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kalims · 2 years

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˃ ᵕ ˂ . . "who i like? do you seriously think I'm gonna tell you that? anyways its—"

大好き

premise. someone asks who you like.. and you respond with their name—said person right beside you!

characters. all dorms and their prominent students

includes. gn reader

note. after a long wait! and the almost month this has been on my 'to be added' category it's hereeee.. fun fact.. I actually finished another work because I liked the idea of it more even though this was my prioritized.

was 20 mins late because I was fixing my posts aksbja

heartslabyul

looks at you like you're insane. I'm confident everyone can envision riddle's face like that. it's in between the verge of being flustered and being appalled by your lack of filter. heat practically steams out of riddle's ears as his movements stutters, clearly struggling to comprehend what you said. maybe you should get ready for an earful but you're pleasantly suprised when riddle sets aside his.. passionate emotions to shyly ask a confirmation. (with admitted aggression as if he's in denial)

trey's eyebrows shoot up but the action looks way more casual than it should be. I mean, surprisingly he's pretty calm on taking it into account but he ends up just being a smiling fool beside you as you continue your conversation with your friend. he's like... ‎◜◡◝ beside you as your friend looks between the two of you in a hurry before breaking into a laugh. should be be worried that you're this bold..? well, it did work in his favor so he can't say a thing.

happy go luck cater looks even more happy than you've ever seen him in your life. hanging lowly by his sides, his hands twitch and he itches to pull out his phone to basically renounce to the world that his feelings are very much reciprocated and probably lowkey shitting on the people with one sided loves because, ha! he wins!! you bet he's gonna settle for screaming in his private account and then proceeding to scream in his pillow.

before he could foster up a grin and break out of the 'calm and responsible' honor student, deuce had to keep his lower lips under his teeth lest he looks like a weirdo smiling uncontrollably tinged in flush. the whole time he was just staring at you goofily.. like he's on cloud nine, which I concur. because he is. the one who gets gaslighted (not by you) into thinking that you both now are in a relationship like.. deuce be for real you didn't even ask me on a fate. (actually both of you might think you're in a relationship because of the way you're acting like yall are)

contrary to beliefs I think ace would be on the more casual side. you know? throwing an arm around your shoulder and shattering whatever personal space criteria there was. clearly there's no need when you 'like' him so much. he's using your words as an excuse to do whatever he wants, like leaning strangely close, letting a hand linger longer than it should. whatever restraint he had before is gone now because now he's moving onto a new level of personal. you'd either hate or secretly like the change. hate because ace wtf we're in class and like because,, who wouldn't want your crush to be overly affectionate with you?

savanaclaw

you'd think leona wasn't listening at all just from the indifferent look on his face but you know better just from the way his eyes perk up, tail sticking up in dormant but still a signal of alert and attention. for once he doesn't quip a tease, or a smart-ass remark that would want you to shovel your way to the ground on embarrassment. he just.. sits there, staring seemingly into the void of thin air itself. maybe it's because he's feeling particularly sentimental or sensitive today that his heart feels like it's encased in warmth. it feels good.

a laugh too shaky for his preferences, ruggie hopes he didn't look too nervous for his sake. I mean, this is literally his suprise of the century and when I tell you that it's a big shock to him, it's an understatement. come on, if he did think you had feelings for him ruggie imagined the confession going normally. either buttering him up or going straight to the point—the latter, which he prefers but when he said to be direct he certainly didn't expect this! the hyena runs away with jitters and a skip to his steps but he comes back a few minutes later looking more relaxed than you've ever seen him.

once again. contrary to expectations which the savanclaw boys had practically shattered those, many would think jack would go all shy. from the previous savanaclaw boys you'd think I'd go against expectations again but you're.. wrong hehe. i don't know how to explain other than he wills himself to show a reaction other than fluster, maybe it's just in his pride to now show you an ounce of weakness but literally how could be when you're the weakness? he doesn't know if you making him soft is good or not.

octavinelle

if it was real and possible to actually happen without a third party force, azul's glasses would've definitely shattered the moment you said the direct confession. he's torn between wanting to excuse himself to scream like a school girl or intent to not let the fluster show. well, either way he does both. keeping his emotions hardly in check, sometimes slipping up multiple times but when the time comes where you both part ways you know he's silently smiling to himself when he turns round a corner. the twins are suspicious and curious as to why azul had been in a good mood nowadays..

either jade maintains his cool, natural closed eyed smile or he crinkles his eyes when he breaks into a large sharp toothed grin. of course both has the lingering ominous feeling around it because it's jade.. and even you have to agree that him openly cracking a grin isn't exactly a good sign of peace, rather so a harbinger of trouble. if you were bold enough to say that in his presence I wonder how that previous confidence will fare when he's practically picking at your earlier words to gouge a reaction. no jade, I only said like. not love (yet).

no one other than floyd would be more than ecstatic. he didn't hear it at first, blinking then tilting his head to the side when he pauses to register it. so when he finally processes it you bet he's giggling in his head but in real time? he's practically sweeping you off your feet to hug you in the air. figures with the strange merman strength.. you find out that floyd is quite clingy when he's immensely happy, he even refused to let you go through classes and when you insisted he just sat down next to your seat and promptly kicked out whoever sat there before! floyd atleast hide! I mean the professor would surely notice the eel that's not in supposed to be in their class.

scarabia

if there was an option where he could purchase everything in the world then giving it to you without expecting anything back kalim would surely choose it. you got him so happy to the fact that he's willing to do practically anything that you ask. he doesn't mean to be over the top but.. he just wants to make you happy, which is more than you deserve. no matter how many times you tell him that you don't need any gifts but rather him only, it seemed like it only did worse since he practically fell a hundred times harder which brings us to the conclusion that he wants to give you the world a whole lot more now..

a complete opposite of kalim. jamil merely blinks and casts you a side eye. for the record, he is a little impressed you're that bold because if it was him he would've just brushed this person away or claimed that he liked no one but here you are. completely obliterating the concept of secrets. perhaps that's why he likes you in the first place, your personality is certainly a force to reckon with.. but sometimes you just have to tone down the chaos.. *please* 😐

pomefiore

vil is no stranger to bold proclamations but he can't deny he's a little startled. well, he didn't pick you out to be that type of person. either way usually he'd plaster a quick smile, the words not hitting anything other than the skin of his heart. strangely enough he can't keep the smile wider than he'd like off his face, he's immensely pleased by your words and pomefiore has never been so happy by the obvious good mood their dorm leader had. cause he left them alone for the whole day to practice stick to your side.

his eyes immediately crinkle in joy, rook has to look away and cover the lower part of his face to shy away the flush in his cheeks that would give away his thoughts. rook wouldn't mind if you knew how he felt, but this time he feels as though he's doing this to contain the excitement off his face. you can practically hear the tremble in his voice as he giggles out. "oh tricheur ! mon coeur bat pour toi dans ma poitrine!" it looks like rook completely forgot to existence of the person right next to you. if he got madol from the amount of times he practically sang of his love for you rook would be rich.

just like any other time where you say something off handed epel quickly goes out of character and nearly screams. asking, shaking your shoulders, out of breath by the amount of times he aggressively shook you for the answer of "really?!" his voice becomes that of a boy you aren't used to, but if he's really that willing to show you the person he truly is it makes you like him more. if you do agree, admittedly with your surroundings growing distorted he yells out a happy "YESSS." then coughs and resumes to his soft persona like he wasn't the complete opposite a minute ago. (the person that asked was shook)

ignihyde

it's hard to say if idia is actually gonna be next to you since,, he's idia and do you really think he'd entertain the thought of being in a conversation with someone who he doesn't know? so let's just pretend his tablet is floating next to you, it's better than nothing you guess. you spared a glance to the electronic when you literally confessed your type, idia himself fitting the category perfectly. you swore you heard a squeak but ehh.. maybe it was a rat or something.

meanwhile. ortho comes inside idia's room expecting his elder brother to just be sitting on his bed, gaming chair or something but no. idia shroud is on the floor, with his headphones hazzardly over the floor like it fell over when he did. his hair is sprawled around the floor, heating into a concerning passionate pink as he rolls around and... squeals..? just from the headphones ortho can vaguely hear a "my type..? oh you know idia? I'd kill to have a boyfriend like him." playing on repeat.

diasomnia

he would be like: ˘ ˘ and then: ‎◜◡◝ after he hears you. if there a sound for a big, happy dragon malleus would be excluding them. when I tell you he wishes nothing but to just whisk you away on spot he's not kidding, unlike everyone else who unintentionally forgot the person who asked. this man forgets them intentionally because he can't keep his eyes off you like.. 'hey other human. me and my child of man are having a moment here. will you please leave now. did you not get the sign'

giggles but with his deep voice it sounds kinda weird, but nice to the ears nonetheless. lilia labels you as his main target now, perhaps scaring you shitless at the random times is his love languange because he does it a lot. don't worry though, he always says a half hearted apology with a smile and showers you with affection right after. how could you be mad with how he treats you? even though he cares for you after you can't help but pray that the glint you saw in the ceiling was just some shiny thing.. maybe malleus got it from him because he doesn't care for the other person too.

sebek scolds you period. not only have you mentioned his name (which he's embarrassingly torn between being disgusted and fluster) but you've also mentioned that he's your type?? but I honestly think he approves your taste. "OF COURSE I am the ideal man! I applaud you for once human. not everyone can see the value of loyalty and devotion to waka-sama!" he says but with the increasing pink in his face you know better than to think that it's for the sole reason of malleus.

with the increasing time you've both spent together, silver has practically devoted himself to following you around whenever he's awake. (sebek says something about him always needing to be by malleus' side but quickly shuts up after silver comments that sebek is more than capable to look after him) the surroundings are growing hazy when you say it but he hears it nonetheless. he's happy to say that he dreamt a pleasing dream he's ever gotten in a long time. and since you were in it, it's safe to say that he's positively infatuated now.

clarifications

translation for rook is,, "oh trickster! my heart beats for you in my chest!"

I connected ignihyde parts since I REFUSE to leave out ortho!!

I really liked how those ^ parts came out. my favorite actor cause I think it's cute for idia to be freaking out like that lolol. especially with the idea of recording of your voices to listen to cause he's that down bad

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pearlfeline · 3 months

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rookie

peter parker x fem!reader

word count: 900+

tw: black eye

a/n: this is short and it was in my drafts forever. and it was shorter than this before i added some stuff last night. posting it now for some validation and i want to feel better for my job interview tomorrow lol. hope its good enough.

“plwase unlokc your window!! OMW”

“I told him not to text and swing.” You mumbled to yourself.

You huffed, making your way to the window to save him the trouble and just lifted it wide open.

Peter flops in immediately, earning a yelp from you.

“Are you crazy?!” You held your hand to your chest.

“Heeeeelp.” He groans. Peter tugs at his mask, rolling his head back for you to see.

He had a black eye. “Make sure when you fall, you don’t land face first into a fire hydrant.” He tries his best to pry his swollen eye open.

“Since when do you fall?” You shake your head. Not expecting an answer, you walk off to the kitchen and open the freezer, grabbing a bag of assorted frozen fruit.

You come back to Peter flipping through channels on your TV, slumped on the bed.

“Put this on your eye.”

Peter gingerly takes the bag, holding it up to his bruise.

”Why are you getting hurt in the middle of the night?”

“Avengers make mistakes too.” He grumbled.

“Peter. It’s late.” You sighed.

“I know I know but I needed your help specifically.” He sits up mirroring the posture of someone who would hold a corporate meeting.

“Do my makeup please.”

You stare at Peter expressionless.

“Like with the skin paint thing.” He adds.

“For your black eye?”

“PLEEEAAASE! I can’t have May see me with another black eye. She said if the kids keep picking on me she’s gonna call the school.”

You roll your eyes, motioning him to follow you to your makeup drawer.

“Concealer.” You handed him the small bottle and heard him repeat after you.

“Concealer.” He nods.

“How long will this last?” He twists it open.

“Stop, you’re gonna dry it out. And not forever. So I’ll let you borrow it to reapply in the morning.”

“How do I do that?” He starts blinking rapidly the same time your finger pats into his under eye.

“No blinking! Just do what I’m doing here. See? You don’t even need a sponge sometimes.”

You try to ignore how close you were to him. Seeing Peter from this proximity was something you’d never think to do. You never noticed how many little freckles he had. They’re so faint. He had a little stubble from running around all day and chapped lips. Your eyes follow the line of his bottom lip, like a crack in the pavement. You could feel his breathing hit your hand as you pat into his skin. As you look up from his lips, you find him staring at you back.

“Done.” You reeled your hand back, clearing your throat.

Peter looks at himself through your small light up mirror. Seems simple enough.

“See? Good as new. Just a little swollen.” You comb his curl away from his forehead so he could clearly see the coverage.

“You’re the best.” He stares at his reflection in awe.

“I know.” You shrugged.

“Don’t touch it or it’ll come off.” You grab a small pouch to put the concealer in.

“Here. Don’t lose it. I splurged for this one.” You hand him the pouch and he nods profusely.

“Guarding it with my life.” He puts it in the small pocket of his backpack.

“Thank you.” He smiles.

“No problem.” You avoided his eyes, hopefully he didn’t see the heat rising to your cheeks. “Don’t keep May waiting.”

Peter nods, giving an awkward wave. “Right. See ya.”

Peter jumps out onto the fire escape. Quietly this time. Out of sight.

“See ya.” You said quietly to yourself.

The next morning, you woke up to a series of messages from Peter.

“she didnt suspect a thing HAHAHA” 12:32 AM

“thank u again btw” 12:33 AM

“it hurts to blink.” 12:34 AM

“ok goodnight ill let you know how it lasts thru the night.” 12:34 AM

“hi it disappeared a little bit but im gonna add some more i hope that’s ok” 9:12 AM

You bit your lip, your finger hovering over the facetime button. You click it without thinking too much of it, waiting for him to answer.

Peter comes into frame with a newly pale complexion. His entire face was covered in concealer.

“Hi.” He grins at the camera, oblivious to how ghostly he looked. This would’ve scared you if he didn’t answer the call in that ridiculous angle.

“Peter…” You sighed.

“What? Did I miss a spot?”

“…No. You can’t possibly miss any more spots I don’t think.”

Peter frowns at the camera, he thought he did well.

“Too much?” He chuckled, embarrassed.

You roll your eyes.

“This stuff covers everything. I don’t have freckles anymore.” He runs away at his cheek, showing that it wasn’t coming off.

“Did May see you yet today?” You sighed.

“No.. Should I take this off?”

Before you could answer, May quickly knocks on Peter’s door, and doesn’t wait to open the door.

“Hey, I’m thinking pizza for lunch-“

Peter turns to look at May and you could see her blurry face peek through behind Peter's shoulder on your screen. She widens her eyes and blinks a couple times.

“What… What is that?”

“Sunscreen.” Peter blurts out.

“Y/N and I are going to the beach.”

May knits her brows together, thinking if that’s really believable or not.

“There’s no beach near by.”

Peter silently stares at his aunt.

“...I’m eating this pizza with or without you .” May shrugs. “Have fun at the… beach.” She gives Peter a look and then closes the door.

Peter turns his attention back to his phone.

“The beach?” You squeaked out, attempting to stifle your laugh.

“I would hang up if I didn’t need help taking this off.” Peter says flatly.

You let out a groan. “Just get over here.”

#pearlfeline #peter parker #spiderman #peter parker x reader #peter parker imagine #mcu!peter parker x reader #mcu peter parker #mcu!peter parker #peter parker x fem!reader #marvel mcu #mcu imagine #mcu #peter parker fluff #peter parker x you #tom holland x reader #tom holland x you

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kel-lance · 4 months

Text

JJK Mafia Au (JJK x Reader) PART 3

Warnings:

- TW: Dead dove dont read (DDDR) Minors do not interact (MDNI): SA, Physical Assault, DubCon, NonCon, Mindbreak, Public Humiliation, Breeding, Ownership, Gaslighting, Multiple manipulation, RWORD, PTSD, a lot more toxic sh.

Premise:

Reader lives in a city where the two biggest gangs keep things line until the third gang showed up. That had nothing to do with you though, until dumb luck just happened to favor you one day. Basically You’re picked up and used by every dangerous criminal within the clans due to some alliances they had to create due to some members messing up the previous alliances. ((Almost everyone’s gonna have a turn 🤗)) ( i have 12 chapters planned out right now meaning after i write those ill still be writing more.)

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AN: Sorry for the long update im trying not to get evicted bc i was fired a while ago bc of a protest (surprise surprise big companies dont like or care about palestine or other places like it.) but i had to give away my cats and am still struggling i have my socials in my masterpost if you could help if not its okay ily

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You weren’t even conscious when you realized that you were still full of him. “Now he just thinks he can do as he pleases, oh my god, what a prick.” You were about to tell him off until he put his hand on your back. Stirring awake, Sukuna can feel as you tighten yourself around him. You realize you’re being stretched while laying upright on his chest.

You don’t think opening your eyes right now would be a good idea. Mostly because you could hear other people nearby? Sukuna laughs as he feels your realization. You could only pray that this phone call ends soon, and glad no one could see how red you thought you were, as your skin was glowing hot.

The base of your spine and neck were sore, like the rest of your body. Your back started to hurt, you needed more support. Sukuna caught this and moves you off of him, making a fwopping noise, and putting you back onto him with your back to him, like you wanted. But now you were facing his table, and he wasn’t on a phone call, you two were in a meeting. He was sat at the head, and quickly you catch a few pairs of eyes on you, your left hand grabs onto him and your right hides, your face.

“No way no way no way no way, oh my god,” You shook as Sukuna pushes himself into you. It was a lot, you could only throw your head down and cringe your face as this angle put pressure on another part of your sore body.

You stifle your yelps, trying not to look at anyone sitting in front of you. No one else is trying to look, most were red and blushing while the rest tried to ignore it. You didn’t need to be saved in this situation, but this was a worse way to wake up than not waking up at all. Your squirming had the leader release into you like it was nothing, his body and breathing stayed the same as he twitched violently inside of you. “He’s got to have done this before.” —————————————————————

“I couldn’t just leave you in that room. I needed all my men this morning, it was important.” Sukuna was talking out loud as he carried you to the infirmary. Now that everyone was free to go back to their posts, he wanted to bring you back to the twins to be able to go back to work.

“So I’m left to guess, you’re really just a random citizen that I met in an alley way?” He asks as he approaches the doors. He looks down at your pouting self, embarrassed to hell and back about what he just did to you infront of 20+ people.

Taking that as a yes, he heads in and instructs the girls to take care of you again. There are still no words spoken between you 3, not even the twins talked to each other, they can just telepathically communicate, adding to the creepiness they were embodying. You almost wanted to close your eyes and let them do what they needed to but this wasn’t a spa, and they weren’t happy with where they were currently. All you knew was that Sukuna was holding someone important to them hostage, and they were good nurses too so it seemed to be in Sukuna’s favor to have them all. After they finished, they gave you a few napkins w different pills on them, about 2-3 pills on each napkin. They finally spoke, explaining that each one would be for the next day in the morning and at night. You needed to rest and they would be busy, yet back to care for you randomly as they’re needed for the upcoming missions.

After they leave, you’re left to just lay there and thing about last night. Was it really worth it? You acted out due to desperation, in your head you didn’t feel bad because he did it to you first, and worse things after that. You just wanted some relief and god you got more than 7 times worth last night. You added 2 more this morning as Sukuna fucked you in front of his people.

You were briefly given time to think before the door opened suddenly, and a new man came in. It was one of your guards from the first few nights, you think he might be the one who fell asleep outside your door last night. You were still sat upright from what Nanako showed you to be the morning and nightly pills you were supposed to take.

The strange man comes up to you with urgent speed, his hand finds itself around your face as he pushes you into the wall, your head pounding from the collision. “Why would you do that? Why did you do that? What the fuck is wrong with you?” His voice was high in dismay, eyes wild and pink hair like Sukuna’s. Speaking of which he looked so similar to him, the man in front of you had a kinder face, his eyes glowed red but his features were younger, softer.

His fingers squeezed your face together like he was trying to ball it up. You could only raise your hands enough to try and push him away but your aching body was barely letting you move. His grasp spoke volumes, you just wished you knew what you did. Was he mad because you broke out? He didn’t look hurt or punished in anyway, so what was his problem?

“You fucking idiot.” He spat out, letting go of your face, he sits at the end of your bed with his head in his hands. Youre left to check on the bruises his fingers left on the sides of your face, not scared but apart of this new man who barged in, not knowing if Sukuna knew if he was with you currently.

“What did I do?”

“WHAT DO YOU THINK?!” The younger man was so upset you’d even ask. “Another few days and you would’ve been set free, I talked to him and we made a bet,” What was he taking about? “If you aren’t part of the other two gangs, that we’d let you go and he’d never bother you again, but if you were part of them, and especially if you broke out to do something stupid, we’d send your head back as a message.”

He throws his head back up to look at you. “I already know you’re not part of this, but why the fuck did you do that last night?”

He could be anybody, it didn’t matter if they looked similar. You weren’t about to make more trouble so you decided you weren’t going to tell him anything. You could only trust the people he assigned to you. “Listen dude, I don’t know what the fuck you’re talking about-“

“Of course you don’t!” He slammed his fist into the bed. “You could at least play along to get out of this! Ughhhh.” He groans further into his hands. “At this rate everything could go to shit.” He grabs your hands from your face and holds them in his, looking you square in the face. He stares at you for a second, examining your expression and the bruises his older brother inflicted on you. “What you did could have trapped you here forever, but you deserve a life of freedom, especially since you were dragged in this by accident.” He squeezed your hands tightly. “But seeing how you acted last night… Seriously do u want to die?”

You were pissed, how was it your fault? Why did you have to explain yourself in this situation? “He started it.” You huffed. The man’s hands let you go, reeled back, and backhanded you across the face, having you hit the wall behind you. “This isn’t a game. I’m gonna have to set you free myself.” He rips the blanket off from you and climbs on top. His large body has you immobile, and he wasted no time. He pulled apart your robes, flipped you around, and spat in-between your legs, taking his already hard on and smearing the spit around with his head before stuffing himself in, not caring if he covered himself fully or not.

The sudden entered had you scream into the pillow, writhing as the dry skin hooked at you from the inside. What was going on, is this allowed? You had so many questions. Living through another rape was nothing, living through another beating, just to still end up alive, you couldn’t be worried, you were more bothered that everyone was just doing what they wanted to you. Much to your surprise, this man who invaded your body, he stopped moving once he was fully in you, and he started to whimper.

The noises he was making weren’t something that should be coming out of a violent gang member, you would’ve never thought you’d witness something like that, much less actually feeling him start to slowly sob as he lets himself go, coating your walls inside, pressing himself deeper in, his dick twitching consecutively as his chest caved in and his voice wavered, trying to break out of the choke in his throat.

You were more confused than anything. Being used as an object, okay whatever, but why is he crying?? You hated people like that, it’s not up to them in this situation to feel that way, but whatever, he was done right? What was his deal? Now you were going to need another shower.

Sighing and shuttering, you were still regaining yourself from hitting the wall and the injuries his hands inflicted just minutes before, the shock of it all just put fear on the back burner. No, you couldn’t be scared of men, you were only angry.

“I- I’m sorry.” He managed. “I’m so sorry.” It wasn’t like he had realized what he did was wrongs but that he had to do that. “My brother, he doesn’t like to share, rather, he hates me so if I touch anything of his-“

Once again the door swings open. The man still inside of you is frozen, and youre still facedown into the bed, but you can only guess who it was. “You’re wrong, Yuuji.”

Yuuji slides out of and covers himself while sitting beside you. Raising your head, you watch to see how this new situation was going to play out. You only got that this brat was throwing a tantrum over his older relative, and he was trying to act equally as cruel, but the truth was surprising.

“You really thought they wanted to leave? I told you about them, and you asked yourself to guard them bc you believed they wouldn’t try anything…” He walks in further to taunt his sibling.

All you could do was watch. Yuuji, being the big guy he was, looked like he shrank in size as his brothers footsteps led him closer to your bed. Sukuna had reeled his fist back and sent Yuuji flying back, knocking into the next bed around.

“You see Yuuji, I was starting to like this one, but you’re right, sharing isn’t really my thing.” He walks closer to you now, his aura would be enough to choke anyone up, and his eyes glowed, not like anything you’ve seen before. “That’s why I’m going to surprise you all today. I’ll share. I’ll be as generous a guy as you couldn’t believe… COME IN!”

His words were instructed as a group of people walked in the door. It was a few men, and one woman. Only two paid Yuuji’s back hand some mind while the rest stood at the end of your bed. Sukuna’s at your side now, trying to figure out how to be gentle and play with your hair, but only managed to pick it up and toss it out of your face.

Someone from the group groaned, he was a taller man but around the same age as Yuuji. He was huge, buff and with a wild ponytail, to be honest he looked as equally scary as Yuuji and Sukuna combine if that made sense. Sukuna points him out, “Ever since Todo brought you to our attention, Yuuji just couldn’t help himself. He actually wanted you first.” He looked back at his glaring relative, “And I would have let him have it too if you didn’t break into my room last night.” He pulls you to him, his eyes eating up the sight of you before the feast. “Was it worth it Yuuji?”

Yuuji tries to get up and lunge at Sukuna but Todo and someone else hold him back. “Keep holding him, I’m gonna show him how badly he failed.” The large man picks you up, flip you around and splay you legs out, exposing you to the rest of the room. You can’t fight much, letting them see Yuuji’s remnants leak out of you.

“Yuuji, we’re not gonna stop until you finish, too.” That’s when you really looked up, there were six other people in the room with you, and what sucked was that you knew he was serious. “You might even be the dad, that’s the only way how I’ll let you have her.” Though you were in his arms just hours before, even had spent the night with him, yet now you’re squirming away. He grabs your bruised cheeks and shows you the line.

“Who wants to go first?” What do you even think in this situation? Were you scared? Were you ready? Were you angry? Would you adapt? Or would you freeze? It all didn’t matter, you didn’t get any time to think about how you were feeling for even a minute after they started.

A man with messy dark hair stepped forward. His dead eyes and face tattoo made him look so pretty, along with all the jewelry, brought out by his cool yet mean look. “Choso! Not a surprise; Hurrying to not hurt Yuuji?”

“I have shit to do.” He growled back to Sukuna. Coming forward he takes you away from the older man, pushing him adjacent the crowd. Driving right in, he kisses you roughly and climbs on top of you. His hands find their way up your torso, pulling your body closer to his, you’re basically a toy to him.

Because it was so sudden, you couldn’t really respond quick enough to hold him off. At this point there was really no fighting it. You sure did try, and you could but you thought with this group, they’d just get off on it. Knowing Sukuna, just meeting his brother, and now their other “brothers” are just here to try you out, especially remembering that they’re the new gang that pushed the Kamos out.

The large man has pushed you back into the bed, putting his weight on your legs as he completely buries you. Remembering that you’re fully naked now, your body goes into flight mode, all you can try to do is flail or move your face away but Choso has more control of your body than you did.

“Choso, you’re doing it wrong.” The woman chimes in. Walking over to critique his abrasive actions, the blonde comes from across the room to the side of the bed next to you two.

Choso parts his face from yours to groan into your chest. “We gotta hurry up…”

“I get that, but this is a break! And a great one at that,” she turns around and gives Sukuna a thumbs up.

“What the fuck? Why is she in on this?” The blonde lady was scaring you more than the men, it was like she was having fun just being invited.

“Here Choso, like this.” She nudges him off of you, and picks you up by the arms to sit you on her lap. Her muscles bulged, she made it look so easy picking you up like that. Your legs wrapped around her waist, as there was no other way to position yourself comfortably. She places her hand on your back as she brings you closer. “Good girl.”

You could only blush as her other hand found its way across your hip, caressing you up and down that sends a shiver down your spine. She kisses at your beck and teases your ear lobe so much your hips start to move on their own. She catches you with her fingers, plunging two deeply in you. “See? She’ll come right to you if you do it right.”

She has you sitting back pressed up against her, her changing movements kept you excited from her unpredictability. Digging her fingers deeper, she twirls them around to spread around Yuuji’s kids within you, not letting anything spill out. The only reaction you were strong enough to let go was just uncontrollable moaning. She has you in such a mess that you could only be vocal.

She takes out her fingers and uses the wet to flick at your clit, holding you down with each jolt and spasm the lady got out of you. “Kamo Jr.~ come ‘ere.” She calls to someone across the room.

“Stop fucking calling me that.” Finally, the last man you hadn’t observed yet started to make his way towards you, his hair was cut short and neat, but his face was stone cold. That comment riled him up enough to have him start unbuckling his pants.

“You act like you hate it~.” The woman caresses your body, making a display for the upcoming man. “I got her all ready for ya, so give us a show..”

You lol your head up and hold onto her forearm for support, looking up at ‘Kamo Jr.’ who was standing between your legs. This was the closet you’ve come to regain control in this situation, just being conscious enough to know who was next, you could only hope your mind erases and forgets it all.

“C’mon Kamo, you need to let your anger out…” She spreads your lips apart while her other hand moves your head enough to expose your neck. “And Sukuna’s given us a treat.”

Kamo stood there silently, upset wasn’t even the word for it. It looked like he was holding himself back for a while, considering that they broke up his family with recent discoveries. He was the promised heir, that idea was now thrown out the window the second sukuna killed his father.

He just learned that Choso was alive too, another rogue from the family who was stronger, smarter, older, etc. His future fell apart in seconds, and he hadn’t a moment to take it all in as they started bossing him around as one of the heirs of the top three gangs in the area. He just couldn’t catch a break really.

When he got to the bed, he gripped your thigh so hard he moved your entire body towards him in one movement. Your thoughts of his fingertips leaving bruises was quickly dropped to your stomach as he pressed himself onto you.

“Jesus fuck, what’s in their DNA why are all these dudes so hung?” Your poor mind and pussy, you really couldn’t continue this session if you wanted to keep the last peace of mind you had. You couldn’t lie though, the blonde lady’s tactics really did help to relax you, but knowing she’s just there to help them get off makes you still anxious about her.

This new guy though, as cold as Choso, was quick about it. He pulled himself out of his pants, only exposing what he needed as to say “Let’s get this over with.” Finally peering down at you, his eyes were almost dead until the lady brought up his anger. His remaining family was taken hostage and was released when Kamo offered to help Sukuna in exchange for their lives.

This was probably the last thing he could have wanted. Given his situation, with no other options, literally commanded to do something morally and ethically wrong, there was just so much going on in Kamo's head while he roughly repositioned you. To be honest it didn't seem like he was paying much attention until he realized he had pushed himself inside.

His mind was engulfed by only things he couldn't control, to now groaning due to the sudden change of overstimulation. Obviously you couldn't do much, but being on your back, spread out and being quickly devoured by the crowd invited, you had just a moment, a quick second to regain your senses and be in control. The last thing you remembered was Kamo starting to pick up speed, making your whole body involuntarily start to shake from each stroke, while the blonde woman brought her lips to yours and told you to eat.

The sequence of events went like this, Kamo fucked the shit out of you, basically blacked out when it started to really take off. As you struggled to stay focused on helping Yuki, Choso came to join, while all you could offer him was a hand, he pushed Yuki out of your face and shoved himself down your throat.

As Choso roughly played with you as he facefucked you, tugging your hair back and slapping your cheeks to feel the vibrations inside, Yuki snaked her way down to help pleasure/torture you more as Kamo was getting all his allowed frustration out. If you could get a glance at Sukuna, he would be smiling proud, you didn't know if it was because he was proud of his family, maybe even you for being good enough to satiate them, or maybe it was even just the thought of being in control once again.

If you got a glance at Yuuji, he would be looking away or have some weird look on his face. Was it pity? Was it sorrow? Regret? What was with this guy? "He called dibs." What is that supposed to mean, there's literally no common factor between us, so why would he really be feeling this way?

Choso started to bruise you throat, Kamo and Choso both ramming into you from opposite ends, basically using you for their anger, it was honestly becoming the best fuck of your life. It almost couldn't matter anymore, you were already getting fucked crazy with another man's cum lubricating the next man's round. Seriously if they didn't get you pregnant by now, the next set of people surely would.

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merymoonbeam · 8 months

Text

Light and Dark

Cc3 spoilers. You have been warned. 🫡

My obsession with this connection started when I saw @silverlinedeyes post about the six-pointed star in hosab and I added how I thought it resembled the TT scene elriel has.

We have the six pointed star in hosab and ithan-Hypaxia explained it like this.

Ithan angled his head. “A six-pointed star,” he said. Like the one Bryce had made between the Gates this spring, with the seventh candle at its center. “It’s a symbol of balance,” she explained, moving away a foot, but keeping the dagger at her side. Her crown of cloudberries seemed to glow with an inner light. “Two intersecting triangles. Male and female, dark and light, above and below … and the power that lies in the place where they meet.”

And we have the Elriel TT scene.

Elain looked up at Azriel, their eyes meeting, his hand still lingering on the hilt of the blade. I saw the painting in my mind: the lovely fawn, blooming spring vibrant behind her. Standing before Death, shadows and terrors lurking over his shoulder. Light and dark, the space between their bodies a blend of the two. The only bridge of connection … that knife.

So as you can see by the same color highlighted parts. It matches quiet well. But we are gonna focus on the green highlighted part now.

As you can see ithan thinks that it resembled a six-pointed star when bryce made the drop with the Heart Gate.

Hypaxia said, “Look at the Gates.” The quartz Gates across the city began to glow. Red, then orange, then gold, then white. Firstlight erupted from them. Lines of it speared out in every direction. The lights flowed down the ley lines between the Gates, connecting them along the main avenues. It formed a perfect, six-pointed star. The lines of light began to spread. Curving around the city walls. Cutting off the demons now aiming for the lands beyond. Light met light met light met light. Until the city was ringed with it. Until every street was glowing. And Bryce was still making the Drop. It was joy and life and death and pain and song and silence.

The important part is here that it was the Heart Gate. The center of the crescent city. Map:

One of seven in this city, all carved from enormous blocks of quartz hewn from the Laconian Mountains to the north, the Old Square Gate was often called the Heart Gate, thanks to its location in the dead center of Lunathion, with the other six Gates located equidistant from it, each one opening onto a road out of the walled city.

So it is the...heart. you know what is described as heart in acotar? RAMIEL.

Ramiel. The sacred mountain. The heart of not only Illyria, but the entirety of the Night Court.

A little elain quote:

“When I sleep,” she murmured, “I can hear your heart beating through the stone.” She angled her head, as if the city view held some answer. “Can you hear mine?”

And in my wild hunt post I theorized that Ramiel felt like the gates in a way. Because I think sarah took inspo from the Lia Fail stone from myths. It is one of the four treasures of Tuantha De Danaan. I went into more detail in my wild hunt post I link so Im not gonna add everything here again.

So Lia Fail.

The Lia Fáil was thought to be magical: when the rightful High King of Ireland put his feet on it, the stone was said to roar in joy. The stone is also credited with the power to rejuvenate the king and also to endow him with a long reign.

And we know that ramiel stone heals.

“Who healed you?” Nesta pulled back to survey them. “How are you even here?” “The stone,” Emerie explained, features soft with wonder. “It healed every wound on us the moment it brought us out of the Rite. We arrived here, of all places.”“I think it knew where we were needed most,” Gwyn said quietly, and Nesta smiled.

And we know that with firstlight you can heal. Does the ramiel stone consist firstlight and it works in a gate like way? It literally teleported them? How can it do that?

In hosab we have this:

“Your power came from the Gate—with a shit-ton of firstlight mixed in. So your magic—beyond the light, I mean— needs to be powered up. It relies on firstlight, or any other form of energy it can get. You’re literally a Gate: you can take in power and offer it. But it seems the similarity ends there. The Gates can store power indefinitely, while yours clearly peters out after a while.”

So a gate can take power and offer it and it can store indefinitely. If we take the ramiel as a first light storage of daglan with the ramiel stone it is working like a gate would?? Because in hofas the daglan under prison said they hid many things...under mountains as well.

Vesperus backed up a half step, hissing at the gleaming weapon. “We hid pockets of our power throughout the lands, in case the vermin should cause … problems. It seems our wisdom did not fail us.” “There are no such places,” Azriel countered coldly. “Are there not?” Vesperus grinned broadly, showing all of her too-white teeth. “Have you looked beneath every sacred mountain? At their very roots? The magic draws all sorts of creatures. I can sense them even now, slithering about, gnawing on the magic. My magic. They’re as much vermin as the rest of you.”

We have another light and dark scene with important sword and dagger. The dagger that was in the elriel scene—TT and Gwydion.

They are white and dark light—Alpha and Omega.(I have a post about this)

The male drew it, and Bryce flinched.

Flinched, but—“What the fuck?” The knife could have been the twin of the Starsword: black hilted and bladed. It was its twin. The Starsword began to hum within its sheath, glittering white light leaking from where leather met the dark hilt. The dagger— The male dropped the dagger to the plush carpet. All of them retreated as it flared with dark light, as if in answer. Alpha and Omega. “Gwydion,” the dark-haired female whispered, indicating the Starsword.

And whats important is that with her power bryce can unite them to open a portal to nowhere.

Polaris’s eyes widened as Bryce plunged the blades into her chest. And as those blades thrust through skin and bone, the star in Bryce’s own chest flared out to meet them. It collided with the blades, and both sword and knife blazed bright, as if white-hot. The light extended up through Bryce’s hands, her arms, her body, turning her incandescent— Into a star. A sun.

What's important is that as bryce collects Theia's power that was parted into three parts she starts to realize it is taking a touch of darkness...

Bryce rolled her eyes, but for a heartbeat, Hunt wondered if Thanatos was right: Bryce had explained how the prism in the Autumn King’s office had revealed her light to now be laced with darkness, as if it had become the fading light of day, of twilight—

And we go to that scene...

With a prayer to Cthona, she sent twin beams of light arcing around the prisms, shooting straight into them.Twin bursts of that light flared from either prism, gunning for each other. Bands of light falling into darkness, her power stripped to its most elemental, basic form. They shot for each other, and where they met, light and darkness and darkness and light slamming into each other—Bryce stepped into the explosion in the heart of it. Stepped into her power.It lit her up from the inside, lit up her very blood. Her hair drifted above her head, pens and papers and other office detritus flowing upward with it. Such light and darkness—the power lay in the meeting of the two of them. She understood it now, how the darkness shaped the light.

And the purple highlighted part...it is exactly the same as the six pointed star.

And if we go by the elriel scene...

Can you see the connection?

Also that elemental part in bryce's scene. we learn about that in acosf.

Cassian forced himself to sit perfectly still as Rhys dragged a hand through his black hair. “Once, the High Fae were more elemental, more given to reading the stars and crafting masterpieces of art and jewelry and weaponry. Their gifts were rawer, more connected to nature, and they could imbue objects with that power.”

And we know how theia and her line can use the TT and Starsword bc she helped them make them.

Theia extended her hands toward the water, the offered blades. And on phantom wings, sword and dagger soared for her. Summoned to her hands.Starlight flared from Theia as she snatched the sword and knife out of the air, the blades glowing with their own starlight. My mother returned that day with only Pelias and my father’s blades. As she had helped Make them, they answered to the call in her blood. To her very power.

So maybe Azriel and Elain have some kind of elemental magic as well?

Also the stone on top of ramiel...sings.

But when he’d touched the onyx monolith, when he’d felt that ancient force sing into his blood in the heartbeat before it had whisked him back to the safety of Devlon’s camp … It had been worth it. To feel that. With a solemn bow of his head toward Ramiel and the living stone atop it, Cassian caught another swift wind and soared southward.(acofas)

TT and Gwydion also sing.

“Let’s go,” Azriel said, and released her hand. Because the sword and dagger weren’t merely tugging now. They were singing, and all she had to do was reach out for them—

What's more interesting is @icedflames made a post about Fragarach and about the connection between gwydion and tt which came true in cc2 as we learned they were connected.

You have to stand on top of Lia Fail stone with Fragarach.

In Irish mythology, Fragarach (or Freagarthach), known as "The Whisperer", "The Answerer", or "The Retaliator", was the sword of Nuada, the first high king. The sword was forged by the gods and was meant to be wielded only by those who posed above the stone of destiny (the Lia Fail) which roared and the sword whispered in response.

So do we need to take Gwydion and TT to Ramiel? To that Stone? We need Elriel to do it bc all of them are "light and dark"? What will happen if they are all there?

Also dont forget about book of breathings prophecy.

Life and death and rebirth

Sun and moon and dark

Rot and bloom and bones

Hello, sweet thing. Hello, lady of night, princess of decay. Hello, fanged beast and trembling fawn. Love me, touch me, sing me.

Also Fionn dipped the Gwydion to Cauldron.

Another shift of memory, and Fionn pulled a long blade from the Cauldron, dripping water. A black blade, whose dark metal absorbed any trace of light around it. Bryce’s knees weakened. The Starsword. Two other figures stood there, veiled in the thick snow, but Bryce hardly got a chance to wonder about them before Silene’s narration began anew.

And Cauldron sits upon Ramiel.

“The Cauldron,” Nesta said hours later, pointing to yet another carving on the wall. It indeed showed a giant cauldron, perched atop what seemed to be a barren mountain peak with three stars above it. Azriel halted, angling his head. “That’s Ramiel.” At Bryce’s questioning look, he explained, “A mountain sacred to the Illyrians.”

So we are going to ramiel with gwydion and tt? 🫡

#elriel #ramiel #gwydion and truth teller #light and dark #cc3 spoilers #I will add more to this if I find anything more usefull but as of now my brain is done and I cant add more to it #hofas

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myconidwitch · 8 months

Text

EVERYONE, PLEASE HELP ME CONSTRUCT THE NOELLE RAIL LINE OVER HERE:

i need it so that i have safer ways of transporting my soup, and can also transport myself outside of my region (which, for those of you who don't know, has a spell on it which forbids anybody outside of it to know important things about it like location and stuff, which is a problem because normally the only way to get in is teleportation, but i can't do that if i don't know where the destination of the teleportation is located)

myconid witch wizardblr lore:

noelle merianda was the name of a human girl in a town called fand'quer. she had a father whom she loved deeply. one day, her father fell extremely ill. upon finding out about this, noelle immediately tried to find a way to cure him of his illness. she tried medication after medication, but nothing worked. she became so desperate, that she started learning witchcraft, specifically magic soup, in order to heal him. she eventually found a recipe that would work, and attempted to make it. before noelle could finish this stew, her mother found out about it, and was not very pleased. noelle's town has a bit of a history with witches, and upon finding out her daughter was practicing witchcraft, her mother threw noelle out of the house, against the father's wishes. the only thing she was allowed to bring with her was the large pot she used to attempt to make the soup. noelle had to run into the bog near her village, unless she wanted to be executed for witchcraft. she found the tower of a long dead wizard, where she sought refuge. noelle began studying wizardry in that tower, so that she could protect herself against whoever was inside that bog. after spending about 10 years in that tower, eldritch fungi began enveloping her body, slowly replacing it with eldritch flesh. noelle made a decision to never practice witchcraft ever again, due to it being the reason she lost everything. after about 2 more years, she became a full fledged myconid due to all the eldritch fungi, which gave her the ability to talk with sentient mushrooms. noelle started making friends with a lot of sentient mushrooms by keeping them company and making food for them, while the sentient mushrooms in turn searched for ingredients for food. during one of their searches, noelle's favorite mushroom became sick, similar to her father, and she knew what needed to be done. she wiped the layers upon layers of dust off the old pot, and started making magic soup. she used every bit of knowledge she had about magic soup to be able to heal that mushroom. this time however, nothing got in the way, and she was able to heal them. after this, she began learning as much as she could about magic soup, having regained her love for it.

gonna keep adding other stuff onto this post as time goes on

at 150 followers i'll draw my mutuals, well at least the ones i've interacted with

↑ ok so to be more specific, since im absolutely NEVER going to get the drawing finished if i draw an actual character (i'd get demotivated before even starting lol) im gonna just have to draw something that symbolises the mutuals.

oh also the drawings will all be on one paper and be stacked on top of this absolute MONSTER of a pinned post

#wizardblr #lore

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walli3darl1ng · 1 year

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howdy there Neighbour!!

Can I request the Welcome home ppl reacting to a half cybertronian(transformers) half human reader?

Like!! The reader comes through into the welcome home by accident due to their travelling device not functioning properly! I'd love to see their reactions!!@ but Frank also questioning what even is the reader species might be funni

Hello neighbor!! <3

Thank you for requesting! I’ll try my best. Also you’ll be so cool to them!

Also look at me go! Posting twice😭

It was a sunny afternoon with the welcome home neighborhood and they were having their weekly picnic just up the hill.

Everyone was playing and having fun when the sky got darker and the clouds got grayer, swirling around in the middle.

“What’s happening?” Julie asks in fear as she covers herself from the strong winds, clinging to Barnaby.

As they all hold onto each other they see what looks like a ball of light shoot from the center of the black hole and fall down a little deeper in the woods. This caught most of the crew’s attention and out of all Eddie was the first to take action and run over to where it landed.

“Eddie?!”

“Wait for us!”

“Hurry, guys!”

And off they went to see that fell from the sky! Was it aliens? Monsters?! No, it was you getting off your little pod.

You are gears and metal wires but you’re human shape? And your face is human enough. What could you be? And what are you doing here?

You groan and shake your head, lifting your robotic arm and clicking a button to show a hologram of a map. “No signal? That’s not possible.” You mumbled.

The soft neighborhood glance at each other before Barnaby stepped on a branch causing it to snap loudly. “Barnaby! You’re gonna scare them off!”

“Im sorry it was an accident!”

“Julie I think you’ll scare them away with that yelling.” Wally cuts in while holding two bush branches on either side of his head to keep him hidden. Very poorly but it’s the thought the counts.

“That’s mean, Wally! I’m telling Home!”

“Tell them. All I have to do is sing to them-“

“Uh, guys, this is not the time-“

“Hello?” Frank was Interrupted by your smooth voice and turns to see you’re now in front of them with a small, amusing smile.

Up close you do look human but looking at your arms and fingers they can tell it’s robotic. With ball joints and moving gears when you lift your hand to wave at them. “Hi..”

Julie, Barnaby and Sally were the first ones to inspect you from head to toe, vocalizing their interest of your unique appearance. As well as looking at your little home pod. “Oh! Careful, I don’t want you to get hurt!” You’ll say as you see them climbing on the pod then giggling when poppy scolds them and makes them get off.

Howdy is amazed when you transformed and added a new arm to help you take the pod off the ground. He’s not the only one with more then two arms! He doesn’t feel as lonely.

Eddie and Frank are both curious and fearful. It’s cool that you can do all this stuff and seeing their friends gush over you is adorable they just don’t knew what you are exactly. Are you human? Robot? Both? That now want to take as much information of you and your kind; speaking of, are there more of you? Do you have family?

Poppy is afraid the trio will break you! You look so durable yet so fragile? Like you’ll break easily. She thinks your nice since you’re keeping the trio occupied with a video of dancing fruits on a hologram screen.

Wally is just a curious and cautious kitty. His eyes are wide with wonder right now. Especially seeing the dancing fruits. He saw and apple and lost it.

Turns out you were on your way home but the portal was built incorrectly and sent you here. So all you have to do is take it down and built it again. But that would take months and you’ll need to charge up before putting your motherboard through that.

For the meantime,

Welcome home.

#welcome home #wally darling #welcome home wally #welcome home x reader #welcome home x you #welcome home poppy #welcome home frank #welcome home julie #welcome home howdy #welcome home sally #welcome home eddie #welcome home barnaby

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nr1chaedickrider · 1 year

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'I need you'

_______________________________________

"sana! don't-" you shout.

its raining. a cold night. usually you would cuddle with her.

usually.

you're drenched. the streets are empty, just a few lights on.

"please!" is what you yell after. she doesnt stop.

once in her life, she doesnt stop. sana keeps walking.

you dont want to end it like this. you didnt even talk about it.

"It's not you, its me." sana said.

"Its just not the right time" she added.

You think about giving up. Watching sana walk down that cold, empty, dark street.

Can you even stop her?

Is this even the right thing to do?

"Let me go." is what she said before leaving. She wasnt even crying.

She didnt even shed a tear.

Its like your legs move on your own, you start to run.

You dont even know what you're exactly doing but you know you just need to confront her.

You run after her, her figure getting more and more visible as you get closer. You grab her wrist, making her stop.

"Look at me" you said.

Sana turns around, looking at you.

"What do you want?" she asked. her face shows no emotion. its just wet from the rain. no tears.

"I-" you look into her eyes, searching for atleast for one little sign that she is not gonna leave you.

She tries to move, but you hold onto her. Afraid to let go.

"Sana please-"

"no, just.. leave me alone." she interrupts you.

"I love you, forever." you said. letting go of her and walking away.

Silent sobs are heard.

But they arent yours.

Sana watches you leave as her face gets even wetter. Its not because of the rain.

"I love you too" she whispers.

idk why i wrote this im feeling angsty again sorry sorry >< anyways im gonna post a chae fluff story soon to make it up to yall!!

#Spotify #wlw #feeling silly #twice imagines #twice x reader #twice smut #twice ff #sana imagines #sana x reader #sana angst

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blueskittlesart · 1 year

Note

hiiiiiiii so um. ik a while back you posted a doodle of yourself with short hair and i’ve been thinking about cutting mine short—do you have any tips about picking a style or anything that might not be obvious about having short hair?

oh fuck yes I do! I've had short-medium hair in a few different styles since I was thirteen (im 20 now, so it's been a while) and I recently buzzed my head for the second time so i'm pretty experienced in this area lol!

first thing you should know is that if anyone has ever suggested that you don't have the "facial structure" for short hair or that you're not gonna look good with it is full of shit. no one tells men they don't have the face for short hair. i promise it's gonna look good. chop that shit off

in terms of style, be aware of the amount of work the style you pick is going to take. when I first cut my hair short the reference photo I gave my stylist was of a heavily styled cut--something that would take gel and hairspray and a lot of effort to maintain every day. The base cut was fine, but it didn't look like my reference photo without a ton of effort on my part, and at 13 I wasn't really willing to put that kind of effort in, so my hair ended up unstyled and kind of flat and weird for a while. if you're someone that doesn't like to put a ton of work into styling their hair every day, pick a style you can just wake up and go with. my personal favorite lazy bitch haircut is the buzzcut that i currently have. insanely low maintenance and comes with the added benefit of stopping weird men from talking to you in public. perfect haircut.

Also be aware of how your cut is going to grow out and/or how often you're going to have to get it trimmed to keep it looking the same way. that was something i remember being really surprised about when i first cut my hair off--when your hair gets to a certain length, it grows more slowly and you don't have to cut it as regularly to maintain its health and your look. when you have shorter hair, your hair grows FAST, and if you're not planning on growing it out you're going to need much more regular trimming to keep it in check. Make sure that that's in your budget or that you have the time and skill to trim it back yourself! Alternatively, if you're planning on growing it out after the cut, look into how it's gonna grow out so you know what to expect in terms of look and styling. I like to buzz my head mid-summer and let it grow out for about a year before shaving it all off again, because I know that I like all the stages of growing out that cut and I know how to style all of them. there's always gonna be an awkward stage of growing out your hair, but make sure that you're not gonna spend a ton of time hating your look just to get your length back if that's your plan!

my final advice: if you're looking for a specifically masculine haircut as an afab person, do not go to the same older female stylist you've been going to since you were 10 years old. trust me. You can show that woman a picture of a whole grown man for reference and you will still be leaving with a karen cut. she is incapable of giving you what you want. Either try to find a stylist who you trust to use your reference faithfully, go to a male barber, or cut it yourself! especially if you're going for a simple buzzcut or something similar, it's really easy to cut your own hair at home with a pair of electric clippers from amazon. I've been cutting my hair with safety scissors and some clippers borrowed from a friend for going on 4 years now. it's easier than you think!! youtube tutorials are your best friend.

now onto things you might not know:

listen to me. this is the single most important piece of advice i can give you. buy spray-on sunscreen and SPRAY YOUR FUCKING HEAD. there is no hell like a peeling sunburn all over your fucking scalp. it will happen and you will not expect it and you will want to die. you are going to think your hair is thick enough that it won't happen and it is going to happen anyway. do not take chances with this shit

you do NOT need nearly as much shampoo and conditioner for a short cut as you are instinctively going to put in your hands after years of having long hair. think, proportionately, about the product-to-hair ratio you were using BEFORE your haircut, and do not squirt out more than like a nickel-sized pool of product at the absolute most. your bank account and your hair will thank you.

short hair still needs to be taken care of especially if you're bleaching/otherwise chemically treating it regularly! if you're putting harsh chemicals in your hair you should be using restorative treatments afterwards regardless of length. no matter how short your hair is it can still get stringy and gross and break!!

in that same vein, you CANNOT be applying bleach to your short hair in the same way you do for your long hair. listen to me. Drugstore bleach cannot be sitting directly on your scalp for more than 20 minutes. if your hair is short, any amount of bleach you put in it is going to end up sitting directly on your scalp. i know it's tedious to do multiple passes but chemical burns are even more tedious. please do not put bleach on your skin

also in regards to bleaching/color, keep in mind that your semipermanent color is probably going to have less longevity in your short hair than it did in your long hair. Since all your hair is close to your scalp now, it's taking the brunt of your shampoo regimen and therefore the dye is going to wash out quicker than it would in long hair where most of the dye is further away from the scalp. if you're regularly trimming your hair to keep it your desired length, you're also going to be cutting out a lot more color than you would by just trimming dead ends on long hair. you may find yourself spending more on hair dye if you dye your hair regularly!

#hope this helps <3 i am very much looking forward to the growing-out phases of this current buzzcut cycle i already miss my pigtails lowkey #but i do still love my short hair and i think everyone who wants short hair should go for it!! its so fun and freeing #asks

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mins-fins · 9 months

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☆ 1 killing my boss challenge!

❝ day 1289 of work, trying

my best not to quit.. ❞

⌗ NOTE 𓈒 𓈒 𓈒 welcome to chapter one ☺️!! now this definitely might be a little underwhelming for a first chapter but tbh im just so excited for this i love nct dream in a silly sitcom style fic (poor reader is suffering i am so sorry) but anyway love you all it is currently midnight so goodbye

⌗ WORD COUNT 𓈒 𓈒 𓈒 1.1k

⌗ MASTERLIST | NEXT

YOU SHOULDN'T GO TO WORK TODAY.

you really shouldn't, you don't want to. you can practically hear the sound of your managers piercing screams before you even step out of the house, and you swear it makes you shiver. you don't even have to look into the other room to know that renjun already left, these days, he usually gets up and leaves the house earlier than you do, but he never forgets to leave a note to tell you.

when you walk into the kitchen, the first thing you notice is a sticky note on the cabinet. you can immediately recognize renjun's handwriting, and you simply smile immediately upon seeing the note.

left early again.. sorry mark needed me for something :( see you later i love you!! — renjun♡

you let out the slightest giggle, rubbing your hands over your face before sighing. you place your hands onto the counter, and stare at the digital clock before you. you've never been late to work, even with how late you leave the house, and as you in stare at the time, going from 7:32 to 7:33 am, you almost consider staying home and being lazy.

you want to be lazy.

you want so badly to be lazy.

you do not want to go to work.

but who else is going to pay all your expenses if it isn't you?

so you roll your eyes and suck it up, grabbing your stuff and walking out of your shared dorm.

it's a saturday! a saturday and i'm fucking working!

you twirl your keys around your fingers and whistle a song to yourself. another day, another inclusion of grueling hours of yelling and trying to stop your coworkers from getting themselves fired added to your week. you wish you could stay home for a day, but without you, the workplace really doesn't function correctly.

and that's not just you saying that! mark has told you that on the several occasions where you got the seven of your crazy coworkers out of trouble.

and do you constantly risk your job to make sure that the idiots you work with do not lose their jobs? yes, but can you help it? no.

at this point, your surprised how you haven't lost your job with how many times you take the fall for your coworkers.

when you arrive at the store, you sigh, you almost consider turning around and walking all the way home, because you feel like if you step into the store and clock in you are genuinely going to punch the first customer that yells at you.

but, you have a job to do, and you have money to make.

you can practically hear the complaints from your mother as you step in. why do you even work there? you could find so many better jobs!

yeah well nobody else is hiring!

you'd rather stay here than take the risk of quitting and not being able to find a new job.

"you're late!" donghyuck yells at you as you walk through the door. he smirks as your face falls, you just walked in and you already wanna walk straight out, amazing!

"i'm ten minutes early" you state, gritting your teeth, he stares at you for a moment before rolling his eyes. "if anyone is gonna be late it's jaemin.." you mumble, immediately clocking in as you stand beside him.

donghyuck once again chuckles at you, a shit-eating grin coming to his face as he thinks about a stupid joke he told yesterday. "oh, by the way, yoon wanted me to give this to you".

you raise an eyebrow, confused, but donghyuck just gives you a post-it note with your boss' handwriting on it.

i'm out for an emergency today, so you are in charge, make sure to keep everything in check y/n - yoon jaeho.

you reread the thing at least four times before sighing and placing your head down onto the counter, already regretting coming into work. donghyuck looks over your shoulder to read the sticky note, and immediately bursts into a loud fit of laughter. "holy shit he left you in charge!?"

you want to scream and cry, seriously.

"well good luck y/n, break a leg!" donghyuck pats your back aggressively, hitting it more than patting it.

"don't hit me lee donghyuck".

the stern tone you give him makes him roll his eyes once again, and you flick him in the forehead before walking past him towards the staff room. when he walks through the door, he's met with a specific smiling individual.

"hi y/n!"

"good morning".

renjun gives a smile to you, mark waves, and jeno looks surprised that you even showed up. "i thought you would've stayed home.." he mutters.

you furrow your eyebrows. "why that?"

"you took like fifty exams yesterday" mark says with an exaggerated tone, you barely stifle your laugh, and end up letting out a displeasing sounding snicker. "i genuinely thought you would've overslept".

"oh believe me, i tried to oversleep, i failed".

at the words, jeno laughs, covering his mouth with his hand, renjun just sighs, shaking his head. you scan the room, then stop, because there are people missing.

"where are chenle and jisung?" you inquire, now those two aren't the most reliable people out of all eight of you, but they usually clock in not long after you, sometimes even before you, so them not being here despite the fact that they have to be is.. strange.

"oh, apparently they're coming with jaemin today" jeno responds.

you blink, as if trying to process the very words that jeno just told you. was he serious? "what?"

"yep" renjun nods, chewing obnoxiously loud as he ignores mark's continuous poking on his shoulder. "i don't know why either, i think they just got lazy".

you refrain yourself from absolutely going insane and shouting, because you were left in charge, so you have to keep your cool and stay calm. you sigh and punch the bridge of your nose. "okay yeah um, whatever i'll just talk to them when they get her—"

"y/n!"

you jump as donghyuck peaks into the room, smiling at everyone before deadpanning at you. "um we have an issue with a customer that somehow doesn't understand the layout of the place".

you blink. "what?"

"yeah apparently she needs a verbal instruction on how to navigate the place and your the only person that knows the place like the back of your hand, so..." donghyuck waves to jeno, then looks back to you with that signature empty state of his as he awaits your response.

"i— alright, yeah i'm coming" you slightly wave him off and look back to the three in the room. "be good" you command, pointing your finger at the three of them, as if accusingly.

"aye aye captain" mark replies, saluting to you. you chuckle before yelping as you get pulled out of the room by donghyuck.

"ow! hyuck my arm!"

oh you had a long day ahead of you.

#女˚ 1 2 3 !#nct dream #nct dream au #nct dream x reader #nct dream imagines #nct dream drabbles #nct dream scenarios #mark lee #huang renjun #lee jeno #lee donghyuck #na jaemin #zhong chenle #park jisung #nct dream x male reader #male reader #nct dream series #𑁍 ࣪˖ 𓂃 isa's works!

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swampgallows · 1 year

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i dont want to violate the privacy of the covid cautious groups im in but man sometimes i really wish i could cross post to force people to face the tragedy and suffering everyone else in the world is conveniently ignoring. one user today mentioned during work they “burst into deep sobbing and talked about the genocide of Disabled people... I’m tired of being told to respect other people’s opinions not to mask. I don’t respect it. You’re committing passive genocide.” i really do think people have forgotten that a “personal preference” to not mask or test or to attend gatherings and then refuse to isolate is another day added onto the genocide of vulnerable people. another day that it isnt safe to go outside, another day of shutting down our entire lives so that you can live on OUR time. “well if disabled people are gonna just stay inside forever then im gonna do what i want!! LOL!!!” you are the reason we are stuck inside. you are the person keeping us inside. we are staying inside because otherwise you will kill us. you are killing us. you are killing us. you are killing us.

why should i deserve to die? because i lost a genetic lottery and ended up with a blood disorder? because i have a mental illness and so i’m inherently flawed? because i’ve already “wasted” so much of my life trying to survive?

you are suppressing disabled and vulnerable voices. you are barring us from the public sphere. we are being barred from taking certain jobs and therefore from maintaining positions of power in society. we are being ignored on a social, familial, communal, and federal level. our government brags that “we have the tools” and then immediately defunds them, makes them inaccessible, renders them useless by promoting conditions in which the virus can further mutate and spread.

have you learned about xbb 1.16, arcturus? how the virus is evolving toward targeting the suppression of t-cells? have you talked to anyone with “long covid”, or new or preexisting pots, me/cfs, or other chronic fatigue or immune disorders? do you know that covid has proven over and over to do permanent organ damage to millions of people? and you are okay with this? if you flippantly go see someone, unmasked, while carrying covid and infect them, putting them at risk for lifelong disability, how can you live with yourself? when your previously abled friend now needs an inhaler, a litany of medications, a mobility aid, or has to shut down their entire life and live out of their bed, how can you go on knowing you and your apathy did that to them?

i lost the lottery before i was born, yet everyone who’s gone “back to normal” is choosing to play it every day. how much longer can you keep winning on someone else’s odds?

#covid #blathering

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linc-karo-27 · 8 months

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6.55 MSQ and a theory for Dawntrails and Beyond

Happy Patch day all! (as I write this) I saw the MSQ and it tells me we need another one of these posts. Spoilers under the cut.

Though before that - confirmation Jonathan is back and has been G'raha all cycle, he clearly is very rusty on that though (though his "real" accent has been a bit wobbly recently/soften back to pre bridgerton i noticed the other day), though many have been - and this is the main point of the post.

and no, I am still team "they will recast when they have to, the dubs dont affect the story", the French had a few "actor A/ Actor B" for characters - the English just was lucky we did not get any recast

Right: lets get on with it

So Square/CBU3 really did that did they? G'raha back in the patch for him to turn round at the end to allow Krile to come, he is staying back (WHICH I PREDICTED ON TWITTER FOR 7.0 BUT NOT LIKE THIS). Though it was clear when Wuk told us she wanted help, he didn't want to be a part of it. Also only twins outside of the Baldesion Trio shown. Wonder why?

But yeah. im open to chat about this with people.

This leads onto my theory Re: late 7.0 and beyond, this swap kinda confirms to me what 7.x is gonna be: Corvos, or at least the build up to that. To do that you'd have to remove G'raha from our party to allow him to off screen decide to do that (and both the Endwalker short story and then his reaction to Wuk's plans shows me he isn't keen on reliving the Empire's messing in his homeland or even the state of the world after the eighth.

My theory is late 7.0 or 7.1 G'raha linkpearls us to come talk to him "as something happened" and he tells us he's thinking of using the students resources to help sort out or help the left overs of the Empire. Thancred and/or Urianger comment on this as a "oh yeah it's a mess right?" (See back to 6.1) and then it's set up that we see the plot of everyone talking to leaders/making plans in the patches OR we get to 8.0 for us to go. Basically he's coming back in 7.x to set that up, and likely in Dawntrails plays the Tataru job of contacting us now and then.

The reason this all feels weird is simple: Square/CBU3 are shite at working out how we are dealing with adding new people + scion rotation + keeping it not feel rushed. Saw it with Zero, she clearly is popping up again in 8.0 or something - but to introduce her and spend the whole patch cycle with her to dump her felt cruel. I HOPE 7.0 fixes this and explains more about how going forward they do this, its just the "too many characters" hasn't happened yet because we haven't had a real story end until 6.0 (and they blue balled the scions leaving in 6.1)

Also the dub had no effect on it/this isn't to introduce a recast. This is my copium leave be on that 🤣 I'll still have my Krile and Erenville though so I'll be happy still with DT don't worry.

#ffxiv #ffxiv patch 6.55 #ffxiv spoilers #patch 6.55 spoilers #dawntrail spoilers #ffxiv dawntrail #but yeah #this is story driven and not square using it to cover a va missing #because side will just remove Jonny without any build up because its still the dub #though copium said this predates everything and was planned to allow us to have Krile

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trickstarbrave · 1 year

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Asfkghjkl please please give the deets on Baldur (only if you wanna)

uhmmm sure i can hopefully it will be what u want

>uses he/him pronouns and mostly masculine terms so i guess i'd put him closer to the boy side of nb?? gender is hard i think if you asked him he'd say "i'm a guy??? i think??? i guess???? something like that. definitely not a woman"

>uses primarily one handed weapons. knows a bit of archery and also good with a shield. id apologize for giving so many of my skyrim ocs archery if archery wasnt such a useful fucking skill

>for his bg i didn't actually think it thru LMAO he is just on the streets most of his childhood so he learned to steal. this gets ppl to treat him like shit from an early age bc no one wants a scrappy thief running around your home or business potentially stealing from you

>very good looking. other characters are transphobic abt his appearance now but fuck them i love my pretty boys and will make pretty boy ocs until i die probably.

>has faced a lot of SA both pre and post transition and is pretty traumatized and thats mentioned a lot in the story early on esp disassociation from trauma so it might be triggering. i self projected a Little too hard. he learns to fight to defend himself and refuses to die

>obv not every single character was a horrible transphobe but baldur also like to keep to himself due to being burned before and theres also a lot of casual transphobia. he's a smaller guy rather than the typical buff nord warrior (a significant portion of that comes from malnutrition growing up though)

>he makes it all the way to sovngarde actually despite how frankly ill prepared he was

>like i need to stress even with the "blades" backing him and him doing active recruitment for them and getting them to higher numbers than the game allows (for more realism) he isn't taken seriously by most people and was super unprepared. they sent him to get the dragon stone and fight the dragon at the tower bc they were kinda just hoping he'd die. even the blades didn't rly take him seriously except for delphine and esbern and delphine wasn't happy this was their 'hero'. he was kinda scrawny due to not eating properly and not trained well enough. despite this he was a pretty terrifying warrior

>alduin acknowledges this and thinks if he treats THIS dragonborn like a dragon he shouldnt get a miraak situation this time. he gave miraak too much freedom as a priest as far as he is concerned. keep the dragonborn on a tight leash with proper discipline and rewards and he'll hopefully have a good champion on his hands instead.

>i made up some shit for this fic exclusively that is probably not lore friendly. which is dragon's CAN just make oaths they take seriously, but also alduin knows how to etch that oath onto their souls and claim them as his own. breaking the oath can have some dire consequences, but as a benefit you can get stronger and also be brought back from the dead by alduin because alduin is eternal and can't ever really die without seriously destroying time as we know it. normally its uncomfortable and dragons just put up with it but uhhhh baldur likes it a little Too Much

>did i mention this fic gets pretty bdsm? it kinda does. we have soul branding, soul sex i guess???, possessiveness, claiming, probably more im forgetting. alduin learns the joys of a very submissive and compliant sub i guess

>also added is like i said in another ask dragons in this au do just have sex. theyre pretty cautious, prideful creatures though. so usually there is some light combat/wrestling/debating over who is gonna bottom and 'submit'. dragons love dominating after all and who am i to take that from them. they'll do it to blow off steam reinforce hierarchy, for rewards, and also just for fun. dragons don't really need to reproduce and can choose if they get pregnant or not so it serves other functions socially for the most part

>in fact finding two dragons that ACTUALLY reproduce is weirder. they can in this fic but for the most part they don't. having kids with someone requires a level of trust and devotion that dragons seldom like to give up, but it does happen from time to time. those that do are usually mates for life and are pretty exclusive with one another. creation via reproduction is seen as inferior to just shaping the world however you want to (and THAT part is actually lore compliant with tes

>oh yeah and dragons are fucky with gender. they're literally dragons. demi gods to full on gods and cosmic forces of the natural world. what matters is if you're a drake or a jill (god i hate that term but its what we got) and that also informs your duties to time itself. theres drakes that lay eggs and jills with penises. also why dragons vary so much in appearance, they just pick how they wanna look. they don't give a shit. baldur having a vagina absolutely does not phase alduin, nor does his transition--its only right he change his body just as he changes the natural world with his thu'um, its his birthright by akatosh

>i know a lot of the above isnt abt baldur specifically but i hope it can inform you a lot on how his relationship with alduin goes and why it goes that way

>alduin names baldur his champion and doesn't hesitate to start taking care of him. he isn't aware mortals down in skyrim weren't treating him the best yet. he thought they should have been given he is their champion sent by the divines to defeat him according to prophecy yadda yadda so why wouldn't they treat him like a king and outfit him with the best gear they had at their disposal? but baldur well fed, well trained, and geared up is kinda Stupid OP, especially when backed by an army of fire breathing dragons and magic flinging undead. lol. this boy has no problems

>baldur starts conquering cities no problem. the wonders actually being well fed, geared up, and surrounded by colleagues that don't hate you can do

>alduin actually likes having sex with baldur just as much as baldur does with him. alduin theorizes it's because akatosh made baldur for him (to stop him, but same difference in the end), and the dragonborn is the most loyal of his followers so he doesn't really care

>the other dragons get jealous of it though. where is THEIR fun reward. why don't THEY get to fuck the champion. whatever alduin is being nice (by world eater standards) now so they can let it slide

>im actually thinking of alduin having baldur's armor designed after himself. walk up in armor that looks like the scales of akatosh's first born to show how much you belong to him. lol

>does alduin fuck him in a conquered city at one point? i can neither confirm nor deny.

#baldur #alduin #nsfwish???#yeah i guess it is #my ocs #if theres more questions i can answer but i just dumped a bunch of baldur information in hope it answers the question

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bottomburt · 7 months

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gonna be a big venty post about a lot of things im sad about

its not gonna be everything obviously

also dont worry, im ok, im absolutely terrified of dying so my life isnt at risk or anything

i honestly hate my apartment, i wish i didnt have to pay 2000+ dollars a month for what feels like a hotel room. i wish i could be in a house. i want to live in a place that feels like where a person would spend their life in, and this apartment just doesnt feel like that. i hate having to use a community laundry area. i want my own laundry room i want a place that feels like an actual fucking home and not a pair of rooms joined together with some extras like a bathroom and a kitchen. i want an actual living space. i want a front and back yard. i dont want to have to climb 2 flights of stairs just to get back home. i hate living in this place. theres roaches every now and then and im scared theyre gonna keep coming back. i hate not having a garage. i hate having a closes thats barely enough to fit most of the things i have. i dont like the general feeling of the people around me. i dont like being around university students. i hate living right next to a shopping center when its loud as fuck late at night. i wish i had chosen something different.

i hate feeling so lonely lately. 3 out of the 7 days in a week im just at my desk or in my bed just waiting until i feel ready to stream and talk to fucking no one for hours on end. i dont want a roommate though because i like the experience of having to take care of myself. it only sucks when im by myself with my own thoughts and nothing to do and everything to think and the sound of my own voice in my own head gets so grating i just want to hear another person speak to me for once. and the days i do have social interactions are just classrooms where im so burnt out from the classes that i just dont have much to say.

my classes are so fucking stressful. im more stressed out about classes than i ever have been. it doesnt help its adding onto the stress of renting an apartment but the classes feel so much more time consuming and exhausting this semester. one of my classes requires 10+ discussion posts on full chapters of reading and i really just am not motivated to do any of it. the in class time is honestly really good and i like my teachers, but the time outside of class just feels like a 30 ton weight on my shoulders that i just have to drag around until may.

i miss inky so much.

i keep ordering food and it really bothers me. i have the greatest opportunity to cook for myself but i either keep ordering food or the times i do cook for myself end up feeling unsatisfying. i feel like im fucking up cooking rice. i dont even know how thats possible. the rice keeps getting weirdly soggy and gross every time i make it and it just hasnt been the same since the first time i made it. i dont know what im fucking up. its so annoying trying to make rice that just doesnt want to turn out how i want it to.

i have so many boxes that i need to throw out but havent had time to. i know it'll make me feel better if i do but i just can never get any sort of motivation to do it.

the light strips i have put up have been barely hung up for months now. theres a big section of the light strip that i havent put back up so like half of it has just been hanging off the wall and honestly ive just been hoping itll fall on its own so i finally have a reason to put it back up properly. itll just stay like that i guess.

im generally unhappy with my streams as of late. its the same feeling ive felt before where i put in so much effort to my streams and it just never feels like it pays off. i could never quit though because i absolutely love streaming, but even just having a tiny piece of the interactivity that other streamers have would be nice.

i think thats all im really sad about, it felt nice to put it somewhere

#vent

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espytalks · 1 year

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Im ready to talk about what happened on sunday. Long post under cut, and to save time, its mostly copy pasted from a convo with a friend, so the tone is a lot more upset than i am now. i added extra thoughts in italics, and fixed typos.

Tldr, i fell into a boat, sustaining minor (but worrying) injuries, and had a big argument with my brother. Everything's fine now.

My brother has a boat, we know friends of the family who has access to a river we can boat on. Hes my brother, i like spending time with him, and he enjoys fishing. Hes super excited about this boat, man. He doesn't have anyone else to hang out with but me, so regardless im kinda pressured to go with him. I want him to be happy, ya know?

And today, we went out, second time ive ever been in a boat, and the truck gets stuck getting the boat in. Not a big deal, we can call my dad later. I have a hard time getting in, but i get in and we have a fun time.

I have severe psoriasis, and the patches on my arms started getting sunburned, so i say we should head back.

Tides low. Man.

He wanted me to get out of the boat. Im fat, man, im short, im not strong. He kept saying i can do it, that i can get out of the boat myself, and that there wasn't any other way, but when i tried, i fell back into the boat, scratching my back and leg enough to draw blood. I landed on my brother, i feel guilty about that cause we were both pinned and i hurt him because of the fall. I barely manage to roll around and get up.

Editing me coming in: i only had his foot pinned. He made it clear when we talked about it that night i didn't hurt him. He was tense at that moment cause we almost capsized, and he was focused on holding the paddle in the water to keep the boat in place, and because of me he couldn't move.

We loose the paddles we needed to push the boat to shore, he uses a fishing rod to reel us towards the paddle, we make it back to a place we could get out, but he still insists i get out first.

I cant, man. Im tired, im still not strong enough, and im scared now, and pissed, and sad, cause falling is one of my biggest fears and it already happened once.

We were actually close to the ramp with the trailer for the boat, so since i couldn't climp up and balance to get on land the hard way, i decided to wade through near waist high water to get to the slope, cause it was easier for me to get out.

Hes pissed. I learned later he heard a gater was in the area, he didn't tell me this info before i jumped in, cause he didn't want me to panic (it would have liked to know that, bro)

Editing again: unrelated but apparently discord has a word limit. Ive never reached it before this point.

I get out, im tired, were both pissed at each other. He wont let me get in the truck to sit down ( i decided to respect this, actually. I coulda said screw you and got in anyways, but i know that woulda been too far)

I sit on the bench, he calls dad to come get me (dad later called me, i gave him more info, and told him the truck was stuck and we needed help) im cold, wet, lost one of my crocs (i have both back, they're fine. Crocs can float, apparently)

We wait for about half an hour or so getting eat up by bugs in the sun and Florida heat.

Dad comes, i get in his truck, dad pulls the truck (and boat, by this point my brother got the boat onto the trailer) out of the water. My brother hands me my stuff, and dad and i leave.

I feel guilty leaving my brother to himself to wrap all that up, but he wasn't too far behind us, i guess, cause he was home by the time i had finished a shower.

Edit: he told me later he needed the time alone, and i shouldn't feel bad.

I washed the scratches as best i could, and put antiseptic on them, but im still worried about whether its gonna be ok. I don't have insurance, actually, and us healthcare is notoriously expensive, so if i get sick from this, i might be screwed. Dad seems to think its fine, i wanna trust him, but i was sitting in wet pants filled with who knows what kinda river germs for almost an hour so. Ya know.

Edit: im probably fine. Nothing looks infected, its been a couple days and i feel alright, and im being careful to make sure i know if anything develops. I have anxiety, so im always gonna worry about it, but i think ill be fine. Also, my favorite pair of pants is kinda ruined. Bummer.

Its been hours since we've all been home, we've ate dinner, ive calmed down, aside from worries about my health, and i know my brothers tired and still a bit upset about it. I think hes calmed down enough that it'll be ok, but im still anxious to really address it. He doesn't like talking about arguments and stuff after they happen, so its hard for me to get closure from events, and it leaves me feeling guilty for a long time. I have issues letting go.

Im tired, im anxious, im sad, im worried about my brother, and i think i don't ever wanna get on a boat again, but im gonna have to, i just know it, if i want him to be happy.

At this point i had a message from my brother, asking me to get him something. Didn't make a bit deal about it, (didn't even mention to my friend what the message was about) but man, im actually a bit miffed, even now. Like,??? He knew what i went through, i was tired sore, and hashtag done?? We talked about everything later, and we're ok now, i vented and we're putting this behind us, but man, he can be annoying. My friend said some reassuring stuff, mentioned it sounded like my brother was pretty rude, and i added this next part on.

Ya know, the worst part?

My brother mainly kept insisting i get out cause he thought i was only holding back because of fear. I kept telling him i couldn't, i physically cant, cause im weak and i have bad balance. He kept giving me the "believe in yourself, you can do it" advice. He didn't believe me when i said it wasn't psychological.

He was rude, but its cause he really loves me, ya know? He cares about me a lot, and he had a lot of faith in me. He's there for me when it counts. He's also just. A bit bossy, and doesn't explain things well, and he thinks he knows best all the time, and gets mad when people don't listen to him.

Im not much better, im kinda a bit of a bitch when im angry, too, but he was clearly a lot more stressed than i was, but he absolutely thought i was panicking when i wasn't.

My brother can be a bit hard to reason with, especially in stressful moments. He kinda gets locked in a mindset, and its usually easier to just let him go through his own motions and let him make mistakes. It usually means i get bossed around. Ive been trying to make it clear to everyone i don't like being treated like a child, but its still something i keep experiencing. When it bothers me a lot, i go and talk about it when everything settles.

He tries to be respectful of me and listen, which is why i tolerate it. We have a good relationship, i swear, its just. Difficult. When hes good, hes great, hes a good person, but hes also got some genuine problems, and so do i, and we need to communicate.

I was really rattled yesterday, basic stuff was thrown off, and i had minor difficulty focusing, and i was really sore. I found a bruise i didn't know i had, and i don't bruise easily. Ive been keeping the antiseptic on everything that needs it, and they're healing well.

He says it'll be a while before we go in that boat again. He does still want to go fishing, but hes gonna take me to various ponds and stuff instead. I just wanna go to the beach. He joked about how we can fish on the beach too. He laughed at the dirty look i gave him. I know hes not that serious.

Also, we saw manatees! I have some video, but it doesn't show em well. Its sad how that was by far not the highlight of the day.

#espy talks #kinda annoying you cant insert a read more on mobile #they should add that #but editing on desktop meant i fixed a lot more typos lol

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