#and it sounded hilarious so I subscribed to it

[arrowmaker15]

(in the manor)

Jason: But why can't I eat them?

Tim: For the LAST DAMN TIME, Alfred did not make them, and those are not the cookies I'm talking about!

Jason: Why call it cookies if you can't eat them, though?

Tim: Goddamnit, Jason-

[brucewaynehater101]

After Tim rescued Bruce from the Time Stream I feel like Tim would start to favor the League of Assassins as his preferred stress ball to the point that they’ve started preparing for it with drills to evacuate a base in the same way schools do fire drills.

Tim is well aware of this and will occasionally choose a base that’s already in the midst of evacuating because that just makes his job easier.

Sometimes the ninjas think it’s just a drill and “that’s the 3rd one today, are you serious?” so they don’t take it as seriously until they see Ra’s booking it as fast as he can to the safe zone that they realize this one is real and not just a Stress Test and it’s suddenly every ninja for themselves.

The image of Ra's booking it across his base is causing me to cackle. He cares so much about presentation (you can't be an assassin overlord without a scary reputation) that him sprinting is hilarious. I know he has great running techniques, but I love the mental image of him pumping his arms as he books it across base, and a bunch of assassins get blown up in the background.

Also, I'm super curious what their fire drills would be like. I know alarm sounds differ depending on the country, so does Ra's have a different one per a base or a standard LoA fire alarm sound? I'd love to see fanart of Ra's directing fire drills.

Depending on which hc or canon you subscribe to, I could definitely see LoA bases being a favorite of Tim's to mess with. I think, if he was only feeling slightly petty, he'd do small things. Blowing up the bases is his last resort. Why destroy a place he has an address to if he can send Ra's a box of cooked spaghetti noodles and instant mash potatoes?

Tim likes installing LED lights in random places of the bases to set the mood for the occasion. The number of times Ra's has had to postpone a meeting because Tim somehow got LEDs in his meeting room is over ten. Assassination attempts on Red Robin were increased after the fourth time Tim made the LEDs blue after a "sad" report.

[aouiaa]

[✶] — YOUTUBER!ELLIE HEADCANNONS

DISCLAIMERS & WARNINGS — EIGHTEEN PLUS, Mentions of pooping + Cursing (Girl cursing like she just learned) + Mention of hand pics (I think that’s it).

AUTHORS NOTE, took fucking forever to make that image, but i love it. — inspo layout: @andersonfilms :3

Imagining Youtuber!Ellie who is blatantly honest on youtube. It’s scary.

She’s playing a random indie video game she found on steam, and giving her commentary as usual. Until there’s a sudden cut and she’s now in different clothes than the previous and she goes on to explain why.

“Hey, guys. Sorry, I had to take a massive shit, but guess who survived? This guy!” she says with a comical smile while pointing at herself before unpausing the game and playing as if nothing happened.

But for some reason, Youtuber!Ellie can’t let go that she pooped.

“But yeah, guys, like, shit, that fucker was begging to come out, so I’m sorry if I was acting different. I was clenching my asshole.”

How charming….ANYWAYS.

Imagining Youtuber!Ellie’s videos who have these stupid sound effects or pop-up memes for certain scenes.

Imagining Youtuber!Ellie having a resting bitch face when she’s focused.

Imagining Youtuber!Ellie who cusses too much even in her intro, she’s literally cussing.

Imagining Youtuber!Ellie who got a warning from YouTube themselves for it.

Imaging Youtuber!Ellie who literally said “Fuck that, I’m not following Youtube’s rules.” and continued cussing until she realized that she was getting less ads on her videos to which she decided to do a test. To see if her subscribers would notice if she did a full video, not cursing.

Imagining Youtuber!Ellie who’s laughing while reading the comments on the video.

DarthVaderfan101: “Yo, y’all noticed how Ellie didn’t cuss once?”

Quacketyquack12: “Great vid btw no cussing?! THAT’S A FIRST!”

Elliesprettygirl: Sooo when’s our wedding?

Imagining Youtuber!Ellie who does eventually swallows her pride and abides by Youtube’s rules.

Imagining Youtuber!Ellie whose user is some cringe 2011 based name; Ellieswolfgang.

God, I can just fucking imagine Youtuber!Ellie intro and how it would correlate with the user.

“Yo! What’s up my little wolves! *Queue the wolf howling* We are back with another video and today we’re playing another puppet combo game!”

Imagining Youtuber!Ellie who thinks it’s too hilarious, and doesn’t change the username. And it’s always funny to see people every now and then comment about it.

Iloveellieswolfgang: “Woah, are we apart of your pack or something?”

Ellieswolfgang: Yeah, if you’re subscribed then you’re a part of the gang.

Imagining Youtuber!Ellie who has the most funniest responses when replying to fans.

Wolfgangnation: “Yo, Ellieswolfgang! 👋”

Ellieswolfgang: “Yo, Wolfgangnation!”

Dyk3ang3l: AHHHH I LITERALLY JUMPED WHEN I SAW YOUR NOTIFICATION POP UP ON MY PHONE JEHDBSHAS

Ellieswolfgang: Ma’am, this is a library.

les4elliewilliams: So why is your name, Ellieswolfgang?

Ellieswolfgang: I don’t know, les4elliewilliams. Why is yours, les4elliewilliams?

Imagining Youtuber!Ellie who wakes up at the asscrack of dawn—her words—to make Youtube videos, and edits them before eight am.

Imagining Youtuber!Ellie who is known for her out of pocket humor.

“That isn’t a guy! That’s an ass with eyes!”

“GodDAMN, that bitch can lick three assholes from that tongue.”

Imaging Youtuber!Ellie who asks her followers on twitter to send her funny videos or scary videos to react to.

Imagining Youtuber!Ellie who flinched so hard while watching a scary video a subscriber sent, she fell off her chair.

Gamerpro121: “Surprised she didn’t fall off her chair this time LMAOO

Ellieswolfgang: Literally the lowest point in my life… 💔

Gamerpro121: Oh shit, sorry man.

Imagining Youtuber!Ellie who has to explain her jokes from time to time because some boomer doesn’t get it.

Ellieswolfgang: No, not actually. 😭 nvm..

Gamerpro121: Oh…OHHHH

Imagining Youtuber!Ellie who was shocked when her merch quickly sold out after minutes of it just being released.

“Holy fuck, thank you guys for selling out my merch?! Didn’t expect that shit to happen! Man, y’all attacked it like flies attacking shit!”

Charming as always…

Imagining Youtuber!Ellie who sometimes blogs, showing her day to day life, going to the gym, running errands, rating foods from restaurants, etc.

Imagining Youtuber!Ellie who reacts to edits her fans make of her and is also shocked how many people love her hands.

“Woah, fuck youtube, Ima start selling hand pics. Missing the real bag here.”

Imagining Youtuber!Ellie who collabs with her best friend Jesse, playing GTA, Minecraft, cod, and whatever games that her subscribers suggest since they love their dynamic.

Imagining Youtuber!Ellie’s fans who love her dynamic with Jesse because they’re always talking shit to each other.

“You dumbass! That guy was right in front of you!” Ellie yells at Jesse who just got them killed during a 1v1 on Fortnite.

“How is this my fault? It’s not my fault, you suck!”

“Says you! A blind three year old can play better than you.”

Imagining Youtuber!Ellie who makes a video reading hate comments.

Allthegirlslove: “Ellie looks like she smells like shit!”

“Well…Allthegirlslove, new flash, All the girls don’t love you because they’re too busy watching my videos.” She says with a smirk, “And new flash,” she stops and sniffles herself, “I just shower before making this video, thank you very much.”

The video cuts and starts again of her showing the cologne she uses, “This is what I use, buy one and spray it in ya ass!”

Imagining Youtuber!Ellie who actually dresses to impress when she’s about to record a new video.

Imagining Youtuber!Ellie who has her serious moments on the channel and that’s when the true love and support come into light. And she is truly grateful for the fans who can put the joking aside and just be there for her.

Youtuber!Ellie who genuinely loves how far her channel has come since she first started, and genuinely appreciates everyone who helped her meet her milestones.

FIRST PART - NEXT PART

TAGLIST ; @dyk3ang3l, @elliesprettygirl, @les4elliewilliams, @ellies2fingers, @r3starttt, @slut4mascss, @marsworlddd, @bready101

ELLIES TAGLIST ; @herelieskrisy, @mikellie, @slaysksmska, @mina-281, @teawithnosugar, @kitkatkittycat111

[thrillered]

You know I Mountain Dew it for ya Pt.1 | Spencer Agnew x F! Reader |

You started working at Smosh when you were 26, a few years after graduating college. In your down time you wrote and produced your own music. Not that you had much down time, which wasn’t necessarily a problem, you loved your job, you got to work with some of the most creative, talented, and hilarious people you’ve ever met. After working on it for months you finally finished writing and producing your latest single "Espresso". The song blows up but Smosh fans begin to wonder if the song is about her dear friend and coworker Spencer Agnew.

*Every piece of this work is fictional. I was inspired by Sabrina Carpenters song Espresso when I noticed how much it could apply to Spencer lol, I did NOT write or produce Espresso*

-

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Pt. 1: Lunch

“Hello everyone!! And welcome back to another TRY NOT TO LAUGH!” Amanda started, a burst of energy shooting throughout the sound stage. “Don’t worry, we’ve heard your requests so we grabbed Josh to do another MUSICAL episode!”

The cast cheered, you smiled as you stayed ducked behind them. “Because we’re doing a musical episode we invited the one and only Y/N to join us!” Courtney smiled, the group— Amanda, Courtney, Shayne, Angela, and Chanse— splitting to allow you to pop up. 

“Hey everyone!!” You began, the cast and crew clapping and giving whoops of encouragement. “Okay, okay, that’s enough you’re making me blush” you joked, hands behind your back and twisting your foot.

“Don’t stop blushing yet Y/N, we aren’t done talking about you.” Chanse added, shaking your shoulder. 

“We may or may not have had ulterior motives for this musical episode.” Amanda continued. “We invited Y/N to join us because she is releasing a new song!”

“AND because I'm hilariously witty, right?” you joked, causing shayne to roll his eyes. “But! Yes, the day this releases my new single “Espresso” will be premiering at 10 pm PST, like, everywhere you get your music! This song is super fun so I hope you guys like it!” The group cheered and with that the round began.  

With Amanda in the stool first you decided to bust out your Sarah Christ impression for a beautiful ballad about how no establishments will let you smoke in them anymore. Amanda was quick to laugh, almost spraying you in the face, followed by a compliment about how good your Sarah Christ was. 

The game went by smoothly, or as smoothly as a smosh video goes, everyone making each other laugh. During your time in the stool Shayne sang, or rather yelled, one of the lowest notes you'd ever heard. You stayed strong until he had been holding the same note for probably 10 seconds and his face turned the most pained shade of red. 

“Oh thank god!” He said, leaning his hands on his knees as he caught his breath, “I think I would have gone until I passed out” 

The final round ended and you began the outro with applause, “That was so much fun! I demand to be invited to every musical TNTL from now on. Thank you guys so much for watching, we hope you laughed just as much as we did.” 

“Don't forget to stream “Espresso” by Y/N!” Chanse added, resting his chin lightly on your shoulder. 

“It’s SO good! Like, I swear to god, it's been stuck in my head since I heard it for the first time.” Angela added.

“And with that we must part ways..” You began, in a deep melodic tone. “Don’t forget to like and subscribe and check out one of these two videos on your screen! Okay bye!” 

—-

That was two weeks ago and the Try Not To Laugh was being posted today. Your single premiering tonight.  

You sat at your desk, anxiously bouncing your heel as you tried to focus on the doc in front of you. You were supposed to meet with the games team later that afternoon to discuss possible creatives for some upcoming live streams. But the only thing you could focus on was what people would think about your song. 

You aren’t new to making music. In fact, you’ve been writing it since college and even performing it at some open mics and small gigs. But, most people who knew you online knew you from Smosh, not from your musical career. You had about 3,000 monthly listeners, which always astounded you, but this was the first time that you were releasing music that was being promoted by such a large online entity. 

“Keep shaking like that and you’ll cause an earthquake” You turned to see Spencer approaching your desk, hands in his pockets. You opened your mouth to respond but he cut you off, “Everyone is gonna love your song, Y/N. You don’t need to worry.”

“You haven't even heard it yet, Spence” You retorted, having made Spencer (Along with the rest of the cast, minus Angela) swear that he would wait until the release party to listen to it. You leaned your head on your chair to look at him as he sits next to you. 

“Yes, but, you would only put out something good so I trust that the song slaps.” Spencer tried to ease your running mind, only to get a huff in return. “Okay fine.” He began, standing and grabbing your phone while simultaneously turning off your monitor. 

“Wha- Hey” You started, trying to stop him but reacting too slowly.

“We are going out to lunch.” Spencer said, matter of factly.

“But what about the games meeting?” You asked.

“Got moved back an hour, don’t you look at the slack?” he chastised.

“Okay, but isn’t everyone going out tonight anyway?” You questioned, remembering that some of the cast and crew insisted on going out to celebrate your song release.

“Yeah but that’s everyone.” Spencer began, already walking towards the door, “Consider this your pre-game with your best friend.” 

“A pre-game at..” You looked at your barren wrist, “two pm?” 

“One: you’re not wearing a watch. And two: okay, a social pre-game. Plus, I’m not taking no for an answer, so come on and let your wonderful best friend buy you lunch.”  Begrudgingly you agreed. You walked side by side to Spencer's car, him opening the passenger door for you before rounding the front and getting in the drivers side. 

You smiled as you realized where he was taking you. He took you to a little hole-in-the-wall ramen place you two had discovered the year prior. It quickly became you and Spencer's own little spot. Neither of you ever went there without the other unless it meant stopping by to take it to go on the way to the other's apartment for a game or movie night. 

The older Japanese-American couple that owned the restaurant greeted you with warm smiles, “The usual?” the husband, Kenji, asked. 

You both nodded as you took a seat in one of the four small booths that lined the wall. The comforting smell of hot broth and spices calmed your anxious mind as you closed your eyes to take a deep inhale. You and Spencer talked about some upcoming shoots and how his Baldur's Gate 3 save was going as you waited for the food to arrive. 

 It didn’t take long for Emi, the other owner, to bring out your food, “You two are just the cutest, such a wonderful young couple.” She cooed.

“Oh we’re not-” 

“Thank you Mrs. Ito, that's so sweet, we really love coming here.” You cut Spencer off, smiling at the woman's kindness. She walked off, heading to grab an order for a driver. 

You turned to find Spencer staring at you with an eyebrow slightly raised. “What?” You asked, sipping on the steaming broth.

“So you think we’re the ‘most wonderful young couple’ huh?”

“Of course I do honeybun.” You jested, leaning over the table and tapping Spencer's cheek sarcastically. Resuming your meal as Spencer rolls his eyes.

The rest of your lunch is pleasant, filled with chatter about everything yet nothing. You tried to pay for your lunch when Mrs. Ito brings the bill but Spencer insists on covering it since he wanted to take you to lunch to distract you. 

“Thank you spence, I really needed that.” You said, grabbing Spencer’s hand in thanks as you walked back into the office. 

He squeezed your hand lightly, “I always know what you need.” And he did, Spencer was a consistent support system for you, had been since you began at Smosh. Beginning as an editor you worked with Spencer a lot. Your friendship blossomed over a shared love of movies and games. 

Over the years you got closer and closer until you were unequivocally best friends. Weekly movie nights, breakfast, lunch, and dinner dates solidified that years ago. Now there’s hardly any time you spend without each other. 

You walked hand in hand to the conference room, ready for the games meeting now that your head was clear.

[theskit]

Stickers AU

Important!!!

On the mobile app, direct linking gets rid of the readmore cuts!

If you came here via direct link, or wish to use the direct links to another part of the story, and DO NOT want to spoil the surprise stickers, please click on my blog name to go to the actual post after using the link.

Also, due to the apparent shadow banning of people with long tag lists, I will make a master post that people can subscribe to for updates.

Part 10

Master Post

《Prev

Red Hood and Nightwing coming to the cave on Sunday night with tales of their own encounters with the sticker kid had unfortunately not given them as much to work with as Tim had hoped.

Jason was tagging along more to hear about their encounters and to see the rest of the stickers than providing much in the way of evidence himself, what with having his helmet cams and comms shorted out for the duration of his encounter and not bringing his own sticker with him.

There was some friction when Batman and Robin made it back to the cave, it being a fairly slow evening for Gotham with no sign of the kid, which made sense if he'd gone all the way to Bludhaven to bother Nightwing.

Bruce had wanted to compile all the evidence together, and while Dick had been obliging, after they'd gotten the frankly hilarious sticker off of him, Jason had promptly refused to hand his over. Much like Damian, he'd claimed it as his own and would hear nothing else about it, only providing a picture of it after a lot of coaxing from Dick.

The corrupted audio/video file had also been less than helpful. Besides a flurry of green-tinted gray static snow and laughter so distorted it almost sounded like screaming, there was nothing else recoverable.

The sheer degradation of the files was actually impressive. That was either very good tech, or a very strong meta ability. Either way, they needed to find this kid and figure out what was up with him.

Dick at least had managed to both lay eyes on and semi-converse with the kid, though that was also bringing up questions. Such as: how did he get out of a dead-end alleyway? Which, while similar to the disappearing acts he'd pulled in Gotham, those had at least been on rooftops with clear, if possibly inadvisable, access to escape routes all around. As well as the question on why the kid was wearing a blood stained hoodie.

Yes, they had figured he'd injured himself to some degree last night, but why hadn't he changed out of those clothes? Did he not have access to more? Was the kid in a bad living situation here in Gotham instead of having come in with the rest of the out of towners for the ghost hunting convention and the stickers were something unconnected to him that he'd somehow gotten ahold of?

If that was the case, they might be looking at some sort of meta trafficking escapee, since the boy's accent very much labeled him as not a native Gothamite and most people would not move here with a meta ability with Batman's supposed dislike of metas in Gotham. A stance Bruce had taken more to discourage metas from possibly getting targeted by the revolving door of Gotham's Rouge gallery than any real prejudice.

Despite everything, the convention was still their best lead, so it was decided they would go investigate as civilians tomorrow for the last half-day it would be held and try to find more clues.

The description of a short, young male, with blue eyes and dark hair, an echoey voice, possibly still wearing a bloodstained hoodie, was not a lot go to off of in a crowd of hundreds. Maybe they would get lucky and find where the stickers came from, which might give them more of a lead.

Bruce was reconsidering the effectiveness of coming to the convention as Brucie Wayne instead of the small time criminal Matches Malone, regardless of how that may have effected that alias, as he was accosted by another non-gothamite.

Bruce had forgotten how those outside of Gotham tended to act around celebrities. People native to Gotham usually had a strong mind-your-own-business attitude regardless of where on the social scale they happened to fall.

Smiling for yet another photo, Bruce hoped his slightly-less-widely-recognized children were having more luck moving around the convention to check for leads, having abandoned him to fend for himself after the third photo ambush.

Coming on the last half-day might have also been a miscalculation, even if they hadn't had much of a choice with the timing, as it seemed to make people even bolder, knowing they would leave the city in a few short hours.

Dick was having fun roaming around the convention. Seeing all the booths set up with either crystals, tarot cards and other mystical odds and ends or EMF meters, magnetic field detectors and more scientific equipment for ghost hunting.

It all mostly went over his head, but it was interesting to talk with different people and hear all the differing accounts and history, both historical and personal, behind their choice of what equipment or mystical dodad worked best.

He'd even seen a few people cosplaying as The Ghost Busters, and he swore he'd seen a couple in full hazmat suits for a moment before he lost them in the crowd.

He had forgotten how interesting conventions could be when they weren't constantly crashed by Rogues. Dick would have to try and find time to go to more of them. The eccentricities on display reminded him fondly of all the different personalities you could find in a circus.

Damian scowled as he made his way through the crowds. This was ridiculous. There was no practical use for most of the things displayed in the various booths, as most wardings against Pit demons needed to be cast by those with magical or mystical bloodlines as far as he was aware, and to date there was no known scientific way to capture or quantify Pit demons.

Most of the 'evidence' provided by both sides was also suspect. Generally involving blurry photographs and 'spooky vibes'.

There was also a marked dearth of younger people in the crowds. Mostly consisting of small children accompanying their parents with few teenagers, such as a redhead female approximately his age he'd spied a time or two due to the eye catching color of her hair, to be seen.

Jason had decided to leave the convention a little early. Despite the fun he had watching Bruce get mobbed by out of towners with his Brucie mask on, something about wandering the crowds was riling up the Pit.

Maybe it was the crowds themselves, all those people blatantly not from Gotham, who *did not belong* here. Or maybe all the talk of death and ghosts and what came after, but *something* had his aggression ramping up out of the blue as he made his way around the convention.

Randomly feeling the need to punch something wasn't exactly new, but the sheer number of times he'd started seeing green out of nowhere was worrying, so he'd called it quits.

He'd check in with Dick later to see if any new leads had been found.

Danny breathed a sigh of relief as Jazz came to collect him. Everything was already packed up in the RV and it was time to grab whatever he wanted for the ride back as their parents wanted to get ahead of the leaving crowd.

He'd been feeling something wandering the convention for the last few hours. Not quite enough to set off his ghost sense, but definitely at least ghostly-adjacent.

He'd been doing his best to navigate away from the feeling any time it drew near, not wanting a fight to break out between him and whatever territorial spirit had decided it was a good idea to haunt ghost hunters.

Hitting up a nearby coffee shop for a hilariously named Deathwish coffee and a pastry for the road, Danny saw a guy wander in, take in the line almost out the door, and nearly fall into a seat instead.

Holding his head in his hands, it looked like the guy was almost nodding off where he sat. Poor dude had eyebags darker than Danny had the time Technus, Skulker, Ember and a swarm of Blob ghosts had all decided the night before a major test was a great time to invade Amity with their shenanigans.

Taking pity, Danny ordered a second coffee, handing it to the guy with a little surprise attached before heading out. Hopefully it would brighten his day a little.

"You look like you could use this."

Tim glanced up from his seat at the coffeeshop table as a younger teen placed a large coffee cup and a few napkins down on the table.

The other boy was out the door before Tim could even fully process that some kind soul had taken pity on him and saved him from having to stand an eternity in line before getting his hands on the much needed caffeine.

Blessing whoever it was silently, Tim took a large swallow, closing his eyes a moment as the strong coffee helped kick his brain back into gear. Ahh, Deathwish, my beloved, hallowed be thy beans.

Standing up, he grabbed the couple of napkins to take with him, feeling an odd stiffness to them. Shifting the top napkin out of the way, Tim boggled at the sticker staring back at him for a moment before bolting out the door.

Looking around frantically, he was just in time to see the boy on the other side of the road, getting into a frankly absurdly proportioned vehicle before it sped down the street, barely keeping from sideswiping at least three other cars before careening around a corner and out of sight.

Well, he thought as he glanced from the sticker to where the vehicle had disappeared, at least something that... distinctive, should be easy to track down...

@mygood-bitch99 @stargazer-luna @easily-broken-by-emotion @dolfay @britcision @cyber-geist @is-this-even-relatable @alcorbearson @fisticuffsatapplebees @thegatorsgoose @my-mom-calls-me-rat @some-rotten-nest @crystalqueertea @meira-3919 @wandererofthestars @seraphinedemort @bjurnberg @blep-23 @stargirl1331 @bianca-hooks123 @addie-lover-of-stories @pickleking8 @iconicanemone @sarina-elais @mur-ururu @sailor-goddess @dragonfirefeather @nutcase8691 @ravenpainter @liandrin @jaguarthecat @russetfur1128 @purefrickingspite @oakskull @vythika96 @molasses-being-slow @satisfactionbroughtmeback @serasvictoria02 @tkiesai @breesperez139 @dhampir-princess @redhoneysugarorange @gildedphoenix @iglowinggemma28 @f4nd0m-fun @therandomartmaker @mandyne-1001 @learning-to-fly-on-my-own @solarisaetherlumine @zeldomnyo

[zairene]

earth 42! miles morales as a streamer headcanons

warnings: none but fluff

a/n: aight had to whip this out of the drafts since my LAST miles post got a community label. + i wasn’t too proud of it anyways so i just took it down. </3 i’ll probably put it back up once i try to figure out what’s wrong w it though.

miles would most definitely be a gaming and music reaction streamer. he would always be up to date with the newest games but let brent faiyaz drop a new album or something, and he gets RIGHT on it!

you would expect majority of his audience to be girls because of his good looks and nice personality, however he seems to be more appealing to guys since he rages on the games he plays quite a lot. (he is not very fond of mercy players on overwatch and hates winston mains with a passion.)

he has a pretty big fanbase, ranging from around 800k-1M followers on twitch and 500k subscribers on his twitch highlights channel. and the only reason why his following got this huge in only a year’s span is because he went viral on tiktok because of him raging at a game and then his sound became a trend. now most audios on tiktok are from his streams, and honestly he finds it hilarious.

now miles is really private about his life outside of streaming. he’ll answer the basic questions about his age, his race/ethnicity, how many siblings he has and etc. but anything about his relationship status or anything was kept strictly confidential.

that was until one day you walked in his room while streaming. it was a normal stream, he was just talking to chat and answering questions per usual. you had brought him some food since he had since you some money via cash app to do so. you didn’t know he was streaming so you just came and hugged him, even giving him a kiss, and then handed him his food. you didn’t even pay attention to the stream and kept going with your business. he had got so caught up in the moment he hadn’t realized that he was still streaming and his chat was going crazy.

he was shocked to say at the least but he wasn’t mad at you or anything. he was more mad at his chat for trying to spit game at you even though they had saw the whole ordeal. once you were informed that you were dating the miles morales, your social medias, that were once very private, started blowing up with notifications asking you about your relationship with miles.

miles took this opportunity to properly introduce you on his instagram story. about two weeks after the situation happened, he posted a picture with you and him for your 6th month anniversary. the caption saying, “happy 6th month anniversary to my beautiful girlfriend. te amo tanto. <3 @[yourusername]”

and so the news was out. from this point forward, you started to pop up in the streams a little more often and you started to grow this special little friendship with his fanbase. you once just came into his room because you wanted a hug and the entire chat was filled with “AWWW!!! YOU GUYS ARE SO CUTE!!” and “mbn.. 😔💔”s. now not EVERYONE was happy with this situation and some people spread hate comments here and there but because of the overwhelming support of your relationship, miles barely noticed it. the only thing he had on his mind was you and his career.

TAGLIST :: @kisamekiss @kazuminari @planetlunaa @mypimpademia @megurulvr @dreampurpledreams @chinieh @naijagrl @looking4chanel @pixieplush17 @jogeto @laylasbunbunny @jamies-cumslut @sapphicshav @banqnaz @edgyficuselastica

TAGLIST FORM

[going-to-ikea-for-the-fries]

You're feeling ill: COD headcanons

[MY MASTERLIST]

Rating: G Words: 600~ Pairing: none tags: SFW!, fluff, gn!reader, recovering from sickness, comfort. a/n: I'm feeling **so** sick (have a migraine) and decided to write these while waiting for my sleep aids to kick in.

Ghost: He's very caretaking-oriented and less so comforting. Clogged nose? He gets you a nasal spray and tissues. Hungry? Have some soup. Nauseous? Tea and saltines. Migraine? Turns off the lights and tells you to sleep. It sucks if you wanna cuddle and bask in his warmth because he will make you have the bed all for yourself so you can get better. Nonetheless, he's very efficient at taking care of you.

Price: This man is chronically sick. Not a day goes by where he's not nauseous or got a headache. (He joked about it in MW3, but frankly sounds accurate considering his high-stress job). This means that his perspective is a bit skewed. Will probably ask you "Are you sick enough that it's affecting your ability to work/study?" and when you say yes, will make sure to get you to bed and put a few meds, tissues, water bottles within your reach. Probably won't cuddle or coddle you, but will check in on you periodically and tuck you into bed with forehead kisses and words of encouragement.

Soap: (Is probably the reason you're sick in the first place) Will be miserable with you in bed. Everytime you sniffle or complain, he'll be right there with you, holding you close and grumbling "I ken, bonnie lass" in your ear. Will likely be all over you, hesitant to leave your side for longer than to get you things you need. Doesn't mind that you're sweaty/feverish/weak, he's rubbing himself on you like a puppy that's trying to lick you better.

Gaz: The man is a saint. He'll wrap his arms around you and kiss your forehead and rock you a little bit side to side until you fall asleep on top of him. Won't even complain about your bad breath when you have to mouthbreathe because of your clogged nose. Won't complain when you need to be away because you're overheating. Won't complain when you need all the lights off or the room to be cold either.

Alejandro: Remembers all the home remedies his mama used to use when he was little. 7Up for upset tummies, Caldo de Pollo for colds, loads of herbal tea, and Vicks VapoRub for literally any and every ailment. Will also hold you close, probably sit by your side and hold your hand and kiss the back of it while you groggily complain about how bad you feel.

Rodolfo: Also uses home remedies ^ but is a lot more likely to rush off to the pharmacy (even if it's the middle of the night!) to get you actual medication, especially when you're complaining about something specific like a headache or sore muscles. Will bathe you if you have a fever and feel gross and sweaty. Will spoon you from behind and play with your hair until you doze off.

Graves: Will let you groan and huff about how sick you feel. Probably teases you a bit when your voice gets nasally or hoarse, but will proceed to take care of you. Also whenever you get light-headed, he finds it to be hilarious. He parks you on the living room couch with blankets and pillows, tells you to tell him what you need and gets it for you. Also purposely makes you take copious amounts of Nyquil to knock you out.

König: Subscribes to the German (yes, I know he's Austrian) way of thinking that fresh air (and water) fixes everything!. Your head hurts? "Here, drink Wasser". You have a fever? "You need Lüften, I will open the window". You have cramps/nausea? "You need fresh air. Let's go for a walk. It will make you teel better." He means well and, granted, most of it works!! But my God, man, you don't want to go for a 3km hike when you feel like you're going to vomit.

[mermaid886]

I really hope I can say this without sounding salty.

I’ve written for almost six years under this pseud and have always updated every Saturday on the dot, through covid, through agony and the major surgery that followed, the death of two loved ones, etc.

I have some lovely folks who comment, some who even comment every chapter, and for that, I’m extremely grateful.

This past Saturday it finally happened, I missed an update.

I did, I missed it.

For the past two months, I’ve been working 60-70 hour weeks to try and better my husband and I financially at my dream job and to be honest, I was too tired to deal with forcing chapters out that would be subpar anyway.

What I noticed was several comments asking when the next chapter was coming from folks I’ve never heard from before, lol.

Not asking how I was as a person or if I was ok, by the way, just “update when?!?!” And “next chapter please”.

I hope this post serves as a reminder to everyone who reads that behind each fic is an actual human behind who donates their time to write your favorite story for……perhaps some comments.

My most successful story has over 1000 subscribers on AO3, I usually get 2-3 comments a chapter.

(……..Keep in mind that’s considered a fairly high number or so I’ve been told.)

The author’s writing time is spent away from their loved ones, away from relaxation, away from other hobbies/chores, etc.

Fic writing is work, trust me, it’s work.

Fic writers are expected to give these hours away and yet are viewed as needy when they want comments or get deflated by lack of engagement.

I am grateful for every comment and for each one of my wonderful readers, I’m also grateful people have some interest in my stories, but I think it’s hilarious that while some folks have no intention of ever engaging with the plot or encouraging the writer, as soon as those free drinks aren’t refilled, they’ll start making noise lol.

[real-life-senshi]

SAILOR SENSHI 20TH ANNIVERSARY ALUMNI REUNION ~ BEHIND THE SCENES (FANSUBBED)

I decided to sub the whole video, including Miyuu's message before and after the behind-the-scene clips because of how heartfelt and candidly hilarious she is when speaking about their group dynamic.

Some notes & disclaimer:

1. I’m not a fluent Japanese speaker, but I do know Hiragana, Katakana, basic Japanese grammar and kanji, and a few good tools to use for translation. All’s to say, all mistakes are mine. Sorry if there’s any!

2. I’m also not a professional translator. Due to the grammar differences between Japanese and English, some sentences will sound awkward in English for the conversation to make sense.

3. Miyuu's message post-video seems unscripted, so her sentences were quite choppy and sometimes she changed trajectory mid-way. I tried to capture the essence of her words as best as possible, but it was easier to replicate the gist of her message instead of translating word-for-word. Because of this, some nuances may seem mistranslated or lost in translation. Sorry!

4. If you have a YouTube account, please give your Likes and Comments to Miyuu and subscribe to her channel, not this video or my channel! I have no wish to piggyback on Miyuu's hard work, I merely want more people to understand and appreciate what she shared!

---

As much as I enjoyed and laughed when I watched and subbed the TV program because of what they said, seeing the ladies goofing around in the behind-the-scene clip made me involuntarily smile with warmth in my heart. <3 And it's absolutely crazy how tough of a time they had trying to take a group selfie, despite the many photos they've taken already from their Senshi Reunions. lol

The video is again Unlisted, so can only be accessed via the proper link.

PLEASE ENJOY, REBLOG AND SHARE! 🌙

To watch the fansubbed version of the Alumni Reunion program itself, please see here.

[sigridstumb]

Get out of my own way

There's a phrase that is new-ish to therapy models, one that I look at entirely askance because what is now termed "pathological demand avoidance" is what I have spent my life knowing as "self-sabotaging dumbass." In most of my life, I manage to avoid being a self-sabotaging dumbass. But in one area, that of cultural trends, it sometimes sets in. Usually to my loss and detriment.

It's just that, when I am barraged with a whole bunch of people all loving a thing at the same time (Tumblr amplifies this a LOT) it *irritates* me. This is asinine, and it makes ME the asshole were I to voice it, because oh my god, Sigrid, people love what they love! Do not squash joy in this parlous existence! But internally I resolve to never watch or read or listen to the thing in question.

Why? I dunno, because sometimes I am a self-sabotaging dumbass!

At any rate, after months of being vaguely irritated with the INTENSE love people have for Dimension 20 (it's not you! It's me! I have a problem! You go on and keep loving the shit out of what you love!) I finally saw a TikTok clip of the show Game Changer. And Brennan Lee Mulligan was hilarious and brilliant.

So, I sought out the show, Game Changer. Spouse and I both really enjoy it, and agree that Brennan is our favorite. I figure out that to watch more episodes, I should subscribe to Dropout.tv. I do, and suddenly realize that Brennan Lee Mulligan is that guy from Dimension 20 that everyone loses their goddamn minds over.

Oh. Oh!

I, with a sense of letting down some internal moral code and a pervasive feeling that I am doing something shameful, watch the first episode of Dimension 20: Fantasy High. It is, as literally everyone (not literally, obviously) already knows, very very good.

I am hooked! I have become One Of Those People! And, Sigrid, the only thing keeping you from enjoying this all along was your own self-sabotaging dumbassery!! Argh!!

ANYWAY.

For those of you who do not know, you are one of Today's Lucky 10,000.

Firstly, Dropout.tv is a comedy troupe formed out of the wreckage of College Humor when it imploded. There is a core group of, I'm not sure, 12-20 people, and they invite guests. The group does a variety of different web tv shows, some of them game shows, some skit comedy, and a great deal of table-top role playing game based improvisational theater. The members are actors, impressionists, writers, voice actors, musicians, and very skilled improv comedians.

Dimension 20 is the umbrella name for the 30-ish different TTRPG campaigns they have filmed. They play in different genres, there are a handful of GMs (though Brennan does a LOT of them,) and the player group composition shifts around a lot. In later seasons, there are nerd celebrity guests.

We, the viewer, are watching people play AD&D 5th edition. That's it, that's the show.

Except it is not at all the show! Here are some points I was not expecting:

- The production values are great. The props, the miniatures, the sound effects, the models of the combat areas, it's all great. It's the dream TTRPG set-up of my teenage years. - The people are voice actors. They are fantastic. They inhabit their characters, and it is fantastic to watch. Also, Brennan Lee Mulligan as GM does all the non-player characters. He does voices for ALL of them. - These people are all IMPROV COMEDIANS. Whatever the others say, they roll with it. Unexpected things happen constantly, both because of the dice rolls and also just because players are unpredictable, and everyone picks up the event and carries on. - They are actually playing a game, so much of what happens in controlled by rolls of dice. And everyone is pretty damn good about this. They make it work, they make the plot continue, using whatever the dice has given them to work with. They are SO much better at it than any of the gaming groups I was in! - The episodes I have seen so far are all good-natured in vibe. The people playing want everyone to have fun. They want the GM to have fun, the players to have fun, and the audience to have fun. There's no sniping except in the most friendly way, there's no sulking about bad rolls, there's no vibe-kills that I have seen.

Anyway, if you like improv comedy, if you like voice actors performing SF/F plays live, if you like other people's TTRPGs, Dimension 20 might also be for you.

[arc-misadventures]

Horror Games

Jaune was a streamer, going by the name: Crescent Knight. And, today he was playing a relaxing game of, ‘Shadows of Doubt.’

Jaune: Okay… Fingerprints collected. Addresses collected. Any, and all information on the victim has been collected, and yet we have no clue who murdered this poor sod.

GoldenDragon: It was the butler!

RedReaper: No, it was the maid!

Jaune: I don’t think there is a maid, or a butler character in the game. You two.

GoldenDragon: I can dream, Harold!

Jaune: Hehe~! That you can. Ahh, my characters hungry. Lets see, what we should have today…?

TeaLotus: Noodles.

ThunderThighs: Pancakes!

Jaune: There are no pancakes, ThunderThighs, sorry.

ThunderThighs: WHAT?!!

ThunderThighs: This game sucks!

Jaune: Hehehe. What is with you, and your weird obsession with pancakes?

Jaune: Let’s see… 147th street…?!

A howling cry soon emanates form his speakers, causing, Jaune to look at the chat feed.

Jaune: Hey, thanks, GoddessofVictory for subscribing for…? (Whistles~!) Whoa… 14 months! Thank you! And, you sent me a message too…Let’s see… “Crescent, have you decided to do anymore collab streams with any other streamers soon?” Collab streams, eh? Well, Emerald Guardian, and I are planning on playing a few games later, but we need a few more people to play before we can do that. So… Maybe, hopefully soon.

ShadowNinja: Oh! Are you two going to be crossing swords soon~?

Jaune: Hilarious, Ninja, absolutely hilarious…

ShadowNinja: Let me enjoy my otp dammit!

AngelofSnow: We know you’re dating, let us enjoy this!

Jaune: Sheesh, can’t you guys get your own love life to be interested in. Not mine you sad, lonely people?

RedReaper: Ouch.

IceCreamShortstack: 🤣🤣🤣🤣

GoldenDragon: That hurts dude.

Jaune: Oh, we…

: AHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

Jaune: …

Jaune: Lamb…?

TeaLotus: Did anyone else hear a scream?

CoffeeAddict: Was that Emerald Guardian?

BunbunBunny: Is she okay?

Jaune: Yeah, that was, Emerald Guardian, chat. She’s playing some sort of horror game.

Jaune: …

Jaune: I don’t think she’s winning…

CoffeeAddict: I don’t think so.

RedReaper: Sounds like she died during a jump scare.

Jaune: Yeah, probably. I don’t understand why she’s playing one of those game. She doesn’t watch horror films, because she can’t handle them, I don’t watch them because I’m bored by them. So, why is she playing those kind of games?!

GoldenDragon: Because it’s fun?

GoddesofVictory: People like to be scared.

Jaune: I know that, but…

(Click)

Jaune: Hmm?

Jaune swiveled in his chair, allow the chat to see the back of his chair as he addressed the new arrival in his room.

Jaune: Jessica? You okay?

ShadowNinja: Oh, are we going to have some juicy Emerald Knight moments!

IceCreamShortstack: 😘😘😘

AngelofSnow: Hell yeah!

Jaune: Do you need…? Hey, what are you… Ooph?!

ThunderThighs: Oohhh~! Sounds like something interesting is happening~!

GoddessofVictory: This should be good!

Jaune: Uhh… You okay?

Jessica: No…

Jaune: Did something scary happen?

Jessica: Yes…

Jaune: Okay… Do you want to stay here for a while then?

Jessica: Please?

Jaune: Stay as long as you want then. Now, lets get back to it.

Jaune swivelled in his chair so he was facing the camera again, and he showed himself sitting in his chair with his girlfriend, Jessica, the Emerald Guardian hugging him tightly, resting her head in the crook of his neck as she sat on him.

GoddessofVictory: OH MY GODS!!!

IceCreamLover: ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

ShadowNinja: YES! All my fantasies are coming true!!!

BunBunBunny: Oh that is so precious!

CoffeeAddict: That’s so fucking adorable!

KnightBat: Hey, has anyone seem, Emerald Knight?

SuperMan: She left her game after that last jump scare.

GoldenDragon: Look for yourself.

RedReaper: ❤️ This is so cute!!! ❤️

AmazonianQueen: OH MY GODS!!! She hugging him like a koala! That is so precious!

Jaune: Hehe~! Ladies, and gentlemen: The benefits of a small girlfriend.

Jaune smiled for the camera before giving his Smol girlfriend a kiss, causing the chat feed to explode with hearts, and happy comments.

Jaune: Alright then, where were we…? Ahh yes. Murder~!

[withacapitalp]

How to Rehabilitate a Jock Part 7

Part One Part Six Part Eight Link to Ao3

Thank you to @stevethehairington for Betaing for me!!! A reminder I'm not adding anyone else to the tag list, be sure to follow or subscribe on ao3 if you want to know when this updates!

-----------Step Seven: Assist Him With His Kids----------

Well, Steve really had to hand it to the kids. 

They sure knew how to scream. 

Right after Eddie’s oh so perfectly timed reveal, the boys had devolved into a full blown raging interrogation. Steve, seeing the writing on the wall, had started walking to the door the second Eddie gave him that little shit eating grin that always spelled trouble. He was already in the hallway by the time the kids turned around to face him. 

Because, as fun as it sounded to get dressed down by four twelve year olds in front of the rest of the group, he thought it might be prudent to skip that bit of public humiliation. 

Sure enough, his kids had scampered into the hall right after him, yelling the entire way. There were accusations left and right, clearly hurt feelings, and Wheeler was once again on a tirade about kicking Steve out of the party. 

It would have been hilarious if Steve wasn’t completely exhausted. If there wasn’t a weird kind of ache starting to build in his chest from Eddie so readily giving him up when he knew what this meant to Steve. 

“I cannot BELIEVE you!” Dustin shouted for about the ten millionth time, throwing his hands up yet again as he glared at Steve, “What is the first rule of the Party? What is it, Steve?!”

“Friends don’t lie,” Steve droned, rubbing at his temple. He had started to get a headache about halfway through the game, and it was turning into a full blown migraine the longer the kids kept screeching at him. 

“Friends don’t lie!” Dustin repeated as Will solemnly shook his head behind him, clearly biting on his lip to hold back a laugh. He and Max both found the whole thing extremely funny going by the glances they kept swapping. 

“Friends don’t lie,” Lucas echoed, tutting and putting his hands on his hips in a perfect imitation of the stance Steve always took with them when they were misbehaving, “So why did you feel it was necessary to lie to us, Steven James Harrington?”

Did this kid seriously just full name him? 

Jesus, he was giving them some bad fucking habits to pick up.  

“It wasn’t a lie-” Steve said, trying once more to explain, but he barely got the start of the sentence out before all of them exploded again, talking all at the same time. 

“Yes it was-”

 “You told us you were ‘shooting hoops’-”

“You kinda did lie, Steve-” 

“This is your own fault-”

“Can we please just kick him out of the Party now?!” 

Mild irritation began to bloom into full on anger as his headache crested over the point of no return. There was a pounding behind Steve’s left eye, an ice pick slowly sliding in and out of the socket. The pain was awful, and Steve wanted to curl up in a ball and just start whining, but he pushed past it, gritting his teeth and setting his jaw. 

Enough was enough. 

Steve gave a short irritated sigh before shaping his thumb and index finger into a U and sticking his fingers in his mouth, pressing down on his tongue and whistling down one excruciatingly loud note. It made his headache so bad that his vision began to blur, but at least all of the kids were quiet, rattled by the sudden shrieking noise. 

Sacrifices, sacrifices. 

“Jesus,” Lucas said, both annoyed and mildly awed. He pinched his own lip and started trying to imitate the motion, seeing if he could recreate Steve’s whistle. 

“Not cool,” Mike pouted, his hands still over his ears. 

“Yeah, you could make a demogorgon go deaf like that,” Dustin added on, Steve reflexively shushing him the second the kid said the word ‘demogorgon’. 

He put his hand over Dustin’s mouth, and all of the kids tensed up, like scared rabbits that had just heard a twig break under the predator’s boot. Steve looked at each of them, hating the way their eyes had widened, hating how scared they were because of the world’s tiniest joke. 

It wasn’t like anyone would know Dustin was talking about an actual demogorgon, but the need for absolute secrecy was pressing. Steve could still feel how his hand cramped while signing the hundreds of NDA’s that had been pushed in his direction, he could still feel the presence of the armed soldiers standing nearby as all of them had been yet again instructed about the importance of maintaining discretion. 

The whole aftermath was almost as terrifying as the actual experience, made worse by the fact that they all now knew what might happen if another person found out about the existence of the Upside Down. 

After all, they had all been forced to lie about how Max found out just to keep Lucas out of federal prison. 

The kid was twelve, and they had threatened to lock him up for thirty years when Max had naively revealed that he told her about what happened last year. They had actually brought the cuffs out and everything until Steve spun some story about Max somehow magically showing up at the junkyard while they were running from the demodogs. 

Lucas hadn’t told her on purpose, he had just explained what they were afterward when Max was freaking out. They had never signed any papers saying they couldn’t talk about the monsters with someone who already knew they existed, so Lucas hadn’t done anything wrong. 

Steve had repeated that story stubbornly over and over, and the kids had followed his direction. He had done what he did best- played dumb. The agents hadn’t really believed Steve, but they had no evidence he was lying, so they had been forced to drop the charges against Lucas before they had ever really been brought up 

It had worked, but Steve didn’t think he was ever going to be able to forget the way the kid had been shaking in his arms the entire time he crafted his tale. Lucas wasn’t the type to get scared like that, but he had been completely terrified that night. They all were, and the ever looming anxiety of someone finding out continued to hang over them. 

Sometimes it felt like it was never going to go away. 

Especially when you considered the fact that they were still being watched. 

All of their phones were still being monitored, and Jonathan had told Steve through passed notes in class that there were still people trailing his car everywhere he went. They were under careful observation every single minute of every single day, and even one little slip would cost everything.

He had no doubt in his mind that the government would make any of his kids disappear if they thought there was even a chance of the truth getting out. 

Steve couldn’t let that happen. He wouldn’t let that happen. 

So he taught them how to hide their secrets, gave the kids specific places they could talk about things when they needed to, and made sure they knew how to shut up everywhere else. 

Nancy and Jonathan could go off all they wanted about justice and making things right. Let them be the ones to risk everything to find the truth. Steve just wanted to keep everyone alive and out of prison. 

Maybe that wasn’t exactly a healthy mindset, but this was survival, and Steve was great at surviving. Besides, it was better overall to make sure that no one else ever got dragged into this hell. 

“Hey, so-” 

A voice spoke up behind Steve, pausing when everyone in the hallway jumped. 

Steve let go of Dustin and flew around, his hand clenching up on nothing as he looked for the bat that he still kept in his trunk. Not here. He didn’t have anything but his fists, and Steve was a shitty fighter when it was just him. 

Whatever, it had to be good enough. Steve stepped forward, making sure all of the kids were behind him before looking up at whoever was threatening them. 

But there was no threat. Just Eddie standing in the doorway, looking at Steve with big worried eyes. 

Steve let out a soft shaking sigh and pinched the bridge of his nose, trying to relieve just a touch of the ache still throbbing against his eyes. One of the kids pressed up against his side silently. Steve could tell which one it was by the height, and the curls brushing against his arm, and he wrapped an arm around Dustin’s shoulders, ruffling the kids hair as he pulled himself back together in a millisecond. 

They needed him to be steady. They needed him to be strong. They needed someone safe, and they didn’t really have anyone but Steve who could be that for them. Nancy and Jonathan were great, but they didn’t really worry so much over the kids who weren’t their actual siblings, and Joyce and Hopper were still trying to sort out everything going on with El. 

That left just Steve, and just Steve needed to do better. The kids deserved better. 

“While it is highly entertaining to listen to you being scolded by kids half your age,” Eddie said, pulling Steve’s focus once more. The boys all groaned at this, clustering around their babysitter as they threw low level glares at Eddie. 

“We’re almost thirteen, dude,” Mike said with a scowl, bumping his shoulder against Steve before leaning into Will’s space like he always did, “And he earned that scolding. As a party member Steve knows we don’t lie to each other.” 

A weird rush of affection washed over Steve and he rolled his eyes, ignoring the way it spiked in his chest. Mike was a lot like a cat. He was prickly, hissed a lot, and had a few special people he favored over everyone else. But, if you took the time, and you gave him the space, and, by some miracle, you gained the patience of an absolute saint, Michael Wheeler could end up being pretty surprising sometimes.  

“We do have to finish the campaign at some point tonight,” Eddie continued as if no one had ever spoken. He gave Steve a gentle look, as if he realized he had stepped into something he probably should have left alone.

“So could you wrap it up soon, Sweetheart?”

Steve’s heart fluttered, but he forced that down. That stupid nickname and the weird feelings that came with it could take a hike. He was still upset with Eddie. 

“Sweetheart?” Max snorted, finally pushing off of the wall she had been leaning against and walking over. She put her chin on Lucas’s shoulder, looking at Steve with a shit eating grin. 

All of the kids were exchanging smirks now, and Steve’s cheeks began to heat up as his stomach dropped. 

Yet another thing that had felt sacred that was no longer hidden, another thing that had felt like it was supposed to belong to just them that Eddie had carelessly given to the rest of the world. It was stupid to get all worked up over a silly nickname that meant nothing, but it was just another reminder that Steve was never going to keep anything in his life intimate ever again. 

Suddenly playing along with the rest of the group felt like a chore, and the joy he had been having from getting to just be a silly kid again was gone. Steve wasn’t the type of person who got to have hidden things anymore, he wasn’t the type of person who got to just be a kid. 

He had kids now, six of them, and they needed someone steady. They needed an adult, not some bullshit artist that wanted to pretend like he could still have a normal life.  

Hell, what if something had happened while he was goofing off with Eddie and the rest? They could have gotten hurt, and if they needed Steve to save them, they wouldn’t have known where to find him. 

His heart was racing again, but not for a good reason. All at once the hallway felt overexposed, the endless rows of empty doors were each a threat, a place where a monster might emerge to swallow them whole. 

This wasn’t a safe place for them, and Steve needed to keep his kids safe.

“Look, Eddie, they’re not gonna shut up about this anytime soon, so I think I just need to take them home,” Steve said, crafting up the perfect reason to want to suddenly bail and take the kids back to his house.

His house was barely any safer than the school. Barb had died there, after all. 

(Steve had killed her there, after all.) 

But at least in his house Steve could carry around his bat and keep all of six of the kids in his eyesight. His brain was already humming as it endlessly counted only five around him, knowing the sixth was waiting patiently on his couch, alone in his unsafe house watching soap operas and whatever movies he had on VHS for her. 

“Are you sure?” Eddie asked, a tiny frown ruining his face, “We could maybe wait until we get back from break?”

“No it’s- it’s fine,” Steve said, thoroughly disappointed and unable to keep it out of his tone. 

He didn’t want to make them wait, because Steve wasn’t even sure he ever wanted to go back to Hellfire after this. He didn’t feel like he belonged there anymore, and he had barely felt like he belonged there in the first place. 

The only reason he had kept trying was Eddie and their budding friendship. The inadvertent betrayal of spilling the one thing that belonged to only Steve had marred that. 

“You guys can keep going without-”

“No!”

The shout from his side dragged Steve out of his morose moment, stopping his words in their tracks.

Will was staring up at him with determination set in every one of his features. Actually all the kids were looking at him with the same thing. Lucas’s hands were back on his hips and even Max seemed like she was prepping for a fight. 

“Steve,” Mike groaned, shaking his head, “You don’t abandon your party halfway through a quest,” 

Steve blinked, trying to wrap his mind around the complete one eighty that had just been pulled. They had just spent the last twenty minutes yelling at him for playing DnD without him…and now they wanted him to play DnD without them? 

He couldn’t make sense of it no matter how hard he tried. 

“Well I wouldn’t be abandoning them if you guys would just stop yelling at me,” Steve finally sputtered out, unable to explain all of the other reasons he didn’t really feel like participating anymore. 

The kids narrowed their eyes before quickly pulling away, walking a short distance down the hallway and putting their heads together in a huddle as they quietly debated with harsh whispers. 

Steve let loose another long breath as they argued with each other, scrubbing his hands over his face and mentally begging God to take away the pain still stabbing behind his eyes. He would give almost anything just for it to stop. 

“Hi,” Eddie whispered, forcing Steve to look up. He had sidled up closer, standing next to Steve now and a little ways away from the door. He was giving him one of those easy smiles, the kind that Steve had started to think were just for him. 

It hurt to see it. It hurt almost as much as his migraine. 

“Hey,” Steve replied shortly, unable to pretend that he was okay just yet. He would get there, but he needed more time to stuff down whatever hurt feelings wanted to rise up every time he saw Eddie. 

Eddie’s face dropped as his shoulders drooped. Steve had never really been all that good at hiding when he was upset, and he knew that Eddie knew he really wasn’t happy with how this had all turned out. 

“Listen, Steve, I-”

Eddie was interrupted as the kids returned, standing in front of Steve with their arms crossed over their chests. He walked away from Eddie and towards the group, glad to not have to cross that particular bridge just yet. 

“Fine. No more yelling, but we’re still really mad at you,” Mike stated, clearly being chosen as the one to lead the discussion. 

They had it wrong though. It wasn’t just mad. If the kids were just mad, then Steve would roll his eyes and move on. They were angry brats who got mad at just about everything. 

No, the real problem was that they were hurt. He could see it in their eyes, and the little frowns on their faces. They didn’t understand why he would play with ‘strangers’ and not with them, and that kind of rejection would hurt coming from anyone. Even Max seemed kind of put out, and that simply wouldn’t do. 

“Okay. Come here, and shut up as I say this once and only once.” Steve said, not exactly crouching down because that would just annoy them, but leaning so he was closer to their height. 

“I’m sorry that I lied to you. I shouldn’t have done that. I just wanted to have one thing that was mine. I love you brats, but you’re nosey as shit-”

“Weird way to apologize,” Will commented lightly, already seeming happier, and Steve chuckled. Will was quite the smart aleck when he finally got comfortable. 

“-and,” Steve emphasized, needing to explain a bit more, “I wanted to figure out if I actually liked this before I got all your expectations up that I was going to start playing with you or something,” 

It was clear he wasn’t a hundred percent forgiven, but they were starting to defrost, warmed up by the thought of getting to play their favorite game with their babysitter instead of just having him watch from the sidelines. 

“So, if you all ever decide to forgive me, I think we should definitely all play together sometime.” Steve concluded, some of his nerves settling as the boys began to exchange eager grins. 

“We accept on a few conditions,” Max said, taking point. She would not be swayed by an offer of game play, and she clearly wanted to get something for herself out of this. 

Damn his kids, they were too smart for their own good. 

“Lay them on me,” Steve said. 

“We get to get McDonalds whenever we want for the next month,” Max shot back. 

“Deal,” Steve agreed easily, mentally calculating how much he was going to have to scrap and save. He had already gotten all of his Christmas shopping done, and his parents had just sent him a check for the holidays since he was fourteen, so money wasn’t going to be a problem. 

“And, we want you to rent whatever movie we want at the video store next time. No questions asked,” Dustin tacked on. 

If it was any other group, Steve might’ve worried that they wanted something really bad, but he knew these guys. They just wanted him to get them some cheap horror flick that they were going to turn off the second it got too scary. There would be some long nights in his future as he stayed up with them through any potential nightmares, but it would be doable. 

“Fine,” Steve sighed, really making a show of acting like this was a big thing to give. If he made it seem like he was already pushing the limit of what he would give them, he might curb any truly outlandish asks that might be coming, “Anything else?”

“We want you to ask if we can watch the campaign?” Lucas asked sheepishly, uncharacteristically shy. The rest of the boys seemed to be pretty embarrassed too, and a smile curled on Steve’s lip. 

No matter how mature they acted, they really were just kids. 

“Well, Game master?” Steve said, turning to face Eddie, unexpected olive branch in hand. 

“Dungeon master,” Dustin groaned behind him, muttering under his breath. Steve shook his head and raised a brow towards Eddie. 

“What do you say, Babydoll?” He asked softly, drinking in the way Eddie sucked in a breath and let out an undignified squeak as his ears turned deep red. 

Babydoll. 

What was Steve thinking? 

It was the most ridiculous pet name Steve could make up on the fly. He had only ever heard someone be called ‘Babydoll’ in chick flicks or movies from the 50s, never something serious. He had figured that two could play at this game, and if Eddie wanted to make Steve squirm, then Steve felt no qualms in making Eddie squirm right back. 

But something about it just felt inexplicably right in his mouth. It came out closer to a pet name then something teasing. The kind of thing Steve would say on a date, or in bed after- 

Nope. Not that thought. Never that thought. A fire burned in Steve’s belly and he resisted the urge to hide his face away.  

“You’ll be the death of me, Steve Harrington,” Eddie said, laughing incredulously as one of his signature feral grins lit up his face, “You really will,” 

“Is that a yes?” Mike asked eagerly, all of the boys practically vibrating where they stood.

“C’mon, newly minted junior members of Hellfire. We have a killer Claus to defeat,” Eddie declared, clapping his hands. 

The boys cheered, rushing into the room. Lucas grabbed Max’s hand to drag her in with them, leaving Steve and Eddie alone outside. When he went to follow, Eddie touched his upper arm, stopping Steve in his tracks. 

“Hey. I’m…sorry,” Eddie forced out, dropping his hand away from Steve and nervously wrapping his fingers in his curls as he continued to murmur, barely audible, “I didn’t want everyone to think that you were trying to hide that you knew us, but I shouldn’t’ve done it that way. I know you wanted this to be just yours.”

The acknowledgement of what had been lost melted whatever icy wall might have been left between them, and Steve nudged their shoulders together, silently accepting the apology. Eddie peeked up at him from behind his hair, and Steve felt his stomach flip. 

Nope. Steve had to take it back, put this whole thing back in his control. 

“I think I miiiiiight just find it in me to forgive you. Depending on if you let Santa brutally murder Ex-Prince Stefan,” Steve said in a teasing tone, relishing the way Eddie’s mood immediately bounced up again. 

“Well let’s go find out, Sweetheart,” Eddie practically crooned. Steve snorted and held his arm out. 

“Lead the way, Babydoll,” He challenged, just to see what Eddie might do. 

Sure enough, the older boy violently blushed again, pushing past Steve as he blustered and stammered and pretended he wasn’t at all affected by the fake flirting. Steve smirked, quickly following after. 

Oh yeah, this was going to be fun. 

Tag List: @paopaupaus @zerokrox-blog @surferboyzaza @whatever-is-a-good-name @minjintea @addelyin @5ammi90 @hagbaby420 @shinekocreator @bornonthesavage @starxlark @electrick-marionnett @resident-gay-bitch @ash-a-confused-enby @classicdinosaurdeathpose @valon-whomsttf @rotten-lil-goblin @thereindeerlady @love-ya-kash @kerlypride @sparkle-fiend @thefreakandthehair @flowercrowngods @milf-harrington @sadcanadianwinter @gothbat99 @hotcocoaharrington @henderdads @lightwoodbanethings @colorful565 @h0n3y-dw @craterbbox @sourw0lfs @lesliiieeeee @bidisastersworld @tinynebula @ravnlinn @bonescaro @mexmatch @cottagecoredreams @joruni @hellykelly @maegan1116 @farewell-wanderlvst @desertfern @due-to-the-fact-that-im-a-slut @anythingforourmoonyedits @eerielake @fandemonium-takes-its-toll @sidekick-hero

[hearteyeshayley]

Hey !! How are you ? I hope you're well :)

So I'm kinda new to DC and I really wanna get into Batfamily but I don't know how ? Like, I literally don't understand how Bruce has so many kids but also idc about logistics I just want to consume angsty found family and get obsessed over at least one character and get gender envy yk ?

Okay so basically, do you have any batfam fic recommendations for any1 just getting into batfam ?Or just your fav batfam fics ? I'd really appreciate any recs but if not no sweat !!!

thanks a million for reading and take care !! <3

<3 this is easily my favorite ask I've ever received!

I was the same way with the batfamily for so long, like every time Wayne Family Adventures would trend on Tumblr I'd be like why are there so many black haired boys??? Is one named Dick?

I'd definitely recommend reading Wayne Family Adventures on Webtoon but as for fic recs here are my top 7 batfam fics of all time, plus one wip that's less batfam, more timkon, but simply must be ranked.

Yesterday's Voices by Lemonadegarden... this was the fic that got me really into the fun but heartbreaking family dynamics. Also Tim plays a minor role, but this was the first time I was like, I need to know more about this guy. A quick summary: Batman gets amnesia and doesn't remember the last five years, or the recent death in the family, and the angst hits so hard.

exactly how this grace thing works by irnan... this is by far the best de-aged fic I've ever read. Dick, the oldest sibling, suddenly becomes the youngest and it's such a brilliant character analysis. And I'm always a fan of Dick Grayson getting the love and appreciation he deserves.

The Study of Birds by Maskoftheray… this one focuses on the sibling dynamics, mainly between Tim, Damian, and Dick. It’s hurt/comfort with birdwatching and I haven’t stopped thinking about it since I read it.

Brother Wanted by Vamillepudding... This is an au where a ten year old Tim places an ad in the newspaper for a brother and it's as cute and perfect as it sounds. The Jason and Tim bonding in this is 10/10 and makes all their canon angst that much more devastating

Send to All by Kerosceene... literally funniest fic of all time. I normally hate textfics but this whole story is told through email and it's PERFECT and HILARIOUS 10/10 required reading for batfam vibes at their best

World's Saddest Breakfast Club by motleyfam... this fic includes the whole fam and it's so sweet about it. Jason breaks into the manor and ends up cooking everyone breakfast.

scapegoat by envysparkler... the sibling blame game in this is so real. Basically the family starts blaming Jason for every little thing because Bruce would never get mad at the child he just reconciled with.

And the BONUS timkon fic that's currently being updated

8. buy back the secrets by sundiscus... the only fic I'm subscribed to! It's a TimKon fic but the Tim and Jason conversations in chapter two are so perfectly done. I can't recommend it enough!!

[travellingwiththedead]

Ok, watching iwtv s2e2 again and taking notes because everything happening too much:

(Spoilers under read more)

Louis and Armand arguing about who should have made contact first sounds a bit like Louis and his mum arguing about who should have kept in touch, but less angry.

Also Daniel absolutely not buying their domestic bliss charade is hilarious. "Keep selling it"

Ok, on Louis and his photography: How are all your pictures turning out so well? You're taking them at night, free hand, no flash light. I guess for less hurried ones he can, because he's a vampire, just stand very very still, but we see him and Claudia move the camera while taking pictures (or use a way too short exposure time), he's taking pictures on a moving bike. They should all be underexposed or blurry as hell xD

Louis getting nasty when Daniel's questions go places he doesn't like is so good. Three grumpy old men in a penthouse, trying to one up each other.

Love how Claudia is all indecisive about going into Madeleine's shop until someone tells her not to do it, then she immediately goes in. Lestat's daughter, absolutely. They both hear someone say "Lestat/Claudia, no!" and immediately go "Lestat/Claudia yes!" xD

Aaaand now Daniel's hand is shaking again. Guess it's time for another visit from Fareed (give me my mad scientist husbands)

Love Daniel gleefully correcting Rashid (and indirectly Armand) that you're not supposed to be using gloves with old books and documents. Have the writers stolen this from tumblr posts after s1? ;)

Armand, give poor Real Rashid ('it's just Rashid') a raise already xD

Armand, you dramatic shit, making the lights flicker like that when meeting Louis

The whole Theatre part is just so good. Ben Daniels gave his all and he's stealing the show. Standing ovations for this man. (and also wishing him so much strength after the loss of his husband, so sad for him)

The whole Annika scene was so intense, the actress is fantastic.

KP (the MVP of production crumbs) and his little knitted hat ^.^

The whole theatre troop looks so good. And the set is great.

Celeste's "Do American vampiresses all wear pastels?" is giving Morticia Addams xD

Daniel calling it all a telenovela, and making sure to have the fitting background music, is hilarious xD he's right and he should say it

Delainey is so pretty when she smiles. And also once again doing so well.

Roget, what do you know? Also I wanna know what else was in that box, apart from the letter (looks like some kind of deeds or other official documents? maybe money?).

And there Louis goes lashing out again. Vicious.

Hm, not sure where this whole scenes puts the Armand-is-Alice-theory (which I don't subscribe to). Because Louis clearly thinks Alice as an actual person and that he could find her in present day.

Personally I think Daniel remembering 70s Armand here has less to do with Alice and more with Louis now and Armand then using his memories as weapons against him.

I bet Daniel will make them pay for this in the future, he's not just gonna take that. I mean, he sees nothing wrong with slapping a vampire so collecting himself and then striking back even harder would definitely be something he'd do.

the preview for next episode is confusing me. 1576??? But yay for past-Lestat and Nicki ^^

[sorcerous-caress]

Oooh I made a human Durge priestess of lolth in one of my playthrough ( unhinged I know). Could u do companions reactions to that

I don’t know what why but human priest / priestess of lolth who actually received blessings / favor from her sounds funny as hell

— RED Anon

That concept is so wild anon, bless your Durge.

Like not only they abandoned their father, a whole god of murder, and went to worship Lolth instead. But also them being a human who just subscribed to Lolth's agenda and she found it so hilarious that she granted them a priestess blessings, A PRIESTESS OF LOLTH.

Drow noble women start whole fights just to get this position.

Companions reaction would be something like:

"...why? Just why?" // Gale, Wyll.

They're mostly confused. You were supposed to be a human team and all of that. Gale is especially a hypocrite by mansplaining how Lolth wants humans as slaves for drows as if you're a naive baby who doesn't know better. Wyll is hoping it's a phase, and you'll see the light eventually.

Doesn't care much, you do you // Laezel, Karlach.

Laezel doesn't concern herself with the mythology of Faerun. The only queen she cares about is vlaakith. Karlach has seen much worse in hell, so Lolth seems like a lesser evil in comparison. She knows to judge you on your actions and not who your boss is.

Suspicious of you // Jaheira, Halsin.

They have a very terrible past with Lolth worshippers. Both of them will keep an eye on you and all of that. Maybe even get jumpy or look at you weirdly whenever you're too nice to them. Most elf groves have a strick "kill drow on sight" policy because of the surface raids.

Although since you're a human, they'll mostly think you're just in need of guidance and your misdeeds will be easily forgiven and overlooked because they think you don't know better.

That is so fucking funny but also stay away // Astarion

You know he always thought he'd make such an amazing drow, besides the whole matriarchy and using men as slaves thing. If he looks past it, he really is fascinated by them. Also it's hilarious that you were such a traitor to both your god father and your own race, Ha.

But also don't bite his head off, he knows that Lolth demands high elves as sacrifices for her so don't even think about coming his way.

Fuck you, your goddess is shit // Shadowheart

While Lolth and Shar don't have much beef between each other, their followers definitely do. Their domians overlap a lot, so followers will occasionally migrate from one goddess to the other. Viconia herself used to follow Lolth before and now despises her after Lolth retracted her blessing from Viconia's house and made them fall as a noble house. That's when she found Shar.

I believe she will teach that hatred into Shadowheart.

Minthara

It's complicated. She abandoned Lolth but she is still a paladin who swore and oath to her. And Lolth doesn't seem to have abandoned her just yet.

Lolth sees drows as her property, her toys. She doesn't care for what they personally think or feel. She plays with them and wagers their lives like it's nothing.

Minthara knows the only reason Lolth still grants her power is because she finds it amusing, she is toying with her. Lolth adores chaos and Minthara is a great tool to cause it.

When she meets you, she will think you're another one of Lolth's toys. Either sent to entice her back into the spider queen's embrace and seduce her. Or you're also a victim of her cruelty.

Yet she is curious, you're not a drow, you're a human. That is unheard of. So you fully chose Lolth by your own free will? She honestly doesn't know what to think. She both is annoyed and fascinated by you.

You represent the past life she escaped from, but you also represent the new beginning you granted her by saving her. Deep down she thinks if you stealing her heart is just Lolth stringing you like a puppet.

Also, Lolth can possess any of her priestesses at will, so she can simply come down to have a chat with Minthara through you if she felt like it. And that does put Minthara on edge.

[thewitchandtheassassin]

The Dumbass Award Goes To... (Yelena Belova x Reader)

Summary: Reader makes a mistake... and pays the price :)

Words: 1485

Warnings: Language? Pranks.

Taglist: @natasharomanoffswife​ @natasha-danvers​ @aaron-despair​​ @username23345 @xjiasx​ @nowthisisliving27 @higherfurther-romanova​ @summergeezburr @marvels-writings @imnotasuperhero @miscmarvelwritings @captain-josslett @onlyafewfindtheway @hayleyokami @b-5by5 @lostandsearching @evilcr0ne    @everything201197​

-X-

You should’ve known starting a prank war with your girlfriend – a former assassin turned spy with a sister who was considered one of the greatest spies of all time – was a terrible plan but your love for walking the line between dangerously stupid and harmless negligence overruled the little voice in your head.

The same voice reminding you why was going to end badly, fabricating a mental PowerPoint of every single way this could blow up in your face. But you were notoriously famous for ignoring the concerns presented to you…

Why would this be any different?

-X-

Prank One:

Tucked into the passenger seat of Yelena’s car, you hummed absently as the bright New York lights blurred around you. Fond of the new Charger her sister had procured for her, she’d been driving everywhere recently (which, to be fair, you didn’t mind because being a passenger was far more enjoyable than being tasked with keeping you both alive) so you were simply studying the city that never seemed to truly sleep.

Your hums fell quiet as an odd noise reached your ears, watching Yelena perk up at the unexpected sound from the corner of your eye. It was subtle but grew louder as the car picked up speed, the strange whistling echoing up from beneath the engine block.

“What the hell?” Yelena mumbled, easing her foot from the gas. It became softer, but it was still evidently there. “This cannot be happening.”

The noise remained for a mile or two more before the frustrated blonde was pulling into an empty parking lot and throwing the car into park. Hopping out of the car, she was swift in examining the front of her gift. Nothing seemed out of place and all she could hear now was the soft grumble of her engine, but she still crouched down and carefully inspected the space below the hood. She knew to be careful, having disarmed – and planted – plenty of car bombs throughout her time with the Red Room.

You watched with amusement as Yelena popped back into view suddenly, eyes narrowed as she stared at you through the windshield. Clutched tight in her grasp was a metal harmonica, the same one you’d shown her a few days ago after your impromptu shopping trip with Kate, presenting it like a proud penguin offering its mate a stone.

“That was not funny,” she grunted, words muffled by the glass separating you. “Do not mess with my car, malishka.”

Smirking, you shrugged.

I thought it was hilarious.

-X-

Prank Two:

Teeth digging into her lip, Yelena’s brows were furrowed with concentration as deft fingers scribbled notes into the never-ending mound of paperwork settled on her desk. She was pretty certain some of Natasha’s work had “magically” worked its way into hers but as the words began to blend together on the sheet before her, she didn’t really care.

Buzz.

Sighing, Yelena blindly reached for her phone and glanced at the screen. Blinking slowly at the text, she briefly wondered if the paperwork had driven her insane.

Aardvark: an African mammal with a large…

Head tilting in bewilderment, Yelena didn’t know how to react. The message had come from an unknown number, simply a string of six random numbers, as if she’d subscribed to a random service but she couldn’t think of a single reason she’d receive a dictionary definition…?

Setting her phone back down, her attention fell back upon her work but her mind continuously wandered back to the strange message. She doubted it was a trap or a cry for help, but in her line of work, she could never be too sure.

An hour later (a wasted hour, honestly), she finally managed to return her full attention to the report at hand but as she was finishing the longest paragraph of her life…

Buzz.

Her head snapped back in the direction of her phone and she carefully lifted it, both concerned and annoyed by the interruption.

Fortnight: a period of two weeks.

And as another hour past, it happened again…

Shaggy: having or covered with long, rough, and messy hair.

And again…

Carrot: a long, pointed orange root eaten as a vegetable.

Concentration utterly destroyed, Yelena couldn’t stop staring at her phone, completely baffled by the current string of messages arriving hourly. But only minutes later, a different message appeared in the thread and her head slammed onto the desk.

Thank you, Yelena, for subscribing to HourlyDefinitions. Please note that you are subscribed for the next six months to receive hourly definitions from dictionaries around the world. You may change the frequency on our website using your username and password at any time. We hope you enjoy!

“I am going to kill her.”

-X-

Prank Three:

Wiping the sweat from her brow, Yelena stumbled exhaustedly into the kitchen. Training with Natasha always left her aching, her limbs limp and noodle-y (she blamed you for that description). She was planning to half-heartedly conjure up a snack and a drink before venturing into your shared bedroom in hopes of feeding her growling stomach before passing out for an hour or two.

Opening the refrigerator door, she froze. Every single item stationed within the fridge was staring back at her, though a few were lazy and lingering on her feet. There had to be at least a hundred pairs of eyes, each one placed primly on the packaging of food and drink alike.

“How did she get so many googly eyes?!”

-X-

Prank Four:

“…(Y/N), Chewbacca is calling me again. If you do not tell him to stop, I will hunt him down and remove his vocal chords… no, I am not joking.”

Prank Five:

Accepting the letter Natasha had delivered to her from the weekly mail pile sitting mostly untouched in the common area, Yelena rolled her eyes playfully at the structured yet sloppy handwriting scrawled across the envelope. Tony was notorious for sending invitations to his parties despite everyone living within the same confines so it was no surprise to receive yet another one from the billionaire.

Carefully slicing the envelope, Yelena snorted at the ridiculously fancy – albeit boring – front of the invitation. It was simply her name in his awkward scribble and she tugged it from its temporary home. Flipping it open, her smile fell away as her eyes widened in horror.

Glitter rained from the card.

All over the floor.

Of her office.

Blue and pink sparkles glittered about in a waterfall of misery and mess, standing bright against the dark carpet beneath her desk as they fell upon it because of course she’d trusted him and hadn’t thought to stand any other place in the office.

On the invitation, there was a simple: sorry, kid.

That was it. The proverbial straw that broke the camel’s back. If you were hellbent on playing this game with her, so be it. You were her girlfriend but now you were also her enemy.

-X-

Strolling into the kitchen, your mouth began to water at the sweet smell of cooked caramel that wafted throughout the space. Yelena and Wanda were huddled around the prettiest colored apples you’d ever seen, each one shiny with newly dipped caramel. Wanda didn’t often make them but as the weather became colder, she’d occasionally surprise you all with the divine treat.

Yelena often enjoyed cooking with the Sokovian, bonding over trauma and delicious food. She wasn’t a five-star chef by any means but Wanda had taught her plenty over the last few months and you were just happy she was happy.

Catching sight of you, Yelena beamed up at you.

“(Y/N)! You are just in time. Kate Bishop keeps trying to steal the apple I made for you but I have protected it with my life,” she announced proudly, accent thick with glee at the thought of her perfectly crafted gift. “Take it before she does because she has very grabby hands and her sad puppy look is draining.”

Greedily accepting the sweet treat, you carefully lifted the delight to your lips, keeping the wooden skewer holding it upright somewhat secure so it wouldn’t break under the sudden shift. Sinking your teeth through the coating and into the treat, you contentedly chewed the decent chunk you’d managed to secure before your mouth fell open in disgust and betrayal.

Dropping the offending candied ball of lies, you hurried over to the sink, spitting out the remains and desperately attempting to wash the taste from your tongue. You briefly considered pouring soap into your mouth but decided that was too dramatic, even for you.

“What?” Yelena questioned innocently, snagging off a piece of her own apple and munching on it cheerfully. “Do you not like caramel onions?”

Gagging into the sink, you shot your smug girlfriend a weak glare before continuing your quest to rid your mouth of the flavor.

Maybe you should’ve watched that PowerPoint after all.