#dc chaos cult

[xenon-upon-the-thumblr]

Is it just me, or the Dionysus Cult seems like a discount Court of Owls? Maybe I'm just making this out because only because both of them has a maze, but... do you think CoO would also work as well? Instead of making up new cults/enemies?

You know what might be a good idea? That the cult is a splinter from the court. Bad guys are bad guys, so it shouldn't be strange that they fight among themselves. I would love to see how these groups' dynamics works.

[purple-goo-writes]

What if....

Klarion the Witch Boy was Dan? Slightly reformd no longer destroying the world and de-aged back to 14 Dan Phantom? Except even reformed, Danny's Gremlin Nature and Vlad's Need for Dramatics results in one Chaos Lord fucking with the DC world cause his good older self and Guardian only told him he couldn't kill anyone again.

Plus these mini heroes are so stuffy, they need to live a little! The Light was a bit boring though.

Everything is fine and Dandy until some cultists asshole tries to summon his Dad, thinking the Ghost king was still Pariah Dark. Now he is teaming up with the mini-heroes in order to take down a dark magic cult to stop the summoning, much to their confusion and suspicion.

Robin: why are you helping us?

Klarion/Dan: because Pariah might not be king anymore but who is King will ruin my fun!

YJ: ?!?!

Klarion: *mentally* Dad is soooo Embarrasing! If he is summoned and sees me with the mini-heroes he will he will think I have /shudders/ friends.

[ew-selfish-art]

DPx DC AU: Danny learns that he can change his summoning ritual and decides to go chaos mode with it i.e. A viral tiktok trend.

Danny ascends the throne and it's honestly pretty alright as far as new jobs go. He states a few opinions, makes sure no one goes to war and is slowly integrating a community service sentence to Walker's prison. It's not a bad gig, and considering the troves of gold he's now owner of, it doesn't pay too shabby either.

His main problem with the job isn't even his constituents (he likes to think they would vote for him over pariah), it's all these loony death cults! They keep summoning him with Pariah's old cold sign and it's driving him insane- After a very unhelpful smirk by CW, a long study session in GW's library and some help from Ember (she knows drama like no one else) Danny finally has a new summoning ritual.

Of course he swapped out the blood and bone for like, sour gummies and random shit he had in his backpack at the time. A TI-84. And yes, the Latin chant is that one super-fast bit of Rap God preformed to a BTS dance at speed.

But rather than keep this to himself, he gets Sam (who has a thriving plant and protest community following) to record her completing this ritual and Danny being summoned. Why? Cause it was a very specific to Sam skill that they didn't know if people could replicate and it gives Danny some plausible deniability that he tried to make it difficult when CW asks.

Posting it makes it very quickly go viral as people attempt to call it fraudulent but sure enough, Danny is now traveling the world at a moments notice.

Which is great cause it's summer and he's bored in Amity anyway (He's going to change it before he starts university in September, duh), and its even better because the second a lame ass death cult brings him forward to, like, destroy the planet, a slumber party or influencer has already summoned him away. Shit, he even met a few celebrities this way! Plus, turns out that most death cultists aren't able to rap!

Reality hit him pretty hard when he got summoned to an office space that is clearly a base of operations and the summoning spell locked him in. Literally, he has no idea how to get out of this binding spell- Danny definitely hadn't realized that was an option. Taking in the Justice League members in front of him, plus one trench coated menace, Danny groaned for a moment before thinking to ask:

"Wait- Which one of you was able to do Rap God? And the dance? Please tell me someone thought to film that!!"

[catchmeinhell]

Smile More

[vigil-antes]

Do you like have any good comics recommendations or anything to do with the bat fam, I don't have many DC friends so idk where to start

hiii omg ive been WAITING for this. you didnt give me any kind of parameters for what kind of fics you want so im going to list some of those i like most. its going to be a long one so buckle up:

My DC Fic Best Pics:

Short & Sweet (Oneshots/Less than 10k words)

Send to All: Crack, the bats have a sex pollen release form

glucose guardian: Funny, Tim being the caped community's accidental sugar daddy

A Brief Interview: Sweet, Damian & Tim Ageswap

curiosity and the cat: Cute, Timbern Catlad AU

Dead Meme: Crack, Jason centric, Jason keeps referencing dead memes

Have I Told You About Minnie?: Sweet, Bruce&Steph

Multi Media Marketing Mistakes: Crack, Social Media AU

an inappropriate explosion: Funny, Superman calls Batman to reel in his unruly son (Red Hood)

though your eyes will need some time to adjust: so sweet GAH, Bruce&Steph

Girl what were YOU doing at the devil's sacrament?: Funny, Timbern after the disaster with the chaos cult

Tim Drake: Bisexual Awakener Extraordinaire: Funny, YJ experiencing the mandated Robin-Induced sexuality crisis

Brotherhood: Tim&Damian, Damian Time travels right into Jason's attack on Titans Tower

Priceless: Crack, Nightwing&The Bats messing with Bane

User SuperRob: TImBerKon. Need I say more?

The Mystery of the Superboy Shirts: TimKon, Tim keeps stealing Kon's SB Shirts

Thicker Than Water: Funny, Batbros slice of life-ish

Big Bird, Commence Attack!: Crack, Jason's revenge plan involves dressing up as Big Bird

World’s Saddest Breakfast Club: Sweet, Batkids Bonding

red chrome: Funny, Tim's health is concerning enough to stop Jason from attacking him in Titans Tower

Hot Dog, French Fries: Tim&Damian, Damian gets dosed with truth serum

#SoftRobin: Funny. Damian-centric Social Media AU

Hurry Up Don't Take So Long: Sweet, DamiJon through the years

Paris vs Gotham: Crack, Social Media AU Ladybug crossover (no ships)

Can I tempt you?: TimKon, Light angst, Sweet

Bedtime Stories (15-50k Words)

Baby Birds and Bat Caves: SO funny, genuinely one of the best fics ive read, Tim-Centric, Meta(?)/Cryptid Tim, inspired by Welcome to Nightvale

Gotham Knockoff: Tim-Centric, Alley Kid Tim pretends to be the Drakes' kid to get closer to the Bats

In This or Any Other Universe: Nightwing ends up in the The Batman (2022) Universe

Dangerous and Noble Things: Kid Tim gets kidnapped by the League of Shadows. No one realizes until, four years later, the Bats notices something wrong

In this Town We Call Home: Kid Tim attracts Batman's attention to get adopted

With Violet Light: Jason finds a ring of power and becomes a Star Sapphire

Little Birds’ Wings: Jason&Other Batkids, Jason comes back from the League to a drastically different Gotham

the pact of our youth: Reverse Robins Au, TimBerKon after Tim dies (and comes back different)

Pretty Boys and Identity Problems: Sweet, TimKon, To get away from his crush on Robin, Superboy gets entangled with Gotham pretty boy Tim Drake

let's get mischievous: TimBern, during the chaos cult ritual, Bernard gets possessed by Dyonisus

It Wouldn't Be Make Believe (If You Believed In Me): DamiJon fake dating AU where they don't know each other and meet while Robin is investigating a case in Metropolis (they're uni aged btw)

I’m Pretty Sure Tim Steals Clothes: An Elaboration In The Form Of A Long Fic: Cute, TimKon, Tim keeps stealing Kon's SB shirts

Into the Deep Dark Night: Tim-centric, Tim&Jason, Tim dies as a kid and loses a bit of his humanity

Alcatraz, But On Hardmode: Sweet, Tim-Centric, A YJ mission goes wrong and Tim has to rely on Jason to get him and his team out.

His Head is Bloody, but Unbowed: Jason-centric AU where he never stole the batmobile tires, but ends up meeting the Bats anyways after he saves Robin

A Good Place: Very soft, Damian&Bruce, Damian time travels to Batman's first year of activity.

Fairy Godbrother: Sweet, The batboys time travel to each others' pasts and help their brothers when they were younger

best laid plans: Tim&Jason, Tim finds Jason after he crawls out of his grave, bt they get goth taken by the league

Mystery Man: Cute, BirdFlash, The bats aren't known to the JL, Different first meeting

One Eternal Round: Super original, Bruce&Robins, My Hero Academia crossover where Aizawa, Midoriya, Kirishima, Todoroki and Bakugo remember their past lives as Gotham vigilantes

A Meditation on Railroading: Tim-Centric, Tim's dad leaves him stranded away from Gotham with no way back. Jason finds him and brings him home

the ship of theseus: Jason-Centric, Percy Jackson crossover, Jason and Percy are secretly twins

Why They Shouldn't Have Social Media: Crack, Social media AU

Cracked Foundation:Soft, Jason&Damian, They get stuck under a collapsed building together

Monolith: Bruce&The Batfamily, The birds aren't known to the JL, The JL meeting each member of the Batfam for the first time

Loading and Aspect Ratio: SO GOOOOOOD, Batfamily, The bats use wing prothesis but everyone think they're metas

Three’s a Crowd (But I’m Here if You Are): Cute, Funny, TimBerKon

A Softer Gotham: Steph&Bruce, Steph-Centric, Steph time travels to a time before Batman, becoming Gotham's first vigilante

greatest of ease: Dick-Centric, POV Outsider, Dick Grayson as seen in the eyes of the people surrounding him

Yesterday's Voices: Bruce&Batkids, Bruce's memory of the past five years gets erased leaving behind a softer man, one who doesn't remember Jason's death

show me yesterday, for i can’t find today: Jason-Centric, Jason&The Batfam, Robin!Jason and Red Hood switch places

Eat Your Heart Out, Social Life (50k+ words)

Vultures, Squirrels, and Other Flying Menaces: So good, AU where instead of becoming Robin, Tim hires Deathstroke to kill Joker, leading to the assassin adopting him and the other Batkids.

I’m alone here, I think: TimKon, Witch Tim, Tim is erased from everyone's memories and leaves Gotham. Kon finds him anyways.

You, Me, and the Humanity in Between: Soft and sweet, Bruce&His kids, Non-Human Batkids

cards on the table: Tim-Centric, Tim&Batfam, Tim's parents fake their death and leave Tim behind. He uses his stalking skills to become a fortuneteller scammer. Against his will, he ends up befriending the Waynes

Roasted: Funny, Cute, Dick-Centric, Talon AU, Dick&Batfam, Recovered Talon Dick opens a coffee shop that ends up becoming Rogue-Vigilante neutral grounds

Code Bat: Batfam, The bats aren't known, they have an emergency code to only be used in emergency case when revealing affiliation is inevitable (idk how to explain but its good trust me)

Minimum Height Requirement: SOFT, Bruce&His kids, Batfam, Batman doesn't let his kids become vigilantes before they turn eighteen

Running Headlong into My Arms: Soft, No Capes AU, even without Batman, Bruce finds his family

Liminal Space: Tim-Centric, Tim&Bruce, Tim&Batfam, Tim ends up in a softer and kinder version of his world

Robins and Other Flightless Birds: Bruce-Centric, Bruce&His kids, A Batman without kids is visited by another version of himself. He finds tha he, too, wants kids.

Laughter Lines: JayRoy, Soft, Jason helps raise Lian, before and after his death

Stars of the Forgotten: Bruce-Centric, Meta!Batkids, Bruce&His kids, on the search for a missing Barbara Gordon, Batman stumbles upon five metahuman kids in need of a home

Latchkey: Sweet, Tim-Centric, Robin!Jason, BatWatch!Tim, The Waynes get concerned with their lonely neighbor, Tim Drake

Ain't No Compass, Ain't No Map: Funny, Tim&Jason, Borderline abandoned Tim Drake gets taken in by Crime Lord Red Hood. CPS tries investigating, with little results

And that's it for today. If you're still here, thank you so much and seriously, some of these are so good, so read them, trust me!

Sorry i took so long to get back to you, i had to organize the mess in my AO3 bookmarks and compiling this took me ages.

Let me know what you all think, and if you ever want more!!!! (Yes i have more. It's a problem)

[f14fun]

dc it-girl (mv1) - chapter 1

synopsis: in which case y/n, an it-girl that hails from the united state's capital, washington dc, meets max verstappen in an unexpected occurence at the redbull showrun in her home city. both not knowing each other, immediately find themselves in a once-in-a-lifetime love story.

general info: !fem!poc!black-reader x mv1 faceclaim: asia monet ray + other girls from pinterest/insta!

smau + prose (3.3K words) ✮ ⋆ ˚｡𖦹 ⋆｡°✩ profile | masterlist ⋆.˚✮🎧✮˚.⋆

things to note: yes, in this story i am changing the characters for a bit, i know that david coulthard was driving, but in this case we can pretend that that was max. also, he will be in dc for a publicity event for a week. please let me know if there is anything else you need me to clarify. happy reading! 💙📖💭

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yourusername

liked by florence.jwilliams, user1 and 119,012 others

yourusername: bad gyals thrive in dc

view comments:

florence.jwilliams: babes we looked so hot today xx

yourusername: i knowww, but i was dying like a bitch in the heat 🙄🙄

florence.jwilliams: might visit somewhere cold this summer j to get away from the sun tbh 😭

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Florence was always looking for shit.

She was always looking for shit for us to do, places to go, food to eat, but sometimes, it was a lot.

Like today. Although it was only the nineteenth of April, the sun was blaring down on the little city of D.C. (namely, the District of Columbia, for all of you non-natives) like an absolute bitch. And I, immune to alcohol poisoning, foot fungus, and slightly-immune to bad breath, was not absolutely not immune to the wrathful rays of the sun.

Zilch. Nada.

So when I originally left the house in a cardigan, I immediately went back in to change into a tank top and jorts. It was hot. I was hot. And Florence wanted to spend the whole day walking around the city doing God knows what.

That's how we ended up stumbling across a parade.

Every know and then when I would visit D.C., I would sometimes almost accidentally show up right in time for an event. Sometimes I happened to love the event, other times, I sometimes left, queasy, dizzy, and claustrophobic.

I wasn't sure what to make out of today's event.

At first, when looking from an outsider's perspective, it seemed as if I had walked into one large, large, cult meeting. Oh no.

Every one was adorned in shapes of navy, cheering, screaming, and worse of them all, holding a goddamn can of RedBull's Energy drink.

The air was thick with the scent of anticipation and caffeine, a cocktail potent enough to keep even the most exhausted of souls awake for days.

Banners fluttered wildly in the hands of fervent fans, each emblazoned with logos and slogans that screamed allegiance.

Vendors weaved through the throng, hawking more cans of the ubiquitous energy drink, their cries barely audible over the din.

Occasionally, a shower of confetti would rain down, sticking to the sweat-drenched skin of the masses, creating a mosaic of glittering chaos. The atmosphere was electric, charged with the raw energy of thousands of voices united in a singular, frenzied purpose.

Ew.

RedBull being one of my least favorite sodas (can you even call something you vehemently dislike a favorite at this point?) already made me additionally pissy.

So when Florence and I had just arrived at D.C. and walked towards Pennsylvania Avenue, it was too late for us to realize that the event was actually ending, and the crowd was dispersing.

Even as a girl who hails from the city, I do get quite nervous and claustrophobic around too many people. So to my utter horror, people from the flood of the RedBull cult were heading straight towards us, scattering like a pack of fleas.

Too late.

I had lost my tight grip (I swear I was holding on to her hand super duper tightly!) on Florence's hand, and we ended up getting separated from each other. Calling her name would be no use in this throng of people.

My heart pounded in my chest as I desperately scanned the sea of navy shapes, each person indistinguishable from the next in the dimming light.

Panic set in, and I could feel the beginnings of a cold sweat on the back of my neck. I tried to push my way through the crowd, but it felt like swimming against a relentless tide. People brushed past me, some nearly knocking me over in their haste to leave.

The overwhelming noise of their chatter, laughter, and the occasional burp of a RedBull can opening filled the air, making it impossible to concentrate.

It was gross. It was disgusting. I was disgusted.

I spun around, hoping to catch a glimpse of Florence’s distinctive red scarf, but all I saw were faceless masses. My phone! I fumbled in my pocket, my fingers trembling as I tried to pull it out without dropping it. Just as I managed to get a hold of it, someone bumped into me, and the phone slipped from my grasp, landing with a sickening thud on the pavement.

“Dammit!” I muttered under my breath, crouching down to retrieve it, praying it wasn’t shattered. As I picked it up, I glanced around again, my heart sinking. Florence was nowhere to be seen.

In this crowd of sickeningly electric people over an energy drink, I was dead. Six feet under. Tired, and I had just gotten to D.C..

I looked around in despair, realizing that I must have walked a few blocks without even noticing, my mind too frazzled by the chaos and my separation from Florence.

My phone was clutched tightly in my hand, my lifeline in this moment of utter confusion. I tried to call Florence, but there was no signal. "Damn this shitty data!" I cursed under my breath, feeling my frustration bubble over. The crowd seemed to close in around me, their excited chatter and laughter a stark contrast to my growing panic.

My fingers tapped frantically at the screen, hoping that maybe, just maybe, a bar of signal would appear and rescue me from this nightmare. I could feel the beginnings of a headache forming, the kind that starts as a dull throb and quickly escalates into a pounding, relentless pain.

The one goddamn day I had left the house without my morning coffee and this shit decided to happen to me...

In a desperate attempt, I switched my phone to airplane mode and back again, praying for a miracle. But nothing changed. The crowd jostled me from all sides, pushing and pulling like a relentless tide, each shove adding to my rising sense of helplessness.

I glanced around, trying to find a familiar landmark or a quieter spot to regroup, but all I saw were waves of navy shapes and faces blurred by motion and anxiety.

"Florence!" I shouted again, my voice barely carrying above the din. The energy drink-fueled chaos was suffocating, a cacophony of noise and movement that seemed designed to disorient and overwhelm. I caught sight of a bench a few feet away and made a beeline for it, hoping to gain some semblance of stability.

I was in a twisted, sick, alternative fever dream where my nightmare fuel was in fact RedBull™, ha ha ha.

Whatever, I could probably find her somewhere around the city, I mean, it wasn't that big...right?

So there I was, in D.C., by myself. Not like I wanted to go in the first place that morning, but whatever.

Lost in thought, I was just wandering around, not really concentrating on anything in particular. Horrible city instincts, might I add. Because of my absentmindedness, I clearly did not notice when I walked into someone.

More like someone's RedBull drink walked into me.

I could not escape the nightmare fuel fever dream RedBull™ agenda, couldn't I.

Now I was extremely pissed off. The icy liquid soaked through my shirt, a cold shock that made me gasp and snap back to reality.

Looking up, I was two milliseconds away from berating whoever spilled this devil-drink all over me. But my harsh words died on the tip of my tongue the very instant that I looked up.

I was looking at a man. But not just any regular man. An extremely handsome man.

His startling icy turquoise eyes connected with mine. His stubble, a little overgrown, looked so hot. His mousy, brown touseled hair gave him a nonchalant yet strangely put-together look, and I was all in for it. And I, a girl who never stops talking, I was rendered speechless.

From the first glance, everything about him seemed perfect.

Except for the fact that he just spilled RedBull all over my white tank top and he was even wearing RedBull merch, from head to toe. Like who does that? What fashion choices...

He gave me a sheepish smile, clearly embarrassed. "I'm so sorry," he said, his voice smooth and sincere. "I didn't see you there." His soft, European (?) accent lulled me to silence in an instance.

I wanted to be mad, I really did, but his charm was disarming. "It's fine," I managed to say, trying to suppress the butterflies in my stomach. "Accidents happen."

"Let me help you," he offered, reaching into his pockets and pulling out a pack of Kleenex tissues. He reached out towards me, seemingly wanting to put his hands on my shirt.

"Oh, oh, that's okay," I said, freaking out internally. If this handsome European man touched me that close to my boobs I might just have to propose to him that very instant.

"No, no, no, I insist," he said, his accent getting thicker, clearly not understanding my drift. He was too handsome to be doing this shit, I swear.

He came closer towards me, and I instinctively backed up a bit more. Not catching my drift (once again), he took a larger stride towards me. I, unprepared for this wild encounter, didn't step backwards in time, so the sexy European man in all of his glory, collided into me.

And down we went.

It must've been a funny sight to see from the average passerby. Them just minding their business. Maybe walking their dog. Or perhaps getting a morning lattee.

Bam.

Lying in the middle of the street are two people. Just there.

I would've hit my head on the pavement and probably cracked my scull wide open if not for the RedBull man. He had cradled one arm around my head, the other wrapped tightly around my waist. I think (?) he was helping me to try to stop the fall.

To no avail, we still fell.

What he disregarded, though, was when he tried to stop the fall, was the reason why we were falling in the first place. As grabbed my head as we fell, he also let go of the RedBull can. So now, free in the wind and open towards the chaos of the District of Columbia, the RedBull can fell.

Fell where? You may ask. It fell over us. It fell everywhere. The sticky, icky drink splattered across both of our faces, its cold, sugary droplets clinging to our skin like a caffeinated rain shower. The can, released from his grasp, seemed to defy gravity for a split second, twisting in the air before gravity's inevitable pull sent it crashing down.

The can hit the ground with a soft thud, its contents erupting in a fizzy explosion of energy. The liquid sprayed outward in all directions, catching us both off guard.

Streams of RedBull arced through the air, some landing on nearby pedestrians who stared in disbelief, while others formed tiny puddles on the sidewalk, reflecting the cloudy yet impeccably humid D.C. sky above.

For a moment, him and I laid on top of each other (weird and freaky, I know), frozen in a tableau of absurdity, our faces now adorned with streaks of sticky red liquid.

A passerby, caught in the crossfire, chuckled as they hurried past, muttering something about needing to wash their dog now. It was a scene straight out of a slapstick comedy, and despite my initial shock and embarrassment, I couldn't help but laugh along with him.

And you may think, oh wow, that is horrible. That must hurt. Your joints, your back, your legs. And to that I say, yes, yes, and very much absolutely yes.

The very sexy (slightly less sexy, now that we were mangled on the disgusting sidewalk) European man was laying on me with all his bodyweight, and it very much hurt.

To make matters worse, our faces collided. You ask, where did your faces specifically collide?

Our lips. Our lips collided, and they touched.

And me like the dumbass I am, when I see a face coming towards mine unexpectedly, eyes closed, and especially a face who's male.... I puckered up.

Yes, I was stupid.

Now, I was on the floor, sticky, and kissing a stranger.

Out of context, that sounds like a funny and strange sentence. But this whole scenario in the first place was out of context, so bear with me. I mean, how often do you end up on the ground, covered in energy drink, and accidentally kissing a stranger in the middle of the day?

It was like something out of a quirky rom-com (okay, more like the evil-twisted beginning to one of those abduction horror stories grown-ups tell you when you are a kid), except I never imagined I'd be the protagonist.

But in that split second, with the taste of RedBull lingering on our lips and the chaos of the city swirling around us, there was an inexplicable spark. It wasn't just the caffeine rush; it was a moment of shared laughter and unexpected connection amidst the sticky mess.

In this moment, I was either going to die because he was about to kidnap me, or sheerly die out of embarrassment. Or, I would will myself to die, this was not happening to me.

He pulled back, his cheeks flushed with embarrassment. "I'm so sorry! Are you okay?" he asked, his accent making his words sound even more sincere.

I tried to laugh it off, but the awkwardness of the situation was hard to shake. "Yeah, I'm fine. Just… sticky." I wiped at my face, feeling the sugary residue cling to my skin.

He helped me to my feet, brushing off his clothes with an apologetic smile. "I didn't mean to… I mean, that was not… you know," he stammered, clearly flustered.

"It's okay," I reassured him, despite feeling mortified myself. "Really, it's fine. Just a little... unexpected."

He chuckled nervously, running a hand through his hair. He winced, as he realized that his fingers as well as his hair smelled like RedBull. "Well, this is definitely not how I imagined meeting someone today."

"Me neither," I admitted, feeling a strange mix of embarrassment and amusement. "But hey, at least it's a memorable encounter."

He chuckled, shaking his head. "Yeah, I guess this is one way to make an impression. I'm Max, by the way. Professional RedBull spiller and accidental kisser."

I laughed, the tension easing. "Nice to meet you, Max. I'm Y/N. Apparently, I'm your victim for today."

"Victim? More like an unsuspecting hero," he replied with a playful grin. "Seriously, though, I'm really sorry about all this. Can I at least buy you a coffee to make up for it?"

"Well, considering you saved me from cracking my skull open, I think I can let you off the hook," I said, trying to sound casual while still feeling a bit flustered. "And coffee sounds good."

"Great! I know a place just around the corner. And I promise, no more RedBull," he said, raising his hands in mock surrender. (Yeah, the biggest lie I was ever told. Do not trust sexy men, they are all liars)

As we walked towards the café, the awkwardness of our first meeting began to fade into a shared sense of humor about the absurdity of the situation. Max continued to apologize, making light-hearted comments about his job with RedBull and his less-than-perfect coordination skills.

"You know," Max started with a grin, "I guess I should add 'professional accidental kisser' to my resume now."

I chuckled, shaking my head. "Not sure how many job openings there are for that, but you'd definitely stand out."

"Well, it's all about making a memorable first impression, right?" Max replied, his eyes twinkling mischievously.

"Definitely memorable," I agreed, taking a playful jab. "Though next time, maybe aim for something less sticky?"

Max feigned offense, placing a hand over his heart. "But where's the fun in that? Besides, it's not every day you get to meet someone while wearing your finest RedBull cologne."

"I have to admit," I said with a smirk, "you wear it well."

Max chuckled, nudging me playfully. "Hey, it's an acquired scent. You'll get used to it."

"And here I thought coffee was supposed to be the only thing brewing today," I teased, glancing at him from the corner of my eye.

He leaned closer, lowering his voice conspiratorially. "Who says we can't have a double shot of excitement?"

I couldn't help but chuckle at his playful flirtation, feeling myself relax even more in his company. "Well, as long as it doesn't involve any more airborne beverages, I'm all in."

Max raised an eyebrow, pretending to look offended. "Are you saying you didn't enjoy our little RedBull shower?"

"Let's just say I prefer my caffeine in a cup," I replied with a grin, sipping my coffee and meeting his gaze over the rim. "So, Max, what other talents do you have besides professional beverage mishaps?"

He leaned back, pretending to ponder the question seriously. "Well, I can juggle three balls at once. And I'm pretty good at making people laugh, unintentionally, most of the time."

"I can see that," I said, laughing softly. "You've definitely brightened up my day, unintentionally." Continuing, I said, "I was lost in that throng, no, no, no, cult of people wearing RedBull on Penn Ave. It was absolutely horrible, never again."

He guffawed loudly, so loudly, at my slightly funny joke, I for a second, thought that there was an underlying joke in my statement that I had not caught (spoiler alert, there was).

Max guffawed loudly, his laughter infectious. "Oh, I'm sorry," he managed between chuckles, "but you have to admit, it makes for a great story."

"You find this funny?" I asked, feigning offense while trying not to laugh myself. "I was traumatized by energy drink enthusiasts!"

"Hey, at least you made it out alive," Max quipped, wiping a tear of laughter from his eye. "And here you are, sharing your harrowing tale with a fellow survivor."

"Survivor?" I raised an eyebrow, pretending to assess him critically. "Or secret admirer of RedBull?"

Max shrugged, his smile mischievous. "Maybe a bit of both. It's an acquired taste, you know."

"You are just saying that as a cult member, I can't really trust what you say still. I am so sorry, but you could not pay me to drink that can of dog piss," I jokingly rolled my eyes.

Max burst into laughter, his amusement filling the air around us. "Dog piss? That's a new one! Trust me, I'm not here to convert you," he said, grinning widely. "But if you ever change your mind, I'll be here with a fresh can and an open mind."

"Hmmm... okay," I reluctantly said. (Yeah, fat chance you would get me to drink RedBull willingly)

"That only made him laugh louder. "So I've heard," Max replied with a grin, clearly taking my comment in good humor.

I chuckled, feeling a sense of relief that he wasn't offended by my playful jab. "I mean, it takes confidence to rock the RedBull look from head to toe," I added, trying to soften my teasing with a smile.

"Exactly!" Max exclaimed, his laughter subsiding into a grin. "You've got to commit to the brand, right?"

"Absolutely," I agreed, nodding. "I have to hand it to you, though. Not many people can pull off such a bold fashion statement."

"Well, thank you," Max said, his tone light and playful. "I guess you could say I'm all about making a statement."

"I can see that," I replied, unable to resist teasing him a bit more. "I suppose next time we meet, I should wear something equally attention-grabbing to match your style."

Max laughed, shaking his head. "Please do. It'll make for an even more interesting encounter."

Everytime he spoke, he made direct eye contact with me. It was so sexy and seductive, and I don't even think that Max knew what he was doing was hella attractive.

I, not immune to anything today I guess, fell hard for a stranger that I had just met.

─────────────────── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───────────────────

yourusername posted on her story

📍washington dc 🎵 see you again (ft. kali uchis) - tyler the creator

view replies

florence.jwilliams: girl we got separated and first thing you do is be big backed??? be so fr... where are u

yourusername: on a date! 😁

florence.jwilliams: oh!-

florence.jwilliams: don't be selfish and bring me back a iced coffee w almond milk and a croissant pls.

yourusername: croissant 👌🏾, beverage 👎🏾, i've had enuf of beverages and spilling today. 😭

florence.jwilliams: oop, tea

─────────────────── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───────────────────

author's note: a little short but sweet! ty guys for reading this fic! 😍🫶🏾 part two will be out sometime within the next two weeks, comment if you want to be added to the taglist! ⋆.˚✮🎧✮˚.⋆

[the-witchhunter]

DP x DC Red Signal

You know what this crossover needs? A weird situation with all of the characters stuck on a train. 

The Batfam received information that an artifact used to summon a powerful spirit(Phantom) is going to be moved on a train leaving the next morning. The problem? They don’t know who has it or what it looks like, so in order to track it they need to be ON the train. But neither the Bats nor the Waynes can be seen there without raising suspicion.

Their Solution? Use their crimesonas. So Matches Malone(bruce), Alvin Draper(Tim), Lil Matches(Damien) and Patches(Steph) are on the train.

Sam and Tucker are on the train, they tracked down the artifact that could summon Danny, the only issue being it’s in the hands of a cult. The first opening to retrieve it in months has been them transporting it for the grand ritual. Whatever the ritual is, they doubt it would be good for Danny. So Now they’re trying to retrieve it while avoiding the cult and noted criminal Matches Malone, and art thief Alvin Draper and their companions.

que shenanigans

Eventually Sam gets a hold of the artifact and decides her and Tucker need backup in the form of Danny. 

So she starts chanting

From there it essentially is this:

and boom, eldritch Danny tearing his way into reality from beyond the veil in the most dramatic way possible. Pure chaos from there

[utilitycaster]

look, I know polls are silly and fun and so I want you to understand writing this rant is silly and fun for me but EMON? Emon is the Critical Role Entry for Most Place of All Time? I must call bullshit. And so:

Friends, fellow critters, and people who have me blocked but hate read my blog each morning over breakfast: Emon is not even the Most Place on the Material Plane. It is not even the Most Place in Tal'Dorei. Hell, it's not even the Most Place on the fucking Bladeshimmer Shoreline, which includes a destroyed city now overtaken by bandits, and a cave system that hosts both a rift to the Far Realm and a different rock than residuum that can make a different magical drug than suude. Emon is if you took the aggressively mid vibes of Washington, DC and transplanted them to the inconvenient location and city of refuge for flaky people who avoid gluten for non-medical reasons of Los Angeles. The second Percival Frederickstein von Musel Klossowski de Rolo III invents the motorcar that sumbitch is going to have traffic bad enough to summon Tharizdun. Also there's a literal pit of fire that's been burning for 30 years that both hasn't been adequately addressed but also doesn't really seem that interesting. Like oh a bunch of dragons destroyed your city? Big deal. Draconia got so fucked up it doesn't exist anymore, and at least Westruun has some fucking charm. At least Pike and Grog actually lived there, whereas Vox Machina got a house in Emon and proceeded to spend their time literally anywhere else.

Here is a brief list of places on the planet of Exandria in the Material Plane - not even across Critical Role's main campaigns/EXU, which includes such non-Exandrian places as "living city of people who mind-melded and escaped to the Astral Sea during a century-plus-long war of the gods"; "Ligament Manor"; "Ryn's groovy pied-a-feu, man I wonder what made the scorch marks on that furniture, anyway", and "THE MOON THAT IS ACTUALLY AN PRISON FOR A THING THAT EATS GODS AND IS POSSIBLY HATCHING" - that are more of a place than Emon:

Jrusar: 5 spires no waiting, sweet cable car system, city almost entirely destabilized by goo creatures as part of an overly complicated plot to blow up the aforementioned moon

Bassuras: (literally "garbagetown") Run by Mad Max gangs and everyone is cool with it; regular sandstorms; one of those gangs apparently sits atop a hive mind and NO ONE has examined this (except for them)?)

Whitestone: has a tree planted by one god over a buried temple to another god that was corrupted in the name of a third, shittier god; overrun by zombies but it's fine now; streetlights and two bears that are allowed to do whatever the fuck they want.

Yios: The canal system of Venice meets the colleges per capita of Boston meets the orcs from your fantasies, also there's some kind of kitchen-based organized crime ring so intricate it could be its own campaign (so, also like Boston).

Vasselheim: literally no one understands what the fuck its government system is. Old as balls. Temples everywhere! Temples full of trees. Temples full of blood! Temples full of an old guy who will kick your ass. A sphinx that regulates the monster hunter mini-game. Presumably the giant titan full of the ancient cannibal dwarf city is like, still there, as a new fixture, since I don't see how they're moving that.

The arctic: where teleportation doesn't work, there's a river of lava in the middle of the snow, ancient ruins full of snow globes full of actual people, and the Chaos Bisexual Emerald - and that's just a smattering of what Eiselcross has to offer.

Since this is about space and not time we can toss Aeor and Avalir too, since they once were places, and while we're at it whatever the fuck is going on with the Shattered Teeth and its permanent fog cloud and fish dream cult and capitalist shipwrecked merchants.

And, of course, any arbitrary square millimeter of Wildemount, frankly, has more Mostness than the entirety of Emon could muster under absolutely ideal conditions. But for the sake of one place per region, let's hand it to Rosohna (city of eternal night for practical purposes, built over the Evil God Headquarters); Uthodurn (underground! Giant goats! Elves and dwarves, living together, mass hysteria!); Hupperdook (steampunk gnome party city); Nicodranas (Fjord, Jester, Veth, Marion, and Yussa literally all live there at once; plumbing used to be courtesy of an imprisoned marid...but watch out); and Blightshore (Blightshore).

In conclusion: Emon is boring, nominating it was a mistake, there are literally sealed gods in other parts of the world and also way better taverns, good night, and what the fuck.

[thecreaturecodex]

Demon Lord, Aldinach

Image © Paizo Publishing

[Sponsored by @vonbaghager . While doing my research for this entry, I noticed something interesting. Aldinach and Areshkagal are enemies in Pathfinder. Aldinach is the name of an Egyptian demon, but looks like a Mesopotamian scorpion-man, whereas Areshkagal gets her name from the Sumerian Ereshkigal but looks like an Egyptian sphinx. Maybe that's why they hate each other.]

Demon Lord, Aldinach CR 28 CE Outsider (extraplanar)

This creature is a golden scorpion the size of a house, except that her head is that of a bald, fanged human woman. Her claws are enormous, made out of blood-red crystal. A mass of seething scorpions crawls along her back and sides.

Aldinach, She of Six Venoms, Lord of Scorpions CE female demon lord of sand, scorpions and thirst Domains Animal, Chaos, Evil, Sun Subdomains Demon, Feather, Fur, Light Favored Weapon kukri Unholy Symbol gold scorpion with sand dripping from its claws Worshipers girtabilus, chaotic phaerimm, torturers Minions fiendish earth elementals, giant scorpions For information on Aldinach’s obedience and boons, see the Book of the Damned

Aldinach is the demon lord of sand, scorpions and thirst. She rules the Sea of Whispering Sands, a layer of nearly infinite deserts she stole from her sister Areshkagal. and continues to defend it from Areshkagal’s servitors. Aldinach has the infinite patience of an ambush predator, and the persistence of the constant erosion created by a sandstorm. She believes that she will outlast the Faceless Sphinx and maintain her rule through sheer tenacity.  That Areshkagal has yet to give up is a source of frustration, but not an insurmountable one, and the two demon lords continue to clash in proxy wars via their cults and servitors.

Aldinach usually opens any confrontation by summoning a supernaturally deadly sandstorm. Anyone who resists being immediately flensed is then met in direct combat. She of Six Venoms, as the title suggests, is a master of poisons. Her venom and any created by a spell she casts ignores almost all immunity to poison, and she can tailor the effects of her venom in order to ruin the bodies and minds of her enemies. The infinite swarm of scorpions clinging to her is an extension of her body, and quickly shred and envenom anyone who dares to strike her.

Aldinach’s worshipers tend to be as determined and patient as the Lord of Scorpions herself. The tortures of Aldinach include envenomation and thirst, neither of which are typically fast deaths, and cultists will repeatedly heal their victims and give them just enough water to live, extending the torment to weeks or months. One of Aldinach’s goals is the expansion of deserts, the better to create hard, dangerous environments to breed hard, dangerous souls. Some of her subtlest worshipers masquerade as aqueduct engineers or farming specialists, claiming to be able to eke more out of lean land but in reality spreading the desert.

Aldinach     CR 28 XP 4,915,200 CE Colossal outsider (chaos, demon, evil, extraplanar) Init +11; Senses darkvision 60 ft., detect chaos, detect evil, Perception +45, tremorsense 120 ft., true seeing Aura unholy (DC 28)

Defense AC 46, touch 13, flat-footed 39 (-8 size, +7 Dex, +33 natural, +4 deflection) hp 676(33d10+495); regeneration 30 (deific or mythic) Fort +30, Ref +31, Will +31 DR 20/cold iron, epic, and good; Immune ability damage, ability drain, charm effects, compulsion effects, cold, death effects, electricity, energy drain, petrification, and poison; Resist acid 30, cold 30, fire 30; SR 39 Defensive Abilities Abyssal resurrection, freedom of movement, swarm skin

Offense Speed 80 ft., climb 40 ft., burrow 40 ft. Melee sting +42 (2d8+17 plus poison), 2 claws +42 (4d6+17/17-20 x3 plus grab) Space 30 ft.; Reach 30 ft. Special Attacks command vermin, constrict (claw, 4d6+25), crystalline claws, flensing storm, rend (2 claws, 4d6+25), she of six venoms, sneak attack +4d6, swift sting Spell-like Abilities CL 27th, concentration +37 Constant—detect chaos, detect evil, freedom of movement, speak with vermin, true seeing, unholy aura (self only) At will—air walk, blasphemy* (DC 27), cup of dust* (DC 23), cloudkill* (DC 25), greater dispel magic, greater teleport, overwhelming poison (DC 26), sunbeam* (DC 27), unhallow, unholy blight* (DC 24) 3/day—control weather*, empowered horrid wilting (DC 28), quickened sirocco (DC 26), summon demons and scorpions, sunburst (DC 28) 1/day—dominate monster (DC 29), power word kill*, sea of dust * Aldinach can use the mythic version of this spell in her domain

Statistics Str 45, Dex 24, Con 40, Int 28, Wis 29, Cha 31 Base Atk +33; CMB +58 (+62 grapple); CMD 68 (80 vs. trip) Feats Blind Fight, Combat Reflexes, Critical Focus, Empower SLA (horrid wilting), Exhausting Critical, Fatiguing Critical, Greater Vital Strike, Improved Critical (claw), Improved Initiative, Improved Vital Strike, Lightning Reflexes, Nimble Moves, Power Attack, Quicken SLA (sirocco), Skill Focus (Stealth), Stand Still, Vital Strike Skills Bluff +46, Climb +58, Heal +42, Intimidate +46, Knowledge (arcana, dungeoneering, religion) +42, Knowledge (geography, planes) +45, Perception +45, Sense Motive +45, Spellcraft +42, Stealth +41, Survival +45, Use Magic Device +43; Racial Modifiers +8 Stealth Languages Abyssal, Celestial, Draconic, Infernal, speak with vermin, telepathy 300 ft. SQ demon lord traits

Ecology Environment any deserts (The Abyss) Organization unique Treasure triple standard

Special Abilities Command Vermin (Su) Aldinach can command creatures of the vermin type to do her bidding as a move action, either via using his ability to speak with vermin or via telepathy. This affects vermin within 300 feet (Will DC 36 negates). This functions like mass suggestion, but can affect mindless creatures. Aldinach can suggest obviously harmful or suicidal acts (though non-mindless creatures gain a +10 bonus on their saving throws against these suggestions). The commanded course of activity can have a duration of up to 1 hour. If Aldinach issues a new command to a creature, the previous command is discarded. Once a creature succeeds at its save against this effect, it is immune to further commands from Aldinach for 24 hours. The save DC is Charisma-based. Crystalline Claws (Ex) Aldinach’s claw attacks threaten a critical hit on a roll of 19-20, and deals x3 damage on a successful critical hit. Flensing Storm (Su) As a standard action, Aldinach can conjure a supernatural sandstorm at a range of up to 300 feet. The storm fills a sphere in a 40 foot radius, blocking vision as a fog cloud, and dealing 10d6 points of slashing damage and 1d4 Constitution damage a round. A successful DC 36 Reflex save negates the Constitution damage and halves the slashing damage. As a move action, Aldinach can move the storm up to 60 feet. Aldinach can see through her own flensing storms without penalty. A flensing storm can only be dispersed with wind of hurricane force or stronger, and lasts for 2 minutes. Aldinach can use this ability at will, but can only have one flensing storm in existence at a time. The save DC is Charisma based. Poison (Ex) Sting or swarm skin—injury; save Fort DC 41; duration 1/round for 6 rounds; damage 2d4 Str, Dex, Int, Wis or Cha damage or 1d6 Con damage; cure 3 consecutive saves. The save DC is Constitution based. She of Six Venoms (Su) Aldinach can change what ability score her poison deals damage to as an immediate action. She can change the ability damage for her swarm skin ability separately. Any poison damage dealt by Aldinach ignores all poison immunity except from a mythic source. Speak with Vermin (Sp) This functions as speak with animals, except that Aldinach can communicate with creatures of the vermin type. Summon Demons and Scorpions (Sp) When Aldinach uses her summon demons ability, she may also summon giant scorpions of any size with the demonic vermin or half-fiend templates. Swarm Skin (Su) Any creature that touches Aldinach with a melee weapon, natural weapon, touch attack or unarmed strike must succeed a DC 33 Reflex save or take 5d6 points of slashing and piercing damage and be exposed to her poison. Manufactured weapons with the reach property do not endanger their wielder in this way. The save DC is Dexterity based. Swift Sting (Ex) Aldinach can make a single sting attack as a swift action. This is in addition to all of the attacks she makes as a full attack action.

[demonboi96]

Danny Phantom X DC Fanfic Prompt

With Halloween fast approaching Danny is prepping to deal with Fright Knight incase someone decides to release him from his pumpkin again this year as he can't just guard it cause he has things to do. However what he wasn't prepared for was the Infamous league of villians to set bombs full of the scarecrows fear toxin off across the entirety of the united states. So when a shady cult summons the Fright Knight he is both relieved and irratated that he has to deal with both this fear toxin and the ghost of all hallows eve at once.

Meanwhile the Justice League is trying to minumise damages from the fear toxin, find the league of villian (which wasn't too hard as they were causing some considerable damage themselves and causing quite the scene), disperece as much of the fear toxin as possible, and now there are reports of the headless horseman causing havoc and chaos through the state of Winsconsin. And after dealing with most everything else they go to confront the mystical figurr only to catch site of a deathly pale teen in a hazmat suit fighting the figure and winning.

[captain-krow-drozdov]

Aight This Is Haunting (hah) My Brain So Here We Go! Dp x Dc Thing Where Danny Phantom Is Just A Cartoon In The Dc-Verse And DC Is Just Comics/Cartoons In The Danny phantom-Verse (DP-Verse Is More Phandom Heavy Which Will Cause DC-Verse Folks Some Concerned Confusion Later On)

Que A Very Confused King Danny Getting Summoned By (Insert Cult Here) Or The JL/Batfam + Constantine And He Looks Around Spots Batman And Promptly Points At Him And Goes "Bruce Wayne????!" Meanwhile One Of The Batkids (I Feel Like Danny Phantom Would Be Tims Bi Awakening Of He Had Access To The Cartoon, Vice Versa For Danny TBH) Pointing And Going "Danny Phantom?????!"

Just Both Sides Hella Name Dropping Secret IDs And Occasionally Personal Shit, Chaos In General Ya Know?

[the-90s-music-colosseum]

September 24th - a very important day for '90s music

Released on September 24th, 1990 (dates vary by region):

AC/DC - The Razor's Edge

Fields of the Nephilim - Elizium

Released on September 24th, 1991 (dates vary by region):

Red Hot Chili Peppers - Blood Sugar Sex Magik

Nirvana - Nevermind

A Tribe Called Quest - The Low End Theory

Pixies - Trompe le Monde

Kyuss - Wretch

Primal Scream - Screamadelica

...and many more including Van Morrison, The Cult, Kid 'N Play, Prong, Thompson Twins.

Originally scheduled for this day but delayed until October: Soundgarden - Badmotorfinger

Released on September 24th, 1996 (dates vary by region):

Weezer - Pinkerton

The Roots - Illadelph Halflife

Sheryl Crow - Sheryl Crow

John Parish and PJ Harvey - Dance Hall at Louse Point

Making this post has made me aware that I missed a lot of very important album birthdays in the past three weeks and I am very sorry to: *deep breath*

Muse - Showbiz, Bjork - Homogenic, Nine Inch Nails - The Fragile, Tori Amos - To Venus and Back, Type O Negative - World Coming Down, Hole - Celebrity Skin, Manic Street Preachers - This Is My Truth Tell Me Yours, Blonde Redhead - In an Expression of the Inexpressable, Mariah Carey - Butterfly, Incubus - S.C.I.E.N.C.E., Dream Theater - Falling Into Infinity, Tool - Ænima, Jamiroquai - Travelling Without Moving, Suede - Coming Up, R.E.M. - New Adventures in Hi-Fi, Blur - The Great Escape, Red Hot Chili Peppers - One Hot Minute, The Notorious B.I.G. - Ready to Die, Nirvana - In Utero, Melvins - Houdini, De la Soul - Buhloone Mindstate, Sepultura - Chaos A.D., Nine Inch Nails - Broken, Blind Melon - Blind Melon, Madonna - Erotica, Suzanne Vega - 99.9F°, Talk Talk - Laughing Stock, Guns N Roses - Use Your Illusion, Hole - Pretty on the Inside, Ozzy Osbourne - No More Tears, Rush - Roll the Bones, Cocteau Twins - Heaven or Las Vegas, Megadeth - Rust In Peace, Judas Priest - Painkiller, INXS - X, and anyone else who I forgot.

September is such a brilliant month for 90s albums! I'll try not to miss any more important birthdays.

[bloodymary83]

Have you ever danced with the devil in the pale moonlight?

I was thinking about how all of Joker’s previous memories seem to be of him as being a failed comedian. Which made me think about celebrities in general and conspiracy theories. People used to believe that successful celebrities achieved their fame by selling their soul to the “Devil”, honestly the theories haven’t changed much now with the red shoe conspiracies and the secret celebrity cults and not so secret celebrity cult Scientology. This ideology is probably true with the DC universe. Now the Joker seems to have a fascination in cults and witchcraft. He probably felt that way when he was a nobody too. I have a theory that pre-Joker so desperately wanted to be a comedian that he made a deal with the devil. Only there’s always some weird clause the devil usually slips in. Let’s say pre-Joker tells the devil he wants to be the funniest person in the world. Which the devil grants only the catch is, since comedy and the idea of what is funny is up to what each individual audience personally thinks is funny. So pre-Joker becomes current Joker and can only perform jokes that the devil thinks are funny, like mass murder, destruction, genocide and chaos.

[eddiethedeppressing]

THIS IS ALL ABOUT ME :D🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️🧚‍♀️

[Btw welcome to the blog of Chaos >:3]

I’m a minor :) so ,20+ , please go away:3

🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️

I’m transgender,genderfaun,bisexual? And asexual!

I use He/They/xe/bee/fae/void please use them( i mean it🤺🤺/j)

My names are : Edward ,Eddie , Felix and/or shark :D ( please use them all :3 or you could choose one ☝️:]

Btw my birthday is on the 28th Nov >:3

KIT CONNOR ❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥

🦈🦈🦈🦈🦈🦈🦈🦈🦈🦈🦈🦈🦈

I’m a therian :/ and my theriotypes are : Red fox , border collie and robin !

I am mentally ill :( i have depression, ed, social anxiety, anxiety, separation anxiety, sh addiction and probably more .

🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍⚧️

I know how to skateboard ( i am absolutely shit at it ) i also have an electric guitar that I don’t know how to play :D

I am not good at school. lol

🦕

I have a GAY friend group

❤️🧡💛💚🩵💙💜🩷❤️🧡💛💚🩵💙

There is a king ruling my country ( *cough cough im British 🇬🇧🇬🇧🇬🇧

C-PTSD

I hate my mum.

Rhincodon Typus 🦈🩵🩵🩵🐋

TV SHOWS I LIKE: BNA , Rick and morty , heart stopper , the owl house, gravity falls, star vs the forces of evil , HEATHERS, Bluey, Bee and Puppycat , Kipo and the age of the wonder beasts , Hilda , Helluva Boss , I am not okay with this and tadc . I am planning on watching Good Omens it’s just I don’t have time:)

🎸🎸🎸🎸🎸🎸🎸🎸🎸🎸🎸🎸🎸🎸🎸🎸

Musicians/bands I like :cave town , Noah fincce, mother mother , the wallows , TX2 , girl in red , TV girl , Clairo, Alex g , cults , Good Kid , Melanie Martinez, Oscar lang ,Sum 41, Madeline Mae , AC/DC and Jack Stauber.🫧

I’m neurodivergent: I have ADHD and autism lol🧍‍♂️

The founder of bread sluts🍞🥐🥨

I REALLY like animals . I even remember some scientific names of foxes a red fox is called ‘ vulpes vulpes ‘ and an Arctic fox is called ‘ vulpes lagopus’ . Pretty cool eh?

🌈🌈🌈

I have sensory processing disorder😭😭

Sagittarius :D

I have a BILLION teddies/plushes hdjdhevgshshshsjsjsjsbsnjsjsjdjdjdnsvsgsghshsudjbckjsfwvjdodgwcsjcidggebskxjsfsgsmdj:))

I also really like flowers, I have millions of drawings and fake 3D ones . My parents don’t trust me with real flowers so they give me fake ones :|

🌱🌼🌸🌺🌹🌷🥀💐🌾🍄🍁🍂🍃🌿🌲🌳

I’m in your walls

My favourite colours are BLUE and YELLOW

OMG JAKE AND JOHNNIE AAAAAAA AND SAM AND COLBY AAAAAAAAAAAAAA ( I’m not one of Sam and colbys creepy fans like I don’t want them to fuck me , I just like their content and Humor )

PLACES I WANT TO GO: Florida , Australia, Tokyo , Paris and Germany :D🇺🇸🇦🇺🇯🇵🇫🇷🇩🇪

Please don’t be a dick.

Have a good day :D🧚🧚‍♀️🧚‍♂️

Bread slut😊

[cobbleztone]

Things i would do if sent into media i like:

Mha: Start a cult worshipping Momo Yaoyorozu as she has possibly the most powerful quirk in the show and manga.

Ninjago: kill Nadakhan, the Mechanic, and Vex, then adopt Harumi and ground her for evil.

That Time I Got Reincarnated as a Slime: Chill with Rimuru, and nerd out with Veldora.

Gravity Falls: Piss on Bill's physical form before smashing it with a hammer.

Owl House: Hug everyone there because they have trauma

Chima: Drop kick, Cruller

Marvel Comics: High five Dr Doom, kill Paul, hug Peter (he needs it rn)

DC Comics: Go to Wayne Manor and get Batman's autograph (after explaining im from a place where he is a comic character that i love)

MCU: Punch Ironheart (in the comics she is an entitled spoiled brat who has a victim mentality and lies more than Stark), punch Wolverine (not because he did something, i just want to know what it would be like, and take a photo with America's Ass- I MEAN, Steve Rodgers.

DCU: Kill Jared Leto's Joker.

Farming life in another world: Explore and meet my favorite characters (it's a slice of life anime, what did you expect)

One Piece: Hang out with the Straw Hats and Punch Buggy before leaving.

Dragon Ball: Chill with Whiz, Beerus, and Goku. Experience the hyperbolic time chamber (just to know what it's like)

God Of War: Talk with Mimir because i think it would be amazing and informative. See if i could hold one of the blades of chaos or Leviathan Axe, see the light of Alfheim.

Record Of Ragnorok: talk with Jack the Ripper and Buddah.

Atla: hang with Sokka.

Cyberpunk 2077: kill Dexter DeShawn, and hang with Jackie Wells.

Star Wars: Kill Palpatine, knock some sense into the Jedi Council, and fuck around with Hondo Ohnaka

[saitama-vs]

Hello. THis is the big list of all the results, sorted alphabetically. Warning: LONG LIST UNDER CUT.

Aang from Avatar: the Last Airbender 41.0%

Ahti the Janitor from Control 52.8%

Akinator from Akinator 47.8%

Amelia Bedelia 80.8%

Amy Wong from Futurama 31.4%

Arale Norimaki from Dr. Slump (and one episode of Dragon Ball Super) 78.3%

Assassinlan Pasalan from The Battle Cats 54.0%

Astarion Acunin from Baldur's Gate 3 8.5%

Bambi from Bambi 19.1%

Barney the Dinosaur from Barney and Friends 27.8%

Batman 11.4%

Beedle from The Legend of Zelda: Skyward Sword 52.5%

Bennett from Genshin Impact 18.3%

Bocchi from Bocchi the Rock 55.7%

Boyfriend from Friday Night Funkin' 22.2%

Brassmo the Chao from Saltydkdan 83.2%

Buggy the Clown from One Piece 37.9%

Bugs Bunny 86.2%

Bunga from The Lion Guard 25.0%

Burgerpants from Undertale 34.7%

Captain Biceps from Captain Biceps 22.9%

Cats from Real Life 76.4%

Cecil Palmer from Welcome to Night Vale 72.1%

Charlie Kelly from Its Always Sunny in Philadelphia 24.1%

Chell from Portal 54.9%

Chompy from Bug Fables 87.2%

Clover from Homestuck 57.1%

Columbo from Columbo 79.3%

Connecticut Clark 71.9%

Dan from Dan VS. 38.6%

Death from Discworld 63.7%

Discord from My Little Pony 34.2%

Ditto from Pokemon 57.0%

Divecat build Purrloin from Competitive Pokemon 62.8%

Dougie Jones from Twin Peaks: the Return 43.5%

Ebony Dementia Darkness Raven Way from My Immortal 45.8%

Eduardo from Foster's Home for Imaginary Friends 40.3%

Fear from Inside Out 23.0%

FEAR rattata from Competitive Pokemon 57.5%

Figment the Dragon from EPCOT 47.0%

Flabébé from Pokémon 36.9%

Flan from Everhood 41.6%

Flora Reinhold from Professor Layton 72.2%

Fumihiko Takaba from Jujutsu Kaisen 62.9%

Gamzee Makara from Homestuck 41.5%

Genie from Aladdin (1992) 66.2%

Genie from Aladdin (2019) 14.3%

Gir from Invader Zim 61.5%

Gnome Ann from Xkcd 85.6%

Gorgeous Freeman from Gorgeous Freeman 56.8%

Gotrek Gurnisson from Warhammer Fantasy 63.1%

Hatsune Miku 73.8%

Holly Jolly from Sleepless Domain 72.6%

Homura Akemi from Madoka Magica 28.1%

Imposter from Among Us 50.5%

Ingo and Emmet from Pokemon 47.7%

Isca the Unbeaten from X-Men 3.1%

Jailbot from Superjail 46.2%

Jerry from Tom & Jerry 89.7%

Joltik from Pokémon 68.7%

Kabal from Mortal Kombat 23.2%

Kanade Yoisaki from Proseka 33.3%

Karl the Raccoon from Bungou Stray Dogs 84.9%

Kira from Death Note 16.9%

Kirby 86.8%

Kobeni from Chainsaw Man 53.4%

Kyubey from Madoka Magica 20.6%

Lamb from Cult of the Lamb 51.5%

Larry the Cucumber from Vegetales 48.2%

Leeroy Jenkins from World of Warcraft 37.2%

Link from The Legend of Zelda 22.0%

Luigi, While Doing Nothing 79.3%

Luo Binghe from Scum Villain’s Self-Saving System 43.4%

Macbeth 15.6%

Madoka Kaname from Madoka Magica 49.0%

Magda from The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild 67.0%

Mandy from The Grim Adventures of Billy & Mandy 52.6%

Maxwell from Scribblenauts 75.4%

Melissa Foddebrat from Beware the Villainess 40.5%

Metal Cat from The Battle Cats 51.6%

Mindy from Animaniacs 58.4%

Minimoose from Invader Zim 82.3%

Mio Naganohara from Nichijou 80.3%

Mister Invincible from Mister Invincible 76.3%

Mister Miracle from DC Comics 37.0%

Mob from Mob Psycho 100 41.2%

Monkey D. Luffy in Gear Fifth 25.6%

Monokuma from Danganronpa 16.1%

Mosquito from One Punch Man 76.1%

Mr. Bean from the Mr. Bean Show 51.1%

Nahida from Genshin Impact 15.4%

Neco-Arc from Tsukihime 70.9%

One of Every Pokemon 44.5%

Orko from He Man/Masters of the Universe 53.4%

Peegue from Return to Wonderland/Wonderland Secret Worlds/the Wonderland Adventures trilogy 59.1%

Phoenix Wright from Ace Attorney 57.4%

Percy Jackson from Percy Jackson and the Olympians 10.1%

Perry the Platypus from Phineas and Ferb 66.4%

Pikmin from Pikmin 77.4%

Pinkie Pie from My Little Pony 90.4%

Plank from Ed, Edd, N' Eddy 74.7%

Plankton from Spongebob 29.1%

Pop Fizz from Skylanders 41.6%

Princess Tutu from Princess Tutu 63.4%

Prismo from Adventure Time 61.2%

Q from Star Trek 33.3%

Raku-Chan from Nyan Neko Sugar Girls 42.1%

Reigen Arataka from Mob Psycho 100 41.5%

Remy from Ratatouille 54.2%

Rick Shades from Epithet Erased: Prison of Plastic 16.6%

Rio Mason Busujima from Hypnosis Mic 29.6%

Roadrunner from Looney Tunes 93.8%

Roger Rabbit from Who Framed Roger Rabbit 66.1%

Ryan, the 'I Like Trains' kid from ASDFMovie 68.1%

Saiki Kusuo from The Disasterous Life of Saiki K 65.7%

Saint from Rain World 56.4%

@saitama-vs 30.3%

Sans from Undertale 51.3%

Santa Claus 64.2%

Saxton Hale from TF2 43.5%

SCP-682, The Hard-to-Destroy Reptile 24.2%

Shedinja from Pokemon 72.5%

Sissel from Ghost Trick 68.3%

Six Balls from Scum Villains Self Saving System 70.1%

Socioeconomic Inequality from Real Life 72.3%

Spider Ham 53.0%

Spies from Spy vs Spy 45.3%

Squirrel Girl from Marvel Comics 83.5%

Stanley from The Stanley Parable 49.0%

Starchild Dave Bowman from 2001 34.7%

Steve from Big Top Burger 81.7%

Stuart Little from Stuart Little 23.7%

Swarm of Bees from Real Life 83.5%

Tenma Tsukasa from Project SEKAI 39.9%

The Animaniacs 86.9%

The Cabbage Merchant from Avatar: The Last Airbender 33.6%

The Djinn from Twisted: the Untold Story of a Royal Vizier 86.5%

The Great Gazoo from The Flintstones 55.7%

The Goose from Untitled Goose Game 94.3%

The Gopher from Caddyshack 79.4%

The Groke from Moomins 73.5%

The Midnight Crew from Homestuck 23.9%

The Monty Python Rabbit 64.8%

The Penguins from Madagascar The results of this one are complicated

The Pink Panther from The Original Pink Panther Cartoons 87.5%

The Swan from Hot Fuzz 90.7%

The TF2 Mercs The results of this one's complicated

The Tick from The Tick (1994) 34.7%

Tom Bombadil from Lord of The Rings 80.5%

V1 from ULTRAKILL 65.9%

Vriska from Homestuck 36.2%

Xi Ping/Xi Shiyong/Tai Sui from Tai Sui 34.2%

Yonah from Nier Replicant 28.6%

You 22.6%

Youngster Joey's Top Percentage Rattata 37.9%