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#I mean it's not with the people who care about me
sayruq · 2 days
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Abdul Majeed, struggling to breatheAbdul Majeed al-Sabakhi, 20, lives on an oxygen respirator in the hospital. Speaking is a struggle for the youth who has had cystic fibrosis since childhood. In the first month of Israel’s war on Gaza, the Israeli army bombed the house next door to the al-Sabakhis’ home in the Nuseirat refugee camp in central Gaza. The impact destroyed their home as well. “That day, I was pulled out of under the rubble, nearly suffocated by the toxic smoke and dust,” he recalls. Abdul Majeed spent about a month in intensive care on ventilators, further damaging his lungs to the point where he is now dependent on them. “I lived almost normally before the war. I walked, moved around and attended university without obstacles,” Abdul Majeed says. “But after the war … I became unable to do anything.” Displaced with his parents, four brothers and two sisters to Rafah and then Deir el-Balah, he suffered in the tent and eventually had to be taken to hospital to stay on oxygen. Abdul Majeed was supposed to travel, accompanied by his 21-year-old brother Osama, for urgent lung surgery, but then came news of the Rafah crossing being closed. “Closing the crossing is a death sentence for me and many patients like me,” Abdul Majeed says, gasping for breath as the effort of speaking shakes his frail body. “Every day I am delayed, my chance of survival decreases. “I’ve lost so much weight because my weak lungs mean I can’t even eat.” Osama stays with Abdul Majeed in the hospital, day and night. “Before the war, we used to go out together, stay up late with friends, and have fun. Despite his illness, his condition was stable,” Osama says. “Abdel Majeed’s not just my brother; he’s my companion and friend.”
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rafecameronssl4t · 2 days
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Pretty in Pink || Rafe Cameron x fem!reader
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gif by @rafescurtainbangz
Summary: Just you amused by Rafe and Ward’s phone call.
Warnings: suggestive, reader n rafe smoking, swearing,
Word count: 742
A/n: these canon scenes are so fun to write 😭 lmk if you want more of these <333
MASTERLIST
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Divider by @yoonitos
"That's rough. I mean, yeah, it could've been anyone, right?" Rafe furrowed his eyebrows, trying to appear nonchalant. "Not really, Rafe. It could be one of a very few people," Ward retorted sharply, his frustration palpable even over the phone.
Rafe shrugged, his indifference almost theatrical. "Well, I mean, you know, we were just giving it away anyway. So, who cares?" Ward let out a loud exhale, running a hand down his face. The annoyance in his voice was unmistakable, and Rafe took a perverse satisfaction in knowing he was getting under his father's skin. "Okay, Rafe, okay."
Just then, you stepped outside, your pretty pink tennis set hugging your figure perfectly. A cigarette was cradled between your index and middle fingers, and you brought it to your lips, inhaling deeply. Your eyes locked onto Rafe as you exhaled a plume of smoke, your gaze unwavering.
Rafe grinned, his eyes roaming appreciatively over your body as you sauntered towards the couch. "That's done for now. I need you to finish the list I gave you," Ward continued, his voice a mix of frustration and command.
Rafe pulled the phone away from his ear briefly. "It's Ward," he informed you, sitting down on the couch, as if it wasn’t already obvious from the tone of the conversation. You hummed in acknowledgment, kicking your feet up on his lap. Rafe put the phone on speaker, leaning back as Ward’s voice filled the room.
Rafe glanced at you, a smirk playing on his lips, clearly enjoying the chaos he was stirring. "I want you to sign for the East River property. When that's completed, shut down the offices—" Ward's commanding tone reverberated through the speaker, each word laced with finality.
Rafe rolled his eyes dramatically, a gesture that made you stifle a giggle. "Yeah, no, I—actually, I wanted to talk to you about that. I'm thinking maybe we should keep the offices."
A heavy silence fell, the kind that made every second feel like an eternity. Rafe's eyes stayed on you, watching as you took delicate puffs from your cigarette, the smoke curling elegantly in the air.
"What?" Ward's voice finally cut through the quiet, laden with confusion and annoyance. "Yeah, I'm thinking maybe I should stay down here for a while, really grow the company. I think it'd be good for us, right?" Rafe's tone was casual, almost nonchalant, but you could sense the underlying cunning.
On the other end, you heard Ward groan, a sound full of exasperation, followed by a long, weary exhale. The tension was almost tangible, crackling through the phone. "He's not too happy about it, huh?" you observed, a wry smile playing on your lips. You extended the cigarette toward Rafe, offering it to him. He leaned in, taking a slow, deliberate drag, the tip glowing brightly as he inhaled.
He hummed in response, a low, satisfied sound that matched the glint of amusement in his eyes. As Rafe exhaled a plume of smoke, his gaze never left yours. You could see the thrill in his eyes, the satisfaction he derived from ruffling his father's feathers. "Who is that?" Ward's voice pierced the air, sharp and demanding, as you and Rafe exchanged a glance.
"Hey, Ward!" you greeted him with a saccharine sweetness, your tone a deliberate contrast to the tension that hung in the room. "Rafe, this is supposed to be a private conversation—" "For fuck's sake, Dad, she knows everything already," Rafe interjected, his eyes rolling in exasperation, a gesture that elicited a soft chuckle from you.
Ward's frustration was palpable, his voice tinged with impatience. "Listen to me, Rafe—" Rafe didn't hesitate to cut him off, his tone firm and commanding. "No. No, no, you listen, okay?" His hands moved instinctively to rest on your thighs, his touch both grounding and possessive. You felt a surge of warmth at his touch, a silent reassurance amidst the tension.
"You listening?" Rafe leaned in, his gaze unwavering as he reached to place the phone on the coffee table, his actions deliberate and decisive. "You remember when you told me to make myself useful? Well, that's exactly what I'm doing. I'm making myself useful, alright?" Rafe's gaze on his phone was intense, his voice commanding, as he asserted his authority.
As Rafe continued speaking, outlining his intentions with a firmness that brooked no argument, you decided to get up and fetch the ashtray from the other side of the coffee table. "I can do shit, you know? Explore options, so for the-" As you walked past him, focused on your task, you suddenly felt the sharp sting of Rafe's hand slapping your ass, causing you to yelp in surprise.
"-for the benefit of all, I think I'm gonna hang out for a while, okay?" Rafe's voice carried on, his words interrupted only momentarily by your startled reaction. The mixture of surprise and amusement danced in your eyes as you turned to face him, a playful smirk tugging at the corners of your lips.
"Rafe, listen to me. You are there for one reason and one reason only. You are to act as my proxy to shut down the companies, okay?" Ward's voice had escalated in volume, clearly expressing his displeasure with Rafe's defiance.
"That is our one play. It's—it's our only play. And if you cannot do it—" Ward's words were abruptly cut off by Rafe's interjection, his irritation and anger palpable as he stood up, his movements sharp and agitated. "If I can't do it?" Rafe's voice echoed with incredulity, his frustration bubbling to the surface. "Then what? Then what?" he exclaimed, his tone laced with both sarcasm and defiance.
"You gonna hop on a plane? Come down here, huh?" Rafe paced back and forth on the porch as you watched from the couch, amusement dancing in your eyes. "I mean, it'll be like a goddamn Elvis sighting, Ward fucking Cameron, everyone!" Rafe's voice boomed with exaggerated theatricality, his arms thrown wide in mock grandeur, eliciting a snicker from you.
"Oh my god, he lives! He's back from the dead!" Rafe continued, his words punctuated by his animated gestures as you watched with amusement, thoroughly entertained by your boyfriend's antics. With a scoff, Rafe turned towards you, his expression resolute. "I got the family ring now, Pops. Yeah, I'm wearing it, and it's my time to step up, okay? You're dead." And with that, he abruptly hung up the phone, tossing it onto the couch beside you.
You opened your arms, inviting him in for a hug, and without hesitation, he collapsed onto you, inhaling your signature perfume. Your nails traced soothing patterns on his back as he nestled against you, his frustration still palpable as he muttered against your skin, "God, he's fucking annoying," eliciting a chuckle from you.
Checking your watch, you sighed. "Babe, I gotta go, the girls will be waiting for me," you informed him, attempting to disentangle yourself from his embrace, but he stubbornly refused to budge.
"Where'd you get this set from? This new?" Rafe's fingers toyed with the waistband of your skirt, the fabric teasingly brushing against your skin. "Mhm, you like it?" you teased, a smirk playing on your lips.
"Do I like it? Fuck, of course I like it, baby. You're so pretty in pink," Rafe's gaze lingered appreciatively on your body before meeting your eyes once more. "Tell the girls you'll be a bit late," he murmured, his hands trailing up your skirt teasingly, causing you to playfully throw your head back in feigned annoyance. "Fine," you acquiesced, though the mischievous glint in your eyes betrayed your true feelings.
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box-of-roses · 2 days
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♡.﹀﹀Chapstick﹀﹀.♡
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Characters: Tsukki, Kageyama, Hinata, Makki, Mattsun, Iwaizumi, Sakusa, Atsumu
Warnings: None that I can think of <3
Synopsis: What chapstick I think the different Haikyuu characters would use
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Tsukki
Strawberry
Probably not one to just have chapstick on him at all times so he steals yours
When you first notice he’s been stealing your chapstick you can’t help but smile
Everytime you kiss it tastes like strawberries now because he’s started carrying his own supply of chapstick so you kiss him more often (not that he would admit that)
“Kei, have you seen my chapstick?” You ask as you start looking around the room. You were sure you left it in here. Not on the table, not on the couch…where could it have gone?
“Yeah, I have it right here. You really need to be more careful where you leave your things dummy.” He rolls his eyes and holds out the chapstick to you. You notice a sheen across his lips though and smile a little. 
“Did you use my chapstick?” 
“And if I did? What are you gonna do about it?” You laugh a little and lean into his face. 
“My lips are a little chapped if you don’t mind.” With that you kiss him and while he’s still in shock take your chapstick back. “You know if you wanted to use it you could’ve just asked.”
Kageyama
Milk Tea
He unlike some others on this list would keep chapstick on him
You’re the one who steals his chapstick
He gets the same flavor every time and goes to one specific store because it’s the only one that carries that flavor
“Tobi, take me with you!” You cling to him. He rolls his eyes and shrugs a bit to get you up and walking by yourself. 
“Sure, you can come with me. Maybe you can get some of your own chapstick while you’re at it.” He teases and gives you a smile. You shove him playfully.
“Then where would be my reason to kiss you?”
“Maybe you can just kiss your boyfriend?” He raises an eyebrow at you and opens the door to the store for you. 
“Nah! It’s more fun this way.” 
He gets jealous when you do in fact find a chapstick and stop kissing him when your lips get chapped
He 100% hides the chapstick so you have to come to him again
Hinata
Cake
Another one to steal your chapstick
It was a random one you had in your bag so you just gave it to him from your stash
Definitely only uses cake flavors now because it reminds him of you
Hinata looked around everywhere for the small tube of vanilla cake chapstick you had given him. He was upset that he couldn’t find it. Where was it? He looked everywhere before he gave up. He was sulking on the couch when you returned home. “Y/N, I’m sorry.” He sniffles.
You rush over to him and sit down in front of him. “Oh, Sho, what’s wrong?” You cup his face.
“I lost the chapstick you gave me.” You start laughing. 
“Is that it?” You smile and rummage through your bag before pulling out another chapstick. “I have more, you know.” You hand the chapstick to him. Birthday Cake. 
You noticed he liked the cake flavors so you kept a stash with you at all times incase he happened to lose another one
He found the chapstick he lost the next week, turns out he left it at practice
When you lose your chapstick though he’s there proudly offering the one you gave to him
Makki
Hot Coco
Got it on a whim
Now during Christmas time he stocks up because you told him you liked how his lips tasted once
This doesn’t mean he doesn’t like playing tricks on you though
Remember that trend where people were kissing their partners with lip plumper? Yeah he 100% did that to you
Makki smiled as his plan was coming together. You were going to come home any minute and he was the picture of a doting boyfriend. Sitting on the couch waiting patiently for you to return so you could give him a kiss. 
When you do finally walk through the door you smile and rush to your boyfriend. He’ll never get over how your face lights up when you see him. It’s probably one of his favorite things, that he can make you happy just by being there. You immediately go down to kiss him. After a few minutes though your lips start tingling. Your eyes narrow at him. “Makki. Did you put lip plumper on?”
“Are my kisses that electric to you honey?” He says with a shit eating grin on his face. Well, that answers that question. 
It’s okay though, you get back at him 
You two keep each other on your toes but there’s no denying that when you kiss him and taste hot coco you fall in love all over again
Iwaizumi
Mint
A traditional man
Not against changing flavors if you give it to him though
He always has one on him, a habit he picked up from Oikawa
Definitely teases you though when you first kissed him and recoiled because you weren’t expecting mint
You had finally worked up enough nerve to kiss Iwaizumi. You lean in slowly but once your lips touch you jump back. Your lips tingle and you’re not sure why. Iwaizumi starts laughing though. “My lips are so tingly!” You whisper-yell and put your hand over your mouth. It’s then that you notice the smell of mint. “Hajime! How could you,” you push him back a little. 
“Sorry my love! I didn’t know you would react like that!” This time though you’re prepared when he kisses you again. The tingling of the mint fades away quickly and it’s replaced by the warmth of his lips
As a result his kisses are cold and then warm
You learn to love the cold and find it refreshing, especially if he’s coming back from his morning run and you need a kiss to wake you up
Pair that with his mint toothpaste and you’ve got a recipe to wake you up and get ready for the day
Mattsun
Blueberry Poptart
He tries to find the weirdest flavors he can
He just also really likes the Blueberry Poptart flavor though so it’s the one he always comes back to
It’s a hard flavor to find but he thinks it’s worth it for the smile you make when you notice the flavor
Chapstick game with his collection
Mattsun thought with his collection of wacky flavors it would be fun to play the chapstick game. A good excuse to kiss you as much as he wanted to without any other reason. Of course you agreed so here the two of you were, sitting on your bed with chapstick splayed out on the blanket. 
“So, do you want to go first?” You ask as you look at all the options. Mattsun smiles and nods. 
“Yeah, sure. Close your eyes though. No cheating.” He could care less about if you cheated or not. He just wanted to kiss you for hours. Hence why he brought out his full collection of 60 different flavors. You were going to be here for a while.
It was the chapstick you were wearing on your first date when he kissed you (That’s why he comes back to it) 
You two also definitely play the chapstick game again whenever either of you want to kiss each other without a good reason
Sakusa
Cherry
Another simple man
He just wants his lips to be hydrated
Enjoys your smile when you kiss him and realize it’s cherry though
There’s nothing sentimental about it you just like the taste of cherry chapstick
Your first kiss wasn’t anything spectacular. The both of you were nervous but weren’t sure why. The two of you had kissed other people before so why was it so nerve wracking this time? Sakusa is the one who gets his head together first and cups your face. He pulls down his mask and smiles softly at you. “Are you ready?”
You nod your head with a shaky smile. Both of you lean in and it’s a very nice kiss. It’s gentle and you’re not sure why you were so worried before. The both of you pull away with a smile. “That wasn’t so scary. We were just being silly. Also, the cherry is nice. I like it.” You say and lean back in for another. He lets out a small chuckle and leans back in too. 
Will only try a new chapstick if you’re the one wearing it
If he really wants to try it he’ll give you a quick kiss before standing back up and acting like nothing happened
Atsumu
Fanta
Another weird chapstick connoisseur 
He just really likes Fanta so he keeps some on him wherever he goes
He has at least 6 of them at a time; One in his gym bag, school bag, pants pocket, jacket pocket, one at home on the counter, and one on the bedside table
Also on that enjoys the shocked look on your face
He had only just started carrying around chapstick after he learned your lips could get sunburnt. Needless to say when you kissed him goodbye that morning Fanta was certainly not what you were expecting to taste. He just stands there smirking as you lick your lips confused. “Is that…Fanta? Do you have Fanta chapstick?” 
“Guilty as charged.” He says and leans against the door frame. “Want another one?” You roll your eyes but pull him into another kiss. 
“Not what I was expecting but it’s not bad.” 
Switches it up with other soda flavors
Loves surprising you but that doesn’t mean you can’t surprise him too
You find a Pepper chapstick and rewrap it so it looks like the Fanta one
Payback for all the times he’s pranked you
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I hope you guys enjoyed! Once again an impulse post 💀 let me know if you want a part two with different characters!!! <3
masterlist
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majosullivan · 24 hours
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Nevermore Dashboard Simulator 2
🔄 many-coloured-grass reblogged
🌷 many-coloured-grass Follow
I don’t care what any of you are saying, I just think it is weird that people are joking that Lenore and Annabel are secretly into each other when they have shown constant distant for each other?? Go take a walk through the academy grounds
🔮 sorcery-sorcery-sorcery Follow
the fun police right here is trying to put me in gay detenion but Lenore and Annabel are blocking the way because Lenore has pinned Annabel against the wall
🌷 many-coloured-grass Follow
THE DEVIL HAS A CLAIM ON YOUR SOUL
#WHAT IS YOUR PROBLEM? #THEY CLEARLY HATE EACH OTHER #WHY ARE YOU PEOPLE SAYING STUFF LIKE THIS?
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🎇 labyrinth-of-light Follow
[snapping out of remembering the horrific details about how I slowly suffocated under a black mass of slurry, not knowing if my siblings were alive or not, all because I smelt the scent of coal coming from the fire in the common room] oh I should have been at the club
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⚰️ were-all-dead-here Follow
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🔄 ghostlygal reblogged
🕯️ phantomwraith Follow
i can’t deal with this academy anymore! i mean i can, and i will, obviously. but i can't fucking do this anymore!
🖤 ghostlygal Follow
Area Man Who Has "Had Enough" Wakes Up Next Morning at 7:00 AM to Get Ready to Go to Class Again
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🌤️ serenest-skies Follow
I don’t know if it’s just the stress from the announcement that there’s only one new life, but I SWEAR I just saw Lenore drag Annabel Lee into a closet just now
#or I have started to lose my mind #with how today ended #that seems like a much more reasonable conclusion
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🔄 spookyxskeletons reblogged angelic-oddity
☀️ angelic-oddity Follow
God I wish I was that bell
☀️ angelic-oddity Follow
THIS WAS MEANT TO BE SAVED TO DRAFTS
☀️ angelic-oddity Follow
GUYS PLEASE STOP REBLOGING THIS, ISN’T MY SHAME ENOUGH?
☀️ angelic-oddity Follow
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NO YOU CAN’T DO THIS TO ME
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🔄 fable-silence reblogged
🍁 fable-silence Follow
😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭I HAVETO GO TO CLASS AGAIN😰😰😰😰😰😰😰😰😰😰😰😰😰😰😰😰😰😰
🍁 fable-silence Follow
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my greek chorus ^
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🎊 impishimpulses Follow
My roommate, who just manifested into an six foot tall ochimusha and consistently calls me dearest: All the creatures in this maze seem to desire nothing more than to suck dry any life we have remaining, i just don’t understand this academy
Me [heard “suck dry” and got so hard i got nauseous]: i think i hauve the devil in me
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🔄 ferocious-fiddle reblogged
🧟‍♂️ gutzngore Follow
The Deans are literally Tweedledum & Tweedledee coded because of their sinister symmetry. but whatever
🎻 ferocious-fiddle Follow
OP I know this is a joke, but just remember that if you go knocking on enough doors asking to see the devil, eventually he’ll answer.
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🩸 bloodstained-petals Follow
I’m never going to listen to anyone ever again that tries to give dating advice along the lines of ‘The worse thing that they can say is no :)’, bitch I just witnessed that Ada girl get insulted so throughly in public after she tried to flirt with Prospero that she literally manifested into some screeching rotten hag
#like be real with me right now
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🔄 spookyxskeletons reblogged
🪸 drenchedkelpie Follow
The whole experience with the rats in yesterday’s lesson felt like having to escape a ficious pack of bloodthirsty hunting dogs, and I was but a simple and unexpecting deer
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WHAT THE SHIT
☠️ spookyxskeletons Follow
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🔄 floatinghoax reblogged
🌺 etherealdances Follow
Kill them with kindness? WRONG. Spectre attack 👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻👻
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🔄 deadgirlwalking reblogged namelessghoul
⚙️ the-greater-the-ass Follow
Call me Wall Street the way I. The way I just crashed onto the floor because of that fucking Hungry Ghost
⚙️ the-greater-the-ass Follow
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Have y’all just. Ignored everything that has happened the past few years or are some of you just fucking with me?
🌹 blushedandbloomed Follow
Is this some kind of wide spread prank that people are doing? Me and my roommate were talking about what memories of our family we had recovered and I mentioned how badly my brother was affected by his conscription during the World War II, and my roommate just looked at me like I was speaking another language and asked me what war I was even talking about
⚙️ the-greater-the-ass Follow
I’m sorry, world war number
WHAT?
🃏 demonic-betting Follow
I’M SORRY, WORLD WARS???
🌹 blushedandbloomed Follow
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🪲 goldbug1843 Follow
@blushedandbloomed you cannot just react like that without any explanation about what on earth you meant by World War II
🌹 blushedandbloomed Follow
I MEANT WORLD WAR II, AS IN THE SECOND WORLD WAR, 1ST SEPTEMBER 1939 - 2ND SEPTEMBER 1945. WHY ARE YOU GUYS REACTING LIKE THIS?
🌻 hyacinth-hair Follow
Unless you are the Oracle of Delphi, why the hell are you stating an end date for a war that’s still going on?
🌹 blushedandbloomed Follow
BECAUSE I’M NOT??? WHAT YEAR DO YOU THINK IT IS?
🌻 hyacinth-hair Follow
1942, WHAT YEAR DO YOU THINK IT IS?
🌹 blushedandbloomed Follow
1950. I WOULD LIKE TO THINK I WOULD KNOW THE YEAR THAT I DIED THANK YOU VERY MUCH
⚙️ the-greater-the-ass Follow
IT’S LITERALLY 1934???
🥀 wilted-rose Follow
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🌃 eveningstar Follow
This is getting out of hand
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🪵 premature-burial Follow
I DIED IN 1916, HOW ARE YOU GUYS SAYING THAT YOU WERE ALIVE AROUND TWENTY YEARS AFTER THAT WHEN I DON’T EVEN KNOW IF THE WAR THAT TOOK MY LIFE IS EVEN OVER?
💤 sleepyirene Follow
LOVELY ARE YOU TELLING US THAT YOU DIED DURING WORLD WAR I?
🪵 premature-burial Follow
THAT IS WHAT YOU ALL MEAN BY WORLD WAR I???
🐸 hop-frog Follow
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🌟 celestialwhispers Follow
I must be having some kind of vivid dream because there is no way this is right. In the most recent memories I currently have, the coronation of Edward VII recently occurred, and now I’m seeing people claiming that they died 1910-1950?
🌬️ loss-of-breath Follow
HOLD ON, QUEEN VICTORIA IS DEAD?!
⚙️ the-greater-the-ass Follow
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🌙 voyage-to-the-moon Follow
I am going to lose my marbles
🪓 namelessghoul Follow
WHAT FECKING YEAR IS IT
🪦 deadgirlwalking Follow
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Note
What are your top 5 worst misinterpretations of your posts
saying that I forget other women shave and wear makeup is a disgusting flaunting of my privilege over women who do shave and wear makeup, who are an oppressed class. explaining to 12 year olds that some adults like to dress up for sexy reasons makes me unfit to be around children. every white person is legally required to keep a spreadsheet of all the media they consume to prove it's diverse. I said Taylor Swift was bisexual. when I recommend branching out into fiction for adults I'm shaming adults who read YA novels. I was actually wrong about having a really meaningful relationship with my queer mentor; mentorship isn't real and that was grooming. I was a really promising sex educator up until I refused to stop using the word "queer," which is admittedly less of a misinterpretation of my post and more of an interpretation about my person. saying that I don't care if other people like it when I post about Cats means that I'm a psychopathic bully in need of therapy.
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punkpandapatrixk · 2 days
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🧝🏻‍♀️Mystical Glow-Up Secrets ♦︎ Timeless Pick A Card
Your mystical glow-up is literally divinely ordained, no cap HAHAH I’ve got this vibe from the deck-bottom but let me start with this quote:
'A Humanity that thinks materialistically will produce frightful beings in the future, and a Humanity that thinks spiritual thoughts, will work upon and transform the future organism so that beautiful Human bodies will proceed from it.' – Rudolf Steiner
Oh, gosh.
We are in an era of spiritual consciousness. This is an era where we learn to reflect outwardly what it means to be a 5D-Consciousness Being. Living in a 5D consciousness, people naturally feel lighter, freer, younger, prettier, healthier, more fit, more stress-free, more energetic; all because people's whole vibrations are 'triggered' by a more spiritual ae-nergy.
ae is known as chi or prana or orgone in other languages; by synchronizing with your ae, ever so organically your body learns to derive vital energy from a purer source of consciousness—a high vibration of aetheric authenticity—that reflects in the physical world as a glow-up of the highest divine order~♥︎
As your Mind comes into alignment with the ae of your Spirit, so your Body becomes attuned to that Order. The significance of ae will only grow as more people come into a spiritual kind of liberation from the chains of insecurity propagated by the monsters in the media and politics.
No matter what the propaganda of the moment may say and try to do, you could always be the conscious individual that distils information and derives from this process only the essence of what is good for you on a personal level. If you’re happy, satisfied, confident and proud with your intelligent conscious choices, that spark of contentment is what truly makes a person glow from the inside out~★
education: Body Care and Grooming (1948)
technomagy: Facial Symmetry with Muscle Toning (Energetic Programmed Audio) by Sapien Medicine
deck-bottom: XX Judgement Rx, Silver Historian (Polydore Vergil), Priestess of Beauty
[PAC Masterlist] [Part 1] [Part 3]
[Patreon] [Paid Readings]
☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・.
Pile 1 – As You Mend Your Heart, Babe, All of You Gets Beautiful Again
assistance: what is coming is 100000x better than what is gone by doyouflow
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what’s been taken from you? – 9 of Wands
Although this is a 9 of Wands card, I see that the entirety of your Pile is water-based. You’re someone whose heart is very pure and kind, and you’ve sacrificed a lot of yourself for being there for others. I’m hearing: ‘for a pessimist I was pretty optimistic, and I got nothing—NOTHING—but betrayal and abandonment, and I am exhausted.’ Being charitable around the wrong fucker can surely drain our spiritual aenergy!
You’ve been through multiple cycles of ‘exhausting’ friendships with people who couldn’t appreciate you for the delicate human that you are. They only saw you as this fiery, strong, charismatic capable individual who always managed to whip up a positive attitude in any circumstances. It never occurred to them—not that they’d care to wonder anyway—that maybe this time around you’re the one needing a hug.
Nobody cared; and even the ones who pretended to care, only wanted to know what your gloominess was all about. And they went on to talk shit behind your back and had a good laugh about it. ‘MU HA HA HA, turns out Y/N ain’t even that shit! Y/N is pretty pathetic/loser/crazy BU HA HA HA HA!!!’ Funny thing is, you always knew about their shit one way or another and the whole revelation broke your heart to pieces. Multiple times with different people… tsk tsk…
recalling fragments of your beauty – 9 of Cups
Well, now, I can see you’ve lost a lot of these ‘friends’ and worked on yourself to create new neural pathways towards a truer sense of spiritual abundance. I’m sure right now your Life is pretty OK in areas like finance and material security; your job or creative project is going swimmingly; you have a pretty good work-life balance; and for the most part you’re really enjoying the peacefulness of your solitary Life.
But if there’s one thing, I think you haven’t had a really good conversation with someone interesting in a pretty long time. I see that your eyes have not twinkled from being complimented by someone genuinely kind in a really long while. You’ve lost a lot of your affection for people and you’ve lost faith in being energetic and social. People always disappoint in the end because their hearts are ugly and they’re mean to each other. This deep-seated belief has caused your eyes to look dead and droopy.
Have you perhaps noticed that you’ve developed a set of sanpaku eyes? The minimalistic science behind it states that people could develop sanpaku eyes after going through a lot—like a FUCKTON—of heartache and disappointments. I think your case could be dealing with some kind of a ‘betrayal trauma’ or some variety of ‘injustice trauma’. Look ‘em up, babe~ ♥︎
sealing the deal with the Divine Feminine – Knight of Cups
If some years have passed now since the last time you were around your fake friends, or even frenemies, I want you to know that your beauty has not been lost to time or ageing. Nope. Not at all. That’s bullshit. I can see that you’re the type of person who ages very UNNATURALLY. If your natal chart has a lot of Water aenergies or you have strong placements in Water Houses, you’re defo the type of bitch that can TRANSFORM your physical appearance by sheer mood ;D At this point, you can’t even age coz that skin barrier is strong AF LMAO
THAT’S WHY! Your true mystical glow-up secret lies in your mending your pretty Heart~ You’ve never had an ugly Heart, obviously, and still now it’s not ugly or anything; but it’s the way you think about how deserving you are of a friendship or relationship that honours your complex sensitivity that needs to be acknowledged and RECLAIMED. Doesn’t matter how, doesn’t matter when or who’s coming next, I just want you to know that if this reading has popped in to your Life… Your Soulmates are coming to get you, bitch. Pack up and play in the sea! XD
The good times that you’re going to be having with your Soulmates, Soul Tribes, Soul Fam—however you may resonate—are going to refill the stars in your Heart, automatically reflected in your eyes~ ★_★v Hahah I promise you that you’re going to reunite with Souls who are very, very old friends with you. You’re going to live a very happy, passionate Life doing things you like with people you Love… How the hell do you think that’s not gonna heal all of you and make everything about you beautiful again?😉
Originally, you’re a beautiful bitch. And if you’ve also got some Capricorn/Saturn/10th House placements, it’s very likely you’re ageing backwards! What the hell even is that?? \`★_★`/
GODDESS OF BEAUTY🔻💙
beauty on the inside – Green Physician (Paracelsus)
beauty on the outside – Priestess of Inspiration
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Pile 2 – It’s the Passion in Your Heart That Reflects Outwardly Your True Inner Beauty
assistance: I TRUST things aren’t falling apart they are FALLING INTO PLACE by doyouflow
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~wah, girl, you really gotta check out the bonus content for this one XP~
what’s been taken from you? – 5 of Cups Rx
Out of all the Piles, you’re the baddest bitch of them all, do you realise that? You’ve got the most unhinged aenergy about you XD You’re a psycho, you know that? You’re generally thought of as either unpredictable or uncontrollable, but you could also be both, unprovoked LMAO People think you’re a problem child, because you’re so gutsy. I’m literally not getting ANYTHING about what’s been taken from you ^_^; Are you sure you still need this PAC? XD
First of all, you literally exist in your own dimension. That’s why people can’t control you. They can’t tame you. You’re a weirdo, a maniac even, who does things your way, plans things according to your vision, and yours alone, for the most part. People think you’re rather selfish but it’s because you’re a girl, right? If you were a man they’d say you’re DRIVEN. And yes! DRIVE that Bentley, bitch! No, DRIVE that Tesla into OUTER SPACE, bitch! You don’t appreciate people telling you what you CAN’T do!
And you don’t like it when people gaslight you about your confidence just because they’re a little bitch. You love being a Supreme Bitch—you’re a girl on a mission; ain’t nobody got the aenergy to listen to nobody’s guilt-tripping. And in that sense, your spirit and psychology have never really been hit by society. Society has never been able to take away anything from you ♡
recalling fragments of your beauty – XIV Temperance Rx
I see that your Beauty has stayed intact for the majority of your Life. It’s not like you’d resonate with having lost fragments of your beauty to years of depression, malnutrition or anything of the sort? Your mindset has remained strong for the majority of your adult Life. You have a strong mentality and this is reflected well in your physical body. A glow-up is easy, as long as you want it. And for the most part, your glow-up is tightly bound to your sense of purpose.
You’ve always known you’re meant for great things. And from a very young age you already worked on your mentality. You REFUSED to be normal, you refused mediocrity. It wasn’t a walk in the park until you reached your conviction though. Your childhood was rather constrictive, either due to societal expectations…or familial expectations. The adults around you thought you didn’t notice but you saw all of these fences put around you, and they pissed you off. Even your peers couldn’t understand what you wanted to make out of yourself.
So you rebelled from a very young age. You were, yes, THEE problem child, only because the small-minded people around you were a problem to your goals! Such hindrance. And now you’re glowing up and grabbing all the money bags and they jealous? Are you even fucking kidding my butt? Your path towards a total glow-up of your mindset and real life was not always perfect, but what’s perfection? All of the struggles play into creating your lore👑
sealing the deal with the Divine Feminine – 2 of Cups
If you’ve never heard anybody tell you this, allow me to be the first. Your drive, your determination, your ambition and motivation, although these qualities may make you appear like a selfish bitch on the outside, I, ME, MYSELF, understand that you want these things not only for yourself. There are people in this world you want to protect and provide for. Maybe it’s your mother who was abused or left by her deadbeat husband, idk. Maybe it’s a sibling or a pet you want to give the best Life for, idk.
Maybe, you want to achieve success and fame and be seen by the world, because you want to save the world from the malady of its own crazy, idk~ You want to be an example, a healing presence, a voice of reason, a voice for the voiceless, idk? You may look a certain bitchy, scary way on the outside, but your heart is good; it’s PURE GOLD. You live for the betterment of someone else and if that’s not LOVE, what is?
What most people don’t understand about you is how your sparkle of beauty literally comes from this desire to protect and provide for someone other than yourself. You have a lot of Love in your heart, even if you don’t always admit it to yourself. Your entire Life, your glow-up has come from your being DRIVEN. Vroom vroom, MOTHERFUCKER .・°☆~ You leave a trail of stardust for your aenemies ♥︎
GODDESS OF BEAUTY🔻💛
beauty on the inside – Green Alchemist (Nicolas Flamel)
beauty on the outside – Priestess of Patience
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Pile 3 – When Your Existence is Useful to the Healing of Others, Their Love/Gratitude Nurtures You Back to Health
assistance: you get to be universes favorite by doyouflow
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what’s been taken from you? – Page of Cups Rx
See, it’s crazy that literally a few mins before starting on you, Pile 3, I came across a quote that says this:
‘Some of us are such advanced Souls that we did not come here to be supported, but we came to be the support system for many. If you’ve had a challenging Life and feel you never had proper support or Love, that is because YOU are the Love and Support.’
Well, my heart broke, but…hey, there’s clarity and validation there😊
All of these cards are in reverse, telling me there’s a lot that’s been taken from you. Your heart, compassion, resources, money, hobby items, OMG, the list is endless! So much has been taken away from you. Either by people borrowing stuff without remembering to return or people getting a favour without returning it to you. At least, even when it seemed like they did return some favour to you…the return was either lacklustre or just…it didn’t feel right?
You’ve felt gaslit too much your entire Life. An incessant feeling of being unseen, unappreciated, unloved, could’ve eaten away at your self-worth. You’ve often been the miracle in someone else’s Life, but when it comes to you needing a transformation in your Life, where’s MY miracle…? I think you could have Chiron in 12th House or Pisces? That kind of placement is one where an individual constantly feels like they’ve been forsaken by God, or the positive forces of the Universe…
recalling fragments of your beauty – 3 of Pentacles Rx
The truth of the matter is, you’ve not been forsaken by your Spirit Guides. See, this message is gonna be especially resonant for you who do have Chiron or Saturn in the 8th or 12th House—that the Universe, your Higher Self and Spirit Guides have given you so little guidance and support, because you’re meant to learn how it feels like to be in the shoes of Humans. See, it’s not to say these Humans do not have support—babe, they CAN’T access the support because they’re BLIND and DEAF AS FUCK.
Humans are so embarrassingly divorced from their own intuition. Even the most religious folks are blind and deaf to actual angelic whispers. In many cases, because their false religions have taught them to worship wrongly and be obedient to evil authority and not question any injustice and wrongdoings. The more blindly religious a person is, the more separated they are from their own Humanity, because now their ears are deaf to empathy.
You came into this world to understand the twists and turns of how it feels like to navigate this crazy Matrix with so little guidance, so that one day, when you’re propelled into your main mission, you can remind and even teach people how to re-connect with Love—the true source of all compassion and Divinity in Human Form. When you remind people of their Humanity, you regain, and grow exponentially in Beauty ♥︎
sealing the deal with the Divine Feminine – 6 of Pentacles Rx
So, as you can see, you have a very important spiritual mission in this incarnation. I do not give a goddamn dime what you think you look like; whether or not you‘re conventionally attractive; whether or not you fit some bullshit beauty standards; YOU ARE FUCKING BEAUTIFUL when you’re seen sharing your healing gifts with the world! You do remember that a lot of historians say Cleopatra wasn’t perceived as necessarily that conventionally beautiful by most people, right? But that everybody was charmed by her intelligence and charisma when talking about politics?
Yeah, you give me that vibe, bitch <3 That the essence of what you do to alleviate sorrow in the world, when seen by others, when people listen to what you say, when what you do or write changes people’s lives for the better, when people feel motivated by your sheer aenergy to improve themselves—it’s that kinda shit what will help you regain your natural beauty, or manifest a glow-up ☆
When you engage in your Life’s main mission, it’s people’s Love for what you do and the Gratitude they feel for what it’s done in their lives what will aenergetically nurture you back to health. In a nutshell, people’s appreciation for your Life’s Work IS your support system in this world—later on in Life maybe if you haven’t started. It is your Purpose to be useful to the healing of others~ You’re defo gonna have an audience \^_^v Namaste, bitches~★ I honour all that you’ve been through and all that you’re going to do for this world~ You’re so LOVED!!! <3
GODDESS OF BEAUTY🔻🧡
beauty on the inside – Gold Historian (Raphael Holinshed)
beauty on the outside – Priestess of Love
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[PAC Masterlist] [Part 1] [Part 3]
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iholdwhatican · 12 hours
Text
tension
part two to reunions - must read part 1 first!
pairing: art donaldson x reader x patrick zweig
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length: 3.2k
author's note: this took wayyyy too long for me to do yall, i'm so sorry. these two have a tight hold on me and i'm in the trenches. i've got some good stuff lined up tho, and i'm super excited to write it heeheehee :) also smut in the future will be much longer and much more detailed, just fyi
tags: y/n is art donaldson's wife ; birthday party ; art is down bad ; patrick wants y/n ; possessive!art ; the boys are fighting ; no use of y/n ; pining ; sexual tension ; sugar mommy y/n? ; unapologetic flirting with your bff's wife at his birthday party
warnings: sexual content, p in v, not super detailed but still there!
summary: the stressful night of the birthday party continues, and you find yourself pinging between art and patrick like a tennis ball. how the hell did you get yourself into this?
originally posted by iholdwhatican
It took four minutes and 36 seconds of Art and Patrick being alone outside before the anxiety became too much. Your dress was too tight against your skin and the chatter of the guests rattled in your skull. Your mind replayed the anger on Art’s face over and over, convinced that he’d direct it at you the moment he came back in. And if you were being honest, you couldn’t stop thinking about that kiss. 
Your blood boiled with the ferocity of it, and an ache in your core begged for another taste. 
Another three minutes and 18 seconds passed while you downed half of your second glass of wine. You made conversation with a few people who caught your eye, making sure all the food and drink were up to par. Not that you really could care about that right now. Your mind was a jumble of thoughts about the two men on the balcony. 
Art, Patrick, Art, Patrick, Art, Patrick, Art, Patrick
“You look like you’re gonna puke.” 
For the second time that night, Patrick Zweig’s voice made you jump. 
You looked at him, catching sight of that damned smirk that made your stomach flip, and furrowed your brows. One quick scan of the room came up empty for your husband, forcing the anxiety in your chest to worsen. 
“Where’s Art?” You asked, not missing the way your voice wobbled slightly. 
“Relax.” Patrick responded, resting a hand on your shoulder, “He went to the kitchen, I think. I didn’t kill him. And he didn’t run for the hills either.” 
You decided not to comment on how easily he’d read your worries without you saying anything. For some reason, you were an open book to him. 
A deep sigh left you. You licked your lips anxiously- which immediately caused Patrick’s eyes to fall on your mouth. 
“What happened out there?” 
The man gave you a shrug, letting his hand fall back to his side, “Nothing, really. We just talked for a bit. He told me I could stay, as long as I stopped flirting with you.” 
“So does that mean you’re going to stop?” The idea made you slightly unhappy, which in turn filled you with guilt. Why were you so excited by his flirtations when you had a wonderful, loving husband who treated you like a queen? 
But then Patrick grinned, and you knew the answer before he said it, “Well, I’ve never been one to do what I’m told.” 
A smile grew over your lips, and you tried to hide it with an eye roll, “Why don’t you mingle? Try some food. I’m going to find my husband.” 
He didn’t miss the enunciation you put on ‘my husband’, and you didn’t miss the way his eyes darkened as you said it. You didn’t give it time to linger, instead turning away and moving towards the kitchen. 
You knew the look Patrick had in his eyes. You’d seen it a dozen times in Art’s. On the court, over a board game, in all sorts of scenarios. And every time, even now, the look sent a chill down your spine. 
That expression was clear, resolute competition. 
Just as Patrick had said, you found Art in the kitchen. With his back to you, you had a perfect view of his tense shoulders and hanging head as he poured himself a glass of water. He was all wound up, and you knew it was your fault. Now it was your responsibility to fix it. 
You stepped up behind him, sliding a hand between his shoulder blades. He didn’t hesitate to lean into the touch, a subconscious reaction. He knew it was you just by the feel of your hand on him. And, even if he might be furious, he still found comfort in it. 
“Hey…” You breathed, leaning to the side to meet his gaze. Art looked at you over his shoulder, a half-smile quirking his lips up, “How are you doing?” 
“Hey.” He responded, turning and sliding his hands over your hips. Your chest pressed against his as he leaned down and placed a kiss on your hairline. Then he just lingered there, breathing in your smell, “I honestly don’t know. I just- it was so weird to see him.” 
“Yeah, of course it was.” Your words reached him in a soft, comforting tone. The guilt of putting your perfect, doting husband in this situation was enough to make you feel like you had barbed wire around your neck. You had to pay penance- somehow. You rubbed your hand in circles over his back, “I’m sorry, sundrop. I don’t know what I was thinking when I invited him.” 
Sundrop. A nickname that went way back to the early days of your relationship. Art was an energetic puppy dog with a halo of golden curls and a smile that made your insides feel hot. He was what you pictured a personification of the sun to be, hence the pet name. He pretended not to like it, but his eyes always sparkled a certain way when you said it. 
Art pulled his head away to peer down into your eyes, his own pensive and confused, “No, baby, don’t be sorry. It was a great fucking surprise. Just… a surprise.” 
You shook your head. He was so fucking good to you, “You’re allowed to be mad at me.” 
“Mad? At you?” In one quick motion, he picked you up and set you on the counter. Your legs opened for him without hesitation, allowing him to slot right in between them, “I don’t think that’s possible.”
You fought the blush rising in your cheeks and rolled your eyes, “You think too highly of me.” 
“No. Never.” He replied instantly. He kissed your chin. Then your jaw. Then your neck. Then down your throat, “As far as I’m concerned, you’re God.” 
“Art-” You argued, though you weren’t sure what for. You tilted your neck back and offered yourself up to him. 
“I could spend my life on my knees for you and be happy.” His words were muffled as he mouthed at your neck, sending shivers down your spine. This, combined with the kiss from earlier, was making you ache with need. You were half-tempted to end the party early and take your pretty husband to bed. 
You bit your lip when he ran his tongue over a sensitive spot above your collarbone. If he wasn’t in between them, you’d be squeezing your thighs together. 
When Art pulled away, his eyes had darkened. Dilated pupils and heavy breaths told you all you needed to know. He was just as fucking horny as you were right now. His hands held your hips tighter. 
“Do you think we’d be left alone long enough for me to show you how much I mean it?” He asked. It was almost as if he were begging. As if he couldn’t bear the idea of doing anything other than dropping to his knees and devouring you. 
And God, when he looked at you like that, you had no choice but to say yes. 
Unfortunately, fate intervened, and you were kept from making a scene at your husband’s birthday party. 
“Hey, you two, quit snogging and come entertain us!” One of Art’s tennis friends called, sticking their head into the kitchen. The big grin on their face told you it was just teasing, but you still felt your face burning with embarrassment. 
“It’s my birthday, let me do what I want.” Art jeered right back, lifting you off the counter and back onto your own two feet. You laughed airily at the comment, feeling more light-headed than anything. 
Before following his friend back into the action, he whispered a quick, “Later, okay?” to you. And then he left you standing in the kitchen- touch-starved, foggy-headed, and excruciatingly aroused. 
It was then that you realized you didn’t even get to ask him what happened with Patrick.
Upon re-entering the party, you found yourself taking note of two things- or rather, two people. One, Art- conversing with some friends from the foundation with a big grin on his face. Two, Patrick- having his fill of finger foods from the refreshment table. He was alone. And though you tried to fight it, you found yourself gravitating towards him. 
“Do they not have food where you’re from?” You teased, falling into place at his side. Your gaze slid over the spread before flicking up to his face. 
You’d caught him mid-bite, and he attempted to swallow quickly and regain his composure. Something warmed slightly in your chest. Endearing. 
“Well, I’m kinda… in between places right now.” He explained, tongue stuck in his cheek to clear out residual bits of food, “And there’s never stuff as good as this.” 
You let the compliment slide away, instead focusing on his more troubling response, “Are you homeless?” 
“What? No.” He chuckled, as if the question were preposterous, “I go all over for tennis. It’s just easier to stay on the move.” 
You raised an eyebrow, “And on off-season?” 
Something in his expression darkened, only for a moment, and then he was back to cocky smiles and overwhelming confidence, “I’m too busy to care about that. And what’s it matter to you, anyway?” 
“I’d like to think I’m a good person.” You said, plucking a snack off the table and popping it into your mouth. You chewed it halfway before continuing, “And a good person worries if they think someone they care about isn’t doing well.” 
Patrick grinned at you for five long seconds. And it took him actually saying the words to realize where you’d slipped up. 
“You care about me?” 
Shit. You had not meant to say that. Why was this man so damn good at getting every little thought in your head to spill out of your mouth? 
“If caring about you means I don’t want you sleeping under a bridge somewhere, then sure.” 
“Okay, I would never let it get that far-” 
“I wanna help.” 
He blinked, “Help how?” Briefly, very briefly, you thought of your bed. Your comfortable, spacious bed, perfect for three individuals. You could picture it- you, safe and sound and nestled between the two men. Art, your lovely, obedient husband on one side, letting himself love and be loved. And Patrick on the other side, nice and cozy with a roof over his head and a full belly. 
The image flashed in an instant, and you were left with hollow, heavy guilt. You swallowed. 
“How much do you need?” 
“Huh?” You rolled your eyes at him, “How much money do you need? To keep you afloat for the next little while. And I’ll send you home tonight with leftovers.” 
Patrick let the words wash over him, slowly smiling as they did. He took a step towards you, close enough that one tiny shove would have your bodies pressed together. You could smell him, all sweat and cigarettes and woodsy cologne that made your head spin. You’d been wound up all night, and this was absolutely not helping. 
“You gonna write me a check? Use your hard-earned money to get a practical stranger a hotel for a couple nights?” He murmured, heavy on the charm, “What would your husband think?” 
He knew he’d gotten under your skin. He knew what he was doing. He was fucking enjoying this. 
You tried to hold your ground, looking up at him through your lashes, “It’s his money, actually. He makes sure I never have to work unless I want to.” 
“Guess he treats you pretty well. And look how you’re taking advantage of it.” His hand lay on the table next to yours, his fingertips nearly brushing the skin of your wrist. How bad would it be if you closed the gap? 
You bit your lip, “You’re allowed to turn me down.” 
“I don’t think I’d ever turn you down, Mrs. Donaldson.” 
Something about that title, something about the way he said it, made your blood run hot and cold at the same time. It reminded you of the myths of sirens. Beautiful monsters of the sea that used their voices to bring others to their demise. Talking to Patrick had that same type of allure, and the sense of danger. 
“Then tell me what you need.” 
“What do you think I need?” 
Oh, you could think of a few things. But you could also feel a pair of eyes on you, and you knew exactly who they belonged to. Part of you wanted to tempt him, see if you could get another reaction like out on the balcony. However, you quickly shot the idea down. Not right now, not in the middle of a crowded party.
Lips curving into an innocent smile, you pushed yourself a step back from him, “I think you need a nice place to sleep. And a few good meals. And maybe a hug.” 
The sudden switch-up took Patrick by surprise, but he handled it smoothly and responded only a beat later, “You’re offering?” 
“At least for the first two.” You didn’t know what you’d do if you were in his arms. With the way you were feeling now, with two glasses of wine in your system, your boundaries were getting blurrier and blurrier. How humiliating. 
His bottom lip jutted out into a pout. Which unfortunately dragged your gaze right down to his mouth. It took you a moment too long to meet his eyes again. 
“What, we can’t hug? Don’t you consider me a friend?” 
“I do.” You shrugged, tucking loose hair behind your ear, “Maybe I’m just not a touchy person.” 
A lie. You knew it, and you could tell by the look on his face that he knew it too.
“Yeah.” He smirked, sounding the opposite of sincere, “Art’s wife isn’t a touchy person. Sure.” 
You needed a cold shower. Or to go have some one-on-one time with your vibrator. Or maybe move to the seaside and spend your days going mad in a lighthouse. You weren’t sure. All you knew was how increasingly hot you were feeling. 
“Speaking of Art, go talk to him. Try to make amends. Meet some of his friends.” You suggested, glancing over at your husband. He wasn’t watching you anymore, at least not straight on. But he had a radar when it came to you, and he was very diligent in keeping tabs. No matter what.
“You trying to get rid of me?” Patrick asked lightly. No heat behind the words. 
“Oh, yes.” You admitted, placing your hands on his shoulders and pointing him towards Art, “Find me again before you leave and I’ll have your check.” 
“Yes, ma’am.” He grinned at you over his shoulder, sending a wink before sauntering off. 
Finally, you felt like you could actually get a breath in your lungs. 
The party had ended. Guests went home, Patrick got his check and headed to a hotel you recommended, and you and your partner left all the cleanup for the morning. You barely gave it a second glance as you went up to bed with him, your hand held tightly in his. 
Art fucked you like a starving man that night. You barely got into the room before his lips were plastered on your skin, his hands unzipping your dress with quick precision. He was usually much more reserved, but something about tonight had made him ravenous. And he wasn’t the only one.
You ended up on his lap; bare chests pressed together, skin sweaty and breaths heavy as you rolled your hips into him. His hands clutched your thighs, keeping you close, fingers pressing into the flesh. You pulled on his hair and his head immediately fell back. As if he were a puppet for you to position and use however you wanted. His eyes looked up at you with a fire in them you’d never seen before, but the adoration, the reverence, was all too familiar. 
Your name fell from his lips over and over again like a prayer. The single word weaved with threads of devotion, possessiveness, desire. A song joined in chorus by whatever nonsensical phrase entered his head. I love you, so perfect, all mine, please, please, please. 
He was claiming you. Marking his territory in his own special way. It didn’t matter that Patrick wasn’t here to see it, or that he probably would never even know. As long as Art could tell himself that you were his, he’d be okay. Jealousy was a good look on him. 
You could feel your core tighten with each and every movement of his hips against you. You weren’t going to last much longer. But by the look in your husband’s eyes, neither was he. 
Parted lips claimed yours in a messy kiss, tongue sliding into your mouth and exploring every open space. Then you were being flipped over; back pressed into the mattress as Art rocked into you with reckless abandon. He intertwined his fingers with yours and pinned your hands above your head without ever breaking the kiss. 
You lasted about thirty seconds. Finally, the tension in you snapped and your orgasm washed over you in waves, leaving you limp and trembling. Art finished only a moment later. You could feel him pulsing inside of you as the aftershocks slowly faded away. The room reeked of sweat and sex and your head was spinning. 
Art, your precious, dutiful man, rested his head on your chest as he attempted to catch his breath. You could feel the tickle of his lips kissing your skin, the soft squeeze of his hands on your hips. You ran a hand through his damp hair, fingers massaging his scalp. 
“I love you.” He murmured against your ribs, right over your thundering heart. He said it like he couldn’t quite believe he was allowed, like he didn’t believe you were here, that you were his. 
Dark hair and cigarette smoke flashed through your mind. Almost-touching hands and paper checks. 
“I love you.” You responded, kissing his hairline, “Happy Birthday, baby.” 
The only response you got was a tired, happy sound and another kiss to your collarbone. A quick adjustment later and the two of you were tucked under the blankets, your head on Art’s chest and his arm around you. Neither of you cared enough to clean yourselves up or to put pajamas on. Art was already softly snoring next to you, and you could feel your eyelids getting heavy.
As you listened to the baddump of his heart, a strange thought flitted through your mind. You’d just had the best sex of your life, and it was because of Patrick. You weren’t the only one who’d been thinking of him while in the throes of passion. The notion made something strange twinge in your gut. 
And then, like he’d somehow read your mind, your phone lit up with a text. 
Patrick Zweig: You free for lunch tomorrow?
***
Taglist: 
@jxssimae
@jackierose902109
@dvrkstxrlightt
@yesimwriting
@1989tvcore 
@kookie29 
@dopeoafslimebanana
@vadergf
@nsyncvinyl 
@ireallydontcareanymorebrooo
@brunettegirl
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agirlwithglam · 3 days
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but honey, what about you?
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you're always there for others. always listening to them about their problems, always trying to help them out, make them feel appreciated and included, but what about you? you, my sweet princess are so gentle and kind to others, are so considerate and uplifting with others, you are perfect, or at least you aim to be. but honey, what about you? you give and give and give so much love and appreciation to people in your life, but yet you dont give it to yourself? what kind of crusty musty dusty behaviour is this? it is not arrogant or rude to love yourself the same way you love others. i promise you, it is not. and if the people around you currently can't understand that, then i promise you that one day you will find someone who will.
but in the meantime, my only request is to treat yourself with the same unlimited love you give others. listen to your own problems, be gentle and kind and patient with yourself, try thinking about yourself for once, ok?
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you, my dear angel, deserve the same treatment as you treat others. but then you find yourself wondering that if thats how it should be... why don't i feel loved and included? because not everyone has the same heart as you sweetheart. not everyone has the same pure intentions and heart as your own beautiful, flawless self.
remember that you are completely perfect, just the way you are. girliepops, you are thee dream girl. are you funny? caring? patient? kind? understanding? inclusive? positive? happy? loving? smart? have a good personality? then girl stop worrying. literally the only thing thats missing is the confidence and self love. you're perfect. not even kidding. stop lying down on a puddle so others don't get wet. thats not your responsibility. let me rephrase that: it is not your responsibility to disrespect or hurt yourself for others. in fact, not only is it not your responsibility, it is something that you absolutely mustn't do. don't laugh at something thats rude to you. don't be desperate in trying to entertain others. you are not on this earth to entertain others, but to entertain yourself.
by all means, love people above and beyond, but that includes you. your love for you must be unlimited. why? because every. single. inch. of you deserves love.
tbh idk how much more i can say this. love yourself. love yourself. love yourself!! please oh for the love of god, believe that you're deserving of a pure kind of love, the way you love others. you're more than deserving! own it! <3
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mysterycitrus · 2 days
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how do you think Cass and Damian would be as Batman and Robin?? that level of trust and commitment... they'll, I think, eventually rock it but I don't think I'd be an easy path.
oh man they’d be SO good imo.
in the rich canon that lives in my brain dick would be the initial batman to damian’s robin because I really think that’s crucial. cass does not have the capacity to handle someone like damian, who is already struggling to adjust to this new moral framework and his place in gotham without his father and hasn’t unpacked his actions while with the league. cass, a deeply empathetic person who sees herself in every killer (and is crushed by guilt) would not be able to help damian early on. both of them only have faith in themselves. damian needs to learn how to trust dick’s direction. cass needs to learn that there is value in her life apart from saving others. would cass be so kind to a child who wasn’t able to immediately discern that killing is wrong? or would she view treating him harshly as self-punishment for what she’s done
so!!!! dick grayson starts as batman and it almost kills him. tim has left, he and babs are on the outs, he’s stuck with damian, etc. damian being the robin of the first robin is really really important. from this, damian learns the value of choosing his own path and understanding his own destiny. he grows to appreciate what robin represents as a partnership, and as a gift dick has given him. that, in turn, shows that he has the power to change himself into something he wants to be.
cass initially self-destructs, gives batgirl to steph, and strikes out on her own. she encounters jason todd, someone else who has been unmade and is now a killer. she fights in a world without bruce. she argues with dick about how to help people, and how it’s better off that she’s on her own. she learns about damians mission for redemption, and understands it is something she, in turn, also deserves. that she deserves grace, and that dick wants to pass the mantle to her
it’s so important to me that dick and cass both experience bruce’s initial growth as batman — dick can help damian the way he wishes bruce had been as a child, and cass is able to learn that caring too much doesn’t mean she should protect herself from caring about others.
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adilynnyuri · 1 day
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✧・*🌷positively overthinking🌐✧・*
(Kinda long vaunt coz I kinda wanna brag bout it)
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🪐◖ Why does EVERYTHING happens like i ever wanted??? It's so tiring for me to handle being a perfectionist!
🪐◗ I am literally so tired from getting compliments from people coz they literally LOVE to brag about how perfect I am!
🪐◖ ANY KINDA perfect opportunities in my life literally CHASE ME and wants me to get spoiled in every aspect possible!
🪐◗ I literally have so many good hearted people by my side ALWAYS who would do ANYTHING FOR ME! AND THEY WILL NEVER LEAVE ME!
🪐◖ Why does my life have to be this perfect??? EVERY SINGLE PERSON who sees me wants to compliment me and spoil me in every way I wanted!
🪐◗ I AM LITERALLY GETTING SO MUCH MONEY FOR NO REASON WHAT?? LIKE PEOPLE LITERALLY GIVE ME MONEY FOR NO REASON. I EASILY GET MONEY WITHOUT EVEN ME ACTUALLY WANTING IT!
🪐◖ WHY does my face and body have to be this perfect??? People can't stop COMPLIMENTING HOW PERFECT I AM! MY BAWDY IS SO CUTE AND HAWT. MY FACE LOOKS LIKE IT WAS SCULPTED BY FINEST ARTISTS.  
🪐◗ WHY do I manifest ANYTHING SO FASTLY?? LIKE HOW?? I MEAN YEAH, I KNOW I AM A MASTER IN MANIFESTING BUT THIS QUICK AND INSTANT??
🪐◖ EVEN I am shocked by seeing how perfect I am in every single aspect! Literally I WIN IN EVERY FUCKING THING??
🪐◗ If winning in every aspect of my life was a crime, then i guess I am criminal then. I CAN'T STOP LOOKING AT MYSELF AS I AM SO PERFECT!
🪐◖ Everything in my life is totally magically perfect. Why? I really don't know! EVERYTHING IN MY LIFE HAS BEEN PERFECT FROM THE START. I AM NOT CAPABLE OF LOSING.
🪐◗ People always think that I am too lucky to be like this. But it's so tough being THE MOST PRETTIEST, THE MOST INTELLIGENT, THE MOST HUMOUROUS, THE MOST CARING PERSON IN THE WHOLE UNIVERSE!  
🪐◖ I have the most perfect health ever!! LITERALLY I NEVER GET SICK AT ANY INSTANCE! I AM SO HEALTHY THAT THE DOCTORS ARE SHOCKED!?
🪐◗ EVERYTHING IN MY LIFE IS PERFECT! NO MATTER WHAT EVERYTHING WORKS OUT IN MY FAVOUR!
With lots of love,
ADILYNN YURI 🤍🌷
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loudstan · 2 days
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(67) Days of Whatever the Fuck that Was (PART 2.)
Summary: Chenle wasn't interested in committed relationships until he met the one. The problem is that now she is the one who doesn't want to commit to him.
Pairing: Werewolf! Chenle x Siren! Female reader
Warnings: OOff where do I start. Things get dubious, and even a bit non-conish sometimes so do not read if that's not something you're into. A lot of mind games, manipulation, gaslighting, and all the red flags you can think of. Y/N is MEAN. Also, this is super long so i had to make two separate posts. Read both if you want to know how it started! SMUT.
(PART 2)
“Why’s Jisung crying?” Kun asked when he saw the youngest member of the pack trying to hide how glossy his eyes were a few days later.
“I’m not,” Jisung replied stubbornly, but the words came out broken.
“He watched (500) Days of Summer,” Renjun deadpanned. 
“You watched–,” Kun burst out laughing. “It’s a romantic comedy! How did you end up crying?”
“It’s not romantic, nor funny,” Jisung disagreed.
Renjun sighed. “He’s worried about Chenle.”
“Oh…” Kun frowned. “Is he still hiding in his room?”
Renjun and Jisung nodded.
Kun sighed and hesitantly walked to Chenle’s room, knocking on the door and letting himself in when he heard a monotonous ‘come in’ from the other side.
“Hey, Lele…,” he greeted awkwardly. “How are you feeling?”
Chenle was sprawling in bed, with dark circles under a pair of eyes stuck to the laptop screen.
“Hm,” he replied, without elaborating.
“What are you up to?” Kun asked casually, walking closer to take a look at the screen. “Oh…You’re watching that movie too…”
Chenle barely nodded. “I’ve watched it  6 times. Each time it becomes more obvious that they would never end up together. Funny, isn’t it?” his dull voice said.
“Lele, I’m so sorry,” Kun said sincerely. Not only for what happened to the younger werewolf,  but also for even mentioning that stupid movie.
“It was gonna happen sooner or later,” Chenle closed his laptop and finally looked at the oldest. “She didn’t want me. Not the way I want her, at least.”
Kun looked at him sadly.
“Maybe I could make my own movie,” Chenle joked unenthusiastically. “The title would be (67) Days of Whatever the Fuck that Was.”
“Is there anything I can do to help?” the older offered.
“Sure, you could convince her to take me back,” Chenle chuckled humorlessly. “Forget it, gege. There’s nothing anyone could do,” he said, before putting his laptop away and pulling the covers all the way up until they covered his head. “Can you close the door when you leave, please?”
“I…sure,” Kun murmured, walking out and closing the door quietly.  He stood in the corridor for an entire minute as he considered his options. “Fuck it,” he murmured, for once not caring about his manners.
He went back to the living room where Jisung and Renjun were waiting expectantly. “Get up, you two,” Kun told them. “We’re going to the bar.”
“Yeosang, I’m fine,” you insisted after he begged you to go rest for the 5th time.
“ You haven’t seen your mate in a week, and you know that can affect your health. You shouldn’t abuse your body.”
“It’s almost time to close. There are like 5 people here. It can’t be that hard, ” you laughed.
“I can handle it for the last half of an hour,” he offered. “You haven’t been looking too good lately–”
“It’s getting better,” you lied before turning to the customer to take his order. “Hi! What can I get you?”
“Three glasses of Eternal Dusk, please,” a handsome man with a charming smile said, handing you his credit card. 
“Right away,” you replied with a smile, scanning the card and handing it back to him before preparing the drinks skillfully and handing them to him.
 He thanked you and took the drinks to the table where his friends were waiting for him. You thought you recognized one of them, but he quickly looked away, suddenly being very interested in the wall behind him. Over the course of the night, they kept stealing glances at you, quickly looking away and talking secretly in their tiny group. Eventually, the same guy who had ordered the drinks earlier approached the bar again.
“Another round?” you offered.
“Uh, actually–” he stopped mid-sentence with a wince and hesitantly grabbed a pendant that was hanging from a chain, tucked under his shirt. He inspected the relic suspiciously like it wasn’t his own.
“Everything okay?” you asked.
He looked at you and then back at the pendant, which he quickly hid back under his shirt. “Y-yeah sorry,” he smiled politely. “I was wondering–... you’re not from around here, are you?”
“No, I–uh, I’m from the Scarlet Islands,” you disclosed. “Why?”
“Figures. Your beauty is…definitely not something you see in this town,” he said cheekily, looking at you like he had found out your biggest secret.
“Are you going to order something or not?” Yeosang interrupted the conversation, standing in between you and the customer. 
The man smiled at Yeosang before shaking his head and waving goodbye. “I think we’re done for tonight,” he said, going to his table and hurrying his friends out of the bar.
“What a creep,” Yeosang said. 
“Y-yeah,” you chuckled nervously and started cleaning up now that the last customers were gone.
“Heeey, Sangie,” Wooyoung greeted cheerfully approaching the bar. “Can I steal Y/N away for a little bit?”
Yeosang glared at Wooyoung suspiciously. 
“It won’t be anything stupid, I promise,” Wooyung said, trying to look as innocent as possible.
“I’ll be okay, Sangie,” you chuckled, walking away with Wooyoung when Yeosang finally nodded hesitantly.
Wooyoung guided you out of the ship, to the dock that connected it to land. It was late at night and the place was deserted. The only sound you could hear was the water splashing the wooden ship and the distant voices of the crew members coming from inside the ship.
When you looked at Wooyoung you were surprised to see him taking his shirt off.
“What are you doing?” you asked, astonished.
“I’m getting undressed,” he said, unbuckling his belt.
“I can see that. Why?”
“We’re going swimming!” he exclaimed, stepping out of his pants to present himself in front of you in his underwear. “Why are you just standing there? Do you need me to take your clothes off for you?” he asked suggestively.
“Woo, it’s late…” you tried to reason.
“I’ll push you. Don’t test me.”
You saw a mischievous glint in his eyes and you couldn’t help but laugh. “Fine, I guess it won’t hurt to swim a little bit,” you said, undressing yourself until you were only wearing your bra and panties. The crew had seen you in a swimming suit before, so this was basically the same. And it was dark, so you weren’t worried about him seeing through the fabric once it got wet
You followed Wooyoung into the water and sighed at the feeling surrounding you.
“Feel good?” Wooyoung asked, apprehensively.
“Really good,” you admitted, surprised. Your body had felt heavy and ached for the last few days, but you were suddenly feeling so relieved.
“Seawater restores sirens’ vitality,” Wooyoung commented, very proud of himself. “I read about it.”
“Aaw, were you worried about me?” you teased.
He splashed water on your face as a response. You gasped and splashed him back, starting a childish battle that ended with him holding you tightly against his own body to prevent your attacks.
You were laughing brightly when you felt the soft presence of his lips on yours. It barely lasted a second, but it made all laughter stop.
Your confused eyes met Wooyoung’s untamed ones. He wasn’t laughing, nor did he seem embarrassed or regretful.
“Did that feel good too?” he asked. His voice was thick with implication.
You stared back at him, speechless.
“Don’t worry, this isn’t a love confession,” he said, gently pushing a strand of wet hair from your face. “This is just me saying that I know you’re going through a hard time, and that your body isn’t taking it well. You’re tired, in pain, and so sensitive…” he trailed off.
You blushed. “Woo–”
“I know it’s someone else that you want,” he continued. “But I can help you forget, even if it’s just for a little bit.”
“You don’t have to–”
“You think I get nothing out of it? You may not know this but I have a thing for sirens. I dated one, actually…but things didn’t end up well. I recently found out through Yeosang that she met someone knew,” he chuckled but his laugh sounded empty, hurt. “I should be happy for her. But I can’t bring myself to. Childish, huh?”
“It was you?!” you asked, astonished. “The friend Yeosang told me about–”
“She’s my ex,” Wooyoung confessed. “Well…if you could call that a relationship. We barely held hands or kissed. She was afraid if we…consummated, she would follow me wherever I went. That was smart of her; following a pirate around isn’t anyone’s dream life.”
“Woo…I’m so sorry,” you whispered sympathetically.
“You’re in no position to be sorry about someone else’s love life,” he laughed, earning a playful punch on the shoulder. “What I’m trying to say here is that none of us is with who we want to be, but we have each other…”
“I don’t know if that’s a good idea…” you hesitated.
“Isn’t it tiring to have to pleasure yourself?” he taunted, caressing your waist with intent and making you shiver, suddenly very aware of the proximity and nakedness of you both. “You can’t let the man you love make you cum, and I couldn’t make the woman I loved cum…” he murmured, moving his hands skillfully to give you goosebumps. “Wouldn’t it be poetic if we cum together?”
“The mental gymnastics to get to that conclusion are out of this world,” you joked.
“Y/N,” he groaned. “We’re both lonely and horny, and we’re stuck in a lifestyle that won’t let us have a stable relationship with anyone outside this damn ship. Is it really that crazy to propose we help each other out?”
You considered it for a second. He was making sense; you couldn’t be with Chenle if you wanted to continue your current lifestyle…but Wooyoung would always be there. 
“Captain said no relationships within crew members,” you murmured, holding onto the last argument against this reckless idea.
“Captain doesn’t need to know,” he assured you, closing the distance between your lips and kissing you. You kissed him back, focusing on Wooyoung and trying to forget all about Chenle. Without knowing that you would see him sooner than expected.
“CHENLE!” Kun yelled, bursting into the depressed wolf’s room and yanking the covers away from his limp body. “YOU STUPID BOY!”
After getting over the initial shock, Chenle gave him an unamused glare. “We already established that. No need to yell,” he murmured, reaching for the cover again.
Kun took the cover from his hand and threw it on the floor. He then unclasped from around his neck a golden chain with a doubloon hanging from it and waved it in front of Chenle’s face. “Do you know what this is?” 
“No,” deadpanned Chenle.
“It’s a siren detector,” he replied proudly.
“Why do you even have one of those?” Chenle asked, still uninterested.
“I got it from my time in the navy, of course. All sailors get one for safety.”
“Pff, you were not in the navy,” Chenle scoffed.
“Yes, I was? I sent you postcards?” Kun reminded him offendedly. “Whatever, that’s not the point. The point is we went to the bar where your mate works—“
“You did WHAT?!” Chenle asked outrageously. 
“We were going to convince her to take you back,” Kun continued.
“Nooo,” Chenle groaned, mortified. “How did you even know which bar it was?”
“Jisung led the way,” Kun informed.
Chenle glared at Jisung who was standing awkwardly next to Renjun.
“Sorry,” Jisung mumbled. “Didn’t want you to be sad…”
Chenle sighed. “You should have asked me— did you steal that glass?”
Jisung looked at the glass he was holding, still half full of alcohol. “We left in a hurry and I kinda panicked.”
“As I was saying,” Kun demanded everyone’s attention. “Whenever I got near your mate the detector started burning my skin. I asked her where she was from and she named an island that is located in the Forbidden Sea, which is where you can find  the biggest population of merpeople.”
Chenle stared at him dumbly.
“You imprinted on a siren!” Kun exclaimed exasperatedly. “Well, probably a half-siren…she seems to be able to spend long periods of time on land.”
“…That’s ridiculous. I would have noticed if my mate had a fishtail.”
“I guess they don’t teach you guys anatomy in school anymore,” Kun said. “That’s a myth. Sirens look like any other human. Some historical jerk assumed they had tails because the lower part of their bodies often remained hidden under the water. They have legs just like us, and they sometimes come to land, but they need sea water to survive. My guess is Y/N gets easy access to the water by traveling with pirates.”
“But… it can’t be…”
“It makes perfect sense,” Renjun interjected. “Sirens are famous for their mind control. Think about it: isn’t it weird that you always agreed to everything she said?”
Again, Chenle glared at Jisung, who must have spilled the beans about that too.
 “I don’t know, man,” he sighed tiredly. “Maybe I’m just a simp.”
“No but—“ Jisung spoke nervously. “That night when you met her you were so out of it. All you kept saying was that you didn’t want to mark her. Isn’t that weird?”
Chenke knitted his brows. It was kind of weird. “Maybe it was the fever.”
“Just try to remember,” Renjun insisted. “Did you ever have any disagreement that ended with you saying something out of character? Something that you didn’t understand why you were saying?”
Chenle froze. Every encounter with you had ended like that. Suddenly it all made sense.
Holy fuck. He had been played.
 He groaned and pulled his hair. “So Y/N is a master manipulator. Why does it matter? She doesn’t want to see me.”
”That’s the weird part,” Kun says hurriedly. “I heard her speaking with the other bartender, saying something about not seeing her mate for a week. Your relationship,” he said that word making air quotes with his hands, “ended a week ago. So that has to be referring to you, right? That means she imprinted on you too. But if that’s really the case then she wouldn’t be able to stand being away from you after you guys slept together,” he ranted nonsensically. 
Chenle wasn’t really following. He was still trying to process that he imprinted on a siren, and now Kun was saying that you probably imprinted on him too. He didn’t even know sirens imprinted.
“Maybe sexual relationships aren’t that important for her,” Renjun said, trying to make sense of the situation. 
“Sex is a sacred ritual between siren mates,” Kun contradicted Renjun’s theory. “When a siren is brought to their climax by the one they imprinted on it’s game over. The bond is sealed for eternity. Seriously, guys, what are they teaching you in school?”
“Not how to mate with sirens, clearly,” Renjun replied sarcastically, making Jisung choke on his drink.
“Orgasms seal the bond…” Chenle mumbled, sitting up as he pieced together everything he heard. “Game over…”
“Exactly,” Kun said, excited that at least one of them was paying attention and learning from him. “But then she probably wasn’t talking about you when she mentioned a mate because she shouldn’t be able to live without you after two months of–” 
“I didn’t make her cum,” Chenle admitted.
The room was silent.
“You mean– last time you were together?” Renjun offered.
“Ever,” Chenle deadpanned.
Jisung gasped. “You never told me that!” he accused.
“Yeah, thank god, or you would have told everyone!” Chenle rolled his eyes.
“I get nervous when interrogated!” Jisung defended himself.
“Chenle!” Kun shrieked. “Are you saying that in two months of being fuckbuddies,” he stressed, “ you didn’t make her cum once?!”
“It wasn’t my fault!” Chenle replied.
“Right,” Renjun said sarcastically.
“She kept telling me that I wasn’t good enough. That I didn’t deserve to touch her!” Chenle huffed, incredulous at what he was learning. “Whenever she was about to cum she would stop me with that sickeningly sweet voice of hers–”
“The siren voice,” Kun nodded, starting to understand what was happening.
“And I would always end up doing as she said and–I don’t know I thought it was like a weird kink of hers, or that I really was that bad in bed,” Chenle groaned. 
“She was stopping you from consummating the bond,” Renjun breathed out, catching up.
“Wait what?” Jisung asked.
“She imprinted on Chenle and she knew if he made her orgasm  she would be bonding with him forever,” Kun explained. “She literally hypnotized him to make sure he never made her cum.”
“That’s a whole new level of commitment issues…” Jisung said incredulously. “And gaslighting,” he added,  not believing that someone would go that far. 
But Chenle didn’t doubt you would do all that and more to get what you wanted. You were literally insane.  
“Fucking bitch,” he grunted, getting out of bed and exiting the room.
“Where are you going?” Jisung asked.
“Where do you think?!” Chenle yelled back.
“That’s a terrible idea,” Renjun warned, running after him, followed by Jisung and Kun.
“You either wait here or you come with, but you’re not stopping me,” Chenle grunted, opening the front door and walking out of the house in his pajamas.
The three werewolves exchanged worried looks before following Chenle to his car. Kun ended up driving because Chenle’s hands were shaking with rage, and the car was barely parked near the port when Chenle sprinted toward the imposing ship. 
The bar was closed, and everyone was probably asleep, but Chenle didn’t give a damn. He was going to wake up the entire town if he had to.
But he didn’t have to, because he heard you.
It was distant and weak. You were giggling and whimpering, and at some point, he even thought he heard his name. But where–?
He almost tripped when he stepped on…pants? And there were other pieces of clothing too– Was that your top?!
“You okay?” asked an unfamiliar male voice.
“F-fine,” you croaked.
“That good, huh?” the stranger asked.
“Shut up,” you replied playfully.
The voices were getting closer and Chenle’s enhanced vision could see you swimming toward the dock…with a man. 
“It must have been good,” the man insisted. “You were so out of it that you called me a totally different name.”
“Woo,” you whined, ashamed. “I’m sorry–” 
He pecked your lips. “It’s fine,” he assured you with a smile, reaching for the wooden surface. “You’ll get it right next time–,” his sentence was interrupted when out of nowhere someone grabbed him and pulled him out of the water aggressively. 
Your eyes widened in fear when you saw Chenle, manhandling Wooyoung with murderous intent. The pirate landed on his back on the dock with a loud thud and winced, but that was only the beginning of the pain Chenle had planned for him. 
“C-chenle!” you shrieked, getting out of the water. “Chenle, stop!”
“I’ll deal with you later,” he growled at you, getting back to beating the shit out of the man who had dared to kiss you.
Desperately, you yelled at him to stop, tried to pull him away from Wooyoung, and finally screamed for help, hoping at least one of your crew members would hear you.
Luckily, Yunho came running out of the ship, closely followed by Mingi, who looked half-asleep. They quickly assessed the situation and charged in to separate the two men. San and Yeosang joined the scene right after, helping Wooyoung get up and trying to get him away from the threat.
“I’ll teach you not to touch what isn’t yours,” Chenle growled, breaking free from Yunho and Mingi’s grasp, but thankfully Kun, Renjun and a terrified Jisung stepped in, not letting him reach the poor man. 
“Leave right now or I’ll call the police,” Seongwha spoke authoritatively, standing between his crew and the werewolves.
“Call the police then!” Chenle challenged petulantly. “See if I care. One of my pack is fucking a police officer so they can’t do shit to us–” he suddenly fell on the floor completely unconscious. Behind him, there was Jongho.
“I hit a pressure point so he’ll be asleep for a bit,” Jongho explained calmly. “Not for long though, so you should get him out of here fast.”
The three werewolves nodded quickly, and mumbled a thousand apologies while they grabbed his unconscious pack member and dragged him away. 
Seungwha quickly instructed the crew to take Wooyoung inside and tend to his wounds before turning to you. “Y/N, Captain wants to see you.”
The crew turned to look at you, failing to mask the fear in their eyes. They knew that if the Captain asked you to go to his cabin, it meant you were in huge trouble.
You lowered your head and nodded obediently, grabbing your clothes and boarding the ship. You quickly dried your body and put on some clothes before walking to the Captain’s cabin with trembling legs.
“Come in,” he said before you could even knock.
The antique door opened with a quiet squeak.
Captain Hongjoong was standing by a small window while playfully tossing his spyglass from one hand to the other.
“Did you ask to see me?” you asked nervously.
“I did,” he hummed calmly. “Had fun with Wooyoung?”
Your blood ran cold. There was no way he could have found out this fast, could he?
He chuckled. “Come here, Y/N.”
You took hesitant steps toward him until you were face to face.
“Look outside” he instructed,positioning so you were looking out the window. “What do you see?”
You saw the dock where the fight had happened and if you moved a bit to the right you could see the exact spot where you and Wooyoung had been fooling around. Could he have seen–?
“Saw it all,” he purred next to your ear, answering your unvoiced question. “Can’t say I’m surprised. If someone was going to break that rule it was Wooyoung.”
“It wasn’t his fault–”
“Please,” Hongjoong laughed, sitting on a chair made out of a barrel. “You want me to believe that Wooyoung wasn’t the one who started this? I know my crew,” he said, gesturing at the chair in front of him for you to take a seat too.
“He was only trying to help,” you explained, sitting down.
“Yeah, because you broke up with rich boy, right? Maybe if you hadn’t used your siren voice on him things wouldn’t have ended like that.”
You gasped in surprise. He knew about that?! 
He gasped too, mocking you. “Told you, Y/N. I know my crew,” he informed you, changing his tone to a more serious one. “Relationships within the crew are a rule that could be bent if necessary… but I strictly forbade you from bewitching people.”
“I–I know…”
“Wooyoung and you hooked up, alright, no problem. You’re both adults. But what you did to that man,” he said pointing at the window, “was take away his autonomy for your benefit.”
You nodded slowly, ashamed. 
“I’ve been waiting to see if you would solve things on your own, but now one of my men is hurt. You did that,” he accused.
You winced. “I understand. I’ll pack my things,” you said.
Hongjoong frowned.“Why would you do that?”
“I broke the rules and I put the crew in danger. So I gotta leave, right?”
“That would be the easy way out,” he said sternly. “You can’t abandon people whenever you fail them.”
“Then what should I do?”
“Apologize.”
“I’m sorry,” you said immediately.
“Not to me. To Chenle Zhong.”
Wow. He even knew his full name.
“I ended things with him,” you explained.
“But did you apologize?”
“He’ll move on and find someone better.”
“Did.you.apologize?”
You sighed in defeat. “...No.”
“Do it,” he commanded. “In person.”
You nodded right when someone knocked on the door softly.
“Come in,” Hongjoong said.
Seongwha walked in. “Wooyoung will be fine. Only a few bruises, but no broken bones.”
“Good,” Hongjoong sighed. “Tell him he’s grounded.”
“Of course,”  Seongwha said, but shot you a worried look. “What about Y/N?”
“She has her own task to complete, isn’t that right?” he said, looking at you solemnly.
And that’s how you found yourself unblocking Chenle and texting him, asking him if you could meet. The message showed as read for hours until he finally replied setting a time and date.
He picked you up like he often did in the past, before shit hit the fan. At first you refused to get in the car.
“I’ll be quick,” you said.
“I won’t,” he countered angrily. “I have a lot to say, and you’re gonna listen. Get in.”
His voice left no room for disobedience, so you nervously got in the car. This time he drove in a totally different direction. 
“Where are we going?” you asked.
He didn’t reply. He remained silent even when the car stopped in front of a huge modern building, taking you into the elevator and, once again, pressing the button to go to the highest floor. 
You were in awe when you entered a place as luxurious as the presidential suite, but more homelike. It was a spacious penthouse, with minimum decoration, like it had been recently purchased, with enormous windows that allowed you to see the ocean.
“I’m listening,” Chenle said dryly, standing in front of the window and watching the striking view.
You stood behind him, taking a deep breath in to brace yourself. “There’s something you must know,” you started saying.
He kept his eyes on the view, waiting for you to continue.
“I’m part siren. Sirens can control people’s minds with their voices…and I did that to you.”
He clenched his jaw but remained silent, 
“Everytime you came too close I made you believe that you didn’t actually want that. I treated you like shit to keep you under control, but the truth was that I was afraid of what would happen if we went further. I’m sorry,” you finally said. 
He turned around, glaring at you. “You’re sorry? Do you think you can use and humiliate someone repeatedly and then just say you’re sorry?”
You shook your head. “I know what I did was awful. That’s why I ended things; so you can forget about me and move on.”
“That’s your way of fixing things?” He laughed humorlessly. “Imagine someone broke your leg and then they put a fucking sticker on it, telling you to forget about it. Can you go run a marathon?”
“...That’s not the same–”
“That’s what it felt like to me,” he insisted. “You broke me every time you told me I didn’t deserve you. Everytime you made me say what we had wasn’t special. You don’t get to step on me like that and then tell me to move on.”
“I’m trying to do what’s right.”
“No. You’re doing what’s easier.” 
“Chenle I–,” you sighed. “I’m leaving in three days. There’s nothing I can do for you at this point.”
He met your gaze with eyes that reflected a storm of emotions. 
“There’s something,” he said firmly. “Kiss me.”
A shiver ran down your spine. There was nothing you would like more than to kiss him. “Wouldn’t that make things worse?” you asked apprehensive.
“The person I imprinted on used me for months and is leaving in 3 days. Things can’t possibly get worse for me,” Chenle deadpanned. He stared at your lips and took one of your hands tenderly. “Can you let me have just one moment with you that feels real? Without the lies and the mind games?”
You breathed out against his lips. “O-okay…”
Chenle’s lips were on yours, slow and hot. You felt like you were floating. It had been so long since the last time you were this close to him, you had forgotten how well his lips fit into yours, how gratifying his body felt against yours, how easily he could turn you on with his fingertips barely grazing your skin.
You couldn’t remember why you turned down his touch in the past when it was clearly what you needed the most–even the body ache you had woken up with was subsiding thanks to his ministrations.
It was the little moan that escaped you what brought you back to reality by the time he had taken your shirt off and was kissing your chest while playing with the strap of your bra.
“Chenle,” you moaned when he unclasped your bra and attached his lips to your tits. “I t-think we should stop now–”
He ignored your concerns, sucking on your nipple languidly. 
“Ooh– Chenle I’m serious,” you started to panic at how dangerously good you were starting to feel. With how sensitive you were since you imprinted on him and how much you had been craving for him it wouldn’t take long for you to climax…and that’s a luxury you couldn’t afford if you were to leave with the crew in a couple of days.
“Don’t be like that,” he cooed, unbuttoning your jeans. “You hardly ever allowed me to touch you during our encounters. You can’t expect me to be satisfied with just a kiss when this could be the last time I see you.”
“T-then how about I make y-you feel good instead?” you offered nervously, trying to pull his hands away from you, but he quickly slapped your hands away.
“I don’t think so. We did things your way many times already. It’s my turn to make you cum,” he declared, pulling your pants down hastily.
“NO! WAIT!” you shrieked, grabbing his hands with all your strength.
Chenle stared into your eyes intently. “There’s that terrified expression again,” he uttered. “It’s almost like you don’t want to cum. But that would be ridiculous, wouldn’t it?” he taunted. “Unless there’s something you aren’t telling me…”
You gulped.You indeed hadn’t told him you imprinted on him and what the consequences of an orgasm would be. “I…I just–That’s n-not why I came here–”
“What’s so terrifying about me making you cum, hmm?” he inquired darkly, like he already knew the answer, cornering you against the window glass. “If you don’t give me a good reason I won’t stop.”
You couldn’t tell him, because if you did then you were 100% sure he wouldn’t stop. You didn’t want to do this again, but you didn’t see any other way out right now.
“Pup, listen to me–” you spoke sweetly but he clasped his hand on your mouth firmly.
“No, you won’t,” he spoke through gritted teeth. “You apologize for bewitching me, but you try to do it again the second things don’t go as you planned?” he asked incredulously. 
You squirmed but he didn't budge.
Chenle hummed, placing his free hand on the front of your neck and tracing his fingers over your throat, drawing what felt like random figures. “What a shame. That was your last chance.” 
You gasped for air when he finally uncovered your mouth, but when you tried to speak again no words came out.
You cleared your throat and opened your mouth again, but even though you were saying words, they didn’t materialize into sounds.
You looked at Chenle in shock, and he smirked back at you.
“It’s not nice, huh? Not being able to say what you want,” he asked rhetorically.
‘What did you do?!’ you tried to ask, but of course once again nothing came out of your mouth. 
Chenle understood your voiceless question though and he chuckled. “Here goes my first confession: I found out about what you were a few days ago. I’ve been thinking of ways to stop you from using that voice on me since then. At first I thought about choking you, but I was so fucking mad at you I was afraid I would end up breaking your neck, so I learned how to cast this little spell on your vocal chords.”
Your eyes widened, remembering how you thought that he was just caressing your neck seconds ago.
“I also know you imprinted on me,” he continued speaking, caressing your face. “And I know what will happen if I make you cum so, naturally, I will make it happen.”
Your instinct kicked in and you pushed him, trying to get away as fast as you could, but he quickly caught you and turned you around, pushing you against the window glass with him hugging you from behind. You shivered when the cold material made contact with your bare chest, and the beautiful city view reminded you of how embarrassingly exposed you were.
Chenle’s hand had already found its way into your panties, and he was pleasuring you skillfully and fast, with only one objective in mind.
“Here goes my second confession: I regret not killing that friend of yours,” he whispered next to your ear, while two of his fingers were buried inside of you. “Can’t believe you let him have you like this before me. It drove me mad to find out what you sound like when you’re cumming while in another man’s arms. But what made me even more furious was that you moaned my name. How fucking shameless can you be?”
You wanted to dig a hole and hide in it forever, but first you needed to run away.
He clicked his tongue when you kicked your leg back aimlessly trying to get him off you. “You’re being so rude when I’m making you feel so good you’re dripping down my hand?” He asked, adding a third finger and making you tighten around him.
You shook your head and tried to look at him over your shoulder, giving him your best puppy eyes.
“Do you really want me to stop?” he asked, stilling his fingers inside of you.
You nodded promptly.
He sighed. “I guess I should respect your wishes just like you respected mine–Oh, right,” he pretended to suddenly remember something important. “You didn’t,” he concluded, fucking his fingers into you fast and hard.
You would have screamed if you could. You were so close and it was both marvelous and horrifying. If you gave in it would change your life forever, so you tried to even your breath and will yourself to think of something else.
“Would you look at that?” Chenle taunted. “I can see your ship from here…It’s a shame they’re too far to see how much of an obedient girl you’re being for me, taking my fingers so well, about to give yourself to me completely.”
You did not want anyone to see you like this, but you tried to remind yourself that this penthouse was on the highest floor in an exclusive neighborhood. Surely no one could see you.
“Mm…should I bite you before or after I get you off?” Chenle asked, placing a wet kiss on your neck.
You squirmed helplessly. At this point you knew you wouldn’t break free, and that your efforts were in vain, but you were too stubborn to accept your fate.
“I’m tired of waiting,” he said, abusing that spot that had you rolling your eyes while using his other hand to rub your clit roughly. “Give it to me now.”
Your ears rang and the city lights in front of you became blurry. You felt like the world was spinning around you while the tingly feeling that sometimes you experienced in your fingertips expanded through your body. 
‘Chenle, Chenle, Chenle’ was the only thought in your mind. His firm hands on your body, his warm respiration on your neck, his expensive cologne invading your nostrils, his luscious voice murmuring words you couldn’t comprehend right now–he was everywhere. The feeling was so overwhelming, unlike any orgasm any man had ever given you before. There was no way back now. You were–
“All mine,” Chenle chuckled, removing his hands from your underwear and placing one of them on your throat to remove the spell. “Was that really so bad?” he asked, turning you around to face him.
You glared at him. “Y-you–,” you coughed and spoke shakily, still riding the neverending aftershoks of your orgasm. “Do you k-know what you just d-did?!”
“I’m fully aware,” he replied nonchalantly.
“I won’t be able to leave, you asshole!” you yelled at him as tears started forming in your eyes. “You ruined my life!”
The hand that was on your neck squeezed your throat.
“Like I said, I know what I did. That’s why I did it,” he grunted. “And just for your information, I only reversed the spell to hear you moan. Not for you to get bratty and annoying, so if you try to bewitch me or yell at me one more time you won’t be speaking until the end of my rut.”
You paled. “Y-your rut?!” you choked out.
“Third confession,” Chenle whispered against your lips. “I chose this night to meet because my rut is scheduled to start anytime soon. And you’re gonna help me through it.”
You kicked his leg just out of pettiness. You knew it probably didn’t hurt much and it wouldn’t get you out of this predicament, but you didn’t know how else to voice your anger.
He gave you an unamused look. “That’s it,” he growled, lifting you in his arms and throwing you over his shoulder unceremoniously. You squirmed, kicked, and hit whatever part of him you could reach but it only seemed to add to the punishment that was coming. 
He opened the door to a bedroom, which was also surrounded by wide windows. Like the living room, it wasn’t fully furnished or decorated, but there was a king size bed in the middle and a nightstand, which was all that Chenle needed right now. 
He sat on the bed and manhandled you so you were lying on your belly on his lap, and before you had the chance to ask anything or complain you felt a sharp pain on your ass.
“You’re going to behave,” he guaranteed, landing another slap that made you gasp. “Even if I have to force you to.”
You tried to keep your mouth shut. If he had reversed the spell because he wanted to hear you moan then you wouldn’t give him the satisfaction of hearing a single sound from you.
After spanking you a couple more times he noticed what you were trying to pull.
“Really?” he asked, giving you a particularly hard smack that almost made you give in. “We’ll see about that,” he murmured.
He moved you onto the bed, removed your panties hastily and positioned you so your legs were hanging off the bed while still on your belly. You turned your head around suspiciously but you didn’t see him. You were going to sit up when you felt a pair of firm hands gripping your asscheeks and something warm and wet grazing your inner labia. 
You yelped and Chenle chuckled against your center before diving in.
It had been a long time since someone ate you out from behind; usually you were the one in charge, so being in such a compromising position was humiliating yet he was making you feel so good…
No. You couldn’t let him know you were enjoying this. You bit your lip and grasped onto the bed sheets desperately.
His tongue slid inside of you and he landed another slap on your ass, feeling you clench around the wet muscle. He pulled away for a second to say some cheeky comment, but a malicious kick almost landed on his face.
Furiously, he stood up and climbed on the bed, grabbing you as you were crawling away and forcing you to turn around to face him.
“What the fuck was that?” he growled. 
“Fuck you!” you hissed in response.
“Fucking brat,” he spat, unbuckling his belt and straddling you. “After all you’ve done you think you have the right to be angry?”
“Oh and you’re any better?” you asked indignantly. “You forced an orgasm out of me even though you knew what that implied–”
“Agreed,” he conceded, unbuttoning his pants. “We’re both terrible people and now we’re stuck together, so you might as well get used to it–”
“I may be bonded to you but you don’t own me! I’m sure Yeosang can help me find a way to undo this–Hhmp!” your ranting was interrupted by Chenle grabbing your jaw firmly and  shoving his cock in your mouth, absolutely not in the mood to listen anymore.
“Mm, yeah that’s better,” he hummed, thrusting the head of his cock in and out slowly. “Such a beautiful voice but all that comes out of your mouth is poisonous.”
You tried to complain, but the vibrations only pleased Chenle even more. 
“Yeah, go on, princess,” he encouraged you mockingly, sinking some more of his length into your mouth. 
You shot him a dirty look and hollowed your cheeks to give a hard suck, tasting the salty liquid that the tip oozed.
He moaned and his body bent in pleasure. “Oh yeah?” he sneered, pulling out slightly to thrust back in. “Do your worst, princess, fuck–”
“Hmm,” you moaned around him, stretching your lips and straining your neck to bob your head. 
Chenle felt like his head was spinning. You had pleasured him with your mouth before, but this was different. He had never had so much power over you. It made him feel euphoric. He placed his hands on your head to keep you in place, pulling your hair unintentionally. His mouth hung slack and he fucked your mouth rhythmically.
It took you choking when his cock hit the back of your throat for him to cum in your mouth with a guttural moan, trapping your head between his pelvis and the mattress until you drank every single drop.
With a jaded sigh, he climbed off your chest to start going lower, kissing every corner of your body on the way until he positioned himself with his face between your legs to continue what he had started.
You let out a broken moan when he captured your clit with his mouth and sucked insistently. 
Your legs kicked his back and you pulled his hair angrily but you couldn’t refrain from moaning, much to his delight.  He sucked, and sucked until the stimulation was painful, and almost wished he moved his mouth somewhere else but he was suctioning your clit with obsessive intent, wanting it to feel so good it hurt, wanting to break you.
He alternated between flattening his tongue against you while shaking his head and going back to harsh sucking until your stomach contorts and your mind goes blank, making your legs shake in pleasure.
…Except he doesn’t stop. 
It was the first time he had you cum in his mouth and now he was captivated. He wished you had let him do this sooner. How dare you keep this away from him all this time?! 
“Do it again,” he grumbled against your core  between sloppy licks.
“Are y-haa…are you insane?!” you whined, trying to push him away.
He looked up at you with reddened eyes and growled, slapping your inner thigh.
“I said,” he spoke roughly. “Do it again,” he commanded, getting back to work.
This time he was all over the place, licking and slurping every drop of your release and making you shriek in pleasure and embarrassment. He wouldn’t let any of it go to waste. This belonged to him. You belonged to him. And he would take it as many times as he wanted.
You trembled when he once again focused your clit, like it was his new favorite toy, and circled it with his tongue going clockwise and then counterclockwise, and then flicking it barely with the tip of his tongue.
You whined and the death grip you had on his hair to push him away ended up pushing his head closer to your center.
He moaned appreciatively and let you fuck his face until he heard you gasp brokenly, so he sucked hard, bringing you to yet another orgasm. 
Your body relaxed on the bed while he cleaned you up with his tongue languidly, making you wince and convulse sporadically. 
Once he finally licked all he could find, he climbed back up so he was face to face with you.
“I hate you,” you croaked.
“Yeah?” he purred, kissing you, letting you taste yourself on his lips. “I don’t think you do…And even if you did, that’s too bad, because I’m obsessed with you,” he concluded, diving in for another kiss.
He was right, you didn’t hate him. You were just mad, and scared, but you loved his lips on yours, and the way his body rocked against yours, and his hard cock pushing against your entrance–
“Ah–haaa, fuck–Chenle!” you moaned loudly when he pushed in slowly, stretching you out delightfully. 
He swallowed your moans with his kisses, between hushed praises for taking him so well. 
“My pretty princess…” he breathed out once he bottomed up completely. He grabbed one of your thighs and pushed it up and outwards before rolling his hips experimentally. He starts very slowly, allowing you to feel every vein of his cock dragging against your inner walls and you have no words to describe how good it feels.
His eyes lit up when he hit a spot that made you arch your back, aiming to hit it harder.
“What happened to that fierce attitude?” he teased when you let out a strangled moan.
You only looked at him with wide eyes, grabbing onto his shoulders clumsily without knowing what to do with yourself. Having him inside of you after having consummated the bond made everything feel 10 times more intense. There was nothing you could possibly say to express how good it felt to have your mate’s cock kissing your cervix so divinely. 
“Poor Y/N,” Chenle spoke condescendingly, using his thumb to wipe some drool off the corner of your mouth. “Cock so good you can’t speak?”
You try to think of a comeback. You really do, but how could you when he was filling you all the way up and hitting all the right places–at the same time?
He chuckled darkly, snapping his hips hard once, twice and then building up a steady rhythm that had you screaming like he always wanted you to.
“Oh g-god…” was the first coherent sentence you said, throwing your head back.
 “That’s my princess,” he praised, pressing his face into the crook of your neck. “Submitting for her mate–haa…,” he moaned as he nosed along your neck, looking for the right spot to leave his mark.
“C-chenle–” you whined, feeling yourself getting closer the more his pelvis grinded against your clit.
He sank his teeth into your skin and you felt that white pleasure consume you again, making you cum with a silent scream and your legs shake around Chenle’s waist.
He winced when you contracted around his cock, murmuring nonsense about how tight and perfect you were for him while licking the fresh wound on your neck.
You were shaking like a leaf, whispering his name like it was the only thing you knew and he just didn’t stop.
“Fuck! P-please!” you cried out when he pressed his hips against yours harshly and moved them in a circular way before resuming his unrelenting assault. 
You didn’t think you could take any more so you tried to push him away weakly, but he pinned you down by your wrists. 
Both of you knew you weren’t actually trying to rebel anymore, but his wolf loved to show off his strength, making you submit. He had wanted to dominate you the moment he met you, but his rut had turned that want into a need. 
“C-can’t,” you sobbed, but the more you squirmed, the harder he fucked you.
“You’re g-gonna take it,” he grunted, squeezing your wrists and thrusting fast enough to make you see stars. 
Tears slid down your face but you nodded obediently and that sent Chenle into a frenzy. He let go of your wrists to grab onto your waist, sitting up and ramming into you at a speed he didn’t know he was capable of.
“Aah…Haa, fuck, Y/N–my obedient little mate, yeah…” he moaned.
You whined at the praise, letting him fuck every coherent thought out of your head.
“All you have t-to do is take it,” he spoke with slurred words as he impaled you into his cock like a ragdoll. “Let me have you like this,” he emphasized the last word with a hard thrust. “Let me m-make you feel good mm…”
You nodded dumbly while he pounded you on the bed.
“Look this pretty–oh fuck, so pretty for me,” he sounded strained, and his movements were haltering. “Let me g-give you anything you could…oooh anything y-you could possibly want,” he was getting desperate, feeling his knot starting to form was pushing him over the edge. “L-let me…,” he gulped, forcing his knot into you and making you scream. “Oooh Y/N, fuuuck–”
You couldn’t breathe. It was too much. He was too deep, and he was trying to pull you impossibly closer as his cock throbbed inside of you and he finally came with a shaky sigh, shooting endless spurts of cum inside of you.
Your eyes rolled back as he convulsed on top of you, once again pinning your wrists just for show, to remind you he was in charge.
Once both of you came down from your high, Chenle took in the view and beamed with pride. 
You were sprawled out on your back, with his mark on your neck, fucked dumb, submissive, completely overstimulated, impaled on his cock, and full of what soon would be his pups. 
This was what he would wake up to everyday, in this very apartment he had bought for both of you.
Meanwhile, on the ship, Captain Hongjoong put his spyglass down and walked away from the window, letting out an impressed whistle.
“Seongwha, make preparations for a farewell party,” he requested, sitting on his chair and putting his feet on the table. “Looks like Y/N’s staying in this town.”
“You’re so mean,” Seongwha replied, unimpressed. “You knew this would happen when you sent her to speak with him.”
“She’ll thank me one day,” Hongjoong assured him, winking playfully.
154 notes · View notes
biolumien · 2 days
Text
... carried flower petals
pt 2 to this
notes: I AM. such a bad writer. help. going through double the stages of grief on this one. who even cares. who even gaf! i don't. im winning in the dgaf wars. (lying)
samurai!soshiro hoshina x fem!reader NSFW! w/ m/f sex. no i did not proofread this. this isn't a flex i actively just squinted trying not to look too hard at my own writing. this is also hoshina pov word count: 2415
hoshina supposes that he couldn’t blame you for your reaction. there was no way you would have been happy about marrying him, a complete and utter stranger–no matter how many times you might have met prior. and in the three times you’d met, he’d tried to keep his distance. there was an aura of deep discontent about you, and he didn’t want to disturb you, for fear that your anger would turn darker.
at least, until you pulled a dagger on him.
the dagger that he’d gifted you, no less. 
or, well–he hadn’t gifted it to you directly. he had selected the gift, but it had come alongside the marriage offer–and so hoshina wondered if you’d conflated the dagger as something utterly negative. when he’d picked out the dagger, he’d vowed it to keep you safe from harm. a selfish well-wishing on his part, sure–as a samurai, he was bound to make enemies that could hurt you.
he raises a hand to his neck, touching where you might have slashed him.
would he have let you? 
he brings himself to his feet as the sliding door to his room opens. you stand in the doorway, dressed in a simple nightgown–a far cry from the garments you wore during the ceremony. 
his mind flits back to them, for a moment–you’d chosen to wear pure white, contrasting him in his black haori and hakama. your expression had been severe, distant even then. you’d followed your new attendants into the quarters of your new housing within the hoshina clan’s home to change out of your wedding attire, and you hadn’t met his glance once.
you bow your head.
“your attendants tell me you’re quite the talent in bed,” you say, your voice crisp. your eyes meet his, your gaze unreadable. his eyes flick to your hands, folded neatly in front of you–and yet your fingers are fidgeting ever so slightly, a possible indication of just how nervous you were. 
hoshina can’t help but laugh.
“is that what they say? my mother can’t help but find people that run their mouths…” hoshina runs a hand through his hair. “sit. i can’t have my wife–” the word still felt foreign to him–wife, he was really a husband, was that even a moniker that fit him?–but he swallows his misgivings, pats one of the cushions next to the futon. “–standing for so long. it would be unfitting.”
“so are you?” you gather your kimono, sitting down. 
hoshina hums.
“if i tell you, would you see me differently?” hoshina asks.
“well. you’re my husband,” you say. the corners of your lips twitch when you say the word husband, your brow furrowing a little bit as you say it. a clear show of your definite displeasure. “i have to… accept it, after all. as your wife. hell, your attendants tell me that you were in the process of courting concu–”
“ahh,” hoshina leans his head back. “so is that what that’s all about?” he sighs, a strange, tightening pressure forming somewhere in his throat. the marriage acceptance hadn’t been on his end. it’d been his father’s, much to his mother’s chagrin. you were from a no-name clan, having long lost your family’s relevance. his mother had complained about your family’s name dragging down the hoshina family’s name.
but as hoshina reminisced–he couldn’t give a damn about his family name.
his brother–his proud, arrogant, stubborn, awful brother–had made his opinion on their family name very clear, by just leaving.
hoshina did resent him for it, just a little. it just meant that he couldn’t run away, now. 
“no. the concubine rumor’s bullshit,” hoshina says. “quite honestly, i couldn’t be bothered. i’m not in the interest of producing my family an heir.”
“huh?” you ask, sounding confused. “but–” “i mean. the sex is fine,” hoshina says candidly, placidly. “and if the family gets an heir, we get an heir. but it’s never been my concern. i think you ought not to worry about it, either. our families need each other. it’ll be reason enough for you to stay.” 
you stare at him, perplexed for the moment, before your brow also furrows. 
“so, you… don’t, want—”
“mm. you pulled a knife on me last time we talked,” hoshina teases as he begins to undo his ponytail. “i thought that made your opinion on me fairly clear. i won’t do anything that makes you uncomfortable if you don’t want it. my folks won’t be happy, but there’s nothing like lying that can’t fix that.” he runs a hand through his hair. “so it’s your call.”
you watch him. 
“it’s fine,” you say. you lean in closer to him, and he simply watches you—watches you like he did on the first day the two of you met, watches you like he did when you raised the dagger to his throat. always watching, waiting for you to make the first move. 
“i’d rather just get it over with,” you say. “the first time.” 
“mm. as you command, then,” hoshina says. 
when he leans in to kiss you, he does it slowly. you taste faintly of the sake you drank during the marriage ceremony, though the alcohol has long worn off. 
he wishes he could take you apart more cleanly. to take you apart with intention. he can draw the lines from the veins in your wrist to the beating, fluttering of your heart in your breast. you kiss him with your eyes open, as if you’re watching for his every movement. he supposes that he’s watching you, too, trying to see what you’ll do. what you like. 
“are you just going to kiss me?” you murmur, something like spite in your voice. “or are you actually going to show me something interesting?” 
“interesting?” he pulls back from the kiss, raising an eyebrow. 
“i’ve read all the woodcuts,” you say. “as apparently was my duty as your wife. i was just wondering if there was anything more interesting than that.” 
“mm. you can’t possibly learn what it feels like through reading alone,” hoshina says. “experience is the best teacher.”
“big talk,” you retort. hoshina almost hates the way his heart flutters at your words, entranced by you. one hand reaches out to touch your face, the other hand gently reaching down to undo your obi as he pulls you closer to him, letting you straddle his lap. 
“i’m afraid most of my lovers say i’m a talkative one,” hoshina purrs. “but i hope you’ll find me satisfactory.” when he leans in to kiss you again, your sash falls gently onto the ground, and the inner layers of your kimono come undone.  
he’s had no small share of lovers—or, well, general brothel experience, he supposes. he’s a man in the end—a samurai from a family of renown, for whom many lovers might have found him appealing simply for how much money he was willing to pay for good service. but he knows what he’s doing, in any case.
he revels in it, though—at how responsive and jittery you seem to be. the faintest touch of his hand against your skin is enough to make you jolt out of your skin, and you whimper ever so slightly as his fingers pull at a nipple, and he feels your pulse jump in your throat as his teeth graze at your neck. he feels you shift against him, attempt to press your thighs together and he laughs. 
he’s surprised there, too—the way you shudder when he laughs, as he’s pressed against you. 
when his fingers seek between your legs, he’s thrilled, but still surprised to find the telltale sign of slick. 
“mm. this wet already, really?” hoshina teases. his hand brushes against your inner thigh, coaxing you to spread your legs a little more, and he feels your leg twitch against the shift of his knuckles. “you’re desperate.” 
“as if.” your breath sounds shuddery, and hoshina laughs, not meanly. he wonders how he could take you apart—could he use just his mouth? his fingers? the mere suggestion of touching you, just using words alone? he wanted to know, desperately so. desperately in the same way he wanted to know your heart, if only you’d let him. but in the meantime, he smiles—and it’s more of a smirk. 
he takes his fingers to his mouth, sucking the wetness from his fingers, and he revels in the way you flush, a half-scandalized and half-flustered sound escaping your mouth. 
“it’s alright,” hoshina says, teasing. 
“i don’t—need you to tell me it’s alright,” you say, flustered. “i just—”
“less talking from you,” hoshina says, fondly. gently. he’s entranced by you, the swell of your breast and the way your skin flushes red from your neck to your collarbones. he wishes he could sink his teeth into your pulse—or would you give him your beating heart, let him devour the tender organ? “you’re doing wonderfully. do you feel up for more?” 
you pause, biting your lip. he marvels at the way your fingers twitch against his in anticipation, and your brow furrows. 
“let—i want to be on top,” you say, and hoshina simply smiles. 
“alright,” he acquiesces. “i’m all yours.”
that much was true. he was learning far too quickly that he was very much a man that would follow you anywhere, that he was at your beck and call. 
you help him undress with shaking hands, pulling his belt away and pushing the kimono from his shoulders. your hands stop for a moment as you survey his chest—hoshina watches your face, propped back and leaning back on his hands. your fingers press against a deep scar against his chest, and your eyes meet his. 
“long story,” hoshina says softly. “not the kind i’d tell my wife on our first night together, anyhow.” 
your hand gently touches his cock and he hisses, practically, wincing at how it feels like too much and not much at all. it takes most of his discipline to not rut up into the touch, to let himself be taken by that pleasure. you gently push him back, letting him lie back against the futon. 
as you lower yourself slowly onto his cock, hoshina watches as your fingers flex against his chest, your eyes squeeze and your toes desperately curl. he shifts his hips a little bit, and you whimper. 
“don’t tease,” you keen. 
“m’not.”
hoshina thinks it’s quite the opposite, really. he’s a patient man, but not this patient. you’re about halfway down his cock at this point, slowly taking him in bit by bit—and then his patience just snaps somehow when he hears you whine again. not in a bad way—just in a he’ll fucking die like this, he’s sure kind of way. 
you gasp immediately as he thrusts up, causing you to bottom out. your hips meet his, and you lean your head back, a loud and desperate moan leaving your lips. 
“y-you awful man,” you moan out, something like a pout in your tone. “i wanted to take my time—”
“mm—hm. sorry,” hoshina teases, not quite apologetic at all. his voice strains a bit—you feel almost like a fire, your cunt desperately squeezing against his cock. “just don’t think i’ll last long with you squeezing me like this. does it feel that good?”
your face flushes, your hair plastered to your forehead. 
“shut up.”
“i’ll take that as a yes, then,” hoshina says, unrepentant in the way he thrusts up into you, reveling in the way you respond to each movement with tiny little whimpers that stretch into longer and longer cries. you don’t say his name, but he finds himself uncaring for the moment. does he wish you’d say his name? does he wish, however selfishly, that this moment might burn itself into your memory?
surely he doesn’t. it would be unbecoming of him to ask that much. 
your hand leans out, digging into his skin, and he lets out a soft, raspy breath, taking your hand into his. 
“‘m close,” you whimper out through shaking breaths, and hoshina’s heart squeezes again, at the way your hips cant against his, as if each touch almost hurts, but you can’t help but continue to press your hips against his, trying to find more traction. hoshina smirks, his free hand reaching out to thumb at your clit, flicking upwards, and tries to see if he can memorize the way you seize up against him, the way you squeeze down on his cock–tries to see if he can memorize every twitch.
he hopes he can.
you cum soon after, and your hand digs into his so hard that he wonders if you might be able to break his fingers one day–and hopes that you can. he holds you tightly against him, letting you ride out the waves of your orgasm as you whimper tiny uh, uh, uhs–until you wince.
“hurts, i–please,” you say, and hoshina takes pity on you for the moment, pulls out, and strokes soothingly at your face. your chest heaves, and hoshina thinks he could get lost in your every motion. as hoshina shifts to move away–he’d rather prioritize your comfort over his in the end, so despite the fact that he was hard to the point it almost hurt, he figured he’d just deal with it on his own—you shift up.
“but you–you didn’t,” you say after a moment, grabbing his wrist. 
“hm?” hoshina hums. “mm. don’t worry about me, dear. i’m more than capable of–fuck, you–” his voice halts right as your hand wraps around his cock, your thumb grazing over the head of it ever so gently. “fuck. you-you don’t have to–”
“please,” you say, something like disdain–or spite? or something, he really couldn’t tell–in your voice. “i can do this much.”
he cums embarrassingly fast–the mixture of being so strung out at this point, so strangely affected, enamored by you–and he can’t help but laugh. he wants to press his face into your collarbone, but he can’t bring himself to cross the distance. he hums, instead, simply exhaling through his teeth for a moment.
“get some rest,” hoshina says. he watches as your face shifts ever so slightly–and he wishes he knew you better, if only so he could understand what you were thinking.
“alright,” you say.
hoshina fears he’s in love.
but the part of him that knows better says he shouldn’t be. he watches silvery moonlight paint the planes of your back, and you turn away from him, lost in sleep. 
he sighs.
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so-that-was-okay · 3 days
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Tips for younger Bucktommy fic writers who're looking to write an accurate characterization, especially when it comes to Tommy (and this post is also for the people who think everything goes too fast with no build-up between Buck and Tommy):
Dating when you're in your 30s and 40s is very different. When you meet a decent person you're attracted to and with whom things go (very) well the first few times you meet, things can go very fast in a very simple way. You know yourself better and you know others better too. So the dating phase can be very short and things can move on to being a real couple and moving together quite fast (if that's what both want). Also, things go even faster when it comes to queer people. In short: less bullshit, more straight to the point.
Love != passion. Of course, it's a generalization but the "passionate" phase of the relationship doesn't last as long as when you're younger. The passion is still there but it's not burning hot, explosive, in the face of the world, "look at us how we loooooove each other", it's more tender. You can have a passionate relationship but it doesn't show the same way as when you're 20. Passion becomes like a slow cooked dish with rich and deep flavors, instead of the rush of an energy drink and 5 coffees in your 20s. Also, it doesn't mean Buck and Tommy can't fuck nasty.
We care less, about a lot of things. Again, it's a generalization and I'm also writing this with what we know about Tommy and Buck. Unless Tommy is hiding his game very well, his personality is pretty clear to me. Look at the date. It was a failure for Tommy, as a gay man who fought his own demons, and others, for years. Yet, he decided to be kind about it. Because in the end, it's not the end of the world. It hurts, sure, but that wouldn't be the first time and he didn't make it only about him. It was also about Buck not being ready. The coffee date was also a good scene. Tommy is almost nonchalant, open. I'm borrowing Ryan's words when he said "whatever happens happens". Tommy went through enough shit to not give this situation the drama that can be easily avoided. And it paid off.
Pouting, sulking, active display of real jealousy, acting like a child (and I insist on the "like a child" because adult can sulk, obviously) = NOT CUTE. AT ALL. I get that the infantilization of adults is very common in fandoms so younger people can relate, and because fic writers often write older characters with younger people in mind as references. But it's not a thing in real life, and when it happens, it's not "normal behavior". Of course they can sulk and pout, but not the same way as a young person would. It's a lot more subtle. Also, in the case of Tommy, he's been shown being very good at communicating what he wants and doesn't want. Buck will dance around the matter more, his frustration would probably show with him being agitated or anxious, being reckless too, because he's just like that, but not Tommy. Make them talk about their issues, even if they go through a period of frustration and miscommunication. Tommy should be the kind of man who will encourage Buck to grow and be better at sorting and understanding his feelings in a mature way but without treating him as a child.
Again, all this could help for an accurate characterization. Anyone is free to write the characters the way they want, go full OOC if you want, it's your fic. This post is just giving some tips!
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cheriladycl01 · 3 days
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My love, is mine all mine - Max Verstappen x Norris! Reader x Charles Leclerc Part 6
Plot: Norris' Twin sister is also a driver in the 2021 line up and is in her rookie era. Not only do the commentators struggle to now talk about the pair in the race, but they also struggle to talk about talent. What happens when two drivers find her eye-catching.
A/N: I've brought Luisia into things because of the timeline and it being 2021. Don't hate on her, or the fact that i've brought her into my writing please!
Credit to countingstars-17 for the GIF
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After the shit show of a party, you woke up earlier than everyone else and left the docked boat. You caught the earliest flight back to the UK. You were so pissed with your friends and brother that they’d just up and left you in the club.
The whole flight home, you pondered whether you just really needed to grow up about ever situation in your life.
Lando and the clubbing group leaving you? They were drunk and probably saw you with loads of other people and assumed you were safe and good.
Charles admitting his feelings for you? You arguably needed to focus more on your career that you’d worked so hard for, you didn’t have time for boys and if Charlie really did care for you like he said, he would understand.
Max sleeping or dating your best friend? Good for him, he should be happy.
You needed to not be bitter about all of these minor blips in your life and just get on with it.
Little did you know that this would create a version of you so far from her normal bubbly self that even people who hadn’t spoken to you in years would be able to tell something wasn’t right with you.
Max and Charles had both tried to contact you through texts and phone calls all which had been ignored, you knew it was for the best to just let it all go and leave it at a what could have been. You had responsibilities far greater that you needed to focus on.
When it came to after the summer having left your brother and gone travelling on your own, updating your Instagram and family group chat whenever you managed to get wifi, you were back and raring to go for your home race.
Lando had sent a text to the family group chat asking who would be coming. He wanted to invite Luisa and only had two passes to give out. So that would mean one for Luisa and one for his dad.
Lando - Can you give your paddock passes to mum and Flo, Cisca can’t make it because of Uni
Y/N - Kinda awkward i had someone in mind i wanted to bring :(
Lando - come on its mum and your little sister Y/N don’t be rude and give up your pass to some random dude you met in Bali …
You ignored it, before going to McLaren and begging Zac for a spare paddock pass. You gave your original 2 to your mum and Flo, but your next one went to Nathan Bishop, he was a goalkeeper for Manchester United and you’d met him on a trip you’d been doing in Bali and he immediately knew who you were and you guys got talking and one thing led to another and you were inviting each other to your sports.
In the time you’d travelled he’d became a really good friend and you didn’t feel as lonely as you had since starting in F1. It was really refreshing.
You met him before, driving him to the paddock in your McLaren and pulling up into the Silverstone car park together.
“Thanks for the pass, I’ve never been to a race before so this is actually really exciting for me” he smiles waiting as you grab your bag from the back seat.
“Always welcome!” You grinned back.
“Mmmm and I’m excited to see if you are really as good as you say you are!” He teases elbowing you as you swipe your pass through the paddock scanners.
“Hey! I am a good driver! I got you here safely didn’t I?” You smile and he just nods, you point out various bits of the paddock talking about all the hustle and bustle and all the different teams and the workers running around fitting last minute bits to the motorhomes.
“Oh come on! We need to get you some McLaren team merch!” You grin pulling him to the quiet fan zone thanks to the early time it was and going to the merch stool.
“Hiya! Oh Y/N! How are you?” The worker smiles noticing it’s you.
“Hey! I’m really good! How are you? It’s hot today, make sure you drink lots of water! Radio through and ask for top ups yeah? And don’t forget sun cream!” You chide knowing sometimes the workers forget that they are humans and will push themselves till breaking point!
“Thank you! Really and I’m all good” she says flashing you the large icy bottle of water she had behind the stand with her. “What can I get for you?”
“Any chance we can get the Y/N number hat?” You grin turning to look at Nathan who just rolls his eyes but can’t help the smile that comes into his face.
“Sure! We have lots on stock today, as you know it’s home race! Good luck by the way! I know you’ll do great!” She smiles and hands you the number 42 on the baseball cap. You place it on Nathan’s head who just laughs at your antics but keeps that hat on before paying the lady for it in cash.
“Hey! I was gonna pay for it! I’m the one that got you to buy merch!” You exclaim in horror.
“Mmmm but it’s my hat … so I should pay for it!” He explains with a cat like grin.
“Argh fine come on! I want to show you round the garage and do track walk with you!” You say gently taking his hand and pulling him through the growing numbers of people in the paddock.
You showed him all around the garage and even let him sit in your car which he was really impressed with how low to the ground it felt, and how much the halo restricted vision. After showing him the pit wall and all of the engineers working and running around before free practice you took him out onto the track to do a walk.
The sun wasn’t as harsh anymore and it had started to cloud over a little bit meaning that the track walk wasn’t as strenuous as you anticipated it would be.
You guys walked around talking about the season so far and how it felt being a rookie along with Yuki Tsunoda.
Afterwards it was time for you to have a team meeting and you didn’t want to leave Nathan on his own so you walked him to the hospitality suite to find your parents.
“Mum Dad! Hey this is Nathan! Can you just watch out for him while I’m in the car please!” You ask kindly showing Nathan to a seat with your family.
“Of course sweetheart! Hi Nathan, I’m Adam, this is my wife Cisca” he introduces standing up slightly and leaning forward to shake the younger gentleman’s hand.
“You gonna be okay?” You ask, unsure if you should just bring him to the garage and find him a seat and headphones and leave him there.
“Yeah - I’ll be” he starts only for commotion behind to stop his words.
“Sorry, I’m running late. Oh … whose this?” Lando asks looking over to Nathan, someone he didn’t think would be around his family.
“This is your sisters guest, hence the hat” your mum explained pointing to the hat still on Nathans head.
“Right … yeah I just came here to drop Luisa off. Please look after her and … you know don’t be weird” he begs as Luisa starts to talk to both Flo and Nathan.
“We’re never weird! Now you both have to go get ready!” your dad grins forcing you both away.
You start to walk together to the garage in an awkward silence until Lando breaks it.
“So you brought a boyfriend with you?” Lando scoffs looking towards you.
“And what if I did?” What’s it to you, you brought Luisa!” You say looking to him confused why it was such an issue you’d brought a guy (who wasn’t anything to do with you romantically).
“Because your playing with a lot of hearts here Y/N and it’s not exactly fair. First Charles, then Max, then Charles again and then Max and now this guy? Max and Charles are my friends Y/N and I can’t help but feel like your going to go one step too far and ruin all of this …” he complains and for a second your stunned into silence not knowing what to even say.
“How am I toying with Max and Charles when Max is off with my best friend and Charles … is so hot headed that I don’t know if I can take the heat of him yelling at me for an overtake every race weekend! So how am I the one playing with hearts when it’s feels like mines the only one being toyed with, even by my own fucking brother!” You cried out frustrated with him, but that was Lando. He always spoke before he thought about what he was saying. Both a blessing and a curse.
You started to hurry off no longer wanting to entertain this conversation.
“Y/N wait … I didn’t mean it like that” Lando admits speeding up after you and walking in step with you trying to slow you down.
“We have a meeting to get to. Let’s not waste anymore time” you say coldly, so coldly it actually caused Lando to shiver as he never had heard that tone of voice or anything remotely close come from you.
Briefing for what it was, was pretty boring only talking about the upgrades they’d brought to this weeks Grand Prix. Lando had the full package and you had half, the others to come next week in Hungary.
You were in the garage after changing into your fireproofs, your race suit hanging down off your hips talking to your engineer about strategy for Silverstone, but it was always changeable depending on the track temp and the weather.
FP1 clearly showed Landos new flashy upgrades and how much quicker it made the car placing him in P2 in between Max and Lewis, the two battling it out for the championship this year.
As for you down in 9th you’d just been testing the track and were on different tyres to the top few people, wanting to test out the hards.
As the weekend progressed and the less you concentrated on all of yours issues and just had fun while concentrating on the race weekend you got better. Ending up starting in a decent P6 for the race and getting points in the Sprint that was held earlier on in the day.
“Okay Y/N, it’s looking like Plan B. Reports of rain on the radar for the last half of the race” your engineer says as you pull up into your P6 stop, next to Lando both your Orange McLarens locking out your row.
“Okay, do we have a pit plan?” You ask knowing you were on mediums in hopes they’d last long enough to get you onto Intermediates or Wet if it’s due to rain that badly.
“We’re checking now, looking into stuff with Lando too and seeing what the other teams and looking at doing, but looking like Pit Plan E”
“Yep, copied” he grit out unhappy that they are already prioritising your brother.
“Well Y/N let’s get racing for you first F1 home race! Lecelrc and Bottas in front of you and Lando, Alonso and Vettel behind you and both. And then Max and Hamilton front row” he explains, you knew you had to get a good start to overtake your brother and possibly Charles if there was an opening so as you were driving round the formation lap, you cleared your mind of everything but racing.
Taglist:
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everyb0dysf00l · 3 days
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How the Cullens would react to being asked to hold your drink
(Gifs not mine, creds to owners)
Edward
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General
He is extremely confused
You want him to hold your drink?
For safety?
If you don't know he's a vampire, you've just handed a dude you barely know your beverage, how dangerous
If you do know he's a vampire, how could you trust such a cold-hearted, soulless monster with something so important?
If you can't tell, he's extremely self-loathing
He'll most likely agree but very reluctantly
Although he probably doesn't care about you, he can read the minds of the people in the party/bar you're in and knows how dangerous it is for you to leave your drink unattended
He probably wouldn't be able to live with himself if he didn't
Dating
He's already taken it before you can ask
Guard dog mode turned to 100
He's surveying the area like crazy
If even one person with a bad thought/aura comes near your drink he's glaring them down
Hand over the top, vice grip on the cup itself
Tbh if you're dating him he probably won't want you at a place like this at all
Rosalie
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General
I'm sorry to say this but she would probably look at you judgementaly
You'll have to explain it to her, not because she doesn't understand why you want her to hold it but because she is genuinely just that judgemental
She'll probably sigh and snatch the cup out of your hands, telling you to "be quick"
No one wants to come near that drink with her holding it, trust me
Her death glares will scare anyone in a five mile radius away
And if some guy walks up to her thinking he could somehow pull her he'll be dealt with
Dating
"Of course, hun"
No hesitation
She wants what's best for you and that absolutely means holding your drink while you go to the bathroom
She doesn't cover it with her hand but she definitely keeps it close to her body
If anyone so much as looks at the drink for too long they're getting a very intense death glare
Will hand it back with a smile when you return
Emmett
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General
"Of course, dude!"
*instant regret*
This man is going to spill that drink 0.2 seconds after you hand it to him
What can I say the man goes wild at the parties
Can he drink liquor? No, but when has that ever stopped him before?
Definitely forgets he can't drink and downs the whole thing
Only realises when you come back and ask where your drink is
Gets Edward to buy you a new one
He isn't trusted with a credit card
Dating
Not much of a difference tbh
Except maybe, MAYBE, he takes a bit better care of it
Doesn't understand why you want him to hold it
Probably assumes you don't want gross bathroom particles in it or something
When he finds out the real reason, he goes from goofy to serious almost immediately
"Wait, so there are people here who want to put stuff in your drink so they can..."
Contrary to popular belief, Emmett has a good understanding of how fucked up the world is. Growing up in poverty gave him a pretty good idea
But he last drank in the 1920s, drink drugging wasn't really a big thing back then
He's 100% more protective over you and the drink now
Literally offering to fight anyone whose stupid enough to come near it
Alice
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General
Alice is always looking to talk to new people so she'll 100% hold your drink happily
Somehow manages to continue dancing while holding the drink and not spilling it
Definitely thinks about how easy it would be for her to do something to it
She wouldn't, obviously, but she definitely thinks about it once or twice
Unless Edward bribes her with something, in which case she'll 100% do something to it (sorry 😬)
"A porche, you say"
But she likely will take good care of it regardless
Dating
Will take it no questions asked
Jokes about already knowing you'd ask her to hold it
Waits for you outside the bathroom so you two can continue dancing
If anyone comes near it she threatens them in the sweetest voice possible with a smile on her face
Jasper
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General
The man is bamboozled
He's just staring at you in his Jasper way trying his best not to eat you
Why are you asking him?
Ask Emmett or something
Its an awkward silence with you just stood there waiting for an answer
Alice will eventually show up and take it from you, reassuring you she'll take care of it
Dating
But of course
He's got an iron hold on this cup
He can feeling other people's emotions he definitely knows what type of people are at this party/bar
He won't come out from his corner until you come back
Will stare at anyone who comes near it like
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Esme
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General
This sweetheart doesn't care if you're a total stranger, she'll hold your drink absolutely.
She isn't extreme with the way she holds your cup, just a simple hold relaxed to her body
She's most likely either with Carlisle or the other moms at the party so, she's not going to be around anyone dangerous enough to do anything.
Hopefully
Dating
She'll offer to come with you to the bathroom and will stand outside patiently for you to return.
Sways to the music playing over the speakers but not too much so the drink doesn't spill over.
If a creep tries to do anything to it, she'll put them in their place. Like a mother scolding a scorned child.
I think people tend to forget, Esme has a very traumatic backstory. She isn't blind to the dangers of the world and she knows what kind of people are out there, her ex husband was one of them
Gives it back immediately after you return with a smile on her face
Carlisle
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General
He looks down on drinking and will "scold" you for it but he also knows the dangers of leaving a drink unattended
He's seen too many cases of drink drugging in the ER to just leave someone's drink unattended
If he sees someone leave their's alone he'd approach them to tell them how dangerous it is
He holds the drink relatively normal and keeps an eye out in case someone does try anything but he isn't a full on guard dog over it
He can't be 100% trusted though. This man has committed multiple medical malpractices and justifies it with "science" (remember what he did to Jacob without his consent?)
Dating
He's pretty much the same here
He'll probably try to talk you out of drink more often though
He might be a bit more rigid with how he holds your cup
Again, he's seen too many drink drugging cases to let you leave it unattended
Images of what could happen to you if he doesn't take care of your drink properly are in his mind
Edward might have to try calm him down because his thoughts would be hectic
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Pls like and reblog if you liked this♥
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wosoamazing · 1 day
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A New Chapter
Y/N Williamson Epilogue?? (My last fic before I refresh my page/content...)
IMPORTANT: This fic involves a heterosexual relationship between R and a Fictional character... If this is something you don't want to read I suggest you move on. WARNINGS: bad injury (hip), mentions of hospitals and surgery, moving away, rehab, heterosexual relationships, some swearing, periods, endometriosis, vomit/mentions of, being scared to return home, mild sickness, kids?, hints/links to miscarriage (not everyone will notice), suggestive?? - it's long so there are a lot, I have tried to list them in order, however if you do really want to read it but you can't bc of some of the warnings message me and I can see if I can cut that part of the story out for you. A/N: Not properly edited yet, I will edit it later - so sorry if any mistakes. Also sorry if the second half of it feels rushed, it was getting so long but I may have accidentally rushed it trying to make it not insanely long... (Word Count: 7462 - be prepared, hopefully it's not boring)
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Your dream of playing in an Olympics Final came crashing down 15 minutes into the Matildas’ opening match of the tournament. A corner had been given, Steph kicked it in and the next second you were on the ground in agony, it seemed to happen in fast forward for you. However for Leah, who was watching at home, the moment unfolded so agonisingly slowly, she saw Frohms place a hand on your shoulder restricting you from jumping, as Oberdorf jumped into the air behind you, if it wasn't for Frohms’ hand on your shoulder the goal could’ve been yours, she was angry and hoped the ref had picked up on it, however she wasn’t angry for long, as she saw the trajectory Oberdorf was coming down on, her jump slightly too high meaning she lost control. Time slowed to an almost stop as Leah froze sat in front of the TV, watching as Oberdorfs midsection completely landed on top of your left shoulder, she almost felt her heart stop as she saw your left leg brace, watching as it popped out from the force of Oberdorfs head hitting your thigh, causing you to completely crumple onto the ground. Thankfully the players around reacted quick enough to grab onto Oberdorf and flip her, otherwise your injury wouldn’t have been the worst, and something unimaginable could’ve happened. She saw your body jolt as you were turned onto your back, the look on your face along with the scream you let out indicating your hip most likely popped back into place. The full weight of it all occurred seconds later when a phone was brought onto the pitch and steph did something on it, Leah’s phone started to ring.
“Leah, she,” Steph breathed out not knowing what to say
“I know. I saw. Can I talk to her?” Leah asked before hearing some shuffling from the other end, watching Steph crouch down next to you on the TV.
“Le-ah,” your voice came across the phone, it was full of pain and fear, Leah was honestly surprised you hadn’t passed out from the pain yet, but maybe you were running on adrenaline or shook, all she was certain about was that she needed to be there for you, in one way or another.
“Hi bug, you’re doing so well, being so brave. They are going to take good care of you, I promise. I love you so so much, and I’ll be there very soon, you’ve got this bug,” she told you before Steph took the phone back to her ear as the medics needed to move you, “we’re coming, our flight is in like an hour, we are actually about to leave now,” she informed her club teammate as she watched her fiance leave the bedroom wheeling a suitcase behind her.
______
You were immediately taken into surgery, where they did x-rays and scans. You woke up a few hours later surrounded by machines, unable to feel your left leg, but your left shoulder and torso ached badly, but quickly you noticed Steph, Sam, Leah, Lia and Alexia all sitting around the white washed sterile room. The people who you looked up to in your life and who inspired you, all in a hospital room, to be there for you, for some it meant taking time out of their teams olympic tournament. Maybe even risking unfair punishment and her mental health for one. For two others it meant getting on a plane last minute, dropping all other plans, including the IVF appointment they had waited a year for, not knowing when the next one would be, willingly letting go of their hope to have kids in the near future for you. In that moment you realised how much you meant to them, never before had the meaning of you to them been so tangible, they meant the universe and more to you, but maybe you meant ever more than that to them.
Leah noticed your eyes open and moved beside your bed, “Hey bug, how are you feeling?” she said ever so softly, and you just blinked groggily at her as she leant in to kiss your forehead mumbling “I love you very much,” before her hands moved to cup your face and her thumbs wiped away the silent tears that had started to fall from your eyes. The others all got up and left not only to find a doctor but give you two a moment of privacy.
“Hi, Y/N, nice to see you awake, I’m Dr NAME and this is Dr NAME, we were the two surgeons who operated on you,” one of the doctors spoke as they walked in, smiling at you, you kind of nodded at them and watched as their gaze turned to Leah before going through your chart, “and you’re Leah,” she nodded at them. “Okay so,” he started talking but you were too tired to listen and zoned out, hearing the words, dislocated, hairline fracture, Iliofemoral and Pubofemoral. You would eventually come to find those are the things that happened to your, during the fall your tore your  Iliofemoral and Pubofemoral ligaments, which then meant when Oberdorf’s head hit your thigh it was a lot easier for your hip to dislocate which it did, you had a hairline fracture in your femoral neck but it was unknown which mechanics of the injury caused that, sometimes they would insert a pin but as yours was only small and you were young, they didn’t, it also meant they likelihood of you returning to football was higher, however you still would most likely never return.
You were stuck in Paris until the end of the tournament, the risk of you flying back home versus the ‘risk’ of you staying there were incomparable and so you and your crutches, along with your bandaged hip, sporting the equivalent of a hinged knee brace but for a hip over your leggings, were dragged along to the final match, the first time you had been in the public's eye properly since your injury. You were dreading this match for multiple reasons. It meant you would be in the media’s sight, and you would also have to interact with the people you had been ignoring. But even more it meant you had to watch your teammates and ‘family’ get to do the one thing you had ever dreamt of, the thing that was almost never going to happen now. You stood alongside Sam during the national anthem, wearing an official match jersey, your own name on your back, as a tear rolled down your cheek, which after the anthem Sam wiped away before hugging you tightly. She understood the pain to some extent, however she knew well and truly before the olympics started the team could make it to the final and she would be standing on the sidelines, for you it was different, you should’ve been on that pitch today, if it wasn’t for your injury you would’ve been starting, as the main forward, but that didn;t matter now, you would probably never start for the matildas or any football club/team again, she knew it, the team knew it, the world knew it, you even knew it, you just didn’t want to have to face that reality.
The whistle blew and every single member of the Australian’s on the sidelines got up and sprinted onto the pitch, except you, every single A.O.C football personal was on the pitch celebrating, but you weren’t. You couldn't, you couldn’t get up, but that's not the reason you were not on the pitch, you didn’t want to be, you didn’t deserve to be.
The next second the whole bench shook, Kyra had catapulted herself into the row of seats in front of you, you looked up, her face shiny from sweat, holding the world's biggest grin, “come join us,” you just shook your head, “I can help, I’ll be sensible and careful. Please?” she begged, causing a tear to roll down your cheek, causing her face to quickly drop as she moved to hug you, making you cry more, causing more girls to start to filter over to you, all leaving with dampened moods, all having failed attempts at cheering you up and failing to convince you to join them. All celebrating as they walked across the stage receiving their medals, whilst they lifted the trophy, but the pain in their eyes was evident, you watched Kyra bite her nail nervously as she looked into your direction, you were still sat in you seat, having refused to collect your medal, you played 15 minutes you didn’t deserve it. You burdened the team, Steph spent way too long laying awake in her bed, the moment replaying in her head everytime she closed her eyes. Kyra cried herself to sleep almost every night, she missed you, you might’ve been with them physically but that was it, she knew she would have to go back to Arsenal without you and most likely never play with you again and that hurt her. Macca couldn’t shake the feeling of horror that ran through her body as she heard your scream so loud and clear from the other end of the pitch, she hadn’t even had her hearing aids in and yet it sounded like you were inside her ear. If anything the team had won in spite of you, you had in no way helped them get there, you were the cause for their pain, you didn’t deserve a medal at all.
“Bebita,” Alexia said softly as she bobbed down in front of you, “No,” you harshly snapped at her, “Et mereixes una medalla, les vas aconseguir aquí i vas formar part de l'equip sigui el que passi. (You deserve a medal, you got them here and you were part of the team no matter what),” you just shook your head at her, “Bé, doncs, almenys deixa'm agafar el teu i guardar-lo segur per a tu, per quan el vulguis després. (Well then at least let me take yours and keep it safe for you, for when you want it later.)” you shrugged your shoulders and so she placed your medal around her neck, for you. Before pulling you into a tight hug and not letting go for a very long time. The no you said to Alexia had been the last word you spoke to anyone before flying back under the intense supervision of the medics to England, where Lia and Leah meet you at the airport, taking you home.
______
“What’s wrong?” your sister asked, having put up with your attitude for way too long knowing you needed to break and rather than continuing to walk on eggshells waiting for you to break she decided to do it the hard way, allowing you to use her as a punching bag until you broke.
“What’s wrong, you’re fucking joking right, are you somesort of imbesile,” you sneered at her, “Oh I don’t know, maybe the fact I’ll never fucking play again, my career is over at 18, the rug has literally been swept out from under my feet, and none of it was even my fault, noone even got a fucking red, for ending my career, the ref decided that a career ending injury didn’t equate to a red. I had to watch as my friends my family lived out my dream, my fucking dream, I’m olympian, but am I really, 15 fucking minutes out of a minimum 540 minutes, I’m 2% of an olympian, I suppose that 2% counts though right? It’s not like I helped the team, I made it harder, I don’t deserve a medal but everyone else seems to think otherwise.”
“But you do bug, you were there, you got your team there, you were going to be the best young player of the year,” Leah tried to reason with you.
“Going being the key word there, I was going to win a Balloon d’or, I was going to be in the fifa best 11, I was going to win a golden boot, I was going to be and do so many things, but going is past tense, it’s never going to happen, I’m never going to get any awards ever again.” You shouted at her.
“Where are you going?” Leah asked as she watched you stand up, the room having fallen to silence moments ago.
“Away from you, I-, I-” you shook your head trying to clear your mind, Leah stepped closer to you, knowing your walls were about to crumble.
“What am I meant to do now, Le?” you asked, completely and utterly broken, “What happens now?”
Leah swallowed back her emotions “I don’t know bug, I’m sorry,” you collapsed into her and she picked you up being mindful of your hip, before lying down on the couch, your body on top of hers. You buried your head into her neck as you sobbed, your whole body shook, and all Leah could do was hold you, and try and comfort you and reassure you in a moment where there were no answers, how are you meant to comfort someone and give them reassurance when the doctors don’t even know. How are you meant to tell someone it's going to be okay when the only way to know what will happen is for them to go through an excruciating rehab process only to then very likely be told they could never play again.
____________________________________________________________
You were cleared to fly long distances 3 months after your surgery, 2 months since you returned, so that’s what you did. You flew to Australia, bought an apartment and started a new life essentially, one that not everyone knew your past in intricate detail, however being a Matilda most people knew who you were but it was different.
Charlie got Lachlan to keep an eye on you and so you did things with his friends and sometimes even his team. You found yourself getting closer to one of his friends in particular, he always made sure you weren't left behind because they were walking too fast, he was ‘coincidentally’ at the same rehab gym you went to when you first put weight on your leg still relying on your crutches heavily, he celebrated for you but quite, not to make you uncomfortable, he offered to drive you to your appointment the one where you were allowed to use only one crutch, he celebrated for you then too, a bit more openly but not nearly as enthusiastic as he would’ve liked. You invited him to the appointment where you would start walking without any assistance, he celebrated quite loudly for you that day, insisting he needed to take you out for dinner, you accepted it, hoping it would lead to something more, and it did. You quickly found yourself spending more time at his house than yours, more of your belongings there than you had at your own home. He was honestly perfect, and for whatever reason you had this feeling that a shoe would drop any second. 
— FLASHBACK — 
One night he woke up to you crying in your sleep, sitting up slightly he noticed there was blood on the sheets underneath you. Shaking you softly, he woke you up, before quietly saying “Baby, I think you’ve come on.”
“Shit,” you sighed out before curling into a tighter ball, “Why don’t you go have a shower and I’ll change the sheets,” He offered as he kissed your shoulder.
“I’m sorry,” you mumbled, rolling over to your back, “why?”, “because I’ve bleed all over the sheets, sorry,” “Baby, it's just a little blood, it’s okay, don’t worry,” you nodded before getting up and hobbling to the bathroom.
“Hey, babe you okay?” he asked as he approached the bathroom door, having finished changing the sheets, you didn’t reply to him, but he heard the muffled sounds of you crying, “I’m coming in okay,” he told you before softly opening the door, seeing you on the floor, your legs curled underneath you, as you sobbed, he bobbed down next to you, placing a hand on your back, “Do I need to take you to the hospital? I don’t think this is normal,” you shook your head as you reached to grab his hand as another wave of pain washed over you, taking a deep breath you fought off the nausea before blurting out “endometriosis,” hoping he could make conclusions from that.
“Do you need your tablets or something?” he asked and you looked at him confused. How did he know?
“My sister's girlfriend has it, I don’t know much about it but I know some things. Are your tablets in the drawer in the kitchen with the tape and stuff, are they the things in the arsenal pouch?” He asked and you nodded, being in too much pain to talk. He quickly left and returned, with your tablets, some water and heat packs.
“Not blue box,” you told him and he nodded before popping out some of the other tablets as per the labels and handing them to you.
“Do you want me to hold you?” he asked as a tear rolled down your cheek, “But-” you tried to protest weakly.
“I honestly don't care. I just want to help, I want you to feel better,” you nodded shyly at him and he picked you up placing you in his lap as he handed you a heat pack, you curled up and hid your head in his chest, falling asleep eventually.
— END FLASHBACK — 
You met up with some of the Matildas’ for coffee during one of their camps, and he and Lachlan came, him on the basis he was Lachlan’s friend.
“How long?” Steph asked as she walked alongside you, both slightly behind the others.
“What?” “You know what I mean, how long?” “I don’t know, it started as friends and then the lines blurred and then somewhere along the way he asked me to be his girlfriend,” she hummed in response, “Have you told Leah?” “What do you think,” you asked her before Harper ran up to you.
Later that night you were lying in bed next to him, head resting on his shoulder as his finger drew soft circles on your hip, over your leggings, when your phone buzzed.
Steph: You need to tell Leah. I know you don’t want to, but just think about it this way, at least you won't be telling her in person. But no, I seriously think telling her sooner rather than later would be better.
You sighed after reading her message dropping your phone on the mattress next to you, you dreaded telling your sister, especially when you already barely spoke.
“What’s wrong,” he asked as you rolled on top of him, letting out a heavy breath.
“Steph figured us out and is insisting I tell Leah,”  “Oh, why don’t you want to tell Leah?” “Do you want to tell your brother?” “Shit no,” “Exactly,” there is a pause,  “but I do need to tell Leah, especially if I am going to go back when you go on holidays,”
“You can stay here, you know that right?”
“No, I have to go back. Barça wants to announce my departure officially anyway. I don’t have a choice,” you sighed out, “what if I messaged and then just threw my phone out”
“You know you can’t do that,” he chuckled softly, causing you to groan as you rolled off him.
“I don’t want to have to face them all, I ran away, they probably want nothing to do with me anymore anyway,”
“I don’t know if that’s true, Steph and Kyra were so happy and excited to see you today, so was the rest of the team but especially them.” he said and you nodded before he spoke again, “Well I don’t know about Charli, she was too busy catching up with Lachy to even notice you were there I think,” you laughed at his comment, you turned the TV onto the Arsenal match which was about to start as the pair of you feel into silence.
“Would you ever want kids?” he asked you out of the blue.
“Um, yeah, most likely, especially now it won’t be interrupting my career,” you tried to joke, “why?” “Oh, just curious, you were just really good with Harper and her little brother today, and I don’t know why but that thought came up. Also, doesn't Steph have a kid?” 
“Yeah, he stayed in London with Dean for this camp,” he just nodded as your attention both went back to the game.
____________________________________________________________
“What do you want for lunch?” Leah asked as you sat down in one of the kitchen stools as Leah and Lia walked into the kitchen. Leah had picked you up from the airport but as Harry was actually on holiday with his friends you went your separate ways, however you had a lunch planned for tomorrow with him, you, Leah and Lia.
“Not eggs,” Lia injected before you could answer, you were confused about her answer but just nodded anyway.
“Um, I don’t really care, I’m not that hungry anyway,”
They decided on Ham Sandwiches for lunch and as you ate you caught up with them, before ending up on the couch watching TV with them, they were still talking however you had fallen more silent, leaning into Leah’s side for a hug, “You okay? You’ve just gone a bit quiet and look a bit pale,” Leah asked looking down at you.
“Mmm, I’m just a bit tired,” you admitted.
“Why don’t you go up to sleep, we have no plans until tomorrow.” you nodded before moving to go upstairs.
______
“Bug you okay?” Leah asked as she sat down on the edge of the bed, brushing her hand over your face causing you to stir slightly.
“Mmmm, sorry do you want me to go?” you mumbled half asleep.
“No, it’s okay, you can stay in here, just wanted to check you were okay,” you nodded slightly before letting out a rather chesty cough, “you sure about being okay?” you just groaned at her before rolling over, feeling her slip in behind you and pull you in for a hug, it felt just like old times.
“What are you doing in here?” Leah asked as she entered the bathroom, obviously just waking up from her midday nap.
“I feel like I’m going to be sick,” you informed her.
“Oh, scoot forward,” she instructed you and you moved away from the wall. She sat behind you before pulling you onto her lap, you collapsed back into her, resting your head on her shoulder.
“I’m sorry,” you said breaking the silence as you turned your head on her shoulder so you could look at her, “I should’ve told you, you did some much for me, you were there for me my whole life and then I just up left, no warning, nothing, and then I basically ghosted you,”
“It’s okay,” she told you
“But it wasn’t, I even told you about Harry over text, the first thing I told you in months after not even telling you I could walk without crutches was that I had a-” “Boyfriend,” “Well yeah,”
“I understand, and I understood, it was hard, don’t get that wrong, but it isn’t the only time one of us has just upped and left, I think you’d remember how once I got my professional contract and I had to move, I didn’t tell you, I couldn’t bare to see your sad little face when I told you, so I just left, at least you had a reason, I didn’t have one at all, and you technically had two reasons, the injury and payback,”
“I forgot about that, but thank you for reminding me, I will use it if Mum or Dad get angry at me,” 
“Please don’t, but I do understand. You did it for you, you needed to find yourself, figure out who you were without football, which meant you needed to be separated from everything that reminded you of what was once, of what you loved and still love, and that included us, and it;s okay. I was never angry, I just really missed you, you’re still my baby sister, and no matter what happens you will still be the most important person in my life.”
“Oh,” you felt your gut sink at her confession, suddenly the feeling of being sick became very real, “I’m sorry,” you replied quietly as you moved your head back flat against her shoulder, staring at the ceiling. You felt your mouth fill with saliva and closed your eyes taking some deep breaths.
“Should we cancel lunch tomorrow?” Leah asked as you continued to take deep breaths knowing why you were.
“No,” you said as you shook your head, the nausea having finally passed, “I’ll be fine, I just need to sleep more,”
“Okay, also Lia has an appointment with the medics tomorrow just so they can do some checks and stuff, it's before lunch but you’ll probably have to come and just hang out at the club because otherwise we might be late to lunch,” you nodded your head before you felt yourself dozing off.
____
“Hey, how are you?” Aaron asked as he walked into the gym followed by Declan, you had decided to do some of your rehab exercises while you waited for Lia and Leah.
“Yeah, pretty good. You?” You replied kindly
“Alright, know much about your prospects yet?” he asked, referring to your hip, you froze, not knowing what to say.
“Um, not yet, still another month until I find out,” you lied, you had already been told, but you weren’t ready to tell anyone else yet.
As you continued with your exercises, you couldn’t help but notice your heart rate get faster and your chest get tighter as time passed. When you felt yourself slightly shaking you slipped out of the gym, sliding down the wall in the hallway, your actions didn’t go unnoticed by declan who quickly followed you out but walked past you down to the medics office. He returned following behind Leah, who bobbed down next to you before looking up at him.
“Please don’t tell anyone about what we were speaking about in there,” she asked him
“Of course I wouldn’t Leah, it’s your own personal information, I’m sorry for interrupting, it’s just that,” he gestured towards you, “and if you need anything, don’t hesitate to ask.”
“No thank you,” she said before shifting her focus to you.
“Hey, what's going on? You okay? Do you feel sick?” she asked in a soft, concerned voice, you couldn’t manage to speak so you just shook your head, “Take some deep breaths, you’re okay, it’s okay, nothing happened, you’re safe.”
“I can’t play,” you managed to get out after some deep breaths, the words almost immediately lifting a weight of your chest, “I’m never going to play again, I can’t,” you told her before breaking down into tears.
“Oh Bug, I’m so sorry,” she said as she pulled you in for a tight hug.
“How much longer are we here for?” you asked as you pulled away, having calmed down slightly.
“Probably ten more minutes. Have you thought about what you’re going to do?”
“A little, once I was out long term the offers started to come out anyway but I haven’t really considered them. I’m thinking of coaching though, I just can’t decide,” Leah hummed in response to you, and you sat in silence, just embracing her presence until Lia came out.
____________________________________________________________
After you spoke with Leah and Lia about not playing it was decided you needed to ask someone who wasn’t affected by your choice in any way. So you decided on going to Barcelona at the same time as Harry, for different reasons though. Hoping Alexia could help and give you some guidance.
So that’s how you found yourself sat in your seat on the plane as it sat on the tarmac waiting to disembark, your right knee bounced up and down uncontrollably as you nervously looked up and down the aisle. When you felt a hand placed on your knee, you jumped slightly before relaxing into the touch slightly, “It’s going to be okay, stop worrying, from what you’ve told me they will only care that you are okay and safe, they might be slightly annoyed but they’ll understand.” You nodded whilst stilling looking around, “and remember you can call me at anytime and I can come to you at anytime you want me to, the boys won't mind, they might just make a condition that they have to meet the team if that occurs,” you both let out a light laugh at that.
As you walked out of customs his hand slipped into yours, and you dropped your head onto his shoulder, causing him to kiss your temple. Just ahead you saw Lucy, who had raised her eyebrows, ignoring her you turned to him and hugged him. “I’m going to miss you so much,” you mumbled into his neck, “Same, but remember you can call whenever you need and I’ll call every night,” you nodded before you pulled your head out of his neck and your lips connected, your legs lifting to wrap around his waist as he wrapped his arms around yours.
“All right you two, stop sucking face, we need to go,” Lucy said interrupting you.
You huffed at her and she gave you the same look she would give you when you huffed at her for not getting you second ice cream when you were younger at England camps.
“Didn’t take you as someone who would be into PDAs Mini Leah,” Lucy teased you knowing the nickname would set you off.
“Well Lucy, when you’re in love, those things don’t matter,” you replied to her dramatically as you followed her out of the airport.
____
Its safe to say walking into the place you called home two years ago was emotional, and as you stood there waiting for Lucy to get everything she needed out of the car, Alexia and Mapi walked by, however Mapi halted, she was stopped in her tracks, as she was behind alexia who hadn't noticed you, and kept walking.
“Ale, Alexia,” Mapi stood there calling for her, “Alexia” she shouted,
“Què (what)”, Mapi couldn’t do anything other than gesture to you with her head, Alexia came running back down the hall and froze when she saw you.
“What’s wrong with them?” Lucy asked as she finally walked through the doors.
They stuttered, not being able to get words out, Lucy just ignored them and pulled you along behind her, to the pitch, where everyone was celebrating. Making your way over to where Ingrid, Frido and Ona stood, all giving you a hug, before a small girl came running up to you, “opp, Klem,” she said whilst she made grabby hands at you, she was Ingrid and Mapi’s daughter.
“I’m sorry, I can’t pick you up because I have an ouchie hip,” you said as you looked at her softly before looking back up at your old teammates, who all gave you sorry looks.
“Please don’t do that, that’s not why I came,” you sighed out before walking over to where Olga was standing by herself.
“Hi,” she said as she smiled and hugged you, you caught Alexia looking at you with a concerned look from the corner of her eye, Lucy and Kiera were talking to her and Mapi, most likely about how you didn’t want to be treated differently etc.
“Hi, is she mad?” you asked Olga, stepping away from the hug slightly.
“What?” “That I didn’t come to the wedding?” “A little upset Si, but not mad, more concerned, but we understood.” you nodded at her “it did take a week to calm her down after she found out you left England, she wasn’t mad though, more scared of whether you were safe or not,” you nodded weakly as you bit your bottom lip.
“Bebita,” Alexia said as she came up to you hugging you, before standing between you and Olga, almost the whole team following behind, creating a circle as they all started talking, it felt just like old times, like no time had passed, but it had almost been two years, you were struggling to follow the conversation like you used to, having not used your spanish in so long, everything was bringing back old times, old memories, memories you wished you could keep living, but this chapter of your life was over now, you moved to stand in front of Alexia and hug her, she wraps her arms around you whilst continuing her conversations, your shoulders started to shake softly as you started to cry and everyone looked at her concerned however she shook her head, indicating for them to continue and ignore it. After a while you seemed to have managed to calm down and you pulled away from Allexia slightly, she cupped your face in her hands, “Whatever happens, it's going to be okay.” you gave her a weak nod before moving to stand next to her.
“We are going for dinner at Ingrid and Mapi’s tonight, most of the team will be there and I think Harder and Erikson are coming too, you can come if you want.” Alexia said as you entered the ever so familiar house.
“Um, okay,” you said as you placed your phone on the table and went to grab a drink from the fridge before hearing your phone ring, Alexia caught a glimpse of the screen as she handed it to you. She knew exactly who it was from the look on your phone, not who the person was but who they were to you.
“Don’t tell anyone please, not many know yet,” she nodded, “do I get to meet this boy?”
“Alexia,” Olga called out sternly from the living room, clearly she still was in charge, something that hadn’t changed.
“Maybe, I think his friends and him are going to the game this weekend,” you said before you answered the phone and retreated to the spare room noticing how it was still your room and not a spare room at all.
____
You were sitting on the floor with Hailee, having been dragged away from your conversation with Mapi, Ingrid, Alexia and Olga by the small girl into her playroom. Not that you really minded though.
“They’ve told you you can’t play again haven’t they,” you were startled slightly by the unfamiliar voice, looking up to see Madga leaning on the door frame.
“How did you know?”
“I don’t know, I just could tell, maybe because I only knew you as football, where as they knew you as football and you, so they can’t see it. Does anyone know?”
“Yeah, Lia and Leah, and someone else, and now also you supposedly,” you flatly replied.
“What are you doing tomorrow?” you looked at her blankly, “I’ll take that as nothing, what if you came over to Frido’s while the team is at training and Pernille and I help you decide, we have no connection, it could help,”
“Bayern don’t need a new coach?” she shook her head, and you just nodded slightly, “okay so it’s settled then,” she said before turning around, “Frido, do you have a big whiteboard at home? If no, we need to buy one before tomorrow morning,” you heard her yell out as she walked away.
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Having made your decision with the help of Magda and Pernille you returned to England with Harry. To tell Arsenal, after it was official, just not yet announced, you went for lunch with Leah, Lia and Harry to tell them all, Lia and Leah took it well however Harry jumped out of his seat saying he needed to be somewhere, and since he wouldn’t return your calls, so you had no clue if you would see him or not, maybe he was leaving you.
“Turn around,” Steph said as she saw Harry running to the facility doors where you were waiting for Lia and Leah to get out of the car, having a chat with Steph.
“Will you move in with me?” He blurted out, slightly puffed as he reached you.
“What?” You questioned not understanding what he meant.
“I didn’t answer your call, or your message or your subsequent calls because I was doing something, for you, for me, for us. Remember how I played Rugby Union in high school,” you nodded, “well, I wasn’t ignoring you because I was mad you took the job, I wasn’t ignoring you at all, I was trialling for a rugby club, so we could be together, I love you too much and you mean too much for me to go back halfway across the world from you. They offered me a contract, it isn’t the greatest, but it will do, anything that means I can stay with you is perfect,” tears started to fall from your eyes, “I’m sorry,” he said slightly panicking, questioning if he said something wrong.
“No, no,” you said as you shook your head, wrapping your arms around his neck and picking your legs up “Thank you,” you mumbled into his ear before placing your head on his shoulder, not believing it.
“I’m assuming it worked?” Leah asked as she walked towards the three of you, he nodded in her direction as you let go, “ready to do this?” your sister asked as she looked at you and you nodded, starting to feel nervous agin.
____
“I’m coming back to Arsenal,” you told everyone as you stood in front of them, Harry standing on the sides, Jonas inisting he come in considering he was there already, they all cheered slightly before you interrupted them, “but not in the way you probably all want, I’m going to be part of the staff, the coaching team, I-,” your voice cracked, as you took a shaky breath “I won’t-, I-I can’t ever play again. I will never be able to play again, it’s uncertain whether I will be able to run without pain, let alone play,” you sniffed, you felt panic rise within you, “I’m sorry,” you said quietly before walking out the door tears streaming down your face, trying to ignore the looks of sorry, disappointment or confusion. Leah’s immediate reaction was to stand up and go to you, but Lia tugged her arm forcing her back down in her chair, gesturing to the figure that was rushing out the door after you. 
-
“I’m sorry, I-'' you blubbered out as someone came towards you, “Hey, none of that, baby none of this is your fault, and you literally have nothing to apologise about,” he said as he stood in front of you, you immediately fell into him at the sound of his voice and felt his strong arms hold you tight as you buried your head in his neck, he started swaying you and gave you a small kiss on the side of your head every now and then, trying to calm you down, knowing that was probably one of the hardest things you had to say, he knew you always wanted to finish your career at Arsenal, and now that was never going to happen, at least in the way you wanted, you would never be a Matilda again, you would never walk out onto a football pitch in the same way again, your goals were changing and you were struggling with that. He knew that, no matter how much you tried to hide your feelings.
The door creaked as it opened and Harry looked over to it, seeing Steph walk out, who handed him a water bottle as she gave him a soft smile before walking back into the room. He continued to sway you both slightly, keeping one hand around you as he took a quick sip from the bottle.
“Baby, do you want some water?” you nodded, taking the bottle of him and drinking out of it.
-
Leah was still inside crying into Lia’s shoulder, most people had left the room now giving everyone a bit of space. “Do you want to go home? Is this about what just happened or this morning?”
“All of it. It’s stupid, I just feel like I’m losing her now too, and it’s dumb, she was never mine in the first place but-” Leah confessed, before getting cut off by Lia.
“It’s not stupid Le, we have a lot of things happening in our life, a lot of news, and not a lot of time to process it all, it’s hard, and I know you feel like you have to be strong for her, for me, for us but you don’t, it’s okay,” Lia tried to reassure her.
“I shouldn’t be upset, I mean you're the one going through it all, and here I am complaining about my life.” Leah hiccuped.
“Hey, I might be the only one going through it physically but mentally we are both going through it, and you have more on your mind then I do, I understand, you don’t have to apologise for being upset, no matter if I’m experiencing worse, we are a team forever and always no matter what happens, no matter whether we have an addition to our team or not.” Leah nodded before pulling away from her and standing up noticing you had come back inside.
She pulled you towards you and wrapped you in a much needed hug, you didn’t want to let go, and neither did she.
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2028 Olympic Games
As the final whistle blew your players immediately ran over to you and your staff, celebrating as a team. 
Commentator One: And they’ve done it, the Matildas have won the Olympics for the second time in a row. 
Commentator two: Y/N Williamson has led the Matildas to victory after a drought, a much needed piece of silverware for the team that was starting to lose the country's hope.
It was a risky decision for Football Australia to choose you as new head coach, even you knew it, especially as you would only be joining the team in person at camp three weeks before the Olympics started, due to circumstances, but you started work much earlier than that, much to everyone's disbelief. You were however quickly ushered away from your team for a post match interview, causing you to catch sight of your sister who has collapsed onto the floor in tears. Taking a mental note to go over and comfort her later.
“Do you want to go see your Auntie?” You said to the two small people who clutched onto your hands as you walked onto the pitch.
“We-ah,” “we see Weah,” they piped up at the mention of her and you let go of their hands, “go on then,” you watched as they ran over to her, smiles bright, not knowing the meaning of the moment that just happened, them being so happy just to see their Aunt. 
“Alessia, hand the baby over,” you said to her as she held the newest addition to the Williamson family.
“Do you want to go say hi to your Mummy?” you asked the 3 month old as you placed her against your chest.
Leah’s face softened even more as she watched you approach her with her daughter, “you know, I’m never going to be able to thank you enough or repay you for this,” she said as you passed Lilly over to her, “but maybe you taking the gold away from me, means I don’t have to.”
“I told you, it’s nothing, honestly, you don’t have to repay me, buuut…..” you dragged on, she raised an eyebrow, “can you take the boys tonight, I have some celebrating to do,” you told her as she rolled her eyes.
“You literally carried our baby for us, I do owe you, and yes of course I’ll take the boys tonight, I need some quality time with them before they leave me for Australia,” she replied.
“It’s only two weeks, it's just a short camp, and it’s time we went on one of Daddy’s camps and meet all their uncles, but they honestly think they are meeting Kangaroos, they don’t quite understand that Wallabies is just the name of the team” she laughed at your comment before pulling you in for a hug. It sounds cliche but you knew in that moment your life had turned out perfect, it is nowhere near what you imagined but you honestly couldn’t have asked for anything better.
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