#the two most adorable gingers

[a-swiss-and-a-spaniard]

(x)

[wolken-himmel]

In which (Y/n) meets Leona's family at NRC Parents' Day. However, it's not his parents that come to visit him but instead his older brother and his family.

Request by anon.

"Uncle Leona! Uncle Leona!"

The Savanaclaw common room was quiet except for the constant yelling of an all too familiar small boy. An unruly ginger mop of hair seemed to dart around the area. That was until the boy came to a halt in front of the grumpy dorm leader. His youthful eyes sparkled when he gazed into his uncle's eyes, even if they were jaded and indifferent.

Leona rubbed his temples in dismay. "Quit it, Cheka," he whispered and did his best to shove him away with as much care he could muster. His eyes darkened in annoyance, and he pushed the boy into the direction of his sister-in-law. "I'm not some tree you can climb..."

Falena and Nali smiled at the tenderness that the younger prince tried to handle their son with. The queen let out a little chuckle and beckoned the young boy to her. He begrudgingly stopped his attempts of climbing onto his uncle's lap. "Well, Cheka. If your uncle says no, then please respect his decision," she said and extended her arms to the energetic boy. "Come to me, honey."

Although a look of disappointment flashed across Cheka's face, he nonetheless obeyed his mother with flattened ears.

"Thank you..." Leona breathed out gratefully.

"So," Falena began slowly, "how is school life treating you, brother?"

"Hmpf, the usual." No more came out of the dormleader's lips. Even when the air turned stagnant and awkward, he stubbornly kept his mouth shut. With his arms crossed in front of his chest, he tried to hide his clenched fists. In his head, he counted the seconds he would have to sit here and entertain his brother's family.

His counting was interrupted by a firm knock against the door to the common room. Without waiting for a reply, the door was pushed open gently. A small slit of light allowed your head to peek out from behind the door. "Hello, I hope I'm not interrupting—" you exclaimed in a friendly yet hasty tone. "I'm just here to check on you, see if everything's alright. You know, Ace and his brother started a fist-fight earlier..."

Without even realising, Leona's eyes lit up when they recognised your face. "Herbivore," he said smugly and waved you inside. Perhaps this was his ticket to surviving his family's visit successfully. The indifferent expression on his face was no more, and his gesturing somehow had the most energy he had summoned today. "Come in. Quickly."

You tilted your head in confusion, but upon noticing how pressing his gaze was, you hummed in defeat. "Sure..." With the door falling into its hinges behind you, you approached the empty chair next to the Savanaclaw dormleader. Your hands loosely resting on the backrest of the seat, you shot the two unfamiliar adults a smile. "Hello, I'm (Y/n), prefect of the Ramshackle dorm. It's nice to meet you."

Before you could make an attempt of sitting down, a small boy came bounding towards you. "(Y/n)! (Y/n)!" he cried out and immediately wrapped his arms around your waist with utter excitement. "It's been so long since I've last seen you! I missed you."

Your smile widened upon recognising the little boy. "Oh, Cheka! Right, it's been ages since you visited NRC," you cooed and ruffled his hair affectionately. There were a few times when Leona had been visited by his nephew, much to his dismay. However with your help, babysitting Cheka had become much more tolerable. And you couldn't deny that you had a soft spot for his adorable nephew.

The queen eyed you up and down in curiosity, but her eyes bore no ill intent when your gazes finally met. "Cheka talks about you all the time, dear," she said, accompanied by an amused smile. Despite the warmth of her eyes, she exuded an aura of elegance that almost seemed intimidating to you.

Her eyes remained on you even after you had taken a seat next to the dormleader. "It's a pleasure looking after Cheka," you exclaimed and lifted said boy into your lap. A little giggle escaped his lips when you wrapped your arms around his stomach and began swaying him back and forth. "He's a little bundle of sunshine."

Leona rolled his eyes. "As if..."

"It's nice to finally meet you, (Y/n)," the king piped up in a friendly tone. "I'm Falena, Leona's older brother. This is my wife, Nali. And you already know Cheka."

"Can we take (Y/n) with us?" Cheka asked his parents and wrapped his short arms around your neck. "Please!"

"No way." At once, Leona had lifted Cheka off your lap and set him to the ground again. "You're not taking the herbivore with you," he grumbled under his breath.

"I sadly have to attend lessons here at Night Raven College, Cheka," you told the disappointed child. "But perhaps you can visit me sometimes, or I could visit you during the next school break?"

The royal couple sent each other a meaningful look that went unnoticed by the others. Falena then spoke up, "We would be delighted if Leona could bring you around for the next school break, (Y/n)."

"Maybe," Leona muttered. "I'll think about it."

Nali chuckled and propped her elbows onto the table between you. A mischievous glint appeared in her kind eyes. "So, (Y/n), you two seem like an unlikely pair of good friends," she asked smoothly. "How did you meet?"

Laughter spilt from your lips at her question, and you immediately turned to Leona in amusement. For the first time today, the beginnings of an amused smile became evident on his lips. After your chuckles were nothing more than echoes, you began, "Oh, I stepped on his tail when he was napping in the botanical garden. It was friendship at first sight." Your eyes shimmered with a nostalgic glint, but you never noticed the way Leona's ears twitched unreadably. "No, I'm just joking. I feared for my life when I realised I had awoken the mighty lion from his sleep."

"As you should," he huffed and grinned.

"But, we got along pretty fine afterwards! I had to do a large project with Jack, a fellow first-year in Savanaclaw, and thus stuck around the dorm for a few weeks." Your genuine smile turned devious when you playfully drawled, "People always told me to never poke a lion with a stick, but it was way too tempting with Leona. And what can I say? It was worth it."

The queen broke out into loud laughter at your remark. "Hah, you're fierce. I like you already."

"You're lucky I didn't bite your head off." Leona's grin turned haughty.

His expression drew soft chuckles from your lips. Your eyes softened again as they gazed into his. "Well, I am very grateful, Leona." Just as you were about to lose yourself in his emerald eyes, the vibration of your phone snapped you back to reality. A surprised gasp escaped your lips as you rose to your feet. "Oh, would you look at the time? I need to leave already to check up on the next student."

"Please don't leave—" Cheka cried out and clung to your leg like a lifeline. His grip was frighteningly strong for a boy his age.

Leona furrowed his eyebrows in dismay. "Yeah, don't leave," he echoed, although his voice sounded more commanding than his nephew's.

With a heavy heart, you pried the young boy off your leg and gently pushed him towards his parents. You sent him and his uncle an apologetic look. "I need to go, you two." With a solemn sigh escaping your lips, you turned to the royal couple. "It was nice meeting you, Falena and Nali! I hope to see you two around sometime. Goodbye."

They each muttered a goodbye of their own. With newfound haste, you exited the common room at the speed of light. The door slammed close behind you before the room was overtaken by silence again. The king and queen had smiles etched onto their faces as they stared off into the distance. The silence was no longer awkward, and Leona found it a little more bearable.

"You should keep that one," Nali suddenly said out of nowhere.

Leona almost choked on his spit. He immediately whipped his head towards his sister-in-law and looked at her with narrowed eyes. "With all due respect, but what do you mean?"

A chuckle escaped her lips. "I said what I said."

Her husband took her hand into his and gave it a firm squeeze. Once again, the two shared that meaningful look from earlier that the dormleader couldn't quite decipher.

Falena shot his younger brother a teasing smile. "A young love... Isn't it a beautiful thing?"

[salsflore]

sigh. i’m in love look away

[deathbysnakes]

Don't you think it would be adorable that pierro plays hide and seek with an adopted child (y/n) while the other harbingers are in shock watching this scene??

The last part should be hilarious hahhahaha

Hide & Seek Catastrophe

Pierro & child reader (Platonic)

Side note:Sorry this took so long, I've been kinda stressed lately.

Warnings:You almost get experimented on

Pronouns:He/Him (All male harbingers + Dottore's clones) She/Her (All female harbingers) You/Your (Reader)

Fluff/Crack

Explanation:You have recently been adopted by the leader of the fatui harbingers, Pierro, and you've convinced him to play hide and seek with you, but you made the not so smart decision to go to the fatui headquarters to hide (I like to imagine that the harbingers houses are connected to the fatui headquarters)

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"Close your eyes, and count to 60, no peaking!" You chirped happily, as you watched Pierro follow your instructions. "60? Why not 30?" Pierro mumbled to himself nervously, something about having you out of his sight in such a dangerous place made him anxious, but he ignored his feelings, he wanted you to be happy after all, you've been cooped up in Pierro's mansion ever sense you've been adopted, it feels wrong to deny your request when you've been wanting to stretch your legs and have some fun for the past few days.

You immediately dashed off as soon as Pierro started to count, not only was this your chance to play, it was your chance to explore. You opened the mansions door and it lead out into a huge palace. You couldn't help but stare in awe for a few seconds before dashing off into the palace.

You squealed in surprise as you saw a intimidating figure as soon as soon as you turned a corner, the figure was tall, muscular, and had long black hair, but perhaps the most intimidating thing about him was his helmet, you couldn't see his face because of it, and it rightfully disturbed you. The man turned and looked at you, nothing more, just stared. "What is a child doing in a place like this?" You tensed up, the feminine voice was like a soothing melody, but there was something off about it. You slowly turned around and came face to face with a angelic woman with black and pink hair, and a strange cross-shaped white cloth that was kinda covering her eyes. "Let's get you back to the house of hearth~" She sang, reaching out for you, you squealed in fear and made a run for it. The woman watched you run with a amused face, not attempting to make chase, she'd just tell Arlecchino.

You eventually slowed down and attempted to catch your breath with tears in your eyes, who knew this place could be so terrifying? Clearly not you. "Whoa, you okay there kid? You look like you've just seen a ghost." You quickly whip around and before you is standing a ginger haired man with a kind but worried smile on his face. "Calm down, I'm not going to hurt you." The man crouch's down to your leavel. "My names Tartaglia, yours is?" Tartaglia says, his head tilting to the side to try and seem less threatening. "[Name]..." You answer, tears still clouding your vision. "That's a nice name!" Just as you start to feel relaxed, you hear footsteps behind you. "Tartaglia, about how much money you spent when you were in Liyue..." The man with glasses stopped when he saw your small figure staring up at him with scared eyes. "What is this child doing here?" He asked in a stern tone, crossing his arms. "Uh...I'm not sure, I kinda just saw it." Tartaglia responded, putting a hand on the back of his head. "No matter, Tartaglia you spent 7 million mora when you went to Liyue, what is the meaning of this?!"

As the two argue you heard a voice "Psst! Hay! Over here!" You turned to see a red eyed and blue haired child that looked about 10 motioning to you to come over, you walk towards him hesitantly, being cautious not to catch the attention of the two arguing men. "Do you want to see something cool?" He asked, there was a curtain cunning look in his eyes that made you uneasy but you nodded hesitantly. "Then follow me!" The boy took off into a sprint, and you followed behind, he was surprisingly fast for a child his age. You froze as you arrived at a scary looking lab. "What's this, Alpha?" You gasp in surprise when you hear someone's voice behind you, you turn around and see a tall red eyed and blue haired man, the boy, that's apparently called Alpha, and the man looked related. "A new test subject!" You're eyes widened in terror as you heard those words. "How kind of you." The man walked over to Alpha and ruffled his hair, then turned back to you. He started to reach out towards you. "Now, let's be going now-" Before he could finish his sentence you felt yourself being picked up from under your arms and being dashed away.

You felt yourself being put down on a bench, and when you looked up you saw a short purple haired man looking down at you with a angry look on his face. "What were you thinking?! Weren't you ever taught not to go with strangers?!" You started to tear up at his harsh words and he let out a sigh and pinched the bridge of his nose. "If you ever see someone with red eyes and blue hair, don't go near them, don't engage with them, go the other way, you got it?" You nodded, and the man started to walk away.

You got up off of the bench and heard something crunch beneath you, you looked down and saw a little robot, then you heard a gasp. You turned around and saw a green haired woman looking down at the little robot you just crushed in shock, then her face quickly shifted into anger. "You little brat! Look what you've done to little Tom 5.8!" You teared up at the woman yelling, but she still didn't give up. "Do you know, how much blood and sweat I put into making him?! Of course you don't! You're a dumb little child! This is why I hate children, they ruin everything!" You broke into a full on break down, crying loudly as the woman continued shouting insults at you. "Sandrone that's enough!" Sandrone let out a "ow!" When she was hit in the shoulder with a cane. "You've done enough, leave the poor child alone! " Sandrone angerly stomps off while mumbling angerly.

You felt a gloved hand on your head as you continued crying, as you started to calm down and wipe the tears from your eyes, you see what looks like a friendly old man with an elf like appearance standing in front of you. "There, there little one, she's like this all the time, there's nothing to feel guilty about." You started to calm down at his soothing words. "Would you like a pastry?" He asked, reaching into a basket, you nodded as your tears started to stop. He pulled out a few macarons and you hesitantly took them from him. "Try to avoid Sandrone, she's always in a bad mood and takes it out on the poor soul that comes in a 10-foot radius of her." The old man said as you ate. "I'll be off now, keep yourself safe little one." The old man said as he started to walk away.

"Don't cry, it makes you look ugly." You turned around and saw a tall blond woman in a white and black dress in front of you. "Why are you staring at me like that? Fix your face." The woman said, crossing her arms. You started to tear up again and the woman's eyes widened. "What did I just tell you?" The woman leans down, takes a handkerchief out, and wipes the tears off of your face. "Don't. Cry." This strange way of trying to comfort you actually made you feel better. "You're only getting this treatment because you're cute." The woman huffed. "There you are." The both of you turn around, a woman with white and black hair is walking towards the two of you. "Come to me my child, it's time to go back to the house of hearth." The blond woman in the black and white dress gets up and steps back, letting the black and white haired woman approach you. You backed away anxiously as the woman got closer, and then another person came into your vision, a man with blue hair and a bird mask. "Hands off Arlecchino, this one wondered into my lab, there for it's my test subject now." Arlecchino gave the blue haired man a mean look. "You will not be taking one of my children." You noticed, behind her, the same black and pink haired woman was watching you, well, it looked like she was watching you, but her eyes were closed. "Both of you will not be taking my child."

You felt yourself being picked up, and when you turned around, it was Pierro. "Your child?" You turned to see the ginger guy with the same black haired guy with glasses. "You have a child?" Tartaglia asked again. You noticed familiar faces gathering around. "Sence when did you have a child?" The short purple haired man asked as he leaned against a piller. "One week ago, Scaramouche." Pierro answered and turned back to you. "And why do you have meringue on your lips?" You're eyes widened and you looked around, you've already had your daily sweet for today, you weren't supposed to have another, and you had mutable macaroons. "That would be my falt." The little old man spoke up. "I found your child crying so I gave [preferred pronouns] some of my pastries." Pierro frowned at this. "Why was my child crying?" The little old man looked over at Sandrone, and Pierro followed his gaze. "We'll have a little, chat about this later, but now, we're going back home, and let this be known, if my child has a single scratch on them, you all will be punished." Pierro started to walk away but you whined and tried to get out of his grasp. "What is it now?" Pierro asked with a sigh. "I want to play hide and seek again, but this time, I want to be the seeker!" It was silent for a moment before it was broken by a chuckle. "I don't see why not?" The little old man spoke. "I want to play hide and seek!" The little red eyed and blue haired boy called Alpha you saw earlier chimed in. Pierro sighed again. "Alright, but this time, you count for 30 seconds." Pierro said in a series tone, but there was also a hint of softness in it. "I want to play too." Everyone turned to see who was talking, it was the intimidating man with the helmet you saw earlier. "Really, you of all people?" The blue haired man with the bird mask spoke, giving the intimidating man a judgmental look. "Yes."

[thecapricunt1616]

Lily of the Valley - (c.b. oneshot)

O/S INSPO:  Lily of the Valley Soothing, calming, draws peace and tranquility, and repels negativity. Assists in empowering happiness and mental powers. Married couples should plant Lily of the Valley in their first garden to promote longevity of the marriage.  POSTED DATE:03/30/2024 W/C: 4,114

A/N: FINALLY!!!! I am so sorry this took forever! This O/S is based on this adorable request from the LOML @daysofyellowroses - please check out her blog! I hope this satisfies your Carmy Proposing idea! I'm sorry it took so long i've been sick, but were back baby!!! Requests are opennnn y'all! This is also heavily inspired by my amazing OOMF @gingergofastboatsmojito - In another timeline Carmy still somehow came across Madame Stardusts jewelry (she transcends time and space that woman!) , & Stella exists too! If you want to meet more of that character in the universe Ginger created (I highly recommend you do)you can read that AMAZING FIC HERE ! Please be sure to leave kudos & comments & give Ginger all the flowers she deserves!!!

WARNINGS FOR BTC: Smut, Swearing, NO USE OF Y/N - As little physical description as possible, fluffy Carmen, OC Carmy - (He's more emotionally grown obvi hahah)

➵ 𝐂𝐡𝐞𝐜𝐤 𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐦𝐲 𝐌𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐩𝐨𝐬𝐭 

You pushed the heavy, bulging tote bags full of groceries up your arm as you walked back to Your&Carmy’s shared Condo Building. The wildflower seeds you’d thrown on the little patches of grass on your walks to the train, along the sidewalk on your block had finally started to bloom. Adorable tiny little flowers in vibrant shades of blue, pink, purple, yellow, and white peeking out over the sidewalk's edge. 

Spring had most definitely sprung in Chicago by this point. Your commute whilst walking to work down Michigan Ave, passing the stunning array of tulips, had told you that fiercely every time you walked to and from the train this week on the way to work. It was finally Friday, and you couldn’t be happier. 

Carmen had been so busy this week- busier than normal. You’d usually just hang out with your best friends to fill that pathetic, lonely void while grading papers and doing your own assignments- but they were busy this week too! You were convinced the universe had bound you to loneliness this week, so naturally, all you wanted to do was get home, crawl into bed, and sleep- until Carmy came in around 2 to 3 am, and get that savored 15 minutes of cuddles after his shower, before exhaustion came over you again and you fell back asleep. 

You used your special key fob to get in the door of your condo’s shared building, which to your standards was very luxurious- it included amenities you’d never even thought of. You and Carmy had moved in together 3 months ago, it took a lot of convincing on your end. You and Carmy had lived on opposite ends of town, so every time you’d see eachother, (which was very often) -  it would be an hour's drive that he insisted- or, him losing the battle- and allowing you to take the train back all those stops. 

You weren’t particularly religious,  it was more just a personal preference - that you would be at least engaged before you were to move in together. Especially before having a mortgage together. You’d told Carmy this, and he’d given you the same answer each time over the last two years he’d been begging - “Baby we know we’re in love, you know we’re eachothers forever person - we tell eachother every day! We’ve been together 3 years, Let me take care of you” 

It wasn’t that you didn’t want to be taken care of- it’s just…you liked working. You loved your job, you’d went to school and earned a masters degree for Christ sake, and were currently working on your PHD. You couldn’t ever see yourself giving that up, and moving in with a boyfriend and him insisting on paying all the bills made you fear you’d fall pregnant, and then your professional life would be over. 

But, Carmen had insisted to you he wasn’t interested in children unless you were. You were sure at one point you never wanted them, but you were becoming more afraid, because seeing as amazing an uncle Carmen was, how naturally kind and understanding he was of children- it brought out something in you. It was so sudden that you could imagine turning your shared library / art studio into a nursery during slow time at work. 

You walked down the hall, in no rush to be home. The only presence waiting being your cat, Truffle, Carmy had insisted on the name due to his deep black fur. 

You approached the door, confused as to why you were hearing…music? From your apartment? You shook the hope of Carmy being home this early away, not wanting to be dissapointed. The neighbors downstairs must be blasting that same kind of jazz instrumental Carmy listens to so loud that you heard it through the floor. 

You unlock the door, and sure enough the music playing softly through the condo gets a tad louder but the first thing to catch your eye was the white and pink rose petals making a trail to the kitchen. You heard Carmy humming lightly, the sound of chopping on the cutting board. 

“Bear?” You quickly nudge the door shut with your hip, not even bothering to take your shoes off and rushing down the hall into the kitchen. Sitting atop the breakfast bar, was a vase packed with beautiful pink and white roses. 

He looks up from the cutting board “My favorite girl” he stops what he was doing immediately coming and taking the bags from your shoulders, setting them down before greeting you with a sweet kiss. He cupped your cheeks gently, pulling you in to him so you were flush together with his other hand.  

“You used our card f’that right?” He asked softly when he pulled away. You roll your eyes a bit, he had insisted you get a shared credit card, and that you purchase everything with it- and at the end of the month, he will show you the statement, and only pay a quarter of the total, just another one of the ways he assured every financial burden of yours was eased significantly. 

“Yes, what is all this baby?” You asked, motioning to the roses. “Did I forget somethin? Our anniversary isn’t for another 2 months” you asked a bit nervously. Carmen wasn’t a stickler for dates, but it would break your heart if you were to forget something important. 

“No- no. I just…just love you- I wanted to show you, and especially after this week I know I’ve been crazy busy, and I’ve been comin’ in late and leavin’ early, and…I just wanted to show my best girl how much she means t’me” he kissed your forehead sweetly and you felt a blush creeping to your cheeks. 

“That’s so sweet Bear. Thank you I love you, this is…no one’s ever done this- oh my god- are those balloons?” You giggled, seeing heart shaped foil balloons tied to your chair at the table and he smiled proudly. 

“Mmhmm, the lady at the flower place said that - we can talk about it later. You wanna cook w’me? You can just watch if you want?” He asked, gently brushing his fingers through your hair. 

“I never turn down a lesson from the best, let me go get changed real quick” you headed toward the bedroom and he stopped you by your hand pulling you back into his chest, kissing your neck with wet open mouth kisses earning a giggle that you couldn’t contain. 

“Mmm- don’t go in there right now, it’s for later. I already got your pajamas right here” he said going over to the couch and grabbing your favorite pair of sweatpants and his old ‘the beef’ tshirt that to you was the most comfortable thing in the world, especially when he wore it to bed for a few nights before giving it back. 

“For later huh?” You muse, taking off your heeled booties and unbuttoning your slacks before peeling them off and trading them for your soft fuzzy grey sweatpants. 

“Mmhmm” he hummed in response and took your pants for you and your blouse and bra as well, bringing them to the laundry room as you put the shirt on and got your hair situated into a bun. 

“What are we cooking today, chef?” You asked, heading over to the kitchen to see there were little bowls of vegetables that have been precut and you gasp happily. “Stop- are we really?” You giggled. 

“I told you that it’s easy baby but you hate eggplant so ratatouille isn’t gonna be something you’re a big fan of” he chuckled. You had watched the movie with him, and told him that the ratatouille dish looked insanely delicious and that you wanted him to make it for you, but he told you your aversion to eggplant would probably turn you off the dish. 

“But there isn’t eggplant” you said looking over the dishes filled with various vegetables. 

“That’s right, this is princess ratatouille. I’ve been figurin’ out different vegetables w’Syd that would work for it, we finally got it right. We have zucchini and a few different squashes, and we have onion and garlic, tomato, bell pepper, everything you like. I think you’ll love it baby.” He said rubbing your back gently. 

“Of course I’m gonna love it bear, I love everything we make together you have the magic touch. So what’s my job?” You asked eagerly. 

“You my special sous chef, are gonna help put the veggies in and I’m gonna do the sauce” He kissed your temple gently. 

“Ok! Let me get my apron” You said, happily turning to the drawer you kept your aprons in.

“Wait-” he said, holding your arm. You look back at him and he looked…nervous.”Is…something wrong?” You questioned, brows furrowed slightly in concern.

“No- no I um….i got you a new one” he said sheepishly, walking over to the island and opening up the cupboard beneath you never used. 

“Oh- ok..Leveling up are we?” You joked, happily leaning against the counter. 

“Jesus-” he chuckled, “Close y’r fuckin eyes- carnival psychic” he teases and you laughed, obliging and closing your eyes.

“Carnival psychic?” you asked and he came over gently putting bundle of fabric in your awaiting hands.

“I swear t’god- you went snoopin’? Open your eyes” he said. You opened your eyes, looking into your hands and seeing an apron. It was white, just like his, and folded perfectly. In thick black letters, intricately painted, ‘ Will You Marry Me? ‘ Adorned with a little red heart over the center pocket that had a square shaped bump.

You felt all of the blood leave your face, your knees feeling wobbly, your mouth gaping in to an O shape, as you stare down at the apron. “Where did you get this?” you whispered, completely awestruck. 

“I-I…um…made it?” he rubbed the back of his neck nervously. “I- shit. Fuck- is this not how you pictured it? I’m so fuckin sorry babe- I-I thought…I dunno- like.. You wanted it private? Cause I know you said you’d never-” he’s interrupted by your lips crashing on his in a fervent wanting kiss, a mix of spit and teeth and lips and tongues, he moans softly into your mouth, squeezing your waist.

You were pressed together so firmly that the small box dug into your ribs, eventually pulling away from him with shaking hands and reaching into the pocket, pulling out the small black velvet box. You ever so carefully opened it, your breath catching in your throat when you saw the absolutely breathtaking ring.

“I-it’s not uh..not a diamond- cause I know you said-” you interrupt him

“Princesses and Queens don’t wear diamonds, they wear crystals” you finished, staring at the beautifully cut opal, at least 8 carats, banded by a intricate edwardian band… nothing short of a ring for a Goddess.

“But..But- this one…it does- it has both…because uh” he swallows thickly. “It…in my mind- when I s-saw it, it represented your soul, and your physical body.. And I liked that. Cause- y’re my diamond, but you’re also my queen, my everything, baby. Like how - how you said that…you wished your aura was opal? It is. It is, angel. And every time you look at that, I want you to remember that you’re beautiful from your diamond exterior, to your opal soul” he brushed his finger over the ring, before meeting your gaze once again.

He gently wiped the tears that were running down your cheeks freely, hot and wet and open. It was rare that Carmy genuinely used his words rather then his actions to express his love for you, so you were nothing short of savoring this. “Holy fucking shit” you laughed, shaking your head and looking down at the ring box. “Put it on my hand” you held your left hand out. 

He chuckled a bit, “so… yes? You will?” he asked carefully, pulling the ring out of the box.

“Are you kidding, YES! Put this ring on my finger and fuck me dumb- this is all i’ve ever wanted, Bear, I fucking love you- and youre asking if I want you to be my husband?! I’ve wanted nothing more for two years- at least!” you shake your left hand for emphasis, a wide large grin on your face.

He carefully slid the ring over your manicured finger, and it just made you cry more how it fit perfectly. “How do you know my size?!” you asked, since most of the vintage rings he'd bought you were adjustable so it didn't matter the size of the rings he’d gotten for you before.

He chuckled a bit, “so- y’re ring…y’know the one…y’thought you lost it at Chipotle like…ahhh- 8 months ago now? In the bathroom? Y’took it off at the table, you wore it on your ring finger so I had to take my chance. You kept sayin how it was like- the only ring you’d found that fit without takin’ it to the jewler. So uh” he dug in his jeans pocket, placing your beloved vintage ring with your starsign on it in your palm.

“I got that ring, based on the size. I got it uhhh…sorry dont be offended- it’s not new… I got it at an estate sale of this lady- it was crazy- the way I came across it babe… like fate. It was when Syd and I went to New York for that interview, she literally dragged me to this sale cause she said the lady who died was said to have a bunch of vintage fur and stuff she was looking f’somethin- anyway. We met the lady’s daughter- Stella? I think it was? Doesn’t matter… but she um..said her Ma was some crazy astrology nut, also said she only wore crystals. So I took a look… that was the first box I opened. And y’ring on my pinky, it fit perfect, so I tried it on- it fit like a glove. I’m glad we don't have to size it. Asked her if it was real, she said - her Ma told ‘er some…. Like life coach? Er- astrologer life coach author? Gave it to ‘er on a trip to Jamaica in the 60’s. Told ‘er ‘this ring will someday be worn on a hand proudly as a devotion of true love’- Miss- No! Madame ! Madame Stardust. Nutty name right?” he chuckled a bit. 

You smiled proudly at the ring, a devotion of true love indeed. “I think” you turned to the counter, stacking the bowls of vegetables together and putting them in the fridge as you friskily countered “you are not going in to work at all next week- wifes orders” you walked over to him, hips swaying. “And after you fuck me absolutely stupid” you grabbed his collar, pulling him in so your faces were meer inches apart “Oh- and we talk about how this mademe stardust? Confirms that our souls are indeed woven together like a fucking wicker basket” you kiss him roughly, weaving your fingers through his dirty blonde curls and tugging firmly. 

He moaned into your mouth, his hands trailing down and squeezing your ass firmly. You hummed in satisfaction, leaning against him and he stumbled back, back, back, pushing the bedroom door open with a squeak. You looked up, Breaking your kiss with wide eyes.

All throughout the bedroom, were printed photos of you and Carmy throughout the years, suspended with clear wire so it was as if the photos were floating midair. You clasp your hands over your mouth, admiring all the hard work and pure thought that had went into the gesture. You looked over all the photos, three years of memories hanging before you like a gallery of love surrounding you, all of your fondest happiest memories at every flicker of your eyes.

“Carmen” you whispered, walking forward and admiring each and every photograph…

He comes behind you, wrapping his arms around your waist and resting his chin on your shoulder. 

“Y’know how you said no work next week…” he said softly, kissing up your neck with wet, sexy, open mouthed kisses. “We leave Sunday… F’Cyprus” He said hotly in your ear, his breath tickling your neck causing a moan to escape your lips as he gently lifts your shirt, palming your breast gently.

“Is- is that-” you breathe out

“We’re getting a tour of Aphrodites Baths” he said softly, rolling your taught nipple between his thumb and forefinger.

“Ah- y-you remembered?” you gasped, he let out a soft deep chuckle, Kissing the corner of your mouth and gently laying you down upon the soft sheets of your shared bed. 

“I’d have proposed over a year ago- when I got the fuckin’ ring if i coulda gotten us the tour sooner” he muttered into your skin, tugging off your- (his) shirt, leaving supple, gentle kisses over your stomach and up your ribs.

“Mm- are we- can we swim?” I asked hopefully.

He  gently wipes your tears away, “No” he said a bit sadly, “We can dip our hands… some asshole ruined swimming for people years ago…before we met…but- we were also gonna Parga Greece, baby. We’re spending 2 days in Cyprus, then flying to Parga on a charter- we can swim, fuck, do whatever in those waters baby. Amidst the Goddess of the Underworld f’five whole days” he smirked and you gasped, as if he’d gotten you the moon on a string.

“The Acheron River?” you whisper and he nodded, gently rubbing his thumb over your lips.

“That is the sexiest thing i’ve ever heard in my life- you’re gonna make me cum in the 2nd most famous river of Hell?” you giggled and he snorts a laugh, pushing you on the bed gently.

“Fuck yeah, you little fuckin’ freak” he teased, tugging off your panties and sweatpants in one swift pull, leaving you soaked and bare before him.

You gasped at the rough action, quickly being soothed by soft, sweet kisses over your hipbones. 

“I fuckin smell y’kitten fuck” he growled, kissing the inner of your thigh in the way that made you creen. 

“Shit- good- right? If y’compared me to a seafood market i’d break your nose” you teased, hooking the crooks of your knees over his shoulders, shivering when he leaned in closer, his hot breath directly over your clit- his lapis blue eyes boring into yours.

“That question doesn’t deserve an answer” he grumbled hotly, spreading your folds with his fingers and admiring the wet, slick, mess in front of him. “S’fuckin pretty princess- fuckin’ prettiest pussy in the world” he nearly moaned, burrying his mouth where you needed him most, eyes fixed on yours.

You couldn’t even make a sound- a hot breathy gasp escaping your slack-jawed stance as your head flopped back on the mattress with a soft bounce. “Mmmmm shit” Carmy hummed, satisfied with your taste as if he was devouring his favorite dessert.

“F-Ffuuuckkk” you whimpered out pathetically, voice cracking and bleeding out between the fracture lines of your hot intense pleasure.

“Mmhmm-mmmhmmm” Carmy mumbled confidently against your now firm clit, tongue flicking over it at a mind-numbing pace, bringing you right to the edge and hanging you there by a single finger.

“Ahhhh-Ahhhh-Fuck!! Carmy! Oh- ohhhh!!!” You whined, spine pointing in an arch off the mattress, your hips and thighs quivering and shaking wildly as your orgasm crashed over you like hot lightning before you could even warn him, or know yourself it was so close.

“Goooood girl, thats it- mm- my good fuckin’ girl- Y’gonna be my fuckin’ wife baby? Mmm? Gonna be mine? F’rever?” He grumbled, placing a gentle kiss to your clit before placing gentle yet firm pressure over it with the pad of his tongue that made your hips buck with a mind of their own.

He chuckled slightly into your heat, the vibration causing you to whine pathetically. “Y-yes-yes-fuck i’mfuckinyoursBear-y’gonnamakemey’wife? Yeah? Gonna make me Mrs. fuckin Carmen Berzatto?” you slurred, pulling him into a messy wanting kiss, soughing at the flavor of your core coating his spit.

“Fuckin- spit in my fucking mouth- claim me” you groaned. He smiled against your lips, pulling away slightly, a thick hot string of saliva connecting the two of you.

“So fuckin dirty” he grumbled with a smirk “Open that filthy fucking mouth” he ordered, getting quiet for a moment as he gathered saliva in the front of his mouth.

You obeyed him immediately - your jaw going slack, tongue stuck out ever so slightly and eyes fluttered shut. Then- you felt it, hot, sweet, salty saliva coating your tongue, you groan at the flavor as it continues pooling over your tastebuds. “Do not fucking swallow yet- greedy girl” he tapped your chin firmly, before pulling your jaw open wider with Tthe pad of his thumb. 

“Stick out that pretty little tongue” he grumbled, you obeyed with a smile, opening wide as you could, sticking your tongue out far, showing off the creamy white saliva he’d dressed your tongue in, so much it was seeping down onto your chin, threatening to coat the front and back of your throat.

“Good girl- that's my good little kitten” he purred, “How d’you want me princess?” he gently collected the excess saliva from your chin on his thumb, sucking it off his digit hotly as he awaits your response while you swallow gratefully, the taste setting your soul ablaze.

“I want you to fucking claim me, Carmy, holy fuck- use me, worship me, fuck me like a goddamn animal- whatever you fucking want- please” you begged after you’d savored the taste while you swallowed, his sky blue eyes going dark as navy slacks with lust at the admission. 

“Yeah? Why not all three?” he pushed you down to the mattress by your throat, not hard enough to bruise- but hard enough for the breath to leave your lungs and your core to throb so hard you were clenching your thighs, trying to give any solace of pressure to your swollen aching clit.

“P-please” you stuttered, writhing against the mattress and he chuckled darkly. 

“Are we a little needy? Mmm princess?” he pushes your knees apart with his thigh, aiding the throbbing pressure with his strong fingers, rubbing firm, slow circles into the twitching bud that made your hips snap into the mattress and head fall back to the bed, eyes rolling back with a sharp gasp of pleasure. 

“Pl-please-” you gasp out, spine arching sharply as he replaced his fingers with his mouth on your clit, 2 fingers slipping inside of you with no resistance due to the fact your core was so soaked it was beginning to pool at the dip of your bum and soak the sheets. The squelching as he pumped into your g-spot mixed with your high-pitched moans and frisky growls was absolute sin.

He opens his jaw wider, tonguing your entrance wildly and nuzzling his strong nose against your clit in broad strokes, randomly flicking back and forth quickly making you squeal in pleasure as you grind against his mouth, fully out of control of your movements as if you were a puppet on a string.

“H-Hooooo-i’m cumming- oh- don’t you dare fucking stop Carmen” you growled, grabbing his curls and pullinghim further into your core. “I’m cumming- i’mcumming-holy-holyfuck-imfuuuckiing-AAAH!” your thighs and hips shake and quiver, stars of ethereal white filling your vision.

“Mmhmmm” he grumbled, coming up and sucking your nipple with his slick lips, his chin and nose soaked with your arousal, so much so his chin dripped onto your ribs. 

“H-Oh-yes Bear” you whined out, head tilting to meet his gaze. “I need you- I-I need you inside- like- fuck- when you- you have my knees around your hips and y-you fuckin’- just drill me Carmy- I need that- need you deep” You reverberated wantingly, wrapping your thighs around his waist taughtly, making it easier for him to take you exactly how you wanted.

“Jesus Christ- I can’t fuckin’ stand y’baby. Y’re like a fuckin’ drug- it’s like I fuckin’ function unless I’ve had a hit” he nibbed your collarbone, quickly removing his jeans and boxers, aligning himself with your entrance.

You gave him a mischievous smile, inching your hips forward. “C’mon- I don’t give a fuck ‘bout cooking right now- fuck me absolutely dumb- then take me to Sam’s f’r chocolate chip pancakes- sure that waitress will be over the moon bout my ring” you mused, capturing our lips together, as he scoops up your shoulders and holds you chest to chest, your third of many orgasms that night building throughout every muscle.

It was going to be a long night….

[emelinstriker]

{Twice As Bad AU} Wukong & Macaque ♤ Even Little Things

Art drawn by me.

My little take on @semisolidmind's TAB AU due to peeps asking me to cover that as an X Reader ever since that one doodle I once did for it.

As usual, tweaked some things a bit in the AU just for the sake of the plot- And also cuz I haven't really kept track of all the canon things in the AU, so I'm mostly just using the basic premise of the AU and added/removed some things for the story twist, humor and all that. So please don't take it as canon y'all-

Also, I speedran this within three days to post it earlier than planned, so... Happy birthday, Semi! Have 4k words of ya bois as birthday gift, I guess. :D

TW: Descriptions of death and gore

[TL;DR] Monke have 'yummy' berry if customer have coin.

♤ ~ Emotional Mix ~ ♤

It started out as a regular day at the market for you.

You owned a little stall where you would sell berries you and your little monkey friends collected. You kept on insisting that you wanted to collect them on your own, but the two ginger-furred and dark-furred monkeys just wouldn't leave you alone. Though, their kindness and willingness to help you did prove useful in the end. You managed to garner a lot of berries by the end of the day. How they managed to get them all? You would never know. You didn't exactly question it much either due to how many you were able to sell. Sales were pretty good today as well... And as per usual, your two little monkeys were practically guarding you and your stall, which you found really adorable. They looked like two innocent and fluffy puppies looking out for their beloved owner. And their cuteness did definitely contribute to your berry selling success.

Though, while they were pretty quiet and polite towards your customers that were just there to buy berries, there were some they truly didn't like to have around you at all... More specifically, those who showed even the slightest bit of romantic interest towards you.

Especially that farmer boy.

God, they really hated that guy for some reason.

Even if they just saw him walk across the street, far away from where you actually were, they would already start letting out aggressive sounds of pure hatred. Meanwhile you would just awkwardly wave at the poor guy. Though, besides the few customers that had interest in you, your monkeys were pretty well-behaved when you were around. You found it adorable how they would even help fill up tiny bags with berries like little helpers. And if they weren't doing that, they would either sit or lie around on your stall or cling onto you while you worked. They especially loved body contact with you, so they mostly clung onto you. All they wanted in return for their help was your affection, oddly enough. No snack either, just affection. You only had to give them little kisses or cuddle them a bit and they were already melting in your arms. Another cute thing they would do whenever you were selling berries was to give you gifts...

Well, it certainly sounds cute in theory.

However, their gifts ranged from not only some simple shiny rocks and flowers, but also to literal little animals and insects... Which were usually alive whenever they were the dark-furred monkey's gift, but were most definitely always dead in the ginger-furred monkey's case. Of course, you would still praise them as to not upset them... And while they were highly aware of your discomfort whenever they brought in animals and insects, they just ignored it. Then again, you never thought much of it since in your eyes, they were just monkeys. Just two simple, silly, little monkeys. Why would they respect your discomforts when they couldn't even talk?

Well, despite your little monkeys not being able to talk to you, they did seem to understand you. Which felt really nice, considering most in the village either didn't trust you or enjoy talking to you... So their company was very endearing and appreciated.

Especially in certain moments...

"What do you mean you're out of berries?" A tough-looking man asked, definitely pissed off. So you tried to stay calm and defuse the situation as best as you could.

"Sorry, sir... But all berries are already sold out. The last batch was sold a few minutes ago. B-But you could come back tomorrow and-" "I don't have the fucking time to come back tomorrow! I need those berries now!" He rudely cut you off.

"I, uh, understand, sir, but-" "I know you still have berries in stock! I can see a bunch in the basket over there!" He cut you off again, yelling in your face as he pointed towards the basket behind you. You grimaced a little in discomfort.

"Sir, those are berries I'll deliver after work to a woman who already paid for them-" "Then give her that money back or some shit, will ya?! Just give me those damn berries instead already!" The man looked like he would jump behind the stall's counter any moment now to launch himself at you, when you suddenly heard very familiar growling coming from behind the man... He turned around, only to see two small monkeys glaring furiously at him.

The man scoffed. "The fuck are those doing here? Are those your pets or some shit?" You gave your monkeys worried glances, not wanting them to get involved and get hurt. This man looked tough and would have no problem getting rid of two little monkeys...

But your monkeys were different.

Instead of backing down, they slowly approached the man aggressively on all fours. Their tails were dangerously swaying behind them as they snarled at him... While they could tolerate the presence of customers in most cases, this was one of the few cases where they really were just out to murder. All they needed was an opening...

Wukong then seemingly stopped snarling for a moment as he whispered something extremely quietly, to which Macaque nodded. While Macaque continued to aggressively approach the man, his brother gave the man one last glare before running up to you instead, launching himself at you. Startled, you stumbled back a bit as he jumps at you. And with seemingly extreme strength, he managed to knock you down to the ground behind your stall. Your stall obscured your vision of the man and your other monkey. You groaned a bit in pain before you looked at the ginger-furred monkey, who just smiled at you with a love-struck gaze. He didn't attack you or anything, his tail just swayed happily as he nuzzled you. You, of course, were confused by his sudden mood change. "Why did you tackle me-"

Then, you heard a scream from the man for just a split second before the other monkey's snarling suddenly stopped. Everything was silent. Suspicious and confused, you held the ginger-furred monkey against your chest while he continued to happily nuzzle into you. You then stood back up and looked towards the front of your stall... The man was gone. But the dark-furred monkey was still there, sitting contently like a good boy where the man once was. His tail happily swayed behind him as well as if nothing ever happened just now...

The man's decomposing body was found hanging from a tree by his own guts in the forest a few days later. According to those who found his corpse, his body was completely mangled. His face was seemingly ripped or mauled off, displaying his skull with his eyes missing. His rib cage seemed to have been crushed and his abdomen was torn wide open. Part of his organs were missing, and a single bloody peach was found buried inside the body. His tongue was ripped off and literally stuffed down his throat, as if it were there to tell him to forever keep quiet... Not to mention all his broken bones that were not just simply snapped, but crushed into pieces. The entire scene was extremely horrifying for those that saw his remains. Some sort of brutal demon must've killed him. Yet the reasons were unknown as to why this man would be murdered in such a gruesome way... What did the man think in his last moments? Was he immediately dead or was he tortured alive? The people of the village seemed to mentally point their fingers in your direction, however. Especially due to how you were one of the last people they saw him with.

That was just one of the strange happenings surrounding you and your monkey companions.

Something else the villagers noticed was the other rather recent murder cases looked similar, though less brutal. Whoever, or whatever, killed the other people also killed this man. But the other victims usually only had their abdomens be ripped open and their organs ripped out, for whatever reason... Though, they all were found with a single bloody peach inside them.

And of course, villagers kept you in mind as a major suspect. Which was sort of understandable since all those people were people who basically told you to get lost and fuck off, telling you that you don't belong in their community. The more people suspected you to be at least involve in the serial murders, the less people would stop by your berry stall. Which in turn made you feel sad and confused... Did you do something wrong?

Your two little monkeys noticed your guilt and self-doubt creeping in, and they didn't like seeing you beat yourself like this over whatever those other humans thought of you.

Thus, they decided now was the time to make themselves known and 'save' you from this unworthy village.

And what better way than to go out with a bang?

So, they decided to help 'sell' some berry bags personally and directly. They packed them up themselves again and snuck into peoples' houses, taking some of their coins and leaving a bag of berries everywhere they went. The two of them were extremely helpful. They came back to you with coins everytime, so you assumed they managed to sell their little bags to happy customers. All would be fine again soon...

...At least, that's what you had hoped.

News spread fast in the village.

A death was reported in the east.

Another further north.

Few more in the west.

The southern area seemed to have multiple dead people already...

People were dropping dead like flies everywhere within the span of just a single day...

The entire panic rising within the village only seemed to enhance your uneasiness as well. You were mostly outside around your stall after all... What if this so called serial killer found you? Or perhaps there was a deadly virus going around and you shouldn't even be outside in the first place...

You held your monkeys close in worry as you feared for their and your own safety, standing behind your stall once more. While you were feeling uneasy, your monkey companions only seemed all too happy and content with no care in the world as you let them nuzzle into you with cute little chirps. Sighing, you looked at all the berries you still haven't managed to sell. Feeling a little hungry, you decided to eat a few of the berries you had. After taking one of the berry bags the monkeys had packed, you grabbed a few of the berries and were about to eat them.

Suddenly, the ginger-furred one stopped you by quickly switching from clinging onto your chest to clinging onto the arm that was holding the berries, stretching his body from your arm up to your hand to clasp his own little hands around it, keeping you from eating the berry. He looked at you with seemingly slightly concerned eyes, shaking his head as he let out quiet noises, which sounded like he was begging you not to eat them. It was strange how strong this little monkey actually was... His tiny hands were preventing you from even opening your hand. The dark-furred monkey also seemed to join in on stopping you from consuming those berries as he nuzzles into your neck, wrapping his tail around the arm that's holding the bag. The sight must've looked funny to others if they were passing by, to be honest.

Confused, you decide to just listen to the monkeys and not eat the berries... Maybe they were just upset that you'd wanna unpack and eat the berries they had so nicely packed for customers earlier. Which would make sense.

Another day had passed and...

Where was everyone?

You set up your bags at your stall and were patiently waiting for someone, anyone, to even just walk past. However, everything was silent for a few hours. Dead silent for a village that had a bunch of gossip going around. Not even your monkey companions were following you this morning, oddly enough. This only added to your fear since those little guys were like your comfort pets.

Another hour passed and finally some sound was heard in the distance. Were those... screams?

Now more on edge than ever, you decided that maybe you should sit this day out on trying to sell... You didn't exactly want to lose your life to some massacre or virus after all. A bit panicked by the scream, you quickly tried to pack up the little berry bags into a basket. But as you were starting to pack up, you could hear a male voice fake coughing to grab your attention. Startled by the sudden noise after all the dead silence, you almost dropped one bag before you turned to face the person in front of your stall... Or, uh... Monkey...?

This dark-furred monkey seemed familiar... Maybe he was related to one of your little monkey friends?

He smirked at you as he leaned against the stall, his tail swaying slowly behind him. "Hey there, sugarplum. Did I arrive a bit too late? My brother and I heard you sell delicious berries here."

You waved your hand dismissively, nervous as you never had a monkey, or rather a demon in this case, being a customer. The nickname was also making you a little nervous, but maybe he was just one of those people who give everyone they see nicknames. "Oh- No, no- You're not late- I just... Didn't think I would get any customers today..."

He leaned in a bit closer to you. "Oh? Why's that? Aren't your berries said to be the best in this village though?"

"Uh, well... Yes, but usually some customers would've already bought some at this time in the day... But you'd be my first customer today." You admitted sheepishly. He only seemed to grin... You didn't know he could hear your anxious heartbeat. He knew you didn't exactly feel safe. But you were still trying to be calm and polite towards even a dangerous-looking demon him. Which he found cute. That's when his ear twitched as he heard something you couldn't hear, making his grin turn into a more... seductive one.

"I'm actually not here to buy any of those bags you're offering. I am interested in one specific berry from your stall, however."

You blinked at him in confusion. "...What berry? They're all pretty much the same?"

"Not all of them." He responded. The simian chuckled as he looked at you with intent. "There's one berry my brother and I have been keeping a close eye on for quite a while now, and we want to claim that berry for ourselves... It simply sticks out. Just like a delicious peach amongst a bunch of mediocre berries. My brother's words, not mine. But I do have to agree with him on this one." He then leaned in a little closer to you, still giving you this sort of seductive grin. "And as an honorable and kind merchant, surely you would love to fulfill a customer's simple request... Right?"

His deep voice made him sound so smooth, but his words and the way he said them also just sounded... Off... This was not a regular exchange for food, that much you could tell. But before you could reply, you heard another voice coming from behind you. "Well, well, well... How's business? Did I miss anything, Macaque?" You turned around in shock, noticing a ginger-furred simian behind you. Some sort of red and gold staff is held loosely on his shoulder as he smirked. Though, the thing that set you off the most were the clear blood spots on his fur, his clothes, and especially on one side of his staff...

"Nah, you didn't miss a thing. I was just mentioning what we wanted to 'buy'." Macaque responded with a shrug as he leaned back a bit, though still resting with his arms on the stall's counter.

They could clearly tell you were scared. And of course, as your beloved monkeys, they wanted to make you feel as comfortable around them as possible. So, maybe a little bit of an introduction would make things easier. The ginger-furred monkey raised his free hand with a little wave, smiling kindly as if he didn't just murder humans a few minutes ago. "Hey, peaches! My name is Sun Wukong. Legendary Monkey King and Great Sage Equal To Heaven! Also strongest demon you'll ever see as well as the most sexy monkey in existence- Aaaanyway, this is my sworn brother, and second-in-command, the Six-Eared Macaque." He said to break the ice, gesturing towards the dark-furred monkey as well.

"Just call me Macaque. And him Wukong." Macaque added with a bit of a shrugging hand motion. Then he moves his hand just enough to point towards his brother with a taunting, shit-eating grin. "It's much easier than Six-Eared Macaque and whatever the fuck long ass title Wukong decided to give himself." He grins smugly, to which Wukong huffs in a rather arrogant way.

"Well, excuse me for having achieved more in life than you." Wukong retorted.

"Great Sage Equal To Heaven was not an achievement if you practically begged for it."

"But Warlord was."

"You didn't even name that title in your introduction though??"

"I didn't wanna make them feel more anxious than they already are, okay??"

"And since when are you the most sexy monkey in existence?? That's bullshit and you know it."

"Hey! That title may be a tiny bit opinion-based, but it is an accurate description of me."

"Could you stop letting your ego go to your head for like five minutes? I'm still the brains in this duo. And the brain doesn't need the muscle's ego surrounding it."

"...Okay, now this is getting fucking personal, you goddamn hypocrite-"

To be honest, you weren't exactly scared at this moment anymore, just confused and uncomfortable due to them arguing and practically being so close to just claw at each other's throats over petty titles. Macaque rolled his eyes at Wukong before turning back to you, trying to get back on topic to avoid Wukong getting pissed at him over nothing again. "So about that 'peach amongst berries' talk-" Suddenly, Wukong quickly wrapped an arm around you, pulling you against his blood-stained armor with a grin. His annoyed mood immediately flipped like a switch to a more love-struck one again.

"Oh? Did our peaches agree? Was my pick-up line enough to convince them~? Did you tell them about the real us yet?" He hummed. You grimaced a bit in discomfort at him suddenly touching you so casually. Especially because you could tell he reeked of death... Was... Was he the one who killed those people...? The more you thought about it, the more connections clicked in your mind... The peach references, the way people described the latest murder of the man who yelled at you, the fact that for some reason it's all connected to literal demon monkeys...

Your heartbeat rose up, making Macaque smirk. "Well, not verbally... But I think they're starting to understand what's happening on their own. What a smart human we've picked!"

"Y-You- Wh- Wait what-" You stammered out in shock, definitely now more scared than ever before. Wukong quickly picked you up into his arms after making his staff seemingly disappear into thin air. His strength was no joke either as he clearly didn't struggle at all in holding you. His tail was happily moving behind him in excitement.

"C'mon, Macaque. We got what we came here for." Wukong stated as he walked a bit further away from your stall. You attempted to escape by trying to move out of his grip, but despite barely even gripping onto you, you were simply just flailing around a bit, clearly unable to escape your cage that were his arms. He simply ignored your attempt at an escape as he smiled contently, giving you a very familiar love-struck look...

That reminded you of your little monkey companions. Your heartbeat spiked and Macaque took notice. He raised an eyebrow at you in confusion because your heartbeat didn't change much since you started flailing in Wukong's arms. "Is something wrong, (Y/N)?"

You stopped in shock, looking at the dark-furred monkey with wide eyes. "W-Wh... H-How do you know my name?"

Ah. Right, right. You didn't know yet.

Macaque chuckled as he cupped your cheek with you still in his brother's arms. "Well, you see... We sorta picked up your name during the weeks, or I guess months at this point, when we were helping you around the village. You know, packing up berries and all that... We even made sure the latest batches had the freshest type of toxin for the best quality!" He grinned maliciously as he crossed his arms. Your mouth hung agape in shock as some tears gathered in your eyes...

"You... Y-You were those two monkeys...?" You asked quietly in disbelief... All those deaths... If they put those toxic berries in the bags you were paid for... Didn't that automatically make you a form of accomplice in their schemes? And you got paid for basically allowing them to kill all these people. You started to sob, "...Oh my god... No, no, no... This- T-This can't be- I-I would never h-help... kill- I-I d-didn't mean t-to-"

Wukong then leaned his head down a bit to kiss your forehead with a faint blush and a soft smile. "Shhh... It's fine, peaches. Don't cry. You can just put all the blame on us if that helps." He said quietly, trying to sound comforting. The warlord clearly didn't care about all the dead people, he only cared about wanting to see you smile. He summoned some form of cloud and hopped onto it with you still trapped in his arms. Then he gave his second-in-command a malicious grin. "Macaque, I'll take them home. Sweep through the village one last time. If anyone is still alive, you know what to do."

Macaque returned his own malicious grin as he bowed a little. And with his bow, a shadow-like portal opened up beneath him, swallowing him into the ground. Meanwhile, you could only helplessly watch as Wukong made his cloud fly high up into the skies at pretty high speeds. If you managed to escape his grasp now, you would just be dead. Looking back towards your village, you could see bodies lying outside, most had no blood as they probably died to the berries, but some were clearly attacked earlier by Wukong... You also witnessed houses collapsing within giant flames...

Even the sky above the village itself seemed to look doomed from afar...

You could even still see another human begging for help before being tortured by Macaque's shadows...

You were just silently crying as Wukong took you away to Flower Fruit Mountain, which would soon become your new home. Whether you would like it or not. You were theirs now. And it all simply started with some small berries...

If only you had known that even the littlest of things could snowball you down to hell.

[ Masterlist ]

[wooahaes]

taste test

pairing: non-idol!jun x gn!reader

prompt: soulmate au series. 11/13

word count: 3.9k~

warnings: major food mentions throughout the entire fic!! mentions of reader being impulsive at some points.

daisy’s notes: i love when i get to write jun just being a sweetie btw

summary: Jun has grown accustomed to the way his soulmate eats. He hopes they don’t hate him for the way he snacks and sneaks bites of his cooking, or for the way he experiments in the kitchen sometime. But running a restaurant means he’s constantly evolving the menu… So if it leads the two of you together, then that’s good, right?

Jun turned ten years old and was… upset, to say the least, that he didn’t have a soulmate. His mother had smoothed his hair back gently and told him not to worry. If he didn’t have a soulmate, it would change nothing about him. He was still the smart little guy she had raised so lovingly, and it took nothing away from his worth. And if he did have a soulmate, then hopefully he would find them one day if so he chose. She supported him wholeheartedly, and Jun would look back on the memory with nothing but undying love for his mother for handling the situation so well. Of course, it took a few days for Jun to realize that the flavors he kept tasting on the back of his tongue were more than just cravings and his imagination… but that didn’t change the gentle comfort his mother had given him. She’d held his hand at the doctor, too, and throughout the tests to make sure that all was well with him.

His doctor had straightened up the papers on his desk—results of said tests, no doubt—and looked at Jun’s mother. “It’s the most common sign,” he said, and relief crossed her face immediately. “But it still happens.”

His mom had questions. Jun just focused on the lemon-flavored lollipop he’d been given, mind wandering a bit. Apparently, it was common enough for doctors to hand them out to kids to soften the blow of whatever came next in visits like this. Soulmates were normal enough, but Jun knew as much as his mother that some people had… less ideal soulmate marks. One of his classmates felt her soulmate’s pain (sometimes so bad that she cried, the feeling so new to someone with only so many years of life lived). One of his teacher’s had yet to meet her soulmate at the beginning of the year, only for sparks to literally fly when she ran into a new member of staff an hour later. None of his classmates had been hurt by the slight shock, but Jun couldn’t imagine having a mark like that—even if his teacher swore that it just felt soothing. Adults lied to kids all the time just to put on a brave face, after all.

It’d been a lie to say that Jun’s sign had no influence on him and his life. He had learned to cook alongside his mother and step-father so that he could take care of himself in the future, yes… but it did help him when he was trying to figure out what his soulmate was eating. His taste buds matured more and more with age, and eventually he liked to think he had a pretty solid understanding of what his soulmate was eating. He could pick out the sweetness of vanilla ice cream on apple pie, the buttery crust and cinnamon and ginger and nutmeg pointing him in the right direction. He knew the umami of different meats and the savory sauces they were cooked in. He had to adapt sometimes based on what he had available… but Jun would meet those cravings he felt, just to understand his soulmate a little better. Not that anyone complained when he did: his family adored his cooking, his friends loved a free meal, and his coworkers weren’t going to turn down leftover cookies and whatnot when he brought them in during his work study job in college. What was the point in making so much food if he couldn’t ensure the people he cared for were well fed?

That was what led him to dropping out of one school (sorry, dreams of being an actor) and pursuing culinary school in the end. He went through years of long hours and endless studying just to end up where he was now: standing in front of an empty building, arms folded across his chest. A few of his friends stood there with him, admiring the place he was officially renting out. It had taken a while to save up and get approved for loans and square away all of the business side of things (and even still, he had orders to make and so, so much more work ahead of him)... But holding the keys in his hand made it all real. 

This was step one of many for finding his place. And if it led his soulmate to him, then he would be happy.

Everything was wrong, and Jun couldn’t figure out what the problem was.

The restaurant was doing well, thankfully. He wasn’t in the red, although business could be better. People liked having authentic Chinese cuisine, and Jun was more than happy to provide it and share more of his heritage… and occasionally pack a takeout container a little more full for the college student who looked on the edge of a breakdown. But the restaurant could be doing better, making more money, and that meant he needed to make adjustments. He’d gone over survey cards, trying to figure out what needed to be fixed, and that was what led him to now. He’d been cooped up in his apartment for days now, trying to perfect a dish from his childhood that he couldn’t get right. Mingyu was sitting at the counter, muttering something to Minghao as the two (alongside Seokmin) tried to figure out what element was missing from it all. Seokmin suggested something sweet, but Jun had shot it down when Seokmin suggested a little more sugar: he’d already tried adjusting the amount, sorry. He’d even tried brown sugar, honey, and plenty of other alternatives, just to see if maybe he’d been going in the wrong direction.

One of his arms was draped over his eyes as he laid across the couch. What was missing…? He could call his mom, but part of him wanted to figure it out for himself. The answer was right there on the tip of his tongue, his lips almost tingling in the strangest way.

“It feels like it should be obvious,” Seokmin sighed, toying with the bracelet around his wrist. “Shouldn’t it be?”

It was. It had to be. That was why it was so infuriating. Jun turned over with another sigh, shutting his eyes. It was as if the answer was burning within him now, yet still out of reach. 

“Maybe it isn’t sweet,” Mingyu picked up another piece of chicken, holding it up to the light for a moment, as though it’d give him the answer. “It’s already sweet as it is… I don’t think making it sweeter would help.”

That burning had traveled to the back of his tongue now, and he jerked up. Wait a second. What the hell was his soulmate eating? He knit his brow together, frowning. This wasn’t the time for them to be messing around with some spice challenge—and judging by the cold, mild taste that subdued that heat, that must have been what they were doing. Yet once the taste of milk had disappeared, the burning was already back. What the hell was his soulmate doing? That mild taste washed over his tongue again after a moment, only to be followed again by a heat that nearly made his eyes water.

Jun tore off of the couch, immediately rushing to the cabinets. That cooling sensation hit him again, and the burning never came back, but Jun could see great, big neon signs when they were right in front of him. He’d added a little to begin with, but maybe…

“Jun?” Minghao watched as Jun pulled a container from the cabinet, making his way over to the pot. “What are you?”

He mixed in more red pepper flakes, far more than he’d done the first time. “It’s not spicy enough.”

Seokmin blinked in confusion, looking from Jun to the other two friends present. “I thought it wasn’t supposed to be that spicy.” 

“It’s still supposed to have a kick,” Minghao said, sniffling. Of course Minghao wouldn’t have caught it: the poor guy was still recovering from a cold. “Jun, I thought you—”

Jun tested the sauce, shutting his eyes… and there it was. How the hell did you…? Maybe you were like him and understood food, too. Or maybe you remembered the previous times he’d eaten this dish and realized it wasn’t burning your mouth enough. The only real question that remained was what the hell did you decide to eat? He paused, wondering if you were out there, eating raw peppers or squirting hot sauce into your mouth just to send him a sign. He paused, looking down at the bottle of red pepper flakes. Now that he was thinking about it, the taste was exactly what he was looking for—

No. You didn’t. No. He looked up, brows raising as he processed this new theory. Some people could handle red peppers well, but apparently you couldn’t (at least not raw) considering you had to douse the capsaicin with milk or something quickly to try and spare yourself that pain. All of it was just to send him this signal that something was missing and you knew what it was. He found himself smiling. He hadn’t even met you yet, and already he was a little endeared to you.

He returned the favor to you later, though. The cravings hit him in that weird way that made him feel like you were taste testing, and Jun didn’t think twice before shoving half a lemon into his mouth. He’d recognize the dish you were making later, but he didn’t care about the weird looks that the others had given him. Minghao, who knew the deal, had given him this look that was a mix of understanding and downright disgust. 

Seungcheol had sighed, getting up from the table. “You’re so weird,” he said, making his way to the kitchen to get the other lemons. “Those were supposed to be a palate cleanser…”

He’d apologized profusely afterward, not realizing that people had paid him any attention, but he hoped you appreciated his help. Maybe he couldn’t help you directly in the way he’d begun yearning to… but he was fine with making a fool of himself like this to help you in return. After all, that’s what a soulmate was for… Right?

“Jun.”

So maybe it was another one of those nights. And maybe Jun messaged the group chat to see who wanted to come with him to get ice cream this late. What was so wrong with that? Soonyoung sat across from him, a cup of sorbet in front of him that he kept pushing around with a pink plastic spoon. Jihoon’s lips were closed around a bright blue one, his frozen yogurt melting in its cup as he watched Jun carefully. And Wonwoo sat beside him, phone in one hand as he held a cone in the other. Jun had carefully picked out every single part of the little sundae that sat in front of him now: the flavor from the back of his tongue, the toppings what he thought you were out there eating on your own sundae… Was this your favorite? Or was it just what you wanted today? He recognized some of the flavors from past times, and yet today the craving was strong enough to drag him out of bed.

“Hm?” A bright green spoon hung from his own mouth, and all he could taste was plastic now. His mind had wandered a bit too much again, but… that was normal when he had his soulmate on his mind. All he wanted to do was meet you and know you. “Yes?”

“You’re thinking about them again,” Wonwoo said in a low, calming voice. There was no accusation in it, no teasing jab at him for getting caught up in silly, sappy thoughts again. Not that his friends teased him for it often—they did, but their teasing was usually saved for Mingyu and Chan and Seungcheol. “Is something on your mind?”

There it was. That’s what they’d all been wondering, after all: the concern was written on their faces, plain as day. Jun pulled the spoon from his mouth, “I’m okay. Just… thinking.” 

“About?” Soonyoung’s foot nudged against Jun’s in an attempt to prod more information from him. “You can share if you’d like.” 

He pressed his lips together, trying to figure out where to start. He had a lot of thoughts about you—the same as anyone would, right? He knew that you most likely wondered about who he was as a person. “I hope they’re kind.” 

No one said anything yet, just to give him more space to speak as he processed his thoughts.

“I think… I used to have all of these ideas for what I wanted in a person. I wanted them to look a certain way, to act a certain way…” He trailed off. “And… I think now I can’t help but think that all I want is someone I can be happy with. Someone who accepts me for me.” He scooped another bit of his ice cream up, pausing for a moment before eating it. “Someone who I can accept, too.” 

“You will,” Jihoon spoke up immediately. “Accept them. I think… I think you’ll be happy with them.” 

Soonyoung’s eyes crinkled in delight, “They’ve burned their taste buds for you before. I think they’ll be perfect for you.”

It earned a warm chuckle from Jun, smiling to himself again. He always found himself smiling when you were on his mind, and he hadn’t even met you yet. How was he supposed to go through his days when he did meet you? The same way the others did after meeting their soulmates, he assumed. Was it strange to wonder if you were like him? A little odd at times, but warm and caring and silly?

“He’s gone,” Wonwoo gently teased, smiling to himself. His phone lit up a second later from my love and Wonwoo, too, was gone with that bashful look on his face. Wonwoo had never been the kind of person who yelled his love from rooftops, but showed it in the way his eyes always seemed to sparkle a little more, heart fluttering smiles and rosy cheeks to define it. 

“You are, too,” Jihoon chuckled. Yet it was Jihoon who quietly loved his soulmate, too, always mindful of their limits in the way they were mindful of him and his limits. Jun had seen them interact a few times, and he saw the way he’d wordlessly take his soulmate’s hand when the crowds were thicker, and didn’t let go when they were through it. Little displays of affection that he’d never comment on, just to spare Jihoon the embarrassment of being called out for it.

Jun watched Soonyoung for a moment, just to be aware of him. Soulmate talk went fine with him most of the time, but everyone knew that Soonyoung (just as Seokmin did) had his moments of insecurity with his own lack of a sign. Yet he was smiling to himself, and immediately jumped to teasing Jihoon for something that he’d said about his soulmate not long ago. It turned the latter’s cheeks bright red as he complained, waving him off. So what if he liked his soulmate? That’s what they were there for, right? They were supposed to be someone that he liked. And yet Wonwoo had chuckled, joining in on the teasing as well.

Jun just smiled to himself, savoring the sweetness of the moment and the ice cream.

For the most part, being friends with Jun meant they had special privileges. When Seungcheol asked if they could all meet up close to closing so he could share some special news (with the promise that at least he would help close up for the night), Jun had agreed easily enough. Not everyone could make it, but Jun carried out a tray of dishes to set in front of those present. Seungcheol had been talking about how different his life felt now that he could see color, no longer relying on which light was lit for traffic lights or asking people for the right color apple. He'd pulled over a chair, breaking into a pair of chopsticks so he could reach out and snag a dumpling while he took a few minutes to rest.

"Also... All of you are terrible!" Seungcheol huffed. "I told Seungkwan first and he immediately started sending me pictures of myself in ugly outfits you all swore went together!"

It earned a snort from Jeonghan, who'd been busy typing something out on his phone. "We didn't do it all the time, you know."

Seokmin was staring at his watch the entire time, and Jun reached out, fingers brushing his bicep. "Are you okay?"

"Just waiting for something," he said. Then he looked up, the realization dawning on him as he shook his head. "Sorry! Sorry, I'm fine. Just..." He looked at the door again. "Waiting."

Seungcheol changed the topic away from the outfits he was debating with Joshua (no, he did not like that neon shirt, thank you), "We're going out on Tuesday, actually. I think you guys will like them..."

Jun smiled to himself. It was nice seeing Seungcheol so at ease. The idea of never meeting his soulmate had been weighing on him for a while now, and even more-so since everyone else seemed to be finding their soulmate over the past year. Before he could join the conversation, he saw Seokmin getting up and heading toward the computer right as the door opened, a little bell jingling. Jun excused himself from the group as Seungcheol continued on about his soulmate, making his way over to the counter.

"Sorry," the customer had said, and Jun had slid the menu across to you without much thought. "My friend, Minho, came here with a couple friends and said you might be able to help?"

Jun just blinked in confusion. "I'm sorry. With...?"

"My soulmate had this dish a few days ago," you rested your hands on the counter, "and I've managed to narrow it down based on a lot of Googling. But there's a couple things I'm not sure about, but Minho said what I kept describing sounded like Chinese food, and--"

Jun waved a hand. "I understand," he said. "I have the same sign."

You sighed in relief. "Good. It's not the rarest sign, but people don't always get it since it’s still uncommon, y'know? Your soulmate must be lucky, though," you drummed your fingers against the counter. "Also... Sorry about coming in this late. I saw you're closing in an hour, and—”

Jun stopped you there. "It's okay," he insisted. "It's what I'm here for. Just tell me what--"

"Jun," Seokmin called out, looking up from the monitor. "There's a request for takeout. I'm gonna confirm it, alright?"

Jun waved him on, and turned back to you. "Sorry. The food...?"

You'd started to rattle off what you'd tasted days ago, saying something about how the craving never fully left you. Jun helped square you away, telling you to sit wherever you'd like and he'd have your food out as soon as he could. He made his way to the computer where Seokmin stood, brows knit tightly together.

"Is everything okay?" He asked, keeping his voice low. "You seem... different."

Seokmin shook his head. "The ticket's on the line," he kept his eyes glued to the screen. "Just... thought I recognized the name."

Jun shrugged it off and went to work, Mingyu having already made his way back into the kitchen to help. Soon enough, several orders have been made and plated. Mingyu walked away, making his way to greet you while Jun uncapped a sharpie with his teeth. Seokmin watched as Jun drew a little cat onto the corner of one of the lids, and then a little flower next to it.

"Someone else could pick up the order," Jun said after capping the marker again. "If you don't want to go."

"No!" Seokmin paused, waving a hand. "I mean--The money is good, and my bike is outside. I'll try to be back to help clean up." He tied the bag after throwing in a few utensils and fortune cookies, pausing before he turned away. "Jun?"

He looked up from where he was tidying things up behind the counter. "Hm?"

Seokmin went to speak, and then turned, gazing at where you sat alone. He shook his head, turning back to Jun. "Actually... Don't worry about it."

Jun was definitely going to call Seokmin in the morning if he didn't make it back before they all left. He watched as he made his way out of the restaurant, waving to the others before going out for a late night delivery, and Jun sighed. Maybe he was having an off day. He'd mention it to Minghao if nothing else, and maybe he'd check on him tonight. He turned, grabbing a rag on his way back into the kitchen so that he could start cleaning up again, only to catch himself freezing once he recognized something.

That blend of spices. The sauce on your meal. He turned, staring at you as he watched you eat in peace. You. He dropped the rag, body moving on its own as if you were a magnet drawing him in. He slowed to a stop, unsure of what to say. You looked up, confused for a moment.

"I think..." His voice came out hoarse and quiet, and he cleared his throat. "I... I was perfecting this recipe a few days ago."

You stared at him. "Huh?"

"This is—This is the improved version," he said, hands curling around the back of an empty chair. Just say it, a voice in his head said. All he needed to say were those three words, and yet they felt lodged in his throat.

"You're...?" You dropped your chopsticks with a gasp, standing up. "You?!"

Jun didn't know whether to be hurt by that or not. "Would you rather I not be—”

"I have eaten so many stupid things for you!" You said, loud enough to get the attention of Jun's friends. "And--And you kept eating stupid things for me when I couldn't get the recipe right!"

He laughed. "I know—"

"Oh my god," you said. "No wonder you were always right. I mean, sometimes it didn't really help because I didn't have the ingredients, but—but you still tried!" You'd laughed, warm and vibrant. "Oh my god—I'm sorry, I just—No wonder you knew what I was talking about."

Jun caught a glimpse of his friends all silently watching, and he waved them off. "I..." His face was burning, and he started patting himself down to find his phone. "I really don't want to talk more in front of my friends."

You glanced over to them, and then nodded. "Yeah! Yeah, sorry, I just—I really should have come with Minho that time, huh?"

"Maybe..." He'd plucked his phone from his back pocket. "I could buy you dinner? If you want—”

"I'd like that," you said, accepting his phone. You punched in your number before adding a little heart emoji by your name. "Now I can go straight to the source for my cravings."

He laughed softly again, holding his phone closer to his chest. "Whatever you want," he said. "Just say the word."

With a smile from you, Jun felt his world change entirely. "I'll hold you to that, chef."

taglist: @twancingyunhao @wonuziex @synthetickitsune @staranghae @porridgesblog @weird-bookworm @bangchansbae @laylasbunbunny @bewoyewo

[konigsblog]

Hi! This is my first time asking something :D 

Do you do anything, not nsfw? And if so, what would some random könig headcanons you agree with? Like habits and stuff you’d think he’d do? (does that make sense lmao)

If you just do nsfw you could make them nsfw headcanons.. Or just combine both aha

**HII.. i do write for sfw and fluff, as well as angst it's just not really requested as much as smut :) but here, hope you enjoy this!!! 🌙

silly könig headcannons

⭒ mentions of weed use, fluff.. 🌷🎀

⭒könig who prefers cats over dogs. they're quieter and calmer, has a ginger cat called ‘spice’ that's fiesty to new people. he loves the animal to death, and hands it to his oma when he's on deployment.

⭒i've mentioned this before, but i feel like könig was in a band as a kid, just a school one. he played the drums and was pretty emo in his teenager years...

⭒he sleeps in the weirdest positions. he'll either wake up with his body contorted into different ways, his arms above his head and across his chest with his legs intertwined with eachother.

⭒he's an easily jealous person, always top of his classes and getting 100% on his tests. his mother always wanted the best outcome for her son, so she was shocked when he decided to join the kommando spezialkräfte instead of becoming a doctor or a lawyer.

⭒has 100% attempted to get up but fell because his legs were stuck and tangled in his bedsheets.

⭒gets second hand embarrassment far too easily. he's cringing on the inside when someone does/says something stupid.

⭒absolutely hates the summer. it's horrible; everybody's sweaty and stinks, missions make him want to peal his skin off. definitely prefers autumn/winter.

⭒his favourite food to eat whilst sick is soup, a special homemade soup him and his mother made together while growing up. her own special recipe that he only teaches to his closest of friends.

⭒loves late night conversations. they're so deep and understanding, chatting for hours 'til your jaw hurts and the sun his peaking through the curtains.

⭒either drinks black coffee, really bitter. or drinks the most sugary coffee ever, no in-between. (tell me your opinions)

⭒is a morning person. gets up early and has his breakfast, something quick and easy, like toast or porridge (oatmeal), has a morning shower 'nd everything. (i love adding salt to my porridge/oatmeal)

⭒hates when people say germany and austria are the same. will definitely have a whole rant about the differences 'til you understand fully.

⭒smokes weed a lot, pretty much an addict. he says it's to calm his nerves down but he gradually started doing it more and more often. a stoner fs.

⭒enjoys movies, a lot. he loves sitting down with a blanket beside him, covered in orange cat hair. will probably make a bowl of popcorn to eat whilst watching, but ends up eating it all before he's even 30 minutes in.

big, bear hugs. we all know that the big, brute and towering man gives amazing hugs, but he really wants to lay atop of you, to cage you with his warmth.

⭒has a tendency to over share, rants sometimes while pretending to be confident, finding anything to talk about before feeling a bit uncomfortable with what he'd said.

⭒isn't shy. it's my biggest pet peeve when people make könig out to be someone shy, scared, ect.. he's not shy, he's socially anxious, but that doesn't make him quiet. he either puts on a front and pretends to be confident with a cocky, loud personality.

⭒absolutely adores milk. he drinks like a gallon in two days, that's why he's 6’10.

⭒enjoys mint chocolate chip ice cream, hates strawberry, especially if they have chunks. (self projecting)

⭒enjoys doing the dishes, finds it satisfying. until he touches food and gags.

⭒avid banana hater, the texture to the taste, everything about it makes him feel ill.

⭒listens to music for hours, usually something rock or heavy metal, loud music in his ears and the loud explosions gives him some hearing damage.

⭒usually smells woodsy, fresh cut trees and vanilla.

⭒germaphobe. doesn't like being near people when they're sick and will avoid them, probably because he gets sick too easily, despite having a strong immune system.

⭒isn't a very emotional person, he has sympathy for others but can't express it through tears and emotions. he's cold and aggressive to the recruits, blaming them for his issues because he struggles taking blame and fault for situations and needs a punching bag.

⭒owned a fish when he was around 7, cried because it died. turns out it was alive and he saw it swim down the toilet. never got another fish again, traumatized.

⭒doesn't like being told he's in the wrong, will refuse and deny it 'til he's forced to either apologise or end the friendship.

⭒curly ginger, or wavy ginger, you can't change my mind.

⭒doesn't really understand tiktok that much, or instagram. not really something that he's interested in, but occasionally uses twitter for like 5 minutes.

⭒has anemia, or iron deficiency. takes a couple naps a day because he doesn't like taking his supplements.

these are all i could think off 😵‍💫 tell me your personal headcannons!!

banner credit; @cafekitsune

[starryhiraeth]

Toddler Headcannons

Acotar & Tog

PT 1 here-

Acotar pregnancy Headcannons

(Btw I’m so sorry it’s been so long, I’ve been doing my exams and I’ve been so busy with them but I’m back so please feel free to request anything)

(There might be spelling errors, idk I did read through it but it’s anyones guess at this point🤷‍♀️)

Rhys-

•He might as well shout from the tallest mountain that he has a daughter

•Will bring her EVERYWHERE, even high lord meetings, she’s just sitting there ether on yours or his lap, or she’s playing with toys in front of you

•You cant tell me Rhys isn’t the parent to dress his kids in thousands worth of designer clothes that they are going to grow out of within like a month anyway

•SPOILED FUCKING ROTTEN, she is SO cheeky, most times her giggles will echo throughout the halls. She has absolutely NO FILTER, at the high lords meeting she’ll point a Beron and repeat what she heard Rhys say when talking about him “Ginger cunt” it was quite an awkward meeting after that

• He literally can’t say no to her, and she knows this, all she has to do is the puppy/baby doll eyes and she gets whatever she wants

Azriel-

•Your two daughters are polar opposites, of course they had Illyrian wings and Az’s hair but they have your eyes and Az adores it, he’s very protective over his daughters

• Thea is much more gentle than her sister, when she was younger she was scared of her shadows but now they are a comfort to her and Az taught her how to wrap them around herself like a blanket (she has gotten stuck a couple times tho)

•She usually does that blanket thing whenever she’s snuggling with Az, they are both very calm so she defo a daddies girl

•Petra is a mini psycho, not really but she is much more wild, when she was a baby she would have massive tantrums whenever she wasn’t near you, she’s a mummas girl, and was never scared of her shadows but instead used them to freak out her sister #sistertings

•Like I said, Petra was much more wild, like she would act first and think later, this stresses Az out SO MUCH because he’s scared something will happen to her but it brings him comfort when he sees her finally calm while asleep laying on you whilst your on the sofa

Cass-

•Goes flying with Jaxs almost everyday, it gives you a mini heart attack every time but you trust that he won’t drop him, Cassian would rather fly into a volcano then put your son at risk

•Jaxs is prone to having tantrums, he doesn’t mean to be stroppy, he is just very emotional and doesn’t know how to explain is and so he cries and sometimes hits

•The first time Jaxs hit you in a tantrum, he was 2, it wasn’t hard and he tried hugging your after but Cassian was pissed, he put Jaxs on the naughty step and was scared his son would just get more violent, to which you had to explains that Jaxs just had big emotions for a small child and is learning

•After that you all fell asleep in an armchair, you in Cassian’s lap and Jaxs in yours, somehow it was beautiful and chaotic, Cassian held you both closer and couldn’t remember a time when he had been so happy

•When he’s not unhappy, Jaxs is the most rambunctious, you can’t count how many times he’s come to you with a red mark on his face because he ran into a glass door, he’s a sweetie though and such a carbon copy of his father, also I can totally see Cassian wearing those baby carries that go across the front, with no shame, he’s comfortable in his masculinity

(Btw, he’s still hung up on the fact that you didn’t let him call Jaxs Cassian Jr)

Lucien-

•Lucien is very warm, idk how to explain it but I imagine him giving very homely vibes

•Kalea is the same, she likes staying close to her parents and really likes nature, so much that every Saturday you all go on walks in the country side

•There, Kalea chases butterfly’s and picks flowers, though the orange ones are always here favourite

•She doesn’t really have a favourite parent, she just finds comfort in both of you and is a little cautious meeting those she doesn’t know but when she gets to know then she is super cute

•You two are Lucien’s entire world, nothing, and I mean nothing could make him happier then playing board games in pyjamas as a family, Infront if the firelight whilst the sun sets

Eris-

•So-Berons dead!

•Anyway, he DOES make tiny thrones next to yours and his for your sons, Idris is the older one but Maël is the one who acts older, Idris is the one accidentally setting trees on fire whilst Maël judges from a distance

• Maël will usually be found in your lap, playing with whatever necklace you have on and trying to relax when suddenly Idris, with the tips of his hair on fire comes running through the hallways yelling like a madman and 2 seconds later Eris is running after him

•After that Maël will probably mutter something like “They crazy mama” to which you just nodded

•Eris will make some serious changes to the decor in your house, whilst growing up all Eris remembers is the lifeless dark hallways so he changes that immediately, he is determined to be better than his father and give his children a happy childhood

Helion-

•Yuna is the probably one of the most spoiled children ever! And I mean like- if it were a modern AU her room would be worth like 30Mil by the age of 5

•Her favourite colour is gold and she is absolutely covered in it! Gold clothes, gold jewellery, gold glitter, gold everything!

•speaking of gold glitter, it’s everywhere! And if you think for one second that Helion is embarrassed to be covered in gold glitter then I’ll just let you know that he is the one who keeps buying it for her, He wears the glitter and wears it proud!

•Your lives are luxuriant! Just imagine, in a row, Helion, you, Yuna, all in massage chairs with cucumbers on your eyes and face masks in silk robes detailed with golden flakes…you lucky bitch

•Yuna will sit on her fathers throne ALL THE TIME, she’ll be high lady one day and she knows it, actually there were many times where you sat on Helion lap on your throne and Yuna had a mischievous smile on her face as she sat on her fathers throne all by herself

Dagdan-

•Okay so- Rune and Zara kind of hate each other, they are always arguing and I don’t mean normal sibling arguments, it actually worries you and since Dagdan thinks that twins are important and doesn’t like them fighting, he’ll sit them in a room and tie there hands together when they argue. Think:

•and as much as you feel bad for your babies it kinda funny

•the only time the twins get along is when they are making CHAOS

•Setting the throne on fire ✅

Trying to jump into the cauldron ✅

Stealing their great uncles crown and throwing in a nearby river ✅✅✅

•You and Dagdan love them but sometimes you’ll put them in Brannagh’s room and just take off, for her to look after them for a couple days 😂

Tamlin-

•soooo- there was a joke on my last post in the comments about Tamlins kid being born with dark hair and purple eyes and as funny as I thought that was, I’ll continue will my original plan😂

•Tamlin originally thought he would want a son but when your daughter arrived he couldn’t have ask for anything more or different, he loves her more than life and have every plant based nickname for her “Petal” “rose” “Lily flower” and the list goes on

•Persephone is the sweetest child that ever was, she had Tamlins hair and your eyes and lots and lots of freckles, she also has dimples ☺️

•She is know an as the “The realms Joy” throughout spring court and the people love the little princess though Tamlin sometimes worries that the harshness of become a ruler will kill her happiness, you assure him that she’ll have people by her side to help her

•She does this really cute thing where she’ll go up to someone, usually you or her father and ask what your favourite flower is, it doesn’t matter if you’ve already told her, she’s little okay? She forgets these things!, anyway she’ll ask your favourite flower and after you say it she’ll nod her head and march out of the room only to return 25 minutes later with basket full of the flower that you named and maybe a couple weeds she’s just so happy she could give them to you and Tamlin will have them put in a vase every time, weeds and all

Im so sorry this took like a century to write 😂

Anyway, exams are over so I can write so much more now and I’m open to requests

I’m honestly kind of surprised how much I wrote for Tamlin, but I guess it’s Tamlin fans lucky day, your welcome 😉

Anyway ummm

Bai?❤️

[aves-ery]

The Middle of the Night; W. Maximoff

pairing; wanda maximoff x fem!reader

summary; a soft moment with your girlfriend late at night

warnings; smut 18+ only, lots of fluff, thick thigh supremacy, thigh riding, fingering, finger sucking, hair pulling, first time mommy kink, very soft degrading

"baby!" you exclaimed, pulling your girlfriend's car door shut and kissing her over the middle console. she smiled into the kiss, cupping your face with her left hand.

when you pulled away, she left another small kiss on your lips, "happy one year, princess," she laughed while saying it, recalling last year when wanda showed up at your doorsteps, with flowers and chocolates.

"do i get presents?" you wiggled your eyebrows goofily and buckled yourself in. wanda smiled, setting the car in drive and driving out of your apartment parking lot.

"mhh maybe, all your gifts are at home," wanda said, slipping her hand into yours. you smiled, playing with the small box in your pocket.

when the two of you arrived at wanda's house, her two cats immediately were at your feet, rubbing against your ankles. you giggled, picking up the ginger one.

"hi baby girl," you nuzzled into her, kissing her soft face before setting her down and running after the black cat.

"princess, you know she doesn't like being picked up, she's going to attack you," it was too late, you were picking her up and kissing her face.

she meowed at you, the softest youve ever heard her meow, and dug her claws lightly into your shoulder. you let go, and she climbed onto your shoulders, settling in nicely.

"attack me my ass, she is the nicest cat witch ever," you joked, petting her head and finally taking your shoes off. wanda rolled her eyes, petting the cat's head, causing her to jump off.

"she hates me, i feed her. give her a home, love her, and she loves you more!" wanda joked, slipping her hands around your waist and bringing you close.

"everyone has a favorite parent, i happen to be it for miss bellatrix," you said, kissing wanda deeply. wanda smiled hard into the kiss, her hands gripping your ass and squeezing.

you internally rolled your eyes, pulling away and swatting her upper arm. "im hungry," you complained.

"only because i love you," wanda smiled, slapping your ass softly and going to the kitchen.

-

after dinner and the two of you watching 'friends' during, wanda took you to her bedroom, eyes covered with the palm of her hand.

wanda was excited, she'd been your friend for years, but this was her first as your girlfriend. wanda hesitantly uncovered your eyes, suddenly nervous.

you smiled at the bed, all your favorite things laid there (including the two cats). your favorite, however, was a handmade cork board full of moments together.

"oh baby i love it!" you exclaimed, plopping onto the bed and running your fingers over the pictures. most were polaroids signed with dates, but some simply looked like they were printed off. you smiled hard, looking at her with hearts practically in your eyes.

you grabbed wanda's hips, setting her on your lap. you ran your hands up her large thighs, growling lowly and squeezing.

"thank you, here's my gift... its not as extravagant as all this.. but.. yeah," you hummed, reaching in your sweatshirt pocket. you handed her the small jewelry box, a blush on your cheeks.

wanda raised an eyebrow, "are you proposing to me right now? i thought we agreed that i would.. you're cr- awh," wanda opened the box, her puppy eyes playing when she saw the small necklace engraved with a date, exactly one year ago.

"this is adorable, thank you," wanda whispered, kissing you with passion. you hummed, your hands sliding up her thighs again.

"god im obsessed with these," you hummed, squeezing her thighs. wanda blushed, her hands intertwining with yours. she pinned you down, laying on top of you.

"i love you," she said, burying her head into your chest. you smiled, running your right hand under the back of her shirt and mindlessly traced patterns.

"i love you too, wanda," you kissed the side of her head and cuddled into her farther.

midnight came fast, the two of you were watching mean girls on TV, completely awake. the two of you were spooning, your hands constantly running up and down wanda's thighs and stomach.

"you're gorgeous," you whispered into the air. a light chuckle came from wanda's lips, and she spun to hug you close.

she engulfed you, her lips meeting yours also. the kiss quickly got heated, your hands resting tightly on her hips. wanda pulled your hair softly, her tongue lightly grazing your, asking for an entrance.

when your tongues met, you gave up all dominance. you let her take over the kiss, let her hand travel to between your thighs and into your shorts.

"oh, princess you're soaked," wanda commented. you whined, bucking your hips into her fingers. her skilled fingers brushed over your clit, another whiny moan falling from your lips. "is this okay?" she asked, her hands stilling.

"mhm, just- mgh fuck- touch me," you begged. wanda smirked at you, her face lit up by the TV screen. two of her fingers slipped into you.

you moaned, your hand finding your girlfriends soft curls. wanda gasped, her thumb rubbing your clit. you tugged, encouraging your girlfriend to keep going.

she rubbed softly, her fingers curling into you in a steady, pleasurable rhythm. your legs tightened around her wrist, her rhythm slowing slightly.

"legs open, c'mon princess, you wanna cum, yeah?'' she encouraged. it only spurred you on, your body trembling. "such a dumb baby," wanda husked, her free hand prying your trembling legs open. her fingers immediately finding their pace again.

you chanted a string of curse words, followed by your lovers name, and lastly a soft arch of your back. when your orgasm passed, wanda kissed your jaw a few times and finally slipped her fingers into your mouth, allowing you to suck softly.

you moaned, your tongue cleaning her slender fingers off.

the two of you were off and on for a few more hours every so often waking up and adjusting your cuddling positions. when you woke up at four, wanda was kissing your arms softly, hers around your waist.

"hey," you said groggily, stretching slightly and moving to your back. wanda smiled adjusting so she was laying on your boobs, her fingers tracing letters on your tummy.

you pat her a few times, signaling you need to get up. she allowed you, and you stood up to use the restroom. one of the cats was in there, Daphne.

"hi my ginger baby," you purred, laughing when the ginger cat stretched out of the sink and followed you as you sat on the toilet. she plopped right onto your lap.

you washed your hands, the cat watching you, and you travelled back to the bedroom with the cat in your arms.

"daphne is so weird," you stated as she jumped into the bed and settled on wanda's stomach. wanda hummed tiredly, encouraging you to go on.

you settled to the left of wanda, petting the cat's head. "she sat on my lap while i was going to the bathroom, like who raised these babies?" you teased.

wanda pinched you jokingly, a squeal leaving your mouth. daphne looked at wanda before stretching and leaving.

"daphne was like, 'hell no', and dipped," wanda laughed. you giggled when her stomach shook, rising up to simply lay on top of her now. you mindlessly straddled her left leg.

you buried your face in wanda's neck, her hands slipping under your shirt. the two of you stayed like the for awhile, until you could see the sky lightly shimmer with blue.

wanda had moved her thigh, she didnt do it on purpose, but adjusted just right that her thigh brushed your clit ever so slightly.

"oh-" you moaned, covering your mouth after in embarrassment. wanda's eyes furrowed before she realized, and went to apologize.

however, you were already grinding into her thigh, "is-is this okay?" you asked, hands immediately going up to her locks.

wanda nodded, her hands stopping to hold your waist, "thats a good girl, just use my thigh, okay? so needy," she purred.

you whined at her words, arms failing to hold you up, you collapsed, fingers still pulling but mouth directly on wandas ear. she could hear every pant, soft moan, everything.

she was listening to you, lifting her thigh after a few moments. what she wasnt expecting, was a whiny moan.

"oh! mommy thank you, thats better," you thanked. wandas hand stopped, she tensed, but somehow you weren't dying of embarrassment. quite honestly, neither was wanda.

"of course, mommy would do anything for her baby," wanda replied, relaxing as you relentlessly bucked your hips until the bed was creaking softly.

"mommy, 'm gonna cum," you pleaded. wanda nodded, kissing your face softly and helping you out.

your body jerked softly when you came, hips stilling but wanda helped you ride it out. she gave you multiple praises, kissing behind your ear before slipping you out of your clothes and then out of her own.

you fell asleep peacefully, wanda and you not waking up until about two that afternoon.

[scurvgirl]

The Milkovich house is a disaster. Actually, disaster is an understatement. Ian always knew how the Milkoviches lived, shit he'd lived that that too for a bit. But it hits different when you're one of two people now tasked with sorting through everything.

Most of it is trash. Some of it, though, is meaningful. An even smaller portion of it is pure treasure.

Ian pulls out a picture, clearly taken years and years ago. It shows two young children, more like toddlers really, dressed up in matching costumes. A Mickey and Minnie Mouse.

"Holy shit," Ian breathes as he stares at the picture. He knows it's his husband but he has to be sure. He flips the picture over and in neat, blue ink reads "Mickey and Mandy, Halloween 1997". He can barely process it. Little Mickey. Little Mickey dressed as Mickey Mouse. He flips the picture over again to stare at how adorable his best friend and husband were when they were little. Mickey is smiling in the photo, a big open mouthed smile, maybe even mid laugh. Adorable. Precious.

"Hey, whatcha got there?" Mickey's voice cuts through Ian's thoughts. Oh no, Mickey shouldn't see this. But also....

"Just a picture of you and Mandy." He tries to deflect, but Mickey's quick. He darts to Ian's side and snags a peak of the picture before Ian can hide it.

He expects curses, eye rolls, maybe a hand to snatch it from Ian. What he did not expect is how Mickey goes still then looks away.

"Throw it away."

"Mick-

"Throw it away! My...my mom took that. Before she...look, just throw that shit away." Mickey picks up a beyond-repair shirt and stuffs it into a 'throw away' trash bag. He stomps off into the house, leaving Ian alone with the picture.

He looks down at little smiling Mickey and Mandy. He can't throw this away, he can't just toss whatever evidence that some parts of Mickey's childhood weren't all bad. He tucks the picture into his coat and continues to sort through the mess.

__

Much, much later, they're home. They shower together for quickness and it really is quick (okay, there is some groping) before falling into bed together. Fuck clothes, they're married and at this point, everyone in the house has seen them.

Ian turns to Mickey and tentatively places his hand over his husband's. Mickey accepts it, a finger worries at Ian's wedding band.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

"Shit, Ian, when do I ever want to talk about it?"

There's a long pause before Mickey presses his free hand to his eyes. "I dunno, man, it's just...I'm a fucking orphan. Terry was fucked up and terrible and I wanted to kill him, should have killed him, but he was...fuck. I dunno. I dunno all this feeling shit is just fucked."

Ian doesn't respond verbally right away, instead he scoots over and gently coaxes Mickey into his arms. Mickey allows it, his head coming to rest on Ian's pec while Ian holds his hand.

"I fucking hate him. He taught me how to shoot, how to hotwire a car. I hate him and he's gone. He...he hurt you."

"This isn't about me," Ian whispers, giving Mickey a squeeze.

"It is cuz I'd be...I'd be in jail right now because I'd have killed that stupid fucking nun by now if it wasn't because of your stupid ginger ass."

Ian pauses, listens to Mickey's breath hitch, feels wetness not from their shower on his chest.

"Do you want to kill her?" Ian asks softly after a while.

"No."

Oh so gently, Ian cups Mickey's jaw and tilts his reddened, tear streaked face up.

"I'm sorry you're hurting, baby, and I am not sorry he's gone. He hurt you and he can't do that anymore." Ian presses a kiss to Mickey's forehead.

Mickey doesn't say much more, either from exhaustion or not wanting to talk about it anymore. Either way, Ian holds him and he doesn't pull away.

"That picture you found was the best day of my life before you. Mom dressed Mandy and I up, we went trick'or'treating, ate so much fucking candy. Then she had to fucking die." Mickey sniffles and Ian holds him closer.

"So stupid, dressed up as that damn mouse."

"You were cute," Ian cuts in because he can't help himself, "you're still cute."

"Sap." Mickey pushes Ian without any real force, making them both smile.

"Yeah, I...have a confession, Mick."

"Fuck, what?"

"I didn't throw the pic away."

Mickey doesn't respond right away, just runs a finger along Ian's chest, fidgeting with some of his chest hair.

"Good."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah."

__

They're back at the house the next day. More trash. More hateful messages and books and shit that Ian would like to forget.

In the end, it's Mickey who finds it. He walks out of one of the smaller bedrooms holding a short, black book. He's staring at it like it's some foreign object or a bomb about to go off. Ian is by his side in a moment.

The book's label is written in that same neat script as the picture - "Mickey and Mandy Growing Up".

"It's a photo album," Ian whispers.

"Yep." Mickey's eyes don't move away from it. His body is still.

Ian places a hand on Mickey's shoulder, "You don't have to open it here, or even today or tomorrow. Let's pack it and when you're ready, we can look at it. Together." Finally Mickey moves. He nods his head and gives the album to Ian.

"Keep it with the picture."

Ian takes the album then leans forward to press a kiss to his brave, emotional, incredible husband. His husband who has the chance to be as happy as the little boy in the picture.

[little-miss-dilf-lover]

home is where the heart is

PAIRING: soft!Tangerine x fem!Reader

WORD COUNT: 2.8k

SUMMARY: you and Tan have a free day, deciding that you want to spend the cold day together at home doing cozy and domestic activities.

TAGS/WARNINGS: tooth rotting fluff, pet names, swearing, established relationship, just cute domestic stuff. no mentions of ‘y/n’

A/N: unfortunately there’s no smut in this one, booo- I know I know. but I am planning another story that’s got lots of angst and a tonnes of dirty smut. I wanted to create a quick little cute story, that can be for everyone. it felt really weird to write something that had no smut, and just all fluff- so that was a challenge, plus ive been in a bit of a writing slump since my last post got deleted (yes im still pissed about it lmao) I was in a rush to post this, bc during xmas time I didn’t have much time to write this plus it’s 2023 (wtf?) also hope you enjoyed the holidays & happy new year💌 feedback is always appreciated. hope you like:)

masterlist + rules

taglist

Frosty mornings like these were your favourite, waking up in his warm arms; the comfort and safety it brought you was something that could never quite be topped. Most mornings he’d ‘accidentally’ awaken you by playing with your hair, stroking your shoulders or tracing over your features. Today was no different.

Sometimes he’d wake up an hour before you, and he would become so impatient that he’d have to physically stop himself from opening your eyes.

Today he opted for a different route, growing restless; waking you up by planting kisses all over your face.

“Finally” he rasps as he sees your eyes slowly open “mornin'”

“Good morning” you sluggishly reply, still half asleep.

Noticing the sleep dust in your eyes, he swipes his thumbs in the corners of your eyes, softly removing the sleep crusties. “You look so pretty in the morning”

Shying your face away into the pillow “shut up” you muffle into the fabric before loudly groaning while you stretched in a starfish.

“Come back” readjusting you, so that your head rested on his chest- embracing you tight to him.

You adored the quality time you two shared, you could sit in comfortable silence for hours- just quietly enjoying each other's presence.

“What you fancy doin' today?” He asks, interrupting the ten-minute-long silent cuddle. Taking your hand, placing his against yours above the covers.

“We got the whole day together right? I kinda wanna have a chill quiet day in”

“Good, me too”

“Okay good good- alright let me go now, I’m gonna piss myself” you say, trying to push yourself away.

“No, five more minutes” he whines, pulling you back in.

“I am ten seconds away from wetting the bed”

“Just do it in my mouth” he jests.

His response caught you off guard making you guffaw, followed by a loud gasp.

“Don’t- that’s not funny” now ripping yourself from his embrace, speed walking into the bathroom.

“Babe? I’ll go feed the cat, I’ll be downstairs.” Tangerine shouts from the other side of the door.

Last year you and Tan rescued a ginger cat from a shelter; he was very reluctant on getting a cat- in fact, he hated the idea, instantly shutting it down. You begged him for months and months until one day when he finally caved.

You thought that the cat would be your own pet, considering how much Tangerine was against it- but that was not the case; he and the cat were practically inseparable. He even chose her name before you could get a chance- naming her Mandarine (Mandy for short)

You were feeling a bit sweaty and grimy from last night’s dirty escapades, deciding to quickly hop in the shower.

Drying off and putting on some comfy loungewear, before briskly walking down the grand staircase.

“Something burning?” you shout out, once making your way to the bottom of the stairs.

Walking into the kitchen, stopping in your tracks looking around the room as if a bomb had just gone off in there.

“I know I know, it’s a shithole” he admits, resting against the worktop looking defeated. “I tried making you breakfast”

“You did? That’s so sweet”

“When I say breakfast I mean a pile of shite, you might get ill if you eat it” he says looking almost embarrassed, sliding the plate behind him- hiding it from you.

“I want to eat what you made” you sweetly coo, trying to make him feel a bit better. “You took time and effort, so I’d like to try it”

Reluctantly he pulls out the plate, sliding it along the counter towards you, looking away.

You tried so so hard to show a poker face because you knew that it would crush him if you turned your nose up at it. It looked revolting- just straight-up foul, but he could never know that.

Taking a fork from the draw, and walking yourself over to the island chair to take a seat. You were trying to decide what would be the least disgusting thing to eat. The almost raw scrambled eggs? The charcoal-coloured toast? Or was it the burnt baked beans?

Begrudgingly you slide your fork into the beans, scooping a mouthful and taking a bite. In your mind this was you showing him how much you loved him.

“No stop, I can’t let you eat that. I don’t want you to get sick.” He announces abruptly, pulling the plate away from you.

“It’s okay, I wanna eat what you made” sneaking your fork onto the plate again, taking another bite of the beans- once again proving some kind of bizarre loyalty.

“What you doing you knob?! Don’t eat it. I will go and get something from the shop” he blurts “anyway I used up everything in the fridge making this shit.”

“Thank you for making it, I really do appreciate it” you reassure him. “You go to the shop, and I’ll clean up this pigsty, okay?”

He jogs upstairs to change. You look around the room trying to decide where to start.

Clattering comes rushing down the stairs “alright my love, I’m off.”

Walking up to you, kissing you on the forehead “I love you, be right back”

Smiling back at him, “I love you, be safe” waving him off.

With the door closing you spin on your heel in an attempt to clean.

Putting on some music to help get you in an energised mood.

You couldn’t help but feel something was off with Tangerine, usually, he’s a pretty good cook- quite organised too. But with the state left in the kitchen, you wondered if something was on his mind.

~

Being so occupied with the music and cleaning you had no idea that Tan had been watching you for the last couple of minutes- too busy dancing and singing along to your favourite songs.

A couple light taps on your shoulder snap you out of your trance, instantly frightening you. “AH-ohmygod don’t do that” you shriek, turning the music right down- almost muted.

Chuckling to himself “sorry sorry” pulling his hands from behind his back, handing you the most beautiful bouquet of flowers “sorry I took so long, I stopped by the florists”

“These are stunning! Thank you” you respond full of joy.

“Always welcome. I’ll put these in a vase for you. Put your feet up… and thank you for cleaning my mess”

“Of course! And no it’s okay, I’ll put the shopping away”

“Wait, before you do that, get my phone… in my pocket” noticing you look around in a confused way. “My hands are wet, my phone in my pocket.. my joggers- the ones I’m wearing.” He knew that sometimes you could be a bit slow, so he made sure to never lose his temper with you.

“Oooh” cackling to yourself. Reaching your hands into his pocket, pulling out his phone.

“Okay good, unlock it… now go on photos”

Looking up at him slightly befuddled “are you sure? It’s your phone, I don’t wanna snoop”

“Yes- do it” looking down at you to see your reaction. “I know you love the sky… the sunrise looked beautiful this morning and thought you’d like a picture of it” focusing on you, trying to figure out what you were thinking.

“Why are you so thoughtful? I’m gonna send these to myself. It’s so pretty, thank you handsome” giving him a quick couple of pecks on the lips.

“Oooo wait- what’s this?” Finding a picture of him on a mission, showing him the selfie on his phone- mouth agape “looking good my friend, Jesus Christ you’re so pretty… I’m sending this to myself too”

Both beaming at each other. “These look good, right?” He asks, placing the vase on the accent table in the hallway, and adjusting them a couple times.

“They’re beautiful” smiling at him, from behind the fridge door. “Babe? Why so many eggs?” You ask.

“You talk about how much you want to bake again, I thought we could do that today” strolling over to you, standing behind you, and wrapping his arms around your waist. Resting your head back on his chest. “You are too cute sometimes, ya know that?”

Kissing you on the cheek, walking away to put the kettle on “fancy a cuppa?”

“Ooh yes please” you reply, closing the fridge and putting away the bags.

“Is that-?” Tan asks himself, walking over to your phone “it is” turning it up a bit. “It’s our song” it was live forever by Oasis.

Taking your hand, slowly swaying with you around the kitchen. You pick up Mandy, noticing that she wants if be included, holding her between you both as you step around the table. Smiling at each other, like a cute little family.

Once the song finishes you place the cat down on her favourite spot on the windowsill. Making your teas, taking a few sips.

“What do you wanna make?” You ask while looking through the cupboards.

“I’m partial to those blueberry muffins you make” he instantly responds, almost as if they were already on his mind.

“Ooh they do sound good right now actually”

Working together as a team, doing things as though your minds are connected- as if you both know what the other needs before they even know it.

Once everything had been washed up, you both waited impatiently for the timer to go off. You were sat on the counter and Tan was standing between your legs with his back to you, hugging around him, resting your face against his muscular back.

“Oh hurry up you stupid oven” you say out loud to yourself.

You could feel your face bob up a couple times from the vibrations of his chuckle

*ding*

Tan opens the door, pulling out the tray of muffins with the tea cloth, placing them on a heat pad. You rush over snatching one, raising it to take a bite. He cups his hand under your mouth because he knew what was about to happen next.

“Ashahsahash” you muffle, steam exiting your mouth, letting the piece of muffin fall into his hand.

“Hot?” He jokes, smirking at you.

“Yup”

Instead of throwing your bite away or putting it aside, he eats it straight from his hand. You hated to admit it, but that was so hot. Your eyes widened, looking away smirking.

“Go put sommat on the telly, I’ll be in there in a min- before you go, take in the drinks would ya?” he sweetly instructs.

You set the sofa with a few fluffy blankets, closing the curtains. Lighting some candles before flopping onto the sofa.

He follows not long after with a tray of goodies. The muffins, a bowl of pretzels and couple bags of chocolate. A few small oranges on the board to add some balance. He even decorated the tray with a flower in an empty beer bottle.

Setting it down on the coffee table. Plopping himself down next to you- adjusting the pair of you so that he was sitting in the corner of the sofa, allowing you to lounge into him.

Covering yourselves with the blankets. “What do you fancy watching?” He questions while picking up the controller.

In sync, you both suggest “Gavin and Stacey?” Which was followed by a laugh from you both.

With his arm draped over your shoulder, he lifted your jaw up so that he could give you a couple sweet deep kisses. Snuggling into him as the tv plays, Mandy joins- laying soundly on Tan’s lap.

~

After a few hours had passed, you wanted to get up to have a quick stretch and pee break. By this point, you were half laid on his chest and half falling down the back of the sofa. “Okay I gotta get up, my back is killing” you announce.

“Me too, I’ve been needing a piss the whole episode.”

“Quick break and rejoin in five?” You ask.

“Naa make it ten, I need a cig”

“Sorry, Mandy baby, mummy’s gotta get up” you softly say to the orange ball of fluff sleeping on the dip in your waist.

“Awh she’s so mean Mands, aww you poor thing, come to daddy” he jokes while picking her up, smirking at you because he loves winding you up.

“Evil” you respond to him shortly.

After your short break, gathering back together on the couch. This time his head rested on your shoulder as he cuddled into you, running your fingers through the length of his hair. Laying together in peaceful silence.

His phone rang obnoxiously, interrupting the quiet. “Hello? What?!” He snaps to the person on the receiver. Tan’s tone was always different around other people, he spoke to you in a gentle, caring, and loving way- he wouldn’t dare speak to you the way he does to others.

“Alright keep your fucking knickers on” he groans into the phone. “I’ll be right back love” he whispers to you, kissing your forehead before leaving the room.

Even though the door was closed you could still hear what he was saying, it muffled throughout the walls, but you didn’t want to eavesdrop.

“No! I ain’t fucking doing it. Find someone else”

Your eyebrows screwed together in confusion. “What was he on about?” you thought to yourself.

He re-enters the room, and you pretend that you weren’t listening to his call.

Slumping down next to you, looking irritated.

Turning round to look at him, you were concerned “you doing okay?” You question.

“Yeah. What you wanna watch now?” He asks, changing the subject.

“Hey? You can talk to me.”

“I don’t wanna bother you.”

“You could never” you reassure.

Huffing out a long breath before professing what was on his mind. “This Russian nut job wants me and Lem to collect his son and some ransom money in Tokyo. He’s been hounding us for days. I don’t want to do it- he knows about the Bolivia job and personally wants to hire us. But that man- he’s fucked in the head. I don’t want to get caught up in that shit.”

“Would it be selfish for me to say that I’m glad you don’t want to take it?” you admit. “I just want you safe. Why don’t you invite Lem over? You can talk it over in your office, I can make us all some dinner and maybe we can play some card games by the fireplace or watch some tv? He can stay over and hopefully it will help get your mind off it all?”

“Okay… we’ll try that. I’ll ring him now” holding your face, bringing it close to his- giving you a couple long kisses before leaving the room- going upstairs.

You hurry to the kitchen, looking through the fridge to see what to make for this impromptu dinner evening. Deciding on creamy chicken pasta with steamed veg.

Tangerine joins you a few minutes later, helping you cook the food. “He won’t be long, he’s already in the area”

“Good good, is his stuff up in his room? Or in the laundry?” You ask, wanting to make sure Lemon feels welcome when he arrives. A couple years ago you both turned a spare room into his room so that whenever he visits (more often than not) he’d feel comfortable and at home.

“His room” he replies like he’s trying to remember.

A couple echoing knocks come from the wooden door, and Tan rushes to it- unlocking it. A booming voice follows with footsteps towards the kitchen.

“Lem! Hi, welcome welcome. Hope you’re hungry” you gush, walking around the island to give him a hug.

“It smells fucking banging in here” he compliments.

“Thank you. Your stuff is upstairs on your bed, it should be clean and folded”

“Ah you are a gem”

“Dinner is almost done, babe you do drinks, Lem you do cutlery and I’ll serve” you instruct.

“You’re the boss” Tangerine says, saluting you.

Walking to into the living room, handing them their bowls, before taking a seat on the sofa between the brothers.

“What we watching?” Lemon asks before taking a bite. “Woah that’s fucking good,” he says with a mouthful.

“Thank you”

“Before you ask Lem, we ain’t watching fucking Thomas” Tangerine pipes up.

“What about Gavin and Stacey?” Lem questions.

Your neck whips round to face Tan, both bursting into laughter.

“What? Did I spit on you or something?” He asks sounding a bit embarrassed.

“No no! Just we’ve been watching that all day” you comfort.

“Yeah, I can watch it again” Tangerine chirps in.

For the rest of the night, the three of you plus Mandy lounged around. Watching tv and playing board games until it was time to sleep.

All of you getting ready for the night, saying goodnight to Lemon before heading to bed.

Snuggling into Tan under the duvet, using him as a hot water bottle.

“Thank you for taking my mind off everything today my sweet” he softly hushes. 

“Anytime my love” you soothe.

“I’m fucking knackered. Goodnight Clementine, I love you” he whispers, turning around to tightly spoon you.

[thedivinershiddenarchive]

anon asked... if its okay, can i request red riding hood!reader/wolf!childe as a thirst? have a nice day~~~

cw. fem!red riding hood!reader x hybrid wolf!childe;tartaglia, dvb-c0n, b1t1ng and mark1ng, some blood, unprotected s3x, cr3ampi3s, m4ting

a/n. omg this concept??? i love that sm anon i shall kiss u for this [ogs will know this is a repost]

masterlist | tag system | 17- & MASC-ALIGNED PLEASE DNI! THIS IS ONLY FOR FEMALE AUDIENCES.

BY PROCEEDING WITH THIS POST, YOU HAVE READ THE WARNINGS STATED ABOVE AND CONSENT TO VIEW AND CONSUME THE CONTENT.

Wolf!Childe wouldn't just be stalking you because you had food, more like you were the food that he's been wanting to eat since the day you entered the forest to visit someone.

The ginger was too scared to meet up with you but his impatience got the best of him as he quickly pounced on you the moment you entered the forest's route. The horror in your eyes was evident but once they met his big blue irises, you became completely calm.

The joy in his face was obvious when it looked like you weren't scared of him, you had to admit, he looked more like a bouncy fox than a horrific wolf. Your meeting with your friend would delay a lot because he wanted to guide you to different places you haven't seen in the forest.

Now Childe is guiding you to a more 'private' place that you haven't seen before. He calls it his cave. he says that it wasn't much but it could do.

Last thing you expected was being pinned to the nearest wall with his hands clawing your dress away as you gripped onto his body while you squirmed in his hold. You let out whimpers when you were bare before him, licking his lips before piercing his canine teeth into the skin of your neck, making you squeal in discomfort. Feeling the tinge of pain from under your jaw.

Your cute whines made it unbearable to have you right there and now. To be honest, what's stopping him? Exactly, nothing. He assures you it would feel really good and it would only hurt a bit if you persisted.

And you believed him. Oh it was so cute seeing you this naive, it makes the blood rush to his cock faster. Childe grabs an apple from the basket on the floor as he uses it to gag your mouth to prevent you from making noises even if he was gonna be the one making all the moaning.

Both of you were so sensitive, he would've kissed you to shut you up but his mouth was busy ravaging your neck, collarbone, and breasts. Busy marking you as his in the most obvious spots that the villagers would notice it.

You were practically stained with his saliva. Childe would make sure to clean you up after he's done with you. The ginger was hugging your waist so tightly, letting out pitched moans as his claws dug into your hair and grunted with each roll of his hips inside of your cunt. He talks about how good of a girl you are for him as he pounded into you harshly.

He acted like a dog in heat, which would be accurate except he wasn't a dog. His tail was wagging so fast it was blowing wind towards the two of you, his ears were twitching, signifying his release.

Childe was sending long ropes of his cum inside of you. You were left struggling still, popping the apple out of your mouth as saliva dripped down the corners of it. You were about to say something but get cut off by him smashing his lips into yours, inserting his tongue quickly as you groaned into the ginger's mouth.

The wolf only smirked as he continued swirling his tongue with yours, his hands wandering from your boobs to your cunt, playing with it as you let out a sob when you reached your orgasm. You look so fucking adorable when you come, lovely girl... What about you do that for me again?

You shook your head, saying how one round is enough but he wanted more. Giving you big puppy eyes, guilt tripping you into giving him more than he deserves. Now you can't help it when he forces your hands to cup his face and bringing his forehead to your lips as he whines in wanting it to further escalate.

Now you give in, letting him get what he wants. Maybe your visit can be delayed for a little longer. You just hope it's worth your time.

© notsodivininglover 2023. reposting, plagiarizing, translating or claiming my works are strictly forbiddened.

[babydollmarauders]

MEDIA MANAGEMENT — JACK HUGHES (23-24 SZN PART 6)

au masterlist

y/ndevils00

liked by jackhughes, dougieham, and 237,029 others

y/ndevils00 HAPPY REGULAR SEASON!!!

WELCOME BACK TO THE SPECIAL EDITION: JACK HUGHES SHOW!

OUR MIGHTY FINE DEVILS WON 4-3 AGAINST THE MICHIGAN BIRDS!

tonight, my beloved, apparent bad boy, got TWO goals, but more importantly TWO penalties!! i love when he does good things, but i love when he does bad things even more!! even if the first penalty WAS a bit of a chintzy call, i still loved seeing him locked up 🥰

my favorite autumn tree got his first goal of the season tonight, and i couldn’t be prouder! you go, ginger snap!

my sweet bratt also got a penalty for interference, which makes no sense to me, and obviously not to him either- but alas, we persevered!

and last, but certainly not least, UNCLE HAULA-HOOP GOT AN EMPTY NET GOAL, WHICH SECURED OUR WIN!! THANK YOU, HAULA BACK GAL!

p.s. i’m sorry to Ellen, who i accidentally ditched to get a picture of her son in the bad boy box, and who also might’ve heard me call him a naughty slut— she laughed, but i think i saw a part of her die inside

tagged jackhughes, dougieham, jesperbratt, and ehaula

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jackhughes did you seriously post a photo of me COMMITTING MY PENALTY?

y/ndevils00 you chose violence. i love it. 👁️🫦👁️

trevorzegras hey those emojis look exactly like you

y/ndevils00 @/trevorzegras I WAS HAVING A GOOD NIGHT AND THEN YOU SHOWED UP

dougieham autumn tree?

dougieham wait, hold on, i got this….

dougieham trees are tall and their leaves turn red and orange in autumn. i am tall and a ginger (red/orange)! therefore, me = autumn tree

y/ndevils00 YOU DID IT!! 🥹 i think i’m even prouder now than for your goal!

john.marino97 no me? no dawson?

dawson1417 yeah, no us?

y/ndevils00 @/dawson1417 i have two words, eight letters.

dawson1417 “love y’all” ?

john.marino97 forgive him, he’s new to this

y/ndevils00 @/dawson1417 DO BETTER

dawson1417 oh :( but you DO love us, right?

y/ndevils00 @/dawson1417 duh, obviously

user26 DEVILS ARE SO BACK

jesperbratt i didn’t do anything 🙁

y/ndevils00 i know you didn’t, my little swedish meatball! I’LL FIX THIS!

jackhughes no you won’t

y/ndevils00 no i won’t :(

ehaula i’ve missed you, niece!! and unfortunately your puns too

y/ndevils00 IT WAS ONLY A MATTER OF TIME!! MWAHAHAHA

ehaula was that your evil laugh?

y/ndevils00 yeh

ehaula it was adorable

y/ndevils00 😠

ehaula @/kristen.haula isn’t she cute?!

kristen.haula our niece 🥹

user83 I WANNA BE HIS MOUTHGUARD

y/ndevils00 me first!

jackhughes why

elblue6 i promise, i didn’t die inside! call him a slut all you want!

jackhughes MOM?

y/ndevils00 you are my only true supporter, Ellen 🫶

nicohischier you didn’t call me any names! i used to pray for times like these

y/ndevils00 only because i didn’t get a picture fast enough of you bent over like me in the bedroom

jackhughes why do you say these things

nicohischier please stop talking

y/ndevils00 never. 🗣️ SLUT 🗣️

lhughes_06 i made it out unscathed 🙏

y/ndevils00 you wish

lhughes_06 wait, what?

y/ndevils00

liked by john.marino97, lhughes_06, and 234,641 others

y/ndevils00 i was so happy to meet so many of your wonderful faces on the red carpet!

i was just there to do my job (taking pictures of my boyfriend! god i love my job!) but so many of you asked for pictures with ME and it made my heart feel so full!

i never thought that accepting this job would mean finding a boyfriend, a brother (two! actually!), two amazing best friends, and apparently a family of supporters! i’m so grateful to have the opportunity to make a lifetime of memories with this amazing team!

go devils! but most importantly, go devils fans! this wouldn’t be possible without y’all!

tagged jackhughes, john.marino97, lhughes_06, and dawson1417

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user19 i’m gonna go out on a limb and assume you’re the one to thank for Jack’s new hair, in which case THANK YOU 🙏🫶

y/ndevils00 you’d be correct 😈 YOU’RE SO WELCOME

jackhughes ya know, I’M the one who went and got my haircut

y/ndevils00 yeah, after i played subliminal messages in your ears at night, telling you that you should go and get it cut

jackhughes you what?

y/ndevils00 you look so handsome, babygirl!

lhughes_06 my squishy!

y/ndevils00 MY SMUSH!

lhughes_06 you looked radiant tonight

y/ndevils00 aww, well you looked quite dashing, yourself!

lhughes_06 my sister ❤️

jackhughes she’s in the closet

trevorzegras she came out?

y/ndevils00 @/trevorzegras I’M CRYING, YOU IDIOT! i’m in the physical closet, not the metaphorical one!

trevorzegras oh! my b, bro

dawson1417 THAT’S ME!

y/ndevils00 that’s you!!

dawson1417 i’m also grateful you have this opportunity and that you took this job btw

y/ndevils00 THIS POST WAS NEVER MEANT TO MAKE *ME* CRY

dawson1417 please don’t cry, i’ll bring you a churro tomorrow?

y/ndevils00 suddenly my tears are gone

jackhughes no they’re not

dawson1417 @/jackhughes i’ll bring her a churro anyways

user73 I MET YOU!!! you’re so sweet, and gorgeous! i think i was even more excited to meet you than Jack!

y/ndevils00 ME? LOOK AT YOU, BEAUTIFUL GIRL!

jackhughes i feel like i should feel offended, but somehow i’m not because i’d be excited to meet dove too

y/ndevils00 @/jackhughes you’re so obsessed with me

user39 JOHN PICS 🧎‍♀️🧎‍♀️ THANK YOU, Y/N!!

jackhughes my beautiful, crazy girl ♥️ i’m thankful everyday that you accepted this job and that you accepted the title of my girlfriend

y/ndevils00 aw, i love you to pluto, my sweet boy ♥️

y/ndevils00 p.s. if you’re so thankful, you should think about changing my title 🥰

jackhughes moments over

y/ndevils00 I’M JUST SAYING

_quinnhughes you didn’t hear it from me…. but he’s definitely thought about changing it

y/ndevils00 @_quinnhughes you’re my new favorite hughes

_quinnhughes i wasn’t already?

y/ndevils00 well, you were, and then luke bought me pizza

_quinnhughes pizza? PIZZA is all it takes?!

y/ndevils00 please captain huggy, have mercy on me, i was starving and your middle brother was trying to feed me chicken that wasn’t tenders or nuggets

john.marino97 grateful for you and the way you push me to d* b*tter ❤️

y/ndevils00 did you just censor “do better” ?

john.marino97 it’s given me ptdbs

y/ndevils00 ?

y/ndevils00 wait— “post traumatic do better syndrome”

y/ndevils00 i’m so smart 🥰

john.marino97 yes, you are! such a smart girl!

y/ndevils00 that feels like sarcasm but i’m gonna ignore it

[wardenparker]

Down the Rabbit Hole - ch 1

Jack ‘Whiskey’ Daniels x female reader Co-written with @absurdthirst​

When Jack accidentally shoots a civilian on a mission he takes on not only the guilt of the man’s death, but inherits his soulmate as well. To you, it’s a dream job with more perks than you can imagine - but for Jack it’s a nightmarish complication. Even more so when he starts to develop feelings.  

Rating: Mature Word Count: 6.6k Warnings: *Blanket warnings - mentions of deceased spouse, a lot of food and alcohol consumption, family recipes, age gap, cursing.* Canon typical violence, death, gun use, angst. Jack has a temper and Tequila has a dumb first name.  Summary: A mission gone wrong ends with disastrous consequences for Jack, but Champ has a plan. A plan to change your life forever. Notes: Welcome to soulmate story number six, everyone! I’m so, so excited to dive in here because I adore Jack. Keri and I are moving ahead with full steam on this story and we can’t wait to see what you all think of it!

Ch 1 ~ Ch 2 ~ Ch 3 ~ Ch 4 ~ Ch 5 ~ Ch 6 ~ Ch 7 ~ Ch 8 ~ Ch 9 ~ Ch 10 ~ Ch 11 ~ Ch 12 ~ Ch 13 ~ Ch 14 ~ Ch 15 ~ Epilogue

Statesman, the independent intelligence agency, probably has some of the most up-to-date intel that anyone could ever want. Most times. Right now, that isn't the case. Ducking down behind a flipped over table, Jack – Agent Whiskey – rips off the broken frames of the glasses that not only fed him information but also scanned anyone for weapons and allowed his oversight team to see what he was seeing. A little bit of 'through the looking glass' magic.

"Now, damnit Ginger, I'm not trying to be difficult, but I need to know how the fuck to get out of here." Jack growls into the minuscule microphone that is imbedded into the earpiece that allowed her to talk directly into his ear. He glances at a body that is laying nearby, limbs sprawled with his eyes open and lifeless. The target that he had been after but someone else had started shooting up the place before he could reach him.

“You’ve been made, Whiskey, you need to get out of there.” It might be a little bit of stating the obvious, but Ginger’s even tone comes through his ear piece loud and clear. “What’s your clearest exit?”

"Does it look like I know?" Jack huffs, rolling his eyes even though the Statesman tech couldn't see him as he takes a chance and sticks his head up to scan the area for the nearest exit. The rapid burst of gunfire makes him duck back down, wood from the table splintering above his Stetson. "Southeast corner."

“Get out through the kitchen.” Ginger orders, clicking through floor plans and security cameras at her desk at lightning speed. “Through the kitchen, out the delivery bay doors, and left when you hit the alley. That will put you in the parking lot. Grab a car and get to the hell back to the Silver Pony.” The end of this mission has gotten messier than Champ will like, and extraction is their best option until a new strategy can be decided on. It’s ugly, but it happens sometimes. That’s one of the hazards of their line of work.

"Copy." Jack hunches down a little more when another barge of gunfire erupts, this time he feels the tug of a bullet as it tears through the wood and punches a hole through his hat. "Didn't think y'all'd give me a second." He grumbles, reaching for the pair of pearl handled .44 revolvers that are tucked into his holsters. Flipping them easily by the trigger guards as more of a habit than anything else, the weight of them is familiar and steady in his hands.

"Gonna hit the sprinklers and fire alarms in five seconds, Jack." The warning is the best Ginger can do for him, knowing that the ensuing chaos will confuse and disorient the enemies shooting at Jack and give him just a few seconds to get across the room while they adjust to something new happening around them. "Five...four...three...two...one!"

The distraction is just the window that he needs. Springing out from behind the compromised cover to start shooting. Jack's aim is true, taking down two of the people shooting at him with quick pulls of the triggers under his fingers. Three pounds of pressure to pull the hammer back and fire, custom designed for him for better rate of fire in a pinch. Those targets down, Jack starts to dash through the spraying water, the alarms starting to blare out to warn of a fire that isn't there but the system thinks it is.

The double doors into the hotel kitchen slam open, expelling Jack into the crowded, overheated room full of clamoring cooks getting ready for dinner service. A radio blaring in one corner and more than a dozen people shouting to each other had covered most of the noise of gunshots, but there's no mistaking their surprise when the mustachioed cowboy falls through the doors into their domain.

Jack’s eyes are darting around the room, seeking out a potential threat and when he doesn’t find one, he starts running for the door on the opposite side of the long galley.

Most people jump out of the way, some brandishing the knives in their hands as defensive weapons and others hide behind prep tables. The blaring alarm has now made its way to the kitchen, and everyone not cowering or weakly defending themselves is now trying to cover the food they have been cooking from being destroyed by the water splashing down from the ceiling. There is shouting and chaos, but no one dares to stop the cowboy running at full speed down the length of the kitchen.

“Ginger!” Jack shouts, even though he doesn’t have to as he pushes out of the doors that lead to the dock and loading bay. “Where to—” His words break off as he sees the glint of a gun out of the corner of his eye, reacting without even hesitating. Twirling around and his weapons fire on instinct.

"Jack?" Ginger's voice echoes in his ear as the man whirls around to see two bodies drop to the pavement behind him. One had a gun outstretched, the crisp lines of his suit wrinkled under the force of the shot that sent him falling backward. The other pitched into the wall before he fell – chef's jacket stained crimson with his own blood. "Jack! Are you hit?" She asks, voice more determined and edging on nervous.

Jack’s blood rushes to his ears, making Ginger sound like she is underwater. Or maybe it’s him that is drowning. It’s suddenly hard to breath, the seeming sucked from his lungs as he sways on his feet for a heart stopping moment. The impact of what he has just done crashing over him.

“Jack? Jack!” Ginger’s voice in his ear makes his vision sharpen from where it had gone fuzzy, bringing him back to the moment.

“Ginger Ale.” Jack chokes out. “I—shit, I just shot a civilian.”

"Shit." For a woman who rarely ever curses, the impact of it doubles coming from Ginger. "Get out of there, Jack. I'll send in Gamma Team to clean up. But I don't want you being part of the cleanup. You hear me?"

A civilian. Shit. Champ is going to be furious.

******

“Jason Howe, 36, born in Northwood, New Hampshire on April 4th.”

Jack winces and curls his hand into a fist as he stands in front of the conference room table. Not having been invited to sit, nor to have the glass of ‘67 Statesman Reserve that Champ has sitting in a glass at his elbow. A drink that Jack desperately needs. “Champ, there was a gun.” Jack defends, although he knows it’s a weak excuse. Statesmen take out the bad guys, not hurt the innocent. And Jack’s killed a bystander who had nothing to do with anything.

"You've been off since Cambodia, Jack." And although Champ knows exactly why, it can't be considered an excuse. He looks back down at the file on the conference table and frowns, then keeps reading. "Two siblings. Parents both living. Soulmate so far unknown." The older man looks up, locking his eyes on Jack. "We're tracking her down."

“Why?” Jack demands, frowning at the mere idea. Statesman had never tracked down a soulmate of anyone before, why start now? “We don’t know who it is, or if they care.” He scoffs. “Better to let sleepin’ dogs lie.”

“I don’t blame you for not noticing.” Champ sighs and shakes his head before finally motioning for Jack to sit. The man is his best senior agent, his quickest set of reflexes, and his closest friend. Frankly, Champ is worried about the upheaval in Jack’s life lately. It’s affecting his perception on a base level, not to mention his work. “You didn’t come out of that fire fight unscathed, and your adrenaline was too damn high for the pain to get through to you.” Running one hand down his face, Champ huffs slightly as he sips from his own whiskey glass but still doesn’t offer Jack any. “The back of your right arm. Just above your elbow. You have a new mark, Jack.”

“Bullshit.” Jack spits, furious at the implication of what Champ is saying. “My soulmate is dead.” He reminds the older man, as if he wasn’t well aware. Hell, Champ was the one who had recruited Jack to Statesman, so he was well aquatinted with his backstory. Until this moment, he would have called the man a friend. Maybe his best friend, even though Tequila likes to claim that’s his title. “Been dead and gone for years. So there ain’t no marks on my body.”

“I don’t mean to say anything against her memory.” Champ holds up one hand in a defensive posture. With the other, he gestures to the large mirror on the conference room wall. “Roll up your sleeve and take a look for yourself. Ginger noted the appearance of scars from minor cuts and bruises and a small tattoo on your arm. None of these marks were found on the civilian that was killed or any of the other dead men that Gamma Team cleaned from the scene. Following protocols, we’re now tracking down any and all soulmates and searching databases for your exact set of new marks.” He knows it isn’t good news. It isn’t good for the agency, and it isn’t good for Jack. But, despite it being a long shot, it is now more likely than not that someone out there shares these marks with him. And that makes her both a liability and a potential target. Whoever she is.

Fuck.” Jack hisses bitterly, his shoulders jerking as he shuffles out of his sports coat and tosses it down so he can start rolling up his sleeve. “Can’t Ginger remove it?” He demands, not wanting marks on his body. He hasn’t had any since the day Abigail died and he doesn’t want some other woman’s scars or tattoos on his skin either. He doesn’t have a soulmate and he doesn’t want one.

“Soulmate scars don’t work like that.” He knows Jack knows it, but he also understands the younger man’s distress as he tears his sleeve back to inspect his skin. “As far as Ginger’s nanites are concerned, that’s just your skin. No imperfections about it.”

“Who gets a goddamn tattoo on the back of their elbow?” Jack growls, twisting his arm around before he catches sight of the ink. “I don’t want another soulmate. This needs to be broken.” Tattoos and scars were things that could get an agent killed. Identifying marks, things that nanites fixed to conceal their real identities. Even agent’s soulmates had their scars removed if they were together.

“How exactly do you propose to do that?” Champ asks, raising one incredulous eyebrow at his friend. “Soulmate bonds are only broken by death, Jack. You know that as well as anyone. So unless you’re intendin’ on killing this girl just for existing, I’m afraid you’re shit out of luck.”

For one horrifying split second, Jack considers it. In his grief and rage at having his original soulmate, his wife, he thinks about killing another innocent person. “Jesus Christ.” He manages, body sagging and slumping in disgust at himself and overwhelming sadness. “I— I can’t—” Looking helplessly up at Champ, his eyes are filled with pain. “I can’t be someone else’s soulmate.”

“No one’s askin’ you to drop everything and bring whoever this woman is back to the ranch and start your life over.” At this, and Jack’s defeated shoulders, Champ finally pours two fingers of ‘67 Reserve into a clean glass and slides it across the table to Jack. “We’re gonna find her, and she’s gonna be under Statesman protection. That’s how we’re gonna handle this to start out with. Until we know more about her, the best thing we can do for your safety and hers is keep her close.”

“Why the fuck was this Jason Howe outside?” Jack snatched up the glass, pissed that because of one cook’s inability to be in the damn kitchen where he belonged, he’s burdened with a soulmate he doesn’t want. Is he victim blaming and deflecting? Yes, he is. But he doesn’t care right now. The whiskey burns on the way down and Jack sighs in appreciation of that fact.

“Smoke break.” Champ shrugs, knowing that why doesn’t really matter. “Gamma found his DNA on two cigarette butts nearby.”

There’s a sarcastic comment about how smoking kills somewhere rattling around in his brain, but Jack can’t bring himself to voice it. Not when he knows he is to blame, he had reacted and didn’t take a split second to make sure it wasn’t someone innocent nearby. He had done this and it weighs heavily. Nearly as heavy as his wife’s death and he hadn’t been directly responsible for that - though he felt guilty.

Shifting back in his chair, Champ surveys the agent in front of him as an agent rather than his friend, and he drains the rest of his glass in one go. “You have to come out of the field for a while,” he tells Jack firmly. There’s no room for debate here. “Psych eval, incident investigation, and that mark on your arm all have to be addressed before we can get you back out.”

Jack’s jaw rocks, immediately wanting to argue but he knows Champ. There’s no getting around this. He’ll be out of the field until the man gives his stamp of approval and not a moment before. “Had no problem throwing out the Golden Circle but now this is a problem?” He growls, stomping around the table to snatch a bottle of Statesman ‘72 off the bar cart. “Let me know when I gotta talk to the head doctors. Until then, I’m drinkin’.”

“I can’t get you out of this one because I threw my weight around on the Golden Circle case.” Champ huffs, not wanting to cause a fight but ready to have this conversation if need be. “I’m not worried ‘bout you passing, Jack. It’s just gotta get done.” The real concern is the black ink on the back of his arm – a hearts playing card with a teacup where the ace would be and the words ‘Curioser and curioser’ encircling it. While he carries that mark, he’s a danger in the field.

Snorting, Jack turns on his heel, grabbing his jacket off the chair and flicking a mocking two finger salute at Champ. “Sure thing, Champagne,” he huffs, knowing how much the full code name chosen for him irritates him. “I’m on desk duty.”

Champ huffs again, annoyed at Jack for being seemingly even less mature than Tequila in realizing that this isn’t a punishment, it’s caution. “And you’ll stay that way,” he grumbles as the door slams shut behind Whiskey’s retreating figure. “Goddamn stubborn donkey’s ass.”

Jack’s boots slap against the floors as he stomps down the hall. Several agents sidestep and move on the other side, warily eyeing the fierce scowl on his face.

The sound is unmistakable, and Tequila has been waiting to hear it since Jack had reported to Champ a half hour ago. He situated himself in Jack’s office almost immediately after, not really knowing what would happen but figuring that his friend might want to rant about something or go for a drink after. Civilians don’t exactly get caught in the crossfire every day – and Jack takes that kind of thing personally.

The door swings open and Jack pins Tequila with a hard stare. “Get out.” He huffs, striding over to the desk and slamming the bottle down on the hundred year old oak before he turns around to his own wet bar to get a glass.

“Guessin’ Champ ain’t too happy?” Tequila stands from the chair he had been occupying but makes no movement to leave. He’s known Whiskey too long and thinks too well of him to just up and abandon the man.

Jack doesn’t answer, grabbing the cut crystal glass and setting it down a little too forcefully before he picks up the bottle to pull the cork out and pours himself a double.

“Takin’ that as a ‘no, he ain’t’.” Stretching awkwardly, Tequila crosses his arms and watches Jack for a few seconds before he tries again. “There’s a couple of new girls leading tours who’ve been hinting at wanting dates,” he offers, knowing that that usually perks the older agent up a little. “We could blow off some steam tonight?” Mostly he’s just not sure that leaving Jack alone is going to be good in any way.

“Not interested.” Jack grunts, stomach rolling with guilt and anger. “God damnit!” He slams the glass down on the desk and his hand shoots out to sweep the neatly stacked files off the desk to scatter across the floor. Not like he wouldn’t have time to reorganize them anyway.

“Shit, Jack. What the fuck did Champ say?” Whiskey might have a temper, sure, but he usually just blows off his steam at the firing range or with a one-night stand. He’s not the type to go destroying things for fun or catharsis. Tequila steps forward warily, like he’s dealing with a spooked horse instead of his upset friend. “You know you can tell me. We can figure shit out.”

“There’s no ‘figuring it out’, Tex.” Jack snarls, well aware of the fact that Tequila hates his given name and prefers to go by his code name. “Apparently I inherited the civilian’s soulmate.”

“Fuuuck…” Tequila’s jaw drops so hard that his ass ends up back in the chair he has been sitting in only a minute ago. “How the hell does that happen?”

“Fuck if I know.” Jack blows out, reaching up to start unbuttoning his shirt. He needs to examine himself to see what other fucking marks this mystery woman has ‘gifted’ him with.

“Second soulmates are supposed to be a myth…” Anybody who knows a single thing about Jack Daniels knows about Abigail, and the fact that he lost her more than twenty years ago. A bit like anyone who knows him knows he was a rodeo man.

“Second soulmates are lies you tell the poor son of a bitch who’s burying his sweetheart.” Jack spits bitterly, remembering the bullshit people had spouted at him in the name of making him ‘feel better’. It hadn’t worked. “Not needed or wanted.”

“Looks like they ain’t lies at all.” Tequila hunches forward in his seat when Jack peels away his shirt and makes a noncommittal sound at the black-inked image on the back of his arm. “Weird place for it,” he comments, inching closer to get a better look.

“Fucking stupid is what it is.” Had Jack been admiring the tattoo on a woman, one he had in bed or aiming to get into bed, his opinion would have been different. But this was ink on his body. Even the tattoo he had gotten after Abigail and Tim died had to be removed when he joined Statesman.

Tequila squints a second before letting out a half-hearted chuckle. “It’s Alice in Wonderland,” he informs the other man once he remembered what the damn quote was all about. “Guess she likes to read.”

“Champ wants to find this woman.” Jack huffs, rolling his eyes and looking towards the mirror that is attached to the bathroom door. Looking for anything else.

“You don’t?” He probably sounds more surprised than he is, but if it were him - Tequila would sure as hell want to find the woman the universe says he’s supposed to love and cherish for the rest of his life. Even if all he had was a platonic soulmate, he would still want to know them. To have that connection and closeness. A friend that means so much they become his family. “Not sayin’ you hafta marry her, Jack, but damn. I mean…she’s got a target painted on her now if anyone ever finds out. Shouldn’t Statesman keep her safe?”

If it was anyone else, Jack would say that the protection of Statesman was necessary, but he can’t bring himself to say it. He knows that Champ and Tequila are right, this person – whoever she is – deserves to be safe because of who he is. Instead of answering, Jack pours himself another drink.

“Right.” Nodding at Jack’s silence, Tequila adjusts his Stetson and raps his knuckles once on the large oak desk. “I’ll see you in the morning, then?” It’s the end of the day and he’s presuming that Jack will be drinking his supper tonight. Which is a fair bet, all things considered.

There’s defeat in Jack’s stance, unable to gather his thoughts properly. Work was easy, it didn’t involve his heart and this was everything to do with it. When Jack still says nothing, Tequila stands and turns to move towards the door. “What does it say?” Jack asks quietly, staring down at the empty glass and wishing he was already wasted. “That I’ve got marks on my body again? What does it say about my love for my wife?”

“I don’t know what it says about her,” Tequila admits, turning again to face his friend. “But I think it says that you deserve a chance to be happy again. And from everything you’ve ever told me about Abigail?” He shrugs slightly, glancing down at the framed photograph of the two of them that he knows Jack keeps in pristine condition on his desk at all times. “Seems to me she’d be more upset at you closin’ yourself off than at the universe givin’ you an ass kicking.”

Shame fills Jack, knowing that Tequila had hit the nail on the head. Abby woulda torn into his hide for the thoughts he had about this new soulmate without ever meetin her. Or setting his beautiful, fiery wife up on a pedestal.

“You don’t have to do anything about it.” Tequila says again, knowing that most people in the world see their soulmate as their mandatory partner. Their person as ordained by the universe. Jack had already had that, and it’s not hard to see that he doesn’t find a repeat experience to be necessary. “But at least let Champ protect her. She didn’t ask for this anymore than you did.”

“It’s my fault.” Jack murmurs already pouring another three fingers of whiskey and staring at it for a moment before he takes another swallow. “I killed her soulmate, so the universe is punishing me. Punishing us both.”

“It ain’t a punishment necessarily.” Sensing the tide turning in the conversation, Tequila drops his hat on the side of Jack’s desk and grabs himself a glass before sitting down again. “Not all soulmates are romantic, and not all soulmates are perfect. Maybe you inherited her marks so you can protect her? Who knows.”

There it is. The crux of the problem. “Can’t protect her. Don’t even know her.” Jack huffs. “Couldn’t protect the woman I loved. The woman I would die for. Shoulda died for.” He would have traded places with her in an instant if it meant Abby and Sam were safe and still roaming the earth. It would have been the easiest decision he’s ever made.

“Then stay away.” The younger man suggests instead. Pouring himself a short drink and sitting back, he offers Jack a shrug. “Let Champ protect her once he finds her, and don’t tell her who you are. What you are to her. Let her live her life. I don’t pretend to have the answers, man. But I can help you piece this whole thing out.”

Staying away sounds like a solid plan. “I’ll be back out in the field anyway.” He rationalizes, imagining that it will be just a week or two before Champ needs him. Who’s to say that this woman even wants a soulmate? She hadn’t found the Jason Howe fella. “Sometimes that bean between your ears actually works.” Jack grunts with a whisper of a grin.

“Don’t worry.” That gets a hearty laugh from the younger man, and Tequila raises his glass in salute before he takes a sip. “I won’t let it go to my head.”

Jack snorts and drowns the rest of his drink and pours himself another before he slides the bottle towards Tequila. “Good.” He jokes. “Otherwise your hat won’t fit.”

******

By every Monday morning you’re always dragging. The restaurant was packed with reservations all weekend long and you probably burned off another fingerprint trying to do the sugar work for the dark chocolate salted caramel tarts that chef insisting on adding to the menu ahead of the new year. They’re beautiful, and delicious, but sugar work is tricky with an overblown wind bag shouting over your shoulder all night. The house is bustling this morning, though, and you have your niece on your hip while you sip your morning coffee and your mother in the other room is singing songs with your nephew. The dog is somewhere, the cat is on the windowsill, and your sister is finally getting her morning shower in after getting up early with the kids because they wanted to see Daddy off to work. There’s enough going on that you almost didn’t even hear your cell phone ring in your pocket. Almost.

Champ taps the file that Ginger had given to him, listening to the ringing in his ear. The soulmate had been found, surprisingly quickly to his delight. While it was assumed that no one knew about the soulmate connection between this woman in the packet and his senior field agent, but never guaranteed. Now he just needs to pitch the winning game to get her to Kentucky.

You almost don't pick up - who would be calling you from Louisville, Kentucky? - but eventually decide that you're curious enough to answer. At the worst you'll have a two-minute conversation with a telemarketer. There are worse things in the world. "Hello?" You press your phone to your ear and shift your niece a little higher on your hip with your other hand.

Clearing his throat, Champ says your name jovially. “Champ Rogers here, happy to get you on the phone, how are you doing this fine morning, darlin’?” Some might take offense to the antiquated word of endearment, but he has a feeling you won’t.

"I'm doing well, thanks." The funny face you make at the one-year-old hugging your side makes it almost sound like you're laughing, the smile coming through in your voice. "I'm not sure I know who you are, though, Mr. Rogers. What can I do for you?"

“Apologies, miss.” Champ shakes his head at himself chuckles. He knows a lot more about you than you do him, although that’ll change if he can help it. “I’m lookin’ for a pastry chef and the head hunter I’ve paid more money than God handed me your resume and said you’d be a good fit.”

"Oh!" Well, that's unexpected. Your head nearly snaps up from sticking your tongue out at your favourite little girl and a frown wrinkles your forehead a second later. "And...where did you say you were calling from?" He didn't, but you don't want to be rude. If he's looking for a personal pastry chef or a one-time catering gig, then Kentucky is a little far for you to travel.

“Kentucky, ma’am.” Champ spins around in his chair and looks out from the top of the infamous bottle that houses his office down at the distillery below. “I run a little outfit called Statesman.” Technically Jack’s CEO on paper, but Champ has final say.

"Statesman like the distillery?" Like your father's favourite whiskey that he's been drinking your entire life and there's always a bottle in the house at all times? Statesman is head hunting you? "Without meaning to seem rude, why exactly would a distillery need a pastry chef?"

Smart as a whistle. Champ grins, delighted that Jack’s new soulmate seems to have a firm head on her shoulders. “Well, we have a little tour operation here. We have around one point three million folks file through our distillery, and I’ve been wantin’ to jazz it up a bit. Offer more than just peanuts with the whiskey tasters.”

"I see." Leaning back against the counter, you lean over and press a kiss to your niece's thin hair while you chew on your bottom lip. It is a hell of an offer, but it seems like it's coming out of left field. Not that you're going to complain about being sought after - that would be the epitome of looking a gift horse in the mouth - and honestly you're pretty damn curious. "What exactly did you have in mind, Mr. Rogers?"

Champ winces at the formality and the way the use of his legal title sits wrong on him, like an ill-fitting hat. “Pastries. Cakes and creams that use our whiskey. Fruit tarts and those little sandwiches. Somethin’ that’ll make the womenfolk happy and I’ve got a space that I want to have set up to make it an experience they can’t get anywhere but Statesman.”

"You want to have...boozy tea party food?" It's so hard not to sound excited when that's right up your alley with the exact kind of baking you already love to do. "Well, I certainly appreciate the call." And since you've never been head hunted before in your entire fucking life, you really don't know what could possibly come next. "And the position you're looking to fill is...an assistant? Sous chef?" There's no way one of the biggest distilleries in the entire country is calling to offer you a brand new executive chef position making your dream food. That would be insane.

“I don’t know what a Sous chef is.” Champ huffs, his accent butchering the word. “I want someone to run the damn thing. Make up the menus to make mouths water.” He feels like your interest might not be enough to get you here. “Tell you what?” Champ grins. “How ‘bout I send the jet to pick you up and you come on over to the distillery and see what you’d be workin’ with?” He offers. “Take the tour, see the space I want to turn into a restaurant and we can see if you think it’s a good fit?”

"The j-jet?" You stutter out the word in disbelief, eyes flying up to catch your mother's as she walks into the kitchen with your nephew in tow – only to immediately give him the quiet signal a second later when she sees you on your phone. "I, uh—" Breathe, you remind yourself aggressively. "I assume you'll want to see what I can do, as well? A headhunter is all well and good, Mr. Rogers, but if you're going to show me your space, I should at least be making you a few sample recipes while I'm there." It's all so much to take in and you're nearly overwhelmed at the enormity of it. This sounds like a dream. Way, way too good to be true.

“Please, call me Champ.” He insists, almost pained at hearing the name his father had been called for years. “Tell me what you need and I’ll make it happen. I’ll send you an email, how’s that sound? When do you think you could be here? Jet can be where you are in three hours.” The mention of a private jet always impresses, and he notices it had an effect on you.

"Well...I do have some flexible time at the moment." Two days off from the restaurant in a row is what you've got, and your mind is buzzing with possibilities. "Three hours should be enough to prep a list and book a hotel in Louisville for a night." It will be the most expensive job interview you've ever taken, but really? You can't see passing this up. If nothing else, you'll get to take the distillery tour and bring a bottle back to your dad for his bar. An unexpected trip could be fun.

“Pishaw.” Champ scoffs. “No need for you to book a hotel, there’s a residence on the grounds where we can put you up. It would be yours if you accept the job.” He smirks at the idea.

"You're kidding." It escapes your lips before you can stop yourself, and you would facepalm if you had a free hand. "Out of curiosity, Champ," the informality would never fly in your restaurant kitchen, but you actually prefer it. "What exactly would this position pay?"

“Well darlin’,” Champ admires a woman who gets down to brass tacks. “Considerin’ you’d be responsible for the menu and the runnin’ of the kitchens, I was thinking that we would start you out at 90 with a guaranteed half a percent of all profits per quarter.” Champ offers off the top of his head. He’d only glanced at the baseline salary for an executive chef when he had thought of this – though it was a good idea. “How’s that sound?”

With your phone jammed between your cheek and your shoulder and reach for your mother, gripping her hand so tightly she actually flinches as your eyes nearly bug out of your head. The base line salary you were just quoted is more than twice what you're making now, and it would have profits on top of it, and it even comes with guaranteed housing. "That sounds...like a salary that comes with a lot of responsibility," you admit, when you can finally form a damn word on your own lips again. "You go ahead and send an email with the full job description and offer, and I will send you back a list of supplies to give you a fair view of what I can do. We'll see if my abilities fall in line with your vision for the next step forward at Statesman."

“That sounds like a fine plan.” Champ leans back in his chair, sure that he’s reeled you in. “I’ll be seeing you soon, ya hear?” He hangs up the phone and starts to chuckle to himself as he looks down at your picture in the file. Poor Jack is in for a rude awakening.

"Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god." The second your phone beeps and disconnects, you stare at it like a ghost has just popped out of it before looking back up at your mother in wonder. "I just...got a job offer. For the most insane job of all time." Shoving the electronic back into your pocket, you shift your niece in your arms and place a kiss on her little head before setting her down in her highchair at the kitchen table and slumping down beside her to grab your now-cold coffee. "Oh my god."

“What in the world is going on?” Moving over to the coffee maker, your mother reaches for her own cup. It’s a routine that you two have coffee while she watches the babies for your sister.

"Apparently a head hunter got a hold of my resume and passed it on to the head of the Statesman Distillery in Kentucky." It's the most unbelievable sentence you've ever said in your life, and you fall back in your chair with a dazed look on your face. "They want to expand their food offerings for tours and events, apparently? They want me to go down there and look at the facility. Mom...that phone call was offering me an executive position."

“An executive position? To do what? Run the bakery?” Your mom turns and leans against the counter so she can sip on her black coffee. “To develop recipes?”

"Develop the entire menu, run the bakery, help roll out this whole new entertaining program for the distillery." Cold coffee is still coffee, and you drink yours slowly just so you don't choke on the drink your excitement. "The job comes with on premises housing and pays more than twice what I make now." The number he quoted is enough to boggle your mind all over again. "They're sending a private jet to pick me up and bring me down there for this interview and lord I hope this is not just some weird scam."

Your mom’s eyes widen and she frowns. “I – you should call the distillery. Ask some questions to make sure. Who sends a jet for a chef?” She doesn’t mean to sound harsh, but it strikes her as extremely odd.

"It sounds too good to be true." Your shoulders drop, and your eyes track down to stare into your coffee. "He's supposed to be sending me an e-mail with flight info and the job offer. It either won't come through or it'll be fake. But at least then I'll have two days off to wallow in the amazing job I almost had."

As if to argue, your phone dings with an email notification. Your mom sighs. “Sweetie— I—I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to sound so negative. I don’t know how this works in big corporations.” She feels guilty, like she’s stolen your happiness away and you deserve all the joy you can find.

"No, you're just being realistic." Neither of your parents are particularly negative people. You'd call them realistic optimists, if you had to give it a title. They always try to look at the best parts of very practical situations. You pull your phone from your pocket and tap on the e-mail, studying it carefully for any signs of fraud or imitation. "What do you think?" You ask your mother, turning your cell around to let her read what just came through. Decades in journalism have given her a pretty good eye for detective work.

She studies the email carefully and looks up at you. “This looks legitimate.” She admits after a moment, a smile cracking her face. “Keep your phone on you, check in with us, but I think you should go for it.”

"He wants me to make four samples for the interview." Taking your phone back, you can feel the excitement rising all over again. There's nerves there, and a little bit of fear of the unknown, but mostly a giddy amount of glee rising from the tips of your toes all the way up to the top of your head. Moving a thousand miles away from your family for a job wasn't exactly a possibility on your radar, but if this job is for real? You'd be foolish not to do it. "I guess...I guess I need to figure out what I'm going to make and send off a supply list and then pack."

“You go do that.” Your mom takes your coffee cup and grins at you. Would she miss you if you took the job? Absolutely. But this is too good of a chance for you to get out of your current restaurant. “Just think— your own kitchen where no one can yell at you.”

"And if that isn't the dream, I don't know what is." With hugs and kisses for your niece and nephew, you start to hustle out of the room but stop in the living room doorway and turn back around. "What do you think about doing Grandma Jane's coconut cake as cupcakes and adding bourbon to the cream cheese frosting?" If Statesman wanted booze in their desserts, you sure as hell weren't going to pass up the chance to present it with the family's coveted cake recipe.

“If they don’t give you the job based on that alone, they are fools.” Your mother huffs, giving you an encouraging smile. “You’ll knock them dead.”

______ Master Tags: @pixiedurango @chattychell @winter-fox-queen @lady-himbo @artsymaddie @princess76179 @paintballkid711 @missminkylove @pedrosbrat @ew-erin @sarahjkl82-blog @sharkbait77 @justanotherblonde23 @lv7867 @recklesswit @mylittlesenaar @f0rever15elf @gallowsjoker @steeevienicks @athalien @sherala007 @skvatnavle @thatpinkshirt @jaime1110 @girlimjusttryingtoreadfanfics @goodgriefitsawildworld @greeneyedblondie44 @katheriner1999 @littlemousedroid @harriedandharassed @churchill356 @ajathegreats-blog @hardc0rehaylz @beardsanddetectives @kirsteng42 @ladykatakuri @adancedivasmom @madiebear @tanzthompson @emilianamason @bigsdinger @xocalliexo @pedr0swh0r3

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[cherry-pop-elf]

could i ask for headcanons of what petnames / endearments the Weasleys like to be called by their significant other 😄

thank you if you do! and thanks anyways for reading this even if you don't 😊

Oh my god this is so adorable yes yes yes yes yes-! The flip side of what the Weasley call you. Now THEY must be attacked with the affection mwhaahahah!!!!

Nick Names The Weasley Siblings Like To Be called By

William ‘Bill’

His siblings, and the goblins at the bank, get to give him little wolf inspired nick names. Anyone else will be stabbed. But you are the exception to the rule. He won’t lie. He always gets flustered whenever you call him “Mr. Wolf” all teasingly, in a sing song tone. What gets him red in the face is you calling him “Red Riding Hood-“ Tho. As a flip of the script, and also the fact he’s a red head. That’s the only nick name you are blessed with saying. Calling him Red, Big Red Wolf, and other teasing nick names of that nature. Maybe the Weasley twins, on a good day, but you are his little fairy tale.

Charlie

He’s the playboy type, so you calling him Big Boy is a winner. Daddy to. That’s one way to get his engine going real fast. He does have a nick name he likes that you are only allowed to say, and not infront of company. Amber. He likes the nick name amber. A cute play on the fact many dragons of hoards, and a compliment to his ginger hair. Makes him feel like he’s precious. Big guys deserve to feel soft.

Percy

He’s not really one for nicknames. It feels childish to him. He has an image to uphold. He’s always trying to act like he’s the exception and what everyone aspires to be. Doesn’t help Molly fed that idea to him. Still, what gets him to flush will be those cheesey wifey names. Calling him Pumpkin, Honey, Dear, Darling. The classics. Hey, his nose is always in books. He’s got that hopeless romantic in him.

Fred

Freddy, kinda a given. A names branching off that. It’s simple and classic. But everyone does that. Like Charlie, he’s a sucker for the Big Boy comments. His real heart stopper, though, gotta be Boss/Bossman. Bossman in the playful tone, and Boss for the…You know what tone. What can he say? It feels good to be in charge.

George

Similar to Fred. Georgie though gets to him a lot. He loved being called Georgie. Along with very sugary names. Like Pumpkin, Sugar, Cupcake, Sweetie, stuff like that. He’s adorable like that. He loves flirty nick names. He just loves it. Call him Teddy Bear, and he’s puddy in your arms. Since he loves hugs and cuddles.

Ron

Ever since his sixth year at Hogwarts, he’s kinda not the most excited by nicknames. Can you blame him? He LITERALLY got drugged. Bro. There is an exception, though. It sounds egotistical, but it really isn’t. He loves when you call him “My Hero.” He doesn’t really feel appreciated or as loved as the others. He deserves to feel special. He’s not smart like Hermione, special like Harry, and don’t get him started on his siblings. Make him feel special. He deserves it.

Ginny

She has a weird thing about her femmnity. Not because she was raised by brothers. Just that she is excepted to be femmine, and gets called a pick me for not being it. So Nick names are very but it miss. Her siblings get a pass, but still. You gotta find that special one. You took notice how her siblings did dumb names. Like to make fun of the act of Nick names. Such as Gin Gin, Ginger Ale. Stuff like that. So, one day, you called her your “EnerGinny Drink-“ She laughed so hard she fell off her broom. Now you have an inside joke that her nick name is “Energy.” Only the twins figured it out, but are bros and keep hushed. So you two can have your special inside joke.