#wtf dc

[glitter-stained]

The average gothamite dies twice factoid is a statistical mistake. Jason Todd, who keeps dying and coming back to life, is an outlier and shouldn't have been counted

[lettersfromaplatypus]

So apparently Jason Todd died AGAIN but then wasn’t actually dead or got revived or something AGAIN and I just need to mark this occasion of watching the DC fandom go through the five stages of grief and then recover all within about 48ish hours

[fenrir-wolf-of-gotham]

WTF JARRO ISN'T SOME DUMB FUCKING FANDOM THING!?! ITS FUCKING CANON!?!

WHY!?! HOW!?! WHAT!!! WHO IS RESPONSIBLE FOR THIS!?!

[fluffynicoopriv]

They killed Jason again??? OH, WHAT THE FUCK!??

[periwinkle-the-11th]

every once in a while i find out about something that is apparently canonical in the dc comics and just have to pause and WTF

[snakeredbirdbatkatana]

Fuck Mirage and Tarantula also daughter of Acheron just fuck all that I wish the hunters of Artemis existed in that universe cause let me tell you I would be sending a god damn Iris message.

We don't kill people shut up Batman fucking hell

(Tried to leave that vague I don't recommend looking any of that up if you know you know but super triggering wouldn't recommend yah)

[0vergrowngraveyard]

there are so many things i dislike about the harley quinn show (it’s a miracle i actually finished it) but the extreme oversexualization of nightwing has me pissed off.

[nightwingsgypsyrep]

*taps microphone* is this thing on? Okay…

🎤 THIS IS A REMINDER THAT ALL OF THE ROBINS ARE SMART, GENIUSES IN FACT. THEY ARE IN A FAMILY OF DETECTIVES. THATS LIKE THEIR WHOLE THING. ALL OF THE ROBINS (AND THE REST OF THE BATFAM TOO) ARE CLEVER, STRATEGIC, AND CAPABLE, NOT JUST TIM. (No hate to my boy Tim, though. I love Tim.) YES, EVEN THAT ONE. Thank you. 🎤

[definitelysome1]

Tim (with a sigh): it’s my birthday today…

Jason: yeah, I know. I put a gift on your dining table this morning

Tim: ?!??!!??????!?

Jason: why the fuck do you look so confused?

Tim: no one has remembered my birthday since I was seven. I don’t even tell people my birthday anymore because they aren’t going to remember anyway

Jason: ?!!?!???!???

Jason: what the actual fuck

Tim: what?

Jason: not even goldie?? Or cas? Or Steph???

Tim: oh. Well, Dick always gets the date wrong and Steph never asked. I assume it’s because she thinks I don’t want to celebrate because no one ever tries to.

Jason: and Cas?

Tim: I think she knows, but she’s always been away on my birthday

Jason: what about your team? The speedster and the supers? Don’t they remember???

Tim: I’ve never told them

Jason: I-

Jason: did Bruce ever officially adopt you, or are you still emancipated?

Tim: he was going to, but then he disappeared and we never talked about it again, why?

Jason: I’m adopting you and then we’ll celebrate 10 birthdays to make up for the ones you’ve missed.

Tim:???!??!???

[glitter-stained]

Hear me out: RHATO but all the main characters are in character and the elements of plot that are out of their control happen to them and they react in character however any time the pull of their actual personality and abilities drags them away from the bare bones of the plot outline, Scott Lobdell in a bad alfred pennyworth disguise arrives with a shotgun and forces them to follow the narrative with eldritch writer ex machina magic. Eventually the characters unionize to rebel against him and everyone explodes. The story ends with an image of a RHATO comics with a burning crater in the middle and a hand picking it up as a mysterious voice says "I wonder how this will affect the sales."

My rendition of Lobdell in Pennyworth disguise:

[luminesick]

Damian, with red puffy eyes: You too?

Tim, with red puffy eyes: *raises a brow* Yes?

Damian has severe pollen allergies. Tim was high.

[batsandbirdsandothers]

hi love your ghost!jason au its so creative but I would wonder how alive!jason would react to finding out about dicks hallucinations

ANSWER: tsundere!jason (aka Jason trying to respect dick’s independence/space but also freaking out)

Dick’s hallucination btw

[fluffynicoopriv]

Whoever allowed this comic to egzist should be fucking FIRED

[dickgraysonmybeloved]

Bruce, High on pain killers: I hate to tell you this, but one of you is adopted

The Batfam: …

Dick: .. only one?

[ahfrickenfrick]

nightwing being hurt in the field, and over comms he can’t get out what was wrong, nearly in shock, and jason puts on his best batman™️ voice and says “robin, report.”

and it snaps dick out of it enough to say concussion, possible broken ribs, and a gash in his side.

no one talks about it, and then a year later, damian does the same thing to tim

[prlssprfctn]

I will forgive DC for not using All-Blades stuff on Jason, only if they give me a comedy little run, where the family finds out that he is a fucking chosen one, because the half of the world tries to reach for his help in magic stuff, which he ignores — so they are forced to beg Bruce to affect his son, somehow.

Bruce: Hey, John. Long time no see. What happened?

John Constantine, tired as fuck: I need you to ask Jason to pick the goddamn phone.

Dick: Is he wanted in LA, too?

John Constantine: Wanted? Guy is having a fucking blast. Do you know how many people need the Chosen One's assistance?

Damian — who actually knows it, so he is not surprised — scoffing: Todd? Assistance?

Tim, who knows as much as Bruce and Dick, which means nothing: Jason? THE CHOSEN ONE?

Bruce, catching Jason near the fridge in three in the morning: Jason? When were you going to tell us that you were chosen to... restore the balance between good and bad, and had magical swords?

Jason, chewing on dry cereals while skimming through the book: Like what, was it hard?