#it's THEIR experience and it's THEIR identity they don't owe you understanding

[newbiealliance]

the sooner yall stop giving a fuck and getting up in arms about how other queer people choose to label THEIR experience the happier you will be i promise. nothing comes of infighting with other queer people over labels you dont understand

[genderqueerdykes]

i have been trying for like. months to explain how the relationship between butch lesbians and trans men is not something akin to polar opposites and this is all i got. like it's not like this:

it's a venn diagram with a massive overlap in the middle. i'm not saying EVERY butch is a trans guy and EVERY trans guy is a butch dyke , i'm just saying it looks more like this:

these are not "mutually exclusive" terms- they do not mean the same thing, but we can be the same people, an very often are. there is a long history of butches who identify as FTM, trans men, drag kings, genderqueer, genderfluid, transmasculine, male, polygender, and two-spirit lesbians, and so much more. the relationship between lesbianism and queer masculinity is inseparable and the only people telling you that butches and trans men need to violently separate from one another and be at each other's throats are terfs. even if we do not share identities, we share our struggle together as heavily misunderstood and unseen masculine queers.

we stand up for each other when our identities get confused by strangers, and we get misgendered. we stand up for each other when terfs and terfpilled people tell us that transmasculine people and men can't be lesbians, when people say "butches just want to be men", when people say "butches aren't real women", when people call each of us bull dykes and trannies, when people mock the way FTMs walk and talk and look, and when people tell trans men they're "just butch dykes in denial". we stand up for each other and understand each others struggles.

whenever a butch lesbian asserts they're a woman no matter how masc they are, whenever a trans man asserts that they are a man and not a butch, whenever a butch struggles to be seen as both a man and a lesbian, and whenever a trans man returns to the lesbian community while embracing their manhood, we are part of the same community, we share the same struggles, and we owe it to each other to stay strong.

we are not enemies. we are bedfellows, lovers, family, spouses, partners, husbands, wives, brothers, sisters, siblings, friends, each others support networks, even if we don't share identities perfectly. whether you are butch and a woman, butch and a man, butch and something else entirely, a male, ftm, genderfluid, polygender, genderqueer, transmasculine, nonbinary, two-spirit or whatever else you may be lesbian, you are part of our family and your experience is worth being heard.

[doin-just-fine]

MAJOR UPDATE: Questioning systems or systems in a doubt spiral pls read.

I recently told my therapist about potentially being a system. This was a scary move because she has previously had some iffy takes about systemhood. But I told her because I trusted that she would meet me where I was at and help me navigate , at the least, the general idea of not understanding my own brain if nothing else which I was ok with. I told her and it went as expected. I explained why I thought I might be a system but also the doubts I had about it and how it was distressing me to not understand myself. She agreed to use the language I was using for it and was happy to help me through (as is her job) and also because whether it was systemhood or not it was something in me that was trying to be seen and we would work on figuring out what it was.

Fast forward a few session, and I was going through another bout of "what the fuck even is my brain". I was starting to realize that my "systemhood" is very different from the things I've been seeing online. In the ways that it's different to other systems is: - I'm always in the front, always in the captains chair - I have no amnesia because I never switch out - My hyper-vigilance never lets me dissociate fully though i definitely "check out" in my own way - Head mates just feel like vague ideas or emotions

But the ways that are similar are: - These vague ideas or emotions have opinions and feelings that are different from my own. - Though they are vague, I can definitely tell they are separate from what I have come to understand as "me" - I become "a different person" in the sense of my attitude, vibe, behavior, and opinions change from where they were 5 mins ago, but I am still me, just a different me.

Anyway, I was already trying to make sense of all of this and was not planning on talking about it with my therapist because nervous... However, my therapist ask me about it first. She asked some clarifying questions about my partners system vs my own and how they are different. When I explained what I just wrote above to my therapist she said "Thats what I thought and I owe you an apology."

Basically, my therapist, like any good therapist should when confronted by something they don't know a lot about, had been doing research on complex forms of trauma and coping. Things in the same vain as CPTSD and Plurality including those two topics. She had specifically been reading a book called "The Body Keeps The Score" (TW it is a book about trauma and studies of trauma so it has details of case studies that some people may find incredibly triggering). I did some research on what exactly the book was talking about in regards to "systemhood" and from what I've found, chapter 14 at the end of a section called "Writing to yourself" and the first parts of chapter 17 have interesting information regarding systemhood and how its not entirely limited to things that are diagnosable like DID or OSDD. It seems to talk about how we all have several selves and trauma can get in the way of those selves communicating effectively. My therapist told me about this book and what she learned from it and apologized to me because the book made her realize that she was wrong and that I was in fact a system....

The session ended and I just kind of sat there... not sure how to feel but definitely feeling relief and validation.

After doing research on the book to write this I have some words of wisdom. If you are a questioning system or are doubting your validity remember this: The human brain is so incredibly complex and no one actually understands how it does anything beyond its basic physical functionality... the conceptual abilities of our mind are a mystery. How we define self is just theory. If you don't fit into boxes, labels, identities, or diagnoses that does not mean your experiences aren't real. You are going to be ok. Understand YOUR mind and how it works for YOU, not through a label or diagnosis. If those things come later, great! Do not let them destroy you just because you don’t fit perfectly. I am a system. Simply. No types, labels, or diagnosis. I am a system. I have a unique experience because my brain is no one elses. I am a system. I may not have people in my head in the traditional sense but I'm also not alone up here either. I am a system. I am a system. I am a system. Nobody has the right to deny me this for they do not live behind my eyes.

As I understand myself: I am a system.

[thatbitchery]

Just in case you needed a guide to human relationships & interactions and how to actually relate to people I have one for you, & it's made of 3 parts.

People are different from you. There's literally not one human being out there exactly like you, you could have an identical twin with the same parents same childhood &c and I promise you you're nothing alike. You've lived such different lives despite 75% similarity in DNA. Understanding that people form their opinions belief systems worldview & c on individual experiences based on their trauma, family dynamics, cultures, home value systems, literally climate etc and we are all different will save you from easily getting triggered when someone doesn't share your opinion bc you're not in their shoes you don't know why they have/that/ opinion so you have no grounds to go feral. People are different from you. Understand this & save yourself the embarrassment of pointless arguments & little virtue locks because you cannot fathom different opinions when it's literally the one single truth. Understand this sk you're not going to war with people on the reblogs for not having the same pov. Yours makes sense to you. Theirs makes sense to, them. Who are you to decide whose is the absolute truth?

You are not a God get off your little high horse you're a human being. People do not owe you worship or discipleship. They don't have to believe everything you say or buy into you. Well within their rights to look at what you say or do and say yeah that's a load of bullshit. You're not a God so you're not always right, remember this the next time you're about to lay your life on the ground over an opinion, you could be wrong. Nothing will hurt you more than that thewizardliz my way or no way mindset. Remember the things you used to defend with your life when you were like 10 that you're rn absolutely disgusted by? Leave space & never speak in absolutes & never degrade another's opinion to the ground, you could be wrong & it will be very very very embarrassing for you when you find out you were.

Everyone is right, all the time. There is no absolute in this universe. Unlearn debates they're mighty pointless, everyone is right every single time. Truth is very subjective so the girl that has been traumatized by M3n saying all m3n deserve d3ath is right, if you were her you'd say the same thing and the v3gan is right & the carnivore is right & the conservative is right & the liberal is right- because everyone is right all the time and I promise if you were in their shoes, you'd see it. You'd see it. Even when someone Says the dumbest stuff known to existence, from where they are standing, they're right. Debates are pointless. Extremely. You can not fathom the kind of life others have had, not even your siblings or children- what then gives you the confidence to decide what should be right to them? Know your place.

So human interactions work better when you understand these, they just do. Once you no longer feel the need to justify your pov because you know you're literally the only one with it it's just makes things, easier thats why the apostle Paul said to never argue with people about opinions, its useless & tempts them and you to sin. It makes you more understanding & empathetic & pleasant & sophisticated to be around, it's the winners draw. You unlearn the need to argue because you know they'll never see it like you and you'll never see it like them so you take the high road and find middle ground or nod along and go home or find a way to say I don't agree, but I can accommodate that you think like that, and watch how people completely flock to you. There's no power , at all, to 'my way or no way' find your own little planet & leave that thewizardliz mindset on YouTube. Human beings are social relational creatures, part of relationships is accommodation.

[frogsare-friends]

friendly reminder that bi people don't owe you anything. bi women that have a 99% preference for men are bi, not straight. bi women that have a 99% preference for women are bi, not lesbian. bi women that choose to only date women (for safety, comfort, etc.) are bi and do not want to be lesbians. heteroromantic bisexuals and biromantic heterosexuals are whatever they tell you they are, you don't get to decide their identity. bi men with a 99% preference for women are bi, not straight. bi men with a 99% preference for men are bi, not gay. bi people that align more with pansexuality but say that they're bi are bi. asking someone that's talking about what you view as the opposite gender to "name someone of (what you view as) the same gender that you think is hot" is biphobic. asking someone if they're sure they're "not just heteroflexible" is biphobic. nonbinary bi people don't need to explain their sexuality or gender to you; "but how can they be straight and gay if they're nonbinary?!?!" 1. gender is so fucked, i personally believe nobody's gender is the exact same we all experience gender differently, 2. bisexual isn't half straight and half gay, it's all bi

brought to you by a genderqueer bisexual who's fucking tired. if you're monosexual (yes that goes for straight people, gay men, and lesbians, although most queer people have an easier time understanding it than straight people do and perpetuate biphobia in different ways) and you view bisexuality as half anything, you're wrong. we're not attracted to anyone in a straight or gay way, we're attracted to all people in a bi way. hope that helps

[da-birb-writes-sometimes]

Hi, I discovered your writing today and I loved it. So I wanted to request the frist years with a partner who is gender fluid.

First Years With a Genderfluid Partner

Characters; Ace Trappola, Deuce Spade, Jack Howl, Epel Felmier, Sebek Zigvolt

Content; Genderfluid reader (I don't use pronouns though, since everyone's experience is different), fluff, crack, romance, some implications that strangers are rude but not in detail

Word Count; 600+

Author's Note; Sorry that these are pretty short anon (brain is being mean), but I hope that you enjoy!

Ace Trappola

He’s still a little imp, regardless of everything else. But he’s perceptive. He notices the small things; and he’ll reaffirm you as well.

“Huh, they’re not all that bright if they can’t see that you’re obviously the coolest person around,” he’d scoff. “I mean, my dad only allows me one gender- OW WHY DID YOU HIT ME?!”

But he would say things like that, but he does in fact think you are the coolest person around. 

He does take mental notes; of what terms make you happy (pronouns and pet names), what clothing makes you comfortable, and more. No, he doesn’t keep a little notebook, but he has it memorized. 

Deuce Spade

Always checks in to make sure that you’re comfortable; he doesn’t want to screw up, even if it’s something you may consider small. He’s just trying his best and wants you to be happy.

“Wait, do I call you my boyfriend, girlfriend, joyfriend, partner? I want to make sure that you’re okay with it.” He asks that question pretty often, since he wants to make sure that you’re okay with it; you always come first.

He learns more about your identity, only because he’s curious and feels that he needs to do so. Please tell him to put the books down and just come and hang out.

Well-meaning but a little too gung-ho. He just doesn’t want to mess up, but he also wants you to be happy. 

Jack Howl

The most normal of the group; he likes you for you and nothing changes really. He’ll touch in though, making sure that you’re comfortable.

He would let you (within reason) try out some hairstyles or makeup that you want to try out on him. He doesn’t really mind, plus sometimes it takes looking at someone else to realize that that look is indeed a look and a great one at that.

Jack is a pretty large guy, so if you’re smaller than him he raises a brow at you stealing his clothes. But if you’re larger than him? He might wear one of your outfits (he likes lowkey matching outfits couples do).

Super understanding if you have ‘blah’ days, and will let you vent to him. He may not have much to say, but he’s there when you need him.

Scary dog privilege #1

Epel Felmier

He would come to learn more about your identity throughout your friendship before the two of you started dating. May have messed up here and there at the start, but not anymore.

The accent will be coming out if someone is being rude towards you, and Epel doesn’t care if he gets scolded or not; no one treats you rudely and gets away with it.

Pomefiore also helps him understand that gender is a spectrum; nothing is wholey masculine or feminine, that they blur, and that blurring is beautiful. 

“Pardner” is one of his go-to endearments; you’re his partner (in both the romantic, but also if either of you feel like committing felonies).

Scary dog privilege #1.5 (scary like a very yappy pomeranian way)

Sebek Zigvolt

Sebek definitely knows a few people who are genderfluid back in Briar Valley; fae live for a long time, so playing with gender is pretty normal. He commends you for being honest with yourself.

Now, he is putty in your hands, absolutely WHIPPED for you. You thought the praise he was singing for Malleus was bad? Well, multiply that by fifty.

But it’s quiet, not shouted. Yes, it is still obvious for anyone to see; the way he holds your hand and looks at you. You are the royal of his heart; his Monarch, King, and Queen.

Would be semi-awkward if the two of you went to a pride event; he just doesn’t know what to really do. He's having fun, just awkward.

Scary Dog Privilege #2

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Tag List; @afunkyfreshblog @bloomstruck @eynnwwyjth @ithseem @krenenbaker @leonistic @lucid-stories @ryker-writes @syrenkitsune @the-v-lociraptor @xxoomiii

[rqteaparty]

HEY RADICAL QUEERS!!

here's a friendly reminder for all of you that:

❥ you are your own being, you do not owe an explanation to anyone of your existence. if they refuse to understand you, they can kick rocks!

❥ it's okay to disagree with other radqueers, it's okay to dislike them. you don't have to get along with everyone.

❥ bullying and infighting will do nothing but make the community worse. isn't the point of being a radqueer to include and welcome everyone regardless of their identity and experience? isn't the point to judge people based on their current actions, rather than their thoughts?

❥ use. the. block. button!!! please curate your own experience! take care of yourself!

❥ the most radqueer thing you can do is love each other. the most radical form of protest is love and compassion. the greatest weapon we as a community can wield is support and community. i see you fighting. keep going, we've got you.

[hurtspideyparker]

Peter idolized Mysterio extremely fast, because Beck knew exactly how to manipulate the kid.

He watched him, did his research. He knew who what Peter needed.

Tony Stark.

The entire world was asking Spider-Man if he was the new Tony Stark. Captain America, Black Widow, Iron Man, all gone. the Avengers had been ripped apart when they saved the world, and now civilians were scared. Who would protect them if things like that were out there? Spider-Man was the only one standing up and still fighting for his city, he was mentored by Iron Man. Surely he would step up.

Peter felt the pressure, the questions. Even Fury was trying to push him to be the next Tony, fulfill his duty as an Avenger.

But Beck stood up for him.

"He's not bored, he's just thinking about how you kidnapped him"

He understands Peter wants to enjoy time with his friends, with MJ.

"You're not a jerk for wanting a normal life kid"

Everyone else was adamant though.

"Stark chose you. He made you an Avenger. I need that, the world needs that. Maybe Stark was wrong."

Here Fury is telling him that not stepping up would be failing the world, failing Stark. Putting words into the mouth of Peter's dead mentor.

Everyone knows that Tony Stark is Peter's weak spot-

"Tony did a lot for me so, I owe it to him. To everybody"

But Beck is always a step ahead.

He sets himself up as the knight in shining arming, showing up right when the world needs him, after all the heroes had fought and died and disappeared. (Iron Man was the first superhero the world had seen since Captain America. Peter worshipped him since he was a little kid. He burst into Peter's life, gave him an incredible suit, and cleaned up his messes).

He lifts Peter up when he's down. "Don't ever apologize for being the smartest in the room" "a part of me wants me to tell you to turn around, run away from all this". (Tony was the only one smart enough to understand how smart Peter was, too. Told him to stay away from the big stuff and help the little guy. He followed Mr. Stark onto that spaceship after being told to go home over and over).

He becomes a mentor. "It's really nice to have someone to talk to about superhero stuff, y'know" Peter tells him. It's painfully reminiscent of being 15, blowing up the phone with texts and voicemails because Mr. Stark was the only one who knew his identity and knew what it was like to be a hero. The way he'd look at Tony with eager eyes every time they were face to face, just happy to be seen. He'd had to fight so hard for Tony to listen to him, and losing it was... harder than he realized.

So here Beck is, a better hero than Spider-Man, more supportive than Fury- and then he asks the perfect question:

"What do you want, Peter?"

He lets the kid imagine a better life, a life where he isn't the next Iron Man. He looks up at Beck and sees his escape, sees someone far more qualified. Not only would it be an out for Peter, but the world would simply be better off with Mysterio.

"the world needs the next Iron Man, it needs to be an adult with some experience, who's good like Tony Stark, like you"

Everyone made it so easy for Beck- they broke Peter's self-esteem down till he was certain he couldn't be the next Iron Man. Denied him at every turn a piece of a normal life, any balance. Everyone was so desperate for a hero that no one questioned when Beck strolled in, charmed everyone, and proved himself the only solution.

Peter is 16. He's a kid. He lost so many years already; with his parents, his uncle, with gaining super powers. He lost Tony, his support system. He's desperate for an adult to take this burden from him.

For the next Tony Stark.

So he takes Edith, the physical symbol of his responsibility, and hands it to the nearest capable adult.

I just wanted to be like you!

And I wanted you to be better.

Peter Parker is not Tony Stark.

[jewishvitya]

I just wanted to thank you so much for all of your insight and generosity with your perspective as an anti-zionist israeli, something you absolutely don't owe us but I feel immense amounts of respect and admiration for. from an American jew, it's been so valuable to know there are people like you out there, it's made everything feel much less hopeless despite all the hopelessness. I've felt very alone recently, surrounded by all the Jewish people in my life who are pro-israel and don't seem to grasp the gravity of the situation and my pro-palestine gentile friends, and I've felt very alone in my grief as I've only really started to unpack and dismantle my own biases very recently. reading your posts and your perspective on everything has just made me feel very seen as a jew in this situation, especially as I try to reconcile my feelings about everything going on with my own feelings about my faith and my identity.

you've probably seen that I've gone through a lot of your posts and that I've followed you. i just want you to know that I'm not necessarily following you just for that, I know you're just a fandom blog, it's just that after looking through your posts I feel like you're just a really nice person and seeing yoi on my dash from you would be endearing coming from you even though im not into it myself.

just. thank you again for sharing your story and continuing to share. you have no idea how much it's helped me.

I'm in tears. I've been crying way more than usual over the past couple of months, but it's nice for a change to have those tears to come from being touched instead of grief. I apologize if I'm going to ramble.

You say I didn't owe you all this, but I do feel responsible. I'm watching so much destruction and seeing how comfortable people around me are with the loss of life. This is why I've been talking about what we do and not as much about the impact of October 7 on me or people I know. I did a bit of that in the beginning, but pretending it was the start of everything to keep going back to that one day, after two months of horror, as if I can't count past 7... I didn't choose to be born where I am, I didn't choose to grow up in the most extremist community this place has to offer. But since I'm here, since I'm comfortable at the expense of Palestinians and violence is being done in my name and I have the tools to highlight issues within my society, I think it's a moral obligation.

I know how I talk about things here, and that's genuinely because I don't want to minimize the severity of the racism and the nationalism in Israel. And someone perceived my words as showing hatred for Israelis. But... I love my people. I don't expect those who see or experience our violence to feel the same or even understand me, but I do. It's my neighbors and my childhood friends and my family. It's children I see playing outside and getting excited when they see I have a cat, and the random people who stop me in the street and give me directions if they think I look lost.

Even growing up in the West Bank settlements, the people were very good to me. I needed years to internalize the fact that this kindness doesn't get extended to you if you're not part of the in-group. It broke my heart. It still does. Seeing people who I know are capable of kindness and compassion, hardening themselves against the pain of other human beings. Closing their eyes and telling themselves it isn't real. It's all an act.

I told a friend I feel like I'm betraying my mom, who was deeply bigoted, but also a wonderful mother. She taught me a lot of the principles that are guiding me now - I just took down the walls she put around who deserves to be considered. She'd be horrified with seeing the things I'm saying if she was still alive. But she taught me to care about people, I just decided it means all people.

Everyone should be prioritizing Palestinian liberation, and at the same time, I care about this too. I care about the morality of my people. I need us to be better than this. I want to dismantle the nationalism that teaches us hate and violence so we can start to heal and come to terms with what we did (and still do) here. I want us to fix what we can and hold ourselves accountable. I want us to reimagine safety in a way that doesn't cause harm, and build good relationships with the rest of humanity. Every marginalized community is experiencing bigotry in interactions with every other community, that's just how these things work. But I believe healing the world, and healing my society, is possible.

And it's hard, because so much of what we learn is rooted in truth. Antisemitism is real. Millennia of persecution are real. The trauma we carry is real. If the idea of an ethnostate makes us feel safe, and the idea of losing it makes us scared, how do we differentiate between fear as a natural reaction to antisemitic violence and fear that was taught to us for the sake of nationalism? Especially those of us living in Israel, immersed in the propaganda. It doesn't matter in practice, our feelings of safety or fear don't justify an ethnostate, especially not one built on top of another nation, but it matters for the conversations I have with people.

And I said that the violence I'm seeing feels like an attack on my identity. Seeing a giant hannukiyah in Gaza, when Hannukah tells the story of occupied people fighting off their oppressors. Seeing images that echo so much of the horrors that were done to us. The Magen David being used with hate and spite. It's all so painful. And I love this land, it's the only home I've known, so seeing us destroying nature and soaking it with blood and calling that connection?

Judaism does guide me here. The concept of tikkun olam. The idea of לא עליך המלאכה לגמור ולא אתה בין חורין לבטל ממנה - doing what I can, even if what I'm able to do isn't some decisive blow that entirely turns the tide. The idea that every human being is a whole entire world, to me it means that every single person alive is worth fighting for. So no matter how much death I see, there's still worlds more to save.

And Jewitches had this post that felt just healing to read. Nationalism hijacked our culture, and it will always leave a mark for centuries into the future. But I'm not letting go, and I'm not letting that create a rift between me and thousands of years full of history I can be proud of.

I feel your grief. And I'm grateful for the anti-zionist Jews I met by talking about this, because honestly, I need you people in my life. The pain and the anger are both easier to hold together.

So, thank you for following. I might follow back, just to see you around on my feed. And thank you for sending this. Feel free to message me anytime for any reason (I promise it won't result in a lecture every time).

Also, your url gave me pjo nostalgia

[obsessivefreakandpartners]

My boys are brothers and I hate that people don't acknowledge it much!

Androids can't reproduce like humans do! They have to be manually created from the start! So what? That doesn't mean anything tho, pure technicalities!

Just because they are from the same creator doesn't mean they don't have family connections between them. I mean, we have the same creator, God too! You could say that all humans are brothers, but some brothers are more brothers than other ones and that has to do with:

Having the same parents: RK boys were built by the same company leadership

Being created for the same reason such as continuing the family legacy to name one, : RK androids are created to be a whole new line of autonomous beings, thus, having common purposes under the same "roof" ( Cyberlife always owes androids, they just give them to foster homes for profit)

Predecessor/ successor: If something goes wrong with one RK, it can affect the ones that come after it. For example, Cyberlife doubles down on its updates on RK900 after witnessing some errors with RK700. Parents do the same things with younger siblings after realising their errors with the eldest ones.

I mean think about it; Markus requests that androids take over Cyberlife to ensure the continuation of the species. Isn't it logical that his kid with North will probably have an identical serial number with his parents and some resemblance after them? And if they get to have a second kid, will it be the same line with its older sibling?

It's what they probably do out of emotion. Most human parents have that too; you, their kid, get their last name and strong genetic components that have to do with your resemblance after them. It's just, androids can have more control over it.

Just because Cyberlife created them for all the wrong reasons or that they don't grow up together doesn't make them any less brothers.

It has to do more with Cyberlife being a terrible, toxic "parent". Terrible toxic human parents are everywhere in the real world, pumping out kid after kid for all the wrong reasons, manipulating them and damaging them for their own ulterior motives.

Plus androids do not grow up like humans do nor do they experience time the same way; all it takes is some true connection and understanding in real time between them to build on their family connections.

Well, them being RK doesn't mean they have to care about each other! Lots of human brothers don't! You are right! Brothers kill each other every day like Markus and Connor can do so if Connor machine.

But they can; if you play your cards right, Markus and Connor connect and win over the public opinion and the government together.

If the revolution is successful and the world opens up to androids and gives Cyberlife to them, the already created rk900 will wake up and have a chance to live a life and connect with his older brothers.

Carl is found family to Markus. Hank is family found to Connor ( I think it's a romantic family, but anyway ).

Let's give more love to their "biological family too": each other. They can be just as important if cultivated properly.

PS: RK boys remind me of the archangels in the Supernatural series that is inspired by the bible. They are much more powerful than common angels, with a more unique personality and closeness to each other for better or for worse than the rest of the angels. All angels are technically brothers, but archangels are built at the same timeline, meant to be more advanced, to serve the same purpose ( obey god's will in a more active, leadership kind of role) with extreme power and they have a closer, more complicated experience with God and with each other; they fight battles together or antagonize each other in a way your average joe angel could never with them.

Connor is more equal to Markus than the rest of the Jericho members are. Markus feels like he leads them, like he has the upper hand over them, for all the good reasons tho. But Connor can disrupt everything he has built for or be the catalyst to the success of his dream. I feel like Markus talks to him like they are equals with the subtle undertones of "oldest brother already having found his way/ younger brother having difficulty" dynamic.

[trillscienceofficer]

I'm rewatching "Dark Frontier" and my partner asked 'is this when Seven is hallucinating?' and I was like... when isn't Seven hallucinating, actually

I was talking about this recently with @avoicefromthestars, I don't know of many fanworks that explore this aspect of Seven's issues in depth or explicitly, but it's a huge deal during her time on Voyager... Seven keeps having sensory hallucinations that regularly put her in harm's way and if she doesn't hurt herself irreversibly it's because the crew understands this about her (ever since "The Raven" at least) and knows Seven can't control when or how it will happen again. I admit my own ignorance on this topic but I think the scifi metaphor of her Borg-ness is once again just paper-thin and, although diagnosing fictional characters is a complicated subject and not something I would do lightly, you could easily interpret Seven as suffering from some form of psychosis. I would at least argue that having Seven not being impacted in her daily life from said hallucinatory episodes is explicitly contradicting her canon depiction on Voyager.

It's also interesting (and again I owe @avoicefromthestars for pointing it out) that Star Trek: Picard hinted at Seven still suffering from (occasional?) trouble with understanding what is real and what isn't. I laughed a lot about that scene in season 2 where she's writing the Euler identity on a mirror, but seen in light of Seven's lifelong experience with hallucinatory episodes it's likely just a part of a checklist she has come up with in order to determine what is going on, on her own. I doubt Seven could depend on other people reliably once she left the Voyager crew and set out on her own; also can't imagine it was an easy transition, especially combined with all her other healthcare-related needs (ie regenerating regularly while on the move). I have to wonder what it took for Seven to get to that checklist, and what it cost her while she figured it out.

[runningpsychic]

Why Goodbye Volcano High resonates with me as...

...a musician

As a musician, it's hard not to immediately identify with Fang. What musician doesn't want their music to be heard, to play at music festivals, and have music as their career. I can wax poetic about how music is about self expression and it doesn't matter if I have an audience, but in the end, I still want my music to be heard, and enjoyed. And Fang is on track to making this their entire career.

Making music has been a minor hobby for me. Even as a kid, I knew there's almost no chance I can make it as a musician, so I went down the route of being a software engineer instead. It's such a minor part of my life that I don't even bother identifying as a musician, I just fool around with instruments. But something about GVH ignited that passion in me, and during my first playthrough, I wrote six songs inspired by themes in the game. Even if I'll stay an amateur, I want to make the most from life, and not let the fire die. (See last section)

All that said, I felt very bad for Fang throughout the game. I know how tough the life of a full time musician is. The industry is just completely screwed. And unlike me, Fang doesn't have another option other than music. The game also drives it in that Fang's friends all have viable career paths, while Fang doesn't. But then, the meteor throws an interesting wrench into this, as now Fang is the only one who achieved their dreams. I'm not sure what the point of this paragraph is besides fuck capitalism, give musicians a living wage.

...an enby

Fang really made me more comfortable about being non-binary. It's amazing seeing enby representation that doesn't feel shoehorned in, or merely an afterthought. It's actually integral to the story. Both Fang and Sage struggle having their parents take their identities seriously, and that mirrors my own fears of not being taken seriously as an enby myself, which leads me to only come out as non-binary to my closest friends, and just remain a binary trans woman to everyone else.

It's honestly amazing to see everyone in Caldera Bay being accepting of the queer cast, like being queer isn't a big deal at all. And that's how it should be. Everyone just calls Fang by their name and pronouns (except their parents of course), and no one seems to mind that Reed brought Alvin to prom. This really makes me feel more comfortable about my identity, and I feel proud to be queer. We don't owe them normal.

...an immigrant

It's so rare to see stories about the intersection of being trans and being an immigrant, so when I read Rosa's story, I felt it must've been written by someone who also has first hand experience. There's a distinct feel from my family that me being trans is a "western" thing, not something they could ever understand. Or worse, that I'm being corrupted by "the west" in some way by moving there. There's so much extended family I can never see again because I'm now an abomination of the family tree.

I find it really difficult to talk about this as I fear I'd be misread as being racist for suggesting that my home country is more queerphobic or something, but that isn't my point. I just want to tell my story, and my experience of being alienated for both culture and gender, in both my origin and destination countries, is one that most folks can't emphasize with. (Venba also does do a good job with the culture part, so you should check that out too)

There's a separate rant about how this brand of queerphobia was actually planted by Christian missionaries and not at all "traditional culture", but that's for another time.

...someone struggling with mental health

I've been obsessed with the game for months since I played it. I went through what everyone calls "Dino depression", but I think it really helped me, and it was the game I needed to play at this moment in my life. I struggle with depression and burnout. At times it can be hard to know what the point is, or feel that any of this is worth it. The first few weeks after the game, I actually felt more depressed, as I thought about what the point of life is if it all is temporary anyway, and what I would do if a meteor were to hit in 8 months. And I was scared, because I felt like my life wasn't under my control. Over time, I've learned to think about it more positively. If life is temporary, then it's up to me to make the most of it. If life has no meaning, it's up to me to make my own meaning. I have amazing friends around me, and I still have tons of music to make.

[jeannereames]

Shows or movies based on historic figures and events are hard to pull off if the goals are to be both entertaining and somewhat true to history. If we accept that some inaccuracies can't be avoided in order to appeal to audiences what would you consider cornerstones and pillars about Alexander and his history that can't/shouldn't be touched in order to paint a somewhat realistic picture in media based on him and his life?

I saved this to answer around the time of the Netflix release. For me, there are four crucial areas, so I’ll break it down that way. Also. I recognize that the LENGTH of a production has somewhat to do with what can be covered.

But, first of all…what story is one telling? The story arc determines where the focus lies. Even documentaries have a story. It’s what provides coherence. Is it a political tale? A military one? Or personal? Also, what interpretation to take, not only for Alexander but those around him. Alexander is hugely controversial. It’s impossible to make everyone happy. So don't try. Pick an audience; aim for that audience.

MILITARY:

Alexander had preternatural tactical skills. His strategy wasn’t as good, however, especially when younger. Tactics can be a genius gift (seeing patterns), but strategy requires experience and knowledge of the opposition. The further into his campaign, the more experience he gained, but the cultures became increasingly unfamiliar. He had ups and downs. He was able to get out of Baktria finally by marrying Roxana. That was strategy, not tactics. He beat Poros, then made a friend of him; that’s strategy. Yet he failed to understand the depth of the commitment to freedom among the autonomous tribes south along the Indus, which resulted in a bloody trek south. And his earlier decision to burn Persepolis meant he’d never fully reconcile the Persian elite.

So, it’s super important to emphasize his crazy-mad tactical gifts in all forms of combat, from pitched battles to skirmishes to sieges. Nobody in history ever equaled him except maybe Subatai, Genghis Khan’s leading general. In the end, I think that’s a lot of Alexander’s eternal fascination. He fought somewhere north of 250 battles, and lost none (where he was physically present).

But HOW to show that? What battles to put on screen? Oliver Stone combined three into one + Hydaspes because he had only 2-3.5 hours (depending on which cut you watch). The Netflix series is going to show all four of the major pitched battles…or at least all 3 for the 6-episode first part. They had circa 4.5 hours to play with, but they cut out other things, like Tyre.

Another issue, from the filming/storytelling point-of-view is how to distinguish Issos from Gaugamela for the casual viewer. They’re virtually identical in tactics (and players on the field). So it made a fair bit of sense to me for Stone to conflate them. In a documentary, it’s more important to separate them, largely to discuss the fall-out.

Some v. important clashes weren’t the Big Four. Among these, the sieges of Halikarnassos and Tyre are probably the most impressive. But the Aornos Rock in India was another amazing piece. I’d also include the bridging of the Indus River to illustrate the astonishing engineering employed. Again, if I had to pick between Halikarnassos and Tyre, I’d pick Tyre. I was a bit baffled by Netflix’s decision to show Halikarnassos instead, but I think it owed to an early error in the scripts, where they had Memnon die there. I corrected that, but they’d already mapped out the beats of the episodes, so they just kept Halikarnassos. That’s fine; it was a major operation, just not his most famous siege.

Last, I really wish somebody, someday, will do something with his Balkan campaigns. What he did in Thrace and Illyria, at just 21, showed his iron backbone and quick thinking. It’d make a great “and the military genius is born” set-up, drama wise. But you could use the Sogdian Rock to show the clever streak, at least (“Find men who can fly” … “I did; look up.” Ha) Plus it has the advantage of being where he (maybe) found Roxana.

Last, he fought extremely well--wasn't just good at tactics. Being a good general doesn’t necessarily mean one’s a good fighter. He was. Almost frighteningly brave, so show that too.

RELIGIOUS:

Ya gotta deal with the “Did he really think he was a god?” thing, and the whole trip to Siwah. I obviously don’t think he believed he was a god; it’s one of the things I disliked about the Netflix show’s approach, but they were dead-set on it. I DO think he came to believe he was somehow of divine descent, but of course, that’s not the same as most moderns understand it, as I’ve explained elsewhere. It made him a hero, not a god on a level with Zeus, and to ME, that’s an important distinction that Netflix (and to some degree Stone) rode roughshod over.

But I’d like to see more inclusion of sacrifice and/or omen-reading—religion in general. Cutting the Gordion Knot (omens!). His visit to Troy (Netflix tackled that one). A really cool thing would be to make more of the lunar eclipse before Gaugamela. Again, Netflix touched on that, but it’s one of those chance events that might actually have affected a battle’s outcome, given how seriously the ancient near east took sky omens. (A solar eclipse once halted a battle.) The Persians were freaked out. Even his massacre of the Branchidai in Sogdiana was driven by religion, not military goals. Pick a couple and underscore them.

I give Stone big props for the sacrifice before the Granikos/Issos/Gaugamela battle. It was so well-done, I’ve actually shown it in my classes to demonstrate what a battlefield sphagia sacrifice would look like.

Alexander was deeply religious. Show it.

POLITICAL:

Ah, for ME the most interesting stuff surrounding Alexander occurs at the political level. Here’s where the triumph story of his military victories all went south. He knew how to win battles. He was less good at managing what he’d conquered.

In terms of a story arc, the whole period up to Gaugamela is really the “rise” of the story. Post-Gaugamela, things began to collapse. And I would pin the turn on PERSEPOLIS. Yes, burning it sent home a message of “Mission accomplished.” But he was selective about it. Areas built by Darius I were spared, Xerxes’ were destroyed: a damnio memoriae.

Problem: Persepolis embodied Persia, and ATG essentially shat on it. Not a good look for the man who wanted to replace Darius III. That he also failed to capture and/or kill Darius created an additional problem for him. Finally, his lack of understanding of how politics worked in Baktria-Sogdiana resulted in an insurgency. Bessos was going to rebel, regardless. But Spitamanes might not have. Alexander created his own mess up there.

Another matter to look at is why he created a new title—King of Asia—instead of adopting the Persian title (King-of-Kings). I don’t think that was a “mistake.” He knew perfectly well the proper Persian title (Kshāyathiya)…and rejected it. He adopted some Persian protocol, but not all of it. After the summer of 330, he was essentially running two parallel courts, which seemed to satisfy neither the Persians nor his own men. (Kinda like docudramas are a hybrid that seems to annoy perhaps more than satisfy.)

So I’d like to see this handled with some nuance, but it’s intrinsically difficult to do—even while, if done well, it would be the most interesting part of an Alexander story, imo.

So, what events, what events…3-4 leap out after Alexander’s adoption of some Persian dress. The Philotas Affair, the Pages Conspiracy, the Death of Kleitos, the marriage to Roxana. I’d show it all, although I could also understand reducing the two conspiracies to one, for time, in which case, the Philotas Affair because it resulted in the fall of Parmenion. But the fact there were two, not just one, tells a story itself.

What about the proskynesis thing with Kallisthenes? I’ve come to disbelieve it ever happened, even though it’s symbolic of the whole problem. So, weirdly, I’m of two minds about showing it. OTOH, it won’t be in my own novels. But OTOH, I could easily see why a showrunner or director might want to include it. And it certainly appears in several of the histories, including Arrian.

Then we have the two indisciplines (mutinies)…one in India that made ATG turn around, and another at Opis. They’re really two different things as one was an officer’s rebellion, the other the soldiers themselves. But will viewers be able to distinguish between them? It’s like the Issos/Gaugamela problem, or for that matter, the two conspiracies. They’re similar enough to confuse the casual viewer. “Didn’t we already see that?”

But if they were narrowed to one, how to choose? The mutiny on the Hyphasis provides an explanation for why he turned back. But the Opis event was more dramatic. The man jumped down into the middle of a rioting crowd and started (essentially) knocking heads together! So if I had to pick…Opis. The other might could be mentioned in retrospect.

PERSONAL:

Here are five things I think really OUGHT to be shown, or that I have yet to be pleased by.

1) Philip isn’t an idiot and should get more than 10 minutes of screentime. Oh, and show Alexander did learn things from him. Stone had to make his movie a Daddy-Issues flick, and the Netflix thing did very little with Philip as they wanted to get to the Alexander-Darius face off (which was the meat of their story). But there’s a very interesting love/competition story there.

2) Olympias is not a bitch and was not involved in Phil’s murder, although I can see why that is catnip to most writers. She did kill Eurydike’s baby and (by extension) Eurydike. One of the historians in the Netflix story (Carolyn, unless I misremember) talked about the rivalry between the two wives, at least. But I think ATG planned to marry the widow and Olympias got rid of her to prevent it. Now THAT’S a story, no? But they were in too much of a hurry to get to Persia.

3) Alexander was not an only child! He had sisters (and a brother) with whom he was apparently close…and a cousin who was his real rival. To me, missing that cousin rivalry overlooks a juicy personal/political story! Too often all the focus winds up on Alexander-Olympias-Philip-Eurydike-Attalos, but man, a more subtle showrunner could do a lot with the Alexander-Amyntas rivalry. But he’s constantly cut out. I can’t think of a documentary that actually addresses Amyntas except in passing (if at all)l

4) Hephaistion’s importance is a must, but I’d like to see him treated as someone with a personality and authority of his own, besides just as ATG’s lover. At least Netflix Went There onscreen with the love-story part, but otherwise, the writers couldn’t figure out what to do with him. Neither Stone nor Netflix really portrayed him as his own person. I do understand why they can’t show the whole cast of characters. I had to do weeding myself in the novels, but I’m annoyed Netflix showed only Hephaistion and Ptolemy. Where’s Perdikkas (so important all along really, but certainly later)? Or Philotas, Kleitos, Krateros, Leonnatos, Lysimachos (later king of Thrace)? I think viewers could probably have handled at least another 5 people, especially if introduced gradually, not all at the beginning.

This brings me to….

5) Alexander’s apparently very real affection for the people in his orbit, from personal physician (Philip) to childhood pedagogue (Lysimachos [not same as above]) to Aristotle to various other philosophers. He was so loyal to his friends, in fact, he initially jailed the people who brought word of Harpalos’ first flight.

He needed to be loved/appreciated and wanted to give back to people. Yes, generosity was expected of kings, and as a king (THE king), his generosity had to excel that of anybody else. But he seemed to genuinely enjoy giving presents. I think of him like that one friend who heard you say you liked that cute pair of “Hello, Kitty” socks…then 6 months later they’re your Christmas present from them. Some of his gifts were grandiose, but not always. I love the dish of little fish (probably smelts) that he sent to Hephaistion, presumably just because his friend liked smelts!

To me, point #5 would be easy to get in with a skilled scriptwriter, tucked into the corners of other scenes. It’d be fun to highlight the personal side. If we can believe Plutarch, he was a PRODIGIOUS letter-writer. Also, he loved to hunt, so that’s another thing. And he loved the theatre, and to watch sport. These would all be very humanizing details.

I think the biggest issue is that most of these documentaries/docudramas are done by people who don’t know squat about Alexander aside from a few things, before deciding to make a documentary/movie about him, or write a book. Their research is shallow, and even if they bring on the experts, they don’t always listen. Stone DID at least have a long fascination with ATG, but it caused him to try to throw in everything but the kitchen sink. It wasn't as bad of a film as some have made it out to be, just horribly bloated and for all his reading, he never understood the WORLDVIEW. I wrote about that some while back in my review.

The best documentary/movie would be told by an actual specialist who knew enough at the outset to craft a better, more complex story arc.

Or maybe I’m just biased because I tried to do that myself in my novels. 😂😂😂😂

[spite-of-the-grifter]

People who engage in queer discourse seriously need to be reminded of what being queer actually *is*.

It's not fitting into heteronormative standards.

It's not fitting into amatonormative standards.

It's not fitting into gender norms and doing stuff that makes YOU happy. It's taking control of your own body and doing what feels right instead of something that you felt forced/were forced into. This INCLUDES intersex people.

Just because you don't understand someone's identity does not mean you can't be supportive and it does NOT mean you get to tell people whether they do or don't belong in the queer community. They don't owe you thing about a DAMN thing in terms of an explanation in order to justify their queerness. If they say they're queer, they're queer. If not, they're not.

And again. This INCLUDES aro/ace/aroace spec people. It INCLUDES cishet aro/ace/aroace spec people.

It INCLUDES straight trans people. Anyone gnc who identifies with being straight or cis in any way. He/him lesbians, she/her gay dudes, agender people, pangender, it/its, who actually gives a fuck??

This INCLUDES intersex people.

This INCLUDES people who use neo pronouns/identities. It INCLUDES micro labels, even the most obscure ones you haven't heard of because you know what? They use it because it makes them feel good.

It INCLUDES the "cringe" people you think are too weird to be associated with. You can't make up someone's mind about whether they belong especially when they're disabled and have already been excluded from a lot of shit for most of their life, not to mention it's really insulting. Even if they're just "weird" or some shit and not disabled at all, still!! Don't be an asshole! I can't believe I have to say this to a group of people whose entire thing is acceptance and unconditional love for differences, but if you don't accept people in your own group who are different from you, you are the problem!!

Queer just means you don't fit into society's view of what "love" or your sense of self means and I PROMISE you that all these people and all others included in the LGBTQ *Plus* know themselves better than you do. You can ask, politely, if you're curious, but no one owes you an explanation and if they feel like they belong, just leave them be and ignore them if you're really so stuck-up you can't handle queer people who are "weird" or "different" to your idea of queer. Because if YOU are deciding who does and does not get to be included - in YOUR narrow idea of queerness - YOU ARE THE PROBLEM.

Flag discourse and pronoun discourse and identity discourse other whiny little assholes complaining about this and that. None. Of. It. MATTERS. Go to a gay event irl or whatever and *no one is going to give a FUCK.* And if they do, they're not worth your time. I promise ipromiseipromise people irl are open to having actual intellectual conversations about identity and shit and the rhetoric of other queer people just telling you to KYS for using some label or some shit is only because the online world of pointless arguments is bleak and sad and devoid of the connection that actual complex people with feelings and unique experiences exist behind the screen. If you're one of these ignorant people, get better, and if you've ever been on the receiving end of this mind rot, it gets better.

The only way we will ever make a change towards a problem that actually matters, we have to forget the whole "UNITE AGAINST THE CRINGE ONES" narrative and open our eyes and stand together against the real oppressors.

Ridiculing people you hate because they're different will not help and will only hurt yourself in the long run.

[bloggingboutburgers]

I've identified as an allosexual aromantic for the longest time now, but now I feel like I may be asexual or aegosexual. I feel like I'm betraying my aroallo community in a way since we're already super underrepresented to begin with. How do I not feel bad about this?

...OK, I'm just speaking for myself here and I don't represent allosexual aromantic people per se since I'm asexual myself, but I also personally feel that what I'm about to say is sort of an obvious thing...

You don't owe anyone to identify with an orientation for the sake of representation. You're you and what works for you is what matters most. I think anybody could understand that.

Plus, you at least have some experience identifying as an allosexual aromantic, which personally makes me feel liek there's nothing stopping you from speaking up about the fact that it's an identity that exists, and remain a strong ally with the experience you have.

I don't know. I might be projecting since I'm an aromantic asexual who's planning to get married to another asexual; I'm aware on surface value that sort of negates the message that all of us have kept fighting so hard for all our lives (you don't NEED marriage to be happy and marriage is a symptom of amatonormativity) but... Also it actually doesn't? And I'm never gonna stop fighting to push that idea, despite my own experience. But because international laws are what they are, marriage is the only way I can be with my queerplatonic partner physically all the time as opposed to just a couple days a year, and I know in my guts that'll make me happy, so I'll go through with it anyway.

I can't help but feel guilty about it sometimes either. But ultimately I know I don't owe anyone anything, and the only thing I owe myself is to defend my own happiness in a way that I feel works for me. I think it oughta be the same for you too.

I know it sounds easier said than done, but I hope it can help you a little bit either way TwT

[jesncin]

I'm not an immigrant to my country. I'm not part of a marginalized race or religion. But even to me it makes so much sense that Clark isn't immediately going around telling anyone just by knowing how quickly people turn and act so cruel for no reason. How horrible behavior doesn't even need an excuse, just a target. How even without the violence, people can grow... strange in ways I don't want to get into.

Of course Clark approached this Lois as he did. Of course Kal told her, this reporter, his name and origins. Of course she reciprocated. A "normal" Lois might not have even if she had something to do it with, but this one has had so many different experiences growing up big and small. Things that I know people would insist can be easily ignored. The put-downs, the look-overs, the snide remarks... Told she's too smart, too "dumb", too "needy", too "pushy", too "weird", too... too... much. Any Lois is brash and unapologetic. But...

Of course Kal-El and Lois Liando are being so understanding where a more "canon" Kal-El and Lois Lane might struggle. What is canon but stories already told and shaped by other times and points of view? This isn't something you have to alter to fit the demands of a boss or publisher, so you're free to let the characters breathe and truly be themselves as they've been cast here. Different but at the heart still who they are. They're able to see and think instead of acting rashly or use words as daggers. Able to be compassionate as much as possible instead of dramatic. To be kind in a cruel world.

I'm sorry that this went on a while but I've rewritten this so many times over the course of a week and this... is as short and as clear as I'm able to get it. I hope you have a good day.

Hi! Yeah I'm glad that even people outside of the experience can understand how Clark's superhero identity is a marginalized one (especially compared to other heroes). When the concept of "foreign"-ness is brought into the equation, people can be cruel. It's why I personally find takes where "people are mad at Clark for ~lying~ about not disclosing his identity" so distasteful.

There we go!! Yeah you get it!! Lois is still a jaded reporter, it's just that her jadedness now comes from a very specific history and experience. Superman still gives her hope, but now it's because she sees herself in his story. Superman still reaches out to Lois to tell his story, but now it's because he knows Lois would do the story justice as an immigrant writer. I was concerned that people would think Superman sharing his Kryptonian name would be "too soon" to do for the Private Interview event, but I'm glad that readers like you understand why he trusts Lois Liando with it. It's common for people of similar experiences/identities to open up to each other sooner than most- because they know that the other person gets it.

:) A thing I've been saying a lot to people lately is "you don't have to work for DC comics to make DC comics". Canon itself can be pretty nebulous, so why can't fanon (where there are no editors and ideally no gatekeepers) be any different? And just because it's fanon, doesn't mean it can't give you the same (if not more) feelings as canon does. It's probably because I rendered the Private Interview comic to a horrifyingly professional degree (lmao I'm putting that comics Masters degree to use) but I've gotten a weird amount of responses that assume my comic needs to justify itself with canon. When no fanon work owes anybody that. I'm glad readers like you get it, y'know!

Oh my, don't apologize for taking the time to write such kind words (for over a week??!)! I really appreciate it, thank you dearly!