#the one where the autistics and the genderqueers are from

[speakercrab666]

furries i hope u know i am fighting for u out here. i am putting my life on the line and i am dying for u out here. i love u. all u motherfuckers got a friend in me. i’m a passionate and deeply autistic man, furries, and u are my cause. DON’T LET NO ONE GET U DOWN, FURRIES.

[badass-queer-couples-battle]

Sword gays showdown, round 2, bracket three

Propaganda:

For Xie Lian:

The BIGGEST nerd about swords and swordfighting and martial arts it's his special interest and he's incredibly good at it! He ascended to godhood because of his prowess. He can literally defeat people with powers in swordfighting at a time he has no powers of his own. Talks people's ears off about swordfighting and recommends what specific weapon is best for them. Definitely has sword related trauma for *reasons* and doesn't like actually using them to harm anymore, but that doesn't mean he's not still incredibly skilled at using them when he needs to. And he'll still gush over any sword you give him to look at ❤️. A great quote from the book is: The Flower-Crowned Martial God: Sword in one hand, flower in the other. [they] only remembered the flower, but had forgotten:  Xie Lian ascended because of his sword.

Xie Lian basically has a special interest in swords. He's literally so good at using swords that the only person on par with him was the Heavenly Emperor and that was when he was 17!!!! He is LITERALLY "The Flower Crowned Martial God, Sword in One Hand, Flower in the Other". He knows everything about every kind of sword and all the history of every sort of legendary sword. His husband gifts him a whole armory full of swords and he spends a few hours geeking out about it. He's so good at swords he came up with a special technique to absorb the blow from two other swords so that only he himself is harmed but the other two he's trying to get to stop fighting Aren't harmed, and it's so special that he's *recognized* by it even after centuries. He also got stabbed by a sword a hundred times in one night does that count. He REALLY loves swords and is SO good at swords. He's the sword boy.

He is so incredibly autistic about swords. The author descibes him as a sword otaku. He canonically had a massive collection of swords in his youth that he carted around everywhere and wore a different one each day so they would all be appreciated. His love interests most successful flirtation was showing him his armory and just letting him run around picking everything up and infodumping about swords for several hours. Also he could wreck anyone. AND he's gay.

For Ballister:

he could tell when his sword was switched out for a fake, graduated top of his class so we know he's a good fighter, also the scene where he's fighting is hot because he's so confident with a sword in his hand, also he's gay

A canonically gay, disabled, South Asian man takes down the government with his genderqueer shapeshifter sidekick/adopted daughter! He has a swordfight with his ex-boyfriend! in which he defeats about 20 knights singlehandedly! 

top of his knight class this man is a master swordsman

(Movie) He has used a sword since he broke into the Institutes training ground and ended up becoming a knight

He has very divorced vibes with Ambrosius and he uses a sword.

He's a legit knight! So, it's in the fine print.

According to the Nimona movie, Ballister here has been practicing the art of sword fighting since childhood to earn the trust of the city and he was SO CLOSE to becoming a knight. He's also definitely not dating another one of his knight mates (?). Nope. Not at all. This movie is super straight /s I think he also beats an entire army of knights with nothing but his sword and a chaotic good shapshifter so that's pretty cool. He's also south Asian, has a prosthetic arm he made himself and is honestly such a goofy guy (in a good way ofc) if that's anything.

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

i don't know how to sum this up. i haven't slept in four days.

...this is gonna be a long one and im sorry. also literally every fucking one in this whole thing minus V is autistic, i don't know how, but them's the facts.

background info: around... some 8 years ago maybe, my truly BELOVED friend M (today 31F) started hanging out with a new friend group her then-friend S (31F now) had introduced her to.

(i (31 genderqueer) didn't know M then. i do know she was very lonely.)

so. S has introduced M to her friend group, and M hangs out with them for about... two years?, but, as far as i understand, S is the go-between here. M asks S what plans they have on weekends, S calls M when there's plans on weekends, that sort of thing.

what happens is: at one point S's girlfriend, V, starts flirting with M. heavily. in front of S. S VERY MATURELY decides that the solution to this is obviously to start telling M there's never plans on weekends while telling the friend group M is never free on weekends. shitty move, i think we can all agree.

and M ends up alone. she's never heard from a single one of any of those other people ever again. ever.

now. M, OBVIOUSLY and i think with good enough reason, HATES S.

but.

1) it's not S's fault M is no longer friends with the whole group, like M thinks it is. it's just not. if they had wanted to keep hanging out with her, very simply, they would have. S didn't even explicitly ask or tell them not to hang out with M, nor did she talk shit about M to get them to leave her out. and want to know why we know all this? it's because after (AFTER!) S and V broke up, M and V dated for like, three months, and V told M. what S did was shit and immature, but not like. extreme.

2) we don't know if S even knew how lonely M was/was gonna be. in my understanding of what's right or wrong, this is KIND OF REALLY important. the intention, the meanness, the ability to knowingly isolate someone to that degree. jealousy is one thing, being genuinely mean is another.

3) all of this happened 10 years ago. TEN. YEARS. they were like, 20. fetuses. we're all queer, they were all navigating the first romantic experiences, shit happens. S was shit but S also could have become a better person in these TEN YEARS. we just don't know.

OTHER background info: ive known S for like, 10 years, and she's someone VERY interesting who i've always liked (not romantically), but she's not my friend.

ok, and now. fast forward to last week. M & i & F1 (27F, my bestie, M's friend) go to a pub. S is there, says hi to me, hi to M (which. like at least apologize or something. but ok) (at this point i have no idea they even knew each other btw), S & i talk a bit like we always do, M goes home (i suspect nothing), S & F1 & i hang out, next thing u know F1 and S start to date and S and i become better friends.

(where i absolutely am the A: apparently, at some point M told me what S did to her. before we met S at the pub? after? i have NO memory of any of this.)

M wants nothing to do with S, as is her right. but at this point F1 is dating her and im making plans to like, watch clone wars with her. M tells me & F1 the whole story (tells again, in my case), tells us she has no problems with us hanging out with S but again, please can we not force them together, which, ofc, i tell her about our star wars plans and like, she's chill, she says yeah sure go for it, she jokes around about how S knows lots of people and we gotta use her to get another friend a girlfriend, shit like that.

forward again. one sunday morning, M asks me to hang out. that sunday just so happens to be clone wars day with S & F1. i tell her. she goes BALLISTIC. like, tachycardia, tunnel vision, palpitations, she's fully ready to never talk to me again because "i can't ask [me] to not hang out with S because that would be toxic, but i just CAN'T be around S, so here we go again, she's gonna steal my friend [me] (...i don't think M cares too much about losing F1, they're not that close), im losing control of the situation, the only way for me to stay in control is to choose to cut off [me] right here and now, so that's what ill do, goodbye forever". and she spends the WHOLE DAY in this frenzy (completely unbeknownst to me!), with multiple people trying to calm her down and like, get her to talk to me. (which OF COURSE the next day she ends up doing, because she loves me, she's just. very autistic.) anyway, at this point (sunday evening) ive been made aware of the situation with M, so i had F2 (F31, she's a mutual close friend who was acting as a kinda peacemaker) tell M i was there for her & ready to talk whenever, and we meet up on monday evening, i get apologized to (M had like, blocked me on all social media 😂) for the whole... overreaction, especially after id been told it was ok to see S, and M officially asks me to stop hanging out with S. i try to tell her "can i ask S about, idk, what was going on in her brain back then". she starts to hedgehog up on me so i shut tf up.

here i am the A again: i know M very well. i should have known it would not actually be okay to see S. i just should have. i do know her.

here i... can't tell how much of an A i might be: i don't want to tell S to fuck off. i WANT to talk to S, figure out how much of an actual irredeemable asshole she is, and only in that case tell her to fuck off. the 3 points i made at the start of this papyrus are still valid. also i think it's kind of fair to give her the right to like, defend herself? explain herself? before i go full ghost on her

... its like this. it's not like i care about S. not to be mean but she's no one to me. i just would like her to BE someone to me, cause she seems cool.

i have few friends. i would like one more friend.

i also made friends with a friend of S, T (can't remember age NB). they're the only other genderqueer person i know irl. id like to get to know them. (also they're kind of cute but that's genuinely not that important lol, i just like to make this post Even Longer). i wouldn't get to know T if i did what M wants (needs?) me to.

and let's not forget S is currently dating my close friend F1. just to put icing on the cake.

then again, i adore M. my loyalty to her SHOULD be more important than two people who are, again, no one to me. i should just tell F1, sorry, i won't hang out with ur gf, like ill be civil to her but i won't pursue a friendship with her. because i don't NEED to. i don't NEED these friendships. i would just LIKE them.

if S turns out to BE an asshole who hurt M on purpose, it's great, it's golden. problem solved. ill tell her she's shit and, i mean, F1 will probably break up with her too. no one gained or lost anything from a whole shebang were i haven't slept in like 4 days and got a stress herpes or whatever it's called, it's cool, it happens, go us.

but if S is... justifiable? understandable? NOT a dick? i don't feel i have an actual reason to delete her number. would i, for M? probably, yeah, but i don't WANT to.

F1 says im a doormat. F2 says im basically a monster and how could i do this to M when there's plant of other friendly fish in the sea.

AITA?

and while we're at it, if someone feels like giving advice... what do i do?

What are these acronyms?

[daybringersol]

alloaro book recs !

took some time but alright ! well first i gotta say, i havent read any of them (yet), but i will try to find reviews online.

this is mostly based on this database (link) i found, cuz im gonna be so honest with you, its straight up the only place where i could find that information.

Commit to the kick by Tris Lawrence

Urban fantasy. Lead is a demiromantic gay man. Found family. Queer-platonic partnership, though not defined that way (not sure what that means either). Writer is a queer woman. 4.7/5 on Goodreads (link), though only with 7 ratings. Seems batshit insane tbh, the guy transforms into a bear, theres clan politics, magic and sports. Can be read online for free here (link) I think? Can also be bought as a book here (link).

Viral airwaves by Claudie Arsenault

Science fiction. One of the main characters is a gay non-binary aromantic person, and has a queerplatonic relationship with a man. Book cover is the colors of the aroallo flag. Writer is an aroace woman from Québec (sorry, that's important to me, I'm québecois). 4.09/5 on Goodreads (link). Can be bought here (link). Look in comments for more info.

The ascencion by A. M. Blaushild

Fantasy, science fiction. One of the main characters is a bisexual aromantic woman. No pairings, only friendships. Author is disabled (chronically ill & autistic) and LGBT+. Can't find that specific book anywhere gonna be honest. Still leaving this here in case I do at some point. Look in comments for more info.

Baker thief by Claudie Arsenault

Fantasy, superhero. Lead is a bisexual aromantic non-binary person. Relationships explored are family, friendship, mentor, queer-platonic relationship (with a woman). Enemies to lovers (?). Lead is mainly attracted to women and femme non-binary genders. Writer is an aroace woman from Québec. 3.95/5 on Goodreads (link). Read it online for 2.99$ USD (minimum) here (link). Can also be bought as a book here (link).

The trouble by Daria Defore

Contemporary, romance, new adult. Lead is an aromantic gay man. Around an indie rock band. Relationships explored are friendships (bandmates), but includes a M/M pairing and explicit sexual content, so I'm guessing it's a friends with benefits situation? I don't know. Written by a most likely queer woman (haven't found her saying it herself but she only writes queer fiction). 3.85/5 on Goodreads (link). Currently unavailable everywhere, including Amazon (link), Ebay (link), Thriftbooks (link), for some reason, which is unfortunate for me because I'd like to read it. First 15 pages are available on Book Read Free (link) though. If you find a way to get it, please link me up.

Mangoverse by Shira Glassman

Fantasy. A series of books. Side character is a straight aromantic woman. Woman-focused, jewish-focused. Don't know if the character is in all the books, and if not, in which ones she is. Her name is Eshvat if that helps. Lots of other queer representation in all the books though. Ratings on Goodreads (link) range from 3.70/5 to 4.35/5.

Holding Onto Day by E. H. Timms

Fantasy, science fiction, paranormal. One of the main characters is a non-binary pansexual aromantic person. Relationships explored are found family and friendships. No pairings. Written by an aroace genderqueer person (she/they). 4/5 on Goodreads (link), though only out of 15 ratings. Involves vampires and werewolves. Only available for kindle on Amazon (link).

Novis by Rachel Tonks Hill

Science fiction. One of the main characters is an allosexual (attraction not specified but I'd assume sapphic) aromantic woman. Relationships explored are queer-platonic (F/F/F) and friendships. Includes moments of microaggressions against aces and aros and a fade-to-black sex scene. Writer is non-binary, bisexual and polyamorous. 4/5 on Bookreads (link), though only out of 9 ratings. Women-focused. Available as a paperback here (link) and as a kindle here (link).

The representative by Ripley Santo

Cuil (link), erotica, dark fantasy, paranormal. One of the leads is a bisexual aromantic man. M/M/F/NB relationship explored (could be romantic or QPR, not sure. probably sexual in nature.). 0 ratings on Goodreads (link). Currently out of print on Amazon (link).

more recommendations in comments !

taglist : @sorting-algorithm

[daandyli0n]

more Rewrite Refs, y'all!! this time: MCI edition!

it is going to become apparent that my favorite Ghost Trope is the "whatever caused your death shows up on you as a ghost" thing

(warnings: child murder/death, blood/gore, bruises, somewhat obvious broken bones (in Felix's ref), eye injury (again, Felix), eye contact, bright colors/eyestrain, disturbing imagery)

this isn't in order of their deaths, but like. animatronic order, i guess

(click on the images to zoom)

design details!! yippee!!

Gabrielle/"Gabi"

the second of the murders.

soul inside of Freddy

transfem, fun fact!

shy and anxious; pretty much the reason Freddy sticks to the shadows.

biracial! mother is from Mexico and her father is black.

family wasn't too wealthy; her clothes were from her older sister.

was one of Elizabeth's friends, and was a kid that Cassidy was close to in the aftermath of Liz's death.

a "popular girl," mostly due to being friends with Naomi and Liz.

died on June 24, 1982; her birthday :(

Baker

the third of the murders.

soul inside of Bonnie.

the youngest; thought he was being taken to see Bonnie :(

AuDHD. no i will not elaborate.

one of Kelsey and Cassidy's closest friends.

one of the calmer spirits, surprisingly.

he thinks the fact that he became Bonnie is one of the coolest things that could've happened (Charlie thinks that it's either a coping mechanism or due to the fact that Baker was too young to really comprehend what happened).

died on June 25, 1982.

Naomi

like Susie, she was The First.

she wasn't the first to die; she was still alive when Gabi was murdered. she was the first victim of the MCI.

soul inside of Chica.

"popular girl," but not...mean. she Does complain about people who annoy her, though. but it's not too often.

like Gabi; best friends with Liz and close to Cassidy.

died on June 24, 1982; tried to warn Gabi, but was stuck inside of Chica and hardly able to even speak. the most she could do were raspy breaths; think along the lines of the noises Chica and Bonnie make when they enter the office in Fnaf 1.

Felix

the fourth of the murders.

soul inside of Foxy.

big fan of Foxy and pirates in general.

the oldest of the original MCI. (Charlie is 12, and three kids in the '87 Murders were 15-16).

genderqueer; "Idgaf what ye call me tbh. Call me whatever ye like, Matey, I don't care-"

was one of the more skeptical kids being lured; wondered why "O'Hare" was leading him to a back room to see Foxy...

was the only kid who really fought back; led to some...worse injuries (bruised, several smaller cuts, hand got broken, missing an eye).

Angry™

died June 25, 1982.

Kelsey

the final murder

one of the souls in Fredbear.

liked to draw! still does, tbh.

shy and anxious (cough autistic) kid.

close friend of Baker and Cassidy.

doesn't...come from a good home.

was at Fredbear's the day he died.

wandered to the Parts & Service room...where William was. got springlocked.

odd, cut-like wounds are from where he was y'know. a young kid in a springlock suit.

William cleaned the suit up and dumped Kel's body in a lake since he couldn't hide him in the suit.

him and Cassidy have a sort of "Comedy/Tragedy" thing with their masks. Kelsey's is much paler, is frowning, and leaks blood instead of the Black Liquid.

fun fact: Kelsey is technically transfem! didn't get to figure it out, unfortunately...but y'know.

anyway!! @that-darn-clown and @hello-there-world if y'all wanna see this :D

[foxglovepng]

Random Headcannons 3 🌼🥀

Requested: naw

Characters: Scarabia + Pomefiore

A/N: I'm getting back into the writing mood yay I'll probably take requests in the future because I am slowly getting over writer's block. I looked up a word in Arabic and if the word is incorrectly translated incorrectly feel free to correct me.

If you liked reblogs and likes are appreciative <3

Kalim

Knock knock who's there? Autism br br br where the hoes at? not here

I love my Autistic headcanon for Kalim. I also saw a headcanon he has ADHD too. (I forgot the word for ADHD and Autism combined help)

When he's unmedicated Jamil is that one meme of Shinji his stress levels are high. He's practically lived with Kalim so he knows he can get hyper although he pushes through it being used to it.

I headcanon Kalim has sensory issues that mainly have to do with touch. (Mine are sound and taste :skull:)

Since he likes parties and is extremely sociable I feel like sometimes he can get overwhelmed he chills in his sensory swing. I also feel like since he plays the drums he does have backup headphones on hand in case it's too loud.

Jamil tends to calm him down with essential oils (Don't ask me what kind he likes I only know Rosemary, and Cherry blossom)

Jamil

Jamil drop the hair routine or I'll break your ankles Sangwoo style so you can't dance anymore. I will even report your music-listening account so you are no longer allowed to play hip hop DROP THE ROUTINE RN JAMIL

This is my no 2 pookie bear I love him sm ANYWAYS

I feel like in his alone time Jamil has his own hobbies he hides from Kalim and will go above and beyond just to have them to himself. One of those I feel like is reading romance books (Not the feral ones booktok gooners read) romance is one of the genres he reads I feel like he also reads fantasy. (He has read Pride and Prejudice)

He'd probably also go to art conventions on his spare time. He has a sketchbook and draws on occasion (I think he draws similar to Hyunjin's style)

Him and Kalim speak Arabic and English although I feel like when Jamil wants to cuss someone out or insult someone he will bring the Arabic out.

*Ace messes up a play*

Ace: so um great play

Jamil: اهبل (Google says this means stupid/idiot)

Ace: HUH?

Vil

*Throws my genderqueer headcannon at you Eminem style*

Gender queer Icon Vil.

If I am correct he is referred to as Queen by Rook?? so I believe Vil doesn't really care for pronouns and just simply exists. So Vil would use any pronouns interchangeably.

Also random headcannon but Vil's father is like..famous right? So I feel like he gets insulted and called a Nepo baby.

Peep Epel and Vil get into a fight and Epel calls him a Nepo baby. Oh all hell is breaking loose.

(I also headcannon he'd make an appearance in Eurovision)

Rook

I need Frenchie to become a slur so I can shout FRENCHIE at Rook 24/7

This man either has a really good memory or a diary in which he keeps info of students. (Their height, weight, UM, etc) its freaky ngl. AND NOT A GOOD FREAKY WAY.

I saw some art of him and Floyd in the bathroom and he was peeking over the urinal. BRO KEEP YA EYES ON YA JUNK.

I can imagine certain NRC students have a group chat dedicated to slandering Rook.

He probably knows about it :Skull:

Epel

Guys this my son <3

I am a firm believer he is an Amish hater.

"I hate the way you talk the way you walk" ahh beat.

From a farmer's perspective I don't think he's 100% vegan, but if you bribe him with bbq he will start foaming at the mouth.

Bro probably listens to Dixon Dallas good looking-

He's also a Dolly Parton and Carrie Underwood fan.

I feel like with people he's close with especially the first years he lets his country accent loose and it will get even looser if someone (or Yuu) has a country accent as well. The rest of the first years will be like "They are speaking in tongues"

[lionmythflower]

Peter pettigrew hcs

he's trans :)

genderqueer and doesn't care what pronouns ppl use for him but he prefers he/they

He's a pudgey little thing but he's fine with it

He's a PROUD 2 inches taller than Sirius lol

asexual (him and evan bond over this)

He brings the best snacks on road trips

Will forget everything but the smallest of details

Like oh he can't really remember ur name but he does know that you played soccer for 2 years when you were in primary school

Hates the snow. Absolutely despises it (same)

Would have loved Lord of the rings

autistic but like the type that like when he tells ppl they're like "rlly? You don't seem autistic."

Hates running with a burning passion

had an eating disorder at some point but he got help for it

Still wears makeup and stuff even though he's trans bc fuck gender roles :)

He's first friends were James and Marlene (I heard someone say barty as well and I love that)

Hates the nickname wormy but is fine with wormtail

Constantly has seasonal allergies

Panic attacks

Yk the one person in troto that plays Peter? Ya that is hands down the best face claim/fan cast

Knows how to crochet

I feel like music would help calm him down

Like during panic attacks or stuff like that

Has hair that's like down to his shoulders but layers

100% had a crush on james when they were kids

Peter,evan, and barty are all besties

PANDORA AND PETER GOSSIP TOGETHER

Peter is the only one that all the girls get along with lmao

So Peter is invited to every girls night bc they love him

He clenches and unclenches his fists when he's angry (HELP THAT ONE MEME PLS)

He knows EVERYTHING. and I mean EVERYTHING. who's dating who, who has a crush on who, who doesn't like who, who pretends not to like who. He knows it all

So does pandora and sometimes lily and they all gossip

Peter, Evan and lily are js a group of trans asexuals. No I will not explain

(I lied, I will explain a bit) "My ribs are bruised again" "same" "lol can't relate" "fuck you Evans" "ilyt rosier" (Peter, Evan, lily, Evan, lily)

Benji is his queer platonic partner :)

HE'S SO GOOD AT COOKING

LIKE EXTREMELY GOOD

Peter cooks for Remus when the full moon hits

And he cooks for james when he's feelings down

and he cooks for Sirius when he's having trouble in anyway w smth

Idc what u say all the marauders loved Peter and they were all equal

Peter would he such a gas lighter 😭😭

"Wdym? That's always been there. Your imagining things. "

Peter and reg are pretty good friends actually lol

"He was a death eater tho!!!" Ok and?

Peter would do that thing where if he's lying down and doing smth he'll always have one arm in the air. No one knows why he does this but their js used to it at this point

Anxiety is a bitch and Peter has it

Ppl thinks he's kinda slow sometimes but it's js cuz he needs to triple check everything and needs clear instructions bc he doesn't want to mess anything up

Would have so many pillows

He loves plants

And mushrooms

James, Marlene and him are all trans and they transitioned together

Painted nails>>>>>

He would have different themes for he's nails each time he painted them

The moon phases for Remus, Suns for james, constellations for Sirius and regulus, stars for Marlene, flowers for lily, and hearts for Mary (her name means beloved), roses for evan, snakes for barty, jewels for Dorcas, Ravens for Benji, and crystals n spirals for pandora

He also paints Evan's nails

He's always tapping little patterns on everything and sometimes he's friends will notice and try to tap the same pattern (it normally takes them a while to figure it out)

Fidgets a lot

Everyone thinks that Peter and Sirius are not as good as friends are they are w the rest of the marauders but in reality, Sirius and Peter will js playfully insult each other (nothing that will actually hurt but there are a lot of death threats<3) and laugh abt it later

"Oi, Pete, you look a lot like a rat!" "I will tear you limb from limb siri" "the feeling is mutual"

He would also love vines as a type of room decor

Okie that's all who should I do next??? Pandora or lily?? Or sm1 else???

[my-autism-adhd-blog]

Im asexual and trans and possibly aromantic, And im autistic as well, is it bad that i dont like having studies come out saying my queerness is likely because of my autism? Like im proud of being autistic, and im proud of my queerness, but it feels off for me to say one is caused by the other, i just am the way i am. Maybe im misunderstanding what these studies mean? (Also, i dont have a problem with people saying they themselves are one way due to autism, i know that can be comforting for some people)

I tend to get bad vibes when its an unknown source telling this information because it sometimes reminds me of people using ableism to try and tell me im "confused" but I'd love to hear more perspective cuz it doesnt seem to bother anyone else and it very well could just be me not understanding.

Hi there,

I’m sorry to hear that this makes you uncomfortable. I did some research myself, and it does seem like autistic individuals are more likely to be LGBTQ+. Here’s a visual from Neurodivergent Insights, I site I find reliable:

According to Neurodivergent Insights:

Autists are more likely to be non-heterosexual than the general population (Sarris, 2020). While 4.5% of general population identifies as LGB (Gallup poll), a rate of 15-35% within Autistic community identify as LGB (Sarris, 2020).

Autists are 2-3 times more likely to be LGB than the general population (Dr. Eileen Crehan quoted in Sarris 2020).

In a study involving approximately 630 individuals, 69.7% of Autistic individuals reported being non-heterosexual while only 30% of the TD group identified as being non-heterosexual (George and Stokes, 2018).

Several studies suggest Autistic men are more likely to be heterosexual than Autistic women (Dewinter et al., 2017; George and Stokes, 2018). For example, in a Dutch study, 57 percent of autistic women reported being straight while 82 percent of autistic men reported being straight (Dewinter et al., 2017).

Gender Diversity

A larger percentage of autists identify with something other than strictly male or female (bigender, genderqueer and “other”) (George and Stokes, 2018)

Warrier et al., 2021 found that transgender and gender-diverse adults were three to six times more likely to be autistic than cisgender adults. Notably, this only includes diagnosed Autists–and many adults on the spectrum may be undiagnosed. Based on the global population, Warrier et al.2021 estimate somewhere between 3-9% of transgender and gender-diverse adults may be autistic. To learn more specifically about GenderDiversity and Autism see my infographic about it here.

Non-Traditional Relationship Structure

Emerging research suggests Autists are less likely to engage in traditional relationship structures. They are more likely to be poly, practice consensual non-monogamy and kink (Gratton, 2019; Schöttle et. al., 2017).

ACE/ARO

Autists are more likely to be asexual and/or aromantic (Attanasio et al., 2021; George and Stokes, 2018)

In a studying involving 230 Autistic adults 30% indicated they experienced sexual experiences as unpleasant (Lai et al., 2011)

In a study by Dewinter et al., 2017 Autistic women were more likely to be asexual than autistic men

The article has the links to the sources of these studies if you want to read more:

It’s not bad that you don’t like studies like this. I can see where you’re coming from. I just wanted to share some information about it so there would be some more understanding about the studies.

I’m no doctor or professional, so I can’t say if autism is common with the LGBTG+ community. But there does seem to be some connection between the two in my opinion.

I hope this answers your question. Thank you for the inbox. I hope you have a wonderful day/night. ❤️

[ashleywool]

"I LOVED THAT SHOW"

I wore my How to Dance in Ohio hoodie to church today. It's Palm Sunday and we did our customary palm procession from Duffy Square into the building, which is nice and all except winter decided to come back and bite my skin off again...so that sweatshirt seemed like the best choice as warm enough for the weather + can fit under my choir robe + won't get swelteringly uncomfortable once we're inside at the service. It did the job. Truly the ultimate transition piece. Get yours today while supplies last.

At fellowship afterwards, someone from the congregation that I didn't know--she's only in NYC part of the year--pointed out my sweatshirt and said "I LOVED THAT SHOW!"

It took her a moment to recognize me (she initially confused me for Madison, which, yeah that happens, I'll never be mad about it), and we had a lovely chat about the show. And what I noticed after walking away was...the subject of autism, or me being autistic, didn't come up at all.

I love and cherish the advocacy aspect of my work on HTDIO. I love and cherish the opportunity it gave me to be the autistic representation I wished I'd had growing up. But I have to say, it was SO nice to have someone, a total stranger, talking about the show and loving the show independent of The Autism Part.

It was wonderful being part of discussions about diverse representation, and I will never turn down opportunities to eagerly participate in those conversations. But I really wanted us to stick around long enough that the "novelty" aspect of "autistic characters played by autistic actors" (or even "canonically nonbinary/genderqueer characters") would wear off sufficiently for more people, so they could focus on the story and the characters and the music and all the other things that make our show great irrespective of the Representation aspect.

I've had a ROUGH few weeks, y'all. Truthfully, I've been going through one of the worst depressive episodes of my life. Aside from the obvious grief factor and logistical stressors, it turns out that post-operative depression is absolutely a thing. While I'd like to think I'm cognitively and emotionally mature enough to handle this level of change, especially considering how lucky I am to have robust support systems in family, friends, and healthcare practitioners, my very autistic nervous system has had a difficult time letting the sympathetic part cooperate with the parasympathetic part. So I've been a ball of tension, exhaustion, and worst of all, that soul-sucking apathy where nothing seems enjoyable or interesting, but maybe it would be if I had the energy to be interested.

It's helped to find a great physical therapy clinic that is giving me comprehensive, multi-pronged care and NOT charging me copays (because apparently my insurance pays them excellently--thank you, Equity-League and Cigna). It's helped that I got back in touch with a therapist I had seen years ago on BetterHelp (she's since left the platform and honestly, GOOD FOR HER). It's helped that I have parents with the means to help me out financially--and, crucially, the means to keep me accountable without resorting to pressure and guilt-tripping. It's helped to still live in a city where financial assistance isn't excruciatingly hard to come by if all else fails (at least compared to other states). It's helped to have agents submitting me for tons of exciting projects, and having several cabarets and readings to look forward to in this time of transition. It's helped to have a really chill, supportive church community keeping me spiritually grounded without buying into the yt American evangelical toxicity. It's helped to have my cats.

But sometimes, what makes me the happiest of all, is hearing "I LOVED THAT SHOW!"

I'll never not be proud to be known for How to Dance in Ohio and everything we stood for. I'm proud that the love was real, and the quality of the material reflected and reverberated that love. I'm proud of the representation aspect, and I'm proud that it wasn't just about that. And people who saw it, saw all of that.

It's so comforting to know that we shared this show with enough people that it's going to continue to matter.

People aren't going to forget.

I love that for us.

By the way, it was too cold to really show it off, but this is the shirt I wore underneath the sweatshirt. :)

[valarioncy]

Ko-Fi, Commisions, and Debt! Oh My!

Hello Hollowers and non-Hollowers. I @ahyesthesufferingoftvteens (Cursi) am collaborating with Valarioncy on this post to deliver a message to those still following the both of us, and to those that may follow us in the future!.

We currently have a joint Ko-Fi Account and are accepting donations and commisions! access to our Ko-Fi is down below all the long-winded explanation! But first...

Who are you guys?

Cy - Heeeeeey, it's ya boi Cy. This here is my Tumblr account. I'm an artist and writer, autistic, asexual, and plural. I have interest in all kinds of media, animation in particular. Writing is my main passion in terms of what I like to do creatively, but I'm not very capable of doing writing commissions. Art commissions though, I'm able to do! Provided it doesn't involve designing; I'm not able to do that at this time, although I would like to in future. :0 (Seriously, go to Cursi for anything involving design!) I've been primarily doing artwork for the Hollow, which can be found on my Instagram, although I haven't been active there for a while. I also specialize in OCs and SFW furry art, plus animals of many kinds. My art style is very graphic-novel-esque, with a predominantly Canadian influence. (No, I am not nor have I ever been Canadian, I don't know how this happened.) Feel free to commission me; I'll specify exactly what I'm doing in one of the fine sections below! ^_^

Cursi - I'm the Cursed Hollower you all know and love! I'm ok with any pronouns and my gender is whatever pisses you off the most (Genderqueer)! While I'm not as much of an artist as Cy, I pride myself in my creative writing and character development/design! If you want to know how my writing is, I'd suggest looking into my latest fanfiction: Come Sweet Death, in The Hollow (Cartoon) Category on A03...don't look at anything else, it's severely outdated and absolute trash.

So what's the news, Cy and Co?

Me, Cursi, and Valarioncy are two creatives/artists that primarily create content for The Hollow, as most of you may know.

We also like to make original projects. I'm trying to whip up an original series based off of my The Hollow Magical Girl AU, and Cy has mutliple different projects. One particular series we're working on: Green's Academy, is being worked on by both of us plus a third party.

Unfortunetly, there's a problem that's been holding us back. At the current moment, me and Cy are couch-surfing and trying to look for jobs to sustain our needs and wants and, potentially, get ourselves our own abode! This is predictably difficult due to our neurodivergancies, but without the second problem we have, this isn't are main woes. We have food stamps, so we're not going hungry.

The other FAR BIGGER problem is that I, Cursi...am $1,600 in credit card debt, and I recently missed my payment this month because I have only ten bucks in my bank account to keep it alive.

How the heck did you gain so much debt?

Now you're probably wondering how on earth I GOT $1,600 dollars in credit card debt. To make a long story short:

I flew to Valarioncy's state to help them with their homelessness situation with a healthy sum of about 3,000 dollars.

One of the other friends we had with us turned out to be severely abusive and held us down from escaping such a horrible situation.

Now that that friend is gone, our other friend is in a group home, and me and Cy are slightly more stabilized, the damage left behind is severe...especially on my poor credit card that had to extend our unwanted motel stays.

Needless to say I'm an absolute mess over this. I don't like being in debt, at all. Cy is trying to calm me down but I'm clinging onto my sanity for dear life.

But yeah, because of this debt that affects both of us, considering we're basically family at this point, we need cash. And because it's hard to get a job, we aren't getting an influx of cash...you can probably see where this is going now.

I like your creative works! How can I help?

Well you're just in luck, buddy-o. Me and Cy have created a joint Ko-Fi Account! We're accepting commissions AND donations! Ain't that just great!

Hey Cy! Tell us about your commision prices! --------------------

Cy: Right now, I'm pretty much up to doing digital flat-colored/minimal shading busts and full-bodies with transparent backgrounds. I get busts done a whole lot faster than full-bodies but I'm capable of doing full-bodies so I'm gonna include them! Pretty much all I need is a good reference for the character. I can do human, animal, and furry, SFW only.

-------------------- Thank you Cy! Go ahead and personally DM Cy for a commision if you're interested!

As for me, I'm open to ghost-writing and lore-development for the small small price of...um...$3? maybe $5? I know Cy will get on me for potentially underselling myself but they do that to themselves. Hehe. (PLEASE PAY THEM MORE THAN 3 to 5 BUCKS!!!!!!! -Cy)

We're also accepting donations. Any amount would be of great help! Even just $1 will make our day, seriously. $1 is more than we normally get nowadays!

Of course, if you can't donate, that's totally fine! Please spread the word and reblog this post and the many posts me and Cy make! You can pay us with some good classic feedback-dopamine!

One Last Link to our Ko-Fi!

Thank you for listening! Thanks for the support!

[sirpseudonymphoapish]

HEY TUMBLR. I FORGOT YOU EXISTED. IM STILL AUTISTIC. WANNA HEAR MY RECENT FIXATION????

Its about emoji OCs.

Okay so long story short a while back i somehow discovered that i had a crush on the nerd emoji (not exaggerating) and this started a chain of events that let to where I currently am now; my digital universe where the main inhabitants are emoji people. I fixate most heavily on my one OC, Calc, who is,, a nerd emoji.

This is Calc (left) and his younger sister Gram (right)

QUICK INFODUMP.

Calc and Gram are both queer autistic adults in their mid to late twenties. They get along very well,,, with each other. Not so much with their parents. (Parents are ""old fashioned"" so to speak. Cough cough. Homophobic.)

Calc is gay and genderqueer/fluid-ish, though mostly cis presenting. Gender wise, so is Gram. But Gram is AroAce.

Calc also has OCD and Gram has ADHD.

Calc works a very quiet office job as like an accountant receptionist idk something something for like an insurance company or whatever. and he LOVES IT. He loves having his own little office in a small quiet building where the only people he has to talk to are over the phone and all his coworkers are middle to old aged ladies.

Gram works at a bookstore which is a LOT MORE CHAOTIC than you'd think,, (its retail. No place is safe from the horrors of retail. Not even bookstores.) But it keeps her busy which she enjoys! For as frusterating as it can be she likes running around helping customers and organizing books and merchandise. She's never bored there.

Calc also has a boyfriend named Tune who's a cool emoji and MOST DEFINIETLY NOT A SELF INSERT,,,,,,,,,, I PROMISE,,,,,, (he looks exactly how i draw myself irl only yellow)

so HERES AN ART DUMP!!!!!!1!1!! i have more emoji ocs than this but i think this is a good intro post to them. Feel free to ask any questions you want

(The ref sheet is outdated and i plan on making a new one soon.)

AND HERES TWO RENDERED DRAWINGS,,, THAT I WAS GANNA POST SEPARATELY BUT,, O WELL

Gay? Ppssh. Im not gay. What gave you THAT idea,,,,,

Anyways have fun

[deconstructthesoup]

Aside from the campaign I'm DMing, I'm in two others (one is my first ever, done with my old friends, and one is a college-friend group), and I'm realizing that... so far, I have yet to make a D&D PC who is cis.

Like

My first character, a goblin bard named Morrigan Ursula Darcy, used she/they pronouns right from the get-go, and the more I played her and thought about her backstory---raised in a community where she was expected to be a brutal fighter, left home and got taken in by an archfey warlock, reinvented herself as a glamorous stage diva---the more I realized that it would make perfect sense if she was transfemme, so I made that canon.

And now I'm playing an autistic, non-binary drow artificer named Venus Faust who named themselves after one of the most multifaceted and powerful deities of legend---not to mention, the literal morning star. And they're goth.

I'm still kinda surprised that it took me so long to realize that I'm genderqueer, honestly.

[silicone-style-selfship]

The release of totk got me back into playing botw and hm. I wanna go on adventures with him,, nonbinary4nonbinary. autism4autism,,

Random s/i info and selfship headcanons under the cut :33

- Star owns a massive stable on the outskirts of Hateno Village, where she fosters and trains horses (because in my recent botw play through I sorta went on a horse collection rampage) where she meets Link after he moves in across town from her and they bond over exploration and horsies until they eventually get together and start travelling together.

- link is a nonverbal autistic and uses hylian sign language alongside hand signs he made to communicate easier in battle and travelling with zelda and now star. star is very verbal and does most of the talking for them both

- link is genderqueer and star is nonbinary but it isn’t until a few years after ganon is defeated that link starts experimenting with his presentation.

- link is still very much into sidon, crushing hard but on the flipside star has a massive crush on teake, the captain of the gerudo royal guard (girliepop can kill meeee). they do bond over this.

- both are a little touch starved so if you catch them in a quiet moment they're probably wrapped around each other

- star mostly fosters horses but the two they actually own are peachi, a white and peach mare who star mainly uses for short distance/non dangerous travel or just a companion and shadow, a black and white stallion who is the one they use on journeys because of his stamina and strength. eventually star helps link tame a brown mare who he calls sheik :]

- yes link is a short king, yes his datemate is slightly shorter than him, it's called a w.

- they hold hands when they sleep

(gwahhh one last thing)

there's a part of me that really wants to make it like. A reincarnation/soulmate thing cause 1. I like drawing s/is and 2. twilight!link is really really cool 3. I've already,, came up with a design,, for my oot s/i

[dee-in-the-box]

so. might've created some more dsaf ocs.

sorta kinda revamped my boy Morgan, and gave him a partner.

so, brief run down on the two of them before and after death:

Morgan Bane (pre-death):

he/they

transmasc nonbinary dude

around 5'4"-5'6"

Anxiety Personified™

he's just queer in general. they don't know what their exact sexuality is.

also autistic.

worked as Fredbear's night guard after Jack...y'know.

started dating Casey while they were working together.

called Casey his "Lil Honeybun."

he just needs a hug so fucking bad.

Henry kinda scared them, so they'd generally ask Casey to go talk to him for them. eventually, Henry got sick of Morgan not speaking to him directly and pretty much would just send Casey back with the message of "if he has something to say to me, tell him to come say it to my face himself." despite Morgan saying that it was fine and that he could handle it, Casey would still go with him and would just glare at Henry through the doorway.

has...slight (major) dependency issues with Casey. is generally viewed as being "clingy" towards it.

worked at Fredbear's from 1974-1977.

Casey Atkins (pre-death):

she/it

genderqueer gal

5'9"-5'10"

also autistic.

she's pretty quiet, and doesn't talk much. except with Morgan.

calls Morgan "Scaredy Cat." in a lighthearted way.

worked at Fredbear's as a technician. also after Jack...y'know.

doesn't like Henry. like. At All.

worked at Fredbear's from late 1973-1977.

"Phone Guy"/Morgan (post-death):

died due to a Springlock Failure in October of 1977.

woke up in The Factory, half programmed, and immediately panicked and asked where Casey was. they also started saying some...concerning things. such as "P-Please tell me I saved her, tell me she isn't dead, I-I can't live with myself if she's dead-" and "Casey? Casey, please, where are you?! I-Is it here?! Casey, Honeybun, where are you-?!"

almost no one was able to get close enough to touch him to get him to calm down, or to shut him down to finish reprogramming him, so they decided to leave him be until he'd calm down.

uh...long story short, he never did.

given that they were pretty sure that he could not be trusted to work alone (he was almost constantly begging to know where Casey was, seemed to be trying to escape The Factory at any opportunity to go look for her), they just decide to send him to random Fazbender locations to be a "co-manager" of sorts, and basically make him the other Phone Guys' problem.

they seem to be interested in talking to this weird shadowy rabbit that lingers in the restaurants...and they call it "Casey," too...weird, huh?

(Henry got both Morgan and Casey springlocked on the same day; Morgan in Fredbear and Casey in Springbonnie. after being springlocked, Morgan tried to crawl over to Casey in a desperate attempt to save her and get her out of the suit. Henry, however, started to drag Morgan away from it as they started to black out from pain and blood loss. they died not too long afterwards. Henry's exact reason for wanting the two of them dead isn't clear, but maybe it was another situation similar to Steven's where he didn't necessarily need a reason; he just could and he did.)

"The Hare"/Casey (post-death):

died due to a Springlock Failure in October of 1977.

appears as a shadowy version of Bonnie, with glowing eyes, tears, and teeth (basically Shadow Bonnie).

seems aggressive to just about everyone, but will especially act aggressive towards Dave (and Jack, if he's doing an Evil Route).

hangs around Morgan a lot of the time, like it's watching over them.

speaks Very cryptically.

hangs over Morgan's shoulder when he talks to others.

will suddenly, randomly glitch and scream out in agony, as though she's feeling the pain of being springlocked all over again.

(got springlocked by Henry alongside Morgan. she managed to keep herself alive through sheer willpower for about two hours before she finally died. it took the form of Bonnie as a sort constant, taunting reminder to Henry of what he'd done to it and Morgan. she haunted him for years, up until Henry got dragged to the Void, at which point she left to go find Morgan.)

(nobody knows what became of Casey's corpse, as no one at The Factory had mentioned its body being shipped there, and no one knew who Casey was when Morgan begged for them to find it.)

might draw them later. They <3

[fleamontsoleil]

Hello people!

My name's Kordian.

I'm a guy who fell in love with stories at a young age, and decided to make their life about them.

I’m a genderqueer, bisexual mess born on april 15th, which makes me:

an aries

using they/he pronouns,

coming from poland, 

speak polish, english and basic german, spanish, french and danish, which means i can wish you a happy birthday and order coffee, and also talk about the weather and describe my outfit, but i will not get into the depths of quantum physics. 

i’m also autistic.

more info lower!

Other random things about me:

i love writing

lemons, ginger, cinnamon, pears, pasta

i have a sweet tooth

i’m getting back into drawing and watercolour painting

i love flowers, my favourite one being a carnation

i’m basically 24/7 in headphones, music always on

i like learning new languages (if you haven’t figured that out yet)

i enjoy reading, watching movies and tv shows

i can play on ukulele and i’m getting better at guitar and bass

i love stickers and pins

kinda obsessed with angels and religious symbolism while being an atheist, idk how i did that

i can trauma dump without realising, sorry for that

i love sticking things to my walls

and also telling stories

travelling

coffee

chocolate

green

robin williams

On this blog, I reblog/post things related to writing and relatable things I see. Sometimes share a snippet of my writing or freak about an idea I'm having. I’m thinking about separating this side blog into two, one for fanfic (this one), and one for my original work (with my pen name) but idk. Maybe when I have more time.

What do I write?

I write mostly fiction and fantasy, usually gory.

I write things that are inspired by things I know. I have a great imagination, which sometimes is not so fun, but when I write it's really useful. I can sit in any place and make it into a story.

All my works include queer representation.

Some of my works might be graphic, but I will put trigger warnings before any of them.

My current works:

If it comes to longer WIPs, I am used to working on one/two at once, but giving it my whole attention for the time of writing. Even though I can read seven books at once, I can't write them at once.

I also write a lot of short stories, but I will not be listing them here.

"The Tangled Sun" (working title) - a fantasy novel (1st dratf) tag: wip : tts queer, pirates, magic

Fanfiction:

"Darksun" (working title) - a post apocalyptic novel(1st draft) tag: wip : darksun angels, queer, gore, horror

you can find me under cowboymorpheus on ao3

All of Us, Strangers - an AOUS deancas AU 24,095 words “How do you cope?” he asks. “With what?” “Listen?” he says, almost asks, and sticks the hand with the bottle up, one finger pointing at the ceiling. Dean doesn’t hear anything. The silence fills the entire space. “It’s so quiet,” he says, and his voice is slightly broken up, as if he’s mourning the sound that isn’t present. “The city’s out there, but we can’t hear a fucking thing.” Castiel leans even closer, as if he was about to tell Dean his deepest, darkest secret, and Dean backs away. His hand tightens on the doorknob. “I play music, but it’s worse when it ends. I even bought one of those white-noise machines. It’s like someone’s in the corner of the room, whispering about me. We can’t even open the windows, but I guess they don’t want us to jump.” he pauses for a while. “Bad for business. Broken bodies on the concrete. Who’s gonna move in then?” he asks, but he doesn’t expect an answer.

Dean Cas Big Bang fic - estimated word count 27k

-----

on the road - WHICH IS A WORKING TITLE - estimated word count is 60k After John dies, Dean has no more reasons to be trapped in his hometown. With the encouragement of his friends and family, he hits the road, where he meets new people and learns new things about himself, finally being able to explore himself as much as he always wanted to. Not having to hide, being able to just be his own person is something he didn't know he would ever be able to do. Little does he know, it's only the beginning of the good things to happen.

stained white roses - a darkfic basically

My other account is @cowboymorpheus. you'll probably find out some more on the intro post there. It's where I reblog and sometimes post fandom stuff, here it's just, I don't know. Writing, ao3 and the rest of random stuff like that.

That's pretty much all. Like I said, I'm open to new conversations, so don't hesitate to message me or send asks anytime. And I'm ask/tag game friendly!

Have a nice one!

[domesticated-whores]

hello, I've decided to do a thing that no one asked for, solely for myself. and that is heavily over-analyzing random bullshit about myself. starting with

over-analyzing the fuck out of my gender

get ready for so much useless information about the inner-workings of how I identify... longish post.

I think a lot (if not most) nonbinary/genderqueer people have a simplified gender that they publicly identify as and a different, more complex gender that they identify as internally or in queer-specific spaces.

I'm pretty open in general about being genderqueer. I don't really identify as nonbinary, it isn't my preferred term for what I am, but since I understand that it's a more common term that most people outside of queer spaces know at least at a surface level I'll use it sometimes. I don't usually get any deeper than that. I'll tolerate she/her pronouns (I'm afab and generally feminine, and I'm incredibly aware of that), if asked for my pronouns (rare, I'm very feminine presenting) then I'll say "I'm cool with anything, slight preference on they/them" because that's a lie, but it's simple and I don't care quite enough to fight anyone on it. I was out as he/him transmasc for a little while before it got to be not worth it to explain presentation =/= gender or trying to look uncomfortably masc in order to be taken seriously, so there are still people that use he/him pronouns for me irl which is nice, but I don't get *enough* dysphoria from being misgendered to try to get others to use them.

But I do have some specific shit for my gender, also. I've been studying the hell out of this shit for maybe 10 years. I'm autistic as fuck, I like researching and labeling and categorizing things, so I put a lot of thought and reflection into my gender and I really have no place to share it because no one really cares to have me deep-dive into the details for them.

First and foremost, I'm cassgender. In case you don't know what that is, it's when someone feels indifferent to their gender or generally feels it's unimportant. Different from something like agender because cassgender people still can *have* other gender identities, it isn't lack of gender identity, it's just that there isn't a super strong connection to it.

To me, I don't care if I'm misgendered really at all. I do have a preference on how I'm referred to, I do have a gender, but I also don't really think it matters in the grand scheme of things. If it's more convenient to me, I have zero issues pretending to be a cis woman. Am I? No. But I don't think much would really be different if I was, so I don't see why it really matters. I personally use almost all "gendered" words in a gender-neutral way (unless someone tells me they're uncomfy with it, where I still see the words themselves as gn but respect people enough not to use it for them), I understand gendered connotations but genuinely fail to see how they matter. Again, full respect that they matter to most people, but I personally don't see it so I won't act like I do.

Even when I did care more about my gender identity and being out publicly, it wasn't because of strong attachment to my gender. It was more of a sense of "I researched for so many hours finding the right labels, I'm going to use them openly dammit!!"

I'm also a transmasc femboy. I use he/him pronouns for myself and generally prefer those (though, again, I'm cool with any), but I'll use almost any gendered terms for myself interchangeably/by situation. For example, I tend to prefer feminine familial terms (I'm my cats' momma, I'd be an aunt if my brother had kids in the future, etc.) while I usually opt for more masculine basic terms (man rather than woman, masc pronouns, boyfriend if I'm in a relationship, etc.) and alternating on terms of endearment or authority (god/goddess, sir/ma'am, daddy/mommy, prince/princess, king/queen, etc.). If it's in lighthearted/meme terms, anything flies (girlie, "I'm just a girl," feminine urge, "girls don't want men, they want--" etc. isn't misgendering because it's silly and fun).

I'm afab, feminine as hell, and not really looking to transition medically at all, so I don't at all mind feminine shit because, uh, obviously. I wear dresses and eyeliner sometimes and have long hair and a petite, slight hourglass body and all that shit. My regular outfit is leggings and a crop top, it's a very titties out look tbh. I don't bind (use to, might start experimenting with it again when it gets colder but I can't with the tops I like for warm weather and I don't like using tape) or anything. If I could magically look more physically androgynous in the ways that I want, that'd be sick as hell, but I can't so I don't mind my body that much. I was on t for maybe 3-4 months and I got some minimal bottom growth and slight voice changing, but I was getting too many changes that I didn't really fuck with for my preferred brand of androgyny and a lot of things I wanted t didn't help, so I stopped. Like, if I could get free and easy top surgery or a reduction and somehow grow 4-6 inches in height that would be splendid, but one of those is too expensive to justify how mild my discomfort is and the other is literally impossible so I can live with what I have.

I also really think drag would be cool as hell for gender reasons, but unfortunately I'm something of a broke bitch and even being thrifty with it is out of my budget at the moment. Which is fine, I keep it on a back burner in case I have money to invest into a new thing that I might get burnt out on before it's even worth what I spent. I'm just not touching that when I'm struggling to do anything beyond pay rent and feed my cats. But it's certainly a gender thing that I put a lot of thought into.

I don't know. Again, I'm cassgender so I don't really care heavily about any of this, I'm just an overthinker so I know it because of that. It was just information sitting in my brain that I didn't know what to do with, so I'm dumping it here. I mostly want to deep-dive into my sexuality and romantic orientation, I just had to post this first because it is really connected to gender things. I have an essay-worth to say on my sexuality because I actually care a lot about that shit and I'm just at the end (I believe?) of still figuring it out, while I was pretty sure on my gender for a while and just had to settle on accurate labels for it mostly.