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#and soap duh
godowoken · 2 years
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,
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saintlesbian · 11 months
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in universe reaction to anna shooting charlotte vs fandom reaction to anna shooting charlotte
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juniepops · 1 year
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I don’t have anything to say about it that other girlies haven’t but that one post complaining about trans women making egg jokes is irritating and I’m sick of seeing it. The one that’s like “"you are a girl, an egg waiting to crack and that’s ok" how about you are a boy and a man” likeeee. So this post isn’t really about egg jokes after all it’s about trans women trying to tell people it’s okay to be trans women. That’s what you think is bad and you think it’s more appropriate to stubbornly reaffirm cis men’s manhood. Good to know
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samuelroukin · 7 months
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to UC anon about Ghost's face: I can kinda imagine him thinking like "I'm bri'ish we're (obviously) everywhere in the UK I'm not memorable" and Soap not just being alright seeing his face on occasion but wanting to genuinely liking it and wanting to stick around for everything? he never thought anyone would think he's special like that
🥺🥺🥺 pls
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yeyinde · 2 years
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I have dreams about Soap, he would be such a tease lmao. I think he would love to like, prank the reader? But like super stupid stuff lmao and just tease them. He tells them one morning over breakfast before the whole team shows up, "aye, I heard you saying my name last night while you were sleeping, what's that about??" And he's totally lying and they're like "I so did not and I know you're lying." But they're terrified because they absolutely DID have a sex dream about soap last night and if he heard it they were going to explode. And Soap can just tell because they're all red in the face and he might have just uncovered something interesting
this is sooo good!! the biggest tease is def Soap! he'd totally suss it out and now you have to deal with 'thinkin'a me, are you, hen?' with those bright eyes and that little grin.
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istherewifiinhell · 1 year
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sooooo in my feelings, inside baseball type shit about new mm turtle show annoucement (oh yeah. just the show itself? been there. 5 stages of grief about it. justice for rise etcetc). cause collectively. the show runners have collectively worked on.... 3 of the 4 turtle cartoon shows (i assume getting someone still in the biz from 87 would be a bit harder lol).
and. like. okay... they are both EXTRORDINARILY accomplished, aside from their turtle priors obviously making them. lol. qualified i guess. BOTH have done things I personally ADORE, in and out of turtle shows. just. I fucking hate the company that is incontrol of the art i love that its completely WITHIN me now. lol. and im just so ready to deal with the bullshit of that yknow.......
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Texting.
Soap: The rookies are shipping us.
Gaz: You and Ghost? Yeah, duh.
Soap: No. All of us.
Gaz: What?
Price: Shipping us where?
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mactavishenjoyer · 5 months
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(wedding planning)
Soap:"your dad? Duh."
Ghost:"He's dead."
Soap:"Oh my fucking god he Is literally right there. I don't care if Price and you got in a fight he's still your dad and I want him in our wedding."
Price:"I- I'm not his dad?"
Soap:
Gaz:"Bullshit."
Roach:"Biggest damn lie I've heard all month."
Soap:"Womp Womp, you're not getting out of the wedding."
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disgustingtwitches · 1 month
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MDNI
Uncommon kinks I think 141 would have (feat. König)
~
Gaz: Quirofilia, the love of hands. Especially manicured hands. Pretty hands getting dirtied by gardening without gloves. Playing the piano with dainty fingers. Long nails squeezing the trigger of a Glock. A light touch running up and down his body. The sting of those pretty nails digging into his back. Soft palms wrapped around his thick shaft, massaging precum over his tip.
Ghost: This one is a little out there, but nebulophilia (sexual arousal when in fog/steam). He likes it really, really thick. Like to the point you can barely see your hand if you held it out in front of you. Likes to make you look for him in the mist. He was always so quiet, always likes to make you jump when he catches you. Then the heaviness of the air in his lungs when he inhales, ugh it just does something to him. The way your skin sticks to each other from the wetness of the air.
Price: Hear me out. Vacuuming. Watching a woman vacuum. Especially in heels. Just the thought of a domestic, hyper feminine woman makes him cream his pants. Especially if it's a part of brat taming. Speaking of brat taming and hyper femininity, he's into corsetry. It doesn't have to be limited to just your waist. He likes to lace up any soft part of you. Likes to tie the laces so tight, your skin seeps out the side and back. He likes to constrict your movement and make you breathe shallow.
Soap: Wrestling, duh. He'll show you some moves to take him down, grab you from behind and make you throw him over your shoulder, kick the back of your knees and make you kneel in front of him, put you in a chokehold with his arms. Loves getting sweaty. Loves the panting. Loves the way you mess up each other's clothes and hair. And then fuck each other's brains out on the mats.
König: Interrogation play. Always one to be in charge. (Of course there's always a safe word but you like to test yourself, see how far he will go and how much you can take.) Tie you up to an uncomfortable wooden chair. Throw cold water on you. Pull your hair. Face slapping. Light choking. Make you genuinely scared. Tie you up in an incredibly uncomfortable position where your arms are tied up behind you and attached to a pipe on the ceiling so you are forced to bend over and stand on your tiptoes. Makes you cry and cry from overstimulation. Always asks you for information you don't know anything about. Then proceeds to fuck the sense out of you, still asking for Intel.
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theohohmoment · 4 months
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I'm going to say something wildly controversial.
*Deep breath*
Eddie Munson does not have soft curly hair.
Now, if your head canon or fanon has Eddie with soft curly hair, you have my full support. Feel free to have Steve Harrington running his fingers through soft brown curls.
BUT
Eddie Munson was a trailer park drug dealing metalhead in the 80s. Chances are he washed his hair with a bar of soap or the cheapest driest shampoo and never went near conditioner, and that was on purpose, he wanted his hair big and wild. He'd follow up with drying his hair upside down, scrunching it up to get some curls, sticking hair gel through the roots, back combing it, and then finally using a stupid amount of hair spray.
His hair would be big and mad and metal.
He probably hacked crazy layers into it with some old kitchen scissors over the trailer sink, driving Wayne up the wall. He was probably banned from lighting up a cigarette for half an hour after finishing his haircare routine due to the amount of hair spray.
And I honestly think that would work so well in fics. Imagine Dustin trying out the Eddie Munson hair routine like he did with Steve's for the snowball dance and Steve's reaction "I said 4 pumps Henderson!" "It's called being metal Steve, duh" or Steve seeing Eddie's actual flat/silky/lightly curled hair for the first time after his first post-upside down shower and getting heart palpations or Eddie convincing Steve to do each other's hair routines and Steve freaking out at the tangles from teasing it.
I just think authentically metal haired Eddie is something we need more of, that's all.
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the-ace-with-spades · 6 months
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So, I imagine that Soap is around 5'11, which is not short at all, even if it seems so if you look at the people he works with.
However, from his whole family, he is the tallest.
His da is 5'8, his brother is 5'9, his sisters are 5'2 and 5'3 and his mam is 5' nothing. To his family, Johnny is not only tall but also overgrown.
(This is also why entering the military was a shock to the system --- Soap was used to being pretty tall if not the tallest person around and then boom, he's smol)
The first time Soap takes Ghost to his family home, he is instantly named a giant. Literally, his mam when she sees him says something along the lines of 'and I thought my boy was a giant' and his da makes the typical joke of 'what does the army feed you?' and one of Soap's sister says she 'woulda climb him like a tree too if she had the chance' and his brother goes all 'was gonna give the fella a shovel talk but I think he's too big too bury by myself any case'. Soap is so embarrassed by them but Ghost is awkwardly shy anytime his height is pointed out.
On top of it, he tries to help Soap's mam in the kitchen (I like to think he likes to cook) and there is the comical image of her, standing there tiny at 5'0 and Ghost towering over her at 6'3 or 6'4 (Soap's not sure, Simon slouches often) and trailing behind her as she orders him around. There's literally a moment when she goes to grab herself a step ladder to reach something on the top shelf and Ghost just stretches his arm a bit and gets it for her. She might or might not ask if he can dust the cobwebs from the corners of the ceilings she can't reach herself. (Ghost dusts the cobwebs, duh, even if Johnny can't snicker at him enough).
Johnny's brother uses Ghost's height to make his kid eat his veggies, 'if you eat your veggies, you're going to grow as tall as him'. Ghost goes along with it.
The kids in general treat him like a walking jungle gym --- especially because he's not only tall but also strong enough to function as a walking jungle gym. One of Soap's nieces who used to love piggyback rides from him now insists Ghost has to be the one because he makes her feel taller than Soap does.
They're supposed to sleep in Soap's childhood bedroom and Soap's da brings in an ottoman and a couple of pillows so Ghost's feet 'don't stick out'. Soap laughs it off until he realizes that Ghost's feet would, in fact, stick out from his tiny double bed if he slept straightened out.
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agoofyannoyancetolaw · 6 months
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consider... Ghost babytrapping reader. It's something some could see Soap or Graves doing, but never Simon.
He's so sly and sneaky, never showing his needs, but when he senses you drifting away, he will slip a pill in your drink when he's sure he's ovulating to ride you till sunset, making sure to milk you dry
a/n: god I love these requests
minors DNI- warnings: baby-trapping duh, trans ghost as well
ghost wasn’t ever going to admit how much he wanted you, how much he needed you in fact. He didn’t want to put into words how he felt- but he knew deep in his gut that you were his, right? You had to be his in some way. You and him had been friends for quite a while, and eventually just enough more that he could call you to his barrack any time of night and have that perfect feeling of sex fade into his senses with you
that’s all you really were though- fuck buddies. God he hated that term, it made his gut boil with envy and hate that someone could slide into your life and end it all so easily. No, no, that couldn’t happen. He wouldn’t let it happen.
these thoughts all brewed in his mind over the months, but the thing that set it all in motion was when he saw you at the closest base pub getting all close to some civilian. That’s what truly got him going, the fact you were flirting with a civilian- not even part of the team, although he’s not quite sure if that would have been worse.
sure he could tell you his feelings straight up, but where’s the point in that?
so he made a plan. It started in physical motion the second you got back from base and he texted you to come to his room for the usual quick fuck, nothing horrible so far
he had this all planned out- unknown to you of course. Any condom you have now has little needle holes poked in and any drink at his house has just a smidge of something he found just to make sure he takes
he rides you all fucking night even when your half asleep and tired, he still keeps bouncing on your length, his body clenching around your member and his folds wet and inviting as if he was trying to keep every little drop inside of him, his gummy walls squeezing every little drop he can get out of you and cockwarming you till you fall asleep next to him
he just felt it in his bones that it was gonna take, it just had to. And god was he close to bouncing in joy when he pulled out a test a few days later and it came up positive, him getting ready to put on some fake tears to tell you. You couldn’t really just be fuck buddies now, could you?
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ghcstao3 · 6 months
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streamer bfs ghost and soap
ghost who does faceless, minimal talking gaming streams. sometimes watch parties if there’s something interesting (and non-copyrightable). who at most has maybe a couple hundred viewers, but even then that’s a rare number. and who only ever raids soap because duh.
then his viewers being in for a surprise, expecting more quiet, only to be met with a very talkative soap, who usually has a million and one things going on but somehow manages to make it work. who will do drawing streams or gaming or cooking or just about anything requested of him (within reason). who sometimes has a mysterious figure in the background of his face-cam but seldom acknowledges it, even on the rare occasion that said figure wanders up and wraps their arms around soap’s shoulders, face remaining carefully out of frame.
and despite soap garnering a larger following, he almost always only raids ghost, too. and while they’ve never stated anything explicit, haven’t even really acknowledged one another on stream beyond a just sending you guys over—the viewers speculate. whether they’re friends, dating, if it’s just a coincidence. it’s fun.
idk. just streamer au ghoap :)
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redeyerhaenyra · 5 months
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Divine Hammer
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Summary: You bring up something new to Simon. He's more enthusiastic than you expected.
Warnings: What else but smut, HEAVY UK slang usage (me and si come from the same area of England our slang is v similar) Simon slaps reader once, fem reader, oral(f), fingering in BOTH holes, pussy juice as lube, anal duh, simons fat cock, sprinkling of a size kink, mean Simon, kitchen sex mmm, no beta we die like soap (sorry), lmk if I missed anything!
Notes: Listen the taboo of anal just gets me going alright , also this has been in my drafts since JAN 9TH help
Wc: 2.5k
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Simon's stare was unnerving. Well, it was always unnerving, to a degree. But he found ways to utilise it. Deadpan humour, emphasising points of conversation, scaring away would-be hookups from you in the pub. But here, it was unnerving in a whole other way.
It felt… intrusive.
Simon stared at you like he could see through your clothes, your body, into your mind to expose your deepest darkest fantasies. You squirmed under his penetrating gaze, tugging at the hem of your jumper.
After a little while of silence, you shook your head, scoffing at yourself;
“-No, nevermind um.. I'm.. s-sorry that was weird-” “Didn’ say tha’ ”
You gulped, gaze nervously fixed to the floor. Simon was still. Staring. At you. Never before had you felt so exposed, too embarrassed and, if you were honest, a little scared to look at your boyfriend face-on.
“Was just wonderin’ since when my bird was such a slag.”
His baritone words rolled down your spine, sending sparks of a deep, taboo satisfaction through you. You whimpered, and hid your face in your hands.
“Don’ act like a prude love, we both heard what you wanted just now.” “I shouldn't have said anythinnnggg-”
Conceptually, anal had… a certain taboo charm to it. From your perspective at least. Sure, it wasn't technically the “right” hole… it wouldn't feel the same, but the idea had always fascinated you.. intruded your shadowed thoughts at night with your fingers rubbing your clit and edging nervously to an opening further on than your cunt.
So, gently, you'd broached the topic one time you were both in the kitchen together- thinking, in hindsight foolishly, that it'd be something he'd instantly dismiss, or at least… talk about later. In the bedroom. Not in the middle of the kitchen… but now here you stood, in the hole you'd dug for yourself;
“On the contrary, I'm relieved you've finally admitted it to yourself.” His footsteps were heavy against the floorboards as he approached you. Confused, you peeked out of the gaps between your fingers to look at him;
“W-what?” “Don't be fuckin’ coy w'me love.” Simon towered over you, cadging you next to the kitchen side.
“Always suspected there was some depraved shit up here, yeah?” He poked your temple with his index finger, “Turns out my intuitions were correct then?”
“T-thats not-” “Oh yes it is sweet’art.” Simon's eyes grew more intense by the second, even more than before- you struggled to even picture them in your mind for fear of his retribution.
“Ay- fuckin’ look at me when I'm talking to ya.”
He could have been a lot harsher with the small smack he delivered to your cheek, but that knowledge did nothing to dull the pain, and your eyes watered a little at the sensation. He grabbed your cheeks between his fingers, squishing them till you pouted and shaking your head lightly, as if to keep hold of your attention.
As if you could look anywhere else…
Forced to return his ferocious gaze, you crumbled, knees bucking like a fawn under you- Simon grabbed you and roughly hauled you back up, manhandling you to bend over the kitchen counter. You allowed him to, biting your lip in an attempt to muffle your unintentional sounds of appreciation.
It earned you a harsh smack to your rear, and Simon's big paw of a hand tugging your hair. He leaned over you, “ ‘M not ‘avin any of tha’ yeah? You're not gonna be hidin’ how much of a slut you are from me anymore sweet'art.”
The juxtaposition of his words and the way he sweetly kissed your temple after he said them was almost comical. The grip on your hair disappeared, replaced with firm and consistent pulling at your clothes until you shuffled out of them- Simon wasted no time running his warm hands up and down your body, rumbling out various admirations of your physical form.
He slunk down your body, nipping and pressing hot, open mouthed kisses down your back, and then to each of your cheeks, all the way down to your pussy. Earlier on, when you'd ridden yourself of your panties, Simon had laughed at how wet they were. “Already?” He'd asked, “Y'that turned on already? Whore. Like a bitch in heat f'me, ey?”
He had no further comments to mock you with, not now at least. He was busy approving of the view of your wet cunt in front of him- out of the corner of your eye you spied him nodding to himself as if he were appraising fine art.
You huffed, a little impatient, petulant you wiggled your bum at him- only all you got from him was another spank.
“Be patient.” He said curtly.
You whined, but otherwise did as you were told, meekly resigned to your fate as Simon's personal eye candy.
“Why ya’ into it then?” You made a noise of confusion, Simon huffed.
“This.”
One of hands had moved to idly grope and squish your bottom while he'd been down there, and now his thumb creeped ever so slowly over to press on your rim. You keened- suddenly understanding what he meant.
“Well?” His thumb pressed in deeper, you gasped- “I-i don't know!” “Hmmm…”
You could tell from his tone he didn't quite believe you. He kissed your cheek again.
“I'm sure I'll find out.”
With that said, his thumb remained almost gently rubbing at your hole, his free hand moving to pull his balaclava up over his nose- wasting no time in burying himself in your cunt. He sighed contentedly at the taste, smell, feel of you, lazily lapping at your cunny with his broad tongue. His thumb still rubbing you in slow circles, almost.. in a comforting manner.
There was no one more intimidating than Simon- at least out of all the people you've ever met, and yet here he was, eating your pussy like it was a home cooked, three-course meal. You looked over your shoulder, and bit your lip; The visual of big bad Simon Riley on his knees for you, make you shiver and clench.
Simon seemed to be secretly a telepath however, as the way he suddenly roughly pinched your clit between his index finger and thumb- tugging on it cruelly, came off as a punishment. You whined loudly, panting into the counter, drooling a little. Vaguely, you could hear Simon humming thoughtfully to himself. He released his hold on your poor clit, though quickly replaced it by rubbing small, soothing circles on it instead.
It quite quickly becomes a lot more intense, Simon grunting in approval as he plunges his thick tongue into your cunt. Your breathing is staggered, coming out in short, little huffs- you reach behind you to tug at Simon's head, shoving him closer. Again, he groans in appreciation, eagerly nuzzling between your thighs closer, the rhythm of his tongue and fingers rubbing at your clit increased a hundredfold;
Like lighting, your orgasm crashed through you, the noises that left your pussy- wet, squelching, the drip of your juices against the floor, should surely have had you feeling at least some shame, but no. You were too twitchy, too fucked stupid on Simon's tongue to care.
With much reluctantance, Simon hauled himself off of your puffy pussy. He'd gladly stay nestled between your kegs for the rest of him life, at least from further away, he could admire his work.
At this point, you thought perhaps he'd finally get to the meat of what you'd suggested.. Simon wasn't finished yet though- two of his deliciously thick fingers were swiftly shoved into your sopping pussy.
You cried out at the sudden penetration, shivering and trembling.
“What? ..silly cow.” Simon told you gruffly, somewhat annoyed that you'd dare disturb his probing at your cunt with your exclamation of surprise. You whined at his degradation, but were still coherent enough to recognise the underlying affection in his tone. Huffing, you leaned forward to lay your torso fully on the cold, sideboard. The cool temperature of the marble was sharp and sudden, but soon soft and gentle to your hot body, palliative to your hard, puffed up nipples.
He lazily pumped his fingers inside you for a few moments, before curling his fingers forward, dragging against that spongey spot deep within you, and eased his fingers out of you.
You were left huffing and panting like an animal into the counter- Simon had cupped his two fingers- the ones that was just inside of you- just under your clit.. then abruptly he slid them upwards, slowly, pressing down hard.
You squeaked, struggling not to quiver too hard. Simon's fingers kept creeping up and up and up, gliding firmly over your cunny, finally halting at your rim. The hot, wet sensation of Simon rubbing your own slick into your hole as lube had you trembling.
“How's tha?” You heard Simon mumble from behind you, his accent had gotten a little thicker. It always got thicker when he was “in the zone”.
“Oh.. uh..” Seemingly irked by your lack of response, your boyfriend slapped your clit harshly with the back of his hand.
“G-good!! It's good! Good!!” You choked, and whined again when you heard Simon chuckle lowly at you. He tapped his fingers twice on your hole- you nodded shyly at him;
Simon hummed, cautiously easing one of his broad fingers covered in your slick into your ass. The noise of utter debauched pleasure you let escape your throat was nothing compared to Simon's groan-
“Oh fuck that's tight..”
God it was, you felt how hard your greedy hole swallowed up his thick finger. You huffed and puffed- vainly attempting to breath consitently, but your body was too sensitive, muscles pulled too rigid inside you to keep your thoughts on one thing alone.
Simon was your rock, somewhere in the thousands of feelings inside you, was a certainty that he was holding back. Taking it slow, just for you.
You felt the hazey cloud of sex overwhelm you, rendering you more or less unable to speak, only babble incoherently into the counter, your pretty eyes filled with tears as Simon took his sweet, sweet time opening you up.
By comparison to how rough the pads of his digits were, they were remarkably soft with you, even as Simon squeezed one more of his fingers in you. You coughed and hiccups at the fullness of it.
“Tha's it.. good girl.. cmon.. open up luv.. there we go..”
You head him whisper, and you moaned impatiently. You wanted to politely express your readiness for his dick, but all the you were able to whine out was “C-cock-!”
Simon laughed, which was always a nice, comforting rumble. “I know sweet'art, gotta get you a little looser f'me first yeah?”
Even as you keened and begged, Simon would not budge. Occasionally, if he was feeling particularly mean in that moment, he'd flick your poor clit harshly, you'd squeal and twitch. This continued for a while, and by the time he deemed you “ready” you might have passed out, the electric fizzles of pleasure that sizzled between your legs kept you awake.
Simon could tell you were tired, he was gentle with the way he slipped his hand under you tummy to push your bum in the air, and tender with how he cradled your hip. Your clit was kindly soothed with slow, small circles rubbed in by his middle finger.
You sobbed into the side- “cock…” you babbled, sniffing and feeling sorry for yourself. You felt a kiss to the base of your neck;
“Mmmm.. I know baby, I know, m' so mean aren't I?”
Vaguely, you heard yourself murmuring in agreement. The metallic sound of Simon's belt loosening and then his zipper coming down had warm excitement flutter over your body.
You felt the heat of his dick before it even touched you, whimpering when it finally did. Simon rubbed his thick cock up and down the apex of your thighs, right up to hole and then back down to your clit. When you would whine at him, he'd hum right back.
God, he was so much bigger than you. He leant over you and covered your entire body with his bulk. You felt him throb at your rim. A kiss was levied at your neck- “Y’ready?” He asked, voice low, and you babbled back something that sounded like impatience. Simon chuckled and kissed your neck again, bracing one strong arm against the counter next to you.
All of a sudden he was inside you, not all the way but he was inside you and that's all you could think about. You gasped, inadvertently holding your breath and then once more remembering to breathe. Simon had stayed silent throughout this.. you reached backwards for him with one hand;
“Si?” “Y-yeah, yeah m’here, g’ve us a minute love-”
His voice came out ragged and shaky, and from the sounds of it he was doing the same forgetting-to-breath thing you were.
You both needed occasionally little breaks from him sliding his cock inside you this time, either of you would cum too quickly. But soon, all of him was pressed snugly inside you. You drooled on the counter and Simon's head had dropped to rest on your back, taking slow, steady breaths, grounding himself.
The both of you stayed like this for a while. It was almost peaceful. Soft. Till Simon decided he was fine to move and dragged his dick alllllllll the way back out and then in again in one thrust. It left you choked for breath, Simon too, he was more vocal this time than any other time you'd fucked.
Neither of you lasted long, specially not after your boyfriend had clasped his big paw of a hand under your leg, and lifted it up onto the counter next to you, an entirely new and more intimate angle. You were cumming before you even realised Simon had crept his hand down to pinch your clit. He was so mean about it too- that same hand then came up to shove to of his fingers into your mouth, creating a spit-slicked mess. And when he came it was an event:
He threw his head back and moaned more desperately than you'd ever heard from him before. The rhythmic squelch that narrated your encounter kept going even after he'd cum, if anything it was louder now. His and your cum dripping down out of you and puddling on the floor beneath you. Still, meekly, Simon kept thrusting into you, as if the orgasm was too good to end. Though finally it did, Simon's weight all but collapsing ontop of you.
You stayed like that for a while, still connected. Basking in your respective afterglows. Simon kissed your neck again and you croaked out a satisfied noise;
“Fun..” The man behind you laughed, “Yeah fun was it? Just fun eh? Just fun~?” Cruelly he reached under you to tickle your sides- you squealed; “More than f-fun!!” and that seemed to sate him, releasing you.
“Yeah, s’what I thought…..” He drummed his fingers on the counter..
“Bath?” “bath….”
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naerwenia · 1 year
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Call Of Duty Audio Smut!
I realised I have not kept up with G W A reddit for a while and what has been going on? More Ghost, some König and Soap too! So here’s for your enjoyment :3 I have included both link to the post on G W A and straight to audio, since not everyone has Reddit, but please go give the artists some praise and comments if you like the audio! All audios are M4F, so male voices for female listeners. Have fun (as long as you’re an adult, MDNI!)
Simon “Ghost” Riley
Caught by Ghost by Badjhur (audio) (Mdom, dubcon)
Zero Hour by Badjhur (audio) (Mdom, squadmates to lovers)
Ghosting the Party by Badjhur (audio) (Mdom, interrogation)
Testing the Perimeter by Badjhur (audio) (Mdom, squadmates to lovers)
Only a Specialist’s Touch by Badjhur (audio) (Mdom, keep quiet, squadmates to lovers)
Training a Military Brat by Badjhur (audio) (Mdom, brat taming duh)
Clouded Conscience by Badjhur (audio) (Mdom, friends to lovers)
Lesson in Biochemistry by Badjhur (audio) (Mdom, sex pollen, dubcon)
Ghostly Comfort by  AmbroseKincaidVA (audio) (Mdom, comfort sex)
Riling up Riley by Badjhur (audio) 
This Town Ain’t Big Enough by mowhispers (audio) (AU, Sheriff Ghost is after wanted listener, Mdom)
Ghost Stories - Prisoner of War-Games by Badjhur (audio) (M4A, Mdom to Msub)
You’re Mine, I’m Yours by lostintheblaze (audio) (Mdom, spit and size kink, exhibitionism)
Ghost Stories - The Mask Stays On by Badjhur (audio) (MDom, rough sex)
This Town Ain’t Big Enough by SouthLandTale (audio)
König
Doktor’s Orders by Badjhur (audio) (Msub König, established relationship)
Trapped in a cave? by Helloworld1337 (audio)
Taking Care of König by wagnerfirst (audio)
Taking care of König by Helloworld1337 (audio)
A Night with König by cover_immortality (audio) (impro, msub)
What are you DOING under there? by Badjhur (audio) (blowjob, plus sized listener)
'Interrogated' by 141's Teutonic Titan by Badjhur (audio) (CNC, Mdom, bound)
CoD Stories - Warm Sentiments by GermanRaidenASMR (audio) (Gentle Mdom, allies to lovers) 
A Lazy Morning with König by GermanRaidenASMR (audio) (BFE, gentle Mdom)
I Make it Up to You Schatz by GermanRaidenASMR (audio) 
John “Soap” MacTavish
Coming Clean by touchshriek (audio) (Mdom, enemies to lovers, manhandling outdoor sex)
Late Hours by ScotsLibrarian (audio) (Mdom, interrogation)
Late Hours by Touchshriek (audio)
Brats Get Punished Like They Deserve by ScotsLibrarian (audio) (Mdom, puppy sub, rough)
Captain John Price
Bravo Six Going Dark - When the Lights Go Out by Badjhur (audio) (Mdom, listener is a mother, neighbors to lovers)
Price of Punishment by Badjhur (audio) (MDom, impact play, brat taming)
Multiple characters
Let us fuck your brains out and relieve that stress by Badhjur (audio) (Ghost, König, Soap, foursome)
Your Little Fantasies Are Out Of Control by hfoaudio (audio) (Ghost AND König, mdom, love triangle)
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Second Chances
Summary: It’s not common knowledge that you have a superpower: regeneration. You didn’t think that would be a problem... Jason and Damian think otherwise.
Relationships: Jason Todd x Vigilante!Reader, Damian Wayne & Jason Todd & Reader (platonic because they’re brothers duh)
DAMIAN WAYNE IS MY SON I LOVE HIM SO MUCH (I just watched the Supersons movie he makes me smile so hard)
Word Count: 4.8k
Content warning for temporary character death. Reader’s vigilante name is Ghoul, BTW.
Jason is in the shower when he hears someone break into his apartment.
He groans, makes sure all the shampoo is rinsed out of his hair, then grabs the knife mounted to his curtain rod. It’s not the first time someone has attacked him in the shower, and it probably won’t be the last. Still, Jason wishes they would at least give him time to grab a towel. It’s just as uncomfortable for him as it is for them.
This time, they actually do. Maybe they’re going to be polite enough to wait for him to finish cleaning all of Gotham’s sludge off his body. Jason would appreciate the sentiment more if the upcoming fight wouldn’t immediately dirty his body again with their blood.
He doesn’t turn off the shower when he steps out, dries his feet on the bath mat. He’s reaching for his towel when he hears one of the intruders say something.
He recognizes that voice.
Jason sticks his head out of the bathroom and glowers. “What are you doing here, brat?”
Damian Wayne, one of Bruce Wayne’s many children and the current Robin, scowls right back. “Why is your shower still running, Todd? Do you not care for conservation efforts? There are people in Michigan who would—”
“Okay, Dami,” interrupts another voice.
Jason’s whole body flushes. He makes sure every part of him except his face is hidden behind the door when a second person comes into view.
Your vigilante costume is zipped halfway, the top pulled down and sleeves tied around your waist, exposing the compression shirt with kevlar-like weave you wore beneath it. A large bandage is wrapped around your upper arm, growing redder by the second.
“Hi, Y/N,” Jason says. Does he sound too excited? Does he not sound excited enough?
You just smile. “Hey, Jace. Sorry, we came by for first aid supplies. We’ll be out of your hair in just a sec.”
“No, don’t rush on my account,” Jason says. Does he sound too desperate? “Just give me a—”
He ducks back into the bathroom to turn off the shower after making sure he’s clean and one hundred percent soap-free. Not expecting company, he’d only brought a pair of boxers and military-style shorts in with him. Rushing, hoping you don’t leave before he gets out (Damian can leave, though) he pulls both on and slams the door open.
It hits the wall so hard it rebounds back into Jason’s hand. You jump at the sound, nearly poking Damian with the needle in your hand.
“Watch it, idiot!” Damian snaps. To Jason, he says, “You just dented your wall. Moron.”
“Don’t talk to them like that,” Jason says sternly. God, he knows why the brat is so prickly, but he still got on Jason’s last nerves. He checks the wall, hoping the brat exaggerated, but nope. Another dent to match the nicks, scrapes, and bullet holes that already littered his apartment.
He is never getting back his security deposit.
You’re about to stitch up a cut on Damian’s arm when Jason clucks his tongue. “That doesn’t look good.” The bandage around your arm is sodden with blood.
“It’s not as bad as it looks,” you say dismissively. “Ready, Dami?”
Interestingly enough, the brat doesn’t tell you off for giving him a nickname. It seems to be a privilege reserved exclusively for you and Dick; every time Jason tries, he’s vehemently told off.
Then again, his nicknames are usually derogatory. That might contribute to it a little bit.
Damian sets his jaw and you stitch him up quickly, murmuring, “I’m sorry,” every time his fingers twitch—the only indication of pain he’ll show. Jason eyes the bandage around your arm with worry, but the blood stain doesn’t grow any more in the interim.
As soon as you tie off the thread, Damian hops to his feet and scurries for the bathroom. You start to get up, brow pinched with worry, but Jason says, “Let me look at your arm.”
Your eyes take a while to slide from the shut bathroom door to Jason’s face, but then you say, “Yeah, okay,” and sink back into your chair.
To distract you as he unpeels the sticky bandage from your arm, Jason asks, “So you’re on babysitting duty now, huh?”
“Oh, no, Damian and I patrol together every Friday night.” You use finger quotes with the other hand and say, “B think it ‘promotes more accountability’ when someone gets injured during patrol if they have a partner.”
Jason frowns at the sight of the cut. It’s obviously from a knife, and not pretty, exactly, but also not big enough to let out as much blood as soaked through the bandage. “Who did this to you?”
“Just a typical goon. It’s really not a big deal.” Your eyes follow Jason’s gaze. “I guess it bled a lot, huh? Like a head wound. You know, disproportionate.” You tug your sleeve over the wound.
“Y/N is not as weak as the rest of you,” Damian sneers, having vacated the bathroom on silent feet. You jump, and so does Jason, even though he has Batman-honed instincts.
There’s just something intoxicating about your presence. You’re… distracting.
It was manageable back before Jason was Robin and you were one of his classmates. You were obsessed with Batman and crimefighting, and Jason was a bookworm, so your friendship shouldn’t have worked, but it did.
Then, ironically, Bruce Wayne adopted him and Jason became the crimefighter. He never told you about his identity to protect Bruce’s, but you figured it out when he died.
Then he came back to Gotham, hellbent on revenge, and burned every bridge he’d ever built. Including the one with you.
Jason still could barely believe you give him the time of day after all the awful things he’d said and done. But you’re just as obsessed with redemption and forgiveness as Bruce, and he will never take that for granted.
His fascination with you was manageable before Jason died, but it’s downright consuming now.
Jason can’t believe how you’d grown up to be so… so flat-out amazing. Graceful, and maybe not as skilled at hand-to-hand as the rest of Gotham’s vigilantes, but you adapt with a long-range fighting style. You’re strong, and self-assured, and really, seriously gorgeous.
Jason realizes his hand is still on your arm, touching the soft skin, and he yanks it away as if burnt. He doesn’t understand how you remain so scar-free despite years of crimefighting, and he’s abruptly self-conscious about the marks that litter his torso, arms, and legs. Your eyes roam over them, lingering on his chest and stomach
He’s most self-conscious about the jagged ‘J’ carved into his cheek, and Jason tries to cover it with his hand without drawing attention. That doesn’t work—he looks like a weirdo waving his hands around—so he tilts his cheek away so you don’t have to see it anymore.
You clear your throat and look away, as if embarrassed for some reason.
Damian’s gaze pingpongs between the two of you before he rolls his eyes, sighing dramatically. “Are you two finished?”
You push away from the table and make a grabby hand. Damian rolls his eyes again, but he sidles closer, and you check his stitched cut. Your thumb rubs over the raised line of stitches like you’re trying to wipe his pain away.
Jason realizes he’s staring at the bottom lip you’re jutting out in sympathy. He flushes again.
After everything he did, he can’t expect anything more than friendship from you. If that’s what you’re willing to give, he’ll never push for more.
“I am fine, Y/N,” Damian said, pushing your hand away, albeit gently. A hint of whine entered his voice and Jason blinked. It wasn’t often that he heard Damian sound like an actual kid. “Can we resume patrol now?”
“Wait,” Jason hears someone say, and it’s—him, he’s the one saying it. “Are you hungry? I have a casserole in the oven.”
Damian snorts. “My apologies. I did not know you had adopted the personality of a middle-aged white wom—”
You cover Damian’s mouth with your hand and say, “That sounds great, Jay. Thanks.”
Jason’s greedy. He’ll take whatever scraps he can get from you.
The three of you eat, the conversation pleasant whenever Damian isn’t threatening Jason because Jason taunted him. You laugh as they bicker, used to the antics of Gotham’s vigilantes by now.
Once everyone is done, it’s just about time for the Red Hood to start his patrol, so with a little cajoling from you, Damian agrees to let Jason tag along until your patrol ends. Jason suits up, and you lead the charge out of his apartment window, followed by Damian. Jason is last out, stopping briefly to make sure the window latches before stepping off the fire escape.
The sensation of his stomach rising is familiar from so many years of grappling through the city, but no less exhilarating. He follows your and Robin’s flipping shapes as the two of you tear through the city. The bright primary color accents on Robin’s suit and the pale gray color of your own shouldn’t blend in so well with Gotham’s shadows, but you and Damian manage pretty well. It turns into kind of a game of tag, and whenever he gets close enough, you grin and twist away, muffling laughter behind one hand.
He could definitely catch you, but he thinks you’re enjoying the game of cat-and-mouse just as much as he, if not more.
Jason’s just thinking to himself that there’s not much crime tonight when the Batsignal lights up the sky.
“Way to ruin the mood,” he grumbles. The game is over. The three of you grapple toward the giant light without any more flipping or laughter.
Jim Gordon obviously isn’t expecting them when they land. After all, it’s common knowledge that Ghoul is a Bat-affiliate, but Red Hood’s alliance with the Batclan is still relatively new. Shaky.
And a lot of people still think the Red Hood hates Ghoul. Admittedly, the way Jason tried to kill you when he returned hadn’t helped the rumors.
It made sense at the time. He’d also tried to kill Batman, Nightwing, and Robin, so it’s not like it was entirely personal. You don’t hold a grudge.
“Where’s Batman?” is his first question.
You shrug. “Running late.”
Jason’s not sure if that’s true. With you and Robin patrolling Newtown and Otisburg, Spoiler and Red Robin handling everything from the Coventry to the Upper East Side, and Black Bat and Batwing watching over everything else but the Tricorner, the city is in pretty good hands for the night.
And yes, Jason’s knowledge about patrol schedules is from his days as a crime lord, but it still comes in handy as a reformed vigilante.
“Why did you summon us here, Commissioner?” Robin asks.
“Bane escaped Arkham earlier tonight,” says the Commissioner. “We have reason to believe he’s hiding out in Amusement Mile. The Joker’s not out, for one, and we have a… witness… that claims to have seen Bane in the park.”
“Where is this witness?” Robin demands.
“In our holding cell, sobering up,” Gordon says with a long-suffering sigh.
“Oh, great,” Jason says. “So it might have been Bane, or it might have been one of those giant stuffed bears at every amusement park.”
You elbow him in the side and promise Gordon, “We’ll check it out, Commish. Let you know when he’s handled again!”
You and Robin balance on the edge of the roof. Jason asks in a low tone, “Batman’s not coming tonight, is he?” He would have already been here.
You and Robin share a guilty look.
Jason sighs. Bane is a tough opponent, possibly their strongest rogue. It’ll take a lot of force to bring him down… force he’s not sure you and Robin can muster. You’re good vigilantes, don’t get him wrong, but Robin is a prepubescent boy and has the height and muscle mass to show for it. You’re strong and graceful and should be fine as long as you keep your distance, but Jason’s the only one that comes close to Bane in terms of muscle mass.
It’ll be up to him to keep the two of you safe.
“I think I parked my bike somewhere around here,” you say. “It’ll get us there faster than grappling.”
Jason thinks something is stuck in his throat. He croaks, “You have a motorcycle?”
You nod. He can’t see your face beneath the mask, but he’s pretty sure you’re smiling. “Got it just a couple weeks ago, but I needed Earl to paint it over.”
“It is parked in that alley.” Robin points.
“Okay,” Jason says. “You two drive to my apartment. I’ll follow above, then we’ll head to Amusement Mile.”
“Aye-aye,” you joke. “Come on, bud.”
You and Robin swing away, the younger boy loudly complaining about the myriad nicknames you think up for him. Jason swings away to get a headstart. A minute later, the sound of a bike engine revving hits Jason’s ears, and it isn’t long after that he looks down to see you and Robin on a pale bike painted in the same colors as your suit.
You look up and wave.
Jason almost misses his next swing. He swallows and has to look away. Seeing you on a motorcycle…
As soon as he puts the key in his bike’s ignition, you speed away, tires squealing against the asphalt. Jason grins and twists the throttle. He shoots onto the street and hunches low to decrease wind resistance, pushing the bike hard to catch up to you.
You wear no helmet, but you’d forced Robin to wear one. He sits behind you on the bike, arms locked around your waist. At the sight of Jason, he makes a rude gesture, but Jason just huffs out a laugh. The brat likes to aggravate him on purpose, but it’s hard to feel annoyed when he drives next to you, racing side-by-side.
It doesn’t take long to reach Amusement Mile. You and Jason shift gears, rolling to a stop.
“You and Robin go high,” Jason instructs. “I’ll go low.”
“Roger.” You kick the stand for your bike, then you and Robin shoot your grapples for the nearest roof.
In seconds, the two of you are out of sight.
Jason swallows. He hates this strip of clown-themed land. The Joker isn’t in it currently, but it still reminds him of that madman.
Come on. He shakes himself. Jason can’t afford to get distracted. Bane is dangerous.
Jason makes no effort to muffle the sounds of his footsteps as he strolls through the park. A plastic bag drifts along the path with a gust of wind, and a couple bowling pins on the ground roll. But apart from that, the park is empty and quiet.
Too quiet.
Jason turns just in time to avoid a crushing blow to his head.
He hits the ground rolling and comes up with guns blazing. Bullets deflect off Bane’s armor, and he doesn’t seem to feel the ones that burrow into his skin.
“You will not stop me, Red Hood,” says the mechanized voice. “No one will stop me in my pursuit to break Batman, even though he sent you in his place.”
“He didn’t send me,” says Jason.
Help comes from above. A steel bola—one of your weapons of choice—whips through the air and wraps around Bane’s throat. He chokes and reaches up to untangle it. At the same time, a Batarang slices through the air and cuts straight through one of the hoses pumping super-steroid into his body.
He groans. Drops to one knee.
Jason spares a glance to the rooftops, but he only sees Robin.
That moment of distraction costs him. Bane surges back to his feet and tackles him. Jason hits the ground, the back of his head colliding against the pavement so hard his vision blacks out for a moment.
He blinks away the darkness in time to see a punishing fist aimed right for his head. There’s not enough time to dodge. Jason can only brace for an impact… that never comes.
The hook of a grapple is embedded into Bane’s wrist. Its line is taught. On the roof of a decrepit popcorn stand, Robin yanks back with all his might.
Jason knees Bane in the crotch, then elbows him in the face.
Bane grunts and yanks his arm forward, pulling Robin right to the ground in a flutter of cape, but Jason slips out from beneath him and rolls to his feet. Bane may be strong, and his hits may hurt, but that’s only if they connect. And Bane isn’t very fast.
The engine of a bike roars, and your voice shouts, “Hood, out of the way!”
Jason obeys without thinking. It’s a good thing he doesn’t hesitate, because he barely dodges your motorcycle before you ram it full-speed into Bane.
Not even the giant can resist a motorcycle going full-throttle. He topples back, and you keep driving, treating his body like a ramp.
Jason laughs despite himself. “I can see tire tracks on your face, ugly!” He and Robin throw knives at the same time. Robin’s slices off another steroid line. Jason’s lodges in Bane’s shoulder. It should have severed his deltoid, leaving his arms useless, but the man doesn’t react to the pain at all.
Getting run over pisses Bane off. You turn in a sharp circle on the bike and rev your engine, obviously ready to try the same trick twice.
But Jason sees the tension in Bane’s legs, and he’s shouting for you to stop after you start.
You don’t listen. You just drive.
Bane sidesteps your bike at the last possible second, and his arm shoots out. His hand is large enough to wrap around your entire throat, and it yanks you off your bike, which skids away with a screech of tire and metal. You choke, scrabbling at the iron fingers around your throat.
Jason has his gun out in a second, but Bane holds your body in front of his. So Jason shoots his foot. It doesn't have an effect.
“Ghoul!” Robin shouts. He unsheathes his katana.
“I tire of this,” Bane says through his modulator.
He snaps your neck.
“NO!”
It’s like the world slows down. Jason can only watch as Bane carelessly drops your lifeless body.
He sees Robin lunge with his sword. He sees Bane casually backhand him so hard he drops his katana. Robin flies backward, hits the popcorn stand, and slumps to the ground, motionless.
Bane steps on you—your body—and something in your spine cracks. Something in Jason’s chest cracks, too, and he sees green.
The Pit surges.
After it recedes, Robin’s katana is lodged firmly in a moaning Bane’s side. Every one of his steroid pumps is severed, and his mask is cracked. He’s weak enough without his Venom that three Bat-restraints and a set of handcuffs can hold him.
Huh. Jason’s surprised he didn’t kill him.
His knuckles are bleeding; they’re slick inside his gloves. When he flexes his fingers, pain screams up his nerves, through his arm all the way to his heart. At least two are broken, and another knuckle might be dislocated. His jaw hurts, his brain is pounding—concussion, probably—and his knee feels swollen. But he can put pressure on it, at least, and he limps to a stirring Robin.
“Hey,” Jason says. His voice is rough. He doesn’t remember yelling. He tries to crouch, but can’t with the stiff knee, so he just kind of collapses in front of the kid. “Robin. Status report.”
The kid looks at him, wobbling even though he’s sitting down. One hand goes up to touch the back of his head, and the tips of his gloves gleam with dark blood when he pulls it back. “Possible concussion,” he says with a wavering voice. “Ribs—”
Robin gasps and stumbles to his feet.
“Don’t—”
Jason tries to grab him, but Robin wobbles out of his reach. He walks hunched over in a zigzag, limping to your—
Jason grunts and stands back up. “Hey, hey, Robin.” He gets between the kid and you. “Don’t. Don’t—don’t look.”
“Do not stop me, Todd,” hisses the kid, and wow, he must be seriously out of it to use Jason’s civilian name. “Let me see them.”
“You don’t want to,” Jason says grimly. He’s seen snapped necks before, and they’re… Well, they’re as unnatural-looking as they sound.
He hears a rushing in his ears. A wave of grief is cresting, ready to sweep him away, but Jason has to keep it together for Robin. He barely hears his own voice when he says, “Ghoul’s gone.” He can’t say the ‘D’ word. Not when he feels like puking.
“Unhand me, you blackguard,” Robin hissed. “You do not understand. They might be—”
“They’re not.”
“Todd!” the kid says, voice rising into a shrill.
Something clicks behind them.
Jason whirls around to make sure Bane hasn’t broken out of his restraints.
He hasn’t.
So what made the noise?
He and Robin are looking right at the body when some invisible force takes your head and—and wrenches it.
Robin lets out a low cry.
Jason feels frozen. He doesn’t stop the kid when he stumbles forward and collapses next to the body. His shoulders shake, head bowed with grief.
Jason is still watching when he sees your chest rise and fall with a breath.
“Oh, what the fuck,” he whispers, stumbling back. “What the fuck, what the fuck, what the—”
Your head raises, and you reach to your neck with a wince.
Robin freezes.
“Ow,” you grumble, pushing up to your elbows. “That sucked.”
“What the fuck?” Jason exclaims.
“What is going on?” Robin demands.
You look between the two vigilantes. “Sorry to freak you out, guys.” Which is a completely underwhelming thing to say when you just died and then unsnapped your own neck.
Robin makes a low, wounded sound, then throws himself at you, wrapping his arms around your neck and squeezing hard. You hug him back just as tight, murmuring low things that Jason tries not to hear. It’s a personal moment, and he feels like an intruder, but he can’t move. His feet are planted to the ground.
Seconds ago, you’d been dead. No doubt about it. Bane had snapped your neck and you had crumbled like paper.
Now you’re breathing and alive.
It doesn’t compute. It doesn’t make any sense.
Robin comes to the same conclusion, because he pulls away and pinches your arm. “How is this possible?”
“Bud, do you remember when… you remember when Pyg got me, right?”
“Of course.”
“Well, I don’t,” says Jason. Professor Pyg kidnapped you? What the fuck? When did that happen?
You look up at him, still holding Robin close. “We weren’t exactly on speaking terms when it happened, Hood.”
Oh.
“But Father ran his tests and said his experimentation just gave you advanced healing,” says Robin.
“Which is technically true—”
“Resurrection is quite different from healing!” the kid says.
“Wait, you knew they had powers?” Jason asks Robin.
The kid sneers at him. “Of course. I was the one that found Ghoul, and I patrol with them at least once a week. It would take an unobservant fool to miss their obvious healing abilities."
Jason bristles with indignation.
Robin's head turns on a swivel to glare at you. "It was less obvious that you have nothing to fear from physical injuries. Informing me of this fact would have greatly reduced the chances of experiencing emotional distress at the sight of your dead, mangled body."
"I know," you say, cupping his chin in your hand. "I'm really, really sorry, Dami."
"Do not address me as such," he says, "we are in costume." Robin huffs and scrambles out of your lap, brushing debris off his suit. Then he wobbles and nearly falls over, and you lunge to catch him.
"Woah, bud, you okay?"
"He's concussed," Jason says.
"Too concussed to ride on the back of my bike?"
"Of course not," says Robin. Then he leans over and pukes.
"Oh, Batman's gonna kill me," you mutter.
It's a much tamer drive to the Batcave, in case Robin rolls off the bike accidentally. He doesn't, but you do have to stop a couple of times so he can lean over the side and retch.
When all is said and done and you're back at the Cave and Alfred and Bruce are fussing over Damian, you and Jason hang back a bit. He can't stop sneaking glances at you. Your Ghoul mask is off, and there's a little dried blood around your nostrils, and your hair is a little sweaty, but you're the most beautiful thing Jason's ever seen.
You're alive. He can hardly believe it.
You suddenly sigh and mutter, "I guess you're mad at me, too?"
"What?" Jason startles.
"For not telling you about my abilities."
"Y/N—"
"I just didn't want you guys to think of me differently. Duke has his powers, yeah, but he was born with them. I got mine from Pyg. I didn't want everyone to start treating me like a victim."
All things considered, you're remarkably well-adjusted for someone that survived Professor Pyg's experimentation. "You're the strongest person I've ever met, Y/N," says Jason. "Your powers don't change that. They make me feel a little better about you patrolling at night, anyway. They're basically like... a second chance."
You snort. "I think I'm on my fifth chance by this point."
Jason shakes his head. "How did you keep your powers a secret, again?"
"Well, the first time, Pyg shut off my heart, but that didn't shut down my body. When I actually noticed that I couldn't die, though, was that time one of Cobblepot's goons stabbed me in the neck and I woke up in the middle of a shootout. Now that wasn't fun." You grimace. "A bullet caught me in the head and I died as soon as I sat up. The Bats were too preoccupied to notice me, luckily. Then there was that time with the poison dart that I kept a secret, and now this time." You smirk, cross your arms, and bump Jason's hip with your own. "I'm beating you in the resurrection department, aren't I?"
Jason huffs, pretending to be offended, and your eyes widen. "Oh, my God. That was in such poor taste. I'm so sorry."
"No," he says, trying to hide the twist of his lips. If it was anyone else saying it, Jason would probably kill them. "No, it's okay. I'm just glad you're all right. It would have been awful if you'd died and I never took the chance to..."
"Chance to what?" You look up at him through your eyelashes.
Jason's breath catches in his throat. He's never done this before, dammit, but seeing you die today made him remember just how limited their time is as vigilantes.
Well, maybe not yours, but he walks a thin line.
"Doyouwanttogetcoffeewithme?"
You blink. "What?"
"Do you," Jason says slowly, feeling sweat prickle on his hairline, "want to... Um. Get coffee? With me. As in, like—"
"A date?"
"Only if you want to."
You nod, eyes sparkling. "Hell yeah I want to!"
Damian, Bruce, and Alfred look over at your raised voice. Their disapproving smiles are all eerily similar.
"Sorry," you whisper. You look back at Jason and say, "Yeah, I'd like that. I've been waiting ages for you to ask."
Yes. You said yes. Adrenaline rushes through Jason's veins, and he only barely resists the urge to pump his fist in the air like a moron. He's brave enough to tease, "Well, why didn't you ask me?"
Your face flushes and you look away.
It's at that moment that Damian calls, "Y/N. Stop twittering with Todd and come here. Your presence is required."
"Seriously," Jason said under his breath, "the way he talks like a Victorian child doesn't bother you at all?"
You're smiling. "I think he's adorable." You walk backwards to the brat, making a phone gesture with your hand and mouthing to Jason, Call me.
He definitely will.
"Master Jason," comes Alfred's disapproving voice when he turns back to his bike. "Don't think I didn't notice that you have your own injuries to tend to."
Of course, that sets off Bruce's worry alert even more.
Jason groans. He won't be able to sneak out for coffee with you for an entire week after this whole debacle.
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