#and this is a rly important thing for me to express so

[chisatowo]

Okie I took a shower and now I'm normal again (lying) anyways look at my son

[honeytonedhottie]

the art of conversation (from a professional yapper)⋆.ೃ࿔*:･🍉

just wanted to preface this by saying that NOT everyone is extremely sociable and thats totally okay. this post is to help improve ur conversational skills and charisma ✨

WHY LEARNING TO BE SOCIAL IS IMPORTANT ;

social skills are literally the FOUNDATION of effective communication. its important bcuz it allows u to build meaningful relationships, express urself, collaborate with others etc.

when ur learn how to be an effective communicator u can connect more deeply with the people around u. being more social can also provide u with opportunities, and in general make ur life SO much easier. not to mention u have a lot more fun.

SUPERIORITY/INFERIORITY COMPLEX ;

an inferiority complex is the feeling of inadequacy, an insecurity that ur not on the same level as someone else. a superiority complex is the opposite, u can come off as smug or condescending. both are bad in their own right.

the way that u can combat this is by adopting the mindset that you are neither below or above anyone else, and no one else is above or below you.

doing so can kind of even the playing field of conversation in ur mind and make sure that ur not feeling some kind of way before going into a conversation bcuz when u let ur superiority/inferiority complex go by un-fixed it can sabotage communication and not give ppl the change to get to know u.

UNLEARN SHAME ;

first u gotta start off with thinking about ways that shame has influenced ur thoughts or actions. an example that im sure a lot of us could relate to is the whole cringe concept.

to help unlearn shame i recommend journalling, therapy, and mindfulness so that then u can let urself ENJOY things again, without having the looming fear of the judgement of others.

also no genuinely happy person is going to take time out of their day to shame u, only a loser would do that. and if ur the one shaming others for liking something bcuz of ur own insecurity, get that fixed and get a life.

PREPPING FOR CONVERSATION ;

when approaching someone or starting conversation with someone for the first time, a rly good way to start it is with a compliment. dont start it by saying hi cuz i think thats so awkward 😭

compliment them for something, their response can also tell u a lot about them also bcuz some ppl will take the compliment well and some ppl will serve u a dirty look and that alone can tell u if u rly wanna be conversing with that person.

LEARN TO LAUGH ;

since we've already talked about why learning to not feel embarrassed about every little thing is important, here's what to do when something like that comes up. literally laugh.

for example the other day someone whom i've never spoken to before came up to me and started talking to me so familiarly, like with their arm around me and everything and i just went with it 💀 until he noticed that he had mistaked me for someone else, but its okay cuz now i have a new friend. LAUGH ABOUT IT.

dont take everything so seriously, being able to enjoy and take a joke is what makes conversation so much fun. note, do NOT mistake taking a joke as taking disrespect bcuz u should not take that, there is a distinct difference.

the biggest advice i can give as a yapper is to be more lighthearted and not take everything seriously. bcuz i feel like when we take everything so seriously we become rigid and thats not hot, be a breath of fresh air instead ✨

[ja-khajay]

hiii! In regards to the "Guillermo del Toro Says “We Have to Rescue” Studio Animation From “Emoji-Style Behavior”" article/statement, do u have examples of animation that specifically is & is not this type of expression/animation? Bc it's rly hard for me to actually picture this and like I need examples ahaha

Disclaimer - I was not at this specific talk, so I don't have the full context and I know from reliable sources - friends of mine that DID attend it - that it's not all he said there, so that article is pretty much only relying spicy chosen bits. That being said, I will focus on this paragraph.

Getting more specific, he went on to detail what he despises about certain lazy proclivities in commercial animation, notably how characters and emotions are “codified into a sort of teenage rom-com, almost emoji-style behavior.” He added, “[If] I see a character raising his fucking eyebrow, or crossing his arms, having a sassy pose — oh, I hate that shit. [Why] does everything act as if they’re in a sitcom? I think it is emotional pornography. All the families are happy and sassy and quick, everyone has a one-liner. Well, my dad was boring. I was boring. Everybody in my family was boring. We had no one-liners. We’re all fucked up. That’s what I want to see animated. I would love to see real life in animation. I actually think it’s urgent. think it’s urgent to see real life in animation.”

What he talks about here is something I find omnipresent in modern American animation, or from studios that are funded by and/or trying to sell to americans (ex: Illumination McGuff). Here del Toro specifically mentions characters and emotions and how they are codified, which would include how characters are written, how animated their emotions and body language are, how they interact... He also mentions studio animation, an important distinction - this does not include indie animators!

A few things, adding * to those he's specifically calling out here, and more of my own that are not stated but I feel match the style

*one liners

*the "dreamworks face"

*sassy attitude

*quick banter

*taking poses

looking into the camera

overtly smooth, cartoony body language

characters explaining their emotions, plot resolutions around this

I will now get to examples, starting by a comparison between two animated films. Both of these films are contemporary, family-audience, french animated films. They share similarities in setting, being medieval fantasy fairytales about female heroes. One of these films was made with an american audience in mind (Pil), and the other caters to a french audience (Dragon Princess). You can compare how the characters act in both trailers:

Try and only focus on dialog, body language and expressions, barring art style and story!

Feature films that, in my opinion, also fit that "emoji style behaviour" (* for those I have not fully watched) any why:

Turning Red: the sass, the one liners, body language, camera looking, quick banter, plot resolution with characters explaining their emotions. The whole film fits

Puss in Boots: The last wish: sass, one liners, body language, banter, characters explaining their emotions. Scenes like Puss meeting his past lives and the dog's dialog are strong offenders

The emperor's new groove: sass, one liners, posing, banter

Encanto: sass, posing, banter; the explaining their emotions to drive the plot is ridiculously present to the point where I'd say del Toro was vagueing that one with the family example

Klaus: posing, banter, body language, explaining their emotions

*Nimona: sass, posing, banter, expressions...I only watched the trailer so can't say much but it leans HARD into the rapid fire quip territory with emotional resolution

*Trolls: sass, posing, banter, body language, camera looking...

Regarding films that do not do this, the quick answer would be...watch foreign (=not american) and/or older films. Nowadays with internet a massive catalogue is available, although the USA has such a monopoly on animation via its advertising budget other countries don't have that those films can be harder to find especially if you only use english-speaking internet.

As most studio animation is for a young or family audience and my entire example list above is, I will give some recommendations of films that are also for such an audience, but with older and worldwide picks. Some of these films are fully available on YouTube (although not in english always), so I'll be linking that when possible!

Mom is pouring rain (France, 2020s) (trailer): A shorter film about a little girl sent to live with her grandmother while her mom heals from depression. Has emotions front and center but expressed and animated in a way typical of modern french animation, with cartoony designs but subtler, more "boring" acting

The little prince and the eight headed dragon (Japan, 1960s): Beautifully animated in a style distinct from anime, this is a simple folktale adaptation. Fully on YouTube, albeit in its original english dub who's quality is frankly not great.

Next! (UK, 1990s): Stop motion short by an animator who specifically explores subtler, harder to animate expressions, as well as the art of theater, represented here by a Shakespear puppet playing out his works as a one-man show.

Ramayana (India, 1990s): Animated version of the legend of the same name, coupling a Ghibli art style with your ancient legend's large scale battles and polite heroes.

Ne Zha (China, 2010s)(trailer): that trailer is dead serious, it's actually a pretty damn silly movie! Including this one because as a big CGI animated film it's interesting to compare to what Pixar/Dreamworks/etc is doing.

...I'm realizing that I included a whole lot of animated folk tales so for modern chinese animation I'll also name Legend of Hei (2020s)(trailer), an original fantasy film with indie origins and a whole lot of over the top action.

As for films from the US that do NOT match that style? As a country the US has a rich history of animation asides of Disney! I personally grew up on Tex Avery and Looney Tunes cartoons who (pre-90s) are great examples of this.

For more adult films, I'll link my list of mature animation recommendations!

My ask remains opens for any clarifications :) have a nice day!

[jaywonjuice]

hiii! i saw your requests were open! i was wondering if you could write a jake drabble/scenario where the reader and him get into an argument and instead of making him sleep on the couch, the reader voluntarily does so instead and the aftermath (apologies) afterwards? hopefully that makes sense ☺️ thank you so much in advance and i’m looking forward to it!!

~ 🩵

aaa my first ever request !! :3 tysm for this, i thought it was a rly sweet idea and i rly rly hope you like how the piece turned out !<3

timeless. ~ s.jy

pairing bf!jake x gn reader

genre angst, fluff, oneshot

warnings verbal fight, physical contact, kissing, mention of drowning

wc 1.27k

[00:00] you watched as the alarm clock on your nightstand ticked over midnight and beeped into the darkness. you hugged your knees to your chest, feeling as if you were glued to this spot, huddled up in the middle of the bed. a lump began to form in your throat.

he forgot.

you and jake had been dating for a year now, and to be truthful, it was the happiest you had been in a long time. through all the low points he’d been there, from staying up to cuddle with you on the sofa after the long hard days at your stressful job, to wiping away your tears with his gentle touch, refusing to leave your side until he saw you smile again. you honestly had to pinch yourself sometimes to check you weren’t dreaming, that he was really yours - your gorgeous, sweet, golden retriever boyfriend.

but he forgot. he’d forgotten your one-year anniversary. and you knew that it shouldn’t matter to you so much but it did. you’d waited hopefully all day for him to text or call, and when your phone finally buzzed you’d rushed to read the message excitedly.

jake🩶

should still make tn but schedule’s running late, prob won’t get there til like half 12 xxxxxxx

your heart had sunk. you’d really thought he might have something special planned in secret, a surprise date at a fancy restaurant maybe, so you hadn’t brought it up just in case. but now you felt like a fool, hopes crushed. he clearly wasn’t thinking about you. maybe he just didn’t love you anymore.

your spiralling thoughts were cut off abruptly by the sound of the apartment door opening and then latching shut softly. shortly afterwards a shadowy shape appeared standing in the doorway of the bedroom.

‘hey baby,’ said jake with a broad smile. entering the room he flicked the lights on, casually running his fingers through his hair and letting out a contented sigh, as if he hadn’t just crushed your heart. ‘i thought you might’ve been asleep. why are you just sitting here in the dark?’

his smile faltered as he took in your expression. you were staring at him dully with tired eyes. he thought you looked smaller than usual, sat hunched there, blanket wrapped around your shoulders in the middle of the bed. concern flickered across his features. ‘baby, has something happened?’

you scoffed, turning away from him. ‘“has something happened?” no, actually, as a matter of fact absolutely nothing happened all day.’

he regarded you, puzzled. ‘baby i don’t understand,’

‘today was our anniversary, jake,’ you answered him cooly. ‘we’ve been together for an entire year and you didn’t even remember.’

you watched as the realisation crept over his face.

‘oh gosh, yeah, it totally slipped my mind!’ he furrowed his brow, thinking. ‘let’s go to the movies tomorrow, hmm? a proper date, to celebrate,’ he offered with a smile.

‘no,’ you shot back without a moment’s pause. ‘it’s not the same. we can’t just do it tomorrow. it won’t be special, we’ve missed our chance.’

‘what do you mean it won’t be special?’ he scratched his head, clearly growing frustrated with the conversation. ‘we’d be doing the exact same thing just on a different day, it doesn’t make any difference.’

‘jake, this was important to me!’ you were shouting now, unable to remain calm with how easily he seemed to dismiss your feelings.

‘hey don’t yell at me!’ he put his hands up. ‘we can just go tomorrow can’t we?! seriously what is the issue here, all i want is to just be with you-’

‘well i don’t want to be with you!’ you spat.

his jaw worked. something about his gaze shifted, and his eyes hardened. you knew then that you’d hurt him.

‘just forget it,’ you huffed, pushing yourself up off the bed and making to storm out of room. jake stuck his arm out to block the door. ‘look, if you’d just listen-’

‘forget it, i said,’ you repeated yourself, pushing his arm out of the way before adding, ‘you’re good at that.’ with that you left the room, your blanket trailing behind you.

.❦.

[11:44] when you awoke on the sofa the following morning, it was to a sore back and a throbbing head. it had taken you hours to fall asleep and you felt anything but rested. your cheeks felt tight with the stains of dried tears, and as you sat up straight the events of the previous evening flooded your mind.

jake. as you remembered the wounded look on his face at your hurtful words, your heart ached, adding to your long list of pains. ‘such an idiot,’ you groaned, head in your hands.

berating yourself did little to relieve your discomfort however, so you dragged yourself up off the sofa and made your way blearily to the kitchen.

as you reached for the medicine cabinet, something stuck to the fridge caught your eye. a little envelope was tucked under one of your little puppy fridge magnets. removing it carefully, you turned it over in your hands to find your name scrawled on the back.

you opened it up and read:

morning angel,

you know i’m not good with words, but i need you to know how much i love you, and how sorry i am that i hurt you.

i should never have said the things i said. i know now how important this was for you and i should’ve been more understanding from the start.

it’s not that i don’t care, honestly it’s quite the opposite. i just want to celebrate every day that i get to spend loving you. you see, i think we’re timeless baby, no matter how long i’m with you i’m always going to be crazily in love with you, until we’re old and grey. no matter when someone asks me, now or fifty years from now, i’m gonna be telling them that you’re my baby, forever and always.

yours,

jake

p.s. i’m really sorry this is all in writing and not in person, but i had things scheduled all morning that i couldn’t get out of :( i promise i’m gonna make it up to you

p.p.s. i’m also sorry for my atrocious handwriting (you’re right, it does kinda look like a drunk spider slipped in ink and danced across the page)

the sheet of paper trembled in your hands.

‘y/n?’

you looked up with a jolt to see jake stood watching you by the door, his face fraught with concern. your eyes filled with tears as they met his, and he dropped his bags to the floor and rushed over to you. he pulled you into his arms, wrapping them tightly around you.

‘jake,’ you were sobbing into his chest now. ‘jake i’m so sorry. i’m so so sorry.’

‘shhh, i know baby, i know,’ he stroked the back of your head gently. ‘i’m sorry too.’

still a sniffling mess, you continued ‘i do want to be with you, i want to be with you forever and.. i want to be timeless with you.’

you tilted your head up to face him, eyes shining. ‘please,’

he held your face in his hands as he leant in to kiss you, his thumb brushing against your cheek gently. the way he kissed you made you feel like you were both alive and burning all at once, like he was a breath of fresh air, like you were drowning. when he finally pulled away, he smiled, running his thumb along your puffy bottom lip, before replying softly ‘yeah, timeless sounds good to me.’

pls don’t hesitate to send me requests ! i love writing these sm ⸜(｡˃ ᵕ ˂ )⸝♡

©jaywonjuice | do not copy or re-upload my work on any platform

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

Hi!! I sorta get the vibe that maybe Rook has some deep rooted trauma from his childhood?? Just because of how secretive he is; i know hes eccentric but i feel like it’s more than that. A lot of ppl are upset at Vil for “changing” Rook somehow but i feel like rook changed his appearance to match with Vil, moved to pomefiore, etc. because HE wanted to be more like Vil, i feel like him meeting Vil was a rly big turning point for him. And with how upset he was at having to hurt dream Vil and Neige (and his fanboy bedroom😭😭) i feel like he’s really dependent on both of them for his happiness and he’s avoiding dealing with some traumatic experience, but this could be a stretch. I was wondering what your thoughts were. Sorry this was so long, have a nice night!!🫶

Mmm, maybe? There's certainly nothing to disprove the idea, although there also isn't much to support it. Rook doesn't strike me as someone who is scared or put off by most things. He was very much able to keep his calm and composure even in demanding, high-stress situations like the STYX base raid in book 6 and the rescue operation in Endless Halloween Night. If he has experienced something dangerous and/or dark, he gives me the impression that he could handle himself just fine. (This isn't to downplay trauma; I'm just saying that Rook could very well be the type of person that reacts and copes well with it.) As for him being secretive, it could be for other reasons such as his family's line of work (which is implied to be pretty important, since they have warp pads and villas all over Twisted Wonderland). This would be reasoning similar to why Jade and Floyd's father's occupation is kept dubious. Rook's secretive nature could also be an intentional diversion (ie purposefully playing "the fool") so it's easier for his targets to lower their guards around him or not take him seriously. Really, there's many reasons for his enigmatic and eccentric attitude. I'm also of the opinion that you don't necessarily need to have a deep-rooted trauma to get deep into fandom or stan culture. Sometimes you just get really into something and want to dedicate your entire being to that which holds your attention! For Rook, that's Neige and Vil--and it hurts him on a deep level to have to harm those who have brought him so much joy. I liken it to like... how TWST fans have merch shrines dedicated to their favorite boys. Non-Twsties may not understand our love and dedication to these characters, nor why we may get upset if those merch shrines are destroyed or damaged.

I think a lot of Rook's emotional attachment to Neige and Vil doesn't come from "relying" on them to fill in some void within himself. Rather, the behavior stems from him literally viewing them as pinnacles of beauty, combined with his own reverence for beauty itself and how they've helped his own character development. We know that, as a child, Rook struggled to express himself and was first introduced to the magic of the arts when he watched a play that starred Neige. The performance and show must have deeply resonated with Rook. Later on, we see that he, as a first year Savanaclaw student, acts much closer to the Rook we know of today. Invasive, bright, speaking his mind in a verbose way, etc. This makes me think that it was through stanning Neige that Rook was motivated to express himself in a more open manner. Then, when Rook meets Vil, he's inspired and encouraged to beautify himself so as to be like the works of art he already admires. As you've said, Vil isn't the one forcing change on Rook; instead, Vil gives the suggestion and Rook becomes enraptured with the idea--to the point where he changes dorms against Vil's advice. This is another huge turning point in Rook's life. He changes dorms, becomes Vil's right-hand man, and drastically changes his appearance too. This is all so he can be closer to the "beauty" he wishes to see, so he can fully dedicate himself to that chase. Neige was the impetus that started it all, and Vil is the one who motivated Rook to go "above and beyond" in his pursuit of beauty. So thinking about it, Rook has gone on his own journey of personal growth, and Neige and Vil are both closely tied to that. It's like how some of us TWST fans have been with the game for a few years now. We've grown and changed, and TWST has been with us every step of the way. I bet you're a totally different person today than you were when you first came across your current hyperfixations. That's bound to deepen the emotional connection we already have with the object of our affections--be it TWST for us, or Neige and Vil for Rook, no trauma necessary. From all of that, I get the impression that Rook cherishes Neige and Vil because he has "grown up" with them and they're so pivotal to who he is and has become as a person. When he has to turn his arrow on them, it may hurt him in the sense that he's destroying his passions or the very figures who have inspired him to come as far as he has. That's how I interpret it!

I still think it's fine to headcanon whatever you want for Rook's past though! There's no harm in filling in the gaps with whatever you think suits the character or the story.

[tacticaldiary]

just found ur account, u post some rly awesome stuff. i was just wondering if you could write a fic for either the 141’s ghost or price in an established relationship with the reader and they forgot the readers birthday?

Forget Me Not

Pairing: Simon 'Ghost' Riley x Reader

Genre: Hurt No Comfort

Simon's a sharp man. He can't afford to be anything less, lest he ends up with a bullet in his back but it's most often the more mundane and meaningful things that slip his mind. Her birthday, for example.

Masterlist

There wasn't an expectation to go all out for every little celebration in their lives. Both Simon and her were relatively quiet people, preferring to keep celebrations more intimate between them. A small gift for an anniversary, a walk along the beach. It was the little things that were the most special to her, they showed her that grandeur and big gestures weren't the only means of expressing love so deep and devoted.

But never had it come to one of them completely withdrawing.

Their birthday were a slightly more lively affair, having more people involved. Simon, of course, was not particularly fond of having his own but hers? In the past he'd arranged surprises for her on the day, whether that be contacting her family and friends or pulling her out of bed in the morning with breakfast he'd made just for her.

It's why it's so surprising to see him go about his morning like a completely normal day.

He'd kissed her in the morning, no different than how he does every day, went about the house gathering his gear for work that day. Nothing special, just a debrief he needed to attend in the afternoon.

"You'll be going in today?" She asks, unable to keep the slight frown off her face. Her coffee cup is set on the counter with a small 'clink.'

He nods, leaning down to lace up his boots. "Got a debrief at noon. Johnny's been yapping our ears off about a new bar he found so I've no doubt he'll find a way to drag everybody there afterwards." He rolls his eyes but she can tell it's in a fond way.

As disinterested as Ghost might act, she knows he's fond of his team.

Ghost nods, straightening up once he's done with his boots. "Don't wait up for me. Might be a while till I'm back." She watches, a little stunned as he leans down to press a kiss to her forehead before hitching his bag over his shoulder.

Oh.

She didn't think he'd...forget.

"Are you sure you're not forgetting something?" She asks half thinking he's playing some sort of joke on her. He couldn't have forgotten...right? Simon was normally so good with these things. He'd never forgotten before. "Something else that's today? Something important, maybe?"

He gives her a blank look, coming to a stop next to her. "Nothing important enough to remember." He responds, pulling out his keys.

She knows he doesn't mean it like it sounds to her, but that doesn't stop the pang of sudden hurt. Nothing worth remembering?

He was probably trying to be funny with that dry humour of his, but after waking up to him already out of bed, excited to spend the day with him, finding out he'd be going to spend some time in some bar instead of with her today...

It really does sting.

She knows she could call out to him, just tell him that it's her birthday today, but part of her just...doesn't want to. If it wasn't worth remembering, maybe she should celebrate by herself this year...

He calls out a goodbye. The front door opens. Shuts close behind him.

Silence.

She draws in a long, slightly shaky breath and picks up her coffee mug, willing the stinging in her eyes to recede.

                                 · · ─────── ·𖥸· ─────── · ·

Simon's had a pretty smooth day so far, which is something that almost never happens. The debrief went smoothly confirming that the Russian intel they'd spotted the other day had been solid enough to warrant the extraction op the team was to take in two weeks time. The bar Johnny had been so eager to show them hadn't been half bad either.

The decor was old 80's themed, a nice polished mahogany bar spanning the entire length of a wall. Ghost had taken to sitting down with a whiskey, watching Price and Gaz play pool while making idle conversation with Johnny sat by his side.

Well, 'conversation' was a generous word. It was mostly Johnny doing the talking with him answering every now and then, or chiming in with a hum to show he was still listening.

"I'm surprised your still hear, you know." Johnny says, shaking his head as he takes another sip of his drink.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Had a fight with the missus?" Gaz's voice joins in, the other two having wrapped up their game. He orders a drink for himself before sliding into the stool next to Ghost. "Got to agree with Soap on this one. I'm bloody surprised you're in deep enough shit to spend the night here instead."

Ghost stares at them like they're stupid. Maybe they are, because neither of them are making a lick of sense to him.

"What the fuck are you talking about?" He drains the last of his whiskey, not missing the look exchanged by the other two men.

"Mate-" Gaz says incredulously.

"Nah, he's not that daft." Soap cuts him off. "He's just fucking with ya."

Gaz narrows his eyes at Ghost. "I don't think he is."

"He's gotta be. Everyone knows-"

"Will either of you spit it out?" He sets his glass down on the table with a little more force than necessary.

"Bloody hell, you did forget." Gaz whispers. "Oh, you're a dead man." Soap recognising the frustrated twitch of Ghost's hand decided to blurt it out before hands get thrown.

"It's your lass' birthday today." Soap says. "Don't tell me ya forgot."

Ghost go through a rush of feelings all at once.

First in disbelief. He's not stupid, of course he'd remember something as simple as a birthday, especially hers. The second is doubt, because the look on Gaz's face is one so full of pity it makes him uncomfortable.

Ghost pulls out his phone to check the date and...

Shit.

The third feeling is disbelief. There's no way he just forgot. Someone must be fucking with him.

"Are you sure you're not forgetting something?"

"Nothing important enough to remember."

The barstool scrapes as dread and guilt twist his gut. Grabbing his coat, he makes for the door without another word, cussing out Johnny for the cackle he laughs behind his back as he leaves in more of a hurry than anyone's ever seen him.

8pm. He'd spent the entire day taking the piss with the guys on the one day that should have been dedicated to her.

He'd been away for so long, arriving home only a few days ago and he'd just...left her again. Granted, those few days being so busy had been out of his control but still. That wasn't an excuse, he decides, turning on the car.

He hadn't been busy today, and had had the time to go back home to her after his debriefing.

His hands tighten around the steering wheel.

                                 · · ─────── ·𖥸· ─────── · ·

Her earrings glint under the light of their bedroom. Staring at herself in the vanity, admiring the gorgeous dress her friend had gifted her for today, she can't help but feel a lack of excitement for the upcoming night.

Simon has really forgotten. She'd come to terms with it a couple hours ago when the sun had finally set and she'd realised that it wasn't a joke. He'd really, truly forgotten.

Going out partying hadn't been the plan at all, but when he friends had come over to give her a hug and presents, they'd seen her upset, still in her house clothes and decided it was completely unacceptable for her to spend the day like that.

Ushered into getting ready, they'd made plans to meet at this new upscale fancy restaurant before hitting a few clubs on the way back home.

Better than nothing, she reminds herself, chasing away thoughts of what her night might have looked like if Simon had stayed. No time for sulking, this was supposed to be a happy day. She was supposed to be happy.

So why does she feel tears sting at her eyes when she reaches for her purse to check if she has everything? Blinking them away, she takes a second to compose herself.

The key jingle in the lock, the sound echoing from the hallway into their bedroom. She tenses in surprise. Was he home?

Hope blooms in her chest. If Simon was home, maybe he did remember? Maybe he came home early to-

No.

No that wasn't right, she chides herself, smile slipping off her face. Even if he did remember now, that's not an excuse for forgetting the rest of the entire day, for leaving her feeling so shitty and going off to drink with the others.

Straightening her spine, she takes a deep breath and heads for the door. Her feet take her halfway down the hall before the front door flies open on its own, baring the man in question.

His knuckles are white with how hard he's gripping his keys, and some of the tension in his shoulders relaxes when he lays eyes on her. Something akin to relief, as if he might have thought she wouldn't be there when he got home.

"I-"

"Early night?" She straightens out her dress, feeling his eyes on her. He's quiet for a beat, assessing the situation before acting. Ever the soldier. "Mine's just starting." Her voice is as even as she can make it.

Simon shuts the door behind him. "I didn't realise-"

"That's right." He doesn't get to speak right now, doesn't get to fill her mind with pretty apologies and promises. Not this time, not tonight. "You forgot, Simon." A flash of guilt in his eyes makes her feel a pang in her chest she refuses to let take the reigns. "You forgot." She wavers for a moment, clears her throat to regain some control. "Nothing important enough to remember, right?"

It's a punch to the gut, hearing his words thrown back at him with the knowledge of how she interpreted them. His jaw clenches, frustrated at himself for letting something like this slip by him. "I'm going to make it up to you, yeah? Just let me-"

"No thanks." She shakes her head.

"Just let me finish," He narrows his eyes, a little irked at being cut off over and over again.

"No, Ghost." The way he tenses at his name being abandoned for his callsign is proof enough of how he's fucked up. "I don't want to hear it, alright?" She swallows. "I don't want to hear any of it, I'm going out, I'm going to have a good time on my goddamn birthday with my friends, and I'm not going to let you make me cry before I leave."

Cry? It's then that he notices how red her eyes are. Guilt slams into him hard enough to wind him, it worms it's way through his chest and eats him alive, gnawing on the little parts of his heart that haven't gotten calloused.

The first thing he notices when he walked in was how gorgeous she looked. Standing there in front of him in that dress, he's well familiar with most of her clothes, having been the one taking them off at the end of the day, but this one he hasn't ever seen before and it hugs her just right, enough to make his mind blank for a moment when he first walked in.

But he understands. Ghost sees the way she's clutching onto that purse of hers, the way her knuckles are white and the slight shake of her shoulders.

She's trying not to cry.

Because of him.

Fucking hell, that hurts. But not as much as what he's made her feel. Simon wants to argue, wants to tug her close and make it all better, but he sees that she means it, and hell does she deserve to have a good time after the way her morning went.

Simon steps aside with a tight nod.

Letting out what almost is a small, shaky sigh of relief, she brushes past him on the way out and Simon really doesn't have enough self control, because his hand wraps around her elbow to halt her in her tracks.

"I'm sorry, love." He says, so gently, so quiet. Such a stark difference to how he usually is. "I really am. And I will make it up to you, yeah? I promise."

A tight knot forms in her throat, threatening to send a fresh wave of tears at her conflicted feelings. It's all she can do to give him the barest of nods, avoiding his eyes.

"Don't wait up for me. Might be a while till I'm back." She echoes his words from the morning back to him before she shakes off his grip and leaves him alone.

An empty house, a mind full of buzzing remorse.

Requests Are Open! Reblog, Reply and Like!

(11/07/2023)

[lulureadsandwrites]

hellloooooo!!!

hope youre doing well:) can i request a jd x fem reader with body dysmorphia or anorexia? mine is getting rly bad but if you are triggered by this dont worry about it!!

tysm and love ya;)

hello yes, it's not triggering for me at all! i was actually thinking about this like a month or two ago! i hope you get better, if you need to talk my inbox is open!

"I Just Want to Help." "What If I Don't Want Help?" (J.D. x G.N!Reader)

summary; j.d. notices everything, especially when it comes to you. imagine his surprise when he catches on to your eating disorder warnings; eating disorder, body dysmorphia, swearing, talk of mental help and illness, not wanting to be better word count; 1.6k

2nd person

You had expressed to J.D. how you wanted to lose some weight and he encouraged you, but he also made sure you were comfortable. He wanted you to know you were perfect no matter what, because you were. He would tell you, “If you want to lose a few pounds that’s fine, you’re beautiful no matter what.” and he would kiss you, he would hold you close.

Now, J.D. is a very observant guy, especially when it comes to you. He was obsessed with you. So when you were skipping meals, he noticed pretty quickly. Of course he did.

He also saw the way you looked at yourself whenever faced with a mirror, or seeing a photo of the two of you, or anything that had to do with looking at yourself. He noticed how you’d cross your arms to cover your stomach, how you would close your thumb and pinky around your wrist, and lift your thighs slightly off whatever you were sitting on. He noticed you started exercising excessively and all the colour had drained from your skin. He noticed how you seemed to have forgotten important things, how you always looked lightheaded, how you were pulling out clumps of your own hair. He noticed how you would never let him touch you anymore, like the thought of his touch disgusted you. You acted like you were allergic to food, you’d drink at least 10 glasses of water a day.

Everything small or large, he noticed!

There was one mirror in your room and it had been flipped around to face the wall. When he asked you about it, you said you didn’t notice and he left it at that even though he knew you were lying.

J.D. was concerned. You, his partner, the person he loved the most, was practically killing themselves over something so small?

At least that’s how it was in his eyes. It wasn’t small to you, no not at all. It took over your whole life. You wanted to look like the girls in the magazines, or the popular girls at your school. You envied them, you hated them, you were angry that they got to eat whatever they want and they would stay under 105 pounds.

It all felt so unfair, what made you so different? Why did you have to deal with the humiliation of wanting to buy a bag of candy and feel like others were watching you in contempt and disgust?

You wanted to tell your boyfriend, you loved him and you wanted him to help but you were so ashamed. You didn’t want anyone to notice, you didn’t want to be a bother. Yet at the same time, you had prayed that J.D. would find out and help you get better.

You hated how exhausted this made you, you felt your thoughts contradict themselves all the time. You wanted to be healthy, to be better, but at the same time, you didn’t feel sick enough. You wanted to be worse. It didn’t start out like this, you didn’t intend to stop eating all over, it started with skipping some dinners, then breakfasts, then using the excuse of not having enough money to pay for lunch. J.D. would offer you money, saying it wasn't too expensive but you declined every single time.

After some time, you were repulsed at the thought of food, looking at it made you nauseous. Yet, seeing other, thinner people, eating made you jealous.

He couldn’t just tell you to eat, no that wouldn’t work. So he did the next best thing, he guilted you into eating. The next time you came over to his place, he had made sure he made a bunch of things to eat. Sure, it was a little manipulative, but it was the best he could think of doing.

“I made food for us.” He told you, holding a pot of baked macaroni and cheese.

“Oh, I’m not really that hungry. Thank you though Honey.” You sighed, you had done so well, you were doing perfect actually, you didn’t need all this. You just wanted to finish your homework and sleep.

“Not hungry? You haven’t eaten all day.” He pointed out to you, making you nervous. Had he really noticed?

“Yeah well…” You were going to give an excuse but J.D. quickly cut you off.

“Do you not like my cooking? Is it that? Is it not good enough for you? You’d rather starve than eat anything made by me?” He pestered, trying to be as frustrating and guilt-inducing as possible.

“No, no of course not!” You try to reassure him, he didn’t need the reassurance though. This was going exactly how he wanted it to.

“Well it really seems like it right now, can you at least try it?” He slides you a plate and a fork.

You sighed, giving in. If it made J.D. happy, you’d do it.

So that continued for a few weeks. Every few days you’d go to J.D. 's house, he’d cook something for the two of you and if you declined, he’d guilt you into eating it. You were starting to get a little upset that he kept doing that, you eventually realised that he was guilting you into this, so you confronted him about it.

“J.D., why do you keep guilting me into eating the food you cook?” You confront him, after he does the same routine to you this evening. He sighed and put the dish of leftover stuffing and turkey from Thanksgiving on the table.

“Because you’re making me feel like you don’t like what I make for you.” He excused, putting on a subtle frown, but enough for you to notice.

“No, that’s not it. What’s the actual reason?” You cut through his bullshit and stare at him with your arms crossed and a sour expression.

“You don’t fucking eat, [Name]. If I’m not giving you food, you don’t eat. That isn’t healthy!”

“Yeah, well neither is having a slushy every other day!” You counter, how were you supposed to take advice from him of all people?

“You can’t starve yourself, you’ve collapsed with me like 3 times in the past month! God knows how many times you do when I’m not with you!” He says, exasperated.

You were silent, stunned even. You didn’t know what to say, and you didn’t want to affirm his reasoning. He was never like this though, he never outwardly expressed his concerns for you, even though you knew he still cared.

“I’m not even gonna try that ‘Do it for me.’ bullshit because I know it’s not going to do anything. If anything, do it for yourself! You’re sick. You’re destroying your metabolism. If anything, not eating is going to do the opposite of what you want!”

You stayed silent for a moment. You were both silent, until he started to speak again.

“I get you’re insecure, my love, but you’re not handling this the right way. You’re not being healthy.” He tries to reason with you, trying to understand that you’re probably also not in a good mental state at the moment.

“Since when did you care about being healthy? Last time I checked, you destroy everything around you, including yourself. So why do I have to take health advice from you?” You pushed an accusatory finger to his chest.

J.D. was getting a little frustrated with your excuses, he didn’t want you to stay like this. It was bad for the both of you and now it was causing you guys to fight.

“Because,” He let out a frustrated sigh, he held his face in his hands and ran them up through his hair. “I hate seeing you like this! You’re the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen and you’re shrivelling up your body to meet these unrealistic standards! You might never have the body of a model, and guess what [Name]? That’s okay!”

“No, it’s not okay, it’s unfair!”

“What’s unfair is what you’re doing to yourself. You won’t even let me touch you, I want to worship you and you’re pushing me away…”

“Why?” You give up on the yelling match, you needed to give in because you knew J.D. He’d keep this going until you couldn’t talk.

He sighed and a small smirk found its way on his face. He was happy you were finally giving in.

“Because I love you, darling. You helped me, so I’m trying to help you. You’re the only one I can trust and I want you to trust me too.” His hand lightly grazes your left shoulder, he looks at you for the ‘Okay’ to touch you.

You nodded slowly and his small smirk turned into a wide smile. He instantly wrapped you in his arms, he kissed your temple and held you so your back was pressed against his chest. J.D. was relieved that you would finally let him touch you again, and even better, you were enjoying it.

“I do trust you.” You let your eyes close on you as you lean into J.D. He pressed a few kisses to your neck and you sighed as you felt his breath against it.

“What can I do to help you? You tell me.”

“I don’t know…” You admitted, you didn’t know what to do about this.

“How about we start with talking about this, okay?”

“Okay.”

[butch-reidentified]

1. What is a woman?

Argument for Using "Cis-Identifying"

And related: A conversation with a "NERF" about radical feminism, gender identity ideology, and what we/I actually believe.

2. Inform yourself on some of the work I've done for trans people before you continue the trend of cowardly hypocrisy.

3. My thread responding to the way much of the tumblr trans community handled my sharing my story of surviving the 2016 Pulse Nightclub shooting (often by stealing my lived trauma and removing my url) is easily one of the most - if not the most - important posts pertaining to trans discourse I've made to date, and Tumblr won't let me pin it. Of course. So here it is. And a bonus: This lovely ask.

4. Hope for Women (this is a very new project, WIP)

About Me:

I am a butch lesbian, married to a badass gnc (but not butch) radfem lesbian goddess whose misandry surpasses even my own; she does have tumblr but rarely uses it - @psychichologramnightmare is hers. I'm 27/Taurus/May baby, though I'll be real, I've never liked astrology and found my birth chart n whatnot always laughably wildly inaccurate to me (sorry astrology girlies). Former competitive rock climber, still in love with hiking and climbing. Wilderness survivalist. Trained & armed woman, advocate for female-only firearm ownership.

My wife and I run our own business, and bought our first home together at 24 & 25 respectively - it's a lovely 4/3 on a quarter acre where we have 5 mango trees and more, plan to start growing our own food and herbs, foster kittens, and provide free housing (and more) regularly for those in need. We do a LOT of IRL feminist action/work/organizing. I post about some of that work pretty often, but I couldn't possibly post about all of it (even if it were safe to do so). I am basically organizing (mostly offline, but some online as well) full-time now.

Survivor of abuse, CSA + captivity, trafficking in my teens where I was forced into porn as a minor, the Pulse Nightclub shooting in Orlando 2016, and more. I am no longer affected by any of these in any negative psychological manner. I own my past, every moment of it, and wouldn't change a thing I've experienced. What I often tell people is, "I'm not glad it happened; I'm glad I was there."

I got my Bachelor's in Neuroscience/Neuropsych, used to work in a top neuro research lab, and have been a coauthor on a peer-reviewed scientific journal publication. I wrote my undergraduate thesis on POTS, ADHD, some of the relevant epigenetics, and norepinephrine dysregulation. I was diagnosed with Ehlers-Danlos & POTS in 2015, before pretty much anyone had heard of them (including most doctors). My POTS is very well-managed now, but chronic pain from EDS is more of a struggle.

I practice witchcraft as a form of artistic expression. I don't consider myself spiritual as I've had a lifelong inability to "believe," but I am particularly passionate about lesbian-centered/lesbian-exclusive (esp butch & gnc lesbian) witchcraft. I am open to commissions for spell jars/sachets on a purely donation basis (we recently were victims of identity theft and are still struggling to recover, but I'll do them for free happily). This is essentially artistic expression to me, something to express love and sisterhood - why I'm not actually charging or anything and will even pay shipping and materials myself if you'd like one but don't want to/can't donate. To me, it's very similar to commissioning a painting or something of the sort, and I deeply enjoy the process of making them, esp for other women, the love that goes into doing so. See tags: #witchcraft, #brujeria.

Adoptee with complex history. Adoption-critical but not abolitionist - I plan to adopt with my wife in a couple years. I've talked a fair bit about my experiences, adoption trauma, ethical adoption, and more. Check out my tags such as #ethical adoption, #adopted, #adoptee, and so forth (tagged on this post for easy accessibility).

I spent many years surrounded by majority-trans-identifying friends/acquaintances both irl and online, deeply involved in trans spaces & activism, and even identified for a bit & was on T for a while. I am not "uneducated" or unfamiliar with trans-identifying people, their experiences, or gender identity ideology in general. You, like me back then, very probably have been lied to about radfems ("terfs") and what we believe and fight for. I am happy to talk in good faith (provided you do the same) 1 on 1 with anyone who is curious about what we actually believe and what we stand for, what common radfem takes on gender identity ideology & trans identity actually are and why.

I have a history of purely physical sex dysphoria (physical sensation like pain or itching). I got "top surgery" (elective mastectomy) due to this and other reasons: constant painful breast cysts & very large breasts (DDD even when I weighed under 100 lbs). I was not trans-identifying by the time I got this surgery (though I tried to briefly identify as nb/transmasc just bc I felt obligated, but hated it). I have never wanted to be a man socially and genuinely hated the very thought. I came out the womb feminist, got in trouble throughout primary school for fighting boys who tried to pull sexist bullshit, always lowkey believed in female superiority (I mean just look at our biology, lifespans, pain tolerance, the things we've done throughout history despite violent patriarchal oppression...). I spent years preparing myself. I read from & spoke to women who regretted this surgery, challenged myself at every turn, dove deep into my mind and thought processes, tried alternative treatment attempts, worked with a non-affirming therapist, made sure my past traumas were fully healed, and waited until I was in my mid-twenties so my brain was more or less fully matured. I have no regrets about it. I still have some (still purely physical sensation) dysphoria ("phantom male genitals" type of thing) at times, but have come to manage this very well. More on this here.

Formally assessed psychopath & participant in research by leading psychopathy experts (read on before jumping to conclusions). Check out this post and my #psychopathy tag (tagged on this post for easy accessibility) for info, particularly about high-EQ female psychopathy, & to find out everything you think you know about us is wrong 💕 (what you know about male psychopaths is usually right tho 💀)

Note: When it comes to politics, I strive to discuss exclusively that about which I am *uniquely knowledgeable* - by which I mean, essentially, that I (believe I) have something to contribute that is unlikely to be found on every other blog. I do not and will not make posts or reblog posts about topics I do not feel this way about. You are not entitled to know my views on every hot-button issue, and I have no intention of speaking on that which I know little about, or that I don't know enough about (through study or personal experiences) to contribute something you can't get a thousand other places.

Tag Guide (WIP):

#mine -> original posts, including ask responses

#ask -> ask responses only

#anon hate, #anon love -> should be self-explanatory. anon love does include some non-anon love for simplicity.

#catposting, #dogposting, #petposting -> images of cats, dogs, and both, respectively (not always my own)

#Wilder wives -> posts pertaining to me & my wife (last name Wilder)

#mvawg, #mvaw, #male violence -> male violence against women/girls

#ethical adoption -> my takes as an adoptee on the issues within the adoption industry & how adoption can be done ethically

#what we believe -> fairly new tag for posts trying to educate on what radfeminism is actually about/damage control for disinformation & misinformation about it

#trans violence -> violence committed by trans-identifying people, including threats of and graphic violent fantasies (primarily misogynistic ones)

#trans misogyny, #trans lesbophobia, #woke misogyny, #woke homophobia, #woke lesbophobia, etc. -> what it says on the tin

[soulmvtes]

tmrw is my birthday + it's been a difficult year for a multitude of reasons but i am incredibly grateful for everything. this year has been especially important in the way that i feel like i'm starting to really see myself as a Real person who is allowed to get it wrong sometimes + not be perfect + can make mistakes which ik sounds like such a simple thing that we are all instinctively aware of but has been difficult for me to actually put in practice in my life. i've always felt it hard to advocate for myself but i feel like the year has allowed me to rly interrogate why i feel that + how i can be better to myself and therefore others bc i AM able to be loved despite. having lovely people around me has been such a blessing and i am so grateful for every single person who has showed up for me in any way this year whether it was a smile from a stranger, a hug from a friend or spending time laughing w my people, it has truly meant everything to me n i can't express my gratitude enough <3<3

[autisticlancemcclain]

fic rec friday 16

welcome the the sixteenth fic rec friday! where, on friday, i rec five of my favourite fics.  

1. home depot catalogue by @moonguilt

“No, really, he’d love to,” Lance said into the phone, just as Keith pressed the button for the kettle to start heating up.

Those words were enough to raise Keith’s suspicions just a tad. He shot Lance an inquisitive glance while opening the cabinet to retrieve his box of morning tea, but his husband was the picture of innocence, flipping casually through a Home Depot catalog they had received in the mail yesterday.

“Oh, definitely. If you need someone to paint your insides white, Keith’s your man.”

Keith dropped his box on the counter, tea bags spilling out onto the granite.

-----

Keith is having a normal, relaxing morning. Lance throws him a curveball.

this one made me LAUGH. out LOUD. it’s domestic and fluffy and FUNNY dear god, like it’s such a lance thing to do and such an objectively funny prank that i just!! literally just typing this makes the urge to reread it too great my hand has been forced.

2. kindling by @moonguilt

Lance struggles with his attraction to Keith during training, and it all comes to a head when Keith corners him afterwards to ask why he was off his game today.

Prompt from tumblr: Angry Kiss.

one of my fave vld tropes EVER is lance being whipped and then equally as furious that he’s attracted to keith at all. it’s endlessly funny to me. and then keith being the eyebrows raised, not surprised one??? gets me every time. also keith is a massive sweetheart in this fic and i love him

3. chocolate granola bars by @moonguilt

“A pillow fort sleepover!” Lance cried out, leaping up with such alacrity that Pidge had to grab her laptop to prevent it from sliding to the floor.

“No way, we're not—” Pidge stopped and blinked, exchanging a glance with Hunk, then looking back at Lance again. “... Oh.” She evidently had not been expecting such a tame suggestion. “Okay.”

-------------

Or, Lance is bored out of his mind and decides to organize a sleepover with the squad. Nonsense ensues, and Lance works through some confusing emotions—particularly those involving a certain mullet-haired team leader.

okay there are too many good things about this fic i cannot choose which to highlight, and so i will mention them all. ahem: a) lance is a ray of sunshine who regularly uses his power of cuteness to his advantage, b) adorable team bonding, c) shiro is a dorky nerd, d) HEALTHY LANCE AND ALLURA COMMUNICATION, e) krolia and romelle have actual characters, f) lance has allergies which isn’t rly important but he gives me a vibe that he’s allergic to several things and it’s very validating to see it in fic, g) lance validation and feeling expression for the piece of shit game show episode, h) observant lance!! and i) literally the most painful and necessary and well-written klance fight i’ve read in a while! hurt badly but was resolved wonderfully 10/10

4. Terminal Velocity by @speakswords [GORE WARNING]

The only fate worse than being tortured to death is watching, helpless, while the person you love most takes your place.

this is one of my fave vld fics of all time. although fair warning it is very violent for a good chunk of time. the story is EXCELLENT, the entire thing will have u biting ur nails in terrified anticipation and i mean that literally. whole time i was gagged. at the edge of my seat. AND i have several specific lines screenshotted bc the pure fucking devotion and care knocked me out of the water

5. you and me are cosmic dust by Yuu_chi

Knowing that your team loves and trust you no matter what and believing it are two very different things.

i LOVE keith angst. i know this fandom is very langst heavy and honestly i am too but sometimes keith angst is so so good. and this fic is one of them!! excellent read and features observant lance as well. OH and there’s a little sprinkling of suave keith in here too lol

that’s it for today!! i’ll see y’all back next friday for the next fic rec post!!!    

[single-malt-scotch]

Given we are two episodes in to bdubs this HC seasons I will ramble a tad about his format this season and the timeline/comparisons to past ones!

Let's talk in parts for a second. For thumbnails. I didn't really know what to expect tbh. He's been going more minimalist in thumbnails for a while now- HC S9 and Create have very simple thumbnails very focus on the builds (if they occur in the HC video). Go from season 7 HC to now and they've changed a Lot. S8 was simple too if you take away the color overlay. But S10 is mega simple. There isn't even a title on the thumbnails!

Then intros. S7 and S8 would randomly have an intro of "welcome to hermitcraft!" And sometimes none at all. S9 started "welcome to hoymicraf" (how do we spell this) consistently. Additionally all those seasons had some intros beginning with some third person camera to start a scene (more consistent as time went), or without that intro in season 7, 8 and 10 we'd also just start in first pov while bdubs is already in action. Additionally intro music was always very energetic, and so far what we heard in his first s10 intro (and based off the time lapses) we are getting something way more chill. Ep2's intro is one of those exceptions for the specific scenarios that happen sometimes. The choice of situational music.

General editing? Kinda crossed over with intros here because intros have very blatant editing with music and camera etc. Tbh the biggest thing to any season is music choice, which changes how things feel entirely. Past seasons had faster paced songs in intros and many building segments had orchestral, so on. The way those building segments play out has slowly turned into bdubs cutting it up to fit the beat of music, which is most apparent now in S10 and bwb S3. For S10 I feel like this enunciates the calm music even more as it puts emphasis on what is the louder/more striking note of the song. Through S10 episodes right now we have seen more use of replay mod in more than just the intro. Usually wide shots with music. Thought out compositions and wide shots often showing scale of things around him. Even purposefully taking moments to stop and pause and linger on the shot. Definitely more cinematic, and completely different with his it slows down.

It is interesting to see what some people might feel is a total 180! Considering I have seen the flow of his format for so long "slow" is not unfamiliar but because he has grown so much as a commentator he handles this very well. It's not "old inexperienced commentator" slow. Because you can tell if you pay attention he isn't different from who he has been in recent years. He's always the same and going this direction is done w the same level of development and experience. Hes still silly, he's still got energy. It's just presentation! It feels different a lot by how he's editing.

Even so it makes me wonder Why. Was his previous loud style and high energy more aimed at when his kids were just born and very little, and he had an obvious shift to making his videos possibly more appealing to children and be child appropriate? Has he 'mellowed out' for any particular reason? If you watch him a lot, especially his Livestreams (the member ones rly) bdubs thinks hard about his building skills. He is genuinely an artist aiming to improve every day and I think he's gotten a lot back into really expressing his thoughts and feelings regarding the art. It's been a gradual focus returning I have seen. Perhaps he has decided to lean into this more on purpose, and in doing so that shifts his focus away from what people felt was "childish" acting. But it's important to remember, as a bdubs lover, the analysis here isn't actually one to say he's "changed" because he hasn't. As a content creator he knows what he's going for and to some level has consciously made these changes. We still got bdubs, he's just doing it different. And honestly if you were turned off by the energy of S9, I highly recommend giving this season a watch if you want something more artistic, and good discussion about building process.

[astrolavas]

please PLEASE do go on about how autistic Hunter is. As a probably-neurotypical person I love to learn more about neurodiversity from people firsthand rather than textbooks it's so cool, plus media diversity rep is something so important, I did a whole project about it actually

OKAY, BET

he's just...... soooo autistic-coded, like there's NO way he's neurotypical lmao (there are of course some things that he does that can also come from his PTSD or his upbringing/growing up conditions rather than autism (or just both! since they might overlap) but there's just.. SO much stuff that's strictly autistic that like........ it's canon. canon to me.)

like, how dramatic he is at times? the entire hexside scene???

the moment where he comes up to that one random kid like "CLASSMATE. ignore the fact that we'd never met, how would you say abt [gets straight to the point where he tells him to join a coven and leave his friends and family forever in an overconfident cheerful manner]" LIKE THAT'S SOOO XKSJKSK the manner in which he said it, the way he just came up to that random person outta the blue, how he got straight to the point, like COME ON

and THIS????

"teens are probably into the same things as me! like authority. and rules!" BRO........

also how expressive his face is (especially how expressive it is for some emotions and schooled/subtle for certain others)

oftentimes his choice of words and the specific intonation in which he says stuff???? 💀 "stop acting foolish" "it will take more than that to thwart my mission" "that's sacrilege" okay grandpa let's get you to bed nxsjksk BUT LIKE. NO, EVEN THE INTONATION he uses in very casual sentences, it's very...... yeah

how much he likes to share fun facts and talk abt stuff he knows abt and is interested in (wild magic, titan's veins/eclipse lake, mindscapes...)? and how he sometimes stops himself mid-sentence before he says too much? that could definitely be interpreted as info-dumping and special interests

how much he loves research in general? i just KNOW he loves knowing stuff and reading up on stuff and memorizing cool fun facts (him immediately reading all the grimwalker books he could find after finding out that's what he is- like obviously he did that, obviously he wanted to know what he is. but also just..... it's so, so very huntercore)

taking things literally.. wanting clearer/more direct instructions on stuff......

“i don’t feel sick” 💀

him just turning around and walking away with no word right away after willow introduced the rest of the team

him not realizing emerald entrails rly didn't want to join the emperor's coven and not realizing he did sth wrong until later, when he noticed willow was upset

THE FREAKING. DELETED SCENE FROM CLOUDS ON THE HORIZON in which he automaticaly moved to climb the vines onto amity's balcony along with luz and didn't get why luz could possibly wanna be alone with amity before willow and gus stopped him. willow and gus saying "you'll understand when you're older" and then him arguing with flapjack how he IS older, JUST. LMAO....

the whole description of him as this...... “prodigy” and everything related to that (not necessarily a positive thing, considering how he was treated and described as by many adults)? the little intricacies of it.... hm

him being kinda bad at lying and making up stuff

and even his stance sometimes???? boy

and not just THIS one, but. many many different poses in which he stands sometimes. very hmmm hm

how direct he is?

also this is a headcanon/interpretation but him constantly wearing gloves? and him saying "why are you touching it [the selkidomus] with your hands? gross"? sensory issues. so real.

also the sounds he makes and his squeaks???? how he sometimes fidgets with his hands/thumbs?

and MORE, like there are also many many moments that can be interpreted as other autistic traits or behaviours, just. ALL OF IT.

the crew did say that they've written neurodivergence into the show and into who these characters are intentionally, even if they might not be aware of some terms or labels at times, so like... i’m 100% certain hunter’s purposely written to be neurodivergent. and i’m gonna be very surprised if not specifically autistic (+ ptsd ofc)

he just... is.

anyway...

[honeytonedhottie]

how to get over social anxiety☆ . °🎀

okay so i remember during freshman year i had manifested transferring to the school that i wanted to go to, and i literally couldn't socialize with ANYONE cuz i transferred 2 weeks late.

it was so difficult for me to make friends and i struggled SO much. i had the WORST social anxiety. but towards the end of the year i rly came out of my shell and i socialized, which made my school life 100x better and also gave me opportunities.

the importance of socializing - as human beings we r social creatures. if u hide urself away and isolate urself, studies have shown that self isolation has a higher mortality rate than smoking. when we socialize and meet as many people as possible we can access as many opportunities as possible.

exposure therapy literally works. i'd try to socialize with at least one person a day. or, start conversations with people at least once bcuz it was something that was rly daunting and intimidating for me before, but with practice i gained a rly great flow and i became a great conversationalist. also, starting this blog has rly helped me to be able to express myself better <3

a little tip when starting up conversations is to compliment them. when u just walk up to someone and say hi, i feel like that's SO awkward and doesn't make for a good conversation. instead find something ab them, for example ; maybe they're wearing a pretty hairclip, you'd say "omg i love ur hair clip, where'd u get it from?" that way at least u have something to talk about and it'd be easier to be friends with them. also, use their name when speaking to them bcuz our own names r the most beautiful sounding things to us, make an effort to remember and pronounce people's names properly, it makes all the difference <;3

if people are staring at you, dont immediately assume that its something that u should be insecure about. that's signs of low self concept which you'd need to fix. instead, flip ur thoughts and be like "they're staring at me cuz its like seeing an angel in the flesh" dont immediately assume every little thing to mean something bad, sometimes it might not be either of those things. sometimes we stare at people or things blankly without reason when we zone out. dont make urself a prisoner of ur own mind

[somerabbitholes]

hi hello c! i wanted to ask for book recs from you, for book centering arounf trains. be it the indian railways or any other. books about trains, set in the backdrop of railway systems and the like.

do you know of books like that? pls do tell me! i'm reading engines of change currently (a rec from you from your 'snippets i like' series which i rly miss btw) and would really love to nurture my love for trains.

hello hello! you've accessed a very specific subgenre i'm very fond of, so here you go:

The Great Railway Bazaar by Paul Theroux: Theroux does this thing where he travels across countries and continents exclusively on trains, and this one is about his travel across Asia. I read this one first, but also check out his other work: The Old Patagonian Express and Ghost Train to the Eastern Star in particular

Around the World in 80 Trains by Monisha Rajesh: also a travelogue, and exactly what it sounds like; it's pretty fun. She also has Around India in 80 Trains

Fire and Steam by Christian Wolmar: a history of the railway network in Britain and it's quite interesting

Eleven Minutes Late by Matthew Engel: a travelogue of train travel in Britain and Ireland

27 Down, edited by Ian J. Kerr: it's a collection of essays and articles about the railway network in India, its economic and social base and/or impact. It's a much more contemporary account than something like Engines of Change

Also, I know you asked for books, but I would recommend watching 27 Down, directed by Awtar Kaul. It's a sublime movie about a ticket checker who has had most of the most important events in his life happen on the train and be defined by trains. It's based on Ramesh Bakshi's Athara Sooraj Ke Paudhe, so if you read Hindi, please also check that out.

[kannra21]

I don’t understand why anime men can be drawn looking handsome while also looking normal and wearing normal clothes, but sososo often, anime women are drawn looking like their tits are going to pop out of their bras and/or they wear provocative outfits.

Do men (or male artists anyway) not care if a woman is beautiful if she isn’t being revealing? Do her facial features, the way she carries herself, her hair, etc. not matter so long as she’s not trying to act like a seductress?

From my own experience with men I can only say one thing- they are liars. Or at least they like lying to themselves.

They will oftentimes say that they don't like women who reveal feminine features, but they do. Men like women and they like objectifying them. Bc if men are straight, logically, they're attracted to women. Bc woman's body is pretty and not just in a sexual sense. Sometimes it's just pretty for looking at; like art, nude modeling and act. Worshipped even. Woman's body is prettier than man's body in so many ways. But I think this beauty shouldn't be so heavily sexualized like it's often the case in the east. Japan has so much explicit content that they even have categorized shops at every corner, in public spaces. I don't know how Japanese women feel about this but statistics show that their birth rate is slowly declining. Besides poor economic situation, women don't feel respected or loved enough. And the feminism has risen in this part of the world as well.

Anyways, back to the point- I respect Gege for keeping his characters neat and the story heavily plot oriented without much fanservice (men are the fanservice lol). Gege also says that his parents are reading the manga so I suppose he doesn't rly want to feel like a disgrace lmao. I'm not sure if this was his marketing strategy to interest women into shōnen genre but it definitely worked, now jjk has become one of the most popular series of all time. And it's ok to have Mei Mei as one token representative of a "sexy woman" stereotype although I wouldn't rly call her sexy either. She's just a beautiful woman.

What definitely helps the whole situation is Gege's taste in fashion. No male mangaka that I know ever paid attention to this one very important factor. Fashion is a type of expression, and it can tell a lot about the character themselves without incorporating their personality in words. With that said, jjk women have so much personality to them, it's fascinating.

Mei Mei and Mai could be considered sexy, Utahime is a traditional authoritative beauty, Nobara is very stylish and confident, Maki is a strong tomboy girl, Miwa and Momo are girly and cute, Ozawa is a shy girl, Shoko is your typical CEO woman, Yuki is a biker girl. And some of them have short or tied up hair which is nice bc it can be just as feminine as long hair. He even introduced women's insecurities like Ozawa being overweight and that Yuuji didn't mind bc he found her writing and table manners pretty. Momo's outlook on woman's prejudice in jujutsu world is also something important to adress. Yuuta is shown kissing Rika bc what they're having is true love and true love doesn't know shallow boundaries. Gege understands woman's struggle.

In an interview, Gege revealed that he has similar mindset to Megumi and that he doesn't want to sexualize women as much. The way he treats woman body is purely artistic. At least watching these panels didn't make me feel uncomfortable at all.

Regarding Mei Mei's and Ui Ui's relationship, yea it's a taboo. But I think that author didn't want to promote incest, rather, he wanted to show that Mei Mei is a woman with flaws. And flaws are something that makes a person interesting, together with their virtues. She also likes money. To the point that Gojo made fun of her by flipping a coin to summon her bc apparently, Mei Mei lacks self-respect.

In contrast to her, Utahime respects herself too much. That's why she's often hysterical and Gojo tells her that hysterics won't win men (Gojo is a real mansplainer huh).

Gojo is rude and so is Sukuna. But Miwa and Yorozu don't even notice a man's flaw if they're interested in him (Gege knows a woman's mind too well, which is funny). That's why he's asking ladies to vote for Nanami instead of Gojo in popularity poll (women should set aside shallow interests and concentrate on person's kind soul).

Unlike them, Shoko is aloof and rational bc she's too aware of fleetingness of life, especially in her line of work as a doctor. Sure, she can be friendly and smile a lot, but she doesn't want to form any strong relationships with anyone. This is the only way she can keep her sanity in check. After all, jujutsu is just a marathon where the finish line is a pile of friends' corpses. Something the younger generations are a bit immature to understand.

Nobara is a very stubborn girl, she sometimes comes off as too bossy or rude (Yuuji calls her a bitch lol). But it turns out this was only her defense mechanism with people she's unfamiliar with bc she didn't want to be underestimated for being a country girl of limited thoughts and experience. Bc Nobara is indeed a great girl with many talents.

Maki is a strong, independent woman but this doesn't mean that she refuses help and support from people around her. She likes guys who are stronger than her (and Yuuta comes into picture, besides, he also suggested that he wants to crush Zenin clan together which explains her liking to him). Panda noticed that and wanted to play a wingman. Although his boobs question (Maki's insecurity) was a bit inappropriate (but it got the point across), Yuuta's answer was very polite which made him more likeable in her eyes.

Yuki and Todo are similar bc they're nosy, they enjoy exploring different people's interests and judge them whether they're considered "a person of culture" (which adds to the series' comedic aspect). I love Haibara's answer bc he says "I like women who eat a lot" bc he knows that women who eat are happy and that a hungry woman is an angry woman.

Gege understands women so much that fans are contemplating whether Gege is actually a woman himself or not. It's nice to have a mangaka who's this mindful.

[river-blue]

RUSAME HEDCANONS🇺🇲🇷🇺

- Their relationship was a slow burn of them having to be civil towards eachother for the sake of everyone around them, slowly realizing they have things in common, slowly starting to hangout more on their own accord, realizing they may have more than platonic feelings for eachother (they were attracted to eachother for a while, they just thought it was hatred). The confession would be less of a confession and more of a boiling point where they both act on their feelings

- I think Russia actually would have realized his feelings first, he would just deny them for longer (internalized homophobia :/)

- Even after they act on their feelings, they wouldn't immediately be official, but they would get more flirtatious (really just America would be more flirtatious and Russia would tolerate it more). They would start going to eachother's houses more, not really going past making out or anything though.

- the way they become official is a casual conversion of America just being like "I actually really like you. So to be clear, you are my boyfriend." And Russia's just like "okay. Don't think that's how you're supposed to ask but. Okay."

- Also, I rly don't like when people make America in in the ship like uwu soft gay twink bottom...like that's just...not it. First off, if either of them are actually gay gay, it's Russia. Bro has never enjoyed a tit in his life. Secondly, they're both extremely strong, scary ass world superpowers (which is also partially why I think they work, they're on equal footing), neither of them are super submissive or twinks

- I think in the early stages of their relationship they were really bad at expressing their love through words, especially Russia. So, physical affection became more important to them. They would slowly improve on this, especially after they exchanged their first "I love you"s, but they're still much better with actions than words (they're also both touch starved so)

- !TW for references to sex! Listen, honestly this topic kinda makes me uncomfy but I do wanna share my headcanons...I said before I don’t view either of them as very submissive, this is true in general and in bed. They both view themselves as very dominant and act try to act that way. At the end of the day tho...not to get to graphic but, one of them has to take and it is America (usually). But he's like, very annoying about it, and still tries to be in charge. Also the reason it is America is in large part becuase Russia still has issues with his sexuality so Russia (usually) is more uncomfortable being in the other position. Okay back to our regularly scheduled program

- I actually don't have anything more rn, might add more later