#anyways please do not contact me for 3-5 business days

[tending-the-hearth]

i’m so unwell rn it’s not even funny

[incorrectbatfam]

Do the batfamily members ever get too into their undercover work? (Undercover in an office and theyre worried about spreadsheets, working in a warehouse and coming home complaining about missing parts)

Bruce: Status updates on your undercover missions. Dick, you first. What have you got down at the docks?

Dick: I haven't confirmed the Killer Croc sightings yet, but more importantly, our catch hasn't been measuring up to last year's. Tuna we're doing okay on, but the salmon population seems to be on the low end. I've contacted the Department of Wildlife and Fisheries but it'll be another 3-5 business days before they can come down and check it out.

Bruce: At least you're doing something to help. Jason?

Jason: Class was okay. I think the kids are warming up to me as their substitute while Mrs. Maloney is out on maternity leave. The average on the last vocabulary quiz was 83.53% so either I'm doing my job right or they need to be challenged. I'm worried about Tristan Lancy, though. He's normally a good student but his grades have been dropping recently and his parents don't seem like safe people to tell. I'll talk to him tomorrow and try to pair him up with a peer tutor if he needs it.

Bruce: Also see if he has any alternate contacts besides his parents. Tim, any updates at the chemical plant?

Tim: If by updates you mean OSHA violations, I could go on all week. We got a batch of new recruits today and they were just thrown into the work—no PPE, no safety training, nothing. This is what happens when you place production over employee well-being. I'm gonna file a complaint after this meeting. Also, I think the union will have something to say about the manager cutting people's lunch breaks short.

Bruce: I see. Damian? Please tell me you found something volunteering at the zoo.

Damian: Depends on how you define "found." While I have not obtained evidence of a mutant larvae black market, I did help some of the animals at the sanctuary make progress with their recovery. Bobo the monkey is healing from his broken arms and we're gradually getting him re-acclimated to climbing higher surfaces. Suzie the black bear was born a little prematurely but seems to be catching up to her peers in terms of growth. Lastly, we got a grant for additional wildcat research and enrichment. As an aside, we are having an educational seminar on European mountain goats this Friday at 3:30 and I expect all of you to be there.

Bruce: I'll put that on our calendars. Steph?

Steph: It's not really undercover work for me, just work. Anyway, yes the newest Batburger location is being used for money laundering. But I really need to vent about the customers for a sec. We don't open until 10 and at 9:30 this morning some moron was banging on our door demanding Jokerized cheese fries. Then right in the middle of the lunch rush, Janie got sick so I had to fill in as the cashier and it was hell. After that, I had to step in between a fight at the drive-thru because the customer claimed we only gave him nine pieces of his ten-piece Robin nuggets and tried to beat up the kid who took his order. And to top it all off, an entire high school hockey team came in five minutes before closing.

Bruce: Cass?

Cass, blowing balloons: Can't talk. Arranging bat mitzvah.

Bruce: Duke, you're my last hope.

Duke: Margie's bringing a peanut butter chocolate cake to the bake sale. I swiped her recipe and we can easily beat her. Her ganache is way too watery and just runs off the top of the cake, which isn't even leveled. She's also trying to do something with a raspberry filling that isn't working at all. It's like she couldn't decide on what to bring. The bake sale committee also asked if we can bring some apple pies because the original baker has to go out of town for a family emergency. I think we'll win if we bring them with some ice cream and a touch of caramel, even though this isn't a contest.

Bruce: Thank you. At least our most critical case has been taken care of.

Barbara: ...I'll save my book launch for later.

[sugarcoated-lame]

*no sounds just silent screams*

i like to think you tag these things then giggle knowing i’m gonna see them 🤭💗

*this contains smut, 18+ minors dni 🧡

@sebsxphia seb 💗💗💗 hello, my love! this has been sitting in my inbox for way too long, i am the worst i’m sorry for answering it so late 😭😭

but ok i’m not gonna lie… you’re so right, i literally do giggle sometimes when i reblog these things from you knowing that you’re gonna see my tags LMAO 😂🤭❤️

so that being said haha, forced eye contact with Joel…. yeah 🫠

I definitely think that soft dom Joel looooves gentle forced eye contact. Loves when you go all shy on him, your head tilting back, eyes drifting up toward the ceiling as he kneels at the edge of the bed between your parted thighs.

Strong, rough hands caressing your outer thighs as his plush lips trail sweet kisses and little love bites all along your soft skin, inching closer and closer to your core.

He soothes one of the bites with his tongue before murmuring into your skin, “What do you want, baby?”

“You-your tongue. And your fingers... please.” You just manage to squeak out between shallow, shaky breaths, already losing yourself in the feeling of his gentle touch so close to where you need him most.

Joel plants a kiss on your mound through the thin, lacy fabric of your underwear, his dark chocolatey gaze lifting to watch your expression as you shudder under his touch.

Only, he doesn’t catch your gaze when when he looks up from between your legs, finding your eyes closed and chin pointed slightly towards the ceiling — and Joel won’t have that.

Leaving its perch on your thigh, one of Joel’s big hands lifts to grab your chin. Making no attempt to move your head, but just cupping your face lightly, rough fingers lightly pressing into your skin.

"I won't do anything until you look at me, darlin’. Wanna see your pretty eyes when you tell me what you want."

The stern tone of his raspy voice has your eyes shooting open immediately, thighs clenching around his broad shoulders where he sits between them, a whimper leaving you at his commanding tone.

lashes fluttering as you tilt your head to look down to where Joel rests his head on your thigh, a bashful smile curves up on your lips when you find his steely gaze boring into you expectantly.

Leaning your head down just a bit further to drop a sweet kiss to the hand that still gently grips your chin.

“Sorry, daddy.”

And only once he knows your eyes are on him does Joel ravish you. Long, thick fingers of one hand pushing your pretty little panties to the side and pushing knuckle deep into you cunt, the other hand still gripping your chin as you moan out above him.

“Good girl. Just keep your eyes on me.” Joel commands from those pretty lips of his just before they wrap around your clit.

anyway, I need to go lie down for like 3-5 business days bc my brain is going brrrrr 😵‍💫🫠 thank you so much for sending this my dear, so sorry again for letting this sit in my inbox forever haha 😭 I hope you enjoy and ilysm!! 🥰🧡💗🧡💗

[scenteddelusion5]

"Two households, both unalike in dignity, In our unsightly hell, where we lay our scene," PART 5 (FINISHED)

Vox x gn reader (Alastor's child)

Note: LAST PART!!! Are you ready?!

Word count: 4074

Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4 - Part 5

Y/n's eyes slowly opened. How long were they asleep? They slowly pushed themselves up. Familiar sheets covered them, it was theirs. Looking around they were on their room, only it looked to be a lot cleaner. All their dirty clothes had disappeared, their box stood newly organised in the bookcase and the dirty cup that usually stood on their nightstand was gone. In its stead stood a beautiful vase with their favourite flowers in it.

Their shoulder was patched up. It hadn't completely healed yet, it still hurt but not as much anymore. Y/n threw his legs out of bed, trying to stand up only to fall down again. They hadn't had any energy left, despite having slept for at least a few hours.

"Where's Vox?" Y/n whispered to themselves.

That's when it hit them, Vox had gotten hurt because of them. their adrenaline pumped up again, giving Y/n the strength to stand up again. They ran, or rather stumbled, out of the room.

"Vox!"

Alastor ran up from his eat when he heard noises coming from upstairs. His child was finally awake. He ran to the stairs and there they were.

"Careful, little fawn, you'll fall." Alastor held them up using his shadows.

"Vox! No, where's Vox?!" They tried to pull themselves away from the shadows. "I have to get to Vox."

"Your... 'boyfriend'... is fine." Alastor said with disgust. "He is coming by later in the afternoon. You should lay down again."

"You aren't going to hurt him?"

"As much as I dislike him, I now see that you two are truly in love." He held them by the arm and let them back to their room. "You've been asleep for two days, the angelic rope had drained a lot of your energy." He sat them down back on the bed. "That noisy picture box of yours had come by six times since he had awoken, even brought you flowers."

"He brought these." They mumbled, reaching for the flowers.

The Radio Demon looked at their child smiling at something as simple as a few flowers like they were the biggest treasure in the world.

"Little fawn, I'm sorry. I tried to protect you to the best of my ability but I almost lost you because of it." He pulled them into a hug. "Please forgive me."

Y/n hugged him back. "I forgive you."

"Now, what would you like to eat?" Alastor pulled back and patted their head. "You must be starving."

"Jambalaya sounds really good right now."

"Good old Jambalaya it is then." He stood up and was about to leave the room. "Oh, I almost forgot, he left you a gift. I put it on your desk." The door closed with a click and they were all alone again.

They stood up again and slowly made their way to the desk. A small unfamiliar, black box sat in the corner. Inside it sat a brand new VoxTech phone, a new phone case and a note:

I'm sorry love but after what happened I kept the tracker on. -Love Vox <3

Picking up the case, it had a cute drawing of a deer in the green woods on the back. Y/n turned on the phone, on it popped the same picture of Vox and them. He had transferred all their data and settings.

Y/n looked at their two contacts; Vox and Velvette. Their finger hovered over the calk button. Alastor said he would came by later anyway... But they really wanted to hear his voice, just to see if he is okay. They clicked.

It took Vox only two seconds to pick up. "Y/n? Are you alright?"

"Yes, I'm doing fine. I just woke up. How are you?"

"Now that I'm talking to you, better than ever doll." His voice deepened, trying to sound cooler. Y/n really loved this dork.

"Sir, the presentation is-" A squeaky voice could be heard through the call.

"Don't you see I'm on the phone." Vox dismissed him.

"If you're busy I can calk later."

"NO! Don't worry about it, I'm not busy, Vox said quickly, "you know what? I'm so not busy I will come over right away!"

"But sir-" The voice spoke again.

"Bye bea, I'll see you in a minute!"

Y/n could only imagine the panic on his worker's face when Vox sprinted out of that meeting. After speaking with him again, Y/n felt their energy recover even more and decided to head downstairs.

Alastor was working on his special Jambalaya in the kitchen. His little, deer tail swaying to the sound of jazz music coming from the radio. Hearing Y/n enter, he turned around.

"What are you doing out of bed?" He asked. "You should be resting more."

"I feel rested enough." Y/n stalked over to the stove. "It smells amazing."

"Of course it does, I made it. I also put in the 'secret ingredient'." He winked. "Even used your favourite."

A knock came from the front door.

"I'll get it!" They rushed to the front door. "Hey Vox!"

"Y/n!" He hugged his lover. "How are you healing up? Does it still hurt? Should I get tou some painkillers?"

Alastor rolled his eyes hearing the TV Demon at the door.

"No need, I'm doing fine."

The two walked back in through the hallway into the kitchen.

"More importantly, how is your wound?" They gently grabbed his arm to inspect the wound. "I'm sorry, I hurt you."

"You didn't do anything! I-I jumped in front of you! It's my fault." Vox slightly buffered as he was talking a mile a minute. "I'm just happy you're fine." He put on his adorable, dorky, little smile.

"Vox, I wasn't expecting you until 5 pm." Alastor's voice sounded irritated but his smile didn't falter.

"Well, Y/n called me. So I rushed over."

There definitely still was tension between the two, a lot of tension. But they weren't openly nor aggressively hostile towards each other. It was progress.

Alastor's smirk grew wider. "Then why don't you join us for lunch. I made Jambalaya." He put down the pot on the dining table.

Vox sat down next to Y/n, wrapping his arm around them. "Sure."

Vox regretted his decision as soon as Alastor pulled of the lid revealing the Jambalaya. A familiar smell reeked from it, there was demon meat inside it.

"You know what, I think I'll pass." Vox laughed nervously.

"I can't believe how rude your boyfriend is being Y/n. Not eating the food I so lovingly prepared." The Radio demon took a big scoop and put it on a plate. "At least take a bite."

"It's fine if you don't want it." Y/n pulled the plate away from him. "I'll finish it for you."

"What kind of man can't even finish his own plate?"

"Those are old-timey values, dad."

"Hmm." Alastor looked him up and down. "It's still disrespectful."

"Like we have ever had respect for each other, you old bastard," Vox said holding up his middle finger.

"See, that's not any way to talk to the father of your partner."

"Dad, stop it." Y/n scolded him. "You don't have to eat anything you don't want to."

Vox looked down to the Jambalaya and then back up to a smug looking Alastor. "I'll try it."

"Splendid!" Alastor grabbed two more plates and filled them up. "Bon appetite!"

Vox slowly used his fork to bring the Jambalaya to his mouth. He had eaten demon flesh before, this shouldn't be any different. Just bite through it.

The TV Demon swallowed as fast as possible. "Blur, that was... sure something."

"Aren't you going to finish your plate?" Alastor challenged him.

And so the lunch went on. Vox almost throwing up with every bite while Alastor was smirking at him every time.

"There, I finished it!" He yelled, victorious.

"Then would you like seconds?"

"Dad! Leave him alone. You've bullied him enough." Y/n was quite surprised by hoe civil the two still were but that didn't mean they had fully forgiven him. "Besides, you had hurt him pretty badly too during my 'rescue'. Don't you think he deserves an apology?" They knew they were pushing the Radio Demon's limits with that one and yet they still wanted to see if he actually would.

Alastor sighed, "Vox."

Was he actually going to?

"My sincerest apologies, I hadn't realized how weak you truly are and therefore used too much force."

"Oh fuck you."

"Now that that's out of the way, we have more important things to discuss." Alastor stood up and brought the dirty dishes to the sink. "You see, after my poor fawn had passed out and Vox decided to be dramatic, I captured the demon behind the attack. I still have him, Paris and the imp in my possession"

"Hmm, you know, I've always wondered what imp tastes like." Y/n cheekily suggested.

"As for Paris, I will have some fun with him and then hand him over to Rosie." Alastor had washed off the dishes and was putting them back in the cupboards. "He's her responsibility. The last Demon's fate is up to you, DEAR future son in law." The nickname was spat out like venom.

"So, who is the fucker that wanted them dead anyway?" Vox enquired.

"It seemed a certain colleague of yours had gotten jealous and decided to take my little fawn out."

"Val," Vox whispered. "I knew he was acting weird."

"How are you planning to deal with him?"

Vox looked at Y/n, their deer eyes staring back at him. He could have lost them forever, all because Valentino couldn't get over being dumped. He had to kill him. Not only to ensure Y/n's safety but also to prove himself to Alastor. To prove that nothing comes before them.

"Do you have angelic weapons here?"

Vox, Y/n and Alastor had wondered deep into the forest on the Radio Demon's territory. Nothing could be heard except for some hellbirds chirping.

"Doesn't this bring you back, little fawn?" Alastor lamented. "I still remember your first hit, we buried his leftovers next to that old tree. Haha, those were the days!"

"Yeah, I couldn't even finish a liver back then!" Y/n laughed.

As terrifying as their conversation was, it could not compare the what he was going to do. He knew Val had to go, for their sake, but he was still an old friend. One HE had to kill. He couldn't even discuss it with Velvette first!

Oh she was going to be so mad, with Valentino gone both their workloads would increase tenfold.

They stopped at a clearing. Vox held the gun in his sweaty hands. Alastor opened a pitch black portal. Out of it he pulled a tied up Val.

"Don't you know how shitty it is in there!" The overlord yelled. "Ah, Voxie baby, thanks for getting me out of there."

Vox held up the gun and pointed it straight at the man's head.

"Wowowow, what's all this about?" Valentino looked around seeing Alastor and Y/n glaring at him. "Are you seriously choosing them over me? You FUCKING need me! YOU NEED ME!!!" He started to approach Vox. "These two are going to get rid of you after me!"

"Goodbye Val." Vox pulled the trigger. An angelic bullet shot straight through the demon's head, killing him instantly. "So, what are we going to do with the body?"

"Don't worry, the animals will take care of it."

A month went by like a breeze. Vox had to find a new face for the V's 'film' department, in the meantime he had to take over as Velvette refused to take on more work.

"Fuck no!" She had yelled when he even brought up the possibility of taking over a little bit of paperwork.

So it all fell on him. This also meant he had less time to spend with Y/n, which they understood. And Alastor got to enjoy the chance to tell him how much of a terrible boyfriend he was for not spending enough time with them.

All and all, things went well.

As Vox's workload got smaller and smaller the couple started to spend more time together, which Alastor loathed. So the man took every chance he got to interrupt the two.

Going to the movies, suddenly there is a power outage. Having dinner at restaurant, Alastor invites himself along. Taking a walk through the forest, suddenly he NEEDS Y/n's help with something.

It became a sort if challenge between the two, who could keep Y/n's attention for the longest.

The couple were laying on the bed in their room Y/n reading a book while Vox was handling some more documents. Door wide upon as per Alastor's rules.

"I swear he is doing it on purpose!" Vox complained. "I mean, he straight up attacked me this time."

"He wants to see what you can do, train you." They turned over a page in their book. "It's his way of bonding. He already likes you a lot better, I swear!

He sighed, "if you say so, sweets. I sometimes just wished we could get along better, not just for my comfort but for yours." Vox set down his tablet on their nightstand and combed his fingers through their hair. "It must be exhausting to have us bicker all the time."

Before Y/n could answer, however, they got interrupted.

"My little fawn!" Alastor walked in. "I have to go to a meeting and I was wondering if you would come with me?"

"Oh." Y/n looked up at Vox. "I think I'm staying here. I haven't had the chance to hang out with Vox in quite some time."

"That's so unfortunate, you see." The overlord smirked. "It's quite the chance to build some steady connections for when it's time to climb up the ranks for you, but oh well!"

"If that's the case, why don't you take Vox with you?!"

"Pardon?"

"He is an overlord too, connections would be useful, right?" They looked the TV Demon in the eyes.

"Uhm well yes, bu-"

"Then this is your chance!" They jumped up from the bed and started pushing Alastor out of the room. "He'll be down in five."

For some strange reason or another, the Radio Demon didn't make a fuss about it. Just accepted that Vox would come with, strange... Very strange...

Alastor and Vox stood awkwardly next to each other right outside the front door.

"So, are we taking a car, or...?" Vox broke the silence.

"If we still lived in my time we would have just taken the trolly," the Radio Demon remarked, "But we aren't so get those legs moving. It's quite far."

The TV glared at the other walking away. "Where are we going, anyway?"

Alastor looked back at the man catching up to him. "Don't worry your ugly little head over it!"

"This 'ugly head' scored your child, motherfucker!" He retorted.

A shadowy tentacle shot out of Alastor's back. The appendage hit Vox right in the middle of his screen, almost cracking it.

"I didn't take you for a gambler," Vox said, staring at the buzzling casino the two were about to enter, "what would Y/n think of you?"

"I don't frequent establishments of this kind often but when I do, I don't plan on losing." Alastor made his way inside, the other following him. "This is your chance to show me what you're made of. Don't ruin it."

Vox followed the demon into the back where a familiar overlord was sitting at a poker table.

"Husker my old friend, I see you are at again!" He sat down at the table and as soon as he did, a few of the denizens that excused themselves. "How about a round? Even brought easy pickings."

"I'm not easy pickings!" Vox yelled whole sitting down, not willing to back of from this challenge.

"Vox, huh, didn't realise you became chummy with the Radio Demon." Husker looked him up and down. "Fine, you can join but remember, we're dealing in souls over here!"

As soon as Vox sat down, chips appeared before him. These chips, however, weren't your usual casino chips. No, these held a soul in them. He couldn't believe this was happening, gambling with souls was very risky and here Alastor, fucking Alastor, was willing to risk it against the overlord of gambling. Not only that, but the man had pulled him along too.

The cards were shuffled and everyone got their own deck. This was insane, losing even one game could mean losing his position as an overlord. Now that Vox was thinking about it, Alastor had planned to bring Y/n along for this.

He was willing to risk Y/n's power and soul for a stupid game! This didn't feel right, Alastor would never. Then maybe, just maybe, the Radio Demon had already secured the win before even starting the game.

Vox looked over at the man, and the face he saw confirmed it. The Radio Demon was smirking even wider than ever before. This was going to be Husk's last night as an overlord. For him this meant to protect his own souls at all costs and let Alastor handle the rest.

"Come on Husker, are you really going to back out now?" Alastor teased, "Maybe you'll win it all back in one last round!"

"I don't have more souls." Husker glared at the giant stack of chips in front of the other two.

"Well technically you do have one more... But I understand why you wouldn't gamble with it." The Radio Demon put on a fake disappointed face while still maintaining his signature smile. "I guess that's it for the gambling overlord."

The two other demons were about to stand up and leave before Husker spoke up, "Wait! One more round but keep in mind that I have only one souls to bet!"

"It's a deal then!" The Radio Demon immediately agreed. "I'll put in all my chips for your singular soul."

"I'm backing out." Vox took his chips and made them disappear. Knowing Alastor, the demon would've taken all his souls too this round if he didn't. Besides, he had even gained a few souls that night.

"Heads up, then?" Husker asked at which Alastor agreed.

It was a brutal sight. The horror in Husker's eyes after he realised he not only lost his position as an overlord but also lost his own soul, all in the same night.

"Well good friend, it's getting late and I have to prove to my little fawn I didn't kill their suiter!" Alastor made all his chips disappear. "Come on Vox, Y/n is waiting on us."

"Right..." Vox was still flabbergasted about what he witnessed that day.

Once outside, he gained the confidence to speak up. "What was that?"

"Just some dealings, shouldn't an overlord like you understand such a simple concept?" Alastor chided. "Or are you as incapable as I first guessed you were!"

"That's not what I meant! You were going to have Y/n gamble with souls?!" Vox stepped in front of him, blocking the way. "You know how risky that would be you lollipop looking FUCKER!!!"

"They would've been just fine," he shrugged, "besides, it's about time they gained more power. I can't always be there for them, especially when they go behind my back." He shot a glare at the other man.

"Then why were you fine with me coming?"

"Hmm, if they're going to be with you, I should make sure you can protect them."

The rest of the way back was silent. Vox mulling over the other's words.

Weeks went by and instead of fighting over Y/n's attention, Alastor started to pull Vox away from them for 'training sessions'. While Vox found them to be tortures, he couldn't deny they weren't useful.

It was Y/n's birthday, the house was decorated with banners and guests were coming over. Vox had already been there since morning, annoying their father. Rosie, Franklin, some other cannibals and even Velvette came over. Gifts stacked on the table, snacks were available next to the pile.

"Oh darling, it's good to see you." Rosie shook their hand. "And another happy birthday!"

"Thanks, Rosie!"

At some point Alastor pulled Vox away from the party into his study.

"I need to talk with you." The Radio Demon filled his cup with whatever was in the ceramic pitcher. "As you know I am quite the traditional man."

"I'm aware," Vox answered.

"Then I probably won't have to tell you this but I just want to make sure." He took a sip from his mug. "If I find out you two partook in any... Usual marital affairs before you two could wed, I will hunt you to the edges of hell and rip your soul apart." Alastor grew twice in size, his eyes turned into dials, and static and symbols appeared all around him. "G̸̟͉̍̃͒̐͝Ö̴͔̫̀T̸̻̹̆ ̶̺͉̻̫̝̯̈̉̅̏̑ ̸̠̞͌͋͛͑͛̉͝͝I̵̖̩̓̃̈͝Ṫ̷̨̧̥̺̤̗̳̹͒̐?!"

"Yes, sir!"

"Great!" In one second the Radio Demon was back to his usual self. "Now let's get back to the party, shall we?"

Guests came and went, until only Alastor and Vox were left.

"So, uhm, the night's almost over but I haven't given you my gift yet." Vox held a rectangle box in his nervous sweaty hands. "Here."

Y/n carefully pulled of the ribbon and the wrapping paper, revealing a box. It was a V-Reader.

"Thank you."

"I wasn't sure you would like it but it can hold of 5 million books, designed it myself!"

"It's perfect." Y/n kissed the screen right between his eyes where his nose would have been.

"Erhmehm," Alastor fake coughed while glaring at the other overlord, "You also haven't received my gift yet." He grabbed their hand, holding it tightly.

Before Y/n realised what he was about to do, pure power started running through their veins from their hand to the rest of their body.

"I got these souls recently and have no need for them. I figured you could use some more power."

"I see, thanks."

The rest of the night was spend with just the two lovebirds in their room, door open of course.

"Dad's been acting weird, don't you think?"

"He has been his some old annoying self as far as I've noticed." Vox ran his fingers through their hair. "Why do you think that?"

"He would've never given me souls if it wasn't for something important and instead of trying to pull me away, he has been 'training' you." Y/n laid their head on his chest, listening for his heartbeat. "He has also been very sentimental the last few days, looking back on childhood memories, cooking together, hunting together. It all feels off."

"Then we'll ask him about it tomorrow, I doubt he would want to worry you."

"If you say so."

They were never able to ask him, because when the two of them woke up without the father yelling at Vox to get out of their bed, the two knew there was something wrong. They looked around the house, Alastor, however, was nowhere to be found.

They went to Cannibal Town to ask around, but no one had seen him there either. Not even Rosie knew where he was. Y/n's worry grew and grew. It got so bad that Vox decided to use his camera's to look all over hell to look for a sign of the Radio Demon.

Nothing, absolute no sign of Alastor.

Months went by, still no sign. Y/n moved into Vox's apartment, for both safety and not to feel lonely in their old home where everything reminded them of their father.

Even after all this time, Y/n still held hope, however, after two years that hope dissolved too. Vox and them started taking over all of the Radio Demon's responsibility.

After a while the two of them even got engaged and Y/n had accepted the fact that their father likely would never come back.

Epilogue

Seven years went by and the love birds were extremely happy, until one day Vox was working in his office and one of his camera's that he had around the princes' new hotel picked up something.

"THAT FUCKER IS BACK!" Vox yelled, staring at the screen showing the Radio Demon casually hanging out at the Hazbin Hotel. "He didn't even tell Y/n. Oh, I'm going to make him suffer for their grieve. I'm going to make you wish you'd stayed gone!"

And that's the end. My next long series is with Zestial, part 1 already out. But if you have any one-shot request for me check out my pinned post with all the characters I write about!

Masterlist/request guidelines

Taglist: @hxzbinwrites

[narcissarina]

Darkened Desires

Prologue and Chapter 1: The sun || Chapter 2: The moon || Chapter 3: The moon || Chapter 4: The sun || Chapter 5: The sun || Chapter 6: The moon || Chapter 7: The moon || Chapter 8: The sun || Chapter 9: The sun

Pairings: Mafia!Scaramouche × Barista!Reader

Word count: 1,032

Tw: praise kink, degradation, kidnapping, tourture, dub/non-con, forced breeding, dismembering, gore, deaths, age-gap, corruption, use of force, trauma, use of drugs, stalking, mentions of human trafficking on the near chapters, slowburn.

Warning: This fanfiction may contain kidnapping, torture, dub/non-con, forced breeding, dismembering, age-gap, corruption, vigilante Scaramouche, use of force, trauma, use of drugs, stalking, and more. This fiction will continue grow darker as chapters goes by.

Your mental health matters.

CHAPTER 10:

THE OUTSIDER

He didn’t gave me a choice but to do this, I thought we were a team but I guess not. He doesn’t understand that we needed that girl, well—that was what the Tsaritsa said, and so I did what I have to do. It’s not a crime to follow someone’s order, was it?

I was pretty much delighted when she had fallen asleep, it was as easy as Scara said to hack cameras and manipulate them, so I did. Took her away from home and kept her in the basement, well—probably more of a torture room, I love to see his reaction when he marks to himself that the Tsaritsa isn’t playing games.

All he needed to do was deliver the goods and have a lovely conversation with the client, but no—he was too busy talking to his darling sunshine and saving children and women, not that it was a bad idea.

It was nice of him to use his position and power to save the poor who couldn’t protect themselves. But the Tsaritsa said that time is ticking, she doesn’t have all day now, does she?

Now here I am, stuck with his mess with his own client—not mine.

My head throbs as his client ramble to me, I could only maintain a friendly smile—showing not even a slight of irritation even though I want to put a bullet and slit his throat up.

“Yes, I understand your frustration.” I nod and folded my arms, leaning my back to the soft cushion of my seat “what about m—” I interrupt him, “No need to get concern about your… goods.” I let out a soft chuckle and rest my chin to my palm, “I’ll be sure to confiscate you and give you your goods.” I added and took a sip of my glass of red wine.

He opened his mouth but shut it again, “seems like a good deal, no? I’ll even add a discount for you.” I rest my arms wide from the back of my seat, “not only I’m doing something ‘good’ but also…” I mutter the last words, “benefitting the Tsaritsa some informations…”

“what was that?”

“It’s beneficial for the both of us.” I cover up with a lie and smiled, leaning forward and resting my elbow to my knees,

“What do you say, mister Xy?” I look at him in the eye, he’s hesitant but agreed anyway, “great!” I stood and clap my hands together and look at my men, “I’ll be sure to contact you,” I say as I turn to look at him, with his expression remains a hint of doubt.

“Report.” I mumble next to my men as he lean to whisper in my ear, I nodded as I listen to his words. “Very good,” I pat his shoulder and turn around and walk towards the exit, as if on cue—my men had followed me out. The car has been ready and I step inside, adjusting and making myself feel comfortable inside.

Crossed my legs and lean my head against the window, “Let’s go back to little miss sunshine.”

The driver nod and drove off.

As I entered in my own home, I hear voices from below—it must’ve been someone accompanying her with the door slightly open, I sigh and took off my coat and give it to my servant.

I walked down the stairs and saw one of my men arguing with the miss, I decided to eavesdrop before interrupting their fun.

“You can’t just push the remote whenever you please because you’re that hungry!” he argued, she just looks at him with her eyes squint, “why not?” she innocently asked, “because you’re eating every often, you literally asked for food three fucking times in a row!”

“because I’m hungry.”

“And we’re gonna run out of ingredients to feed to you! The fuck kind of stomach you have, woman!?”

I snicker, holding back my laugh as I let the scene play out.

“then y’all shouldn’t have left me with the remote then.” She frowns, “can’t do that. That’s against our boss’s order.” He clears his throat as he spoke, I heard him take a deep breath before continuing.

I heard a bell ring upstairs, I’m gonna burst but I can’t.

“Come on! What now?!”

“I want desserts.”

I couldn’t hold it in anymore, I burst out laughing—my arm on my stomach. I couldn’t believe this girl, it’s either this is the reason why Scara chose her or another but this is beyond hilarious.

“B-Boss!” he stammer and fixes himself in front of me, I dismiss it, trying to calm myself down. I breath in and out as I slowly got my cool back, I couldn’t hold it in anymore, I burst out laughing—my arm on my stomach. I couldn’t believe this girl, it’s either this is the reason why Scara chose her or another but this is beyond hilarious.

I look at him as I see his skin jump, “what are you waiting for? Get her desserts.”

“but sir.”

“No excuses, don’t want her get hungry now, do you? Would you like a demonstration when Scara’s little sunshine get starved?” the corner of my lips tug a small but sinister smile, “no sir.” He answered and left with his head looking at the ground.

I let myself see him out then turn to look down at her, my figure towering her down in her ground, “does this frighten you?” I asked, she shakes her head and nod a little, “only a bit.”

“Why?”

“there’s no warmth in the darkness.”

I suck my cheeks in and nodded, “but it also makes me feel safe too, sometimes.” She mumbled the word sometimes as she fidgets with her fingers.

“Will you let me go now?”

I chuckle and shakes my head, “not until your hubby give me something that I want.”

“what is it?”

“It’s classified, only belonged to his stepmother.”

Her eyes speaks curiosity and an itch to dig into it more, I smiled and shift my weight to my left, “don’t want you snooping around to his personal life now, curiosity does kill the cat.” I warned and turn around and leave her behind.

I can feel her eyes burn at the back of my neck.

It’ll be fun playing with her for a while…

Link:

Chapter 11: THE MOON

[apollons-arrow]

sorry it’s been like 3 months since i posted. but anyways here’s a piece i saw at a museum of Dionysos and a worshipper that actually makes me tear up. they are so intimate!!! look at the way they’re smiling at each other!!! please do not contact me this is all i’m thinking about for the next 3-5 business days!!!

[chiimeramanticore]

Part of the Band - Chapter 4 - Comedy Club

Chapter summary: The gang goes to a comedy club. Someone gets into a fight.

Chapter word count: 2,124

<- Chapter 3 - Chapter 5 ->

Read it on AO3!

Beach Bear plops down on the couch with a sigh. "Good work, guys," he says. "Why don't we call it a day?"

"We just started," Queenie complains. "You're the same slacker I've always known."

"Don't get on my case," Beach Bear mutters, leaning back and closing his eyes.

"I think we should discuss the band a little more," Billy Bob says. "Let's see, we got you and me doing guitars, Queenie can sing, and Dook is on drums... What are we missing?"

"Oh! Oh! Oh! I know!" Looney Bird exclaims, feathers ruffling excitedly. "Keys, we need keys!"

"Keys! Great idea, Looney Bird," Billy Bob replies. He turns to the group. "Do any of us know anyone who can play piano?"

"No," Dook says.

"Nope," Queenie says.

"Nuh-uh," Beach Bear says.

Billy Bob looks at Mitzi.

"...What?" She says.

"Well, we're gonna have to find someone who can play piano," Billy Bob says. "Beach Bear, how'd you recruit Dook into the band anyway?"

"I told you, I–"

"We met at a bar," Dook says. "He, uh, struck up a really good conversation with me. And the idea of the band came up."

"Hmm..." Billy Bob thinks for a moment. "Well, I suppose it would be good to be in a social setting. We can meet more people that way. And it's been a little bit since we all did something together, hasn't it? Let's go out somewhere!"

"Yeah," Beach Bear says, sitting up. "We'll celebrate Dook joining us... but it'll also be, like, a business trip."

"You guys been to that new comedy club yet?" Queenie suggests. "We could go there."

"That sounds great," Billy Bob says, "but, uh, what about Mitzi?"

"What about her?" Queenie says. "We'll drive past my place on the way there. I'll just drop her off. She can handle herself. Right, squirt?"

"Yeah..." Mitzi says, burying her snout in one of the pillows on the couch.

"She'll be fine," Queenie says. "Let's go."

·–—–·

The comedy club is dim and warmly lit. Upon entering, the group are greeted by a sizeable seating area, with a bar to the left and the stage to the right. They end up at a table closer to the back, despite the place not being very crowded. The table is elevated, with chairs to match, and has just enough seats to fit everyone. Everyone grabs a chair quickly, save for Dook, who hesitates– and soon the only chair left is sat between Queenie and Looney Bird. He sits down.

Looney has already engrossed himself in conversation with Billy Bob, his back turned to Dook. Queenie is staring idly off toward the stage. He should make conversation.

"So, uh, babysitting, huh?" Dook starts.

"Ugh, yes," Queenie responds, not making eye contact.

"How'd you get into that business?"

"Does it matter? I don't really feel like talking about Mitzi right now."

"...Why not?" Dook asks.

"Because we're at an adult place and I don't want to think about little kids anymore." She squeezes her eyes shut, resting her head against a hand.

Dook looks down at the table for a second. "Who is Mitzi to you, anyway?"

"Wh– She's my little sister, alright?" Queenie says, looking at him now. "Is that what you want to hear? I'm babysitting my damn little sister every day."

"Your parents can't–?"

"Hey!" Beach Bear says, laughing nervously, "Why don't we go get some drinks, huh? Come on Dook, let's head to the bar."

"Why'd you do that?" Dook asks as they approach the bar.

"Listen, Dook," Beach Bear says, "Mini's kinda going through some stuff right now. The least we can do is not bother her about it."

"Well, what is she going through?"

"I don't know," he says, a touch bothered. "And it doesn't matter. Just, lay off, okay?"

"Okay." He turns to the menu. "What are you getting?"

"You like cocktails?" Beach asks.

"Sure," Dook replies.

"Alright," he says, signaling for the bartender. "Two margaritas, please."

Behind them, someone begins playing a guitar on stage. Beach Bear turns to look at them. "Man, I thought this was a comedy club," he says. "Maybe they're one of those musical comedy acts."

Dook doesn't fully turn around, but rather watches Beach Bear. Not focused on him doing anything specific, just… him in general. His face, his fur, his eyes. His eyes are a striking blue, lighter than any he's ever seen. Almost electric. He leans against the counter of the bar with one arm, his torso bent casually backwards. He looks cool, but he always looks cool. How does he do it? Does it just come to him naturally… or has he been trained to do it? Dook shifts to lean similarly against the bar, on his side rather than his back.

The bartender comes back with their drinks. "That's four bucks," she says.

"Yeah," Beach Bear fishes into his wallet and hands her a five dollar bill. Dook doesn't protest his paying for him this time.

"Thanks," he says, taking a sip. It's sweet and sour at the same time.

"Heh, anytime," Beach replies, taking a sip himself. "You drink often? Or is it just a coincidence we keep meeting in bars?"

"A little of both," Dook says, smiling bashfully. "We wouldn't meet so much if you didn't keep following me around, you know."

"Maybe I like to follow you around. Maybe you're interesting."

"Or maybe you're a predator stalking his prey."

Beach Bear fake gasps, placing a hand to his heart. "Really, Dook. You think that low of me?" His grin betrays his otherwise convincing tone of voice. Dook smiles.

"You still haven't proven you're not a serial killer," he says, turning back to his drink.

"Mm." Beach Bear takes another sip of his drink. "I'll figure out a way to prove it to you," he says. "One of these days."

"You guys gonna join us again, or what?" A voice shouts from their table. It's Looney Bird.

"Uh– Yeah, of course!" Beach Bear calls back. He chuckles, glancing toward Dook. "Let's go."

·–—–·

The group spends the next couple of hours at the club, cheering and jeering the rotation of performers, drinking, and enjoying each other's company. By the time they leave, it's well into the evening.

The group exits the building, a bit rowdy, laughing and talking with each other. Dook lags behind slightly, not particularly interested in the conversation, when he hears another voice. He can't make out what they're saying, but it sounds aggressive.

"Guys," he says, reaching out and touching two of them to get them to stop. "Guys, I thought I just heard a fight starting."

"None of my business," Queenie says.

"Well, I wanna go see what's up," Dook says. "You don't have to come with me, but I'm going." He doesn't wait for anyone else's approval, and walks toward the other side of the building.

There, he finds an alley, with a door leading back into the building. In the doorway is a fox, and standing just in the alley is a wolf.

"I'm not telling you this again," the fox says. "We only let contracted performers play here."

"But I auditioned-!" The wolf complains.

"Yeah, and you didn't make the cut," the fox says. "Cut your damn losses and get the hell out of here."

"Th- this is unfair," the wolf protests. "It's unjust! It's a crime, I'd say!"

"Trespassing is a crime," the fox says, "and if you don't get your sorry behind out of here, I'm calling the cops on you! You are ruining the experience of the patrons!"

"You don't know what you're missing out on!" The wolf snaps. "This is the greatest act of the twentieth century!"

"Get lost, kid," the fox says, going back inside and closing the door.

"It's only a matter of time until I'm world famous, you know!" The wolf continues. "You'll be sorry you didn't have me when you had the chance, because when I'm famous I am never coming back here! Never! In fact, I'll even put in a bad word about you! I'll get this place shut down! Then you'll be sorry! You'll be… You'll…" He trails off, seeming to realize he's been thoroughly rejected.

"Oh God, it's just some loser," Queenie says from behind Dook. It seems the whole group followed him after all. "I thought you said they were fighting."

"It sounded like a fight," Dook says. "I'm gonna go talk to him."

"What? No," Queenie starts, but he's already approaching him.

"You okay?" Dook calls.

"Huh?" The wolf straightens, regaining his composure. "Of course, I'm fine! What would… make you think otherwise?"

"I heard you and that guy getting into it," he says. "Greatest act of the twentieth century, huh?"

"Naturally," the wolf says. He shifts to face Dook a little more, and only then does he notice the yellow puppet sitting on his hand. "Little Earl and I are a traveling comedy act, the two of us."

"Yeah, traveling 'cause he can't find us a place to stay at," the puppet says, in a much different voice from the wolf's.

"So you're a ventriloquism act," Dook says.

"Uh, sure," the wolf says.

"Well, you're great at it," Beach Bear says, having entered the alley as well. "I didn't see your lips move at all!"

"Well, I'm real glad you recognize our natural talent," the wolf says. "But that's not getting me any more on stage than I was before."

Dook looks over to Beach Bear. Beach shoots him back a similar look.

"We're actually, uh, trying to start this band–"

"No," Queenie says. "Absolutely not."

"Why not?" Billy Bob replies.

"Because!" Queenie huffs. "We need a pianist, not some second-rate sideshow!"

"Second-rate?!" The wolf exclaims.

"Yeah, and I'd say it again!" Queenie says. "This comedy club sucks, and if you couldn't get into even that, how could we believe you're even half as good to join us?"

"We're not that exclusive, Mini," Beach Bear says.

"No!" She turns to him. "Don't give me that, because that's exactly what made the Wolf Pack fail! You were too lax and let whoever the hell you wanted in, you didn't set any rules, and then you acted like the victim when it didn't work out!"

"I did not!" Beach Bear snaps.

"Yes, you did," Queenie adds. "That group was nothing but mistake after mistake."

"Maybe my only mistake was inviting you," Beach Bear says.

Queenie says nothing. The alley is silent.

"I– Mini, I didn't mean–"

"Mean what? Mean to say it? Because I know you meant what you said."

"Mini–"

"Shut up," she says. She doesn't shout, but the anger in her voice is clear. "Do whatever the hell you want. I'm going home."

She turns, walking out of the alley and into the night.

The group stands awkwardly in the alley as she leaves, unsure how to continue.

"...Well," the wolf says. "I'm not one to force my way into such a tight-knit group. But if you ever decide you need a, 'sideshow' act, here's my card." He pulls a business card out of his pocket and hands it to Dook.

"Rolfe DeWolfe," he says, reading it.

"The one and only," he replies, grinning.

Suddenly, the side door to the building opens, and the fox returns.

"Hey, what are you all doing out here?" He snaps. "This isn't some public hangout joint! Scram, all of you!" The group quickly obliges, all of them leaving the alley and scattering toward their respective homes.

"...Beach Bear," Dook says.

"Yeah?" Beach Bear replies.

"I'm real sorry," he says, staring down at the sidewalk as they walk. Beach Bear sighs.

"Don't be," he says. "You didn't do anything wrong."

"Well, you didn't either…"

"I dunno," he says. "I pissed Mini off. I'm a little drunk, I guess. I guess we all were."

"She's got a short fuse," Dook mutters.

"Yeah," Beach Bear says. "I dunno. She's always been like that."

"She doesn't sound very pleasant…"

"She's… not a bad person," he says. "You just need to get to know her. And how to interact with her."

They fall silent, walking down the street together. The streets are barren and quiet, the only noise coming from the ocean just a few blocks away.

"...What did you think of that Rolfe guy?" Beach Bear asks.

"Huh? Oh, I dunno," Dook says. "He's eccentric."

"Could be a good performer," Beach says.

"Sure, but… Queenie was right, wasn't she? We need to assemble the rest of the band before we start looking for side acts."

"Hey, you never know. That puppet could be a great singer."

Dook laughs. In his pocket, he touches the business card again. Maybe… Maybe not right now, but maybe.

[marina41trench]

Izumi Iori - PTT Xmas RabbitChat 4/5: Secret Trip

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5

Tsumugi: Thank you for your hard work.

Iori-san, thank you for waking me up earlier!

Tsumugi: I can’t believe I fell asleep on the desk at the office…

You really, really saved me…! ><

Tsumugi:

Iori: You were plopped on the desk while holding a pen and notebook, I wondered what was wrong.

Iori: Did you make it to the job site?

Tsumugi: Thanks to your efforts, the filming ended without a hitch!

Iori: That’s good.

I’m glad I went to the office by chance, so please look after yourself.

Tsumugi: Yes… I’ll keep that in mind…!

Tsumugi:

Tsumugi: Also, um… There’s something I want to ask…

Iori: What is it?

Tsumugi: Did I… sleep talk…?

Iori: Ah, yes it was truly incredible.

Tsumugi: Eh!

Tsumugi: It was incredible?!

Iori: I was very surprised.

Tsumugi: Aaaaah please forget it ><

Tsumugi:

Tsumugi:

Iori: I’m kidding. You were sleeping quietly.

Tsumugi: R-really?

Iori: Yes.

Tsumugi: Aah, I’m glad…

Tsumugi:

Iori: But your mouth was open.

Tsumugi: Eeeh!

Tsumugi:

Iori: It was open a bit so please don’t think about it too much.

Tsumugi: Ugh, this is really embarrassing… ><

Iori: Anyway, you’ll get colds if you doze off in the office.

Tsumugi: I agree… I will sleep properly at home.

Iori: Please do.

It’s our busy season, and it’ll be troubling if you collapse.

Tsumugi: Thank you for your consideration…!

Tsumugi:

Tsumugi: You’re going to go out today, right?

Iori: Yes. I went as far as Akihabara(1) to buy Christmas presents.

Tsumugi: It’s for exchanging gifts during the party!

Is your exchange partner Nagi-san?

Iori: You're correct. It was decided by ladder lottery. (2)

Tsumugi:

Tsumugi: I thought of it when you said you went to Akihabara! (laugh)

Iori: It was a Kokona limited merchandise that you can only buy onsite.

Iori: He was emitting a bad aura for the past few days because he had to go to work on the release day.

Tsumugi: I see… That’s why you kept asking me for Nagi-san’s schedule.

Tsumugi:

Iori: I’m glad I bought it successfully.

CHOICE

1. Was the queue really long?

Iori: I went there after researching about it, but it wasn’t long.

I realized Kokona’s popularity due to the competition in distribution of numbered tickets.

2. Did you buy anything else?

Iori: I came across a King Pudding ornament and bought it.

Yotsuba-san was happy and decorated it on the Christmas tree, so please give it a look once you come over.

3. What kind of merch did you buy?

Iori: It was a chibi figure(3) wearing a Santa Claus costume.

I finally understood Rokuya-san’s boast, “Kokona’s cheerful smile is cute.”

Tsumugi: It’s no mistake that Nagi-san will be very happy!

Iori: I look forward to his reaction on the appointed day.

Tsumugi:

Tsumugi: Huh?

Tsumugi: That reminds me, a moment ago Riku-san told me both of you will go out. Are you two going shopping?

Iori: Eh.

Iori: Ah, I’m going to meet him later. Since I’m pretty near.

Tsumugi: I see!

He told me the two of you ate lunch together. I thought he asked you to spend the day off together.

Iori: It just happened that we haven’t eaten lunch yet so we had to go out.

Tsumugi:

Iori: Did Nanase-san tell you anything else?

Tsumugi: He asked me about the President and Banri-san’s recent happenings.

Tsumugi: Also, he told me that Tamaki-san seemed troubled on what present he could give to a girl in the facility and seek his advice.

Iori: Huh.

Iori: I see…

Iori: He certainly mentioned something of that sort before.

Iori: I’m sorry, I remembered an errand.

I’ll contact you later.

Tsumugi: Y-Yes!

Tsumugi:

-

TL notes:

1 - Akihabara is a district in central Tokyo famous for its otaku culture. The market is focused on anime, manga, and video games. This is where Tokyo Big Sight (where ComiKet, Comic Market, is held) is located.

2 - Ladder lottery. Lottery in which participants trace a line across a lattice pattern to determine the winner (jisho.org)

3 - The Japanese dialogue is literally "distortion figure." The "distortion" word is borrowed from the French word "déformer." These figures are typically small in size, hence the use of "chibi"... which means small in Japanese.

[ill-be-istj-if-no-one-else-is]

Hi Em, I was wondering if you can help me figure out my mbti please. First of all I want to say I'm glad you're still around here bc I left for a couple of years and now can barely find active typology blogs. A few years ago I was very chaotic and unhealthy and you told me to come back to typology when I had more life experiences and my brain was fully developed so now that i'm 25 years old I'm back. I think i'm an NFP but i'd like you to confirm that or suggest another type please. (1/7)

One of my biggest struggles during my adult years has been career wise. Right now I'm a new grad nurse and i chose this career because it was supposed to give stability plus i was told it was one of those careers that were going to keep growing in demand. But it burned me out too much and i hated every second of it. I only stayed in it because it aligned with my values of helping people for a living. Now i'm thinking of going into debt to study a second career that is not so stable but i'm passionate about (psychology) bc i have something to fall back on financially anyways. I have other options like going into business, law, linguistics, and i can't make up my mind. All the feedback i've gotten from others is that i'm not much of a practical person. I thought i was just having some sort of midlife crisis but apparently is not normal. I think this suggests lower Te? (2/7)

Another thing that to me suggests low te is during my college years I struggled a lot with discipline and organization. It took me a lot of effort to take up my gpa, had to follow a lot of studyblr tips lol and strict rules to achieve that. I think I have Fi because my values are very important to me, to the point that I disrupt the environment, I'm the talk about abortion in family dinners ruinning the mood kind of person. And although I love people I struggle with being inauthentic and pretending to like someone when I don't (3/7)

I'm very much of a textbook introvert, shy and get drained when spending a whole day with a group of people and need too much alone time. But also in relationships i've struggled with being codependent and it sounds contradictory but i can't bear to be without them more than a week, I enjoy speaking out about my ideas and even in my "alone time" I contact internet friends to talk about the things that interest me (4/7)

The function that I struggle relating to is Ne due to lack of creativity and brainstorming abilities. I know Ne is more than that but I think I use it more in an unhealthy way? Like daydreaming to escape from my problems, being unable to stick to only one life path like the career example I gave above, feeling stressed after too many years of routine and wanting to leave everything behind. Oh but when my boss asks me to come up with creative ways to talk about STDS with my patients, i can't really come up with anything. I enjoy abstract conversations (about philosophy and spirituality / esoteric stuff mostly) and get bored in normal day to day conversations with my peers. But in my job i prefer something that is practical and doesn't require much brainstorming (5/7)

I think I have lower Si because I struggle a lot with letting go of the past ways of doing things, very catastrophic thinking of "I tried this before and it didn't work so it's not going to work now". Also trouble forgetting people, way more than normal. I like routines and I get stressed when my environment changes too much. But i'm not exactly a structured person, I'm up to last minute plans (6/7)

Finally I don't think I have Se just because I'm very disconnected from my environment in a extreme way, i'm the type of person that falls a lot due to not noticing obstacles in the way, not noticing when the shower is steaming hot until many minutes later when my skin is burning, etc. And Ni thinking is very linear for me, I feel like I very much have a monkey brain and can't stick to only one idea. Can you please help me? I hope this was not too long thank you! (7/7)

----

So I must admit, this is still pretty chaotic and it feels like it focuses largely on weaknesses, rather than strengths, which still makes you difficult to type. While I am (still) not a mental health professional, my first thought is whether you've ever been tested for ADHD or similar just because you talk about wanting a stable, practical, uncreative job and enjoying routines, but also being forgetful, unaware of your surroundings, and not being pragmatic as a person. While it's entirely reasonable for a high Ne user to want stability in what they do, healthy high Ne would likely gravitate towards a stable job with some degree of brainstorming involved. Jobs like nursing, in fact, are often good for perceivers because it involves a lot of variety and spontaneity while still being a dependable career - though naturally not all perceivers would be happy as nurses.

I do think feeling seems reasonable, as does high Fi, but I am actually stuck on Se vs. Ne since either way it would be unhealthy. It almost sounds a little like an Fi-Ni loop to me - your feelings informing your idea of what your life should be without strong external input, an aimless desire for spontaneity but difficulty engaging with it mentally. But I would also at least take a hard look at ADHD, depending on how intensely your life is impacted.

[olliebee66]

I swear I'll work on my longer fics soon, but I keep getting smaller ideas like...

Single Dad!Graves who's taking his son to school, listening to the 5 year old go on about how he gets to play with Lego's and finish the drawing he's been doing for him to take to work and put on his desk to show everyone.

Single Dad!Graves who walks his son into the school and chuckles as his son runs off and hugs another boy, the boys parent smiling and ruffling his hair as well as their own kids hair before his son runs back over to him telling him that he'll see him later and he loves him very much before the two run off.

Single Dad!Graves who walks into the school later that afternoon, seeing his son comforting his friend who's in tears. He walks over and squats down, taking his shades off to ask what's wrong.

"His mama is late and his glasses got broken." his son says while hugging the other boy.

"Well, why don't we just stick around till she gets here." Single Dad!Graves suggests with a kind smile while he gets up and takes both the kids outside to sit on the bench there while they wait.

Single Dad!Graves who's on his phone when he hears frantic steps about a half hour later while the two kids are sat on the ground talking.

"Oh my goodness, I'm so sorry I'm late." a voice comes. He looks up and sees the person from before. "I hope I didn't keep you from getting out of here too long, work was awfully busy for some reason."

"Not a problem, ma'am." Single Dad!Graves chuckles, standing and smiling.

"Ah actually, it's not ma'am but anyways, thank you again."

Single Dad!Graves who's speechless, just nodding and watching them pick up their son and his backpack, the two waving goodbye before heading off to the parking lot.

"Why does he say mama if..." Single Dad!Graves murmurs aloud as he grabs his sons bag and walks with him to the car.

"It's cuz.. erm... I dunno, you should ask though!" his son says excitedly.

The next day, Single Dad!Graves drops off his son and sees his son's friend being dropped off, deciding to take the opportunity to talk to his "mama" about the other day.

"Hey so I was just wonderin', and please feel free to slap me if this is too personal, but your son calls you mama." he says, hands tucked in his pockets.

The giggle catches him by surprise. "Well, I was mama before but never stopped him. I'm sorry if that's confusing." he says, fishing a pen from his pocket and a piece of paper from his backpack, writing something down before handing it to Single Dad!Graves. "I've gotta get going but I'll see you at pick up."

Single Dad!Graves who's less confused as he takes the paper, watching him head to his car before looking at it and smiling as he sees the name and number with 3 x's, immediately pulling his phone out and adding the contact to his phone before shooting a text before leaving.

[stormyoceans]

top 10 most romantic vice versa moments? :)

SFJKSGFKGSKDGJSG SHORT ANSWER WOULD BE ALL OF THEM THEY LITERALLY INVENTED ROMANCE!!!!!! but apparently i like to hurt myself and aim to lose whatever sanity i have left so HERE WE GO I GUESS

1. the kitchen scene in episode 12. most of the time romance isn't actually in the grand public gestures but in the small ones we share every single day in the privacy of our homes and this scene is a perfect example of it like THE BACK HUG. THE CHEEK KISSES EXCHANGE. "WHATEVER COMES FROM YOU IS SO GOOD". PUEN TIGHTENING HIS HOLD AROUND TALAY AND TALAY'S HAND REACHING FOR PUEN'S OWN INSTINCTIVELY. "THANK YOU FOR COMING BACK AND SEARCHING FOR ME. AND THANK YOU FOR TAKING AWAY MY FEAR OF TOMORROW". PUEN'S HANDS ON TALAY'S WAIST. TALAY CUPPING PUEN'S FACE. "I THANK YOU TOO FOR BEING BORN SO THAT I COULD LOVE YOU". THE QUICK KISS AT THE END THAT'S JUST SO CASUAL AND INTIMATE AND SOFT. i've literally never seen two people be more domestic in love and enamored with each other in my entire life im sorry but this is truly peak romance to me!!!!!!

2. the reunion scene in episode 11. romantic scene moment sequence of events of all time OF ALL TIME truly changed the trajectory of my life my outlook my values the very foundations of my personhood i genuinely can't have more than surface level thoughts about this scene or else i'll go insane fr. LOVERS TRASCENDING SPACETIME AND FINDING EACH OTHER AGAIN IN THE SAME PLACE ONE OF THEM FIRST FELL IN LOVE WITH THE OTHER BUT IN A DIFFERENT UNIVERSE IN A DIFFERE BODY!!!!!! “TALAY” BEING THE FIRST WORD OUT OF PUEN’S MOUTH!!!! TALAY BEING SO OVERWHELMED HE CAN’T SAY ANYTHING AT FIRST!!!! “AI’DANG”!!!! THE BONE CRUSHING HUG!!!! "YOU MUST BE VERY TIRED. FROM NOW ON THINGS WILL BE OKAY"!!!! THE WIFE TEASING BECAUSE THAT'S EXACTLY WHO THEY ARE BICKERING BANTERING NERDS ABSOLUTELY SMITTEN FOR EACH OTHER!!!! THE HEARTACHE THE LONGING THE REALIZATION THE RELIEF THE COMFORT THE TENDERNESS THE UNDERSTANDING THE JOY THE LOVE!!!!!! losing my mind my marbles my capacity for rational thought and my grasp on reality

3. the hat scene in episode 9. doctor jimmy fucking pay my therapy bills and answer for your crimes in a court of law i watched this scene 9373828 times but also i can't look directly at it because i'll implode instantaneously. he really was out there that day making the most choices looking awestruck to the point of reverence and giving so much adoration tenderness wonder devotion LOVE!!!!! AND IF PUEN'S REALIZATION OF WHO TALAY IS WASN'T ALREADY THE MOST DERANGED EMOTIONALLY CHARGED INSANE SHIT EVER PUT TO FILM THEY ALSO GAVE US ANOTHER CONFESSION!!!!! "NO MATTER WHAT WILL HAPPEN, ALL I WANT IS FOR US TO REUNITE"!!!!! "I THINK I AM FALLING FOR YOU"!!!!! "CAN'T YOU TELL? IM FALLING FOR YOU TOO"!!!!! LIKE NOT ALL OF THIS ON TOP OF THE SOULMATISM THING PLEASE IM ALREADY ON THE FLOOR WAILING STOPPPPP KICKING ME WHEN IM DOWN

4. the post reunion scene in episode 11. so you get the reunion scene and are now agonizing on the floor partaking in fits of female hysteria trying to get a hold on yourself but hey, you think, at least that's the most romance they're gonna give in an episode, right? you're safe.... right???? FOOL!!!!!! YOU'RE NEVER SAFE IN THIS SHOW!!!!!! and what's more devastatingly romantic than puentalay just being puen and talay and talking about their feelings like THE RETURN OF "DO YOU KNOW HOW LONG THOSE 43.200 MINUTES I WAITED FOR YOU FELT LIKE"????? "IT WAS NO DIFFERENT FOR ME. BECAUSE FOR ME IT WAS 2.592.000 SECONDS I WAITED FOR YOU"????? "IM SO HAPPY"????? PUEN FIXING TALAY'S HAIR????? THE FOREHEAD KISS????? "DOES IT STILL FEEL LIKE A DREAM? OR DO YOU WANT ME TO DO MORE"????? THE HAND HOLDING????? "PROMISE ME YOU WON'T LEAVE ME AGAIN"????? "I WON'T LEAVE YOU AGAIN. I PROMISE"????? THE KISS????? anyway i'll be clinically dead for up to three business days do not contact me im becoming one with the soil

5. the greyllery confession in episode 8. look i know im biased but if you don't think this is one of the most romantic confession scenes in the history of television you're just lying to yourself. THE FACT THAT IT HAPPENS WHEN THE LIGHTS ARE OUT TO EMPHASIZE THAT THEIR FEELINGS AREN'T ABOUT THE BODIES THEY INHABIT BUT ABOUT WHO THEY ARE????? TALAY CUPPING PUEN'S FACE AS IF HE'S HOLDING THE MOST PRECIOUS THING IN THE WORLD IN HIS HANDS????? "I HAVEN'T EVEN SEEN YOUR REAL FACE YET I LIKE YOU"????? PUEN BEING SO OVERWHELMED WITH EMOTIONS HE NEEDS TO GRAB TALAY'S WRIST TO GROUND HIMSELF????? TALAY REPEATING "I LIKE YOU" 4 TIMES????? "I LIKE YOU TOO. I LIKE EVERYTHING ABOUT YOU"????? THE KISS????? THE TEAR FALLING DOWN PUEN'S CHEEK?????? i need to be institutionalized rn

6. the hourglass scene in episode 12. i guess puen declaring his feelings for talay to the world would be the easiest choice here, but it's in the quiet moments just between the two of them where i always feel my heart swelling and overflowing with emotions. AND WHAT A MOMENT THIS ONE IS!!!!!! "i didn't need to look at it (the moon) and imagine your face anymore"!!!!!! "i don't want to leave you"!!!!!! THE HOURGLASS WITH THE SAND THAT DOESN'T FALL!!!!!! "I DON'T WANT TIME TO GO BY WITHOUT YOU FROM NOW ON"!!!!!! TALAY HUGGING PUEN FIRST!!!!!! PUEN STROKING THE BACK OF TALAY'S HEAD!!!!!! "FROM THIS MOMENT ON IT'S YOU AND ME. TALAY AND PUEN"!!!!!! MORE HUGGING AND HEAD STROKING!!!!!! CITY PLAYING IN THE BACKGROUND!!!!!! friends im not gonna lie. im on the verge

7. nivea bathtub scene my beloved in episode 3. im physically incapable of watching this scene without giggling twirling my hair kicking my feet pausing and screaming into a pillow. THE WAY TALAY LOOKS AT PUEN JUST RELAXING IN THE BATHTUB WITH HIS EYES CLOSED AND DECIDES TO CLEAN HIS FACE AND DOES THAT SO GENTLY AND INTENTLY????? THE WAY PUEN BRUSHES THE COTTON PAD ON TALAY'S CHEST AND SAYS "IF THIS CAN BE USED TO WIPE AWAY DUST, I SHOULD USE IT WITH YOUR HEART. I THINK YOUR HEART HASN'T BEEN USED IN A LONG TIME"????? and i always praise jimmy for his insane ability of expressing so many emotions through his eyes alone but sea is honestly just as good THE WAY TALAY'S EYES LOOK SO BIG AND DEEP AND INNOCENT AND VULNERABLE IN THIS SCENE AND HE CAN'T HOLD PUEN'S GAZE FOR TOO LONG????? the tension the yearning the electricity THE ROMANCE

8. the first bed scene in episode 6. talay admitting out loud everything he missed about puen while puen is asleep!!!! just because he feels like saying it!!!! and all of those things being intrinsically PUEN!!!!! "I MISSED YOUR ANNOYANCE, YOUR SHYNESS, YOUR NICE SINGING VOICE, YOUR CARE, AND LASTLY JUST YOU"!!!!!! HE BASICALLY CONFESSED RIGHT THEN AND THERE AND DIDN'T EVEN REALIZE IT!!!!! AND THEN PUEN WAKES UP AND SAYS ONE OF THE MOST RIDICULOUS FLIRTY LINES I'VE EVER HEARD AND I RESENT THE FACT THAT I LIKE IT SO MUCH. thank god talay didn't get it but also i wish he did because "i like the sound of the sea" LIKE PUEN REALLY SAID HE LIKES THE SOUND OF TALAY AND SOMEHOW THAT MAKES /ME/ BLUSH????? and then they decided to make things even more disgustingly romantic by having PUEN GIVING TALAY AN EAR MASSAGE TO HELP HIM FALL ASLEEP????? is my mental health a joke to these people

9. the missing you scene in episode 6. TALAY LITERALLY POWER WALKED TO TUN'S PARENTS' HOUSE JUST SO HE COULD SERENADE PUEN AND TELL HIM HE MISSED HIM AFTER NINE DAYS OF NOT SEEING EACH OTHER. and that's pretty romantic as it is, right??? you'd really think that would be more than enough to get the point across, but since no one in this show seems to be satisfied if they don't make any scene as deranged as possible, we have TALAY LOOKING STRAIGHT INTO PUEN'S EYES WHILE SINGING "OH DEAR LOVE, I LOVE YOU". WE HAVE THE OG "DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW LONG 12.960 MINUTES I WAITED FOR YOU FELT LIKE?" "I KNOW. BECAUSE FOR ME IT WAS 777.600 SECONDS THAT I SPENT MISSING YOU LIKE CRAZY TOO". WE HAVE THEIR FIRST REAL HUG. honestly everyone involved in this show should be in JAIL

10. the helmet scene in episode 3. there are romantic puentalay moments that actually make me tear up from the sheer immensity of their feelings for each other and then there are romantic puentalay moments THAT HAVE ME GAGGING ON THE SIDE BECAUSE PEOPLE IN LOVE STINKS!!!!!! this scene definitely belongs to the latter group like PUEN GLUED TALAY'S HELMET SO WHEN TALAY FINALLY GOT IT OFF HE COULD READ THE WORDS WRITTEN ON THE BACK!!!!!! TALAY LITERALLY HAD THE SAME THOUGHT AND WROTE ON THE BACK OF PUEN'S HELMET TOO!!!!!! "THE ONE WEARING THIS IS CUTE" AND "YOU'RE SO GREAT"!!!!!!! and even before we got to that they were just standing there saying stuff like "im so lucky to have you"!!!!!! "im also glad i have you"!!!!!! "i'll live tun's life to the fullest. to the best. with you"!!!!!! THE PINKY PROMISE!!!!!! I HATE THEM ACTUALLY THEY'RE INSUFFERABLE

[khodorkovskaya]

21.02.23

im in a terrible mood today!!!!

first of all because i stink! i don't know why. maybe it's hormonal or i ate something or idk. but i smell so bad! not like sweat but like a general bad odor like what's going on????

secondly, the master's degree bullshit is pissing me off! i spent the whole day writing a cover letter for this shit and i hate it. thank god for chatgpt but it doesn't help as much as i hoped it could. i mean i still have to come up with dumb shit about myself and sound enthusiastic. and i hate it!!!

and then i have no idea how to even apply! everything is online, i don't understand shit. the only way to contact people is by email and i hate emails. why can't i just call or talk to someone in person so that they could explain things to me and show how it's done? apparently i need to reapply to my uni as if i were a new student. but when i enter my student number an error message pops up like "you're already enrolled". like yeah, but it said i had to do it again! then there's also a button that says "id like to reenroll" but it sends you to a fucking contact form that says "we will reply within 3 business days". so i left a message like "hello! id like to reenroll please!". what am i supposed to do???

and then, cherry on top, i was like okay i'll deal with this reenrollment shit later, let's try to apply for the specific master's program through their online application thing. and ive already talked to a couple of people about my case and asked what i should do about the english exam bc im fluent but i don't have any like technical proof of it. and everyone was like yeahh it's fineee, you don't need a certificate if you're fluent. so i go on their online application thing and i literally can't go to the next page if i don't upload the english certificate! it says "if english is your mother tongue this is not mandatory" and at the same time when i want to go to the next page it says "this field is mandatory". so what do i do? upload a blank page?? oh and wait for it! i need another certificate no one fucking told me about! guess what it is!!! a fucking iq test!!! okay not like THE iq test but a thing called gre. and i googled what it is and it's this like fucking analytical reasoning test or whatever. and it's also racist.

and im sorry, not to be all like "i have 999 iq" but i do maths okay..?? what more proof do you need that im not stupid? qUanTiTaTiVe rEaSoNiNg how about you quantishut the fuck up!?!!!? like im smart enough to do maths but not smart enough to do a fucking economics degree when economics is basically astrology for straight people.??? like give me a break. i already declined taking an actual iq test because iq is racist and i don't want to partake in racist things. and now there's this fucking gdr bullshit. and it costs 200 bucks to take!!!! for what????

anyway i sent an email like "umm i am not taking any expensive ass exams um no thanks". like dude why can't i just go to the fucking manager of the faculty or whoever the fuck and give them my cover letter and ask my questions? noooo i have to write fucking emails and fill in their fucking contact forms. like all of this could be solved in a 5 minute conversation.

also, third thing, i went to see the students union today because i have a bone to pick with my functional analysis professor. that's a whole different story. but anyway, i wanted to know if anything could be done about that. like can i possibly refuse the grade i got bc it was unfair? huge respect to the union btw, i love them, they occupied the cafeteria last year and now we have cheap lunches, it's great. and so yeah i went to see them to ask for advice and they guided me quite well but they also asked how everyone else felt about the exam in question. and i would love to know but no one in my class wanted to talk to me about it! i sent a message today, no one replied. and then this evening i insisted and guess what! one guy replied to my message like "not to be mean, but the exam was easy".

like broooo if you're a fucking functional analysis genius good for you!!! do you want a medal or what?? the guy is a child prodigy and with all due respect, i didn't ask his opinion! like good for you if you found it easy but when you're the exception to the rule maybe you should just like not ruin it for everyone! and what's with the "not to be mean"??? why did he have to phrase it like that? like he could've just said that he found it easy and that's it. now it sounds mean when you say it like that!

anyway, im stinky and angry and all i want to do is first of all take a shower but also cuddle with my ex and not think about anything and be in love and not have to worry about uni and degrees and functional analysis and all this crap. </3

[maximumcupcakereview]

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Billy Buffalo We Are All 3 Damar Hamlin Shirt

DESCRIPTION

SHIPPING & MANUFACTURING INFO

TEEJEEP

Billy Buffalo We Are All 3 Damar Hamlin Shirt

So, I’ve been working at this company for nearly a Billy Buffalo We Are All 3 Damar Hamlin Shirt from January. I needed a job as was being made redundant and this popped up so I took it, it’s a night shift but work is work. Now, after about three months, I was asked by my colleague if I could cover his shift as he had an evening event to go to which I said that’s fine I came to find out it was a company event where everyone is invited to it but me. I shrugged it off as I thought I’m new so I guess they had it booked for a while. Kinda still sucked having to cover someone’s shift though as they were having fun and I’m stuck in the office. Anyways, fast forward to about a month ago I was doing paperwork and I came across an email stating Christmas party, I brought it up with my colleague he said is there? To which I said yeah at this place he said oh yeah I know I’m going to that. I was struck as I had not been approached or invited to it, what makes it worse is as there has been a boom in work lately they have took on about 6 new people about 3 months ago and they have all been added to the guess list and they class each other now as “family” while I’m stuck covering the guys shift and I was told I need to have the on call phone over Christmas because he has a family?! Well so do I!!!

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Custom orders are always welcome. We can customize all of our designs to your needs! Please feel free to contact us if you have any questions.

PAYMENT DO WE ACCEPT?

We currently accept the following forms of payment:

Credit Or Debit Cards: We accept Visa, Mastercard, American Express, Discover, Diners Club, JCB, Union Pay and Apple Pay from customers worldwide.

PayPal: PayPal allows members to have a personal account linked to any bank account or credit card for easy payment at checkout.

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SHIPPING & MANUFACTURING INFO

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By contacting directly with suppliers, we are dedicated to provide you with the latest fashion with fair price.We redefine trends, design excellence and bring exceptional quality to satisfy the needs of every aspiring fashionista.

WHAT IS OUR MISSION?

Gearbloom is established with a clear vision: to provide the very latest products with compelling designs, exceptional value and superb customer service for everyone.

We offer a select choice of millions of Unique Designs for T-shirts, Hoodies, Mugs, Posters and more to cover all your needs.

WHY SHOP WITH US?

Why do customers come to

Well we think there are a few reasons:

BEST PRICING

Fashion field involves the best minds to carefully craft the design. The t-shirt industry is a very competitive field and involves many risks. The cost per t-shirt varies proportionally to the total quantity of t-shirts. We are manufacturing exceptional-quality t-shirts at a very competitive price.

PRINT QUALITY DIFFERENCE

We use only the best DTG printers available to produce the finest-quality images possible that won’t wash out of the shirts.

DELIVERY IS VERY FAST

Estimated shipping times:

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Man That’s Close Enough Shirt

[miekasa]

mie….could we please get college au eren headcanons👉🏽👈🏽

Of course. I’m always thinking about his big head anyway <33 might as well put it good use.

One thing he learned in college is how to make his hyperfocus/fixation episodes work for him; that’s why he schedules all his classes as close together as possible. He’d rather have class back to back for 5 hours, than have it spread out with hours in between lectures, because that increases his changes of cutting.

You can always tell when he’s in class and/or what class he’s in by how much he responds to your messages. If he doesn’t text back at all, he’s in a class that hard or one he enjoys, or both. But if he’s sending you iMessage games, then you know he’s in his elective that he couldn’t care else about (and is probably cheating in someway somehow lmfao). 

He usually puts his phone on dnd when he’s in a class that’s important, but you’re in his favorite contacts, so your messages always ring through. What if it’s an emergency and you need him for something? Advanced Roots of Human Biology can wait. 

Some days there are one or two our breaks between his lectures, that’s just how the scheduling works out. When that happens, he usually sneaks into one of your lectures, or goes to your place to take a nap. Your roommates have become accustomed to him, honestly they’ve been considering giving him a key. 

Once, he didn’t realize that your lecture was basically a seminar, with you, the prof and maybe six other students. He still stayed lmao, and the prof was so amazed by his dedication, that she didn’t even mind. Occasionally, you’ll catch the two of them talking after lecture. It’s pretty cute the way she’s adopted him into the class even tho he’s not on the roster. 

You... have to show him where the library is lmfao. He genuinely has not stepped foot in one until you bring him to one. He likes it tho lmao once he gets used to it. 

Speaking of which, do not give him standard directions to find your classes on campus because all you’ll get is, “Babe, I’m gonna keep it real with you, I’ve never heard of the ‘West Quad’ a day in my life. What building are you near.”

He usually comes to see you in the library after all his lectures are done for the day. Sometimes he does homework, sometimes he’s just fucking around on his computer, sometimes he’s just bothering you. When you have to leave to go to class, he stays behind to watch your stuff so you don’t have to pack everything up and come back. 

Very protective when it comes to keeping your seat for you. No, you cannot take that chair to your table you good for nothing freshman; it’s reserved for you. 

He’ll drag you out of the library if you’ve been cooped up all day, tho. Eren will use his height and his strength against you to get you up. Placates you with kisses when he sees your angry expression, and promises to buy you food.

He takes your backpack for you when you’re walking together,m. His backpack is frustratingly light all the time, even during midterms. You swear all he’s got in there is a pencil and some flashcards. 

If you have night classes, he sticks around to walk you home after, especially in the winter when it gets dark faster. If he’s not already on campus, he’ll walk/drive back to meet you; he just doesn’t like you going home alone. Even if your friend/roommate is in the class with you, Eren will walk or drive the both of you home for his own sanity. 

He plays sports, so he usually has practice most evenings, but he’ll find a way to make time. If practice was particularly brutal, he’ll probably crash at your place.

He loves it when you come to meet him after practice. His whole face lights up and he waves obnoxiously, before he gathers up his stuff and all but sprints towards you. You get a cold water bottle to the face, or a bit of water splashed on you usually, which he takes immense amusement in. 

He knows it’s not possible for you to make it to all of his games, and usually it doesn’t bother him much; you’ve got your own life, and work to worry about. All he asks is that you wear his jersey, or any item of his sports apparel/merch on game day (he’s partial to hoodies).

By the time junior year rolls around, he’s not all that interested in attending parties that aren’t hosted by your friends; so, unless it’s at Connie, Jean, or Reiner and Bertholdt’s place, Eren will usually decline. Even team parties, he’s not crazy about unless it’s to celebrate a championship or something. He’d much rather celebrate with you. 

He does get excited about hosting parties though, and he and Jean become pretty damn good co-hosts. They don’t throw ragers, and that’s probably why Eren likes it so much. It’s usually your friend group and a couple plus ones, some good music, games, weed, and take-out. 

He’ll buy you coffee whenever you ask for it. The first time, he just orders something plain, not really knowing the difference between anything; but give it two or three tries, and he’ll get it perfect. He becomes so good that he can order you something new/different and you’ll love it. 

That’s kind of the start of his own coffee addiction, and more often than not, when he buys you a cup, he’s on his second or third of the day himself. The flavor has really grown on him, okay. 

He much prefers your apartment, but on occasion, he’ll ask you to come to his. You’ve been studying for so long, a change of environment should do you good, he claims. He’s a fucking liar tho because that’s all Eren Talk for “I do genuinely want you to come over, but my plans are to coerce you out of doing your assignments and doing me instead.”

Lmfao he adds you on Apple Watch Rings just so you can see him close his rings every day and laugh at you. Even if yours get closed by virtue of walking around campus or working out or whatever, his numbers are stupidly high because he fucking has practice at least 4 days of the week. 

Of course when you’re running on a soccer field for 2 hours every day, you close your Move Ring five times, Eren. Leave the rest of us alone. 

He buys you guys matching accessories for your keychains. It’s something pretty cute, and slightly random, but it reminded him of you. It also serves as a reminder to himself to take his fucking keys with him when he leaves his house. 

He sleeps like a fucking rock, so do not let him fall asleep in the library. Waking him up is a mission, and he’s never happy to be woken up. He looks kinda cute tho. 

He schedules dates for you and his friends. Usually by accident, but hear me out. Sometimes he’ll make plans with Armin, then forget that he has class or a test or something; so his solution is to text you, “hey, i forgot min and i were supposed to go some aquarium tomorrow but i have a midterm so here’s the pdf of my ticket, go with him for me, thanks babe love u” then, boop, you and Armin have an aquarium date Friday evening. 

The same thing happens with Mikasa, though, she usually catches the scheduling conflict before Eren does, and invites you out herself. You and Mikasa hang out quite a bit anyway, so it comes to the point where she tells you when she’s gonna hang out with Eren, so you can make yourself free for when he inevitably remember he has a game that day. 

Mikasa is most amazed that you’ve put up with Eren this long lmao. You’ve certainly lessened her Eren & Armin babysitting hours, and for that she’s eternally grateful. Also, she’s just happy to have another close friend. She loves Eren and Armin, but they’re not the most social beings, and she was literally their only friend besides the other for all their childhood PLEASE she’s so happy you’re around. 

It’s Mikasa, however, who babysits you and Eren whenever you both get too drunk. Says you guys are two peas in a pod (affectionate<2)

If you tell Eren something important that happened, like an internship you got, or a good grade in a class, or something, he usually relays that information to his mom pls. He texts her every day, and if she doesn’t ask for an update on you first, he gives her one.

Carla calls you sometimes, too. At least once every few weeks, just to check on you herself. She really likes you for Eren, and is grateful someone is willing to put up with her hotheaded son. 

Eren’s always using your fucking chapstick. Always. You know he has his own, so why he needs to use yours is beyond you. Finds time to make some dumbass comment about how it’s an “indirect kiss” every time he uses it too. Like bro, we’re dating, and have had many direct kisses why are you like this.

He posts on Instagram every few weeks or so, but you’re on his story every few days. Usually, it’s just a video of you minding your business and doing your work while Eren slowly zooms in before making some loud noise to surprise you, all so he can get your reaction on video and laugh at it. He’s annoying. 

He’s a bit of a copycat when it comes to the products you use. He’ll buy the same brand of pens as you (for that matter, all of his school supplies mirror yours because what does he know about the difference between A4 and A5 notebooks?), put a little hand sanitizer on his backpack like yours (and a lotion, too, for good measure), he even copies your Starbucks order until he finds one he likes for himself. It’s one of his love languages <3

If you’re wondering where your eyelash curler went, Eren stole it to try it on himself, hurt himself, vowed to never use it again, went back because he wanted to “do it right and not give up,” liked the results when he didn’t pinch his eyelid, and now it’s his. 

That being said, stop trying to put your Fenty lipgloss on him, it’s never going to happen. Eye makeup, maybe, only if you sit in his lap and he can have his hands on your ass while you do it. 

What he does love is letting you do his skincare. He will set aside dedicated skincare nights, he adores it. Easily one of his favorite things ever. 

You have his wallet. Not because he’s your sugar daddy or anything (although, if you want something, he’d definitely let you use his card to get it; and even if you bought something without asking, he wouldn’t think twice about it), but because he put it in your bag once and never took it out. 

When you tried to give it back, he just shook his head and told you to keep it, “I have my ID in my phone case anyway, and you’re less likely to lose it. Plus I put all my cards on Apple Pay, so I’m good.”

When you do make it to a game of his, he’s all over you when it’s over. Not in a cocky athlete boyfriend kind of way; in a very sleepy boyfriend kind of way. He’s usually got ice on at least one part of his body, and he’s got half his body weight on you as you walk to the car. 

By the time you guys get back to your place, he’s practically sleep walking. The only thing on his mind is taking a hot shower to soothe his muscles, and heading to bed. The aftermath of game days aren’t all that bad though, because even if you didn’t show, you’re always there to kiss him when he’s home and massage his shoulders, and cuddle him to sleep; and that’s his favorite part.