I should, and see if this fluke happens again tomorrow (hint : it won’t).

June 6th

It did.

If I could sigh on paper, I would. Trust me.

The sex was a bit forced, I’ll admit, but today when I went for a morning jog, I saw one of the most drop-dead gorgeous guy I had ever seen… He was quite muscular, but not too much, was tall, handsome, had great hair and a light dusting of body hair where it mattered. Plus, his pecs were quite prominent, it felt as if I could squeeze them and sleep on them, they were so juicy… Fuck, reading back I’m describing that guy like I used to describe guys when I was gay, even though I’m straight…

Tomorrow I’ll up the dose of Conversion Powder, I’ll see what will happen.

June 7th

Do NOT take more than one dose of Conversion Powder at once, learn from my experience.

When I took those two drinks, I had the worst headache I’ve ever had… and then I was hyper-horny for a good 6 to 8 hours, wanting to fuck women, fuck women and fuck women… I’m really happy I had nowhere to go today, since I just gooned myself to straight porn for hours on end, even forgot to eat. It was actual madness.

But then, suddenly, my horniness stopped. I was just… spent, sitting inside a mess of cumstains that were hell to wash out, not really understanding what happened to me.

I’m afraid.

June 9th

The situation did not improve, my attraction to men just kept coming back, to the point I can basically now call myself thoroughly bisexual. But I’m not under any illusion : my attraction to women is very likely going to fade at some point.

And it’s going to make me lose Abby.

I’ve also looked around on the web, and found that I’m not actually the only one to be “reverted”, as people seem to refer to it as. Apparently, it’s due to people being used to the drug : since it cannot actually change attraction, it only overwrites attraction. So it acts like a drug, the more you take it the less effective it becomes…

So yeah, I’m becoming gay whether I want it or not…

June 12th

It’s beginning. The end is beginning.

I feel it, how women are starting to interest me less and less. I’d rather be dealing with dicks than with pussies… I had sex with Abby yesterday, and I just wasn’t into it. It just didn’t feel as exciting, as wonderful as it used to be when I first had sex with her…

Even she noticed it, and asked if everything was alright with me. I lied about being tired because of training, but it will only get me so far… I need to tell her at some point, before it’s too late. But I just don’t have the heart to break hers, it would also break my heart to have to leave her… I really wish I could stay straight…

So much for being “normal”, eh ?

June 14th

This afternoon, we met for our usual Wednesday dates. And I gathered the courage to tell her everything.

I told her how I was gay, how I used the Conversion Powder, how I then had a crush on her, and how I’m slowly becoming gay again. I was so afraid telling her that. Because I absolutely was in the wrong, I kept her in the dark about an important part of myself, and I was afraid of her reaction… heh, it’s kind of my first coming-out, in a way.

However, Abby, blessed be her heart, took it in strides, and the only thing she became angry over was the fact that I decided to take the Conversion Powder… Turns out she’s bisexual, and is really against it, and I guess I became another example for her to latch onto to deem it unacceptable… We had a goodbye kiss, and I told her that I still had a few days of liking women, so we should do whatever last thing together as a couple as we can.

I’ll see what she has in store for me.

June 15th

Okay, today was wild.

Abby basically took a whole day off just for me, and invited me to her place. And I was barely inside her bedroom that she just came in with tons of sex toys. I’m not even sure where she found half of those… And so, we just spent the remainder of the day having sex in many a kinky setup… the last of my straight sex would be kinky sex…

It was great, I hadn’t had so much fun in a long while, especially worrying this much about the end of the Conversion Powder… and I feel that from now on I’ll know her body way too much for someone who will soon become her Gay Best Friend.

So yeah, a great way to close the straight chapter of my life. We’ve decided, with Abby, that tomorrow I’ll get off the Conversion Powder, and that will be our official break up.

June 16th

First day without Conversion Powder, and I’ve been in bed fighting the inevitable headache that such an action accompanies.

Abby was kind enough to come look after me, and it honestly felt really weird to look at her and feel basically not much happening in my dick. Only remained aesthetic attraction.

While she was here, I made her read this diary. It was quite a humbling experience, as she was basically reading through my heart. Her reactions ranged from laughter to concern, including a few realizations about our history together. I mean, I didn’t know she remembered the time I almost confessed to her but was interrupted by someone else !

She also told me that it was weird how I didn’t mention being afraid about the bros, and honestly… I find it also weird now that she mentions it. I dunno, when I decided to take the powder, fitting in with the bros was such a priority for me, yet today, I feel like I have such a good relationship that I wouldn’t trust them to care either way. But I did make a coming out message in our group chat, basically explaining the same stuff as I did with Abby. I’ll see how it goes, but currently Terry eagerly responded with a “I support you!!!!!!1!!!”.

June 18th

My headache was very strong, and I stayed in bed again yesterday, but by now I think it has passed. I didn’t expect the aftereffects of the Conversion Powder to be this severe...

I don’t think I’ll have much to say in this diary in the future, especially as I seem to be going back to the normal me. I mean, normal gay me. But since I’ve had a lot of time to think about this whole situation the past few days, I’ll write about my experiences here.

So, first of all, I’m glad to have made this experience of what straight life looks like. However, I also think that it was a mistake.

Basically, I think that when I did it, I took the easy way out. Pointing to an inalienable part of myself as being the cause of all my woes and then trying to remove it, it just shows a laziness from me. Like I can’t try and imagine what an actual solution looks like, I have to change myself before being able to fix stuff. However, I feel that this experience made me learn that I was actually able to do all the things I felt were lacking. Talking to Abby she made me notice that, aside from being straight, nothing really changed after taking the Conversion Powder, so all the things I blamed myself for making me look faggy just… didn’t. It was only me being afraid, and letting it talk rather than the rational mind. So all the good things I had when I was straight, I can just have them if I get out of the mindset that gay is bad.

So… yeah ! Although it still feels a bit weird to say, I’m gay, and I’m proud ! All my woes weren’t due to me being gay, they were due to me being afraid, so now I decide to not be afraid anymore ! I hope that whoever reads this diary (including me) will understand that they don’t need to take out a part of themselves to find happiness. They need to get over their fears, and only this way will the road to happiness will be opened !

Well said, love from the past ! -T

#male transformation #male tf #gay to straight #straight to gay #mental change #transformation #tf story

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casualpersonapersonpeach · 8 months

Note

Can we have where The Slasher's S/O had Chemotherapy, and are now becoming bald because of it. (Either the S/O explains about the effects of chemotherapy or that they're depressed because of their hair loss, it's up to you). [Include Jason Voorhees, Michael Myers, Thomas Hewitt, Bubba Sawyer, and a character of your choice; probably The Silent Brother from my previous request ;) whoever you want]

Hello ! Of course. TW to anybody reading. If anybody is going through this right now, I hope that you know you are so loved and if you need to reach out I'm always here 💗💗💗 also apologies for how long this took to write. Hopefully you like this 😭

warnings 18+: slightly suggestive in Thomas' one

Slashers with an s/o going through Chemotherapy

(Includes Jason Voorhees, Michael Myers, Thomas Hewitt, Bubba Sawyer)

Jason Voorhees

Because Jason lives a very sheltered life, he doesn't know much about illnesses and treatments. You may have to explain it to him and how the process works.

It would break his heart. He hardly knows what to say or do initially. He's in shock. He noticed some clumps of hair on the pillow cases every now and then, but he wasn't sure what to make of it. He didn't want to bring it up because it may upset you.

It makes sense to him now. He offers to shave the rest of your hair if you find that easier. Jason is just worried about you. "Are you going to be okay? What can I do to help you? I have no idea what I can do" he panics to himself. He's trying to be strong for you.

Jason worries how you are going to feel about yourself as well. He's bald too but for different reasons, and he knows what it's like to be bullied for things you can't help, and hating himself in the mirror. He's going to do everything he can to let you know how beautiful you are. He wants your confidence to be unshakable, even though that's hard. You don't deserve to go through such a thing. And you definitely don't deserve to feel anything less than beautiful.

He just cuddles you a little bit tighter, kisses you a little longer to try reinforce to you he's always going to be there for you and get through this with you. He writes down a note for you for when you wake up the next morning.

" My darling Y/n. I'm sorry that I should have taken more initiative for you and been stronger for you. I shouldn't have said nothing. I'll do anything i can to help you my beautiful angel. You are my entire world, and nothing is going to change that, and you'll always be the most beautiful person to me. " - Jason.

Jason decides to devote himself to nursing you, driving you to appointments (while in disguise), making safe food for you, helping you when you need to vomit etc. He is on high alert mode to protecting you in his little shack from any dangers.

Michael Myers

Michael is less delicate about the situation. He just holds up a clump of hair and looks confused while looking at you. He didn't mean to look like an asshole, he just didn't know it was something he needed to be sensitive about. Your eyes started to water, and quickly you walked off to your shared bed to sleep.

Michael had noticed you hadn't seemed your normal self for a few weeks now. You hardly spoke to him, you were gone for hours randomly, and when you were home, you just slept and looked depressed.

He didn't really know how to bring it up though, michaels just not good at beating around the bush, per say. He's just direct which can feel really cold.

Michael finally walked into your room to check on you. He normally liked to wait for you to bring up what's bothering you, but he figured that it clearly wasn't working lately. He needed to do more. He sits next to you and gently places his hand on your shoulder.

He hardly talks, but when he does it's short and direct. "What's wrong?" He quietly muffs under his mask.

It took you a moment to work up the courage to explain. You explain that in the last month you've been getting chemotherapy and have been starting to lose you hair. He then understood why you were always so tired, nauseated, and so unlike yourself.

"I just didn't want to tell you" you say under your breath. "I could hardly believe that this was happening to me. I just feel so down about losing my hair too. I hardly feel like myself anymore. It's like i can't recognise myself".

Michael just sits in silence. " I didn't want you to feel ashamed of me..." Michael quickly wraps you in his arms. Holding you tighter than he would have ever done. "Never. I will never be ashamed." He grunts. It kind of sounds like he's crying a little too, but he'd never let you see that.

Somewhere deep down Michael has a heart. Maybe just for you though. It crushes him that you are already going through something so cruel and life threatening. And how you are worrying instead if he'd still find you attractive. He wants you to know he would never find you unattractive NO MATTER WHAT.

When you feel a wave of nausea overcome you, Michael is quick to notice, and sweeps you quickly in his arms and holds you whole you vomit into the toilet.

Michael made a silent vow to himself. One being he'd help you get through this. The second being, if he had to go find Rapunzel herself and chop off her hair to get you some, just so you can feel a little bit better during this time, he won't waste a minute. He'd do it in a heartbeat for you.

He kisses your head and helps you settle into bed. He's already making a plan...

Thomas Hewitt

Being in the middle of nowhere meant that there was no way to hide your illness. Usually mama Luda Mae or Thomas would drive you to the closest hospital to receive treatment.

Tommy didn't really go out in public, he didn't want to make this about himself, his fear of being seen was nothing compared to the trial that you were going through.

None of the Hewitt's really knew much about medicine, side effects and so on. Sometimes the uncle's would make insensitive comments to you, but tommy and Luda Mae never let that slide.

Shortly you began to lose your hair. Sometimes Uncle monty would make a sly remark that " you were balding quicker than he was ". It drove Thomas mad, and he actually stood up to him. Thomas grabbed him by his shoulders and slammed him against the wall and gave him such an intense death stare.

For Thomas it was a big deal standing up to his family. But you mean more to him. He wishes he could afford to get you out of this place. Once his family was his safe place, but ever since you came into the picture, he noticed how poorly the uncles treated you. From then on he always dreamed of getting away with you.

You are his sanctuary. No matter how ill you are. Thomas didn't really understand the science behind the hair loss, but he did notice how unhappy you seemed. You hardly looked at him, you were no longer physically intimate with him (due to health risks for immunity, but also depression and poor body image), you also withdrew any kind of innocent affection.

It wasn't intentional- or against Thomas. You have been so unwell, and on chemo so you wouldn't have been intimate even if you felt good about yourself or wanted to. But it was so easy to spiral into a deep depression because you could hardly recognise yourself.

You became so self hating, even though none of this was your fault. Hair is such an important part of identity and it's hard losing something you're so used to and treasure. You worried you wouldn't be beautiful to Thomas, and above all, you were worried that you were 'useless' or 'a burden' that the uncle's had convinced you that you were.

You are unable to work, which meant having to rest all day. You are too unwell to help around the house, and money is tight as it is. Thomas eventually noticed this and wanted to talk to you about it.

One night before you and Thomas got ready for bed, he decided he would ask you what was wrong. He had been afraid of bothering you this whole time. He quietly asked "why do you hardly look at me anymore? Is everything ok?"

It didn't take long for your eyes to being to tear up. And after a few minutes, you finally mustered up the courage to tell him why you're upset. "I just hate how I look at the moment. I'm so scared you won't find me beautiful anymore so I didn't want to try. I'm sorry for making you worry".

"You could never be ugly to me my darling... You're just as beautiful as the day I first saw you. The day my life changed forever. I promise I'm going to look after you and only when you're ready and wanting to, we can get back to that".

"One day, i hope to get you out of this hellhole. For better or for worse, I want to look after you as long as we live.... Y/n... Would you marry me?" Thomas softly asked. He definitely intended on proposing on a happier day, and to plan it out. But for him the timing felt right, when you two finally felt like you were connecting again after a while.

"... Really? You'd want to marry me, even like this?" You replied. "Yes." "Yes Tommy! I'll marry you!". You jumped into his arms, and he held you tighter than he ever had before.

You both longed for a life far away together, to get married, to raise your own children together. But for now, Tommy will nurse you back to health.

Bubba Sawyer

Even though Bubba couldn't speak comprehensible sentences, he still communicated and you understood him like no other. Again, living out far away meant you had to be honest about how unwell you had been feeling, so reluctantly Drayton took you to the doctors, and from there you got your diagnosis and eventually treatments.

Bubba is incredibly intuitive and immediately knows when something is wrong, so when you begin to lose your hair and feel drained, he is quick to communicate with you.

He mostly blubbers, but he can sort of write. He does misspell some words, and doesn't have the best handwriting, but his brothers taught him as much as they could about writing.

"ar yu pheelin ok?" Even in your darkest moods, seeing Bubba's writing makes you giggle because it's sweet to know he's trying. "Bubba have you not noticed my hair missing or that i look any different?" You asked. You assumed he was going to make a comment about that. Not that it was in his nature to do so, you were just feeling insecure.

"Drayton tould me sum stuff about yur treetment. I thought it wuz that." He hastily wrote. "Well, I haven't been feeling the best physically of course. But emotionally too. I mean, i knew that the chemo would be hard on me, but i didn't expect to feel sensitive i guess? Im just not happy when i look in the mirror." You covered your face with your hands, crying.

Bubba jumped immediately to your side holding you. He was making all sorts of sounds to console you. Once he felt you beginning to calm down, he signed with his hand, holding up 1 finger to say give him a moment. He began to write again.

He had an undefeated smile on his face. Bubba was coming up with a plan to make you feel better. "Butt yur always beautiful to me. yu look good no mater wat. My brutha is bald as a pluked turkey ona thanksgivin.... I hav a litle surprise for yu. Close yur eies darlin".

It momentarily made you feel a bit better. You did chuckle a little that chop top had a metal plate on his head too, and he definitely hadn't lost any confidence on his part.

You hear nubbins, bubba and chop top giggling upstairs. Soon enough bubba and his brothers came walking downstairs, with a towel covering bubba's face and head.

"M'lady, it has come to the courts attention that we need to even out the playing field a little. May i present to you, your new and improved.... Bubba Sawyer!" And in the most theatrical way possible, nubbins and chop top removed bubba's towel to reveal a brand new haircut. Then they burst out laughing.

Bubba decided amongst his brothers that hopefully if he gets a silly haircut, you might feel a little better. If he makes himself look silly, you might have a little distraction, and not that you are any less beautiful with hair loss (because you're always beautiful no matter what) but to help you feel less out of place.

It was also heartwarming to see chop top and nubbins take something kind of seriously for once and consider how you are feeling during this hard time. They don't really know how to help other than with humor, but you appreciate that anyways.

They really revamped his look. They tried colour blocking a section of bubba's hair by his left ear by bleaching it, but they used household bleach so it just burned his hair off, leaving any remaining hair bleached blonde, but very short and left some skin on his head irritated and red. It didn't bother him in the slightest.

Nubbins buzzed a large bald spot on his crown, and the two brothers took turns hacking at his curls to create an asymmetrical look. It was very silly, but they did it out of love, not to mock you.

"people would pay good money in england for an asymmetrical look like this huh" nubbins smirks to himself. "Can't believe you know that word man." Chop top replies.

It wasn't a permanent fix to the pain you would be going through, but bubba just wanted to make you smile even for a few minutes. Anything to let you know that he's with you through this.

#jason voorhees #michael myers #thomas hewitt #bubba sawyer #jason voorhees x reader #michael myers x reader #thomas hewitt x reader #bubba sawyer x reader #friday the 13 #halloween movie #texas chainsaw massacre 2003 #texas chainsaw massacre #slashers #slashers x reader

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thiswasneverthat · 1 year

Text

friday

ㅡ seven masterlist

❅ chan x fem!reader

❅ smut, minor dni, masturbation, just overall chris being chris ig

❅ wc: 1.2K

When Chris said you were gonna pay for messing with him earlier in the morning, you thought it was an empty threat. He had this tendency to do that in the bedroom while you both were fucking each other's brains out.

However, it appeared that in this particular instance, you may have overlooked the significance of his wordsㅡ which you shouldn't have done.

When you got home later at night, you were welcomed by the unforeseen sight of him in the living room. He was sitting down on the couch while watching a football match, wearing nothing but a running short.

"Hey, is there something wrong with the aircon?" you squinted your eyes at him, head tilted slightly.

"No, it's working just fine," Chris answered casually without sparing you a glance.

"So?" you cleared your throat before walking toward the kitchen. "What has gotten to you, then? Don't you have any clean shirt to wear?"

You have seen Chris naked so many times, but it was rather out of the ordinary to witness him comfortably seated in the living room like that without any perceptible motive.

"Why? Does it bother you?"

From where you were standingㅡ in front of the fridge, you couldn't see his face but you could feel that he was smirking as he said that.

"No, it doesn't," you answered rigidly before downing a mouthful of cold water down your throat to soothe your jitters.

Out of nowhere, a staggering sensation then arose as you felt an inexplicable warmth slowly emanating from your cheeks, causing a slight flush to color your complexion.

"Do we still have some beers?" Chris asked casuallyㅡ and unbeknownst to you, he was already walking toward the kitchen.

"Yeah, yeah, we do. I'll get you one."

While still oblivious to the fact that Chris was approaching closer, you hastily retrieved a can of beer from the fridge. However, when you turned around, your face nearly collided with his bare chest, causing you to let out a startled gasp.

"Jesus fucking Christ!"

"You okay, babe?" he asked with a mischievous laugh as one of his hands automatically came up to hold your shoulder.

"Chris, my God! Don't sneak up on me like that!" you grumbled and closed your eyes.

With him standing in close proximity, the distinctive scent of his perfume enveloped your senses, causing a dizzying effect on your head.

"What?! I didn't mean to sneak up on you," Chris shook his head as his laughter subsided. "Why are you so antsy, though?"

"Never mind! I am going to take a bath," you quickly handed him the can of beer before you bolted out to the bathroom.

Something must have gone wrong with you, because why were you so agitated since the first second you saw him shirtless in the living room.. right?

It shouldn't be a problem if he doesn't want to wear a freaking shirt at home.. right? It wasn't like there were anybody else except the two of you.

And for fuck's sake, you have seen him naked more times than you cared to count.

"Shit, what the hell is wrong with me?!" you groaned to yourself before you stepped into the bathtub.

As you let out a long and heavy sigh, you slowly submerge yourself under the water, hoping that the comfort could wash away your intrusive thoughts. You needed to stop fantasizing about his abs in your head. You seriously needed to stop salivating over how insanely stunning he looked without a damn shirt.

But the most important thing was to detach yourself from the incessant flow of thoughts. Because you were so absorbed in your own mind that the presence of Chris joining you in the bathroom went completely unnoticed.

Without making a noise, he swiftly slid down his shorts and walked over to the shower which was next to the bathtub, separated merely by a glass wall.

Only when he turned on the water that you finally snapped out of it. "Oh myㅡ Chris! What are you doing?!"

"Taking a shower, what else?" Chris said casually as he threw his head back a little, relishing the warm water coursing down his naked body. "You okay, though? You are not yourself."

"What?! No, no, Iㅡ I am fine, no worries," you stuttered and then averted your eyes.

How is this possible? Your heart was pounding violently when you caught a glimpse of him standing naked under the shower as if it was your first time.

Did he do all of this on purpose? Or it was you who was overly sensitive?

"Fuck," you hissed and hurriedly reached for the shower gel. For your own sakeㅡ to avoid worsening your emotional turmoil, you need to speed up your bathing ritual.

However, as you were about to stand up and grab the towel that was placed near the sink, you stopped dead in your track when you heard a soft moan.

In the next second, your pupils dilated and you felt your stomach churned. And much to your dismay, your head turned on its ownㅡ facing the source of the noise.

There he was, standing under the running shower while massaging his cock.

"Ah, fuck fuck," Chris grunted sharply before he bit his lower lip. His chest heaved up and down, his eyes sealed shut and his hand working with great vigor to satisfy himself.

From where you were standing, your view began to be obstructed by the fog that enveloped the glass wall, which then prompted you to let out a loud groan.

"Enjoying the view?" he asked through gritted teeth without glancing over at you.

"Huh? Whaㅡ what? I didn'tㅡ" your words came out in a jumble, stuttering and stumbling over each other after he caught you like a deer in the headlights.

You then only stood in your spot, your mouth opening and closing like a fish out of water. You had no idea what to say or how to explain yourself. Your eyes darted around nervously, hoping for some kind of way out of the situation.

And Chris was right. You were not yourself.

"Come closer then," his command came out in a low guttural grunt before he turned around to face you instead of the wall this time. "Look at what you'll be missing for the next couple of days."

Heeding his command, you took a few steps closer and held your breath. Your heart was racing as you struggled to comprehend the weight of his words and the mouthwatering sight he had just unveiled before you.

In fact, nothing else held your interest as much as he did at that moment. He occupied all of your thoughts and consumed your attention entirely. It was like he had a certain power over you that you couldn't resist.

Well.. definitely not, when the veins in his arms were popping out as he stroked his cock vigorously. You swore you could religiously watch him like that all day.

"Look at me, baby," Chris called out to you, instantly pulling you out of your trance. "Look at how hard I will cum."

Accompanied by throaty moans and gasping breaths, Chris came all over his hands and trickled down to his thighs.

#skz smut #stray kids smut #bang chan smut #skz fanfiction #bang chan fanfic #bang chan x reader #chan smut #stray kids fanfiction

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katsukikitten · 8 months

Text

Look I've just been obsessed with him okay. Probs hella out of character and I'm too shy to be the only one in his tag

"Zodel! Zo! Look what I brought!" Your cute excited voice echoes around the dingy hideout as your boss stands with his back to you looking over something 'important'. He's busy you know this but he's always fucking busy.

And he should never be too busy for you.

"I said look." Voice turning dangerous. Slowly his dark eyes glance over his shoulder. His handsome face ever neutral, cold even, as he blinks slowly.

Watches you toss a body at his feet gaining his attention enough that he turns around fully. Eyes sharp as he squats down with his hands dangling between his powerful thighs as he studies the cleaner's body for a moment before he stands back upright.

"I wanted him alive." Zodel's voice is even and smooth, a hint of disappointment, eyes flickering up from the scared face to you. If anyone else had brought this boy he would have cloaked himself in a half deadly shadow and collected another body for to feed the core. Instead he looks at you with his dead eyes and slowblink, "And the jinki?"

"I paused for dramatic effect." You giggle, bringing your hands from behind your back sharp claws wrapped around a small yarn winder. Dramatically changing it's shape to a large staff before slamming the base into the ground, "He called it Tokushin."

Zodel looks unpleased, apathetic but it does nothing to deter your little show and tell.

Slamming the base again for thick rope to reach out far and wide, sure to avoid netting your boss before you twist the staff roughly making a net filled with the other vandals.

"See like a spider." You giggle, it slides down his throat like honey, "And if you twist and twist and twist eventually it can dice them up!"

Smiling wide as Jabber, Noerde, and Bundus struggle in the tight strings.

"The more they struggle the more it hurts them. Isn't this such a great treasure?" You aren't asking Zodel, far from, you're too busy looking up at your latest victims in the jinki you looted from the dead janitor, having wanted it since you first laid your greedy eyes on it.

"You stupid bitch, wind it tighter so I can cum." Jabber shudders as he squirms, sharp claw pinned to his body awkwardly making it impossible to poison himself to make this little experience even better. The rope cuts into his skin and he groans too loudly.

"You should try to fight without all of these little tricks girl. Be a warrior." Noerde hisses, long hair wrapped around herself as tight as the rope unable to discharge a deadly shock without her comb that she tightly grips in her hands. All the while Bundus stays silent and unmoving waiting for your little demonstration to be over.

"Is this all you've brought me?" There's that damn bored even tone. It strikes a nerve that has your hand gripping around the pole tighter. The wood groaning in your grip before you wind the rope tightly until everyone is wrapped around the pole before launching it at Zodel. He doesn't move, doesn't even flinch when it lands right between his feet and through the previous owner's body.

"I don't see anybody fucking else with anything!" You growl, temper flaring because he doesn't appreciate the treasure you've brought him. The food for the core and your chest is heaving.

"Release them." Eyes darker now, voice rougher as he holds your defying gaze.

"No." You snarl, crossing your arms as you glare up at him. You weren't releasing those useless vandals, they weren't a raider like you! To be a raider you actually had to fucking bring home something.

Isn't that what boss wanted? Information? Bodies? Jinki?

He moves faster than you can blink, half of his body shrouded in shadow as he grabs at your jaw roughly. Black fingers digging into your soft cheeks as he comes closer to your face to make sure you'd hear him this time.

"Release. Them." It takes another moment of silence and his grip to begin to bruise your pretty face before you finally obey. The rope disappears and the jinki clatters onto the ground as a small wooden yarn winder once more.

He doesn't even need to give his command to Kutohni to warp the other three vandals away to leave you alone with an angry Zodel. Black eyes boring into yours before they start to scan your face, your skin, and it's only then does he notice the rope burns and scabbed over cuts.

A particularly nasty one on your throat, jerking your jaw in his grip to better see the injury as you glare up at him from the corner of your eye. Leaning closer to your throat before he presses his lips gently to the bruised skin above the open wound. Slowly the shroud around him retreats back into the black coat he wears before he's palming the back of your head.

Pulling you into the safety of his chest, his jacket as he wraps the old fabric around you waiting for you to latch onto his torso like normally did.

"You fought hard for these treasures." He lets his hand follow the curve of your skull as he speaks, voice almost soft making your stomach flutter with excitement especially when he adds, "You did well princess."

You snap up to look at him as if you hadn't heard him correctly, rarely ever giving you praise let alone the nickname you've asked him, and only him, to call you.

Eyes darting between his before they fall to his soft lips and for a moment you swear you see the corner of his mouth twitch up.

#Zodel x reader #Zodel typhon x reader #gachiakuta zodel

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apollosgiftofprophecy · 9 months

Note

What made you fall in love with Copollo and how can we angst this with Hypollo?

I had to marinate this in my head for a bit haha

First - What Made Me Love Copollo?

I don't know if I have the words for it, but I shall try! XD

First of all, I do love me some of that simple, satisfying ships that make you smile - ie, Percabeth - but -

But. But.

There's something about those toxic relationships that are so interesting.

And Copollo has an especially interesting dynamic - Commodus is the more toxic one, but Apollo's the one with all the power. Usually it's only one person with both those things but it's split between them (and note: I said Commodus was the more toxic one - Apollo was also toxic. he was enabling Commodus.)

So the dynamic is one reason. But I also just...love their story.

They relate to each other on a level rarely reached. They had a genuine relationship that was more than carnal, or even just affectionate. They loved each other, and I do think Commodus had just as much of an effect on Apollo as Daphne and Hyacinthus did.

I mean come on.

Apollo gets nervous around trees because of Daphne = Apollo doesn't like water because of Commodus.

Apollo describes Hyacinthus as perfect = Apollo has thought of Commodus as perfect.

It's all right there^^^^

And with Apollo, it's like he's caught in this "I can fix him" / "he can make me worse" mindset.

With Commodus, he's been seeking validation his whole life and clings to Apollo's when it's given to him - and his sanity spirals when he looses it.

They're that perfect mix of "match made in heaven" and "match made in hell". They would have worked but they also could not.

It's just. such a tragedy. which FITS because ya know, Greek Tragedy TM ;)

AND OF COURSE THEIR INTERACTIONS ARNUMNUMNUM!!!!!

How they're so very casual with each other in that flashback. Apollo's bouncing grapes off Commodus's nose for crying out loud THEY'RE IN LOVE YOUR HONOR-!

And then. In ToA. urhhhhhh it's so good. Commodus is That Ex with a picture of his ex on a dartboard. SERIOUSLY. and he THROWS KNIVES AT IT.

LIKE COME ON HOW MUCH MORE JILTED EX CAN YOU GET?

"dear heart", anybody? DEAR HEART? REMEMBER THAT?! I DO!!! LIVES RENT-FREE IN MY HEAD!!!!!

also the two innuendos in TDP and TTT are so good like come on Rick you know what you did there

and then. their final scene together. it's just. ARGHURHMMRM

Apollo reminisces on how he used to hold Commodus's hands with love. Commodus is so fucking eager to take a shot at him. Apollo screams him to death like omfg and the last thing - the last thing - Commodus hears is Apollo's pent-up heartbreak.

May I emphasize Apollo's pent-up heartbreak. HIS HEARTBREAK OVER THE LAST FEW MONTHS YES BUT ALSO HIS LIFETIME. WHICH MEANS COMMODUS IS LITERALLY GIVEN A FACE-FULL OF PROOF THAT APOLLO STILL CARED FOR HIM.

Two people in love, and their love going so wrong when one betrays the other - killing them! - and the other is suddenly hellbent on revenge?

It's all about that lovers to enemies, everybody. Enemies to lovers is good and all but what about loves to enemies.

It's so good armnumnum.

GAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH I LOVE THEM OKAY I LOVE THESE BISEXUAL BITCHES MJHYJUFGH

inhale

exhale

i'm good now. ahem inspects ask angst it with Hyapollo now, eh?

Let's see here...

Well for one Commodus is 100% jealous of Hyacinthus. Like sorry I'm not moving from this hill I will die on this hill you will have to climb up this hill and drag me off it kicking and crying and screaming and clawing you. I'm not moving. crosses arms and sits down pouting

Meanwhile, in the Hyacinthus department, I think Hya would just...not really care? Or well, he'd care about how Apollo took the whole arc but he wouldn't be like "oh no he moved on :(" about it (Poly Apollo is canon y'all i don't make the rules!). more like "bitch you think I give a shit about you?" at Commodus. "YOU'RE NOT WORTH MY TIME!"

I also find it funny if it's this:

this hasn't really turned out as angst but the comedic potential is too good lmao XD

#the oracle speaks #my memes #copollo #hyapollo #apollo #commodus #hyacinthus #the trials of apollo #toa apollo #toa commodus #pjo apollo #pjo hyacinthus #toa hyacinthus #pjo commodus #trials of apollo

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indybob · 9 months

Text

I’m bored on a Saturday night so here’s a random snippet from chapter 3 of “Maybe We Were Always Meant To Be” with Mav being a Dad™️ and helping Bradley with his massive crush on Jake!!

As Maverick finishes a story, Jake drains the last of his beer, “Either of you want me to grab y’all another drink?”

“Would you mind setting a water bottle on the table for me?” Maverick asks.

“Sure thing,” Jake says, walking back toward the hangar.

“Will you grab one for me, too?” Bradley calls after him.

“You got it, darlin’.” Jake’s voice slips back into that slight Southern accent as he uses the pet name.

Bradley blushes then turns back to Maverick, who raises his eyebrows knowingly before returning his attention to the grill.

“Shut up,” Bradley mutters.

Maverick raises his hands, defensively, “I didn’t say a thing.”

“You didn’t have to. The look said it all.”

Maverick sighs in exasperation, slumping his shoulders and giving his attention to Bradley. “So, you like Jake—big deal. He clearly likes you, too.”

“Mav,” Bradley pleads.

“Bradley,” Maverick mimics.

Bradley scoffs, “You don’t get it.”

“What don’t I get?” Maverick asks, sincerely. “Lay it out, kiddo. It’s just me and you.”

“This whole thing with me and Jake just isn’t as simple as you make it out to be,” Bradley complains.

“Well, why not? Help me understand, Baby Goose.”

Bradley blows out a deep breath, deciding the only thing he can do is tell Maverick the truth, “I’m in love with him, Mav.”

Maverick simply smiles, “I knew it.”

Bradley groans in frustration, “Is it that obvious?”

Maverick chuckles, “To me, and probably anybody who’s not you or Jake, yes. But you two are both locked in your own little world of obliviousness, so I’d say he doesn’t know either.”

“So, what am I supposed to do then?”

Maverick considers that a moment, “Kiddo, I don’t think you have to do anything. You could let this whole thing with Jake be a mess of one-sided pining, or you could take a chance. I really think he likes you, Bradley.”

“I’m just scared that he won’t feel the same and I’ll ruin the friendship we’ve rebuilt. Or it will work for a while, but that I’ll fuck it up in the long run.”

Maverick flips the burgers on the grill again, then turns back to Bradley. “Look, things like this—love and relationships—have always ended with me learning the hard way. It doesn’t have to be that way with you and Jake. Don’t let those fears hold you back from taking a chance. I know what it’s like to live with that regret. And, since you’re as good as my son, it’s my job to warn you against repeating my mistakes.”

“You really do think it’s worth the risk?” Bradley asks, hopefully.

“I do, kiddo. And it’s a different time now. You and Jake are blessed to not have to fear for your careers over how you feel about each other. I wasn’t so lucky. I told myself that the fear of losing my career was what held me back for so many years, but it was me too. I was scared to try with Ice. And, well, you know how that ended up.” Maverick’s voice breaks at the end of the sentence.

“Fuck, Mav. I didn’t mean to bring up—“

Maverick raises up a hand, effectively shushing Bradley. “It’s okay. I want you to know that so you can learn from it. I would hate for you to have to experience the regret that Ice and I both had for years over not doing something about our feelings. I know he loved Sarah, but I never stopped wondering what might have been. Don’t make that same mistake, Bradley, please.”

Bradley can feel himself starting to tear up just at the thought of all that Maverick has lost along the way. Sure, Maverick has Penny now, and he knows that they love each other, but like Maverick said, he still wonders what could have been.

Damn it. Maverick’s right. Bradley won’t be able to live with himself if he lets the chance pass him by, never knowing what could have been between him and Jake. That same regret that Maverick lives with…Bradley honestly doesn’t think he’d be strong enough to handle it.

“Maybe you’re right,” Bradley concedes.

Maverick chuckles, slightly tearfully, “With this, I know I am.”

“I just wish I could be as sure as you.”

“Bradley, do you know what makes me so sure?”

“Years of experience?” Bradley ventures.

Maverick shrugs, “Well, yes, but also, it’s the way you two look at each other. When you’re not looking Jake looks at you like you’ve hung the moon. Like you’re the most beautiful, perfect person that’s ever walked the Earth.”

Bradley blushes, trying to brush it off, “I don’t know about that.”

Maverick gives him a pointed look. “And the looks you give him? It’s exactly how your dad used to look at your mom when they were dating and for the several years they were married. He loved her so much, and I can see that same love in your eyes when you look at Jake.”

Maverick finishes up with the burgers on the grill, setting them on a plate. Once Maverick’s hands are free, Bradley brings him in for a grateful hug. “Thanks, Mav.”

“Of course, Baby Goose. Be confident, and when you get the chance, make that man yours.”

#dadmav #my writing #my fanfic writing #hangster fanfiction #writing wip #hangster #sereshaw #bradley rooster bradshaw #jake hangman seresin #pete maverick mitchell #top gun maverick

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darcytaylor · 2 months

Note

I don't understand why they keep ragging on Luke in spaces where he can see it. What's the end goal here? For him to snap and quit the show? People aren't thinking.

The whole situation has been very weird and emotionally charged. I tried to stay away from any of what was happening yesterday. (although I was sent things and have an idea of what is going on)

I think people had an image of who they thought Luke was and since it is not aligning with who he actually is, people are angry. When people are angry people do and say things that maybe shouldn't be said and done.

People's inability to realize that who they created in their mind is not entirely who Luke is (which doesn't have to be a bad thing), is causing outrage. People don't like to be duped, I think people think they were duped.

I have stated multiple times on this blog that people are flawed, people make mistakes, people are nuanced, people can be a bunch of things at once, people can be contradictory in personality, people are complex. All of which Luke is, all of which humans are.

Do I think that Luke hooking up with young adults is a charming trait? No, definitely not. Can I clearly see some questionable actions? Yes, I do have eyes. Do I think that Luke should have kept that shit on his private social media account? Yes, he definitely should have and could have.

But does this actually effect me in any way? No, I don't know the man, and all of us only see a very small part of who he actually is. It shouldn't come to a shock to know that Luke isn't perfect, he's not that version of who they created in their mind.

I know that Nicola has described Luke as being a certain way (people have clung to this), but then people also need to realize that he also has some bad qualities (obviously Nicola wouldn't state those publicly, why would she do that?). I always try to keep in mind that people are good and at the same time people are bad, everybody has both qualities in them.

There is also the belief that if someone who you are a fan of gets any hate, people need to come to their rescue (and vice versa), and while I do think that it is okay to show support or even lack thereof (within reason), this is what riles up every part of any fandom. If people didn't have people to engage with, or people who rile them up, they would get bored and move on.

You have two different groups with opposite opinions, fighting to make their voices the loudest, wanting people to hear them and not the other way around. But this ultimately makes the whole situation loud and for anybody to hear and read. Sometimes coming to someones defence is only going to cause more issues. It's going to create that dialogue and create a space for people to spiral.

So for people who like Luke and for people who don't like Luke, lets all just take a step back and breathe. If you see something you don't like, maybe try not to engage.

I also think that Luke has been trained and told about this aspect of his career. He has been told and has probably seen things like this happen. I don't think that this is what would make Luke quit the show, but I do believe that this will make him less inclined to post or engage with fans on social media.

I actually think that is a good thing (yay for having a positive) in Luke's situation, because it may also filter down into his friend group and relationship and have them stop with the social media games.

#luke newton #bridgerton

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kaslovestsuki · 1 year

Note

Could I request a tsukishima x reader where hes mean so mean to everyone else but the reader? Like— he can't be mean to her even if he tried

YES, I LOVE THE IDEA OF THIS SMMM

! Fluff writing for Baby Tsukishima!

Fem! Reader

Warnings: none

He never understood why you effected him so much but you did. He could never seem to keep his snarky attitude up when you were with him, but in a way it was comforting.

"HEY, WHY DO YOU GOTTA BE SO MEAN?!" Tsukishima laughed at the short ginger as he kept complaining. "Because it's just too easy, plus I'm surprised you're smart enough to even comprehend my sarcasm." Kei snickered as he kept teasing poor Hinata. "Oh!, Hey y/n what are you doing here?" Kei seemed to have frozen up hearing your name. "I'm just here for Tsukki, he left something in the classroom." You slowly walked towards him and he still didn't dare to move a muscle. "Hey Tsukki, here's your headphones. You seriously need to remember to bring them with you." You lightly laughing as you spoke. "T-thank you, y/n." Everyone seemed shocked at how nice he was to you. You said by to the other members and left. "Oooo Tsuki's got a girlfriend~" he glared at Tanaka for the statement making the man freeze. "She's not my girlfriend, so shut your trap." He walked off to out his headphones away and get ready for lunch. He always knew where to find you during lunch, on the roof. You were eating lunch as you heard the metal door creak open and turning to see the tall blonde. "Oh hey Tsukishima, what are you doing up here?" He just gave you a small glance and sat down. "Hey y/n, can I ask you something?" He still wouldn't look at you and you couldn't help but to be somewhat worried. "Yes of course you can." You smiled slightly. "If someone confessed to you....what would you say?" He looked up at you with pink painting his face. You couldn't help but smile seeing him so adorable. "I'd turn them down because I always have my sights set on someone." He seemed to have broken at that statement and before you could explain he had already gone. "Hey Tsukki, wanna hang out after school today?" He knew that voice, his childhood best friend, and yet he had so much pent up emotions and snapped. "Tadashi today's really not the day can you just leave me alone for fucks sake." The freckled boy just nodded and walked away. Pretty much anybody that even looked in Kei's direction got lit ablaze. He was on his way out to go home and he noticed what sounded like running heading towards him, before he could even speak your arms were tight around his waist not letting go. "KEI I'M SORRY, I LOVE YOU THAT'S WHAT I WAS MEANING I'M SORRY FOR NOT SAYING IT SOON ENOUGH!" As much as he wanted to be sarcastic and be a bitch he just couldn't muster up the courage to do it. He loved you too much to ever say anything harsh towards you. He slowly hugged you back and putting his head in your neck, "It's okay, I'm sorry for running off without letting you explain. I should've let you talk before I got upset." You both stayed silent for a while and just held each other until you pulled away to look up at him. "I really do love you Kei." He couldn't help but to blush at your words, he never thought he'd hear you say. "I love you too, y/n...I always have."

Writer's note: I'm sorry if this is bad, but today had not been my day. I've been struggling with work and family stuff but I'm happy you guys enjoy my work <3

#fandom #fanfic #hq!!#fluff #haikyuu!!#tsukishima x reader #tsukishima kei #tsukishima x you #hq x reader #hq fluff #hq tsukishima

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alyswritings · 1 year

Text

Favoritism

Request: hii! would you be able to write a john b x twinsister!reader story where they both have different perspectives of their dad (like, john b and his dad idolized each other while the dad always left the reader "behind"), maybe moments when their dad disappeared and when he was back? i don't have a lot of ideas but maybe fighting between the reader and john b, or reader and big john and john b taking their dad's side. just something that ends in some kind of comfort lol thank you sm, i love your blog💗

John B Routledge x sister!reader

Summary: Y/N feels like the odd one out.

Warnings: none really

a/n: sorry it took a while for me to get to this! hope y'all enjoy!

(gif not mine)

When Big John went missing, Y/N was effected, of course. But she never took it as hard as her twin brother had. John B was dead set on his father coming back alive some day. Y/N on the other hand wasn't too shocked that they possibly lost their father to his ridiculous gold hunt. It's all he ever really cared about, spending all of his time in it.

Big John always included John B in everything, often leaving Y/N out. The two would spend hours in Big John's office, the man usually brushing Y/N aside whenever she asked to join. It was obvious from a young age that the man favored his son.

Y/N picked up most of the slack when Big John went missing -- making sure the house stayed clean, that John B didn't go off the rails, etc.

"Don't you care that dad's gone? I mean, do you even give a shit?!" John B questions, following his sister into the chateau.

"Why should I? It's not like he would care if I ever went missing." Y/N remarks.

"So you just don't fucking care? What the hell, Y/N?" John B asks.

"John B, why would I be deeply hurt by a man who barely gives me five minutes? Yeah, I was initially concerned, but it's been months! He is gone!"

"No, he isn't!"

"Nobody survives that long, you idiot! Just accept it! Dad is dead!"

Y/N storms into her room and slams the door shut.

- - -

The pogues dropped Sarah and Y/N off at the chateau, the two finding John B asleep on the couch on the porch. While Sarah and John B reunited, John B claiming that he found his dad in Barbados, the three teens are now in the yard.

"Dude, did you get some drugs or something? Are you high right now?" Y/N asks as John B insists that Big John is here.

"Y/N, I'm serious. I found dad." John B insists.

"Okay." Y/N rolls her eyes.

"I wouldn't believe him either." The three look over at the man as he walks over. Y/N freezes, her eyes widening. Sarah lets out a noise of shock while John B immediately questions where his father was.

While Sarah greets her father-in-law, John B continues to question his dad where he was, not receiving an answer.

"Hey, there, sweetheart." Big John greets his dad. "What? No hug for your old man?"

"How in the hell are you alive?" Y/N questions.

"Well, that's a long story." Big John chuckles, pulling her into a hug. "Good to see you again, kid."

- - -

"No. I'm not going with you guys." Y/N denies.

"Why not?" John B asks.

"Because dad gets all obsessive and he gets super annoying and I'm not dealing with it." Y/N says.

"Y/N--"

"Come on, boy." Big John calls to his son. "She don't wanna go, it's her loss, not ours. Probably just slow us down anyway." Y/N rolls her eyes.

"Just go." She tells her brother, going into her room.

- - -

"I'm sorry. You-- you found this and you didn't tell the others?" Y/N asks.

"Yeah." John B mutters.

"Why the hell not?" Y/N questions.

"Dad said it's gotta stay between us." John B says.

"And you're gonna listen to him? John B, what the fuck?"

"Y/N--"

"No! No, they are a huge part in this treasure hunt, and you're not gonna tell them shit? What the fuck is wrong with you? Hell, you won't even tell Sarah?"

"Dad says it's best to keep it small for right now."

"Oh, my God." Y/N rolls her eyes.

"Y/N, we aren't telling anybody about this damn thing! We can't trust anyone!" Big John exclaims.

"I think we can trust our friends who have been there for us through everything!" Y/N yells back.

"No! Now, it's between the three of us! And if you're not happy with that, then get out!" Big John shouts.

Y/N rolls her eyes and turns to her brother.

"John B?" She asks.

John B glances between the two before eventually stepping closer to his dad. Y/N scoffs, ignoring the sting of tears in her eyes that she does her best to hold back.

"Whatever." She mutters, rolling her eyes, and storming out.

- - -

John B and Y/N sit on the dock of the chateau. They got back from finding the city of gold yesterday but haven't talked much since their father died.

"Hey." Y/N mumbles, crossing her legs, slouching.

"Hey." John B whispers.

"You okay?" Y/N asks after a few minutes.

"No." John B answers.

"Yeah." Y/N mumbles.

"I assume you're okay." John B mutters.

"Mm... no. No, not really." Y/N denies.

"I thought you hated him." John B says.

"No. Dislike, sure, but... I loved him. I just... wanted him to love me back." Y/N says. "He never really cared about me that much. Least it didn't seem like it. Always fighting, always getting brushed aside, you getting picked over me. His favoritism was definitely obvious. But him dying... watching him die... it still hurts."

"Yeah." John B mumbles, the two sitting in silence for a little bit.

"Least we're not left wondering this time." Y/N says.

"Mm-hmm." John B nods. "I'm sorry." He tells her. "For taking his side all the time. You were right a lot of the time, but I just... I took his side, anyway. Not that I love him more than you or anything, I just... it was just instinct or something. I didn't want him to get pissed at me or anything either."

"Well, you two are more alike than you think. At least when it comes to the gold sometimes. Granted, if somebody had a gun pointed at your kid, I'm sure you would give up whatever information you had a lot sooner than he did." Y/N says.

"You know I love you, right?" John B asks.

"I know." Y/N gives him a small smile. "I love you, too."

John B wraps his arm around her shoulders, pulling her into his side, and he kisses her on the head.

Taglist: @glxwingrxse @venomsvl @wildieflower @aliciacat20 @allyson15 @gabbylovesreading @mrvlxgrl @star-wars-lover @champomiel @myissuesworld @ironmaiden1313

#john b #john b x sister!reader #john b x sister reader #john b routledge #john b routledge x sister reader #john b routledge x sister!reader #obx #outer banks

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mlmxreader · 4 months

Text

Maybe, Just Maybe | Maximus x gn!reader

『••✎••』

↳ ❝ okay, so "I can tell you like me because you keep staring" and “we’re gonna die here” with maximus pretty please 👀 ❞

: ̗̀➛ You and Maximus have a certain understanding of one another, and maybe that's why you're so fond of each other - or maybe it's because he's wonderful and he thinks you're amazing.

trigger warnings: ̗̀➛ swearing, violence, torture, trauma

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"Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! I'm gonna fuckin' die!"

The words were still ringing in your ear even as you sprawled out on the roof of what was once a petrol station; you almost smiled when the words just bounced around. Poor Maximus had never dealt with a hoard of ferals before and had panicked; but you helped each other through it to get where you were now.

Taking a break for a while to recuperate and get your bearings before carrying on. You could feel his gaze on you, and finally allowed yourself to grin as you hummed lazily.

"I can tell you like me because you keep staring, Max," you told him. "You can just say it, y'know."

Maximus swallowed thickly, as although the Brotherhood had instilled certain views on him, being able to freely express his affection for others - especially those who used to be raiders - wasn't exactly something he was entirely used to being able to do.

He still worried that the words would come out wrong and he would accidentally sound like a dick, but then he thought about how you told him that you went through the same. Raiders weren't allowed to freely express affection, either, and it was always treated as a weakness to be fond of anybody; but you learned, just as Maximus was starting to do so.

"I do like you," he agreed with a nod. "I just... I'm still a little shaken up, I thought... I thought we're gonna die here..."

You shook your head, reaching out and gently patting his knee as you offered a reassuring smile. "We'll be alright, don't worry. We'll learn together, and, y'know... maybe eventually we'll find a little island or something where we can settle down properly... just us two - and a fuck tonne of turrets."

He laughed at that, already feeling more than at ease; you always had that effect on him, being able to just radiate peace and easiness as if it came completely naturally. As if nothing could affect you or break you. But just like him, you had been broken once before.

When you first met Maximus, you were a radier, and even worse, you had a blood contract; between your testimony and the terminal he had hacked after being locked out six times - bloody things were so fiddly and would always lock him out - he had found out about what they did to you.

Beatings, starvation, pulling teeth and nails, breaking bones; constant, around the clock, torture. Maximus had saved you, and you wanted to pay your debt however you could.

You just didn't quite count on growing incredibly fond of him. He was funny, he wasn't a goody two shoes but he wasn't a cunt either, he was... he was so gorgeous when you saw how the setting sun danced across his features and glittered in his dark brown eyes. And his smile?

Oh, fuck.

His smile was prettier than anything you could have ever thought about. It immediately made you feel relaxed and peaceful, immediately made you feel like not only were you safe, but you were home too. How someone like him ever looked twice at you, you weren't sure. You knew that you didn't deserve him. That much was painfully obvious.

"Maybe a dog, too," Maximus said with a smile. "I heard stories, y'know - a super mutant who trains and sells dogs. Apparently, he lives on a downed plane on an island somewhere."

You nodded in agreement. "A dog would be nice... normal."

Maximus sucked in a harsh breath, letting you get closer to him; your head fell to his lap as you closed your eyes and smiled.

He swallowed thickly when he looked down at you, his heart pounding in his chest; you were the most wonderful looking person he had ever set eyes on, and he knew that he didn't deserve you.

You were smart and funny and good looking, your skills with a sniper rifle were all but unmatched and... and fuck, the way you made his heart pound and his hands shake was something he could hardly fathom.

For all it was worth, Maximus really did feel something for you.

"You ever think that maybe there's a chance of it?" He asked quietly. "Being... normal?"

You shrugged as you sought for his hand, holding it gently as you brought it to your chest. "Maybe not in the sense of going back to how things were before the war... but maybe there's a chance we can be normal in a different way."

He nodded, relaxing a little as he thought about how much fucking better it would be. "I'd like to be normal with you, if that's alright?"

You opened your eyes, staring up at him for a moment as you smiled so brilliantly. "I'd love that."

Maximus didn't even know what to say as he gave your hand a small squeeze, swallowing thickly and doing his best not to laugh and jump up; he was so glad that he had found you, and he was so glad that you had found him.

Even though he knew he would never deserve you, he would fight every day to remain at your side because he knew, he knew it like he knew the colour of the sky, that you would always do the same for him.

Maybe that was all that mattered anyway - not deserving or anything like that. But being willing to fight for one another when the cards were down; being willing to do anything to keep each other safe.

He liked the sound of that, and he knew that if he said it, you would have, too; but with the sun starting to set and the tiredness starting to creep in, Maximus knew that such words would have to wait for another day.

But for now, he could take comfort in knowing that you were there with him; you were there to give him understanding, comfort and support when he needed it the most.

if you made it to the end of this fic and you enjoyed it, then please, if you have any cash to spare, even if it's just a few pounds, then please consider sharing whatever you can to help Mahmoud to rebuild his home.

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alessiathepirate · 11 months

Text

Creep 2014

THE CONSEQUENCES OF A SMALL MISTAKE: Josef x fem!reader

Summary: The butterfly effect - the idea that small things can have big consequences. In her case, a small mistake gave her the opportunity to escape death.

Notes: English isn't my first language. I apologize for any mistake I may have made while I wrote this short story.

I didn't really plan to write any type of fanfiction or oneshot for this movie, even if I think it's fantastic (including the sequel) and unsettling, but there aren't many works out there for it - so I thought I'd try my best. And after some ideas and motivation, here it is! I hope you'll enjoy it as much as I enjoyed writing it! :)

Warnings: swearing, implied stalking, slightly referenced violence and/or murder, attempted murder

•••

the butterfly effect:

the butterfly effect is the idea that small things can have non-linear impacts on a complex system

or: the idea that the smallest things can have big consequences

°°°

She ran out of coffee. There was none left in the small metal container she usually kept the coffee beans in, and the cheap three in one box was empty as well.

That realization hurt in the morning, especially when she woke up late and knew that she'll be late for work. And the fact that the coffee was gone made the already bad day even worse.

She should've checked it, that's what she told herself as she went through her day without her usual, great cup of coffee. The one they make at her workplace couldn't be called coffee at all and the nearest coffee shop was too far away to go there during her break.

So she had to survive without the coffein she loved.

Such a small thing. A small mistake, a usual occurance - something what can happen to anybody anytime. Yet the consequences of her not checking on the metal container on Sunday were greater than she could've ever imagined.

She was home just before seven. It was already starting to get dark and she was tired. Way too tired to care about anything, to notice the unusual things happening around her or remembering the things she had promised she'd do. She didn't notice the package on her porch, even if the box was big enough to reach past her knees. She walked past it, trying to grab her keys from her bag to open the door.

"You didn't answer my calls..." the voice was so sudden she dropped her keys as her hands shook violently, her eyes no longer tired, but wide open. Her throat felt tight as held onto her bag tightly, her knuckles turning white as she looked around on the porch, examining all the dark corners to decide where to aim with it.

It took a few seconds for her to realize she knew that voice. It wasn't a stranger even if his voice did sound strange from time to time, it was high pitched when he was excited and he was excited at the weirdest moments.

"For fucks sake, you scared the Hell out of me!" she spoke up, her voice rough - then, after she realized how rude she must've sounded, she apologized with a small, tired smile: "I had a long day, I didn't mean to shout at you."

Her expression changed, going back to its exhausted self. She let go of her bag, letting it sit on her shoulder as she crouched down to find her keys.

Then the guy she knew as Josef walked closer to her, showing her which dark corner he was hiding in. He let the shadows draw dark shapes onto his face before he too crouched down, immediately finding the keys she was looking for.

"Thank you." she said as she took them from him, standing back up to open the door.

"It's okay." he was unusually quiet as he observed her every move, even after she stepped inside, leaving the door open for him. "No movie night then?"

She stopped, for a second feeling very much awake as she gently hit her forehead with her hand.

"Fuck, I totally forgot about it." for a moment she looked like she's about to cry. "I'm one poor excuse of a friend." she kicked her shoes off and let her bag fall to the ground as she quickly disappeared into the house - her voice had an unusual pitch to it as she shouted back: "Do you want some tea or something? Hot chocolate maybe? Heck, that's the least I can do - I'm so sorry."

Even in her tired and pityful mood she still knew that in the next few seconds Josef will turn up somewhere - behind her, next to her, in the other room when she leaves the kitchen. He did that a lot, scaring her either as a plan or as an accident. This was the case that time too.

"Hot chocolate's fine." she jumped a little, her heart beating faster as his voice came from directly behind her; she could feel his breath on the back of her neck.

Although she said nothing to it, because it had became an everyday thing, she still needed a few moments to collect herself.

"Okay. Give me a moment." she whispered, the sentence having two meanings: Give me a moment to get the hot chocolate done and Give me a moment to collect myself after you scared me.

"Did you order something?" Josef asked as he walked around the kitchen, looking at all the appliences and touching some of them even if he's seen them many times before.

"What do you mean?" she furrowed her eyebrows as she got the mugs ready, not understanding his question. She didn't order anything.

"You have a package on the porch."

"Great." she muttered, her tiredness showing once again. "Must be the wrong address. But whatever, I'll deal with it tomorrow."

She couldn't see him, but she heard his breathing and his steps as she melted some chocolate and poured some milk into the mugs.

" 'You sure?"

Why wouldn't I be?

"Yeah. I've got a movie night to make up for." she smiled as she added some cream to the drinks; she then turned towards him, her smile not disappearing at all even her eyes hurt a bit. "I don't have any popcorn, but we can still watch something if it's okay."

They both looked at the other, neither of them blinking as if they'd like to win a sudden challenge. He tilted his head, examining her posture or gestures - she couldn't tell, but she felt like she's telling him more than she'd like to.

His gaze was strange. Everything was more unusual about him ever since he turned up on her porch. She didn't necessary like it, but she didn't dare to point it out either.

And then suddenly, as if someone just pressed a switch in him, he smiled. More like grined. His whole mood changed in a second - and the oddness of it activated her fight or flight reflex. The fear ran through her fast, it made her shiver and her hands twitch slightly.

She has never been afraid of him before. Maybe she should've - her instincts told her.

"It's okay." his grin stayed and it made her feel like prey. "Let's watch something."

"Yeah." it wasn't more than a whisper for herself to gain her strength back as she watched Josef leave the kitchen - she soon followed him with the mugs. "So- what'll we watch?"

"'Interview with the Vampire'?" she looked at him as she put down the mugs on the coffee table right in front of the TV, and she couldn't help but let out a tired, half-annoyed sigh despite the coldness that ran through her back.

"Again?" she asked with a small, but knowing smile and even if the weird feeling didn't leave her chest, it was still an honest one. "We watched it last week too."

"Please?"

She just shook her head with a weak smile and was already on her way to connect the old DVD player to the TV, and then look for the cheap copy of the movie. She didn't have to look for long. It was right where they left it last week after he had gotten bored and pressured her into taking a walk around the neighborhood late at night.

"All right. Just because I owe you- and you're one of the few people I actually care about."

After everything was set and the first shot appeared on the TV, she finally sat down on the couch and leaned back - both her worry and hot chocolate forgotten as her limbs were finally stretched and resting. That was when she really felt the missing doses of coffein; her whole body felt heavier than usual now that she was past the hard part of the day. Now that she could see the familiar actors and hear the familiar lines; now that she could feel Josef's thigh against her own, she finally started to give up.

It felt too nice and comfortable. She doubted that she can wait out the whole two hours and two minutes - she had seen the Interview with the Vampire so many times she knew everyhing about it by heart - without falling asleep.

But until then, she could talk, to keep Josef entertained. He had to be entertained unless she wanted to wake up to him scaring her and having a heart attack.

"Did you do anything interesting today?" she asked as she slowly sat up to reach her drink.

"Sure. I shot a short film for the collection."

"Well, at least you had a more exciting day then I had." she yawned. "Will you show me some of it? Someday..."

"Someday." maybe if she was more alert, she would've seen the change in his tone and gestures.

She put the mug back down. The movie continued. They stayed quiet.

Unusually quiet.

Josef is very rarely calm and silent. He either has to be in a bad mood or has to be very tired. And as she looked at him from the corner of her eyes she couldn't see any of it.

And then, later, the more tired she was, the more alert he became. His back straightened, but not from the excitement she came to know - from something else, something new; something she hasn't seen before.

Seemingly, he was thinking. She knew it from the way the muscles around his mouth moved. But she couldn't tell what was on his mind. It must've been something big and serious. She didn't dare to ask.

"You know..." her eyes were halfway closed when Josef spoke up. "I really thought you wouldn't care if we missed this movie night."

"Why wouldn't I?"

"You're tired."

"So?" she asked. "I'm always the tired one. You simply have more energy. Besides, it's just the addiction - coffee is a pretty strong drug." she chuckled quietly.

"I was thinking, maybe I'll keep you as my friend." if she noticed the dark tone of his voice, she didn't give it away at all.

"Well it's really nice of you to think so Josef, since we've been friends for the last two months." she turned towards him, her lips slightly curling upwards. "But I'll be happy if you keep me."

"I might."

And then soon, she was gone.

Her eyes closed, because she couldn't keep them open any longer and her whole being relaxed; her body didn't feel heavy anymore.

Perhaps she should have been worried. Scared - to fall asleep. But that's not how it went down, she gave up the fight with sleep and even if she lost, that's what saved her life.

The Interview with the Vampire kept on playing on the TV, the light from it made it possible to see in the room. Five minutes went by, then ten. And suddenly her head was resting on Josef's shoulder.

If she was awake, she would've noticed how stiff his posture has become or how he almost moved further away from her. But in the end he stayed and after he worked on his position on the couch, he decided to put aside the knife he had in his hand.

He slightly moved his head so his chin wouldn't touch the top of her head as he found the right angle to examine her from. He had seen her do a lot of stuff. He had seen her cook and clean, go to work and to the store or do whatever she liked to do in her free time - all without her knowledge. He hadn't seen her sleep yet.

She seemed calm, trusting. But then again every single person looks calm in his or her sleep. Trusting on the other hand - not many people would put their trust in him. Only the very naive or stupid ones. But he knew she wasn't stupid, nor naive. She had a decent job, a decent life and she didn't talk to everyone. Yet she talked to him.

He raised one of his hands and took hold of a lock of hair softly. He twisted it around his fingers and then awkwardly petted her head.

There was no fun in killing her in that moment. She was asleep. She hadn't seen the package yet. She hadn't seen the VHS tape he put in it. There wasn't enough fear in her yet.

But then again there was something else. There was trust and perhaps, just perhaps it may be more interesting than fear. It for sure felt nicer than her fear.

He brushed his fingers along the outline of her face as if he'd like to know every single bone or wrinkle. He stayed there and raked his fingers through her hair and smelled it too.

Later he put his knife away.

And after he put her in a more comfortable position on the couch, he went outside to get to the package before she does. He cut it open and after he retrieved the necklace he put in it, he set the rest of it aside. He'll get rid of it before she wakes up.

Maybe if she trusts him this much she'll like it.

If she likes him this much she'll definitely like it.

He sat down next to her on the couch again, his gaze was once on the movie and once on her.

That's what it took her to avoid death.

Her forgetfulness, her addiction and her trust. One simple mistake.

And after unknowingly escaping death, she's got an even clingier and stranger Josef than before.

But then again, it's still better, isn't it?

#creep 2014 #creep movie #josef x reader #josef creep x reader #josef #josef creep #josef x fem!reader #josef creep x fem!reader

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