#it would make SENSE and would be hilarious

[freakartack]

Okay. This is going to be an extremely weird question, especially since I have the opposite mario alien tism

How would orbulon react to the shroobs :0 I'm just curious

NOT WEIRD i fucking love thinking about warioware's connection with the Greater Mario Universe, which I am also unhealthily obsessed with. In fact I'll do you one better:

ORBULON'S RANKINGS OF VARIOUS ALIENS IN THE MARIO SERIES*

*Not including things that are only aliens by virtue of being in mario galaxy

Shroobs

Going to talk about them as a collective here (so this includes all shrooboids and shroobsworths and whatnot), but first of all I fucking love the shroobs. I think the concept of a fungus alien that weaponizes mycorrhizae is ingenious, and their blank little gaping mouth expression is hilarious. THAT BEING SAID, orbulon would be a little less receptive to them. Given that he's been trying to take over the world for 1000 years, and they almost conquered it in like 2 seconds, he would probably be scared shitless. 0/10 too scary

Tatanga

A lot of people ask me about this one. "Would tatanga and orbulon be buddies? They are both aliens that worked for wario!" And to that I say no. Yes, they are both diminutive little aliens bent on conquering the world. However, so are Shroobs. Not only would orbulon be similarly intimidated by someone way more competent at doing so than his lazy ass, but tatanga, notably, does NOT respect women - he kidnapped the resident red-haired girl to try and force her to become his bride, something that would not fly with orbulon given that he is best friends with a red-haired girl and is also occassionally one himself. Furthermore, while Orbulon works for Wario because Wario offered him a place to stay in his hour of need and they are friends, Tatanga worked for Wario because he was really mad that their mutual enemy stopped him from forcing someone to become his bride. (This was also during Wario's evil phase, so he didn't really care about that as long as Mario got walloped. Which he didn't. Good going, Tatanga.) Fortunately, Orbulon never had to cross paths with tatanga due to my pet theory that he was asleep for the entirety of Super Mario Land. 2/10 incel

X-Nauts

You may be sensing a pattern here. This is another one that Orbulon is not a fan of, but this is also one that he's actually around for. Unlike the invasion of the Shroobs, which he was around for but not invested in Earth beyond a potential conquest yet, or the invasion of Tatanga, which he was asleep for and didn't find out about until he woke up to a million missed notifications on his dashboard about Unknown Spacecrafts Near You, this happened around the events of Warioware Touched (if you decide to view mario games as happening concurrently with wario games released at the same time, which is a fun thought exercise if you ignore enough things.) SO, if we arranged the timeline just so, we could pretend that he had an experience like this:

1/10 their advancements in synthetic organisms are fascinating

Squirps

There is absolutely no chance of Squirps and Orbulon interacting or having interacted. Which is a shame, because they'd probably get along better than most aliens on this list. Squirps would probably regard Orbulon as a weird old man, despite technically being at most half a century younger than him. Orbulon would think he was a cute kid but likely be overwhelmed by his energy as Squirps runs laps around him (similar to Kat and Ana). 7/10 just make sure he doesn't bite you

E.C.

10/10 they go out for drinks every friday

[tiny-huts]

I think Sos'umptu makes the most sense as Minthara's mom for multiple reasons but it is hilarious because Sos'umptu is the only house Baenre priestess who would have had an absolute conniption when Minthara came home with a fucking house Baenre tattoo. Mom tries to talk you into having a spider shaped cover up so you don't look like such a fucking arrogant HERETIC ASMR

[dominimoonbeam]

The Truth in Your Skin - 14

ANGST! Okay, so we're adding some body image moments to the tags here and a sexual harassment tag. I feeeeel like you're all well and truly buckled up for the threat of danger and angst in this fic because of the Quinn past (and possible future, who knows, I'm dramatic like that) but this isn't Quinn or Darlin, so we're adding a new tag!! <3 <3

Thanks for getting this far. Hope you enjoy the fic! <3 From the start over on ao3.

Darlin/David, Milo/Sweetheart, Asher/Huxley

chapter tags: sexual harassment, body image issues, violence, communication issues, avoidance, doubt, hurt/comfort

The Truth in Your Skin - 14

“So… You’re apartment hunting?” Asher asked.

Milo nodded, sprawled out in Asher’s chair and scrolling on his phone. “It makes sense.”

Asher raised a pierced eyebrow and leaned against the wall. “Right… Because you’re a couple.”

Milo raspberried but didn’t take his eyes off his phone. “No, because we’re great friends and even better roommates. You should see these listings they were looking at. No fucking way they’re moving in with some stranger. Do you know how many creeps there are out there?”

Asher laughed. “So, the logical step, is to get a bigger apartment so that the two of you can be… roommates?”

Milo nodded at his phone.

The back door thumped shut and David walked in. “What’s going on?” he asked automatically as he started setting up the shop.

Asher waved a hand at Milo. “Looks like the idiots are officially moving in together… as roommates.”

David glanced over at Milo and then huffed a laugh. “Sounds about right. When are you two going to get a pet?”

Milo sat up, seeming to just then realize David was there. “We were looking at cats the other day.”

Asher laughed and David tried not to.

Milo frowned. “What?”

They laughed harder.

Milo rolled his eyes. “Fuck you guys. Are we still going to that out of town game this weekend?”

Asher nodded. “Yeah. Road trip!” His smile got sly. “You and Sweets sharing a hotel room?”

Milo wrinkled his nose. “Of course. Why would we pay for two? That’s stupid.”

“Yeah… you two are all about frugality,” David agreed in a mumble.

The front door chimed.

“That’s probably my one o’clock.” Asher shooed Milo out of his chair on his way to the front. He was still smiling when he stepped out to the front desk and saw the vaguely familiar face waiting for him. One of Huxley’s teammates had called about getting a piece done and set up the appointment.

After handshakes and niceties, he led him back.

Milo was gone, probably off to pick out curtains with Sweetheart. God, they were hilarious. He wasn’t sure he’d ever known any couple more fucking coupley than those two.

“Nice place,” the client, Colt, said.

David turned the music on on his way to the front with a stack of paperwork in hand.

“Thanks,” Asher said, gesturing him to have a seat and pulling out the sketch they’d talked about. It wasn’t a big piece.

Colt clapped his hands. “I’m getting the VIP treatment right? The Huxley special?”

Asher laughed and shrugged. “Sure.” He put his gloves on and told the guy to drop his jeans. He wanted to tattoo on his thigh, after all. He was already shaved, so it was just a matter of disinfecting the area before putting the stencil down. “You’ve got other tattoos right?”

“Oh yeah.” Colt nodded, pushing a sleeve up to show ink from wrist to elbow.

“Good, then this shouldn’t be any surprise.” Asher smiled and prepped the needle. He had a couple more clients today and then he was meeting up with Hux for dinner.

He settled into a good position and then gave the guy one last look. “You’re good?”

A thumbs up and a big grin.

Asher started the needle. “So how long have you and Hux played together?” he asked, starting the linework. Not everyone liked to talk while they got work done but Asher was great at rolling out questions if they liked the distraction.

“Years,” Colt said. “I gotta say, I was real fucking surprised when he started bringing you to events.”

Asher didn’t look up from his work. “Yeah? Why?”

Colt snorted. “I mean, you don’t exactly look like most of the puck bunnies, you know? And Hux has never brought a date. We were all starting to think he was like, not into anything, you know? Turns out he’s just into weird.”

Asher stopped, suddenly feeling heat rush his face. Weird?

Colt laughed. “But who’s not into weird sometimes, right?”

Before Asher could even start to unpack what this guy was saying, a big hand slid over the back of his head.

Asher shot to his feet, knocking the hand off of him.

Colt stared up at him, looking so honestly confused and smiley that Asher thought he might have hallucinated this conversation. And then he noticed the very obvious erection bulging the front of Colt’s boxer briefs.

Asher frowned. “Do you need a minute?”

“Oh, I’ll last more than a minute…”

“Dude, you see that I’m holding a needle, right?” Asher held it up.

Colt grinned. “Yeah. I figure, you mark me and then I’ll mark you. Like with Huxley.”

Asher felt like his brain was rebooting too slowly. What the actual fuck was happening right now?

It wasn’t like he hadn’t had clients flirt with him before. But this was…

His heart pounded in his throat but he just stood there, caught between work and whatever the hell this guy was saying to him. Did Huxley think that? Had he said that? No. No fucking way.

And then, before he could finish that brain reboot, David came out of fucking nowhere.

Colt’s surprise was worse than Asher’s, because David grabbed him by the front of the shirt and hauled him up out of the chair, his jeans still around his ankles and two lines of a tattoo on his thigh.

Asher flicked the needle off, still stunned, but listened to the guy shouting and laughing and trying to calm David on that awkward drag to the front door.

The bell chimed and David threw the other big guy right out onto the street. His voice was so low that Asher couldn’t catch the words, but there was definitely a threat there. And then the door closed with another snap of the bell and the locks slid into place.

Asher felt like his face was on fire. He hurried to move before David came back, starting the process of cleaning up his station just like he had a thousand times before.

“Who was that?” David asked.

Asher shook his head and shrugged.

David caught his arm to make him stand upright and stop trying to clean up. He put one big hand against the side of Asher’s neck and made him look back at him. There were so many questions and concerns in David’s gaze. “Who the fuck was that?” he asked again.

Asher sighed. “Just some guy from Hux’s team. He said he wanted a tattoo. I didn’t know he… would…” He waved a hand, floundering for words.

David nodded, that angry crease in his brow. “You’re okay?”

“Yeah. Yeah, of course.” Asher took a step back and gestured at himself like it was proof.

“Ash,” David said, voice weighted in seriousness.

Asher looked at him.

“You can punch clients that pull shit like that.”

“What?”

“You hesitated. I know this is our business and you’re used to being the nice one, but you can turn that off and just kick them the fuck out.”

Asher nodded. That made sense. Yeah. And he knew where that line was out in clubs. Asher could definitely handle himself.

“Just imagine it’s someone else.”

“What?”

“Imagine it’s one of Milo’s clients and what you’d do then.”

Asher laughed, surprising himself and relieved to feel that gross feeling in his chest loosen. “Milo would have punched him.”

David snorted. “Bad example.”

Asher sighed and nodded, shaking it off. It wasn’t his first time dealing with a creep. But this guy had known Huxley, had talked like… “What an asshole,” Asher said with a shrug.

David nodded but his mouth pinched, eyes still on Asher.

Asher realized he was still worried and laughed, clapping his shoulder. “Look at you playing hero, though! Damn you were quick to haul him out.”

“Haul who out?” Darlin asked, walking in the back door with a big yawn like they’d just woken up.

“I had a creepy client and David straight up bounced him!”

Darlin stopped, blinking at them. “Seriously?”

Asher nodded, back to cleaning up. He wanted to get rid of every bit of evidence this guy had been there… but he didn’t rush, because he could still feel David sneaking glances at him. “Turns out Davey missed his true calling—bouncer.”

Darlin smiled, shrugging out of their jacket. “I thought you said his true calling was line cook?”

Asher shook his head. “New true calling.” Weird. He was weird. Did Huxley think he was weird? No way Hux said that sort of stuff… right?

-

Huxley stood in the locker room, frowning at his phone after practice. Asher had cancelled on dinner last night and wasn’t sure he could meet up tonight either. That was okay, of course, but… But there was something off about it that Hux couldn’t quite explain.

-are you ok? He typed the words but hesitated to send them, just staring at them. Was it somehow too needy to ask? They were still new, and Asher wasn’t saying anything was wrong. He was just… off?

The sound of some of the other players coming down the hall spilled through the doors ahead of them.

Hux sent the question, leaning against his locker and watching the screen.

The group of his teammates burst into the locker room on the other side, unaware of him for now. Which was great, because as soon as they spotted him, there was no way they’d let him mop around with his phone.

“You’re an asshole, Colt,” Riley said, putting a laugh on it but sounding like he was actually mad. He didn’t usually get mad, so it almost took Huxley’s focus from his phone.

His message was read. Asher was typing…

“You saw him! Why wouldn’t I try to get some strange too?” Colt snapped back on the other side of the lockers, gear thumping into the floor and benches.

“Huxley’s going to lay you out if you don’t watch it,” Riley warned.

Huxley looked up at his name. What the fuck were they talking about?

Colt sputtered. “Hux loves me. And it was just a joke. That fucking freak didn’t even finish the damn tattoo!”

Huxley heart pounded. His text conversation bumped up.

-yeah

-100

-see you tomorrow maybe?

Hux still had his phone in his hand when he came around the lockers.

Riley saw him first, standing straighter and looking more resigned than caught. Probably because he wasn’t the one caught, right?

“What?” Colt barked and then turned to see Huxley right there behind him. Hux wasn’t sure what the hell he was talking about, but the flash of panic and guilt on his friend’s face before he covered it up with that ugly twist of attitude told him too much. Colt had definitely done something. “When—”

“What did you do?”

Colt shook his head. “Nothing. What are you talking about?” He wouldn’t tell him. He had never admitted to shit when he fucked up.

Hux held up a hand, having to pull it back to keep from pushing the guy in front of him. His moms always said no pushing off the ice. Problems should be handled with words. He looked at Riley. They’d all played together for years. Riley looked angry. Which was why Hux was pretty damn sure he should be angry. “What did he do?”

Colt rolled his eyes and threw his helmet at his locker. “Come on! I didn’t do shit!”

Hux didn’t look at him. He just looked at Riley and waited.

Some of the other guys were looking shamefaced and anywhere but at the scene.

Riley nodded.

“Shut the fuck up!” Colt warned before Riley even started. But it didn’t stop him.

“Dipshit here went to your boyfriend’s shop to get a tattoo yesterday. He ran his mouth and made a move. Like he thought he was getting a happy ending or something. Got kicked out.”

Huxley stared, trying to process that. Ran his mouth? At Asher? A happy ending? He swung toward Colt, who jumped back for the first time in their friendship. “What the fuck?”

Colt laughed, hands up at his sides. “Dude! I was just messing around! It’s not my fault if goth puck bunny took it serious!”

“What did you say to him?”

“What?”

“What did you do?” Huxley ground out each word, the whole fucking locker room gone silent around them.

Colt’s face twisted from surprised to scorned. He shoved forward, pushing into Huxley’s space. “You can’t blame me for wanting to know what’s got you drooling over that metal-faced freak! Is it the tongue ring?” He grinned. “Is it—”

Huxley snapped his head forward, the same way he had a hundred times on the ice, knocking his head right into Colt’s. It should have hurt, but it didn’t. Colt fell back and as soon as he had the space, Huxley threw a punch that turned him face-first into the locker and sent him sliding to the floor.

Riley nodded like this had been the obvious and only outcome, back to working his gear off. “He told your guy he wanted the Huxley special. Only got a couple lines into the tattoo before he got kicked out.”

Colt groaned on the floor, coming to.

Huxley looked at his phone in his hand again and those last messages from Asher telling him they were 100 when they definitely weren’t. He stepped over Colt and grabbed his shit from his locker before storming out.

He called Asher on his way to his truck. What was he even going to say? What the fuck had happened?

Colt had said so many mean things. Had he said that shit to Asher? Had he hurt him?

Asher didn’t answer and Huxley shoved his phone back in his pocket and unlocked his truck.

-

Asher rubbed the steam off the mirror in the bathroom and then stepped back, music blaring through the apartment. He pushed his wet hair out of his face and looked at his reflection.

Weird.

Why did it keep coming up in his thoughts? Why did he care?

Weird.

It had never bothered him before.

David thumped his fist on the door and shouted over the music, “We’re heading out. Be back tonight!”

Asher nodded even though no one could see, still looking at himself. “Yeah. Have fun!”

He waited, wondering if he’d heard the door shut. It was impossible to hear.

Why hadn’t he just gone out with Hux tonight? He missed him. But his stomach hurt when he thought about actually seeing him. He’d have to tell him what happened… Would he even believe him? What if it was something he’d said to his teammates? What if he was embarrassed? What if Asher really was like a weird fling?

“Fuck.” He dropped his head forward, scrubbing a hand over his face. He had never been insecure like this before. But he liked Huxley. Like, really really fucking liked him. What if this was a real issue?

He looked at himself again, leaning closer, eyeing those piercings in his face.

No one was home.

He took the piercings out, trying not to think too much about what he was doing and why. It wasn’t a big deal. He was just looking at something. He put the last one down, his chin low, and forced his eyes up to his reflection again. Reaching up, he covered the ink on his temple sneaking out from his hairline, tilting his face so as not to see the one on his neck. His heart hurt.

No.

Nope.

He shook his head, even with tears in his eyes. He couldn’t change who he was and he didn’t want to. Even just thinking about it was hollowing him out in a way he could tell would wreck him. He liked Huxley a lot, but what was the point if Huxley didn’t really like him? What was the point if he tried to be someone else?

He picked up one of his eyebrow bars but a bang on the bathroom door made him jump and drop the damn thing. “Damn it!”

“Ash?” Huxley called over the music, Asher barely registering the familiar voice before the door was open and they were staring at each other.

Asher blinked and then huffed a laugh. This had to be the worst week. He was totally naked, piercings out, in his bathroom with the music still blasting through the apartment and looking at the last person he wanted to see him right now in the doorway. “Hi.”

-

Huxley had caught David and Darlin in the hall on their way out on a date. He could hear the music through the apartment door.

It was sheer luck that David let him in. There was no way Asher would have heard him over the music.

He realized pretty quickly that he was in the bathroom and almost barged in before thinking better of it and knocking first. But then he heard Asher swear inside and opened the door anyway.

They stared at each other.

Asher was naked and gorgeous but… but all his face piercings were out.

“Hi,” Asher said.

“Hi,” Huxley said and then winced because he had just busted in on the other guy. “Sorry. I tried to call. We…We need to talk.”

Asher’s tight smile fell, along with his chin. He nodded and grabbed his briefs, pulling them on. “Yeah. Yeah, okay. Let me get dressed and I’ll meet you in the living room?”

Huxley nodded and backed away, turning down the hall for the living room and trying to figure out how exactly to have this conversation. How was he supposed to ask about what happened when Asher hadn’t told him? He wanted to apologize but he wasn’t even sure for what.

Asher took longer than he’d expected but when he came down the hall, Huxley realized why. His piercings were back in. Well, all but one of the eyebrow studs.

He went to the speaker and turned off the music, and then he stayed there across the room from him, leaning against the wall, waiting.

“I heard… I heard Colt came to your studio yesterday,” he said, watching Asher. He looked so far away, his arms folded and his shoulder against the wall.

Asher winced, gaze finally meeting his but it was a mix of anger and nerves. “He came onto me.” The words burst out of him, like he thought Huxley might have thought otherwise? “He… He’s kind of an asshole.”

Huxley nodded, stepping closer. “He’s a huge asshole,” he agreed. “I’m so sorry that happened. Whatever he said… I’m sorry, Ash.”

Asher blinked at him and then slowly pushed off the wall, arms unfolding. “Is this… Is this what you wanted to talk about?”

Huxley felt as confused as his boyfriend looked. “Yeah? I mean… this is why you cancelled on me, right? Why you’re avoiding me?”

“I’m not avoiding… I was just…” He sighed. “I just needed to think and I knew when I saw you, I’d have to tell you about it and I wasn’t ready.”

Huxley nodded. That made sense. “I wish you felt like you could have told me what happened yesterday, but I get it.” He took another step closer, wanting so much to close that gap between them but scared that it wasn’t just physical. “Wait. What did you think we were going to talk about?” What else could there be but this?

Asher exhaled hard, almost a laugh but too tight to make it. He shrugged. “I mean, I thought you were breaking up with me.”

Huxley almost lost his footing. “What? Why?”

Asher waved a hand. “The whole Colt thing and what he said about…” the words cut off and he looked sick. “I just—”

“What did he say?”

Asher shook his head, one hand going to his brow, touching the stud that was there and then the spot where one was missing. He wouldn’t quite look at Huxley. “I don’t know, man. He just threw me and I guess I thought… And he seems like the kind of douchebag who’s going to tell everyone he got what he wanted even if David threw him on his ass, right?”

Huxley took a step closer, catching those fragments of information. “You thought I’d believed him?”

Asher winced and that hand moved from his face to his scalp, clawing fingers through his hair. “I mean, maybe? You’ve known him longer than me.”

“I don’t know him,” Huxley said. “I’ve played with him for years, but I don’t know him. I don’t want to know him. But I want to know you, and you wouldn’t do that. I’m sorry this happened. Can you… Can you tell me exactly what happened?” And why it had clearly freaked him out so bad? This was more than worrying that he’d believe some lies.

Asher exhaled some of that tension in his lean body, finally taking a step closer to Huxley, meeting him in the middle of the little living room. “I’m sorry. I guess I just spun out.” He touched Huxley’s wrist, the gesture somewhere between casual and exploratory, like he wasn’t really sure what would happen.

Huxley turned his arm, collecting Asher’s hand in his, relieved beyond belief for that contact and that invitation to nearness. His other hand touched the side of Asher’s face. “No, dude, don’t downplay it. You’re upset.”

Asher smiled but it was a ghost of the real thing. “I’m okay! So much better now.”

Huxley nodded slowly. This was all still new and he was just as tempted to lean into the idea of getting back to how they usually were, but Asher had looked so hurt… “Listen. I know you can handle yourself and you can probably handle whatever this is, but I’m right here. You could tell me. Sometimes it helps to say it.”

Asher stared up at him, so close now. His thin smile fell and after another stretch of thinking, he dropped his head, looking at a point on Huxley’s chest. “He said some shit about how he was surprised to find out you were into weird. …who’s not into weird sometimes? he said. He wanted the Huxley special. I was starting a thigh tat and he grabbed the back of my head. Said I’d mark him and then he’d mark me…just like you.”

Huxley had to hold his breath to keep from reacting. Fury fluttered in his chest, but he focused on Asher’s cheek so soft under the sweep of his thumb. This wasn’t about his anger.

Asher sighed, cringing. “I wasn’t scared or anything. I could have tossed him out myself. I just… I thought he was a friend of yours and then I had to wonder if…”

“If I’d said that?”

Asher closed his eyes and shook his head. “I know you wouldn’t but… I mean. We’ve been going to these team get-togethers with the other partners and families and I get it. I stick out. What if I am just some strange you’re getting out of your system?” As soon as he said it, he winced and shook his head again. “I’m sorry.”

Huxley gently lifted his face to get him to look at him. “Hey. No. We’ve been together for a few months, man. You get to have doubts and I am so fucking sorry I didn’t notice you were worried about this. You are the kindest, funniest, sexiest person I have ever met. You’re not strange or weird. You’re you. You’re perfect, Asher.”

Asher stared back at him, eyes big, hand squeezing his. “Damn…”

“What?”

Asher smiled slowly. “That’s the nicest thing anyone’s ever said to me.”

Huxley exhaled a laugh. “Well, I’ll say it whenever you want to hear it. I’ll say it until you’re sick of it.”

Asher shook his head, leaning in until their hips and stomachs were pressed together. “Not possible.” He kissed him.

Huxley kissed him back, fireworks of relief going off behind his eyelids. The kiss was slow and easy, not demanding or pushing for more, just reaffirming and reveling in that connection. When they broke for air, he leaned his forehead to Asher’s. “I’m sorry about yesterday,” he whispered again.

Asher sighed but it was light now. “Not your fault. I really should have punched him though…”

“I knocked him out in the locker room before coming over here…” he admitted, expecting to feel bad about it eventually but not yet.

Asher pulled his head back to look at him. “Did you really?”

Huxley nodded.

Asher grinned. “Thanks.”

[punkeropercyjackson]

Jason Todd takes dump by someone who's read every single issue he's ever been in and watched/played almost all his adaptions

He's afro-dominican,specifically monoracial and a third gen inmigrant on both Catherine and Willis' sides.He's strongfeatured and darkfeatured and his green eyes are a warmer/softer shade instead of the 'staring into your soul' meme

He's also jacked(fat + buff)and overly muscular Jason is unattractive while skinny pale Jason is unfitting

He's transmasc agender and partially identifies as a girl hence freely uses 'ftm' for himself and is a butch but in a goth punk way

He's also demisexual and bipan

Triple A(Austim,Adhd and Anxiety)with ptsd and also cluster b(bpd and npd)

The best love interest for him is/would've been a black Super who's Clark and Lois' adoptive kid and his childhood best friend that grew up to join The Outlaws due to their history

Og Rhato was an absolute disgrace to his character and he hates Roy fullstop and Roy should've hated him back instead of being a pussy.Kory deserves Dick and the Titan Girls forever and ever and the former dosen't even have to be romantic,she just has to be important to him and her own fufilled character too.JASON for that matter deserved to reunite with Eddie and him,Rose,Artemis,Kyle,Duke and Thad along with a bunch of other properly written characters should've been The Outlaws,including ones introduced in Rhato itself so it would an actual superhero team run

Duke should've been not only an official Robin that was adopted by Bruce a bit after Zero Year but JASON'S Robin with him being Duke's Robin too.Jason would literally rather die again than be part of 'The Batboys' without Duke and that's why it being so accepted in fanon pisses me off so much because it shows zero care for transracial adoption representation('transracial' meaning 'adopted child that's in a different race family')and how it's inherently more interesting and nuanced storytelling than every 'Bruce adopts every kid he meets' edition.Duke deserves his own special relathionships instead of having to share or settle when nobody else does or has too

He hates being sexually degraded and objectified and considers it as bad as his death being used against him because he sees it as another form of violation of his personhood.The reverse is also true so when it comes sex and even just romance,he's all about consent and if someone won't respect his they have zero chance or appeal to him

Normies do nothing for him.He's t4t,autistic4autistic and poc4poc strictly no exceptions and he dosen't actively seek out dating because he thinks platonic love and familial love are more important

The Tim beef is not only hilarious but top notch writing because for once the white boys don't give a fuck about eachother and perfer the girlies and the poc.90s Young Justice,the Robin 1993 gang and Tam is wayyyy better as a cast for Tim than Jason could ever be too

Jayrose and Jaytemis are very good ships because Rose and Artemis keep their personalities around Jason and they have belivable reasons to be attracted to eachother within dynamic and individual characters too.Jaykyle has excellent potential but people who make it horny should just admit they're racist and want Kyle to be Jason's pet moc and Jayeddie should've been what they tried to make Jayr*y as it actually works with Eddie and there's no overlap between him and Roy unless you're shallow and bad at writing

'Wonder Woman fan Jason' is rather tokenish and unathentic and also i just don't think he'd like Diana that much at any point at all tbh.His childhood superheroine idol is Starfire because it makes way more sense(and no,not because of the Dick,it's because Kory is exactly what he admires in women in general)

Alchoholic/smoker Jason are not just canon contradicted but not sexy.It's better to give him comical vices like ridicilously bad for you food and being a pro-gamer

'Robin!Jason is an altruistic,peppy optimistic softboy who's a huge nerd in both meanings of the word and lowkey loserish but also has the bite losing his parents and living as a street kid for years gave him and is a little shit' supremacy or nothing

He listens to My Chemical Romance,classic punk bands and rap the most

He's NOT like Dean Winchester,Deadpool or Danny Fenton and saying so is an insult to his character because he'd hate them if they met

He IS like Percy Jackson,Miles Morales and Ichigo Kurosaki and it needs to be said way more since it's actually accurate

Trans woman Jason is just Marceline Abadeer /pos

If he were a supernatural creature,he'd be a werewolf

Talia is the only acceptable adoptive mom for him and making jokes about ThatTM scene in Lost Days is no better than batcest but with the added layer of violent racialized misogyny.Momlia is also better if Jason's afrolatino because we need more brown/black family dynamics that're healthy and wholesome

'Shiva is Jason's biomom' is gross and offensive to Cass and y'all know damn well him thinking she could be his mom was the writers being racist weirdos,NOT Jason looking wasian.Cass and Jason being on good terms can be well-written but they would NEVER be eachother's favorites and Cass' story is a femalecentric one by design

Stephanie and him are meant to be found siblings and J*ysteph is gross because it's literally just a cishet crack ship version of Stephcass and 'tis exactly why Jason should be her brother for parallels instead of erasure.They're also just not compatible romantically or funny for the bit,it's misogynistic towards her and looks bad on him thanks dating his little brother's ex.Also make Stephanie black too you weirdos and i mean BLACK,not 'blonde blue eyes loose curly hair and badly drawn melanin'.Dead Robins Club is A+ and him and Damian already have good dynamic,no notes

Dick and him should be close since his Robin days with Dick also playing a pseudo-parental role as is the natural order for eldest siblings BUT Dick should written as themself,not an adultchild.Neither of them would ever care about Slade because they're not chronically online white gays who think being anti-kink is code for queerphobia

And him being a Jane Austen fan is him being pretentious but it's funny so it's fine

[narrynukezankielover]

I love that in this scene (ep 9) Dean once again defends Cas to Ezekiel/Gadriel. Ezekiel/Gadriel asking Dean what he’s going to do about Cas being around them and Dean gets pissed off. He says that Cas is the one that the angels are after and yet he’s fighting. He wonders what Ezekiel/Gadriel is afraid of. Cas has been on earth for like 6 years and I’m happy to see him understanding human things. He could tell that every time Sam brought up Cas leaving the bunker Dean changed the subject and Cas waited until he was alone with Dean to ask him about that. He understands that Dean changing the subject meant there was something Dean didn’t want to talk about with Sam in the room. Back in season 4 Cas wouldn’t have understood that and probably would’ve said something at the wrong time. Then the fact that Cas knew that Dean is in a tough situation and even though he wants to be around Dean he knew he had to listen to Dean.

I’m pretty much just adding this part because Cas looks amazing. I don’t like that he’s being tortured and that he has blood on him but I love seeing him half naked. I will say there was soooo many missed opportunities with human Cas. I would’ve loved to seen Dean teaching Cas to cook or to shave or even something stupid like tieing his shoelaces. In my opinion they didn’t think this storyline completely out. There’s a few things that happened that don’t make sense. Like how did that angel (April I think her name was) find Cas since he had the tattoo?

In ep 9 Dean tells Cas they have to stay away from each other and at the end of that ep Cas says he should stay away from Dean and the very next ep (ep 10) Dean calls Cas for help and Cas comes right away. I would love to know what happened to Cas tie. He obviously magics up his suit and trench coat considering when he got out of purgatory he was still wearing the clothes he got from the mental hospital then when he came out of the bathroom he had his suit on so where is his tie now? I also love how Dean is looking at Cas here. He obviously loves looking at Cas in his suit (the ep where Cas gets out of purgatory proves that) and Cas is letting Dean look.

This scene is hilarious. There’s an angel, a human and the king of hell and the human takes over. It’s Cas car (I’d love to know how Cas learned to drive) yet Dean just goes directly to the drivers side and tells Crowley to get in the back which he listens to Dean (at that point Crowley is handcuffed so he doesn’t have powers) and tells Cas to get in the back with Crowley and Cas listens to him. Cas and Dean will literally do anything the other asks them to do. Another cute thing I noticed Crowley said to Cas riddle me this boy wonder. Riddle me this is what the Riddler says and he is a villain so obviously Crowley is calling himself a villain (he’s the king of hell obviously he’s a villain) but Dean is in the scene and Jensen has voiced Batman a few times. Boy wonder is Robin which is Batmans sidekick so Crowley is calling Cas Deans sidekick.

Dean finally apologizes to Cas for not telling him about Gadriel possessing Sam snd kicking Cas out of the bunker and I love that Cas completely understood what was going on and that Dean really thought Sams life was in danger. This scene also had my second favourite quote so far in the show Dean says we’re dumbasses and Cas says I prefer the word trusting less dumb less ass.

This scene is interesting. Pretty much since Cas and Dean have known each other Dean says whatever he wants to to Cas without any fear that Cas will hurt him because he knows he’s the one person Cas won’t hurt. Cas gets pissed off when he finds out the angel possessing Sam is Gadriel and that Gadriel is the reason for all the bad stuff that has happened to earth and Dean clearly knows that Cas is pissed off because he puts his hands up. To me he is showing Cas that he knows that Cas is an extremely strong angel even with his stolen grace (at this point at least) and can kill anyone if he wants to and right now Cas wants to kill Gadriel but Dean knows he has to calm Cas down so they can get Gadriel out of Sam.

To me (ep11) this shows how much Dean trusts Cas. Crowley is trying to look at the journal but Dean pulls it away from him. Back in season 8 Cas was picking through Deans stuff and looking through the journal and Dean didn’t care. Even in the scene when Naomi comes to Dean and Dean says he doesn’t trust angels which means I don’t trust you. Obviously that scene was about Dean not putting the signs on the boat so Cas would be able to come back to him but it does show Cas is the exception to that rule. Plus in the ep before this Dean was willing to let Cas possess Sam to get Gadriel out. He knows how much trouble letting Gadriel possess Sam made but Cas is the one angel he trusts would get Gadriel out and wouldn’t hurt Sam in the process.

I love that here Cas is trying to defend Dean to Sam. I don’t think Sam understands that Dean lied to Cas too but Cas got over it.

I love how honest Cas is. He’s always been truthful about how much he doesn’t like Sam. Cas has said that he doesn’t like the sound of Sams voice and other such things. I found it interesting that Cas said that before he became human he would’ve pushed the needle into Sams neck and killed him because the ends always justifies the means but now that he’s had human emotions he no longer feels that way. I find it interesting because even before Cas was human Cas would never do something like that to Dean. He didn’t need human emotions to feel like that for Dean. I personally don’t see Cas and Sam as friends I see them as putting up with each other for Dean. I do think that them spending that time together did help them not to become friends but to understand each other better and be able to be around each other if Deans not around.

[jkriordanverse]

₊˚.⋆☾⋆Max and Xander hcs₊˚.⋆☾⋆

₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

- they can rap, and they love goofing off during sleepovers (self explanitory) it also annoys Grayson bc he thinks some of the lyrics don't make sense (and is gramatically incorrect lmaoo) - They love trying out the dumb things on tik tok (which may or may not have resulted in a fire but that's beside the point) - Once tried to make smoothies for everyone but forgot to close the lid.... - Memorised the entire Bee movie script and sometimes make references to it that nobody understands - Max learned French for the sole purpose of cussing and saying the most hilarious things so that nobody would understand (beside Grayson bc i think he speaks French) she has an accent tho. - I think they tried to skateboard once, although Max isn't that good - They love skating rinks, especially the little penguin seating for anyone who doesn't know how to skate - Sometimes they'd tape memes and pictures of celebrity heads in unexpected places and wait until someone notices it (like taping Ed Sheeran's head on an egg bc ed sheeran -> egg sheeran) - super competitive during easter - They ADORE instant noodles. Love eating it raw (its just better that way take my advice) - Have tried to dye each other's hair - When Xander lost his eyebrow Max tried to draw it back for him but he moved too much and it looked bigger than his natural one. Nobody questioned it. - they will glady eat icecream for dinner - tried to make instant noodles once. Forgot to watch it and the eggs and noodles spilled all out and on top of that the water made the pot (? idk what to call it like ik the name in my native language) pot pan thing got stuck (yes i have done this before yes i did not know how to remove it)

₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

[milky-fixx]

toshiro hitsugaya + "beach"

900 words. fluff. adult!toshiro just being a Mom at the beach, but also a simp. idk he’s just sassy.

Toshiro hates the heat, but he likes you. That's how the two of you end up at a beach getaway in the World of the Living. While he had his protests—

(“I have paperwork to catch up on.”

“Let your Lieutenant do it for you!”

“Rangiku? Actually doing her work? Hilarious.”

“You need a break!”)

—you were dead-set on your vacation and had your sales pitch ready.

(“We can eat watermelon shaved ice and build sandcastles, or use your zanpakto to make ice sculptures, or whatever you want! We can walk along the beach when it’s cooler in the evenings."

Not entirely convinced, he opened his mouth to retort when you pulled out your ace card. Your last resort.

“Plus… I may know a way to get Matsumoto to finish her tasks for a few days.”

“…Fine.”)

He was sold.

Truthfully, he did need a vacation. His sense of duty just made him a hardass about accepting one.

Plus... it meant he got to spend more time with you.

Pressing the back of his hand to his brow—it's sticky, with sweat, he notices sourly—he follows just a few paces behind you as you flit about the beach. Despite himself, he feels a smile tug at the corner of his lips at your childlike wonder.

"Look, 'Shiro! It's a crab."

"We should catch one and cook it for dinner."

“Ahh, look how many pretty shells washed ashore.”

They were pretty, but he could think of someone with more beauty.

"Hm. They're nice."

"Do you want to build a sandcastle?”

"You'll get burnt," he says as he eyes your exposed skin.

Of course he slathered on as much sunscreen as he could before stepping onto the beach. Yet you denied his offer to rub some onto you with a wave of your palm, a simple boast of how you simply tan in the sun.

How opposite the two of you are, yet how well you mesh together.

He's been told he’s cold, like the winter personified, like the reiatsu that constantly shrouds him. You're warm, almost burning in intensity, like the summer heat that threatens to melt through him. You're in your element here.

Nonetheless he’s watching you intently to make sure your skin doesn't burn.

Maybe he also just likes looking at you, so carefree. He could just reach out and press his lips against your sun-kissed complexion—

He shakes his head to rid himself of the urge. The heat seems to be seeping into his thoughts. He crouches down, picking up the bucket that you discarded. He takes a moment to note your height difference. Gone are the days when he was considered too young, where you towered over him. Now he can revel in the fact that you have to tip toe just to reach his chin.

"You're doing it wrong," he says as he observes your sand creation. “That kind of castle would never survive the tide."

He helps you, rolling his eyes good-naturedly as you fleck some sand at him in response to his critique. When you look away, he does the same, a sludge of sand slapping your knee. You gasp and he raises a brow.

He used to hate doing things that made him seem too childish, all too aware of how people saw him—as the young, inexperienced prodigy.

Yet with you... he finds your laughter infectious. Whether it's you giggling at the way a crab burrows its way into your castle, or even at how he gripes about the heat.

He finds he doesn’t mind indulging in these juvenile activities. When it’s with you.

You venture towards the shore in search of seashells as Toshiro pats more wet sand onto the base of your castle. It's only when you call his name triumphantly that he looks up.

His eyes widen.

Not because you're proudly holding up a conch, but because the tide is hurtling towards the shore behind you, threatening to engulf you.

You don't seem to notice.

"Watch out!” He’s moving before he can even speak, managing to grab you before water crashes onto the shore.

In a flurry of waves and movement, the both of you fall onto the sand, his arms cradling you to him. Water threatens to invade his nostrils but he exhales roughly. He nearly swallows a mouthful of it before the tide recedes.

And then he’s propped over you, on his hands and knees, water dripping from his hair onto you, the both of you sopping wet. You cough up some seawater, but you're fine. Toshiro's brows furrow.

"What were you thinking?" he says tersely.

You could've died. You worry him sick. He takes his eyes off of you for a few seconds and you nearly die.

"Were you even looking? You could've drowned—”

He's not sure who leaned in first, but the kiss interrupts him. Despite himself, he can't refuse, clutching you closer to him, pressing his lips against yours insistently.

You taste like salt and the sun and he wants you so badly.

But he also wants to keep you safe.

The two of you break apart with flushed cheeks and short breaths, and Toshiro huffs, pressing his forehead against yours.

"You're ridiculous, you know that."

"Yeah, but I'm your type of ridiculous."

Your giggle breaks off into a gasp as another tide washes over your bodies, this time gentler.

"That's it." He grumbles, jerking back his slicked hair as you cough up more water. He gets to his feet, reaching out a hand for you. "We're drying off."

[bridgertonandchocolate]

I’m slowly starting to come around on season 3 part 2. Still needing to really focus on the beautiful moments we got because I still have some of the same opinions I had before.

I did see a different perspective of Colin’s reaction and it’s made me come around a little so it’s easier for me to watch. I just still wish some of these points would have been introduced sooner. Like the fact that Colin is super sensitive. I wouldn’t have thought that at all about him before Violet just said it. I also reminded myself of something Colin said to Pen in season 2 episode 7 which was how she’s always been so constant and loyal to him so when he discovers her it now makes a little more sense why he feels so betrayed that this is something she kept from him. I still wish he would’ve come around sooner but you know.

Really hope they didn’t cut everything that was rumored to be cut out. Because I think they would have been essential.

Anyway regardless of all of that I now want two things:

1. A featherington spinoff. Would be comedy gold. Just the adventures of prudence and Philippa and navigating motherhood. Could be hilarious. No drama just pure comedy.

2. A movie starring Luke and Nic. Rom com would be great but I don’t care what it is. They’re so good together. The press tour ended up being more entertaining than Bridgerton and I just feel like we can’t have them just in Bridgerton. They need more projects together.

[flowerandblood]

Review from the Vatican

House of the Dragon Season 2 Episode 1

AGHHHH!!!!! I LOVED IT. I LOVED ITTTTT. I don't care what others think, I had tears in my eyes throughout the entire episode! I couldn't imagine a better season opener, really. It was fantastic first episode, better than the one from season one in my opinion.

Below are my spoiler thoughts and my husband's impressions – beware, comments section is not spoiler free.

Alicent x Criston???? Honestly, that's the only spoiler I got, but it was still worth it, lol! Their relationship is very interesting! I like the idea that Alicent kind of get what she always envied Rhaenyra. Scene in the Sept with her burning candles made me very emotional. And her trying to justify Aemond and Aegon? Her sending apologize letter to Rhaenyra? Heartbreaking!

Aegon trying to be a dad who cares and a good king in his weird, boorish way? Helaena saying that she is afraid and his response, that there's nothing to afraid of – then when she says that she is afraid of rats he looks around the chamber as if thinking that there are really rats there. When he nor the servants sees none he is going back into joking mood, not knowing what to do with her words. I love, loooove that we get a scene between them!

Helaena giving away her boy not knowing what to do? Helaena running away with her daughter? Helaena in complete shock, entering her mother's chamber, not even caring what is going on there?

I really like the change that they wanted them to kill Aemond, not Helaena's children. It has a lot, lot more sense for the plot for me (I know that some Team Green people will complain that they make them "look better" – I'm not any team and for me it just look more logical that you want son for a son that actually KILLED YOUR BABY.

Rhaenyra finding Luke's body and grieving? Jace talking to Cregan on the wall? Aemond being Aemond?

AMAZING

As to the Aemond: Aegon calling him a hound, but like, in some tender way, like: my brother will fucking destroy our enemies and protect our family. I love the feeling that Aemond deep down, as Otto said, want to PROVE himself, because he FUCKED UP so much.

And him teasing Criston Cole? My fucking God that was hilarious.

I loved Alicent × Otto conversation a lot too.

My husband really enjoyed the entire episode. Overall, I'm proud of him for understanding what was going on so well and we both laughed during the scene in the Throne Room with Aegon and Otto. He was surprised that Helaena gave up her son so easily and didn't really believe she did it: in my opinion, she just knew that if she didn't do it, they would kill her and her daughter too.

The next episode looks completely crazy. We'll see what happens in the brothel, aghhhh.

FUCKING JUSTICE FOR THE DOG. 🤬🤬🤬🤬

If you want, write about your thoughts, but please take into account that I will simply delete and block messages/comments that insult other fans or me. I invite you to a joyful and pleasant discussion!!!!!

[this-is-krikkit]

okay but good omens' third season has to mention tumblr's existence

i don't know how (i actually have a very clear idea how and will probably write smth about this exact idea either way), but i just wanted to say... it has to.

[butchfalin]

the funniest meltdown ive ever had was in college when i got so overstimulated that i could Not speak, including over text. one of my friends was trying to talk me through it but i was solely using emojis because they were easier than trying to come up with words so he started using primarily emojis as well just to make things feel balanced. this was not the Most effective strategy... until. he tried to ask me "you okay?" but the way he chose to do that was by sending "👉🏼👌🏼❓" and i was so shocked by suddenly being asked if i was dtf that i was like WHAT???? WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME?????????? and thus was verbal again

[goldensunset]

when people refer to canon story-relevant kingdom hearts games as ‘spinoffs’ it makes me sad not only for the obvious reasons i always say but also bc like man i WISH this series had spinoffs. imagine what they could do if they had permission from nomura to truly go off the rails and ignore the greater canon for a second and just do some fun whimsical plotless thing in an alternate universe. imagine a fishing/boating game on destiny islands. kh fighting game. it is an injustice that we have been deprived of kingdom karts. can anyone hear me

[weewoow-20706030]

Ever think about the fact that the Wayne's are such a big name and therefore would probably each have their own fanbases.

Obviously most Gothamites hate the rich and powerful, but the Wayne's are an exception. Eat the rich does not apply to them.

Like- people would 100% make edits of them any and all of them.

Dick loves edits of himself and although he has never said anything aloud you know he knows just by how he does things with that extra... Flourish. His fans eat it up every time. They would kill and be killed for him.

Bruce would live in willful ignorance over it all despite Dicks many many attempts to show Bruce his fanbase.

Tim is very popular among teenage girls. Very popular. He has somehow managed to pull many, many, women so it is canon he is popular among teenage girls. They make dumb little edits of him and make fan accs and get into online arguments for him. One of Bernards classmates actually runs one of these accounts. Tim doesn't pay much mind to it, but it does annoy him when they infantalise him (which fan bases have a tendency to do).

Jason rarely makes an appearance. So all edits of him are of the same 3 seconds of him in the background. But people still eat it up every time. They think he is some mysterious bad boy (he is not).

Damian has been infantalised to the moon and back, all the bats bros find this hilarious. Damian does not.

[yukipri]

Clone File: Morbs (YukiPri OC)

Basic info:

Name: Morbs Number Designation: CC-4413 Generation: 1 (0.9) Rank/Title: Chief Mortician of the GAR, Kamino Chief Mortuary Trainer (former) GAR Affiliation: Entire GAR, primarily stationed with the 212th Attack Battalion Character status: YukiPri Original Character

Disclaimer: Morbs' story will likely make more sense if you've read The Prime Override, as he's introduced with context in this fic. He will also make more sense if you've read about the other 2 clone medics mentioned in this file, Ashe and Stabber.

Backstory beneath cut!

Overview:

Clone morticians are specialists even among medics. Every clone medic knows the basics of how to care for the deceased, but in war, priority must always go to the living. As such, it is common to find only one clone mortician per star destroyer or permanent GAR base, with greater numbers stationed in Tipoca City or various Republic medical centers.

Morbs, or CC-4413, is considered the Chief of this group of medical specialists. He is the originator of the division, and was assigned to develop both the position and the training curriculum of clone morticians in tandem with Ashe’s primary medical training.

Prior to the start of the Clone Wars and through the early war period, Morbs oversaw the Tipoca City Primary Clone Morgue, which processed all clone bodies. There, he managed biopsies, distribution of cadavers, and the care and processing of all of the bodies of his deceased brothers. He also trained other clone morticians who had completed general medical training prerequisites and were approved by Ashe, as well as future Chief Medical Officers who were required to have completed hands-on training time in the morgue to earn their certifications.

Morbs would have been content to remain in this morgue for life, but as the main body of the GAR prepared for deployment, it became clear that the number of bodies being processed on Kamino would plummet. Morbs was reassigned to the front lines, where his expertise would see more active use, leaving his morgue behind in the hands of his assistants. He primarily travels with the 212th Attack Battalion, but frequently visits medical centers and goes where he is needed.

Background:

Morbs was one of five Generation 0.9 CCs selected by Nala Se to begin the development of the clone medical track. While all subsequent medics are CTs, the Generation 0.9 CCs underwent manual age acceleration, putting them physically ahead of their Generation 1 peers in chronological age. Morbs and his fellow CCs were test subjects used to establish the start of the medical specialization path before their younger brothers were of age to begin that training.

As CCs, they are overqualified for the general medical training that Nala Se is building, and Nala Se quickly turns to using them for other experiments as well. Their unique position as the first experimental medical clones gives Nala Se more oversight over them than any other clones, with far less supervision as well. They are “her” clones to test as she pleases.

In the depths of her labs, Nala Se conducts experiments that she had been banned from conducting on standard troopers by the contract with the Prime Clone, Jango Fett. Morbs later learns that these tests would be considered “torture,” and are illegal in the Republic. He and his brothers are tested for the physical limits that clones can reach, including tolerance for exposure to various stimulants such as heat or chemicals, as well as sensory limits such as their maximum threshold for pain. She also experiments with the potential for building up tolerance and even immunity to various drugs and poisons. She takes all of the data she gains and incorporates them into the medical training for the clones—thus, ensuring that her tests still fall under the scope of “developing medical training.”

Two of the five CCs perish as a result of these experiments. Ashe is ordered to decommission the third when he fails to meet Nala Se’s standards. This leaves Morbs and Ashe as the only survivors of their initial group. They cannot speak of their experiences to anyone else, as Nala Se is the only other witness. Not even Kote knows what they experienced. Between the two of them though, they can never forget that their senior medical positions were earned with blood.

Morbs has always been a quiet but keen observer, and knew from early on that Ashe has reasons for wanting to be in the medical track, and that this is a path that he’s chosen and is motivated to push through. Morbs is brought into the Ghosts’ plans relatively early, and having had the most first-hand experience seeing just what Ashe’s position entails, he wishes he could do more to help his brother. However, Morbs is also realistic, and knows that he doesn’t have the same passion and dedication driving him. He does what he can, but he can’t see himself being the medics’ leader that Ashe is. He feels guilty for not being able to offer to take Ashe’s place, when he’s the only one in a position who could. He tries to make up for it by loyally following him, and doing what he can as a supporter.

In addition to not having the drive, Morbs also feels he is cursed with misfortune. While he excels as a medic and not even Nala Se can find anything lacking in his record, most of the patients that Morbs touches seem to end up dead for reasons unrelated to his skills as a medic.

He’s assigned to oversee a group of cadets, who end up having a fatal genetic mutation that gives them all heart attacks while he’s on observation. The wing with patients that he oversees collapses due to an architectural problem, and they all die. He’s conducting a surgery, when the power goes out, and he’s unable to save his patient with the tools he has available. He tends to some brothers, who leave his exam room fine, but are killed in a training accident a few hours later. He’s assigned to take over a simple check up, and finds his patient already dead before he enters the room.

Every additional incident makes him increasingly uncomfortable with working with living patients. He knows he has the skills, but it doesn’t seem to matter, because most of his patients end up dead anyway. Statistically, it’s not impossible, but after a certain point it’s certainly improbable, and yet it continues to happen. Clones are rarely superstitious, as they have no cultural basis for it, but Morbs feels that there’s something absurdly wrong with the amount of death that seems to follow him everywhere.

He only feels that he’s safe for his brothers when working with those already dead. He can’t kill them if they’re dead before they’re even assigned to him. When Nala Se announces that a new mortuary sub-track will be added to the primary medical track, Morbs dives for it because he can’t think of a better position for himself. If death follows him, he might as well embrace it.

As he and Ashe are given more access to resources including those from outside of Kamino to help them develop their respective training curriculums, Morbs finds himself increasingly interested in not just the practical aspects of death, but also the more cultural and spiritual elements as well. It’s sparked by his own unluckiness and wondering if others have experienced the same, but is fed by his curiosity when he realizes that most nat-born cultures have different ways of processing death and grief that are deeply engrained in how they handle their dead. Nat-born lives are for the most part extremely foreign and utterly irrelevant to anything clones will likely ever experience, but death is almost universal. Morbs finds this fascinating.

The clones are brusquely told that they “march on,” when they die, as Mandalorians do. But why? Where do they march to, with whom? What is waiting there? If that is the inevitable eventual fate of all of them, regardless of Ashe’s or Kote’s efforts, shouldn’t it perhaps be Morbs’ job as the Chief Mortician to at least consider what happens after?

While Morbs has no answers for the afterlife, he certainly has many thoughts, which he shares with the silent cadavers who he works with. It seems like they can hear him, he thinks, for all that none of his words are spoken out loud.

While sitting in on a Ghosts meeting as they develop code words for their growing underground organization, Morbs mentions off-hand that their brothers who are dead, but aren’t, are, “Marching on to join Kote.”

It’s not his fault that their overseers failed to really explain what “marching on” means, nor really instill any true understanding of “glory” either. So if they choose to define it for themselves, with “marching on” meaning to join their other brothers (who may or may not be dead), and “glory” as fighting for their brothers, something tangible that they actually understand and care for…well. They are, after all, supposed to die for the glory of the Republic anyway. No one will question the language.

While most of Morbs’ brothers are exceedingly practical, and must be, Morbs finds his niche in thinking about the not practical. If having ways of respecting and mourning the dead helps all other sentients, why shouldn’t it help them too? Morbs experiments with how he thinks their dead should be treated, and the bodies in his morgue are, as always, his silent audience.

He grows to consider the dead bodies in the morgue “his men” in “his army.” After all, those who are also marked dead, but are actually just with the Ghosts, are also allowed to “consider serving” despite being equally dead on record. And are not the bodies that he repurposes to hide the missing bodies, the dead whose organs and limbs save the lives of their living brothers, not also serving their brothers? Just because they were unlucky, like Morbs, doesn’t mean that they aren’t still being helpful, aren’t still actively saving their brothers. Because that’s all what any of them want to do: help each other.

Morbs assigns himself their Commander, as he is in charge of them, cares for them, and directs their “campaigns.” The rows of cold lockers that house their bodies are “barracks.” He talks to them, praises their missions, and grieves for them when they finally march on to their second deaths via cremation, only after which they are truly gone.

While none of Morbs’ students go to quite the same level as Morbs himself in humanizing their deceased brothers, he makes sure that all of them leave his morgue with a firm understanding that even when dead, their brothers are still their brothers. Pieces of his ideology and treatment of bodies linger in all of the medics who handle their dead.

Morbs treats the dead as his men because he wants them to be able to live on just a bit longer, but admittedly that’s not all. It’s something that also helps with his guilt over not being able to assist Ashe in his decommissionings. He can’t stop those deaths any more than Ashe can, and he can’t even share in the pain of murdering them. But he can promise them, and can promise Ashe, that once their bodies leave Ashe’s blood-stained hands, that Morbs will welcome them gently to his morgue. That they’ll be treated tenderly, with humanity, and that their existences won’t mean nothing. That if they’re capable of it, Morbs will do whatever he can to ensure that they too can serve Kote before their bodies are gone.

Morbs likes to think it offers Ashe some comfort.

General Info:

Most clones have only ever heard of Morbs, who is extremely elusive. Even after deployment, he rarely leaves the morgue wing attached to medical. Whereas Ashe feels a complicated mixture of self-loathing and knowing that he’s unwelcome in other spaces because all other clones loathe him too, Morbs is simple. He likes being with his men, they’re his favorite group of clones. The living get plenty of attention amongst each other. He just is happier with his own men, and prioritizes giving them his own attention.

He’s eccentric and more than a little creepy, but his reputation means that many of his brothers are very curious about him. He has a strict “no one alive past this line” rule at the entrance of the morgue, with very few exceptions, so not even those who try to catch a glimpse of him while visiting medical have much luck. Spotting him outside the morgue is both like an exciting cryptid sighting, but also potentially a bad luck omen. Morbs is oblivious to the excitement his presence causes, as he’s usually just in a rush to get back to the morgue.

Morbs is so mysterious that only a very limited handful of his brothers knows how truly odd his habits are. He has an assigned bunk, but ignores it and sleeps in a specially padded cold locker so that he can “sleep in the barracks with his men.” He calls it his favorite bunk, and tells the other medics he wants to rest there when he one day inevitably dies. He will sometimes forget to take care of himself, ignoring his own living needs to eat, drink, exercise, hygiene, etc. until a medic, usually Stabber, drags him out of the morgue to handle it. Stabber thinks Morbs is an example of how truly unfair their genetic enhancements are, because Morbs somehow maintains his solid CC-class physique with essentially zero effort on his part.

Unlike Ashe, who wants to be out in the field, Morbs never wants to leave his morgue for anything. Once he has been relocated into the morgue on the Negotiator, he only steps out when absolutely necessary. He doesn’t want to see the sights of the outside galaxy, doesn’t want to see the people or try the foods. He thinks all air outside of the morgue that is not optimized for the preservation of clone bodies is distasteful. He especially hates heat, sunlight, and humidity, insisting that it will “cause us to decay faster.”

The one exception to this is if there is a morgue, funeral, cemetery, or something else death-related going on. He learned about other cultures’ death practices, and he’s admittedly still curious about them too, mostly in the context of whether there’s anything else he can do to improve the experience for his men. If the ship is planetside and there’s supposed to be a famous cemetery, he might be seen quickly slinking outside, face completely veiled to avoid exposure to the elements.

Relationships:

Morbs maintains a close relationship with Ashe, though it’s one he’ll rarely show in front of others, always maintaining a professional distance if they have company. But Ashe is the only living person that Morbs will seek out for company, always while Ashe is alone. Morbs is the only one who knows the extent of what Ashe suffered during his early training, and had experienced much of it with him. He is concerned about Ashe, but doesn’t offer medical help, as he feels Stabber does that enough, and he doesn’t trust himself to think of Ashe as a patient; that never ends well. He will instead offer Ashe silent company.

Morbs claims to despise Stabber, especially since he’s the one responsible for taking him away from his morgue on Tipoca City and forcing him onto a star destroyer. Because Stabber is the CMO of the 212th, prior to Ashe joining them, Morbs is forced to interact with him the most. Morbs doesn’t like Stabber because he considers the other medic, “far too alive.” Stabber’s high energy, movement, and noise levels all grate on Morbs’ preference for stillness and darkness. Still, he reluctantly respects Ashe’s former assistant’s skills as a medic, and will follow his orders.

He also won’t admit it, but Stabber was the one who gave him his name. Stabber had a habit of announcing that Ashe’s work buddy “has the morbs,” a phrase he’d picked up from one of Ashe’s training resources that he claims means “has emo vibes.” Stabber liked the sound of the word so much that he began shouting it every time he encountered Morbs, and it ended up sticking. Morbs pretends he doesn’t care, but secretly thinks it’s fitting.

On the other hand, Morbs has a surprisingly amicable relationship with the Jedi he interacts with most frequently, Obi-Wan. He was very leery of letting Obi-Wan come anywhere near the morgue, not trusting an outsider with his delicate men who are unable to defend themselves. However, Obi-Wan found Morbs’ ruminations and philosophies fascinating, and was easily able to bait him into a conversation by expressing interest. Despite being surrounded by war, Morbs often seems strangely detached from it, preferring to speak less about the realities of war and the gears that move it, and more about why various cultures frame death and the afterlife in certain ways. While the conversations are often melancholy in nature, Obi-Wan appreciates the strange normalcy of it, knowing that Morbs would likely have these same questions regardless of whether there was a war. Morbs likewise is invested in hearing about death traditions from an outside perspective.

While the other clones aboard the Negotiator were at first both morbidly fascinated by Morbs, they were discouraged from actually interacting with him because he says things like, “You should not be in here, unless you are dead. Unless you would like to be dead, in which case I can help you,” or, “Oh, well you don’t look like you’re dying. How unfortunate.” However, they gradually realize that Morbs is not as aloof as he first appears.

He isn’t opposed to speaking, as long as it’s about his men. They realize that while Morbs refuses to let any curious bystanders or unqualified personel enter the morgue for no reason, he’s always eager to learn more about those in his care. Clones who have lost brothers can always count on him wanting to hear about the deceased, and if they’re present in his morgue, Morbs may even allow them to visit. When the first clone brings Morbs some flowers, because he saw that some nat-borns planet-side were laying flowers by the graves of their lost loved ones, Morbs is tickled by the action. Clones are not granted proper graves, and those in Morbs’ morgue are still “on duty.” But Morbs creates a little sterilized shrine in a corner of medical close to the morgue, where he collects these offerings and allows his brothers to visit. If the tablet Morbs laid there is turned a certain way, Morbs knows that one of his brothers wishes to speak to him about someone deceased, and he slinks out of the morgue to listen to them.

Because Morbs is the Chief Mortician, he not only processes the bodies that pass in front of his own hands, but he obsessively goes over the reports sent to him by all other clone morticians and standard clone medics, who are in charge of marking all final fatalities. As such, he has the most comprehensive knowledge of all deceased clones. On the rare occasions that they are able to conduct larger, collective remembrances, if Morbs is available, he will often be called to lead them.

Obi-Wan observes that Morbs is acting almost like a priest or other religious leader, but Morbs scoffs at the idea. He has no intention of leading a religion; he just cares about his men.

And all of the clones will join his army, one day.

Appearance:

Morbs wears a modified version of the clone mortician uniform, a black version of the standard softshell white medic uniform. As the Chief Mortician, Morbs wears a longer knee-length version of the uniform, along with a black kama over it to signify his CC status. He also has a rank bar, and red shoulder pieces to show his personal training from Nala Se, like Ashe and Omega. He technically has armor, but he’s never worn most of it since his fitting, and he doesn’t plan on wearing it either. His men serve without wearing armor, so why should he? If the ship is ever boarded, he intends on going down with his men in the morgue, a plan that no one will allow him to follow through on.

The one piece of armor he does occasionally wear is his helmet, which is a black version of Ashe’s. He must occasionally process bodies that have been exposed to hazardous conditions, and in these cases, he’ll don his helmet for its filtration and advanced sensors. He is so utterly uninterested in his own armor that it was left unpainted, and Ashe decided to paint it black for him, so it can match Morbs’ aesthetic preferences. While Morbs never acknowledged the gesture, he shows his appreciation by not protesting when he’s told to wear it.

After leaving Kamino, he grows his hair long and wears it loosely tied back, because as a non-combatant, he isn’t limited to practical hair styles. The exact length changes constantly as he uses his own hair to create wigs and patches for any of his men who may have had their own hair damaged. He refuses to share his hair with anyone who isn’t dead.

He also gets tattooed, two dark lines dripping down his cheeks from his eyes. He saw nat-borns with the look in some funerary documentaries he watched as a cadet. He doesn’t know that what he saw was nat-borns with running makeup, but he likes the look because it looks like a trail of permanent black tears on his face. He takes it to be a metaphor that he is always thinking of his men.

Morbs also has deep permanent bags under his eyes. This is due to a mix of him constantly forgetting that he needs sleep, along with him not wanting to sleep because he has so many thoughts to ponder.

While he usually just wears his uniform, he has a veil that he throws over his head whenever he has to step outside of the ship or Republic medical facility for any length of time. He also has an ornamental headdress he’s fashioned for special occasions, such as when he has to welcome an exceptionally large number of men to his army, is conducting a field cremation, or is leading a remembrance. The headdress is created from shards of plastoid armor he’s had to pull from his men.

Note:

Morbs’ designation, CC-4413, was chosen because the number 4 means “death” in many Asian cultures, due to how it sounds similar to “death” in many Asian languages, including but not limited to my own Japanese/Chinese cultures. Tetraphobia, or the fear of the number 4, is a thing! The number Thirteen is an unlucky number in other cultures. The number “4413” felt fitting for this character who is so immersed in death and bad luck!

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Related links:

Clone File on Ashe

Clone File on Stabber

OR

Read them all on AO3

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[natelia-aldelliz]

1 : Soap never had any idea that woman wanted him carnally, he's not the most observant on that front (he never noticed Ghost flirting with him and thought his love was one-sided for the longest time, but tbf Ghost was also very discreet about it)

2 : He sewed the hat, eyepatch and hook himself, because he's the best uncle and then got distracted as he was wrapping it up, so now he's watching a tutorial on youtube about how to build a voice box. Honestly how hard could it be, he builds explosive devices as a hobby (listen, Price doesn't have to know)

3 : He is out to his family, but doesn't want his mum to know he has a boyfriend because he knows she'll insist on meeting him and welcoming him to the family and making a big deal out of this, and he knows that Ghost isn't ready for that.

4 : Christmas is obviously a very hard time for Ghost, but he is very very in love with Soap and some days still can't believe that it's mutual, but then his Johnny does something like that and his head gets quieter while he's melting a bit.

5 : For the people that didn't see my other post : the bird is a Caique parrot, and they're supposedly very energetic, a bit loud, medium sized, unintelligible, very friendly to what they consider their family, adventurous and danger prone, with an explosive personality and a hate of boredom, so basically the adhd bird.

[zakuramochi]

After watching the Hetalia english dub, the disparity between the interpretations of the Western and Eastern fandoms suddenly make a lot more sense… a lot of the lines were changed so much to cater to localization to the point that the characters’ personalities became completely warped from the Japanese version. 😯