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batrogers · 6 months

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Linked Universe Time with PTSD

My friends have gotten the brunt of me going on these rambles at them directly, so I decided I’d make this everyone else’s problem as well. Especially after the recent update and the somewhat... questionable words exchanged between him and Twilight, I figured this could be a salve for people like me and a few friends going “What the fuck” about how out of the blue it feels.

A comment on my approach to canon: I am aware there are things shared in the Discord that are creator content, and on the Patreon to which not everyone has equal access or can even manage to relocate again with any ease. As such, like I do with most fandoms, I will be discounting those as “extra-canon” only referenced to augment the “core materials” which I am treating as the Tumblr account archive, because that is available to everyone, without an account and without paying.

I am, of course, including all base canon of the games in this analysis as well, which is to say all the canon directly included in the games and not including the Ocarina of Time or Twilight Princess comics. Interviews and so on are considered "extra-canon" here as well.

(Also I am in the Patreon and at the moment none of the “bonus” content is relevant to this anyways, for the curious. I am not, and have never been, in the Discord.)

Approx 1500 words.

IIII

I’m going to start from the comment everyone is making about this update: that Malon must be pregnant. Obviously nothing can prove or disprove that in and of itself, but I would argue that’s both not a necessary read of this and the mere question is actually part of my analysis: Link and Malon are, by word of god and how they’re drawn, in their thirties. They’ve been a couple since they were late teens to early twenties, and they very clearly want to have children from how they react to Twilight!

So why don’t they?

Infertility is suspected after two years of a (presumably) reproductive capable couple having unprotected sex without a pregnancy. If Time and Malon have been trying for ten to twenty years to have children (assuming their relationship started between 15-20, and currently are 30-35), they are incredibly infertile. It’s not out of the question, and a wild stroke of luck could still occur (my own cousin conceived unexpectedly after ten years of trying) but it does serve to investigate other reasons: maybe they had some reason they weren’t trying, either on purpose or because something was keeping them apart.

Something, perhaps, like a war.

The base game of Ocarina of Time does not leave Hyrule in a good state. We are told, in-game, that Hyrule was in a civil war when Link was a baby. His mother died getting him into the Lost Woods, where he was raised as an orphan. The Shadow Temple explicitly states it was used to imprison (and, strongly implied, torture) the enemies of the Hylian royal family. Ocarina of Time is the only game to use its unique script for Hylian, which suggests it wasn’t the original language and did not last into Twilight Princess later on.

Lon Lon Ranch itself is both very protected by location (very close to the Castle, close enough it supplies it with food and other supplies) and by a twelve foot log palisade. The castle grounds themselves have two guarded gates between it and Castletown (do they not trust their own populace?) and a vast number of guards on the hills around it. Kakariko also has guarded, gated entrances.

(This all has a game mechanics explanation, of course. Closing off each section with “gates” and high walls permits loading screens to feel justified and more immersive, and saves game data and space. It creates clearly defined, restricted areas for the console capabilities at the time. But they can still be interpreted this way, because that is ultimately still the world they built in the end.)

In addition to that base of implied precarious stability at home, we have the question of how the matter of Ganondorf was resolved. Time very briefly references pointing the finger at him and causing something to happen, but ultimately there is no result that would not have made the situation politically volatile for some time after. Even if they executed Ganondorf immediately, the bad blood between Hyrule and the Gerudo would’ve festered under Koume and Kotake as potential leaders. If they didn’t, and simply threw him out or banished him, the same would apply this time with Ganondorf still alive... and, if we assume that the Twilight Princess Ganondorf and this one are the same, he looks much older in-model than he does in Ocarian of Time which suggests this interpretation holds more weight.

It’s not really a question of “if” things devolved again after these events, but when and how badly. Remember, again, my comment that the script of Ocarina of Time is gone by the time of Twilight Princess. In addition, I've done an analysis of Twilight Princess game implications that do not imply Child Timeline has been peaceful, either.

But, of course, the question of what the games themselves leave us with doesn’t answer if Jojo went with this position within the canon of the comics. There is of course the potential to disregard this if someone doesn’t want to go the route of war post-game for Ocarina of Time. Many people just don’t want to write it, and that’s valid! I honestly don’t think Jojo really considered it.

But, there is evidence that could support it if you wanted to go there.

First of all, we have Time’s platemail. This is based off of the Hero’s Shade platemail in Twilight Princess. Disregarding all other factors, platemail directly implies a few things about Time’s social position at the start of Linked Universe: he has enough money, influence, and reason to have suffered the cost and length of time required to make what is extremely high-level, personalized (in size and design) armour. This means several things:

Time has social status. That armour is meant to be seen and noticed; it’s something that either was made for show (a “jewel of the crown” level of regard), or because he wanted people to notice it personally. He has money, or political favour: that shit’s expensive. He either paid for it himself, or someone paid for it for him. And he has cause to want the level of defense offered by platemail over chainmail or hardened leather. Platemail is uncomfortable. It's heavy, and reduces agility. You wear plate because you expect to get hit, and hit hard by something that could surpass chainmail or hardened leather. Something like a moblin... or an iron knuckle.

Malon directly references this in their visit to see her: “You’re in danger if you took your best gear.”

Time chose to wear his platemail to go after Dink, but this is armour he already owns before Dink ever entered the picture. In that same chapter, Malon directly states “all the times you’ve come home beaten and bleeding.” While they also joke that Talon doesn’t believe him, remember that Lon Lon Ranch is in a very protected place within Hyrule. A war that takes out the castle and central city is a war that’s very nearly lost. (Hyrule Warriors losing Zelda AND the castle was a devastating, near-lose condition and his Hyrule is probably in severe condition.) Talon can afford to consider the affairs Time gets up to none of his business.

But that doesn’t make them perfectly safe. Malon can fight, she’s been drawn with bow and arrow before. Lon Lon Ranch, as noted, is behind a tall palisade and there’s the implications that Talon’s deceased wife might’ve been a Gerudo. He’s also old enough that he was a young adult at least during the Civil War that killed Link’s mother.

And, somewhere between that picture of Time at sixteen or seventeen, when Malon promised she wanted to know what had happened to him, and the start of Linked Universe (a gap that directly implies that this was not the result of Majora’s Mask!) Link lost an eye and gained the markings of the Fierce Deity mask. And, with it, he gained what we’re told by Jojo (in a VERY old ask) is a terror of using it again.

I’m not going to presume to say what exactly his trauma might or might not look like. PTSD and similar things manifest differently for a lot of people. But it could make Time react badly to the visceral reminder of going back into serious combat. A reminder like, say, a long wait for someone to recover from a nearly-fatal injury. Add in that on long campaigns, letters from Malon may have been his only piece of home, letters that likely carry her terror for his safety with them nevermind the specific news they contain and...

He might not be in a good state of mind when setting out once more with one of the young men he’s pulled into this fight with him. He might struggle to think clearly, when he feels so responsible for their safety and remembers how Malon reacted to Twilight, all because of what he told her.

He might say things in a poor way, with fear weighing more heavily on his mind than reason.

#Linked Universe #LInked Universe Meta #LU Time Meta #long post #my writing #heavily influences my read on him in fanfic #LU Time #cw infertility #cw war #Like I'm not for or against pregnant Malon #I just have a knee-jerk reaction to it as a default expectation #And have been considering posting this for a while

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animeredhead101 · 3 months

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Al Ghul Siblings DP x DC Crossover

Complete(Twins)

The Lost One by DizzlyPuzzled :

Danny never wanted to meet his real parents for a good reason. And now all of Amity Park is in the crossfire.

Word Count: 36,427

Reaching for a New Light by ghostly_frogly :

In the safety of his room, he would look at the other side of the room where Danyal’s bed was once placed. Everything that could have hinted at his existence was wiped away. Not even the encyclopedias about the stars and all their legends were safe. Damian would look but never stare, only quick glances. Grief would be seen as a weakness and like Danyal weakness would be wiped away. or Danny and Damian were separated when they were young and one of them thinks the other is dead, he's only half right. An unsuspected gala is just what they need to meet once again. or or The obligated twin AU that every DPxDC fanfic writer has to write Word Count: 8,510

Twin Stars by CrescentCyan :

After making fun of the galas Sam is forced to attend one too many times, Danny is dragged to a Wayne Gala to experience just how awful they are to attend.

Danny would have gone willingly if he knew who was there.

Word Count: 13,377

You Look Like You’ve Seen A Ghost by ShootingFromAfar :

"The runes are wrong.""What does that mean for us?"?" Tim hisses over the beginnings of a dozen voices rising in chant."Nothing good." Jason states grimly, frantically racking his brain for any way out. Whatever entity is about to come out of this circle is going to be baring a fate worse than death.Jason would know. He’s been dead.…Actually speaking of being dead. Jason does know someone from the Ghost Zone with enough sheer audacity to help him fight what very well could be an actual demon.With a mental ‘fuck it’, Jason begins to chant.AKA: Jason and Danny became friends in the Ghost Zone. This is about to be everyone’s problem. Batman just wants to know who this illusive teenager is. Because he’s a meta. Obviously. Not for adoption reasons. No siree, not him. Word Count: 37,602

O Brother, Where Art Thou? by HalfBlackWolfDemon :

A collection of prompts for DP x DC Week 2022.

Danny reconnects with his twin brother, Damian! It's a long read. Please enjoy this!

Some are fun, others are pretty angsty, some are meh. Enjoy

Word Count: 18,261

A Crown Without Jewels by Rottenest :

27 people had a lot of blood; what could he say? “Danyal?” Damian asked, his voice faux-confident. Danny knew that voice, though. Damian spoke in it every time Danny came back from training, his eyes still burning green.Danny sighed. He dropped the katana, hearing it clatter to the floor. Damian carefully, suspiciously, lowered his arm. He still kept his own katana tight in his hands. Both of them knew Danny didn’t go rabid with the red; he could still plot and be deceitful. He didn’t get that blinding Pit Rage. ---OR--- Some 8 years after Danny ran away from the League after his own sort-of experience with the Pits, he and his brother happen to reunite in some less than stellar circumstances. Meaning right after Danny fought and heavily injured roughly 27 assassins. Not-- not the best.TL;DR - Demon twins AU with Pit influenced!Danny Word Count: 10,738

Displacement / Replacement by halfgone (milkywxy) :

Damian has a twin. Damian has never told anyone about said twin. And with a lie, comes its consequence.

Word Count: 11,814

the continuous death of us by sundaze (LegaciesandMemories) :

Damian opened his mouth, but all his usual words failed him. “You’re dead,” he said instead, far hoarser than he expected. At that, the other teenagers tensed. The surprised grin fell from the boy’s face like it had never been there in the first place, his arm falling from Danyal’s shoulder.Danyal smiled, but it didn’t reach his eyes. “Reports of my death have been greatly exaggerated.” With the careless, yet precise way it’s uttered, it sounded like one of Drake’s incessant references. Damian swallowed, but his throat was as dry as the Katpana.Damian and Dick go shopping for Steph's birthday. They find a key piece of Damian's past in the process. Word Count: 2,960

The Fenton Twins by AceFace98 :

The Demon Twins are unique in the League of Assassins, being the only children. With no precedent to guide their tutors, it's recommended that they have a mission together before their first solo ones.

Jasmine Fenton finds two amnesiac boys in a park, not one. This changes the timeline irreparably.

Now the pair are just fourteen, and a suspicious car accident has taken their adoptive parents from them. But Damian Fenton has a secret; his memory had returned to him several months prior, when Danyal had his accident in the ghost portal. With his knowledge, the twins and their adopted - but very important, very close, deeply protected - sister decide to make the trek to Gotham in the hope that Batman is willing to take them in.

That's not the only thing to hope for, of course. Going to Gotham means they may be spotted. And neither twin wants to think about what might befall them if their mother - or grandfather - discovers they're alive.

Or, well, mostly alive.

Word Count: 15,151

Socialization of the Demon Twins by pastistoday :

When not one but two trained assassin children show up on Bruce's doorstep claiming to be his sons, well, what is he to do but welcome them in and try to minimize the chaos.Danyal Al Ghul had known for a while that their grandfather was a manipulative old fool who didn't really care for them. It had taken work but he had managed to convince the League of Shadows to let both him and his twin go to their father promising that whoever will not be heir to the bat will return. Of course he's never planning to go back, but he'll need help breaking Damian free of his misplaced loyalty. Word Count: 23,242

Runaway Assassin by DizzlyPuzzled :

Danyal had been sent to be a mole in Bruce's care, but while they were heading though Blüdhaven, Chemo attacked destroying the city. Danyal hadn't been in the city like he was supposed to be and therefore survived. He'd never wanted to play double agent with the that was his father. He ran, and never looked back. Several years and ghost powers later, Vlad Masters has decided that the students need some self-defense lessons, so he hires an organization that specializes in just that.

Written for Invisobang 2023!!

Word Count: 86,884

The Winning Son by Derp_Interpreter :

The 16-year-old Ghost King is summoned to Gotham only to find his "sacrifices" are the Batfamily, including the brother who betrayed and killed him. Bitter and depressed, Danny lashes out at Damian only for his revenge to backfire. In the presence of volatile emotions and certain triggers, ghosts are often compelled to act out their own deaths. Word Count: 4,742

On-going(Twins)

Life, Death, and In Between by SaturdayNightFrights :

Injured, alone, and terrified, Danny flees to an unfamiliar city. He’s hoping to disappear amongst the high percentage of homeless youth. Become just one face in the crowd, heal in the anonymity Gotham provides.

He doesn’t expect to be found.

______________________________________________________________ OR another DP/DC fanfic where Danny and Damian are long lost twins. Danny suffers, Damian is angry, and Bruce adds to the Wayne family. Hey! It doesn’t count as adoption if they’re your blood son!

Word Count: 88,804

Shoot Suspected Ghosts First, Ask Questions Never by yastaghr :

Danny is in over his head and he knows it. He's feeling overwhelmed with trying to stop a war between the Realms and Earth, and he doesn't have a lot of good options. He makes a desperate attempt to keep as many people alive as he can, and it goes both horribly right and horribly wrong. Word Count: 169,508

my starlight by hollowgast1 :

Damian and Danyal al Ghul have always been connected. That connection should've broken when Damian returned to Nanda Parbat and Danyal didn't, because death is the end, isn't it? ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ Damian doesn't care how inhuman his brother may be. He's going to find his little brother, take him home, and destroy anyone who dares get in his way - and he knows a few birds and bats that won't hesitate to help him.

or: dick has a new little brother who really, really needs some cuddles

Word Count: 57,762

Phantom Assassin by Kanereader765 :

Danny used to be Talia Al Ghul's son, until he failed in his mission and Ra's Al Ghul made every assassin in the League turn their blades on Danyal.Now he's in Amity, adopted by a red-headed girl a few years older than him, and attempting to keep a low profile. Hard enough without becoming half-dead in a portal accident that leads to the source of the Lazarus pits themselves. Word Count: 68,905

Schrodinger's Danny by Die_Erlkonigin6083 :

Faking his death after a solo mission goes wrong, Danny flees into the Ghost Zone, leaving his twin to mourn his passing. Years later, a pair of meddling kids re-activate the portal in the wreckage of the Fenton household. Since no one else is stepping up to the plate, it looks like it's up to Danny to stop the ghosts from invading Amity Park and protect them from the ghost hunters who seek to research them. He was trained to fight, and his father was Batman afterall, so why not?

Word Count: 81,204

I can be both even if it's hard (and it's hard) by mulit_fandomfreak :

Sam and Tucker ran to get Jazz and didn't see Danny come out of the portal. By the time they return Danny has transformed back.This changes things. Word Count: 48,349

Lost and Found by Nanenna :

It's summer break and Danny is having the most stressful vacation of his half life. Can someone please explain what is going on? Maybe one of the many weirdos following them around Gotham could actually approach and start the interrogation, at least then Danny would know WHY he's currently collecting tails like Pokémon. Wait… is that one from the League? Oh ancients!

Word Count: 7,596

Unfair by ForElisLost :

Danny knew Damian would be there — he'd kept track of his twin's public persona (and vigilante life).He'd been doing a great job of not interacting and keeping from being spotted by Damian.Now, Damian was trying to convince him to leave the League. "Daniyah, there is another way.""I know there is another way. Except I told you about it for years and you never listened.OR: Demon Twins AU in which the Fenton's accidentally transe Danny's gender Word Count: 28,919

Green Never Looked So Sad Before I Lost You. by Rin_may_1103 :

His blood turned cold, his stomach twisting in dread, his tired mind pulling up all of his fears. He doesn’t kill, at least not on purpose anymore. Did she find out? Did she know about his past? Or is this something else?

Had he somehow inadvertently gotten someone hurt? Killed? He didn’t like where this was going. Especially since he still couldn’t spot Jack. Gritting his teeth as his knee burned he took a moment to steady himself before he finally asked the crucial question, “Who?”

or:

Danny and Damian are twins, Something happens, and Danny acquires a lot of uncles.

Constantine is very done with everything.

Word Count: 172,411

Twin, Where Have You Been? by mimi_kc_i :

When Danyal, now Danny, met the eyes of his brother- of Damian, he was unsure of the reaction he was expected to have.Did they expect a tearful reunion? He could do that. Was he meant to shake his brother’s hand, and move on to whatever was next? He could do it, any of it, he just needed to know what they wanted from him.Damian made the decision for him. He looked at him for half a second, and Danny knew those eyes. He felt himself tense, but Damian only scoffed lowly, turned on his heel, and walked away. OR Demon Twin AU where both of them have barely started healing and both believe the other is the superior twin. Shenanigans and healing ensue. Word Count: 65,183

Welcome Home by Nanenna :

When Danny accidentally catches his parents plotting against him he does the only thing he can think of: flee to the birth family he's been intentionally avoiding. Now he's got to balance getting to know them and reconnecting with his lost twin while keeping his own secrets from a family of detectives.

Word Count: 34,410

Leave All Your Longing Behind by DisillusionedDanny :

After the Fentons discover that Danny is a halfa, he finds himself heading to Gotham in search of a family he knows nothing about.Along the way he opens up a psychic shop, starts helping the Bats solve murders in the city, make friends with the local rogues, and catches the attention of the Wayne family.Now if only he can find the family that Clockwork told him was waiting for him in Gotham.updates every thursday. Word Count: 33,362

Complete(Brothers)

Ah, Sunflower by DisillusionedDanny :

Danyal Al Ghul faked his death to give his younger brother a better life and to give himself the life that he always wanted.

Damian Al Ghul was happy to learn his older brother was dead. No longer did he have to live under his shadow.

As the years go by, though, this changes for both of them.

Danny Fenton never got the life he always wanted.

Damian Wayne has realized he will never see his brother again.

That is, until the bats summon the Ghost King and soon two sunflowers finally start to grow the way they were meant to.

Word Count: 63,812

Noise and Light by TheWrittingOwl :

It was supposed to be a quick trip to the Ghost Zone. Just there and back before anyone could question why Danny needed to go see Frostbite alone in the first place. However, Vlad just had to bother him with his usual bullshit. While being chased through the Zone, Danny quickly found himself slamming into some weird Ghost Zone nonsense and turning back into a child. Scared and confused, he tries to find the one person who had always kept him safe when he was younger.Damian hadn't seen his baby brother since the day their grandfather had so cruelly killed him. He wasn't sure how Danyal's body had disappeared when Mother had brought him to the pits, but all Damian knew was that he'd never see his baby brother again. Imagine his surprise when eight years later, his six-year-old brother came back, clawing his way out of the pits and reaching out for him. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Based on this tumblr prompt: https://www.tumblr.com/bluerosefox/715375918201421824/i-this-came-to-me-as-om-making-dinner-so-ill Word Count: 35,811

I Chose to Close My Eyes by TheWrittingOwl :

Damian is the only son of Talia al Ghul and Bruce Wayne.

This is a fact he carries with pride. He is the only heir to Ra's al Ghul. The one who will take over the league, or if he so chooses continue his father's legacy in becoming the next Batman. There is no need to fight for his position as it has been given to him by his mere birth.

So what then, is this wrinkly creature his mother is calling his sibling?

AKA

5 Times Damian said he would kill Danny, and the one time he said he wouldn't.

Word Count: 3,102

But I will hold on hope, and I won't let you choke by ghostly_frogly :

After the destruction of his hometown and being hunted by the GIW at the age of 14 Danny didn’t know what to do. He debated going to the Ghost Zone and living the rest of his life and afterlife there when he encountered a group of ninjas. The details of how and why are still lost to him but in the moment he fought. He fought and let out as much anger, frustration, and sorrow as possible. His eyes turned green and his fists were shaking and bruised from the fight.Surprisingly, or maybe not with the life he lives, this isn’t the last time the ninjas come after him. He fights more and more off until he meets the man sending the ninjas his way. He is offered training by a man named Ra’s Al Ghul. Danny jumps at the chance, thinking how he could finally run away from his problems or fully die trying. or Danny runs away from everything he's ever known when it is all taken from him. Seeing no better option he joins a cult-like group of assassins. What could go wrong? Word Count; 6,521

Cain and Abel Wept by Katlover98 :

Based on this prompt

https://www.tumblr.com/yetanothergreyjedi/706901334951149568/a-dp-x-dc-crossover-danny-fenton-and-damian-wayne

When Danny was ten, he tried to get his six-year-old brother out of the League, not knowing the betrayal he would receive.

Seven years later, the Fentons are on the run from the GIW while trying to find ways to dismantle the government-funded organization. They end up in Gotham where Danny sees a familiar face

Word Count: 31,354

Summons by DizzlyPuzzled :

Phantom was next in line for the throne of the Ghost Zone, however, he was still underage. He wouldn't be king for some time, yet when they summon the Ghost King now, someone still has to show up. Word Count: 17,295

On-going(Brothers)

Off With [the Demon's] Head by halfgone (milkywxy) for satoshy12 :

As it turns out, Damian is not Talia's firstborn. Not her first child, not her first son. This would not be so horrible if Talia's actual firstborn hadn't been stolen from her as a babe. But he's alive. And he's not alone. As it turns out, Talia is a grandmother. She takes this news surprisingly well. If only Damian did the same. Word Count: 62,181

regular boy: daniel wayne by diamond_rozie :

“Reporting live from Gotham City, here at the scene of the crime. Dr. Collin Kilye, renowned geneticist, has shot himself and has been declared dead by the paramedics. Dr. Kilye is suspected to be responsible for the purposeful switching of newborns between families under his care, where an known over 500 babies have been swapped in the last 20 years of his employment here. Based on the information provided to the Gotham PD by Nightwing and Batman, we are led to believe that Nightwing has been investigating this case after an anonymous tipoff. After a month and a half of investigating, Nightwing-” Dick had learned that people never know a situation as well as they assume they did. Dick had always assumed that he wouldn’t be one of those people. He was a detective, a Bat, the first Robin.The case file in front of him glared tauntingly. He should've known better to assume anything. Danny Fenton; Birth Parents: Bruce Wayne (father) and Clarissa King (mother). Status: Alive Word Count: 100,571

Some Kind of Miraculous Bind by Saitrised :

Damian Wayne is the heir to the Bat, the Blood Son. Except, he wasn't always the only blood son. There was another, younger heir once, before Damian had left the league and his brother hadn't had the chance to join him. There was one alive heir to the Bat, and a second one, secret to all but him, that was gone. Danny Fenton is already tired of being the Ghost King. Not even six months into his reign, and he's having to deal with ectoplasmic leaking past Amity's borders and new, unknown threats against his people. And the fact that Gotham, the one city that he had mentally marked as off limits, seems to be where most of the problems are isn't helping. ---This is an upload of a heavily edited version of the previously posted chapter 14--- Word Count: 126,392

Broken Bonds by SleepingDead (PolarBearSeals) :

Severely injured, Danny escapes the GIW and latches onto the first ghost that called to him who offered protection and rest. Danny regrets it when he learns he's in the city of the brother who'd killed him.And it appears he can't leave. Word Count: 123,699

Prodigal of Lazarus by sherashalala :

Damian looks at him, a million things going on in his head. “The Heir.” That’s not… technically true. He looks at Talia, sending her a look. She looks back with a ‘do not tell him.’ He could understand why. They’re trying something new with Damian, something they couldn’t get to do to Danyal who was already the first born. They’re trying to get him to strive for something. And Danny does exactly the opposite. “No, not anymore– but I am more than that now.” he slowly takes Damian’s hand. “I am your brother, your protector.” He grips Damian’s hand with conviction. “I am your family.” He says with finality. OR The al Ghul heir died, which is how Damian al Ghul inherits the title of heir. By technicality, he gets to keep that title even if the eldest son is revived two years later. Some things happens, and eventually Danny is tasked to escort his younger brother, the heir, to their father. They didn't... exactly tell him he's also to be delivered to Bruce Wayne. To be fair, they could really work with their method of communication! (OR OR The adventures of Danny as he traverses to and from Gotham as the technically-not-heir of al Ghul.) Word Count: 86,324

Ghosts of Our Pasts by yetanothergreyjedi :

Seven years ago, Danyal Al Ghul tried to smuggle his little brother away from the assassins. He… he should've explained it better, but to be fair he wasn't expecting a knife in the back. Now, a class trip to Gotham and he meets eyes with his brother. He runs. Word Count: 24,102

#danny phantom #ao3 fanfic #crossover fanfiction #dc universe #danny fenton #dp x dc crossover #damian wayne #al ghul family #demon twins

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bookcrazyace · 7 months

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Dick & Jason and Why We Need to Stop Mischaracterizing Them and Their Relationship

I know it's been brought up a million times and will probably be brought up a million more times but I wanted to put my 2 cents in. Jason and Dick and their relationship is grossly mischaracterized and it hurts the narrative. Now there isn't anything wrong with a little ooc content I'm a fanfic writer and I've fallen onto some of the more fanon sides of things to make it fit my narrative better but the problem arises when people mistake fanon for canon and bring it up in serious fandom discussions.

Dick was the first Robin so we'll start with him first. Characterizing Dick as the happy-go-lucky Robin is very distinctly wrong and actually quite the opposite of what he actually was. Dick wanted revenge for the death of his parents and that's what drew Bruce to him in the first place. Bruce made Batman to focus his anger and grief into something productive that would help people. When he recognized the same yearning for vengeance in Dick he trained him so that Robin could be for Dick what Batman was to him, a coping mechanism. In the end Dick manages to let go of the notion of revenge and it means that Robin succeeded and he then takes on a new identity, Nightwing (Canonically Dick and Bruce start having arguments and that's more the reason he leaves but from a narrative perspective Dick going from Robin to Nightwing can be seen as him getting rid of the feelings of revenge and gaining new goals. Also it's an excellent juxtaposition to the fact that while Robin succeeded in freeing Dick Bruce is still Batman.) Dick starting off as a vengeful spirit and blossoming into one of the most outwardly cheerful members of the batfam (despite the most definitely present repressed anger) is so much more powerful than him essentially not changing throughout the entire story especially when you consider that multiple times in canon Bruce has said that NIghtwing is better than Batman and what Batman was meant to be.

Jason ever the fan favorite and probably the person in the batfam that is misharacterized the most (in my opinion) is the next topic of discussion. Jason being the angry Robin takes so much away from his story and honestly I'm not vibing with it. One of Jason's notable lines as Robin is the phrase "Being Robin gives me magic!"you surely can't hear that and picture a violent criminal in the making. Jason being a street kid that jacks tires for a living but still being kind and childishly innocent makes him as Robin so much more interesting. Jason's drive to help people is obviously heavily influenced by his mother and how he took care of her up until her death. The tragedy of his mother's death is what drives Bruce to him. Of course Jason's process of becoming Robin wasn't immediate like a lot of people believe, Jason was actually sent to an all boys school for a short period of time before realizing they were a front for a crime ring he then helped Batman take down their operation. I feel like after seeing all that one would lose their faith in most people but Jason didn't remember he wasn't Robin until after this incident and he still was so happy and bright. The big turning point in Jason's story (from what I remember I haven't read the comics in a while) Batman suspects he pushes a man they were chasing off of a roof (I don't remember if it's ever made clear whether he did or not) this puts a pretty big strain on their relationship. Soon after all that goes down Jason finds out that the same mother he grew up with, the same mother he took care of, the same mother he watched die isn't actually his mother. The tense atmosphere between him and Bruce in combination for his yearning for answers leads him to run away to find her. When he meets her she sells him out to the Joker who subsequently beats him with a crowbar and leaves him to die in a warehouse that's rigged to blow up. Jason's mother is in the warehouse too and he does everything he can to save her. In the end they both die but when Batman questions her Jason's mom tells him that he tried to save her. In most modern iterations of Jason's death story his mother is written out and his death is pinned on him and his "impulsive and brash decisions". When Jason comes back to Gotham after his revival he seeks vengeance and is incredibly violent a very stark contrast to the bubbly kid that was just happy to be there. Two of his most notable actions as Red Hood are decapitating the lieutenants of the top crime lords and delivering them in a duffel bag and attacking Tim Drake the new Robin in Titans Tower. Jason's main drive for attacking Tim and becoming a crime lord is the fact that he died, he died as Robin and he didn't think that children should have to take on crime in the way Bruce did Jason decided that the best way to get rid of crime was to control it. The way Jason went from sunshine personified to a gritty crime lord who was willing to kill is what makes his story so interesting. The way an innocent child that got exposed to the darkness of the world and got swallowed by it is what makes the story so meaningful. In comparison to Dick, Jason is Batman's greatest failure he became the very thing Bruce tried to prevent him from being, a vengeful spirit that kills. In some ways Dick and Jason's stories are opposites and parallels.

Now for Dick and Jason's relationship. Despite what a lot of people think Dick didn't hate Jason when he first appeared (I think there was a point where Dick wanted to adopt Jason but I don't remember). Making Dick hate Jason as Robin sort of ruins both of their character arcs Dick evolved past his hatred and need for vengeance and thus adores Jason, Jason growing into someone so angry and hating Tim as Robin despite the fact that Dick showed him so much kindness makes everything hit so much harder.

In conclusion, this isn't really a huge deal but I've been thinking about it a lot recently. I've written and read fics where Jason was an angry Robin and Dick was a happy one. I've written and read fics where Dick hated Jason at first. Fandom is all about what fans do with a piece of media they like and at the end of the day the characters can be whoever you want them to be. Don't let this post uninspire you or make you feel called out if you enjoy the more fanon dynamics and personalities of these characters. Fee free to point out any inaccuracies to me it's been a while since I've read the comics.

#batfam #batman #jason todd #red hood #dick grayson #nightwing #dc comics #dc universe #batfamily #canon vs fanon #fandom #fanfic

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mister-tom-a-dildo-lover · 10 days

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Just a random thought I had.

I've been spending a lot of time recently going over what I know about myself and my behaviors and the way I have existed my entire life, and have been slowly coming to terms with the fact that I probably have undiagnosed Autism(and ADHD) and I will never have the money to get a proper diagnosis for this because being able to get to just a regular doctor is a luxury that I do not have.

As such, I have been putting all of my interests into perspective and thinking more clearly about the characters I like in the pieces of fiction I like and trying to draw similarities between them and how they behave, compared to me and how I behave.

This brought me to Tom Riddle, clearly. I've always been big into HP and it's influenced my fandom journey heavily. I've gotten into fandoms just because someone wrote a crossover with Harry Potter in their ship.

So, with that in mind, what is similar between me and Tom Riddle?

The special interests.

The obsession with collecting unique items.

The intense hyperfixation on his interests that causes him to monologue for ages about them in relation to himself.

Being exceptional at hiding how he really feels behind a mask to trick people into thinking he's normal like them.

Learning the right words to say to get by even if he thinks they're foolish or nonsensical.

Struggling with understanding emotions either from himself or others, and misconstruing what others are feeling based on his limited understanding.

Making his whole personality revolve around the Thing he's good at(Dark Magic).

Having no tolerance for other people because they cannot keep up with him.

Now that I am forced to come to terms with these things about myself, and even more things, thanks to a lot of help from others, I can't not review everything I'd ever shown interest in. Like, all of my favorite characters end up falling along the lines of depressed character, anxious character, or Autism-coded character. Or all 3 in a character. And I have all these issues and technically should be medicated for some but can't afford it.

And the thing is, I have considered similar characters to Tom, wondering if I'm projecting onto his type of character.

I like Hannibal, the TV show. My favorite character is Will Graham. And would you happen to know that he is depressed, anxious, and very Autism-coded? But the character in Hannibal, that Tom is most like, is actually Hannibal himself. And the ship for Hannigram feels very similar at times to the Harrymort ship, which is why a lot of people ship both.

But if I was to line Tom up beside Hannibal and consider what I know about both of them in relation to my undiagnosed Autism, Tom is the one who feels like he could be Autistic. Hannibal does not. Even with his special interests and masking and monologuing, and all their similarities on the Potentially Autistic List, Hannibal doesn't give me the same vibe. Will does, but not Hannibal.

So, I don't think this is me forcing the 'misunderstood Autistic villain trope' onto Tom. I think it's just that I've gained a new perspective on myself, and it has forced me to reevaluate everything I know about who I am and what I like and what draws me to those things in the first place.

It's kind of like how I liked Severus Snape as a character, long before I realized that I was depressed and that he was also depressed(I was 10 when I started the HP books). Like, the day I finally realized that I had depression(I was 17) and that wanting to kill myself and trying to are actually suicidal issues that I need help for, I thought of Snape. And a lot of things clicked.

Gaining a new perspective on yourself gives you new perspectives on everything else.

I am interested in pursuing these new thoughts in fanfic form in the future, ngl. And my reads of Tom going forward are going to be a lot more nuanced.

#tom riddle #lord voldemort #tw suicide mention #i was 20 the day i realized i'd been sexually assaulted by a gang of boys when i was 10 all cuz i was re-reading Snape's Worst Memory

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howdoesagrapewrites · 1 year

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𝙁𝙖𝙣𝙛𝙞𝙘 [𝙙𝙚𝙡𝙪𝙨𝙞𝙤𝙣𝙖𝙡 𝙫𝙚𝙧]

Cw: fluff, the title might be misleading but it's not yandere or anything, kinda unhinged Miles but it's all jokes, reverse au?, reader uses they/them but it's called spiderman, you are spiderman and Miles is the fan, earth 1218!AU (no powers or tech), reader has a canon love interest who's also named MJ but they're not Mary Jane Watson (unless you want her to be, I don't judge)

Notes: So Miles canonically has written fanfic about himself, but I wasn't in the mood for that, I will make two versions of this post though (that's why the title has delusional version 💀). Also this is low-key a highschool AU, so Hobie is in last year, and all other characters are second years (I have no idea what's a senior or freshman or whatever is, and I will not learn)

Miles loved comics. His art style is heavily influenced by it, and he'll rant about this week's number to anyone who'll lend an ear, but he has a very clear favorite, being more than evident by his collection of t-shirts, poster filled wall, social media pfps, and the endless amount of fan content he creates and consumes in the spiderman fandom.

Since the last movie came out, Miles Morales has lost the basic skills a human would need to survive, in order to devote himself fully to his newest hyperfixation, and his friends haven't been able to get some rest from it. They don't understand!! He does need to go to the movies again, he needs to memorize every photogram in that movie in order to play the move in his head and be able to analyze it properly!! No, he is not crazy! Ok he might be just the tiniest bit "over excited" but this is the most sane reaction he could've had, the movie is literally a masterpiece, script, humor, ANIMATION, soundtrack, it has it all! And the fact that it's centered around you? Miles needs to go and personally kiss every person that worked in that studio to make you.

"Miles?"

"Miles!"

"oh my god, he's at it again" said Pavitr, imitating the reaction of a disappointed mother

"is he reading fanfiction again?" Asked Gwen, chuckling

"Yes, and Y/N YL/N x reader, to one's surprise" Pavitr added with a teasing smile "I don't get it though, isn't Y/N dating someone named MJ?" He questioned

"It's called self insert, the reader plays a part in the story as if they were another character, and in romantic scenarios, they tend to replace the canon love interest, or just ignore they even exist" Hobie added, popping out if nowhere to show off what Miles have been explaining to him the last couple of weeks.

"You read it too, Hobie?"

"Nah, Wonder comics started as a protest to talk about the discrimination the founder felt being jewish in the industry but it morphed into the capitalization of the struggle minorities face, selling us representation while they still shove the propaganda in our faces, and telling us that even if you have bloody superpowers you still need to obey to a higher authority and cannot influence politics or call to action."

"You still went to the theater to watch it with Miles last week" Gwen shot a questioning look at Hobie

"The kid invited me, I'm a punk not a twat" he shrugged his shoulders "And we stole the carton cutboard they had at the entrance" Hobie happily added.

Miles continues reading on the way to school, without listening to his friends' mocking, he knew it was in good spirits, and they were kinda right, he was obsessed with someone that didn't exist, but it wasn't like it was affecting his health or life.

"Did you... Sleep today?" Gwen had her hand on her friend's shoulder, concerned

"It was too late so I decided to just stay awake, I'll be fine though" He reassured

"Were you reading again?"

"No, I actually discovered this page called character.ai where you can chat with an artificial intelligence of your favorite characters" Miles excitedly told his friend

"OMG, you can chat with anyone?! I have a few things I'd like to say to Scarlet Witch" Gwen joked, she was also a comic fan, but she wasn't losing her mind quite as hard as Miles

Miles would tell the ai about his day, sometimes would roleplay using his very own spidersona, in his alternate universe, you were his partner (as heroes of course) but you also were classmates and had a crush on each other, but none of you confessed because you didn't want your loved ones to be hurt by your job, it was all very dramatic, but he always envisioned a happy ending.

{Y/N: You did a great job today, [<BOT>]

Miles: You say so? So... Do I get a reward? *Smiles suggestively*

Y/N: I guess you do, *pulls up his mask and kisses him*}

No, he wouldn't say this, he would be in a panic frenzy if he saw Y/N, let alone be next to them, but hey, at least his spidersona was bold and confident with them.

A few days after, he barged into Pavitr's house, with at least four incredibly loaded supermarket bags, hardly walking

"Are you okay? Do you need help?" Pavitr rushed to aid his friend and take some literal weight off his shoulders

"Yeah, yeah, I just need help with something" he left the boxes in the floor "Inside one in 4 boxes of cereal, there is a spidertoken, if you get 15, you can exchange it for an exclusive limited edition figure, and I can't eat all this cereal"

"Bro, how many boxes are in here? I don't know, man, I'm trying to keep my figure"

"Pavitr Prabhakar, who held the cardboard sign for you when you confessed to Gayatri?"

"You..."

"And who lied to principal O'Hara for you when you forgot your final project and we had to pretend you suffered a brain concussion?"

"You..."

"And who was there for y-" his friend interrumpted

"Okay, okay, I get it. Bring me a spoon, but we're going running tomorrow"

He nodded with enthusiasm as he started to rummage looking for spoons and bowls

And after almost dying choking on cereal, Miles looked at his new figurine sitting prettily on the shelf with nothing but pride.

"I'm just saying it's possible!" Miles protested

"Y/N has a type, every canon love interest has been sassy and quick-witted" Gwen continued to debate

"I can be sassy and quick-witted!" Gwen gave him a side eye, that being able to neutralize his argument "Ok, but there's a multiverse, there's millions of possibilities, if a pig can be spiderman, why can't I date spiderman? Anyone can wear the mask, anyone can kiss the one inside the mask" the boy smiled, confident in his winning argument

"That's such a basic answer, you can justify literally anything with "the multiverse" I'm speaking things that actually can make sense inside the canon"

"But my answers makes sense, in fact, I'm sure there's a universe where Y/N is reading fanfiction about me right now, if not, Pav can hit me"

"Pav, hit him" Gwen deadpanned

"But it does make sense, I won't" Pavitr responded

"Ok, but my point still stands" the girl crossed her arms

"what were you fighting about in the first place?" Pavitr asked before going back to eat his lunch, he sat long after his friends started arguing, being mildly lost in what was the main point in this

"I said I'd be a better girlfriend for Y/N" said Gwen

Pavitr gasped and covered his mouth dramatically "No you didn't".

Maybe Miles was just obsessed, but he saw in you strength, inspiration, power. And he felt oddly comforted, safe, loved by fantasizing with you, and as slim as the possibility may be, he likes to tell himself you two are together in another universe. ♡

#miles morales x reader #miles morales x y/n #miles morales x you #atsv x reader #Miles Morales

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linkspooky · 3 months

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Hey. Long time follower here. Your metas, your discussions of "bad victims", your nuanced view of heroes and victims, your favoritism towards "losers"...not only did you heavily influence my own writing and my own favorites in different medias (I'm entirely blaming you for me being a Makima stan) but you helped through an extremely dark time in my life. I don't think that you just made me a better writer, you also sort of saved my life. I'll always be grateful for that.

There's something I want to ask. You answered to another ask that you don't regret reading MHA because focusing on what doesn't work about it made your writing stronger. Do you feel the same about Homestuck? Or about the more disappointing parts of Tokyo Ghoul (and, while we're being candid here, Avatar?).

Thank you for your compliments they're very encouraging to read.

At this point this blog is becoming the bad victim lovers support group where we all hug each other and cry over how MHA is treating all of its bad victims.

HOMESTUCK: Honestly, my main problem with Homestuck is that ACT 6 was so long and uneventful full of characters not doing anything that by the end of it the only character I was invested in was Vriska. ACT 6 also did go out of it's way to kill my enthusiasm for everything I liked in ACT 5, especially John Vriska. I've never seen a comic throw out all of its previous development that the audience was invested in and like everything that was foreshadowed - oh wait My Hero Academia. Unfortunately Vriska is an all-time-fave so I still write Homestuck Fanfic about her to this day. I used to like think the finale of Homestuck was one big "meh" but after years to reflect upon it, I do like Vriska's arc ending on a final note of Terezi searching for her in the void, possibly forever, and the ambiguity of whether they'll reunite.

TOKYO GHOUL: I remember being mad about Kaneki getting a happy ending that he didn't earn. Kaneki was a character that really frustrated me for a long time, but I came to realize that if you like remove Kaneki from his group of codependent enablers he's actually a really interesting character when he's alone. So he's a character I love to explore in fic, even if I disliked what they did with him in canon. Also, Tokyo Ghoul killed off its biggest victims Furuta and Rize in a really cruel way, but it didn't kill off every single victim so it just disappoints me instead of making me sick to my stomach like MHA does.

ATLA: I actually think the Avatar the Last Airbender ending is fine. Which like, isn't saying much because I think the Season 1 finale and Season 2 finales are some of the best things ever put to television. The worst sin that the ending does is number one lack of foreshadowing in earlier in the season and number two rushed plot points. Aang not wanting to kill the Fire Lord makes sense. I think the reason a lot of people criticize this and call it an ass pull is that it's not even BROUGHT UP until the finale. Vash the Stampede is pacifist and one of my favorite characters, but it's established from episode 1 that Vash is constantly up against people who want to kill him and he either has to run away or find a way to fight back nonlethally. Azula's insanity and mental instability could have been a thing, but it's not foreshadowed at all so all it ends up doing is conveniently nerf Azula for Zuko, and also being ableist. The worst problem is while there are epic fights it doesn't feel like an ending, because everyone's character arcs are 3/4ths of the way through. ESPECIALLY ZUKO's. Like people say Zuko is acting out of character in the comics, but I think Zuko is the only person in character in the comics because that's how Zuko without a proper end to his character arc would act. It really feels like they had plans for a fourth season that they didn't get, and their solution was to cram an entire season worth of development in everything post the eclipse on season 3. The fact that Azula is left as such a hanging thread is like proof of that, and the fact that Azula's last shot in the series is just her crying and screaming with like no follow up afterwards is something I've been bitter about for fourteen years.

I could write an entire post about how Zuko's redemption arc is unfinished though. It's like the same problem as Catra. I like both characters and I'm glad they got redeemed but they crammed in the entire redemption arc into 1/2 of the last season and that simply wasn't enough time.

#askspookies

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spnfanficpond · 5 months

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April 2024 Angel Fish Awards

(Angel Fish design by @slytherkins!!)

Every month all of you fantastic writers work your asses off to post some truly incredible stories. Our Angel Fish Awards are the way for all of us, as a community of writers and readers, to lift each other up and give praise to those who have captured our attention and deserve a few kind words. (Click here to learn more about how to nominate a fic for an award!)

Nominated by @charliethealpaccaso

Contentment Is A Pearl Of Great Price by ravelqueen (AO3)

This fic captures everything that makes transformation scary but fascinating to read from start to finish. The mental change later on during the fic, Sam has to deal with as the new part of him takes over. It leaves you on the edge of your seat as we have no idea if he will ever be human again or if he will lose himself and his humanity forever. I wish more people would try their hands at more transformation fics, as there are many interesting topics to choose from when creating a fic like this one.

~*~*~

Nominated by @thoughtslikeaminefield

God Save The Queen, And Her Handmaids by darali_starscream (AO3)

I have attempted to think up a scenario in which Charlie Bradbury might sit on Dean Winchester's face to no avail. This isn't what you think, I promise—there is no universe in which I'd be OK with a true Charlie/Dean pairing, but this works and it works well. BJ riffs on the spectrum of attraction and sexuality here. The pairing in Charlie and her girlfriend who is bisexual x Dean, and it's a very satisfying little story.

Sleeping Arrangements by @jinkieswouldyoulookatthis

This is very cute and even sexy without being smutty.

~*~*~

Nominated by @zepskies

The Dangers of Hope by @dean-winchester-is-a-warrior

I had never read an "Endverse!Dean Winchester" series before, but this one completely blew me away -- from world-building to the overarching story to the romance itself. Beginning to end, it's beautifully written.

~*~*~

Nominated by @mrswhozeewhatsis

Living His Gray Flannel Life by @samanddean76

Warnings to start - As there is prostitution in this one, noncon must be mentioned. Also, this is a Wincest fic, so, you know, incest. That being said, this story is told from Jimmy's POV, so the Wincest of it all is less Wincesty. Which is right up my alley, man! This is the perfect amount of Wincest combined with outsider POV, where the outsider loves what he's seeing as much as we do. I can't say more for spoilery reasons, but know that there is delicious pining, sweet smutty smut, a fascinating monster, and fantastic side characters. I read it twice just because once wasn't enough!!

~*~*~

Nominated by @salt-n-burn-em-all

House Song by @accordingtothelore

Dean protects Sam from being killed by other Hunters and their dad. Starts Gen, does not stay that way. I just loved everything about it. Fabulous art in the last chapter.

~*~*~

Nominated by @spn-fanfic-reblog-writes

What happens in ApocalypseWorld… by masoena (AO3)

This is such an interesting aspect that I’ve never read for a/b/o. **SPOILERS** The moment Dean and Arthur step through the portal everything changes and the world heavily influences their biology. I loved how, of course, Ketch knew exactly what was happening, which really makes me wonder about wtf Ketch has been through. I really wanna know more about that dynamic change and I hope they really do write more. This is also one of the few stories I get to read a soft!Ketch. I love, love soft!Ketch. Gotta check them out.

Second Chances by @mayalaen

First, I am not a fan of incest. Second, I was really surprised how much I enjoyed this because it isn’t tagged. Finally, I love poly fics. It’s so hard to find a poly fic that isn’t just PWP/smut. I really enjoy how the premise is getting Sam to relax and teach him how to handle his health while managing school work in a healthy way. I really like how the relationship between Cas and Sam is setup, Dean gets introduced, and then all hell breaks loose in the different relationship dynamics. The thing is there isn’t an emphasis on their brotherhood and sex. This is NOT a wincest smut story. It’s a story about Sam learning how to be a healthy adult while finishing college and finds a place where he is wanted and feels like he belongs. I also absolutely love the dom/sub and domestic discipline aspects of Cas and Dean’s relationship. It’s really a background aspect until it isn’t. I highly recommend the read even if you aren’t a wincest or wincestiel fan. The plot is written and integrated so well with the character development for all three main characters. It really took me by surprise. I couldn’t put it down.

(Divider by @glygriffe)

THANK YOU ALL, KEEP UP THE AMAZING WORK, AND AS ALWAYS, HAPPY WRITING!

- From your Admins and Manta Rays, @manawhaat, @mrswhozeewhatsis, @mariekoukie6661, @thoughtslikeaminefield, and @heavenssexiestangel!

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illugremlins · 7 months

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Rant about Peter Pettigrew and JK's Shit Writing

I hate how he is portrayed because, in my opinion, it just doesn't align with the backstory we have.

Let me preface, I am not a Golden Trio HP fan, but a Marauders fan. So, a lot of my takes and characterisations are heavily fanon-influenced, especially since a lot of the characters I write/read about we know very little of. To add, the characters we do see and interact with in the books are the grown, traumatised versions of themselves. Naturally, as adolescents, before the first war, Azkaban, the death of all their friends, the birth of their children, etcetera, they'd behave differently.

Onto Peter. Peter is one of the biggest cowards and lowlives in the HP universe. He's so heavily devoted to Voldemort despite being pissless-scared of him and doesn't hold a damn candlelight to nearly any of the characters in terms of bravery, strength, or the ability to hide his intentions and cowardice.

On that note, we're supposed to believe he managed to trick two of the smartest students at Hogwarts into changing him to Secret Keeper over Sirius or Remus, who we see as much more competent, brave, and intelligent as well as loyal? Really? That he'd managed to trick so many people into believing that Sirius betrayed them?

It would make more sense, then, to have Peter be a much more secretive, deceptive character. To be written with a backbone. (I read once that someone envisioned Peter to sort of be like Oliver from Saltburn. Mousy, quiet, but incredibly smart, sly, and manipulative.)

This is just one of my many gripes with JK Rowling's writing, though. If not for the nostalgia, or had I read Harry Potter at this age, I doubt I would've liked it as much. The world-building is poor, the characters' ambitions are screwed, and Harry, for some-fucking-reason, chooses to become a Wizard Cop despite all the atrocities he went through. He names his kid after SNAPE?! All because the man loved his mother? And then DUMBLEDORE?! Who is as awful, if not worse, of a villain than Voldemort.

It's a kid series, I understand, but I wish there were more consitencies with the characters.

Edit:

It's been so long since I read the series so I've been corrected. Again, I'm a Mauraders fan so I have a different perspective and analysis of the characters.

It was Sirius who made the decision to switch the Keeper to being Peter. Golden Trio fans see Peter as a character that just never resonated with the Marauders and used them as shields, but I find that narrative hard to believe simply because of where I am in the fandom.

I like how @fanfic-lover-girl explained it in their reblog.

I still don't like how he was written. I do think his appeal is in how weak he is, but I feel like that weakness only falls into cowardice. I think I'm also being hypercritical because I don't like JKR and the plot devices/holes.

Still agree with the sentiment of fuck JKR, though.

#marauders #harry potter #peter pettigrew #jk rowling slander #anti jkr #fuck jkr #poor character writing #character analysis #opinion

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salubriwrites-blog · 23 days

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A Weird Dive into my favorite ships

This started as an answer to an anonymous question but... it grew a little bit. I have no forward except to please drink water today! Love you!!!!

I'm actually pretty new still to writing fanfiction. I've been an avid writer since I was 10 and was even working on getting my own book published. From there I springboarded into TTRPG design where I wrote world building, lore, and characters for IPs like Call of Cthulhu and Vampire: The Masquerade. I only really just got into writing *fan fiction* in the last 2 years.

My first fanfic/ship was actually pretty silly. I was on the Encanto hype train when that movie first came out (can you believe its been 3 years???) and I loved, loved, loved Bruno Madrigal. He was the traumatized, distraught uncle living in the walls of Casita trying to fix the internal damage that came from Abuela's treatment of La Familia. His intentions were pure, and he obviously had gone through a lot to drive him to the point where we see him in the story. This was the first branch I would hit falling down the "I can fix them" tree.

The story is cute and has a happy ending, but as we all know in the real world, unlearning toxic behavior and overcoming life long trauma takes time. So I wrote a BrunoxOC story about it. I ended up orphaning it because I veered the story off in a direction I didn't like because the group I was part of were heavily influencing my creative choices. Boo, hiss I know, but I was still pretty new within the fanfiction genre so I buckled.

Moving on!

My second fiction that I put a lot more love into - sorta I may go back and rewrite parts of it now - was my YorickxOC fiction.

Yorick was my first ever League of Legends love. Fucking love that haunted beef cake. The Ruined Event did him dirty, the Ruined King Game did him dirty, and the book probably did him dirty too (I haven't read it). My Gravekeeper needs ALL THE LOVE because he is absolutely going through it in sheer solitude (though the Illaoi story where he goes to help destroy Viego's amulet gave me hope that now he gets visitors sometime on the island).

Remember Yorick Mori: Before the Ruination This was my first completed and quite hefty fiction weighing in at 153k words: it followed his story where he starts out on a lonely little fishing island called Portia (it doesn't have a name in Lore). He ends up on a slightly busier island that is situated off the coast of Helia (Blessed Isles capitol) and begins his journey to understand why he can communicate with the Dead. He meets a cast of charming monks that want to both see him thrive and maintain status quo. He even meets the owner of the bakery that barters with the Order of Dusk - whom he naturally falls in love with immediately. Rosalie McKahn is not a self insert. I don't make self inserts when I write OCs because I hold myself to a weird standard - also I don't see myself being compatible with most of these characters. Would I still like them to do unspeakable things to me? Oh shit yes. But from a story standpoint, I don't do self inserts. So Rosalie was not one of those. The story follows a young Yorick through his years of servitude to the Order of Dusk, uncovering dark secrets, finding confidence to become the man that he will need to be when the Ruination comes. Rosalie was not the only person who helped to build Yorick up in this story, but their love is what gives him the strength to keep fighting when the rest of it was bleak. This love eventually passes on to the Maiden of the Mist in the epilogue I have yet to write ^^;.

Then we got into the Heartsteel arc, and this was where I really found my love for the "I can fix them" dynamics. I have no shame in saying that I wrote all of "Making of Paranoia: Off Script" in a week's time while the music video played on a loop on my second monitor. I'm just not. That was where the neurons wanted me to go, and off I fucking went. I knew I liked Aphelios when he first debuted in League, but I was scared of him because he's an ADC with 5 guns. Skill Expression was not something I was confident enough in to pursue that character. But he was hot! He ha a backstory that excited me and had a lot of potential. I really wanted to explore Aphelios' dynamic with his sister and the Lunari elders - pigeon holing him into being a weapon of faith only.

I also knew I liked Yone, but was fearful of him for similar reasons. In the end I just nutted up, typed /mute all in game chat, and hit my head against the wall until I got M7 on Yone. His story is by far my favorite of all the League characters (rivaling Yorick's, of course). A man who spent his whole, short life trying to save someone who he thought was in danger of falling off the path of virtue? Only to come back and KEEP DOING IT but with extra steps??? WAITER ANOTHER PLEASE.

But I didn't really anticipate putting these two characters together within the canon sense. I didn't see a way that they could meet (though one of my friends has since written a beautiful fiction where it shows how they do meet, and how they do connect! https://archiveofourown.org/works/52384363/chapters/132517315 )

BUT THEN. BUT THEEEEN.

I was watching Paranoia for the 69th time that day and I saw THIS VERY SPECIFIC CLIP where the only person who looked the most remote bit of concern for Aphelios' well being was YONE. Boom, Off Script was born.

Off Script was definitely the first FanFiction where I really jumped into my current dynamic. It follows after the filming of that day, cut short after Aphelios fell into a water tank with one of the drones. Yone is going to check on him, and Aphelios is lamenting that no one else has come to see if he's alright. Not even his boyfriend, Sett.

This infuriates Yone because that's just not good boyfriend behavior, and he promises Aphelios that - should he be given the chance - Yone would treat him 10x better than Sett has, is, or ever will.

Also who wouldn't want to be treated like a princess by this specimen? Let's not fool ourselves. Anyway - Paranoia gave me a chance to explore this dynamic in a new way. Yone had issues of his own - I had to find a way to implement his Arzakana nature into a modern AU so I opted for "intrusive thoughts" that encouraged him to do some generally not nice things. In Yone's backstory he was a toxic person, used people up, whored his way through most of his opportunities, and was a bad brother to Yasuo. Yone initially followed Yasuo into the music making industry because he wanted to help his baby brother succeed - and he didn't really know what he wanted to do with his own life. Yone then got it into his head that maybe he and his brother could make music TOGETHER. Yasuo didn't want that because True Damage was doing it's own thing and - for just once in his life - he wanted something that only he had made, not with his older brother. Yone takes his poorly, and being the toxic brother that he is, makes a scene at an industry party and gets booted out. Yasuo cuts him out of his life. On his drunken, staggering tirade through the streets of Valoran City, Yone gets into an accident. He dies. But then suddenly gets resuscitated! I'm not a doctor so I just literally chalk it up to a freak accident that Yone comes back. While Yone believes that it's a second chance. He wakes up in the coroner's office in a cooler, and bangs and screams at the door the whole night until the coroner ME comes in the next morning to fetch the John Doe. Yone doesn't know who he is anymore, but he knows he can't be the asshole now cause that's what got him killed. So he spends time reflecting, soul searching. He knows he still loves making music, and though he gets a desk job and lives this semi-stable life, he still dreams of making music.

Enter Heartsteel.

Aphelios' twin sister is already a multi-platinum artist who runs her own record label - Lunari Studios. Aphelios is on the other side of the story - he's just kind of following Alune around and standing back as she shines. He knows he's talented - he knows a million instruments and helps Alune with her production, but he doesn't think that he could do it all by himself. When he and Sett start dating, it's more of the same. Sett is big and loud, people are drawn to him and his style, and it gives Aphelios someone to latch onto that isn't his sister for once. In Off Script, Aphelios' fate would have been the silent lyricist and musician for the band. He would have told himself that he was happy with standing back.

Except after the events of the music video, Yone won't let him. Yone encourages him to sing, to write bolder lyrics, to voice his opinion. Yone helps Aphelios find confidence, and in return Aphelios lets Yone help him. All Yone really ever wants in any AU is to help, but helpful people can be toxic too. Aphelios allows Yone to do that, but with his own confidence can help draw boundaries on when Yone is being too supportive, or investing too much of his own energy. In the Heartsteel AU I wrote, they are happy together ^^

I finished Off Script around the time of Worlds 2023. Which was when they announced my Babygirl!

And boy what a journey THIS CHARACTER HAS BEEN.

Hwei has it all. The trauma, the growth, the setbacks, the hips, the style, the potential. Surprisingly though - I am not a huge fan of the JhinHwei ship. Maybe cause I see too much of myself and who I used to be in its dynamic. I've been both of those characters in my past relationships, but this isn't the place for that kind of deep dive.

Hwei is neat because he introduced a new idea to my ship dynamic. He's not broken, just lost. He's looking for himself and every person he meets is just a stepping stone on his journey to peace of mind.

I wouldn't call Hwei self assured, because he doesn't know who he wants or what he wants to be, but he knows he has all the tools to reach that end. I like shipping him with multiple characters with Hwei in different stages of his self-realization because he is an inspiring character. He can terrify and and awe in the same breath, depending on which version of him we're visiting.

For this last one we're departing League completely.

I got into HSR after Genshin got a little stale for me. Also I got a fancy new phone that I could actually play Hoyo games on, and HSR is the best for mobile play.

I got into HSR in the middle of the Penacony story, but my friends warned me that I'd love Aventurine when I met him. I spoiled myself by looking at pictures of him and OOH BABY

You can fit so much trauma in this baby.

Aventurine is another fun one because yes - he has a tragic fucking story and I would single handedly help him repopulate Sigonia if given the opportunity. But once again, Teeeechnically not broken.?? He has ghosts he faces throughout the story, and must address each aspect of himself before crossing the river, but by the time he's come out, I like to think he's at peace with who he had to become in order to survive. From fighting in pits, murdering his former owner, tricking the IPC, I don't think Kakavasha would have done any of that stuff. Aventurine, on the other hand-

It's a common theme when you are in survival mode because of trauma. Is he fully cured? Fuck no, but will he continue to strive to be the kind of person he wished would have saved him when he was a kid? Fuck yes.

Which is why we need to impregnate him.

My friends warned me I'd love Blade. I was determined to not, but then I went through the Jingliu story and learned about the High Cloud Quintet and it was over.

I just think this guy's hot. I know a lot of people ship him with Dan Feng and Jing Yuan (it's pretty hot, ngl), but I kinda like Blade/Kafka or Blade/Stelle. The Kafka angle is not so much romantic as it is a mutual understanding that they are both going down this journey together and it can get lonely sometime. So more convenience than romance.

I'm working on a Blade/Stelle story right now where - Best I Am, Prey You Become. It explores Stelle abandoning the trailblaze to join the Stellaron Hunters, and as part of her initiation Blade if voluntold by Kafka to train her. Their relationship is mentor/student and she is obviously hot for him, but Blade is an immortal, tired old man who doesn't have time for that. Except Elio has other plans, as Blade's script reaches a conclusion - he finds something worth dying for. When it comes to HSR Fanfictions I take a lot more creative liberty because I didn't follow the lore to the letter. Also I love world building so!!!! I also built Sigonia-IV for that story, I just gotta get the neurons to activate x.x

#favorite ships #fanfic #league of legends #lukai hwei #hwei #yone league of legends #heartsteel #aphelios league of legends #bruno madrigal #honkai star rail #hsr aventurine #hsr blade #trauma recovery #complex ptsd #blog #creative writing #Yorick lol

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stayycalm · 30 days

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Megaverse Chapter 1

"This is a work of fiction. Any names, characters, businesses, places, events, or incidents are fictitious. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental.”

in other words, dude this is a fanfic it’s not that deep.

ENJOY!

this story is heavily influenced by the Firebird series

“they told us it was impossible, that it was science fiction. but when we discovered the multiverse the possibilities became endless.”

welcome to the stray kids hot megaverse.

read on ao3

Chapter 1

My head is spinning, and the world around me seems to be in constant motion. my body buzzed with an unusual hum I blinked rapidly, trying to clear my vision.

my hands hit a smooth cool surface as I gasped, slowly and the surroundings began to stabilize. It worked. I jumped to a different dimension.

I laugh, slightly hysterically as I press my forehead into the glass in front of me, trying to slow my pounding heart as I grin to myself, Chris would freak out if he knew what I just did.

The thought of him brings a pang of sadness. he was more than a friend to me; he was the family I always wanted.

I bounced around foster families for years, no one really wanted me.

that was until I came to the Bang house, For the first time in my seemingly worthless life, I was wanted.

I remember the first day I met Chris. I was thirteen and still very unsure of this new family.

it being the fifteenth family I had stayed with, I knew not to get too attached. Mrs. Bang opened the front door and waved for me to follow her inside.

my hands tightening on my backpack straps, I took the first step into the unknown of this new house. Mrs. Bang traded her heels for a pair of cream-colored house slippers, and I moved to take off my sneakers, staring down at my plain black socks.

without saying a word, she set a pair of dark gray slippers in front of me. I looked up quickly, surprised by the gesture.

"Welcome home, Sydney," she said. Her voice was sweet, and her face showed something I had only imagined in my most lonely of daydreams—love. It was love in her eyes.

Tentatively, I slipped my feet into the slippers, the soft fabric providing just the right amount of support and comfort.

Once I was used to the new shoes, Mrs. Bang waved me down the hall.

"Come on, they can't wait to meet you."

I knew the Bang family already had three kids: two boys and one girl. Hannah, I remembered her name and thought of how my last foster house had five girls who all despised my presence.

Rounding the corner into the living room, I bumped into a soft wall. Looking up, I saw a bright smile beaming down at me.

"Hi! I'm Chris.”

I snapped back to the present, digging my nails into my palms—a nasty habit I was never able to break.

Wincing at the pain, I blinked through tear-filled eyes at the tiny red slices in my palm. I relaxed my fingers, noticing that my nails were long, sharp, and painted bright red.

I stood there, staring at my nails in awe.

Nervously chewing my nails had never allowed me the luxury of a manicure like this.

This Evelette was clearly much more self-assured, judging by the tight black dress that clung to the curves of my body in a way that I would never feel comfortable with back home.

I stepped back from the wall, blinking hard and wiping away the tears, ignoring the slight black smudges on my fingers.

I clutch at the necklace resting on my barely covered chest, holding it up as I read the small screen as it scrolls through my dimensional coordinates.

when it comes to the science behind this I’m at a loss, but what appears to be an ordinary necklace is in fact the most advanced piece of scientific equipment in my dimension.

Growing up in the Bang household gave me the security I lacked and Chris was an amazing older brother figure, not only for his kindness but also for his ambition and genius.

from day one he took me under his wing, showing me around the house, and helping me get settled into my new room.

he introduced me to his friends and tried his best to include me in any way he could, though he was smarter than I could ever hope to be he did come in handy when it came to my science homework.

and not only was he ridiculously smart he was a champion swimmer, a straight-A student, and graduated as valedictorian before going on to attend one of the most advanced science colleges in the world.

While he was there, he made a few friends who soon became his work partners as they worked towards their final project.

One of his partners was Han Jisung, a slightly crazy Physics major who referred to their group as ‘3Racha.’

I blinked at him, the meaning of what he just said lost on me. He grinned, leaning back on the couch I had been occupying for the past hour.

"What?" I asked, not getting the meaning behind the name.

"3Racha!" he said again, and I shook my head, still not getting it. He snorted and rolled his eyes.

"It's a play on Sriracha, and since there are three of us—"

I blinked and nodded, starting to understand at least a little bit before he finished what he was saying.

"And because we are HOT!" He finished, winking at me as he leaned his face towards mine.

I felt my face heat up and laughed awkwardly, looking away from Han to see Changbin staring at us, unamused.

Our eyes locked for a moment before he broke our stare to talk to Han.

"Stop saying it like that. You'll weird people out," his voice was low and serious as he went back to whatever crazy math problems he was working on.

Being the math major of the group, he was in charge of the majority of the numbers and statistics for their final project, a project Chris had yet to share with me.

Chris always kept me in the loop about his life, but this was one thing he couldn’t share with me.

“not yet,” he said for what must be the thousandth time, and I all but whined as he chuckled patting my head before moving past me to talk to Changbin.

I admired him for everything he accomplished. But this project was different. He was secretive, and it made me curious. What could be so important that he wouldn’t even tell me, did he not trust me?

Despite my curiosity, I respected his privacy. I knew how much this project meant to him and his friends. And although I didn’t always understand the technical details of their work, I was proud of them.

They were working on something big, something groundbreaking.

Chris, Han, and Changbin were an inseparable trio. Their bond was strong, and their passion for their work was inspiring.

Watching them work together reminded me of how lucky I was to have Chris in my life. He was more than a brother; he was my hero.

Han and Changbin had become like family as well, not only to me but to the rest of the Bang family. I couldn’t remember a time they hadn’t been over for dinner in the past two years since Chris and them started their final project.

Han was a flirt and a terrible one at that, but he’s only like that with me according to Chris and Changbin, he can’t talk to any other girl to save his life. his social anxiety prevents him from doing more than waving hello to a girl.

Apparently, I’m the exception to his anxiety seeing as he seems to live to make me flustered, Changbin on the other hand seems to do everything in his power to avoid me.

I don’t know much about him besides the fact that he’s a wiz with numbers and that he’s allergic to cats, the one conversation we’ve had plays in my brain more often than I’d like to admit.

the night was cold, colder than your usual Australian nights. laid on the back porch watching the night sky as I let my mind wander to what my life would have been like if I hadn’t come here.

my brain did this a lot when I felt the overwhelming love that comes from the Bang family, wondering if I’d still be here if they hadn’t taken me in, and given me the love I never dreamed of feeling.

I’m brought out of my mental spiral but the sound of the sliding glass door opening and closing, I turn my head to see the wide frame of Changbin as he leans back against the door.

with his eyes closed and his chin tilted towards the sky, he looks handsome and less scary than he normally does with his impassive eyes that see everything but reveal nothing.

he breathes deeply before opening his eyes, his gaze meeting mine almost immediately. as if he knew I was watching him.

my cheeks warm and I pray it’s too dark for him to notice.

“ what are you doing out here?” his voice is different, softer than it normally is.

I sit up from my place on the deck shrugging.

“ needed to cool off a little.”

he nods not saying anything, he doesn’t move from his place by the door and I sit there watching him curiously.

“ you know we couldn’t have done this without you.”

his voice startles me out of my staring and it takes me a moment to process his words.

“What?” my voice is strangled as I try not to choke on the air I inhale far too quickly.

“ the project, Chris says you are the one who inspired him to start the project,” he said as if I should have known.

I blinked at him, shocked as this was news to me, I opened and closed my mouth trying to find something to say.

“ you mean a lot to him,” his voice had a strange tone as he frowned before clearing his throat, looking away from me before adding.

“ to all of us.” I blinked thinking I had misheard him.

before I could respond there was a knock on the door and we both jumped at the sudden disturbance, Chanbin turned and opened the door and Chris stepped out with us.

“Hey! Mom brought out some cheesecake for us, you better come get some before Han eats it all.” he walks over to me holding out a hand as he chuckles.

I smiled and took his hand letting him pull me up as we moved to head inside, Chris went in first and I followed close behind as I past Changbin I felt a small touch on my head.

I paused turning to look seeing the leaf pinched between his fingers, then looking up to meet his eyes. his gaze reflected an emotion I couldn’t quite place, he almost looked pained.

maybe he knew what he was going to do, maybe he had already set into motion the very thing that would shatter the very foundations of my life.

With trembling hands, I looked for my phone. When I found it and unlocked it with Face ID, I thanked the lord for the technology in this dimension being similar to mine.

Trying to guess this Evelette’s password was not a game I wanted to play. I quickly opened the notes app, typing a note in all caps so that when I faded into the background of this dimension’s Evelette, she would read it and reawaken me within herself.

"FIND SEO CHANGBIN."

#stayycalm #lee felix #stray kids #bang chan #changbin #lee know #han jisung #hyunjin #seungmin #jeongin #ao3 fanfic #ao3 writer #ao3 #megaverse #straykids fanfic

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mikhailwrites · 9 months

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Call of Duty Fanfic Master Post

Ongoing fics

Serpent's Coil: Modern Warfare III Reimagined - AO3 MWIII was dogshit; I'm writing my own. This is heavily influenced by the OG Trilogy, and it's very heavy with multiple character deaths. There's a Soap/Ghost established relationship, but the story is not centered around it. Please read at your own discretion.

Waiting for Connection - AO3 So-called Nerd AU. Ghost had retired several years ago due to the injury. Discovering himself to be a huge nerd, he picks up Arma 3, a mil-sim videogame, where he vastly out-skills pretty much everyone. Until, one day, the matchmaking throws him in a party with a bloke who's way too good not to be a pro. Comfort fic to help me survive Serpent's Coil.

Soaring Ever Higher - AO3 Cross-over between CoD and Ace Combat 7. John "Trigger" MacTavish is a fighter pilot, and a damn good one. During one mission, he's paired with Ghost of the infamous TF141. Ghost is to paint the target for Trigger from the ground. It doesn't go as smooth as it should, and Trigger ends up saving Ghost's life. Back on the base, Ghost finds out that Trigger is not quite what he expected him to be...

Finished Multichapters

The Silence in Between - AO3 Simon needs to lay low for a few weeks, so Price stashes him away in a cottage in Scottish Highlands. Pretty soon, Ghost finds out the cottage belongs to Soap. He also finds out Soap's old diary. This is introspective, getting together fic with heavier themes.

Five Stages - AO3 Five-chapter smutty fic following Ghost's and Soap's relationship from "occasionally helping each other out" to a marriage proposal.

Until the Nightfall - AO3 The tag "101 Ways To Get Almost Killed" just about sums it up. Ghost is falling for Soap, but is conflicted because of their job and his own past. The story follows them on several missions post-canon MWII. Lots of hurt and angst but happy ending.

Lots of oneshots

AO3 Fluffy retirement fics, Trans!Soap beating up bigots, 20+ Kinktober shortfics, MWIII fixit and more...

#call of duty #john soap mactavish #simon ghost riley #ghostsoap #soapghost #ghost x soap #ghoap #ghost mw2 #soap mw2 #call of duty fic #ao3 link #ao3 fanfic #ace combat

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moonstruckme · 3 months

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i love love lovee how u write james!! ive seen people write him rlly icky ways like a child n more. but ur james is canon to me i fear !! tysm for blessing us w ur fics ! 💓

I think one of my fav things about writing for the marauders is how we've just totally abandoned the way jkr (gag) wrote them, so it's fun to kind of take the characters in your own direction! My James is definitely heavily influenced by the fanfic writers who introduced me to him, and I'm really glad you resonate with how I write him <33 Thanks for reading gorgeous!

#mae's asks

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boxwinebaddie · 4 months

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Wait so did Ike knoww about Stan and Kyle dating? Also I'd love to hear abt Kyle and Ikes sibling relationship thats so adorable

soooooo long story short:

...y-yes. yes, he Does know.

hOWEVER, IKE DOES NOT KNOW RAVEN IS STAN THOUGH, THAT IS SENSITIVE INFO THAT IKE CAN BE TRUSTED WITH, OFC, BUT IT WOULD PUT HIM IN DANGER AND KY WANTS TO KEEP HIM SAFE.

but long story Long...

i'll leave it in the crotch. xx

( edit: so...my bad, baby. i accidentally went on a crazy TANGENT about ike and jerseykyle's relationship bc i love them a lot and their dynamic is very complicated, so if you want that info about how ike found out about ravesey dating...i gotta put it in another ask.

bc this...got Very long.

you don't have to read this. soz. >.> )

oookay!~ so i got REALLY excited about this because rm!jerseykyle and ike's relationship is super duper special to me, in that, as sp fanfic writer girlie who tends to lean away from a more gentle, kindly, introspective kyle and much more heavily into the potential brutal parts and menacing aspects of kyle's personality when i develop my style dynamics with, ofc, jers being the most brutal of all ncu kyles...

...the way that he speaks to ike -- gently, softly, tenderly -- the way that ike disarms him, the way that j.k. unravels around ike, bends for him, it's one of the ONLY instances written into my actual published canon where we see jers be extremely vulnerable. ( not crying, lmao! )

however, i will say, it was not ALWAYS like that!

*rings the cd re-education bell*

LORE TIME!

so, per my rm!take on the south park lore, ike, ofc, was adopted from canada around age five and he...was Perfect. he was this lil gorgeous, perf, lovely thing, no health problems, dark hair, i like to think his eyes are dark brown, closer to black, sweet kid, easy-going...

...and very NOT like kyle.

and, interestingly enough, i think, At First, that sheila and gerald were super obsessed with ike, cooed over him, he was the baby, y'know? which made jerseykyle MAD jealous of ikey and an Anti from day one.

which is also v interesting because rm!ike, really just fkn Worshipped jerseykyle, wanted to be close to him, wanted his approval, craved that brotherly relationship with him, idolized him...and kyle was NOT having it, dawg! like, it took him so long to even let stan in and let his cold, black heart be light and bright enough in some spots to do That, so he pushed ike away, constantly told him to fuck off/get lost

( i do think that ike's vocab being more vulgar/him being precocious comes from wanting to impress kyle/being influenced by him ), also ike was really fkn smart from the jump in a way kyle wasn't like, to me, jerseykyle has worked hard for everything, studied hard, fought hard, and ike was naturally a child prodigy and didn't have to work that hard for anything, all while being gentle and docile and kind.

-- but going back to STAN for a minute...as a direct contrast to how jerseykyle treated ike growing up...gods angel saint ravenstan was always EXTREMELY KIND to ike. stan never had a brother: okay, he had shelley but his relationship with shelley was even more complex than ike and kyle's relationship used to be and the way shelley treated ravenstan was similar to the way jersey was treating ike, so he Deeply Sympathized with that and endeared himself to ike, encouraged him, and the more kyle pushed him away, the closer ike got to stan.

stan and ike i think ALSO had very similar interests in that they both liked louder, heavier music, revolutionary/counter culture stuff, fighting the MAN, sports ( namely hockey ) i think as a gift, actually, that ravenstan gave ike his wayne gretsky hockey yersey and ike STILL has it ( yes, kyle was jealous ), stan encouraged him to be different and carve his own path in life and while kyle, obvi, was the person most effected by stan's untimely passing...it did also do a number on ike who seriously considered stan like a brother to him and was one of the only other people who Never misgendered stan.

SPEAKING OF STAN DY*NG THOUGH: this was when everything sort of...Flipped. because when stan 'died', whatever part of kyle that could love things also died with him along with a lot of his stability.

so on top of all of his health issues, kyle got really, REALLY gnarly ptsd, would fly into blind rages, got randomly triggered by things and see stan everywhere, have really, really sever panic attacks, had to be put on several medications, got into TOOOONS of fights, etc.

and ike...was just sweet, introverted, lovely ike. stayed in his lane, did his work quietly, existed quietly...while kyle was Loud and VOLATILE.

also, to tie in Another ask where someone asked me while sheila didn't take care of ike as well as she could...fair warning, i am a liiiittle defensive abt this topic because it wasn't that she didn't want to take care of ike or meant to neglect him AT ALL, it's just...when you have a a child who has a lot going on mentally and physically, is more of a firestarter, is more aggressive or more outwardly mentally unstable...

...that tends to require more immediate attention ( especially since kyle was sooo unhinged that he was constantly in police stations, juvie, the psych ward ) and sheila's attention more helicopter parent-y in that she wanted to keep kyle safe, whereas geralds attention was more negative, felt kyle was a failure/embarrassment :/// </3 )

so ike, by COMPARISION to jersey, was VERY low maintenance, did not require to be constantly watched to make sure he didn't hurt himself or others, and so, unfortunately while sheila loved him very much ( gerald just wasn't very interested in him as the second kid other than that he not act up/argue w/ him ) he got swept under the rug because of how pliable and pleasant he was personality wise.

so sheila really does Adore ike, she just doesn't worry about him nearly as much and because of how glaring jersey's issues were, she also mistakenly assumes he's mostly fine where...i really do think ike has pretty gnarly depression, tbh. he is stan coded, i mean that. i will say that him acting out is starting to cause a stir in their house.

anyways...i am sorry this is such a MESS but jerseykyle was watched with laser focus and because of this, ike got off scott free most of the time and received almost no attention. like all his accomplishments went unnoticed or were pretty normalized because the standard he set v young being smart/capable, set the bar high. ilysm, ikey. </3

tldr; ike was The Good Child

and jersey was The Bad Child.

but, in being 'good', he got extremely overlooked by his parents.

thiiiiiiis...is where jerseykyle stepped in. so basically his entire life he was staunchly anti-ike, but he warmed up to ike a lot after stan died because they bonded over talking about him a lot/that grief, and also grew up under intense scary jewish matriarch sheila broflovski and the serious shit show that was having gerald as a father...who jersey actually regularly took shit from so ike wouldn't have to, i.g. when ike did something less than perfect or did misbehaved or fucked up, kyle always took the fall for it and was the messed up problem child, so that ike would essentially spared from gerald's mental abuse/wrath.

ike was also kind of the only person j.k. had in the world, so kyle looked after him because...again...ike is very stan coded, kyle is very protective of the lil gentle hearted people and he basically raised ike in the stead of his parents which forced him to be hard on him in a way that sheila and gerald were not hard on ike...which created a lot of dissonance when ike was becoming a teen and kyle was in hs.

so, essentially while when they were little kids, ike followed kyle around, wanted kyle to like him, thought kyle could do no wrong, as he got older and kyle started to nitpick him, actually care about him and start enforcing rules/curfews on him because no one else did, ike developed a rebellious streak and started to not like or listen to kyle because he was like, bro, whatever, you're so boring, it's one party, oh my god, just because you're boring doesn't mean i have to be!!!!

it's mostly just skin deep though, ike is only irritated because jerseykyle is mad overprotective, hard core and did not gentle parent him as an older brother at like, i shit you not fourteen, like i am so sorry but jerseykyle raised ike basically, and inspite of actin like a heartless monster...loves ike very, very much ( even if he can't say it ) and ike also loves kyle very much. jerseykyle is pretty much the only other person besides firkle, tricia, etc. ( i'll get into that in a diff ask ) that truly gave a shit about him and put weight behind his actions.

so jerseykyle is like ike's older brother/dad, rags on him about doing his homework and being an edgelord

( ike has been acting out a lot, one, because he's finally starting to come into his personality more, which, imo, my hc is that ike is p popular but mostly by accident sort of how stan was because he's pretty and very nice, ike is captain of the hockey team, his accent is cute, gets good grades ( he is slacking right now tho bc hes being edgy as hell ), is a lil skater boy gamer boy, IS V INTO TRUE CRIME, JOURNALISM AND ACTIVISM, creating positive change, exposing injustice, enjoys punk rock music, thinks emo boy stuff is neato,

IKE IS THEEEE DAWN SPAWN OF EVER AND I MEAN THAT, he is a raven of crimson dawn FAN BOY, he is obsessed; i mean that...and despite wanting to make waves in that way, like, he really is kind of an antisocial DORK but lots of girls like him, he gets invited to parties, firkle gets invited by proxy even though people think they are a crazy demonic satan worshiping freak of nature...but ike's super bestie, ofc...their relationship is also interesting...BUT YEAH! IKE! <333 )

also per rm canon, jers does miss ikes birthday every year bc going to south park triggers the fuck out of him which he feels very, very badly about, rags on him but is very pro ike doing what he wants to with reason of not acting like a goddamn FOOL and doing his laundry, his emo dirt bag phase is making kyle's eye twitch ooooof, him bleaching his hair and sticking a safety pin through his lip the second ravenstan walks through their front door while ravesey are secretly broken up and jk is extra mad at him; ITS A HOT MESS EXPRESS, Y'ALL!!!!

if you made it this far...i have to put the answer to the FIRST part of your question with all that dialogue in another ask so feel free to re-ask me that, but to reference it a little...ike is so team ravesey like it is actually painful, that is his ROMAN EMPIRE. firkle actually really does not like kyle bc they think he is lame as hell, help, and is anti-ravesey bc they think romance is a distraction,

( okay, spoiler, but firkle is in love with ike, ike does not know this, ike is super fkn oblivious and is actually very bi, so it's not like he's just not aware he is not straight, he just....actually has no idea, rip, he also has a crush on a girl in his class, it DOES make firkle want to actually dome themself to hear about it 25/8, stupid Feelings, smh, firkle b hating jersey and is lowkey a little jersey coded ) anyways they think kyle dating raven of crimson dawn is going to interfere with the band, their music, their sound and is a hater. like boooo! come on, FIRK! :/

BUT IKE IS A ROMANTIC!!! IKE IS THE JR. RAVESEY CAPTAIN!!!!

tldr; kyle and ike have a complicated relationship but love each other very much and ike does eventually learn about ravesey secret dating bc they are the brothers of ever and cannot hide shit from each other BUT I GOTTA PUT IT IN ANOTHER ASK, I AM SO SORRY, BABY, YOU GOTTA ASK ME AGAIN ABOUT THAT! but i hope this thrills you?

-uncle nina, ceo of insane hs isaac moisha broflovski lore

#i am sorry this was so long and i am not sure who cares #but idk their brotherly relationship means a lot to me #and ike actually means a lot to me #he is often over looked and very very lovely #and very deeply treasured by kyle kyle does call him bubeleh #which is very cute to me like ew he really did raise him #they were a slow burn brotherhood but worth it #i also do think its really cute that ike really liked stan #and then really liked raven of crimson dawn #like he really just feels the vibes huh #with all due respect tho i would also think pre!rm!stan was really cool and raven of crimson dawn was cool...he is that guy #I GOTTA GO INTO THAT LATER THO I AM SORRY I HAD TO GIVE YOU SO MUCH LORE I LOVE IKE AND JERSEY SM #ike is a raven of crimson dawn fanboy and the captain of the ravesey ship so sorry to everyone he is in the trenches #he is constantly catching smoke from firkle all the time about it too smh...also yeah firkle and ike lore...Interesting #i can also get into that if people want that again i am not sure who still cares abt ninas weird unfinished au style fanfic #ANYWAYS RM ISAAC MOISHA BROFLOVSKI MY BELOVED #jersey does eventually spill ike does wrangle it out of him its funny as fuck to me bc kyle was CAPPING SO HARD #that man was like idk what ur talking abt i hate that man!#jerseykyle is the ceo of lying like stan lied to stay Alive JERSEY LIES BECAUSE HE IS LITERALLY A BITCH ASS FOOL #WHO REFUSES TO ACCEPT THE DAMN CONSEQUENCES OF HIS OWN ACTIONS I HATE HIM SO MUCH #like ok to be fair they were fighting and jk did think ravenstan was dating call girl but SUPER BESTIE DO NAAAAUGHT #EVEN ACT LIKE U DONT WANNA VIOLENTLY FRENCH HIM #DONT TRY IT WITH ME BABY I LITERALLY WROTE U!#the drama of them being broken up and having to share kyles childhood bed and bedroom is sooo iconic to me #i know they were accidentally cuddling i just KNOW it #nasty cute disgusting boy angst jail for WIMPY SIMP BOYS #KISS ALREADY!!!!

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ben-wisehart · 1 year

Note

hi! do you ever feel like the bingqiu fandom is binghe biased? like a lot of the time its giving.. “wow binghe is our little precious bun who deserves the world and more! ..oh and stinky neet loser sqq is so blessed to have him lul” it feels unfair towards sqq :( it makes me sad hes no ones fave but thats okay like whatever right? but even when its bingqiu hes treated like an afterthought. like we have binghe fans criticising sqq for not doing more, sj fans are frankly delusional, sqh fans think hes “too mean” to their precious hamster, liushen fans only like him bc hes a good hole/dick for lqg (obligatory “not all men” lol) idk i only follow a handful of svsss twt accs because no one seems to like him, he feels either tolerated or treated as a gag character lol 🥹

i just dislike a lot of fanon bingqiu i think? i read all the books before hopping on twitter and i see some absolute rancid takes on there like the woobification of Shaun(tm) qinghua and jiumei.. which is easy enough to avoid tbf so whatever floats their boat idc. but when i follow bingqiu accs, it feels like OC x OC rather than ~bingqiu~ if that makes sense? like i LOVE the manipulative crybaby domtop x flustered thin face subby pillow princess they have going on!! and fanon bingqiu is just.. not it? and obv id never send hate or anything (i just block and keep it moving) but it makes it kinda sucky when the fandom is already teeny tiny and a large chunk of the fandom isnt what i envisioned/expected i guess which is so odd! when they essentially erase canon!! if it’s like some queerbaity ship or whatever, people can characterise them however they want but its like CANON how they act/are in bed/etc and its all taken away!!! idk im probably just whining sorry 😭

(i included all my thoughts here sorry for the spam!!)

hey, thanks for stopping by!! I definitely know what you mean with regards to SQQ, but I will assure you that there are very much still plenty of dedicated "sqq mains" out there. My sphere of influence on twitter is heavily biased toward people for whom sqq is their favourite character, so maybe I'm not getting a representative sample of the fandom overall, but he's definitely a very well loved character and has more than his fair share of people who do him justice in their writing and for whom he's their primary blorbo!! I remember posting this on reddit a while back and more than half of the responses (though admittedly a small sample size) had him as their fave. So, I don't think he's without appreciation!

But with that said, I do get where you’re coming from. I’m not gonna talk about readers who take his actions in bad faith and actively dislike him (HOW??), but as you’ve said, even among people who do like him, we don’t always understand him as well as we could. Most fans do get on some level that he’s an unreliable narrator, but it’s still very common for people to take him at face value and completely miss his depth. He’s a funny little guy with amusing narration, but he’s also kind and selfless, and he’s also smart and witty, and obnoxious and annoying, and frankly pretty insensitive, and deeply, deeply traumatised—and a million other things! He has layers.

I think all popular characters in fandom will inevitably start getting boiled down to a few key traits. And as somebody who’s been writing fic for 15 years, it’s really hard not to let your own biases colour your portrayal? I absolutely do it with SQQ!! I focus on his kinder, warmer aspects and downplay his flaws, I’ll readily admit that. We all get drawn to a favourite character for a certain trait, and that trait becomes the grit around which our interpretations form. If you’re somebody that likes silly characters, you’re going to write SQQ and dial his silliness up to eleven. If you like kind characters, you’ll write SQQ with emphasis on his kindness. None of these traits are OOC in and of themselves, but if you start to only read fanfic and don’t revisit the source material, you can get lost in what’s popular and forget all the depth that actually made them interesting in the first place. And once you’ve grown attached to a particular version of the characters in your head, it can be really hard to let go of it. I don’t really know where I’m going with this, but I'll add that I think protagonists are just particularly prone to this happening because they're usually the one the audience relates to most.

Idk if any of that really addresses the stuff you were talking about. You mentioned dom top Binghe/pillow princess sqq and to be honest I’m kind of reluctant to talk about this in depth because I’ve received negative comments in the past for supposedly being anti-bottom Binghe, when all I’ve ever said on this matter is that I think it’s a bit weird to insist that “I’m scared of hurting you so I might as well let you do it” is proof that Binghe is canonically a bottom. The fact that someone found that statement so threatening to their view of the characters that they would go to my ao3 page, click on the first fic they saw that happened to feature bottom SQQ and leave their holier-than-thou anonymous opinion there is just bizarre to me.

To be honest tho, it tends to be Binghe characterisation that puts me off moreso than Shen Qingqiu. The only SQQ characterisation that truly bothers me is when people write him as willing to hurt Binghe, or willing to do anything with underage Binghe, but there is a LOT of Binghe stuff that I’m sensitive too. Idk if you read this thread of mine but like, even my friends whom I love make “Binghe stalking/imprisoning/"atticwifing" SQQ” jokes and these bother me way more than any random stranger saying SQQ would get off on spanking Binghe.

And like, it’s kind of hard because objectively, Binghe is a very dark character, so it doesn't feel particularly OOC to say he would do those things, but it's about framing. It bothers me when the emphasis is on how fucked up he is and not how hard he's trying, because it implies a level of futility that I just don’t think is there in canon. To me the beauty of him is in how much doing right by SQQ doesn't come naturally to him, but he ultimately decides to do it anyway because he wants SQQ to be happy. (I feel it needs to be said that I don't mean this in a judgy "if you write dark Binghe you don't understand him and are a bad person" way. Just that I myself can't handle that, and I strongly disagree if you think it's where Bingqiu's relationship is headed).

but idk, I've found my corner and I'm very happy here. I actually don't read fic as often as you'd think, mostly because I am sooooo picky, so I totally get where you're coming from :) but the fandom is still decently sized and very diverse, so there are always going to be at least a few people who share your feelings, if you can find them!

#svsss meta #anonymous #askbox #thank you for sharing your thoughts!! im sorry it took ages to reply #and that I mostly went on a tangent. again. idk what I'm saying half the time

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rumandcigaretes · 3 months

Text

Folks here we go!

Second charpter of "Bromance"

I sincerely hope you'll like what I've written, and that you'll let me know what you think <:

I'd also love to hear your ideas for the continuation.

What do you think should happen in Chapter Three?

What course do you think the relationship between Thomas and Alfie will take?

[Reminder: This fanfic is not canonical. In my concept, Thomas decides to forget about Grace and focus on his messed-up life. Of course, it's not that simple, but he decides to immerse himself in work. As a result, he re-establishes a partnership with Alfie Solomons. Both control a network of betting shops and, thanks to their influence, can decide on the winners - thus securing most of the profits. However, Thomas is haunted by demons from his past and falls into alcoholism. Drifting away from the partnership, he completely loses himself in self-destruction. Alfie wants to help him, not so much for his own good but for the sake of the partnership. However, things take a slightly different turn, which you can read about in this fanfic <;]

Okay now letsss go!!!

<Tw: alcoholism, some kind of sh, many swears, brinery> -> I think thats all but if it isn't, let me know!

Morning was cold. The bed he lay on felt almost like stone.

It was strange, though; within him arose a feeling of even greater emptiness. Something was missing.

But Shelby couldn't quite believe that the emptiness that had accompanied him for months had suddenly deepened.

He didn't cry for that bitch. He didn't cry for his father. He didn't even cry in and after Belfast.

Yet in that moment, a solitary tear rolled down his cheek.

So pathetic.

He knew what had happened. He remembered every moment, and even if his memory failed him, the muscles of his entire body painfully reminded him of last night's events.

Too much.

A piercing scream escaped his throat, and his hand painfully struck the bed frame.

Pain.

For a moment, the pain drowned out the emptiness.

So pathetic.

He was only pulled out of this horribly embarrassing state by the sound of opening doors. Before him stood the figure of a petite woman, scanning the room in fear.

Enormous anger boiled within him. How dare she enter without knocking?

He fixed his steely gaze on her. The woman immediately panicked, visibly eager to start a litany of apologies for her intrusion, but Thomas had no strength left for that.

"Get the fuck out," he growled, causing the woman to almost stumble over her own feet as she hurried out of the room.

As the door closed behind her, a string of curses poured from his lips.

What was he doing? Control was his strongest trait. And this? What was this?

He looked at his hand, noticing his knuckles were covered in blood. He sighed heavily as he sat up.

He was careful not to stain the sheets any further, well aware that traces of blood and semen would give the maids too much gossip fodder.

Although were the semen stains alone not already enough reason for gossip?

He grimaced, pretending not to care.

The journey to the bathroom was unpleasant. Pain in his lower body was clearly bothering him, but he tried his hardest to maintain shreds of dignity.

However, upon reaching the bathroom and casting a disdainful glance at his reflection in the mirror, even those shreds vanished.

What had he become?

His hips were covered in reddened bruises, which would likely only darken over time. His stomach still bore dried semen.

To make matters worse, a belt mark was especially noticeable around his mouth.

"Damn, did Clary notice?" raced through his mind, bringing a surge of anxiety.

He was pathetic.

With quick steps, he headed towards the shower, not wanting to look at himself any longer.

"I need to somehow massage this away."

They say warm water washes away shame.

Shelby definitely intended to test that.

The shower helped for a moment. The pain and self-disgust retreated a few steps, leaving only emptiness.

It wasn't unfamiliar to him, though, so he knew exactly how to effectively drown it out.

Fiery whiskey instead of breakfast was the best way to start the day.

He sat in the armchair where Alfie had found him yesterday. Essentially, the scene was the same as the day before. Him, whiskey, and empty whiskey bottles. A nice summary of Thomas "Fucking" Shelby.

He lit a cigarette to further poison the emptiness inside. Drag after drag, interrupted occasionally by a sip of alcohol. In fact, he had made some progress since he was using a glass.

He was only wondering what Clary was doing. She usually came around this time to ask what he wanted for breakfast. Although he usually replied that he already had everything he needed, the awareness that she hadn’t come that morning somewhat scared him.

Pathetic, Thomas Shelby afraid of what his housekeeper might think of him.

However, his fears were justified because rumors worked faster than anything else to damage one's reputation.

He got up from his seat and moved towards the bar.

Taking advantage of the opportunity, he glanced at his reflection in the mirror adorning the bar. He noted with a hint of relief that the mark from the strap had blended into his slightly darkened skin.

In reality, to see it, one had to look really closely, and after all, few people looked him straight in the face.

This calmed him a bit.

He resumed his intention and with a confident move opened the bar door. Behind one of the wine bottles, which he probably would never drink anyway, he found what he needed. Without much thought, he took out 20 shillings from his wallet. The cigarette he held in his mouth almost burned his lips.

He put the wallet back in its previous place, throwing the cigarette filter into a nearby ashtray.

He walked slowly towards the door leading to the corridor, first putting the extracted coins into his pants pocket.

"A bit of a nonchalant bribe, for me," he thought, smiling faintly.

He looked out into the corridor but saw no one. Most likely everyone was downstairs, but he decided not to bother going there.

"Clary, come to me!" he shouted, returning to his room.

How pathetic.

He cursed, falling heavily into the armchair.

After a short while, he heard a knock on the door.

"Come in," he commanded, pouring himself another serving of breakfast.

Clary entered the room. She was visibly stressed.

"Sit down," he pointed to the armchair right next to him. The woman quickly complied.

Shelby looked her over. He saw her fear.

"Who is downstairs?" he asked, lighting another cigarette and reclining in the chair.

After a few drags, however, he put it on the table.

She swallowed hard.

"Martha and Annie," the response was quick.

Shelby nodded.

"Since when have they been here?" he measured her with his gaze again.

Clary probably guessed what her employer might be concerned about.

"They just arrived, Mr. Shelby," her voice seemed calmer.

The man relaxed a bit at this information.

"Why didn't you come to ask what I want for breakfast?" he leaned towards her. He couldn't resist teasing her. It gave him a minimum of control. A minimum of satisfaction from having power over someone, over anything...

The maid lowered her gaze.

"I thought you didn't want to see me," her voice was stressed again.

Well, such a reaction was quite adequate - after all, she was dealing with unstable Thomas "Fucking" Shelby.

He reached towards his pocket, and the woman trembled.

"Listen to me carefully now," he looked her straight in the eyes, "Nothing happened this morning. You saw nothing and heard nothing. You'll also go to my bedroom now and take the sheets for washing. You are not to ask anything and comment on nothing. If I find out that anyone heard from you about this morning," he paused, clenching his lips tightly, "I will kill you."

As he said this, not a single muscle twitched on his face, and his gaze was fixed directly on the woman's irises.

The maid trembled again. She knew he wasn't joking. She couldn't utter a word, only nodded in understanding.

Shelby smiled falsely.

"Excellent. Here's something that might help you keep your mouth shut," he said, pressing the previously prepared 20 shillings into her hand.

He had forgotten about the lit cigarette that was sadly burning out on the table. He cast a longing glance in its direction.

Clary almost fainted. It wasn't good for her nerves. She jumped to her feet but put the entire amount into the pocket of her apron.

"I'll go take care of the sheets," she said, heading towards Shelby's bedroom. He merely nodded in her direction.

It seemed one problem was off his shoulders.

Now, he had to wait for the second, much more important one to resolve itself.

In this case, he wasn't really worried about anything.

Alfie was a reasonable guy and definitely wouldn't do anything stupid, as it would harm both Shelby and himself...

Although there was one thing with him that desperately wanted to be voiced.

That thing was the damn desire to control everything...

But in that matter, it wasn't possible. Shelby couldn't influence the Jew in any way.

After all, he didn’t intend to threaten him after he had dragged him to bed himself.

However, he also didn’t intend to ask him for anything – or rather, in this case, beg.

The boy's face twisted in a grimace of agony.

These thoughts hurt so damn much.

After all...

That evening changed nothing.

It couldn’t change anything...

No.

He just wanted it to be that way.

He was lying to himself.

The truth was that the evening spent in the long-haired man's arms changed something inside him.

It outlined a pattern that Shelby didn’t want to look at, fearing that what he would see would be so terrifying.

That was truly pathetic.

“Thomas fucking Shelby can’t come to terms with the disgusting truth about himself” – he laughed at the thought.

But this laugh was almost like crying.

He was exhausted.

The thoughts whirled so strongly in his head that it seemed to him as if he had been sitting in that armchair for ages. He was only snapped out of it by the silhouette of a woman quickly moving towards the exit of his room.

When she left, he noted with a hint of relief that he had gotten rid of that filthy bedding, which most likely still carried the scent of the bearded Jew.

He definitely didn’t intend to return to the bedroom anytime soon. Too much had happened there.

He grimaced at the memories of the previous night’s events.

His throat was dry, so he quickly reached for the whiskey bottle.

He took a big gulp.

“Fuck those glasses,” he thought, sighing heavily.

It was shaping up to be a horribly tough day.

He didn’t even notice when he drifted off. It was probably the bottle of whiskey, drunk in less than an hour, that had this effect on him.

He slowly rubbed his sleepy eyes.

He cast a bleary glance at the clock. It was nearing noon, so he would probably be able to have a proper drink at some pub.

He slowly got up from his seat, noticing a lot of white spots before his eyes.

“Fuck, I’m seeing white mice from all this,” ran through his mind.

He headed towards the door. After the morning adventure with Clary, he didn't want to see any of the maids.

Even though he had dealt with the matter, something in his head kept screaming that everyone knew what had happened the previous evening.

He tightly shut his eyes to cut off those thoughts.

After all, he was alone in his residence yesterday. He had long given up on 24-hour service. So why was he so worried?

He descended the stairs with a slightly unsteady gait, trying to be as quiet as possible.

It was absurd that Thomas "fucking" Shelby had to sneak around in his own house.

The realization made him smile sadly.

He didn't recognize himself.

…………

He breathed deeply when he managed to leave the apartment. The fresh air seemed almost strange to him.

He hadn’t gone out in a long time.

He shook his head as he walked down the road along the street.

As he walked, he felt somewhat uneasy. Random people greeted him or, conversely, avoided his gaze.

It always looked like this, but at that moment, he couldn’t shake the feeling that there was more to it.

“I’ve gone crazy” – This thought occasionally intruded into his mind, causing a grimace.

He had been grimacing a lot lately.

Mom wouldn’t have been pleased.

He felt definite relief at the sight of the dive bar where he liked to hang out when he didn't know what to do with himself.

Indeed, that day was precisely such a day.

With a quick movement, he opened the door, and the familiar smell of cheap cigarettes and stinking beer filled his nostrils.

It was pathetic, but he felt something calm down inside him at that smell.

He took his usual place right behind one of the screens. The bar was almost within reach, so without unnecessary fuss, he simply muttered to the bartender to bring a bottle of the best whiskey.

Of course, he knew that the best whiskey in this case meant some murky swill mixed with spirits, but he didn’t care much. In fact, the awareness that he would once again be able to drown himself in that crude alcohol almost comforted him.

“This will surely help me get through the day,” he thought.

He didn’t hold back. Glass after glass disappeared, and the thoughts seemed to become lighter. All fears vanished, leaving only that familiar emptiness.

Of two evils, this was the lesser one.

This state didn’t last long, as his attention was drawn to a familiar, mustachioed face that appeared at one of the tables.

It was Arthur.

“Fuck, what is he doing here?” he asked himself, feeling a surge of irritation.

He really didn’t want to see anyone he knew, let alone someone from his family.

Not that day.

Not after what had happened.

He swallowed with a sense of internal disgust.

What surprised him, however, was that Arthur completely didn’t notice his presence.

He looked as if he was waiting for someone.

The expression on his face also indicated that he had a specific purpose for being there.

Thomas couldn’t stop himself from glancing occasionally towards his table.

“Who is he waiting for?” – curiosity almost ate him up inside.

At the same time, fear sprouted in him that it might be related to the events of the previous evening.

“Maybe someone overheard him and Solomons and now wants to humiliate him in front of his older brother?

Maybe it’s Clary?”

With a slightly trembling hand, he refilled his glass and then drank its contents in one gulp.

Indeed, that filthy drink effectively dulled his nerves.

But even that swill couldn’t suppress the shock that came over him at the sight of the person heading towards Arthur’s table.

“That’s fucking Alfie” – his eyes almost popped out of their sockets.

His hands failed him, causing the contents of the freshly refilled glass to partially land on his pants.

He didn’t care at all.

A string of curses almost escaped his lips, but he quickly regained control of himself.

He had to focus and play this situation well.

Control.

That would save him…

There were many possibilities.

The worst-case scenario assumed that Alfie planned to ruin him in Arthur’s eyes by revealing what happened yesterday.

The best leaned towards the naive vision that the two men had simply met for a drink.

Shelby really wanted to believe that it was the latter that had brought them to this place.

However, he couldn’t do anything concrete to find out.

The most sensible approach was to simply watch the situation from a distance.

His position was ideal because the screen partially hid his figure while still allowing him to observe this unusual meeting.

He even decided not to indulge in any drinks during his observation to slightly improve his chances of reading anything from the behavior of the two men.

Interestingly, it didn’t seem like they were discussing anything particularly intriguing. However, Shelby knew his brother well enough to recognize that this seemingly nonchalant style of conversation was merely a cover. They must have been talking about something important.

Arthur’s face appeared normal, and the corners of his mouth occasionally curved into something resembling a smile.

It was quite obvious because conversations with Alfie were usually spiced with numerous jokes from him.

Shelby felt a very strong surge of panic.

“Fuck, I’m screwed,” he thought internally, but then he chuckled uncontrollably.

This thought led to another, which ironically expressed that yesterday he had someone in his ass.

He couldn’t see Alfie’s face clearly, as he was turned away from him. He could only fix his gaze on his massive shoulders, which by their very existence brought back memories of the previous night.

“Fuck,” he growled to himself in his thoughts.

He was so pathetic.

He lowered his gaze. He didn’t want to recall those memories.

Or maybe he didn’t want to want to recall those memories.

He felt disgusted with himself for almost looking at the bearded man with longing.

What was going on with him?

Could he really not even control himself anymore?

This morning, he couldn’t stand what had happened.

And now, when that man was sitting a few meters in front of him, he almost longed for those events.

For that touch.

For that smell.

“Fuck, enough!” – he scolded himself, turning his gaze back towards that particular table.

It looked like the conversation between the Jew and his brother was coming to an end because Arthur stood up slowly and began putting on the jacket he had previously hung on a nearby hook.

After dealing with the last button, he characteristically extended his hand to the seated man.

After exchanging a few more words with him, he simply headed towards the exit.

“What could they have been talking about?” – the question flashed through Thomas’s mind.

It definitely didn’t look like Alfie had told Arthur anything about their adventure last night, but he subconsciously felt that he had talked to him about something specific.

After all, why else would he meet him?

Was what they discussed important?

Did it concern him in any way?

The flurry of thoughts was interrupted by a movement from the Jew, who clumsily got up from his seat.

Just as he was about to avert his gaze to avoid being noticed, Alfie turned towards him.

He knew perfectly well that Shelby was there, sitting and watching their conversation.

“Fuck,” he muttered under his breath, pretending that the approaching man didn’t cause a surge of panic within him.

Alfie looked calm. Completely as if nothing had happened yesterday. His gaze was warm and his lips set in a straight line.

He was walking towards him.

Shelby didn’t even try to pretend he didn’t see him anymore.

It wouldn’t make sense.

“May I?” Alfie’s voice was friendly.

Shelby nodded in approval.

He didn’t really have a choice.

He decided that if he was really going to talk to this guy again, he definitely needed a drink.

He grabbed the bottle to pour himself the last bit of its contents into his glass, but his hand was stopped by the older man’s hand.

“I think you’ve had enough,” he muttered, sounding somewhat concerned.

Shelby was irritated. What the fuck did he think?

“Fuck off,” he growled, grabbing the bottle firmly and gulping down its contents.

Now they could talk.

“What do you want?” he snapped at the older man with a piercing but slightly glazed look. He tried to show as much as possible that what had happened didn’t affect him at all, that he was still the same.

Alfie looked him straight in the eyes. It was somewhat awkward.

Suddenly, Thomas felt a touch on his calf.

He flinched as if burned, looking down.

It was the older man’s boot. This peculiar move made Shelby feel a wave of breathlessness.

He looked at Alfie distrustfully.

“I want to help you, Tommy,” he whispered, leaning towards the brunette.

His foot began to dangerously slide up the younger man’s leg.

In fact, Alfie himself didn’t know why he made such a move.

Thomas couldn’t stand it. With a sudden gesture, he pushed away the older man’s boot, but he didn’t give up and firmly pressed his foot on his.

“What the hell is he doing?” ran through his mind.

“You’re full of shit, Solomons. At most, you want to help YOURSELF, but at my expense,” he panted, sounding sadder than he intended.

Alfie tilted his head like puppies do when they look at something that interests them.

A mischievous smile crept onto his lips.

“As for the first part, not today,” he winked at the blue-eyed man, which might have embarrassed him if he wasn’t so drunk.

Once again, Alfie was surprised by his own move. Although it was his style – turning everything into a joke because it made things easier. Right?

If looks could kill, Alfie would have dropped dead at that moment.

“Are you out of your mind? What the fuck are you doing?” Now it was Shelby who leaned towards the older man. He was truly angry.

But in that anger, something incredibly inappropriate was sprouting.

Alfie smiled indulgently.

Completely as if he sensed that inappropriateness.

“Let me help you,” he said, reaching under the table to place his hand on the younger man’s knee.

He was testing how far he could go.

But why?

He didn’t know himself.

Thomas felt like his knee was almost burning from that touch.

Yet he didn’t push his hand away.

Something in him couldn’t do it and wanted to savor the contact.

Once again, he didn’t know which time that day, he felt pathetic.

But he could admit that he maintained control because he chose this touch.

That was more important to him.

Alfie, as if sensing the boy’s emotions, gently stroked his knee.

Shelby shamefully admitted that his touch was warmly soothing.

What the fuck had happened to him?

He hung his head sadly.

He had lost.

At that moment, he didn’t even care about that fucking control anymore.

He wanted to wake up….

He hoped it was just a dream…

But when that didn’t work, he simply decided to ask the question that had been hanging in the air.

“What were you talking to Arthur about?” he asked without even looking in his direction. He really didn’t care anymore.

Solomons looked around, making sure there was no one nearby who could notice them. When he noted they were indeed almost alone and the bartender was busy cleaning tables, he reached with his remaining hand towards Thomas's chin. He lifted it gently, forcing him to look at him.

The boy shivered. It was too much.

"Don't touch me," he growled, pulling away from him. Yet immediately, he felt a familiar emptiness. Damn, did that touch really help him that much? He bit the inside of his cheek, trying to ignore the increasingly inappropriate feeling.

"I can't handle this," he muttered to himself, knowing why. It was like an impulse. He just couldn't keep it in any longer.

Alfie nodded. "I know, that's why I talked to Arthur," he replied, straightening in his chair.

Thomas was stunned. What's happening? The image seemed to blur before him.

"What?" he asked, completely thrown off. Control... He needed control...

Solomons shrugged. "Should I be honest or nice?" he asked, taking out a familiar cigarette case from his vest pocket. Thomas licked his lips at the sight. Warmth spread in his stomach and his muscles tensed.

The older man didn't miss this. "Want a smoke?" he asked, perfectly aware of what he was doing. He was maliciously testing the younger man's boundaries. A wicked smile crept onto his pale-red lips framed by stubble.

He was acting like he'd gone mad. Mad for the younger one...

"Fuck, this is absurd," he cursed himself inwardly, but didn't let it show at all.

He really didn't understand himself anymore.

Shelby, however, didn't let himself be fooled. "Talk about what you discussed with Arthur," he said dryly. He had to push away memories stirred by the sight of that familiar cigarette case, containing indeed delicious cigarettes.

Something flashed in the older man's eye at his reaction. He lit his cigarette.

"So, should I be honest," he took a deep drag, "You're a wreck, Tommy. Impossible to work with. For a while now, you've done nothing but get drunk and cause trouble when you do. You know it, I know it. Arthur and I have been in touch about this for a while. We gave you time. We hoped you'd get it together. But clearly, you didn't. So today, I made the final decision. I wanted to tell Arthur myself. I figured this would be the most convenient place. And something told me I'd find you here today," he delivered the whole monologue, simultaneously enjoying his cigarette and never breaking eye contact with the shocked and enraged boy in front of him.

"He knew that Shelby wouldn't like this turn of events, but he knew it was best for the company and its interests. They had already lost too much due to the recklessness of the younger one.

Indeed, Shelby seemed to deflate. "Are you fucking kidding me?! US!" he shouted, lunging towards his partner.

They were lucky the dive bar they were in wasn't the quietest place, so that one shout didn't change anything.

Alfie remained unfazed. He simply continued smoking his cigarette. "Calm down," he said after a moment. "This is for your own good," he had to be firm. He knew this was the only way to make a difference.

Shelby couldn't believe what he was hearing. Was he some fucking child that decisions had to be made for him about what was good or not? He was supposed to be the master of his own fate. By what right did this bastard interfere in his life? Who did he think he was?

It wasn't even anger. It was pure fucking rage. What's worse, it was fueled by quite a bit of alcohol.

"I'll kill you," he growled, nearly spitting on the older man. But then a chill ran down his spine as he realized he had just had the opportunity to threaten someone like that today.

"If I keep killing them all like this, I'll run out of hands," a sarcastic comment floated through his mind stream. Shelby let it pass.

Alfie just laughed at his partner's reaction. "Try it," he said again, taking another drag from his cigarette. "You wouldn't be able to do it, Tommy," he paused, blowing the smoke straight into the younger man's face. Almost like yesterday. "You'd miss me too much."

He was certain this would break his resistance. A slight smile crept onto his lips. It was gentler but warm.

Thomas looked at him, and despite his lingering anger, he seemed to feel a sense of contentment. He liked that smile, and he saw it so rarely... He stared a moment too long because Alfie shook his head with pity.

"I knew it," he muttered, sending the younger man a piercing glance. "Tell me, how long have we known each other?" The question was completely unexpected, but it flowed smoothly from the Jew's lips. Perhaps he wanted to change the subject to calm Shelby down a bit. Of course, Shelby immediately saw through this intention, but he didn't resist. Lately, he had been torn between extremes-either

incredibly irritated and stimulated or tired

and submissive to the point of pain.

Literally.”

Perhaps at that moment, fatigue took over the helm.

With a somber look, he regarded his partner's face.

Cold Bastard Shelby again.

Classic move.

"It's been about 2 years, mate," he replied. Although he casually continued the conversation, something inside him, despite the fatigue and indifference he exuded, wanted this conversation to continue. Deep down, he almost begged for it.

"Pathetic asshole," he thought.

Even the desire for control seemed to fade away. At that moment, he was even inclined to let Solomon lead the entire conversation just to keep it going.

The Jew nodded. The cigarette in his mouth was almost burnt out, so he reached for the ashtray to extinguish it.

Shelby stopped him with his hand.

"I'd gladly finish it," he took the cigarette from his hand, savoring the moment their fingers touched.

It was almost exhilarating.

His move was an abstraction, yet it's worth noting that lately, most of his actions were like that.

More impulsiveness.

Less control.

He grimaced slightly at this realization but masked it with the cigarette, which he brought lovingly close to his lips.

Alfie observed him with considerable surprise. Honestly, something in the brunette's demeanor instilled fear in him. Shelby acted as if he had lost his mind.

He was drinking more than usual, avoiding contact with clients. He even stopped controlling the operations.

It was so unlike him.

What happened to the guy who shook his hand so firmly two years ago that he almost left bruises on it?

With shame, he admitted he missed that Thomas.

And now all he had left was Tommy.

Lost, messed up, drowned in drink, and confused Tommy whom he would have to save, willing or not.

Although did he really have to?

Or maybe the events of last night affected him so much.

Did by taking Shelby under his wing, he sign a pact with the devil?

Or perhaps he felt obligated to save him?

Or worse, did he feel such a need?

After all, why would he be talking to him now if not of his own volition, wanting to pull him out of the shitstorm he was in?

Why did he plan it all, starting much earlier than when they went to bed together?

But will saving this asshole from the quagmire require too much?

And yet he did it, just by talking to Arthur enough. He lightened Thomas' load enough for him to pull himself together...

Why did he talk to him?

Why did he touch him?

He grimaced. He didn't like those thoughts at all.

The younger man raised his eyebrows in surprise. The cigarette he had taken had long been extinguished in the nearby ashtray, and his gaze had been fixed on the contemplative Jew for a while now. He wanted to know what the other man was thinking so intensely.

"What's wrong?" he blurted out, trying to sound as indifferent as possible.

Excitement was getting the better of him again.

"What the fuck is happening to me," he growled in his head.

Alfie shook his head in a dismissive gesture.

"It doesn't matter," he rubbed his face with his hand.

It was probably time to leave this place.

"I'll go now," he wanted to get up, but Shelby's foot came down firmly on his shoe.

"What is he doing?" he asked himself inwardly, while at the same time staring in surprise at the blue-eyed man.

He looked into his eyes, but after a moment he regretted it.

Shelby was scared.

He saw it in his eyes.

He was definitely scared.

He saw it for a brief moment, but he was sure he saw fear in his eyes.

But why?

Thoughts swirled in his mind.

After all, he wasn't his nanny.

After all, he was

Nobody

Until yesterday...

The whole situation seemed to overwhelm him.

It was probably too much responsibility.

Comforting this jerk for a moment was even pleasant, but babysitting him full-time?

Definitely not a vision Alfie would allow himself to be swept into.

But could he realistically decide about it?

After all, everything around him was happening as it pleased, and he just tried to grab onto anything.

Just to survive.

The younger man didn't know what he was doing. He was weak.

He felt it deep inside. Something in him broke.

Was it the alcohol?

Something was messing with his senses so much that all he could read was fear.

Fear of being left alone with himself.

He didn't want to be alone.

Not after he felt he didn't have to be alone.

It was pathetic, but stopping Alfie, he wanted to convey that to him.

He wished the other man was sharp enough to read it from him.

Anything to avoid having to say it out loud.

But nothing happened. The bearded man just looked at him in surprise, while fear gripped his body more and more.

"Fuck," he muttered aloud. His tone was almost desperate. Something bad was happening to him.

She was even more frightened at the thought that at that moment she would even ask the older person to stay with him.

He really was pathetic.

Thomas' condition made the Jew fight his thoughts. After all, he couldn't leave this jerk in such a state.

"I'll take you home, Tommy," he squeezed out after a while.

Of all the options, this seemed the most sensible to him.

The least binding.

However, the younger man shook his head.

"No. It's better if you don't show up there," he lowered his head so the other couldn't look into his eyes.

A wave of shame mixed with fear, creating an almost deadly mix.

He felt the urge to drink again. Out of the corner of his eye, he sadly glanced at the empty bottle.

Alfie sighed heavily. He was tired of all this mess. But in the end, he wanted to play the hero himself.

He sat down next to him and offered help himself.

He planned it himself.

Maybe it couldn't be taken back.

This jerk wouldn't admit it himself, but the Jew knew that Shelby involuntarily trusted him a little more than he wanted.

"Alright," he muttered resignedly. "Get yourself together. I'll host you at my place."

Well, it was already too late to back out.

Hopefully, all this mess was worth it.

.......

The road to the older man's apartment passed fairly quickly. Shelby walked a few steps behind Alfie, so it didn't look suspicious.

All the way, he tried to ignore strange thoughts about being observed.

After all, they were just thoughts, right?

The older man didn't turn towards him, just walked confidently towards a place known only to him.

It was strange; they had been working together for a few years now, yet Shelby had never been to his place.

He smiled gently.

"There always has to be a first time," a silly thought popped into his head.

They passed a few turns to find themselves on a small promenade where cafes and something like a wine bar were located.

Thomas frowned. He didn't expect his partner to live in such an area.

He didn't dwell on it for too long because Alfie's figure disappeared into one of the entrances leading to the upper parts of the promenade.

He didn't hurry too much, not wanting to be taken for suspicious. Only after a short while of staring at one of the bushes adorning the entrance to the cafe, he glanced at his watch with a nonchalant gesture.

Classic move.

After this measured gesture, he walked briskly towards the entrance behind which the older man had disappeared a few moments ago.

Immediately after crossing the threshold, he saw a row of stairs that clearly led to the residential floors.

He followed them upstairs, assuming he would find the Jew there.

He wasn't wrong. Alfie was waiting for him right by one of the entrances, most likely leading to his apartment.

He shook his head at the sight of the younger man.

"You really don't have to try that hard," he chuckled. "These people don't give a damn where you're going or why. They have enough of their own problems."

As he said this, he aimed the key at the lock hole and turned it smoothly twice.

He opened the door, hiding the key in the pocket of his coat.

Shelby observed him closely.

The older man's words seemed to make him feel foolish.

With all his might, however, he tried to push away these strange emotions.

After all, it didn't matter anyway.

He entered the apartment behind Alfie, waiting meekly for him to close the door behind them.

He didn't feel confident enough to peek inside the room himself, but the hallway where they stood convinced him that his partner indeed had good taste.

The neighborhood might not have been very interesting, but the decor made up for this shortcoming.

In fact, it even added color to the whole place.

These thoughts relaxed the younger man a bit. He turned his gaze towards Alfie, who was kissing his hand and then placed it on a small case hanging next to the right door frame.

It surprised him a bit, but he didn't say anything. The older man, after making that gesture, looked at him expectantly.

Thomas didn't know what was going on. He raised an eyebrow in a questioning gesture, to which Alfie encouragingly waved his hand towards him.

"Come here," he instructed, and Shelby immediately responded.

"Give me your right hand," another command to which Thomas responded without blinking.

After all, no one could see them there.

The Jew gently took his partner's hand, bringing it to his lips. He placed a soft kiss on his fingers, then guided his hand towards the case.

Again, Thomas didn't know what guided him.

The younger man didn't resist. He tried to ignore the fact that his fingers burned as if touched by live fire.

Was it because of those lips or maybe the unfortunate case?

"Is this some kind of tradition?" he muttered, not wanting to appear uncultured.

Alfie smiled warmly.

"It's a Mezuzah, Tommy," he replied as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.

Seeing that his companion didn't seem to understand much, he added:

"Jews who adhere to tradition place a fragment of the Torah in the Mezuzah. When entering or leaving the house, they send a kiss towards it as a sign of greeting or farewell to God. In your case, this gesture signifies the acceptance of hospitality in my home," he said, then gently touched the boy's shoulder.

Somehow, he couldn't resist touching him on every occasion.

"Make yourself at home.”

Shelby shivered. Every touch from that man sent sparks through him like embers flying from a firepit. What was worse, he didn't know if it truly bothered him. Perhaps Alfie was his firepit? He grimaced at the thought.

A moment passed before the older man released his shoulder, hung up his coat and hat on the rack to their right. Right after that, he walked past him towards the kitchen. He decided to simply ignore that small grimace.

Shelby followed him, also hanging up his jacket and cap. Upon reaching the kitchen, he settled into one of the dining chairs. He had already had a few drinks that day, but he hoped for a taste of Solomon's famous rum. Subconsciously, though, he knew such an offer wouldn't come. Alf was the last person who would offer him alcohol at that moment.

Maybe he was losing his mind, but something in his head interpreted Alfie's reluctance to let him drink as a sign of concern.

An abstract thought. Someone cared about Thomas, fucking Shelby.

A crooked smile twisted his lips at that thought. It didn't escape the bearded man's notice, who had been observing him attentively for a while.

"What's amusing you?" he asked, expecting an interesting answer.

Shelby shook his head.

"Nothing," he grinned broadly at his partner. Somehow, he was feeling happier.

Alfie looked at him indulgently before turning towards the fridge.

"Have you eaten anything today?" he asked over his shoulder, pulling out a large ovenproof dish.

Shelby became slightly embarrassed. What the fuck did this guy care if he had eaten? It wasn't his concern.

Despite his subconscious aversion to such questioning, something inside him again attributed this to a form of care from the Jew.

At that moment, however, he didn't smile at the thought; rather, he grimaced in disgust.

"I ate," he lied effortlessly, watching his partner closely.

Alfie smirked mischievously.

"Too bad. I already set some aside for you," he nodded towards the plate with a large piece of what resembled cake.

Shelby grimaced. He didn't care for sweets.

"No need. You know I prefer rum in my tiramisu," he allowed himself a small smile, hoping the other would let it go.

But that didn't happen because after a moment, the long-haired man sat at the table, serving Thomas a plate and a dish with sauce.

Shelby examined the dish. He was surprised it wasn't the cake he had expected. The whole thing looked like cheesy mashed potatoes. The younger man grimaced almost like a child who didn't want to eat something green.

Alfie laughed. This brat could touch him in this bizarre way with his amazement.

However, the awareness of this fact wasn't as funny to the Jew. He gritted his teeth harder, trying to ignore the growing anxiety within him.

He didn't want to get attached. To anything. To anyone.

That wasn't his story.

He rolled his eyes.

"It's kugel, not some cake. Stop pouting and eat, or I'll be offended," he grumbled, pushing the plate almost against the boy's chest.

It seemed he had no choice. After all, his grimaces couldn't overshadow his impeccable manners.

The first bite was strange. He probably had never eaten anything like it before. However, that didn't mean he didn't like it. On the contrary, with each forkful, he realized how hungry he was and how much he liked this peculiar delicacy.

"A liquid diet definitely doesn't suit me in the long run," he thought.

Alfie smiled to himself, absorbing the magical sight of this usually cold bastard who was currently devouring the food like a small, innocent child.

With a swift motion, the older man reached for the sauce pitcher.

"This will make it even better," he declared, pouring a generous portion of sauce over the remaining kugel.

It was so strange. These two had never felt this comfortable in each other's company before.

That evening seemed to have sealed a strange pact between them.

A pact that unconsciously obligated Solomon to almost paternal care over the younger man.

That perfectly explained his behavior.

But what about Shelby?

Did it obligate him to be submissive to the bearded Jew?

It was ridiculous.

Shelby always managed on his own. He had mechanisms in place that didn't include supervision.

So why did it seem to him that deepening this fucking void inside him had something to do with being deprived of the whip that belonged to Alfie?

He grimaced.

Here's the translation:

The older man tilted his head, almost offended. "Don't you like it?" he asked gloomily.

Shelby turned towards him. Something in the older man's expression amused him greatly.

But he wanted to hide it because he knew that laughter could offend him even more.

Although... Did it really matter to him that much?

He couldn't resist, and a quiet snort escaped his lips, resulting in an even more disgusted look from the Jew.

"Don't eat if you don't want to," he reached out to take the plate from him.

To his surprise, he felt resistance.

"No. It's quite good, thank you," he said, pulling the plate closer to himself to resume eating.

Indeed, the sauce made the whole thing taste more substantial.

Alfie raised an eyebrow in surprise. "You're acting insane," he remarked.

Shelby smiled to himself. "Maybe I am?" he replied, more to himself than to him, but that didn't change the fact that the older man shook his head in dismay.

"Don't talk like that, Tommy," this time, the endearment from him didn't seem derogatory but rather comforting.

Strange. It was so damn strange for both of them.

Shelby adjusted himself in the chair, finishing the remainder of his meal and setting down his fork.

He fixed his slightly blurry eyes on the older man.

"What's going on?" he asked as if absent-mindedly. He didn't even know if he asked the question deliberately.

Alfie furrowed his brows. "Right now, we're sitting in my apartment," he said, slightly surprised but with a hint of irony. The state of the boy in front of him started to give him chills again, so sarcasm seemed like a good solution.

Shelby licked his lips.

"But what's happening between us?" This time, he asked the question completely consciously, and the gaze he stubbornly fixed on the man in front of him only reinforced the idea that it was up to him to answer that question.

The devil was in the fact that he himself didn't know what was happening between them.

He sighed heavily, holding back from swearing.

"I don't know, Thomas," he replied, breaking the growing silence.

He hoped Shelby might respond with something concrete. But it didn't happen.

The brunette lowered his head in resignation.

No one said anything for a long time.

Then suddenly, Shelby's voice pierced the apartment.

"I can't get rid of you," his voice was hollow.

Alfie furrowed his brows. He didn't say anything, feeling that what the younger man had to say wasn't over yet.

He was right, as a muffled voice once again filled the space.

"Not even now," he said, raising his head to look directly into the older man's eyes.

The Jew was confused.

"What the hell does he mean?" he thought, but images from the previous evening flashed through his mind in an instant.

But it couldn't be about that, could it?

"I got what I wanted, and yet I'm still," he interrupted himself, regaining some awareness. He didn't want to finish that sentence.

Unfortunately for him, Solomon wasn't going to let him off so easily. He looked at him meaningfully, raising his eyebrows expectantly.

Shelby forced a half-smile on himself.

" Still hungry," he smoothly threw out. Almost as if he had wanted to say that from the beginning.

Suddenly, he felt an unexpected touch on his hand, which he had just laid on the table.

It was the long-haired man and his strong hand that caused this sensation.

Alfie was stirred by the blond's words. Some unimaginable fever that no compress could cure or even ease.

Something wanted him to immediately throw himself at this blue-eyed boy and shower him with kisses, yet another part whispered to him to hit him with all his might in that rather handsome face.

He felt like a toy.

And the worst part was that he seemed to enjoy this role.

After all, from the beginning, he was just a pawn in Shelby's game.

A pawn or a toy... It was all the same.

He squeezed the boy's hand tighter as he continued to stare at the source of the warm touch.

"Maybe I can feed you," Alfie whispered unexpectedly, cutting through the air and causing almost overwhelming waves of heat in Thomas.

"What the fuck is he talking about?" the younger man's brain couldn't comprehend what was happening.

Alfie had really lost himself in the fever caused by this brat.

He was scared by this fact, but he himself was beginning to feel hungry.

"Will you allow me to do that, Tommy?" he asked, wanting to get an answer as quickly as possible.

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