confused-squishy

[confused-squishy]

I feel like with how Fenton Luck is, the Fenton's would stumble across Damian first. Like they followed what the assassins said and raced to Gotham to get back their Danny. Except. They don't run into Danny first. They run into Damian while he's dressed as Robin.

Since Danny doesn't want anything to happen to Damian, he follows in Damian's shadow. Which he can do in his ghost form. But seeing the Fenton's triggers his fight or flight instincts, especially with how tense Damian is when they're asking Damian multiple questions about HIS twin brother.

Damian wouldn't be kind to them. This was the family that almost took his other half from him. According to his mother, these people almost took Danyal away from his permanently. So he will not be kind to these people. Manners be damned.

Danny is just worried about the Fenton's finding him and what they would do to him and or Damian.

Demon Twins AU where Danny came to Wayne Manor with Damian

Dick threw himself on the couch next to Danyal. Damian was out of the house with Bruce for the next 2-4 hours after Danyal implied Damian would love to go with the zoo with his "dad".

The family of Bats couldn't help but notice their newest pair of members acted different when apart from each other.

He nudged Danyal, ignoring the feeling of a concealed weapon in his baggy pants.

Danyal looked over, raising his eyebrows, "Huh?"

"I've been curious, Danny why are you so..."

"Normal--- While Damian is a brat?" Danyal flipped through a couple channels as he spoke, still unable to make a choice on a show.

"I wouldn't put it like that, but yeah."

"er... so as the second heir, Mother decided to focus my education on, like, blending in to any environment for infiltration purposes. She even sent me to live with a few foster families so I would get an idea of how American families think an act." He stopped channel surfing so he could list them off on his fingers, "It was two weeks with the Burns, like, a day with the Mortons, and six months with the Fentons."

"Six months?" Dick questioned, alarmed. That was a long time for an infiltration mission for someone his age. How was he not attached?

Tim, who had taken up residency out of stabbing range for this conversation, set up with his lap top and a case file spoke up, "So, you're just masking all the time?"

"Affirmative." Danyal answered in the exact same way Damian did.

"Then why is Damian so..." Tim followed up, referencing his and Damian's contemptuous relationship.

"He's throwing fits to prove to me Father won't throw us out." Danyal shrugged. He ended up settling on an Animal documentary Damian would like.

[confused-squishy]

Just wait until the Wayne's actually meet Jazz. Maybe after Bruce had to "make Danny's Lungs work again," they call his emergency contact. They've heard that he lives with his uncle (either Fright Knight in disguse or even Clockwork in disguse), but they didn't expect Jazz to be the one to arrive at the manor.

They had honestly expected his uncle to come to Wayne Manor to get Danny. But when the frantic knocking turns out to be the older sister Jazz. Well, the Wayne's aren't too friendly (besides Tim since he knows more about what their home life is).

They aren't rude, per say. Alfred would never let them be outright rude to a guest. But they aren't the nicest people either. Especially with the way Danny just lights up when he sees her. They notice the way Jazz deflates when she's informed about what happened. Probably thinking she'll have to give up even more of her time for her brother. (She was just relieved that they didn't notice Danny was technically undead. The Wayne's aren't ready for the whole Infinite Realms situation.)

(Tim personally sees this to be really funny, honestly. Since his family sees themselves as some of the greatest detectives)

Tim: I've come to you in a time of great need. I need Dick and Bruce to get off my back.

Danny: I see and what's it worth to you?

Tim: A date.

Danny: Deal! Show them this movie. Got it from a neighboring universe.

Tim: What's it about?

Danny: A little girl who has a chronic illness and is slowly dying while her neglectful parents abandon her to be raised by her older brother who is bearly older than her. He hates and resents her but she never hates him because she relies on him to survive and feels like that's love enough. She is treated like a burden by her parentified brother who takes care of her until she dies in her sleep after telling him that she will always love him. It's the perfect movie to fill your family with guilt and I use it on Jazz all the time. It will make you want to curl up into a ball and cry though.

Tim: That's evil. I'll take it.

[confused-squishy]

Danny has been reincarnated.

Which was an odd thing to realize, it wasn't even a slow one he just... snapped into it one day. One moment he was staring at a wall out of boredom the next, well, he was staring for an entirely different reason.

It was a task for his now young -he thinks around three years old?- mind to work its way through the memories, but it wasn't like he had much else to do honestly. So, what does he know?

His name is Danny, like, his actual name and not just a moniker. He was once a halfa and he already knows he's going to be missing invisibility and intangibility. He, well, died. For like, a second time which actually makes sense because reincarnation-

Anyways.

He was a clone of two people from this thing called the Justice League which, weird name but probably some government or activist group. Wonder Woman and Superman. Which were pretty weird names to name your kids but eh.

He doesn't really remember much besides that from this life, or the one from before but he's an adult! He'll figure things out once he gets out of this containment tube thing.

Did he mention he was in a test tube? He's a tube baby now. He thinks? Or maybe it's more like he's being contained.

Whatever.

So he breaks out. Thank you apparent superstrength that he has no idea why he has but he's not going to complain! He then wandered around all of the other test tubes, able to remember just enough of English to see that yea, they're dead.

He probably was too, before he had memories zapped into him. Or a vegetable.

He then finds this really big container, checks it out, then opens it because the clone inside isn't dead!

'Project Match' it said. He'll just call him Match.

Was he thanked for helping him? Nope. You would think that he would be thanked or at least somewhat respected for saving this guy but nope!

He was, quite literally, held up by his leg and dangled in the air. Who dangles a three-year-old?! Well, he was technically and adult but still! The next few things were a blur but after pulling off the old Fenton charm he found him and Match outside as he tried to stop him from attacking random people.

Luckily the charms and privilege of the youngest (he's assuming he's the youngest, because he's physically three) was more than enough to get through to him. Sure, the guy couldn't form words, really aggressive for literally no reason, really weird but also absolutely cool looking eyes. But he worked around the first issue by developing their own personal language from like grunts and stuff, the second he once again used his youngest privilege to boss him around and the third a pair of sunglasses easily fixed.

He just had to steer Match clear of those random S crest mark thingies. Which was a weird thing to hate but hey, he's not there to judge.

[confused-squishy]

DC x DP - Two of a Kind

Danny running away from his home dimension for such and such reasons (GIW, bad reveal, etc, etc) cue him stumbling around Gotham because holy mother of ambient ectoplasm, Batman.

So anyways he’s just chilling in crime alley, as a struggling guy in Gotham does and then. And then there’s someone else. Looks exactly like him. Not like how he and Dani look similar, her features just softer and rounded with babyfat, no, no, this guy looks exactly like him. Down to the barely there scattering of freckles on the nose bridge.

It’s Jason Todd. Danny is his dimensions version of Jason Todd.

[confused-squishy]

Alfred: Everyone, there is a new restaurant opening up tomarrow. You know what that means.

Waynes: *Groans*

Bruce: Alfred, do we have to? You know your cooking is going to be better.

Alfred: I must make sure I am the best chef being paid in this city. So everyone better be ready for the grand opening tomarrow, at 12 pm sharp.

Duke: I'm in class.

Alfred: You'll skip tomarrow. In fact all of you will skip work/Class.

Dick: He does this every time. It's so embarrassing.

Alfred: What was that Master Dick?

Dick: I said it's so amusing to see you question every aspect of a restaurant and chef. I can't wait to see it from front row seats ha ha ha!

Alfred: That's what I thought.

Jason: look we all know Alfred's cooking is superior to all. The only way someone could be better is if they were like a god or something. Let's just get this over with.

The following day

Batkids: This is literally the best thing I ever tasted.

Alfred: ......

Burce: Kids! Hush!

Alfred: NoNoNo no they're right. It's delicious. My compliments to the...chef.

Jazz: Thanks! I'll let my brother know you liked it.

Alfred: Please do. He's very talented. What school taught him?

Jazz: He is self-taught

Alfred through clenched teeth: How wonderful.

[confused-squishy]

@dcxdpdabbles

It probably didn't take much "talking" (bullying) for Bruce to let the Fenton kids stay at the manor. Not only for Alfred to get to know his grandchildren, but also to keep them somewhere safe while they figure out what exactly the Ecto-Acts actually are.

So Bruce and Tim are doing research while the others are getting more information from the Fenton's and keeping them company. Although the Fenton's do catch certain Wayne children's eyes. That doesn't matter at the moment. What DOES matter is that Alfred's family is in danger, and they want to help.

Damian, Jason, and Alfred are getting ready to hunt down this G.I.W. and get the answers themselves. Only things get out of hand when Danny's been summoned by the LOA. While the Fenton's are panicking trying to get Danny back, Jason, Damian, and Alfred are ready to shoot/stab their way into the League of Assassin's to get Danny back.

Alfred: Everyone, there is a new restaurant opening up tomarrow. You know what that means.

Waynes: *Groans*

Bruce: Alfred, do we have to? You know your cooking is going to be better.

Alfred: I must make sure I am the best chef being paid in this city. So everyone better be ready for the grand opening tomarrow, at 12 pm sharp.

Duke: I'm in class.

Alfred: You'll skip tomarrow. In fact all of you will skip work/Class.

Dick: He does this every time. It's so embarrassing.

Alfred: What was that Master Dick?

Dick: I said it's so amusing to see you question every aspect of a restaurant and chef. I can't wait to see it from front row seats ha ha ha!

Alfred: That's what I thought.

Jason: look we all know Alfred's cooking is superior to all. The only way someone could be better is if they were like a god or something. Let's just get this over with.

The following day

Batkids: This is literally the best thing I ever tasted.

Alfred: ......

Burce: Kids! Hush!

Alfred: NoNoNo no they're right. It's delicious. My compliments to the...chef.

Jazz: Thanks! I'll let my brother know you liked it.

Alfred: Please do. He's very talented. What school taught him?

Jazz: He is self-taught

Alfred through clenched teeth: How wonderful.

[confused-squishy]

Bruce: You know, I was really worried about how Damian was going to react to Danny. I mean, not only is Danny a parallel version of Tim, but he's also my biological son. I thought for sure Damian would be at his throat, but they had been getting along just fine.

Alfred: I concur. I figured I would be cleaning blood stains off the carpet by now, but Master Danny and Master Damian have been spending the entire day together acting like the closest of brothers. It's wonderful

Tim: Fools.

Bruce: What was that Tim?

Tim: I said you're fools. Danny and Damian do not like each other, and they are not accepting of each other. They're just doing a last hurrah before their showdown. Like a final meal, only it's activities they always wanted to do instead of food.

Alfred: What makes you say that?

Tim: Danny told me. He also said, and I quote, "There can only be one. We've decided to settle this the same way we lost our grandparents."

Bruce: What does that mean?

Tim: Look outside.

Danny/Damian in the garden:

Bruce: OH MY GOD. WHAT ARE THEY DOING!?

Tim: There can only be one.

[confused-squishy]

DP x DC Time!

(I'm gonna give Adopted Dad John Constantine another try. Please thank @dcxdpdabbles for their amazing encouragement and for helping me come up with this. They have become my new fandom buddy and we now trade story/fic's)

John adopts a Wayne??

Clockwork should have paid more attention to that, as team Phantom calls him, Damn Fruit loop! He looked around at the frozen timeline and felt his core whimper. His core-bonded grandchildren are gathered around his King as the Fentons are mid-fight against Plasmius.

Danny is bleeding a worrying amount of ectoplasm. Jazz is trying to keep pressure on the worst of his injuries. While Dan and Ellie are both in their Phantom forms guarding them both. He looked around and saw two figures mid run towards the group. A Fenton first-aid kit in their hands.

Ah yes. Young Sam and Tucker. His Kings left and right hands. They looked to be injured as well but nothing as life threatening as Danny. Which paints a picture Clockwork didn't want to be true. He should've kept a closer eye on this dimension. He had gotten too comfortable leaving it to his King that he forgot things could happen to his King as well.

He didn't have a lot of time to do this and he needed to make sure this won't rip the timeline apart. There was only one thing that he could think to do at an emergency time like this.

Clockwork made his way over to the adopted siblings and crouched down. He unfroze Jazz first knowing she'd be the calmest. She gasped loudly and started looking around before meeting Clockworks eyes. They were full of sadness and regret.

"I deeply apologize for being neglectful of this timeline. I had put too much on your shoulders and I'm sorry that I let it get this far."

Jazz didn't say anything. Just stared at Clockwork before slowly looking down at her Ectoplasm covered hands before looking at Danny's frozen pain filled face. She looked ahead seeing her other adopted siblings guarding them in case Vlad got past their parents. She looked back to where Sam and Tucker were racing over with tears staining their faces.

She then turned to Clockwork. Squeezing her hands into tight fists. She should be angry at him. Furious. She should yell at him and tell him exactly what he can do with his apology. But Clockwork is the only person who can help Danny at this moment.

"His obsession.... It used to be about-about killing Dad and being with Mom. Raising Danny to be his heir. But he's changed over the past few weeks. We didn't notice at first. He slowly stopped trying to remove Dad from the picture. Stopped hitting on Mom. But focused more on Danny. I tried talking to them about it. But they thought Vlad was just wanting to spend more time with his godson."

Clockwork grimaces. He can tell where this story is going. From the look of rage of the Fenton parents. Then glee on Plasmius face. The fury and horror on Dan and Ellie. The pleading look on Sam and Tucker. If he hadn't frozen the timeline when he did there's no telling how this might've gone.

"So Vlad Plasmius obsession is now fully on Danny. That's not good. Not good at all."

Clockwork sighed and thought deeply. He had to get Danny out of this timeline and fast before the Universe falls apart. He reached into his pocket for a handkerchief for Jazz when he pulled out a piece of paperwork. He'd been going over the Kingly paperwork when he realized what was happening. Across the top of the paper was a name that made everything click into place.

John Constantine

[confused-squishy]

Can I join the puppy yoga???

Jason should kill the Joker and just not tell anyone. like, lets be real here, if he were to silently slip in and kill the Joker in his sleep, are any of the workers at Arkham really going to give enough of a shit to say anything??? with the paperwork they’d have to do, and the attention they’d get once the media caught wind of the break in/murder, i bet all Jason would have to do is leave like, a basket of muffins next to the dead body as a thank you and the staff would just dispose of the body and shut the fuck up about it.

i bet you he could get through a solid six to eight month period of being weirdly happy and interactive with the rest of the family before Dick finally asks why he’s been in such a good mood lately over family dinner

Jason, casually: i dunno, i guess i’ve just had a weight lifted from my shoulders; there’s less to drive me away now.

Bruce, thinking he’s finally done something right: aw Jaylad, i’m so happy you’re feeling more comfortable!

Dick, the only batkid around when Jason was Robin, remembering all the times Jason would transform into the happiest kid on the planet only for them to find out a week later it was because he’d pushed a bully down the stairs at school and fractured his wrist: hold on B.

Dick: Jay, what weight has been lifted?

Jason, still nonplussed: well i finally got my GED, and the Joker thing really calmed the lazarus rage. also Steph got me into puppy yoga, we go once a week.

Bruce:

Bruce: what Joker thing.

Jason, glancing up from his food: ? d’i not mention that? he’s dead, man.

Bruce:

Dick:

Dick: sorry, what?

Tim: why the fuck am i never invited to puppy yoga?

Bruce, having a panic attack: y- what are you talking about Jay-

Tim: i would LOVE to go to puppy yoga. what the FUCK?

Jason, shrugging: you can come to puppy yoga, replacement, it’s all good

Bruce: the Joker’s dead?

Tim: FUCK YEAH, PUPPY YOGA

Jason: i think they do it with goats too.

Damian: i would be interested in this activity.

Jason: hell yeah family yoga session

Bruce: JASON PLEASE EXPAND ON THE JOKER THING

Jason: no i don’t like your tone. anyway, dick, puppy yoga?

Dick:

Dick, glancing at Bruce’s glare nervously: …i would be down for puppy yoga

[confused-squishy]

We love the protective younger siblings au. Adorable Menaces.

Everything is fun and games until Menace!Danny's little siblings find out that he's the one with a partner.

I'm a little sibling. I know we have a perfect 10 steps plan to make the partner disappear. Menace!Danny is giving shovel talk — his siblings are kidnapping and doing human sacrifice because violence is the only possible answer.

The first time it happened, it was a goth girl. Her name was irrelevant (though they would soon learn that Danny had a type), but they knew that Danny had met her at a protest.

Apparently, the two had been attempting to stop a project that was going to cause damage to the local buildings. Danny was a big fan of protecting Gotham's iconic Gothic infrastructure and was appalled that the big corporations wanted to tear it down and move to more modern skyscrapers.

Now it's well-known that the Waynes all looked up to Danny. He was everything they wanted to be.

Danny could match Bruce in hand-to-hand combat, make even the most stubborn of heroes respect him with a few soft spoken words, and not to mention his inventing ability. Danny was the glue that kept them all together and their unwavering leader in the darkest if nights.

Despite the rumors, the masses (and themselves before they actually met him) believed Danny was sensitive in an almost heartbreakingly kind way, which worried them for their brother. If the world thought the worst of him, then Danny likely had the worst of the worst attempting to use him.

The Waynes all collectively agree that no one was worthy of Danny's time, especially some goth girl who commented more than once that "dirtbags like Fenton-Wayne" were relatively easy..

And really, she was all about death as a goth, so why had she made such a big deal about them nearly feeding her to Killer Croc? If she liked Death so much, why was she even still alive? They were doing her a favor.

Danny had been rather sad for a few days when she was rejected, even when walking near him, but he took it as their personalities not matching. He was unaware of them slowly lowering her towards a canopy while Dancing Queen was playing. Dick had made sure she could see them dancing to the music as they each took turns reading the comments they documented her saying and then pulling the level to have her drop little by litte.

When she threatened to involve the cops, Tim laughed and told her they were rich. The rich always get a slap on the wrist, especially against someone in her tax bracket. More so with her having no proof.

They made sure she had no proof.

She left the city the following month, but by then, the Waynes had turned their attention to the third son of the Trox family. He had flirted with Danny, who seemed to believe it was the beginning of an epic romantic tale, unaware that the Trox boy was bragging about how easily he got the eldest Wayne on his knees.

Jason was working on how to take Trox's kneecaps without the police, Bruce, or Danny any the wiser as revenge for those comments. His siblings were more than happy to get it done.

[confused-squishy]

Dead on main writing prompt: Jason gets dosed by a rogue and accidentally exposes his and Danny's relationship......

“And this GIW kidnap ghosts?” Batman asks.

“Totally, Dad.” Jason nods. “But you can’t tell anyone I’m a ghost!” Jason claims.

“You don’t want them to get you?” Diana questions.

“Me?” Jason scoffs, “I don’t give a fuck about me. I just don’t want them to get Danny again.” He says in a duh kind of tone.

“Danny’s a ghost?” Dick asks in shock.

Jason smiles again, “He’s a Halfa; like me.”

“Two Halfas exist?” Zatanna asks sounding shocked.

Jason laughs, “Don’t be silly. There are four of us: Me, My husband, My husband’s clone, and that one asshole.”

“You and Danny are married!” Dick yells.

“Yes, Dickwing. My husband and I are in fact married.” Jason states.

“Why didn’t you invite me to your wedding?!” Dick doesn’t do a very good job hiding the hurt in his voice.

“I will invite you to the human one.”

“Wait, your wedding was a ghost one?” Dick asks.

“Duh.” Jason nods, “we’re only legally married in the Ghost Zone.” Jason then quickly adds, “Or Infinite Realms.” Jason shrugs, “Whatever you want to call it.”

“You’ve been to the infinite realms?” Constatine asks.

“Yeah.” Jason laughs. Then, stops as if realizing something, “Oh, My God.” He looks at his older brother, “Big Bird, Did I tell you that I met Jane Austin? Because I fucking met Jane Austin!”

“That’s- great, Little Wing.” Dick says in shock.

[confused-squishy]

THIS. IS. BRILLIANT!!!!

I can see the heart break that Alfred goes through hearing how his son and daughter in law sacrificed themselves for their children to survive. Especially hearing how his youngest grandchildren (Dan, Danny, Dani) are being hunted down to be experimented on because of a law that shouldn't be passed.

Alfred will absolutely rip Bruce a new one for the Justice League letting something like that happen after being told that his grandchildren and their friends have called the Justice League for help and help never came. Especially since it was up to Danny his sweetest grandson to keep the town they lived in safe! The Justice League should've checked it out, the chance of it being a prank be damned!

Since the Justice League let his children down. He'll handle this. If his non-blood grandchildren decide to help them as well he'd appreciate it. Even if Bruce tries to change their minds about how they're doing it. No. They killed his son and daughter in law and are trying to kill his grandchildren.

They'll get what's coming to them.

Alfred: Everyone, there is a new restaurant opening up tomarrow. You know what that means.

Waynes: *Groans*

Bruce: Alfred, do we have to? You know your cooking is going to be better.

Alfred: I must make sure I am the best chef being paid in this city. So everyone better be ready for the grand opening tomarrow, at 12 pm sharp.

Duke: I'm in class.

Alfred: You'll skip tomarrow. In fact all of you will skip work/Class.

Dick: He does this every time. It's so embarrassing.

Alfred: What was that Master Dick?

Dick: I said it's so amusing to see you question every aspect of a restaurant and chef. I can't wait to see it from front row seats ha ha ha!

Alfred: That's what I thought.

Jason: look we all know Alfred's cooking is superior to all. The only way someone could be better is if they were like a god or something. Let's just get this over with.

The following day

Batkids: This is literally the best thing I ever tasted.

Alfred: ......

Burce: Kids! Hush!

Alfred: NoNoNo no they're right. It's delicious. My compliments to the...chef.

Jazz: Thanks! I'll let my brother know you liked it.

Alfred: Please do. He's very talented. What school taught him?

Jazz: He is self-taught

Alfred through clenched teeth: How wonderful.

[confused-squishy]

It's literally the absolute truth! You actually inspired my DP x DC obsession and it's thanks to you I actually wrote out my ideas for others. You are my inspiration @dcxdpdabbles

If you guys haven't, please go and check out @dcxdpdabbles their writing is much better than mine and they write more than I do. They are my most favorite DP X DC writer on all of Tumblr. Their fic's and prompts are works of art honestly. Please check them out if you haven't. I know you'll find a fic/prompt you'll absolutely LOVE.

[confused-squishy]

If you guys haven't, please go and check out @dcxdpdabbles their writing is much better than mine and they write more than I do. They are my most favorite DP X DC writer on all of Tumblr. Their fic's and prompts are works of art honestly. Please check them out if you haven't. I know you'll find a fic/prompt you'll absolutely LOVE.

[confused-squishy]

@dcxdpdabbles @articpheonix

Cue to Danny, Jazz, Dani, and Dan explaining everything.

The GIW and how the Fenton parents sacrificed themselves to save them from being captured. How Vlad has been trying to capture Danny and how he's the creator of both Dani and Dan.

The batfam is just getting more and more worried about the situation they're in. Especially when Danny accidentally lets it slip that he's the High King of the Infinite Realms. How because of an "accident" that happened in his parents lab that he died and came back to life at the same time.

I can definitely see Jason's pit madness making an appearance after that. Especially since they can see the lichtenberg scars that cover his left arm and the side of his neck. He'd been nothing but a kid when all of this happened. He had way too much put on his shoulders as a kid. Much like almost the entire Bat Family.

Jason, Tim, and Damian share looks before they catch Alfred's silent fury from across the table. The one that spoke volumes. The same look that spoke pain and promises of revenge. Looks like they have a job to do.

Alfred: Everyone, there is a new restaurant opening up tomarrow. You know what that means.

Waynes: *Groans*

Bruce: Alfred, do we have to? You know your cooking is going to be better.

Alfred: I must make sure I am the best chef being paid in this city. So everyone better be ready for the grand opening tomarrow, at 12 pm sharp.

Duke: I'm in class.

Alfred: You'll skip tomarrow. In fact all of you will skip work/Class.

Dick: He does this every time. It's so embarrassing.

Alfred: What was that Master Dick?

Dick: I said it's so amusing to see you question every aspect of a restaurant and chef. I can't wait to see it from front row seats ha ha ha!

Alfred: That's what I thought.

Jason: look we all know Alfred's cooking is superior to all. The only way someone could be better is if they were like a god or something. Let's just get this over with.

The following day

Batkids: This is literally the best thing I ever tasted.

Alfred: ......

Burce: Kids! Hush!

Alfred: NoNoNo no they're right. It's delicious. My compliments to the...chef.

Jazz: Thanks! I'll let my brother know you liked it.

Alfred: Please do. He's very talented. What school taught him?

Jazz: He is self-taught

Alfred through clenched teeth: How wonderful.

[confused-squishy]

@articpheonix

It's beautiful. I can see something kinda angsty but still chaotic happening.

Alfred: You look just like your father Daniel.

Danny & Jazz & Dani: *physically cringes*

Danny: Danny. Just Danny.

Danny & Jazz & Dani: Please

Alfred: *confused and very much concerned* Alright?

Danny: The only people who call me Daniel usually try to kill and or maim me.

Jazz & Dani: *nodding to indicate he's speaking the truth*

Batfam: *worriedly confused noises* ??????

Alfred: Everyone, there is a new restaurant opening up tomarrow. You know what that means.

Waynes: *Groans*

Bruce: Alfred, do we have to? You know your cooking is going to be better.

Alfred: I must make sure I am the best chef being paid in this city. So everyone better be ready for the grand opening tomarrow, at 12 pm sharp.

Duke: I'm in class.

Alfred: You'll skip tomarrow. In fact all of you will skip work/Class.

Dick: He does this every time. It's so embarrassing.

Alfred: What was that Master Dick?

Dick: I said it's so amusing to see you question every aspect of a restaurant and chef. I can't wait to see it from front row seats ha ha ha!

Alfred: That's what I thought.

Jason: look we all know Alfred's cooking is superior to all. The only way someone could be better is if they were like a god or something. Let's just get this over with.

The following day

Batkids: This is literally the best thing I ever tasted.

Alfred: ......

Burce: Kids! Hush!

Alfred: NoNoNo no they're right. It's delicious. My compliments to the...chef.

Jazz: Thanks! I'll let my brother know you liked it.

Alfred: Please do. He's very talented. What school taught him?

Jazz: He is self-taught

Alfred through clenched teeth: How wonderful.

[confused-squishy]

The way I was cackling by the end of it. Such a chaotic brotherly love this prompt has is everything

Danny: What are you doing?

Dan: Setting up a dating profile. I think I'm ready to get out there now that we moved to Gotham.

Danny: That's great, Dan! I'm proud of you

Dan: Thanks. I'm a little nervous if I'm honest. I killed all life on earth before dating sites really took off, so I'm not too sure if I'm going to be good at this.

Danny: The first step is admitting you were wrong and trying anyway. I think this will go well—look, you already have someone interested!

Dan: That was fast! Let's see here. He's the same age as me. He loves classical books, musicals, plays, and long rides on his motorbike. His hobbies include writing and cooking, and he volunteers at the library for books with kids.

Danny: Sounds like a nerd, but that's a good start. Someone friendly and calm. This date can be a fun first time to help you dip your toes in the dating scene!

Dan: Yeah, I think you're right. I'm going to give him permission to talk to me.

Danny: What's that? *Points to approval notification*

Dan: This site only lets you see pictures once you agree to talk to someone. The creators put this in to eliminate hookups. I don't know if it's working, but now I can see his album.

Danny: Don't keep me waiting! Click on them.

Dan: Don't get your hopes up. Based on his profile, he's likely to be as skinny and scrawny as you.

*Photo Album of Jason Todd loads*

Dan/Danny:

Danny: Quick! Send him a yes for a date before he has time to see your pictures!

Dan: I'M TRYING