#do you guys put your cereal in the microwave???

[yeahprobablyamimic]

because! i! can! the dads! fatal! flaws! (major season 1 spoilers )

darryl is loyal to a fault. This is something we've known since the very very first episode. The charleston chews? the unexplainable emotional attachment to a candy his dad liked years ago? his choosing them over a honest relationship with his wife? he accidentally betrays every person in his life trying to be loyal to them. He lies to carol and goes to bars in the morning to watch soccer to support Grant. He lies to Grant about his relationship with Carol and then makes his son distrust him even more. He tried to set up Yeet and Grant only to sabotage his relationship with Grant in the process. He tries his best but goes about it the wrong way every single fucking time. without fail, literally. But he keeps trying, because those relationships mean more to him than anything else ever possibly could

henry i think is unable to comprehend malicious intent. He was the first one to point out to ron, "Willie is still your father", and i don’t think he can truly realize that people at their core can be evil. He tries his best but he overdoes it most of the time. Yeah his dad was a piece of shit too, but he found a healthy loving relationship with Mercedes almost immediately as he came out of the forgotten realms, and didn't even remember the abuse and scrutiny he faced there for a looong time. He sees his boys fight and genuinely harm each other (and trees around them) but can only ever see it as playful fighting. he forgives and forgets too easily and its what led him to be stabbed by lark in the final episode of season 1- and he STILL forgives lark almost immediately

glenn. glenn has this overwhelming need to be liked. It’s why he smokes weed with his son (he has to be the cool dad) it’s why he became a artist (no one can feel too depressed over their dead wife when a crowd is clapping for them) it’s why he's the first one to make a joke out of the situation. If people are laughing with you, they cant feel sorry for you. If he can make people laugh, they'll think hes funny. chill. a normal guy not fucking terrified of driving on highways. not someone who lost his wife to a car crash he blames on himself. He’s the funny one. The cool one. The one that everyone likes. He can't take anything seriously because no one likes a serious guy. They like the fun loving, weed smoking, rock band artist persona he puts on.

Ron is hyper independent when it comes down to it. The first time Samantha makes dinner for him when he gets home late from work he freezes. Did he do something wrong? Is he allowed to eat it? What is she trying to get him to do? Is she breaking up with him? He panics and just kinda freezes until she explains to him that she just got off early and was craving lasagna. It took ron months to figure out how to make multiple serving meals. He was so used to microwave dinners and dry cereal that he didn’t really know people would make each other food just cause they loved him 

[dinodinodin0]

daddy!eddie x little!reader? any storyline, i just have been thinking abt this a lot n i love your writing!!

Thank you! I like that you gave me such an open prompt because now I have an excuse to write it lol.

! ♡ ୧꒰*´꒳*꒱૭ ✧ ！

"hey Ed's, you still up for hanging out this weekend?" You asked, sitting down at the hellfire table.

"oh of course, as long as you behave yourself unlike last time," he glances, glaring jokingly at you.

You giggle and blush.

"oh gross you guys," Dustin says, Mike laughing at his disgusted face.

You and Eddie laughed at him, not because he was right but because he was. Painfully wrong.

Last time you slept over for the weekend at Eddie's, you absolutely blew up the inside of his oven. As in, the brownies you attempted to make splattering everywhere.

Eddie never lets you go by the oven when you're little, but you tried to seem as big as possible so he'd let you bake without his supervision. Now, you do know how to bake brownies, but little you somehow has a "too much gene" whereas big you doesn't.

You decided to put cereal in the batter, because; I mean, cereals good on it's own, it'd probably be better in a brownie!

When adding the dry ingredients, you completely discarded the measuring cups. You were entranced by the falling sand like sugar, and that was your biggest mistake. You added too much baking powder. Way too much. And so, your delicious cereal-and -an-ungodly-amount-of-sugar brownies, had met their match in the oven.

You knew your lesson now though, so though you couldn't promise you wouldn't get into some mischief, you had promised him you wouldn't go near the oven.

After school, he drove you to his trailer in his van. He put on his music a bit quieter than usual, but not too much. He loved shooting glances over at you to see you bouncing in your seat to his music.

He held your hand and helps you out if his van, walking you into him home.

"okay sweetheart, what do you wanna do now huh?" He said crouching down to you.

Hmmm, you thought, greatly weighing your options.

You pointed to his VHS cabinet, and he immediately turned and knew what you'd meant.

He bought you some movies just for your visits. He had gotten you movies from carebear, muppets, and sesame street.

He sat you on his couch and laid out your selection onto the coffee table.

"alright doll. Which one d'you wanna watch today?"

You pointed at The Carebear Movie II, smiling up at Eddie, who was already setting it up.

He sat next to you as it started to play, picking you up and setting you on his lap and bouncing you.

You giggled at him and watched the screen intently, pointing out every moment your favorite carebear was on screen. After 45 minutes, you started to feel your eyes droop. You yawned and stretched your arms as far as you could, rubbing the sleepyness from your eyes.

"you getting sleepy sweetheart? Ykno you're reminding me of someone I know right now," he says, peering over your shoulder to look at you.

"who?" You questioned.

"just an old friend if mine called bedtime bear," he said, grabbing a plushie of him from under the coffee table, sort of amazed you hadn't noticed him.

You laughed at his bear sneak attack as he pretend bedtime bear was climbing you, dragging him up your arms and making fake exasperated sounds. He chuckled at you and places him in your lap.

"you're so adorable. D'you want me to make you your milk yet baby?"

You nod, eyes starting to water from tiredness. He lifts you off his lap and sets you down on the end of the couch.

He pours milk into a mug, dropping vanilla and a tablespoon of sugar into it. He sets it into the microwave for a minute, then transfers it into a baby bottle.

He checks the template on his wrists and calls to you, letting you know that he was coming over to you.

He comes back to find you curled up and sucking your thumb , eyes half lidded and barely awake.

"c'mon doll, just finish this and I'll tuck you in okay?" He says, positioning you to the side on his lap and holding your head in his hands.

You fall asleep as he feeds you, and he almost melts at the sight of you. He picks you up and carefully walks with you to his bed. He gently sets you down, laying your head on the pillow and tucking in with your favorite blankie. He sets bedtime bear near you, and you immediately hug it in your sleep, which he finds adorable.

He kisses the top of your head and turns off the lights, setting you down for your nap.

I hope you like it ! This one's a bit more niche with the carebears and the bottle, admittedly self indulgent given.. I have all the carebear movies on VHS.. and a 1985 birthday bear. Maybe a t a d bit self indulgent lol.

[phoenixyfriend]

Masterlist: Polls (non-Star Wars)

Navigation Post

Fun fact, tumblr allows 250 links on the old editor and 100 in the new. So. Network of masterlists.

Make a Choice!

Your favorite character is a mad scientist of the engineering subspecies. As a child, teenager, or sleep-deprived young adult, what random appliance have they taken apart and possibly set on fire in the course of trying to "improve it?" New and unanticipated sentience for the appliance optional.

Anti-plagiarism check! Pick your favorite citation format.

You can only pick one: Jokes about how white people don't know how to spice or season food. Jokes about how white people shotgun cinnamon the second September hits.

Is it vaguely dystopian for large elementary and secondary schools to have numbers instead of/before names? (e.g. the students of PS 91Q only know it by that code, not Richard Arkwright)

How long does a daily commute ROUND TRIP need to be to qualify as 'long'?

It is easier to change... your appearance OR your personality

When you see DSM-V, how do you pronounce it.

microwaving water for tea

Everyone Pick The Same Number

Writing and fandom polls!

Posting WIPs or unfinished works?

Best non-standard narrative format (that I've personally used)?

How well do you know omegaverse?

What does "it reads like bad fanfiction" mean to you, WHEN YOU SEE IT IN THE WILD, assuming no context?

What do you mean when YOU say "it reads like bad fanfiction," assuming no other context? (Unfortunately, typo messed it up)

Have you ever posted something Anonymously on AO3? (Not counting temporary anonymity for events.)

Tell me about your culture (and opinions on such)!

Did your school have you do a Mole project where, while learning what an atomic mole was, you took home a pattern and made a stuffed mole (animal)?

How close is your nearest grocery store? (Or farmer's market, fruit stand, butcher, etc. Food shop that is not a restaurant.)

Did you have to stand and recite a Pledge of Allegiance type thing to your country of residence in elementary school (and possibly beyond)

Taking off shoes on an airplane

Favorite elementary/middle school "everyone just learned a new body part" phrase

Did you know that bagels are a whole Thing and just as important to the New Yorker identity as pizza, if not more so?

Is "Whistling will bring mice into the house" a thing for you guys?

Do schools in your area do active shooter drills?

Does your culture/region have 'ants on a log' as a snack? (contains peanut butter brand discourse)

Do you do egg battles?

Tell me about yourself!

Think of your favorite band! Make sure it it is a band and not a solo artist. Now tell me the gender breakdown.

If you're trans, what's your preferred way to finish this sentence?

Pronounce "Sixth"

When you see the letter J in an unfamiliar word that you don't know the origin of, how do you pronounce it? (Assume you are reading a text in English.)

How important is the eco-friendliness fabric content to you when buying clothes?

What is your least favorite kind of makeup to put on?

Did you ever go to a big box store with your parents, get bored, and decide to take your blood pressure at the kiosk while you waited for them to finish?

A question for the pals who grew up bilingual: Have you ever had to translate from 'the language of the home country' to 'the language of where we live now' for your immigrant parents?

Last app you downloaded?

Can you reliably identify the various national blue/red/white tricolor stripe flags? (e.g. France, Russia, Netherlands, Serbia, and so on.)

Which of my "childish for someone over 21" traits are you?

Which syllable do you stress when saying Zagreb?

Do you ever heat up your milk* for cereal? - In defense of Panda Puffs

First grey hairs?

Ladies, where do you buy (most of) your undies?

How tempted are you pronounce processes (the plural of process, not the verb) as "PRO-seh-SEES" when you write it out?

Which New Doctor Who companion First Meeting™ career are you?

What are you willingly sacrificing DESPITE it being important* to you the next time you go to the hair salon/fuck it up in the bathroom?

What's your comfort/background noise show that you can rewatch indefinitely to turn off your brain a bit?

How often do you wash your bra?

How often do you change/wash your sheets?

Oh shit, the peanut butter you just opened is separated, and you need to mix the oil back in with the rest. How?

Mayonnaise

Nonsense!

let's make a bell curve!

But I am le tired... 🚬

I use an Android because

Blood on ya undies (funny phrasing)

If you're NEW to tumblr (like joined in the last two or three years), are you seeking out guides on how to engage with tumblr?

Without context, FTW stands for

Rocky Mountain Oysters

Is pilaf/pilav* a casserole?

Tag meme, not a poll: Who’s your fake late spouse?

[itsahotminuteinbetween]

Okay so I'm seeing a lot of 'Sun sucks at cooking he he can't make cereal properly leave the cooking to Moon he's the best at it' in domestic aus

And that's great! I love that idea! But consider the following: absolutely none of you know anything about cooking.

I mean, sure, Sun's been cutting apple slices with peanut butter for so long he's got it down to an art, and his PB &J sandwiches are to die for. Moon's got directions to make tea and applesauce and instant jello for the kids that they share in their headspace. But that's pretty much the limit for their cooking expertise. So put them near a toaster? Yeah, they can figure it out. A microwave? Moon put a fork in it to see what would happen after Sun saw something about it online and got to 20 seconds before you slam into the kitchen and shut it off. And then talk their audio receptors off by scolding them for putting metal in the microwave and being in the kitchen without your supervision.

All you have to send them is a look and they decide to leave the oven alone.

Speaking of your skills...

Well.

While you're no 'master chef', you've picked up enough to scrape by. A few years on your own will do that to you. Compared to what your boys know, you're practically a god in the kitchen.

So you, with your grand total of maybe 15-20 recipes (half of which have cottage cheese or yogurt incorporated into them) are appointed head of the kitchen.

You're really only slightly better than the boys, but you at least know how to turn on a stove. Still, your skill level is really only enough to make the same few meals throughout the week. So, you all decide to figure it out together.

You look up some recipes online, grab some stuff from the store and dump it all onto the counter. The ingredients are nothing you haven't seen before (the boys regard the flour as some foreign and ancient play-doh from the stone ages), but you can't remember the last time you bought some of this stuff.

After you take in the wonders of vanilla extract and brown sugar, you pick something hopefully easy enough that it'll be impossible to mess up. Cookies aren't that hard. You remember making them when you were younger, and they usually came out alright.

You also remember that you were 9 and had adult supervision to make sure you didn't screw up.

And now you're the most competent adult in this operation.

You try not to picture the apartment going down in flames.

It doesn't actually go terribly. You manage to handle it pretty well, all things considered. Moon grabs your wrist before you pour the eggs into the flour, reminding you that you're supposed to do your dries, then your wets, and then your chips. You're pretty sure he only reminded you so he can keep sneaking chips into his cheeks when you're not looking, but you let him have it. You also elect not to say anything when you catch them pouring more chips into the bowl when you're not looking.

Sun spends the entire time obsessing over the shape of the cookies, making sure they're all perfectly rounded and spread out on the pan. Moon wedges a chocolate chip deep into the center of a few of them, watching his brother panic over the now 'ruined' cookies. He gets over it eventually, though, joining his brother in front of the oven to watch the dough rise and expand as the torturous waiting for them to bake begins. You pull out the tray and inspect your work.

They're...not that bad, in all honesty. There are little things that could be improved, but otherwise, you're pretty proud of your guy's progress.

You're not as happy about the mess, though. It looks like a hurricane has stormed through your kitchen, a fact that is quickly brought to the attention of your boys as they scramble to wipe down countertops and toss eggshells away.

...

I dunno how to end this cuz my endings suck so there it is, thank you for attending my ted talk.

[0zzysaurus]

Marivert Marivert!! Tell me about ur Marivert hcs :>

Just the same ones as usual :]] I might throw out some cute flatmate au ideas/prompts/sillies tho:

- Marius covertly adopts a street cat, it sits on the wheelie bin outside the kitchen window and he feeds it ham. He wants to bring it inside but Javert said he hates pets and thinks they smell bad

- smash cut to six months later where Javert does his paperwork w the cat curled up in his lap because there isn’t a grumpy man on earth who said “no get that thing out of my fucking house” and didn’t then grow to love it like flesh and blood

- they often do not pay their bills on time and Marius will get woken up by furious yelling when Javert takes his morning shower and the boiler’s been disconnected

- neither of them can cook. Ready meals are their lifeline and the microwave is worshipped like an idol. And yet somehow Marius still finds a way at least once a month to put something explodable in it

- Javert will regularly direct Marius to the “appointments charter” (notebook with coffee stains that lives on the kitchen counter) to mark down house-guest requests. Sometimes Marius just wants the amis guys to come over !! (denied. They are criminals. Get better friends.)

- “Hey, your partner looks familiar… have I seen them somewhere before?”

- “Oh my god you have to let me know the next time he/she comes over because their dad/daughter CANNOT know about us” — cue elaborate setups to get Valjean or Cosette out the house without either of them realising what’s happening

- on the flip-side Valjean and Cosette both think to themselves “hey… it’s weird that his roommate is some random guy from the street that I’ve definitely seen give funny glances to my daughter/father in the past… what a weird coincidence…”

- 90% of the time they are arguing. 9% of the time they are chilling in the living room eating cereal out of the box and watching How It’s Made. 1% of the time they are rawing it from the back and trying not to gaze into each other’s eyes for too long

- Javert wants the Snoopy Moped fucking gone. Marius still has his L plates too. It’s so embarrassing please get rid of it. (Marius has the matching snoopy goggles helmet to go with it he’s keeping it for life)

- they are both the worst roommate ever. Javert is super meticulous and strict and demands that the house be respectable. Marius attracts mess wherever he goes, often forgets to do even basic housework, and is regularly making a fiasco of the place often by no fault of his own (he is still trying to convince Javert that it was Grantaire who spilled a pitcher of gin and coke on the Turkish carpet)

- the mug incident is still my favourite au prompt for them btw

[parttimesiffrinfulltimeproblem]

Hello tumblr user joshuamacheathfan do you want to microwave this boy with me (discuss him in a very hinged and normal fashion)

WAUUIGHJGHDJDBDMNGMNFN LOOK AT HIM ITS THE. THE ONLY GUY EVER

im putting greyson in a pan with olive oil garlic onion black pepper hes like a bowl of cereal to me my little guy.

PLEASE give me all your greyson thoughts and just scythe thoughts as a whole I mean look at him. type of guy to trip on his shoelaces. I LOVE HOW YOU DRAW HIM THERE IS SOMETHING SO WRONG WITH HIM SLASH POSITIVE he's just. goodness what a lad

[subtle-edge-of-rot]

This is formal permission to talk about your self indulgent domestic thoughts about Michael, I'll start.

I think that on top of having his drawer full of valuables he'll keep near everything you give him be it a cool rock or accessory or just something you thought he'd like. If it's a shirt you told him you like on him he'll wear it until it's tattered and has holes, adamant about wearing it to shreds because it's valuable to him.

He'll also read through all the past conversations you guys have had in his phone when he misses you while you're at work. He gets antsy, scrolling through weeks and weeks of I-love-yous to make himself feel better again. This is also around the time that you'll get a text from him checking up on you.

-💙

I promise I’ll answer your ask about Vincent soon I’m just fixated on Michael today because I cling to him in times of trouble. Welcome to Saturn retrograde hell!

Michael does keep pretty much everything you give him. He even keeps movie ticket stubs from trips to the movies with you. Any little thing that reminds him that you’re together and that you want to be around him and that you give him things. Even if it’s just a red rock that you found on the ground and thought of him because it’s his favorite color. As for telling him you like a shirt or his outfit? Why do you think he only wears grey sweatpants? 😏

He obsessively reads old texts because he misses you when you aren’t around. And he’ll text throughout the day. Memes and emojis and asking when you’ll be home tonight. Sometimes an awkward selfie where he holds the phone like a boomer. But it’s him and that alone makes you smile.

Other headcanons:

He alternates spending time between the bedroom and living room. He’s very lazy tbh, so he’ll lounge around in bed on his phone or lay around on the couch watching documentaries.

It’s really hard to keep him fed because he’s massive, so buying in bulk is the way to go. He makes frequent trips to the kitchen for snacks while you’re at work. So much cereal is consumed—it’s his favorite.

He used to be terrible about leaving dishes all over the house, but he started cleaning up after himself when he noticed how tired you were of picking up after him, especially after a long ass shift at work. So he’ll put his dishes in the dishwasher or at least rinse them off and put them in the sink.

Don’t ever let this man cook anything on the stove or in the oven. It’s all microwaveable foods for him unless you’re home. He’s an awful cook. But when you’re home he does like to help you chop things up.

He’s not a morning person. He wakes up grumpy and he just wants to stay in bed. But he still wants a goodbye kiss when you leave early for work.

He likes to pick your outfits out for you

I could keep going but this post would go on for eternity tbh

[fakeloveaskblog]

(Hi, me again. Awwwwwwwwww! I’m so happy for Remy. I’m glad their happy. Anyway here’s an ask for Virgil because it’s been a while since I’ve spoke to him.)

Hello Virgil, how are you? Did you miss me? How’s your cat?

Glow Eyes

"And what's this little beauties name?"

"Uh it's just Bela. Nothing cool"

"I think Bela sounds marvelous"

You floated into Virgil's apartment and was immediately hit by the smell. There wasn't any stench of rotten food left. It almost looked clean for the first time in months. Except for cat toys being scattered here and there.

A man you didn't know was hunching down in front of the tiny cat. His hair was long and parted into braids, same as his beard. He leant forward and dangled one of his braids so Bela could jump up on her back paws and play with his hair. His smile shone like the sun illuminating laugh lines next to his eyes.

Virgil sat beside the man with his eyes staring wide and with a nervous smile. His hair had started to grow a bit making bits of purple dyed hair fall down in front of his eyes.

Even so he turned to look at you almost as soon as you got into the room. He didn't say anything. He just got up and grabbed you by the back of your ghost neck and carried you out into the kitchen as if you were a misbehaving cat.

You only got a word out before he whispered "Hi to you too! Not right now though! B! U! S! Y! Bye Ghost!!"

He put you in the microwave and put it on half temperature before leaving the kitchen. You spun around in the microwave for a while before realizing he wouldn't be letting you out any time soon and even though you could easily phase through solid matter you, as the well mannered ghost you are, decided to leave and come back tomorrow instead.

--

When you returned the next morning Virgil was watching a ghost hunting show while eating cereal. He'd filled up Bela's bowl right before so they could breakfast together.

Finally you got to say your message. He rolled his eyes when you asked if he'd missed you before chuckling a little.

"Guess I'm doing fine....Some of the regulars at the park I go to with Bela have started trying to talk to me which is really nerve wrecking and annoying....but also nice I guess....Uhm he- The guy you saw yesterday wasn't from the park. He was just like he was- Why Am I even explaining this to you!? I'm a grown man. I can do whatever the hell I want"

He grabbed a pillow and was about to throw it at you, even though he knew it would just go through you. Before lowering his arm again because he remembered that Bela would probably get startled if he threw anything and he didn't want to see her scared.

"Don't worry I'm not planning on dating like annnyyyy time soon. We both agreed it was just a one night thing. I've already deleted his number and all that. And honestly" He was fiddling with the sleeves of his hoodie "I was really fucking anxious about just this. I really don't wanna hurt anyone again. I have never even considered dating again. Like...if it's not Remy I don't...I can't picture it in my mind. It just feels so wrong"

A loud gawking meow came from Bela as she climbed up on the sofa and started to jump to bite Virgil's finger. He patted her behind one of her big floofy ears before wagging his hand around to let her play.

She had gotten quite good at telling when her papa was feeling bad by now. She'd also gotten quite good at knowing that her papa would feel better again if she got his attention.

"Obviously I'm missing Remy like 24/7. Like so fucking much. But...I dunno how to explain...It's like...I'm not surprised that I'm still alive without them anymore y'know? It felt like if they were gone the sun would just stop rising and I would turn into fucking dust but it hasn't happened y'know?"

Bela started to gnaw at the sleeve of his hoodie. It already had a few holes because of her but Virgil didn't mind.

"I still can't imagine Not missing them but I could never imagine being with anyone but them either so" He pouted a little before sighing "Guess I have to hope for the future or whatever fucking shit balls fuck shit happens"

You felt a slight tug at your ghostly form as if someone was trying to summon you. It didn't feel like an emergency but you could smell the faint signs of something ratlike. It probably wouldn't be too bad if you wanted to stay with Virgil for a while but you could also go check it out.

[bisexual-ladyofchaous]

I’m here to partly complain, but also to remind myself (and you guys) that midterms are going to come then be over, and with that Christmas Break Starts. Don’t stress about it too much, study, and do the work. Do the projects, post-pone after school activities if need be. But once Christmas break starts, you do NOTHING. After Christmas breaks over, the third quarter begins, you work on the third quarter. Key word: After!

Over Christmas break, all you do is read, (pleasure) hang out with friends, or have fun. Use the Christmas break, okay?

Back to now; if this quarter your grades aren’t the best, that’s okay, if your failing, then you work your ass off this week, and study for those midterms. There is always a reason for that F, find the assignments you didn’t do well on, and revaluate it. Is your failing grade because of missing homework, or not doing well on tests and quizzes. If it’s homework, drop some after school activities or postpone them. Set up a schedule that absolutely ensures you can get your homework done.

Exam advice…

[Find out when your exams are, and what order they will be taking place. Time block your studying. If you know a subject well, don’t spend as much time on it then a subject you don’t know well.

Before studying for this years exams, turn off your cellphones and all distractions, disconnect your Tv, whatever just temporarily get rid of distractions.

Next get out all study material you could use! For ONE subject. Study for ONE thing at a time. Spend ONE hour studying a subject you sort of know.

After the hour (or other amount of time) is up, you take a practice test, have a classmate or family member quiz you.

If you don’t get all of the questions right, study the ones you didn’t for thirty minutes and have someone quiz you again. Repeat as needed.

After you are done with studying for that one subject, take a 10-15 minute break. Still no distractions, I recommend not using electronics or reading books at this time. Use it to take a quick walk, sip some tea, or whatever.

After your break is over study for the next subject. Repeat what was done above.

After you have completed studying for two subjects, I recommend that you stretch. Take a shower, brush your teeth, eat dinner, drink warm milk, water, or tea, or whatever, just don’t drink sugary drinks. You can have a few minutes to relax and read, still no electronics, and go to bed at a REASONABLE TIME.

But before you go to bed, prepare a bag for your day of exams. Pack at least 5 #2 pencils, and if you can a pencil sharpener. Also bring 2 erasers, bring scrap paper, you may need it. Bring study materials for your exams for that day with you. Also pack a very interesting book. Make sure that all of this is put in a bag neatly organized and easily accessible. Also bring your phone, fully charged, and a phone charger. If you need to, bring lunch. Make your lunch somewhat healthy, instead of a sandwich consider a salad wrap. It’s essentially a salad burrito. Or even fajitas! I don’t know how your going to heat it up, but that’s an option. Also, if your school requires a laptop, bring that with you, fully charged and with its charger. Also, bring headphones. For the sugar addicts, pack your gum/peppermints, make sure you have enough for the entire exams.

Wake up, get dressed, eat a nutritious breakfast, that’s balanced. (Sorry, but cereal is not part of a balanced breakfast) I recommend an omelette with cheese, bell peppers, mushrooms, and spinach, served with some avocado toast. If you don’t have time for this, don’t worry, there are plenty of other foods that are quick and easy to make. Also a great shortcut for avocado toast is buying freshly made guacamole, and putting that on the toast. Slightly faster. You can also make this the night before, and microwave it, or put it in the oven. Just don’t eat sugary foods like donuts, or those sugary muffins.

Then eat all of your breakfast. Drink your water, tea, or coffee, just again no friggin sugary drinks! If you are a sugar addict, don’t worry, while studying you may use gum or peppermint, so long as you save some for your exam.

Remember to leave your house early, and get to the exam room early. You might be wondering, how will I have time to eat that healthy breakfast and get there early?!!! I’m not asking you to get there an hour early, just between 30-10 minutes early.

In the 30-10 minutes you are in the exam room early, review what you studied, and continue until the teacher tells you that the exam is going to start.

At that point follow the teachers directions and do exactly as they say.

During the exam if you are unsure of how to answer a question (traditional exam) skip over it, and fill out the questions you do know, once you are finished with the ones you know, go do the ones you don’t. And if it’s to the point where you have to guess, rule out the answers that don’t make sense. Between the answers that you have left choose the appropriate one.

After you have completed answering your exam, double check to make sure all your answers align the correct way in the scantron, make sure you don’t lose any points due to misaligned bubbles.

Also for the sugar addicts, if you were chewing gum or eating peppermint, repeat this action during your exams if the teacher allows it.

If your exam is not a traditional one, and it’s a project, or even a Socratic seminar, I have something for y’all too.

If it’s a project, space out when you chose to work on it, always do some of it leading up to the due date. Have someone double check it, and give feedback. Correct project as needed.

If your exam is a Socratic Seminar, review the material you will be discussing. If it’s a book, find quotes that you could use, think of thought provoking questions, don’t ask how old or where did, ask questions that can go deep into a rabbit hole about morality giving you and everyone else a mental crisis. Don’t chew gum or eat peppermints on this one, okay? Make sure you keep track of the conversation, and find points you can relate it too. Agree or disagree with someone, support your ideas with evidence, or even relate the topic to real life or another piece of text. Compare and contrast! Don’t interrupt people and don’t be disrespectful.

Once your midterms for that day are over, do a time check. Do you actually have time to scroll on social media or watch Tv? And even if you do, are you really going to spend precious time on it.

Also once midterms for that day are over, double check to make sure no teachers have given you assignments to do. If they have, make a list of what you need to do, and then do them, depending on the due date. If you have a homework assignment due tomorrow, due that first, before studying. However if you have a small homework assignment due in two days, prioritize studying for midterms over it.]

Repeat all that has been mentioned above (in brackets) until midterms are over. Once your midterms are over and everything for this semester has been taken care of, you can finally turn back on your phone, and do pleasurable things, unless your teachers have assigned you a project to do over the break, in which case, you can still have fun, but spend time working on it each day, and stay away from social media, messages, games, and Tv, during the time you are working on the project!

Also if you still have a lot to worry about over the break, like shopping for Christmas presents, it’s okay, don’t stress about it, Christmas is supposed to be fun, if you need to shop for gifts go ahead and do that, but I recommend you go in person, and check out items there, sooner than later.

If you have finished everything needed to do over the Christmas break, that’s great! Now all you need to do, is just enjoy it. Hang out with friends and family, binge watch your favorite show, bake cookies, do whatever makes you happy.

By the way, over the break we are all going to go nuts with sugar, most likely, you can finally eat a bunch of sugar or unhealthy food and go into a food coma. But, if you are like me, and have to do athletic activity, please limit your sugar and continue to work out over the break.

[starlitangels]

Incorrect Quotes Part 7 (Redacted Edition)

Alexis: Sometimes I wish I looked more fragile and feminine like a dainty flower but I do enjoy looking like I hate everyone

•-•

Milo: I'll get over it, I just have to be dramatic first

•-•

Sam: My heart is guarded but like... very poorly. The kind of guards that would let 3 kids in a trench coat into an R-rated movie

•-•

Vega: Unfortunately for everybody I will keep doing whatever I want

•-•

Damien: How did none of you hear what I just said?

Lasko: I’ve been zoned out for the last two and a half hours

Huxley: I got distracted about halfway through

Freelancer: Ignoring you was a conscious decision

(alternately Davey, Milo, Asher, Darlin', in that order)

•-•

Darlin': I have a complicated relationship with sleep. By which I mean if I ever meet its god I can and will make them fear me so much they never come near me again

•-•

Baaabe: I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. The highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it apart to add power. This is not the Enterprise

Asher: >:(

•-•

Asher: What happens to nitrogen when the sun rises?

Asher: It becomes daytrogen

Babe: Good nitrogen

Milo: Sleep tightrogen

Angel: Don’t let the bed bugs biterogen

Davey: -_-

•-•

Avior: Jellyfish have existed without brains for 600,000 years

Avior: A ray of hope for Blake

(alternately, Asher joking about Christian, or Damien joking about Kody)

•-•

Blake: I'd like to offer my moral support, but I have questionable morals.

•-•

Gavin: We need to distract these guys

Freelancer: Leave it to me

Freelancer: *approaches group* Centaurs have six limbs and are therefore insects. Discuss

Damien, Lasko, and Huxley: *immediately start arguing*

Gavin: Oh. I don't like this. I don't like this at all

•-•

Milo: Fight me!

Asher: What are you gonna do shortstop, kick me in the shin?

*one minute later*

David, entering the room: Why is Asher on the ground holding his leg?

Babe, laughing: Milo kicked him really hard in the shin

•-•

Angel: Help! I told Davey I'd cook dinner tonight but I can't cook!

Asher, pouring milk directly into the cereal bag: And you thought I could help?

(alternately Darlin' instead of Asher)

•-•

Damien: *tapping lightly on table*

Lasko: *tapping back*

Huxley: What are they doing?

Freelancer: Morse Code

Damien: *slams his hands on the table* You take that back!

•-•

Freelancer: Have you ever seen something that changed your life?

Gavin: I saw you

Freelancer: Honestly that's so, so sweet, but it really makes this awkward because I was just gonna show you a picture Lasko sent of me of Damien as a turkey

•-•

Lasko: *sets down card* Ace of Spades

Huxley: *sets down Uno card* Draw Four

Freelancer: *places down Pokémon card* Jolteon, I choose you

Damien: What the hell are we playing?

•-•

Darlin’: Okay. Code names

Darlin’: I am Eagle One

Darlin’: Our target, Quinn, is “Been There, Done That”

Darlin’: Sam is “Currently Doing That”

Darlin’: Milo is “It Happened Once In a Dream”

Darlin’: Asher is “If I Had To Pick a Packmate”

Darlin’: David is Eagle Two

David: Oh thank God

•-•

Asher: Here's a list of suspects I've put together so far

Milo: Ash, your name is on this list

Asher: I don't remember where I was last Friday night, Milo. Therefore, I have no alibi. I've been tailing myself for the last three days

•-•

Gavin: FOUR MONTHS-

Damien: What's wrong with him?

Freelancer, suppressing giggles: It's nothing, really...

Gavin: THAT'S HOW LONG YOU STOOD BY AND WATCHED ME WATER A FAKE PLANT!

•-•

Aaron: Do you want to tell me how you crashed your car?

Ollie's Listener: Well, we were on our way to work and there was this deer in the road that I knew Ollie didn't see so I shouted, "Ollie, deer!"

Aaron:

Ollie's Listener: Do you want to tell him what your response was, Oliver?

Ollie: *sighs* "Yes, baby?"

•-•

Starlight: How long are we gonna stand here and just let him do that?

Avior: Just... give me a minute. This is the most fun I've had in years

Blake: *pushing a door that clearly says 'Pull'*

•-•

Gavin: Are you alright? You didn't sleep at all last night

Freelancer: I got a solid eight minutes

Freelancer: Not consecutively, but it's fine. You're not even that blurry

[21burritoseavey]

how do i tell you? (c.b.)

a/n: omg i am actually posting?? guys if this flops im literally quitting no joke....k i am joking lol but im really nervous to post for some reason. if you enjoyed please let me know!! and if you want a pt.2 let me know and you’ll be getting it in ten years hahaha (jk, but also not jk) btw sorry if this suckssss

summary:  you and corbyn are roommates, but recently your friendship hasn’t been the same, little do you know, it’s because he’d developed feelings for you.

it wasn’t as easy as he thought it would be. 

soft fingers of light casted golden streaks across the floorboards, rendering the apartment with the warm tinge of sunrise traveling through the drawn open windows. the whistling of the kettle started to subside just when your bedroom door opened, inviting corbyn to bow his head, his hoodie veiling his long frown, as if to hide his presence from you. 

It hurt more than he anticipated. not talking to you, or sending you silly messages or tiktoks he knew for certain would make you giggle, and as you slipped awkwardly past him, not receiving that sleepy morning hug. the wrap of your arms was nothing more than a platonic sign of endearment, but one that roused his familiar romantic feelings in the form of tingles along his limbs and a faster pulse that always made him anxious would give away his feelings for you as you’d rest your head against his chest. 

he was a coffee drinker, the taste of tea or matcha not quite eliciting that preferred level of satisfaction that coffee often gave him while the sun would ascend into the vast expanse of the artsy sky. but more importantly, he was a creature of habit, a roommate whose love was shown in the hot steam of his daily homemade cup of tea for you. the ratio of tea to milk and sugar was ingrained in his mind after watching you make it for so long. and when he would breeze around the kitchen preparing his coffee, he’d put the teapot on the stove so that when it was your turn to saunter into the kitchen, bleary eyed with that soft half smile of yours to greet him, a cup of tea would greet you too. 

but this morning, among the previous tortuous days he had avoided you, he let the water get cold, forcing his eyes away from your favourite mug in the cabinet you two always argued over, the words ‘it’s mine’ sprung back and forth since that first day you two had moved in together regardless of the fact you had both secretly forgot who it actually belonged to. he always let you win those arguments, chuckling at the playful smirk on your face as you would drop in a tea bag infront of him. 

corbyn dragged his feet to the coffee machine, opening the lid to place in his pod of premade coffee. there wasn’t a word spoken in the kitchen for a while, the air merely blessed with the freshness of early morning but not your typical easy morning greetings and complaints about the cold atmosphere thanks to winter’s arrival. you were wearing your robe, and its soft material billowed out behind your figure as you poured cereal from an open box into a bowl, grabbed a spoon and shuffled onto a seat behind the island. 

the apartment was calm, or so it must’ve seemed like that from an outside perspective, but in reality, corbyn could feel his heart pounding in his chest as he leaned against the edge of the cool countertop, staring at the continuous drips of coffee into his cup under the dispenser. still, no words were spoken. this wasn’t atypical for you two. having spent so many hours hanging out together, sometimes the most comfortable option was to be in silence together, in one another’s company. but this is different, nothing like the peace of each other's quiet presence. corbyn’s uneasiness grew, and he felt your eyes leering on him though his back was turned and the gruelling shadow of guilt looming over him increasing with every slow minute that passed from the bright digital time on the microwave. nothing about that is peaceful. 

as cliché as it sounded, he always thought there weren’t enough words in the English language to explain his feelings, and he often wondered if spoken words were even the right way to explain them. although he hated to admit it, it wasn’t possible to resolve whatever was going on between you two without spilling his truth. or better said, the lack of anything going on between you two. all he was certain of was that he missed his best friend.

it wasn’t like an episode of a t.v. show you had both caught up on; a statement you simply skim over in conversation. it was a weight getting heavier and heavier upon his shoulders; drifting through life and pushing away his feelings for you. communication between the both of you had withered to an awkward tension, save for some of those quiet ‘thank you’s’ you’d mutter when he’d help you with something like the stiff lid of a jar, or an occasional ‘can you please pass the milk?’ 

corbyn glanced over his shoulder, and with a slight nod, he merely slid the carton of milk across the counter. his movements were slow, painfully slow, as if avoiding you wasn’t enough torture, and he has to now irk you with the annoying sight of the milk carton moving along the countertop at a sluggish pace. 

you clicked your tongue in irritation, leaning over to snatch it from his grasp before it reached your side, “thanks.” the edge in your voice didn’t go unnoticed, and it caused the corners of corbyn’s mouth to twitch further down, if that was even possible. 

he noticed the weekly paper in front of you too, the pages messily folded in your enthusiastic haste to complete the crossword and eyes narrowed in adorable concentration. he hated how much he loved the sight of you in the morning, untouched hair remaining in its messy state, comfy panamas still worn. and with the yellowy light of the sun illuminating your shared home, your beautiful eyes were left with the obscure sparkle he never failed to notice, like a hidden pot of treasure buried in a deep ocean. 

you were truly a sight for sore eyes, though unfortunately, one that landed him in an awkward, almost mortifying moment. 

you shovelled another spoonful of cereal into your mouth and between loud crunches, the words, “you’re staring,” slipped past your tongue, and you thank the stars for the fact that corbyn couldn’t sense the butterflies fluttering in your stomach or feel the heat in your face fluctuating from across the kitchen.

taglist: @chilling-seavey @marthagryffindor @randomlimelightxxx @hiya-its-amber @the-girl-who-cried-wolf @hackerXavery @jonahlovescoffee @onlyangelavery @sadbitchfangirl @wiildflower-xxx @nichmeddar  @unitersmoonshine  @sbrewer21 @comatosedheart  @kaitieskidmore1  @maxence-et-musique

join my taglist!

[dustofbrokenheart]

The Lost Boys: Grocery List

Dwayne x Reader

Word Count: 1,100

Summary: Reader takes Dwayne to a late night run to the store. 

While grocery shopping was technically a chore, you found that you didn’t mind it too much. Not compared to other things on your to-do list.

That particular trip to the store wasn’t a huge haul either; you just needed ingredients to make something for an upcoming potluck and decided to pick up some other treats since you were already there.

Sure, sometimes people would try to make uncomfortable conversation with you, but getting food was worth it. 

Besides, now that you had Dwayne to accompany you, he kept most of the real weirdos away from you. And there were plenty of weirdos at the grocery mart after dark.

You heard a tearing sound and saw Dwayne reaching into an opened box of cereal.

Weirdos which evidently included him.

He grunted in betrayal when you gave him a well place jab to the ribs. “Don’t open things, you goob. Now I have to buy it.”

“Oh.” Rolling up the bag, he pushed it down into the cereal box and set it back on the shelf.

You sighed and put it in your cart. “Unfortunately, that’s not how it works.”

Knowing Dwayne, he was probably about to critique the system. Something like ‘the capitalist system that the grocery chain operated in was already stealing from you, profits won’t miss one box of cereal.’

Sure enough, he cracked his neck, a tell that he was about to get on his soap box. “You know, the system already steals—”

“Sounds great, big guy, but I’m still paying for it.”  He watched the box with a pout as you made your way down the aisle.

You tried to give him something to do to keep him occupied. “Here.” You scribbled a few things on the back of a coupon. “Can you go get these for me? It’ll go faster if we team up.”

Taking the list from you, he scanned it and gave you a single finger gun. 

Laughing under your breath as he wandered off, you went back to scanning the shelves, hoping they had the brand you wanted in stock.

In a flash, you had your part of the shopping finished. Perks to expertly knowing where everything in the store was located as a long-time shopper. But you hadn’t seen Dwayne in a while started making the rounds to find him.

One of the wheels on the cart was super squeaky and out of rhythm compared to the rest, which you noticed a lot more when you weren’t focused on groceries. You tried every trick you knew to keep it quiet but the wheel just would not be silenced.

In the end, it was him who found you. “I heard the cart from a few aisles over.”

It made no sense to be embarrassed for the poor cart, but you were. “Sorry. Guess I chose the problematic one today.”

“Not a big deal,” he shrugged. The he dumped all of the stuff he had been carrying in his arms into the cart, making a loud racket.

Confused as to why he had so much stuff, you looked everything over. “Hot Pockets, Twinkies, squeeze cheese…” you muttered. And that was just the start—there was tons of box and packages that weren’t on his list.

He tried to defend himself. “We ran out of Twinkies yesterday at the cave and this flavor of Hot Pockets sounds good. I think they boys will love ‘em.”

“…” Did he really miss the instructions on the back of the box? “But you don’t even have a microwave to cook them in.”

He blinked, like he was just now realizing it. “Umm… I guess we could roast them over the barrels?”

“Huh. That might actually—hey wait, no. I’m getting off track here. Dwayne. I didn’t tell you to get most of this.”

“No,” he agreed, “It all sounds tasty though.”

You patted his shoulder in consolation. “Sorry, big guy. You have to put them back.”

But Dwayne knew you well, meaning that he knew how best to convince you. 

He placed his hands on your hips, thumbs reaching under your shirt just enough to rub tiny circles on your bare skin. His forehead rested against yours, so that you almost went crossed eyed staring into his big, brown eyes.

“Please,” he petitioned, giving you a little kiss.

You were wavering for sure and when he noticed, he amped it up a notch.

He managed to roll his shoulders in such a way that his jacket slid off one of them, exposing his toned arm in addition to the skin that was already showing on his chest. The muscles on display, his low voice, the big eyes…you were a goner.

“Fine. But you can only keep five of them! The rest have to stay for next time.”

Smiling victoriously, he kissed you again. Then he was rummaging through the cart, choosing what would go and what would stay.

Squeeze cheese didn’t make the cut, but the Twinkies and Hot Pockets were still there, along with a tray of baked cinnamon rolls and a canister of Flintstone’s gummies. The last one made you raise a brow.

“For Laddie. He likes the taste and vitamins are good for a growing boy.”

You were a little iffy on whether Laddie was still growing, being half-vampire and all, but didn’t bring it up. The fact that he was so close with the boy always made you soft.

“To the register,” you pointed dramatically. Dwayne saluted and got a running start with the shopping cart, jumping up to ride it once it was going fast enough.

Luckily, the cashier didn’t make a big deal out of the silliness. “Did you find everything okay?”

“Yep,” you said. Digging for the twenty you stashed in your wallet before coming to the grocery mart, you felt Dwayne glue himself to your back.

You were too busy with the cashier though.

“Do you want a receipt?” they asked with a smile.

“Sure.” The last syllable came out as a squeak. Dwayne had nuzzled your ear.

“I can’t believe you did that in front of the poor cashier,” you admonished while putting the groceries in the trunk of your car.

“They were checking you out.”

“It’s their job.” Really, why would that set him off?

He stared meaningfully. “No, checking you out.” Oh. “But don’t worry—between hugging you and swiping some licorice, I feel a little more forgiving.” 

Indeed, he pulled out a pack of black licorice that you hadn’t even seen him grab, and started munching happily.

You sighed. What a goob.

_______________

Today was a Dwayne kind of day. I haven’t written him in so long, I missed him! Hope all the fellow Dwayne lovers out there enjoyed. Happy October! 

[leaving-grapefruitss]

A3! Instant Noodles Headcannons 

Because the responses to my cereal hcs prompted me to make another 

Oh boy let’s go, I guess

Makes noodles on the stove:

Omi

Yuki

Tsuzuru

Sakyo (“iF yOu’Re gONna Do iT, Do It RigHT” 🙄🤚ok Mr Michelin-Star chef)

Tsumugi

Homare

Guy

Sakuya

Chikage

Muku

Misumi (wants to shape the noodles into a triangle 🥺)

Makes noodles in the microwave:

Kumon

Kazunari 

Azami

Banri

Juza

Itaru (Chikage hits him with a chilli pepper [💀] for being lazy)

Citron 

Matsukawa (burns the noodles and the microwave)

Kamekichi…? (Who taught the bird how to use the microwave?)

Tasuku

Azuma

Hisoka 

Taichi

Tenma (does not know how to use a microwave. Tries anyways)

Can I just add: just because I listed so many members doing this does not mean that I do 💀 

Boils just the water and seasoning and forgets to add in the noodles:

Kazunari (is the type of person to accidentally use paint water as broth. I have as many questions as you do)

Tenma 

Taichi

Kumon

Tsuzuru

Itaru 

Misumi

Tasuku

Banri (💕no surprise there 🥰)

Juza (the Hyobros represent my last two braincells at 2am) 

Homare (don’t ask questions you don’t want the answers to)

Hisoka (“accidentally” boiled marshmallows)

“Stir fries” the instant noodles:

Omi (why tho)

Tsuzuru (mmm coOking)

Itaru (mmm coOking part two)

Tsumugi (thinks it’s valid)

Masumi 

Guy (💀???)

Chikage

Dips raw noodles in seasoning and eats them as a “snack”:

Tenma

Itaru

Tsuzuru (...he’s supposed to be normal, huh?)

Citron

Taichi

Muku (…? Baby why?)

Kumon

Kazunari

Misumi

Eats raw noodles and drinks water and mixes it around in their mouth like an absolute heathen: 

Taichi

Chikage (did it on a dare. Will do it again to see the look of horror on Itaru’s face)

Tsuzuru (sleep-deprived as heck)

Kazunari (“yO bRo, lOoK AT tHIs cOOl TRIck! FiLm ME cUz I WaNNa PuT iT oN tHE ‘bLaM!” 😔 Kazu why)

Misumi (films Kazu trying it. Tries it for himself later on)

Thinks that adding instant noodle seasoning to pasta is valid (Omi’s sobbing rn): 

Tenma (he’s showing up too often 🤨)

Taichi

Kumon

Tasuku

Itaru

Chikage (likes the pot ramen curry seasoning)

Citron

Sakyo

Banri

Juza

Crushes up the noodles and turns it into pizza dough (like that one five minute craft):

Misumi (TRIANGLE PIZZA!!)

Omi

Tsuzuru

Itaru (work smarter, not harder)

Chikage (“improvise, adapt, overcome” idk some guy on TikTok said the phrase whilst cooking and it stuck. Reminds me of our resident cabbage)

Sakuya

Kumon

Guy

Taichi 

Kazunari (”yUh PiZzA nItE w DA bOiZ 😚 ✌️”)

Banri (”who needs takeout?” itaru, apparently) 

Tsumugi (adds an egg smack in the middle)

Doesn’t eat instant noodles:

Azami (“iT cAn’T BE gOod fOr YoUr SkIn-“ 🙄 🤏)

Sakyo (says the man who probably lived off them during his twenties 😒) 

Tasuku (eats them when he has to but he doesn’t like them)

Guy (didn’t eat them until he was introduced to different flavours)

Hisoka (rarely eats them. “They don’t have marshmallows-“ no kidding 🤨)

Lives solely off instant ramen to the point of concern for sodium poisoning:

Itaru (is anybody surprised)

Tsuzuru (does it intentionally)

Azuma (does not like cooking period)

Masumi 

Hisoka (…adds marshmallows?)

Adds sugar and milk to “mAkE iT a DeSsERt”: 

Muku (tries to state that they’re good-)

Tsuzuru (collegecore) 

Kazunari (mmm dessert 👍) 

Juza (adds flan. this should be criminal)

Hisoka (we already know he’s adding marshmallows and marshmallow fluff. Dammit Homare, why’d you introduce him to marshmallow fluff again?)

Misumi

Taichi 

Makes instant ramen and substitutes it as rice in curry:

Matsukawa (…boi-)

Chikage (uses curry flavoured ramen 💀)

Omi (~eXpErIMeNtiNG~)

Tsuzuru (what a chef, honestly)

Taichi

Azami 

Banri (“Rice takes time, bro,” 👏 use a rice cooker 👏) 

Somehow turns packet ramen into a full 5 star meal:

Omi (who’s surprised?)

Guy (doesn’t understand the concept of “instant” noodles)

Kazunari (I’m still surprised that he can cook)

Tsuzuru (adds lettuce 👍) 

This took a lot longer than it should’ve, I’ll be honest. I also gave up on making this feasible halfway through so there’s that.

Fuyu sick day HCs should be up within today or tomorrow? Idk I’ve been sick recently so I’m tryna transmit my own mood into my HCs

[scattered-winter]

batkids as things my siblings and I have done part 2

because y'all liked the other one and because my siblings and I are the harbingers of chaos incarnate

(part 1)

-------

Dick, Tim, Duke, and Steph: drew airbender tattoos in marker all over faces and arms and proudly showed Bruce when he got home

-----

Duke: built a fort out of pillows and blankets and refused to leave for 2 days

-------

Cass: made MIIs (from the WII) of everyone in the family except they all had mustaches

-------

Dick, Damian, Cass, Duke, and Tim: stayed up all night watching Star Wars and fell asleep in a giant cuddle pile

---------

Jason: *charging up the stairs* "I WANT A GRILLED CHEESE SANDWICH!!!!!!"

--------

Steph: "hey can I drive?"

*immediate chorus of groans*

---------

Jason and Duke: made cookies at midnight

--------

Steph: almost burned the house down because she put tinfoil in the microwave

--------

Everyone: *playing tag*

Dick: climbing out windows, vaulting over fences, hiding in window wells, climbing onto the roof to jump down on people, etc

--------

Steph: painted the neighbor’s tree while everyone else stained the fence

------

Damian: spent 3 hours drawing an elaborate charcoal-and-pencil rendition of the “disturbed Tom” meme

--------

Everyone: ordered pizza and scared the pizza guy when he came because they were so loud

--------

Duke, Tim, and Cass: watching Wipeout in a hotel room and judging the dives as people fell into the water

---------

Jason, Damian, Dick, and Steph: watching American Ninja Warrior and saying “I could do that” every time someone did anything

-------

Damian: put the dog on the trampoline while everyone was sleeping on it and watched the chaos ensue

-------

Dick, Jason, Tim, and Steph: played a game where they would put everyone’s shoes on the trampoline and jump around and try to avoid them. Tim got hit in the face with a steel-toed boot, Steph had red marks on her arm from a flip-flop Jason threw at her (he got disqualified) and Dick would belly flop on top of all the shoes and send them flying in all directions just to mess everyone else up

--------

Everyone: screamed “duck” every time a car drove past the yard, and everyone would immediately dive to the ground, no matter what they were doing at the time

Dick, carrying trays of food for roasting hot dogs:

Tim: D U C K !

Dick: *drops all the trays and dives to the ground*

Bruce: *long, tired sigh*

------

Duke, Steph, Cass, and Damian: rolling down the hill and chasing each other while still being dizzy

-------

Jason: sneezed in Tim’s oatmeal (on purpose)

-------

Steph: peed in Dick’s cereal (on accident)

------

Steph and Cass: switched clothes for a day and waited for someone to notice

------

Damian and Jason: made an elaborate and complicated handshake and performed it at the most inappropriate settings (funerals, weddings, church, school assemblies, etc etc)

---------

Dick: “our Uncle Tom just passed away”

Jason: “it’s ABOUT TIME! He was like A HUNDRED!”

-------

Duke: *answers phone* “hello yes you’ve reached the house of the criminally underrated, where can I direct your call?”

-------

Cass: *answers phone in a creepy voice* “do you know where my eyes went?”

-------

Dick: *driving and sees a road work sign* “road work ahead?”

Everyone, immediately: “UH YEAH I SURE HOPE IT DOES”

-------

Jason: shoved Damian into a cupboard and wouldn’t let him out

-------

Dick: I just think I’m amazing

Tim: *snorts*

-------

Steph: blasted All Star and ran around the manor with her face painted like Shrek

--------

Tim: screaming “WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY SWAMP” every time someone walked into his room

------

Cass and Duke: made a wreath out of golf balls and goose feathers and gave it to Alfred, who proceeded to proudly display it on the grill of his car

------

Steph: attempted to make popcorn Once (1) and is now banned from the kitchen

--------

Damian: *leans over to smell bread baking in the oven* MMM FLESH

--------

Dick: played exclusively meme songs on the piano for months

---------

Tim: blasted a trombone at 1 am and got grounded from touching another musical instrument for 2 weeks

-----

*at school*

Tim: hey

Jason: what the hell do you want

------

Jason: locked the truck doors and started to drive away without Dick

Dick: jumped in the truck bed while screaming "DAD'S GONNA GROUND YOU!"

Jason: "NO HE WON'T FUCK YOU!"

------

Tim: *gets hit in the face* OW

Damian: *awkward pat* It's all right to cry. Let it out.

Tim: *loud obnoxious sobbing*

Damian:

Damian: ok put it back in

------

and now for some things we’ve done at Halloween in honor of Spooktober Season.......

Damian: dressed up as a caveman and dressed the dog up as a triceratops and went trick-or-treating together

Everyone Except Damian (because he was a caveman): dressed up as characters from Lord of the Rings

Dick: Legolas

Jason: Aragorn

Steph: Gimli

Cass: Boromir

Duke: Gandalf

Tim: Frodo

Duke (another year): sat out on the porch dressed like a puppet and holding the bowl of candy. Every time someone tried to get some he scared them

------

Jason: spray painted the grass red

Dick: "don't do that, it's too violent"

Jason: "no it's perfect"

------

Damian: spent 3 hours making spiderweb decorations out of white yarn

Dick and Tim: sat inside with a huge bowl of candy watching horror movies instead of trick-or-treating

Steph and Cass: dressed up as Grim Reapers and ran at people screeching

[cabinofimagines]

can i request a poly! lercy fic where percy doesn't know(or completely forgets) that aluminum foil shouldn't go in the microwave, y/n doesn't pay any mind to it cause they don't realize it's not supposed to be microwaved, and then all hell breaks loose, so leo comes home to a basically melted microwave and percy & y/n rubbing burn cream on each other while they're murmuring stuff like 'why does it hurt so much!' 'you'd think with leo, we'd be used to it by now.' thank you!

Everyone SHUT UP I have to give you some Leo appreciation after the angsty shit Asja wrote -Danny

Sleep Deprived —(Poly!Lercy xGN!reader)

“I’m so tired I just want to fall flat on the bed and sleep for the next week,” Percy grumbles beside you.

It was the end of the semester of your first year in college, both of you were basically dead inside with the amount of nights spent finishing assignments and studying for tests. 

You’re focused on finishing your bowl of cereal while Percy opens a box of something, you weren’t paying enough attention to see what he was about to put in the microwave.

“I can’t remember the last time I actually felt well rested,” You mumble. 

“Makes you wonder how Leo can keep up with his schedule without fallin apart, huh?” The soft sound of the microwaves’ buttons accompany his comment.

“Probably his ADHD, I don’t understand why you’re falling apart though,” You raise a brow.

“Well, I’m not a son of Hephaestus—”

“Which is great, otherwise you and Leo dating would be gross as fuck—”

“So probably my brain function on a different level than Leo’s...”

“Everyone’s brain works on a different level than Leo’s,” You yawn. “He’s so freaking smart—that bastard.”

Percy presses the start button, almost immediately something starts hissing inside the machine and a loud bang sends you out of your chair. When you stand up the microwave is in flames and Percy has a very ugly burn on his arm.

“What the fuck—!”

You circle the counter and look around for the fire extinguiser, once you find it you push Percy out of the way and unlock the tool, showering the machine with its white substance.

“What the hell did you put in there, Percy?” You ask in shock.

“I-It was a burrito! You know, from the ones Leo bought yesterday?”

“Did you make sure to take off the foil before putting it in there?”

Percy blinks, he lowers his gaze to the messed up microwave and a grimace quickly forms on his features. 

“I’m sorry, Y/N, I wasn’t paying attention...”

“Don’t apologize, you’re the one who got hurt!” You shake your head. “Where’s the ointment?”

“Gotta be under the sink,” Percy hisses when trying to touch his burned arm. “You know, it’s sort of insulting, as the son of Poseidon, to get burned by an inanimated object that I own.”

The front door swungs open to reveal one happy Leo Valdez, he’s humming whatever song he’s listening through his earphones, he hasn’t noticed the mess in the kitchen since his back is turned to his boyfriend but the smell is so strong he notices after five seconds.

“Hey, what are you cooking?” He scrunches up his nose. “Guys?”

Leo sees Percy’s injured arm and he messily drops his backpack on the entrance before rushing over to him.

“What happened?” He looks at the kitchen and his frown deepens. “Did you fight with our microwave?”

“I put a burriton in it without taking the stupid foil,” Percy groans.

You walk into the room once more holding a small tube of ointment. 

“Don’t move, I’ve got you—Oh, hi Leo!”

You kiss him shortly before starting to rub the cream on Percy’s forearm. 

“How was work?”

“Fun. But not as crazy as whatever the hell just happened in here five minutes ago,” He leans back against the counter. “Do I have to set up cameras inside the house to make sure you don’t kill yourselves on accident? This is like the third fire you guys start this week!”

“We’re just a little tired.”

“A little?” Leo asks teasingly.

“You should be kissing the pain away from my body instead of making fun of us!” Percy demands. “If you got no useful advice then please leave the room so Y/N can take care of me.”

“You’re a spoiled child,” You reply, although your tone is sweet.

“Hey, I never said that!” Leo pouts, he quickly pushes you aside playfully and plants a firm kiss on Percy’s lips. 

The older boy smirks against Leo’s mouth and happily reciprocates. You finish your work on Percy’s arm and put the ointment away, looking at the microwave with a tired expression.

“First the coffee maker, now this,” You sigh. “We have no money to buy a new one, what are we going to do?”

“I could ask my dad to build us one,” Leo offers, he moves away from Percy and ignores his complaint. 

“Isn’t he busy with—dunno, God stuff?”

“I’m sure it’ll take him like five minutes to make one, and I bet it’ll be cooler than any of those mortal versions.”

“Okay, you sure can try to convince him,” You snort. “In the meantime, we should keep Percy away from the kitchen until he finishes finals week.”

“I would fight against it, but I honestly don’t trust myself now,” Percy replies, his weariness slowly coming back to his body. “I’m still hungry though...”

“Oh, I brought you doughnuts!” Leo grins. “They’re in my backpack, you can take the bag if you want.”

“I love you so much,” Percy sighs in bliss, standing up and walking directly to the backack Leo has abandoned at the front door.

“Love you too,” Leo beams, his head turns to the side as he sees you clean the mess your boyfriend caused without meaning to. “And we also love you, Y/N. Thank you for looking after Mr Trainwreck.”

“It’s my pleasure,” You grin.

Leo opens his arms and silently waits for you to get closer, you don’t keep him waiting for long.

Taglist.

@beneaththeiceandsnow @lovinghufflepuffgirl @diaphragmjellyfish 

[flamingredanon]

(I was inspired by your artwork of Terrence's cereal on fire to create a few scenarios. Terrence has Pyrokinesis)

Wilford: so I was talkin to randy the other day about Terrence's fire powers and how they aren't a joke-

*massive explosion outside*

Wilford runs outside: "The fuck is going on out 'ere?!"

Randy, Terrence and other near by toppats are covered in ash and burnt debris.

Randy: Terrence accidentally set a crate of dynamite on fire! It was super rad!

Terrence: *quiet embarrassed sobs*

---

Terrence causally opening the microwave to put a bowl of soup in. The microwave combusts into flames.

Terence: AW SHIT- FUCK! R-RANDY AHH! HELP! THE MICROWAVES ON FIRE!

randy watching from the couch: "now that's an efficient microwave..."

Wilford running in with an extinguisher: "GOD DAMN IT THATS THE 5TH MICROWAVE THIS MONTH!"

---

Terence: *sigh* you think this birthday card for Randy looks good? I think I wrote enough in it...

Reginald: hmmmm.. let me have a look.

Terence goes to hand Reginald the card but before it leaves his hand it combusts in flames.

Reginald: ...

Terence: ...

Terence: I'll um... *Fire alarm starts* get a new one...

----

Terence: aghh! I swear to fucking God if another thing sets on fire!-

Wilford: Terry calm down. Ya know emotions make it worse.

Terence: *sigh* I know I know... I just- first I nearly exploded the storage bay area, then I set the microwave on fire AGAIN, then I burnt Randy's card and.... I don't know how much of this I can take wil...

Wilford: Terry it's fine. Everyone knows of your ability and not to judge it. Everything that happens with it are accidents, so don't go blamin yourself for everything it does.

Terence: your right...

Wilford: yeah I am! How bout you go take a shower to relax? We can watch a movie after wards!

Terence: yeah ok! I'll do just that! Thanks Wilford, your the best-

*cut to Wilford and Terrence outside their house, that is burning down*

Terrence: ...

Wilford: ...

Randy strolls up: "man! I didn't know you guys were so hot enough to burn the house down!"

Wilford: RANDY FOR FUCK SAKE!

Wilford: Terrence didn't even cause that one and do you have a thing for fire?

Randy: Well you two are smoking hot.

Wilford: ...

Terrence: How long have you been waiting to...

Randy: Let's just say awhile because I am terrible at flirting.

Terrence: We will talk later, right now though, I have to get this fire under control the best I can before the fire department gets here.

Wilford: I am letting Terrence choose the next house. Because I am sure sixties themed houses faded for a reason.

Randy: No shag?

Wilford: Randy you are our good friend and all but housing isn't your thing at all.