#? Ig?

[yourlocalbadgerscales]

Sirius: You know what I definitely should have done as a kid? I should have just scared everyone in the church I was baptised in by hissing and yelling in Latin as soon as I touched the water. That would have been sick as fuck. Sirius: Unfortunately, two-month old Sirius Black had no way of learning Latin… Peter: You could have just downloaded Duolingo, you know. Sirius: As a two-month old? I don’t think so. And I don’t think Duolingo teaches Latin, anyways. Peter: Oh, I know that. What I meant is you could have just not done your lessons, and then you could just have waited for Duo to arrive at the church and creep the fuck out of everyone. Sirius: Sirius: Why, you sick and twisted motherfucker. Regulus: *lips twitching* “Ahh, help, the Devil himself has arrived! Everyone stand back!” James: *wheezing* “Be gone, you sick, green Devil! Be gone, I say!” Sirius: *wheezing* Remus: I am surrounded by maniacs. Lily: Indeed. You are all mental, you know that, right?

[countjortula]

thinking about matt stealing some random person's digital camera and taking like a billion pictures of mello doing the most mundane shit

[bikefuckersoftheworldunite]

celestino vietti being clumsy in parc fermé at le mans 2019

[I quickly converted mp4 to gif online so if anyone wants to gif it properly then 🙏🙏]

[dualityofagemini]

OK fine hear me out

Pit fighter vi and enforcer caitlyn

[ptr-sqloint]

knight!

[some-siren]

Ok ok wait I'm rewatching the very beggining of ep 5 when Aziraphale talks about the 1965 doctor who annual and just

Aziraphale: "The 1965 Annual was indeed never printed, *looks at Crowley*, due to problems at the BBC"

Crowley:

Crowley, what happened in september 1965 at the BBC..?

[some-internet-stranger]

The sages! (and Link)

If there's one thing that I really love about tears of the kingdom, it's that you're no longer alone.

Breath of the wild really makes you feel the lonliness, everything is so big and so empty and quiet.

In tears of the Kingdom that's no longer the case, you have the sages with you at all times and you fight together and its Just ah. Very nice. Me Like it a lot

[umayashla]

posting my fave two kon drawings in this blog too

[nervouslywaitingforlife]

Behold, twst memes be up on ye.

[mysterycitrus]

gay people from 2003 >>>>>

[orpheuslament]

Ode to the Airport, Dante Émile

[lunart1cc]

been thinking about cabinet beasts lately

[isjasz]

[Day 194]

have been losing my mind over math all day so i decided to draw them also losing their minds over math 👍

[punnifullife]

Request from @wafflesandd1ck for an evil starfire request. I wouldn't say "evil"-evil, but this was if she was either mind-controlled/under a hallucinogen (like robin was in that episode "Haunted") but she sees everyone as enemies or something. idk. And I couldn't decide on what he was saying at the end, BUT i know my girl could body all them if she didn't hold herself back 👍

[yaolmao]

wowwww you’re so scary

[dinodaweeb]

Deadly Indifference | one-shot

Deadpool X M!Reader

tw: swearing, mentions of sew a slide thoughts (from both tbh)

Summary: Deadpool wants you to show emotion. (And bugs the crap out of you.)

You sat tied to a chair, remarkably composed despite the circumstances. It’s been your third time getting kidnapped this week and it’s only Tuesday. The man who kidnapped you must’ve died already because a man in red and black walked through the door. He mimed the motion of up and down that you felt too familiar to notice.

“Hey there, buddy,” Deadpool chimed cheerfully, pacing around you. The ropes that tied your wrists to the chair felt surprisingly loose.“You know, most people would be sweating their balls off right about now. But, you’re just chillin’. I like that.”

You glanced up at him with a mild shrug, a gesture that only seemed to fuel Deadpool’s curiosity.

He’s a chatterbox.

“I gotta admit,” Deadpool continued, leaning in close with an exaggerated whisper, his mouth touching your ear. “I’m kinda into this whole ‘I don’t give a crap if Deadpool kills me’ vibe you’ve got going on. It’s refreshing. It’s… kinda hot.”

You raised an eyebrow, your expression betraying a hint of amusement. What is he even saying?

“Are we gonna do this or what?” you asked, your voice flat.

Deadpool stepped back, putting a hand to his chest in mock offense. “Wow, straight to the point! I like it. No foreplay, just bam, let’s get this show on the road. Alright, let’s see if I can make you squeal.”

“Good luck with that,” you replied dryly.

“Okay, tough guy,” Deadpool muttered, starting to circle you with exaggerated steps. “You know, most people are all ‘Oh no, Deadpool, please don’t hurt me! I have a family!’” He gave a side eye (somehow?) through the mask. Or they’ll say ‘No, I haven’t closed my tabs and my web browser history isn’t deleted!’ But you, you’re just sitting there like you’re waiting for your Uber Eats.”

“I did order some food before I got kidnapped,” you replied. “It might be waiting outside.”

Deadpool paused, tilting his head. “What did you get?”

“Chimichangas,” you said with a faint hunger in your eyes.

Deadpool’s eyes widened behind his mask. “You’re serious?”

“Yep. Thought I’d try them out.”

Deadpool’s posture relaxed, and he leaned against the back of your chair. Putting his arm on top of your head like you’ve been childhood best friends. “You know, I like you. You’ve got style. Most people don’t appreciate a good chimichanga.”

He said, as if he wasn’t trying to kill you two minutes prior.

“Are we going somewhere with this?” you asked, your tone still indifferent. You brought this question up a second time. Was he still trying to kill you?

“Right, right, getting sidetracked,” Deadpool said, snapping back to the task at hand. “So, here’s the deal: I’m gonna try and scare the crap out of you, and you’re gonna react like a normal human being. Got it?”

“Sure,” you agreed, not sounding convinced.

“Alright!” Deadpool clapped his hands together. “Let’s start with something simple. How about… I cut off a finger?”

You held up your hand, which was still loosely tied. “You gonna untie me first, or do I do it myself?”

Deadpool rolled his eyes. “You’re really killing the vibe here, you know that?”

You shrugged again. “Look, man, it’s been a long week. Just get on with it.”

Deadpool sighed dramatically. “Okay, okay. Plan B.” He suddenly leaned in close, his voice dropping to a menacing whisper. “We are going to start an only fans.”

You looked at him, deadpan. “Seriously? No one is going to pay for that shit.”

“Hey, people totally dig the whole “I got kidnapped by a hot anti-hero and now I’m slowly falling for them.” Deadpool retorted, pointing at the screen, hoping whoever reading this did not have a watt pad phase.

“This is ridiculous,” you muttered.

“You’re right,” Deadpool said, standing up straight and tossing the a coin aside. “You know what? You’re impossible to scare. So, I’m gonna make you wish you’d never crossed paths with me.”

Without warning, he drew one of his katanas and sliced a shallow cut across your cheek. The cold steel was sharp, precise, and for the first time, you felt a sting of pain.

The burn of cut flesh.

“Finally,” you muttered, almost relieved.

Deadpool noticed the change in your eyes—the hint of happiness, the glimmer of anticipation. He smirked under his mask, raising the blade as if to deliver the final blow.

You closed your eyes, ready to embrace the end. But then, nothing.

You opened your eyes to find Deadpool standing there, the blade poised but unmoving. He tilted his head, studying your reaction.

“Aw, were you actually looking forward to that?” Deadpool asked, his tone mockingly sweet.

Your expression darkened, and anger flared in your eyes. “You…”

Deadpool sheathed his katana, chuckling. “Gotcha. ❤︎ Think I’m going to let you die? Nah, you’re my new piss boy!”

“You are such an ass,” you snapped, genuinely pissed off now.

Deadpool laughed heartily, clearly enjoying your frustration. “Finally! A reaction! See? I knew you had it in you.”

He ruffled your disheveled hair. “Who’s a good boy?”

You glared at him, what a loser. “Actually fucking kill yourself.”

“Not today,” Deadpool said, still chuckling. He untied your ropes with a flourish. “Let’s go get those chimichangas.”

As the two of you headed out of the warehouse, you couldn’t help but shake your head at the absurdity of it all. Were you getting kidnapped again? Did it count if you voluntarily? Would Deadpool ever shut up and just kill you?

“So,” Deadpool said, slinging an arm around your shoulders. “How’s your spice tolerance?”

“Depends,” you replied. “Are you paying?”

“You wish.” Deadpool chuckled.

Bitch.

a/n: Lowkey kinda cringed. But eh. Can’t wait for the deadpool and wolverine movie to come out so I can write for the two of them. (making out) feel free to request :)