#so my unconscious brain is always ready for the worst

[theroamingtrashcan]

Laying here trying to sleep, thinking about how I headcanon Moon Knight sleeps and how the only person who really knows this would be Layla.

Steven tosses and turns and has vivid dreams that leave him mumbling nonsense. He’s the worst of the three to share a bed with as his flopping around can make the bed move quite a bit. It’s really hard for Steven to fall into a deep sleep, especially after the events in Cairo. Layla tries to encourage him to drink calming tea or take melatonin before bed, and he usually listens. It helps, sometimes.

Jake’s sleeping puzzles Layla. He tends to find a comfortable position, then never leaves it. Not that he is getting better sleep than Steven, at the drop of a hat he’s awake and ready to defend him and Layla. When he is sleeping, he’s as stiff as a board. No tossing, no turning, just tense and unmoving.

Marc is the most sound sleeper of the bunch. Curled in the fetal position, Layla thinks he’s rather cute when asleep. Sometimes though he will wake Layla with shouting, as nightmares plague his unconscious brain. Like Steven this only got worse after Cairo. She grew used to this forever ago, and just gently holds him until peaceful sleep is able to find him once more.

[boothillssugarmomma]

The Night Frights

(Boothill x Fem!Reader)

cw-: mentions of death, scared Boothill, sweet Boothill, boyfriend Boothill

HC: Boothills reaction to a nightmare

🎀 authorsnote: I got this headcanon from @cheesecakethots and have permission to use it! I was so excited to write THISSS!

please don't steal my work!

🎀Taglist🎀HSR Master List🎀Other Lists🎀

So many horrors that Boothill had seen. All of those traumatic events. Left him with the galaxy's worst nightmares. The nightmares he didn't dare tell you about.

He always made sure if he woke up from a nightmare not to wake you up. Just to sit and calm down before glancing at you and taking in your beauty. Calming him quicker.

Today he had a pretty rough day at work, being a Galaxy Ranger wasn't always easy. He knew he'd have those nightmares again...and he didn't want to sleep.

As you two are watching a movie, cuddled in bed, you pet his hair softly. "I'm getting tired..." You yawn quietly, covering your mouth with your hand.

Boothill buried his face in the crook of your neck, inhaling your scent. He hummed in response, pulling himself closer to you.

"Yeah? Then go to sleep. You need it." He whispered, rubbing circles onto your skin with his metallic thumb.

"And so do you...you had a hard work day." You hum quietly against the top of his head.

Boothill chuckled, shaking his head.

"Don't worry about me, darlin'. I'll be fine. Always am. Yer the one who needs rest."

He mumbled against your neck.

You turn the TV off and shimmy down to rest against him. "Please try to sleep?" You whisper against his neck sleepily.

With a huff, he wrapped his arms around you, pressing his hand into the small of your back. He closed his eyes and exhaled through his nose. Boothill was never good at falling asleep, especially with how loud his thoughts were.

"Yeah, yeah. I'll try, don't worry 'bout me..."

As you drift off into a peaceful sleep, he found himself watching you. Even in your sleep you looked so beautiful. Boothill smiled and pulled you closer, resting his chin on top of your head.

He exhaled, feeling the tension in his metal shoulders fade away as he held you. With you in his arms, the nightmare plagued thoughts were forced to the back of his mind. The steady sighs you made and your breathing was all he could focus on. It was soothing to him in a way.

---

Boothill was peacefully asleep when a nightmare clawed its way into his mind. It was worse than the usual nightmares. Darker. Filled with twisted thoughts he thought he'd buried.

And finally, his brain shocked him in a way unimaginable to him.

Your death...painful...and cold...

He woke up with a gasp, his breathing heavy and forehead covered in a cold sweat. The nightmare he had was vivid and fresh in his mind. He couldn't stop himself from pulling you flush against him.

Waking you up without him realizing it. His steel fingers dig into your side, marks were probably forming, but you didn't care. You were confused, you'd never seen your boyfriend like this.

With a shaky exhale, his eyes flitted around the room wide and full of fear. His arm forming the gun you've seen many a time and pointing it at the door. He remained on edge, body tense and teeth bared as if he was ready for a fight.

It was a few moments before he calmed down, the realization that he was safe settling in. He lowered the gun arm as it reverted back to a hand.

Gently pulling your head into the crook of his neck he slowly laid back down, his breath shuddering as it leveled back out.

With the tension finally gone, Boothill found himself drifting back to sleep. This time the nightmare wasn't able to reach him as he held you close. It was the most sleep he'd gotten in a while.

His body was no longer tense, his body was back to being cool to the touch. He breathed out a shaky sigh, laying back down to nuzzle his face against your neck as he held himself close to you. Sleep took him over again, leaving him in peaceful unconsciousness.

---

That morning he didn't mention a word about it as he drank his oil at the breakfast table.

He sat across from you, drinking in silence. You'd noticed he avoided eye contact.

After a few moments, he spoke up, his voice rough and gravely.

"Are you feeling okay this morning, darlin'?"

"...yes I feel...fine." You smile softly, poking at your breakfast on the plate.

He hummed in response, his eyes still glued to the table. It was obvious something was on his mind. The uneasiness was written all over his face. But he was doing his best to play it off as nothing, not wanting to worry you.

There was an air of tension between you, something he was desperately trying to dispel. After a moment, he spoke again.

"You sure? Yer not lyin', are ya...?"

"No honey...I'm alright." You smile. "I slept great thanks to you..." You knew what happened obviously, you just didn't know why he won't talk about it.

But if he isn't ready...

That's ok with you. You'll still be there for him until he is ready.

He huffed, a slight smile making its way onto his face at your words. Despite the nightmare, he had slept rather peacefully while holding you close. "Yeah? That so? Well...glad to hear that."

He chuckled, taking a sip of his drink. There was a brief pause before he spoke again.

"Guess I did my job as yer big spoon, huh?"

"You did..." You smile leaning over the table to kiss his cheek. "Thank you for being there to protect me...my savior..."

Boothill couldn't help the pink that dusted his cheeks at your words and the kiss on his cheek. His heart warmed, butterflies swirling in his stomach. The thought of you being hurt made his chest ache. He chuckled shyly, shaking his head.

"Don' mention it...I'd...do anything to keep my darlin' safe. Kill anyone who tried to hurt ya, even lay down my own life to protect ya..."

"Thank you my Galaxy Ranger~" You get up to walk behind his chair, leaning over his shoulders, hands on his chest as you kiss his temple.

His heart skipped a few beats as you leaned over his shoulders, wrapping your arms around his chest. The way your hands splayed against his chest, the kiss on his temple, the sudden affection you were giving him...it was making his brain short-circuit.

Boothill had to catch his breath, a goofy grin on his face. "Yer gon' make me blush, darlin'. Ain't fair..."

"I love you..." You whisper. "And I'm always here for you..."

He exhaled, a lump forming in his throat. Hearing those three little words still made him weak. After all this time together, he still blushed and went weak at the knees. It made him feel like a lovestruck teenager again.

With a shaky exhale, he reached up to hold your hand.

"I love you too, darlin'. I... didn't want to worry you, but... I had a-"

You cut him off. "You don't have to explain yourself..." You murmur against his ear. "Tell me another day..."

Boothill's eyes water a bit, tears threatening to spill over. "T-Thank you..."

"Anytime my love...anytime..."

🎀End🎀

[j-shel-b]

Luke skywalker x reader

Find Love

Summary : you are in love with Luke but you are way too afraid of losing him.

Content/warnings : FLUFF, angst, fear of someone's death

Finding love was a pretty difficult thing in this world. Or rather, it was difficult to live with the prospect of losing it at any moment.

You had found love. In truth, your heart had found someone to love. The worst was that your brain also loved him.

You hated that idea. You had always done everything to get away from love and yet you were fooled.

He was nice and at first glance not your style. He was cute, yes, but nothing more. That was your mistake. You saw him as a friend. You got to know him and little by little your heart started to beat faster. You blushed and he had become the most beautiful man you had ever seen.

You were screwed. Completely screwed.

Luke Skywalker was his name. What could be worse than loving the man who had the most chance of dying among all those present in the rebel base where you were. You felt like you were playing a bad trick to yourself.

***

Sitting in the refectory, your breakfast in front of you, he quickly joined you.

"Y/n, ready to hear the rest of my story.

- Luke. Maybe later." Your quick smile and fleeting looks confused him a moment before he decided to act as if he had seen nothing.

"Why? I thought you were passionate about it."

- I am." It was too much the case.

He did not insist and began to eat in silence. Furtively your eyes passed from his hair, to his eyes, to his lips. Even the way his clothes fell on his shoulders. And you end up forcing yourself to focus on your own meal.

Even his attitude was perfect. You didn’t have to say anything, he understood and he kept you company, in silence. He was right there and didn’t expect anything in return. You could feel a heat in your chest. You wanted it to go away.

Your breakfast finished, his breakfast finished long before yours. He took your tray with his before you could protest.

Unconsciously you just waited for him to come back to you, which he immediately did holding out his arm that you bound to yours.

"What’s going on? He asked softly, almost whispering as you walk in the corridors, aimlessly.

- I don’t know. You said just as softly

- You are lying

- No." You may suddenly feel a sweet worry, so sweet that you know it's not your own.

"Luke." He plunged his blue eyes into yours by asking you through them to talk. "I’m not ready." He lowered his head a moment before looking forward.

"Can I at least do something?

You hesitated before saying those words, but, taking your courage in both hands, you did.

- Yes, leave me, please." He had both stopped you in the middle of your path, turning to you, now holding your arm with his hand.

"Am I the problem? He did not understand, you never asked him to go away from you, even for a moment.

- No. I just need to be alone." Smiling gently, you watch him shake his head with concern before deciding to greet him and cut off the touch of his hand on your arm. You still allow yourself a kiss on his cheek that you enjoyed too much before walking away. Leaving him alone, you look away from him.

***

That day seemed very long. You wondered too much how to see him as a friend. Losing a friend would not be any less painful but at least you could save yourself the pain of mourning a future together, as a team.. as a family.

Every person you spoke to that day seemed bland compared to him. All except R2-D2, who was not exactly a person and who therefore confirm the boredom you had felt.

Sitting in this small room, in front of R2, you take care of cleaning him while he talks incessantly, filling the place with those little noises that you had always found adorable. He was very funny and you’re laughing while focusing on your job. But you’re soon joined by someone else.

"You’re adorable when you laugh." And you stop laughing. You hear his footsteps as he comes to sit next to you.

"I asked you to leave me." The more he came back, the harder it would be to get him to leave.

"I know, normally I would have but I feel that if I go away, I will lose you. You feel his eyes looking at you as your movements become less and less precise. This leads R2 to complain.

- Excuse me, R2." He doesn’t seem to forgive you, and you see the little droid leaving saying that you are no longer focused, and even there he is adorable.

The silence comes back. You’re just the two of you and it’s way too intimate.

"You’re not going to lose me. You tell him as he shakes his head.

- In a way, yes. I don’t know which one. But I do. You can feel the tone of his voice change, he knows how to control his fear, but he still feels it.

- It can be a good thing. And you’re finally looking at him.

- What do you mean?

- I want to part with something, you’ll see it will be better for both of us. He doesn’t seem convinced.

- And.. What is it? You remain silent before giving him a sweet smile.

- Something that hurts too much."

You see in his eyes that he doesn’t understand anything. He doesn’t know what to think. Must he trust you or seek to know? But he knows he can do nothing to change your mind. Gently he put his hand on your shoulder.

"I’d really like you to talk to me. His hand moves on your neck and you can feel his thumb caressing the bottom of your cheek. You know how I feel about you. You can tell me anything.

- No, I don’t know anything, Luke." You say before you part with his contact, again and leave the room, leaving him alone.

***

You always assumed that your feelings were mutual. Your relationship was always ambiguous, which led you to flee it even more. But now he had put words, he had evoked his feelings.

You didn’t want to see him anymore. Every time you saw him, you went somewhere else. As far as you could. And everyone could see how sad he was.

He was the sunshine of the base with an innumerable dose of love and you always had a rather cold, distant personality. It wasn’t long before some people asked you questions to find out what had happened. Or rather to find out what you had done. It was asked with great kindness but it still hurted you.

Your routine had changed. Which made Luke never know where you were. He didn’t even see you at mealtimes, worried about whether you were eating enough. He was looking for you all the time. He had obligations but at every moment he hoped to see your figure.

You were master in the art of discretion, you hide without problems but you could not hide from his words. They were spinning in your head all the time.

You hated having so little control of yourself. But soon a situation forced you to be in the same room as him

You were the best fighter, the best shooter. A famous former headhunter (which you never mentioned, it was not your greatest pride) and you never hesitated to help others improve their levels. New recruits arrived. We needed your services.

Soon all the base knew you were every day with the new ones. And day after day you soon saw Luke watching on the doorstep. He didn’t talk to you. He trusted you. But he needed to see you.

You could feel his eyes filled with admiration as you set an example. Your students sometimes tried to integrate him, after all he was a jedi, he aroused attention but he stayed behind, for you.

One evening while your disciples were leaving and he was about leaving too, you held him back. He advanced towards you, calm.

"You can’t do that. You tell him as he looked at you intrigued

- Do what?

- Stay here. You may not talk to me, but you’re still there. You were losing patience, he could see it.

- I’m doing the best I can.

- So do more! He saw the anger in your eyes and he kept perfectly calm despite the pain you made him feel. You hated yourself for it.

- I understood what you want to part with." Of course he understood. "But I don’t understand why."

- If you are standing back because you accepted, you do not need to understand. You started to put away the equipment while he followed you at a reasonable distance.

- I don’t accept it. But I can’t force you. I'm just making sure I can keep looking after you. Let you know I’m here."

You sighed as you turned to him. Even knowing that you did not want to love him. That you rejected his love. He had only one thing in mind. Look after you. You felt tears coming up and you saw the worry on his face as he approached you.

You quickly wiped your eyes with your sleeve.

"It’s all right," you said abruptly, stepping back. "I’m fine, now go." He just looked at you for a moment before accepting.

"Okay. But know that I don’t want to lose a second with you. You make me feel alive."

You weren’t looking at his blue eyes for a few seconds but you could feel the feeling of love he had sent into you.

You felt it. He loved you. So hard. Your eyes closed as you heard him go, leaving you alone.

***

It was night. And you couldn’t sleep. Everything turned over and over in your mind, in your body. You wanted to vomit.

Standing up you found yourself sitting on the edge of your bed drinking the largest possible sip of water. You felt dehydrated, your body absorbed everything through your tension.

No one had ever made you feel so much love. And he made you feel his, he loved you as much as you loved him. Why wasn’t he afraid?

Cause you make him feel alive

You got up hastily, your feet on the cold ground you left your room, crossing the corridors with your heavy steps you arrived at his door. And once in front, you got stuck, not daring to touch it until it opened by itself.

"Come in" And that’s what you did. The door closed behind you as he lit his bedside lamp. He hadn’t slept either, it was obvious. He got up and his sleepwear made him even more attractive if it was possible.

"Why aren’t you afraid? You were frantic in the way you asked your question and he started smiling.

- Afraid of what?"

- To love me and then to lose me?

- I’m terrified of it." He said calmly, understanding now what you were afraid of. "But I think the regret of not loving you terrifies me even more." You stared at him, recording what he said to you." And, I am a jedi, I control my fear. He added with a little laugh that made you smile.

- Does that mean that, if I could control the force, I would be a sith?" Did you ask what made him laugh harder. You loved making him laugh. "My joke is not too controversial?" Which made him laugh even more before he looked at you with love.

"You can still choose the good side of the force." And at the end of that sentence he looked at you seriously. He seriously wanted you to do it, he wanted you to love him.. so much.

Face to face you stared at him and you could feel every moments, every words, every feelings going through you and you felt yourself resisting less and less. He was right. You knew. You had to control your fear.

You looked at every aspect of his face. And you couldn’t resist. You wanted him. With all your heart. With all your body.

You rushed to him and put your lips on his as his arms wrapped around your body. His fingers were sinking into your skin.

You clung desperately to him. Too much had been repressed, you needed him, to feel him.

Your hands reached his hair as his passed under the fabric of your nightgown to feel your skin, making you shiver.

"I love you" he manages to say between two kisses that led you breathless. Appreciating what he had just said, you stop for a moment and quickly see the fear in his eyes. Was he going too fast?

You start smiling at him, reassuring him and leaning to give him a tender kiss.

"I love you too"

——————————————————————

Lots of love ❤️

[nikiko-venu]

Spoilers for s1 episode 47-rest of the podcast

I headcannon that after the trial when the timeline swapped Nicholas had the worst fucking headaches, like it was someone trying to break out of a glass box but they couldn't because it was like 50 layers of bullet proof glass and it would not go away. Him being knocked out from the Guards at the prison didn't help either I only made it worse. When his dad and the rest of the group went to talk to the warden, it died down, but when that weed smoking, no good, law breaking, dangerous son of bill close of a man, Glenn showed back up it started hurt even more than last time. Then when they escaped it hurt worse. When he wasn't around Glenn it didn't hurt as bad. But he comes after him with the rest of the dads behind him and it starts back up again, then when we swapped bodies, that was weird. The entire time Glenn was in his dads body and his dad was in Glenn's his brain didn't know who it really was, my headache lessened during that. He won't know why but seeing his dad is Glenn's body felt the wrong kind of right. Something he was sure was false but deep down somewhere behind 50 layers of bullet proof glass it felt true. But then everyone switched back and it started up again, when he got swallowed by the aboleth he was knocked unconscious, he could hardly see it but there was a crack, he could hardly see it but there was a face just like his on the other side, it looked so vastly different, yet the same. He watched as the crack grew larger, and larger, his reflection watched with an excitement, one he didn't know, he was scared, confused, how long had he been there, had there been headache earlier in the adventure, had his mirror always been there, then the glass shattered, he remembers the comforting sound of Glenn voice when he had a rough day, he remembers sitting there with him watching face/off after school. He remembers playing Call Of Duty and prestigeing twice. He remembers he wanted to go into the bull-e-wugs fighting ring not because Glenn said his dad- Jodie wanted him to but that he wanted to impress Glenn. He remembers not remembering the highs he and Glenn have had together. And he remembers being trapped in his own skull wanting to break free and tell his dad that he's not alone. For 18 years glenn was locked away. Alone except for the rat he weirdly named after Nick. He remembered feeling hopelessness when they were locked away by mark. And he remembers the absolute confusion they shared together when they swapped.

And when nick opens his eyes he sees a SHIT TON OF LIGHT and the silhouette of what he knows true to be Glenn, the smell of weed very barely making it past the smell of aboleth stomach acid. The strong burly left arm, the stench of being locked up for 18 years with no shower.

Almost like it is natural instinct nick says

"I'm ready..."

"READY FOR THE BIG RIDE BABY!"

[tealeavesandthorns]

//On the way to my second day.

And although it's a LOT, the reason I wanted to get back to work badly was because it helps feed my creative brain. It's like whilst my main brain is bothering about the work stuff my creative brain gets to get all fired up and ready.

But it is a lot and exhausting and a lot of information. Today will probably be the worst day because its a team day or something and for me that means basically a full day of unconsciously mirroring and masking to blend in like a chameleon, whilst also trying to remember what is appropriate conversation and what is not:

Serial killers and fun facts about them not so much

The new series of it's always sunny.... maybe

The American Office always seems a safe zone 🤣🤣

[worldwithoutmiracles]

ADHD Coping Strategies

these are the things that have actually genuinely worked for me. I’m not guaranteeing they will work for you (I hope they do!) but I am guaranteeing I will not put “buy a planner” on this list.

okay, I know I said no planner talk, but I am religious about my phone calendar app. I put everything in there the second it occurs to me - appointments, sure, but also vague things like “call Grandma” or “post office?”. seeing it on a calendar instead of a list works better for my brain. whenever something I need to take care of within x amount of time occurs to me, it gets written down. I have stopped mid-sentence to pull out my phone and schedule “shower” for the next day (can you believe it took 28 years to get diagnosed lol). the key is not what tool you use, it’s finding one that is convenient, and then not being ashamed to use it (and never telling yourself “oh, I’ll remember without writing it down”)

let one task bleed into another, and try to separate your body from your brain. this one is huge for me, and might be tough to describe. basically, when I am avoiding a task and stuck in a phone scroll loop, I cannot get my brain to switch from Task A to Task B - it just won’t happen. so I try to bypass the switch altogether. I try not to consciously think of “starting” anything, and I bring Task A with me as I move a little. so, I’m sitting around rewatching a YouTube video, avoiding a shower (you know the mood). without thinking about the shower, I will continue to watch YouTube, but just stand up. basically, I don’t tell myself “okay, I’m stopping now” and “okay, time to start!” I just sort of...blend the two together. ease the transition. I’m still scrolling through twitter, but I move from the couch to the floor to prepare to work out. the TV show is on and I’m still watching as I move toward the kitchen. without me noticing, Task B has started, and with the worst behind me, I can finish doing it. (I can also sometimes just make my body do things physically without engaging my mind, but this might be an acquired skill and doesn’t work every day. mentally, I’m still in bed, but physically I’m now standing in the bathroom, huh weird, better start getting ready for the day.)

care about how you feel as much as you care about what you do. due to low self-esteem, I seem to think it’s okay for me to spend literal DAYS in agony because I can’t do a 15 minute task. when you think about it, it’s such a cruel and narrow way to live. why am I okay with feeling afraid and guilty all day, but I’m not okay with just giving myself permission to put this task off until tomorrow (or even just sitting down and doing it now, so I can feel happy and proud for the rest of the day)? why do I see my life as just an endless series of to-do lists instead of an experience to be lived with joy and by my own values?

separate moral judgements from your actions. this is a HUGE thing that came up for me in therapy. I am always judging myself as a good or bad person based on, like, productivity and my to-do list? which is so stupid. and I know, consciously, it is stupid. but I also, unconsciously, think about myself in these terms ALL THE TIME. my therapist started pointing out every time I used “should” or “supposed to” when I spoke, and it was almost every sentence. I’m always acting like I’m performing for some moral authority, like I’m being graded (burnt out gifted kids who were raised Catholic say ‘heyyy’). you are a good person. you need to find a way to make yourself believe that without an outside authority.

subdivide the day into smaller chunks. if I meant to get out of bed and run errands at 8 AM, and it’s now 1 PM and I’m stuck in a shame spiral and haven’t left my bed, it’s easy for me to just write the day off as fucked and give up. it’s really, really powerful if you can stop measuring time in units as large as a day. generally, I like to think of the day as split up into 4 segments. now, if I waste the morning and afternoon, that’s okay! I can turn the day around now and decide to make the 3rd or 4th part of the day better. shower at 3 PM and put on clean clothes like you just woke up. run errands at 7 PM if the store is still open. write the email at 2 AM (and schedule it to be sent at a normal time - shhh night email is my little secret). just begin again. you can always begin again, any time.

please, for the love of god, find ways to be nice to yourself, to consider the best possible scenario, to forgive yourself, to believe, truly, that you don’t deserve to be sad and scared and stressed all of the time. your life should not be something you feel you are avoiding or missing out on. please imagine a better life for yourself, and take the time to remind yourself that you deserve goodness and kindness and grace, especially from yourself. be gentle.

medication and therapy. I know this isn’t feasible for a lot of people - I couldn’t afford it for a decade. but if you have the means and have just been putting it off because “it’s not that bad”, please go. I thought I was doing “fine” because I had been worse. meanwhile, I had stopped even imagining my life could be better. turns out my “fine” was leagues below where I deserved to be and how I could feel about myself.

becoming aware of the way I think about myself has been such a powerful tool for managing my symptoms over the last few years. it often feels like my lack of productivity makes me feel bad, but the reality is my symptoms worsen when I already have something I feel fearful, anxious, or ashamed of, so thinking about the way I think has helped me tremendously.

sorry I can only write long posts. 

[spiderman-4]

Get up ~ please

Summary: Tho always gets back up, no matter how hard he’s hit you can always count on Theo to get back up and keep fighting. This time he didn’t.

••

Liam almost didn’t see Theo get hit because he was so busy fighting for his own life that he was unaware of the battles happening around him. It was a rough pack that wanted Scott’s power. Power thirsty wolves who would kill anyone to get the power they so desperately craved. Liam, Theo, Scott, and Malia had found the pack in the woods and got ambushed.

Theo and Liam were separated from Scott and Malia by a few hundred feet; the pack and split in two and Theo and Liam and chased after them to insure they couldn’t get away.

Liam was so used to Theo never getting hurt or showing any sign of injury that whenever they fought he almost forgot that Theo could actually get hurt in a seriously way. They were friends, at least that’s what Liam thought, Theo was alway pretty closed off about things and never really specified how he viewed Liam but he was always there whenever Liam needed him, sometimes he was there more than Scott. It was almost as if Theo dropped everything when Liam called, didn’t even make him wait till he finished what he was doing he would just leave. Liam never let himself think to much into it, dreading the butterflies in his stomach when he did.

So when Liam had finished with the last of the wolves he was fighting and turned to Theo, he froze. He would have never imagined something like this. Theo was down, he was on the ground and a wolf was kneeling over him his hand in the air ready to claw at Theo’s neck.

An involuntary roar escaped Liam’s throat as his body finally unfroze and his brain had a split second to process the situation. The wolfs eyes shot up to meet Liam’s and Liam quickly lunged at the man. He was thrown to the ground and Liam threw himself at the wolf. Hitting and punching and clawing, as much at he “hated” it, Theo had become his anchor and helped him through his worst situations. Seeing Theo in such a vulnerable position made something snap in him and all his rang as come bubbling to the surface.

Liam snapped out of his trance when he heard a small whine. Even unconscious, Theo still stopped Liam from loosing control. “Theo?” Liam questioned softly as he raised himself from the ground and took a step towards the body.

When he got to Theo sit he lowered himself to his knees, his hands hovering over Theo’s body, unsure on what to do. Theo’s stomach had been slashed multiple ways and his face had been scratched up so much it was hard to see his eyes. The scratches continued all over his body and Liam began panicking because he wasn’t healing.

Liam grabbed at Theo’s shoulder and shook him, “Theo! Come on wake up please, don’t be dead because that’s not fair. You promised that you’d finally play video games with me this weekend. This is a cowardly cop out you know” Liam choked on his words as Theo’s heartbeat continued to slow. “Okay okay okay, you’re going to be an Alpha Liam. What would Scott do?” Liam couldn’t focus. He was to busy listening to Theo’s heartbeat and his breathing to focus on how to wake him up.

Liam lifted his trembling hands and grabbed Theo’s face. He focused his brain the best he could and squeezed his eyes shut until he felt the numbing pain in his abdomen. His eyes shot open and he almost cheered when he saw the black veins crawling up his arm. Liam hadn’t had the most success at taking peoples pain (also something Theo was helping with) but now he was doing it without any help.

It felt weird and the pain filling his body made him cringe but the look on Theo’s face slowly softened and his breathing began to pick up. “Theo. Please wake up man. Come on. You can’t die, i- you’re supposed to help me when Scott is gone. You need to teach me stuff and make sure I keep my anger in check. Theo you’re my anchor and I’ve already watched one of my anchors die and I c-can’t do it again so. Wake up!” Liam last words sounded more like a roar then him really speaking but Theo’s eyes shot up and his hands came up to clutch at Liam’s wrists and arms. He was gasping for breath and looking all around him. The wounds on his face were beginning to close themselves together.

Liam almost sobbed when Theo woke up. “Theo. Theo stop, it’s okay. You’re okay. I’m okay, they are all taken care of okay” Liam had forced Theo’s eyes to meet his, Theo’s eyes were wide and confused but as Liam spoke his eyes softened, his hands were still gripped on Liam wrist. Liam slowly lowered his hands from Theo’s face and Theo’s hands retracted to pull at his shirt to see the damage of his now healing wounds.

“I thought you were dead” Liam almost whimpered out and Theo’s eyes shot out to meet his. “There was this guys standing over you ready to slash your fucking neck I- I didn’t know- I got him off you before he could do more damage-” Theo cut Liam’s rambling short.

“Did you kill him?” Theo’s question was hesitant, almost like he didn’t want to know the answer.

Liam felt his face flush “N-no. You made this sound while you were unconscious and I- uh I snapped out of it. You weren’t healing, I know your healing is slower than mine but you just like wouldn’t heal and I just I tried to wake you up but you wouldn’t get up and you always get up like always and I never really think about you getting hurt because it doesn’t happen and I was just- I couldn’t think about being able to walk out of these woods without you and I-”

“LIAM” both Theo and Liam’s heads shot to the trees where Scott and Malia walked out. They cloths torn and bloody. Malias face had a large gash down it that was healing slowly.

“What happened to your face?” She snapped at Theo, a grossed out look on her face as she walked towards the two boys in the ground.

“What happened to yours” Theo shot back but didn’t wait for an answer as he slowly tried to get himself off the ground. Liam went to help but a dark and cold glance from Theo made him stop and just stand up in his own.

“Theo? What’s happened?” Scott questioned as he took in the shape of Theo. Hidden bathing his eyes was worry but all Theo could see was pity.

“Nothing serious-“ Liam cut him off

“He almost died, like heart basically stopped kind of dead and I want him to go to Deatons. Liam didn’t look at Theo but he could feel the death glare that was being sent into the side of his head right now.

“I don’t need to go anywhere I’m fine let’s just finish up here and go on with life” The sarcasm that was think in Theo’s voice made Liam roll his eyes.

“Liam’s in charge here now Theo so if he say’s you’re going to the clinic then you’re going. Don’t fight us on this okay. You heal slow you need to proper rest not just the back seat of your car” scott noticed the almost instant change in Theo’s posture, he went still and eyes widened. He had known that Scott knew about his sleeping arrangements, why was he so shocked.

Liam on the other hand was completely unaware of Theo sleeping arrangements and turned to him with wide eyes and an slightly open mouth. He looked like he was about to say something so Theo beat him to it “Okay! Deatons it is”

••

Liam was quiet. The entire time Theo was being checked my Deaton, Liam at there in a chair and looked at his hands, sometimes checking his phone and replying to his mom about where he was. Not once did he speak to anyone.

It was only when Deaton left the room to go and check some stuff after giving Theo the all clear didn’t Liam look up. Deaton had given Theo a rag to wash his face and Theo was about to push himself off the table when Liam finally spoke.

“Don’t” Theo froze, the anxiety running through him was unbearable. He knew Liam was going to bring up his truck he just didn’t know when. “Don’t get up and move around, you’re still healing” Liam’s voice was solid as he rounded the table and snatched the cloth from Theo’s hand and ran it under warm water.

When he turned back towards Theo he let his eyes travel over the other boys body. His shirt was removed and his pants traded in for some of Scott’s old lacrosse shirts that had been left in the clinic. His body was covered in dried blood and some still closing wounds. Theo went to reach out for the cloth and wipe himself down when Liam jerked his hand away.

“Let me do it” Theo shook his head and went to grab the cloth again “please” Liam voice sounded scratchy and weak, almost like he was pleading with Theo. Theo locked eyes with the beta and the look of exhaustion and doubt made him weak, he could never say ‘no’ to Liam and it was going to be his downfall.

“Okay” Theo whispered, his voice was hushed and hesitant. “Go for it pup” he almost saw missed the small smile that crossed Liam’s face at the nickname.

“I told you to stop calling me that” Liam fronted his smile and small blush as he grabbed Theo’s arm and began wiping the dried blood from his tanned skin.

“You love it” Theo smirked as he watched Liam work, the grip Liam had on his wrist was feather light as he slowly ran the cloth down his arm, starting at the shoulder. The two boys never really touched each other unless it was throwing punches. Although there was that one time that Liam had almost killed a hunter because he had hurt Mason and Theo had to physically restrain the beta. Liam was screaming obscenities at Theo and punching his chest to break free but eventually had collapsed into Theo’s hood and just cried at the thought of losing his best friend.

They didn’t talk about that time though.

“Theo-“ Liam’s voiced cracked softly so he cut his own sentence off. Theo examined his face and watched he fought with himself about his question.

“What is it Liam?” Theo pushed, he would usually give Liam the time he needed to get his words out but he wanted the lecture to be over and done with quickly, he was tired and he just wanted to sleep.

“I want you to stay with me tonight” Liam had finished Theo’s right arm and set the rag down, meeting Theo’s wide eyes. “Before! You say no, just uh- just hear me out. I- uh- I scared myself tonight. When I saw that guys standing over you. I almost killed him. I don’t want to kill people Theo and when you’re around I don’t feel like I’m going to accidentally kill people. You ground me, make me feel like I have control over my anger. You’re my anchor and I know we like fight all the time but I just-“

“Okay”

“I want you to just thin- Wait! Okay?!?! You’re going to agree just like that with no other pushing?” Liam looked at Theo with a bewildered expression that made Theo smile, a genuine smile that made Liam a little bit weak in the knees.

“If me being there will help, then I’m there” Theo’s tone was serious and it made Liam smile a giant smile as he turned back around to wash the cloth off. He didn’t want to push Theo sleeping in his truck tonight because he felt it would start an unnecessary argument that their of them had the energy for tonight. Tomorrow though, was another story.

Liam walked back over and began working on Theo’s left arm with the same feather like grip on his wrist as he worked. “Thank you.” Liam eyes glanced up at Theo’s and then back at his arm in a way of telling him to continue. “You saved my life. I didn’t say thank you. Thank you Liam” Theo’s voice got really quiet at the last thank you, if Liam didn’t have super hearing he probably would have missed it completely.

“You’ve saved my ass a whole bunch of time so I had to pay you back somehow. Besides, you’re my anchor remember. Can’t have you dying on me” Liam chucked and went to rise the cloth once again.

When he came back, he hesitated. He was going to wipe down Theo’s chest but he didn’t know if it was appropriate considering this was the closet they’ve ever been.

“I can do it puppy. You don’t need to” Theo met Liam’s eyes when he saw his hesitation but Liam shoot his head.

“No. You’re supposed to be resting so just let me do this” he sounded almost frustrated. Like it was his fault for Theo’s now fully healed injuries.

“Okay” Theo whispered and Liam began wiping down Theo’s chest, his eyes stayed focused on Theo’s strongly build chest. Liam felt his face heating up as he ran the cloth over Theo’s abs. He could feel Theo looking at him as he worked. Subconsciously Liam let his unused hand fall to rest in Theo thigh. He froze for a moment, expecting Theo to shove him off but when he didn’t react at all he continued to clean Theo’s chest.

When Liam was done he wouldn’t even look Theo in the eye as he turned to rise the cloth out. Scared for Theo to see the blush coating his face. “I can smell you Liam” Theo admitted and Liam froze. Shit. He forgot to mast his chemosignals and Theo could smell just how nervous he was, and just how much it affected he was from being able to feel up Theo’s chest.

“Shut up” Liam muttered and walked back over to Theo with the warm cloth. “Just shut up” Liam whispered before reaching up with the cloth and gently rubbing down Theo’s cheek, died blood coming off with the rag.

Liam wouldn’t meet Theo’s eyes as he continued to wipe Theo’s face clean of blood. His face was bright read and his blush was sneaking down his neck and he felt Theo’s gaze on his face.

“You don’t have to be embarrassed pup. I know I’m very attractive. You don’t have to hide the way you feel” Theo whispered, his voice was rough and low as he spoke. Liam’s hand gently grabbed the side of Theo’s face, steadying his face so he could clean it.

“Yes I do” Liam’s voice was quiet and sounded almost disappointed by the realization that his feelings for Theo wouldn’t be returned.

“Why?” This time, Theo reached out. He was tired of just looking at the side of Liam’s face. His fingers lifted Liam’s chin and forced their eyes to meet. Liam’s eyes widened and his heart began beating out of his chest at the touch.

“You don’t see me the way I see you” Liam muttered, shame evident in his voice as his eyes struggled to keep Theo’s gaze.

Liam’s eyes were filled with vulnerability and self consciousness. As the words left Liam’s mouths Theo’s eyes softened and Liam let out a sigh at the soft eyes that he had grown accustomed to.

“And how exactly do you see me Liam?” Theo asked, he knew how Liam saw him, of course he didn’t but it was believing it that was different for Theo. Why would Liam want someone like him when he could have anyone he wanted.

Liam body had a tendency to work quicker than his brain and today it was no different. Without even thinking Liam pressed his lips to Theo’s. Theo doesn’t have time to return the kiss before Liam pulled away and tried to leave the room, muttering obscenities to himself.

Theo jumped off the table and wrapped an arm around his waist, effectively turning Liam around and this time Theo pressed his lips against Liam’s. Liam let out a noise of surprise but melted into the kiss, his hands resting against Theo’s chest as Theo’s arms stayed wrapped around his waist.

“You’re so incredibly stupid Liam. How could I not see you the same way. It’s you Liam. Fuck it’s always been you” Theo’s eyes remained closed at he rested his forehead against Liam’s

“So-” Liam grabbed Theo’s face in his hands “Does this mean, we’re like boyfriends?” Liam’s voice was still filled with nerves as if Theo hadn’t quite literally kissed him.

“Yes Liam. We’re boyfriends”

[iwadori]

Hiiii!!!! can you do like when you guys are supposed to meet up and they waited for about an hour or so and kept texting you you but you haven't replied so they thought you ditched them and got mad at you and stuff then they decided to go home and while on their way home not too far from their school they found you unconscious body with a large wound on you back and your head bleeding?.

can you pleaseease do tsukishima, yamaguchi, ushijima, bokuto (I'm sorry if that's a lot)

Haikyu Boys when you get hurt Pt 2 (Ushijima,Bokuto

Part One Part Two Part Three

Word count: 2.6K

Genre: angst, fluff

masterlist

Ushijima

You were having the worst week this week,  from battling a cold and your boss making you do all sorts of extra jobs (that were definitely not under your job description.) As easter was swiftly approaching you and Ushijima had your annual plans of going to the local kids community center and helping them with an easter egg hunt. But you don’t think you can manage it this year.

Ushijima gets home from practice with 4 bags just filled with easter eggs ranging from all different sizes, “woah there Toshi, you’ve got enough there too feed all of england” you laugh  

“I don’t think these eggs will be able to sustain England Y/N” he says seriously making you laugh even harder. As you were laughing, you felt another migraine come along making your cringe in pain. “Toshi, I don’t think I can do the easter egg hunt this year?”  

He sits down next to you alarmed that something is wrong, “why what happened Y/N” he asks

“I’ve been feeling terrible all week, and I even have a migraine right now” you say to him thinking he would understand.

“That’s it?” he questions thinking what you said was a joke “I think you can handle a migraine, remember we’re doing this for the kids”

His words were making you feel slightly guilty since maybe you were being over dramatic. “Y/N if it’s really ‘that bad’, i’ll make you some tea so you can feel better,” he says going into the kitchen to start on your tea. You murmur a quiet “thank you” and you end up falling asleep, hoping that by the time you wake up your head stops pounding.

As you wake up, you realise you slept all the way through the night and over to the next day as when you look at your clock it says 12:32 pm. You look at your nightstand and saw that Ushijima wrote you a note saying:  

Y/N I've left out early to set out the easter egg hunt, I’ve made you breakfast so eat up and get prepared for the event which starts at 4pm. Please don’t forget.

Sincerely – Ushijima Wakatoshi.

You chuckle at the fondness of the note, before realising your pain. Your brain felt like it was having a live concert inside that definitely was not going to end soon but you still got up prepared for the day. You didn’t want to let Ushijima or the kids down.  

When you go to the kitchen , you see the cute breakfast that Ushijima made you consisting of all of your favourite foods and with another simple note of him saying ‘ I love you. ‘ Ushijima has always been a lovely boyfriend, treating you like the queen you are always making sure that you were okay. Of course, his bluntness and his lack of social cues was something to get used to but when you did get accustomed to it, it only made you fall in love with him more.

You got ready, feeling even more sick as the piping hot shower that you usual have, did not help as when you were showering you felt heavily faint. However, you persevered since you did not want to let Ushijima down.

You finally were prepared to leave the house, with the community center being on 15 minutes walk away you were leaving out at 3:50pm since you were planning to take your car anyways. When you leave your home, you realise that you forgot your car keys so you dash up the stairs (a bit too quickly) to go and find them. Scrambling through your draws, your head is pounding harder and harder and the more it pounds the quicker your moving making you even more faint. You eventually find your keys and you’re ready to zoom to the community center but your body gave out and you pass out tumbling down the stairs landing at your front door.

Ushijima was waiting outside of the community center waiting for you to arrive it was 4:05pm and he was wondering where you were (knowing that your place was only a 10 minute drive away) he sent you a few texts asking where you were but when you don’t respond Ushijima becomes slightly annoyed, plastering a fake smile on his face and entering the community center, starting the easter egg hunt.

The easter egg hunt came to a close at 8pm and Ushijima assumed that you would’ve showed up some time in the middle of the event, but you obviously didn’t show. After making sure that all the kids left safely Ushijima decided to call and text you more and when you continuously don’t respond and your calls go to voicemail he says ‘Y/N, im really disappointed with you right now. How could you do this to me? You said you would show up, the kids were really upset, how could you be so selfish?’

He walks to your house knocking on the door, but when you don’t immediately answer he knew something must be up now, since you haven’t responded to any of his texts and calls and didn’t show up he figured there was something deeper then you just ditching the event.

He used his key to open the door, surprised when the door hit something. He tried again hitting the ‘object’ that was laying at the door again. He carefully pushes the door to make enough room for him to fit through the gap. When he entered, he was startled at the sight of you, there you lay completely knocked out with a blood stain next to your head. He knelt down next to you and touched your cheek you were extremely cold, he had to get you to a hospital stat. He called an ambulance, panicked. Worrying about how long you’ve been out for since it would have to be atleast more than 4 hours he assumed.

You woke up in a foreign room, with your head slightly stinging. You place your hand on the back of your head and wince, then you remember you need to be at the easter egg hunt so you bolt up ready to move.  

“I don’t think that’s wise for you to do that Y/N” Ushijima says to you  

“Toshi, what happened?” you ask still in pain

“It seems you fell down the stairs and hit your head” after he said that all your memories come flooding back, and you remember rushing to the community centre, looking for your keys, and then falling down the stairs and everything going black.

“I’m sorry Ushi for missing the easter egg hunt, I really tried to get there,” you say with an apologetic look on your face  

“It’s fine Y/N of course you wouldn’t of been able to get there after falling down the stairs” he says “Also, this is proof of why you shouldn’t run down the stairs”

You eventually get discharged with the doctor telling you all you need to do is rest and stay off your feet. Ushijima took the doctor's orders very seriously, becoming your loyal servant and waiting on you hand and foot, tending to your every need. He did also make you were eating healthy and taking all your medicine so you could have the best recovery possible.  

Also, after realising that this could’ve all been avoided if Ushijima didn’t guilt trip you in the first place for having a migraine, he made sure to never ignore or dismiss when you say you are ill or have anything wrong with you even if it’s a migraine, a lost limb or a simple paper cut.

Bokuto  

The Olympics were coming up and Bokuto couldn’t be any more excited than he already was. Everything he’s talked about for the past month he manages to find a way to relate to the Olympics, and as annoying as it got sometimes you were just as excited for it as much as Bokuto was.  

Bokuto was heavily busy with extra practices so you were bored and lonely, since your boyfriend was at practice all the time so you chose to take up a new hobby. You decided to paint, although you weren’t an award-winning painter you still found joy in it. Being Bokuto’s girlfriend you had some slight unwanted attention on you: the usual fans of Bokuto that just followed you to have an extra aspect of him in their life's, or his fangirls that adored him.  

You didn’t mind the fangirls for the most part since majority of them were pretty tamed and did fawn over your relationship. However, there was the minority of fans that did make it known to you that they DID NOT like you at all. When you started posting your paintings, it seems their hate for you amplified since they always found the need to leave an astray of mean comments on your post. But that didn’t mainly bother you since you thought that they only had that energy behind the screen.

The days went by getting closer to the Olympics, with Bokuto always asking you every day “Y/N you are coming to my games, right?” to which you always replied “Of course Kou, I’m coming” which always made him smile.

When the Olympics came, you’ve went to all the games cheering Bokuto and the team on as they were winning round after round. Whilst this was going on, the group of girls that were sending you horrible messages and making mean posts about you weren’t stopping. At first, you didn’t care for them but it seems their posts only gotten worse making comments about your artwork, your face, your body type ect.  

You didn’t want to tell Bokuto as you felt that it would ruin his Olympic momentum and you thought you could handle it all on your own.  

It was nearing to the final game of the Olympics, and Bokuto was ecstatic he made sure that you promised you’d be there claiming that you was his ‘good luck’ charm.’ You were excited to go too, the feeling of watching Bokuto play was exhilarating seeing him fully in his element was great for you to see.

On the last game day, Boktuo was already at the stadium since him and the team had to be there earlier to practice and you planned to meet him there just before the game started at 4:30. You went to a florist before the match getting Bokuto the biggest boquet that you could buy.  

On your way to the stadium you here somebody whistle from behind you, you turn around and see a group of girls waiting behind you smirking. “Hi?” you say more like a question then a statement “do you want something from me?”

Some of them laugh, but the one standing at the front who you mentally lable the ‘main one’ steps closer to you and says “We want you to stay away from Bokuto” you realise that these were the girls sending you hate online for these past weeks.

Before you can even blink, the girls jump you, hitting, kicking and clawing at you. You are in pain, screaming and crying for them to stop and leave you alone. You lay there, letting them beat you up thinking that you’ll probably end up dead out of this. All you can think about is Bokuto, you didn’t get to wish him good luck, or give him your flowers (that you spent a fortune on) or even tell him that you loved him one last time.

You think the girls eventually stopped but you couldn’t tell because your body was throbbing and you hurt all over. You tried to get up still wanting to go to the match but you collapse going out cold.

Bokuto was scanning the crowd over and over for you, hoping to spot you there. But he couldn’t, he was wondering where you were getting sadder and sadder by the second since he really believed you were his good luck charm and he probably wouldn’t be able to win without at least seeing your face once.

They didn’t win. Bokuto knew he wasn’t playing at his best, since all his mind was on was thinking about where you were. You’ve never missed one of his games, so he was incredibly worried. After he accepted his second-place medal, he rushed out the stadium to go to your house but he was stopped by some fangirls ‘I guess signing autographs is the least I can do’ he thinks, the fans were being a bit odd today but he didn’t have time to focus on that as his mind was racing thinking about you and your whereabouts.  

One of his fans did give him an alarmingly big boquet of roses which he appreciated ‘these must of cost a fortune’ he thinks. Although it was a probably a long shot, he decided to ask the fan if he saw someone who looked like *whatever you look like* to maybe see if someone else saw you. Which the fan replied “yeah I saw them with some guy at this restaurant whilst we were going to see you!” they exclaimed.

‘A guy’ he thought ‘that most likely wasn’t you.’ Seeing Bokuto’s confusion, the fan followed up with “I'm pretty sure it was her I mean we all know who Bokuto Koutaro’s girlfriend was.” Bokuto didn’t reply just walking away making sure to thank them for the flowers.  

He was rushing towards your house on foot (since all the taxi’s and ubers were fully booked because of the Olympics) whilst running he stumbles across your passed out body all black and bruised with scratch marks and bleeding all over you. “what happened” he whispered, knowing you obviously weren’t going to respond.  

He picked up your near-dead body, and cradled you in his arms taking you back to the stadium (since he knew that getting an ambulance to come here or running to the hospital would basically be impossible.) When he got back to the stadium, he did get odd looks from strangers but he didn’t care, his only agenda was making sure you were okay.

You woke up, and saw Bokuto pacing the room repeatedly you tried to get his attention by saying his name but your throat was damaged. He eventually notices you and runs to your side, stroking your face softly and giving you a gentle hug making sure not to hurt you.  

“Who did this Y/N?” he asks with worry in his eyes  

You ignore his question and look at the silver medal wrapped around his neck making you sad “I’m sorry I didn’t make it to the match, I tried I really did try” you said with your voice sounding even worse after you said every word.  

“Don’t be silly, I’m just glad that you’re okay babe, I was really worried about you.” he said

The Medic came in and said that you had multiple broken ribs, but beside that you were fine you just needed to rest your throat and let your bruises heal. You eventually told Bokuto that it was some of his fans, he was upset that you hid this from him for so long but he was just glad that he got to you as soon as he did. He managed to play at the next Olympics and you were there fully present, with your even bigger boquet of flowers watching win gold.

Authors Note: I tried to make it as close to your request as possible, but I hope you enjoy as I really do think this is my favourite work so far.... :3 Comments and feedback appreciated.

[kaunis-sielu]

Fire Dogs: 3

When you get home Sam is asleep on the couch and Cooper is waiting at the door.

“Sam,” Steve says and Sam wakes with a start, alert and ready to go, “Go to bed. We got her.” Sam shakes his head then stands and stretches.

“You alright Fawn?”

“I will be, just a bit bruised.” You give him a small smile and he returns it then heads upstairs.

“Glad you’re okay.” He says before he disappears down the hallway.

“Thanks Sam!” You call then Steve’s hand brushes the back of your arm.

“Let’s get a look at your ribs and shoulder.” He suggests you can feel the flicker of an Alpha command but it’s like he’s aware of it so he makes sure he makes it a suggestion.

“You don’t want to shower first?”

“Not really if that’s alright with you. I’d rather make sure you’re okay.”

“Alright, what first?”

“Ribs. Cuz Buck didn’t check.” You sigh softly before taking the edge of your shirt in your hands. You take a deep breath, do your best to hide the wince, then lift the shirt to just under your bra. Steve lets out a low whistle, “Oh Honey.” He breathes and you can’t help but notice that’s the second time he’s called you that. “That’s gotta hurt. I’m gonna put some pressure on a few different places okay? I want you to give me a scale of one to ten, ten being the worst, how bad it hurts.”

“Okay.” He gently feels your ribs, the highest he gets on the pain scale is a six.

“I’m fairly confident none are broken but if the pain escalates you let one of us know immediately okay?”

“I will.”

“Good girl,” he mutters before reaching for the blanket you keep on the couch, “Shoulder now, it’ll probably be easier to take your shirt off and wrap yourself in the blanket.” He turns away and you go to peel yourself out of your shirt but it hurts like hell to try and get it off.

“Steve I can’t.” You grumble finally admitting defeat.

“Can’t?”

“I can’t get my shirt off without hurting myself. I need help.”

“Oh, okay.” He turns around and helps ease you out of your tee shirt, thankfully it’s not terribly painful but it is a little awkward to be standing in front of him in just your bra and shorts. “Blanket?” He offers you your blanket again.

“Thanks.” He nods, when you wince again as you attempt to wrap the blanket around you he frowns slightly. Again Steve takes the blanket from your hands and wraps it around you. He’s so close to you that you can smell the smoke on him stronger than his scent.

“Ready?”

“I guess. Same pain scale?” He nods then gently starts to touch around your already bruising shoulder. He gets a seven and a half on this one, right where the branch had hit you.

“How does the head feel?”

“I mean I have a headache, and I’m pretty sure I was unconscious for a while but for having a branch fall on me I’m doing alright.”

“I would really like it if you went to the ER.” He says gently, “You want help getting your shirt back on?”

“No, I’m just going to put on my pajamas and ice my shoulder.”

“You sure you don’t want to go to the hospital?”

“Do you honestly think that I need to? Bucky said I didn’t have a concussion. He said I was fine.”

“You went unconscious though. Something you failed to mention.” He frowns down at you, you smile sweetly up at him.

“I’m pretty sure I did.”

“Fawn.” Steve groans dropping his head back in frustration. You bite your lip, you really just, you don’t want to go. His eyes meet yours again and after he searches your face for a second his face softens. “What is it that you’re not telling me?”

“Nothing, it’s nothing.” You lie as you turn to go upstairs but a sudden gentle tug on the back of your blanket pulls you to a stop.

“Honey, I can practically taste the anxiety on you.” He says softly, “are you scared?” You shake your head no, “is it the cost?” Again a no, “Please, let me help?” He soothes, his scent rolls over you and you can feel yourself relaxing.

“I’m,” you drop your head, “it’s my ex. He runs the ER and even if he isn’t there he usually shows up while I’m there.” You admit softly.

“You don’t have to go alone, I’ll stay with you.”

“They’ll ask you to leave. My friend Scott tried that when I broke my wrist.”

“The only one who will get me to leave is you. I promise.”

“Fine,” you relent, “Can you help me get my shirt back on?”

Steve helps you get your shirt back on then you convince him to take a shower. You can wait, you ice your shoulder while he’s in the shower. He comes down in a pair of jeans, a blue plaid shirt that’s rolled up to the elbows and a pair of black boots. Good lord he’s handsome, you grab your purse and Cooper’s leash then follow Steve out the door. Cooper hops in the back and you buckle him in then go to the front seat. When you pull up to the hospital Cooper shoves his head under your arm and you absentmindedly pet him.

“You ready Honey?” You like this new nickname he’s got for you. “Let me know if I can help soothe you okay?” You nod then take a deep breath and pop open your door. You take Cooper out of the back of then meet Steve at the back of the car. When you pause again Steve offers you his hand, when you look up at him he’s got that soft smile on his face again. You take the hand that he offers then head inside, his thumb brushes against your pulse point a couple times and you slow your breathing. It’s not until you’re in a room that you actually start to relax a little bit, but it’s not enough and Coop notices placing his head in your lap.

There’s a tap on your door and before you can say anything the door swings open,

“Well, well, well what did we do this time Grey?” His scent rolls into the room with him, it’s stale and causes your nose to wrinkle.

“She prefers Fawn.” Steve growls and Grant actually looks surprised.

“Who are you?” He asks puffing up his chest at the sight of a new Alpha.

“Captain Steve Rogers.”

“Oh, a firefighter. Thought you liked your men with a bit more brains then a firefighter. I’ll need you to step out Mr. Rogers.”

“No.” Steve says from where he’s leaning coolly against the wall. Cooper licks your fingers.

“Then at least be useful and get that dog out of my way.” Grant sneers taking a step toward you and Steve pops off of the wall,

“Fawn, do you want him to be your doctor?”

“No.”

“You heard the lady. She wants a different doctor. Get out.”

“You might think that you’re some big bad firefighter dude but you don’t get to boss me around.” Grant says standing to his full height, “I’m starting to think that my patient isn’t safe with you around.” Grant sneers and Cooper growls lowly, placing himself between you and Grant, something Steve absolutely notices.

“She’s not the one in danger from me.” You can feel the rage building between the two Alphas and Grant glares at him. “Unless Fawn says otherwise, both the dog and I are staying where we’re at.”

“You don’t get to threaten me in my own hospital.” Grant huffs, “Get. Out.” He punctuates each word with the jab of his finger into Steve’s chest. Steve sighs and when Grant goes to poke him again Steve catches his arm and twists it behind Grant’s back. “This is assault! Security!” He yells and Steve growls lowly.

“Technically you laid hands on me first so this is self-defense. Now, I’m going to politely ask you to get the fuck out and get Fawn another doctor. I’m also going to tell you that if you decide to try and make trouble for me or Fawn one of my best friends is Virginia Potts, New York Attorney General. She really likes knocking bullying Alphas off their pedestal, and the last doctor that went up against her lost his practice license and I think is still serving jail time.” You stare at Steve in amazement, he’s calm, but you can feel the Alpha rolling off of him and still has a firm grasp on Grant. He mutters something quietly to Grant that you can’t hear then Grant looks almost dazed, like Steve had just Alpha commanded him and he didn’t know what to do. Two security guards show up and thankfully one is someone who will actually believe you over Grant.

“Phil!” You breathe in relief.

“Fawn, what is going on here?”

“This is Steve, he’s one of the firefighters staying with me. Grant wouldn’t leave and let me have a different doctor even though I asked for a new one then he poked Steve in the chest and threatened him.”

“I did not! Get this fucker off me!” Grant snaps glaring over at you. “You’re a lying bitch of an Omega Grey.”

“I’m sorry, did I not make it clear you weren’t to call her that anymore?” Steve growls putting pressure on the arm he has behind Grant’s back. “Apologize.”

“Sorry.” Grant spits out and he almost looks surprised that he’s done it. It’s great to see him being bossed around like he used to do to you.

“Continue Fawn.” Phil says calmly, as he eyes the two Alphas in front of him.

“I asked Steve to stay, no matter what, and Grant told him to leave that’s when he poked Steve and threatened him after Steve defended himself.”

“Sir, please let go of Dr. Ward.” Phil says sounding bored, his partner a young woman, seems to be enjoying the drama. Steve let’s go of Grant who turns on Steve and takes a swing at him. One that Steve must have anticipated because he just takes a half step back and the hit goes wide. Both Phil and his partner grab Grant before he can try again and usher him out of your room. “I’ll send in May.” Phil says as they practically drag Grant away.

“Thank you.” You say quietly then Steve gently closes the door.

“I see now why you were so hesitant about coming.” Steve says before sitting down next to you in the second chair, he offers you a hand again and you take it, Coop’s head is back in your lap. “He was abusive wasn’t he?” No one has ever just straight up asked you that.

“Not physically,” you admit, “he’s the one that started the whole Grey nickname and all his friends just kinda ran with it.”

“Abuse isn’t just physical Honey. He Alpha commanded you a lot didn’t he?” You nod slowly before saying,

“I know abuse isn’t always physical. It’s just harder to admit when it’s not physical. People would say I was so lucky to be dating him, this hot, young, Alpha doctor. But no one could see what he was doing to my spirit. Nothing I ever did was good enough. My career was a hobby, I should be a nurse so we could work together. I spent too much time on my books. I spent too much time training and doing therapy with Cooper. Anything that took my attention away from him. He wanted a good little Omega who stayed home and served him. He wanted to mark me but I just couldn’t let him.”

“How did you get away?”

“Cooper actually.” You give the dog a couple of chin scratches, “He told me I had to choose, my dog or him and the choice was easy. People said I was stupid but I was just glad to be rid of him, as much as I could be in a town this size.”

“I’m proud of you.” You look at him in surprise, most people tell you that they’re sorry, “you got out and you’ve stayed out.” There’s a soft tap on the doorframe and after a moment Dr. May walks into your room.

“Hey, so what brings you in today?”

“Branch fell on me and knocked me unconscious. I got the okay from Bucky to go home but Steve wants to make sure I’m good.”

“I don’t think any of her ribs are broken but I’d like to be sure before anything happens. Our EMT cleared her for concussion but the fact that she went unconscious is concerning.”

“Ah, so that’s who Bucky is.” You nod, “I’m seeing some shoulder favoritism too?”

“Yea, it hit my shoulder first.”

“Okay, let’s get your shirt off so I can take a look, if you want Captain Rogers to leave I can help you.”

“He’s already seen it.” You tell her and he helps ease you out of your shirt again.

Melinda ends up ordering some x-rays for you. The only time Steve leaves your side is when she walks you to the x-ray room. She takes the time to make sure you feel safe.

“Honestly, he makes me feel so safe, I wouldn’t have come without him. Did Phil tell you what happened?”

“Yea,” she tells you with a smirk, “I wish he would’ve decked him.” You chuckle softly, “he’s crazy about you.”

“Who?” Oh god please don’t say Grant.

“Captain Rogers.”

“He’s also an Alpha, you know how I feel about Alphas.”

Tag list:

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[wizkiddx]

hiiiii i love your stuff - could u do one where the readers ill but they have stuff to do and tom has to look after her. maybe if they were just friends before too but both pining? thankuuuuuuuuu

should I be writing this instead of revising? clearly fucking not. Did I make this little blurb req ridiculously long purely to procrastinate? Of fucking course.

but also this was v cute! I assumed u meant famous!reader, sorry if that's not what u were after at all anon x

summary: Tom Holland turns into the readers knight in shining armour when they get ill during promo

warnings: fainting / feeling ill

///////////////////

It couldn’t be today. Of all days, why today? You’d been at home for two weeks doing absolutely nothing, before this trip. And yet it’s when your itinerary is packed to the brim, people moving heaven and earth just speak to you. Two weeks of unrelenting press for Marvels next big ensemble movie. 

Your manager was speaking to you, reeling off a run down of todays activities but instead of listening you nodded along blankly - head rather cloudy with this heavy mist that was not shaking off, no matter how hard you tried. 

“You got that Y/n/n?” Lucy pointedly spoke, eyes almost physically knocking you backwards as if her eyeliner was battery rams. Fumbling with your thoughts, your answer wasn’t particularly cohesive earning you just a disappointed head shake. 

“I um… yeh I think. Who-who did you say I was paired up with?” 

“Y/n please for the love of god. Tom, like I said the past fifty times.” And to be fair to Lucy she wasn’t wrong. It was the first major major promo tour for the both of you and after just two days so far - you were both exhausted. She was more than allowed to be a bit short tempered. 

“But we-we hardly know each other? The chemistry won’t be there and-“

“As I said, I tried to re-jig it but Kevin is of the mind that acting is your job.” Her tone was sharp but as she glared across the opposing seats, in the little mini van Marvel had hired for you as transportation, her eyes softened. Lucy had been so wrapped up in her own stress she may have overlooked quite how gingerly you were sitting. By the time she had arrived at the hotel, your stylist had already managed to half save your ghoulish looking face, with sunken under eyes and tired skin, so it wasn’t so blatantly obvious how crap you were feeling.  “Is everything okay with you?” 

It felt pretty puny to say that the jet lag from flying to Tokyo had been weighing you down further than you wanted, or that the local cuisine top chefs had kindly prepared for you last night wasn’t siting well in your stomach. To be honest, even you thought it was just your body being a bit overdramatic. So in response, you put on your best happy-go-lucky face feigning a smile.

“No no I’m fine, just want to give the best interviews I can and you know…. I’m awkward as hell as it is, then pair me with the most talented actor that I share about two minutes of screen time with…it’ll be interesting.” 

The way Lucy reacted with a weird slow nod, eyebrows furrowed, meant it was quite apparent you had perhaps overplayed that one. Had you not been so over the day before it even began, you would’ve tried again to give a more believable act. But as you were, you turned your attention back out to the bustling streets of Tokyo and the high rise buildings bordering each pavement. 

You didnt have a problem with Tom, far from it in fact. Tom was hilarious and the times you had met him, you’d both built up this weird and sarcastic competitiveness with each other. It was a game of who could get the last laugh, each of you pushing each other with the Mickey taking just a little further. Of course, not in a malicious way, just the way you’d both lived pretty similar but parallel careers - when everyone drew comparisons between the both of you, it was nice to make it a joke. 

Like Tom you’d also started out on stage, had a ‘big break’ movie as a kid and then spent your teenage years on and off film sets - till marvel happened. Then everything blew up to epic proportions, changing your life forever. Actually, it was so similar to Tom’s story, plus the fact you were also from the south west of the UK. It was bizarre your paths hadn’t crossed more - He probably could’ve been a useful ally in the the whole ‘becoming famous’ thing. 

And yet, you could probably count on two hands the amount of conversations you’d had with him. 

Now that, that was the issue. Right from the beginning you learn what the press want and when you are publicising a movie you cater into it too. They’d all be asking for the insider scoop on set; what pranks you’d pulled on each other; what was the most annoying thing about each other. Which is hard if you’d only had 5 or 6 days actually on set together. 

By the time the cab had wormed its way through the Tokyo traffic and you arrived at the PR hotel, it was already 9:30 - making you 15 minutes late (blame it on the traffic). Instantly then you were ushered straight to the interview room for the evening, no chance of green room chat or grabbing a drink before. The place was stuffy, everything was draped with black curtains except the poster board that Tom was already sitting infront of. 

He’d scrubbed up well, no doubt about it. He was wearing statement-ish burgundy suit trousers, teamed with a black knitted but collared shirt thing - that was clearly tailor made for the man. As soon as he noticed you scurry into the room, his face broke out into a warm smile, jumping up to greet you in a friendly hug. It was brief, and as you pulled back you accidentally bumped your head on one of the overhanging lights. No doubt someone had spent a ridiculous amount of time configuring them so they were positioned perfectly, which you had just ruined with your big head. 

“Oh shit!” Tom just laughed in response, shaking his head slightly as he lead you the two steps across to your pre-positioned seats. 

“Making an entrance as always I see!”

“Yeh, you know me, a bit of chaos just to keep everyone on their toes.”

“Oh is that why you’re ‘fashionably late’” With a playful wiggle of his eyebrows, you just rolled your eyes, fidgeting on the chair to find a position that didnt aggravate  your stomach so much.

“I’m ready now though! What did I miss? Just having to pretend to be your friend for 15 minutes?” You stressed the words as though the thought of conversation with Tom was the absolute worst thing in the world - which you definetly didnt think. Scowling like you’d insulted his dog Tessa, it was almost visible how the cogs were turning in his head looking for a comeback. Unfortunately for him though, he was quickly shut up but the organiser bringing the first interviewer in . 

For what would, no doubt, be a long day. 

////

Everything had started off so well, the banter was flowing between you and Tom, no major spoilers revealed that meant Marvel would have to make the journalist disappear. It was once you hit an hour of back-to-back interviews that everything started to crack bit. Because yes, it had only been an hour but that was enough to exhaust you on this particular day. When Tom joked around you got slower and slower, similarly the  energy was zapped from your own answers. It’s not very compelling when someone says ‘you have to watch this movie’ in a monotonous voice with sullen eyes. 

As the interviewers were swapping in and out, Tom actually lightly nudged your shoulder.

“Everything alright? We’re trying to sell tickets and you’ve got a face like thunder.”

“Oh no-no sorry I just, I-um.”

“You want some water?” Now looking at your with more concerned eyes, as if he was just nervous he’d actually offended you for calling you a boring bastard. And you would’ve picked up on it and alleviated his concerns, if it weren’t for the fact your eyes were glued on the water bottle he was holding out to you. You were thirsty. You knew that, that wasn’t the conundrum. What you weren’t so sure about was whether your stomach would accept it, or more violently reject it. In a very non ‘we’re-trying-to-sell-a-movie’ style. 

But the lightheaded fogginess in your brain won out, as you nodded jerkily, taking the bottle and taking a little swig - too cautious to take anymore. 

Now concerned with how Tom thought you were being a Debby-downer too, you managed to perk yourself up for the next four interviews. They were easy, asking questions without any activity and though you did rely on Tom beefing out and adding to your answers, it was okay. Then the next interviewer came in, who you recognised as being from the BBC, Ali Plumb, that had interviewed you a number of times. From the way Tom jumped up to give him afirendly bro-hug, you guessed he also was familiar with him. As soon as he took a seat the cameras were already flashing with the red light, demonstrating his 7 minutes had already started. 

“Guys! It’s been a while.” 

“How are you Ali?” You started it off with the pleasantries, Tom echoing, before the speccy dirty-blonde asked his first question. 

“So the last time I spoke to you guys the universe was in chaos, Peter Parkers on the run and Aurora Blake was trying to strip her own powers, so I guess my first question is how are you both doing? We can use this as a therapy session if you guys need.” His very typical nerdy joke made Tom laugh, nodding as he leaned forward and repositioned a bit. 

You didn’t share the same humour though, more focused on this invisible blanket of stuffiness that seemed to have been thrown on top of you. It made you feel groggy, incredibly hot and so unbelievable nauseous. The lights weren’t helping either, it felt like you were pouring with sweat from your forehead. You thought Tom was answering Ali, even if you couldn’t really hear  - everything had merged into a deafening roar. Adrenaline coursed through your veins, unconsciously making you fumble yourself to standing, desperate to get somewhere with fresh air. The last thing you saw before your vision tunnelled into darkness was Tom, reaching out to try and catch you. 

Because next thing you knew, you were on the floor, wires from all the cameras and lights digging into your back as you looked up to see Tom on one side and Lucy on the other - both wearing a similarly panicked expression. You knew you hadn’t been out long, seconds if that, going by the fact everyone else was in the ‘oh my god’ phase of panic. It was a bit weird how calm you where, but then again all your life you’d been the ‘class fainter’. Waking up on the floor was something you were long since used to. 

“Y/n? You awake?” Rather stating the obvious Tom asked the question as you bent your head up - allowing you sight of all the concerned facing oggling you. With a defeated sigh, you flopped your head back. 

“If this is a dream then it’s a real bloody nightmare.” This time Tom didnt seem to appreciate your joke, looking at you without almost dumbfounded eyes, as you blinked repetitively and groaned. 

“Why didn’t you say anything?” Lucy appeared to want to lecture you, which to be honest wasn’t the most time appropriate. You were still on the floor, legs crumpled up under you, so ignored her. Instead you pulled yourself up into a sitting position, taking a moment to blink away the blotchy haze that threatened to takeover your vision once again, whilst the pair above you both cautiously rested their palms on each of your shoulders -trying to be useful. The room still felt cramped and stifling, as everyone around were no doubt looking at you. 

It took a few minutes but your body seemed to get over itself, sitting up normally and trying to make small talk with Ali - who, by the way, was still sat awkwardly in the chair. Still nestled on the floor, your back up against the chair you had been siting on as you raved with Ali of the Harry Potter theatre show. In a natural lull in conversation, Tom perked up - from the door where he’d been muttering with the organiser as Lucy bit her nails nervously. 

“Y/n you need to go home.” 

All of you knew what Tom said was impossible. Not being egotistical, but you were too important. Although you hadn’t been paying masses of attention for Lucy’s run down of your itinerary - you knew it was packed. 

So you just looked up and rolled your eyes at Tom, earning yourself a strong glare, before locking the organiser in eye contact.

“How many have we got till lunch?” 

“Um this gent here” He gesturned toward Ali, who was almost squirming in his seat now “then two more.”  

“And then lunch?” 

“Yes, then you have a personal appearance at a dinner, so transport will be coming to pick you both up.” This poor guy seemed obsessed with the clock and his timetable, looking at your with a mixture of panic and frustration. You should know this stuff, you should’ve listened to Lucy. 

“How fars the drive?” 

“At this time probably an hour and a half.” 

The plan was clear in your head, you’d sort yourself out in the car and be fully fine by the afternoon and evening engagements. Plus you felt almost fine now. So with a sigh, you hauled yourself up onto the chair, patting for Tom to sit back down. 

“It’s half an hour and then I’ll sort myself out at lunch - come on their waiting.” The way Lucy pouted showed she disagreed somewhat, except a stern look kept her from protesting, as Tom walked toward you. 

“Are you sure you don’t loo-“

“Let me stop you before you insult my appearance.” Snickering slightly at his worried face, you laughed it off , knocking his side with a gentle murmur of ‘don’t worry about me’. 

In fact after that little episode you did feel a little recovered, which meant you were properly noticing the change in the boy sat next to you. Throughout the remaining three interviews he’d done a complete 360 from earlier. Rather than trying to get little digs at you, he had become fiercely protective - jumping in if a questions wasn’t particularly appropriate or relevant to the movie ( meaning when an awfully crap man asked what underwear you’d been able to wear in your suit) ; taking the heat of the conversation as well as just watching you like a hawk. Each time you answered his beady brown eyes were watching you from the side, you got the impression it wasn’t only just because of the risk of spoilers. 

Quite remarkably, you survived the rest of the day pretty well, after a power nap in the car on the way over - even if it was a bit difficult when you had your manager watching you like a hawk from the seat across. It was as if Lucy had never seen anyone ill before, she seemed concerned that you were going to spontaneously stop breathing and die at any point. 

Though by the time all the official business at the dinner was done, your body and willpower had reached the end of their tether. You and Tom were both on a round table, surrounded by 6 CEOs and execs of what seemed to be a multimillion pound business enterprise. With the language barrier meaning you had to speak through the two people on the table who were fluent in both japanese and English, the conversation was already pretty jilted. Though to be fair, the six did seem to be enjoying the evening - something you werent able to reciprocate. Thankfully, five minutes after the main course dishes had been collected, Tom spoke up from his position opposite you.

“This has been lovely and we really appreciate your time and generosity but me and Y/n have a really early start tomorrow so I think we should probably get back to the hotel.” You swore in that moment you could’ve kissed him, and it looked like Tom could tell - by the way your shoulders sagged and you let out an exhale of pure relief. Apparently even if you’d managed to convince the hosts you were enjoying the evening, Tom easily saw through the performance. After some hurried goodbyes, Tom led you out of the hall with his hand hovering over your lowerback, trying to make sure your exit was as discreet as possible. 

Away from the bubble of chatter and activity, in the deserted hallway, Tom stopped you - lightly holding both hands on each of your arms. 

“Wheres your team?” 

“Um Luce is back at the hotel, she was trying to see if she could reschedule any of my stuff tomorrow.” You winced at the way he sighed, realising you were all on your own in some random business event hall in Tokyo.

“Harry -my brother- is waiting in the car at the front - is that okay?”

“No Tom, don’t worry abo-“

“Yeh well I am and I think you feel ten times worse than you’re letting on.” He spoke harshly, like a school teacher telling you off - except the hint of a kind smile at the end was a dead giveaway. 

“You sure?” 

With a relieved nod (Tom had thought you might be a bit more stubborn - you obviously were really really ill) he wordlessly shrugged his suit jacket off, wrapping it round your shoulders. He muttered something about not wanting you to catch a chill but to be quite honest you were a bit distracted by the woody cedar smell of Toms aftershave that enveloped your senses. Maybe it wasn’t so bad being fussed on by him? To be fair he wasn’t wrong either, you were in a strapless evening dress - you would’ve preferred to be in joggers, but Marvels press team had other ideas. 

After a quick pit stop at the toilets, the two of you managed to make an unnoticed escape out the building - into a big SUV which had seconds prior pulled up onto the steps. You literally melted into the nearest window seat, body hunching over as you probably crumpled Tom’s jacket beyond belief. 2 seats along from you, a frizzy haired boy gave you a sympathetic smile, which you returned weakly whilst muttering a ‘hi’. Meanwhile, Tom pulled the sliding door shut, sitting across from you. 

“Oh Y/n this is Harry and Harry this is Y/n.” In unison both of you replied with an ‘I know’ eye roll. Your response was somewhat more shocking to both Holland boys, you could tell from the way they had this whole nonverbal conversation with their eyes - they were very clearly brothers. Needing to explain you continued. “I like to keep tabs on my castmates, I’ve seen you on Toms instagram.” That had both boys smirking, Harry presumably just because you knew who he was; Tom more smugly, you’d just given away you slightly stalked him on instagram. 

Silence reigned for a moment, as the driver put his foot down slightly. 

“How you doing?” Tom asked. 

“Mhm…” you thought for a second, how to eloquently describe the sensation. 

“shit.” 

Both boys chuckled a little and even though you had closed your eyes in an attempt to dull the throbbing behind your temples, you could feel the eyes on you. 

“You want the music off?” Harry asked, referring to the indie-rock coming quietly out the speakers of his laptop, which was resting on his lap. With a shake of your head you refused, even if really silence probably would help your head, you were already causing the two Hollands enough trouble - no need to bore them during the journey back into central Tokyo, especially when you weren’t the most enthusiastic company ever. 

Thankfully the music stayed on a low volume, whilst the car seemed to settle into a comfortable silence. With a long exhale you fluttered your eyes open, seeing Tom focused on his phone, before you rested the side of your head against the black-out glass. Taking some relief from the cool glass, you huddled further into the corner of the car against the door.

Floating in the space between sleep and wakefulness, you were kind of aware of your head occasionally bobbing and jerking about - but really didn’t have the energy or willpower to do anything about it. Instead, the thing that perked your attention was hearing some supposed-whispering from inside the body of the car.

“I know she said she didn’t care but she was clearly lying-“ 

“Like you know! You’ve been desperate to try and spend some time with Y/n- maybe you poisoned her just so you could be all knight-in-shini-“

“Turn. The. Music. Off.” Tom sounded scathing now, and with a grumble from your other-side the cheery drum beats ceased.

“Happy now?” …and Harry was sarcastic. 

“Swap places with me.”

“What?”

“Just do it.”

“Why?”

“So she can lie down.” 

“Well no because you would still be in the way if we swapped.”

“Yeh but she can lie on my lap idiot.”

“She can lie on me.”

“She doesn’t know you!”

“Well for 1, barely ten minutes ago she said she did know me. And 2, she doesn’t know you any better!”

If this was their version of whispering, you would love to hear what volume ‘shouting’ was. There was no reply for a short while, you imagined the two brunettes locked in some intense staring match.The next time Tom spoke he sounded more defeated - almost begging. 

“If I admit you beat me at the driving range the other day will you-” 

“I KNEW IT!” Harry yelped, the volume making you jerk, eyes flying open before reflexively closing because the light was too bright. There was a little mutter of an apology, then silence again. 

Once agin you must’ve drifted off because it felt like absolutely no time had passed when a firm but gently hand on your shoulder nudged you awake. 

Sure enough the boys had swapped position, Tom now sitting along the seat from you, Harry looked a little sulky from across the way. It was Tom who was reaching over, a gentle and peaceful smile on his face.

“You wanna lie down? Don’t want you to strain your neck.” He wasn’t wrong, adding to the throbbing headache, the cloudiness in your brain and the unsettled feeling in your stomach… now your neck hurt. Just bloody great. 

Had you been your normal witty and perceptive self, you might’ve teased Tom as to why him and his brother had done a switch - but everything hurt and all you wanted to do was sleep for a hundered years. So with squinting eyes you jerkily nodded, missing how Tom chuckled to himself. The guy undid your seatbelt, then sat back to let you balance the back of your head on his thigh, looking up at the roof of the SUV. Already your eyes were closed again, you kicked off your slip-on heels and bent your legs up to lean against the backrest - occupying the position you had been sat in before hand. You felt his hands reposition the jacket, pulling it round so it was now like a blanket tucked under your chin. 

To be fair it was much more comfortable than sitting up and you weren’t even aware of how quickly you dropped back into sleep. 

Though it wasn’t quick enough to miss Harry’s very sulky sounding comment, presumably meant only for Tom’s ears. 

“Still think you’re being fucking creepy bro.” 

<33 lemme know what u think! (would make me feel less guilty for not doing all the work I rlly should be doing aha)

tagging : @hallecarey1 @crossyourpeter @hollandfanficlove

[pennylanewrites]

Day 49 of Zeke brainrot. My brain is slowly shutting. Enjoy something that came to me in a dream.

cw: none! fluffy fluff with zeke being absolutely smitten <3

( gn!reader )

Zeke always came home from work tired, yawning and ready to fall asleep the moment he took his shoes off in the doorway. On Mondays, Tuesdays and Fridays, the house was empty. You worked later than him those days, a covered plate of food left for him in the fridge with a stick note that read ‘I love you. See you soon’ and a little doodle. He would take the note and place it in a box he kept in the bedroom, filled with notes from the six years you’ve been together, then come back to the food. Some days he ate it cold, other days he warmed it up; he always ate all of it, cleaned the kitchen up and went straight to bed for a nap until you were home.

He was glad today was Thursday. It meant you were home at 5 p.m., the time he clocked off work. This Thursday was probably the worst of the year, his hands tired from writing and typing, his feet numb from walking up and down the floors -the elevator just had to be out of order. Barely able to hold himself up, he turned the key on the door as his other hand undid his black tie.

“Honey, I’m home.” He was faced with complete silence, except for some music playing from the old record player in the corner of the living room. His heart skipped a beat. He was so excited to finally see you, but where did you go?

Rubbing his eyes, Zeke almost stumbled on your legs, but kept himself up. He looked down to see your body sprawled on the floor between the couch and the coffee table, a smile coming to take the place of his tired expression. He always wondered how you managed to fall asleep in the weirdest spots, from the bathroom floor to the kitchen granite island. An open book was left on your face, shielding your eyes from the blinding sun that came through the window. Zeke shut the curtains and unbuttoned the top button of his dress shirt, allowing himself to be more comfortable.

He didn’t have the patience to go up the stairs and get changed. He could do that later. Zeke made sure his phone was on silent, before getting on the floor and removing the book covering your face. His calloused fingers caressed your cheek, then your brow bone, meeting the space between your brows and pushing up with his thumb to release the furrow that was forming in your sleep.

“You’ll get wrinkly.” You’d always say to him when he got worried and furrowed his eyebrows, so he often found himself performing that little habit of yours as well.

“Zeke, are you home?” You mumbled, shifting in your sleep.

“Shh. I’m home. Go back to sleep.”

“Go get changed.” He smiled sheepishly. You knew him so well, you didn’t even have to open your eyes to know.

“I missed you.” He said as he settled between your thighs, resting his head on your stomach and wrapping his arms around you to protect your back from the hard floor, not caring that his arms would be sore when he would wake up.

“Me too.” You responded with a yawn. Your hands met his head unconsciously, taking his glasses off and throwing them on the couch. He smiled at your action, pushing his face further against your warmer body, taking in the scent of your body wash and the laundry detergent he used to hate when he first met you. Your fingers found their place at the nape of his neck, bringing him to sleep as you played with his blond hair. When his breath started feeling heavy, and his hands relaxed around you, it meant he was asleep, so you allowed yourself to fall back to sleep. This time with a smile instead of a frown, to match the sleepy smile on Zeke’s face, that somehow was obvious even mostly covered by his beard.

Guess that’s what love does to you.

taglist: @ucallmelavanderucallmesunshine @chaotic-nick @jerxsha

[dreaminpetals]

COMMISSION: norton & naib watch their s/o bleed out on the rocket chair, then comfort each other after 🧲 ���

norton campbell ;;

Your heart dropped to your feet when you heard the chime that indicated a survivor had been knocked down. You prayed as you decoded ー Please don't be Nor, please don't be Nor ...

Hearing a laboured "Focus on decoding!" confirmed your fears. It was muffled, distant, but distinct. Norton had been chaired.

The frantic hammering of your heart in your ears overtook your senses as you sprinted towards the chair, shouting to Helena that you were going to rescue him. Your heart overpowers your brain whenever Norton is in even the slightest ounce of danger. This was one of those instances. You should have thought twice before hurrying to his aid.

You exhaled a sigh of relief when you approached his chair and noticed there was no hunter to be seen. Norton however had the opposite reaction. His expression contorted into one of pure terror when he saw you were the one rescuing him.

"Leave me! Get away from me!" His words fell to deaf ears as you dashed towards him, arms open and ready to free him from his confines.

Everything was going smoothly until you heard the words that would stay with you forever.

"Jack is behind you!"

It was a trap.

In a heartbeat, your back was slashed open and you collapsed to your hands and knees.

"Lovebirds," Jack hummed, stomping on your wounded back, earning a scream from Norton. "Now, where's that decoder..." he turned on his heel and vanished to hunt down Helena with an unmistakable bloodlust.

You weren't panicking yet. You could simply heal yourself, andー

You were out of self heals.

"The hunter is near me!" Helena wailed from across the map, sending ice straight down the spines of you and your boyfriend. The fourth survivor had been eliminated already. There was no saving you.

Norton's entire body was wracked by sobs as you lay curled in a ball on the ground, writhing around in utter agony. If it wasn't for the bar squeezing him down into the rocket chair, he would bandage you up and press endless kisses onto your bloodied skin, his own safety be damned.

He had never seen anybody bleed out before. The Prospector has always managed to heal his teammates, his only punishments being faced on rocket chairs. In Norton's eyes, you were going to die.

"It's okay," you choked out, "I'll be... be..."

"You're going to die," Norton whimpered in the highest tone you've ever heard from him. He sounded like a child with the way his raspy voice cracked.

Your eyes widened at his words. Did he think bleeding out was fatal? Oh no.

You ached to explain to him that the worst consequences were comas that lasted no longer than a week, but you were losing strength. Fast. As your throat closed up, speech became more and more difficult. It felt as if glass was piercing your windpipe, concealing the truth from your guilt stricken lover.

"'Sall my fault... fuck, I love you, okay?" He hiccuped through strained wheezes for air.

'Don't say that... I'll be okay...' you yearned to respond, but each second the invisible weight on your back grew, crushing you further.

Although your vision was spotting and blurring, you could see Norton tremble where he sat. His fingers gripped the bar holding him hostage until they bled. He was using all of his strength to attempt to free you somehow.

With one final, ragged breath, you closed your eyes and succumbed to your injuries. Norton didn't scream like you thought he would. He watched you sink into the ground in utter silence, sniffing back tears and coughing sporadically.

Despite the agony you endured mere minutes ago, you weren't rendered unconscious like previous, less fortunate survivors. You could walk, albeit with jittery legs and a weight on your back forcing you down. Having regained some strength, you noted that you could speak as well. Every bone in your body was aching for you to find Norton and save him from his unnecessary grief.

You immediately captured Helena's undivided attention when you hobbled into the manor, leaving a steady red trail behind you. She wrapped your wounds up with the first aid kit she kept on her, the smell of blood that lingered in the air faded with every careful swipe of your skin. Since you were in the room for injured survivors, Norton didn't see you when he stormed back into the manor. His physical wounds were nothing compared to his emotional ones. If only Helena finished patching you up just a minute earlier, he could have seen that you survived far earlier.

"Norton is in your room, by the way," Helena began, patting you on the back to signal that her work was done, "in the one you share. I asked where he was going."

"Our room," you repeated to yourself under your breath. You thanked Helena and promptly headed to your room, legs carrying you as fast as they could take you.

You were out of breath once you reached your shared room. A series of knocks on the door were greeted with silence. You noticed that the static sobbing from the room paused for a moment, then resumed.

Twisting your key into the door and unlocking it, you saw Norton swiftly hide your shirt underneath your pillow. Was he trying to get the last of your scent before it faded away forever?

"So. You've come to haunt me too." He spat, burning holes into your face with his unwelcoming glare. "Just like everyone else from the mines. Fuck off."

"Norton, it's me,"

"You're only pretending to be them. Second I acknowledge you're not real you'll go away."

His words shattered your heart.

Approaching him with caution, you kneeled onto the bed beside him and placed your palm on his cheek. He leaned into your touch despite his harsh words, his tear streaked face dampening your hand. "If I wasn't real, would I be this warm?" You whispered as soft as your voice could manage to be. His eyebrows furrowed as he stared into your eyes, searching for any signs of life. Your eyes were too warm and full of adoration to be a hallucination, a ghost, a memory.

"How did you...?" he began, teetering on the verge of tears again.

"I'm hurt, but... I'd never die on you, Nor. It's okay. I'm here." You pressed a nurturing kiss to his nose and felt his face heat up underneath yours. Pressing your forehead against his, he felt no malicious intent from you, unlike all the other visions he saw of his deported loved ones. He felt nothing but love and kindness from you, the same way he's always remembered you.

"It's really you," he uttered your name like a prayer, voice flickering above a whisper, before enveloping you in his arms and pulling you snug close to him. He bawled into your shoulder, letting the warmth of your body comfort him after one of the most horrifying moments of his life. You could feel his snot and hot tears bubble on your shoulder but you didn't mind in the slightest. You were home, in Norton's arms.

You knew that for Norton to cry in front of you, he was wounded deep. It was rare to see tears fall from his eyes and to feel him cling to you, terrified of letting go. Between pants, you could hear him beg for you to stay and never die on him. His pleas were answered by soft hushes and gentle kisses.

Norton pulled away for a fleeting moment to turn you around and examine your wounded back. There was a rip through your top and underneath were bandages stained with dry blood. Helena did a decent job of patching you up, though she definitely missed a few spots. Norton pressed chaste kisses to the exposed skin, his silent way of reassuring you he loved you no matter what.

"I'll kill him for doing this to you," your boyfriend hissed, teeth ghosting along your flesh. "I'll make him pay." His mouth was still connected to your back, and he could feel you shiver in response to his words.

"Nor, you don't needー"

"I'll never let anyone hurt you again. If anyone... if anyone ever does this to you a second time, I'll..."

"Norton."

Your sudden sharp tone caused him to freeze. Had he gone too far? His demeanour immediately switched and he pulled away from you, offering you a toothy grin to show he sincerely meant no harm.

You pulled your shirt back down and turned around so your calm eyes could meet his wide ones. "I'll be okay. I'm more worried about you, if anything. Come here." You patted your lap and the back of Norton's fluffy hair soon met your thighs. He laid down and began to rub the tears from his eyes, before you pushed his hands away and rubbed them into nothingness yourself.

He loved laying in your lap. Whether he was having flashbacks of past events, or if he was hurt from a match, laying his head on your soft thighs and gazing up at you with love never failed to calm him down. He felt so safe and warm.

"Have a little rest, Nor. I'll be here when you wake up." You rubbed calming circles into his hair as he nodded. His eyes closed, then opened again to ensure that you really were there and you truly were alive. You shushed him, both hands massaging his scalp until he drifted off into a comfortable sleep. He would do anything for you.

naib subedar ;;

"Naib's been containing the hunter for so long, you think we should help out?" Luca asked you as the two of you drummed away at a cipher machine together. You nodded your head in agreement, pulling yourself away from the noisy machine and overturning your empty pockets.

"I don't have any self heals, though. I'll shout if I need anything." This time it was Luca's turn to nod as he smacked the machine, steadily making progress towards your escape.

You roamed the abandoned factory for a few moments before hearing a distant yelp and the sound of someone falling to the ground. You followed the source of the sound to the factory, and the metallic clunks of Guard 26 carrying your lover to the basement made your skin crawl. This rescue was going to be tremendously difficult.

"Don't rescue me!" Naib managed to rasp as the hunter slammed him into the rocket chair. You could hear the pain in his voice even though he tried to mask it. It was always like Naib to hide his true feelings behind a cold front.

You knew Guard 26 chairing your only rescuer in the basement was a recipe for disaster, but you wanted to at least attempt to save him.

Hopping down the stairs, you were met face to face with the hunter. Their cogs whirred as they advanced towards you, and you stunned them momentarily.

"Oh, you're so stupid [Name]," Naib sighed as your fingers danced across the bar holding him captive. "Go back to where it's safe!" You ignored his cries and slid to the side, dodging one of Guard 26's strikes. The floor began to light up in an array of colours under you which you miraculously dodged, earning a gasp from your chaired lover.

Unfortunately, you weren't able to pull off the rescue of your dreams this time. You attempted to psyche out the hunter and trick them into hitting the chair, but their spiked bat met your side before you could pull away. Despite arriving without even a scratch, the impact of being hit as you rescued caused you to fall to your knees.


Blood pooled underneath you and you gritted your teeth as you waited to be chaired, the pain overriding your senses and bringing tears to your eyes.

That relief never came.

The haunting dings of Guard 26 slowly dissipated as they hopped up the stairs to find Luca. There were several other chairs in the basement, why didn't they chair you? It must be in their wiring to save as much time as possible.

You clutched at your stomach, wincing as crimson bloomed on your shirt. Panic hadn't filled your veins yet. You applied pressure to your wound, using the same healing tactics Naib had taught you before. Your plan was to do all you could while you were downed, then call Luca for help at the last minute.

Until Luca was terrorshocked.

Your eyes snapped up to meet Naib's the second you both heard him collapse against the cipher machine. Anxiety began to set in, your movements growing more sloppy. You nicked yourself more often, and Naib noticed it too.

"Easy there... Deep breaths, all right?" He cooed, wriggling to free himself from the grip of the rocket chair. His struggles were unsuccessful, though. No matter how hard he tried to escape for you, the chair wasn't merciful whatsoever.

You felt your body grow numb as you lost more blood. You could no longer feel the cold tiles of the basement. To you, everything was cold. You scooched closer to the chair Naib was trapped in and extended a hand. "Naib, I... I can't feel my legs," although his movements were limited, he was able to wrap his hand around yours and squeeze it tight.

"You're gonna be fine." He was lying through his teeth. Naib could see the glassy look in your eyes, hell, as your hand quivered in his, he could feel the life draining from it. Your voice wasn't a comfort to him anymore, every word you spoke was full of agony and he wished you would stay quiet as to not worry him more.

Naib has seen this before. He's been pinned under debris, forced to watch a comrade succumb to their injuries. It's why he's the man he is today. Always self-sacrificing, never leaving anyone behind. Yet he couldn't extend the same behaviour to you... his lover was bleeding out in front of him and there was absolutely nothing he could do. He tried so desperately to hide the fear from his face, but a single tear slid down his cheek and his expression sunk when he felt you begin to fade away. As you melted into the ground, Naib cried out your name until there was nothing left of you to hold. Then he followed.

You were awoken by the sound someone scurrying towards you. Rubbing your eyes, you saw a flash of colour before an excited hand met your shoulder. "You're finally up. Can you walk?" It took a few moments to process Naib's words. As you scanned the room around you, you spotted bouquets of flowers and numerous get well soon cards.

"What... what happened to me?" You groggily asked as you gazed at your hands. They had been bandaged up with care.

Naib swallowed hard as he replied, "you've been out for around a day. I've been looking after you... hope you don't mind." As your vision adjusted to the bright lights of your room, you noticed his shirt had been discarded and his chest was wrapped tightly in bandages. Both of you were left bruised and battered from that hellish match, it seems.

Your heart soared as you thought about how much Naib must adore you to watch over you like that. Though he acted coolly as if his actions were no big deal, you could sense that he was still worried about you. He touched you as if you were made of glass and his usual scratchy voice was replaced by a soft, considerate one ー an attempt to ease your anxieties and make you more comfortable.

"C'mon, let's get you cleaned up," his hand connected to yours and eased your weight onto the floor below you. You stumbled over your feet, but quickly met Naib's chest as his arms wrapped around your back. "Easy there, I've got you." He let you lean on him for support and helped you peel off your bloodied shirt before drawing a bath for you.

Naib kneeled beside the bubblebath you rested in, scrubbing your hair with his calloused fingers. It tickled ever so slightly, you couldn't remember the last time somebody had handled you with such care. His hands maneuvered around your body with precision and care as he washed away all of the dirt and dust that marred your skin.

A comfortable silence hung in the air until you decided to speak up, "what about you? Do you want me to wash you as well?"

Naib's expression softened when he heard your voice. "Iー uh, I'm good." His blunt response didn't match his gaze in the slightest.

"I can see you wince every time you lift your arms. And you smell."

"...Fine." He huffed in defeat, beckoning you to scootch forward to make room for him in the tub. You felt the water splash as he took a seat behind you and pulled you into his arms. "Hey. What you did yesterday... don't do it again, okay? I don't want you getting hurt ever again."

You turned over your shoulder to face him and he offered you a faint smile. It wasn't like his usual smug grins, it was more tender, something he couldn't get rid of upon seeing you awake again.

You could keep your head in Naib's warm chest forever, his steady heartbeat and the occasional ripples of water filling your ears. You were on the verge of falling asleep when you remembered that Naib needed to be scrubbed too.

Lifting his arms up above your head, you escaped his gentle grasp and turned around to face him. His expression was one of grumpiness after you slithered free from his arms, but the second you grabbed a loofah and massaged his skin his gaze molded into a loving one. His cuts had faded and closed up but they were definitely visible, and they looked like they hurt. A lot.

"I'm sorry for being so reckless, I just wanted you to get out safe." You whispered between fond swipes of his chest, really getting the soap in there.

He rested his arms on the edges of the tub, huffing in response. "When I tell you not to rescue, don't rescue, okay? Your safety's more important than mine." You attempted to object to his brash statement, but he shut you up with a kiss and stole the breath from your lips. Your lips remained connected for a few lingering seconds, and Naib deepened the kiss right as you expected him to pull away.

"...I thought I was going to lose you," he muttered against your skin, pulling away and pressing another, sweeter kiss to the corner of your lips. "Water's getting cold... let's get out," he drained the tub and scooped you up into his arms, bringing you to your bed and wrapping you up in a bathrobe. You were perfectly capable of dressing yourself, but Naib's must-take-care-of-lover instincts refused to let you do that.

He snuggled up to you from behind, nose breathing in the fresh scent of your hair. "Goodnight, love." And you dozed off in his arms, ever protective of you.

[fleur-de-violette]

And I’ll look into your eyes to find out if I’m real

A3O Summary: Bruce wants a lot of things. A bath. Seeing his family. Not having been missing for a whole year.

He wants Dick to wake up and realize he’s not a hallucination.

Whumptober 2020 day 6 – Stop, please. Note: Have you seen that the whumptober 2021 prompts are out? They’re super cool and I didn’t finish the 2020 so it’s safe to say I won’t do them. Still, I’m excited for it.

Back to the fic, warning for hallucination, lots of crying and pretty much general angst. Enjoy!

-

Bruce wants a bath.

He wants a lot of things. One of them is a bath. He never considered himself too dependent on the luxuries that came with his civilian identity, but right now, he really wants to be in clean, warm water with a nice scent, maybe a few candles, and some relaxing music.

It isn’t as much about the bath itself, because he had the time to clean himself, warm up and relax his aching muscles in the shower, it’s the idea of it. He wants to be in a moment where he could allow himself to lose time without feeling guilty about the next crisis. These moments are too rare, if not nonexistent, in his life. And now isn’t one of these moments.

Bruce wants a lot of things.

He wants Alfred not to look so tired. He wants to see Tim smile, really smile. He wants to take the next flight to Hong Kong just so he can hug Cassandra. He wants to solve a case with Steph, watch that smart spark in her eyes and find out how much she grew up. He wants to go to Crime Alley and check on Jason. He wants to shake Gordon’s hand and to kiss Barbara’s hair. He wants to feel Selina’s body against his. He wants to understand Damian. He wants to see Dick’s eyes.

He hasn’t seen Dick’s eyes since he came back from time. Batman’s white lenses had left his son’s face sometime between the moment he passed out next to Damian and the moment a neurosurgeon removed a bullet from the inside of his skull. Dick had yet to wake up.

And Bruce hadn’t seen Dick’s eyes in a year.

It’s something that hasn’t happened since that fateful night at Haly’s Circus. Even when they weren’t talking, he always took the time to check on his ward. His son.

He never wanted things to go this way. He has all the money anyone could wish for and more, a position of power, both in one of the biggest companies on earth and in the most famous superhero team in the universe. He’d been trained by the best of the best.

And yet.

And yet he can’t stop his family from ripping to shreds.

The Joker is still loose. He’s got a dozen missed calls on his phone, mostly from Clark. He doesn’t care. Right now, he doesn’t care. He’s tired.

Dick must be tired too. Bruce tries to tell himself that this is the reason he hadn’t woken up yet. He’d been assured by several doctors that the surgery went well. Dick should wake up anytime now, and the confusion and pain will decrease within the next few weeks, leaving only a scar on the back of his head, until that, too, will be hidden behind the thick black hair Bruce hadn’t ruffled affectionately in ages.

Bruce’s hands hover over his son’s unconscious body, as if afraid of touching him. Of breaking him more than he already did. Not for the first time, he wonders what would have happened if he had ensured that the young boy from the circus found a good foster family and left him there. If he hadn’t, with all the vanity of a twenty-four-year-old millionaire, thought he was the only one who could take care of him.

He sighs. He lowers his head once again toward Dick’s face and sees two cloudy blue eyes looking back at him.

He blinks. Tries to control the avalanche of emotions falling upon him. “Hey,” he says, choking on his own voice.

He’s not really expecting an answer, so he’s surprised when Dick opens his dry lips and lets out a small, “Hey. Long time, no see.”

A tear Bruce knows Dick doesn’t even notice forms itself in his son’s eye. Bruce wipes it away gently. “Are you in any pain?” he asks.

“I’m okay,” Dick lies. Bruce doesn’t call him out on it.

“Do you remember what happened?”

Dick goes to shake his head but aborts the movement with a pained jerk. “No,” he says instead.

“Do you want me to tell you?”

Dick lets out a small laugh. “How would you know? You’re a figment of my imagination.”

Bruce suddenly feels very cold. He takes in both the knowledge that Dick doesn’t think he’s real and the implication that hallucinating him is something he’s familiar with.

His hand presses a little more on his son’s face. “I’m here,” he says. “I’m real.”

Dick closes his eyes and another tear escapes one of them. “Don’t. Please.”

“Talk to me. What can I do to convince you?” Bruce feels a pressure building behind his own eyes.

“Please, stop,” Dick repeats. “I can’t. I can’t believe you.”

Bruce takes a deep breath. “Okay, we’ll take all the time you need. You don’t have to believe me now, but you need to calm down.”

Dick is close to hyperventilating now, and Bruce wonders if he should just leave the room and let Alfred take care of him. But that seems too much like running away for his liking, and he’s been away long enough.

“I can’t believe you’re real,” Dick continues, not caring, or perhaps not registering what Bruce said. “I can’t, you’re not. I can’t hope, because what if I wake up and you’re gone? Again?”

Bruce feels his heart shattering into pieces, but he can’t let himself break down. “Breathe, Robin,” he says, immediately wincing when the name passes his lips.

Calling him by a title he hadn’t worn in years probably won’t help Dick’s grip with reality, but he can’t help it. Right now, he can only see a distressed child in front of him. A child who always responded well to this name.

And it seems that some things can’t be erased by time, because Dick gasps and takes a few more deep breaths, calming down. Bruce thinks the worst of it is over. He thinks maybe Dick will fall back asleep, and wake up again in a few hours, less confused this time.

He’s wrong.

Because not a minute later, Dick opens his eyes again, and says, “The real you would be much angrier than that.”

Bruce feels the mass in his throat, the one that appeared at the beginning of the conversation, start to grow again. “What? No, why would I be angry?”

“Let you down,” Dick answers in a way that makes Bruce wish he had never asked. “Disrespected your will. Let Gotham become a mess. Destroyed Batman’s name.”

“You didn’t,” Bruce murmurs. “You didn’t.” When Dick doesn’t seem to calm down, he adds, “You’re a better Batman than I’ll ever be.”

Because this is true. He doesn’t need Alfred of Gordon to tell him what he always knew. Dick is the essence of what Batman should be. He’s the Batman Gotham needs, even if she doesn’t deserve him. And for that reason, Dick shouldn’t have been Batman. He’s perfect, and he’s destroying himself.

Batman had never been a title to pass on, let alone to Dick. Sure, he trusted his son and first sidekick to take the mantle if he was unable to, but he never had wanted him to be Batman. No one but him was supposed to be Batman. Cassandra was the closest to the title, but she wasn’t ready, and he couldn’t let that burden fall on her.

Still, he hadn’t wanted it to fall on Dick, either.

“Why are you saying that?” Dick asks. Bruce can practically see the gears turning in his head. Good. He knows firsthand that Dick is a damn good detective. He will figure this out. “This is not something I believe or fear or want to hear. Why are you saying that?”

“I’m real,” Bruce repeats, and Dick lets out a sob.

“You’re not,” he protests, but Bruce can see his resolve weakening. “You’re not. Tim said, but you…”

He stops. Blinks. A few more tears fall out of his eyes, and Bruce knows his own aren’t dry either. “You’re real. You’re… please, be real.”

Bruce bites the inside of his cheek to keep himself from breaking down. “I’m real,” he chokes. “I promise.”

Dick’s eyes go wide. “What about Damian?” he asks. “Aren’t you angry?”

Bruce sighs. What about Damian? This is a whole different question. The kid is sleeping in his room right now, having finally listened to Alfred, leaving his Batman’s side. He had barely said a word to Bruce.

Bruce has been gone for a year, not by choice, sure, but gone nonetheless, and now he doesn’t know where he fits, between his son in blood and his son in everything else.

Batman and Robin, a bond that can’t be broken. A bond that still exists, he hopes, between himself and Dick.

“I will talk with him,” he says because his relationship with Damian, his complicated feelings about the mere existence of Damian and his anxiety about having to work with him as a Robin, aren’t Dick’s responsibility. They never should have been. “I’m not angry with you.”

Dick blinks again. “My head hurts,” he finally admits.

Bruce’s hand hovers over the morphine drip. “Do you want more painkillers?”

“If I sleep,” Dick asks, “Will you still be there when I wake up?”

Bruce bends down, leaves a kiss on his son’s forehead. “I promise.”

“I don’t believe you,” Dick says. “But thank you, for being here.”

Still, he closes his eyes and his body relaxes a little. Probably as much as it is possible while recovering from brain surgery.

Bruce stays there a long time, his hand still on Dick’s face. He’s broken a lot of promises. But he’s sure of one thing.

He will be here when Dick wakes up again.

He will still be real.

Ending Note: Hope you enjoyed the fic! Many thanks to @ohmytoddhewitt for beta reading!

[boldlyvoid]

Amoreena | chapter seven

Chapter Seven

main summary: Heaven is a real place and it's located exactly 14.6 miles away from the FBI, Quantico Headquarters. Off behind a small park, under a fantastical willow tree surrounded by wildflowers, in every colour young minds can imagine. Don't forget, heaven also comes with angels. Chapter Warnings: major fluff word count: 3.9k From the beginning <3

Spencer wakes up to the sound of Amoreena calling for her mother and the feeling of Y/N’s arms wrapped around his middle, finding her way to being the big spoon during the night.

“Dad? Where’s my mom?” Amoreena calls again from outside Spencer's door.

“She’s in here, but don’t come in yet, give her a minute to wake up,” he calls back, hoping she listens and doesn’t come barging in.

Y/N lets out a deep sigh as she sits up, still naked under the covers from the activities from the night before but not concerned in the slightest. She gets out of bed and grabs some fresh shirts from the closet before finding both their underwear on the floor, tossing them at Spencer and telling him to put everything on.

Once they’re finally dressed she opens the bedroom door and scoops up the little one, bringing her back into the bed with them so they can all cuddle.

“What the heck?” Is all Amoreena can ask, “why are you in here?”

“We had a sleepover,” Y/N explains softly, holding Amoreena closer to her and Spencer snuggles in too. “I’m thinking about moving my stuff into here too, so that me and your dad can share and we won’t wake you up by talking at night.”

“Is that why GG’s dress is hanging up there? Are you getting married?” She was full of questions, as always.

It makes them both laugh, “what if we already got married?” Y/N teases her, poking her side lightly.

She starts to pout, real tears forming in her eyes as she pulls away from them to sit at the foot of the bed, “why would you do it without me?” they both rush to console her, wrapping her up in a group hug.

“Not for real, we were just pretending to be married honey, I promise,” Y/N tries to explain softly, “did you want me to have a wedding?”

She nods softly, “like in Enchanted, but I’m your daughter and you marry Spencer and you can have a big puffy dress and I can get one too, can I be the flower girl?”

“Of course we’ll get married for you, just the three of us can plan something okay?” Y/N compromised, making a reference Spencer didn’t understand.

“We have to do it in New York like in the movie,” Amoreena was very serious, looking at them with a stern gaze.

There was a whole world of movies and music that built Amoreena’s personality that he was going to have to learn, he was going to be spending a lot of late nights on Disney+.

“We’ll find a way,” Y/N agreed before kissing Amoreena’s forehead.

“Okay,” she smiled nice and wide, wiping her tears away and cuddling in-between Spencer and Y/N.

She turned more towards Spencer, placing her head on his chest while Y/N spooned into her. The three of them cuddled up in one knot, and Amoreena was a snuggle bug. She cuddled right in and made a tiny home in his arms and he was going to hold her for as long as she wanted to be held.

Y/N couldn’t stop smiling at him, he’d glance to her every few minutes to see her gaze hadn’t moved; she was so content seeing the little family they made, all together and happy as they snuggled up closer and closer till Amoreena felt like she couldn’t breathe anymore and pushed them both away.

“I need to go feed the chickens,” she whispered, still on Spencer’s chest as Y/N got out of the bed, “would you like to help, dad?”

He kissed her little forehead before she sat up, “I’d love to, can I put some jeans on and meet you downstairs?”

“Sure!” She cheered, jumping off the bed and running out the door. Her feet smacking the hardwood floor, making the floor creak and pop as she marched down the cold wooden steps.

“How are you feeling this morning?” He asks Y/N with a small smile, remembering what happened the night before.

She nodded softly, smiling while she suppressed a laugh, “I feel like a teenager again, like my mom's going to know I lost my virginity the second I see her.”

Spencer laughed too, “you haven’t?”

“I said again,” she laughed again, sitting back down on the bed and laying her head in his lap, “I wouldn’t say I’ve been celibate all this time, but yeah no one’s done that with me in a while, it’s normally just me and these bad boys.”

She put both hands in the air, doing jazz hands as she raised her eyebrows, “I love you,” the words had their own agenda as he said them unconsciously.

“I love you!” She wrapped her hands around his shoulders and pulled him down into a big kiss, making the classic smooch noise as they pulled apart and smiled.

“Can I take you on a date this week? Maybe Thursday night, because you don’t work on Fridays?” he felt nervous as if she wasn’t pretending to be his wife currently like she’d reject him for some ungodly reason.

“Yeah, I’d love that, my mom won't mind doing Amoreena’s bedtime routine, she’d probably love to have a sleepover at their house,” Y/N’s eyes were gleaming at the prospect of spending more time alone with him.

He placed his left hand on her stomach softly, staring at the ring on his finger before letting his eyes trail her body. She was in just a pair of underwear and a shirt that used to be her grandma's, beautiful as ever as the sunrise cast an orange glow over her.

His wife.

“Thank you,” she cut into the moment of silence, “for last night.”

“You don’t have to thank me.”

She got up and sat in his lap then, straddling his hips and holding his face in her hands so she could get a good look at his chocolate eyes, she ran her thumb over his cheeks, kissing the freckle on top of his eyebrow and the tip of his nose gently, “she has your nose.”

Knowing she saw it too made his heart physically burn, it caught fire in his chest and he felt like he couldn’t breathe “yeah?”

“My mom said she looked like a Who when she was born,” she pushed his nose up with her finger like he was a pig, “it’s so perfect and cute.”

“Thank you,” he can’t help but feel emotional.

“Hey,” she teases him again, “It was my turn to say that, so bear with me for a second before I get too emotional at 7 in the morning.”

“Okay,” he whispered, ready to listen intently to how she felt about him.

“You told me something very difficult for you, that was a secret I’m sure no one else knows about, I can tell by the way you panicked last night that this is a serious anxiety you have about never being a father,” her voice was soft as she brushed his hair behind his ears, running her fingers through the curls ever so gently. “You’re a father, hopefully of two”

It made him laugh as a tear trickled down his cheek, pressing his lips together as he listened, not wanting to disrupt all the thoughts she was going to unload on him because it was a ticket into her mind. He was finally learning her feelings and what she thought about him, not just in a fairytale glow, but in the ugly as well.

“If you ever want to talk about her we can,” she changed the subject.

“Maeve was probably a wonderful woman if you loved her enough to wish you had kids with her, she’s technically the reason I have Amoreena, you wouldn’t have donated again without what happened to her,” she made a great point, bringing a positive light to the worst day of his life.

“You’re a wonderful man and I love you very much, being open with me was really appreciated, getting to do what we did last night was very special to me, so thank you,” she smiled softly before kissing him on the lips again.

“Thank you for being the person I can talk to about this stuff, it’s been really scary,” he admitted softly about to cry when they heard the front door slam close.

“And she’s off,” Y/N smiled again, pressing their noses together. “You need to go with her, she’s very impatient.”

“I know,” he smiled. “But I need to tell you that it runs a lot deeper than what you saw last night. I’m a mess in here and it’s not going away overnight because I’ve found my family.”

“I know,” she nodded ever so softly so their noses brushed again. “I am always here to talk, or we can get you a therapist or sign you up for groups, anything you need to feel better, I’m here to assist in making this beautiful brain feel more loved.”

“Thank you,” he whispered again. “So, if I planned a big date night and requested that you wear your best princess dress and meet me at the door for 6, you’d be down?” He teases her.

She couldn’t help but laugh, “sure, cutie, any colour dress do you want me in?”

“I think red would fit the theme I’m thinking of,” saying a little of his plans and not too much, unsure exactly what he wants to do with her first.

She pinched his cheeks as he smiled, “I don’t get any hints?”

“Nope, and I have chickens to feed,” he said, moving her off his lap and getting ready for the day finally.

—

They both sent Amoreena off to school with a hug and a kiss at the bus stop, exchanging I love you’s and saying they’d see her once she got home. Then Spencer kissed Y/N goodbye as she got ready for work, heading to the main house to talk to her mother about Thursday.

He knocked on the front door, being told to come in, he was family now after all.

“Good morning Spencer, would you like some breakfast?” Linda offered with a big smile, exactly like Y/N’s.

“I’d love some,” he gladly followed her into the kitchen, taking a mug of coffee and a homemade cinnamon roll from her. Amoreena already had one this morning before the bus, leaving a single missing spot in the middle of the pan.

“Would you be able to watch over Amoreena on Thursday night so I can take Y/N out on a real date?” He asks with all the confidence in the world, knowing her mother would say yes regardless.

“Oh absolutely!” She beamed, “what were you planning?”

“Can you keep a secret?” He asked before picking up his coffee with his left hand.

“That’s her grandfather's ring,” Linda pointed it out with a smile growing on her face, it was motherly pride if he’s ever seen it, “she finally did it.”

She must have told her mom the plan, her long-time dream of marrying a good person in that field. Someone to have a family with, someone to give Amoreena siblings and all the extra love in the world, and she picked him.

He nodded softly, “last night we got pretend married, and Amoreena got very upset when she learned we did that without her.”

Linda nodded with a soft smile, “they’re attached at the hip, sometimes I think Amoreena is just a clone of her and then I met you.”

He laughed through his nose, eyes wide as he smirked, “well, actually I might be her father.”

Linda sprouted the same expression Y/N had last night when she found out, “huh?”

He sighed, “I donated sperm the month before she got pregnant with Amoreena, my friends said there should be more geniuses in the world and it’s not like I was getting married any time soon.”

Linda just smiled and shook her head with that same sigh of love that must run in the family, she walked over to him and gave him a small hug as he sat at the kitchen table.

“So, Spencer, tell me about yourself?” Linda asked as she sat down beside him with her own coffee and cinnamon roll, getting to know her son-in-law for the first time ever.

He was in there, laughing and bonding with her for over an hour, seeing Y/N drive down the driveway towards work from the kitchen window with a smile. Discussing his ideas for the date, telling her about his family and the dream he always had about running away to a place like this.

“Fate is funny like that, she knows what you need and when you need it,” Bob cut into the conversation, listening from the back door for a few minutes. “you're here for a reason, Spencer.”

He felt like he was on the set of an old movie about family love that always had a happy ending, he didn’t believe that any of it was real. For a second he wondered if he’s been in a coma for the last week, that this was all just a fever dream after crashing his bike on the way to the park, it was all too perfect.

He thanked them for breakfast with a hug, becoming a hugger to fit into her family and he didn’t even mind it. It was nice to be loved truly, not just because they were obligated to, but because they wanted him in their family.

—

His next stop of the day was Penelope’s apartment, he knocked on the door softly and waited patiently for her to answer, smiling wide at the surprise of Spencer behind her door.

“I need your help,” he says before she can even welcome him.

She was still in her robe, a sleep mask over one eye and her hair standing in every direction known to man “what did you do?”

“Nothing, I need a womanly touch for the date I’m planning,” he admitted, turning pink at the embarrassment of coming to her for this.

“What’s the plan?”

“Can I tell you on the way there?”

She raised her eyebrows, “come in and give me a few minutes, you can explain why you’re wearing a ring while I change…”

“For not being a profiler, you sure are good at this,” he avoided her question as he walked into her apartment, sitting right by her bedroom door so he could talk to her through the door.

“It’s a really long story, but essentially her fiancé died when she was 23 so she’s terrified of real weddings and wanted to just tell me she loves me and call me her husband without waiting or making a big fuss about it all,” he explained it as simply as possible. Not sure if he should tell her about the chat he had with Derek. “And we found out I might be Amoreena’s real father anyway.”

She peaked her head out the door, nothing on now and not wanting him to see. It wasn’t like she got naked when she was drunk and shown him everything before, he just laughed as she smiled at him. “If you need help tracking down any other kids, I can do it?”

He felt a little betrayed but he understood, Derek and Penelope had a bond where secrets never slipped out but they did tell each other everyone else's, “he told you?”

“No, I knew you donated because they did a background check into you at the bureau, and I was the one who had to send them the files,” Penelope admitted. “I wanted you to be the one to tell me, but I don’t think you ever would have.”

He shook his head softly, “I just wanted a family one day however I could get one, and when Rossi met Joy I knew it could bring me the same kind of happiness he has with her and Kai."

“You’re going to be a wonderful dad Spencer,” she tried to not get all teary-eyed as she stood behind the door with nothing on, “anyway continue?”

She slipped back into the room and the two of them continued to yell their gossip back and forth through the door before she finally walked out in her most Penelope outfit to date, “and we’re taking my car. It’s top-down weather, finally.”

It’s not that she was a bad driver, it’s just she barely followed any rules. She drove too fast and passed people when she shouldn’t and it stressed Spencer out, but he was too in love to really be bothered by it today. Taking an hour-long journey to Richmond, pulling into the Edgar Allen Poe Museum.

He was a member here, paying them every month to take care of the grounds and the cats, even tracking down some rare pieces from Poe’s collection to donate to them. He was their favourite customer and patron, and they were very excited for him to finally introduce his new love to one of his favourite places ever.

He rented out the Enchanted Garden for Thursday night, being trusted there alone after hours and granted a key to lock up before he left. Penelope and he picked out lights and blankets, what kind of dinner they’d have and drinks.

“So I’ll make sure your picnic basket is all ready and here waiting for you to arrive,” Penelope planned, reading through the list of things she was going to do to help on Thursday afternoon. “What kind of wine does she like?”

“Oh,” Spencer took a second to think, she might want some wine but she’s also hoping to get pregnant, it could help but it could be a hindrance, he didn’t know how to reply.

“Does she not drink?”

“Can you keep a secret?” The second time he asked that question this morning.

“No fucking way,” she whispered, smacking his arm. “Already?”

“No, I’m not sure, we only tried yesterday,” he feels the anxiety in his chest as he explains it, “It doesn’t work that fast which is why I don’t know if we should.”

“Believe me, wine is a good baby-making tool,” she smiled. “I’ll add some anyway and if she does, she does, if she doesn’t oh well, you know where I live.”

It was so easy with Penelope, she understood everything he did without questioning him. Rooting for him and his future family behind closed doors, always trying to get him with someone in the years she knew him, wanting him to get all that “sweet, sweet loving” Derek raved about.

“Do you think she’ll like this? Be honest.” His anxiety slipped back up his throat and past his vocal cords.

Penelope wrapped him up in a big hug, remembering the statistic that people with Autism and anxiety sometimes relaxing better when held with a certain pressure applied. It worked every time.

“She loves you, you wouldn’t be trying for a baby or wearing that ring if she didn’t,” reassuring as always.

“Do you know anything about Taylor Swift?”

It makes her laugh as she pulls back, “why?”

“She’s Y/N and Amoreena’s favourite person on the earth, I know nothing about celebrities, you know that, and I was thinking about getting them tickets or something this summer if she’s doing anything?” He was desperate to do anything to make his girls smile. “I need a Taylor Swift crash course, is there a new Taylor Swift fan for dummies book?”

“Spencer Reid, do I have news for you,” Penelope wrapped her arm around him once again as she rocked him back and forth with glee, “Rossi’s stepdaughter is her is a socialite in New York and one of miss Swifts friends… let's see what we can do.”

And with that, they left the museum with Penelope's arm still wrapped around him as they went back to her car, listening to Taylor Swift while she spat facts out to Spencer, helping him learn everything he could for his wife and kid.

—

He was the only one home when Amoreena got off the bus, running into his arms and giving him a big hug, “Dad!” She cheered the second he held her, kissing the top of her head as he carried her back to the house. “Where is mom?”

“She’s out buying a new dress for a date we’re going on,” he couldn’t help but over exaggerate his voice when he talked to her, it made it more magical for her little world. “How was school?”

“Awesome!” She swooned, “we started our fathers day presents early cause we won't have class after next week.”

He playfully gasps, stopping abruptly in his tracks to look at her in shock, “You can’t tell me anything about it, they’re supposed to be surprise gifts!”

“I know,” she laughed wrapping her arms around his neck and leaning against his shoulder while they walked, “I just wanted you to know one is coming, you always tell me about your gifts early, like at the museum.”

“Well, thank you for telling me,” he kissed her soft forehead softly before smiling.

She was so smart, her mother had raised her to be the most caring and considerate child. She picked up on everything, she wanted to please everyone, she was the sweetest ever.

“Do you have any homework tonight?”

“Nope! Can we watch a movie?”

He just held her cheek to his in a hug while they walked, “of course my sweet Amoreena, what would you like to watch?”

“It’s a surprise,” she whispered, struggling out of his arms and to the ground before running towards the house without him.

He walks in to see her standing in front of the tv with the remote, flipping through the channels and opening Netflix. Going to her mom's profile, down to the watchlist and clicking on the Taylor Swift Reputation Tour before taking off up the stairs to go get something.

“We made this a few months ago,” it was a piece of paper that she handed to him. “It’s the rules for when mom finally got a date, you’re her boyfriend right?”

He opened the folded lined paper, “I am,” he smiled.

Boy/girlfriend rules:

Must be royalty of some kind (or smart like a wizard)

Has to know all the words to Taylor swift’s songs

Likes to read books all the time

Have to like all the candy Amoreena doesn’t so that someone can eat the leftovers from her Halloween candy bag.

Has to be able to name all the Disney princesses

Must like cats. No if’s and's or butts.

It made him laugh, every rule was clearly Amoreena’s idea and Spencer must have ticked off all the boxes if she’s calling him dad already.

“You have to learn all the words to Taylor Swift, then you’ll be her boyfriend for real,” Amoreena informed him. “We have to follow the rules.”

“Well then, put the captions on so I can sing along,” Spencer compromised.

She hugged him with a big smile “you’re the best dad in the world.”

“You’re the best daughter,” he whispered as he held her back. “You make every day better by just being here.”

“So do you,” she replied before kissing his cheek softly and settling onto the couch beside him. “Thank you for wanting to be my dad.”

“I wouldn’t want to be anyone else’s.”

tag list: @shemarmooresfedora @spencers-dria @spookyspence @reidsfish @manuosorioh @mochionly @samuel-de-champagne-problems @jswessie187

[stxleslyds]

you know how dc keeps forcing this sudden "we're a family" narrative out of nowhere? I'd love batfam content but years of hurt among them make the recent content seem unearned.

bc you know more about dick and jason than the others, how do you think they would realistically become family to each other, or would it even be in character for them to be the "bros" they're written as now?

Oh anon, this question is amazing, I love it! I saw it when I woke up and since then my brain has been brewing this answer, I was thinking about it as I brushed my teeth and as I was making breakfast, and now I am ready to give you the answer, I hope you enjoy reading it as much as I enjoyed thinking/writing about it!

DC keeps forcing the wrong relationships, and they keep forcing the wrong centre of this supposed family, they make it out to be the Bat-Family when in reality the Bat (Bruce) should have never been invited to this party.

This is why I give you the… Dick-Family!

Oh yeah baby, I am going there. Dick is the centre of this “family”, he is the guy who is actually connected with everyone, he has been around for so long and he has been present when almost all of the remaining characters were introduced! Bruce might have come first but that guy has nothing on Dick Grayson.

Dick has cared and loved for everyone in this family in a true and beautiful way, no matter how much fanon and DC try to tell us otherwise. This man was an amazing son to Bruce and Alfred (my love for Alfred and Dick is brought to you by @hood-ex), a fantastic brother to Jason, Tim and Cass as well as a phenomenal father/older brother to Damian.

Dick Grayson is the centre of this whole thing, and thanks to DC now being an Omniverse I will be able to explain my line of thoughts. But first let me clear some ideas up.

The way I see it Jason would only get along good enough with Dick. I am not here for Jason and Tim having brunch together (honestly, Lobdell, what were you thinking), Jason never cared for Tim, and then writers that didn’t know how the Red Hood worked made him try to kill Tim so, to me, that relationship is non-existent, Jason doesn’t really perceive Tim (yet).

Jason and Damian, listen, I know that there is this fanon theory that Jason knew and cared for Damian while he was in the League, but that is just fanon talk and it doesn’t really fit in canon either. Jason wasn’t really capable of doing much other than fight, and after he was put in the Lazarus Pit he either had to leave because Ra’s wanted to kill him or Talia took him to the All-Castle. So, Jason’s only real interactions with Damian would be when Jason was written as a crazy, blood thirsty dude that actually tried to harm a child. So, him and Damian wouldn’t really have a good relationship (yet).

Jason and Cass… that’s just a no. Jason and Barbara, I mean Barbara was older than Dick when she first met Jason, so they wouldn’t have much of a relationship.

Now, lets move on to how I will make the Dick-Family work.

Dick (bless him) actually talks and listens to people, unlike Bruce, so the change would start there. Let’s set the timeline, I will stand right after the events of Under the Red Hood. Bruce just chose saving Joker over letting Jason kill the Joker and the building they were in exploded.

Batman keeps on being himself (trash) and Jason, having survived the explosion, moves on to keep on building his empire. He really wants to control the drug trade in Gotham, so he works on that, he slowly but surely takes his place as a drug lord again and is a constant pain in Black Mask’s ass.

While Jason is doing that, Dick is trying to put together his life after Bludhaven was attacked with Chemo. Let’s say that Bludhaven isn’t completely erased from the map but he does have to leave so the city can be re-built. He goes to Gotham, where the Red Hood works.

Let’s say that Alfred told Dick who was under the Red Hood, so Dick being a good brother goes looking for Jason. Their first interaction out of the mask wouldn’t be nice, Jason barely remembers his life before the pit and he really is convinced that Dick is the absolute worst.

But then Jason being a nosy man would make an appearance, for some reason, let’s say that he hacks into the Batcave and when he does that he finds some footage… The footage in question would be the one which shows Bruce punching Dick and sort of blaming him for Jason’s death. (Oh yeah, I am going there). The footage will make a memory come to mind, Dick taking Jason on a skying trip.

So, the next time that Dick and Jason see each other is because Jason went looking for Dick and here is where these two actually talk. The way I see it, Dick is more flexible with the no killing rule, he has worked many times with people that are villains or that just have different ways of doing things. So, I think that he would understand where Jason’s coming from with his ideas. As they begin to understand one another Jason begins to recover more and more memories from before the Pit.

They get together once a week and they chat about life as well as vigilante stuff. They become friends.

At the same time Dick is also very good friends with Tim and also acts like the amazing big brother he is with him. They chat, they sometimes work together and one day they come across a very complicated situation involving a new drug being introduced in Gotham.

Dick would call Jason and now both of them and Tim are reunited in a safe house working together so this new drug doesn’t fall in the wrong hands. Jason and Tim wouldn’t really like each other. Both of them are there for Dick and because they have to get the job done.

That’s how I see Dick forming the Dick-Family unconsciously. Hell, I will introduce Barbara now. Do you guys remember that in UtRH Barbara was mad with Bruce and didn’t want to work with him but she was still in contact with Dick? Well, I am using that so it can fit my narrative.

Dick, Jason and Tim need more intel so Dick calls Oracle (real Oracle) and because Barbara trusts Dick she works with them.

Here is where it gets interesting, through Barbara, Dick meets Cass, through Tim he meets Stephanie. You see that Dick’s connections are leading him to form a group of people. Cass and Stephanie are trained by Babs and Dick and they become the new Batgirls.

As all of that keeps developing Jason and Dick become “partners in crime” they help each other, they start building a brotherly relationship again. Although Jason refuses to say that out loud.

Then comes in Damian, a difficult child if there has ever been one but he has Bruce so Dick doesn’t have to jump in that fast… right?

Oh brother! Bruce is dead (omg what would we do? Battle for the cowl maybe? No!). with Bruce gone there is only one person who can take his place and everyone knows it has to be Dick.

Dick would feel a lot of things as he is taking Bruce’s place as Batman but he has a group of people ready to back him up (Alfred, Jason, Tim, Babs, Cass, Steph), and he also has to take care of Damian, he is a child and with his father gone then maybe his mother would want to take him back to the League of Assassins, Dick obviously doesn’t want that so he talks to Tim and tells him that he sees him as his equal and that he has a plan to make Damian stay and it involves making Damian his new Robin.

Tim would obviously be sad and a little hurt, but he understands Dick’s decision because they talked about it and Dick actually took the time to explain why he was doing what he was doing (really DC half of the problems you guys come up could be fixed in seconds if people would only take some time to just TALK!).

Dick and Damian work as Batman and Robin and Dick starts assuming the position of his father. They would live with Alfred in the penthouse and maybe Tim will join them from time to time (when he wasn’t busy with Young Justice/Teen Titans stuff). Slowly Dick and Damian will become the Dynamic Duo that we love today.

So, Dick would have his own Robin, Oracle (who is also managing her own team with Black Canary and (why not) the Batgirls), Red Robin and Red Hood working with him if he needs them. They are always a call away. Jason is the most difficult to reach and he will only involve himself in that kind of drama if its about controlling the drug trade or scaring the living shit out of some very shady people.

So, Red Hood wouldn’t be working with the new (and improved) Batman but Jason would hang out with Dick sometimes.

From there they build up. Dick renovates Arkham Asylum and makes it work they way that it is supposed to work. He might also recruit Catwoman when he needs someone really sneaky, they have known each other for so long, I bet Selina loves Dick, she would certainly help him out.

But as all things do, this happy and well-connected Dick-Family is disrupted when Bruce comes back, he inserts himself slowly back into his role as Batman and as he does that Dick starts to move away from it.

But Dick’s connections are strong and well cared for, so, even when he goes back to Bludhaven and starts fresh (again) as Nightwing those connections remain. Oracle still gives him intel, Robin and Red Robin come over to Bludhaven to patrol, maybe they even have their own rooms at Dick’s place.

With Bludhaven functioning again, all of the terrible people that were working there also come back, maybe some of them never left and they have been corrupting the city from its very core. So, when Jason tells Dick that he would like to expand his operations to Bludhaven, Dick says yes, as long as Jason keeps him updated on his work and also lets him know what is going on.

I think it works! What do you guys think so far?

From then on with the whole Dick-Family being connected and strong I think they can actually act and solve their problems as a family. All those arcs that didn’t work very well because Bruce was in the middle of it being a jerk, I think they will work if Dick is at the centre of it. Let’s say that Bruce hid the fact that Joker knows their identities and all that, with such a strong family the second that the Joker tries to manipulate Jason into believing that he created him, Dick will come out of the shadows and shut that bullshit down. If Joker tries to do something to the Circus, then the Birds of Prey and the Robins will be there in seconds helping Dick.

The Court of Owls, those little shits wouldn’t stand a chance against this team, this force of nature! Jason would be the one working from afar because you know my boy wouldn’t be subjected to the “no-killing” rule but if he does it, he has to do it away from the children (Damian) and away from Cass, if he doesn’t want to know real trouble. (He probably arranged those things with Dick a long time ago and he is happy with it).

Now, please forgive me but for angst reasons I will actually let the events of, Batman Incorporated #8, Forever Evil, Nightwing #30 and Spyral run its course.

Let me explain, after Damian’s death Dick holds the Dick-Family together, as well as Bruce because he is amazing like that, but then after Dick supposedly dies, things change just a little bit. Jason would retreat back to his own corner because the only thing attaching him to the Dick-Family was Dick but he would also keep his eyes open and he might also have a direct line with Oracle if things go south.

Aside from Jason, I do see the others working on keeping their connections intact. When Damian eventually returns the land of the living, I can see all of them coming together even more because that’s what Dick would have wanted.

And then Dick will come back from Spyral and here is where the Dick-Family will show the “Bat-Family” why its superior to it in every aspect possible.

The Dick-Family will notice that something must have happened, Dick would never play dead and leave them like that, but Dick loves Bruce and he doesn’t want to tell them the truth, Bruce has no memories now and his family doesn’t deserve that kind of drama BUT Jason and Tim are suspicious, they know Dick at this point and they trust him so they firmly believe that he is hiding something to protect someone. And here is where life repeats itself. Let’s review the Batcave’s footage, yes, I did it again, I just love the fact that Bruce has footage of himself being the absolute worst to his kids, how does DC not use it! Anyway, Tim and Jason find the footage from the events of Nightwing #30 and suddenly the Dick-Family have their “Dick defence squad” jackets on and they are ready to party.

After all that Bruce eventually gets his memories back and he is held accountable for his actions. Also, around this time the events of Robin War would have already happened so Duke is also introduced. Dick lets him join and all that, and then Duke and Cass become besties and they work together.

And yeah, as Rebirth comes closer the Dick-Family would be more united than ever.

The end.

That is how I would have done it. But this way is slow, and DC wouldn’t be able to monetize it as much as they would want.

Jason wouldn’t be giving hugs and calling everyone their brother or sister, he will only get along with Dick and he would be professional with everyone else.

Tim and Damian would get along but they wouldn’t go for ice cream together on a sunny day. Steph and Damian would and so would Cass and Tim or Cass and Duke.

Oracle would work with Dick and the others as a side thing because her main thing would be the Birds of Prey, this time with Helena too.

Alfred would spend his time with Bruce but he would also be very aware of Dick and his influence on everyone around them. Bruce eventually would be integrated to the Dick-Family because Dick is a sweetheart but Dick would also make Bruce follow his rules, Dick is a little bean but he is also the most badass person in the room (whichever room) so you better listen to what he has to say.

The Dick-Family would be something that grows silently and doesn’t need a “Joker War” in order for them to be there for each other, they would try their best each step of the way and they will talk things out when mistakes are made.

This is the way that I see this family dynamic working.

I would even go as far as to say that Talia can be part of the Dick-Family because she is connected to three people, Dick, Damian and Jason.

Dick is the person with most connections in the DC Universe, the Titans, the Justice League, Deathstroke, they all have connections to this treasure of a man. If he needs help in Gotham or Bludhaven then he can call people from the “first circle”, if things are beyond a “street level” threat them he can call the Titans and if shit really hits the fan, Clark and the others are a call away.

Anyway, this was unnecessarily long, I am sorry about it but I am also not because I really don’t know how to answer your question without going on a long rant.

In conclusion the Bat-Family doesn’t work and sadly it wouldn’t work no matter how much they force it. These people don’t have connections, Bruce is not able to make connections between people. And DC has erased entire relationships that Dick used to have. I mean, they got rid of Dick and Tim being close brothers just so they could give us a shitty brunch between Tim and Jason? Only yesterday we saw a true and beautiful interaction between Dick and Damian.

DC is handling the “Bat-Family” in all the worst possible ways. It just doesn’t work.

They should have used Dick all those years ago and they shouldn’t have destroyed Jason’s characterization with Lobdell’s ideas.

So, sadly, my dear anon, I don’t see the Bat-Family as a in character thing for any of these people as they are written currently, but I hope that you enjoyed my version of it. May the Dick-Family bring everyone who reads about it a little joy!

[bunchofstraydogs]

Dazai Osamu in a relationship

Just a lil warning before you proceed: dis a chonky one, kay?

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Depending on why Dazai is in a relationship affects how he will act with his partner.

If Dazai is curious about them, enough to enter the relationship,

it will last at best a handful of months, at worst about 2 weeks. Enough to get to know them, test them out in terms of reaction, values, honesty and morality, and get bored of them. Thus leading to him braking up with the person or, if he predicts that the person would react badly and cause a scene, get them to break up with him. But even that is dubious because i doubt Dazai would make the relationship official. He would probably just act as if they're dating, leading the partner to believe they actually are without having to verbally confirm anything, and then as soon as he loses interest, pulls a now-you-see-me-now-you-don't and disappears with little to no notice. Hey, he never said they were dating, he calls everyone Belladona, the fault is that person's for being delusional. Yes, he is an asshole, what did you expect of Dazai?

But if Dazai is in love?? Unrecognizable.

I will make a separate headcanon(? whatever these are I'm writing) on what i think a person should be like to sweep Dazai of his feet, but now i want to concentrate on what he would be like in such a relationship.

Is it possible for Dazai to fall in love? Absolutely. He loved Odasaku and Ango, perhaps not romantically, but he's definitely capable of love. People like him- aware of the world's cruelty, dealing with demons and guilt, roaming the world for the sole reason that they haven't died yet, hoping to find something worthwhile they can feel the need to be selfish about and call theirs; don't fall in love, they crash desperately. It takes a lot for them to feel those emotions, but when they do, they can never really let them go.

He would try to act as he usually does in public and try approaching the subject of his trepidation and disarray in many different ways. Distancing himself and going as far to actively avoid them would just come back and bite him in his boney ass. To effectively avoid someone, you need to know their schedule, hobbies, interests, habits, etc. And having learned that would just constantly remind him of them, they'd never leave his mind. He'd look on the clock, see the time and know that they'll be in that specific class because he knows their whole curriculum and class schedule/ at the grocery because they're surly out of their favourite snack/ doing black laundry and yes, he knows unnecessary details about them as well. After that disastrous failure, he comes back running and commences new ways to handle that person. These beta testings are for him as much as they are for them. Just how much and what exactly does he feel for that person, what buttons can he push and which ones he doesn't want to.

When i say Dazai in love would be unrecognizable, i mean it. Not superficially, where everyone can see it, but where it matters.

After doing his best to rail in the unfamiliar feelings under control, going as far as using some of Mori's techniques, the realization of the situation he's found himself in hits him hard.

He comes back as if nothing happened.

The deadpan that person gives him and a "Are you done with your bullshit or do you need some more time to brood about issues you made with yourself?" He doesn't even blink, "Oh, my Belladona! Does that mean you've missed me? Were you worried about me as well??"

All of this was said in your typical, Dazai maniac style, the only difference is that he actually wants an answer. He wants to hear the confirmation, in whatever form it may come- he can read between the lines and body language, just give him something to work with. He's desperate.

While the public Dazai persona won't change, his inner musings and his approach to the love interest will.

Osamu will, sometimes sneakily, usually not so subtly, immerse himself into their daily life. Get them accustomed and used to his presence. What this will do is cause a sense of familiar coexistence, that of people living together; make the person unconsciously continue to include him in their activities; learn to depend on him (not in a unhealthy, yandere way, but if their car brakes down or they're feelinh unsafe, Dazai will be the first person they feel the urge to call) because Dazai can be reliable and he will be reliable for that special person. He will also be the first person they share good news with as well, because if someone is always there for and with you, it's only natural.

Make no mistakes, Dazai is transparent only when he wants to be.

The reasons he does this is because 1) he wants to gauge their reaction to his great interest in them, 2) mask his subtle advances which are the most important part of integrating himself into their life, 3) to get that person in the position where he needs them to be for him to move on to the next phase of his plan.

Now, i may have said plan, but that's a somewhat loose term since what he'll do next depends on their reaction. He definitely has a rough outline of the whole thing in his head, but he's also adaptable and ready to react accordingly to whatever they may throw his way.

[I will be using l/i or LI for "love interest" bc I'm tired of writing that person or whatever, okay? Good.]

Once his l/i made effort to go out of their way for him or commit any type of love language, basically:

act of service- pay for his bills, massage his shoulders, buy crab based food or alchohol he really likes for their own fridge so that he can have it when he's over (often) even if they don't like those things especially then

words of affirmation- thank you Dazai, how was your sleep?, please take better care of yourself i can't help you if you're not making an effort

physical touch- ruffle his hair, lean on him when tired, hold his hand or wrist because it's crowded and it would be a pain to search for you Dazai

gift giving- "I noticed you were running out of bandages", "I bought you food, figured your lost case would forget to eat", "saw this mackerel, reminded me of you^^" "BELLADONA, NO >:("

quality time- spending nights with him because he has insomnia, playing games at the arcade, drive around town run from the cops

He would be overwhelmed. In the best way possible. He'd feel overwhelmingly good and pleasant and warm and worried.

He didn't feel like this, ever.

Not even with Odasaku and Ango. They were probably his first friends, but that's the thing. They didn't make his heart race, they didn't throw him into panic attacks, they didn't overwhelm him, they didn't keep him up at night because he couldn't get them out of his head or completely monopolise his mind during the day.

He gets panic attacks.

A lot of them, actually. Usually he can fake being fine, but sometimes he hyperventilates and can't breathe and all that he can smell is the blood on his hands and his chest is as hollow as l/i's eyes. He knows what can happen. They can and will be used against him. Hell, it could even be an accident. He is vulnerable just because they exist and he can't do shit about it.

He could do his thing: pull some strings, have them move to another country and never speak to each other ever again. He has the power, but he lacks the strength. He could do it, but he doesn't want to. His thumb won't press the numbers, his voice died out, his mind went blank.

The wind blows and it carries their scent with it. The bells ring and it's their laughter that resonates within. His bandages ruffle and it's the warmth of their touch he feels. He's dying, but he's not just ready yet to leave. Hopefully, Odasaku will patiently keep a seat for him.

That was what gave him away, actually.

That's when Ranpo realised, with zero doubt, that Dazai Osamu is in love.

Dazai could be going on and on about suicide.

Enter l/i.

"I found an amazing tree yesterday with really sturdy branches. I wanted to test them out today, but i promised l/i I'd go to the new bakery with them today and who would they go with if i die?? Unacceptable!"

Ranpo: "A new bakery? I'll happily take your place."

"UNACCEPTABLE!!"

With every panic attack he feels stranded on an island in the sea of death.

He's exhausted. For the first time he finally wants to escape alive. Then they walk in and the storm in the sea moves to his heart. And into his stomach and his hands and his knees.

"I'm here for you, Osamu. Everything is going to be fine."

His insomnia goes by a different name now.

It still keeps him up at night and makes him restless.

But this time, when he fills his nth glass of whiskey for the night, when the TV is muted and the trafic quiet, when he can hear their breathing beside him in their shared bed, he raises the glass to hope for the halcyon days.

●

Fucking finally. You think you're exhausted, you waste of bandages?? I have a final today I'm going to fail and actually wrote about your musky ass. You try doing that with my brain.

Hope you guys like it and if you made it this far, here's a cup of ☕ or 🍵, whichever you prefer. I wrote him as i see and envision him. Hope it all makes sense. He's a complicated character, but he is still human and he is not immune to emotions.

Have a good one~☆

I will probably come up with more things for him, because i doubt i covered everything, but for now this shall do.