#incorrect chat

[incorrect9-1-1]

Bobby to the crew: Once again, I will remind all of you that I love you all equally.

Hen: That is bullshit if I've ever heard it.

Chimney: What did I eat for breakfast, cap?! Tell me what I had for breakfast!!!

Buck: Huh? Didn't Bobby make some chocolate blueberry pancakes for everyone?

Eddie: No, babe. That was just for you.

Ravi: It's true. I was there, man.

[instantlystrangeimaginellama]

Elfo: You like me platonically for my personality?

Bean: I’m just as surprised as you are

[aventurineswife]

[county-lucio]

feeling hamburger of course jeje

[ashenquill]

Tim seems like the type to have a Snapchat story dedicated to his crashouts

He frequently posts videos of himself yelling about the idiots he encounters in his daily life, and people live for it.

Tim, in his car: I AM SO FUCKING SICK OF BAD DRIVERS! IF YOU WANT TO DRIVE LIKE A PRE-SCHOOLER, THEN PULL UP IN THE LITTLE TYKES COZY COUPE, MOTHERFUCKER. I AM TWO SECONDS AWAY FROM REAR-ENDING YOU! AT LEAST THEN YOU MIGHT BE ABLE TO GO THE FUCKING SPEED LIMIT

Tim, barely visible and whisper-shouting in a dark closet: If I have to deal with Lex Motherfucking Luthor one more time I might just have to commit a felony about it. Because what do you mean you "aren't familiar" with our DEI policy outline???? We've been doing business for years????? We've had this EXACT CONVERSATION, like, TEN TIMES--

Tim, not even bothering to find an empty room: I should have stayed an only child.

Dick’s voice offscreen: Huh?

Tim, deadpan: The only good outcome of having siblings is that if they threaten to kill me, I might actually get a fucking break —— assuming they can grow a spine long enough to actually make good on their threats, that is.

Dick, in the background: C’mon, Tim you guys just quit fighting— Damian, stop- DAMIAN

Damian, now in frame, making a spirited attempt to free himself from the upside-down hold he has been wrangled into by attacking Dick’s ankles: I only wish to give him what he wants, Richard!

Dick: No, Dami, what did we say about- STOP BITING ME

Tim, staring deadpan at the camera while the others fight behind him: I have never envied Jason Todd more in my life

[treatop]

after he started dating marinette

inspired by this picture:

[comfortcharacterprompts]

Lucifer: It’s dark in here Mc: Don’t worry, I got this. Mc: *Stomps their feet* Mc: *Skechers light up*

[collectivefandomstuff]

[on patrol]

Red Robin: [sitting on a rooftop, drinking hot cocoa]

Red Hood: [lands next to him and sits down, pulling out a sandwich]

Red Robin: [holds out a thermos] want some cocoa?

Red Hood: [takes the thermos] yeah, thanks. [offers his sandwich] Want a bite? I baked the bread

Red Robin: hell yes

Red Hood: quiet night tonight

Red Robin: [humms in agreement]

Red Robin and Red Hood: [watches the skyline in silence]

[Nightwing, covered in a slimy substance, flies past them through the air as though he’s been catapulted from a great distance]

Red Hood:

Red Robin:

Red Hood: do you think he saw us?

Red Robin: I don’t think so

Red Hood:

Red Robin:

Red Hood: we can’t all be fighting Ivy, there wouldn’t be anyone left to fight the other criminals

Red Robin: that’s a sound argument. Say while we were helping him someone robbed the mayor, then where would we be?

Red Hood: he definitely came from over by the library, that’s way outside both our routes

Red Robin: so we agree that we wouldn’t be doing our job if we left our post to help with whatever that goop was

Red Hood: definitely

Red Robin: the mayor will thank us

Red Hood:

Red Robin: [sips his cocoa]

Red Hood: cards on the table- I already robbed the mayor earlier tonight

[tiger-grace]

Bruce: Okay, Damian. You need to promise to be good for the Doctor, they’re not an enemy in disguise trying to administer poison. We’ve known her for years.

Damian: The clinic is by crime alley! She most certainly owns several firearms that she could use as soon as I’m incapacitated!

Jason, raising his pistol: Firearms?

Bruce: No, Jason, no guns. We’ve spoken about this.

Damian: Anyone could be a part of a test from my grandfather! We need to be prepared!

Bruce: It’s just a vaccine shot!

Jason, very slowly raising his pistol: ..Shot?

[surelyimisheard]

he's literally shy

[incorrect9-1-1]

[blackcatsandlockets]

Remus: *sneezes*

Regulus: Bless you.

Pandora: *sneezes*

Regulus: Dora are you okay? Are you sick? *takes off his jacket* Here take my jacket. Do you want a blanket? Soup? Medication?

Sirius: *sneezes*

Regulus: Shut the fuck up.

[aventurineswife]

[zziridian]

Mephistopheles: as an exchange student I'd expect better

Mc: my apologies mitochondria

Mephistopheles: WHAT

Mc:??

Mephistopheles: say my name

Mc: mesopotamia

Mephistopheles: nope

Mc: Metropolis

Mephistopheles: try again

Mc: Mumbojumbo? Malarkey?Magazine?Microwave oven?

Mephistopheles: I am leaving

Mc: IM SORRY MOZZARELLA

For the life of me I can't pronounce Mephistopheles

[mammons-lover]

Prank Gone Pregnant [Happy New Years!]

MC (grinning mischievously at Mammon's camera): Hey guys, welcome back! Today, I’m going to prank my boyfriend by pretending to break up with him. Let’s see how hard he panics. Spoiler: It’s Mammon, so… a lot. Let’s do this.

MC (fake sniffling, eyes cast down): Mammon, sweetie…

Mammon (striding over dramatically, already looking concerned): Yeah, babe? What’s wrong? You okay?

MC (turning their head away to stifle a laugh, voice trembling for effect): I think… it’s time we break—

Mammon (interrupting with wide eyes, completely serious): I’m pregnant.

MC (now genuinely stunned, blinking): Wait. What?

Mammon (doubling down like his life depends on it, hand over his heart): Yeah, you heard me. Pregnant. Bun in the oven. Lil’ Mammon Jr. on the way.

MC (trying not to lose it, but also trying to keep it logical): Mammon, that’s literally not possible. You’re a—

Mammon (jumping to his feet, hands on hips, voice dripping with indignation): Oh, so now you don’t want OUR baby?!

MC (deadpan): You’re male!

Mammon (scoffing like this is the least of their concerns): And I’m also a demon, something ya didn’t even know existed till you landed here! Maybe you need to stop slackin’ in bio class, MC!

MC (completely breaking character, laughing): Oh my god, I love you, babe. And I love how far you’re willing to go to keep me, but—

Mammon (dropping to his knees mid-sentence, clutching at MC’s hands dramatically): Please don’t leave me! I’ll DIE! I’ll do anything! Beg, grovel, get a second job, whatever you want!

MC (still giggling): Mammon! Let me finish! I was gonna say it’s a prank!

Mammon (pausing, looking betrayed): A PRANK?! You got me cryin’ over here for a PRANK?!

MC (trying to hold in laughter, patting his shoulder): I’m sorry, but once you hit me with the ‘I’m pregnant’, I had to see this through!

Mammon (standing dramatically, wiping his tears): Well, guess what? You’re not sleepin’ in my bed tonight. And we’re OVER.

MC (mock-pouting): Aw, c’mon, Mammon, don’t be like that—

Mammon (cutting them off immediately, arms crossed but already relenting): No, wait, I take it back. We ain’t over. But I’m still mad. You’re on thin ice!

MC (grinning): I’ll make it up to you with snacks?

Mammon (grumbling, but already caving): …Fine. But only ‘cause I’m pregnant and I need to eat for two!

(Enter Leviathan, standing nearby with headphones half-off, looking completely bewildered as he stares after them.)

Leviathan: Wait. WHAT THE FUCK?! Mammon’s PREGNANT?!

Mammon (yelling back over his shoulder): Yeah, Levi! Start plannin’ the baby shower!

Leviathan (suddenly panicking, pacing): Oh my daivolo, I’m gonna be an uncle! We need to babyproof the house! There’s sharp corners everywhere, and that stair railing is a death trap! Do demons even have car seats?! Someone get me a checklist—WHERE’S THE CHECKLIST?!

{Haven’t posted any fics lately? Uhh… do we even call these fics? 🤔 Who knows! Anyway, I seriously miss making them, but college is not what I expected (first semester, woo-hoo! 🥲) and, uh… I'm definitely failing three classes. BUT!! I’ve figured out how to balance college and life, so next semester is gonna be great!. I miss writing, though, so you better believe more is coming soon! Stay tuned, besties!}

[writersmorgue]

Why is the picture quality shit. Idk.

Thank you @yourlunarspice 💕💕💕